Dating After Divorce w/ Jessica Kirson | First Date with Lauren Compton

Summary

Podcast Summary: First Date with Lauren Compton Episode: Dating After Divorce with Jessica Kierson
Release Date: June 17, 2025
Host: Jessica Kierson
Guest: Comedian Jessica Kierson

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Introduction

In this engaging episode of First Date with Lauren Compton, host Jessica Kierson welcomes comedian Jessica Kierson to discuss the intricacies of dating after divorce. The conversation delves into personal experiences, relationship dynamics, and the humorous side of navigating the dating world post-divorce.

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Personal Background and Relationship Status

Origin and Early Life: Jessica Kierson shares her roots, mentioning she grew up in South Orange, New Jersey, and later moved to Long Island. She humorously comments on the stereotypical aspects of being from Jersey, saying, "I know people always make fun of it, but it's, you know, it smells worse here" (00:42).

Current Relationship Status: Jessica reveals that she is on the verge of divorce, stating, "I'm this close to being divorced" (01:21). She emphasizes her privacy regarding past relationships, explaining, "I would never trash someone I was with" (01:42), and mentions her separation has been ongoing for years.

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Relationships in Comedy

Incorporating Personal Life into Stand-Up: When asked if her relationship struggles make it into her stand-up routine, Jessica responds, "I didn't wanna do that. And I would never, like, trash the mothers of my children" (02:06). She balances honesty with discretion, choosing not to delve into negative aspects publicly.

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Finding a New Partner

Meeting Her Current Partner: Jessica shares the story of how she met her current partner through a mutual comedian. She admits her nervousness about dating, especially since she had been in long-term relationships without traditional dating, saying, "I had only been like two dates in my life" (02:55).

First Date Experience: Describing her first date, Jessica recounts feeling "intimidated" and "uncomfortable," even falling over during a hug (03:52). She highlights the contrast between her vibrant stage persona and her reserved in-person demeanor.

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Traveling Together

Travel Dynamics: Jessica discusses the importance of compatibility in travel, noting, "When you travel with someone, it's like a make it or break" (07:10). She and her partner have traveled extensively in Canada, visiting cities like Vancouver, Montreal, and Toronto, with Jessica expressing a fondness for Vancouver's beauty.

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Red Flags in Dating

Identifying Deal-Breakers: A significant red flag for Jessica is encountering someone who is "mean-spirited," particularly through teasing or mocking (08:39). She elaborates on her sensitivity to judgment, stemming from her upbringing, stating, "It's not funny. And in. See to someone else" (09:17).

Host's Perspective: Jessica Kierson adds her own experiences, mentioning how some dates try to be "artificially funny," which can lead to discomfort and awkwardness (10:00).

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Sexuality and Personal Growth

Coming to Terms with Sexuality: Jessica opens up about her realization of being gay, detailing her past relationships with men during her youth and college years. She reflects, "I never spent time with him... and it was not interested" (13:00), leading to a seven-year relationship with her first girlfriend.

Family Acceptance: Discussing her family's reaction, Jessica is grateful for their support, especially her mother, who responded, "Of course I know you" when she came out (16:37).

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Family Dynamics and Introducing Partners

Introduction to Family: Jessica talks about the careful approach she takes when introducing someone to her family, ensuring it's a serious relationship before making introductions.

Impact on Children: She emphasizes the importance of stability for her children, stating, "It's so much worse to stay" in an unhappy relationship (27:00), highlighting the well-being of her kids as a priority.

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Astrology and Personal Traits

Astrological Beliefs: The conversation shifts to astrology, with both Jessica Kierson and her guest discussing their beliefs. Jessica guest mentions, "I was into astrology and I believe in it, but I don't follow it anymore" (22:46).

Zodiac Compatibility: They explore zodiac compatibility, particularly between Virgos and Scorpios, with Jessica sharing her challenges connecting with Scorpios due to their intense nature (23:29).

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Social Media and Viral Moments

Online Presence: Jessica discusses her active presence on YouTube and TikTok, sharing experiences with both positive and negative feedback. She humorously recounts, "I found out I wasn't funny" when her humorous videos received brutal criticism (33:44).

Viral Incident: A notable moment includes a car video where she sings, which led to a viral backlash with comments like, "I hope she hits a wall and dies on impact" (35:09). Jessica takes it in stride, highlighting the unpredictable nature of online fame.

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Sweet Gestures and Kindness

Acts of Kindness: Towards the episode's end, Jessica reflects on the sweetest things she's done, such as giving her ex-wife dozen flowers and helping strangers in public. She shares a heartfelt comment, "I have a very big heart that way" (30:45).

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Conclusion

The episode concludes with light-hearted banter about astrology and personal traits. Jessica Kierson wraps up by encouraging listeners to engage with her viral content, maintaining the show's signature blend of humor and heartfelt conversation.

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Notable Quotes

• Jessica Kierson: "I'm this close to being divorced." (01:21)
• Guest: "I would never trash the mothers of my children." (02:06)
• Jessica Kierson: "It's like, you have to go to a formal." (32:22)
• Guest: "Bad press is good press. I'm serious." (34:07)
• Jessica Kierson: "I have a very big heart that way." (30:45)

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Key Takeaways

• Navigating Divorce and Dating: Jessica Kierson provides an honest look into the challenges of dating after divorce, emphasizing the importance of personal growth and stability for children.
• Humor as a Coping Mechanism: Utilizing comedy to process personal experiences, Jessica highlights how humor can bridge the gap between personal struggles and relatable content.
• Authenticity in Relationships: Both host and guest advocate for genuine connections, steering clear of superficial interactions that lack depth and sincerity.
• Impact of Social Media: The discussion underscores the unpredictable nature of online fame, where viral moments can significantly influence public perception.
• Astrological Insights: Exploring zodiac traits offers a humorous yet insightful perspective on personal compatibility and relationship dynamics.

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Listen to the full episode on JessicaKierson.com or your preferred podcast platform to explore more about dating after divorce and enjoy Jessica's unique comedic insights.

Transcript

[Jessica Kierson]

I'm so excited to see you tonight.

[Unknown Comedian]

First date, baby. First date. I can't wait. First date.

[Jessica Kierson]

Hello, and welcome to another episode of First Date. Today. My guest is a very funny comedian. She has a new special out on Hulu called I'm the Man. Give it up for Jessica Kierson.

[Unknown Comedian]

Thank you.

[Jessica Kierson]

Thank you so much for coming on my show.

[Unknown Comedian]

I love. I'm. I'm so happy to be here. You have great energy.

[Jessica Kierson]

Thank you.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

Where are you from?

[Unknown Comedian]

I grew up in South Orange, New Jersey.

[Jessica Kierson]

Okay.

[Unknown Comedian]

And I love Jersey. I'm like a big Jersey person. I know people always make fun of it, but it's, you know, it smells worse here. But I. Yeah. And I live on Long island now.

[Jessica Kierson]

Oh, really?

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

Do you ever. Do you come to Austin a lot?

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah, yeah, I come at least two or three times a year.

[Jessica Kierson]

That's a lot.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah. I mean, it is when you're traveling all over, so.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

Make it a point to come here.

[Jessica Kierson]

What's your. Have you always lived in New York? New. In New Jersey, like, up north?

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah, yeah, I've always lived. I lived in New Jersey, and then I lived. When I was doing standup at first in the city for a long time, and then I moved to Long Island.

[Jessica Kierson]

Okay.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

All right. And so you're married?

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah, no, I'm not married anymore. See, this is. I love that I'm doing this because no one really knows this, so I'm. I'm this close to being divorced.

[Jessica Kierson]

Okay.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah. So I, I.

[Jessica Kierson]

You're just, like, waiting on a signature.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah, yeah. Like, everyone is just like, she's married. Yeah. I'm. I'm. I'm. I have a new partner, but I'm. Yeah, I've been going through. I've been separated for years.

[Jessica Kierson]

Oh, okay.

[Unknown Comedian]

But it's not something you say. Like, first of all, I'm so private about my relationships, meaning I would never trash someone I was with. So, you know, a lot of people go on stage and they're like, yeah, fudgeing bitch. Like, I would never do that. So it's. And I wouldn't, you know, it was not appropriate to talk about it at the time because we were processing it and have kids, so.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

Do you. So in your standup, do you ever talk about your. What you're going through, relationship wise? Because sometimes that material can be really relatable.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yes. I mean, I. I don't know. I guess if it was good for a while, I would have talked about my marriage.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

But when it's stressful, and you're both not happy. It's not. What's gonna come out is gonna be. Cause I'm so real on stage, it's gonna be like, negative. So I didn't wanna do that. And I would never, like, trash the mothers of my children, you know, but now I would. Cause it's. No, not trash the mother.

[Jessica Kierson]

I'm like, all right, let's go.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah, I trash you, you know, the mother of your children. No, I would talk about like a relationship now.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

Well, the relationship that you're in. How did you meet your partner?

[Unknown Comedian]

We met through a comedian who knew her and knew me and said we should meet up. And I was really, really nervous. This is interesting because I have just been in long term relationships and had like, you know, a couple people I was dating or whatever. But like, I, I had only been like, I swear to God on like two dates in my life. That's why it's interesting for me. Why?

[Jessica Kierson]

Just because you, you were so monogamous or you.

[Unknown Comedian]

I, I, I was so, I just wasn't a dater. You know, I met someone and then just ended up being in like a long term relationship. Yeah, I mean, there's people, like, I've of course had things with in my life a bunch, but I didn't go on like a date with them. Like, hi, I'm Jessica. Hi. We're gonna go on a date in a restaurant. So I was panicked about going on this date.

[Jessica Kierson]

Where'd you guys go?

[Unknown Comedian]

Really nervous. Like, I met her outside and we hugged and I fell over. Like, I was a nervous, I really was nervous.

[Jessica Kierson]

Where did you guys go?

[Unknown Comedian]

We went to, like a really nice restaurant in the city and I was just like, I mean, we had been te, but different. When you meet someone, it's really different. And I watched her like, walk, you know, in front of, from the window in front of the restaurant. And then we, like sat down and I was like, hi. Like, so uncomfortable. So intimidated and uncomfortable. Cause I'm very, like, I'm big on stage and loud, whatever. But like, in person I'm really like, little, like, I was like, hi.

[Jessica Kierson]

So is she in comedy too?

[Unknown Comedian]

She is not. She wrote a book and she, her book is amazing. It's called Kissing Girls on Shabbat. She's an ex Hasidic. Really? It's fascinating. Fascinating. So she speaks, she's a speaker. So sometimes I go with her on her gigs and sometimes she comes to mine.

[Jessica Kierson]

That's fun.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah, she says trauma therapist. It's perfect.

[Jessica Kierson]

I'm A wow.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah. She's a big trauma therapist.

[Jessica Kierson]

So how long did it take you to feel comfortable?

[Unknown Comedian]

I really felt comfortable. You mean on the date with her? I felt comfortable with her with the texting, you know, she's also like a doctor. Like, I was just intimidated. I'm just like this traveling clown, you.

[Jessica Kierson]

Know, which is so wild because, you know, being a comedian, I think that people have the, the perception that we can fire off really quick and.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah. That I know. Isn't that true?

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

I can't when I'm, I'm very socially awkward. Very like. I don't know if you are, but I'm like, especially in like big groups or something. I, I, I just, I'm better with like a small group. But I felt comfortable with her, you know, probably like, not because of her, but just if it were anyone like an hour into the date. Like, we sat there for a long time.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

And talked. And I wasn't, I was intimidated by her. She's intimidating.

[Jessica Kierson]

What do you look for in a partner?

[Unknown Comedian]

I said, like, when I became single, I'm like, someone who's kind and who works on them. Kindness is the biggest thing. Works on themselves and who I can commute. The biggest thing is communicating with. Like, I can communicate with like my ex and I didn't communicate well. Like, I'm not blaming her. It was just neither one. Our combination was not good. Not good at all. Like, she's in another relationship. Very happy. Like, you need to be with someone that you can. Yeah. Work through things with.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah. What, where did, where did you guys have you guys traveled?

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah, we started traveling soon into it because I'm on the road so much. And she speaks also on the road. So it's.

[Jessica Kierson]

I have found that when you travel with someone that you're interested in you, it's like a make it or break.

[Unknown Comedian]

It 100% because you either really connect. Yep.

[Jessica Kierson]

Or you just like, don't you, you don't vibe on, like, what each other want to do, the places that you want to go eat, everything.

[Unknown Comedian]

Right.

[Jessica Kierson]

The things you want to see. Some people think churches are like, just really boring to go into. I think they're really beautiful.

[Unknown Comedian]

I do too.

[Jessica Kierson]

These are actually really, really unique places.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

But yeah, you learn so much about someone when you travel. Vacation wise, where's your favorite place that you guys have gone?

[Unknown Comedian]

Well, I think it's so interesting what you just said because I completely agree with you. And we, we had a pretty easy time traveling together. Like, there was no issues, nothing. Like we Were both like, my God, there's no, like, there's nothing about you that's annoying me right now.

[Jessica Kierson]

It's.

[Unknown Comedian]

It's weird. Like we just were like, what do you want to do? I don't care. What do you want? It's very laid back. I think. Where was the best place? I mean, we had a lot of fun in Canada. We went to. She did some talk.

[Jessica Kierson]

Did you go in the winter?

[Unknown Comedian]

Yes.

[Jessica Kierson]

Canada can be really gorgeous. Like Vancouver.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yes, we went to Vancouver and Montreal and Toronto, I think all the best places. Yeah. Yeah, I know. I love Vancouver.

[Jessica Kierson]

I do too.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

It's so beautiful.

[Unknown Comedian]

It is. Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

Well, what is something that someone can do. Like a massive red flag that will just like totally kill the vibe for you.

[Unknown Comedian]

Be mean spirited to me.

[Jessica Kierson]

To you?

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

Has anyone been mean to you?

[Unknown Comedian]

Of course. I've been in like long term relationships with people and I came from that. It's like, it's what I consider mean spirited though.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

You know what I'm saying? Where someone else might not consider being mean spirited. I'm a very hard time with.

[Jessica Kierson]

Someone.

[Unknown Comedian]

Judging me or being or teasing me or mocking me. You know, I grew up with that. So it's. I'm not. It's not great.

[Jessica Kierson]

Not a fan.

[Unknown Comedian]

No. No.

[Jessica Kierson]

It's also not funny.

[Unknown Comedian]

It's not funny. And in. See to someone else and the way they grew up, it's funny. But meaning, like, it's not so offensive.

[Jessica Kierson]

Right.

[Unknown Comedian]

But you know, I grew up with that with my father. Always like, you know, nice shirt. Nice. And it's like not funny. It's not funny. When you do it every single day. It's not funny. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I think being judged or like put down or teased.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah. I can, I can be on board with that.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

I've had. When I go out on dates, I've had people try to be like artificially funny.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah, of course.

[Jessica Kierson]

Because they. They think that that's how we're gonna like joke around.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

And it's just so. It just falls so flat and I'm.

[Unknown Comedian]

Just like so uncomfortable. Isn't it?

[Jessica Kierson]

Like, how long do we have to wait until I get to meet you?

[Unknown Comedian]

I know. I think people do that because, I mean in the beginning on a date, like a first date or whatever, because they're uncomfortable. So a lot of people are like, hey, yeah. Like, it's like, yeah, that's not who you are. I can see right through it. This is y. Not funny.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

I bet a lot of guys are like that with women. It's not really a lesbian thing.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

I mean, it. It is, but not like it is, I think, with some straight men.

[Jessica Kierson]

What's a common lesbian thing?

[Unknown Comedian]

Crying. A lot of crying on dates. I don't mean to laugh, but I'm joking. I'm joking.

[Jessica Kierson]

What do they cry about?

[Unknown Comedian]

Well, everything. I mean, it's two women. No, I think sinners. I think. I think it's like. I don't know. I think women get deeper, quicker probably. You know, get to, like, the deep stuff. Yeah, I would. I think so. Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

I'd be a terrible lesbian. I'm horrible at that.

[Unknown Comedian]

Really?

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah. Whenever I, like, hang out with my girlfriends and stuff, like, some girls really like to start diving into, like, the. About their boyfriends. And I'm like. I'm like, you know, you're supposed to like your boyfriend.

[Unknown Comedian]

Oh, that's so. I know. Well, you're cutting. Yes. You're not like, well, you should talk to him and try to get him.

[Jessica Kierson]

No, I just go straight for the throat. I'm just like, you know, all you do is tell me about how much you don't like all this horrible.

[Unknown Comedian]

But that's honest and that's true.

[Jessica Kierson]

I know, but we.

[Unknown Comedian]

So many women stay and they never get out. I know.

[Jessica Kierson]

I'm like, tell me one positive thing that you like about your relationship.

[Unknown Comedian]

If someone can't tell you one positive thing, then that's really.

[Jessica Kierson]

You got horrific.

[Unknown Comedian]

Like. Yeah. I would just say you have to leave.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah. Go to the projects and marry for love.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

Because that's. That's a common thing with girls is that they just want to, like, get together and talk shit. So when I'm with my friends, I. I don't let them cry.

[Unknown Comedian]

I kind of like that, though, because you're just being, like, honest about it instead of enabling someone. I think a lot of women enable each other, but also when you're with a.

[Jessica Kierson]

When you're with a girl, you want to, like, get away from some of that drama sometimes and have fun.

[Unknown Comedian]

Of course. No, I think, you know what? I. It's like, you should do that through phone conversations or like one on one. I think if you're in a big group. Yeah, there's. If you're just constantly complaining and talking about, you know, your problems in a relationship, it's. It probably gets very tiresome.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah. Have you ever dated a guy?

[Unknown Comedian]

Yes. I never. It's funny, I guess. I dated a guy. I had no idea I was gay when I was younger, but I was clearly gay. I was, like, literally, like a boy. Very tomboyish.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

Very into sports. Always, you know, felt very uncomfortable in a dress. I wore them, though. I had no idea. This is from a different generation. So no one was gay when I grew up. No one was gay. They were. This boy was a little feminine. Or this girl was a tomboy. Right. And I had a boyfriend in high school, but, like, I never spent time with him. And it was, like, six months and was not interested. And then when I went to college, I was in a sorority, which I loved, at University of Maryland. And I just, you know, I always wanted to be with my girlfriends. And when I was, like, hanging out with a guy, I was like, I can't wait to get out of here.

[Jessica Kierson]

Wow.

[Unknown Comedian]

But I, you know, had sex with guys in college.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

But I didn't, Like, I'm not. I wasn't repulsed by guys physically, but I could never fall in love with a guy. Ever.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

And I just didn't really want to spend a ton of guy time with them. It's interesting because most of my closest friends are guys. 90 of my friend. Like, my closest friends are men. I love men, but I just couldn't fall in love with them.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah. What was the moment that you realized?

[Unknown Comedian]

Like, it was even at, like, I. So I've told this before, but I. Not here, obviously, but I met my first girlfriend in. In my sorority. Isn't that amazing? It's a great story.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

And in college. Yes. And I didn't know what was going on. I just knew that I. We would sit in a car and stare at each other for hours. Now that I think about it, I'm like, what? We would just stare at each other. We were in love with each other, but I had no idea what was going on. And it wasn't even. Like, did she. No. Neither one of us did. I would get jealous when, like, she went to a formal or, you know, an event with a guy, but I was like, why am I jealous? Like, I literally had no idea what was going on.

[Jessica Kierson]

Was she, like, your best friend?

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah. We were, like, obsessed with each other.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

And I'm like, why am I getting jealous of her? It wasn't even, like, a sexual thing.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

It was really. Falling in love with. It wasn't. There was nothing sexual. I thought she was stunning. But, like, I didn't even think of that. I didn't. It wasn't even an option in my mind. And then we went home for Christmas break, and we. We drank wine and smoke pot at my. My House where my mom. You know, no one was there. And we. This is such a. Like, a porn thing to say. But we started, like, wrestling and joking. I know. It's amazing. It's amazing, right?

[Jessica Kierson]

Did you date her for a while?

[Unknown Comedian]

I ended up being with her for seven years.

[Jessica Kierson]

Wow.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah. But it was a secret for years, and it almost killed me.

[Jessica Kierson]

Really?

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah. I was really, really, really ashamed. Again, this is a different generation. I was really scared to tell people. And she was still at school for a couple of years after I gr. So she didn't want people to know there. It wasn't okay. I'm telling you. It was like, no one was out. In my sorority of hundreds of girls, it just wasn't like that. And I ended up telling my mother, and she's like, I. I know, like, every. You know. Of course I know you.

[Jessica Kierson]

She did?

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah. My mom's really cool, too. And a therapist and my dad, and really their only concern was how I would be treated in the world. And they felt sad that I couldn't, like, walk down the street holding hands with someone that I love. And they thought they would never have grandkids. I mean, that's how it was then, so. But they were very, very accepting. Thank God. I'm very lucky.

[Jessica Kierson]

Do you like to cook?

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

Do you cook a lot at home?

[Unknown Comedian]

I don't. I cook for my kids.

[Jessica Kierson]

Okay.

[Unknown Comedian]

But I don't. I wouldn't, like, cook a whole meal for myself. And, you know, I. I guess, like, because I'm on the road so much, I don't, like, spend the time. I'm just so used to being a road comic.

[Jessica Kierson]

How do you stay in shape on the road?

[Unknown Comedian]

I'm not in shape.

[Jessica Kierson]

You look great.

[Unknown Comedian]

Thank you. I am so. I'm a second away from being in the hospital, but I. That's very sweet. I'm. I'm. I need to drink more water. I don't.

[Jessica Kierson]

Like, everybody needs to drink more water.

[Unknown Comedian]

I drink a teaspoon a day. It's really hard.

[Jessica Kierson]

Okay. Yeah. You need to drink more water.

[Unknown Comedian]

I realized I look and feel much better than I did. I was not in good shape at all for a long time. But once I started, really, like, my career started, like, getting better and better and doing more shows in theaters. I'm like, I have to. I have to be okay. Like, I cannot be.

[Jessica Kierson]

You know, it's taxing.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah. You. I can't. Like, I'm older. I have to, like, take care of myself a little.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

What is your favorite kind of food?

[Unknown Comedian]

You know, I don't eat shit food. I eat too much. I don't know if you're like that. Yeah, yeah. Like, yeah, yeah. I'm not gonna sit and eat like M M's and Doritos, but I will eat an entire bag of, like, quinoa chips. You know what I mean? I lie to myself that they're healthier. Yeah, exactly. But I eat the whole bag. But my. My favorite foods are, like. I love food and I'm more into salty than sweet.

[Jessica Kierson]

Me too.

[Unknown Comedian]

So I love chips, you know, nachos. But I love, like, baked ziti. I love, like, that, you know, pot. Like anything with bread, cheese, that kind of thing.

[Jessica Kierson]

That's the new Jersey coming out.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah. Where are you from? Originally?

[Jessica Kierson]

Texas.

[Unknown Comedian]

Oh, okay, cool.

[Jessica Kierson]

Dallas. But then I moved to LA for 16 years.

[Unknown Comedian]

Oh, wow.

[Jessica Kierson]

Back here four years ago.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah. Yeah. So what is your favorite? Is it that kind of stuff too, like food food or.

[Jessica Kierson]

I. Well, so I'm married to a guy that owns a barbecue restaurant, so I'm very, like, meat centric in my family. So we go out to, like, nice steak dinners.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah, I love that too.

[Jessica Kierson]

And like, I like lobster bisque soup and like just the. The typical white tablecloth steak dinner.

[Unknown Comedian]

I love that too.

[Jessica Kierson]

I. It's just like, it never gets old.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

It's salty.

[Unknown Comedian]

I know.

[Jessica Kierson]

Filling. But like, at home, I can go hard on an apple and peanut butter. And by that, I mean an apple and a whole jar.

[Unknown Comedian]

I can eat that too.

[Jessica Kierson]

So it's just having a little apple with my jar of peanut butter. And I have that every night for dinner. Every time I go to the sip.

[Unknown Comedian]

Of apple juice and an entire jar.

[Jessica Kierson]

I can just stick straw in it. I don't even need the apple. It's just an excuse. It's just my way of being healthy.

[Unknown Comedian]

I have, by the way, I was very into apple and peanut butter thing. I was really. I. I'm so glad to hear that. I've eaten. I don't know if this has ever happened to you. I've eaten so much peanut butter that I can't eat it now. Like, I've binged so hard on certain things that I can't. I don't even crave it anymore. I've eaten way too much of it. Yeah, Like, I ate. I. This is weird. I was on a bagel thing, so I was eating so many bagels that I don't eat bagels anymore. I love bagels, which is actually good. Like, if you can just slam it into your face.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

For Like, a couple of years, you. You won't eat it anymore.

[Jessica Kierson]

You'll get tired of it.

[Unknown Comedian]

Exactly.

[Jessica Kierson]

Man, I need to eat more pizza.

[Unknown Comedian]

I love pizza so much.

[Jessica Kierson]

It also never gets old.

[Unknown Comedian]

That. That's my. That's probably my favorite thing.

[Jessica Kierson]

There' place here called Mr. Gaddy's. And I've talked about this on the show before, and it's like an all you can eat buffet. And it is of pizza. Yeah. And it's all you can eat. And then you can even go up to him and ask him to make you a specific kind of pizza.

[Unknown Comedian]

Are you kidding me?

[Jessica Kierson]

No. This place is great.

[Unknown Comedian]

It's all Mr. Gaddy's.

[Jessica Kierson]

And I. I have had it so many times in the last two times I went, Mr. Gatti's, I love you, but the last two times, it's kind of like fallen off. And I'm so grateful.

[Unknown Comedian]

Right. For that. That's what happens when you. When you binge eat on it.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

Then eventually you're like, I needed that. I know. That's a perfect example of what I'm saying.

[Jessica Kierson]

Needed it.

[Unknown Comedian]

What's your fate? Like, what would you order on a pizza? I know there's probably a bunch that you like.

[Jessica Kierson]

I know. I'm just a pepperoni cheese pizza.

[Unknown Comedian]

I love pepperoni.

[Jessica Kierson]

If the sausage is like spicy Italian sausage, I can throw that on there.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

But, like, people who like pineapple on their pizza are. Do you like pineapple on your.

[Unknown Comedian]

No. I mean, I don't. I would never order it. Never.

[Jessica Kierson]

That's because you're not a psychopath.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah, I understand. I order mango. I. Yeah, I'm not into a ton of stuff. I like plain or extra cheese. I mean, more cheese, the better. But I like. I love pepperoni, and I actually like vet. See, this is where my hell. I. This is hilarious. I like vegetable pizza. Like, I make. I say it's okay because it has vegetables on it.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

The whole piece.

[Jessica Kierson]

There's nothing wrong with that.

[Unknown Comedian]

For a while, I was getting gluten free because I told myself that that's healthier, but I'm not. I'm not gluten. Like, there's no problem.

[Jessica Kierson]

There's no problem.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah. This is a true story. So every time I ordered bread or pizza, anything, it was gluten free.

[Jessica Kierson]

But is it healthier for you?

[Unknown Comedian]

No, it's. It's just as bad or maybe worse. Really? Yeah. Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

I didn't. How do you feel about. This is a dating podcast.

[Unknown Comedian]

I know. I love it. Why not? Because I feel like food Is a perfect thing to talk to me about.

[Jessica Kierson]

It's also such a. It's such a. Such a good thing to bond with.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

Someone over.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

It's like traveling.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah. It's. Everyone can talk about food and.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

And we like the same stuff, so it's good.

[Jessica Kierson]

Well, are you into astrology?

[Unknown Comedian]

I was when I was younger. I love astrology and I believe in it, but I don't follow it anymore. Are you?

[Jessica Kierson]

I was into numerology.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah. I like that, too.

[Jessica Kierson]

So I didn't know anything really about, like, I would notice commonalities in people that were signs. Like, Virgos. I'm a Virgo. And I could kind of, like, spot people and girls that were, like, a little bit more organized, a little bit more sensitive. And I'm like, oh, Virgos. Girls that are Scorpios usually don't get along with them.

[Unknown Comedian]

Really? I am, too.

[Jessica Kierson]

Y' all have, like, this fire built in with you and I. My ex husband is Scorpio.

[Unknown Comedian]

Oh.

[Jessica Kierson]

And it's been hard for me to connect with Scorpios because y' all have this big energy.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

And I don't know, it's like a ball of fire, and I don't know how to handle the ball of fire.

[Unknown Comedian]

It's intense.

[Jessica Kierson]

It's a lot.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah, we are intense. I'm not a typical Scorpio in certain ways, but we are. We are very. There's different kinds of Scorpios.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah. Usually you guys are super, super confident, and I find that very intimidating.

[Unknown Comedian]

I'm not. I seem confident, but I'm not. I mean, I know I'm good at certain things, but I am not, like, overly confident.

[Jessica Kierson]

So this is where I'd come in with my numerology.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

And then I would. Did you ever get into numerology?

[Unknown Comedian]

I mean, I've done it. Like, people have done it with me, but, like, I'm fascinated by that, for sure.

[Jessica Kierson]

It's all the numbers of your birthday and, like, the time you're born and all this stuff. And then it, like, lines up and it gives you, like, a number one through 10. And then that number is like, you're either like a. Like a leader or you're this or you're that or whatever. It's been a long time since I've done anything with numerology.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

But I was. But for a while there, I was, like, a bit of a nutcase.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

Because I'd meet someone and be like, what's your birthday? And that's a red flag when Someone's like, what time were you born? And you always have to text your mom and find that information.

[Unknown Comedian]

I know I have. No, I don't. My mother has no idea. She doesn't remember anything about my childhood.

[Jessica Kierson]

Really.

[Unknown Comedian]

I have a whole bit about it that I did in my comic. She was like. Well, she always says the same two things. I mean, it's. It's one of my jokes, but it's the truth. You ran around a lot and you had very curly hair.

[Jessica Kierson]

Really?

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah. That's all. Like, she doesn't remember anything. And she never did. It's not even. Because it's like, a while ago. Like, she. Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

Are you an only child?

[Unknown Comedian]

I'm not. I have an older sister and I have four steps, three now and two halves. But I had only an older sister for a. Like, till I was a. You know, my late teens.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah. Are you all close?

[Unknown Comedian]

Yes. Yes. I'm lucky. It's. I'm lucky that everything worked out because I know people who have horrible situations. Like, we all get along. It's. Yeah. It's interesting. I mean, I was. It was only my sister. Excuse me, Jennifer. And then my dad got remarried and had two kids with his wife. And then my mother married a man who had four kids.

[Jessica Kierson]

Wow.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

How long do you wait until you introduce someone that you're with to your family?

[Unknown Comedian]

It's not right away, but if it's someone that I know that I like and then I know that they'll be okay with or be okay around, yeah, I'll do it. But it's. You know, they'll get the vibe of if it's serious or not.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

And they're protective of me because I've been so unhappy in relationships. And I'm not blaming, but I. The other people. I'm just saying I've been very unhappy and stayed for a long time.

[Jessica Kierson]

Why do you stay?

[Unknown Comedian]

I think that I stayed because I thought it would change. I thought I could change people. I had kids, you know. That makes it really hard. Much harder.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah. That's why I trapped my husband.

[Unknown Comedian]

They're trapped.

[Jessica Kierson]

That's how I did it. I was like, I know how to get this locked down.

[Unknown Comedian]

It locks it down.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

I hope for people. I mean, Jesus. Well, some people, it doesn't, you know. But you knew probably with him that it would lock him down.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

And even though I didn't come from a traditional family and my parents did not get along at all, it was like my worst nightmare to. To divorce with children.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

To have them have that. Yeah, but it's. It's so much worse to stay.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah, I'm sure they're okay.

[Unknown Comedian]

They're okay. You know, it's. They're okay because we make it okay, right? You know, we make it okay. It's. It's what you do with it. Like, we. No matter what problems we've had or how angry we were at each other or anything, they. They don't see that. Like, we just make it okay for them.

[Jessica Kierson]

That's great.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah. It's really good. It's really important.

[Jessica Kierson]

How long do you wait before you tell someone you love them?

[Unknown Comedian]

It really depends on the situation. And I think there's a big difference between loving someone and being in love.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

Very big difference. Like, I love people, you know, but being, like, in love with someone, it's. There's no time on that. For me. It could be two months. It could be a year. You know, it depends on the situation for me.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

I. The relationship that I'm in. When I was dating him, he told me that he loved me. Two weeks in.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

But it was fourth of July, and he was really drunk and was swimming.

[Unknown Comedian]

In a pool, and he was. He like, I love you.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

Oh, yeah. Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

And he just blurted it out, and I took it.

[Unknown Comedian]

Oh, that is so seriously funny.

[Jessica Kierson]

I was like. And he was just out of his mind right time. Right at this pool party. And I. I mean, it was like, I was like, the heart eyes emoji.

[Unknown Comedian]

That's hysterical.

[Jessica Kierson]

I have a boyfriend. And, like. And so I got, like, way in over my head with, like, all these emotions and feelings, and I was just like, oh, my God. And then later that night, I got so serious with him, and I was like, I love you too. And then it made it so awkward, and he was like, yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

Oh, my God. When did you guys say it again? It must have been a little while.

[Jessica Kierson]

It was a little while.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

I really. I really shot him in the face with that one because I. I thought he was. I was like, oh, my God. But this is so genius. You just spit it out when you're drunk, Right?

[Unknown Comedian]

That has to be true, because when you're drunk, it is something that's real courage.

[Jessica Kierson]

You're telling me something that you felt right. I was like. And it's not shocking that it took two weeks to fall in love with me.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

So. Yeah. And then I think it was, like, three months before I like, yeah, it had. Before we said it, like, again. Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

If you know, you know. But that's not Even that long when you just. When you know. You know.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

I mean, it's not something I would say lightly if I didn't. You know, I think some people. But with women, it's different too. I think two women, it's a. It gets. It gets deep quick.

[Jessica Kierson]

Do you like to say it first?

[Unknown Comedian]

No. Who likes to say it first? Maybe some people do.

[Jessica Kierson]

Drunk people.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah, drunk people in a pool on.

[Jessica Kierson]

Fourth of July when they don't really mean it.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

Well, for my last question. What is the sweetest thing you've ever done for someone?

[Unknown Comedian]

Wow. You know, I can be very romantic. I really can. I love doing things for people, like gifts, like romantic kind of things. Thinking of that. You know, I always gave my ex wife dozen flowers, like red flowers, you know, nine red, three white for the kids, like that kind of stuff. Those little, like, thoughtful things. But I think that I really have done. And I used to do more of it before I thought the world was ending, but until people really got crazy. Like it has become crazy with politics, with, you know, Covid, with all this. But I was very kind to people in public. That's like, if someone fell, I was the first run to run to them and help them. If someone couldn't. An old person crossing the street, I would take their hand and cross them. You know, I was skiing and someone fell and I stayed with them until the help. Like, that's the kind of person y. I am. I really. And I want to help people, but it's just the world has made me like, not as quick to do those things because I think people have lost their minds.

[Jessica Kierson]

You're like, are you really hurt?

[Unknown Comedian]

Right. Exactly. Are we really hurting? And stab me on this ski slope. Yeah. I'm serious. Yeah, but that is my. That is my. I became too like that. And then people started taking advantage or I didn't trust people as much.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah. You do kind of have to be careful sometimes.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah. But I have a very big heart that way.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

Well, it's hard to believe you're a Scorpio.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah. I'm not a typical. I am the. I'm intense, but I'm not in certain ways. I'm not a Scorpio.

[Jessica Kierson]

No. Yeah. I like you a lot.

[Unknown Comedian]

I know. You're like, what's going. I hope I don't have the same birthday as your ex.

[Jessica Kierson]

What's your birthday?

[Unknown Comedian]

November 14th.

[Jessica Kierson]

His is the 16th.

[Unknown Comedian]

All right. I made it.

[Jessica Kierson]

And I was with him for seven years.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

So I liked him a lot.

[Unknown Comedian]

I know, but it's there. Yeah. I'm really, I, I, I'm, I am intense and I'm strong and I can, I can get jealous, but not in a sick, crazy way.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

At all.

[Jessica Kierson]

Only people born the 16th.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah. Right, right.

[Jessica Kierson]

Have that.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah. I'm not, I mean, I get jealous. I'm not like, I, I get jealous, but not in like, not in a way that people talk about.

[Jessica Kierson]

With Scorpios, you just have to go to a formal.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah. I just have to have my name tattooed on their face for me to not get jealous.

[Jessica Kierson]

Where can people find you?

[Unknown Comedian]

So My schedule's on jessicakurson.com my, my website. And then I'm, I have a big, big, big following on YouTube. Jessica Kirsten comedy. And I'm big on Tick Tock, which is hilarious. It's hilarious because, like, who would have.

[Jessica Kierson]

Thought that's the most organic way to go viral?

[Unknown Comedian]

I know. It's all been from fans and they love comedy. Love it, love it. They're great. I, I just never thought it would be Tick tock.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

I would get so big on. Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

So I posted my stand up clips on Tick Tock and that's how I found out I wasn't funny.

[Unknown Comedian]

I was like, wow, they're so brutal.

[Jessica Kierson]

Sometimes viral, but like, not in a good way.

[Unknown Comedian]

Oh, really? That happened to you?

[Jessica Kierson]

Of course. People were like, wow, this is awful. And I was like. But then it would get like 40 million hits.

[Unknown Comedian]

That's so amazing.

[Jessica Kierson]

I'm like, thanks.

[Unknown Comedian]

I know. Like, you know what?

[Jessica Kierson]

Watching it.

[Unknown Comedian]

Bad press is good press. I'm serious. The most evil people get with me is on Facebook. The worst comments and Facebook and then YouTube. People are evil on YouTube. I mean, I'm.

[Jessica Kierson]

Facebook is all grandparents and people from your past that no one cares about.

[Unknown Comedian]

Right. But on my fan page, they're just. Fuck, they're evil. Evil.

[Jessica Kierson]

You can't read the comments.

[Unknown Comedian]

I don't, I don't a lot. But sometimes I'll get notifications. So I'll look and I'm. Oh, that was nice. And then I read down. I'm like, oh my God, she should die. Like, what?

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah, people love to say that one.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

So not creative.

[Unknown Comedian]

It's so not.

[Jessica Kierson]

Can we get creative with how I should die?

[Unknown Comedian]

Well, someone did. I did. This is a great story. It's a quick one. I did a video, I used to do these car videos where I would sing and just literally just. And I am telling you, like, I just was blurting out this song and it went viral. I had no idea you know how certain videos, you're like, why did this go viral?

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah.

[Unknown Comedian]

But millions and millions and millions. Like, I can't even imagine what it's at now. I'm not kidding. Like, maybe a hundred. I have no idea. And people, like, some people, it really enraged them that I was singing in a car and someone wrote, I hope. I hope she hits a wall and dies on impact. And it. The last time I checked it, like, five years ago, it had, like, 150,000 likes. So now it should have a million. Yeah. And they really just wanted me to just hit a wall and die in the car. But the likes is what made me laugh so hard, that there were so many. They loved that it was that way. I should die on impact. Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

That's hilarious.

[Unknown Comedian]

Isn't that unbelievable?

[Jessica Kierson]

That's awesome.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah. It's still there somewhere.

[Jessica Kierson]

Yeah. Well, I have to go find it now.

[Unknown Comedian]

You have to find it.

[Jessica Kierson]

Thank you for coming on my show.

[Unknown Comedian]

Thank you for having me. You're great.

[Jessica Kierson]

Thank you. So are you.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yes.

[Jessica Kierson]

I'm so glad you didn't hit a wall.

[Unknown Comedian]

I know. Me too. At least that is the funniest thing that is. That's my new special. I hope you didn't hit a wall. Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

If all of you watching this find that. Please go like that comment, and let's get it up to, like, a million.

[Unknown Comedian]

Yeah, it might be.

[Jessica Kierson]

I'm not gonna be at a million.

[Unknown Comedian]

I hope it is. Yeah.

[Jessica Kierson]

I gotta go look. Well, thank you so much for coming on. Thank you guys so much for tuning in. We will see you next time. First date, baby, are you really drinking a glass of milk with dinner?

[Unknown Comedian]

First day. I can't wait.

[Jessica Kierson]

You told your mom about me?

[Unknown Comedian]

Just say you're ready.

[Jessica Kierson]

Delete my number. Your parents are your roommate.