Ben Gleib on Launching YouTube’s First Late Night Show | Greg Fitzsimmons

Summary

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Fitzdog Radio: Ben Gleib on Launching YouTube’s First Late Night Show (May 21, 2026)

Podcast: Fitzdog Radio
Host: Greg Fitzsimmons
Guest: Ben Gleib
Episode: "Ben Gleib on Launching YouTube’s First Late Night Show"
Date: May 21, 2026

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Episode Overview

This episode features a candid, meandering, and humorous conversation between Greg Fitzsimmons and comedian/host Ben Gleib, focused on Ben's ambitious new venture: YouTube's first-ever traditional late night talk show, Good Night with Ben Gleib. The episode blends showbiz war stories, reflections on late-night TV, personal anecdotes, relationship insights, Middle East politics, behind-the-scenes details on Ben's project, and trademark comedic banter.

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Key Topics and Insights

1. Catching Up: Comedy Roots and Career Milestones (07:05–14:10)

• Chelsea Lately and Comic Pay

  • Greg and Ben reminisce about their frequent panelist stints on Chelsea Lately.
    • “We made less than $50,000. Less than 25,000. We made $450.” — Ben (07:35)
  • No residuals, self-written material, and miserable pay for panel work.

• Game Show War Stories

  • Ben hosted the Emmy-nominated Idiot Test on Game Show Network, which moved to Pluto TV and previously to Netflix.
    • “My house is the house the idiots built, as I call it.” — Ben (10:43)
  • Greg jokes about their game show host parallel: Greg hosted Idiot Savants.

• Ben’s Home and Parties

  • Ben talks about his valley home (bought for $645,000, now valued at $1.3M–1.5M), large parties, and Nikki Glaser footing the bill for his last bash.
  • Gentle ribbing about his "staff" of 27 for the new show.

2. Family & Politics: Touching on Roots and the Middle East (14:10–20:35)

• Family Background

  • Ben’s father was a real estate broker and later a luggage/rug salesman.
  • His mother stays active with swimming and book clubs. Ben jokes about being too busy to visit.

• Middle East Discussion

  • Candid, open chat about the Israel-Palestine conflict, family connections to Israel, and the difficulty of “solving” or even debating the issue.
    • “We’re humanists, man. We want everybody to be free and treated equally and want the hatred to stop.” — Ben (14:22)

• Negotiating with Extremism

  • Ben shares a story about his uncle, an Israeli minister, negotiating during the Oslo accords:
    • “We will agree to nothing but 100% of what our demands are because Allah decrees that we get this.” ... “Oh, that's good to know. I certainly am not going to argue with God.” — Ben (19:43)

3. Life, Relationships, and Grooming Humor (22:00–27:32)

• Romantic History and Preferences

  • Ben is now happily in love, moving in with his girlfriend (age 40, he's nearly 48). Past relationships with younger women didn’t work for him—he jokes about why.
    • “I just think most people are really bad at communication. And a lot of women I've dated, like, are not committed to seeing a conversation or conflict through to the end.” — Ben (24:37)
  • The hosts riff on dating age gaps, attraction, and honesty in relationships.

• Notable Relationship Quotes:

  • “I was dating a lot younger women. I hated it...Why would you want that?” — Ben (22:41)
  • “I wasn't choosing people that would, like, elevate me. I was choosing people that I felt like were safe and, like, would feel almost like, real happy or lucky to be with me.” — Ben (25:21)

• Grooming Techniques

  • Fun sidebar about maintaining perfect stubble and hair, revealing their vanity and camaraderie.

4. Ben Gleib’s New Late Night Show: Good Night (27:32–39:45)

• Show Announcement and Structure

  • Good Night with Ben Gleib is YouTube’s first late night show, launching with 2.9 million subscribers (inherited/rebranded from Collab’s existing audience base).
    • “Partnered with my friends, the McFadden brothers...So we collabed together and they gave me this channel.” — Ben (28:57)
  • The show features both celebrities and thought leaders—biohackers, experts, entrepreneurs—emphasizing usefulness over pure celebrity culture.

• Studio & Format Innovations

  • Filmed in Ben's house, with a live audience of friends and virtual attendees beamed in via a massive video wall—paid tickets provide access (a new revenue model).
    • “It's the first worldwide studio audience ever...People can buy a ticket to be on our walls, camera on, mic on, laughing, applauding, interacting.” — Ben (37:21)
  • Post-show afterparties “à la Playboy After Dark,” streamed from around the house.

• Production Details

  • Budget of $1.5 million, with notable backers like Nikki Glaser and Scott Galloway.
  • Writing team consists of both up-and-comers and big names (e.g. Mike Lawrence), but leans on cost-effective contributions rather than a full-time room.

• Upcoming Guests

  • Scheduled: Bob Odenkirk, Tiffany Haddish, Craig Robinson, Sophia Bush, Jeff Ross, Adam Ray, Aisha Tyler, Andrew Huberman, and more.

Notable Quotes:

• “Late night is over...Five white guys within five years age of each other...This is why Late night is over.” — Greg (30:23)
• “That's why I'm creating one as a straight white male who's not far in age from them.” — Ben (30:26)
• “We're trying to reinvent the game by bringing value to people's lives with our bookings instead of it just being celebrity culture.” — Ben (36:06)

5. Industry Talk: Late Night, Roast Culture & Comedy Trends (39:45–42:01)

• Roast of Kevin Hart & Modern Comedy

  • Ben critiques modern roast formats (“just say the worst thing possible”) and reminisces about the wild, unfiltered Chelsea Lately years.

• Late-Night Wars

  • Ben jokes about “starting a war” with John Oliver, critiquing his delivery and writing formula.
    • “Why does he open every episode like a baby in a high chair getting his mash coming? Welcome, welcome, welcome. Just banging his hands on the table like a petulant child. But a lot of respect.” — Ben (31:47)

• Show Business Connections

  • Cameo phone guest: Annie Lederman, as Greg and Ben banter about show invites.

6. Wild Showbiz Anecdotes & Sexual Misadventures (52:09–61:26)

• Famous Exes Reality Show Story

  • Ben tells the story of having four ex-girlfriends compete on a game show—including host Courtney Hansen and other notable exes.

• Chelsea Handler Anecdote

  • An awkward yet hilarious memory about “almost” making out, then being outed on Chelsea Lately’s national monologue.
    • “Can you please promise me that you're not going to tell anybody I asked you to make out with me?...That's not going to happen.” — Ben & Chelsea, relayed by Ben (54:14–55:24)

• Celebrity Party Fails

  • Ben’s “almost” hookup with Eva Longoria at Jane Fonda’s Illuminati-like party—ultimately cockblocked by Barbra Streisand.
    • “I get cockblocked by Barbra Streisand. Like, is always the case. Like the legendary cockblock.” — Ben (59:47)
  • Flirting with Sally Field, star-studded moments with Quincy Jones, Lily Tomlin, and Bill Maher.

7. Philosophy, Aging & Priorities (62:34–66:36)

• Work-Life Balance

  • Discussion of career vs. family, referencing Ben Stiller’s documentary about his parents and the sacrifices made in showbiz.
    • “I never understood that. That desire to put your work in front of your family.” — Greg (64:00)

• Personal Finance and Real Estate

  • Both discuss homeownership, inheritance, and financial security as comedians.
  • Ben and Greg share how their parents helped them buy homes, and how they've provided for family.

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Memorable Moments & Quotes (w/ Timestamps)

• On Having a Staff:
  • “Ben Gleib is not that successful. He's a marginal character who somehow has a staff...Which means either he's saving no money, he's taking everything he makes.” — Greg (08:04)
• On Peace in the Middle East:
  • “We're humanists, man. We want everybody to be free and treated equally and want the hatred to stop.” — Ben (14:22)
• On Making a Move on Chelsea Handler:
  • “We should make out. And I see her think about it for a second...And then she shakes it off, she's like, no, no, I don't think we should.” — Ben (53:54)
• On Eva Longoria:
  • “I get cockblocked by Barbra Streisand. Like the legendary cockblock.” — Ben (59:47)
• On Launching Good Night:
  • “We're gonna be doing in person stuff, interviews, trying to reinvent the game by like bringing value to people's lives with our bookings instead of it just being celebrity culture.” — Ben (36:06)
• On Post-Show Vibes:
  • “The camera follows me into the rest of the house and it becomes this like, playboy after dark. Dive deeper with our guests, cocktails, joints.” — Ben (38:40)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• Chelsea Lately Days & Pay (07:04–09:50)
• Game Show Careers (09:55–11:11)
• Family & Real Estate (11:12–13:16)
• Middle East Conversation (14:10–20:35)
• Romantic History, Relationships (22:00–27:32)
• Show Details: Good Night (27:32–39:45)
• Late Night Industry/John Oliver Critique (30:57–32:18)
• Virtual Audience & Studio Mechanics (36:58–39:45)
• Celebrity Guests & Booking (33:30–34:43; 36:36–36:49)
• Showbiz Anecdotes (Chelsea/Longoria) (52:09–61:26)
• Reflections on Work/Family Balancing (62:34–64:35)

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Conclusion & Outlook

Ben Gleib’s ambitious Good Night aims to break the mold of stale, celebrity-driven late night by combining comedy, expert panels, and audience interactivity—offering an experiment in digital TV-era innovation with the irreverence and heartfelt curiosity Fitzdog Radio fans have come to love. The episode delivers behind-the-curtain insight on entertainment, relationships, and the realities of making something new, all filtered through Greg and Ben’s sharp comedic lens.

To attend a taping (virtually or in person):
makeitagoodnight.com
New episodes Thursdays at 10pm ET / 7pm PT on YouTube.

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Transcript

[A]

Foreign.

[B]

Welcome to Fitz Dog Radio. I'm in a different studio today because my other studio is under construction for a week. We'll be back in that studio next week, but this one and Harlan Williams, which we're taping tomorrow, will be in this studio. What's it called? So we want to thank Bass Hole Podcast Studios here in Hollywood for their graciously having me in this past week. I had an experience I want to share with you just quickly, and then we'll get into this Ben Gleb interview that we just did. That was very fun. So a friend of mine named Dave Halanan, I've lived in the same neighborhood for 25 years, and I've gotten to be very close to a bunch of guys, and we play poker together and go to beach volleyball on Sundays. And anyway, one of us, Dave Hallinan, great guy with two young kids, lived three doors down from us, was a camera guy. And he would finish a production. He'd be away for a few months, and he'd come home, and the first thing he would always do is he would go take a solo hike somewhere. Kind of adventurous guy, and he would camp out, and it was his way of kind of clearing his head after working his ass off. So he went on a hike like that and went down a trail, and he got to a little lagoon, and he stepped into it, and it was very slippery, and it fed into a waterfall, and he went over the top and he didn't make it. So unbelievably tragic. Really hard on everybody, obviously, his wife and kids. So every year we go back to that trail, and in his honor, we walk the hike. So we did it. This year was the 10th anniversary, so there was about nine of us. And we headed up there in a couple cars and we met at the trailhead. It was supposed to be 68 degrees. It was 90 degrees. And one of our friends named Josh was wearing heavy jeans, wouldn't wear a hat, hadn't hydrated. We get about a mile up a steep hill. It's up in the. In the sequoias, and there's a river running next to it that is the steepest river in North America. Did I already talk about this on the show? I can't remember if I did. He doesn't think so. So, anyway, we get a mile up the hill, and Josh, our friend Josh, is collapsed on the ground. One guy is holding him up from behind. He's vomited all over himself. He's lost consciousness. He's trembling. And one of our guys Matt just immediately sprints. He runs down the hill to get help. There's no WI FI service, There's no cell service at all. Runs down the hill and he gets the park rangers and the paramedics and he comes running back up the hill a mile. It's 90 degrees out. He's got armfuls of water. His shirt is dripping, red face. This guy's 62 years old. And I should point out, like, I'm the youngest one out of this group and I just turned 60 and one guy's 72. And so it was ill advised that we even left on this hike. But more ill advised to wear fucking jeans and not drink water. So the paramedics get up there and they put an iv, two IV drips in him and he regains consciousness. Anyway, long story, like, if it wasn't for Matt, I think Josh would have died. It was like that intense. And just to think that on the 10 and we had Dave's son Owen with us, who's 26, and he wanted to come on this hike with us and that we would have lost another guy in the group on the 10th anniversary on the same trail was kind of mind blowing. So anyway, came down the hill, Everybody's fine, he's fine. And when they. There's a crazy thing where if you have SOS on your phone, you can dial 911 and you can. It tells you which direction to aim your phone to get satellite connection, which one guy did. But what he didn't realize is when you call 911, it transcribes the call and sends it to your emergency contact, which this did. So now his emergency contact is his wife who gets this transcript and it says that Josh could be dying on the mountain. And she goes and tells Josh's wife and gets my wife. And the three of them are sitting in their kitchen. All they know is he's dying on a mountain and they need help. And so they didn't hear for like an hour that everything was okay. So that was crazy. And so I don't know if the hike continues. Do we continue to honor him? Do we suck it up and just train more and be more prepared and maybe go during January instead of May? And I think maybe. Maybe a shorter. Maybe a shorter hike. And I'm realizing, like, I can't do everything I used to do. I have on a. I have on a back brace right now because I ran a 5K. A 5 fucking K made me have to go to the chiropractor and try to steal Opiates from friends. Maybe that didn't have anything to do with the back pain, but I. But I. It's over. It's over. Anyway, see me while I'm still alive. I'll be in Boston at the Laugh Boston Comedy Club, May 29th and 30th, Rochester, New Hampshire, at the Opera House, June 5th. A Gunquit, Maine at Jonathan's, July 12th. Then I'll be in St. Pete's for the Joke World Festival, August 14th 15. Also coming to Cincinnati and Columbus at The Funny Bones, August 26th and 27th. Then I'll be in La Jolla. Check Fitzdog. Com, get some tickets, come out and say hello and thank you also to my guest. And here he is now, Mr. Ben Gleb.

[A]

All right.

[B]

Ben Gleave is my guest. Ben and I go back. I've known you. Were you ever in the New York scene?

[A]

Yeah, I mean, I go do stand up in New York.

[B]

No, but you weren't. But you weren't located. So I guess I've known you since I've been out in la.

[A]

Yeah, mostly since Chelsea lately. Days.

[B]

Yeah, Chelsea lately. We used to come on as panelists. You did it, I think, 100 times. I probably did. It

[A]

take longer to come up with this number.

[B]

I don't want to say 100. I would say 50. I probably did it 50 times.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

One of our means we made less than $50,000.

[A]

Less than 25,000. We made $450.

[B]

The pay was awful. I don't think there was residuals.

[A]

I know. Once in a blue for like some international buyout.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Extra $400 check or something. Yeah. Not a lot.

[B]

And you had to write your own material, perform it, get yourself there.

[A]

Oh, fuck. I'm so sorry. The security company's calling me again.

[B]

He Ben Glebe. Just so you know. I'll cover why you do this.

[A]

Thank you so much.

[B]

Ben Gleb is. Has, in his words, a staff. His staff at his house. Which is mind blowing because Ben Glebe is not that successful. He's a marginal character who somehow has a staff, which means either he's saving no money, he's taking everything he makes.

[A]

Listening through that, and you called me a marginal character. I'm pretty sure is what I heard.

[B]

Well, I'm just trying to highlight that you having a staff.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Feels. Feels like a lot.

[A]

A lot of people said that to Moses and his staff. And look how he ended up dead in a desert Greg, alone and joke of the podcast. That's correct. Not even Allowed into the promised land. That's me.

[B]

Walk me through the. The cat, the cast, the staff. Yeah.

[A]

We have, like 27 people working on the show. It's insane. It's insane.

[B]

All right, so we're burying the lead. Ben is a very successful host. Over the years, he's been nominated for two Emmys.

[A]

That's not accurate, but I'll go with that. My game show was nominated, but I was not. But I'm associate, you know, I'm the host of the Emmy nominated show.

[B]

Well, there you go.

[A]

That counts. You won an Emmy, so it's a little different.

[B]

I won four.

[A]

No, really, the bio that. That my publicist sent me is one.

[B]

Grabbed it from 2004, but they're daytime Emmys, so I don't count them as real Emmys.

[A]

Four counts as one.

[B]

Four. If you melt down four, you can make one. And then I actually won a cable Ace award for a game show that I hosted, which was. It was on mtv. It was called Idiot Savants. We did two.

[A]

And mine's Idiot test Game shows. We were very similar.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

We're at game shows, game show hosts.

[B]

Yeah. But it's really like. It doesn't mean anything, but it's nice to be nominated.

[A]

It is.

[B]

So. And you've also. And your show on the Game Show Network lasted a while.

[A]

I mean, it's still on. It's on Pluto TV now. It's never left the air. It was on Game show network for four seasons. 210 episodes debuted two weeks before Chelsea Lately ended. So that was nice timing. Then Netflix acquired it, and it was the second game show ever on Netflix after Jeopardy. And then now it's on Pluto tv, and I see zero pennies for either of those acquisitions.

[B]

Well, off the air, we're going to talk about the Game Show Network executives.

[A]

I love them.

[B]

Now you don't.

[A]

On the air.

[B]

I love them on the air.

[A]

No, I do love them. They've been great to me.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I mean, they're not having me back on the air for many years since the show ended, doing new episodes. But I love them. Yeah, they've been very nice to me.

[B]

Good.

[A]

I was the star of their network for years. I can't be upset about that.

[B]

Did they pay you a lot of money or.

[A]

Yeah, my house was. My house is the house the idiots built, as I call it. So. Yeah, they. They. Not the executives, the contestants.

[B]

It must be nice because they keep trying to rob it. I mean, why?

[A]

I know. During the damn thing.

[B]

Wait, your house is big enough to hold 27 people.

[A]

Big House is big enough to hold 127 people. Yeah. You haven't. Never. I've invited you to all my birthday parties on Red Tech. Unresponded to texts, but I have 150 to 200 people in my house for parties.

[B]

Really?

[A]

Yeah. Nikki paid for the last party at my house and. Nikki Glaser.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

There's only one Nikki really, in our world, right?

[B]

Yep.

[A]

And then. And yeah, we have like. I have 300 people come to these parties throughout the evening.

[B]

There's Nikki. Oh no, there's another, there's another Glazer. There's Alana Glazer, Ilana Glazer. But there's only one Nikki.

[A]

Yeah. Eliza Schlesinger is another one. We're just talking about female comics now?

[B]

I guess so. Judy Gold.

[A]

Duty Gold. Yep. The sideburns.

[B]

So what part of town is it in?

[A]

It's in the Valley.

[B]

How much did you pay for it?

[A]

Back when I bought it, 645 000.

[B]

Get out of here.

[A]

Now. It's like a 1.3 million dollar house. At least.

[B]

Amazing.

[A]

Yeah. My dad, my late dad gave me the advice to buy that house we found in the newspaper. I saw this huge bay window overlooking a huge pool. I was like, this might be the place.

[B]

Well, your dad was late. What? Seeing the house when you were looking at it.

[A]

It's no longer alive. Oh, I thought you meant he was

[B]

late to seeing the house.

[A]

My late dad. Your late dad found it when he was alive.

[B]

Was he often not on time? Wouldn't that be ironic? It was if your father died and he was always late.

[A]

It was the opposite actually. He was always on time and like, look what life did. It didn't even pay him back.

[B]

Why now he's successful?

[A]

No, he was, but I just, I

[B]

mean he's being his moniker.

[A]

Always on time and now he's late. It's like all that time putting in the. Being on the clock and then. That's why I'm always late. I'm going to live forever.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. My father was always early. He was one of those guys, like on time is late.

[A]

My dad was just right on time, I like to say mostly.

[B]

What did he do?

[A]

He was a real estate broker, property manager. And then in his later years before retirement was a luggage salesman and rug salesman.

[B]

Really?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So did he ever buy real estate along the way?

[A]

A little bit. It was more his father, my grandfather like would buy the properties and my dad would like manage them, but my dad had a piece in one or two of them.

[B]

So then your dad inherited the property from his dad?

[A]

Yeah, I don't even think that's the case. I think the business was liquidated, and then, you know, maybe there was a little bit of inheritance, but not too much.

[B]

Is your mom still around? Yeah, she's on time, baby.

[A]

She's very early, actually.

[B]

Always early, Mom?

[A]

Yep.

[B]

So what does she do with her time now? She's retired, I assume.

[A]

She's retired. She lives nine minutes away from me in a beautiful apartment complex we found for her. And she swims every day and she goes to a book club I found for her and a discussion group weekly. And another thing.

[B]

Gotta keep the mind going at the time.

[A]

Keep the mind going. Yeah. But she does stay home and watch a lot of tv, too, and sit on the chair. So I'm trying to convert her.

[B]

Is it a retirement community?

[A]

No, it's just, like, a beautiful building. She has, like, a great young neighbor across the street in her 40s that comes over for coffee.

[B]

Nice.

[A]

It's lovely.

[B]

I love that.

[A]

It's really good that she has neighbors like that because I don't make the time to see her. So somebody has to do it.

[B]

You can't do it.

[A]

I've got 27 people. And of course I'm joking. I love my mom so much.

[B]

You hire her to be the 28th person. She could come in your house?

[A]

Yes. She could cook for me, like, officially.

[B]

Is she a good cook?

[A]

Amazing.

[B]

Jewish?

[A]

Yeah. Israeli? No.

[B]

How is she feeling about everything that's going on in Israel right now?

[A]

I mean, it's just a shit show in every way possible. We have family there, too.

[B]

She anti Palestinian Deeply.

[A]

I'm kidding. No, not at all. We're humanists, man. We want everybody to be free and treated equally and want the hatred to stop. And so as soon as the hatred stops, we can maybe have a chance of peace over there.

[B]

Right.

[A]

It's a tragic war on both sides. Very messed up.

[B]

It's very hard because I grew up in New York, my wife's Jewish. And so growing up in New York, you know, we got the New York Times delivered every day. And I mean, growing up in the 70s, you know, Israel was in the news every fucking day.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And I remember reading that book by Leon Uris about the foundations of his Exodus. Exodus. And I still feel like I am so short of. There's such a knowledge deficit for me. And so I don't weigh in heavily on this stuff. And then I see people now that are new to the game. Knew nothing about and still don't. And they are so passionate one way or the other. You know, Allison Rosen is very pro Israel in the war, very outspoken about it. And we don't talk about it because when people are that strong willed about it, I'm either gonna have to go along with them 100% or feel like I don't have the information to counter what they're saying.

[A]

Sure.

[B]

So I just leave it alone.

[A]

Sure. You don't read a lot or what is it?

[B]

I do read. Well, I do read a lot, but, you know, it's like, it's. It's really a lot because what era are we talking about? You know, are we talking about, like, YouTube fucking Moses? Are we talking about the Jews that have been pushed around the world forever?

[A]

All of it, I think. But I also think it also, like, most important is, like, the modern era. And, like, people try to use a lot of past stuff and it's like, okay, but, like, you know, my only thought on that is, like, the Native Americans were treated pretty horribly in America and kicked off their land. And I think that's much more black and white than, like, in Israel. Like, the Jews were there for a very long time, obviously biblical times, even back then, and then were pushed out and left and came back. But ignoring all that, let's say it was just the same as Native Americans in America. They were literally just undisputably, indisputably as well, kicked off the land. And like, they're not still launching rockets into mainland US Outside the reservations. And still at some point you have to just say, history has changed, the geography has changed, and let's make peace now and not forever. Try to keep relitigating and try to keep killing to get land back that is now long gone and is not coming back. So I think I certainly did not plan to talk about Israel, Palestine, this podcast, but. But I think my opinion is, like, this war has been brutal. Israel's been, like, you know, very aggressive, and it's been very, very tragic. But also it is in response to, like, the worst attack since the Holocaust of Jews. And it's still, still to this day, if you ask a lot of Palestinians, can, if you want your own state, can you now acknowledge Israel's right to exist and have their own state? Because they're the ones have to give you your state. And you can't possibly ask for a state from people who you don't acknowledge one to. And they still won't say it. They'll still say no, there's no way. We need our original land back. And it's like, then you'll just never have peace. Because Israel obviously isn't going anywhere. It's a major nation.

[B]

Is the third state solution solution still

[A]

even a possibility now an upstate for the Palestinians? Yeah, it is if Hamas can be taken out of power and it is if the Palestinian people can make peace with the fact that Israel isn't going anywhere and that the only path to peace. And it's not like it's theoretical. A lot of Israel's former foes are now their allies. Egypt was obviously quite at odds in many wars with Israel. They made a peace agreement and they are complete buddies.

[B]

And peace.

[A]

No, Egypt.

[B]

Oh, Egypt.

[A]

But also the Saudis are normalizing.

[B]

They're normaling. Yeah. As well.

[A]

And Jordan, you know, has. Also has peace agreements, generally speaking with Israel. So it's not like there's not precedent. It's like you make a peace agreement, you make peace with it.

[B]

God, there's so many moving parts. And then you see our country's response to it all is with a sledgehammer. There's no finesse, there's no layered response. And it's always been. Somebody described the Middle east politics to me once as it's like a mobile. There's pieces dangling at different angles. Nothing looks even. But if you pull one piece out, the whole thing will collapse.

[A]

And there's literally children in control of it, just batting it around from under, just like fucking with it. Like world leaders that are just not even mature human beings. So the mobile analogy is apt. But also just, you know,

[B]

I had

[A]

not thought about it. I don't remember it. Oh, I do. I do remember it. Which is, you know, another. Another interesting story about it, I think also is just what certainly doesn't work is religious fanaticism.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You cannot negotiate with that. And the example of it is my uncle Shmulik. Shmulik.

[B]

Great.

[A]

I know it's not the world's most Shmulig. Brenner.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

My mom's brother in law was one of the high up environmental ministers in the Israeli government during the Oslo accords.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

And he said to the prime minister, he had a proposal. So the prime minister put him in charge of negotiating the environmental and water pact with the Palestinian delegation during the Oslo Accords. And they sit down on the first day of the negotiations and the Palestinian delegation says to my uncle's team, we will agree to nothing but 100% of what our demands are because Allah decrees that we get this. And my uncle Said, oh, oh, that's good to know. I certainly am not going to argue with God. So we can't negotiate. So negotiations are over. And they walked away from the table. Three days later, the Palestinians came back and said, okay, we're willing to negotiate.

[B]

We talked to God.

[A]

Yeah, we talked to God.

[B]

Misunderstanding.

[A]

Yeah. So they sat back down. My uncle said, I'm so glad that God changed his mind. And they made an agreement and it stands to this day for sharing wider.

[B]

And a follow up question to this. Do you think you will have more access to pussy hosting this new show? And are you grooming in a different way based on that?

[A]

Well, before I answer that, can I just share a quick recap of what happened here? I don't think you've told people what the show is. We started, we talked about a staff, my alarm went off, and then we talked about your Emmys and then the Middle east war, and I don't think people know what the show is.

[B]

Are you critiquing the flow of my podcast?

[A]

Yeah. I mean, if you like it that way. I'm just saying. You're asking, do I have access, new access to pussy, new level. And I don't know that people don't know what they're talking about.

[B]

I have adhd.

[A]

I was trying to help you.

[B]

I have adhd. I scribble down a few things.

[A]

I get it.

[B]

But I try to be in the moment. I try to honor the truth of the moment.

[A]

Flow of the moment, sure.

[B]

And the flow of the moment was I was looking at your hair and I was so jealous that at this age you have. Has there been any.0. Of any implants?

[A]

No. And in fact, my hair started to go gray years ago and it reversed itself. This is just natural black hair. I'm 47 years old, almost 48.

[B]

It's great.

[A]

Thank you. I remember you and I once bonded, at least. What made me feel really close to you over hair before at Chelsea lately? One day. Because I guess you liked that I always had, like, the right amount of stubble.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And you asked me for how do I keep my stubble? I said, let's talk after the episode. And we met in my dressing room and I told you my grooming techniques.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And did it. You have great stubble now for like decades since.

[B]

Not bad.

[A]

Not bad at all.

[B]

Except mine is gray.

[A]

Mine's starting to get gray on the stomach.

[B]

Yeah. No, it's not bad. It's not bad. Are you single?

[A]

No. So I'm grooming. Nothing.

[B]

Married?

[A]

No. I have an incredible new girlfriend. For the last six months. And it's love of my life. She's moving in with me literally this Saturday. And my show debuts this and the Thursday after. A few days after missing.

[B]

She knows what she's doing.

[A]

Yeah. Locking it in right before.

[B]

I would wait. I always wait for the first quarter results on the ratings before moving in. If I was to.

[A]

Oh, I thought you were gonna say on the other side. I should wait. But you're saying she should judge and hold off. I get hurtful.

[B]

Well, how old is she?

[A]

40.

[B]

And you're how old? 47.

[A]

Turning 48 in a month.

[B]

That sounds very appropriate.

[A]

Thanks. It was age appropriate. One in years. I was dating a lot younger women. I hated it. My girlfriend might hear this. I hated dating younger women. Why would you want that?

[B]

What was the youngest that you dated?

[A]

When I turned 40 or 39. Ish. My girlfriend was 25. So that's. That's the difference in age there. 14 years. Are you single? No.

[B]

You're married for 26 years.

[A]

Okay, so you're about ready to venture out.

[B]

But she's 25 years old. Wow. Yeah.

[A]

Interesting. You've been dating her since very young.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That's cool to get them early, dude.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Lock it up.

[B]

She looks good. Her body looks good.

[A]

I bet. Finally hit adolescence.

[B]

Yeah. I mean, it's weird when that hair grows in. You're like, what? Who is this? Who are you anymore?

[A]

You've changed.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Why are you doing this to me? I know, I get that.

[B]

I mean, I remember back on the island, it was just playing in the sandbox and. Let me ask you this, please. Have you been married?

[A]

No, I've been engaged.

[B]

What's the longest you're with somebody?

[A]

Four and a half years.

[B]

Why do you think that is that

[A]

you know, Are you saying that's long or not long?

[B]

Saying it's not long.

[A]

Well, compared to you. But I mean, choices early and never questioned it.

[B]

Well, no, I have not questioned it. I really have not. Like there has never been a day. And I'm being honest with you. I'm a guy that has a hard time with commitments, career wise. I mean, this podcast I've been doing for 16 years, but I have not one moment of my life question whether or not I wanted to break up with my wife. It's just the one great, perfect thing.

[A]

Good for you. That's cool.

[B]

But what do you think it is? Because you're a nice guy. You're dressed down, you're seemingly rational. I don't know what you're like when you lose your temper or whatever. But what do you think it is that kept you from having a longer relationship in your life?

[A]

I really think it's that I have. I'm, like, pretty picky when it comes down to it. And like, some things, Things seem great in the beginning. And then like most, I'm not to put all the blame off myself. I'm sure I'm not easy to get along with because I'm so particular. But also, I just think most people are really bad at communication. And a lot of women I've dated, like, are not committed to, like, seeing a conversation or conflict through to the end. And so they. They just bail out of a conversation. I get nuts. I get pissed off. I'm like, how can you, like, end this conversation? We're about to. Oh, and I finally made the point that you can't respond to now. The conversation needs to be tabled till tomorrow.

[B]

It sounds like it was a debate strategy with you and them, though. Do you feel like maybe you were too cerebral about how you interacted with them?

[A]

Yeah. And probably too, like, intense about it. Like, you need to be able to also let people communicate in their style a bit. And that hasn't been my strong suit historically, so I think it's that. And I also think I've talked to my girl about this. I've also, for whatever reason, I had some sort of an insecurity, I think, when it. Where it came to who I would be choosing as partners, like, all respecting my past partners. But sometimes they just, like, assuming they're not gonna listen to this or even if they do, whatever, it's over. I just think I wasn't choosing people at my level. I wasn't choosing people that would, like, elevate me. I was choosing people that I felt like were safe and, like, would feel almost like, real happy or lucky to be with me. And so, like, in my mind, there wasn't as much of a chance they would leave at some point.

[B]

Were looks a distraction? Do you feel like maybe you leaned too much on the looks?

[A]

Maybe. Except my current girlfriend is stunning beyond belief. So.

[B]

Pictures?

[A]

Yep, hundred percent.

[B]

Has she ever sent you nude photos?

[A]

I wouldn't say she'd send me full. Oh, yeah? Yes. Yeah, I think so.

[B]

Let's pull those up real quick.

[A]

I got a whole album here. You can look at it. Just don't show it to the camera, though. Okay. I'm not gonna show you the news, obviously, but here is. And make sure there's nothing too crazy in here yet. There you Go.

[B]

The body in it.

[A]

Okay, well, first I'll just show you the last one, which is the body that she just posted publicly on our Instagram so we can.

[B]

My God.

[A]

And then I'll take you to the top of the album and you can

[B]

produce that, like a 34B cup.

[A]

I don't know the answer to that, but she's one of the most stunning.

[B]

Oh, my. She's the one in the middle.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Wouldn't matter. All three. Look at this.

[A]

I know. And she's one of the most intelligent, amazing, accomplished, caring, funny.

[B]

She looks like she has a little Middle Eastern in her.

[A]

No, she's Indian.

[B]

Is that the Middle East?

[A]

I don't think so. And she's. She's from Barbados, so she has this like, island accent. It's like British. British island accent.

[B]

Oh, my gosh.

[A]

PR firm, which is like, next level.

[B]

She has her own PR firm called Shift Media.

[A]

Represent Louis Vuitton and F1.

[B]

She works hard.

[A]

She works very. We have our startups together. My show that remains to be named, and her PR company, which has been named. I've plugged her more than myself. And I bet you have plugged. You're damn right. And. And we just work all day together and like, on our own businesses.

[B]

But is it tough? Like, if you guys want to go out to dinner, is one of you, like, on call?

[A]

It is hard. We'll push it from 8 to 8:30 to 9 to 9:15. We're walking in. We're like the last people in the restaurant. But then we decompress for the meal and we have.

[B]

What about making love? Does that happen at the end of the night? Or do you guys have to slot it in during the day?

[A]

End of the night? I would say often times, and then, like, occasionally, you know, top of the day.

[B]

But when you say often times, I

[A]

mean, we're both having a very healthy. Without revealing too much, a very healthy life between us. But now that I, as you say, apropos accurately, I don't know the word, but have a staff the last few weeks. A lot harder. Yeah, A lot harder to sneak away since there's a lot of people in the house.

[B]

I know.

[A]

I've made my home, my office and my studio.

[B]

Oh, my God, what a mistake.

[A]

I know, but it saves a lot of money.

[B]

Yeah, I know, but that's because you're just starting. Once the show's up and running, you're gonna get some production offices after two seasons.

[A]

But. But the studio's in my house as well.

[B]

What's the budget on this show.

[A]

So it's the first late night show for YouTube. I'll just say that for now it's called Good Night.

[B]

Okay, let's talk about that now. Let me set it up properly.

[A]

Sure.

[B]

The show is called Good Night with Ben Glebe G L E I B and it's YouTube's first ever late night show. And it's on the Ben Glebe Goodnight YouTube channel.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Goodnight, which has 2.9 million subscribers. How is that possible? The show just started. How does it affect so many?

[A]

Correct. Because I partnered with my friends, the McFadden brothers, the co CEOs of Collab. We've been making viral videos together for like decades, literally. And they built up these channels for comedy videos. So we collabed together and. And they gave me this channel and we have been working together to launch it and rebrand the channel.

[B]

I mean, if you got 2.9 million views, that would dwarf.

[A]

I know.

[B]

All the other late night shows, they get less than a million.

[A]

I know. We're trying to reawaken the channel. So.

[B]

Right.

[A]

Right now we don't have anywhere near that. But we're also. Haven't debuted yet. We're just releasing little teaser videos and stuff. So we're hoping to reignite that audience really soon. But so there's that. Yeah.

[B]

So exciting.

[A]

It's really exciting. And we have a world.

[B]

They're all going away. I mean, yeah. Colbert is gone. Kimmel's not going to be around much longer.

[A]

Our show starts one week after Colbert leaves the air. We drop our first episode on YouTube at 10 Eastern on the 28th. Thursday. The 28th. And Colbert's gone this Thursday, I think.

[B]

Who's going to be the final guest on his show?

[A]

I don't know the answer to that. I don't think John Stewart will appear. I bet you maybe.

[B]

Yeah, that would make sense. That would make sense. I.

[A]

And then probably all the hosts just came on so they won't come back.

[B]

I saw that episode and I got to tell you something, you know, it's. It's just five. Five white guys within five years age of each other.

[A]

Right.

[B]

They've all got on dark blue suits with white shirts and dark ties.

[A]

Right.

[B]

Their hairstyle is all exactly the same.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

They're all married with kids. Straight.

[A]

Right.

[B]

And you just go, this is why Late night is over.

[A]

Yeah. That's why I'm creating one as a straight white male who's not far in age from them.

[B]

And your hair is exactly the same as that.

[A]

Thank you so much. If you have a purple jacket, like a kind of like a maroon jacket.

[B]

Maroon jacket. That's the key.

[A]

Maroon fly. You know what I mean? This. Oh, no, none of them are Jewish. John St. He wasn't even one of those five. I don't even know why they have John Oliver in that group. He's not a late night host either. Confusing. All the rest are. Late night host. Then you have John Oliver, which does very. It feels very strident. Angry news rants once a week.

[B]

Do you not like his show?

[A]

I used to like it. I don't really like it very much anymore, to be honest. I do still watch the first like seven minutes.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And I've never gotten through his 25 minute rant about charter schools today. Charter schools. I'm like, I don't give a fuck about charter schools for a three minute segment, let alone 25 minutes about them. I like. That's the one problem with themed episodes. Like almost never. Are you going to strike on a topic that I'm interested on your whim to dive in for 25 minutes on one topic?

[B]

People have short attention spans.

[A]

Yeah, I can't do it. I just. It's always something. It's like, I get your staff did a lot of research about why local prisons have the most corrupt number of people running. Yeah, I'm sure it's true.

[B]

I see what you're doing. You're jumping into late night and you're taking on the big dog. The guy that wins all the Emmys. Throwing down the gauntlet. Now start the war.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Get some press.

[A]

Also, all respect, he's funny, but like, why does he open every episode like a baby in a high chair getting his mash coming? Welcome, welcome, welcome. Just banging his hands on the table like a petulant child. But a lot of respect.

[B]

I love John Oliver, but like Conan o', Brien, I respect the material more than the delivery. Like Conan o' Brien, I think is brilliant, but I cannot sit through the fidgety nervousness. It makes me uncomfortable. And it's not why I'm watching TV late at night.

[A]

Right. And also, like, again, I don't know why I am starting this war with John Oliver. But also I just like figured out the formula of his writer's style on that show. And it's almost entirely always just like really strident, very like over woke points that just have little side jokes with a side character that he makes up to make the joke. So he's like. And it's ridiculous that you're doing this. It's like the guy in class that's always like, trying to say, all right, Johnny, we get it. Johnny.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

Who's this fake guy you're talking to on the side?

[B]

Although Johnny, to his credit, I think he was the first one to say, you know, and here. Here's Donald Trump, the original Chef Boyardee with the blah, blah, blah.

[A]

Yep.

[B]

Yeah. Now everybody does that device.

[A]

Yep. True. I gave him credit for that.

[B]

That was. That was a good little. I like that little.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Recipe for a joke.

[A]

Yeah. When you. When you touch Trump in the stomach, though, he goes, hoo hoo, and then just bombs people. I don't know why those two are correlated, but he does that.

[B]

Wait, I said Chef Boy D, and you went with this Pillsbury Doughboy, right? Yes, I did, but that's what's gonna make your show different.

[A]

Yeah, we just, like, mix metaphors.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Like, no one's gonna make your show

[B]

different because I see your list of guests. First of all, unbelievable star power. You got the Black Eyed Peas, Keith Harris as the band leader, music director.

[A]

Yep.

[B]

Nikki Glaser and Scott Galloway are backers. Does that mean financially?

[A]

Yeah, I've raised the whole money for this show.

[B]

How much did you raise?

[A]

$1.5 million.

[B]

My God. How much did Nikki give?

[A]

Can't say.

[B]

Bob Odenkirk will be on. Tiffany Haddish, Craig Robinson, Sophia Bush. Who's that?

[A]

Big. Very big actress. One Tree Hill, huge podcast the last few years.

[B]

Jeff Ross. How'd you get him?

[A]

Very hard to get Jeff, but he's a dear friend of both of us.

[B]

Adam Ray. What character will Adam come on as?

[A]

I hope he comes on as Dr. Phil or as the. The. The. The gay mentalist or as the kid with acne. Or as Adam Ray. One of the. One of them.

[B]

Aisha Tyler.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

What's she been up to lately?

[A]

Directing a lot of stuff.

[B]

No kidding.

[A]

For years. Yeah.

[B]

So talented.

[A]

So good. Andrew Huberman's coming on. It's not even listed there or really announced. Some breaking news for you here.

[B]

He's good. I can watch him.

[A]

That's one of the main.

[B]

I like him, but there's. The Internet is overrun with guys that are absolutely, positively, definitively giving you the truth. There's no room for debate. There's no alternate take. This is how it is.

[A]

That's right.

[B]

And they're so eloquent that you go, yep, okay.

[A]

Yeah. I mean, that's the way, I guess you build a following is by having the answers, not by being Uncertain. Maybe that's what our problem is. We're too nuanced, Craig.

[B]

Well, we're curious. I mean, look at all the questions I've asked you.

[A]

I know. I would be asking you questions too,

[B]

if it was your show.

[A]

Correct.

[B]

Are you inviting me on your show?

[A]

Yep. I would love to have you on

[B]

the show if you would have asked already.

[A]

No, we're going to have you on the show. Not in the first three episodes.

[B]

Your voice just went up like an eye. Well, we're going to have you on, Craig.

[A]

We're going to have you on the show.

[B]

What character should I play when I come on?

[A]

I'd love you to play Dr. Phil if you can. Could you be Adam Ray as doctor?

[B]

I could be a Boston cab driver.

[A]

Yeah, that'd be great.

[B]

Okay. That'll be our running thing.

[A]

Oh, good. Okay.

[B]

That actually would be kind of funny.

[A]

I love that. Actually, you're gonna have the same hat.

[B]

Are you gonna do like a Letterman thing where you get like. Remember he had Chris Elliott coming on as a man lived under the stairs. Have you thought about getting like, little characters like that?

[A]

Yeah, we thought about it. It's not gonna be our first move because we're trying not to, like, do like, like sticky characters. We're gonna be doing in person stuff, interviews, trying to reinvent the game by like bringing value to people's lives with our bookings instead of it just being celebrity culture. Late nights usually been. So we're book celebrities on each episode. And also like a thought leader, change maker, entrepreneur, expert, biohacker, relationship expert.

[B]

So late night show that's funny, but has a heart.

[A]

Totally try to really help people's lives. And also it's much richer for me to make comedy out of instead of like just joking with like Chris Hemsworth for the thousandth time. Like, is the hammer still heavy on the Thor films? Now I get to talk about, like relationships and biohacking and exercise. You know what I mean? Like, there's so much more to make.

[B]

It is. I like that. Are you gonna have like, like a. A space where people are gonna do demonstrations and learn things about demonstration?

[A]

We're talking about some science guy. But like, babe, we do have a stage where we can do that. But then the other unique thing. So we're gonna also be doing like pre tapes, like, but more like hidden cameras and mount the street things rather than sketches too often. We will do sketches occasionally. But then also another twist. It's the first ever late night show where the audience is really truly part of the Show. It's the first worldwide studio audience ever. So we have huge video walls in the studio, like 20ft of video walls. People can buy a ticket to be one of our revenue streams, to be on the walls with us, camera on, mic on, laughing, applauding, interacting with me in crowd segments.

[B]

Well, that's like when during the pandemic. I remember I did one of your shows where there was a. There was virtual audience.

[A]

Yeah. Nowhere comedy is powering now. It's Nowhere Studios is powering the virtual audience for this show. So my other company's doing that and.

[B]

But then you'll also have a live studio.

[A]

Correct, but that's just curated friends and guests. It's in my home, so I don't want like the public.

[B]

It's in your home.

[A]

We built this incredible late night studio in my home. So it's just 20 seats in the studio and then another 20 to 30 overflow in our overflow living room area. And then when the second the episode ends, the post show is all around the house. So I invite the audience to stay with us. If you buy a virtual ticket, you can be on the walls. If you buy a VIP virtual ticket,

[B]

you can be drinking. There's alcohol.

[A]

Exactly. And you can be seeing live the post show.

[B]

Do you think people will, on occasion make love in like a guest room? Yeah, 100% closet. I'm sure.

[A]

Probably already happened last night. No, no. I'm showing you the studio. This is the studio. But even before we finish the build. But this is our late night studio. Essentially what it looks like.

[B]

I wish your goddamn girlfriend's cleavage was in the studio.

[A]

Well, you can flip back to that album if you need to.

[B]

That looks amazing. I love that.

[A]

And so when the show ends, the camera follows me into the rest of the house and it becomes this like, playboy after dark. Dive deeper with our guests, cocktails, joints. Last night in our test episode, we all are just giving you an example, Right. We just had a test EP and we had great guests. Just help us test the show. It was Jay Washington and Nick Alexander and prominent neuroscientist friend of mine, Dr. David Rock. And then just in the audience of our 19 seats was Emily Morse. Sex with Emily. Yeah, Sex with Emily literally teaches the master class.

[B]

Flirting with me once.

[A]

Yeah, she's one.

[B]

She exudes a lot of sexuality.

[A]

Does indeed. And so then, great feet. She's hot in every way. And we. I don't know if I've seen her feet, but we flow through the whole rest of the house. And then it's this vibe. It's this vibe in the ashram. So last night, post show, we're smoking a joint in the ashram with Emily and she's holding court, talking about people's kinks and the craziest things she's heard from her clients. And that literally was just even in our test. So I think the post show will even be more unique than the main show. And anybody in the world listening to this can get a ticket to see that live and to be on our walls. @makeitagoodnight.com you just buy a ticket and you're on.

[B]

Do you have a writing staff?

[A]

We got people contributing. So part of the way I'm trying to do it cost efficiently is I don't have a lot of full time writers.

[B]

Right.

[A]

But I have amazing young writers. Writer, graduate from Harvard. Caroline Choi is amazing. We're going to be getting contributions from people like J. Chris Newberg. Mike Lawrence is contributing as one of the greats.

[B]

Mike Lawrence, one of the greats. He just wrote on this roast of Kevin. What'd you think of the Roast of Kevin Hart?

[A]

I thought it was really interesting. I thought the roasts are maybe getting a little too, like, formulaically just like, say the worst thing possible. And clearly the people don't really know each other anymore and they're just trying to be like racist and hurtful without, like great jokes behind them. Yeah, but I thought it was. I think it's fun that we have a place we can just be nuts. Like back in Chelsea lightly days. We could say anything. It was like a roast every night.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And you could like actually actively sexually harass and make racist Letterman.

[B]

Let's get her on.

[A]

Oh, nice. I've been talking to Annie on the phone all the time lately.

[B]

Hey, Annie, I'm doing my podcast with. Hold on. I'm doing my podcast with Ben Glebe. He's sitting right here. Are you getting a word in edgewise? Well, we talked about Israel and I really just had to sit back and listen to that junk.

[A]

You brought it up.

[B]

It's just these Zionists are out of control.

[A]

Greg brought it up.

[B]

Annie, I'm gonna listen to Candace Owens. Just.

[A]

You're a big Candace Owens fan. The more anti Semitic and Nazi like she gets the. The more you buy in.

[B]

No, I liked when she was talking about Blake Lively and Justin Baldoni.

[A]

Yeah, that's not her main wheelhouse.

[B]

Do you believe that Ben's got a new show? Good night with Ben Gleb. Do you believe Annie Letterman will be invited to be A guest on.

[A]

And he already is invited before you were. That's great.

[B]

I know. I haven't been invited.

[A]

And he's one of our guests that we already cleared before. This is last night. Emily in our ashram.

[B]

He did this kind of half assed guilt invite once. We were already.

[A]

No, my voice got high and nervous. But we're gonna have Greg on. Yeah.

[B]

Maybe Annie and I can be on the same episode.

[A]

I would love that.

[B]

It wasn't guilt. It was guilt. Hanukkah felt the fish.

[A]

That's correct. Annie and I have become extra close lately. We talk on the phone like once a week.

[B]

Amazing. I love that Bengali. But is this recorded? Don't tell people.

[A]

Yeah, no, this is recorded. Obviously our conversations are full of hate.

[B]

All right, Annie, I gotta go. I love you guys. Love you.

[A]

I love you too. Bye.

[B]

Bye. Yeah, Annie will be a good guy.

[A]

Take his jacket off.

[B]

It was actually too. Can you turn the AC up? When I came in, it was freezing and I asked him to turn the AC down. I didn't realize you're going to show up in a. In a rayon jacket.

[A]

I mean, you're wearing a sweater. A sweatshirt.

[B]

Yeah, but because I've got a back brace on and I'm trying to hide it.

[A]

Your back's hurting?

[B]

Well, I did a thing where I ran a 5k when I don't run, so I didn't train. I just ran it. And then I was doing pretty preacher curls. You know what preacher curls are?

[A]

Sure.

[B]

And that really affects the lower back on top of it. And so.

[A]

And I don't know what they are, but I just wanted to say yes because I didn't want you to have to describe what a curl is.

[B]

It's just a bench. You put your armpits on and then you curl with your arms down.

[A]

My arms look good on those.

[B]

Yeah, they do.

[A]

Your arms don't really look like that.

[B]

But it pops out every muscle.

[A]

I hold it up there, I'm like, God, I finally looked like this.

[B]

I know. It's like when you put a balloon under your balls.

[A]

Mm. Sorry.

[B]

Just a small balloon. Oh, just this little balloon just props things up a little bit.

[A]

Oh, like a helium filled balloon.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

You're sitting on. It's just the right amount of pressure that it feels good. But you're not popping it.

[B]

Well, once you pop it, then it. Then it drops. And if. And, but. But then now it's fluffed.

[A]

Oh, it stays fluffed.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That's nice. Does the pop hurt?

[B]

Penis guy like you doing pretty Good down there. Really?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You smiled when you said that, so I believe it's true.

[A]

Thank you. Do you have a good one?

[B]

I actually have a very large one.

[A]

Oh, good to know.

[B]

It's kind of infamous in the industry. I can't believe you never heard that.

[A]

No, I never heard that.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Milton Berle obviously had the legendary giant one. And it's a funny thing. One time. I don't know how funny it is, but you know Gloria Allred, the famous women's rights attorney? No, but one time she sat down at my booth at the dnc. I was covering the DNC for npr, and she sits down in my booth to, like, rest. And somehow we get to talking about. She's like, oh, you're a comedian. Milton Berle used to make me sit on it or tell me to sit on his lap and, like, flirt with me and whisper in my ear and say the things that. That. And she's like, always sues people for discrimination and, like, sexual harassment. And she's like. And she'd whisper all the things he wanted to do to me. Why did I let him get away with that again? Oh, yeah, yeah. Because I didn't work for him, literally. She was trying to remember why she didn't sue him for that.

[B]

That's good. I never saw his penis, but I was a member of the Friars Club in New York.

[A]

Oh, it's the LA Club for me.

[B]

And that steam room was famous. All those old borscht belt.

[A]

Were you looking at all the dicks to try to see? Can't not.

[B]

They would like.

[A]

You ever see Dangerfield stick his.

[B]

No, I didn't see Danger Feels. I did see Hannah Youngman's.

[A]

Oh, interesting.

[B]

And I mean, look at that.

[A]

Take my. Please.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

That's the way he would ask people.

[B]

He. He. Instead of the violin, he used to play his.

[A]

In the steam room. That's right.

[B]

And you know, at that age, everyone's. Well, everybody's as big at that age because it's just drooping. It's.

[A]

Well, you don't count the balls in the size of a dick.

[B]

I think it's a race between the balls and the. And the tip which gets lower.

[A]

The tip starts drooping. I don't think that's real.

[B]

Oh, you don't think a penis gets lower?

[A]

That means it gets longer.

[B]

Let me show you.

[A]

Okay. Please. Yeah. Why? To crush my dreams. Crush a young man's dreams.

[B]

So you debated Charlie Kirk.

[A]

I did.

[B]

And kind of famously brought up an aborted fetus. And he showed a picture of a dolphin fetus.

[A]

I said, do you truly believe this is a human being? And he goes, yes. I go, he goes, without a doubt? I go, without a doubt. Give him an out. And he goes, yes. And I go, that's a dolphin fetus, Charlie. And it's gone viral like a hundred times.

[B]

And what did he say?

[A]

He just was like caught completely off guard. He looked very. He looked at the camera. He's like, is this thing recording? Yeah, yeah, it was like. It's one of the great memes, one of the great owns, I think.

[B]

Congratulations on that.

[A]

I mean, I felt better about it up to like eight months ago, you know.

[B]

Did he get you any gotcha moments that he got you on?

[A]

Nope. I mean we debated for an hour and 20 and after he passed, you know, very sad what happened to him. Somebody made like a super cut of like, that's the famous one. But like I owned him like 20 times in that debate. Somebody made like a super cut of the 20 times I own him in a debate and he did not own me once even for a second. And I actually got him to storm off his own set at the end because I kind of called him out for having ginned up January 6th and he did not like that. And he stole. He like helped kind of encourage that insurrection to a degree, to my mind.

[B]

What do you think now about Trump giving $1.7 billion to the insurrectionists?

[A]

When do you.

[B]

Oh, you are so out of the news cycle.

[A]

I've been working around the clock.

[B]

This is the most egregious abuse of power maybe in the history of the United States. So much worse than Watergate or fucking Hunter Biden's laptop. Trump has now taken $1.7 billion of taxpayers money and he has put together a five person commission selected by him and can be replaced by him at any time. And their job is to allocate this money to people that have grievances against the governments, mostly January 6th rioters.

[A]

Really? Yes, he is flip flopped pub. I don't understand like, if anything like, like Trump, I guess I get it, can be convincing, but how do his followers like follow along for all of the flip flops on issues like egregiously, like first it was encouraging people to do the insurrection, then on that day he's like, you have to stop, we love you but you got to stop. And they leave. And then he was said, they're horrible, what they're going to do, we're going to prosecute them. And they said you're going to pardon them. Before his term ended. And he was like, never, I'm not going to pardon them. Then he ends his term, he's like, records a song with them.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And then he's going to pardon them. Then he comes back in office, does pardon them, but then it's. It's like, how do people go with. Well, because.

[B]

Because his base is shrinking, but they're getting stronger. So he is kowtowing to this.

[A]

The opposite of an old dick, which is getting larger but weaker.

[B]

Interesting point. Yeah, it's true. It's like when you see an old guy driving like a Lamborghini and you're like, come on, man.

[A]

Like you're doing it, but no one is really, like, blown away by this.

[B]

It's a better car. Driver is weaker. Right?

[A]

Yep.

[B]

You ever take Blue Chew or any kind of. Like, have you experimented with those pills?

[A]

No.

[B]

Never once. I don't believe you look down and away when you said.

[A]

Because in one. I did for one instance. But. But generally speaking, no, I have not. Here's the why. I said that I was dating somebody where I was not getting turned on a lot. So I thought about it. Yeah.

[B]

So you blame her.

[A]

I don't want to blame her. Lack of chemistry. Lack of chemistry. But. But my theory here, at least maybe. I'm. I'm sure people have like a straight up dysfunction where they need it, but if you're really attracted to somebody, it's not going to be an issue. And then you're like, mildly attracted or not. So then maybe you need aids. But I'm sure with age, maybe that changes. I don't know. Are you a big Blue Chew guy?

[B]

So you need aids?

[A]

Age?

[B]

Oh, I thought you said aids.

[A]

No, I said aids. I guess it aids.

[B]

Am I a Blue Chew guy? Well, they sponsored my podcast for a while, Blue Chew, because if you have aids, then really nobody's getting off.

[A]

That's true these days. I mean, it's really like we have the cure, basically.

[B]

Oh, I just heard a breakthrough the other day that they've like really got something.

[A]

Really?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Well, that's another whole separate thing is like, the news never gives us a day to celebrate.

[B]

I know.

[A]

Like, it was always AIDS epidemic. AIDS gonna kill you. And then I saw like commercials in the last year where they're like, there's now one pill that suppresses it to undetect, undetectable levels in your body. And another thing that makes it. You can't transmit it. That those combined, literally is a cure. And we never had the news day being like, cure For AIDS we never got.

[B]

The problem is because USA doesn't exist any longer, those pills won't be going to the people that need them. Which is in Africa where AIDS are still rampant.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And parts of Asia.

[A]

Yeah. U.S. u.S. Aid led leads to u. S. AIDS.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

That's what it is.

[B]

Make that the clip for this week.

[A]

Clip it. People love a good AIDS visualization.

[B]

You did a game show and famously. I keep saying famously as if, like, I love this.

[A]

You're framing me like a star, but give me a kiss. Larry's. Larry can make us. I have a lock on my. Remember he made out with Larry King in the interview. Larry King interviewed me. He did not kiss me on the lips.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I'm hoping for you and I today, right now kiss on the lips. Not really. Now that I thought about it, I thought about it and I thought, like there's a lot of big table between us and. Yeah. I gotta explain it to my girlfriend. Although actually be good for me because it might give me leeway with females.

[B]

I feel like ever since I had a. He said I had a huge. You've been like looking a little more into it.

[A]

Yeah, a little bit. I'm like more interested. Yeah, Yeah, I get that.

[B]

You famously did a game show where you had four of your ex girlfriends on competing against each other. Who were they? Any comedians?

[A]

No, but a famous TV host is one of them.

[B]

What's her name?

[A]

Courtney Hansen. You know her, she's the car girl. She was the host of overhauling and all these car shows. Ride of your life now. She was tomboy. I'm gonna brag. No, not at all. She was one of FHM's Hundred Sexiest Women in the world. She was on the COVID of it while we were dating.

[B]

Really real breasts or impressed? Real.

[A]

And like one of most stunning human being. Second only to my current girlfriend.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Gorgeous human being. And then the other was my ex Rome apple. Lovely human being artist. The other was my ex, Danielle Sepulveris, author and stand in for Julian Amargules on the Good, Good wife. And then. And then the fourth, the fourth one on that show was my ex girlfriend, Jasmine Chelsea Handler, who was. Who was a park.

[B]

Did you ever flirt with Chelsea Handler?

[A]

Flirt, sure.

[B]

Did she flirt back?

[A]

We became like really, really close friends in the last season of the show. Yeah, we would like to spend whole weekends together. We would like sometimes sleep in bed together. Like we were very close.

[B]

But you never kissed her.

[A]

Never kissed her.

[B]

But did she ever. And be honest about this.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Did she ever Grab your ass. No, I don't believe that's true. She scraped my ass all the time.

[A]

Really?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Maybe she thought you were cute.

[B]

I don't know backstage.

[A]

She would not do that to me. No, we would like be in quite intimate quarters. So she certainly had the chance to do it.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But a very funny moment of that. So there's only one time where I in fact did make a move on her. I have the clip actually on my phone if you want me to pull it up for the punchline of this. It's pretty funny.

[B]

Now put your phone down.

[A]

Great. So only if it's hot pictures of my current girlfriend. Do you want the phone out? Yes, I get that. So we were in Vegas. I don't know if you were there on that trip, but she flew her whole staff and I just asked if I could come. I wasn't her staff, but she was headlining Vegas. She flew us on her jet to Vegas just to party all weekend. Nice and a great time. She headlines like Caesar's palace or whatever. And then the last night, it was just she and I and her suite. At the end of the night, everybody had gone to sleep and it was often just two of us alone at night and we're playing some game like in close quarters at like her desk in the corner of the suite. I was like, let's try to remember everybody we interacted with this weekend and make a list. So we're like a foot from each other and I'm a little drunk and a little high, you know. And so for the first time I actually felt this like little bit of like sexual tension in my mind at least. And I'm like an inch from her face. So I just looked her and I go, we should make out. And I see her think about it for a second. To my memory, there was a moment where she was turned on by me saying that and it was like, ooh. And then she shakes it off, she's like, no, no, I don't think we should. And she'll for sure deny the attracted part in that moment. But the rest for sure happened. And she's, I don't think we should. I'm like, why not? It'll be fun. And she goes, I just don't think we should. It'll mess up our friendship and there's just no point. I'm like, okay, fine, it's 3:30 in the morning, so I'm gonna go to sleep now. I get up to leave, she goes, what? You're not gonna spend the night? And I Go, I'm not gonna sleep with you in bed after you just rejected me. I'm very embarrassed. This is very uncomfortable. She's like, come on, come on. We can watch that sexy movie you wanted to watch on the pay per view. And I'm like, I don't even have a toothbrush here. She's like, use my toothbrush.

[B]

I'm like, oh, my God.

[A]

So I use her toothbrush. We get in bed, right? And she's like, stay up. I'm like, I'm going to sleep, Chelsea, if you want. I was, like, pissed and, like, butthurt. I'm like, if you want to massage me when I'm sleeping, you go ahead. I don't even know why I said that. I'm just like. My point being like, I'm going to fucking sleep. And I go to sleep, I wake back up and I go, chelsea, do me one favor. Can you please promise me that you're not going to tell anybody I asked you to make out with me?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And she goes, that's not going to happen. And I go, fair. Can you at least promise me you won't mention on the show? She goes, that's fair. I can. I can do that. Wake up in the morning, we fly back on the jet the next day. I'm not on Chelsea lately, but I tune in to watch it. Opening monologue. She goes, I went to Vegas this weekend and brought my staff because I enjoy watching people make fools of themselves. Like when Ben Gleb gets very high in edibles and says to me, we should make out. And when I tell Ben no, he goes, why, Chelsea? It'll be fun. And I go, well, it won't be fun for me because I don't want to fucking make out with you. And then Ben says to me, please promise me you won't tell anybody I asked you to make out with me. And I said, that's not gonna happen. And then he says to me, at least promise you won't mention it on the show. And that was the opening monologue.

[B]

Wow. Wow.

[A]

So.

[B]

Well, that's the thing about Chelsea. Is she really. I mean, Kathy Griffin and Joan Rivers did the same thing, which was they were taking you behind the curtain and they were telling about famous interactions, and I think probably burned friendships and relationships along the way.

[A]

I think Kathy's worse at that. I think Chelsea has more discretion. I think she would only do that for her staff or people that, like, were on her show. And it was kind of the agreement.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

She wasn't, like, telling stories about, like, bigger celebrities that she was doing.

[B]

I put Amy Schumer in that group, too, I think. Yeah.

[A]

Kathy Griffin, though, is the worst. Like, Chelsea took me to a party once at Jane Fonda's house for her 75th birthday.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And it was like this insane Illuminati party. And one time, I'm sitting in a circle with Chelsea, Eva Longoria sitting next to me. Penny Marshall, Kathy Griffin. And Kathy literally says to the group, she's like, barbara strikes and. And Sean Penn are here. How do we get in? Do we go causes? Do we go political? How do we do it? I remember Chelsea got mad or something at that party because she promised she wouldn't say something about that party. Then she did. Yeah. That party was nuts. That party was really nuts. I had a chance, that party. I believe in my heart of hearts to hook up with Eva Longoria at that party. Who's the dream? I mean, the dream, one of the most important.

[B]

Why do you think you had a chance?

[A]

I'll tell you. You'll be the judge. And this story ends in a way that it's classic, and I'm sure you've had the same experience. Get ready. It's. Pick it up off the floor real quick.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

So I'm at the party, and I'm flirting all night with Sally Field.

[B]

Oh, my God. Ah, the flying nun.

[A]

She looked incredible. I mean, always had a crush on her.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Remember, like, literally, I just wanted to have sex with Sally Field and then walk out of the bedroom to her son with maybe with special needs standing outside the door and be like, son, yo, yo, mother really cares about your education. Forrest Gump.

[B]

Forrest Gump.

[A]

I remember when. And then he goes, anyway, so Sally Field looked good. She had this little skirt on heels and just looked amazing. And I'm flirting with her at one point upstairs. Me and Sally Field are upstairs at the house. No one's even up there. And Chelsea walks up the stairs, sees me and Sally Field on top of the staircase, and says to America's sweetheart, Sally Field, be careful with this one. He's a lady killer. Made me feel pretty fucking good, right? But then Sally Field, I can tell, is, like, about to maybe leave the party. I gotta make a move soon. And right then, Eva Longoria walks into the party. Little short, black leather dress and, like a see through shawl on top and heels. Looked amazing. And Eva Longoria walks into the kitchen, and I have, like, a choice to make. Do I go for maybe? Maybe. The easier bet. Sally Fields night.

[B]

And what were you wearing? Were you wearing this face.

[A]

I was. I know, I know, dude. This face.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Everybody must have been on drugs. I got a lot of people high at this party, too.

[B]

Okay?

[A]

Smoke pot with Quincy Jones, this party. Anyway, point is, I got Lily Tomlin too high. Anyway, the point is. So I decide to, like, shoot for the stars and go for Eva Longoria, right? So I let Sally Field just leaves the party. Later that night, Shelley tells me I fucked up. And I quote, sally, I happen to know Sally Field hasn't been fucked in a long time and could have been a. So I maybe fucked that up. So I go to the kitchen, and Eva Longoria, across the kitchen, sees me and, like, lights up. I never met her before. Yeah, she waves at me, comes over, starts talking to me. So clearly she's a Chelsea lately fan, Just knew me from the show. We end up sitting in that circle with all those people, and Eva's telling some story, and the story involves someone that touched her leg. And she puts her hand on my thigh and. And rubs my whole upper thigh, really. So I'm like, whoa, whoa, whoa. Like, I never even thought it's possible, really. But, like, obviously in my mind, I wanted to, but I'm like. So I'm like. Is Eva Longoria flirting with me? So I, like, gather all the courage I can, and I say, would you like to take a walk real quick? And she goes, sure, let's go for a walk. And Eva Longoria and I start walking down this long outdoor veranda, like, on the side of the house. The second we're walking, like, a breeze comes by and opens her see through shawl. And she says to me the following sentence. Ben, you're taking my clothes off already. And she said that all of a sudden, I'm like, 100%. She's flirting with me now. I mean, you don't say that if you're, like, fucking around. Maybe you do. Maybe you're just making a joke. I don't know. But my brain, I was like. My confidence just shot through the roof. Now I'm like, now I'm gonna make a move. So my plan is we're gonna go around the corner in private. I'm gonna try to make out with her.

[B]

Sure.

[A]

And make a move. Yeah. And we get to the corner, and we're about to turn the corner. I swear to God, Someone taps Eva on the shoulder and says, I'm so sorry to interrupt you two, but Eva, Barbra Streisand wants to talk to you. And I get cockblocked by Barbra Streisand. Like, is always the case. Like the legendary cockblock Eva, even, like, an hour and a half later.

[B]

Did you think about following it up with her?

[A]

I did follow it up. So an hour and a half later, Eva even excused herself from Barbara came back over to me and said, I'm so sorry, Ben. I'd love to talk to you, but I'm still talking to Barbara. Goes back. End of the night, I'm sitting in a circle. Bill Maher, Jane Fonda, Eva Longoria, Chelsea, and me. I'm real high. At one point, I go sit in Chelsea's lap. And then I was like, I'm really high. And I'm like, damn, your legs are really toned. She goes, ew, are you hitting on me? Go sit back down right there, right now. And humiliates me in front of all these people. And I'm like, chelsea, I wasn't hitting on you. I was just like, I'm high and your leg felt toned. I was just commenting.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And then Eva's about to get. I'm passing my weed pen around. We're all getting stoned, and Bill Maher's like, I don't think these weed pens work, to be honest with you, but I'll hit it anyway. And Eva's about to get up and leave, and I have to ask for her number in front of these icons of the world. I asked for her number, and she goes, oh, Ben, you know I have a boyfriend, right?

[B]

No.

[A]

And I go, oh, no. Yeah, of course. I just meant for, like, lunch. I didn't know she had a boyfriend.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And so she. I'm like. She goes, oh, lunch?

[B]

Sure.

[A]

Here's my number. Gives me a number. I wait six days to call, try to play it real cool. I call, and they pick up, and they see something. The effect of Longoria Productions. And I was like, yeah, even there. Like, she's not in the office this summer.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And that was that.

[B]

I'll tell you, my. My daughter has discovered Desperate Housewives. And so we've been on these binges. It's so good.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

It was such a good show.

[A]

Hatcher and Eva Longoria.

[B]

Terry Hatcher is real. I mean, they all. All really good actors. Great soap opera. And Felicity Huffman is so good.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Who's she married to?

[A]

Is it Bill Williams? Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. I like that couple.

[A]

They look similar.

[B]

All right. Listen.

[A]

Don't they? Yeah, I think so. Both have, like, red hues.

[B]

Red hues.

[A]

Kind of like blondish, reddish hair and, like, kind of have, like, the same jaw.

[B]

Yeah. They were a little puffy faced, a

[A]

little puffy face, similar jaw, like kind of like a triangle.

[B]

That's the Coen Brothers movie.

[A]

Argo, you think?

[B]

I think Raising Arizona, but Fargo is right there.

[A]

Yeah, Yeah. I auditioned once for Coen Brothers movie and I went very stoned and did not do well.

[B]

Do you have a problem with pot?

[A]

No.

[B]

You talk about it a lot.

[A]

No. I did smoke a lot more before and I don't smoke as much anymore. I probably still talk about it a fair amount because I think it's just a fun drug and activates my creativity. But for a while I was making me like. I thought it would make me really in the moment as an actor. And it did, and really subtle. But also I just couldn't remember my lines. I would go in and just like up a couple moments, you know.

[B]

I got a friend who's been an actor for his whole Life. He's probably 70, at least 70. And he got cast in something and couldn't remember his lines. For the first time he realized his mind is starting to slip and he can't act anymore.

[A]

Jeez. Did he get to finish the film and they fed him his lines and couldn't finish. They fired him from it.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Damn, that sucks.

[B]

No, it was a series.

[A]

Oh, series. Well, I remember I went to some taping of maybe a King of Queens a million years ago, and Jerry Stiller was so funny as a sitcom actor, but he just could not remember his line.

[B]

I remember that take after take after that.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I guess that's why he would improvise so much.

[A]

Right.

[B]

Ben Stiller did a great documentary about his parents.

[A]

Oh, I didn't see it.

[B]

Well, you know, still and Stellar and Mara, right?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. And I had no idea how big they were back in the day. And she was the brains of the operation.

[A]

Really.

[B]

As funny as he is, it was all her.

[A]

Ben Stiller is so funny. I love him.

[B]

But not a good dad, admittedly.

[A]

Is that right?

[B]

In the. In the documentary talks about how, oh, Jerry Stiller was. No, both.

[A]

Oh, really?

[B]

He got it from his father. I mean, look.

[A]

Look at his schedule.

[B]

Look how many films Ben has done over the last 20 years while raising little kids, you know?

[A]

Right.

[B]

I never got that. You know, I never understood that. That desire to put your work in front of your family. It doesn't make sense to me.

[A]

Yeah. I mean, but I guess the way you justify it is that's the way you're providing for your family.

[B]

No, that's. Oh, I've provided for my Family and also had balance in my life. I mean my parent, my. I'm not leaving my kids millions and millions of dollars.

[A]

When you get to a certain level, it's like you don't want to like miss the flow of it. Like you need to balance it. You gotta balance it.

[B]

I mean, look, I own my house. I bought my house for 700. It's worth 2.3 million.

[A]

When'd you buy it? What year?

[B]

25 years ago.

[A]

Wow. Wow. Nice.

[B]

I got. It's paid off.

[A]

Nice.

[B]

I got a lot in the bank in my retirement account.

[A]

Do you get money out of the house? Are you able to do like a second mortgage or a reverse mortgage or a loan? You just have that like sitting there as like net worth. But not in the bank though.

[B]

And then I was in the Writers Guild. I've got a pretty big pension from the Writers Guild. That'll kick in in a couple years.

[A]

Nice.

[B]

Social Security. What do I need? My kids are set. Yeah, I mean, they're not gonna. They'll inherit some money, but they'll get the house. They'll always have a place to live.

[A]

Or they can sell it and have a lot of money.

[B]

They keep it, keep real estate. I don't sell it.

[A]

No, you gotta sell it. When my dad passed, we had to sell my parents house. And then we were each able to get a little bit of money to live. I mean, otherwise. Get some money out of it. Yeah, a little bit. Otherwise it just stays forever.

[B]

Did that help you buy the house as well?

[A]

No, I'd already owned the house for 10 years.

[B]

So what'd you do with the money you inherited?

[A]

But it was not a huge chunk of money. My mom just gave a gift to my brother and I. Each 200,000 less something. Oh, maybe in that neighborhood a little bit less. I think it was maybe more like 100 something, that 150. And it's already gone. I mean, it just went to like bills over the course of that next year and a half. You know, maybe there's a little bit of it in stock. It's a little bit.

[B]

You don't have tour dates to plug because you're obviously doing the show. But after the show airs, you're going to be touring. You're going to be drawing like a fucking maze.

[A]

The show is specifically taping on Wednesdays, releasing Thursdays, So I can tour Thursday, Friday, Saturday. And so we'll be back out on the road for sure. And we'll take the show on the road too. But yeah, it's just every Thursday at 10 Eastern, 7 Pacific on YouTube. Oodnight akeitagoodnight is our socials on social media. And if you want to be on in the tapings, you can go to makeitagoodnight.com and buy a ticket and be on the wall. You're welcome. I'll give you a discount code. That's what I meant by being on the show, by the way.

[B]

Oh, now I get it. All right, well, listen, man, I'm very happy for you. I wish you all the best. It sounds like a great concept. You got good people behind you and, you know, I hope you can get to the point where you can move out of your own house and get your life back and get some. Get laid once in a while.

[A]

That'd be very nice.

[B]

My God.

[A]

I. No, it's a shit show over there. Alarms going off, people coming in at 9:30. I don't wake up till 10:30. It's a real problem.

[B]

Pets.

[A]

Yeah, My little dog Henry, he's very barked all night. I'm on zero sleep thanks. Him bark because now my girlfriend's allergic to dogs. So he's been sleeping in bed with me for six years and now he has to sleep out of the bedroom.

[B]

Is that why he's barking? I think Henry's got to hit the fucking pavement. As far as I'm concerned. You got to choose your girlfriend over your daughter.

[A]

He's out of the room.

[B]

How old is he?

[A]

Eight.

[B]

You got eight years left, man.

[A]

Yep. I know. He's got to just make peace with

[B]

the fact that he's not kind of dog, is he?

[A]

Little terrier, 16 pound, rescue puppy.

[B]

And he barks a lot?

[A]

Normally, no. But late the last two nights, he hasn't stopped barking. I had to. Literally, I'd never done this in my life. He had to be outside for the last three hours of the morning. This morning, so I could sleep a little bit. I kept him in the backyard.

[B]

You gotta make some changes at home. Thank you guys for listening. Bl. Blen. That's to be here.

[A]

Keep saying blenn all the. I have a whole bit about this on our premiere.

[B]

Well, you know how they made like when. When it was, you know, they always combine like Ben Jlo and Ben Affleck.

[A]

Would they call it Bennifer?

[B]

Bennifer. But you being a guy who's mostly alone has to combine his own name.

[A]

That's right.

[B]

Blenn.

[A]

Yeah. I don't even know where you're getting.

[B]

It's like your masturbation name, correct?

[A]

Yeah, that's how, you know, it feels like somebody different when you call yourself something different.

[B]

Right?

[A]

My dick is Blend's dick.

[B]

Do you ever shake hands with yourself after you masturbate to make it feel like there was somebody else in the room?

[A]

No. I hug myself so I can feel a little bit held.

[B]

I like it.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Thank you.

[A]

You're welcome. Thanks for having me. Greg. Great to see you.

[B]

Great to see you.

[A]

We'll compare dicks on the way out. Okay, Sam.