Podcast Summary: Giggly Squad

Episode: Giggling about cortisol, choking, and bidets
Hosts: Hannah Berner & Paige DeSorbo
Date: January 30, 2026

Episode Overview

In this high-energy, freewheeling episode, Hannah and Paige riff on everything from the chaos of public bathrooms and the life-changing wonders of bidets, to the science of cortisol in dating, male assistants, awkward airport tales, fashion fails, and the truth about reality TV friendships. Throughout, the duo pokes fun at themselves, their relationships, and modern life, delivering a mix of giggles, hot takes, and relatable anecdotes.

Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Life Updates & Rampant Giggling

• Two Episodes a Week

  • Paige wonders how they ever managed with just weekly recordings, emphasizing how much they have to say and how much content they'd forget otherwise (02:27).
  • Hannah: “Two episodes a week is like, I’m in a K hole.” (02:23)

• Paige’s Hair Drama

  • Paige laments her “awful hair color” and Hannah jokingly downplays it, encouraging her to embrace her “Megan Fox moment” (02:47–03:15).

2. Bathroom Gripe & Bidet Revelations

• Public Restroom Annoyances

  • Hannah rants about aggressive restroom stall openers. “Just lightly push and you’ll know if it’s locked or not. I’m sitting there in a hostage situation.” (03:39–04:31)

• Bidet Enthusiasm

  • Paige unveils her new high-tech toilet (“It wipes your ass for you…The seat is heated,” 05:13–05:30), swearing she can't return to basic toilets.
  • Hannah: “Not using a bidet is like flossing without brushing your teeth.” (05:36)

3. Celebrity & Pop Culture Chats

• Harry Styles & Concert Mania (06:18–07:29)

  • Discussion about the insanity of ticket prices and the uniquely efficient—but inconvenient—approach of having fans come to him at MSG.
  • “There’s no one in the world I’m a fan enough of to stand in a queue.” —Paige (06:53)

• Evolution of “Types” in Dating

  • Both reflect on whether their exes share any similarities, with Hannah noting tongue-in-cheek: “Definitely not sense of humor. Definitely not intelligence. Definitely not height.” (08:08)

4. Cortisol, Dating, and Mental Health

• How Men Affect Stress

  • Paige: “Now I’m like, what’s best for my cortisol, and that’s how I’m picking.” (10:02)
  • Hannah suggests women need a “cortisol check” before dating a guy, and that your 20s are for unregulated nervous systems, but 30s for regulation (10:15–10:28).
  • Discussion of losing appetite as a sign a relationship is too stressful.

• Role of Men in Women’s Lives

  • Hannah: “Men don’t help you” — reflecting on the lack of male assistants and whether straight men ever truly assist (11:08–12:07).
  • Notable for their humorous takes: “I want them young and scared.” —Friend (11:41)

5. Pop Culture & Gossip

• Victoria Beckham Gossip Rabbit Hole

  • Paige dismisses outlandish Page Six stories but asks, what would one do with a million-dollar allowance? (12:55–13:15)
  • Hannah: “More money, more problems.” (13:15)

• Happiness & Wealth: The Rock vs. Ring Metaphor

  • Hannah reflects on how some people are happier with a meaningful rock than a diamond ring if it’s from someone they love (14:11–15:34).
  • Paige shares, “I’d rather love on a bike than cry in a limo. And I always thought, not me.” (15:42)

6. Friendship & Reality TV

• Internet Speculation on Friendship

  • Paige addresses rumors they aren’t real friends, emphasizing their genuine bond.
  • “Our mantra for living is, I don’t care.” —Paige (17:56)

• Reality TV Manipulation

  • Hannah pulls back the curtain: “A producer literally puts his arm in front of me…No, let Paige handle this. They want to show two people being closer than someone else.” (19:13–19:48)
  • Both discuss how editing and storylines shape public perception.

7. Living with Men, Choking Incidents & Pain Tolerance

• Hannah describes her partner's melodramatic two-hour ‘choke’ episode and muses on how women simply handle pain better: “That’s why we bear children, you know?” —Paige (23:24–24:30)
• Amusing forays into “C-section vs. natural birth”, body types, and hypothetical surrogacy between friends (25:00–27:04).

8. Cat Mom Tangents

• Hilarious comparison of their cats Butter and Daphne’s personalities and sizes, likening them to actresses versus models (28:28–29:10).

9. Fashion Fails & Jean Struggles

• Ongoing Jean Drama

  • Paige’s endless quest for comfortable, cute jeans: “I always hate my jeans.” (31:01)
  • Both bemoan expensive denim failing to deliver: “I cannot with expensive things that are worse than cheap things.” —Hannah (32:55)
  • “If you’re ever hungry but don’t know what to eat…never happens to me.” —Hannah, on her food decisiveness as a “superpower.” (33:40–33:59)

• Outfit Hacks

  • Love of easy outfits: “I love a set…it helps you come up with the whole outfit.” —Hannah (36:32–36:46)

10. Kim Kardashian & Skims

• Paige buys Masterclass solely for Kim’s course. Both highlight how Kim’s SKIMS success was influenced by Kanye and his Yeezy line.
• “Skims is literally like if Yeezy was mainstream, successful, and for women.” —Hannah (37:44)

11. Influence in Relationships & Fashion

• Discussion around women subtly (or overtly) shaping their partners’ style.
• “I almost don’t want to teach you all my tricks because you’re gonna act like they are yours, which I've seen happen so many times.” —Paige (43:48)

12. Awkward Travel Tales & Customer Service Hell

• Hannah’s Alaska Airlines Snafu (48:53–53:54)
  • Her ticket doesn’t show up, blink-of-an-eye emotional spiral at the airport.
  • Decorated by a comically cathartic health insurance cancellation call on the plane, bonding with seatmate over the universal despair of customer service.

13. New York City Recommendations

• Both fail at giving tourist advice: “I haven’t known a fun place in five years.” —Paige (54:36)

14. Restaurant & Food Ordering Neuroses

• They unpack the etiquette and anxiety of dinner meetings, sharing food, and the paradox of being hungry—except when it counts.
• “Sharing is intimate. Like, I barely share with my husband, and now I have to, like, find the social norm of sharing food with strangers.” —Hannah (57:37)

15. Thoughts on "Traders" and Reality TV Production

• They can’t help but see reality games like “Traders” as producer-manipulated, not pure competition: “In my head, you think it’s rigged? Yes.” —Paige (60:31–60:42)
• Laugh about hypothetical situations with their moms on reality TV (62:02–62:11).

16. Closing the Loop: Comedy and Parental Perceptions

• Hannah tackles people’s discomfort over her stand-up and asserts, “I am my dad.” Paige reflects on coming from a more conservative background where people still ask about her TV and OnlyFans rumors (62:44–63:23).

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Stress and Dating:
  “If I can’t eat, that’s a serious problem. That’s when my mom pulls me aside and she’s like, you didn’t eat your Bolognese… The second I can’t eat a pasta because there’s a man in my life that’s making me nauseous… Yeah, I need to get rid of him.” —Hannah (10:33)

• On Modern Bidet Life:
  “This toilet has a bidet. It has a dryer. The seat is heated. It essentially does [wipe you].” —Paige (05:13)

• On Reality TV Manipulation:
  “A producer literally puts his arm in front of me…‘No, let Paige handle this.’…what you see on those shows is what they want you to see.” —Hannah (19:13–19:48)

• On Jean Shopping:
  “I always hate my jeans. Even if I see a girl wearing a pair of jeans, and I’m like, yes, that’s exactly what…I get them, and I’m like, I hate these jeans.” —Paige (31:01–31:08)

• On Airport Meltdowns:
  “One thing goes wrong at the airport and I’m like, I’m never gonna see my mom again.” —Hannah (50:05)

• On Sharing Food with Strangers:
  “Sharing is intimate. Like, I barely share with my husband…” —Hannah (57:37)

Timestamps for Key Topics

• Episode proper begins, two-episode format: 02:07–02:47
• Public restroom complaints & bidet chat: 03:19–05:47
• Pop culture – Harry Styles: 06:18–07:29
• Types in dating, sexual awakenings: 07:45–09:02
• Cortisol checks in relationships: 10:02–10:28
• Page Six, Victoria Beckham allowance: 12:27–13:15
• Rings vs. rocks, happiness: 14:11–15:34
• Friendship authenticity & reality TV: 17:05–19:48
• Choking story & pain tolerance: 23:34–25:22
• Jean and fashion woes: 31:01–33:18
• NYC recommendations: 54:28–55:40
• Food ordering anxieties: 57:03–58:26
• “Traders” producer manipulation: 59:37–61:41
• Parent reactions to jokes and persona: 62:44–63:23

Tone and Style

The episode reflects the hosts’ signature bantering, self-deprecating humor, candid personal stories, and lightning-fast topic changes. Their commentary is frank, sarcastic, and grounded in pop culture, with a dash of heartfelt friendship moments and girl-to-girl therapy energy.

For New Listeners

Whether you’re here for belly laughs, honest takes on fashion fails, pop culture analysis, intimate revelations about mental health and dating, or just a glimpse into two best friends who really, truly don’t care what others think—this episode is classic Giggly Squad.