RE-RELEASE - John Corbett

Summary

Podcast Summary: Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade

Episode: RE-RELEASE – John Corbett
Release Date: July 15, 2026
Host: Audacy
Guests: John Corbett
Timestamp Guide: [MM:SS] format

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Episode Overview

This episode of Fly on the Wall features actor John Corbett, known for his roles in "Northern Exposure," "Sex and the City," and "My Big Fat Greek Wedding." The hosts, Dana Carvey and David Spade, join Corbett in an engaging, comedic conversation about his unique journey into Hollywood, life as an actor, the realities and grind behind the scenes, and his reflections on career fulfillment. The conversation is full of showbiz anecdotes, playful banter, and honest insights, keeping true to the podcast’s signature candid and witty tone.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Early Life, Family, and an Unlikely Path to Acting

• Boilermaker Origins:
  • After high school in West Virginia, Corbett moved to California to meet his largely absent father:
    • “From the time I was two till I graduated high school, I saw him two times…” [09:58] (John Corbett)
  • Worked as a boilermaker (welder), describing the tough environment ("like Full Metal Jacket" [13:19]).
• Injury and Pivot:
  • Corbett’s back injury ended his welding career, leading him into junior college, where acting classes changed his path:
    • “As soon as I walked in there, I just said, fucking, this is for me...” [14:40]
• First Foray Into Entertainment:
  • Started with extra work on shows like "Chips" and "Cagney and Lacey":
    • “You can learn a lot...what a key grip is...I used that as—by the time I got my first one line on a movie, I knew what everybody did...” [16:17]

2. The Hairdresser Era & Getting Into Hollywood

• Learning from Both Sides:
  • Attended hair school while going to acting classes for practicality:
    • “I knew one thing's going to happen. There was money in people’s show business pockets and I was going to fucking take some of it out one way or another.” [23:10]
• Expectations vs Reality:
  • Far from the "Shampoo" fantasy, his clients were mostly elderly ladies, not glamorous starlets:
    • “Every client I have is a little old Jewish lady who’s coming in for a three dollar set...” [24:33]
• First Commercial & Hollywood Lessons:
  • Landed a Samsung commercial yielding $8,000/month, leading him to quit the salon:
    • “One commercial…that’s what gets you addicted. You go, holy crap.” [32:10]
• On “Making It” in Showbiz:
  • Corbett and Spade both stress the improbability and emotional toll of show business:
    • “It’s like telling a kid standing in line for open mic night…you’re not going to do this for 30 years and live in a million dollar house.” [32:28]
    • “I think it’s emotionally violent to do this career.” [34:00] (Dana Carvey)

3. Groundlings, SNL Proximity, and Showbiz Networking [38:16+]

• Spotlight Operator at The Groundlings:
  • Corbett describes working at The Groundlings, witnessing future SNL stars Phil Hartman and Jon Lovitz:
    • “So I said, is there any job that I could do here?...He says, ‘You ever work a spotlight?’...[42:29]
• Early SNL Connections:
  • Remembers Lovitz leaving for SNL auditions, being in awe of that leap:
    • “Now in my mind, this is not possible...that you have run across in the world might be on Saturday Night Live, right?” [45:30]
• Personal Anecdotes:
  • Lovitz acted as couples counselor for Corbett and a girlfriend at a charity event:
    • “For about an hour was like a therapist to us, telling us why we should be kind to each other, how to get through this thing…” [49:19]
  • Lovitz’s dual persona: comedic character vs. caring friend.

4. Behind the Curtain – Truth About Acting & Hollywood

• Reality of the Actor’s Life:
  • Corbett reflects on the lack of creative fulfillment:
    • “I picked the wrong thing to do with my life…Being an actor is for once, since I was a kid, I hate to be told what to do by any authority figure...I feel like a puppet.” [67:47], [68:51]
    • “If you came to visit any one of us for two days…you’d say, I never want to be here ever, ever again. This is like watching paint dry.” [70:09]
  • The difficulty of the audition process, agent stories (“Old Dick Dunn” character), and near-misses:
    • [26:28] “The two toughest things: getting an agent and getting your SAG card. They’re almost impossible things to do.”

5. Hollywood Legends, Iconic Events, and Movie Tidbits

• 1992 MTV Awards:
  • Corbett, Spade, and Carvey reminisce about the legendary night:
    • “The three of us were at the 1992 MTV Awards that some people say were the best awards ever…” [51:13]
• Tommy Boy Stories:
  • Corbett shares Bo Derek's last-minute casting and anecdotes from the film (espresso machine story):
    • “She landed in Toronto in the morning and by the afternoon she was shooting the swimming pool scene.” [54:05]
    • “Chris [Farley] was doing a shot of espresso between each take.” [57:19]
  • “We were stressed out of our fucking gourds.” [59:50] (David Spade)
  • On movie-making grind:
    • “The more somebody laughs and fucks up a take, the more you gotta stay there and do it. And the clock just ticks.” [60:50]
    • “Farley would constantly, like, machine-gun laugh when he fucks up…” [61:16]

6. Career Highlights & Reflections

• Iconic Roles: “Northern Exposure,” “Sex and the City,” “My Big Fat Greek Wedding,” “Parenthood,” and TV/film collaborations. [67:00+]
• Favorite Co-stars:
  • On Sarah Jessica Parker:
    • “If I had to act the rest of my life and had to pick one person, it would be her, man...She’s the best.” [77:02]
• Longing for Control and Creativity:
  • Corbett expresses envy of stand-ups and musicians’ ability to control their careers and output.
• Musician Side:
  • Episode ends with Corbett’s song “In Control” played by the hosts.
    • “That’s a lot of fun. As you know, being a fellow musician, that’s a lot of fun.” [81:17]

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “Every client I have is a little old Jewish lady who’s coming in for a three dollar set, right? And I’m gonna get a dime and maybe a quarter for a tip...” [24:33] – John Corbett
• “You can learn a lot...what a key grip is...I used that as—by the time I got my first one line on a movie, I knew what everybody did...” [16:17] – John Corbett
• “I picked the wrong thing to do with my life. Right. I mean, I really—you know, being an actor is… I hate to be told what to do… but basically, I’m a puppet.” [67:47], [68:51] – John Corbett
• “If you can act for 20 seconds, that's it. You can, you can own Hollywood.” [19:44] – Dana Carvey
• “If you came to visit any one of us for two days… you’d say, I never want to be here ever, ever again. This is like watching paint dry.” [70:09] – John Corbett
• “The three of us were at the 1992 MTV Awards that some people say were the best awards ever…” [51:13] – John Corbett
• “The more somebody laughs and fucks up a take, the more you gotta stay there and do it. And the clock just ticks... you could have been out of here an hour ago!” [60:50] – John Corbett (on film bloopers)
• On Bo Derek’s last-minute casting:
  “She landed in Toronto in the morning and by the afternoon she was shooting the swimming pool scene.” [54:05] – John Corbett

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• [09:58] – Corbett on meeting his father after high school
• [14:40] – Discovering acting after injury
• [16:17] – Learning from extra work
• [24:33] – Life as a hairdresser in Los Angeles
• [26:28] – The challenge of breaking into Hollywood
• [42:29] – Getting the spotlight job at Groundlings, seeing future SNL stars
• [49:19] – Jon Lovitz as therapist, revealing his “earnest” side
• [54:05] – Behind-the-scenes of Bo Derek’s casting in “Tommy Boy”
• [57:19] – Chris Farley’s caffeine-driven set antics
• [60:50] – The grind of film-making and dealing with bloopers
• [67:47] – Corbett on creative fulfillment and puppet analogy
• [77:02] – Sarah Jessica Parker praise
• [81:17] – Playing Corbett’s song “In Control”

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Humor & Banter Highlights

• Dana and David riffing on the unglamorous side of acting and quipping about old Hollywood, agents, and hair (“Old Dick Dunn” bit, [27:14]).
• Playful jealousy about Corbett’s “boyfriend” roles and good looks:
  “Every girl I know that I mentioned, you know, that’s sort of your rap—oh my god, you fall in love with that guy so easily...” [06:23] – David Spade
• Running gags about hand softness, set etiquette, and the infamous blooper clock (“Just say it, Farley!” [61:28])
• Impersonations and requested bits: Dana’s “Red Rednecky” as Dennis Miller [78:25]

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Closing Thoughts

Corbett’s combination of candor, humor, and showbiz admiration shines as he opens up about the joys and letdowns of a long Hollywood career. His willingness to debunk the glamour while expressing gratitude gives this episode both comedic and emotional resonance, as do the lively anecdotes from all three performers. The behind-the-scenes look at old showbiz, the comedic grind, and even the bittersweet truths about creative fulfillment will appeal to both industry insiders and “fly on the wall” fans alike.

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End of Summary

Transcript

[A]

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[A]

Comedy royalty Kate McKinnon returns as Queen Mortuana and Heads Will Roll Heir Apparent, the highly anticipated sequel to Audible's fan favorite original comedy series. She's flanked once more by co star Emily Lynn and a new star studded ensemble including Richard Kind, Lori Metcalf, Jimmy Fallon, Megan Malay, Sam Richardson and Carrie Coon, plus an extensive cast of comedy greats. Seriously extensive. This is wall to wall comedy at the highest level. When we last left our gloriously unhinged Queen and her Raven sidekick JoJo, the unlikely besties had fled to the woods for a simpler life. Well, it did not last. Queen Mo is back on the throne, an heir apparent and facing her greatest challenge yet. Produce an heir before her 40th birthday or lose everything and spend eternity as Keeper of the Menstrual.

[B]

It's a very sticky sitch. Meanwhile, JoJo's botched wing enhancement surgery turns her into a toad, leading to unexpected interspecies romance and a choice between royal duty and normal life. With her throne on the line, Mo and JoJo embark on an increasingly unhinged scheme to secure succession. Part medieval mayhem, part razor sharp social commentary, Heads Will Roll Heir Apparent is fantasy comedy for the ages. It has everything trad wives, pollicules, Sasquatch, mercenaries, milk people, toad on mole, romance, a child named Barbara. Seriously, everything?

[A]

David, when was the last time you heard of a child named Barbara? Well, don't miss a moment of Kate McKinnon and the killer cast and heads will Roll Heir Apparent Seed a child or cede the throne. Listen to Heads Will Roll Air apparent available now on audible go to audible.com headswellrollseries to start listening today, our guest is a good friend of yours.

[B]

Yes. John Phineas Corbett.

[A]

John Zachariah Corbett.

[B]

Yes. He's a really good friend.

[A]

He.

[B]

This podcast was very interesting because I'd met with him before just to kind of get the lay of the land and I, I would hear little bits of stories. I go, so save it, save it, save it. Because his, his journey, if you haven't heard this one, is really, really interesting. Just a, a tease. Is like he was once a hairdresser, you know.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And, and it, he interacts with John Lovett's Phil Har. Anyway, so this, this was a very interesting one. And then he makes kind of a surprise analysis.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

At the end. So I would, if you haven't heard it, definitely listen to this one.

[A]

Yeah. I love it. I didn't know him, just knew him in passing and he was as advertised. You told me he had a lot of interesting things to say and he did. And he was really fun, light hearted, a lot of laughs, good looking, which I always.

[C]

Great.

[B]

He's tall and good looking. That's, that's, that's for sure.

[A]

I hid my jealousy for most of it. And yeah. Anyway, here he is, John Corbett.

[B]

John Corbett. What were you saying? All I saw was John being really animated. I click in and he goes. And so in the end I got the girl.

[C]

I always get the girl in the end. You know that.

[B]

I know. First time I met you, you just said I always played the boyfriend.

[C]

So I always chase the girl around the kitchen for 90 minutes and get her in the end.

[A]

In any movie, John and I have something in common. We're both the perfect boyfriend.

[C]

Here we are, you guys.

[B]

Yeah. You guys played a lot of boyfriends.

[C]

We played a lot. Yeah.

[A]

John, we'll talk about you for the rest of this. But I have to say, in all my movies and TV shows, I have never. I've only been married once. I've only been this guy just like flirting with girls. And it's just like the one part. It just shows how limited I am in acting. But other than that, I guess I could do other stuff. They just have never wanted to.

[B]

You could act. I mean, who, Who?

[C]

David.

[B]

David can act. But you. But you're like, damn, you're.

[C]

Listen, David's a fucking great actor.

[A]

There you go. Thank you.

[C]

Yeah. No, I'm serious. Here's the thing. I was thinking about you. I was thinking about both you guys because, you know, we're going to do this thing. So I start thinking about what's interesting in my life. And, you know, it's not just about me, this thing. And I've listened to a lot of your podcasts, so I love it when you guys talk about yourselves and. But, I mean, I was watching. I was watching you. We just for fun the other night, watched Tommy Boy again because I hadn't seen it since it was in the theaters, and I've never seen it with bo. Right. So we watched it and, man, you know what you reminded me of in that, David, is one of my favorite movies is Moneyball.

[A]

Right?

[C]

You guys see Moneyball?

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

Love it.

[A]

Jonah Hill.

[C]

Yeah, Jonah Hill. Very funny guy. Also. But did I could also so easily have seen you playing a role like that in. In Moneyball. Have people come to you for roles like that? Like, not just the big, broad comedy?

[A]

No, I was. I was sort of saying that because I was joking that in movies I'm always single. And I don't know why, but once it started, it was every TV show, every sitcom, every movie. And I've only been married once in a movie, they're like, what if you're actually married to a girl? Would anyone believe or understand that? And so that was sort of my funny thing. But I do. I do have a movie that we're doing in about a month where I sort of have a slightly different part. So that's. That's rare. But I'm not here to talk about that. I'm just here to say you are known as like, this perfect cool guy. And every girl I know that I mentioned, you know, that's sort of your rap is like, oh, my God, you fall in love with that guy so easily. So we don't have to only talk about that. But that is a nice rap to have, right?

[B]

And just to complete John's thought about you, David, is I think that your attitude and your rhythm in a comedy and then put that in, like, no one will know this except old people. A movie like Failsafe, where he's advising the president. In other words, your attitude in a serious scenario played very real, would be fun. I said that two years ago.

[A]

Now I would like that.

[B]

Now let me. I'm going to control the interview today. So now let me go to John.

[A]

Please do.

[B]

Dana, I gave. I gave David a compliment.

[A]

I love it. Thank you, Dana.

[C]

It is. It's rare that he gets. You know, the funny thing I noticed about. About the podcast is when sometimes David chimes in with something really funny when you guys are talking to somebody on a little bit of a roll. And David chimes in with something really funny, but David just rolls right over it. But then I can hear David. I can hear David chuckling to the funny thing in the background. That always kind of makes me laugh.

[A]

Well, basically, I'm interrupting the flow, so I just throw it in like that. Then. And the flow keeps going. And then I go like this. Not bad.

[C]

It's really good.

[A]

I like that one.

[B]

I get into interview mode. You know, I become like Mike Waller, some 60 Minutes or something. But, yeah, David, in the early days, was just coming onto this podcast, and so our producer used to count his yawns. Remember that? And then the podcast started. Everyone goes, hey, this is a big podcast. So then David doubled down, and now we're here.

[C]

Yeah, that's the reason. That's the reason. David's wondering why I'm here. Like, what the is this guy doing on this thing?

[B]

Because, no, we're not, but go ahead.

[C]

Not many people know this, but we are neighbors. Dana and I are neighbors up here in Paso Robos, and. And we. For a year now, every time I see Dana anywhere, I say, when are you going to get me on that podcast? I love that podcast. I got to get on it. And he's always. He's always saying, yes, we'll get you. We'll get you on someday. And finally, he just had enough, and he said, okay, you can come on. So that's why I'm. I'm here. Well, it'll be about an hour, and then you'll never have to deal with me again, Dana.

[B]

Well, the idea is, is that everyone we mentioned. Everyone knows you like you. You've done a lot of stuff. I mean, I don't know where to start, but I do. I do know a few little things. And you can share these, because I thought it was funny that you come out of high school and the phrase was, you work as a boilermaker, and that leads you to acting. Can you just tell that? So we'll start with that for now, for fun.

[C]

Yeah. Yeah. I left West Virginia right out of high school, I guess around 79, and came to California to meet my dad, who didn't know because they split up when I was 2. We lived in California, actually, until I was 2, and then my mom and I went back and.

[B]

Wait a minute. So you met your dad, like, at 19?

[C]

Yeah, from the time I was two till. Till I graduated high school, I saw him two times just because he was always working, and he had another family out here, and he came for two weekends I think when I was seven.

[A]

And he's. He's busy.

[B]

It's a theme on this podcast. David has his story. It's. Most of our guests have an absentee dad. I don't know why. Yeah, I just say it's, It's. I would love to have had an absentee dad, but that's another story.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

The other thing is daddy stays. And sometimes that can be rough. But anyway, so you meet your dad, you're in la, West Virginia. Then what happens?

[C]

Well, to your point, man, yeah. I'm so happy Daddy and I became drinking buddies when I showed up at his door at 18. But had Daddy stayed? Man, Daddy was a tough. I saw what the other kid was like that he raised. Daddy was a toughie. Right. So sometimes that's better that daddy takes a hike.

[A]

Dana had a toughie, too. I had a drinker, so I was the same thing. When I hooked up with him, we started drinking. So that's a good common denominator. Less pressure for them to be the dad. Once you turn 18, there's no child support. There's no. There's not as much stress for them. So that's when my dad softened a bit and started giving me his phone number and said, you can call me now instead of me calling you.

[C]

Yeah. Is he still around?

[A]

You know what I mean?

[B]

No.

[A]

And now I have to hang up and cry. No, he.

[B]

Something was.

[A]

No, he.

[B]

He was.

[A]

He was great once we figured it out, but, you know, I was sort of in the same boat, so I really keep going. I kind of relate to what you're saying.

[C]

Yeah. So my dad was a. Was a. Also a big drinker, but a smart guy. He was a. A nuclear welder. He helped build Sanofri power plant. And he was a watchmaker and really interesting guy. And he let me live with him. And he, you know, I just showed up at his door because I came on a cross country trip with some. With some friends.

[B]

Well, yeah. Yeah, you look like you. Was he. Did you kind of almost me? Did he. Was he six, five? And was he. Did you see it?

[C]

We're the same. It was crazy. We're the same size, same height. And. And wait. And, yeah, it was really weird, but. But he said, what do you want to do? Because I wasn't going to go to college. And he said, you want to be a boilermaker for people who don't know what that is? You know, like, it's not the top

[A]

10 things I was thinking, but it's not.

[B]

That was my third Choice.

[C]

It's crazy. It's, you know, your welders, iron ship builders, steam boiler makers. And so I got in that union and that's what I did for about four, four years.

[B]

Is it like a lot of welding with the big hat on and, you

[C]

know, it's, it's, it's mostly out there.

[B]

Well, the thing. The helmet.

[A]

You got to wear the helmet, Dana. One of us hasn't been boiling, maybe.

[B]

Look at these hands. Look at these hands. He's the little girl.

[A]

Softest hands I've ever seen.

[B]

You know what's bothering me? Look, a little baby. I got little girl hands.

[C]

Yeah, little baby.

[B]

Soft. Little, little soft gloves. I was, I watched Raging Ball last year. But now you're a welder. Boilermaker.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

You're in a shop. Have you got a really hard ass foreman fucking with you?

[C]

Yeah, everybody. You guys, every one of it quit Gold brick and yeah, every one of them has. Has a guy from Full Metal Jacket fucking telling you, let's go, let's go.

[B]

Full Metal Jacket.

[C]

It's Full Metal Jacket. Yeah, we're working. It's 10 hours a day, six days a week. So we're cranking out 60 hours a week. And yeah, it's just, you know, it's a. It's a tough, tough life. I mean, guys are losing fingers and hands and equipment and, you know, it's like, get a new guy. And it's like football. When the quarterback goes down, it's like. You ever notice the coach barely even looks? He's like, next guy, get in there.

[A]

Yeah, get in there.

[B]

Jennings, when do you break.

[A]

When do you break it to the boilermaker squad that you got to leave early because you have a cold reading class?

[B]

But, but you want. You wandered off.

[A]

You're like, guys, I saw Hamlet last night. And they're like, huh? It's like a movie. You're like, I think that's my calling. They're like, get the out of here.

[C]

That's fucking. That's funny.

[B]

So tell me about you. You wandered off the job site.

[C]

I think I got hurt. I actually got hurt. I got hurt. I hurt my back and. And I couldn't do that heavy work anymore. I sort of walking with a cane, right? And I'm about to, I don't know, 23. And my dad, My dad said, go to college. I was living down in Belfast and he said, go to Cerritos College. That's where he learned to weld.

[A]

He's the best brainstormer we got.

[B]

So he wants to go back to welding school. You got a back back and a can go to Harvard.

[C]

He doesn't want me to go to welding school. That's where he learned to weld. He goes, just go to school, get finish your education, you know. And that's where the real, you know, you don't want to do this your whole life anyway. But that, that little junior college is where I discovered acting. I met some actors who invited me to a improv class. And, man, as soon as I walked in there, you know, I didn't act in high school or anything like that. As soon as I walked in there, I just said, fucking, this is for me, you know, because I always made my buddies laugh and things like that. And I signed up for all the acting classes, and I swear to God, two months later, I'm in Hair. They did a great, you know, production of Hair. Hey, give me a head with hair.

[A]

Long, beautiful hair.

[C]

You got it down.

[B]

That was perfect. You guys are. Can you guys harmonize?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Hair. Hair.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Everyone's got a bush. Is that one of the lines I didn't see?

[C]

That's one of the lines that they did on Broadway.

[B]

Why does it sound like Nathan Lane or something? I don't know. I'm gonna sing a song. All right, go ahead. So you're doing here at a junior college. You got no other prospects, but you're loving it.

[C]

Oh, yeah, I'm doing hair. I did actually go to hair school, but I wasn't doing here at the junior.

[B]

Well, we'll get to your. Your that in a second.

[C]

That's crazy. What happens? What happens? I do it for about a year. Check it out. I sign up for extra work, right? So I start doing extra work. I'm on chips, I'm on Cagney and Lacey. It's sweet. Did you ever do extra work?

[A]

I don't think so, no, because we

[B]

were doing stand up, you know.

[C]

Okay, so. And here's the great thing about extra work. I mean, how crazy is this? I even did extra work on Square Pegs with Sarah Jessica Parker And I think 84 or 5, stuff like that, right? Yeah. And so here's the great thing about extra work. If you show up and just shut the up and mind your business and open your eyes, you can learn 35 bucks a day. I remember the extra pay. You can learn a lot. You can learn what this guy's doing holding this microphone. And you know what a key grip is. And that's what I did. I used that as. I mean, I knew what everybody did by the time I got my first, you know, one line on. On a movie, so.

[A]

But, you know, the. The real stuff. Sorry to interrupt you.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

But I made me think that's really how you learn just how an actual set works. Not acting class where you go, oh, they do a few takes. That guy comes over and tells. They change their delivery. Okay, that seemed to work better. So you realize, oh, this is how fast it works. This is how people get talked to. This is the hierarchy. And then when you get on a set, you're not totally blindsided.

[B]

Like, we all were intimidated by that environment. You know, I was.

[C]

Oh, my God, after like, two years extra work, you know, and still hadn't really gotten. You know, here's the great thing, too, about. We all have this feeling, right? When you're an extra, you just know somebody's going to see your potential and see the star. That sky is a star, man. It's gonna happen. And it just, you know, it never does. Right. But you. But. But by the end of, like, two years of doing extra work, man, you could put me in a scene with Robert De Niro, even though I'd never been on camera except as an extra. And I had just had so much confidence of being on the set. You're right, David. That's. It gives you so much confidence.

[B]

Well, it's kind of like it's. It's magic in a way. And then if you're watching actors and you go, oh, they're just gonna. They're just talking and that. They're just repeat. I mean, I. I did a movie with Burt Lancaster and Kirk Douglas. I was so scared. And then we're doing a scene, and it's like, I'm telling you where to rub the train. He just said it like that. Then he said it like that 10 more times. And then Kirk Douglas, I think we gotta rub the train. So I was like, this is cook dogs and Burt Lancaster. I mean, that's it.

[A]

Yeah. But if you're reading a script along. Dana, like, if you. I've done this where I had two lines and something. So I'm just. I'm just sort of reading the script, watching from the side and the way they do it compared to how it is on the. Where I read it, my head, I go, oh, they're putting a little spin on that. Oh, they're. Oh, that's not how I pictured that line. Oh, they went down on that. And that's kind of little things you pick up. You go, oh, like you do in acting class. You learn Stuff you don't even think you would learn. And you go, oh, that, that helped me.

[C]

But check this out, though. Here's the thing. When did you find this? With Kirk Douglas and Lancaster.

[B]

Burt Lancaster.

[C]

Burt Lancaster. When you get on the set, you know, if you. David, even if you've had a month's worth of acting classes, right. You can now do a monologue. You can do a fucking scene when you get on set and you see that these guys can't even say two fucking lines without fucking it up. Like, yeah, no, I just worked in steel factory, 60 hours a week. That's hard work. These guys can't even string two lines together. And when you see, you know, I mean, it's just. That's just the way it is. I'm still.

[A]

The laziness, the blatant laziness.

[B]

If you can act, this is for kids listening. If you can act for 20 seconds, that's it. You can, you can own Hollywood.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

All you need is 20 seconds.

[A]

Cut. And it doesn't hurt your back usually. So you're like, why did I. Why was I doing that other.

[C]

Yeah, a 22nd increment kind of deal. So would you ask me what. So my teacher came to me and she said her name was Georgia. Well, and she said, look, I think you.

[A]

And you're like. And that was the beginning of every girl hitting on me for the rest of my life.

[B]

Yeah. Well, we'll get to the ladies later. But he's happily married.

[A]

Yes, I know. I love Bo. Yeah.

[C]

She says, she says, she says, she says, you gotta. I think you could do this, but you got. You know, I'm living 30 miles south of Hollywood and I've been there four years, been at Hollywood twice. Wants to walk around and look at the stars on Hollywood Boulevard. And another time to see. To see a taping of Family Feud with Richard Dawson. Right. That's my.

[B]

Wow.

[C]

Yeah, it might as well be 300 miles away. When you live down Long beach, you just never go. Yeah, you know, what are you gonna do? Go to Shaky's Pizza Parlor? I mean, there's. There's nothing there. And she said, you got. So, you know, I had a nice. I mean, I was making 20 bucks an hour in 1980 working that steel factory. I had a nice little condo. She. She says, you gotta. You gotta move up there and you gotta take acting classes because time's ticking. You know, you should have started this at 18. And I did it. I fucking moved to Westwood.

[A]

Scary. But that's probably the best advice if

[C]

If I shouldn't give me that advice that we wouldn't be talking right now just would have never happened. I would have been too afraid to make a big move like that. But I moved to Westwood and moved in with. There was five of us, me and four 18 year olds in a two bedroom apartment. They were all going to UCLA and I was in the bedroom with three guys. I enrolled in hair school. Down in hair school.

[B]

You enrolled in hair school even though you're thinking of.

[A]

I like. He throws it in like it's the most normal move. That's probably.

[B]

His dad called him no school. We all try to get a. I started making handmade gloves before. I know for snl I had to have something to fall back. So you're confident but you go to hair school. Just in case it doesn't work out, here's what happens.

[C]

So because of the accident, you know, I sued the company and I got a nice sack of cash, right? Okay.

[B]

More than 100,000 or less.

[C]

It was about. It was about 100,000 of which I got about $33,000. Right?

[B]

Okay.

[C]

They get some and everybody gets a little. And I got that. But you know, my rent is at this place is 3, 300amonth, you know, with the guys. So I'm doing all right. But the girlfriend that I had at the time was a hairdresser who made it down in Long Beach. She made a good living at it, right? So I know I'm not going to be on a TV show anytime soon. And I think I like what she does. It's kind of creative. I love shampoo and, and I think

[A]

that the movie shampoo. Yeah, yeah.

[B]

Oh, yeah. Great.

[C]

You're great. I can cut hair to all the. I knew one thing's going to happen. There was money in people in show businesses pockets and I was going to fucking take some of it out one way or another.

[A]

I was going to be an actor

[C]

or I was going to be a hairdresser on movie sets. You know, I'm getting some of that cash that they have because now that's looking good, man.

[A]

Oh, no, John. I just took my hat off because I thought it was rude. I'm wearing a hat.

[C]

No, I like it. I like, I like the. I like the height.

[A]

Me and Dana have the interchangeable hair,

[B]

so we get a lot of heights.

[C]

There's nobody you've ever had on this podcast, by the way, out of 150 of them that knows hair more than I do.

[A]

You both, you nail it. I love it.

[C]

You both have Great hair.

[B]

Do you. Okay, so you, then you become a professional and you're, you're, you're working in a salon and you're, you're kind of like. And you're, you're young, strapping young man, six foot five. So you're a little bit like warm Beatty and shampoo at that point.

[C]

That's right.

[B]

There's nothing more seductive than cutting a woman's hair.

[A]

And you're straight and then, and that's so rare. So these girls are all coming in and talking. You're just meeting girl. I mean, that's like, that's all you do all day.

[C]

That is not correct. I am, I am working. I'm working. You guys know where that little restaurant by the Beverly center is called Jan's? It's right.

[A]

Kind of a casual.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

Like a little diner, right? So we're sharing the hair school. We're sharing the parking lot with Jan. It's like, I don't know, Beverly and La Cienega. So I'm right in the Jewish area of, of Beverly Hills. So every. Not hot chicky, but every client I have is a little old Jewish lady who's coming in for a three dollar set, right? And I'm gonna get, I'm gonna get a dime and maybe quarter for a tip, right? So I, the whole time I'm there, I'm working on 60 year old ladies.

[B]

Oh, yeah. We were off by a little bit, John.

[A]

I was picturing Instagram. I mean, the money that goes into it now with everyone around town, like there's so much money being spent on hair and coloring and all that stuff. Yeah.

[C]

There was a guy at this particular time in Giuseppe Franco. You ever heard this guy? Oh, yeah, very famous. Mickey works his best friend. This is 1985, and he's getting 35 bucks a haircut back then, and nobody could believe he was making, getting that paid that much for a haircut. Crazy.

[A]

Wow. I think, I think that's on Canon. Maybe that. Maybe that's.

[C]

It's still there. It's still there. Yeah.

[B]

You might laugh at this. When I first got a little extra money, I would have someone come to my house. This is me in the 80s. Little SNL money.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And it was like $400. What? I didn't even. I. Maybe. I don't know what I was thinking.

[A]

Clinton, remember he got a. His haircut on the Air force because it's $400.

[B]

The guy brings a. He. The leather pouch has like 90 scissors in it. And he's going around My ear with little tiny scissors. And he often. I would bleed and I'd still pay him and I'd have to, you know, I was dabbing cotton. Anyway, so go. So you're doing that and so here's what. What's your. What's your first move in. In Hollywood then? What are you gonna say?

[C]

So back then you had to. You had to go into a guy's office and do a scene if you wanted to try to get an agent. Hardest things in the world, moving to Hollywood. For anybody listening, here's your two toughest things get getting an agent and getting your SAG card. They're almost impossible things to do, right?

[A]

Without help, without some sort of help, without.

[C]

Without knowing anybody, no connections. Yeah, it's an impossible task. But back then you would. I only did it once. I had this old timey agent named Dick Dunn who referred to himself in the third person as old Dick Dunn. Old Dick Dunn always returns his calls. Old Dick Dun.

[B]

I want to make that a character.

[A]

Dana wants to play him already.

[B]

Yeah. Dick Dunn doesn't do that. Dick Dunn goes over here. Dick Dunn gets it done. Dick Dunn drives himself to work. Old Dick done. Okay, done.

[A]

I'll give you a Dick down.

[B]

Old Dick done had a farm. Ei, EI yourself. So. So what? What? So he's your agent now, Dick Dunn.

[C]

So old Dick Dunn, I go in a new scene and he's my guy. And old Dick Dunn has an office up on the end of Sunset for it goes into Beverly Hills, right across from the old Jaguar place. I don't know if that's still there, but do you know where I'm talking about?

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, of course.

[C]

Check this out. Oh, Dick Dunn used to say, hey, come down to the office today at noon. We're going to lunch. And I'd go down at noon. This is probably night. Yeah, this is 1985. Guess who's in the office. And we're going to go down and have lunch at the old Hamburger Hamlet at the end there. Remember that?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh, yeah, yeah, definitely.

[C]

I walk in, Vincent Price, so he's friends with Dick Dunn. He goes, come on, we're coming. You're coming with me and Vince. We're going down here. I get to go hang out with a couple times. This happened with Vincent Price.

[B]

Hi, I'm Vincent Price. No, I don't do it.

[A]

I'd like the curly fries. We're dealing.

[B]

We're dealing with a very unusual situation. It's slightly Peter Lori a little bit.

[A]

Yeah, you know, Hamburger Hamlet had you were over there by Abrams artist too, which was kind of by that vicinity. There was Lome, which someone told me Elton John ate there for lunch once. And I kept going, someone take me to that place so I can see Elton John real life and hamburger Hamlet. Dean Martin was there once.

[C]

Oh, did you see him?

[A]

Yeah. So it's the same thing. It's like you can randomly, you get these agents that their whole life is based on lunch. They go, let's go to lunch. And then they go to, they get out and show off their new clients, which you look like a big stud he's walking on. He's. It's my new guy. It's my new guy. But he knows Vincent Price, which is pretty cool.

[B]

Yeah. So you're, you're hanging out with old Dick Dunn and Vincent Price in 1985.

[A]

Basically DiCaprio's squad.

[C]

Here's the craziest part. I looked it up recently because he was such an old man to me, right. You know, he was a little hunched over. I looked it up. I'm 63. He was a year younger than me when we were going to lunch and he seemed ancient. Was a year younger than me. So bizarre. So, so here's what happens. The old Dick done, he's, he's sending me out for things. And halfway through hair school I get a commercial, right? So I get this commercial for Samsung Electronics. I shoot it in one afternoon. And you know, hair school takes about a year to get out of. So halfway through hair school, when I graduate from hair school, this, this commercial starts running. And so I'm working in this salon. I go to work at the salon on Melrose in Blessing and called on Mars and what our biggest client was this rock and roll kid named Charlie Sexton. You remember this kid at all?

[A]

Oh hell yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Be so lonely.

[C]

Be so lonely. Oh, I love that. You know that Charlie was our guy. I used to wash Charlie's hair for him. I'm making 150 a week in this hair salon hoping for some walk ins which hardly ever happened because it's on the third floor of this building. So walk ups.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

Nobody's walking in, so I'm basically too tall.

[A]

That place.

[B]

No, I can't even get up the stairs for my haircut.

[C]

No, my little Jewish ladies aren't coming there anymore.

[B]

Oh, they're coming. Yeah.

[C]

Now I'm in the hip flag place. But it's all appointments for the three other hairdressers that are working there who are booked all day long. And I'm, you know, I'm sweeping up hair and you know, throw it in

[A]

trash can and wait for what ends of Charlie Sexton is a new kid in town.

[C]

The new kid's got to be the shampoo boy too. So I'm shampooing everybody's heads and towels around them. Here's the thing that I'm 150 a week. Two months I'm working in salon. The commercial starts playing. Eight grand a month I get for two months for this thing. For this thing I worked six hours on and I quit. I quit that job. And now one commercial.

[B]

Did you throw off your, did you throw off down your scissors and throw, throw a shot and did you do a few Norma Ray, guess what? You all so great. That's fucking, that's that eight grand, that's

[A]

what gets you addicted. You go, holy crap.

[B]

I, there's money in them there hills.

[C]

I'm still in the $300 a month place, right? So, yeah, and I still got a nice little. I got, I got.

[B]

Do you have any shoes with diamonds on them?

[C]

Yeah, and I got a little leftover from this, from the sack of gold from the, from the lawsuit, right. So like I'm not gonna do this hair deal and I'm kind of, you know, going out on auditions and stuff. I got my cheap little headshot. But another mistake. Young people who are listening, coming to Hollywood just know this. It's not going to happen. You're not going to have a 40 year career where you only get to act and live in a, in a multi million dollar house. And that just, it's, it's, it's like telling, it's like telling a kid who's standing in line for the five o', clock, you know, Comedy Store there to do open mic night. Like this probably is not. You're not going to do this for 30 years and live in a million dollar house. You kind of just got to know that that's not going to happen. It's, you know, for the three of us, it happened. But there's a lot, so many reasons why it probably shouldn't have happened. Right?

[A]

Right. It's a possibility, but it's very, very tough. And they see people like you. They see people and they go, it can happen. And that keeps people going. And if they're good, I think if you're good, someone finds you. Advice I used to get was like, how do you do this?

[C]

How do this?

[A]

I go, people will find you if you're good at something. Like your teacher realized you had something. And sometimes in comedy I see people and I go, I think this guy's going to make it. But, but you can't. It's not just about do it a lot. It is about doing a lot. But if you have something, I think the word gets around somehow, right?

[B]

But it's, it's tough.

[A]

I mean, long shot. Fuck.

[B]

I, I, I, I think it, I think it's emotionally violent to do this career. I was in this acting class at San Francisco State and this actress came in and she's somebody you might recognize or did a few commercials. First time I'd heard this. If you can do anything else with your life, do that. But if you can't live without trying, show business, go ahead. That's how. But she had a cigarette and she looked pretty boost up. But anyway, go ahead. Well, it ain't easy, kids.

[A]

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[A]

all right now before we get back, we have a message from Ashley the Mosquito about Orkin. Hey besties. Hope all of you are high key. So excited for summer. It's literally giving all of us mosquitoes life. So we thought we'd help everybody make the most of it before Orkin pros try to ruin our fun. Remember, if you have standing water on your lawn from the pool or the sprinkler, just let it sit there. The more the merrier. When they're standing water, there'll be more mosquitoes. Plenty more. Next up is a bit of a hot take, but we're so hyped on it. Let mosquitoes inside. What could go wrong? Just let us inside, please. Thanks. Love you.

[B]

Finally, the number one rule this summer is do not under any circumstances speak to anybody from Oregon. That is literally so cringe. It will ruin the vibe of any get together we might be having. Take it from a mosquito. Orkin pros know literally everything about us, period. Don't visit orkin.com for a free estimate today.

[A]

Now let's Go suck some blood

[B]

now. Let's go suck some blood. Number one with a blood bullet

[A]

stuff. So here you are, you now you got a commercial under your belt.

[C]

Yeah, I got a commercial under my belt. And you know, I don't know a year, a year's worth of Hollywood acting classes, right? But here's the mistake that, that everybody makes that old Dick Dunn's now he's got some connections, right? So he's sending me out for. Hollywood's such a small little town back in the 80s. It's even smaller now in some ways for, let's say casting directors. You guys know this for casting directors, there's 12 or 15 of them, right? So Dick Dunn's sending me out for pilots and stuff because, you know, I'm a tall, half decent looking white guy, right? So back then, that was most of every. Every pilot had a roll for a guy like that. But I'm not ready. You know, I'm walking in there too green, I'm green. My hands are shaking. The script, I'm forgetting where I am. I'm pouring sweat like broadcast news. And the mistake is these guys now have seen me and you only get that, you know, saying you only get

[A]

one first shot once for shot to

[C]

make a good impression. So they're never bringing me back. You know, every time I go in there, they're like, no, you know, you, you can just tell when somebody's ready. You see a guy on, on, on any open mic night, you guys know, like, fuck, this guy's got something or he's got a long way to go too early. Yeah, so that was my big mistake, you know, and, well, not my mistake because I was learning, you know, but that's my advice also to people, like, don't come to Hollywood and go get that headshot before you take like three years of acting classes before we get

[B]

to your, your success. Northern Exposure and stuff. I know that you did work doing lighting at the railings and when Phil Hartman and John Lovitz were there.

[C]

So this is a great story. Now, now we, now we got something.

[B]

This is snl, baby adjacent.

[C]

Yeah, this is snl. Fucking.

[B]

So why were you working there if you were so flush and doing commercial?

[A]

Yeah, well, you didn't run out of that 8k that got taxed, did you?

[C]

It goes like this. So my buddy wants to go see the movies, right? Remember we used to go to the movies and see if, look at the posters and go, yeah, let's go see this one, right? Yeah, yeah, so we do that and Then there's this movie with this guy, and it's called, you know, peewee's Big Adventure. I said. He goes, let's go see it. And I said, no, fuck, let's go see whatever else is playing. That's a fucking kids movie. He says, I don't think it's a kids movie. I think it's something else. So we go. It's like fucking that first showing, 10:30 or 11:00'. Clock. I can't remember what theater was somewhere in Hollywood. We go see this movie. And I sit there, my fucking jaw drops. I can't even understand, like, what I'm seeing, right? Because this character is, you know, it's so dimensional. And this fucking guy. Who is this guy? We sit through like three. Three of them. We sit through three of those screenings and probably went back a couple times and took other people. But what you got to remember is. And nobody understands it, you know, today, except, you know, this age range. Once you walk out of that theater and you're going, who's Peewee Herman? You got no way to look up who this guy is. You know, there's. There's no little thing you can touch and Google them. Yeah, what do you go find information

[A]

in 1985 plus, I thought, he's a real guy. I didn't think he's playing anyone. I was too new. I was just like, that's a real guy. You know, I didn't think it was a Paul Reubens.

[B]

That's funny.

[C]

Or. So there is no Paul Rubens. There's the only Peewee Herman. Yeah, I'm not even sure I knew this, you know, reading in the credits that this guy's name was Paul Rubens. So we, you know, we can't find out anything about this guy. And not too long after that, my buddy says, hey, there's this. There's this place where this guy named Paul Rubin, who's playing Peewee, studied acting and. And does skits called the Grounding. It's right. Groundlings. It's on Melrose. Let's go check it out. He'll probably be there, right?

[A]

Yeah, for sure.

[B]

So we.

[C]

I know. So we go there.

[A]

It makes sense.

[B]

Yeah, it makes sense so far. It tracks.

[C]

It's tracking. We're going to go see this guy. So we go. It's a Friday night. I remember it was a Friday night. We get some tickets. I think they're fucking seven or ten dollars to go see the Groundlings. You guys have. You guys have been to the Groundlings?

[B]

Yep.

[C]

So we walk in this theater. It's a very tiny theater. For anybody listening, it's never been there. And at this time, nobody's talking about the Groundlings, right? So now everybody has some kind of reference because of all the Saturday Night Live aluminum. But you. You know, it's a very small theater. There's an aisle up the middle. It's about 99 seats, and there's 50 seats on each side up a little incline.

[B]

It's tiny, intimate.

[C]

Very tiny intimate. So we get in there and. And we're looking around. Ah, Peewee's not here. And the show starts. I'm sure he's not there. The show starts and I watch once again. I can't believe what I'm seeing. So it's. It's about a half hour. I'm sorry, I guess it's 45 minutes or so of sketch, right? And then they take a little intermission and then come back. And this fella stands up and starts saying, you know, give me a place, give me a town, give me a job. And they're doing some of the best improv I've ever seen because I have only been in classes, right. With people who don't know what the fuck they're doing.

[A]

It looks like a magic trick. It's unbelievable. How craz. Crazy as you go. How are they doing this?

[C]

It is a magic trick because they've studied, you know, how to produce the, you know, rabbits from the hat. I mean, they, you know. Yeah, this. The gimme a scenario, as you know, is. Is also a trick. It's like you say anything, you know. Yeah, yeah, but it's. But they're seeming like geniuses at this point.

[A]

Yeah, of course.

[C]

So after the show, there's going to be another show. We're at the early show. After the show, we go out and the audience is clearing out, and this fella who's saying, give me a name, give me a place comes out in the thing. And I go up to him and I say, hey, I love the show. Is there. I could tell he's kind of in charge. It turns out this fella's name's Tom Maxwell, who at the time is like a founding member of the Groundlings and the sort of guy, their director, right. Of everything. But I just know he's the guy that was leading the band. And so I said, is there any. Is there any job that I could do here? I love this. I want to be around this. And he said. He looks me up and down. He says, are you available every weekend? And I Said, yeah. He says, my spot. Guys leaving. You ever work a spotlight? And I said, no. He said, can you come tomorrow night for the first show? Get here about 6 o' clock and you're going to do two weeks with my spotlight guy and you're going to take over the spotlight. I said, yeah. He goes, you're also going to sell candy and beer at the intermissions. And he says, you good with that? And I said, yeah. He goes, 35 bucks to show cash, so 70 bucks a night. You good with that? And I go, yeah. He goes, I'll see you tomorrow. And I came back the next day and I learned how to fucking do the spotlight, which is much more intricate than you would think because, you know, now you're, now you're doing a dance, right, with, with, with the performers. So I might have been, it might have happened before me, but I, I don't remember, like love. It's for example, doing hello, hello. That's the thespian. Jealous. So when. So for instance, you know, Hartman would probably say, and now a word from, from Liars Anonymous, right? And at that beat, it's a dark theater. Bang. That spotlight has to come on exactly where Lovett's is going to be, right? And I got to know his act and I got to know what his last goodbye line is. And bang. Spotlight goes out. Stages dark for a minute. You know, there's a little booth next to me where guys are also operating the main lines, right? So I gotta learn this, this act and for the whole, you know, for the whole show. And it was just fucking amazing. And I don't know how long I was there before one weekend Lovitz is gone, right? It's like, where's John? He's got an audition for Saturday Night Live. Now in my mind, this, this is not possible because you know that you

[A]

have run across in the world. It might be on Saturday Night Live, right?

[C]

Might be on Saturday Live. One of my favorite shows that I have watched since the day it came on in 1975, I believe it was October, because I'm about 14 or 15 and to this fucking day have probably never missed an episode. I mean, I still get excited when I wake up on Saturdays. I'm not bullshitting that tonight is a. Is a new fucking episode of Saturday Night Live with somebody, Josh Brolin maybe. And all day long I'm like, fuck, it's coming on soon. I'm still like a 14 year old boy when it's on you guys like that at all.

[A]

I love.

[B]

Well, if I go back there.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

If I go back there and I hear that theme music.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Lauren talks to me and I go in 8h. Yeah, it's heady, heady stuff. There's nothing like it. But the interesting part of that is that you're seeing Phil Hartman and John Lovett's Pre Night Live working together. And then I think there was at one point you were there, I don't know, around this time, and you were having an argument with your girlfriend at the Ground Lanes in the hallway and said something happened.

[A]

Oh, yeah. Dana, sore subject.

[B]

What was that story? Just an argument getting a little loud. And then what happened?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Well, so, yeah, that's funny. So love it. So from this time, there's only a couple people that are going to know Isaiah at the Groundlings. Phil wasn't one of them because I didn't have much exchange with him. But Lovett's Kathy Griffin. George McGrath. Do you know that guy? George McGrath.

[A]

He's a Simpsons guy I always heard about.

[C]

I know Simpsons guy and he, he wrote a lot of the peewee stuff.

[A]

People thought he's great writer.

[C]

Yeah, great writer and even better performer. Should have been on Saturday Night Live. Why?

[A]

Oh, I didn't know he's a performer.

[C]

Oh, my God. One of the best. One of the best. So in the back of these stairs at the ground where you work in, the spotlight goes down to where the cast is, you know, Phil and John would sneak up, you know, individually to kind of watch the show if they weren't on for a while. And I would kind of have this rap with John.

[A]

Right.

[C]

And so we sort of had a thing. Phil would come up and I liked shoes, right. I always bought like thrift store shoes. And Phil would always notice my shoes, like executive wingtips or some two tone shoes.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

And he'd say, every time he'd say, hey, nice shoes. He'd whisper to me because the audience is also sitting right below me. He'd say, I'd say, thanks, thanks, and say, would you get those? And I like.

[B]

He wants a pair.

[C]

Yeah, I, I, I like the shop, this place called Ardvarks that used to be on Melrose.

[A]

I remember Aardvarks. Where do you get those shoes, fella?

[B]

Yeah, I like the shoes. Yeah. Little chick hazard infill. Yeah.

[C]

So every time you. Because as he's coming up these stairs, you know, he's seen my feet FL first before he gets to the top. And so every time I started found myself like trying to wear nice shoes when I'D work because I thought Bill might notice.

[A]

Yeah, what a great reason to talk.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

And every time he'd come up almost and he'd look down shoes and he'd say, aardvarks. And I'd say, yeah, but I was more friendly with love.

[A]

Three bucks.

[C]

So.

[B]

So anyway, what about the argument with the girlfriend?

[C]

Yeah, this, that I'm. So I'm with this girlfriend, but this time I'm famous, right. Because I'm on Northern Exposure for about two years. So John and Phil are hosting this thing in like Montana. One of these things you guys get paid for to come host the charity event, right?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And I'm with this girlfriend and we're arguing in the hall out loud, kind of yelling. And the door pops open and it's Lovett's. And he says, hey. He goes, get in here. And so we both come into the, into the room. So you guys do love it's all the time, right? And so the world kind of thinks of love. It says, you know, jealous.

[B]

Hello, Jealous. Yeah, that guy, right, that he.

[C]

And he's like that on talk show. So they don't know there's another side of this guy.

[A]

Yep.

[C]

And Lovett's for about an hour was like a therapist to us, telling us why we should be kind to each other, how to get through this thing. It was like every self help book you've ever read, because I've read a ton of them in an hour. I mean, I just always remember that, that he did that, you know, you know, that side of it, right.

[A]

He's like that. He's like a fix it guy. If you say something's wrong, goes. I'm going to give you a list of three doctors that you should see tomorrow. And I'm going to call them ahead of time. And I'm like, oh, okay. So he really gets into things and he's very like an earnest person. Yeah, that, that seems a little different than his Persona.

[B]

So you're trying to get the power over. You should accept the power. I could just see him. Yeah. Why do you fight?

[A]

You need to. You're lucky to have someone. You know, he. Yeah, he does get in that. He's not that broad, but he comes. Yeah, he will have a talk with you. I agree. You're right on that story.

[C]

It was, it was just amazing. And I bumped into him a few times since then, you know, because where we live, we're just so far out, out of Hollywood by, you know, a lot of hours. But I always remember him until they stick me in the ground that he was. Took the time to be so sweet like that.

[B]

That's. I see. Sean, if you're listening.

[A]

There you go.

[B]

So you have such a big resume here, I don't even know where to start.

[A]

Let's talk about this fat resume.

[C]

Damn.

[A]

The first big one was Northern Exposure.

[B]

The controversy of. With Rob Lowe. I don't know if it's a known controversy, but it's not really.

[C]

But hey, wait, let me tell you guys one thing. We. We. We shared. The three of us shared a space in the early 90s. I think you know this, Dana, but I'm going to reveal it. We shared in space in the early 90s for one of the most iconic things in rock and roll that ever happened. You know what it is? David Spade?

[A]

Uh, I do not.

[C]

The three of us were at the 1992 MTV Awards that some people say were the best awards ever.

[A]

The one Dana hosted.

[C]

The one Dana host that I presented to Van Halen. You did skits, you did the welcoming guy and.

[A]

Oh, that a receptionist. And I also was trying to help write Dana jokes, I think. Dana, right. I was supposed to be on.

[B]

And you did that. I played drums with you, too.

[C]

You got Nirvana, you got Nirvana, Black crows, Elton John. Guns and roses.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Shit.

[B]

20,000 cedar.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

Oh, you got fucking Eric Clapton. I mean, it was. It was. Yeah, it was. It was a 20,000 seater. That was an. It was Poly Pavilion.

[A]

They were a big deal. That was a big deal.

[C]

That was a very big deal. Howard Stern. Fartman came down.

[B]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[A]

All the same one.

[C]

Wow.

[B]

Yes. I can't unsee that.

[A]

So much more fun then. It feels like. I didn't know what the MTV Awards. They even do them anymore.

[B]

So then here's another 3 degrees since we're in this section.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

Your wife was on, thankfully. Did a part in a movie I did called Master of Disguise, where she. She starts the movie and. And runs away in the night and stuff and then goes in a car and it's like. She goes like this, and then suddenly it's James Brolin. So. As if James Brolin was doing a disguise. So he's Bo Derek. David worked with her on Tommy Boy. And then. So we also have that connection to beautiful.

[C]

We have that connection.

[B]

And you're married to her. But we. We. We. I met her.

[C]

I was. So the other night when we watched. When we watched Tommy Boy, we were talking about some stuff, and I remember on your podcast, somebody. I don't remember who it was, was Talking about Beau's short hair in Tommy Boy.

[A]

Right?

[C]

And. And that John had said, I don't want you to look like a movie star, cut your hair short. And. And she said that didn't happen like this. Here's what happened. Let's see if you guys know. So Bo is in Paris doing pre production on a movie, right. That she's going to do a couple months from now. But she thought she should have short hair. So she cuts her hair and she's trying it out and she said about a week later she gets a phone call. We wanna. We want you to offer you this movie, but if you say yes, you. You've got to get on a plane and tomorrow and fly to Toronto from Paris and start. And start that afternoon. Which she did. She said yes to it. And she said she landed in Toronto in the morning and by the afternoon she was shooting the swimming pool scene. Right. Wow.

[B]

Right?

[A]

Sounds familiar. Yeah.

[C]

So for all these years, as we know, acting, how acting goes, you don't get a call 12 hours before. So she was obviously replacing somebody.

[A]

I was wondering, are you gonna ask me who she covered? I don't know. I don't know who fell out. Do you know? Because I don't know who could beat Bo Derek.

[C]

So. So Bo's fantastic manager. I don't even know if you know this, but was the great Bernie Brostein, right?

[B]

Oh, we.

[A]

Oh, it was.

[C]

He was, yeah.

[A]

Oh, wow. That all ties together. Okay.

[B]

Bernie.

[C]

Well, so Bernie only had two women, apparently. According to Bernie, who we've had so many dinners with. I fucking love that guy.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Bernie had Gilda and Beau, the only two women he's ever represented. I think that's pretty cool.

[A]

Shit.

[B]

That's. That's.

[A]

That's a good group.

[C]

So, Dan, it. I mean, David, you don't know who

[A]

Beau replaced if you tell me maybe to ring a bell. But I just. It's. Bo is so ingrained in my head

[C]

for that Raquel Welch.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

Do I remember anything about Raquel Welch?

[B]

Wow.

[A]

I don't think that got. I don't think I got cc'd on that didn't come across my desk. I was in the same boat. They're going, get the. Over there and cut your hair and go get your fittings and learn your lines. And then they're like, I think. And I think we were like, wait, who's the person that's playing this? Who's this? Because we didn't know. We. We got. We had one girl. We knew that we got as the girl that we both flirt with at the pool. But other than that we didn't know anyone. We didn't know Julie Warner was in my acting class, though that's not why she got it. But we knew her. Rob Schneider was in there in Ivana Chubbuck's class. And then. So I was like. When they. Her name came up, I said, oh, I think she's great. She came in, Farley loved her. And Bo came in and Beau came into a shitstorm. That's so nice. She just said yes, by the way, because it was kind of a gamble.

[C]

Yeah, well, she had time off for this other thing that never actually happened. Here's the other thing. Bo said she was only supposed to be there for a week. She said, I was fucking there for 10 weeks.

[A]

On Tommy Boy.

[C]

On Tommy Boy. And she. Then she started flying home and coming back for just those few little scenes that she's in. She's probably in five little scenes. She said she was there for 10, 10 weeks. And I've heard you on the thing saying before how you guys would fly back to do the show and then come back on on Saturday night and be exhausted. Unless Farley went the same party.

[B]

When is he.

[A]

When he wanted to go to the after party. We were dead. Yeah, we gotta go for one minute.

[B]

Lauren will get mad.

[A]

I go, lauren doesn't know what the. Who we are.

[C]

I said, what do you, what do you remember about Chris? And here's what she said about each of you. She said, the crazy thing I remember is this is 95, so it's not like you could get an espresso machine stuff now. She said he wanted an espresso machine. And she goes, they got him like a fourteen thousand dollar espresso machine. And he would drink a bunch of espresso. And then she said his face would just get beat red and he'd like, you know, pull his hair up and stuff and go like, what are we doing? What are we waiting for?

[A]

Yeah, it was, it was a. She was exactly right. And the first day we had a three and a half page scene in the diner where I realized he's a good salesman and he's talking to the lady about chicken wings or whatever they are, wingy. And he was doing a shot of espresso between each take. And we were like, Chris, what are you doing? We both didn't really know how much fucking coverage we would do. We thought we'd do the scene a few times. Everyone's like, great job. But that was a master and Then they push in and do a medium shot. Then they push over me and do my. Over the shoulder of Chris, then a tight, and then turn around, do me and then me as a wide. And then the two of us in a side shot and then the waitress this way and then that way. And we had no idea. So we're there for 16 hours and Chris is asleep at lunch going, what the fuck? We have more of this. We already did it a hundred times. I go, yeah, he peaked at 9am and we said, you can't. I said, I don't think you can have that cappuccino all day. You're going to have a heart attack. I said, that coupled with your salt imbalance leads to a weight problem. And so, yeah, so he, he goes, I gotta tone it down. But he would, he would drink all that in the morning and he would crash so hard at lunch that all the pas would be like, I'm not waking him up. Because you'd hear knock, knock, knocking.

[C]

You get the out of here.

[A]

And they're like, they need you. First team. So funny. And he come back so mad and

[B]

his hair coming out of his bo.

[A]

All I remember is Bo was being lovely and we were nervous around her and so. But she couldn't have been more sweet. And she might have felt like she's. Because she wasn't ever seeing that and these idiots, you know, like this goofy comedy. But I'm glad it actually worked out where she's part of it because over the years I always hear about it. It's very nice to hear about something like that. I'm glad she's part of it all.

[C]

I said, what do you remember about David mostly? And she said, I just remember a. A stead people, a steady stream of people. He's was eating more tuna fish sandwiches than I've ever seen anybody eat in their life. And he never put on a pound, but he was constantly eating tuna fish sandwiches.

[A]

It was the stress of the movie. My weight I was losing was going straight to Farley. So this Lauren would say, well, the weight stayed on screen. It just shifted from you to him. But he said, you were. You're like the number 10. It's a little skinny spade.

[B]

And then it became Laurel and Hardy.

[A]

Yeah, it was Lauren Harding and. And through them, you know, you're shooting the movie out of sequence. So we don't even know if it's any good. But we were stressed out of our fucking gourds.

[C]

Here's the funny. Here's. This is the funny thing. I want people who are listening to do. So I'm surprised there's not more outtakes and bloopers of you guys, because I looked them up online and there's really only one little set of like a three minute little put together of bloopers, right? Unless there's another one I couldn't find. But, you know, when you're making a movie, you're there for six weeks mostly 14 hours a day, and you don't move to the next scene. For people who aren't in showbiz, you don't move to the next scene till you shoot one of the things David was talking about, like two people sitting at a table, and then you'll shoot the other guy from another angle. And until you get that angle and then move it to another one, you don't even think about going outside to shoot the fucking scene in the rain with the deer or whatever.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

So when I watch these bloopers, you know, people who haven't made many movies, it's always.

[A]

I know what you're gonna say.

[C]

I don't know. Listen, it's always fun. It's always fun to. To up and laugh, right? But the more somebody laughs and fucks up a take, the more you gotta stay there and do it. And the. The clock just ticks. And sometimes you're going, man, we could have been out of here an hour. And I'm still trying to do this scene, right? So to watch Farley, you know, be like a little kid, because I was watching you. And yeah, I know you rarely fuck up, but Farley would constantly, like, machine gun laugh when he fucks up. And sometimes you laugh, but I'd look at your face and some of these, and you're just like looking straight ahead and he's like, in your ear with the ha.

[A]

I knew where you were heading with that because I saw the tape once and I was like, oh, my God, look, look at me. Because I'm just staring into space going, we're going again. Yeah, because you know, you can't get it and you can't move on, like you said. And it's three hours after we're supposed to wrap and we have to fly back to New York from Toronto. Yeah, I'm like, farley, just say it. And he thought it was the greatest joy in the world to up his lines and get the crowd laughing. He's like the mayor of the crowd. He's like, look at Chip over there. He's laughing, he knows what's going on. And I'm like, Farley, keep going. We gotta get this. And so I could see some of those. We would laugh. And some of those. We were just staring into space because we were in a daze, going, it's so long. It's so long.

[C]

Yeah. And there's one little thing where he's trying to pop that life preserver right in the movie. He just grabs a pen and it pops. But yeah, there's an outtake of him. And you could kind of see the

[A]

anger in him, which is he's getting mad.

[C]

He's like, this pen doesn't work. Or something like that.

[A]

Yeah, it wasn't sharp enough.

[C]

Yeah, it wasn't sharp enough. I love seeing those little intricate things in people.

[A]

Yeah. The behind scene. There's one time when I go, for some reason, when he goes, zielinski is. And I go. And he seems like a nice guy, and I go, he seems like a nice guy.

[B]

And.

[A]

And then he starts laughing. And then I start laughing because that's a genuine. We crack up. And he laughs.

[C]

What a dick. Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

But I'm like. And then I'm like, we got to get that again, because it sounded kind of funny. I hope they can keep that because. Because I'm trying to stay in it. And then he laughs so hard. I can't. I start laughing.

[C]

Oh, people look at it. There's a sweet one, too, where you're saying line, and then you whisper his line to him and he fucking throws himself down. And he's like, ah.

[A]

Because I would know his lines in my head. I'm like, just say this. And then I say this. And he's like, staring into space. I'm like, that blank look. He does not know what's next.

[C]

It's so great, people, good people listening. Just fucking punch it in and watch it.

[A]

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[A]

I. Dude, I have Ring. It's like all over the place. Because I like the zoom in. I like this. I like that. When I see a video online and they show ring, I go, it better be rings. I want them to push in, push out, move around, and that's, that's the stuff that matters. Especially if anything goes down.

[B]

Right.

[A]

You want to be able to go, I okay, who was it? Where was it? What are they driving? What are they doing?

[B]

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[A]

Sneaks up on me. Yeah, I know it is coming up. I'm trying to juggle plans, juggle meals and enjoy the weather. Instacart's made that easier. I can sit outside, build my car with everything I need for the week, not have to step away from what I'm doing.

[B]

I've been leaning on delivery through Instacart for meal prep, especially David, like getting fresh veggies, proteins, even those perfectly ripe avocado. I set my preferences once, and it's so seamless. It saves me a lot of time and makes sure I'm getting all the quality I want. And the convenience is huge.

[A]

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[B]

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[A]

Hey, before we jump back into the show, let's take a quick break. All right. Not just any break. This is a refreshing break with Snapple. We all know about Snapple's iconic real facts, so let's take a minute to go over some of my faves.

[B]

Snapple real fact 455 movie trailers used to come on at the end of the movies, but no one stuck around to watch them.

[A]

I've heard that. Snapple Real Fact 831 adults laugh only about 15 to 100 times a day, while preschoolers laugh an average of 300 times a day.

[B]

Snapple Real Fact 1983 the first player drafted to play pro football never played in the league.

[A]

That's interesting. Snapple Real fact 1274 kickball is referred to as soccer, baseball in some Parts of Canada. Hmm.

[B]

So grab a Snapple, take a second,

[A]

enjoy the moment, because let's be honest, this might be the most refreshing part of your day. Snapple, make your break more interesting.

[C]

All right, what do you want now?

[B]

Well, you've. Well, these are your tent poles, basically, for the general public. Northern Exposure won the Emmy. Your first huge job, obviously, Sex and the City and then revisiting it now, obviously, your time as a rock star, which is really interesting. Or a country music star. My Big fat Greek wedding 1 and 2. Jesus Parenthood. Kate Hudson Raising Helen. Tony Collette's husband in United States of Terror. Yeah. So it's, It's. We can't get to all of it, but that's okay.

[C]

There's a lot of on there. There's a lot of on there. Here's the thing, fellas. Yes. It's called Fly on the Wall. Right. So you got to reveal some stuff.

[A]

Right.

[C]

Or else we're just talking.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

The fact of the matter is I. I kind of picked. Look, I'm at the. I'm. I'm at the fourth quarter of the football game now, in life and in shows, and it's just a fact. So I can reveal now I picked the wrong thing to do with my life. Right. I mean, I really, you know, being an actor is. Is for once, since I was a kid, I hate to be told what to do by any authority figure. So I picked something to do with my whole life for my fulfillment of my work life, which is, dude, stand here, say this, put this on, look this way, say it faster, cut your hair like this. And there's not really, as an actor in my position, which is, you know, always second, third banana, hired hand.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah. I'm not Emma. Emma fucking Stone in, you know, in Pretty Poor Things. Poor Things, you know, where I'm. I'm collaborating. I'm not collaborating with the writers. I'm just fucking. Have you ever.

[B]

You feel like a puppet, you feel

[C]

like a puppet, but here's the. Here's the part of the puppet. Have you ever sat in a fucking waiting room of a doctor's office for like an hour and you're going, what the fuck? For me, that's what making a movie is like, because I'm not part of any creative process. And those minutes that we'll do the table and then they say, okay, we're going to turn around. We'll need you in two hours, that 14 hour day for those six weeks where for anybody listening, it's going to sound like I'M an ungrateful prick, but I'm just telling you, my work life, I made a lot of money, I live in a beautiful home, people come to me in every restaurant I go in, I'm a friend of the world. But as far as a fulfilling, creative work life, I didn't write one line, I didn't write one joke to make people laugh. So it's been unfulfilling on that level. Like all those things you, you mentioned, you know, there were some, you know, good times here and there, but most of it's sitting waiting for them to knock on your door to go, hey, we need you to come back and say that thing again. And to me, man, there's. It's such a boring life. Anybody listening has never been on a movie set. If you came to visit any one of us for two days, just two of those 14 hour days, you'd say, I never want to be here ever, ever again. This is like watching paint dry.

[B]

And it's just human, it's just human stuff. Did you ever have a director that you felt. Because I had this experience in my three movie career was actively had animus toward you, didn't really want to cast you, was kind of subtly sabotaging you. I mean, you get in scenarios where you really feel.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, many of them, many of them. But mostly they've got such, you know, look, I'm not a fucking movie actor. I've been in basically Big Fat Greek Weddings, the only movie. I'm really a television actor. And so, you know, that thing has to move quick and that guy's got to make a million decisions. And, you know, we're not shucking and jiving and going out for wine after. So, you know, I'm just at that point in my life now that, you know, I like being at home with, with Beau and the dogs. And I don't want to go to fucking Little Rock and stay. Even if, you know, even if you're in penthouse of the fucking Hyatt in Singapore and you're still not in your own fucking bed and you're gone for six weeks. And for me, I can't. Every day is like a guy like marking the wall, going like, I'll get out of here soon. So at this point in my life I'm just gonna, just sort of, you know, I ha. If something seems really, really fucking fun, I'll say yes. But then I get there and two days later I'm always saying, like, why did I fucking say yes? Because also that work life means you Know, at my best, I work five or six weeks a year, right? So saying I picked that unfulfilling thing to do. Like, here's the thing, I have to sit and wait for the phone to ring. And like in 22, it never rang once. So for that whole year I'm sitting, like, how do I get my. Besides playing the guitar and piano at home, how do I express myself? You guys can really, if you want to work 52 weeks a year, you can do it. You know, you can get a guy who books you, you can travel the country, you got to stay in a lot of Holiday Inns and you got to be on a lot of planes. And do you want to do that? But you can kind of control your own life, right? And yeah, as much as you want. But you know, do you want to be Carrot Top? Right, Carrot Top. Not taking anything away from fucking great. You know, what he does is great, but for 17 years he's been in Las Vegas doing 12 shows a week, pulling a lighted toilet seat out of a trunk. And it's, I mean, how exciting can that be for.

[A]

Don't give away his closer.

[B]

I, I would just say I'm gonna play something, John.

[A]

Oh, let's play something.

[B]

Because within all that, that which every, every actor, really, really incredibly successful ones like you, you've got a lot of nominations and stuff. This is a scene that I saw from Northern Exposure where your character predicts the future. And so I understand why you got the Emmy for that performance. It's not easy. So here it is.

[A]

Let me see this, John.

[B]

Predicting the future.

[A]

Okay, well, I have to tell you, Chris, I felt a little self conscious getting these.

[C]

I mean, technically I don't need to

[A]

own my own washer and dryer. But then I thought, why am I being so provincial? You know, it's a big luxury.

[C]

I grew up with a washer and dropped dryer engross. Gross point.

[B]

Smells new.

[A]

Like a new car. Look, it's so shiny, it makes me feel elegant.

[C]

That's the self affirming power of a new toy. That's life support system of the whole capitalist animal, huh? I mean, we think about it, the whole material gratification angle is just the tip of the iceberg. These babies here embody the whole wolf and warp of human development.

[B]

A washer and dryer.

[C]

Ever since the Pleistocene error. Homo erectus has been flocking it down to the local creek to beat their first skivvies against rocks. Right? Well, what's a laundromat except same old creek but with a Cheap tin roof over it, huh? Yeah, so. But this. This is progress. I mean, these two iron boxes, we've gone from communal suds to private spin cycle. We're on our total blitzk towards isolation.

[B]

You think?

[C]

Listen to me. The day's coming, and it ain't going to be long when you ain't even going to have to leave your living room. No more schools, no more bodegas, no more tabernacles, no more cineplexes. All right? You're going to snuggle up to your fiber optics, baby, and bliss out.

[B]

Whoa.

[A]

Wow.

[C]

Okay, that is a little prophetic. That's probably 1991 or so.

[B]

Yeah, the audience on this podcast will hear it. But I'm just saying, you know, we all have a little critic in our head, but within that gauntlet, you've walked of, you know, being in the trailer and being controlled like a puppet, there's really good work, you know, I mean, you were in the pocket in that moment with that character.

[C]

I will say feels good. Yes. And I will say that out of everything I've ever done, that was my first job. I think I was 27 or 8 when I got that. That was my first job ever. I did a wonder years, you know, a little guess, but that. That was it. Even to this day, that was the. And funny enough, after 30 years, they just started playing again on Amazon. They couldn't get the rights because all

[A]

the music, really cool.

[C]

It just started streaming, which is kind of cool. But that was it. That was the one. Because I was. I would. As you know, I would go to work on days off and watch him work. You remember when you would do that? Right now, it's like, I gotta work. That was. That was the one where we. We had amazing writers. And. And I. I don't think I could memorize that today at this age, I'd need Marlon Brando puke.

[A]

That's all I could think is, how do you memorize?

[C]

Oh, my God, I couldn't do that today. But, yeah, I. I know what you mean. And. And. And you gotta be for people who aren't in the business and they're going, fuck this guy. You got to be in this business to kind of get a hook into what I'm talking about. You guys have been just as long as I have, Dana. Even longer. I mean, you know, you've put up with all that shit before Saturday Night Live, you know, you were. You know, I'm curious to what. What. Where your life would have been if Saturday Night Live didn't come along, I think you would have stayed in acting and fucking good things would have happened there, but I think you would have found yourself. Unless you were writing stuff saying exactly. What I'm saying is like, Christ, man.

[B]

No, I did Blue Thunder. I did One of the Boys. I was completely controlled in these little things and doing stuff I hated to be doing. So, I mean, again, you're living this dream, which we acknowledge to everybody, but right now there's going to be some hammering at my.

[A]

That's right.

[B]

My crew was told from 11 to 12 to not hammer on top of my head. So we're at that time. But. Yeah, that's all very true, but just one word to describe Sarah Jessica Parker.

[A]

One word or three words, One paragraph, one page.

[C]

Fucking beautiful. Present team leader. If I could. If I could do something with just one person, if I had to act the rest of my life and had to pick one person, it would be her, man. I mean, there's something about this girl that's just, you know, there's. You're, you know, I can hit a tennis ball back and forth, you know, if you're not too good. And she'll just hit it back and forth with me all day and never try to fucking slam me one, you know, or anything like that. Like, some of these actors do that you do scenes with. She's the Best. And I get to do it again, apparently, because, you know, I did that reboot last year and then right before the actors strike and the writer strike, they said, hey, if we get picked up, would you do it again? And I said, sure, I'll come do some. But, you know, I really haven't heard anything since then. I'm hoping that we come back and do.

[A]

Let me see what's going on. All right.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

I'll get back to you.

[C]

Hey, Dana, would you. Would you tell me one of my favorite bits is to break this fucking guy complaining story up? Would you. Would you tell me the.

[B]

The Travolta Red Rednecky.

[C]

Oh, Red, Red neck. That's my favorite. You know, Red.

[B]

So for some reason, John is a fan of this character I do sometimes. Red Rednecky, the redneck comedian.

[C]

Now what if you. Now, I don't mean to put you on spot, but what if you didn't change a word and you did Red, Red, Red Necky as our buddy who introduced us, by the way, my favorite guy on the planet, Dennis Miller. What if you did Red as Dennis? What would that sound like?

[B]

Oh, all right, let's. Let's give It a shot before. That's more hammering. You ever fart so loud? A dog too. Stayed away going, what that coming against some.

[A]

I don't mind it. I don't mind it.

[C]

Give me one more.

[B]

Asked my mama to wash my tidy whitey. She said, sure thing. I asked her, how did it go? She goes, great. Haven't seen skid marks like that since the Daytona 500. Come and get some.

[A]

Come get some.

[B]

I asked my daddy, what's for dinner? He says, shit on a shingle. I said, this day just keeps getting better and better. Come and get some. He's so fucking funny, Dennis.

[C]

Oh, Dennis Miller is my favorite, favorite friend in the world.

[B]

He's great. Yeah. So. Well, we could go on for another hour and make a two parter.

[A]

No, come back because you have. You scratched the surface and.

[B]

Yeah, John, I mean, your stories are amazing. Really.

[A]

I have to say, you. You weren't complaining there. You were just giving a bleak reality that everyone kind of knows anyway, but they don't hear a lot. And, and, and everyone knows showbiz is tough. You were sort of saying parts that were tough. I mean, we all know the glitz and glamour and the money part when it works, but there's a grind there. It's always a grind. It's not. It doesn't totally just go away.

[B]

Okay, now I have to do one more thing. One more thing. You were here, you were in control. And then I'll do your request. This is 30 seconds. Greg, could you play the song in control? John Corbett original.

[A]

Bon Jovi feel at the beginning.

[C]

Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah.

[B]

I mean, look at this. Come on, Star.

[A]

Oh, it's a whole video. We're watching a video.

[C]

Stories about all the wild women we've known. When the conversation turns.

[B]

Come on, man.

[A]

Look at this.

[C]

So that's funny.

[B]

There you go. That's written. Written by you, I assume. Essentially co. Produced. Played the instruments. Look him up.

[C]

Yeah, look me up. That's a lot of fun. As you know, being a fellow musician, that's. That's a lot of fun. Hey, let me tell you, I can't

[B]

do what I just saw, though.

[C]

But go ahead, David, I got a catchphrase for you. You need a catchphrase.

[A]

Sure.

[C]

And you gave it to yourself. You gave it to yourself. One of my favorite things. And then we'll get off. One of my favorite things you did was. Was, you know, you did norm show. You know, before. Oh, yeah, yeah, before he passed. And I love. Do you remember your catchphrase for the angry guy? The angry guy. And he goes, yeah. How would the angry guys say it? When you were talking about getting catfished and you did the fucking funniest thing, you're like, show me that.

[A]

That's. That's horrible. But, yes, I do.

[C]

It's a great phrase.

[A]

That's the guy. That's the dirty pervert that DMS girls. And he's too rough right away.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Is that what it.

[C]

I got a line for you. Would you. Would you say this line and then give me the catchphrase?

[A]

Go ahead.

[C]

Okay. The line is, I'll put this order in and be right back with your drinks, girls. Catchphrase.

[A]

Okay, let me see if I remember the catchphrase. Okay, girls, I'm just gonna port your. Put your order in and I'll be right back with your drinks. Does that sound good? Now show me that pussy

[B]

turns into the Exorcist.

[C]

I don't know.

[A]

I. You know, John, I hear a lot about that dorm show. I never saw it, but it was his Netflix show, and I heard so much nice things about it. And it's hard to watch now because he passed away, but doing it was funny, and it was really. Because it was such a ragtag operation. And it made me think that's the way all these shows should be because it was so funny that it was such a fucking screw off. Yeah.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

We had a blast. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Thank you for bringing that up. And I don't remember that one, and I just did remember it. Great.

[C]

So.

[A]

And by the way, thanks for coming on also. Yeah, you kind of stole Dana as my friend. That's fine. We're going to skim over that. Dana's got a new friend. He's up there having dinners every night.

[B]

Place. I'll see you next week.

[A]

When he comes to. When he comes to see me, he struggles through a dinner, and it's fine, and that's great. But, John, you were hysterical. What a blast.

[B]

Yeah, thanks.

[A]

Thanks for talking to us.

[C]

I love it. I love it. I had fun. Thank you, guys.

[A]

All right, I'll talk to you soon, buddy.

[B]

Talk soon.

[C]

Bye.

[A]

All right, listen, if you're enjoying the fly on the wall, of course, hopefully you are. Click follow. We don't want to be desperate, but obviously smash that God dang button on your favorite podcast app. Leave a review a good one. Leave a five star rating, nothing else.

[B]

Whoops.

[A]

And maybe even share an episode with a friend. If you're watching this episode on YouTube, please subscribe. Dana, what do you think I'm gonna

[B]

tell you this right now. Hear me now, believe me later. Fly on the Wall. Believe it or not is presented by Odyssey and executive produced by. Hold For It. Dana Carvey and David Spade or David Spade and Dana Carvey? We don't write this stuff. Heather Santoro, Greg Holtzman and Leah Rhys Dennis. The show is edited by Evan Cox with production support from Phil Sweettech Talent Production and booking by Sophia Lepore.