Podcast Summary

First Date with Lauren Compton

Episode: "23andMe Is Lying To You" w/ Kurt Metzger
Date: October 28, 2025
Guest: Kurt Metzger (comedian, The Jimmy Dore Show)
Host: Lauren Compton
Studio: YMH Studios

Overview

This episode of First Date with Lauren Compton features comedian Kurt Metzger in a hilarious and chaotic exploration of modern dating, relationship dynamics, and the perils of personal DNA testing. The conversation careens from Kurt’s dating history and relationship philosophy, to conspiracy theories around 23andMe, with plenty of wild stories and sarcastic banter. Lauren’s goal is to discover what dating Kurt would be like, tally his "red flags," and see whether he's second-date material.

Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Kurt’s Relationship History & Philosophy

How They Met: Kurt has been with his current girlfriend for about three years. They met at a comedy show ("Hard Lemonade") and have lived together both in LA and now.
Dating Style:
- Kurt isn’t one for traditional dates—“Who the fuck goes on dates?... After we were already fucking, we went on dates.” (06:14)
- He prefers going with the flow, has no "type," and believes most of dating is about timing and luck, not effort.
On Breakups:
- Never broken up due to cheating—“No one's ever caught me.”
- Most breakups just happen “because you’re together for a while and then it fizzles out.”
Jealousy: Not easily jealous—"If I wouldn't be in a relationship with somebody if I felt insecure... break up then. Why are you putting up with this?" (15:59)

2. Pet Peeves and Living Together

Kurt’s Pet Peeve: His girlfriend likes collecting old antique furniture, leading to frequent chores involving carrying "splintery desk[s] filled with spiders." (13:09-13:38)
Dynamic: He credits her as a good “curator” of antiques that actually look good in their house.
Reverse: Believes his girlfriend likely has more pet peeves about him.

3. Tastes: Food, Outfits, and Dates

Favorite Food: Enjoys steakhouses and restaurants like Minetta Tavern in NYC, prefers food without “poisons, hormones, or Bill Gates tumor meat.” (07:44-08:05)
Date Spots: Recommends shooting ranges as first dates, claiming "you will get laid if you do that." (06:29-06:49)
Personal Style: Likes eccentric, funny outfits and accessories: “I mean, what else? Hey.” (20:52) Owns light-up TEMU shoes, likes to dress up for podcasts.

4. Gender Roles, Dating Expenses, and Power Dynamics

Who Pays on a Date?: Traditionally the man, but his experience varied based on age and financial status in the relationship.
- “When I was younger, I didn’t have any money ... there’s a power thing of paying that is very likeable then.” (21:28-22:26)

5. 23andMe, DNA Testing, and Conspiracies

Skepticism: Adamantly opposed to DNA tests—“My sister did [23andMe]. I told her not to. Now the Mormons know.” (22:34)
Quote: “The main thing is they’ve got your DNA now. That’s the main important part.” (22:56)
Data Leaks & Paranoia: Believes 23andMe purposely "lost" all the private DNA information and hints at government or foreign selling—"I'm sure that was the plan to get it. They sold it, of course, to China." (23:01-23:12)
Misinformation: Jokes about how the results could just be made up—"What if they lied to you?" (22:43)

6. Pop Culture: Taylor Swift Amnesia

Taylor Swift “Amnesia Syndrome”: Kurt brings up the phenomenon where fans allegedly forget the concert experience, theorizes it’s “subliminal messaging,” and blames industry manipulation.
- “There’s no what if about it. Why would that be a popular [thing]?” (33:10)
- “All the things you like are part of [the system].” (33:22)

7. Social & Political Riffs

News Media Critique:
- Sees most news and pop culture as distractions—“The same reason all this bullshit goes on—to keep you occupied, so you don't know about the horrible news that I'm going to have to go cover later today. … It works great.” (34:11-34:26)
- Cynical about the right/left political divide—“If you still believe in right and left, and you think that’s a real thing, you’re dumber than any pro wrestling fan. Because pro wrestling fans know wrestling is fake." (36:25-36:44)

8. Romance, Chivalry and Wild Stories

“Most Romantic” Gestures:
- “If a dude came in my fucking lawn and in any way [threatened her], I would crash dummy out. If I think my chicks in any kind of danger … I will have such a zero tolerance for it.” (43:05)
- Tells a story about confronting men who harassed his girlfriend, interrupting work to handle it, and the neighborhood drama that followed.
Self-Deprecating Take on Romance:
- “I'm not willing to put in work. If I'm working, then I'm out.” (39:12)
- Jokes about “pulling a gun on a guy that complimented her feet” as a romantic act. (39:35-40:07)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

On traditional dating:
- “I’ve never talked myself into pussy ever. I’ve talked myself out of pussy many a time. Never into it. So I just get out of the way of the sale.” (38:03)
On 23andMe:
- “My sister did [23andMe]. I told her not to. Now the Mormons know.” (22:34)
- “Well, the main thing is they’ve got your DNA now. That’s the main important part of it.” (22:56)
On skepticism:
- “I'm sure they didn't lose it and it was hacked. I'm sure that was the plan to get it. They sold it, of course, to China.” (23:06-23:12)
On love and effort:
- "I'm not willing to work at it. If I'm working, then I'm out." (39:12)
On news coverage:
- “The same reason all this bullshit goes on—to keep you occupied, so you don't know about the horrible news that I'm going to have to go cover later today.” (34:11)
On personal style:
- "This is my first first date that I've ever gone, so that's why I want to have the right shoes." (17:58)
On household cleanliness as a single man:
- "The floor is like a desolate battlefield of jizz rags. Like a WWII horror of warfare, but of jizz rags." (26:14-26:19)

Timestamps for Important Segments

Introduction & premise: 00:00–01:10
Kurt’s relationship history: 01:45–03:40
Pet peeves & living with antiques: 13:05–14:00
Favorite foods and going out: 07:38–09:18
Who pays on a date: 21:20–22:15
23andMe skepticism and data conspiracies: 22:34–23:25
Taylor Swift “amnesia syndrome”: 31:02–34:05
Romance and chivalry stories: 39:35–47:50
Kurt’s critique of news & distractions: 34:11–36:44
Wrap up & plugs: 49:15–49:41

Style and Tone

The conversation is irreverent, sarcastic, and peppered with tangents, dark humor, and unfiltered perspectives. Lauren’s playful curiosity dishes out just enough structure, but Kurt’s unpredictable storytelling and conspiracy musings steal the show.

Podcast Summary

First Date with Lauren Compton

Episode: "23andMe Is Lying To You" w/ Kurt Metzger
Date: October 28, 2025
Guest: Kurt Metzger (comedian, The Jimmy Dore Show)
Host: Lauren Compton
Studio: YMH Studios

Overview

Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Kurt’s Relationship History & Philosophy

How They Met: Kurt has been with his current girlfriend for about three years. They met at a comedy show ("Hard Lemonade") and have lived together both in LA and now.
Dating Style:
- Kurt isn’t one for traditional dates—“Who the fuck goes on dates?... After we were already fucking, we went on dates.” (06:14)
- He prefers going with the flow, has no "type," and believes most of dating is about timing and luck, not effort.
On Breakups:
- Never broken up due to cheating—“No one's ever caught me.”
- Most breakups just happen “because you’re together for a while and then it fizzles out.”
Jealousy: Not easily jealous—"If I wouldn't be in a relationship with somebody if I felt insecure... break up then. Why are you putting up with this?" (15:59)

2. Pet Peeves and Living Together

Kurt’s Pet Peeve: His girlfriend likes collecting old antique furniture, leading to frequent chores involving carrying "splintery desk[s] filled with spiders." (13:09-13:38)
Dynamic: He credits her as a good “curator” of antiques that actually look good in their house.
Reverse: Believes his girlfriend likely has more pet peeves about him.

3. Tastes: Food, Outfits, and Dates

Favorite Food: Enjoys steakhouses and restaurants like Minetta Tavern in NYC, prefers food without “poisons, hormones, or Bill Gates tumor meat.” (07:44-08:05)
Date Spots: Recommends shooting ranges as first dates, claiming "you will get laid if you do that." (06:29-06:49)
Personal Style: Likes eccentric, funny outfits and accessories: “I mean, what else? Hey.” (20:52) Owns light-up TEMU shoes, likes to dress up for podcasts.

4. Gender Roles, Dating Expenses, and Power Dynamics

Who Pays on a Date?: Traditionally the man, but his experience varied based on age and financial status in the relationship.
- “When I was younger, I didn’t have any money ... there’s a power thing of paying that is very likeable then.” (21:28-22:26)

5. 23andMe, DNA Testing, and Conspiracies

Skepticism: Adamantly opposed to DNA tests—“My sister did [23andMe]. I told her not to. Now the Mormons know.” (22:34)
Quote: “The main thing is they’ve got your DNA now. That’s the main important part.” (22:56)
Data Leaks & Paranoia: Believes 23andMe purposely "lost" all the private DNA information and hints at government or foreign selling—"I'm sure that was the plan to get it. They sold it, of course, to China." (23:01-23:12)
Misinformation: Jokes about how the results could just be made up—"What if they lied to you?" (22:43)

6. Pop Culture: Taylor Swift Amnesia

Taylor Swift “Amnesia Syndrome”: Kurt brings up the phenomenon where fans allegedly forget the concert experience, theorizes it’s “subliminal messaging,” and blames industry manipulation.
- “There’s no what if about it. Why would that be a popular [thing]?” (33:10)
- “All the things you like are part of [the system].” (33:22)

7. Social & Political Riffs

News Media Critique:
- Sees most news and pop culture as distractions—“The same reason all this bullshit goes on—to keep you occupied, so you don't know about the horrible news that I'm going to have to go cover later today. … It works great.” (34:11-34:26)
- Cynical about the right/left political divide—“If you still believe in right and left, and you think that’s a real thing, you’re dumber than any pro wrestling fan. Because pro wrestling fans know wrestling is fake." (36:25-36:44)

8. Romance, Chivalry and Wild Stories

“Most Romantic” Gestures:
- “If a dude came in my fucking lawn and in any way [threatened her], I would crash dummy out. If I think my chicks in any kind of danger … I will have such a zero tolerance for it.” (43:05)
- Tells a story about confronting men who harassed his girlfriend, interrupting work to handle it, and the neighborhood drama that followed.
Self-Deprecating Take on Romance:
- “I'm not willing to put in work. If I'm working, then I'm out.” (39:12)
- Jokes about “pulling a gun on a guy that complimented her feet” as a romantic act. (39:35-40:07)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

On traditional dating:
- “I’ve never talked myself into pussy ever. I’ve talked myself out of pussy many a time. Never into it. So I just get out of the way of the sale.” (38:03)
On 23andMe:
- “My sister did [23andMe]. I told her not to. Now the Mormons know.” (22:34)
- “Well, the main thing is they’ve got your DNA now. That’s the main important part of it.” (22:56)
On skepticism:
- “I'm sure they didn't lose it and it was hacked. I'm sure that was the plan to get it. They sold it, of course, to China.” (23:06-23:12)
On love and effort:
- "I'm not willing to work at it. If I'm working, then I'm out." (39:12)
On news coverage:
- “The same reason all this bullshit goes on—to keep you occupied, so you don't know about the horrible news that I'm going to have to go cover later today.” (34:11)
On personal style:
- "This is my first first date that I've ever gone, so that's why I want to have the right shoes." (17:58)
On household cleanliness as a single man:
- "The floor is like a desolate battlefield of jizz rags. Like a WWII horror of warfare, but of jizz rags." (26:14-26:19)

Timestamps for Important Segments

Introduction & premise: 00:00–01:10
Kurt’s relationship history: 01:45–03:40
Pet peeves & living with antiques: 13:05–14:00
Favorite foods and going out: 07:38–09:18
Who pays on a date: 21:20–22:15
23andMe skepticism and data conspiracies: 22:34–23:25
Taylor Swift “amnesia syndrome”: 31:02–34:05
Romance and chivalry stories: 39:35–47:50
Kurt’s critique of news & distractions: 34:11–36:44
Wrap up & plugs: 49:15–49:41

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23andMe Is Lying To You w/ Kurt Metzger | First Date with Lauren Compton

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Summary

Podcast Summary

First Date with Lauren Compton

Overview

Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Kurt’s Relationship History & Philosophy

2. Pet Peeves and Living Together

3. Tastes: Food, Outfits, and Dates

4. Gender Roles, Dating Expenses, and Power Dynamics

5. 23andMe, DNA Testing, and Conspiracies

6. Pop Culture: Taylor Swift Amnesia

7. Social & Political Riffs

8. Romance, Chivalry and Wild Stories

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

Timestamps for Important Segments

Style and Tone

Summary

Podcast Summary

First Date with Lauren Compton

Overview

Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Kurt’s Relationship History & Philosophy

2. Pet Peeves and Living Together

3. Tastes: Food, Outfits, and Dates

4. Gender Roles, Dating Expenses, and Power Dynamics

5. 23andMe, DNA Testing, and Conspiracies

6. Pop Culture: Taylor Swift Amnesia

7. Social & Political Riffs

8. Romance, Chivalry and Wild Stories

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

Timestamps for Important Segments

Style and Tone