Giggling about brain surgeons, the bachelor, and being young

Summary

Giggly Squad – Episode Summary: "Giggling about Brain Surgeons, The Bachelor, and Being Young"

Release Date: February 18, 2025
Hosts: Hannah Berner & Paige DeSorbo

---

Introduction

In this lively episode of Giggly Squad, hosts Hannah Berner and Paige DeSorbo dive into a myriad of humorous and heartfelt topics, including their adventures in Hollywood, Florida, encounters with brain surgeons, participation in The Bachelor, and reflections on their youth. As always, the duo keeps listeners entertained with their candid conversations, personal anecdotes, and comedic banter.

---

Adventures in Hollywood, Florida

The episode kicks off with Hannah and Paige recounting their recent trip to Hollywood, Florida. They share amusing stories about navigating the city, including a memorable taxi ride that set the tone for their escapades.

• Taxi Shenanigans:
  Paige (00:02): "Like, I feel like you should be able to get cars the way you shop online..."

• Vintage Hotel Memories:
  Paige (03:02): "Can I tell you the last time I was at this exact hotel? I've stayed at this hotel before. I was 17 years old."

• Meeting Locals:
  Their interactions with locals reveal cultural misunderstandings and humorous exchanges, highlighting the charm and quirks of Florida’s historical towns.

---

Encounters with Brain Surgeons and Dating Stories

A significant portion of the episode revolves around Hannah and Paige’s encounter with Christian, a neurologist they met during their tour. Their interaction with him becomes a focal point for discussing the knowledge women have about their own bodies versus what medical professionals might overlook.

• Meeting Christian the Neurologist:
  Paige (10:55): "I'm gonna be honest. When he first said it, my first thought in my head was, wait, what the is that again?"

• Lack of Female Anatomical Knowledge:
  Unknown Guest (12:09): "He didn't know about periods, and they don't know about..."

• Humorous Take on Medical Expertise:
  Paige (13:02): "And they don't know about it. They don't know about periods, and they don't know about."

Through these interactions, the hosts humorously critique the gaps in medical professionals' understanding of female health, emphasizing the need for better education and awareness.

---

Managing Anxiety with Beta Blockers

Hannah and Paige open up about their struggles with anxiety, particularly during their demanding tour schedule. They discuss the use of beta blockers as a coping mechanism and share personal insights into managing mental health.

• Using Beta Blockers for Anxiety:
  Paige (14:53): "What are you running home and DMing everyone that we've met? Yeah, I didn't."

• Self-Induced Anxiety:
  Paige (14:57): "Here's the thing about my beta blockers and like, my anxiety in general. I knew that my anxiety was so self-induced, and I definitely needed beta blockers throughout this whole tour."

• Realizations About Mental Health:
  Unknown Guest (16:23): "We've all been in points in our life where something's consuming us."

The conversation highlights the importance of acknowledging anxiety triggers and the role that beta blockers play in their daily lives, offering listeners relatable content on mental health management.

---

Experiences at the Michael Kors Fashion Show

Hannah and Paige attend a Michael Kors fashion show, where they navigate the high-pressure environment of fashion events. Their stories from the show reveal the intricacies of fashion hierarchies, interactions with marketing personnel, and unexpected celebrity encounters.

• Navigating the Fashion Show:
  Paige (21:24): "First of all, they put, like, all the influencers in, like, one section."

• Interactions with Marketing Staff:
  Unknown Guest (22:06): "I love your outfit. You look so."

• Celebrity Encounters:
  Unknown Guest (27:07): "But then earlier, someone was trying to talk to Rachel Zegler."

Their experiences underscore the challenges of maintaining authenticity and composure amidst the glamour and expectations of high-profile fashion events.

---

Participation in The Bachelor

The hosts share their humorous and somewhat awkward experiences participating in The Bachelor, offering a behind-the-scenes look at reality TV from their unique comedic perspective.

• Dating on The Bachelor:
  Unknown Guest (51:15): "I was wearing a vintage Moschino suit. Shout out, Tabitha."

• Navigating Reality TV Dynamics:
  Unknown Guest (53:07): "I was in the points in our life where something's consuming us."

• Reflecting on The Bachelor Experience:
  Unknown Guest (55:50): "I watched the Bachelor, like, in college, I was so into the Bachelor, I actually had to take a break from it."

Their anecdotes shed light on the absurdities and pressures of reality dating shows, all while keeping the tone light and entertaining.

---

High School Memories and Social Dynamics

Hannah and Paige delve into nostalgic memories from their high school days, discussing social dynamics, friendships, and the challenges of adolescence. Their stories paint a vivid picture of their formative years, filled with relatable struggles and humorous mishaps.

• All-Girls School Experiences:
  Paige (57:19): "I would go to Victoria's Secret and whatever new tote they had. That was my backpack."

• Dealing with Bullies and Social Expectations:
  Unknown Guest (58:57): "I was Mrs. Like, you were allowed to just leave."

• Humorous Take on High School Life:
  Unknown Guest (59:00): "I did, I had a Beth memory."

These reflections offer listeners a blend of humor and empathy, highlighting the universal challenges of high school life.

---

Closing Thoughts and Future Plans

As the episode winds down, Hannah and Paige reflect on their ongoing tour, upcoming shows in cities like Salt Lake City and Las Vegas, and their plans post-tour. They also emphasize the importance of their friendship and the support they provide each other through the chaos of their professional and personal lives.

• Looking Ahead:
  Unknown Guest (67:14): "And we've been cut off today. That's all we can leave you with."

• Upcoming Shows:
  Paige (67:31): "And we have shows in two weeks. Our last leg of the tour in Salt Lake City, Tacoma, Tacoma, Vegas. Vegas."

Their closing remarks reinforce the central theme of the podcast: navigating life’s ups and downs with laughter and camaraderie.

---

Conclusion

In "Giggling about Brain Surgeons, The Bachelor, and Being Young," Giggly Squad delivers a mix of humor, personal storytelling, and insightful commentary on various aspects of modern life. Hannah and Paige’s ability to blend laughter with genuine reflections makes this episode both entertaining and relatable for listeners who enjoy candid conversations peppered with wit and wisdom.

---

Notable Quotes:

• Paige DeSorbo (10:55): "I'm gonna be honest. When he first said it, my first thought in my head was, wait, what the is that again?"

• Unknown Guest (12:09): "He didn't know about periods, and they don't know about..."

• Paige DeSorbo (14:57): "Here's the thing about my beta blockers and like, my anxiety in general. I knew that my anxiety was so self-induced, and I definitely needed beta blockers throughout this whole tour."

• Unknown Guest (21:24): "First of all, they put, like, all the influencers in, like, one section."

• Unknown Guest (51:15): "I was wearing a vintage Moschino suit. Shout out, Tabitha."

• Unknown Guest (57:19): "I would go to Victoria's Secret and whatever new tote they had. That was my backpack."

• Unknown Guest (67:14): "And we've been cut off today. That's all we can leave you with."

These quotes encapsulate the hosts' humor, candidness, and the diverse range of topics covered in the episode.

Transcript

[Paige Desorbo]

If there's one thing that is my.

[Hannah Berner]

Vibe, it's shopping from my bed.

[Paige Desorbo]

Like, I feel like you should be able to get cars the way you shop online. It should be like buying a new couch, just like a couple clicks and then it arrives. Well, now you really can do that because Cars.com has over 2 million options to pick from with up to 50,000 new options added on a daily basis. So whatever direction life takes you next and whoever you're looking to be, there's a car for [e-mail] personally, I want to be one of those girls that like drives around with the top down and is like singing Taylor Swift songs. And I feel like Cars.com has so much to do with that. Picturing myself in a convertible just really works for me. So find your Next possibility on cars.com where to next?

[Hannah Berner]

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[Gary]

Sup, gigglers? Gary, fix your wi fi Manifest that we can't be managed. I mean, the day just got away from me.

[Unknown]

What is up my St. Augustine gigglers?

[Paige Desorbo]

Well, we're in Hollywood, Florida. True.

[Unknown]

I have to say we didn't know where St. Augustine was. It's in Florida. Very cute town.

[Paige Desorbo]

Cute.

[Unknown]

Cute.

[Paige Desorbo]

So cute.

[Unknown]

Whenever we're not in New York, if we see anything, like I'll literally see a stop sign, I'll be like, okay, cute.

[Paige Desorbo]

I feel like when we're not in New York and we see that people live in a different place, we're like, this is so cute. Cute for them.

[Unknown]

I just want to formally apologize to the Academy because I feel like I said something somewhere about like where the. Is St. Augustine? Do I still know? No, but it's really a historical cute town with great brunch.

[Paige Desorbo]

And I think it's close to the Daytona 500.

[Unknown]

Really?

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah, I think Daytona was, like, right there.

[Unknown]

Oh. It's funny because we got in the cab and the taxi driver was so excited that we were like, we got in the Uber.

[Paige Desorbo]

They don't have taxis.

[Unknown]

Sorry. I live in the 1600.

[Paige Desorbo]

We've gotten a horse and carriage.

[Unknown]

He was like, what are you here for? And, like, we retired, so we didn't say anything. We were like, to visit.

[Paige Desorbo]

Well, also, when it's, like, a man, we're not gonna go into, like, we have a podcast, and then he's, like, giggly, turns it on, and we talk about our. So we're just like.

[Unknown]

It's a whole thing.

[Paige Desorbo]

We're like. We're just here for a girls trip.

[Unknown]

And he was so excited to tell us all the places we can go. But anyway, we're in the middle of fucking tour right now. Like, literally in bed at the Hard Rock Hotel, looking onto a pool.

[Paige Desorbo]

Can I tell you the last time I was at this exact hotel? I've stayed at this hotel before.

[Unknown]

Oh, my God.

[Paige Desorbo]

I was 17 years old.

[Unknown]

Thriving your peak?

[Paige Desorbo]

I was peaking.

[Unknown]

Okay.

[Paige Desorbo]

I was literally peaking. I was with four of my girlfriends. We all brought fake IDs.

[Unknown]

No parents?

[Paige Desorbo]

No. My friend's dad came with us.

[Unknown]

There's always that one parent that's like.

[Paige Desorbo]

I actually can't believe my mom even let me go on this trip. Especially with someone's dad.

[Unknown]

Yeah. Dads don't even know, like.

[Paige Desorbo]

No, he didn't know where we were.

[Unknown]

He didn't know your name?

[Paige Desorbo]

No, he didn't. He didn't know where we were the entire time. Had these fake IDs.

[Unknown]

He was asleep. Say, dads are always asleep.

[Paige Desorbo]

He was asleep.

[Unknown]

I've never met a dad that was awake.

[Paige Desorbo]

We go to this. What the hell is the name of that restaurant? It's like this crazy Italian restaurant where they literally. No. Where they play Italian while you're at the restaurant. Oh, no. It's like a famous. I have to look it up because it's gonna drive me nuts. We go to this restaurant, right? Obviously, there's, like, Italian waiters, and we're just, like, loving it. Okay. We meet these two guys.

[Unknown]

They went all the way to Florida to see Italians. That's a crazy.

[Paige Desorbo]

There's none in Albany. Literally. I couldn't find one in Albany. We're at this restaurant, we start chatting up our waiters. We give them our fake IDs, right? Because we want them to serve us alcohol after we're done with dinner. They're like, we will go out with you guys. They think we're 26, okay? These men think we're 26. Six years old. I was 17.

[Unknown]

We're like, I think you're divorced, young moms.

[Paige Desorbo]

I had a whole backstory. I was a hairstylist as a hair freaking stylist. I think it was like, one of my brother's girlfriends. I was like, if you want to date my brother, you have to give me your fake id.

[Unknown]

You would love being a hairstylist because you love gossip.

[Paige Desorbo]

I'd be such a good hairstylist. We go out with these men, okay? We go to, like a club, whatever.

[Unknown]

Do they have, like Italian accents or. They're just guidos.

[Paige Desorbo]

They were just like, guidos, Okay. I don't even know where they were from. I don't.

[Unknown]

Puerto Rican?

[Paige Desorbo]

No. Like, I don't know where. I don't even remember what their names were, actually. No. One of the guys names was John.

[Unknown]

Okay.

[Paige Desorbo]

I think whatever. We go out with these men one night, next night, obviously, they're like, let's go out again. We had so much fun. We go out with them again. It gets to that point where it's like, oh, are you going to come, like, home with me? And I start freaking out and I go, we can't come back to your apartment because we're 17.

[Unknown]

You were the one that cracked.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah, I cracked. You cracked? I cracked.

[Unknown]

You're a snitch.

[Paige Desorbo]

I'm a snitch. These men looked at us and they go, what? And I go, I'm so sorry, but we had a great time and now we have to run away. And we ran away.

[Unknown]

We were just here for dancing.

[Paige Desorbo]

I mean, obviously I was not gonna let these men, like, have sex with us because that would be, like, illegal on my part.

[Unknown]

I feel like there's illegal stuff happening everywhere.

[Paige Desorbo]

Everywhere.

[Unknown]

You were having good conversation up until that point.

[Paige Desorbo]

Great conversation. Then I was like, I haven't. I haven't gotten into college yet. I'm actually waiting on a couple.

[Unknown]

Acceptance. Don't let. I'm gonna get into college.

[Paige Desorbo]

This is a really dark time for me, actually. All my friends are going to college and I'm not. I remember my other girlfriends being like, we could have just not ever told them. I was like, they had a right to know. They had a right to know.

[Unknown]

Oh, now you're playing the hero.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah. So Anyway, that was my experience in Hollywood, Florida, at the Hard Rock Casino.

[Unknown]

And that's. Yeah, that's amazing.

[Paige Desorbo]

And that, I feel like, sums up Florida, where it's like, I didn't know she was 17.

[Unknown]

Did you have to say we got, like, eight Amber alerts on our phones on the way? Yeah.

[Paige Desorbo]

What was up with that?

[Unknown]

It's Florida. It's Florida. Also, Florida's banning books.

[Paige Desorbo]

Are they?

[Unknown]

Well, I don't Just Florida. Did you see Julia Moore just posted her book that's about, like, having. It's a children's book about having freckles and how it's okay to be different. Got banned by the government in all of America, I think books are being banned. So all we have is podcast now. All we have is us, which means it's going downhill. Quick side note about Florida. We were so excited for our Izzy Trash segment because we were like, we're gonna get some prime time Florida garbage.

[Paige Desorbo]

Like, in the Midwest. I'm like, oh, Izzy Trash probably isn't gonna be as explosive because, like, these guys are nice. And so, like, I wait to go to Florida. I'm like, florida. I'm like, we're gonna get some real idiots.

[Unknown]

And you know what? I always listen to my intuition when it's my job to pick the guy on stage. And what happened in Florida is I got too excited.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

Because the first guy I looked at had a man bun. So I was like, the talent here is just incredible, overwhelming. And I should have gone with my gut and just gone with him. But I said, I got greedy. I said, I want to see more, so I'm going to crowd. I literally got greedy. I was like, you motherfucker, you. What the fuck? Is that a hat? Why are you wearing your sunglasses on top of your hat? What's going on?

[Paige Desorbo]

And then you happened upon a mullet, man. And you don't just look past a man with a mullet in Florida.

[Unknown]

No. There. And I was just like, I. I was between the two, and I said, we're going with the mullet. Okay. Because in my head, honestly, between me and you, it was a win. Win. Either one was going to be a slam dunk for us. And the man, he's holding, like, a huge beer can. He's wearing, like, a white shirt, jeans. Looks like our. We were in northern Florida, which is kind of the south. So he was kind of wearing cowboy boots. Like, I was like, this is a win.

[Paige Desorbo]

Oh, he was wearing, like, northern. I've never thought of this Northern Florida.

[Unknown]

They're like, southern they're, like, touching.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

Georgia.

[Paige Desorbo]

Each other's cousins.

[Unknown]

Page just.

[Paige Desorbo]

Sorry.

[Unknown]

Page just sorry. She didn't mean that. But she still doesn't think there's air conditioning in Oklahoma City, so you guys can message her about that separately. And I didn't say it. She did. Literally, that's how It's Oklahoma City. They go, we have to talk to Paige. Anyway, so the guy comes on stage, and I'm like. Literally. I was, like, licking my lips. I was like, I'm about to rip this man a new asshole. And his name was Christian, which I thought was weird. That was also a red flag. I thought it was going to be something. The Christian sounds too smart.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah. It sounds like it sounds Connecticut.

[Unknown]

Yes, exactly. Christian.

[Paige Desorbo]

I wanted, like. I wanted, like, Ben or like, a Dirk.

[Unknown]

Yes.

[Paige Desorbo]

You know, like something like. Yeah. Something where you're like. I don't know.

[Unknown]

Or something really weird, like a Gerald. Like that. Like, because their great grandpa.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

I don't know. It's just Christian was very. Throw me off.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah. So we were already, like, okay.

[Unknown]

Unsure. And then he was speaking, and he didn't have, like, a. Any accent.

[Paige Desorbo]

No. No twang.

[Unknown]

No twang. And I don't even know what northern Florida twang is, but there's something.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

And then I go, okay, let's start this off easy. What do you do for a living?

[Paige Desorbo]

And this man was a neurologist.

[Unknown]

We can't even spell neurologists.

[Paige Desorbo]

I'm gonna be honest. When he first said it, my first thought in my head was, wait, what the is that again?

[Unknown]

And I thought he said urologist, but you reacted to it. And I was like, there's no way she knows what a urologist is.

[Paige Desorbo]

I've gone to many a urologist. Don't you dare bring up my UTIs. I've seen a thousand urologists. No. And then I was like, oh, my God. This guy's a fucking brain surgeon.

[Unknown]

A brain surgeon. So we immediately are nervous. And then he used the word obliged on stage, like, get that out of here.

[Paige Desorbo]

Shut up.

[Unknown]

So now I'm realizing we're being outsmarted on our own stage.

[Paige Desorbo]

Let's also point this out. His girlfriend that was in the crowd, obviously the reason he was there, also a neurologist, so just too smarty pants.

[Unknown]

He's like, we met in med school. And I go, this is what the fuck is going on right now? My head's starting to get hot. It's all backfiring. Wearing my face. And then I was like, where are you from? And he goes, california. I said, how dare you culturally appropriate Florida culture and dress like this? Look like you punch walls if, like, you watch your kid lose in a, in a flag football game.

[Paige Desorbo]

You did make a really good point, though, when you're like, I don't know how I feel about my doctor walking into the room and having a mullet.

[Unknown]

No. Immediately I'd be worried. Also, I'm like, this guy likes to. Okay, not to throw him under the bus because I. We said his name and I don't want him to get fired. But we did ask him how a girl pees with a tampon in, and he said, take it out.

[Paige Desorbo]

He didn't know.

[Unknown]

He didn't know.

[Paige Desorbo]

He didn't know. And we're not saying we're smarter than doctors.

[Unknown]

We're just saying doctors do not study women. Even brain surgeons, you know, brain surgeons can't find your clit.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah. Even a put it on a T shirt. Even brain surgeons can't find the clip. That's crazy. How do you not know that?

[Unknown]

No, like, if you're a surgeon, don't you have to go through, like, medical school?

[Paige Desorbo]

I mean, you would think that you'd have to. At some point in the first year of medical school, you'd have to study the entire body. Just like a little.

[Unknown]

Just a little do study the entire body. They just study male bodies. Period.

[Paige Desorbo]

Period.

[Unknown]

Period. No pun intended.

[Paige Desorbo]

And they don't know about it. They don't know about periods, and they don't know about.

[Unknown]

No.

[Paige Desorbo]

That's actually so crazy.

[Unknown]

I know. Everyone was worried. Everyone was scared. I was scared.

[Hannah Berner]

I was scared.

[Unknown]

But then we asked him if you could overdose on beta blockers. He said, yes. Which you didn't listen to.

[Paige Desorbo]

No, I did. And my doctor, my female doctor just said, don't take more than six. Okay? I said, at a time, can't promise anything. No, in a day. She. In a day. She was like, look, six is enough. But I actually have never taken more than two.

[Unknown]

Do you want to give the gigglers a beta blocka update?

[Paige Desorbo]

A beta blocka update.

[Unknown]

Sorry. We're so tired.

[Paige Desorbo]

We're delusional.

[Unknown]

Okay. Every time.

[Paige Desorbo]

Grace, if you're listening, which I know, I hope you are, because it is your job. Every time we talk about beta bloggers, please put in a. Yeah, please put in some type of sound. Okay, here's the thing about my beta blockers and like, my anxiety in general. I knew that my anxiety was so self induced, and I definitely needed beta blockers throughout this whole tour.

[Unknown]

What do you mean? Self induced.

[Paige Desorbo]

Like, I was putting my anxiety. I was doing it to myself.

[Unknown]

Okay, you're sounding like your mom right now. Like, paige, stop. It's not your fault.

[Paige Desorbo]

You're like, right, no, obviously it's you.

[Unknown]

Having it, but it's not self induced.

[Paige Desorbo]

No, Like, I was putting myself in situations that, like, in my body, it was like, don't do that. And I was like, no, I'm going to do it. And then I was getting anxiety.

[Unknown]

Okay. Yeah. You were not in alignment.

[Paige Desorbo]

I was not aligned.

[Unknown]

Okay. But I just don't want you to be mean to yourself because that also. Anyway, thank you.

[Paige Desorbo]

Thank you.

[Unknown]

So I listen to one Mel Robbins pod. Continue.

[Paige Desorbo]

So I took up a blocker for Radio City because Radio City was just like. That was like crazy. And I was like, so nervous for that. But this tour, this, like, leg of the tour, I have forgotten to take my beta blocker. Like, we'll literally be about to go out on stage and I'm like, oh, my God, I didn't take my beta blocker. And then I'll run back, take it. But, like, I don't need them anymore.

[Unknown]

And that's on healing. Because you know when something is, like, consuming your brain so much, I honestly feel like you would. The whole day you'd be like, okay, I'll take my beta blocker. When is the beta blocker? December. Everything was about the beta blocker. You know when you feel in your life, you're like, my life will always.

[Paige Desorbo]

Be about 20 beta blockers. But what if I need all of them?

[Unknown]

Yes.

[Paige Desorbo]

Feel like I need to get more beta blockers.

[Unknown]

We've all been in points in our life where something's consuming us. And then you're like, how could I live without it? And then one day you wake up, like, and it's not even a topic, and it's not even a thing, and it's not even you getting over something. It's like you don't even care anymore.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah. And that's anymore so literally silly.

[Unknown]

On stage, we were taking photos because we take photos before we go on stage. And you, you run to the green room. And I'm like, oh, no, what's going on? So I go over, I think you're like, having a freak out or something. And you just go, I forgot to take my beta blocker. And I. I couldn't have been happier. And again, if next week you have to take it again.

[Paige Desorbo]

Right?

[Unknown]

That's okay. I.

[Paige Desorbo]

Here's what I've been taking them for.

[Hannah Berner]

Social situations.

[Unknown]

Oh, so we've created just a new problem.

[Paige Desorbo]

Like, I had to go to a party and I was like, oh, and I'll take my beta blocker. Did it help that? Yeah, yeah, it did.

[Unknown]

Just keeping it chill.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah. Just keeping my heart rate at a steady pace.

[Unknown]

I took my beta blocker for the roast and I took one for my Netflix special.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

And it was helpful. So, yeah, you've been great on stage. Silly, goosey, funny.

[Paige Desorbo]

I've been in my silly. I've been silly wild.

[Unknown]

Well, the crowds have been fucking amazing, and we only have one more leg of the tour left.

[Paige Desorbo]

I know it's sad, but I'm excited.

[Unknown]

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[Paige Desorbo]

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[Hannah Berner]

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[Unknown]

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[Gary]

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[Unknown]

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[Paige Desorbo]

Wait, let's go back a little bit.

[Unknown]

Because we had a crazy week last week.

[Paige Desorbo]

We had a crazy week last week. Let's talk about the Michael Kors Show. First of all.

[Unknown]

You get so nervous.

[Paige Desorbo]

I get so nervous when you come to fashion events, because I know I've.

[Unknown]

Only been to two.

[Paige Desorbo]

You're nervous. And then it makes me nervous.

[Unknown]

It's just an unfamiliar. Like, I don't understand the hierarchy. I don't understand all the codes going on. I'm just. I'm here to have a good time. Yeah. But there's so much history and stuff going on, and Paige is looking at me like, don't you fucking embarrass me in front of my cool fashion friends. Okay.

[Paige Desorbo]

So much to talk about at the Michael Kors show, but I need to start with this. So, Hannah. So, like, they put, like, all the influencers in, like, one section. Everyone does, like, small talk, and it's like, oh, my God, you look so good. No, you look so good. It's like, wait, you.

[Unknown]

I love your outfit. You look so.

[Paige Desorbo]

And I usually just sit in. Like, when I get to my, like, where they show me where I'm sitting, I usually sit in my seat, and I don't move, like. And I don't. Because I'm like, ner. I'm not gonna get up and, like, annoy someone.

[Unknown]

You're not a social butterfly.

[Paige Desorbo]

I'm not a social.

[Unknown]

You're a social larva.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

You're curled up in a corner.

[Paige Desorbo]

If you want to socialize with me, you got to come to me, and you got to sit next to me.

[Unknown]

And you're fine as long as people come to you and sit down almost like a cat. Smell my finger. My hand first.

[Paige Desorbo]

And then we'll chat, and then we'll chat. I can't get. I'm not getting up and going out of my way to, like, go over to someone else. That's not my personality.

[Unknown]

So bad, because I only went to one fashion show this week, and it was Michael Kors, and I was running late. Like, my only job was to get there on time, and I was yapping it up with my hair and makeup.

[Paige Desorbo]

Fashion shows never start on time.

[Unknown]

I googled the fashion shows start on time. And they go, yes, they always start on time. And I was like, I'm texting the Michael Kors people, and I'm like, tell.

[Paige Desorbo]

Michael if they tell you, if the invite says, be there by 11, the show's not starting till 11:30.

[Unknown]

Okay.

[Paige Desorbo]

There's just no one.

[Unknown]

I was freaking out because I knew that you were there without me.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah. I mean, I'm punctual, so I got there at 11, but it's. I actually was the first person in line, which was so embarrassing. But anyway, that's my nightmare. It was my nightmare, actually. This was crazy. I was at the Michael Kors show, and, like, it's. The girlies are doing the PR and who's going in and who's got. Blah, blah, blah, blah. So, like, it's not like. It's like grown adult women. Do you know what I mean? Like, it's the girls.

[Unknown]

We are adults.

[Paige Desorbo]

No. Oh, yeah.

[Unknown]

I guess we forget.

[Paige Desorbo]

I mean, it's not women that are older than us.

[Unknown]

It's. It's the marketing girlies.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah, it's the marketing girlies. So, like, when I go up to the line, I'm like, what's up, girls? You know, like, it's like, I'm not nervous for that part. And so I was the first person in line, and she was like, sorry, like, we're not letting anyone in yet. Like, we're still, like, met. And I was like, literally, keep me out here all day. Like, I don't give a. You do what you have to do. This older woman, I would say. I would say 40, late 40s, maybe early 50s, maybe mid-40s. Who knows? I know she was, like, older than me. And the marketing girl is. She comes up and she goes, you're not letting anyone in yet. And this girl is so nice. She's like, sorry, no. Like, we, like, still have to do, like, a few things inside. But, like, if you stand over in this line. And the lady goes, I'm not standing in this line. And I go, oh. Because the last thing you're gonna do is be rude to the girl that I just met.

[Unknown]

Because now we go way back.

[Paige Desorbo]

Now we now this, okay? And she's trying to do her job, and the last thing you're going to do is come up here and yell at her for doing her job.

[Unknown]

Also, it's crazy because there's, like, insane celebrities there. Like. Like Kerry Washington insane celebrities.

[Paige Desorbo]

And this lady goes, so you don't have a different line for media? And the. And the girl was like, no, we don't. Like, basically, like, no, get in the line. And I was so offended for her. And I literally looked at the marketing girl, and I was like, oh, my God, I'm so sorry. Like, that was so rude of that woman. And she was. And the marketing girl was like, oh, yeah, they do that all the time. Like, I. It didn't phase me kind of thing.

[Unknown]

Yeah, that's when you know you've been in fashion for a minute when that.

[Paige Desorbo]

Stuff doesn't she was like, oh, as long as she didn't punch me in the face, I'm literally fin. And I was like, okay. So I was offended walking in for my friend that I don't know who it was. I'm like, the girl outside, give her a raise. Plus, it's also, like, freezing. Everyone's freezing. Like, you're gonna get inside. These girls have to wait outside till everyone gets in. Like, yeah. Also, like, chill the out.

[Unknown]

Like, I just want people to know I stand with the girl up front. I stand in solidarity with her. I don't know her name, but I respect her, and I believe she should be treated with kindness.

[Paige Desorbo]

No. She's literally trying to make a career for herself, and she doesn't need this mom yelling at her.

[Unknown]

I walked in exact opposite energy to the other spectrum, where I was just apologizing to everyone, and they were like, why are you apologizing? I'm like, I'm so. I thought the whole show was waiting for me. I thought Michael was holding it up for me. So anyway, you walk in.

[Paige Desorbo]

So I walk in. I get my seat. I take my pictures. I'm sitting there. I'm waiting for you. Everyone starts coming in. Hannah gets there. Now, if I have an eye on Hannah and I know who she's talking to, I feel better about it. Okay. Once I lose her in the crowd.

[Unknown]

I'm like, also, I do shine in those. Like, I love a social butterfly. Like, I'm a social butterfly. Yapping, yapping, yapping. Oh, hi. Oh, hi.

[Paige Desorbo]

Someone's taking pictures. You're yelling to them while they're taking their pictures. You're making them laugh. I'm like, it's not a talent show.

[Unknown]

No. When I come to a party, I'm giving 100%.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yes.

[Unknown]

Also, Rachel Zegler was walking by.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yes.

[Unknown]

But again, this wasn't. Like, people weren't socializing. Like, everyone was sitting down at this point, and I yelped. Like, I barked at her.

[Paige Desorbo]

We're waiting for the show to start. Everyone, an announcement. Take your seats.

[Unknown]

And this is the thing. I felt like I was. I felt like I was in school again, where I was like, if I see my friend, I'm gonna say what's good? We were.

[Paige Desorbo]

We were literally the juniors. We were sitting in our section. And you saw a freshman that you knew walk by and you yelled to her.

[Unknown]

Exactly. And. Because that's the kind of human I am. Yeah, she got scared.

[Paige Desorbo]

Well, she's with four bodyguards.

[Unknown]

She did have four bodyguards. You literally grab my leg. I go because you go, you don't know Rachel Zegler. And I go, I literally talked to her for 20 minutes. And she looks at me, waves, because she's literally being escorted to her important seat. By the way, I DMs her after, which was ballsy, because I actually was afraid that she was like, okay, keep Hannah burner away from me and my teeth. So I go, by the way, I'm so sorry I barked at you at the Michael Kors show. And she was like, you literally barked at her.

[Paige Desorbo]

I was like.

[Unknown]

And someone's like, get your Chihuahua and back in its bag. And she was like, oh, my God, I love you. Because I just know she likes Giggly Squad. And I was sitting with you.

[Paige Desorbo]

No, it didn't work out. No. You were actually correct that my social anxiety took over in that moment.

[Unknown]

I was like, see, when I'm anxious, I talk more. Like, I get bigger. When you're anxious, you get smaller. So together. It's very, very funny. You're like that. I'm like the mom, and you're the toddler that's holding the leg of the mom. And you're like, she normally is actually quite outgoing, but she's having a day that's literally you at social events. And people will be like, paige is so. Is so quiet. And I go, you should see her when she gets comfortable.

[Paige Desorbo]

When we're home.

[Unknown]

When we're home.

[Paige Desorbo]

You should see her when we're at home.

[Unknown]

Also, speaking of toddlers, I'm not wearing pants right now.

[Paige Desorbo]

Walks in my room, immediately just takes off her pants. It literally looks like she. Tell me that she threw up.

[Unknown]

I go, can you wipe me?

[Paige Desorbo]

No.

[Unknown]

I'm wearing no pants. I'm wearing a long shirt, though. Let's just. I don't want people to think I'm also. I'm wearing full granny panties.

[Paige Desorbo]

So then.

[Unknown]

Oh, yeah.

[Paige Desorbo]

So then we're seeing people. We're seeing people. We're saying hi. Acquired style. Bridget and Danielle.

[Unknown]

Twinsies.

[Paige Desorbo]

Twins on Tick Tock Felong, I think is their last name.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Paige Desorbo]

Gorgeous. Cute. Adorable. I think they're, like, 25. Maybe they're younger, like kids, but, like, you know, Hannah. Us grandmas. Hannah goes up to them now. I've never.

[Unknown]

It was a mutual.

[Paige Desorbo]

It was. We were standing in the same section.

[Unknown]

Yes.

[Paige Desorbo]

I've never met them in person, but, like, I've seen all of their TikToks, and I just think they're so freaking cute. I'm, like, always commenting on their stuff like, you guys are adorable.

[Unknown]

The problem is you think you know people.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

And I feel like I had. I had met one of them before, but I was very warm, like, to the point where it seemed like we've.

[Paige Desorbo]

Well, when I meet girls that are. That I know are, like, younger than.

[Unknown]

Us and like you, I never think of age.

[Paige Desorbo]

See, I always do.

[Unknown]

See, in my head. First of all, I'm Gen Z, okay? They see me and they go, my Gen Z queen. I literally. Also, I'm ageless in my head.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah, that's actually probably good.

[Unknown]

Like, I walk around. I'm a soul.

[Paige Desorbo]

You.

[Unknown]

I'm a soul that you can take or leave.

[Paige Desorbo]

I like, when I meet girls that I know are younger than me, I'm like, you're younger than me. I have to protect. Protect you and be so overly nice to you. Because if I, Like, I know how I was when I was 25 and I would meet girls in their 30s, I'd be like, they know what they're doing. And they were like, whatever. So I would be anxious. So that's. So I do it for my younger self. It's really has nothing to do with them. It's for my own.

[Unknown]

You're projecting. Yeah, I do, though. But it's funny. I see them as just like other creatives in the field.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah. See, I see them as, like.

[Unknown]

I see them. I see them as being like, I know I look like I'm 27, but.

[Paige Desorbo]

I'm not your age. I know you think I'm your age, but I'm not.

[Unknown]

Like, no one said that.

[Paige Desorbo]

So Hannah says to them, can I ask you guys a question? And I go, oh, God. Like, it could be anything. It could. Literally being friends with you, that could be anything. I'm like, I can't wait to hear what you're saying.

[Unknown]

Very. I'm in, like, dad joke mode. I'm turning into my dad. Like, at the brunch place yesterday, I ordered a. Also, we're like. We're just tired. I order a BLT on sourdough bread. Think of the biggest sourdough loaf you've ever seen, ever. It was insane. And so they cut it, and they didn't even cut it in half. It's just, like, the biggest sandwich I've ever seen in my life. So the nice lady puts it down, and I look at her and I go. I give myself. I think I'm an actress. So I give the tone. I go, oh. I actually was expecting a bigger sandwich. She looked at me dead serious. I looked at her. Paige is like, hannah, stop it. She's embarrassed. So I'm literally a dad. And then later on, the girl was like, by the way, I like giggly squad. And I'm like, you could have told me instead of leaving me high and.

[Paige Desorbo]

Dry when I tried my dad joke. You could have acknowledged my dad joke.

[Unknown]

And by the way, I was at the point with the the girls at the Michael Kors show where, like, we had said hi to each other and then we were still talking and I felt pressure. I had to bring something more to the conversation, right? So I got creative.

[Paige Desorbo]

So Hannah looks at these two girls and she goes, any chance you guys have ever watched the show Severance? And the girls are like, no. Like, one of them did was like, maybe we've seen like one episode, but like, no. And Hannah goes, okay, well, in the show, I'm like, oh, my fucking God. In the show, there's like an innie and an Audi and like, the innie has a real job. And I feel like that's you because you used to work in finance. And then I feel like the Audi is like you because you're a content. And I was just like, oh, my God, you.

[Unknown]

You're an innie and you're the Audi. And then one of them started laughing. The other one was like, what is she talking about? Did she just call me a belly button? And then I was like, and I have to go back to my seat.

[Paige Desorbo]

And it was great chatting with you. Have a great show.

[Unknown]

And I did do a follow up dm, by the way. And I said, hey, I hope you watch Severance. It's a really.

[Paige Desorbo]

What are you running home and dming everyone that we've met? Yeah, I didn't.

[Unknown]

I have anxiety too.

[Paige Desorbo]

Okay.

[Unknown]

I remember all the people that I feel like I made uncomfortable.

[Paige Desorbo]

That's why I say qu it in the moment. Because I'm like, I can't, I can't. What do you think?

[Unknown]

I have in my notes app all the people I need to DM to make sure that they don't hate me. Because I tried. Because this is my thing. I'm trying to get a laugh.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

And the laugh one, is risky, and two, it's not always appropriate for the environment you're in.

[Paige Desorbo]

Right.

[Unknown]

And when I'm constantly on the road doing stand up, like, I. I just. You have to be riffing all day, so it's hard to sometimes get yourself out of that mode of like, trying to make people laugh, which can be super annoying. Like, some comics are just always clowns. And you're like, he hey, not the time to like work your material out on me. Like, we're at a usps.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

Even like when we were flying and the pilot walked by like so bad, I wanted to call him a zaddy. And I was like, this is not a stand up show. This is a man just trying to do his job. You don't need a.

[Paige Desorbo]

The sexual harassment nobody talks about. Like when you're getting off a plane and the pilot comes out and he stands there and he says bye to everyone. A sexual undertone.

[Unknown]

Because you like that.

[Paige Desorbo]

Do you see how I landed that big thing?

[Unknown]

He goes, is that smooth ride for you?

[Paige Desorbo]

No, there's a sexual undertone of the pilot saying, have a good day.

[Unknown]

See you next time, babe. Come back for more later.

[Paige Desorbo]

But then I've been to your friends about it. Wasn't it? This is a big plane.

[Unknown]

Wasn't it big? Right. You didn't think it was me that good. Right? But it was. See my. I've been joking on stage about female pilots still. Even though the female pilot community is mad at me, how if I was there, I'd just be like, are you guys mad at me? Sorry, sorry, my bad. Please come back. Is energy weird? Okay. Thank you.

[Paige Desorbo]

Come over the loudspeaker. You're just like, are you guys okay?

[Unknown]

I do have to say one thing about social situations, though, that has made me feel better. Everyone feels like they made an ass of themselves in some way.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

So what I realized when they leave, they probably thought that they were. Could have been or if they didn't. But, like, everyone is insecure, worried about their own.

[Paige Desorbo]

I used to be really insecure going to like, workout classes or like to the gym.

[Unknown]

I actually still am because I'd be.

[Paige Desorbo]

Like, everyone's looking at me and knows I don't know what the I'm doing. And then I realized everyone's thinking that in their own head about themselves.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Paige Desorbo]

And so it's like, actually, no one's thinking about you.

[Unknown]

I actually, I get. But funny is I actually know what to do at the gym.

[Paige Desorbo]

Oh.

[Unknown]

Like, no. Like, I literally like, yeah, like professional trainers.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

Like, you're an Asian one School telling me how to do everything. It's more like I get very overstimulated by everything around me to the point that I'm like, I can't handle this and I need to be, like, alone.

[Paige Desorbo]

But that's why I love Pilates.

[Unknown]

We. I have been in my Pilates era.

[Paige Desorbo]

We're Pilates girls.

[Unknown]

We.

[Paige Desorbo]

We're gonna make Pilates socks We really think, you guys.

[Unknown]

If you. If you were like, what is the workout? I should do one. Because you could lie down during it.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah, I love when they switch it up and they're like, okay, let's take a stretch now. I'm like, yeah, for a minute.

[Unknown]

No, I. We love our Pilates.

[Paige Desorbo]

No, we love Pilates. Okay, wait. So then after Michael Kors, then the show's over. Then we're, like, going back to, like, take a picture with Michael.

[Unknown]

Oh, no, I blocked it out.

[Paige Desorbo]

I get snubbed by Michael. Yes. He hugged you this time.

[Unknown]

Well, because I came in. No, I came in with a handshake.

[Hannah Berner]

Oh, you did?

[Unknown]

I didn't even notice that.

Well, I was, like, overcompensating because of last time. I felt like he didn't see me for me, so I came in with the hand. But right before we were about to take a photo with him, one of the marketing girlies we were with was like, do you know Michael has a cat? Which he shouldn't have told me, because that was fresh in my brain.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

So the second I saw him, I said. I shook his head.

[Paige Desorbo]

He said, we love cats, too. I'm literally mid smile. I'm like, no, she didn't. I'm like, no, she did it. Do you want to know what Michael Kors says back? Nothing. Silence. He goes, I don't give a. If you guys like cats. Half the population likes cats. You freaks. Get out of my line.

[Unknown]

This is the thing. Sometimes you bring cats up to people and they're like, oh, my God, I need to show you every photo. My cat, whatever. I threw it out there wasn't caught.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah, if he wanted to take it, he could, but, you know, he didn't give anything.

[Unknown]

I have to say, though, but he wasn't rude about it.

[Paige Desorbo]

No, he wasn't.

[Unknown]

He was. Matter of fact. And he said thank you. No, he didn't say it.

[Paige Desorbo]

He didn't say anything.

[Unknown]

Thank you.

[Paige Desorbo]

He literally said nothing.

[Unknown]

I didn't even feel weird. I just felt like another time.

[Paige Desorbo]

You know what? We'll catch up about this later. Michael. Have a good night.

[Unknown]

Michael, if you're listening, he's not. To all the marketing girls at Michael's Kors listening, Let Michael know that we have cats, and if he wants to do some kind of cat thing with us, we are available.

[Paige Desorbo]

Wait.

[Unknown]

Shout out to the Michael Kors girls.

[Paige Desorbo]

Too, because I needed an outfit for the summer house premiere party, and I literally dropped the ball on it. I had nothing. And they sent me over the cutest little romper that they let me borrow. And they did it so quick.

[Unknown]

People were going nuts over my pantsuit by people. Kim desorbo sent me a text and said, hey, sweetie, you looked amazing in the Michael Kors outfit.

[Paige Desorbo]

She sent me a text too and said, hey, Paige, Hannah looks amazing.

[Unknown]

Did you get jealous?

[Paige Desorbo]

I was like, okay, what about me? I said, you birthed me. She said, paige, come on, you always look good. You know I always think you look good.

[Unknown]

Well, so I started a new era of wearing my hair slicked back, but keeping half up, half down because I think I look like a hard boiled egg if I go full slick.

[Paige Desorbo]

But how many times have I been saying, your hair looks so good pulled back and you wouldn't do it?

[Unknown]

Okay, Aaron Samuels.

[Paige Desorbo]

Okay, well, I'm just saying. I've been saying for years, you look good in a high pony.

[Unknown]

Why are you yelling? Like, literally yelling at me?

[Paige Desorbo]

I'm literally yelling.

[Unknown]

I'll tell you why. Because in middle school, you know, when kids say stuff that, like, they're not even trying to be funny, they're just.

[Paige Desorbo]

Stating they're a matter of fact.

[Unknown]

They're matter of fact. I wore my hair like that and some girl was like, you look like Legolas. And this was during Prime. Lord of the Rings. Is it Lord of the Rings?

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah, yeah.

[Unknown]

Lord of the Rings. Like Orlando Bloom. Yeah. Who, by the way, gorgeous, but not the look I was going for. So immediately I was like, and if I do that, I look like a killer elf and I don't want to do that.

[Paige Desorbo]

Right. But one kid was like, you have big ears.

[Unknown]

Yeah, they said I have elf ears. And they weren't joking. So then I've taken that with me. And you carried that. But I was super brave and I did it for the Michael Kors and.

[Paige Desorbo]

It looked so good.

[Unknown]

Everyone liked it. Shout out to Kat Thompson. She did my hair. She's amazing.

[Paige Desorbo]

No, you looked amazing at this.

[Unknown]

But then I tried to do it myself last night. We had a couple meltdowns. Just a few. I. Yeah, I'm working on it. I'm figuring it out. Then we had to go to the lactate show.

Yes.

[Paige Desorbo]

Which was so funny.

[Unknown]

This is what dreams are made of.

Hey.

[Paige Desorbo]

No, I love an intimate show.

[Unknown]

Oh, well, you know, comedy is meant to be in, like, a club environment. Shout out. If you weren't able to make the show, they have this lactate sweeps where you can go to their Instagram and they're sending out, like, lactaid merch and stuff.

[Paige Desorbo]

Oh, cute.

[Unknown]

So Check that out. I'm obsessed with lactate 1 because it's real milk, but just without the lactose. And as a woman in stem, I don't know how they do it, but they do it. So it's like you're not drinking weird made up stuff. Like, we like drinking real milk. I love real milk in this town.

[Paige Desorbo]

This town is big enough for the both of us. And a glass of milk.

[Hannah Berner]

Yes, it was Hannah's literal dream come true. It was a room full of dairy baddies coming together at the Lactate Dairy Lovers Lounge to celebrate real dairy, just without the lactose. And of course, we made it special.

[Paige Desorbo]

With a Club Giggly Show.

[Hannah Berner]

It was truly everything. But if you did miss out on it, you can still join the dairy baddies movement because lactate is giving away exclusive, exclusive event merch. We're talking dairy B sweatshirts, totes hats, and coupons for their delicious, creamy lactose free ice cream. Now until February 21st, head over to Lactaid on Instagram. Enter the Lactaid Dairy Baddies box sweepstakes by following the instructions on the official sweepstakes post and get yourself in the running so you can enjoy 100% real dairy without compromise. Check out all the details and official rules at the link in their bio.

[Unknown]

So lactate, we had so much fun. And I liked my outfit too.

[Paige Desorbo]

I was just gonna say I loved our outfits. Here's the thing about me and Hannah that I think people really don't get. Never in the history of our friendship have we ever said, hey, this is what I'm wearing tonight. And, like, sent a picture especially for Giggly Squad. We did an entire tour. We did not show each other one single outfit. We matched for every single show.

[Unknown]

And I know some people are like, oh, they look like they're going to different events. No, first of all, it's our event, so we made up the event. No, first of all, no. Because we're different aesthetics, same event. Look, I'm not fighting with this imaginary person.

[Paige Desorbo]

You're like, okay, so perfect example, Nashville, you wore a pink outfit. I wore pink and brown boots, period.

[Unknown]

But then you did buy a shirt from Instagram Shop that everyone's losing their mind over, which I did not see that for you.

[Paige Desorbo]

I didn't see it for me either. Yeah, sometimes I get. Sometimes Instagram Shop, like, look how millennial I am.

[Unknown]

They know us better than our own families.

[Paige Desorbo]

I love getting an ad for me that I'm like, yeah, thanks.

[Unknown]

Cut out the middleman. Why am I searching? Tell me what I want. Yes, tell me what I want.

[Paige Desorbo]

That shirt, it just happened to fall on it was a great Valentine's Day T shirt. I felt like. Cuz I was like, I'm not wearing pink or red. I did it the night before for Galentine's. I'm not doing it for not actual Valentine's.

[Unknown]

Yeah. And I think it was really, really cute and really, really fun.

[Paige Desorbo]

No, it was fun. We've had a fun. This was a fun leg.

[Unknown]

I think cuz we had a decent break before it. Yeah, we had a lot of energy. We were not done.

[Paige Desorbo]

No, we're not done.

[Unknown]

We still have one more.

[Paige Desorbo]

One more show tonight at 8:00pm.

[Unknown]

I. I was on the Bachelor. Did you know I was doing the Bachelor? I had told you.

[Paige Desorbo]

Wait, one more thing about Michael Kors and then let's get into the bachelor. Everyone was DMing me from the pictures from Michael Kors, being like, hannah looks so good. Hannah looks so good. Then I started getting DMs, being like, why do you guys look alike? Wait, you guys look like the same person in this picture. And then I had a thought. You know like when you get an animal and everyone's like, you look like your cat. That, like, Daphne and I are twins.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Paige Desorbo]

I feel like we've been spending so much time.

[Unknown]

No, we're blending.

[Paige Desorbo]

Well.

[Unknown]

I was. I did this interview recently where they were asking about us and our friendship and I realized, like, I am a comedian who low key, like, loves fashion.

[Paige Desorbo]

Like, I like creative stuff and I'm a fashion person that is low key comedian.

[Unknown]

So we're actually very similar, but like, different font.

[Paige Desorbo]

We're right there.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Paige Desorbo]

When we're merging, we're at the intersection.

[Unknown]

We are crowning. That's the wrong word.

[Paige Desorbo]

We're coming out of the womb.

[Unknown]

We're coming out of the womb. Yeah. So I was on the Bachelor last week. Everyone should watch if they haven't.

[Paige Desorbo]

It was so good. Also, I loved your outfit. Yeah. I support my friends. If there's a view to be had, I'm gonna view it.

[Unknown]

I was gonna say, the only time I text you about your outfit is to just be like, do you like your outfit? It. Because I just want to see the mood you're gonna be in for the night.

[Paige Desorbo]

You know me so well because I literally.

[Unknown]

I don't care what you're wearing. I just go, is it good? And you'll either be like, it is so good. Like, I'm obsessed. And I'm like, oh, thank God.

[Paige Desorbo]

That's the only reason I went to the Super Bowl.

[Unknown]

Yeah, you. You were so.

[Paige Desorbo]

I was like, I have an outfit for a Saturday night that I that needs to be shown.

[Unknown]

Leather hot pants.

[Paige Desorbo]

I was like, I'm wearing a leather jacket in 95 degree weather and I will keep it zipped.

[Unknown]

Do you prefer hot pants or underwear?

[Paige Desorbo]

Hot pants.

[Unknown]

And you heard it here first because you were wearing underwear Delusion for a while.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah, I was wearing underwear for a while.

[Unknown]

Underwear and tights. And now it's.

[Paige Desorbo]

And now it's like mini shorts.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

I like that better than my labia be swinging.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah, she'd be out there.

[Unknown]

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[Unknown]

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Yes. So the bachelor. I was wearing a vintage moschino suit. Shout out, Tabitha.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah. You looked really cool.

[Unknown]

And then they were like, things change. We're doing like a finance thing. And it was like, possibly going to be Barbara Corcoran. And I was like, Barbara's literally my best friend, so that's great. Somehow I end up on a finance date with. With Daniel from the batch. I'm sorry. With Daniel from Shark Tank, who's amazing, owns Kind Bar. So sweet and funny. Shout out, Daniel Abetsky. But I was like, why am I here? I'm here for the finance date. And they were like, we literally don't care. Go have fun. And I said, okay, well, I'm wearing a tie. I'm about to boss bitches around.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

There were all these rules for. Because, you know, like, they do these games.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

Did not understand the rules of the game, but I was supposed to explain them.

[Paige Desorbo]

Well. And. And we find ourselves in a conundrum.

[Unknown]

That was the pickle we were in. And they kept being like, if they do this, I go, look, my job was when the girls got answers, right? Was like to give them money. Like fake money. I'm not knocking a girl money.

[Paige Desorbo]

No. That's like illegal.

[Unknown]

No. They were basically like, give the girl certain girls money and not girls money if they're wrong. And I go, I'm sorry. In this town, in this economy, every girl is right. And then the girls were so funny because I know I'm a people pleaser they'd be like, hannah, give me more. And I'd be like, yes. So I gave everyone. They were like, the game has gone awry. You need to. Like, we need one winner.

[Paige Desorbo]

And I said, they're all winners.

[Unknown]

They're all winners. They're all here fighting for their life. Funniest part about filming the Bachelor is there was a point. And I don't know if I was just giggling too hard, but, like, some of the girls were gigglers. I think they forgot Grant was there.

[Paige Desorbo]

Wow. When the gigglers get together and they know there's other gigglers, I don't care if you're on the Bachelor. We'll stone a man.

[Unknown]

No, we. We were shooting for hours, and there was a moment where, like, they were. We were all just, like, kikiing.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

And I was like, guys, aren't you. Shouldn't you be talking to Grant? Yeah, because, like, you have to get Grant.

[Paige Desorbo]

Also, the name Grant, I do have to say.

[Unknown]

Beautiful man.

Beautiful man.

Beautiful, tall, sturdy, smart.

[Paige Desorbo]

I don't trust a man named Grant. I don't. Grant. What are you gonna grant? Grant what, sir? These wishes. I don't know. You know, it's just. It's giving. It's giving. He can do it. But will he, you know?

[Unknown]

Well, he was standing next to me, and, you know, I was. I wanted to ask him my Izzy trash questions, but I was being nice. I was being supportive because I.

[Paige Desorbo]

You're being professional.

[Unknown]

Professional. Which is something I haven't done in a while.

[Paige Desorbo]

I mean.

[Unknown]

Yeah, but there was a point where I was like, girls, you gotta start talking to Grant.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

But being. I watched the Bachelor, like, in college, I was so into the Bachelor, I actually had to take a break from it.

[Paige Desorbo]

It's crazy.

[Unknown]

Two hours a night.

[Paige Desorbo]

It's the only reality show I've never.

[Unknown]

Good. Why?

[Paige Desorbo]

I don' it's so.

[Unknown]

You should start from the beginning, I.

[Paige Desorbo]

Think, because when it was on, like, in its peak, you know, like when you're in middle school and, like, high school and you have things like that, like, okay, I had dance class on Tuesday. I guess I'll never watch those hour.

[Unknown]

Episodes to the point that it started, like, hurting my mental health, because I was like, I'm addicted to this shit.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

Four hours a week.

[Paige Desorbo]

It's the only reality show. So, like, I never know people from the Bachelor or the Bachelorette, and I feel like I'm, like, like, out. Left out of the joke. Everyone knows them.

[Unknown]

And then they started Bachelor in Paradise, which means, like, all these people that had lost in quotations on the bachelor in this place. And like, to stay, you have to be coupled up. Like it psychology, girl. Yeah. Yeah. Cuz you like when they say villa.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah, I love it.

[Unknown]

But the bachelor was interesting because I don't know what happened the previous night, but the girls were tired. They were like, we had like, an intense date or like, the rose ceremony lasted. Like, they keep them up like crazy.

You know what?

[Paige Desorbo]

I'd be scared of a tired giggler because a sleepy giggler. No, she's not to be trusted.

[Unknown]

The girls walked in and I was like, okay, we're gonna keep it light and fun. Yeah, no one's fighting today. Yeah, you're gonna keep it in. And then next, you know, at the end, they were like, how do you want to do a confessional? I started feeling ptsd. Yeah. It started to rise. And I said, you know what? Bring it back.

[Paige Desorbo]

Like, roll back the tape. Yeah, I've actually got some shit to say. I go, what do you want me to talk about?

[Unknown]

So they. So I, like, I made some confessionals in it, which was really funny.

[Paige Desorbo]

No, you did really good. It was funny.

[Unknown]

And I think I had, like, one good quote about giving girls money. So I'm happy about it.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

So anyway, I'm back on reality tv.

[Paige Desorbo]

You heard it here first.

[Unknown]

I recently felt. Speaking of age, I felt really old because I was talking to this girl and I mentioned something about high school and, like, your lockers. And she was like, ooh, we didn't have lockers. And I was like, oh. Like, what kind of school did you go to? And she goes, we had iPads. And I was like, what? So you just walk around with an iPad? You don't have lower back pain. You're not, like, you're not getting pushed into a locker. You're not forgetting your combination. And embarrassingly, being late to class. That's what made me a woman. Woman.

[Paige Desorbo]

So all their textbooks are on the iPad?

[Unknown]

I think so. But then it's like, you don't have an excuse. Like, you know, I forgot my textbook also, by the way, we were lugging, like, eight textbooks around.

[Paige Desorbo]

Wait, do you remember? You'd have to go pick up your textbooks before school started. But some girls, like, you could get your textbooks at school. Like, it was all, like, based on, like, your district. It is very Hunger Games.

[Unknown]

If you really Hunger Games. And then the one kid who was smart and put it in a rolly bag was brutally bullied.

[Paige Desorbo]

Brutally.

[Unknown]

Because that was socially unacceptable when they were actually just looking out for their L4 L5.

[Paige Desorbo]

Do you remember there would be like every year it was a. There was a different cool way to wear your backpack.

[Unknown]

Well, oh my God. Do you remember when like bags got popular?

[Paige Desorbo]

I had a bag.

[Unknown]

Yeah. That is like, I would do a bag shoulder.

[Paige Desorbo]

Even I couldn't do it. I would go to Victoria's Secret and whatever new tote they had. That was my backpack.

[Unknown]

Yes.

[Paige Desorbo]

Then there was also like a phase where like, if boy, like boys. I obviously didn't have go to school with boys. But like when we saw them, like, if they wore their backpack like really high up, like, there was something hot about it.

[Unknown]

Yeah, I remember that.

[Paige Desorbo]

And then there was like the one strap guys.

[Unknown]

Yes. Also they're the guys where I'm like, he doesn't have any books in his bag and he's not going to class today.

[Paige Desorbo]

Going to an all girls school. We did a lot of reverse backpacks where we would wear our backpack on the front. Like we were pregnant women. Because you could get into it easier.

[Unknown]

Wait, we had such different school lives. Like, I can't imagine going to an all girls school.

[Paige Desorbo]

It was mayhem.

[Unknown]

Mayhem in like a good way. Like, you just have like best girlfriends, but then also like insanity.

[Paige Desorbo]

Well, I think it's. I think being surrounded just by girls in high school, it lets your psychoticness fly freely, you know, because it's like, like no one here is gonna judge me because we're all the same. And so it lets you. It kind of. It just relaxes you. You're like, I don't give a.

[Unknown]

There was so many hormones going on. Like, I remember there's this one girl who I don't know about you, but, like, I never noticed girls boobs. Like, that's my friend. Like, I'm looking her in the eye. That's my friend. And every. Like, I was with some guys and they were talking about like how hot my friend was. And I was like, okay, you don't sexualize my friend. And they were like, have you ever seen her yawn in class? This. And I was like, what do you mean? Like, whenever she yawns, she like stretches her arms and she has like. And her boobs. Like, she stretches.

[Paige Desorbo]

The men should be locked away till they're 32.

[Unknown]

I literally was like, how dare you? She's tired. And then like, I see her yawning class. I'm like, her boobs are huge. But I remember thinking during class, like, oh, no, Camilla's gonna yawn again.

[Paige Desorbo]

No, she didn't get a full eight hours the men are hard. See, this is why. No, I can. I will never send my daughter to high school with boys.

[Unknown]

There's a lot of times that girls would get embarrassed to maybe, like, raise their hand and say something. Yeah, but then I would argue that, like, you still didn't raise your hand.

[Paige Desorbo]

Absolutely not.

[Unknown]

So imagine if there are boys in the class.

[Paige Desorbo]

I wouldn't have been able to do it. I also think it's based on, I think you know your child. I think my mom knew, and she's not going.

[Unknown]

I think I've said it before, how literally crazy I am. But. But I was at a tennis academy. We don't talk about that. I was homeschooled for two and a half years. It was crazy.

[Paige Desorbo]

We don't talk about that.

[Unknown]

It's a dark time. We don't talk about it. But who did it? It was a Florida online class, and I was like, at a tennis academy, living in a house. And we would, at 7am, have to go do school. And I put that in quotations for how many hours? For, like, two hours. And then we'd go play tennis for three hours. Lunch break, another three hours of tennis. And then gym. Like, it was.

[Paige Desorbo]

Was gym necessary?

[Unknown]

Gym was so unnecessary.

[Paige Desorbo]

We just played tennis for six hours.

[Unknown]

Once my mom visited, and she was, like, hanging out with us. And at the gym, I had a full body cramp. Like, I was lying down. Like, it looked like I had a seizure. My mom was like, okay, Mimi, maybe.

[Paige Desorbo]

We pushed her too hard.

[Unknown]

So, long story short, I definitely was burnt out. And it was the middle of the school year when I got back to New York, and I started working as a hostess at a Korean restaurant in Parksville, Brooklyn. And I had to go into a school. And that's how I started going to Beacon. But I showed up middle of junior year with the lore, the period. But this is how crazy I am. I showed up to history class, sat down middle of the year. Guy asked a question, raise my hand.

[Paige Desorbo]

No, that's so you.

[Unknown]

I. No, the homeschool actually was not good for my math. Like, I definitely fell behind in math.

[Paige Desorbo]

I mean, I was a regular school.

[Unknown]

Because there was a lot of cheating. Like. Like, we do online quizzes. Like, and we just be like, what's the answer? And you just Google it.

[Paige Desorbo]

Don't put me next to the bilingual kid for the Spanish final. Like, are you kidding? I'm Paige Desorable. You think I'm not cheating off this guy?

[Unknown]

Get the out of here. Street smarts. I just always was very Like. Like into school. I come from a family of teachers. Like, school was very priority. And I like to express myself through the art of raising my hand.

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

And then I remember Beth. Shout out Beth. It was that period ended and she came up to me and she's like, gorgeous, this girl. Gorgeous.

[Paige Desorbo]

But, like, this is Beth with the big boobs.

[Unknown]

Actually, Beth does have big boobs too, but that's beside the point.

[Paige Desorbo]

Okay, not the yawn girl.

[Unknown]

Not the yawn girl.

[Paige Desorbo]

Okay.

[Unknown]

The young girl was honestly too cool for me. But so Beth comes up to me, so beautiful, but, like, goofy, silly, down to earth. And she was just like, do you have anyone to go to lunch with today? And I was like, actually, I don't, because I literally just walked in three minutes ago. And she was like, come to lunch with me. And, like, that's kind of thing. Like, Beth, you never forget.

[Paige Desorbo]

Never forget.

[Unknown]

Shout out Beth. Like, to this day, I. With Beth. But my crazy lore was that they took me because I was playing for the boys tennis team. So the tennis coach was like, this girl, she has good grades. We got to get her in. We want to win a championship. And I. Tennis is a small world. So I knew the guys on the tennis team. So when I came into the school, I was already friends with all these, like, senior tennis boys. Then I went to prom with one of the senior tennis boys. We didn't touch. We didn't touch because it was friends. But, like, that was the lore in.

[Paige Desorbo]

A world full of bitches. Be a Beth.

[Unknown]

Be a Beth.

[Paige Desorbo]

Be a Beth.

[Unknown]

No. Shout out to Beth, who I still keep in touch with.

[Paige Desorbo]

You want to know? It is crazy that, like, you can have these moments in your life where you truly remember how. How someone else made you feel. And, like, I feel like I do have, like, a couple of those too, where I'm like, I will always stick up for that girl because she was nice to me in, like, this random situation that means nothing now.

[Unknown]

I'm also, like, even recently, like, if I see any. Or the last couple years when I've been getting, like, hate or negativity, if I see someone stand up for me when it wasn't cool to. Yes, I will never forget that. And I will ride like I feel.

[Paige Desorbo]

The way I do when I meet younger influencer girls. I'm like, I have to be overly nice to you because I know there's going to be a lot of people that are mean to you. I think situation.

[Unknown]

Also, people are meaner to you than me initially because you look bitchier than Me?

[Paige Desorbo]

Yeah. Yeah. That's just facts. No, People have been pretty mean to me my whole life. But I can never say. I can never say that I just.

[Unknown]

Had a Beth memory. I'm literally, literally the same person as I was in high school. Yeah. We're sitting at lunch and she's like, going through a breakup. And Beth and I are besties, obsessed with each other, and she pulls out a cigarette. I said, beth, what is that?

[Paige Desorbo]

I'm obsessed with Beth.

[Unknown]

I said, beth, what is that? And in her head, she's just like.

[Paige Desorbo]

Lights up in the cafeteria.

[Unknown]

No, no, we're like. Because we went out to eat in Manhattan.

[Paige Desorbo]

Oh, my God.

[Unknown]

We're just hanging out in Columbus circles smoking cigs. Not me. You know me. I said, bet. I thought this was life or death. I said, beth, you're gonna die if you take that cigarette. Cigarette. She goes, hannah, I'm obsessed. Having a day. I said, beth, if you. If you put that cigarette to your mouth right now, I'm not gonna be happy. And she was like, hannah, I need this right now. And I grabbed her cigarettes and I threw it in the trash. And she was like, Hannah, that was 15.

[Paige Desorbo]

Hannah. Oh, my God.

[Unknown]

I thought I was saving her life. Meanwhile, next day, she had cigarettes. I know where she got them from. I don't know who kept giving.

[Paige Desorbo]

Beth, wait, that's crazy.

[Unknown]

But I was. I was Mrs. Like, you were allowed to just leave.

[Paige Desorbo]

Leave school. I feel like I've been going out.

[Unknown]

To eat since fourth grade.

[Paige Desorbo]

I feel like in the suburbs they lock you in there.

[Unknown]

No, in fourth grade, public school, P.S. 321, we all could go out to eat. We'd go to Pinot's across the street and we get our pizza for A$50 or less.

[Paige Desorbo]

The only time they'd let you leave is if you literally begged the nurse, which I was always in there. I was like, I have to go home. They're like, you don't. I'm like, I do. I have to go. And then I text my mom and be like, can you call the school and say that I can come home?

[Unknown]

No, you text me like, can we? Vacant plan, parmesan John waiting for me when I get home.

[Paige Desorbo]

One time I just. This was the best thing about going to an all girls school. One time I just had my period so bad. It was just so bad. And you know, like, when you have your period so bad and you're like, you have to take that first poop of your period that was coming on. And I was like, I can't be in a school environment right now. And my mom was like, at work. They were like, we literally can't, like, release you. Your mom has a job. And I remember calling my grandma, being like, like, it's life or death. Can I please come? She was like, yeah, I don't care.

[Unknown]

See, not to, like, brag about how cool I was in high school because, honestly, I always had swag. But I did wear pads. I was wearing a full diaper. Like, when it would get full, like, I weighed 10 more pounds because I was wearing a pad.

[Paige Desorbo]

What year did you start wearing tampons?

[Unknown]

In my freshman year of college when I was going out, and my friend was like, we only have tampons. And I was like, I can't lose my virginity right now. And she was like, do you want me to do it for you? And I was like, no, I'll figure it out. And then I rammed it in, like, to the side wall of my vagina and then cried and then walked to a party.

[Paige Desorbo]

I've been a tampon girl since the beginning. Because you're a slut. Freshman year, I was going to prom, had my period, and my mom was like, okay, well, you have to put a tampon in. I was like, fuck yeah, you're sick.

[Unknown]

I cried when I was like, I can't.

[Paige Desorbo]

I was like, I'm an adult.

[Unknown]

Do you think tampons should have lube? I guess you're lubed up with the blood.

[Paige Desorbo]

Okay, and that's it for us.

[Unknown]

And that's our time.

[Paige Desorbo]

That's all we've got for today.

[Unknown]

And we've been cut off today. That's all we can leave you with. With. Thank you guys for giggling with us. We love you so, so, so much. And we have shows in two weeks. Our last leg of the tour in Salt Lake City, Tacoma, Tacoma, Vegas. Vegas.

[Paige Desorbo]

And someplace else.

[Unknown]

I don't know. You guys have to check the website for the surprise state that. We're going to talk to you later. Bye.

[Gary]

My dad works in B2B marketing. He came by my school for career day and said he was a big roas man. Then he told everyone how much he loved calculating his return on ad spend. My friends still laugh at me to this day.

[Unknown]

Not everyone gets B2B, but with LinkedIn, you'll be able to reach people who do get a $100 credit on your next ad campaign. Go to LinkedIn.com results to claim your credit. That's LinkedIn.com results. Terms and conditions apply. LinkedIn. The place to be to be do.

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