RE-RELEASE - Garrett Morris

Summary

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Podcast Summary

Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade

Episode: RE-RELEASE - Garrett Morris
Date: February 25, 2026

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Episode Overview

In this special re-release, Dana Carvey and David Spade welcome original "Saturday Night Live" (SNL) cast member and comedy legend Garrett Morris. The conversation dives into Morris’s formative years, his pivotal role on SNL’s first seasons, stories from the original cast, battles with addiction, and brushes with celebrity legends. With their signature banter and quick wit, Carvey and Spade draw out hilarious anecdotes, raw confessions, and reflections from Morris’s decades-spanning career.

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Key Discussion Points

Early Life and Teaching Background

• Garrett’s stint teaching in correctional facilities
  • “I actually spent a year and a half at what is known as Great Meadows Correctional Facilities. I was a teacher.” (Garrett Morris, 03:15)
• Teaching in NYC (P.S. 71) and working with convicts, including transporting students in a Volkswagen and being falsely suspected of crime.

Run-Ins with the Law—Comedy of Errors

• Spade’s arrest story in Arizona due to his brother impersonating him on speeding tickets (04:34)
• Dana’s childhood shoplifting escapades, with his brothers “stuffing pant stolen items down my pants because I was nine and looked so innocent.” (Dana Carvey, 05:59)
• Garrett sharing “three weekends in the tank” and a time he was framed for marijuana possession by police (06:23–08:13)

Energy, Health, and Age

• Morris’s lively demeanor attributed to “green tea” and managing type 2 diabetes (09:51)
• Dana and David express admiration for Morris’s vibrant energy:
  • “Your energy doesn't match your birth certificate. It's huge.” (Dana Carvey, 10:06)

Comedy and SNL Origins

• Morris sees himself as “an actor who was in a comedy show,” reflecting on public expectations and personal identity (10:45–10:58)
• Describes his journey from theater and Broadway—having written plays and paid his dues in New York—before SNL (12:37–13:02)
• Discusses hurt from Richard Pryor not using him during Pryor’s SNL hosting stint, but later being invited to star in Pryor’s movie Critical Condition as a gesture of goodwill (13:25–13:53)

Working with Legends

• Fond stories about Richard Pryor, including Dana’s hysterical “Denver omelet” anecdote:
  • "Whoever made that omelette can suck my dick." (Richard Pryor, recalled by Dana Carvey, 15:31)
• Stories about Paul Mooney and the influence he had as Pryor’s principal writer (14:03)

Substance Abuse and Recovery

• Honest conversation about cocaine use among the original SNL cast, including John Belushi’s excesses (31:13–33:26)
  • “The thing, that first high, you never get it again…even if you’re on for 35 years, which I was.” (Garrett Morris, 32:57)
• Reflecting on cautionary tales (Len Bias, John Belushi) (33:30–33:55)
• Morris’s journey through recovery and AA, achieving sobriety since 2005 (50:11–50:41)

SNL Early Days: Group Dynamics, Sketches, and Internal Politics

• Joining SNL as a playwright, struggling to adapt to writing short sketches, and losing credit for his "White Guilt Relief Fund" concept due to behind-the-scenes politics (21:31–23:09)
• Friendship circles: gravitated towards Gilda Radner, Jane Curtin, and Chevy Chase, but recounts feeling like an “introvert” and skipping cast parties (27:57; 28:33)
• The afterparty culture and missing out on key “alliance-building” by not socializing as much post-show

Sketch Memories and Iconic Moments

• Favorite sketches:
  • “Colossal President” (37:17)
  • “White Guilt Relief Fund”
  • The O.J. Simpson “Mandingo” sketch
  • Chico Escuela (baseball character originated by Brian Doyle-Murray)
• The “hearing impaired newscaster” devised by Chevy Chase for Garrett
• Reflects on legendary sketches that would be much harder to air in today’s environment—especially the landmark Richard Pryor/Chevy Chase job interview sketch (43:18)

Diversity, Progressivism, and SNL’s Evolution

• Stories of navigating racism in the '70s entertainment business (45:11)
  • Michael O’Donoghue’s hesitance to cast a Black doctor in a sketch, which Morris pointedly challenges (45:11–46:09)
• Discussion about the changing boundaries of comedy, then vs. now
  • “You can't really write for them the way they wrote for us then…I hate that.” (Garrett Morris, 44:12)

Reflections on Music and Influences

• Morris’s musical career:
  • Time with the Harry Belafonte Singers for nine years (56:58)
  • Favorite blues singers: Muddy Waters, Albert King (56:23–56:36)
• Dana shares a charming story about Scatman Crothers and weed in Rockefeller Center (34:46–35:47)

Closing Thoughts—Gratitude and Comedy’s Legacy

• Spade and Carvey express thanks and affection to Morris for paving the way:
  • “We all got a job because of you and the squad up.” (David Spade, 58:19)
• Morris’s humor and wisdom prevail as he riffs on language, mantras, and staying healthy into his 80s.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Substance Use and Comedy:
  • “The thing, that first high, you never get it again…even if you’re on for like 35 years, which I was.” (Garrett Morris, 32:57)
• On Original SNL Cast:
  • “You were part of that original lexicon.” (Dana Carvey, 27:40)
  • “You didn’t stand out as older than anyone.” (David Spade, 42:55)
• On Race and Representation:
  • “He tells me, ‘Well, Gary, the audience might be thrown by a Black doctor.’ Now, this is 1975…" (Garrett Morris, 46:09)
• On Enduring Energy:
  • “Your energy doesn’t match your birth certificate. It’s huge.” (Dana Carvey, 10:06)
• On SNL’s early ensemble:
  • “It must be like the Dirty Dozen…you probably don’t know each other, and you’re thrown together and sort of like, okay, let’s see what works, what doesn’t.” (David Spade, 20:51)
• On Comedy Boundaries Shifting:
  • “You can't really write for them the way they wrote for us then…I hate that.” (Garrett Morris, 44:12)
• On Family Longevity:
  • “My grandfather lived to 92…my mother lived to 80 but she didn’t take care of herself.” (Garrett Morris, 50:51)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 03:05 – Garrett Morris on teaching at Great Meadows Correctional Facility
• 04:34 – Spade’s jail story due to brother’s impersonation
• 05:59 – Dana’s shoplifting as a kid
• 06:23 – Garrett’s marijuana frame-up story
• 10:45 – Garrett on being “an actor who was in a comedy show”
• 13:25 – Hurt over not being used in Pryor’s SNL show, and eventual reconciliation
• 15:31 – Dana’s Richard Pryor “Denver omelet” story
• 21:31 – Garrett details losing credit for the “White Guilt Relief Fund” sketch
• 27:57 – Morris on skipping post-show parties, introversion
• 31:13 – Cocaine culture at SNL, John Belushi stories
• 37:17 – Favorite sketches: Colossal President, Chico Escuela, O.J. Simpson
• 43:18 – The legendary Pryor-Chase job interview sketch, comedy boundaries then and now
• 45:11 – Michael O’Donoghue and resistance to Black representation in sketches
• 50:11 – Garrett’s journey with AA and sobriety
• 56:58 – Life with Harry Belafonte and blues inspirations
• 58:19 – Spade and Carvey’s thanks: “We all got a job because of you and the squad up.”
• 59:34 – Humorous banter about how to end the show—“We don’t want to end with the words, suck my dick.”

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Tone and Dynamics

The spirit of the conversation is playful, self-deprecating, and occasionally irreverent—exactly as fans expect from Spade, Carvey, and Morris. The episode deftly blends showbiz war stories, pointed reflections on race and addiction, and moments of pure comic timing, offering a revealing and often poignant look behind the curtain at SNL’s formative years.

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For the SNL, comedy, and pop-culture aficionado:

• You’ll hear behind-the-scenes tales about formation and frictions of comedy’s most famous show.
• Garrett Morris is candid, irrepressible, and deeply funny—essential listening for fans of SNL's golden era.

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[End of Summary]

Transcript

[David Spade]

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[Garrett Morris]

Yes,

[David Spade]

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[Dana Carvey]

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[David Spade]

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[Dana Carvey]

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[Dana Carvey]

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[David Spade]

Garrett Morris Dana is first season SNL standout. You might not remember him because you're just a young pup, but, but Garrett Morris was. I was very excited to have Garrett on because to have his perspective of being in that whirlwind of the first season.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah, that first five years is sort of the story of snl. He was, he just came to play. He was full of energy and fun laughing and I don't know if it's okay to say so so it's like that or whatever. So I think he might have smoked marijuana for a bit, Mary Jane, but he was really, really funny and full

[David Spade]

of a lot of yeah, happy to be there, like talking and those are the best guests because they come ready to play and they just want to screw around. And we did learn a lot, but we also learned a lot about. That's all we want to do.

[Dana Carvey]

Him and Chevy did some things together. Chevy wrote for him. And, yeah, he did. The interpretive guy was yelling that. From the seventies.

[David Spade]

Hearing impaired podcaster. Yeah.

[Dana Carvey]

But it is really fun. Interview with. With Garrett. I would listen to this.

[David Spade]

Here he is. Garrett Morris. Garrett, you. My last name is Spade.

[Garrett Morris]

You already suited up by having an ex convict on your show. Okay, whoa.

[Dana Carvey]

Let's get down to it. Yeah. Did you serve time? That's. It's my only question.

[Garrett Morris]

I'm not lying. I'm not lying. I actually spent a year and a half at what is known as Great Meadows Correctional Facilities. I was a teacher.

[Dana Carvey]

Oh.

[David Spade]

I was at the Tim Meadows Correctional Facility. Now, Garrett, you were a teacher in there.

[Dana Carvey]

You too.

[David Spade]

Go ahead. Go ahead, Garrett. Let's hear about that.

[Garrett Morris]

Anyway, in, like, 1968-69, I was a school teacher. I taught at P.S. 71 over on the east side. And also they had a program for teaching convicts, and I was a part of it. They gave us a. A Volkswagen, Right? You guys say it's really Volkswagen?

[David Spade]

Okay, everyone's saying it wrong.

[Garrett Morris]

Okay. Anyway, and I didn't know. I was driving along the drug. Drug thing. And I used to get called all the time by the cops.

[David Spade]

Okay, wait, wait. You're running drug. The Volkswagen? And then you got pulled over, and

[Dana Carvey]

you were also teaching kids and running drugs? I don't get.

[Garrett Morris]

I was teaching those murals. Drama.

[Dana Carvey]

Oh, okay.

[Garrett Morris]

Yes.

[Dana Carvey]

You have quite a resume. I look it up. Oh, my God, it's. It's vast.

[David Spade]

You know, Garrett, I have to tell Garrett something. Just so we. We have some common ground here. Garrett. I was in Arizona, you know, running the harsh streets of Scottsdale. And when I was about, you know, 18, 19, I was trying to flirt with this girl leaving a SAE party at Arizona State, and I got pulled over immediately, and they cuffed me and said, you have to go to jail. I don't think. Dana, I didn't tell you this. So I go. I go to jail, and I say, hey, any reason for the jail? You know, I didn't even ask because I just felt I'm pretty guilty about a lot of things. And they said, yeah, you've gotten too many tickets. Speeding tickets, and we have a warrant for your arrest. And I realized they didn't. So a couple hours in, I go, can I see those? And they showed me copies. And it was my brother's signature saying he was me because he got pulled over so much, he would have had to go into jail. So he goes, no, no, I don't have my license. I'M David. And so then he signed them all, and then he still didn't pay them. And then I spent the night in the clink and I had to have another comedian come bail me out.

[Garrett Morris]

Oh, wow.

[Dana Carvey]

Chevy Chase bailed you out?

[David Spade]

I still speak with my brother, unfortunately. But he know I'm such a pussy. I would never really give him any trouble about it. And I didn't.

[Garrett Morris]

Is he out of jail?

[David Spade]

No, I was one out. He never went. I had to do the time for him.

[Dana Carvey]

I had three older brothers that would stuff pant stolen items down my pants because I was 9 and they were 11, 12, 13, and they were all juvenile delinquents. We fought, we smoked, we stole, but they would stuff them down my pants because I look so little and so innocent. And I'd walk out. But yeah, I stole a lot of stuff when I was nine. I'm just putting it out there right now. I would. I stole 10yo yos in one day.

[Garrett Morris]

I've had 3 weekends in the tank myself.

[David Spade]

Okay, See, we're all not soft. We're all from the fucking streets. That's. Let's get that out of the way. Yeah, got it.

[Garrett Morris]

You know, I'm not innocent at all. But one time it was because a traffic cop broke the law and use a slim gym, right, to go into my car. And he looked under the mat in the front seat and found a bag of marijuana, which is illegal cop. Okay, yeah. Anyway, I go to the impound to get my car and I see about four or five cops standing around my car. I'm not stupid. So I wait, right? And they wait about 30 minutes. Okay, let's go get my car. So I go to the car, and I don't go in, and they come and they say, open this back door. I say, no, I'm not opening it.

[David Spade]

Oh, my God, they open it, right?

[Garrett Morris]

And then I was doing my karate thing, right? So I had a gi in the back, yeah. And he said, open that bag. I said, no, sir. They open it. And they had put the grass in the bag.

[Dana Carvey]

Oh, my God, the old frame.

[Garrett Morris]

Yeah, they had company. But anyway, I go downtown and I'm being booked. And sure enough, there was a cop there who was him. He says to me, see John Ianusti now, way back there, John Younusti was a very progressive Italian, a lawyer who was hooked up, right? He would help you out. Sure enough, I went over there. John, you knew to figure out what it was about. He said, just see me Monday. I come in Monday. John whispers something in the judge's ear. And the judge says, garrett Morris, I read my. He said, get out of here. I don't want to see you in here again.

[Dana Carvey]

All right.

[David Spade]

He whispered you were framed, right? That's crazy.

[Garrett Morris]

Well, the lawyer probably told him how the cop got the grave.

[David Spade]

Yeah. No body cams back then, you know?

[Garrett Morris]

How you been doing, man? How you been doing?

[David Spade]

I'm doing good. Me. Me and Dana have been having fun. Look at my hair. Looks good today. You know what happened? I filmed something this week.

[Garrett Morris]

Are you and Dana an item?

[David Spade]

An item?

[Dana Carvey]

An item.

[David Spade]

Are you breaking a story?

[Dana Carvey]

Listen, Garrett, what happens on Fly on the Wall? Jason, Fly on the Wall. Am I canceled? Now, that's. That can't do.

[David Spade]

Yeah, I'm leading the cancel.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah.

[David Spade]

Dana and I are old buddies, and we sort of emerge in the same person over time.

[Garrett Morris]

I must say, you do look like you came from the same mama. You do.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah, same tribe. Irish, Irish, Scottish, Norwegian.

[David Spade]

Yeah.

[Dana Carvey]

What's your tribe? Germany.

[Garrett Morris]

Really?

[Dana Carvey]

I'm Irish, Scottish, Norwegian. Yeah.

[Garrett Morris]

Well, I'm Cambodian, Nigerian, West Africa. And by the way, Ancestry.com said I have a little bit of finish in me. Can you believe that?

[Dana Carvey]

That's interesting.

[David Spade]

It's down deep. Yeah. I can't.

[Dana Carvey]

My skin cries.

[Garrett Morris]

By the way, tomorrow's my birthday.

[David Spade]

Tomorrow's your birthday? I read that your birthday is coming up. Is it the first?

[Garrett Morris]

Is that what it is tomorrow? February 1st? Yes.

[David Spade]

Okay, we'll delete this because this is going to be airing in 2027. No, we don't. We don't know.

[Dana Carvey]

All right, what's your secret? I have to ask. What are you. What are you drinking?

[Garrett Morris]

This here is green tea. Okay, that's it. That's the glucose tea. It helps to reduce your glucose.

[Dana Carvey]

So blood sugar stuff.

[Garrett Morris]

Yeah, I'm type 2 diabetes.

[Dana Carvey]

Your energy doesn't match your birth certificate. It's huge. I mean, you're just, like, on fire. You're just energetic.

[Garrett Morris]

I can't tell you on here, man. This is recorded by Cops. Okay.

[David Spade]

Yeah. They're always monitoring this. I will say, Garrett, you have sort of a very bright light and energy about you and a fun thing about you. And I see why in comedy, you do well, because you always bring it. You're very vocal. You got a strong voice. You just have a fun vibe, and I think that's positive. Yeah, positive.

[Dana Carvey]

People want to work with you.

[Garrett Morris]

So when it comes to comedy, this is what I say. I am an actor who was in a comedy show many, many years ago, and I have been Suffering ever since now.

[Dana Carvey]

Why have you been suffering?

[David Spade]

So are we.

[Garrett Morris]

Everywhere I go, people want me to be funny. And as my ex wife tell you, well, she used to tell me all the time in word, you ain't funny.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah, fill in the blanks. I got it.

[David Spade]

Yeah. Yeah. Well, I think you're funny. And you know, a lot of people have a funny vibe about them. Like people say when I date girls, I go, what do you look for? And I go, I like a girl that's funny, but I don't mean she needs to be Robin Williams. Some girls just have like a charm and fun thing about them. And that's funny to me. And it's a lightness and fun. They don't have to be like, you know, Henny Youngman. Yeah. So I like that. I'll take care of that part.

[Garrett Morris]

Take my wife.

[David Spade]

Exactly.

[Garrett Morris]

Yes.

[David Spade]

But by the way, Dana Garrett has worked with Prior and all these huge, huge stars, which I look over and I can't believe how cool I got

[Dana Carvey]

to work with Richard Pryor. But I want to hear your story first.

[David Spade]

Don't one up.

[Dana Carvey]

I mean, I have a nice Richard story.

[Garrett Morris]

I have a great Richard Price story.

[Dana Carvey]

Okay, I want to hear yours.

[Garrett Morris]

Got to be Richard and I were co fiends.

[Dana Carvey]

That's the title.

[David Spade]

I bet Dana's story doesn't start like that.

[Garrett Morris]

Right. But Richard brought his own group because he had heard that I was Lauren. Nobody had heard about me except you on the East Coast.

[Dana Carvey]

So Richard brought his own writers.

[Garrett Morris]

Nobody knew I got this job with us. Faith in 75 was a pretty good job for a black guy to get. They're thinking, I'm lone Lorn. Help me Michaels.

[Dana Carvey]

Lord Michaels.

[Garrett Morris]

Lord Michaels. N word.

[David Spade]

Can I say, like, you were his main man.

[Dana Carvey]

You can. You can say anything you want as far as I'm concerned.

[Garrett Morris]

Basically thought that was going on, that Richard had gotten. That Lord had gotten some guys who knew. Well, at the time I got to Saturday Night Live, I'd already been in New York for like 17 years. I had written two plays.

[David Spade]

Two plays. Yeah, I read that.

[Garrett Morris]

I've been at 15 off Broadway and Broadway shows. And so I had paid my dues. Right. And they didn't know that. So when Richard came, he brought his own group and he didn't use me. And I was really hurt by that because until this day, Richard is my favorite monologist of all time. Right.

[David Spade]

Yeah.

[Garrett Morris]

And at that time, I was really very hurt because I wanted to work with him. So he did the show, didn't use me. But later on, when I went to California, he was doing a movie called Critical Condition. And I got a call from my agent saying, richard Pryor wants you to be in the show, be in the movie. And he said, anything. I assume that was his way of saying, hey, you know, I'm sorry, or something like that.

[David Spade]

I like it. Yeah.

[Garrett Morris]

Yeah.

[Dana Carvey]

That was very sweet, sensitive.

[David Spade]

Well, you know, a lot of hosts do that. I mean, a lot of hosts still bring in writers just because they get scared. Like maybe Paul Mooney was with Richard. I don't know.

[Dana Carvey]

He was a force of nature, Paul Mooney. I used to do stand up with him in the late 70s, and I would go, why is this guy in this little club? I mean, he was so charismatic and so good looking and so funny. It was like just everything.

[Garrett Morris]

I love Paul Mooney. I'm sure he was behind Richard doing what he did because he was Richard's writer. But, yeah, this day I see. Because much of what Richard did was Paul Mooney. Right.

[Dana Carvey]

Okay, go ahead. What do you think, you know, when you. The idea of a monologist, you know, I think of that more voice orientated. But I think that with Richard, from what, when I first saw him on the Ed Sullivan show, he mimed for two minutes a guy reaching under his underarm to see if he had BO and it was like just a silent movie, you know, so Richard had that capacity to paint a picture instantly and he could do just a straight monologue.

[Garrett Morris]

So, I don't know, he could tell stories like.

[David Spade]

Yeah.

[Dana Carvey]

And play all the characters.

[Garrett Morris]

Yeah, he could talk. When you talk about Mud Bone, you wouldn't be laughing for like two or three minutes till he got to the punchline. Yeah, but you were so engaged in Mudbone until his time, to this day, again. How did you say the word? I said monologous. You say it again.

[Dana Carvey]

Monologist.

[Garrett Morris]

Anyway, sometimes I have trouble with English.

[Dana Carvey]

I knew what you tell my Richard Pryor little story.

[Garrett Morris]

Tell me, tell me.

[Dana Carvey]

Kind of. So I'm working at the Holly Dan as a waiter.

[Garrett Morris]

Yeah.

[Dana Carvey]

And it was near the Circle Star Theater up near San Francisco. Richard's headlining there. So Richard's in the restaurant, so I gotta go serve Richard. And I was really nervous, so I. I brought him up a Denver omelet. Okay. And then later on I came back and I. I took the plate and he looked up at me and said, quote, whoever made that omelette can suck my dick. And I never knew if it was a positive or negative review. 12 years later, I'm in a movie With Richard Pryor, which I'll tell you about. We're at lunch, and I just wanted to know what he meant that day, but I didn't want to bring it up. He probably wouldn't remember. So I look at him, I take a bite of my cheeseburger, and I said, this cheese. This. This cheeseburger is really, really, really good. And he goes, wow. Well, you must want to suck somebody's dick. No, I can't. I got the headline. You got it wrong.

[Garrett Morris]

He used that suck dick metaphor a lot. Guess what? He.

[Dana Carvey]

Okay, so it wasn't just me. Yeah.

[Garrett Morris]

One of the funniest jokes I ever heard was when he said, this bitch was so fine, I want to suck her daddy's dick. I like that one. Yeah.

[David Spade]

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[Dana Carvey]

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[David Spade]

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[Dana Carvey]

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[David Spade]

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[Dana Carvey]

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[David Spade]

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[Dana Carvey]

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[David Spade]

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[Dana Carvey]

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[David Spade]

Okay, do it again.

[Dana Carvey]

He goes, I like, wait a minute. I'm so. I'm so stoned from the dentist.

[Garrett Morris]

The punchline. The punchline.

[Dana Carvey]

You do again. I said. No, I can't. I really can't remember.

[David Spade]

I think you said, this cheeseburger can suck my dick.

[Dana Carvey]

No, no, it was. Yeah, it was a reverse that. I. I got the. The information by setting a trap, you know? Oh. And he and I. I will get to it before this podcast is over. But I am so high right now. I mean, I'm just like. I'm very.

[Garrett Morris]

What kind of marijuana? Marijuana?

[Dana Carvey]

No, it was dental stuff.

[Garrett Morris]

Oh, okay.

[Dana Carvey]

But if I. If I do smoke marijuana, my brand is.

[David Spade]

Sure.

[Dana Carvey]

My brand is Sledgehammer. That's my brand of cannabis.

[David Spade]

Oh, God.

[Garrett Morris]

Your brand of cannabis is what?

[Dana Carvey]

Sledgehammer.

[Garrett Morris]

Sledge.

[David Spade]

From the Peter Gabriel collection. Yeah, I like that name. It sounds cool.

[Dana Carvey]

Shovel to the face.

[Garrett Morris]

I will be smoking again. Okay.

[David Spade]

Hey, Garrett, I have a question for you. You can smoke a joint right now while I ask you if you want. Now, Garrett, when you.

[Garrett Morris]

Okay, bring me a joint.

[David Spade]

Oh, boy. So when you come on snl, it must be like the Dirty Dozen. So you guys all get together. You don't. You probably don't know each other, Right?

[Garrett Morris]

Right.

[David Spade]

And then you are thrown together and you're sort of like, okay, and let's see what works, what doesn't work. And you.

[Garrett Morris]

Oh, you're a writer.

[David Spade]

You're a writer at the beginning, right?

[Garrett Morris]

Yes, I was. Yes.

[David Spade]

Okay, so you weren't. I don't think you're on camera till Later. I think that was a decision that was made later. Correct.

[Garrett Morris]

I actually was on camera the first show. Oh, this. Let me try. Can I?

[David Spade]

Yeah.

[Garrett Morris]

You're in the middle of a story. I don't want to cut you off.

[David Spade]

No way. It's about you.

[Garrett Morris]

I was a playwright, right. So I brought Lorne my play. He read it and liked it because there's a couple of funny things in it. He hired me. I didn't know that. Just because you write a play that's about two hours doesn't mean you can write 30 minutes. 30 seconds.

[David Spade]

Yeah. A little tiny sketch. Yeah, for sure.

[Garrett Morris]

It took me about four or five months to realize I couldn't do it. And I was feeling really pissed off myself till finally I realized I had an idea. Because in my play, the Black Panther group that I have is called the Young Lions, makes a joke about how when they're collecting money at fundraising, they want to raise a lot of money when they have white, guilty. White liberals in the audience.

[Dana Carvey]

I love them.

[Garrett Morris]

Right. So I have to tell that idea. I'm going to call his name to Schiller.

[David Spade]

Oh, Tom Schiller.

[Dana Carvey]

Oh, Tommy Schiller. Yeah.

[Garrett Morris]

Right. Goes over to the studio and tells it to another guy whose name I will not call that guy then writes it down as his idea.

[Dana Carvey]

Whoa, wait a minute.

[Garrett Morris]

Right. When I come over, it's written down, and he's not even giving me credit for even contributing.

[David Spade]

Right.

[Garrett Morris]

So anyway. Anyway, what happened? Am I telling. I'll tell you whole story.

[Dana Carvey]

Anyway.

[Garrett Morris]

Yeah. Anyway, what happened was it became a thing called a White Guilt Relief Fund.

[Dana Carvey]

Yes, I remember the sketch.

[Garrett Morris]

Right.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah.

[Garrett Morris]

And I don't know when I started off to help me, because I'm. I'm 85. I may be all right.

[Dana Carvey]

I'm tracking white people for donations out of guilt and make them an honorary Negro. You'd send them a plaque.

[Garrett Morris]

Anyway, that was the only thing that I did that I thought was worthwhile. And this guy, who at that time was the second in command to Ann Beets, Right. Now, here's what happened was I was so mad. I was so angry about that. Took me a couple of weeks to stew over that. And I was going to make a serious mistake. I was going to come in this particular day and let him know what's for. And even if it meant physically confronting him, I was gonna do that. Although I knew he was a wrestling champ. Now you.

[David Spade]

Oh, I think I know who it is.

[Garrett Morris]

Wrestling camp from Harvard.

[Dana Carvey]

I think I know who it is.

[Garrett Morris]

I didn't care I said, if I get a couple of licks in after he whips my ass, he's still gonna remember me. Right? So I get off to the elevator and somebody there says, garrett, Lorne wants to see you in the green room. I go to the green room, and sure enough, John and Gilda and Jane had told Lorne Michaels, look, you've got Garrett bringing in black actors. He's one himself. And here's a movie he's done. They were looking at Cooley High.

[David Spade]

Oh, Cooley High, Right.

[Garrett Morris]

So Lauren looked at Cooley High. He auditioned me with Gilda, and. And I was totally counterpunchy because Gilda is like Gilda was to this day, unreal. She. How she improvised. You didn't even know she's doing it. And I kind of punched throughout that. It was. I was set up, was. I was a taxi driver driving from JFK with her as my. My passenger, and I was cheating the hell out of her all the way. Right. And so anyway, that's how I became a member of the group. So I was there the first. The first time we did it from the beginning, but I didn't start off that way. No.

[David Spade]

Wow. But how about you turned your anger and you had to switch gears?

[Garrett Morris]

And look, I. I look, I'm a Buddhist, so I don't believe in necessarily in a personal God, but somebody really was in the works who stopped that, because I was going to make a serious, serious mistake.

[David Spade]

Listen, Frankenstein, Franken's got some ground game, too.

[Dana Carvey]

Did you have Go to Moves, Garrett? I mean, how as a fighter would you do the kind of, hey, let's be friends and then headbutt, or would you work the body or what would be your kind of go to moves?

[Garrett Morris]

I've gone to the solar pector first because that would have brought him down, then I would have kicked him in the chin. He's going to get up mad as hell and do some kind of a hole and break my neck. Okay, but. Okay, look, if you're short like I am and don't weigh much, you got to go for what you need to do.

[David Spade]

Yeah.

[Dana Carvey]

You got to get away. You hit fast and then you move, but be scrappy. That was no way to get one in.

[Garrett Morris]

No way I could have won that fight.

[David Spade]

Yeah, no, I know the dude, and he would. He's very tough when he gets in the ground game. I would say. I listen, I got mad at him too, but I didn't. I didn't think of fighting him.

[Dana Carvey]

Decision. Hey, before we go on, can I just do the Richard Pryor joke. We can cut it out. But it really bugged me. All right. I'm so sorry about the dentist, but here it is. I waited. I'll set it up real fast. When Gabe Richard Pryor at Denver Romula is the Holiday Inn. I brought. Got the plate up, and he said, whoever made that omelette can suck my dick 12 years later. True story. In a movie. Wanted to know what he meant by suck my dick. Was it positive or negative? I'm having lunch with him. I take. I take a bite of the cheeseburger. I look at Richard and I say, well, whoever made this cheeseburger can suck my dick. And Richard said, you must love that cheeseburger. That's how you do it. Boom. Dana. I'm making Garrett happy. That's what I love. I never knew I would say suck my dick on this podcast. Now I've said it seven times. That's a mic drop.

[Garrett Morris]

Ladies and gentlemen. What do you have if you have a potato with a penis?

[David Spade]

Excuse me.

[Dana Carvey]

A patinas.

[David Spade]

That's a. Yeah.

[Garrett Morris]

You have a dictator. Stupid.

[David Spade]

Oh, my God.

[Dana Carvey]

Why do you have to add the stupid part?

[David Spade]

Yeah, stupid.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah, it's just. It's a pretty good job.

[David Spade]

No, because you didn't know what it was. Stupid.

[Dana Carvey]

Stupid. I like, the stupid at the end was hilarious. That could have been a guy character. So. So you were part of that original lexicon. I mean, who was your hangout friend of the cast? These are just basic SNL questions.

[David Spade]

So who'd you gravitate to?

[Dana Carvey]

Was it Gilda or just everybody? Or did you have people.

[Garrett Morris]

You, Gilda, Jane and Chevy? But I didn't do what I should have done, because I should have. Also, after the show. After the show, the first couple of years, you go downtown to this bar, I think, Willie.

[Dana Carvey]

Oh, yeah. You have the party.

[Garrett Morris]

Yeah. That's equal to that golf game that people talk about where you form alliances. Right. So I didn't do that. So I really had a lot of people not liking me, thinking I was stuck up and all that.

[David Spade]

Well, yeah. Why didn't you go now? I want to know.

[Garrett Morris]

Because I even to this day, am an introvert working against that. All right. I've really gotten over it to a lot extent. But also I had at that time. Okay, do you want to really know the real truth?

[David Spade]

Go ahead.

[Garrett Morris]

I had probably a couple of girls at home waiting with some cocaine so we could do what we're going to do.

[Dana Carvey]

So it was either the girls and the cocaine or having Lauren tell his Story about how we met.

[David Spade]

Listen, that's a tough one, Dana, because his story sounds great, like all that fun stuff. But then you look back and you realize you've got such huge, talented, cool people that you get to. Because I was going to say, Garrett, did you have an official after party? It sounds like you didn't, but we had. Dana was on, and then I was on with him for a while. And we had. They would walk around with a ticket, a secret, you know, during the show. Remember this, Dana?

[Dana Carvey]

And they'd hand you it, and you

[David Spade]

put it in your wardrobe or something. You go, here's where the party is. Don't tell anyone. And it was during the live show. So you go, okay. And then after the show, you'd go straight there. But they didn't want everyone to find out about it. And so we'd have a designated spot every Saturday and we'd go there. Sort of the same thing. You just go there and get all fucked up with everybody.

[Garrett Morris]

But you see, I'm sure that the reason why that didn't happen to me, because at first I set up not going in the first place, right? So when that started happening, people probably say, well, you know him, you know, he doesn't.

[Dana Carvey]

Well.

[David Spade]

Well, you had some responsibilities.

[Dana Carvey]

But I remember when I first got an snl, Lauren was telling me about, you know, Chevy and Danny and everybody and Garrett. You said, garrett.

[Garrett Morris]

Wait a minute, do that again.

[Dana Carvey]

Chevy and Danny and, you know, Eddie and all the people and Paul, you know, you could never get Garrett to the party unless you brought some cocaine and some hookers. I go, really?

[Garrett Morris]

Right, I'm sure.

[David Spade]

Right.

[Garrett Morris]

I'm sure that. Listen, I'm sure they would have said that, and they would have been correct.

[David Spade]

It's good bait.

[Dana Carvey]

Well, the thing about it was coming in 86, you guys were badasses. Like, to me, that original cast, you guys were. Oh, little. Oh, a little bit of a. Okay, let's power flower.

[David Spade]

Oh, you're going to blow your nose. Yeah.

[Dana Carvey]

A little gentleman joins us. Been on Saturday Night Live from the original cast, young man named Garrett Morris. Can we come? But we thought of you guys as badass pirates. You would fight, there were drugs, you know, Chevy and. And Bill Murray would fight, and Belushi was like a badass. And then we got in and people were having like Amstel lights. We'd have a Bud Light at the party with me and Phil and just look around.

[David Spade]

Yeah, we didn't party as hard, so we didn't belong.

[Garrett Morris]

Well, can I say something about John. Yeah, John. When he and I were both into the cocaine thing.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah.

[Garrett Morris]

Never really talked to me unless he needed cocaine. And I get a knock on the

[Dana Carvey]

door, hey, buddy, come in.

[Garrett Morris]

And I put my, you know, 10 spawn down there. You know what he would do?

[David Spade]

Do 10 of them.

[Garrett Morris]

By the time he got to, I had none left.

[Dana Carvey]

So he would just go in, get a straw on his nose, go down on the desk. You were about to snort the coke, and he would snort all of it.

[Garrett Morris]

Oh, my God. He didn't. A little bit. A little bit at the end. God.

[David Spade]

Nice guy.

[Garrett Morris]

A brilliantly talented man. But boy.

[Dana Carvey]

Boy, I had mineral water and Nora Dunn would come in and just chug it. Oh, I'm kidding. No, but what was it about? Like, I tried cocaine. I've talked about it. I just. Like you're saying you're fighting being introverted. Like, when I did cocaine, within 30 seconds, I was very sad. I. I just really. It made me very anxious and very paranoid. I only tried it twice. And I. One time I did some cocaine, drove to the comedy club, and I couldn't go in the club because I knew they all hated me in there. Then I just drove back home. So how did it. But I knew people that cocaine spoke to them, that eventually they had it in a little thing and they just sniff it all day. So what did it do to you?

[Garrett Morris]

I mean, cocaine did the opposite to me. It liven me up.

[David Spade]

Yeah. Oh, because you were an introvert, so it kind of opened you up.

[Dana Carvey]

But then you need more cocaine, right? You're losing the high. You got to get more.

[David Spade]

Right? That's the trouble.

[Garrett Morris]

That's the trouble. Because the thing, that first high, you never get it again. Damn it again, David. After that, you're striving to get that first high. So even if you're on for like 35 years, which I was.

[Dana Carvey]

35 years.

[Garrett Morris]

Yeah. That you get. Never get that again. Then you start smoking it, right? And you get that. Then smoking it, you're coming down. So you keep coming down for you. Never get that first tire again. Okay?

[Dana Carvey]

So.

[David Spade]

Doesn't make you stop chasing it. I was there. I did it for a while.

[Garrett Morris]

Well, Lynn Bias is one first. Do you remember Lynn Bias?

[David Spade]

Oh, yeah. What a mess. Yeah. And he.

[Garrett Morris]

When that happened to him, I started thinking, garrett, you're way older than this guy. You're way older, and you know something's going. You know, you're lucky that that didn't happen to you.

[David Spade]

You know, Garrett, I was. I was in it during Len Bias Len Bias, for the. For the listeners, is a basketball player that got recruited by the Celtics, I think.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah.

[David Spade]

And I think he died after draft night or something from doing too much cocaine, something, I think, before he played. And that was the first time I think I knew you could die from just doing straight cocaine. Like, I hadn't heard of it.

[Garrett Morris]

Excuse me. Excuse me.

[David Spade]

Oh, he's. He dropped his joint. His house is on fire.

[Dana Carvey]

No, he's actually. Oh. Oh. Is it okay to say that we think our friend Garrett Morris is enjoying some fine cannabis.

[Garrett Morris]

Sativa. Sativa.

[David Spade]

Sativa.

[Dana Carvey]

Oh, oh. So that's like, what does that do? It evens your energy out or what?

[Garrett Morris]

Sativa is a kind of marijuana that lets you stay awake.

[David Spade]

Oh, it's upper. Okay.

[Garrett Morris]

Yeah. It's an uproar. If you get a hybrid, it's in between. If you get indica, you're going to go to sleep. So a lot of times when I'm working, I'll either do it. Is that weird outfolking or with this, you know.

[Dana Carvey]

Well, I worked with Scatman Carruthers once in Rockefeller Center.

[Garrett Morris]

Yeah, I envy you. Okay.

[Dana Carvey]

Oh,

[Garrett Morris]

man.

[Dana Carvey]

Angel from heaven, sweetest guy.

[Garrett Morris]

Oh, wow.

[Dana Carvey]

And always was. He'd go in the bathroom and you'd hear him and he'd be smoking weed, you know. And so one night, it was the one anniversary, one year anniversary of John Lennon's death. And my brother was visiting the show. It was a sitcom with Mickey Rooney, another crazy man. And Scatman gave us a joint. He rolled it in front of us and he had both ends were closed off. He did it without even looking, you know. And so then we tried it and it was terrible. It was really weak. So the next break, I brought back some Colombian pop, Santa Cruz Purple, I did. And the next day, the elevator. Now, Scatman was from the 30s when it was illicit in the elevator, people around, he says to me, quote, the music was good. Might I get a pound

[David Spade]

of your weed?

[Dana Carvey]

After the show was over, my brother and I got a huge bag of pot, grocery bag of pot. Drove it down to Van Nuys, where Scatman live. Brought him the pot, played banjo, kept in touch with it. No, his guitar.

[David Spade]

Yeah.

[Dana Carvey]

And ukulele still going strong. Minnie the Moochie, we never met, like a. A character like Scatman, you know, you see that man there? He said, he points to the janitor, he goes, that man's an artist.

[Garrett Morris]

That man is an artist.

[Dana Carvey]

You know, he was just taking us all these different places like that. What he Did.

[David Spade]

He was in Blues Brothers, Dana. And that's the only reason I knew who he was. I was young and I saw. I think he was in Blues Brothers. He sang Minnie the Moocher. Is that what I'm thinking?

[Garrett Morris]

Did you see Blue was in it, right?

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah, he was in the Shining.

[David Spade]

Oh, I don't. Oh, yeah. Oh, that was him.

[Dana Carvey]

Jack Nicholson.

[Garrett Morris]

You know what? I have never seen that.

[Dana Carvey]

It's scary.

[Garrett Morris]

I love my man, but I hate scary movies. Yeah, I hate scary movies.

[David Spade]

Yeah, so do I, dude. I'm with you.

[Dana Carvey]

Well, you said that Jack brought in a suitcase of pot into London.

[David Spade]

By pod, you mean cocaine.

[Dana Carvey]

No, this was cannabis. And he goes. And they go. And Jack goes, I'm not gonna sell it. It's just for my personal use. And they let him through. Really?

[David Spade]

Yeah, because he's a monster shoe. I. I have another thing. Did you have any favorite sketches back then, Garrett, when you were there that first year?

[Garrett Morris]

The Colossal President.

[David Spade]

What was that?

[Dana Carvey]

Colossal President.

[Garrett Morris]

Yeah, that was this thing at the Twelve Mile island or something like that, where the nuclear thing.

[Dana Carvey]

Oh, Four Mile Island.

[David Spade]

Three Mile.

[Garrett Morris]

Three Mile.

[Dana Carvey]

Three Mile. I knew 5K. Yeah.

[Garrett Morris]

Everybody's big, and I. I'm the wife of the president, and he's big, and I'm big, you know? Another one that was my favorite, not for any other reason, but I really think about it as a way in which somebody didn't get the mess. It was with O.J. simpson.

[Dana Carvey]

Oh.

[Garrett Morris]

Where he was a Mandingo who goes around raping all the black slaves or female slaves. And at the end, I'm supposed to. We're supposed to kiss. I don't want to kiss him. David in a sketch is to kiss, you know, like this. To kiss him. And he backs away as if I really wanted.

[David Spade]

You were just acting, right? Yeah.

[Dana Carvey]

Oh, man.

[Garrett Morris]

Another one is something that Alice Flybell did. The baseball.

[David Spade]

Very, very good.

[Dana Carvey]

Chico. Baseball been very, very good for me. Yeah.

[Garrett Morris]

Actually, Chico Escuela is really Brian Dahl, Murray's original concept. He's funny, his brother came up with. Then Alan enlarged on it. Right. So we would do a piece like that all the time. And also, I can't throw out something that Chevy came up with for me, which is hard to hear it.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah. Which became kind of a run. Everyone knows.

[David Spade]

Are you sure?

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah.

[David Spade]

And Zwei Bell's a big writer there.

[Garrett Morris]

Yeah.

[David Spade]

He was good, right?

[Garrett Morris]

I love him. I love Swinel.

[David Spade]

Yeah, yeah, he's great. Thy ticket, Lady Jennifer of Coolidge.

[Dana Carvey]

Well, many thanks, good sir. Here is my Discover card.

[Garrett Morris]

They accept Discover at Renaissance Fairs.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah, they do here. Discover is accepted at the places I love to shop.

[Garrett Morris]

Geth with the times. With the times.

[David Spade]

You're playing the loot.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah, and it sounds pretty good, right? Discovery is accepted at 99% of places

[David Spade]

that take credit cards nationwide. Based on the February 2025 Nielsen report.

[Garrett Morris]

Hey, Sal.

[David Spade]

Hank.

[Dana Carvey]

What's going on?

[David Spade]

We haven't worked a case in years.

[Garrett Morris]

I just bought my car at Carvana and it was so easy.

[Dana Carvey]

Too easy.

[Garrett Morris]

Think something's up? You tell me. They got thousands of options, found a

[Dana Carvey]

great car at a great price, and it got delivered the next day. It sounds like Carvana just makes it

[Garrett Morris]

easy to buy your car, Hank. Yeah, you're right. Case closed.

[Dana Carvey]

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[Garrett Morris]

Inhale.

[Dana Carvey]

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[Garrett Morris]

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[Dana Carvey]

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[Garrett Morris]

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[Dana Carvey]

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[Garrett Morris]

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[Dana Carvey]

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[Garrett Morris]

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[Dana Carvey]

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[David Spade]

But Garrett, now, when you did in the beginning. Oh, first of all, now that. That one. I don't know when prior hosted or what year it was when they. That sketch with Chevy. I think it must have been the first year. Wasn't Chevy only one year?

[Dana Carvey]

Yep.

[Garrett Morris]

No, Chevy came in after a year and a half.

[David Spade]

Oh, no.

[Dana Carvey]

I thought that was Billy.

[Garrett Morris]

I'm sorry. No, no, she was in after. You're right. He was in like a year. Right. And then Bill Murray came in.

[Dana Carvey]

Right, right. And Chevy. Chevy blew up. What was that like when one cast member was like. Wasn't he on the COVID of Time or something? I mean, it just went.

[David Spade]

Pew.

[Garrett Morris]

Was he on a couple of times. I didn't know.

[Dana Carvey]

Or Newsweek. I mean, I know that Chevy just got so much.

[Garrett Morris]

I said, right on. With Fletch. That was the name of Fletch.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah. He did a lot of movies. Yeah.

[Garrett Morris]

I thought however he waited, he should have waited a little longer.

[David Spade]

Of course, I agree.

[Dana Carvey]

He wishes he'd never left. He. He wishes he'd stayed at least five years.

[Garrett Morris]

Right. Just like the guy who was on that cop show who later on did a csi.

[David Spade]

David Caruso.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah.

[Garrett Morris]

He left too soon.

[David Spade]

You know, that happens and I get. I sort of get it. But Chevy was a tall, great looking guy and he's a. And it was really good in comedy. And then he was a movie star. Like, I don't even know what that would be like. But to leave when you know it's the best show, it's the coolest show. Like, you guys. I know Chevy blew up, but all you guys were huge. The Beatles. I mean, everyone rebel.

[Dana Carvey]

I mean, there's just. Was nothing like it. I mean, I was in college, and what it was when it came on and I saw.

[Garrett Morris]

You guys feel old, fellas.

[Dana Carvey]

Okay, when I was old all the time, I.

[Garrett Morris]

How old were you?

[David Spade]

I was being born in the hospital. It was on tv, and I was like, this looks pretty funny.

[Garrett Morris]

Oh, my God.

[Dana Carvey]

I was born in 1988, but I.

[Garrett Morris]

When I. When I got into Saturday Night Live, I had been in New York about 17 years. Right.

[Dana Carvey]

And you were 38.

[Garrett Morris]

I was asked to join Saturday Night Live. All those other. Excuse me. Had just got out of high school and college. I was about 10 years away from. Oh, AARP. Okay.

[Dana Carvey]

Right.

[David Spade]

You didn't. You did not look older than anyone. You didn't stand out as, like, Phil

[Dana Carvey]

Hartman, I think was 38.

[Garrett Morris]

I'm 39 years old.

[David Spade]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Now, Garrett, this. Dana. I just want to ask him that. Which I. Everyone might know this, but Chevy does. There's some sketches people remember, you know, and one of them is Chevy interviewing Richard Pryor when he was there for a job. And who wrote that?

[Garrett Morris]

Huh?

[David Spade]

Who wrote that one?

[Garrett Morris]

I think Chevy and Richard together.

[Dana Carvey]

Oh, cool. Yeah, that. Yeah, that's like. I mean, when you look back on what you guys did comedically, that's a classic. And then what you could. What we call it now, since what we can get away with now, you know, it's just very different at the time. Even at the time, it was incendiary, but now it would be, like, go to a test pattern.

[Garrett Morris]

Right.

[Dana Carvey]

It would just get canceled.

[Garrett Morris]

I mean, Lauren, he did at the right time. Because in about 10 years, we got into what we are into now. Right. Which is where.

[David Spade]

Which is a softening.

[Garrett Morris]

Yeah. I mean, with all due respect to the brilliant cast that Saturday Night Live had always had, you can't really write for them the way they wrote for us then. I mean, you know, And I hate that.

[Dana Carvey]

I hate it. Change.

[David Spade]

It's a Rubik's Cube. You got to really. You really have to cleverly get clever stuff in, because you can't. It's almost like you're pulling from the same eight jokes that everyone's allowed to use now.

[Garrett Morris]

Right.

[David Spade]

And that Won't make people mad. But you guys, I think the first five. I think you're on for five years that at least the Standards and Practices didn't even know what to say no to. They were like, this is so ridiculous. Like, they had to learn and go, well, we don't like that. We're getting a lot of complaints about that. We have to stop that. But it was like playing Whack a Mole, because every week you think of a new way to offend people. And that was the greatest part of it.

[Dana Carvey]

Well, no. No one cared initially. And then the show became a smash. At what point? Two years in, you guys just blew up. But initially, probably they didn't. No one's watching.

[Garrett Morris]

We had a lot of people who were. We thought were progressive. Okay, look, in my opinion, the true progressive.

[David Spade]

Yeah.

[Garrett Morris]

Without any sign of racism whatsoever. But I.

[Dana Carvey]

So he's like. So he's like me.

[Garrett Morris]

I thought, for instance, that Michael o', Donoghue, because of his past, would be the same way. Michael Donahue, with all due respect, was an absolute racist.

[Dana Carvey]

You gotta add motherfucker to that. Because it just thought.

[Garrett Morris]

Very first show, there was a skit that was going to have a black doctor, right? Have a doctor, not a black doctor. And I wasn't in it at all. So I said, hey, Michael, why don't we have the doctor be black? You know what he tells me? Well, Gary, the audience might be thrown by a black doctor. Now, this is 1975, right? Now, I'm from New Orleans, where from the time I was 12 years old, I was surrounded by not only by hordes of black medical Doctors, but black PhDs as well. And I'm wondering how a guy whose name is associated with National Lampoon doesn't fucking know this.

[Dana Carvey]

Did he not see Guess who's Coming to Dinner with Sidney Poitier? Which I saw in the theater at age 8, and it infected me the rest of my life. And I got to do a lot of benefits of Cedar Sidney Poitier. And he's another real gentleman. Sorry, I'm still a little high. I'm slurring.

[David Spade]

Well, that's tough, because, yeah, you're lighting the show. You say, hey, can I get thrown into a sketch? And he said, no, this one's not right for you. And it's like, oh, boy, you can't

[Garrett Morris]

be a black doctor. What are you talking about? You know, we're talking about 50.8. I remember being almost. You walk by a person, just walk by and you. I'm on 72nd street and he's coming towards me and I feel like a half a block away. I say, that's fucking signifier, right? And he just passed him like that to this day. I remember that day, you know.

[Dana Carvey]

Oh yeah, he was so eloquent. I remember I did a bunch of benefits for Cedars Sinai and he was always there. And then one time I got off stage and I was walking to the audience, he stopped me and I was able to do my. Yeah. And he gave me some praise and I did my. I said, they call me Mr. Tibbs from the. And he laughed so hard. It was Rod Steiger, I think. But yeah, for me there were so many brilliant movies in the 60s and 70s and just a lot of my heroes were black. I mean, just Jimi Hendrix. My brother came in 1966. He came home, he was 13. He said, I just saw the best guitar player in the world. I said, what's his name? He goes, jimi Hendrix. But we didn't. We weren't. We were kind of progressive in our own way back then because we just wanted to see Jimmy. We didn't think, you know. And I went to the first integrated. A very, very well integrated high school with busing in 1969.

[Garrett Morris]

So talking about Jimi Hendrix, you know what he did when he came back from England where he'd over become famous? He got on the corner of 125th street and 7th Avenue and played the guitar for like 18 hours or so just to introduce people to him. He was really something else.

[Dana Carvey]

He was no. Like Neil Young has said about him. No one's ever played the guitar like Jimi Hendrix did.

[David Spade]

Jimi Hendrix was never. He did. He d. Before snl. He's somebody they would have.

[Dana Carvey]

He was one of those caught up in.

[David Spade]

Yeah, you know.

[Garrett Morris]

Yeah, he died. He was like 27, right?

[Dana Carvey]

27, yeah. You know, Janis Joplin, around the same age.

[Garrett Morris]

I hate it when that happened to Jen. So I loved her ass, man. I mean, you know what I mean?

[David Spade]

Yeah.

[Dana Carvey]

Well, again, you know, there are. There's just certain talents like Janice's singing and. Is a word I use a lot supernatural. I mean that's screaming. The intensity of it was just crazy.

[Garrett Morris]

With all due respect, especially coming out of a white woman. Okay, sure.

[David Spade]

Yeah. She had such a talent. And then it almost like they burn out quickly because it's so much talent. And so that voice is so cool and everything and you hope it's around forever, but yeah.

[Garrett Morris]

Yeah.

[Dana Carvey]

Well, it's also just the accidental plane with fire, you know, Jim Morrison. Once you start Playing with opioids and mixing that stuff in, you know, of course, you know, John Belushi, you know, it's. It wasn't intentional, but you're playing with fire. It's. It's just.

[David Spade]

Yeah.

[Garrett Morris]

Matter of fact, that's another thing that started me to straighten up.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah. John's death.

[David Spade]

Was John during. When you were on SNL, when was it? I can't. He was 33.

[Dana Carvey]

Like, 83, I think. Right. It was after SNL when he. He died.

[Garrett Morris]

Yeah. And the thing is, John and I didn't really hang only when he needed cocaine, did he?

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah, right. Yeah, sure. So what. How did that affect you? That get you off cocaine? Or you just started to slow down or what happened?

[Garrett Morris]

Slow down. And by the time I came here, here I was. It's not something you could just stop, but by 2005, I went to A8. Alcohol synonymous.

[David Spade]

Yeah.

[Garrett Morris]

And they do something that exasperates you, they will call your ass.

[Dana Carvey]

Okay.

[David Spade]

And.

[Dana Carvey]

Right.

[Garrett Morris]

Will sponsor you over and over. And so through that, I really. I've succeeded in getting rid of it. Okay. Much different with cigarettes, which I still am struggling with, but I'm glad that it's 2005. It's been nice. Dutch. 2002. 22.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah. Here we are.

[Garrett Morris]

Since. That's what, 17 years? 16.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah.

[Garrett Morris]

Yeah.

[Dana Carvey]

Well, the body has a remarkable healing apparatus once. Once you give it a break, you know. So you're. Did you have a lot of people, lived a long time in your family tree?

[Garrett Morris]

Matter of fact, my grandfather lived in 92.

[Dana Carvey]

Okay, so. So you got some longevity.

[Garrett Morris]

Yeah, my grandmother got. I'm sure, got cancer when she was in her 50s. My mother lived to 80, but she didn't take care of herself. Okay, so there's a couple, you know, either. I'm gonna hook up my grandfather and, you know, stay for a minute.

[Dana Carvey]

How do you deal with stress? Are you really Buddhist? Are you really Zen? Are you relaxed in your brain all the time?

[Garrett Morris]

Gary, all the respect. I know you guys hear Buddhism and you think Zen. Zen, it's not. Is only one part of Buddhists. There are 300 over 300,000 Buddhists worldwide. And kill them. Unlike me, they chant, which is not the same thing as the Zen Buddhists. Okay, Right. So you chant, they meditate.

[Dana Carvey]

Domne arigatu. Domne arigatu. Domne arigatu. Domne arigatu.

[Garrett Morris]

No, it's. Nam myohrengya harigatu.

[Dana Carvey]

I fucked it up. Let me hear it.

[Garrett Morris]

Nam myoho renge kyo. Nam myoho renge kyo, which is dedicated to the mystic law of cause and effect, which means you don't believe in a personal God, but you do regard the law as being in the place that most other religions place God. It is the most sacred.

[Dana Carvey]

I did transcendental meditation and my mantra is dumb. Not a lot of people.

[Garrett Morris]

I am a TM practitioner too.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah. My. My mantra dominantly, which I found out later was Native American for job. Your shorts. We don't have much time.

[Garrett Morris]

Are you telling people your mantra?

[Dana Carvey]

No, I was kidding. I'm just joking. I would never tell you my mantra.

[David Spade]

I like. Yeah, don't tell them.

[Dana Carvey]

My mantra is Garrett, Garrett, Garrett.

[David Spade]

After snl. First of all, there's too many cool people there. You had. You had Danny Aykroyd, who we did. I did two movies with three, actually. Great guy.

[Garrett Morris]

Beautiful guy.

[David Spade]

Yes, he was beautiful. Dude. I seem like. Did you hang with anyone after the. The following years messing up? You stay in touch or just see him when you see him kind of thing?

[Garrett Morris]

So I saw him when I saw him when Jane was out here doing two rock pieces off on the phone.

[David Spade]

Oh, that's right. Jane was on Second Rock from the Sun. Third Rock from the Sun. Right.

[Garrett Morris]

And now I have a quadrant relationship with Lorraine.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah, Lorraine. Yeah.

[Garrett Morris]

Hannah, who is very, very talented.

[David Spade]

Oh, hacks. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Garrett Morris]

Dynamite actor. And.

[David Spade]

Yes.

[Garrett Morris]

So a very fine comedian. She did my show last year. Yeah.

[David Spade]

Garrett, who was your head writer when you started? Was it Anne Beats?

[Garrett Morris]

And Beats was. Yes, she was.

[David Spade]

See, they had a girl head writer back then, which is probably.

[Garrett Morris]

Yeah, right. That was unusual.

[David Spade]

More rare than a black doctor.

[Garrett Morris]

And that other guy we talked. We didn't mention. That was the assistant head writer.

[David Spade]

I know who you're talking about.

[Garrett Morris]

And look, I was very sorry about what happened to him because I think that I'm not going to call their names. They backed him up when that thing happened. They should have backed him up and not let him go the way he did.

[Dana Carvey]

Was there a lot of politics?

[David Spade]

I know what you're talking about.

[Dana Carvey]

A lot of politics.

[Garrett Morris]

What we did was not what. He didn't have to leave because of that.

[David Spade]

Yeah.

[Dana Carvey]

I tend to agree it was a purge that had to happen, but some people got swept up into it that maybe in a more reasonable time would have.

[Garrett Morris]

Yeah, yeah, he's done it. Being treated like that.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah, I agree. Yeah. Geez, I wonder if I'm canceled right now. Do you think we could be canceled?

[David Spade]

You're canceled because you agreed.

[Dana Carvey]

We said, suck my dick. I Said Sidney Poitier, black man.

[David Spade]

First of all, he says, with all due respect to us, and then he says, with all due respect, motherfucker to other people. So it really did.

[Dana Carvey]

I got called a white man. So I'm. I'm just happy the rest of the day. Like my day is a home run now because.

[Garrett Morris]

Do you have any kids?

[Dana Carvey]

I've got two sons and they're in

[Garrett Morris]

show business every day. Oh, Jesus.

[David Spade]

Yeah, I guess so. I mean, he got you on a technicality.

[Dana Carvey]

Motherfucker is just a great word because of the rhythm of it. Motherfucker, you know, it's a great word. I mean, gosh darn it, that's not.

[Garrett Morris]

Doesn't get in my community.

[Dana Carvey]

Gentlemen, you say it better.

[Garrett Morris]

He's a bad. Meaning you, Dana. Meaning a great guy.

[David Spade]

Yeah, I like that.

[Garrett Morris]

I say of like, oh, Rachel Maddow. I say she's a bad right rather

[Dana Carvey]

than a right, she's a bad you.

[Garrett Morris]

Although I don't look at the news anymore because it's depresses me.

[Dana Carvey]

No, no, no, it's con. It's. It's designed to get us all angry.

[Garrett Morris]

When I was Rachel all the time. And what's the old lady? Joy Reed, you know, I read.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah.

[Garrett Morris]

You know, Ari Melbourne, you know.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah.

[Garrett Morris]

Brian. Yeah, so Brian Williams was my thing until. Until the news just started bringing me down.

[David Spade]

Here. Before I. Before I. We let you go me out. Do you still sing? Dana said you're a good singer.

[Garrett Morris]

I used to sing High Seas, now I sing low Cs. I sing the blues now. I don't sing, you know.

[Dana Carvey]

Oh, you do any Albert King or who you singing?

[Garrett Morris]

Money Waters and stuff like Muddy Waters.

[David Spade]

Yeah.

[Garrett Morris]

My favorite blues singer is Muddy Waters.

[Dana Carvey]

Oh, I loved Albert King. Blues power, great.

[Garrett Morris]

Albert King was great.

[Dana Carvey]

That baby. That baby and his baby had a baby bed all fussing up. He's got the blues. He got the good old fashioned country blues. Remember Albert? Wasn't he magic? And of course, Muddy Waters. I mean, you know, he's. That's another guy. Lay it honest, don't be shy. But you sang with the Harry Belafonte singer.

[Garrett Morris]

I was with him for like nine years as a. My first job in the business was as a singer arranger with.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah. That's so amazing.

[Garrett Morris]

The Belafonte Singers.

[David Spade]

The Belafonte Singers, yeah.

[Garrett Morris]

As a 12 member group that he managed. Right. He sang periodically, but they used to sang without him, so we too.

[Dana Carvey]

Who sang that thing? You put the lime in the coconut. You put it in, right. That was Harry. Okay.

[David Spade]

That was Harry Belafonte.

[Garrett Morris]

Yeah, yeah.

[Dana Carvey]

And then it became a commercial, too.

[David Spade]

Yeah. What about 7Up is the Blues?

[Dana Carvey]

Now you can. You can get laid with that.

[Garrett Morris]

85, that's all day.

[Dana Carvey]

85, still alive.

[David Spade]

86, you got cool voice.

[Dana Carvey]

87, you're in heaven. 88, don't be late. 89, won't you be mine. 90.

[David Spade]

Jesus.

[Dana Carvey]

Holy heaven.

[David Spade]

Holly, was this your SNL audition? That was a good one. I know. I've had dinner with them. Well, Garrett, thank you for coming on.

[Dana Carvey]

This has been a delight. You're so much fun. I feel happier hanging out with you for this hour.

[Garrett Morris]

Thank you so much, fellas. Even thinking about this old guy.

[David Spade]

Yeah, you're good, dude. And it's. You know, we all got a job because of you and the squad up.

[Garrett Morris]

Oh, my God.

[David Spade]

And Lauren and I just want to

[Dana Carvey]

say 100 episodes on Jamie Foxx. You're on the Martin Show.

[Garrett Morris]

Talented men.

[David Spade]

Okay, thank you.

[Garrett Morris]

But extremely talented. And you got your fucking job.

[Dana Carvey]

We do the best we can. You're terrific. You're tremendous. Excuse me. Many people. Who's better than Garrett Moss? Nobody. Listen, many people are saying, never better. Nobody's ever done it like him. Come on, let's get real, folks. No joke. I'm not kidding around. Garrett Morris. Here's the deal.

[Garrett Morris]

Come on. We could do better.

[Dana Carvey]

We will do better.

[David Spade]

You got Trump and Biden at the end.

[Garrett Morris]

I love you, man.

[Dana Carvey]

Thank you, brother. Can we hang out sometime? Can you?

[Garrett Morris]

You got my number.

[David Spade]

All right. Garrett. Miss you, bud.

[Garrett Morris]

No, let me thank you guys for this. I appreciate it.

[Dana Carvey]

I just really enjoyed this. I know I'm a little fuzzy and my words aren't coming out as well as they normally do, but. Because of the dental work. But I got the prior joke out. I completed it and that made my day.

[David Spade]

It was a three parter.

[Dana Carvey]

Yeah. Now I'm going to pack myself an ice, get a B12 shot, and crack a Coors light.

[Garrett Morris]

We don't want to end the show with the words, suck my dick. Okay.

[Dana Carvey]

No, no. What would be the substitution? So instead of saying, suck my dick.

[Garrett Morris]

Yes.

[Dana Carvey]

You kind of say, how about a hand job, dear? I guess that's a little more benign. Maybe not so dramatic.

[David Spade]

I got one. Good night. Hey, guys, if you're loving this podcast, which you are, you are, be sure to click follow on your favorite podcast app, Give us review 5 star rating, and maybe even share an episode that you've loved with a friend.

[Dana Carvey]

If you're watching this episode on YouTube, please subscribe. We're on video now.

[David Spade]

Fly on the Wall is presented by Odyssey, an executive produced by Danny Carvey and David Spade, Heather Santoro and Greg Holtzman, Maddie Sprung Kaiser and Leah Reese Dennis of Odyssey.

[Dana Carvey]

Our senior producer producer is Greg Holtzman and the show is produced and edited

[David Spade]

by Phil Sweet Tech booking by Cultivated Entertainment.

[Dana Carvey]

Special thanks to Patrick Fogarty, Evan Cox, Maura Curran, Melissa Wester, Hillary Schuff, Eric Donnelly, Colin Gaynor, Sean Cherry, Kirk Courtney and Lauren Vieira.

[David Spade]

Reach out with us. Any questions be asked and answered on the show? You can email [e-mail] that's a U-A C-Y dot com.