Podcast
From my Counselling years to your listening ears. Hello and welcome.
Hosted by Heidi Lester · EN
WE ARE ALL FINE – Flawed. Insecure. Nervous. Emotional – and if you are looking to know how to accept yourself knowing you are actually normal in this uncertain world, and want validation for how difficult life can be, then join me - Heidi Lester a counsellor and psychotherapist specialising in working with young people and young adults. Together, with my experience and knowledge and with your potential and hope you will learn to accept yourself and manage your emotions more comfortably whilst being more in control of your mental wellbeing. My message to you is simple. You are important, and you matter. Let me show you how to feel that. From my counselling years to your listening ears, join me every Monday, for supportive suggestions on how to manage your world, your way. I believe in you – and I know with my professional help – we are going to make an amazing team.
10episodes
Episodes
Newest firstAll episodes
How to Detach from Overthinking (Anxiety, Hypervigilance & Childhood Roots Explained)
Mar 900:09:23Tap to summarizeWhy do we replay emails, dissect voice notes, and rehearse conversations that haven't even happened yet? In this episode, Heidi Lester explores overthinking—not as a personality flaw or "being too sensitive," but as a sophisticated safety strategy. Heidi explains the roots of hypervigilance and how our brains become "world-class detectives" when we grow up in unpredictable environments. This episode is an invitation to stop fighting your thoughts and start leading your nervous system back to the present moment. In This Episode, We Cover: The "Safety Strategy" of Spinning: Understanding why your brain scans for storms and how thinking became a shield in your childhood. The Roots of the Detective Brain: A reflection on how unpredictable moods or absence in early life teach us to read the "subtext" of silence to stay safe. Linear vs. Circular Thinking: How to identify when your mind is actually solving a problem versus when it’s just a car stuck in the mud. Cognitive Defusion: The simple, powerful shift from being the "actor" in your thoughts to being the "observer." Somatic Tools for Grounding: Why you can't talk a frightened nervous system out of fear, and how to "feel" your way out of a mental loop instead. Setting Cognitive Authority: Practical boundaries like the "Worry Window" to remind your anxiety that you are the CEO of your mind. Key Takeaway Quote "Thinking more doesn't make you safer; it just makes you tired. Resilience isn't about predicting every hard day perfectly—it’s about trusting that you can cope with whatever happens." Join the Conversation I would love to hear your reflections on this episode. What is the "puzzle" your brain usually tries to solve when you’re feeling unsafe? Email me: heidiweareallfine@gmail.com Follow & Connect: Find me on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok, and YouTube at @heidilestermentalhealththerapist for therapy skills you can use every day. Coming Up Next Week Join us as we talk to the "emotional sponges"—the ones who have been told they are "too sensitive." We’ll explore why sensitivity is actually a high-resolution lens on the world and how to stop "catching" everyone else's mood.
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Your Personality Might Be a Trauma Response (ACEs, Hyper-Independence & Healing)
Mar 200:09:23Tap to summarizeWhy do we over-perform, shut down, or struggle to trust even when we are safe? In this episode, Heidi Lester explores Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs)—not as a clinical checklist, but as the invisible blueprints that shape our adult lives. Heidi shares her own journey of growing up with an emotionally absent father and explains how "resilience" is often just a survival adaptation that we can finally choose to set down. This is an invitation to stop asking "What is wrong with me?" and start asking "What happened to me?" In This Episode, We Cover: • Defining ACEs in Human Terms: Moving beyond the acronym to understand how emotional neglect, instability, and conflict impact the developing brain. • The Survival Blueprint: How childhood adaptations (like being the "strong one" or the "invisible one") follow us into adulthood. • Heidi’s Personal Story: A reflection on abandonment, self-reliance, and the steady work of teaching a nervous system to trust again. • Recognising the Threads: How ACEs manifest in adulthood through overreacting, people-pleasing, or a relentless inner critic. • Practical Tools for Rewriting the Story: o Using body awareness to catch "activation" before it becomes an outburst. o The power of reflective journaling to create space between the trigger and the reaction. o Building "Internal Safety" through boundaries and self-compassion. Key Takeaway Quote "Adaptations that helped you survive at eight years old may not serve you at thirty-eight. Healing isn’t about rewriting history; it’s about gently teaching your nervous system that the present is not the past." Join the Conversation I would love to hear your reflections on this episode. What was the "role" you had to play as a child? • Email me: heidiweareallfine@gmail.com • Follow & Connect: Find me on Instagram/Facebook/TikTok and YouTube at @heidilestermentalhealththerpaist for therapy skills you can use every day Coming Up Next Week Join us as we dive into Overthinking—why your mind spirals and how to gently step out of the loop by understanding your nervous system's need for "certainty." Disclaimer: This podcast is for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional therapy or medical advice. If you are struggling, please reach out to a qualified mental health professional.
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Healing from Childhood ACEs — Rewriting Your Inner Story
Feb 2300:18:41Tap to summarizeChildhood experiences shape more than memories — they shape the way your nervous system responds to stress, relationships, and self-worth. In this episode of We Are All Fine, counsellor and psychotherapist Heidi Lester explores Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) and how they quietly influence adult emotional patterns, self-talk, and relational behaviours. This episode isn’t about blame or reliving the past. It’s about understanding — and gently learning how to rewrite the inner story your childhood shaped. You’ll learn how ACEs affect the brain and nervous system, how they show up in adulthood, and how counselling-informed tools can help you respond to yourself with compassion, clarity, and choice. If you’ve ever wondered “Why do I react like this?” or “Why does this feel so hard for me?” — this episode offers grounding insight and hope. Email Heidi - heidiweareallfine@gmail.com or connect with Heidi -@heidilestercounsellor on TikTok, Instagram, YouTube and Facebook
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Ghosting, Connection Anxiety, and Modern Relationship Pain
Feb 1600:16:07Tap to summarizeIn today’s world of texting, dating apps, and inconsistent communication, many people are experiencing a quiet but painful form of relational distress — ghosting, connection anxiety, and emotional uncertainty. In this episode of We Are All Fine, counsellor and psychotherapist Heidi Lester explores why modern relationship patterns can feel so destabilising, and why these experiences often hit deeper than we expect. You’ll learn how ghosting and inconsistent communication activate the nervous system, how attachment patterns influence anxiety and self-doubt, and why your reactions make sense — even when you feel like you’re “overreacting.” This episode is for anyone who has felt confused, anxious, or emotionally unsettled in modern relationships — and wants to understand themselves with more compassion, clarity, and emotional safety. You’re not too much. You’re responding to a system that learned to protect you. Email Heidi - heidiweareallfine@gmail.com or connect with Heidi -@heidilestercounsellor on TikTok, Instagram, YouTube and Facebook
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Inner Child Healing — What It Really Is (Not Cliché)
Feb 900:19:41Tap to summarizeDiscover the truth about inner child work. Heidi Lester, counsellor and psychotherapist, explores how early experiences shape your nervous system, influence your emotional patterns, and how you can respond with compassion, self-trust, and emotional integration. Move beyond clichés — and learn practical, therapeutic ways to reconnect with and support your inner self. Email Heidi - heidiweareallfine@gmail.com or connect with Heidi -@heidilestercounsellor on TikTok, Instagram, YouTube and Facebook
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Trauma Response vs. Overreaction — Understanding Your Alarm System
Feb 200:13:26Tap to summarizeIn this episode of We Are All Fine, Heidi explores one of the most misunderstood experiences in mental health: the difference between a trauma response and an overreaction. Many people judge themselves harshly for their emotional reactions — feeling “too much,” “too sensitive,” or “out of proportion.” But from a counselling and neuroscience perspective, these reactions often make complete sense. This episode gently unpacks how your nervous system works, why your body reacts before your mind can catch up, and how to respond to yourself with understanding instead of criticism. Email Heidi - heidiweareallfine@gmail.com or connect with Heidi -@heidilestercounsellor on TikTok, Instagram, YouTube and Facebook.
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Why Self-Care Isn’t Working — Using Counselling Skills to Support Yourself
Jan 2700:11:55Tap to summarizeAre you following self-care routines but still feeling drained, stressed, or emotionally off? In this episode, Heidi Lester, counsellor and psychotherapist, explores why traditional self-care often falls short — and how counselling skills can transform your daily practices into truly restorative experiences. This episode turns self-care from a checklist into a therapeutic conversation with yourself. Perfect for anyone looking to build self-trust, resilience, and genuine emotional nourishment. Email Heidi - heidiweareallfine@gmail.com or connect with Heidi -@heidilestercounsellor on TikTok, Instagram, YouTube and Facebook.
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Emotional Boundaries: How to protect yours without guilt
Jan 1300:13:05Tap to summarizeEmotional boundaries shape every relationship you have — yet many people struggle to set them without feeling guilty, selfish, or afraid of conflict. In this episode of We Are All Fine, counsellor and psychotherapist Heidi Lester explores what emotional boundaries really are, why they’re so difficult to maintain, and how they protect not just your wellbeing, but your relationships too. This is a gentle, therapeutic conversation about learning to honour your emotional limits, recognising when your boundaries are being crossed, and finding steadiness in saying no — without shutting others out. If you often feel emotionally drained, overwhelmed by others’ needs, or unsure where you end and someone else begins, this episode will help you reconnect with your own emotional space. Email Heidi - heidiweareallfine@gmail.com or connect with Heidi -@heidilestercounsellor on TikTok, Instagram, YouTube and Facebook.
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Emotional Boundaries — Understanding What Protects Your Peace, Energy & Wellbeing
Jan 500:12:55Tap to summarizeIn this therapeutic and reflective episode, Heidi explores the quiet power of emotional boundaries — the gentle limits that protect your energy, your emotional space, and your wellbeing. If you often feel drained, overwhelmed, guilty for saying no, or unsure how to express your needs without conflict… this episode will guide you back to clarity and self-respect. Learn how to recognise weak boundaries, why they’re so difficult to set, and the compassionate steps you can take to strengthen them. Email Heidi - heidiweareallfine@gmail.com or connect with Heidi -@heidilestercounsellor on TikTok, Instagram, YouTube and Facebook.
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Letting Go of Last Year: Closure, Compassion, and Moving Forward
Dec 2900:12:44Tap to summarizeThe new year often arrives with pressure — to be better, to start fresh, to reinvent yourself overnight. But emotional growth doesn’t happen through force. It happens through reflection, gentleness, and compassion. In this grounding New Year episode, Heidi guides you through a calming, therapeutic process for releasing what last year left behind — without shame, self-criticism, or forced positivity. This isn’t about resolutions. It’s about relief. It’s about understanding your experiences, honouring how far you’ve come, and moving forward in a way that feels supportive, not overwhelming. Perfect for anyone craving a softer, steadier start to the year. Email Heidi - heidiweareallfine@gmail.com or connect with Heidi -@heidilestercounsellor on TikTok, Instagram, YouTube and Facebook.
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