What Does Adam Pally Know About SNL & Grunge Music?

Summary

Podcast Summary: "What Does Adam Pally Know About SNL & Grunge Music?"

Funny You Ask with Ike Barinholtz
Release Date: May 6, 2026
Guest: Adam Pally
Main Topics: Saturday Night Live (SNL), Grunge Music, New York Knicks

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Episode Overview

This riotously funny episode of Funny You Ask features actor, comedian, and grunge aficionado Adam Pally as he takes on Ike Barinholtz's trivia gauntlet. The duo dives deep into their shared love of random facts, swapping personal stories about SNL, musical obsessions, and New York Knicks fandom. Part rapid-fire trivia, part inside-Hollywood hang-out, the episode is packed with nostalgia, self-deprecation, and genuinely fascinating detours—plus more laughs per minute than most sketch shows.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

Childhood Obsessions & Bar Mitzvah Themes

• Adam reveals his three childhood obsessions: SNL, grunge music, and the Knicks—so much so that those were his (jokingly) bar mitzvah themes.
• Anecdotes about themed birthday parties and the joy (and perils) of crafting cassette mixtapes for party favors.
• Notable: Adam recalls getting in trouble after gifting guests Rage Against the Machine's "Killing In the Name" as part of his bar mitzvah mixtape.

  "I wanted to give, like, a mix out as the giveaway... The last song... was the Rage Against the Machine 'Fuck you, I won't do what you tell me.'... A lot of phone call." – Adam Pally (47:22)

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SNL: Fanboy Deep Dive & Audition Disasters

• The conversation shifts to SNL, with both sharing early memories (Eddie Murphy skits taped on cassettes by parents, influence of '80s and '90s casts).
• Nostalgic admiration for SNL legends: Farley, Hartman, Tina & Amy, Eddie Murphy, Dana Carvey, Leslie Jones, and more.
• Adam details his (infamous) disastrous SNL audition tape experience:
  • He stood out by performing original bits on a Staten Island public access show, complete with rimshots and bombed jokes, then eagerly handed the tape to Seth Meyers, only to be told:

    “What the fuck am I supposed to do with this?” – Seth Meyers (20:25)

• On meeting Lorne Michaels later as a fully formed comedian:

  "By the time I met Lorne… I was a fully formed comedian... I'm so happy with when I met him and how I met him." – Ike Barinholtz (25:12)

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Building A Dream SNL Cast

Prompt: Build your SNL cast of 7—no constraints of era or life/death status.

Adam Pally's SNL Dream Team (28:00–30:23)

• Phil Hartman (the everyman)
• Tina Fey
• Amy Poehler
• Eddie Murphy
• Dana Carvey ("you need that guy")
• Leslie Jones ("you need a chaos angel" – or sub in Farley for more chaos)
• Controversial picks: Ryan Gosling, Emma Stone ("because you need young, hot people")

Ike Barinholtz's Cast (32:11+)

• Amy Poehler, Tina Fey, Will Ferrell, Chris Farley, Eddie Murphy, Tim Meadows, Kristen Wiig, Fred Armisen

Memorable Exchange (on the small size of seven):

"Seven is also too little." – Adam Pally (33:37)

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Grunge Music & 1990s Nostalgia

• Adam recounts his grunge bar mitzvah, reading his haftorah in an Eddie Vedder voice.
• Both discuss the seismic cultural impact of Nirvana's "Nevermind" (1991), with Adam nailing the trivia, albeit after accidentally naming "In Utero" first (43:44).
• A funny detour on band names—what they’d name their 1991 Olympia, WA grunge band:

  “Olympia, Washington" as the band name, first single: "Same As It Ever Wasn't", single: “Jeb” – Adam Pally (58:38)

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The Knicks: Lifelong Fandom, Family Ties & Hypotheticals

• Adam describes his first Knicks game (Larry Johnson’s four-point play), early days watching in Chicago, and the special nature of Knicks fandom.
• Father-son sports loyalty: Adam shares about his father-in-law's team flexibility, leading to:

  "I love my children more than I love my basketball team." – Adam Pally (67:51)

• Hilarious “Would you rather?” sacrifices for a Knicks championship, with line-in-the-sand moments:

  "The only thing I wouldn't do is stop eating chicken parm." – Adam Pally (75:53)

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Lightning Trivia, Rapid-Fire Riffs & MVP Moments

Sample Questions/Answers (Speed Round, 79:33–84:38)

• "Best grunge guitarist, founder of Alice in Chains?"
  Jerry Cantrell – Adam (79:40)
• "This Knicks '90s legend is their all-time leader in three pointers?"
  John Starks (81:22)
• "Who hosted Weekend Update for majority of the ‘80s?"
  Dennis Miller – Adam (79:53)
• "Which SNL hosting legend played the Continental?"
  Christopher Walken (81:23)
• "Pearl Jam’s debut album?"
  Ten (81:24)

Notable Achievement:

• Ike proclaims Adam “definitely one of our celeb MVPs” for trivia performance (82:05).

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Bob Odenkirk’s influence:

  "He’s like what Rodney was for standups in the ‘80s. But he kept his balls in and does a lot less coke..." – Ike Barinholtz (11:03)

• On Billy Crystal’s SNL era and blackface:

  "The Paley Center is gonna do a look back at all of Billy Crystal’s best blackface." – Adam Pally (13:38)

• Adam’s SNL Tape, Redux:

  "It’s like me doing, like, Matthew McConaughey asking for directions—‘Yeah man, take a left and a right…’ and then nothing. And you hear like, ba dum." (20:38)

• Ike’s advice to his daughter on sports allegiances:

  "...you can marry anyone as long as they’re not a Republican." (69:04)

• On party stamina in middle age:

  "If I’m in a non-work situation where it is 1am and I’m still awake—call 911." – Ike Barinholtz (42:50)

• On SNL audition failure and persevering:

  "It’s losses like that that make you wonder how delusional I am, that I’m still like, I’m an actor." – Adam Pally (21:20)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• [02:13] Adam Pally intro and background
• [06:17] Ike introduces the trivia format
• [07:12] Chris Farley’s Matt Foley SNL trivia
• [08:41] Bob Odenkirk’s SNL legacy
• [15:19] SNL, SCTV, comedy family influences
• [16:42] Adam’s SNL audition story
• [21:20] The infamous audition tape, legacy, and being roasted on Access Hollywood
• [28:00] Dream SNL cast draft
• [43:39] Grunge/crossover Nirvana trivia
• [65:14] Adam’s first Knicks game
• [67:51] Sports loyalty vs. family, intergenerational fandom
• [75:53] What Adam would (and wouldn’t) do for a Knicks title
• [79:33] Speed round trivia (grunge, SNL, Knicks)
• [82:05] Adam crowned trivia “MVP”
• [85:41] The (fake-signed) Brunson Knicks jersey gift

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Tone & Atmosphere

The episode is fast-paced, freewheeling, and brimming with the unfiltered chemistry of two comedians who are also lifelong friends. Adam and Ike keep the energy high with zingers, deep-cut pop-culture pulls, and self-deprecating asides. Even as they land earnest insights about comedy, family, and growing up, the mood is irreverent and full of playful trash talk.

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For Listeners

If you love SNL lore, ‘90s alt rock deep-dives, Jewish cultural touchstones, or just want to hear what actual comedians remember (and misremember) when the trivia hits, this episode is unmissable. And if you’ve ever wondered what anyone would give up for a Knicks championship—well, apparently, anything except chicken parm.

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Listen to full episodes of Funny You Ask with Ike Barinholtz wherever you get your podcasts or subscribe on YouTube.

Transcript

[A]

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[B]

Where is Daredelpha a miner?

[C]

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[A]

So what's next?

[C]

I feel liberated. We're gonna take this city back over

[B]

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They're hunting us. It's time we started hunting them.

[C]

I can work with them.

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This should be tons of fun.

[C]

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[B]

Are you on a grande mama? Come here and get some of these dogs.

[C]

Your mother said you've been rolling up Rola doobies. Well, you can't be rolling up doobies.

[B]

Would you never eat chicken parm ever again for the Knicks to win a championship?

[C]

The only thing I wouldn't do is stop eating chicken parm.

[B]

Sitting across from me is a man who is an actor, a writer, possibly a director, maybe a musician, a father, a husband, a frigging poet. Thank you, Adam Pally. Welcome to Funny youy Ask.

[C]

I'm very, I'm very happy to be here.

[B]

You are the second person from the Mindy Project to be on this.

[C]

Behind Mind. Mindy.

[B]

Behind Mindy.

[C]

That is the biggest honor.

[B]

That is pretty crazy.

[C]

That is an amazing honor. Cause there's a lot of really big people on that show.

[B]

She came on here and did not pretended like she didn't know it was a trivia podcast. And she got really mad and was like ripping on me the entire time.

[C]

I will not do that. I will not do that. I promise. I am already feeling bad when you texted me telling me where to go and everything. And then you were like, also, what are some things that you know about? And I genuinely felt a real question from you, like, does Adam know about anything? Like, we've been friends for over 10 years. And I genuinely felt you for the first time being like, Adam, have you ever known anything?

[B]

It's like, I get your topics and I'm like, actually, we're not doing the podcast anymore.

[C]

He should really be more on a casual conversation podcast.

[B]

It's like when they had that email from Elon to Epstein who was like, I would love to come to some of your epic toddies. And they're like, yeah, we're not doing that anymore.

[C]

That's truly how I feel.

[B]

I'm like you.

[C]

I would love to answer trivia on one of your trivia shows.

[B]

I would love to come and answer some questions about trivia and maybe have some sex.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

How is the shut down, the power, the talent?

[B]

At what point isn't he like, maybe I can meet some girls? Fml I was like, oh, my God.

[C]

Fml oh my God. Like, you're a fucking Billionaire.

[B]

Like a 60 year old billionaire. FML FML OMFG R A F O

[C]

L. Maybe I could come. I'll bring the suntan lotion. Lmao.

[B]

Lmao. Lmfao. And listen to lmfao. My favorite. On top of all your accomplishments, you also know a little bit about grunge music.

[C]

A little bit. Yeah, yeah.

[B]

Snl.

[C]

Yep.

[B]

New York Knicks, baby. Yes.

[C]

Those are like the three that was like, those are the bar mitzvah themes I had.

[B]

You famously had three bar mitzvahs. The first two didn't take. The rabbi's like, okay, let's try it again.

[C]

How is Pinocchio? They're like, is this boy ever gonna become a man?

[B]

Was there ever a kid that had a Pinocchio themed bar mitzvah?

[C]

I mean, we were all growing.

[B]

I think he, like. There was a kid who was like, I wanna have a Pinocchio themed bar mitzvah. And then he got bullied so hard, he's like, we'll just do sports. His dad has to dress up as Geppetto.

[C]

I don't know. But the name that comes to mind is Schwartz. I can just imagine Ben being like,

[B]

I was in a bit of a Pinocchio fan.

[C]

I was in a pin. I liked all the characters.

[B]

Ben, we're waiting for you to be a guest on this show. He's the greatest. By the way, my little one is. She's a real sonic head and she has a sonic themed birthday. She's the greatest to give like your kid be like, hey, I have a message for you.

[C]

Oh, I know.

[B]

And he does it on it being like, hey, Eleanor, I'm just trying to.

[C]

Drake. Drake does the cutest thing. He got his number and will text Ben from his iPad. Theories.

[B]

Yes.

[C]

That he has about what's going to happen. And Ben is just such a bleeding heart, sweetie, that he'll write back some theory.

[B]

That's a really cool showbiz thing that we were not afforded. I was never able to say to my dad, oh, man, I would love to talk to Fletch, you know? And he's like, oh, let me see if he's around. That's cool. We're cool. All right, so here's how this is gonna work. I'm gonna ask you a question about your topics. We're gonna. We're gonna talk.

[C]

And then I'm slightly nervous about. About the. Don't be. Are people. Are people nervous about the. About that part of it?

[B]

People get nervous about it, and then when they leave, they're like, I shouldn't have been.

[C]

Okay, great. Then I feel.

[B]

And then you'll ask me one. We'll do that a couple times, and then we'll do the sp. Speed round.

[C]

Great.

[B]

All right, we're gonna get into this right away. We're gonna talk about a little show called Saturday Night Live.

[C]

Okay?

[B]

Okay. You ready for this?

[C]

Yes. I hope it's my. Like, our. I hope it's our. Cause we've had so many conversations about it. I hope it's our age.

[B]

Well, we'll. We'll see.

[C]

Okay, we'll see.

[B]

What if it's only about last week's episode?

[C]

That would be really good. I haven't seen it. That would be challenging.

[B]

Here we go. Question number one. The absolute goat. Chris Farley played a sweaty, panicked motivational speaker. What was his character's name and where did he live?

[C]

Oh, well, first of all, I'm realizing now that trivia is about memory.

[B]

What do you think it was about, like, leg strength?

[C]

I thought there would be a physical component.

[B]

Well, maybe there was.

[C]

I wore flowy pants. Well, it's. I mean, I know the most is. My name is Matthew. I live in a van down by the river.

[B]

You're so close.

[C]

I know.

[B]

I'll give you a hint. You want one?

[C]

No, no, no.

[B]

Don't give me the last name.

[C]

No, don't give me a hint.

[B]

I'm not gonna give you a hint.

[C]

I'm gonna go through the.

[B]

You're.

[C]

I'm, like, literally playing this sketch in my head. Spade.

[B]

There you've been rolling up Christina Aguilera or Christina Applegate.

[C]

Your mother said you've Been rolling up rola doo doobies.

[B]

God damn it.

[C]

Well, you can't be rolling up goobies. My name is Matthew.

[B]

Lose the thew. Just say Matt.

[C]

Matt Foley.

[B]

Yes.

[C]

And I live in a van down by the river.

[B]

That is correct. Adam Pally is on the board.

[C]

Wow.

[B]

Right there.

[C]

That was nerve wracking.

[B]

Bonus question.

[C]

Shit.

[B]

Bonus question. Right.

[C]

Who wrote Bob Odenkirk?

[B]

Oh, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. Whoa. That flew. You are two points on the board. Bob Odenkirk wrote the original Matt Foley sketch when they were at second school.

[C]

Can I amend that too though, a little?

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

He did it in Wisconsin with Stack.

[B]

Really? Brian Stack co wrote it?

[C]

Didn't write it. Just saw him do it and was.

[B]

Wow.

[C]

Wait, so Stack and Farley in Wisconsin.

[B]

In Wisconsin. And then Odenkirk.

[C]

Odenkirk. When he got the second scene.

[B]

Oh my go. Wow, wow, wow, wow.

[C]

Yeah, that's a good piece of trivial.

[B]

Can we take a second and just talk about Bob Odenkirk?

[C]

Sure, Bobby boy.

[B]

I think he's like my idol. Yeah, he's like, definitely.

[C]

He would be in the Mount Rushy of like, could do, like the way his life has, the way his career in life has panned. It's like he could do everything.

[B]

Yeah, he's done it all except direct

[C]

studio comedies written on snl. But I mean, he did it twice.

[B]

He's done it. I think he probably didn't like love it. It's just the fact that it's been

[C]

awful directing a studio comedy with like

[B]

your vision in the 2000s.

[C]

Yeah, it must have been terrible.

[B]

He was a writer on snl. So cool.

[C]

Cast member Ben Stiller.

[B]

Cast member, the Ben Stiller show, one of the best sketch shows. Creates arguably the best schedule of all time. Mr. Show, right?

[C]

Yes. Certainly the most influence, like besides Saturday Night Live, like the most. 100%, like touched the most.

[B]

Yes, yes.

[C]

Quality.

[B]

And then has like a weird couple years where he's directing and not probably hitting like he wants then and then

[C]

also at the same time guest starring. Having a guest star run.

[B]

Yes.

[C]

Comedically, like when I like, Shoot me.

[B]

I remember him on Just Shoot Me.

[C]

I mean, amazing. Just Shoot Me. Arrest development.

[B]

Larry Sanders, like his Stevie Grant on the Larry Sanders shows.

[C]

Amazing.

[B]

In the last episode after Larry fires him and he's in like one of the writers rooms doing coke and another agent comes in and he's like, I fucking hate these little fucking actor babies. And the guy is like, where'd you get this coke? It's good he goes, I got it from someone at the Simon Weasant. All centers.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

But then he goes and creates one of the best TV characters of all time over two series, right? Then action star becomes like an action star. I love those.

[C]

Survives a heart attack and holds onto his hair. He's a hero.

[B]

He's goaded. And also, like, the nicest guy. An incredibly kind person. Incredibly, like, helpful, I was gonna say.

[C]

And then think about how many of us he put on. You know what I mean?

[B]

Like a brother at him.

[C]

He directed. He directed the first Montreal Sketch Showcase. That was me, Ben, Gil, Bobby, Eugene. Like that.

[B]

He.

[C]

He's like. He's so. He's touched so many people and been like, no, you're good. You go there.

[B]

He's kind of like what Rodney was for standups in, like, the 80s.

[C]

But he kept his balls in his.

[B]

But he kept his balls in and does a lot less coke and frequents a lot less whorehouses.

[C]

When he keeps his balls, he doesn't invite you up to the suite and

[B]

have his balls flop out.

[C]

Flop out of a bathrobe.

[B]

We love you, Bob. Who was the first SNL cast member? You, like, were like, whoa. You were like, oh, man, that's funny. That guy.

[C]

You know, like, part of me wants to say the Sandman, but I think. I think that that's actually not true. I think that that's just, like, my teenage mind. Right, right, right. Like, because the Sandman was on when I was like, 12. Yep, 11. 12. So it's like. I think I clicked into the Sandman, but I think probably because my par. On the periphery of the industry and it was like such a. SNL was such a big deal in my house. I want to say, like, Eddie Murphy or even being played all the old tapes of Belushi and Gilda and stuff like that.

[B]

For me, it was definitely Eddie Murphy, because I was like, five when I saw him live on snl. I had seen a couple tapes of Belushi and loved that, but Eddie Murphy was. I just couldn't believe what I was watching.

[C]

Yeah, I remember Hot Tub.

[B]

James Brown.

[C]

James Brown. James Brown's Hot Tub being like where my dad, like, taped it on a cassette.

[B]

Yes, yes.

[C]

You know, and, like, I remember him watching it, like, when. When people came over. You know what I mean?

[B]

Probably take a little bit of Goofballs or something.

[C]

I'm sure they were. God knows what. They. Swingers Party at Stuyvesant Town with the other artists, you know, and my bedroom's a closet, and I'm like listening to Eddie Murphy be like, ow. And like, get a hot, hot. And I'm like, I'm gonna get in the water. And I was, can I, can I come out?

[B]

They were like, no, no, we're doing cocaine.

[C]

My mom like, no, we're doing coke.

[B]

We're doing coke. We're all, someone's in here. Yeah, I remember, like, that was really when I formed. Kind of like my early comedic Persona was around him. And then like, I really remember that, like, 80 forecast with like Billy Crystal and Chris Guest.

[C]

You know what? That's true. I forgot. You know, like, you look marvelous. And the. Oh, my God, you look marvelous was like huge. Billy Crystal was enormous.

[B]

Billy Crystal was, besides Eddie Murphy, my favorite stand up. And Richard Pryor, like, my dad would listen to Richard Pryor albums, but Billy Crystal was so goddamn funny. Like, you could walk up to someone and go, you look marvelous. And they would fall on the ground laughing.

[C]

I heard they're gonna do. And I can't believe they're gonna do it, but I heard the Paley center is gonna do a look back at all of Billy Crystal's best blackface.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. He's got some winners.

[C]

The wealth of it. The wealth of it.

[B]

So much of it. I like the jazz, man. Can you dig that? I knew the jazz.

[C]

I feel a kid when, when, when he would come out in was like Muhammad Ali or something. Everyone Weird. Yeah, I know.

[B]

It was just past where it was like, normal.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

It wasn't.

[C]

You could do cosel.

[B]

Sure, sure. Yeah.

[C]

Maybe not lean into the yellow.

[B]

Even Fernando is.

[C]

Fernando is not great.

[B]

Portugal or something. But, like, you're just, you're playing Sammy Davis Jr. And you just have like shoe polish on your face. It's crazy. It's crazy. But we love you. We'd love to get you on the show.

[C]

We love you. I'm gonna ask you to play my dad one of these days.

[B]

He would be a good.

[C]

He'd be a good pally dad. He'd be a good pal.

[B]

He. I. I love him so much. He is, like, really one of the funniest guys ever, man. I love him. But I remember that cast.

[C]

Like, that cast was good. And then, you know, like, I also was such a. Because my parents and I was such a dweeb and dork.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

That, like, even SCTV was so big for me, you know, like, Martin Short on SCTV is like, like, you know the Edgar Winter character, Jackie Rogers Jr. Yes.

[B]

Oh, my God, it was amazing. So fun. We were, My parents were Big comedy people. We were steeped in comedy. So SCTV and snl.

[C]

Yeah. And then when I got to Chicago, like, I moved to Chicago as a kid in, like, 86. 86. Yeah. So, like, that comedy was, like, enormous.

[B]

Yeah, that's when Stand up was, like, tearing through Chicago. Right before, like, the improvisance.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

Of like, 1990.

[C]

Before that.

[B]

Yeah, but that's. Yeah, that's. That is okay. We both were. An improv comedy.

[C]

We both.

[B]

You did UCB, I did I.O. and all that. Did you ever audition for SNL?

[C]

Did Seth ever tell you this story? Oh, my God, I did.

[B]

Oh, no, I know it's bad. Cause you've never told me that you did.

[C]

It's really bad. I. I didn't read the Room. I. I was like. I was young. I was really young. I was younger than. You know, everyone, like, gets their shot kind of if you play it, like, at the time when we were coming up. It's like, if you could. You're consistent and you. You developed and you could. You could put material together and. And you got it in front of someone, like a Seth or a Tina or. You know what I mean?

[B]

Just one of them came to the right ass. Cat.

[C]

Yeah. Or even, like, a friend of theirs saw you.

[B]

Yes.

[C]

You could get. You. You could get your shot if you kept it going. So I didn't ask Cat. When I was really young, I was like, 24.

[B]

Ascat, by the way, is the Upright Citizens Brigade Sunday night show that I've done a lot.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

One of the most fun things.

[C]

So fun. So fun. Yes. And I was. I. You know, I'd been at the theater since I was really young, so I was thought of as older, but I was young still. I was, like, probably 24, 25. And Seth. I did a show with Seth, and he was like, you should audition, make a tape for me and give it to me, you know, like, don't submit it.

[B]

I'll take you.

[C]

Give it to me. So I was like, you're my man, dude. Yes. Yes. I'm gonna blow your way. But I still was not, like, I don't think I was, like, as refined. I didn't know what I was doing really, but I was still chaotic.

[B]

Right. You had the. Some things. Je ne sais quoi. And it was fun chaos. But your comedic Persona was not solidified.

[C]

No. So I went. I found a public access comedy show called the Staten Island Comedy show that

[B]

was definitely the funniest burrow by far.

[C]

I mean, no, not even close, if you count it's like, yeah. So I went there, and it's hosted by, like, legit people who had been in car accidents, you know, who. Like, it was, like, on a blue screen, and there was a drummer with, like, one tom in the corner that would do rim shots after the. The guy would do, like, Confucius say jokes, you know, like a guy with

[B]

a traumatic brain injury, 100%, with, like,

[C]

a racist guy with, like, a tie that was, like, off and, like, coffee stains. And, like, the blue screen would sometimes change to, like, Robin Bird, though, like, like, by accident, you know, it was, like, really janky.

[B]

Robin Bird was a public access porn star who. She was just naked.

[C]

Naked. Yeah.

[B]

I remember she would, like. I remember one time, my first time I saw her, she was doing a cooking demo topless, and she burned her tits.

[C]

Yes. She probably didn't feel it that bad, but I. And so I did five minutes.

[B]

I, like, you booked yourself on the public access show.

[C]

Oh, my God. And did five minutes and ran through impressions and characters. And every time I did it, it was like a bomb. And then a rim shot. And I thought it was the funniest thing. I was like, that feels like something

[B]

people would do now.

[C]

You were ahead of the curve. Yeah. I was like, but this is the funniest thing ever.

[B]

Yeah. Ye.

[C]

I ran to ascat, gave it to Seth, had another killer ascat.

[B]

And you're already thinking, like, how is Don Pardo gonna say my name?

[C]

Oh, I'm already like, well, they have Andy, but I guess Two juice. All right, let's go. You know, like. And Seth comes back the next week and goes, what the fuck am I supposed to do with this?

[B]

Oh, no, no. Not even the buddy. It's just not a good.

[C]

Just like, what am I supposed to do with this? And I was like. He's like. He's like. I'd say try again maybe, but go the. You know. And I was like, okay. And I was just so, like, I fucked up so bad. So then cut to, like, 20 years later. It must have been, like, four or five years ago. I was doing a movie with Yorma and Jorma. We're like, it was raining, and we're waiting around, and he's like, let's FaceTime Seth. And it was right before the writers strike. So we FaceTimed Seth and we're talking, and Jorma goes, hey, can I see Adam's SNL video? And I go, no, Seth, you can't. Cause it's the writers strike. And Seth goes, no, it's fine. That wasn't writing. Then he showed it to him.

[B]

He still had it.

[C]

He has it. He has it now. He has it now.

[B]

He's waiting till you, like, run for office or something.

[C]

Oh, he's already given it to Access Hollywood twice.

[B]

Mario Lopez is like, this shit sucks.

[C]

They played a clip on it on Access Hollywood. Cause of Seth. Yeah. It's like me. It's like me doing, like, Matthew McConaughey asking for directions. And I'm like, yeah, man. So what? Take a left and a right and then nothing. And you hear like, ba dum. And I was like, how did you get that? I was like, and I didn't know that. I was like, how did you get that? And they're like, our good friend at NBC set Meyers.

[B]

Oh, no. Oh, no.

[C]

I know. It's losses like that that make you wonder how delusional I am, that I'm still like, I'm an actor.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[C]

Normal people would go through that and then be like, I'm probably. Maybe I'm not cut out for this.

[B]

Because the SNL audition, which is very similar to what I did when I auditioned for MADtv. I wanted to be on SNL. That was my dream, of course. And I never even, like, auditioned, really, because I went to shocking. I just never.

[C]

But you must have gotten swept up so quick. Like, you. You go to. To Boom Chicago, which is like, when we were kids, if you were in Boom Chicago, like, that was it.

[B]

That was so fun. That was like, yeah, that was the. My improv theater I worked at in Amsterdam. It's still there. Check it out. It's amazing. But then I came to LA with Seth, and he got hired by snl. Like, I feel like three or four months into living here, like, right away.

[C]

Barely.

[B]

Barely. Like, he worked, like, three shifts at Miyagi's, and then they were like, no, no, no. And I had, like, a year or so of, like, waiting or busing tables and stuff. But then I got mad tv and. But it's a similar audition where you do, like, three impressions and then three original characters. The impressions. I could stumble through a few different impressions. I was never, like, a character guy.

[C]

Me either.

[B]

I'm not built like that. Like, I'm not like a. Like, I'm just more of a straight man, you know?

[C]

I found that I can do it more now. Like, I can do it more as I'm older, because everything is such, like, a thin veil, you know? It's like, where am I gonna really push? Like, I won't have a Chicago Accent, like, right, right. You know what I mean? Like, I can do it in certain aspects.

[B]

Maybe it's because when we were younger, we're, like, a little more self conscious or in our head than, like, your wig. You know what I mean? Or someone disappears into a character.

[C]

Like, I. I could never do that. You want. You want to know what else? I did my material. Seth said it was so thin. I did. I did Adam Duritz, the lead singer.

[B]

The lead singer of Counting Crows, County

[C]

Crows, doing a political talk show.

[B]

Like Politically Incorrect.

[C]

Yeah. So it's like this. So it was like, like. All right, welcome back. Today we have with us Ike Barinholtz. Now, Ike, you were going to start off talking about the economy.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, I was. You know, looking at the GDP this

[C]

quarter,

[B]

I think that maybe, you know, expenditures are going up and we're. It's very good, but it is paper thin.

[C]

I was like, I thought that was going to get me on update. Like, there's nothing there. It's like. It's like my whole career is like, just smoke and mirror.

[B]

Mine is pretty. I'm pretty similar. Like, I can do. Like. I remember I dig Nick Nolte ordering at a Thai restaurant, but it was just like, I'm gonna get a little pad Thai and what the hell is larb? God damn it. But it was like, I couldn't do more.

[C]

Like, great. So we're gonna have him order every week.

[B]

Like, this week, Nick Nolte has Mexican food. But in your head, you're like, I mean, did you ever. You never actually went and watched.

[C]

I never made it to stage, which I think actually was better because by the time I met Lorne and was, like, working and brought.

[B]

Right.

[C]

Like, by the time I was, like, a person as an actor to that. To that crew, I think I was, like, a fully formed comedian and, like, had, like, a Persona.

[B]

And he wanted to talk to you then.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

He wouldn't want to talk to you back. Exact same with me. I feel like if I would have met Lorne Michaels when I was 25, he would have been like, ugh, yeah.

[C]

He would've been like, there's nothing here.

[B]

I met him for the first time, like, six months ago, and I sat and talked to him for, like, 20 minutes. I was taken aback by how sweet he was and nice and funny. Like, I'm so. As much as I would be curious to see what would happen if I could transport myself and audition and what Sliding doors thing would have been, but I'm so happy with when I Met him and how I met him and how we interacted.

[C]

Yeah. And completely. And, like, I just love the institution so much. And, like, I'm so glad to, like, be, like, on the peripheral of the peripheral.

[B]

Yeah, me too.

[C]

You know that I can, like, go see friends when they do it. And, like, you know, it's like, that's the biggest privilege.

[B]

My first date with my wife, I took her to SNL to see Pearl Jam.

[C]

Oh.

[B]

You know what I mean? I've taken Mike Shoemaker. Put my parents in the front row for U2.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Like, oh, God. I remember one night I was going. My brother was in college and we were in New York, and we were. The four of us were gonna go to snl. Seth and Shoemaker got us tickets, and we went to dinner beforehand at Route 57.

[C]

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

[B]

Yeah. And I was wearing, like, a white sweater and my brother was, like, a sophomore in college. He ordered a cranberry vodka.

[C]

Oh, no.

[B]

He spilled the entire thing on my sweater.

[C]

And it's freezing cold.

[B]

Freezing cold. And, like, he wanted to die when it happened, but it was fine. We just, we started talking a few months ago.

[C]

Yeah. It seems like you haven't thought about it.

[B]

Yeah, no, no, no, it's good.

[C]

We just got water down the back, man.

[B]

A lot of intensive catching therapy has gotten us both to a point where we can comfortably sit at a holiday together. And even though we don't talk, no one's uncomfortable.

[C]

I just, I, I, I know, I know the players involved. And I can say your brother, John

[B]

Barinholtz, if you're around, return a phone call. He'll be on the show very soon. We have a whole thing.

[C]

Former love interest of mine on Happy Endings.

[B]

That is very true. Oh, my God. What if I just blasted you now for playing a gay man on Happy Endings?

[C]

Too late, pal.

[B]

Like, I just took the ZW Ay bit. I just take Zweigh's entire bit.

[C]

I've been blasted.

[B]

You know, I will say this. You the best guest on Z Way. You and George Santos. And you guys are very similar to me.

[C]

You know, that's what Reyo's. They're their two best reservations. Me and George Santos.

[B]

Okay? You're Lorne Michaels, and you are able to manipulate space and time and build your dream. SNL cast. Seven cast members. You can or don't have to include Update as part of it, but your top seven cast members go, Okay,

[C]

I think you need Phil Hartman because you need a dad, a judge, a lawyer, a cop, fireman, an everyman an everyman who with authority.

[B]

I really appreciate you doing the Lorne impression.

[C]

I think. Could I have some popcorn?

[B]

You don't have to.

[C]

Where is my popcorn? No, I think I go Phil. I think Phil Hartman.

[B]

Yes.

[C]

Then I would go Tina and Amy.

[B]

Yeah. Okay. Yep, yep, yep.

[C]

Eddie Murphy.

[B]

We have a. Our Venn diagram is starting to look like a real circle.

[C]

It's a seven. So how am I four? Tina, Amy, Phil Hartman, Eddie Murphy, Dana Carvey. Yeah.

[B]

How do you not put.

[C]

Because you just need the.

[B]

You need that guy.

[C]

You need that guy. Like, to me, James Austin Johnson reminds me a lot.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. Yes, yes, yes.

[C]

You know what I mean? Where it's like, you need just who's, like, kind of unaffiliated with an improv scene.

[B]

Right. Can come in and lead a sketch, support a sketch, can do the impression. Yeah, yeah.

[C]

H. How many, Matt? Five.

[B]

Five. You got two more.

[C]

Two, two, two more. Leslie Jones.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And I'll. I, I, I think you need something that is like chaos. You need a chaos.

[B]

You need a chaos angel.

[C]

You need a chaos angel.

[B]

Whether her or Tracy.

[C]

Tracy would be good, but I feel like we're over male. I feel I want to make it Seven is hard. Cause it's like four to three, but I want to make it as, like, down the middle. So I have versatility.

[B]

It's very woke.

[C]

I appreciate it, man. I'mma say something controversial.

[B]

Ooh, ooh, ooh. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Say Ryan Gosling as, like, a permanent host.

[C]

No, as a cast member.

[B]

As a cast member.

[C]

And then I'm gonna say something more controversial. Emma Stone is the last one. Because you need young, hot people on snl.

[B]

You need young, hot people.

[C]

And you said I could do whatever I wanted, and I did.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

They're young and hot. Well, not anymore, but they were. Yeah, they're young and hot.

[B]

They're hot.

[C]

They're hot and young and can do anything and everything.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

They could host Update.

[B]

Yeah. You know, whenever you get those actors that host, where you're like, oh, you could be a cast member. I gotta get. I gotta shout out Sabrina Carpenter. Sure.

[C]

She put her on. She was amazing.

[B]

Like, were you in the 50th with me?

[C]

Did you see her do that song?

[B]

No. Oh, my God.

[C]

Yeah. I was, like, crying.

[B]

I saw her in concert, though, and she's pretty amazing. I took her, my daughters to see it. Even though every song was about, like, I don't know, shaving your pussy or whatever. It was like, a wonderful concert, and she was really great. My kids Are obsessed with her, and she's a great actor.

[C]

I got to go to the 50th. The whole weekend. Cause.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[C]

Yeah. Cause Jorma's wife Miriel, had. What's that disease where you can't stop shitting? It's like your kids get it all the time. It was, like, running rampant.

[B]

Oh, oh, oh. The virus.

[C]

Noro. She had neurovirus. It was awesome. We'd love to have you shitty, you know? I love you. It was awesome.

[B]

She is amazing, by the way.

[C]

She's, like, the most talented director.

[B]

And when she was on the Queen's Gambit.

[C]

Oh, my God.

[B]

Oh, my God. You're like, why is she in every movie anyway? So you were.

[C]

She got one. She got neurovirus. And Jorm was like, hey, you want to go to the weekend? I know you'll like it. And I was like, oh, my God. So I went. When she started singing, I was like. I was bawling. I mean, it was just like, I love her. She's really. And she's. She's like a sitcom actress in a lot of ways.

[B]

She's a snake. Yeah, man.

[C]

I love those.

[B]

Ariana Grande, another person you could pick up. Definitely right to that.

[C]

And, like, not. And it's no shade to any of the other cast members of all time, who are amazing. But, like, I'm talking about, like, you know, the best hosts of all time. Like, you have to put Gosling and Stone as two of the best hosts of all time.

[B]

I'm gonna go. Okay. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. Amy and Tina. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go feral.

[C]

Yeah. The reason I didn't do feral is

[B]

because I put Phil right.

[C]

Right.

[B]

This is. Listen, it's good for us to have, like, difference. Difference.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

I'm gonna put Farley because he's probably the funniest.

[C]

You know what? Let me change Leslie with Farley.

[B]

Okay. Yeah. Chaos.

[C]

I just didn't. I thought. Because I didn't. I thought if you're dead, you'd probably have a less of a chance being in my chaos. Well, but let's say I have that power.

[B]

You have the power of Farley.

[C]

Farley.

[B]

Unlock the.

[C]

Yeah, Farley.

[B]

I'm gonna put. I mean, it's. The thought of not having Eddie Murphy on there's insane.

[C]

Right?

[B]

I'm gonna put Meadows, because Meadows. Meadows is the. Literally. I saw Meadows do an improv show, and I was like, go into this.

[C]

He's the best improviser I've ever Played with. I like Tim. Tim could.

[B]

Scott,

[C]

who said it. But someone was like, Tim could squeeze a yes from a rock. You know, like, you could do nothing. And he'll make you look amazing.

[B]

I love him so much. I gotta. I'm gonna put wig on there because.

[C]

Yeah. The best character of all time.

[B]

And then from my last one, I. God damn it. I. I think. I think I'm going, Fred. Yeah.

[C]

Freddy boy.

[B]

Fred. He's. I mean, like, you're. It's insane. Like, you could say to me, how could you not put Mike Myers on? How could you not put Sandman on Dina Carver's hand? How could you not put fucking space? But, like, I'm just. This is. Whatever this is at this moment, maybe it changes tonight.

[C]

But seven is also too little.

[B]

It's too little.

[C]

Seven's too little.

[B]

That's what the original cast was.

[C]

I know, but that's why. It's. That's why. But it grew right after Seven's too little. Because you and Lauren knew that. Lauren's like, you need, like, a little boy. You need, like, a Marcello or an Andy.

[B]

You need a little boy.

[C]

You need a little boy. You need Marcelo and Andy a David.

[B]

Those ladies love Marcelo.

[C]

He's awesome.

[B]

He's so cool. I hung out with him and I was like, so fucking funny. I'm gonna drink your blood.

[C]

I know. And I'm a vampire. You. You know, he was addicted to me right away in the goes. You're too old to be wearing that hat. I was wearing, like, a baseball hat, and I was like, come here, you little. I want to make out with you. I want to make out with you. I want to siphon your energy.

[B]

Come here, kiss me.

[C]

Come here, kiss me. Make me young. I'm going to make a painting of you and put in my attic.

[B]

I would also have to add Jim Brewer, Rob Schneider, and Victoria Jackson. You got to get a couple reactions.

[C]

Well, because you like their politics.

[B]

Yeah. I love you. Like the, like, like, 1% of SNL

[C]

cast members who have gone off the reservation.

[B]

Do you see Rob Schneider, like, do. Stan made a video to get, like, Viktor Orban reelected in Hungary.

[C]

No.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Why is he involved in that? Because, like, why is Schneider.

[B]

Because Viktor Orban in Hungary has become, like, a pet project of, like, the American right wing. Because he's, like, a authoritarian right?

[C]

It's like.

[B]

But it's so funny to imagine, like, a Hungarian swing voter being like, I do not know who to vote for.

[C]

Yeah, but I saw. You can do it. He. I will vote for him, I'm just doing back to Nick Rivian. It's the only thing I can do is eat. I like him. I love the guy from this Bigelow. And now I've cast my vote. The Manimal.

[B]

In Hungary, we tag the movie the

[C]

Animal and we call it the Manimal.

[B]

Who was the. We talked about the best host and I think, yeah, you're looking at like S Tiers, Gosling Stone. But who's the worst host you've ever seen? Tough, because I remember as a kid,

[C]

I mean I hated like when like politicians would host. It was horrible.

[B]

Very bad. Like very like Al Gorb's very.

[C]

John McCain.

[B]

John McCain. Yeah, yeah.

[C]

Bob Dole.

[B]

Very bad.

[C]

Terrible, terrible.

[B]

Because you like oh, Bob Dole, you're going to be funnier than Norm MacDonald playing you. Get the out of here.

[C]

I love it when an athlete hosts mostly great.

[B]

Jordan Barkley, Kelsey Kelsey. Very good.

[C]

I like an athlete.

[B]

You know, I like, I like an athlete. But at the flip side of that, I remember as a child, I remember very clearly being like 6 or 7 and George Steinbrenner hosted and I was like, oh, that was bad. Who the fuck is this old asshole,

[C]

you know, who's running through my mind as a, as a, as a bad. Because Peyton Manning's also a good host.

[B]

Great host.

[C]

But you know what's running my mind is a bad host. But I, I, man, I don't know if Wayne Gretzky hosted once, right. With like Stuart Smiley. Did like a Stuart Smiley.

[B]

He's very stiff.

[C]

Wayne.

[B]

Awful. I know. Which is where he's Canadian. You think he'd be funny.

[C]

Yeah, but not all Canadians are funny. A lot of them are just like vapid.

[B]

The, the, the best host though, in terms of introducing the musical guest

[C]

Will, I mean, Adrian Brode Yaman.

[B]

Give it up, man, for Sean John.

[C]

Ba ba ba ba. Two Oscars.

[B]

There is a clip of two time Oscar winner Adrien Brody in a Jamaican hat in like one of those Jamaican hats that has dreadlocks attached that you buy in front of the Port Authority.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And he played like a Rastaman introducing Sean Paul. And it is awesome. Okay, Adam Pally, you take one of those cards, you're going to ask your boy a question.

[C]

Very excited about this. Okay. The best selling beer in the world by volume is a lager that probably most Americans haven't tried or even seen in the US Name the beer and the country. It's largely sold in.

[B]

What, what is the best selling beer in the world? I'm guessing It's a Chinese beer. I'm gonna say Ching Tao.

[C]

It's a good. You got half it right. It is from China.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

But it's. It's a brand called Snow, which I've never heard of.

[B]

Snow.

[C]

I've only heard of Snow is, like, informative,

[B]

And I make it for the Americans that never had it. I was thinking Jon Snow. I hate that I got that wrong. I hate you.

[C]

I'm sorry.

[B]

That sucks.

[C]

I can't believe it. When was the last time you got a question wrong?

[B]

All the time.

[C]

Really? You're like a.

[B]

All the time? No, but Annabelle, who does the questions, hates me.

[C]

It's, like, supposed to be your show where you're so smart, and each time it's, like, supposed to be a deep, like, crazy hard question that you get right. And each one you're like.

[B]

But I tell her, I'm like, make them hard. Make them hard. Because I don't want to, like, be like, you know, I don't be like Bill Murray in Groundhog Day when he's watching Jeopardy. So she, like, is like. She finds these questions and, like, I'm going to probably lose to you, and you'll be, like, the third person I've lost to. But she's amazing. So hard.

[C]

I've never heard of Snow. Supposed to be like, Stump Ike, if

[B]

you put a gun to my head and we're like, what is a Chinese beer? I would never come up with the word snow. Is that even Mandarin? Oh, my God. Are you a beer boy?

[C]

I don't know. I got to stay thin.

[B]

I know. I, I. If. If I had my druthers.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

If I was, like, in any other

[C]

business, I would drink beer.

[B]

I would have a beer every goddamn day. I love.

[C]

I love a cold beer. Like, but I can't remember the last time I, like, let myself have one.

[B]

I normally, around the holidays, my little luxury is I like. I like when I go to, like, you know, a booze shop and they have, like, the fancy beer that's from Belgium, and it has, like, a pig is dressed as a fry and the

[C]

alcohol limit is, like, 79.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

You drink, like, one beer and you're like, like, ripped that it is the best tasting thing, like, Guinness. I could drink a Guinness.

[C]

I love a Guinness.

[B]

But it. Nothing bloats us Jewish fellas more than a beer. Nothing bloats Jewish fellas more than a beer. I'm Sam Elliot.

[C]

That's true. Welcome back to Jewish cowboy talk.

[B]

Welcome back to Jewish cowboy. We're talking beer, bloat.

[C]

You know, the first CVS was actually invented in Montana by a young man

[B]

named Ziggerfeld, where I'm not from. I'm actually, I'm from, I believe, Portland, Oregon.

[C]

Yeah, Portland, Oregon. We've traveled out there looking for gold and set up shops selling prescriptions.

[B]

Every episode of this podcast, I imitate Sam Elliott at some point. Sam, we'd love to have you on the show. You and I do love to have a sip.

[C]

Oh, I like to have to have a sip.

[B]

Yeah. We were both martini boys.

[C]

I love martini. There's nothing. But you and I also share the thing that is, like, to me, there's nothing, like, what are we living for? The one thing we're living for is like a nice dinner out.

[B]

That's all I want.

[C]

With, like a really good meal. And then you're like, it's delicious. And you have a couple drinks and then you like, maybe have a cigarette and go home. Like that is.

[B]

When we were in New York, we

[C]

did that a couple months ago. Yeah.

[B]

We had like a, like 6pm dinner.

[C]

Extravagant.

[B]

Extravagant at, like this Milos.

[C]

My favorite spots.

[B]

One of the best bets in New York. And we had what I would call the perfect meal.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Delicious food, few drinks, walked home, had a puff. Love you.

[C]

Love you.

[B]

Went our separate ways.

[C]

I was in bed.

[B]

Different gay clubs.

[C]

I was in bed by 10.

[B]

Partied our balls off.

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

Took Molly orgy.

[C]

Yep. And I was still able to drive. The kids.

[B]

Went to the spa. You drove your kids to work? I drove some other kids to work. Not even my kids.

[C]

Thank you for doing that, by the

[B]

way, because it's my pleasure.

[C]

When I saw those poor kids, I knew they had to get to school. And you were the only one up.

[B]

It is. I haven't, like, had a party night in New York City in a long time, but I remember back in the day when you would walk out of an apartment at like 7am after partying, and you would see people like kids going to school and stockbrokers going to work. And I was like, I feel alive.

[C]

I think I would die if that happened. Now.

[B]

From sauce to dust to nuggets. It's Taco Bell's new Diablo Dusted Crispy Chicken Nuggets.

[C]

Are they mild?

[B]

If they were mild, they'd have to

[C]

change the name to Little Rascal Nuggets

[B]

or Minor Nuisance Nuggets. Definitely Diablo. New Diablo Dusted Crispy Chicken Nuggets. A brand new classic only at Taco bell. At participating U.S. taco Bell locations for a limited time and while supplies last.

[A]

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[C]

I think that I would like. My body would like. I don't think I could do it

[B]

if I'm in a non work situation where it is 1:00am and I'm still awake. Call the 911.

[C]

Yeah, call the. Call the police. Call the police and call and. Because it's like. And the next week is going to be hell. I'm gonna be like, I'm gonna be off. I'm gonna be like foggy. I'm gonna feel like my back hurts.

[B]

Diarrhea.

[C]

Yeah, diarrhea is a given. I get diarrhea from a mosquito bite.

[B]

I'm asking you a question about grunge. This question is gonna be totally grungified.

[C]

Cool.

[B]

Ba ba ba. Grunge got a little momentum when Soundgarden released Louder than Love in 1989 and that hit hit the Billboard charts. But it didn't really cross over until 1991 when this band's album hit number one, replacing Michael Jackson's dangerous Name the

[C]

band and the album Nirvana in utero.

[B]

We are gonna give you half a point for that. It is nervous.

[C]

Oh, not in utero. The second one. Never mind.

[B]

Never mind. We're gonna give you the point real quick.

[C]

Never mind.

[B]

Bonus question. Their biggest hit on the album is Smells Like Teen Spirit. What is Teen Spirit?

[C]

Is it a deodorant?

[B]

It is a deodorant. Adam Pally, you got like four points now.

[C]

Ads pretty good. I can't believe I said I needed it right off the bat, but I was like thinking. Because the reason I said that to defend myself to the grunge heads out there is cause a lot of people think Nevermind is their first album, but it's not.

[B]

No, no. An album called Bleach.

[C]

Bleach, yes. Which was before Dave Grohl joined engineered

[B]

by the great Steve Albini. Rest in peace King. One of the all time coolest guys ever.

[C]

I did an ask guy where he did monologues.

[B]

Oh my God, it was awesome.

[C]

Awesome. He.

[B]

Yeah, he's a big Chicago boy. Passed away a couple years ago of a heart attack. But one of the legends. I love too, that he was basically a producer, but he's like, I'm not a producer, I'm a music engineer.

[C]

Yeah. No, he's. So he was just like plugging in.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

In that. In that mechanics outfit that he. I hope they buried him in that. They definitely did.

[B]

I bet they did. That was his thing.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh, man. I love.

[C]

I'd want to be buried in like a. Because Jews don't look under the hood.

[B]

Right.

[C]

You know, it's like we let it go.

[B]

I kind of wanted them. I want an open casket.

[C]

Really?

[B]

I want to do an open casket, Russian gangster style. I've been heavily made up. I'm wearing like a. Like a very expensive looking suit.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And I'm just surrounded by, like, artifacts from my life.

[C]

I want a 12 piece brass New Orleans band.

[B]

Wow.

[C]

To like walk me out. And I want to be in some kind of bit costume just in case there's like, Dracula. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. That's funny. If you're like. But like. Like a. Like a CVS drag.

[C]

Yes. Like, with like the makeup.

[B]

Like Joe Flaherty on snl.

[C]

Exactly. Just in case, like, someone does have to dig it up or whatever. And then they're like, was this Dracula? Guys, guys. Adam Pally was Dracula.

[B]

The teeth are still here and they. They look plastic. Why would he be buried?

[C]

Why would he do that? This guy was wearing a cape.

[B]

I love the Russian caskets. Like, when you go to Hollywood forever and you see like, Zlatan, blah, blah, blah, and it's like a tombstone that has AI video of their life playing perpetually.

[C]

Would you ever, like,

[B]

Moss Mausoleum?

[C]

Mausoleum it.

[B]

I want to mausoleum it. And it has like. It's like a mini Paley. Center of my life. It has screens everywhere.

[C]

And there's like Mindy Projects playing your mad TV character.

[B]

Mad tv. A little Eastbound and Down. There's a small, little bathroom.

[C]

You know, a bathroom is good. Like. But the only thing I really want is a bench. Because I feel like people. I hate going to the cemetery. It gives me no comfort.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

But every time I'm there, I'm like, I wish there was a fucking bench.

[B]

A bench is nice. A little toilet would be nice. How many times have you been in a mausoleum? And you're like, I have to piss so bad.

[C]

And it's so hard to find anything to cover up when you do shit.

[B]

Put a little pile of shit on someone's grave and pretend it's flowers.

[C]

I just put a bunch of rocks on it and pretend that they're my uncle.

[B]

This was our thing.

[C]

Do you.

[B]

Wet Wipe. When did you first get into grunge? How old were you?

[C]

I was young. I think probably Nirvana did it, but that was the theme of. My actual. Theme of my bar mitzvah was grunge. Was grunge. And everybody was at a different, like, musical table.

[B]

Yeah. So I read my Haftorah. Or I didn't. Whatever.

[C]

Oh, no. I read it in, like, a deep. Eddie Vedder. Like, grr.

[B]

Well, Eddie Vedder, when you say that, he does sound like he's speaking a cantor.

[C]

I, like, faked what I didn't know. And it was basically like hearing Yellow Leadbetter. Running through it. At the end, you're just like. Yeah. But then I really. I actually got suspended because of it, because I made a mistake and my mom made a mistake. We. I wanted to give, like, a mix out as the. You know, as a giveaway. And so I put my favorite. I, like, spent all night, like, putting my favorite songs onto the cassette and whatever. And the last song on the album was the Rage against the Machine.

[B]

Fuck you. I won't do what you tell me.

[C]

Yeah. Killing the name and. And, like, a lot of phone call.

[B]

How dare you.

[C]

Yep.

[B]

Joshua is listening to these filthy words 100 now.

[C]

Joshua won't do when I tell him it's your fault. His son's fault.

[B]

He. Joshua said that some of the evil forces are the ones that burn crosses.

[C]

When Rebecca's out here jumping around burning

[B]

crosses, she just told the cop to go himself. It's Fran Drasher, by the way. How dare you let my son listen to this? I got into grunge nirvana came out, like, as I went into high school, and I transferred from my, like, tiny little school into, like, a bigger high school. Slightly bigger high school.

[C]

And where was. You were in Chicago. I know, but you were in the city, right?

[B]

We grew up in the city and

[C]

I was at a. One of my few friends. I know that, like, Daniel Libman, half in the city.

[B]

Right. Right. Most folks grow up like, Like, Chicago adjacent. They say Chicago.

[C]

I was.

[B]

I would like Skokie, Evanston, Oak Park. These are Chicago.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

If you could take the.

[C]

You could take the L. If you could take the L. Chicago.

[B]

But, like, I went to, like, a tiny little Jewish school, and I was like, a big Billy Joel Beatles boy.

[C]

Of course. Yeah.

[B]

And then I show up to high school and like this. Within a month, like, Nevermind and the Chronic come out.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

So I've, like, changed my entire personality.

[C]

Our Life has changed.

[B]

I have to untuck my plaid shirt now.

[C]

What I know. And like, it's true. But then you do come back to it. Like, I feel like there is a whole bunch of us, like normal, like normal open minded of our generation. Like, I don't know what we're called, like, generation.

[B]

I'm an Xer. You're a little bit younger than me. You might be a millennial. What year were you born?

[C]

1982.

[B]

I think you are literally the cutoff.

[C]

Right.

[B]

So you're a millennial.

[C]

Okay, so.

[B]

Or an excellent xennial.

[C]

There's like a millennial Gen Xer. Like, like it's very well rounded. Most of my friends have a very well rounded, like music scope. And it's like shocking when you go older or younger.

[B]

Yes.

[C]

How non. How like niche it is.

[B]

No, no. I'm literally like everything except like modern country.

[C]

Yeah, me too.

[B]

It's like that shit sucks.

[C]

There's very little that I can't listen to. Except like my beer and my truck.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. My beer, my truck. My bobble in my gun.

[C]

Yeah. I can't do that. But I can do some like Zach Brian.

[B]

Zach Bryant's.

[C]

I can. I can do something.

[B]

See the one that did Fast car.

[C]

No, no, that's Luke Bryan. That's Luke Bryan.

[B]

He's good too. Yeah, I can.

[C]

I can like get there.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Like.

[B]

Like Kenny Chesney never hit me.

[C]

Jelly Roll.

[B]

Yeah. Thank you. Jelly Roll. Jelly Roll.

[C]

What?

[B]

I can't.

[C]

Fuck.

[B]

Fuck. Jelly Roll.

[C]

Fuck, man. Jelly Roll is a thing.

[B]

There is a scene on the show Tulsa King King featuring Jelly Roll. And I became a little obsessed with it.

[C]

You have to send it to me.

[B]

I'm gonna send it to you. It is fucking crazy. This is a thing that happened. I'm gonna leave it there. Grunge is so angsty. Were you like an angsty teen?

[C]

A little bit. I moved around a lot, so I was angst.

[B]

That leads to angst.

[C]

I was a loner.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

You know, until I found like, weed.

[B]

Weed? Yeah. Weed is a gateway to.

[C]

I took on comedy.

[B]

Really.

[C]

Like, I was a loner. Like, I remember when I moved from Chicago to New Jersey, it was like right before high school. And so I was like trying to make friends through sports.

[B]

Smart.

[C]

You know, because it's like. And when you're the new kid in high school, forget it.

[B]

It's so hard.

[C]

Everyone knows each other from middle school, you know, it's just so.

[B]

I did it, man. It's impossible.

[C]

It's impossible. And so it Wasn't until I, like, really. Which probably made me work harder at being funny without knowing it. It wasn't until, like, sophomore year, where I was like, the class clown and, like, doing sketches on the announcements.

[B]

Right, right, right, right.

[C]

To, like, find my groove.

[B]

I wasn't angsty. I wasn't. I was like. I had that stress of trying to find my friend group, but once I did, like, for me, like, I was just like, I want to watch Michael Jordan and I want to just find a quiet place to go.

[C]

But I think that's a. I think

[B]

you know what I mean? Like, that's like dictated almost everywhere.

[C]

It's weird because your trailer was also always blaring. The music was so loud.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. Well, sometimes you combine your hobbies, but.

[C]

No, I was gonna say. I think that is from your. I would say from. You are one of the least angsty. Forget kids. Humans. I know you have. No. I think probably one of the attributes to your success is the lack of bitterness at others. You don't have that.

[B]

I don't. That is true. I'm not bitter. I have a lot of other shit that. I'm not bitter.

[C]

You never look at other people and go, why not me? That's just not your vibe. You're just like, I'm doing what I'm doing.

[B]

Yes. My angst manifest more in what Tina Fey calls world nerves, where I'm like, got another war. You know what I mean? That's the shit where I'm like, no fun, no bueno.

[C]

It's hard. It's hard now, especially to shut that out and just keep on your world.

[B]

But you're an actual musician.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Well, literally in your blood. Your parents are musicians. You can play. You have an amazing HBO special if you want to watch a very funny HBO special.

[C]

Thank you.

[B]

Come out and you go, hey, I'm gonna bum everyone. I'm gonna bring my guitar out now.

[C]

No one likes to see a guitar.

[B]

Were you ever in a band?

[C]

Yes.

[B]

In high school?

[C]

Yes.

[B]

What was this band called?

[C]

It was called Inbred Jed.

[B]

That is such a 1999 ass name.

[C]

Yeah. It was terrible. It's terrible.

[B]

What were you? Who. What was the band? What was the. I think I could pretty much.

[C]

You probably know. All rock. Yeah, the sound was pretty fuzzy.

[B]

How many folks you got in there who.

[C]

It was a four piece. Me, my friend Jacob on bass. My friend Erez on guitar, may he rest.

[B]

We're 45, we're 45, we're dying.

[C]

And my friend Teddy on drums, who we used his house. And then he quit. Cause he was a swimmer and it was during swim practice.

[B]

Guys, I love our sound. I do, but I got the Bentley Company that conversation.

[C]

He's like, look, I'm just taking a look at what I like. And I think I like swimming.

[B]

I gotta look at what is the better career path for me. And right now that's swimming.

[C]

Like, dude, you're a 4 foot 7 Jew from Livingston, New Jersey. Like, you're gonna be as. Alright, swim away, drummer boy.

[B]

I joined a band, very briefly. So in the midst of the grunge mania, our dear friend Dave Stassum.

[C]

Do you play an instrument?

[B]

Do I. Yeah, I don't play shit.

[C]

I was gonna say, I've never heard you even sing.

[B]

I'm just trying to learn the skin flute. Dave Thassen, who we love, you gotta

[C]

stop trying to blow on that.

[B]

I'm saying I'm trying. Dave Stassen and my friend Brian Green and Clark Freeman were like, let's start our own band.

[C]

Stassen plays an instrument.

[B]

No, no. Where did this go? So they started a band. They called it Slobotnik Park. There was a wonderful Polish family that worked at our school for years called the Slobotniks. And they took like, whatever, three chairs outside. They're like, you have your own park now. So they called the band Slobotnik Park. And they were terrible, but they were like one. They came to me like, hey, we want to maybe try you being the lead singer. And I was like, yeah, yeah, dude. I'll be like, Kurt Cobain. Don't mind if I do.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And we went down.

[C]

Finally someone noticed, finally, this talent that

[B]

I've been sitting in. So we go down to Stassen's basement and we record. And they had the song they had written. And I get on the mic and I sing it and they play it back. And it only isolated my voice. It didn't pick up any of the instruments. And they were like, yeah, we're not gonna. Let's just go upstairs and watch Last of the Mohicans. We're not gonna.

[C]

We don't have to be a band anymore.

[B]

And then they kept making music without me, which, hey, they were right. They were right and they sucked. So fuck you guys. Fuck you, Clark, Dave and Brian.

[C]

Yeah, but like, I remember that. I also remember this is a vague memory. I had like, I younger than that, when I was in like maybe fifth grade or something in Chicago. There was like, I would ride the bus back and Boys to Men had like just abc bbd. Yeah. Abc.

[B]

Bbd.

[C]

East Coast Family. Yeah. Never skip the beat. Yeah. So I was, like, thought of myself as, like, a crooner, you know?

[B]

You thought you could be in Boyz II Men.

[C]

I just thought. I thought of myself as, like, an R and B crooner a little bit, you know? And, like, I would. You know, like, I would sing to myself, like, on the. We'd go to the End of the Road, and I would, like, really take it seriously. So one day we went to Six Flags. What was it called? It was, like. It was, like, near Erie in the Tri State area. Yeah. It was literally in Indiana. Oh.

[B]

Oh, great America.

[C]

Yeah, Great America. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And they had, like, a booth, a recording booth that you could go to.

[B]

Oh, shit.

[C]

And so everyone went on, like, my whole class went on the ride, and I went to the recording booth and, like, had, like, 20 bucks, spent up and spent the money to record End of the Road.

[B]

And Seth Meyers has sent us that clip. Go ahead. And

[C]

I remember. I don't know what happened, that tape, but I remember, like, getting home and listening to it and being like, oh, I'm not. I can't.

[B]

I'm a piece of shit. I'm a white piece of shit.

[C]

Or just like, how did I.

[B]

How stupid. White, Jewish.

[C]

It sounds horrible. And, like, I feel like I was, like, my mom must have been lying to me.

[B]

It's 1991. But you're older. You're living in Olympia, Washington.

[C]

Oh.

[B]

You're part of the scene. You see Carrie Brownstein. You have a crush on her. You're in the middle of the cultural shift. You start a grunge band. Yes. What is it called? What's your first album? What's the hit single?

[C]

Okay, great question. I think. I think at the time, no one was naming stuff after the actual part of the country they were coming from. Right.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

No. And I think that was a miss. Like, we could have used a band, like a grunge band.

[B]

70s. We had that, but it was gone for a while. We had Kansas and, yes, Boston. But it went away.

[C]

But it went away.

[B]

And that's too broad. You want, like. Like your town.

[C]

Yeah. But, like, so. So oddly, like, I really like something like Olympia, Washington, as a band name.

[B]

Pretty fucking cool.

[C]

You know, I think that that, like. That, like, goes good. And then it's 1991, so we're in Iraq. Right. And things are kind of like, little malaise. Little malaise is over. There's, like, a 90s recession has hit. Yeah. I was gonna say like, there's like, a mini feeling in America that, like, maybe we're not exceptional.

[B]

Yeah, Right. Beginning of the end of American hegemony.

[C]

Right. So then I feel like my first. Our first single off our first album would be called Same As It Ever Wasn't.

[B]

Very good. Very good.

[C]

And the first single would be called Jeb.

[B]

Because you knew the president had a son named Jeb.

[C]

I just would have. It would have been. Yeah. It would have been like. Because I knew he had sons. Yeah. And, like, I knew the president, and it would have been one of those things where it's like, let's name it about the dumb one.

[B]

The dumbest one.

[C]

The dumbest.

[B]

And then you're like, oh, my God.

[C]

The other was way dumb.

[B]

Should have called it W. He's painting.

[C]

They got him in a basement.

[B]

He's painting like children. Learn how to paint. I'm calling my band Gunt. Yeah, we are.

[C]

But. But people don't know what that means yet.

[B]

It's before Gunt was popular.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

Which is just like, you got a belly.

[C]

It's almost like Gun T. Gun T

[B]

would actually be a little bit nicer. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The album is Generation X Men.

[C]

Yeah. You're a little bit of a dork.

[B]

Yeah. A little bit of a nerd.

[C]

It's like math rock.

[B]

Even though our drummers are girls.

[C]

Right. Of course. Yeah.

[B]

And the hit single is I Don't Even Give a Shit Anymore.

[C]

Yeah, anymore. Which means that at a time, you did. Can I ask you a question?

[B]

One last thing I want to say.

[C]

Okay. Then I'll put this.

[B]

Did you know the Sun. Did you know the song Black Hole sun is actually about your butthole? Please ask me a question.

[C]

I did know that because I had to sign the rights away.

[B]

They're making a biopic about your butthole.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And Black Hole Sun.

[C]

It's called Black Hole Sun. Colt. It's about my son.

[B]

Adam Pally's about to ask me a question.

[C]

Here we go. Question. Oh, I like this. This is a good one. At New Orleans Mardi Gras, the honorary title of King Bacchus is traditionally given to a major public figure. And in one rare case, it went to two generations of the same family. What famous father and son were each crowned King Bacchus?

[B]

Is there a hint or a clue?

[C]

Yes.

[B]

I'll take it.

[C]

I feel like the hint is going to give away the answer.

[B]

Okay, okay.

[C]

Too much. So I'm going to give.

[B]

Just tell me what field they're in. Like, are these.

[C]

Entertainment is a broad because they are both entertainers in different fields.

[B]

What? Yeah.

[C]

Yes. The father and son.

[B]

So, like, the father is a singer and the son is an actor.

[C]

Could be. Or reversed.

[B]

So the father is an actor and the son is a singer. Who. Who. Who the shit is that, man?

[C]

Can we tell you?

[B]

Hold on. Don't tell me yet. The father is a singer.

[C]

I can give you another. I can give you.

[B]

Give me another clue.

[C]

The son had his biggest hit that was later litigated to be too reminiscent of a Marvin Gaye song.

[B]

Okay, I know it. I know it. The answer is Alan and Robin Thick.

[C]

That's correct. You are correct.

[B]

Fuck, yes. Listen, I needed that clue.

[C]

No problem.

[B]

Because I was like, I don't know, Archie and Peyton Manning.

[C]

Yeah, I remember Archie's kind of banjo album.

[B]

That is awesome that I got that. I'm feeling good.

[C]

You should be. You should be. That was a good one.

[B]

I'm gonna ask you a question now about a subject that is very near and dear to your heart. Here we go, your third topic. What character was Dr. John Thackeray's primary nurse?

[C]

What?

[B]

The answer is Lucy Elkins. You said you know a lot about the Nick.

[C]

No, this is the New York Knicks.

[B]

The New York Knicks.

[C]

Not the Clive Owens. Not the. Not the Clive Os.

[B]

Steven Soderbergh show.

[C]

No, no, not the Clive.

[B]

Have you seen the Steven Soderbergh show?

[C]

Just. I saw, like, the pilot where he put the cocaine in his dick. I think was like, where I kind of ended.

[B]

All of my questions now are about the show. The Knick.

[C]

Well, let me try. Give me.

[B]

I'm joking. Bing bong. New York Knicks. Bing bong. Fuck your life. Oh, bing bong bong. I show people that, like, when I meet them now, I'm like, hey, Ike, nice to meet you. You've seen the Bing bong video, right? Bing bong.

[C]

Fuck your life.

[B]

Ariana Grande. Mama. Come here and get some of these dogs. Yo, man, what do you want to say to Joe Biden? Hey, man, take me to dinner. Hey, yo. All right. Real freaking question. While it has been some years since their last championship, The Knicks first NBA title came in 1970, in no small part because of their captain, who entered game seven after a major injury in game five. Who was their center and what number did he wear?

[C]

Oh, my God. That team is Walt. Walt, Clyde and Earl of Pearl. And then you have Debusher and Bradley and fucking what? Willis Reed.

[B]

Boom.

[C]

Number 18.

[B]

Oh, so close. 19. Yes. I'm gonna give it to you. You even got the bonus I was gonna ask you to round out the starting five and you just did. With Dave debusscher. Adam. Pali. You're fucking crushing it.

[C]

I can't believe I know this much about anything.

[B]

You. You really do. You're doing very well. I don't think you've gotten anything wrong.

[C]

I'm plugged in.

[B]

What was your first Knicks game?

[C]

Oh, I got a good one. Four point play.

[B]

Four point play.

[C]

My first Knicks game. Madison Square Garden. Because I was a kid.

[B]

Tucker.

[C]

No, Larry Johnson.

[B]

Oh, Larry Johnson. Right.

[C]

Trent. Larry Johnson. Four point play. I was a kid. 82 to 86. We lived in Stuyvesant town and there's no point taking a four year old to the Garden. So we just like, never went. But when we moved to New York, my dad would take me all the time to see Jordan, so. But I was still a Knick fan, you know? But those games were amazing.

[B]

Amazing.

[C]

So I saw the Knicks play more in Chicago than I did in the Garden. And then in the 90s, I think it was like 92. My dad got playoff tickets from, like a drug rep, you know, like. Right, right. And we were in, like, all the way at the top and he hit that.

[B]

We make a. Lestra, we'd love to give you some tickets.

[C]

No joke. It was like, have you ever heard of a statin? Here's two tickets to the Knicks versus the Indiana Pacers. If you prescribe these to some fat people. My dad was like, great, Adam, we're going to the Nick game. We're getting on the train. I was like, what?

[B]

What? Amazing. That is very, very good.

[C]

Do you get one?

[B]

Because I like the Knicks.

[C]

I know that's not as much as

[B]

I like the Sixers.

[C]

I know that's right.

[B]

Sorry. The Jan Sixers. I like them. I think they're good, patriotic Americans. I think it's cool that they broke into Steny Hoyer's office and took a.

[C]

Do you know how many people sent me the picture of the guy? I know, the head, including you that were like, hey, pal, I'd say, want to get lunch like, on January 6th? Like. And I was like, I don't even look. I didn't think I looked like that guy.

[B]

You didn't not look.

[C]

I did not look like him. I know, but, like, it was just disturbing to me. And like, still now I do feel like if I wear a flannel shirt, I have to, like, assure people I wasn't at January 6th.

[B]

You do present a little January 6th.

[C]

Wow, how I'm so Jewish.

[B]

I Know, but there's just, there's just

[C]

something about me that screams like, like sedition. Miss, like background actor on Mr. Show.

[B]

How many Knicks games are you going to a year? And are you bringing your kids?

[C]

Yes. Oh, yeah, we go to, we. I would say we go to like less than you think because it really is expensive.

[B]

Yeah, it's, it's tight, it's prohibited.

[C]

But we go to, we try to get there out like four or five times a year.

[B]

Let me ask you this question. You, one of your beautiful children, years from now, they meet someone from Indianapolis and they fall in love, madly in love, and they just start to become a Pacers fan. How do you handle this?

[C]

I become a Pacers fan. I don't care.

[B]

You don't care?

[C]

I love my children.

[B]

You love your children more? You love your children more than you love your basketball team? Yeah, I'm the same way, man. I don't care. Even like what's the worst case scenario? My daughter marries someone from St. Louis.

[C]

Right.

[B]

And she becomes a Cardinal fans fan. Which is as rough as that would be. I would instantly get over it.

[C]

I learned it from my father in law too. My father in law was a big macha in the travel industry.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

And like he high school dropout, like super impressive guy. Like self made, high school dropout, self made man. Formed this travel agency, grew it, grew it, grew it. And by the time he passed away, he was representing the New York Giants, which was his football team. That was his football team. And then I come along, Mary's daughter, and he's like, what's your favorite team? I'm like, jets. He's like, what's your second favorite team? Like Bears. He's like, motherfucker.

[B]

That's tough. Your second favorite team's an NFC team?

[C]

Yeah. I'm like, well, I moved to Chicago, you know, like, I love the Bears. So it's like that's, it's hard, you know? But he didn't even flinch an eye. And then he would like casually if like a Jet game came across his thing, be like, you want to go

[B]

with a Jet game?

[C]

Like, he never.

[B]

What a prince.

[C]

He was a prince. King and a prince. Never fuck with me like that.

[B]

No, no, I would, I would never be a dick. I'm gonna say to my daughter, you can marry anyone as long as they're not a Republican.

[C]

Oh, they won't be around by the time.

[B]

Hold on. Here we go. Okay. We were on the Mindy Project together.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

Beloved show. My kids are obsessed with it.

[C]

Really that's so nice.

[B]

We were talking today.

[C]

They were like, oh, my God, Peter, that's so nice. But some of them are my best work. I think that episode with you and I in the bathroom is, like, our best work.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Mindy wrote that. Incredible.

[C]

Yep.

[B]

We are. Take our cast. We are a basketball team. What are our positions?

[C]

Which year is it? The first year. Like the one that. Or the first and second year? The one that the most. Well, Mindy's playing point.

[B]

Mindy's point.

[C]

Right. Because unless she's Jokic. You know what? I think Mindy's playing center.

[B]

So she's like a passing center. Like Jokic.

[C]

Triple double every night.

[B]

Triple double every night.

[C]

Because she's. She's writing it, producing it, and making you look amazing.

[B]

And they're the same height. People forget Mindy's 7:1.

[C]

Easy, easy.

[B]

I like. That's a very good answer.

[C]

So I'm going to say that Mindy is our point center.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

And then I'm going to say the coach on the sideline is. Is Stas great? Like, in, like a hot. In, like, a high suit?

[B]

Yeah. In like. Like a. Like a Doug Moe suit.

[C]

Run it faster. I gotta get home.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

Ooh, custard. Only motherfucker in Hollywood that orders a custard truck loves that custard. I'm always like, dave, fuck.

[B]

He's a sweet boy.

[C]

And then. Loves his sweets, loves his custard. People be like, how am I. How do I eat this? He'd be like, with a spoon. Or. Or just shovel.

[B]

Just shove it. Or just push it in your eye.

[C]

All right. And then I would say you're playing the two.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

Or the one. No, you're playing point. You're playing point. Because you're also.

[B]

I distribute.

[C]

You're well. And you're also writing and producing with Dave. Yep.

[B]

When connected to him.

[C]

And when Mindy's up there.

[B]

Yep, yep.

[C]

You're a coach on the floor. I think I'm playing the two.

[B]

Yes.

[C]

I'm playing a two. Two. I'm streaky. I think Zosia's at the three.

[B]

Yes.

[C]

And then Ed at the four.

[B]

Ed at the four. He's the worst athlete ever.

[C]

Ed at the four. Cause you can hide him on defense.

[B]

Remember the episode where we played basketball? The joke was that he sucks at basketball. And he was so bad at basketball that we were like, it almost doesn't work now.

[C]

I remember being to him, like, I understand that, like, it's hard to coordinate with a basketball. Cause it's like you're new at it, but you run, right? Like, you know soccer, you know football. No, not Ed.

[B]

No, not Little Lord Fauntleroy. No.

[C]

Ed knows fencing.

[B]

On God, I'm a bit of a ball jog guy. We love you, Ed. We got to get his ass on here, and I think he's.

[C]

He's about to have a little run.

[B]

I saw that Eddie is gearing up for run.

[C]

Yeah. You know what? I forgot Messina in that. But I feel like Messina would be six man.

[B]

Six man. And then Fortune and. And later.

[C]

That's our bench. They're our bench. Yeah, but. But I feel like Messina would be six man.

[B]

Okay, I'm gonna name a Knicks fan.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

And you're gonna give me a number from 1 to 10 in regards to their Nick fandom.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

Or what you think of them.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

Stiller.

[C]

One.

[B]

Tracy Morgan.

[C]

One.

[B]

Matt Dillon, three. Chalamet.

[C]

Look, I want to say one I love.

[B]

I love. And one is the best.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh, okay. I thought it would be the best.

[C]

No, no, I think you got to be top tier, right? Like, top tier.

[B]

Oh, I got you. I got you.

[C]

Top tier.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

Like, I'm putting you in the top tier. Nick fan. Like, number one. Number one to me is like, Stiller.

[B]

Spike. Yes. Cardi. B.

[C]

Five, six down the list.

[B]

Rapaport.

[C]

I don't want to bother

[B]

which sports team has the coolest fans, because I just named the Knicks. Think about the Lakers. We got Jack, we got Denzel.

[C]

Andy Garcia is there, you know, a lot. I think that late. I just. I think the Knicks are. It's bigger lately. I mean, it's just like, no one filled the Jack gap. You thought it was gonna be Leo, but, like, he's.

[B]

Denzel's trying.

[C]

He's trying, but it's, like, late. It's too late. He's not young. Like, Jack was there in his heyday.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

Like, I thought it was gonna be Leo. I mean, maybe it's like Adam Levine for the Lakers. I don't know.

[B]

It's not Jack. It's not the same as Jack. No.

[C]

And like, the fact that. And look, Chalamet. I was gonna say the reason that I was like, I love him. I don't know if I can put him top tier is because he's just so. A list works so much.

[B]

And he's a true fan.

[C]

True fan. But he doesn't get to every.

[B]

Like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Spike's always there.

[C]

Spike and Ben's always there. Yeah. You see Ben. At the game. It's on Thursday night for. Versus the Hornets. You know, like.

[B]

But Chalamet's like, playoffs. Yeah.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

The Knicks have not won a championship in your lifetime.

[C]

That's correct.

[B]

Partially. This is my fault. Being from Chicago and having us. You guys just get.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

In the ass by us.

[C]

The 80s and 90s is like. You have Michael Jordan. You can. There's nothing you do.

[B]

Nothing you can do. I'm gonna name some things.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

And you tell me if you would do them. If it meant the Knicks were going to championship.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

Would you never eat chicken parm ever again for the Knicks to win a championship?

[C]

No.

[B]

Okay. Would you drink a quarter cup of your own urine?

[C]

A quarter of what? Like, quarter cup. Like, just a quarter cup? Yeah, Yeah, I do that.

[B]

Okay. Would you wear a MAGA hat throughout New York City for one month?

[C]

No.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

I know you thought these were all gonna be.

[B]

Yes, but you can only listen to Hoobastank. That means if you're at a party and there's different music playing, you have to walk up and be like, I'm putting on the hoob. I guess.

[C]

For how long? Like a year.

[B]

For a year.

[C]

Yeah. I would do that.

[B]

Okay. Every time you go on the red carpet for a thing, at one point a photographer captures you picking and eating a booger.

[C]

Oh, that's already. I'm fine with that. That's already happened every time.

[B]

What is your middle name?

[C]

Saul.

[B]

Would you change it to Stalin for five years? Yes. Adam Stalin, pally, 100%.

[C]

Doesn't even have a hard ring.

[B]

Okay. Every time you turn on your TV for the rest of your life, it's kill Tony.

[C]

Yeah. Because I feel like TV's antiquated at this point. Like, I just start screaming, man, you

[B]

are a grunge hipster.

[C]

Yeah, man, I can get away with a lot. The only thing I wouldn't do is stop eating chicken parm. I have to look at my life.

[B]

That one fucking hit a nerve. All right, ask me a question. Ask me my third question.

[C]

All right, great. I love it. I love it. Ike, this is right up your alley. All right? We got only five US Presidents have worn full beards well enough.

[B]

Yes, yes, yes.

[C]

Tell me.

[B]

Tell me them the only presidents that have.

[C]

Or. How about this? I'll cut it short. You don't have to give me all of them. Who had the longest beard? Oh, you're going to get this. I feel like.

[B]

Okay, let's just go through the beardos. Grant had a beard.

[C]

This is an interesting One.

[B]

Okay, so, okay. I definitely know Grant. The Harrisons.

[C]

Who had the longest beard?

[B]

Who had the longest beard in length.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh, Abe.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Okay. That is a crazy look. How did anyone work in a skateboard shop in 1993?

[C]

When I see it now, I'm like, that's what you decided on.

[B]

I know. And it's like, he's like, arguably our best president, an incredible man, and it's like, shave that gump ass hair off your chin, bitch.

[C]

Yeah. Although maybe that was, like, a big look in the gay community.

[B]

He was gay for sure. Two presidents, back to back.

[C]

Gay.

[B]

Him and Buchanan.

[C]

Buchanan was gay.

[B]

Only bachelor.

[C]

Oh. Oh. He was like the Lindsey Grant.

[B]

Literally. He was, like, completely analogous to Lindsey Graham.

[C]

Right.

[B]

Just like a southern, confirmed Southern bachelor.

[C]

A Southern boy who loves Disney World.

[B]

Pretty sure he was.

[C]

Ooh, I got a free week. I'm gonna go to the princess's castle.

[B]

I'm going to Bippity Boppity Boutique.

[C]

If we're gonna not be in session, then I will definitely be on Splash Mountain.

[B]

What if Lindsey G.R. went to Disney and went to Bippity Boppity Boutique and got a. Like, a JonBenet Ramsey makeover? And he came out just like a little American golf. Oh, my God. But Buchanan. Yeah, Buchanan.

[C]

That's interesting.

[B]

I don't think he was something, but he was definitely a.

[C]

It's almost like we were more evolved at that time. Even though everything was like, hush, hush.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Because it was like, just let the smartest people do.

[B]

Yeah, we were more evolved. Except for the slavery.

[C]

Yeah. Well, Abe.

[B]

Abe put a big dent in that.

[C]

Put a dent in it.

[B]

This goddamn stupid Shaggy beard. Fucking Scooby Doo.

[C]

He was Shaggy.

[B]

It is, like, wild that we've had two presidents in a row where just active brain death is happening, where just you watch them and you're like, oh, shit.

[C]

Yeah, it feels crazy.

[B]

They don't know what room is.

[C]

Feels crazy. How old, everybody. You know what I mean? Like, because we're getting old, too. Like, I feel old. Like, I'm old, but I still feel like there's so much more.

[B]

Oh, you know, it's crazy, the term gerontocracy, which is, like, when your government's just run by old people. It was conceived during, like, the height of the Soviet Union when it was, like, Brezhnev and stuff. And they were like, these guys are too old to run the politburo. And they were, like, in their, like, mid-60s.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And now we got, like, Trump, who's, like, 89 and dying and it's like, we're like, this is normal.

[C]

And everybody beneath him is also like, they're all fucking 80. And then it's like. And if they're not, there's someone's godson that like, has a secret.

[B]

J.D.

[C]

vance is just like, for some reason, like J.D. vance. It's like all. Everyone's like that, you know?

[B]

I think he is hot though. Speed round.

[C]

I think he's hot when he gets his touches.

[B]

Adam, Pally, are you ready?

[C]

Yes.

[B]

For the speed round. Speed round. All right, my friend, here's how the speed round works. All you have to do is answer as many questions as you can in 90 seconds. If you don't know the answer, say pass. We might come back to it. If you get it correct, I will say right or correct. If you get it wrong, I'll say wrong or incorrect and then you'll ask me.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

Are you ready?

[C]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

The clock starts now. Considered by many to be the best grunge guitarist ever. He was one of the founders of Alice in Chains.

[C]

Jerry Cantrell. Yes.

[B]

This Knicks 90s legend is their all time leader in three pointers.

[C]

He were Davis.

[B]

No. He hosted Weekend Update for the majority of the 1980s.

[C]

Dennis Miller.

[B]

Yes. What Seattle label signed Nirvana. Yes. Wayne's World was on public access. And what Aurora. Yes. What New York City high school legend ended up as a starting point guard for the Knicks in Stefan Marbury. Yes. Which SNL hosting legend played the Continental pass name Pearl Jam's debut album that went 13 times? Yes. What Nick Small forward was 1984 scoring. 1984 MVP scoring nearly 33 points.

[C]

Bernard King.

[B]

Yes. This actor holds a record for Most episodes of SNL hosted with 17.

[C]

Oh. Steve Martin.

[B]

No. What grunge supergroup did Chris Cornell assemble in 19? No. This man has. This man has coached the Knicks in twice as many games as the man who's coming second. No. Chris Rock played this character who hosted a show called the Dark side Pass. Name one other member of the OG Smashing Pumpkins besides Billy Corgan.

[C]

Darcy.

[B]

Yes. Who was the second anchor on Weekend Update?

[C]

The second anchor on ever of all time. Jane Curtin. Yeah.

[B]

Yes. Who holds a record for longest running female SNL cast member at 11 seasons from 2012 to 222.

[C]

Dratch.

[B]

The answer on that one was Cecily Strong. Oh, you did very well. I'm gonna go ahead and say I think he did better than anyone we've had on the show so far.

[C]

Wow.

[B]

Go through real quick a couple ones. You got wrong. The Knicks 90s legend was Johnny Starks.

[C]

John Starks.

[B]

SNL hosting legend who played the continental was. Chris Walken. Pearl Jam's debut album. You said 10. That is correct. Bernard King. You got the actor that holds the record for most episodes of SNL hosted. Alec Baldwin grunge supergroup. Chris Cornell. You got Temple the dog. You just got it. Too late. The Knicks. The man who's coached the Knicks in the most games. Red Holtzman.

[C]

Holtzman. I said the wrong Red.

[B]

Chris Rock played a lot of Jewish guys named red in the 50s.

[C]

Yeah. We should bring that back.

[B]

We got to bring that back.

[C]

I like that. Yeah.

[B]

Chris Rock played this character who hosted a show called the Dark side. That was Nat X. You got that right. You got Smashing Pumpkins, you got Jane Curtin, and you got. Dude.

[C]

It's pretty good.

[B]

That is really good. You are definitely one of our celeb MVPs.

[C]

Nice.

[B]

All right. I am ready now.

[C]

All right. Here we go. Who is considered the father of relativity?

[B]

Albert Einstein.

[C]

Correct. Aside from the Nile, what is the longest river in the world?

[B]

The longest river on the world is the Mississippi. Wrong. Who.

[C]

Who is the only US President to never get married? Married.

[B]

James Buchanan.

[C]

That right. Which American businessman ran the largest Ponzi scheme in U. S. History?

[B]

Bernard Madoff.

[C]

Got it. NFL hall of fame is located where?

[B]

Canton, Ohio.

[C]

Name at least two of the five brothers who made up the Jackson five.

[B]

Marlo and Tito. Which Marlon and Tito.

[C]

Which countries won the most world cups?

[B]

Brazil.

[C]

What renaissance artist is buried in Rome's pantheon?

[B]

Donatello.

[C]

Who performs the voice of Homer singer Simpson?

[B]

Dan Castellano.

[C]

What book holds the record for the fastest selling book in history?

[B]

The Bible. Who?

[C]

What is the world's most populated city?

[B]

Hong Kong.

[C]

In 1066, William the Conqueror won the English throne.

[B]

At this battle.

[C]

What was Bob Dylan's real last name?

[B]

Zimmerman.

[C]

What luxury brand is known for its iconic interlocking C logo?

[B]

Chanel.

[C]

Name. The Oklahoma City Thunder guard that was named Ambassador Shay. Who was the ancient Greek God of the sun?

[B]

Apollo.

[C]

Which US Military branch uses slogan. It's not just a job, it's an adventure.

[B]

The marines.

[C]

The name this group of Japanese feudal military leaders with real power under the shoguns. Which actress plays the character Holly Golightly in Breakfast at Tiffany's?

[B]

Hepburn.

[C]

Name John Travolta's character in Siren Fever.

[B]

I love the way you dance, Tony. Shit. Huh?

[C]

Good. Dude.

[B]

I know a couple of the ones I got wrong.

[C]

Let me count. How many? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7. 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14. Right. 14. That was amazing. Here's some of the ones you got wrong. The longest river in the world is the Amazon.

[B]

Z. Amazon.

[C]

Amazon. The Renaissance artist.

[B]

Leonardo Di.

[C]

Raphael.

[B]

Raphael.

[C]

What book holds the record for the fastest selling book in history?

[B]

How do like the Dale Carnegie book.

[C]

Harry Potter. What is the world's most populated city?

[B]

Is it India?

[C]

Jakarta.

[B]

Jakarta. Oh, that's Indonesia.

[C]

Indonesia. Who is the ancient Greek God of the sun?

[B]

Apollo.

[C]

Helios. Which US military branch uses slogan? It's not.

[B]

It's the army.

[C]

It's the Navy.

[B]

It's the Navy. Yeah. Shit.

[C]

What fast food. You got this one. That was pretty good.

[B]

Was fast.

[C]

You want the last one? Yeah. What fast food restaurant slogan was have it your way Burger King.

[B]

Real quick. Just because we got him. Whatever. Did Patrick Ewing.

[C]

33.

[B]

Only two other people produced. Produced a season of SNL.

[C]

Gene Doumanian.

[B]

Amazing. He replaced John Starks as a starting two guard. He left the Pistons.

[C]

Oh. Alan Houston.

[B]

Yes. He was Al Franken's writing partner.

[C]

Tom Davis.

[B]

Last one. Several father son duos have played for the Knicks. Name one that is not. The Brunsons.

[C]

Lenny Wilkins. Gerald Wilkins.

[B]

Kiki and Ernie Vanderbilt.

[C]

Oh, wow.

[B]

Allie McGuire. Wow. The Bibby boys.

[C]

The Bibbys.

[B]

Wow.

[C]

That's awesome. Adam Pally, thank you so much.

[B]

You crushed this.

[C]

My pleasure. Thank you.

[B]

Do you want to fly in the presente so everyone gets a little something nice when. When they. When they come on here. You really. I gotta say, we'll go back and we'll crunch the numbers. Officially. Yeah. You have definitely done better than anyone has done. Whoa. Hold your head up high.

[C]

I will.

[B]

And for this we got you a little something because we know how much you love the New York Knicks. So this is. Show it. This is a Jalen Brunson jersey. What did you. Did you.

[C]

Is this realized?

[B]

And it's signed. Couldn't get Jalen, so I signed it. But I think that that is like very special because people you'll be at Madison Square Garden and people are gonna go, oh, Brunson got that. My son's gotta sign one. You're gonna go, no, no. This is signed by Ike Barinholtz. And they're gonna go, who the fuck are you talking about? They're gonna say, my co star from the Mindy Project. And they're just gonna say what's the Mindy Project? And just say to that person, check out Funny youy Ask. It's available wherever you listen to your podcast or subscribe on YouTube.

[C]

This is really special.

[B]

Thank you, Adam Pally, ladies and gentlemen.

[C]

There's no way you could have gotten Brunson to sign it at all.

[B]

Well, it was. It was.

[C]

It's okay. Whatever. It's fine.

[B]

The difference in cost. The difference in cost. The difference in cost.