Giggling about potions, face tape, and beer pong

Summary

Giggly Squad Podcast Summary

Episode: Giggling about potions, face tape, and beer pong
Hosts: Hannah Berner & Paige DeSorbo
Release Date: October 14, 2025

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Episode Overview

In this candid and hilarious episode, Hannah and Paige do what they do best: riff on each other, share absurd and insightful stories about their lives, vent about pop culture and the internet, discuss therapy and mental health, and reveal the silly and profound realities of being a woman in your 30s. Topics range from weather-induced existential dread and self-care routines, to therapy mishaps, internet haters, pretty-girl trauma, generational quirks, hair dilemmas, mother-daughter adventures, and the sacred art of beer pong.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

Monday Morning Mayhem, Vibes, and Cancel Culture

• The Nor’easter & Mood Setting (03:01–05:04)
  • Both discuss the drama surrounding a minor NYC weather event.
  • Paige jokes: “If you didn’t buy a canoe last weekend, you're foxed—that’s how people were acting.” (01:47)
  • They bond over their mutual desire to cancel plans in advance, referencing social anxiety.
  • “Do you ever have something and you’re like, I have something on Wednesday that's been ruining my week since Saturday night?” — Paige (04:55)
• Adulting Outfits & YouTube Anxiety (02:12–03:38)
  • Hannah bemoans being caught on video in comfortable, mismatched attire, wishing YouTube couldn't see her “child in the 1700s who has polio” vibe.

Therapy, Mental Health, and EMDR

• Social Anxiety Truths (05:09–07:03)
  • Hannah shares a mental health tip: “Social interactions are proven to be way less anxiety inducing when you do it than you think.” (05:09)
  • Paige retorts, “If a stupid boyfriend can trick your brain... you can trick your brain into anything.” (05:44)
• Therapy Pitfalls, EMDR Deep Dive (06:16–08:35)
  • Hannah introduces EMDR therapy, with Paige jokingly confusing it for EDM (music festivals).
  • “You have to go back to the worst time in your life… your villain origin story.” — Hannah (07:13)
  • They discuss trauma memory distortion: “People don’t remember what actually happened—your worst moment, the way you remember it, 100% not true.” — Paige (07:49)
  • Hannah describes the EMDR process: “You watch this [visual] with eye movements... you just feel that feeling, and... you actually get a calmness to it.” (08:12)

Women, Boundaries, and “No” as a Power Move

• Saying ‘No’ and Respect (11:47–13:28)
  • Hannah’s therapist revelation: “What if I told you people actually respect you less when you say yes to everything?” (12:51)
  • Paige: “If you don’t stand for something, you'll fall for anything.” (13:28)
  • Both stress the importance of preserving your energy and time in your 30s.
  • “You can’t be too accessible to people because they will suck you dry.” — Paige (13:40)

Friendship Dynamics & Being “So Different, But So Close”

• Why Their Bond Works (15:25–16:24)
  • Paige: “You love me, but you don’t want to be me... and that’s what it is. I don’t want to be you at all.” (15:25)
  • “That’s why we’re in such a good relationship. I think that's what you have to find in a partner.” — Paige (16:08)

Work, Male Confidence, and Female Competence

• TikTok Job Analogy (16:44–17:21)
  • Paige shares a TikTok story: “No woman has ever gone out for a job that she thinks she’s overqualified for... If a woman says she can land the plane, she can land the plane.” (16:44)
• Cosmetic Preferences for Surgeons (17:54–18:21)
  • Hannah jokes she’d never want a straight man to do her facial work: “Straight men don’t know you have faces.” (18:18)

Beauty Standards, Face Tape, and the Internet’s Judgment

• Cosmetic Consults & the Power of Suggestion (19:49–20:10)
  • Hannah: “Dentists will mention the tiniest thing and it plants a seed—I never noticed my uneven tooth before.” (19:49)
• Internet Haters & Physical Critiques (20:28–21:14)
  • Hannah: “People are commenting that my knees look like the face of a manatee. Now I can’t unsee it.” (20:28)
  • They decry the internet’s relentless criticism, especially of women’s bodies.

Moms, Vegas, and Generational Differences

• Mother-Daughter Antics (31:26–36:40)
  • Hannah shares stories of touring and working out with her energetic mom, Lenore, in San Diego and Vegas.
  • “Tiring your mom out is a real thing.” — Paige (31:44)
  • Lenore’s intensity at Pilates becomes a family lesson in generational energy management.

Overstimulation, Hair Dilemmas & Pop Culture Trends

• Paige’s Pixie Phase (38:16–39:17)
  • Paige confesses wanting to shave her head from hair overstimulation and blames Hannah for planting the pixie cut idea.
• Emma Stone Face Tape Allegation (50:43–51:29)
  • Hannah “spills tea” about speculation some stars (Emma Stone, Doja Cat, etc.) may use advanced face tape instead of surgery: “The technology’s gotten better where it doesn’t look... the human eye can’t see it.” (51:26)

Gen Z, Drinking Games, and Cultural Shifts

• Flip Cup & Beer Pong Discourse (57:12–59:38)
  • Hannah bemoans Gen Z's lack of competitive flip cup culture, blaming it for less resilience.
  • Both reminisce about the era when drinking games built character—and antibodies: “When people started using water in beer pong, that’s why Covid happened. We didn’t have the antibodies.” — Hannah (58:34)
• LOL in Texting (61:38–62:16)
  • Paige: “If I don’t put ‘lol,’ it means I’m mad at you.” (62:02)

Cat Drama: The Saga of Butter

• The “Lost Cat” Story (62:19–69:00)
  • Hannah recounts panic when her cat Butter went missing during a move, painting Butter as a wily con artist with many hiding spots, mob-boss energy, and little patience for men.
  • “Butter will deceive. She will fraud. She will do anything. You have to keep an eye on her.” — Hannah (65:26)
  • The story ends with relief as Butter reappears—completely unbothered.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “We can’t be managed.” — Hannah (01:14)
• Hannah on why Giggly Squad is a Monday ritual: “If we did Giggly Squad when we were rested... it’d be too calm. And we’d have nothing funny to say.” (03:53)
• “Mental health moment. Another one. I’m on my today. Yeah. Because I have glasses on. I’m so therapist.” — Hannah (49:27)
• “You ruin your gorgeous face. You ruined it. You ruined it. You’re done. You ruined... If I went and got my eyebrows waxed a little too thin, she would be like, you’re done.” — Paige on her mom (53:19)
• “Straight men don’t know you have faces.” — Hannah (18:18)
• “If you don’t stand for something, you'll fall for anything.” — Paige (13:28)
• “You love me, but you don’t want to be me. And that’s what it is.” — Paige (15:25)
• “If I don’t put ‘lol,’ it means I’m mad at you.” — Paige (62:02)
• “Butter will deceive. She will fraud. She will do anything. You have to keep an eye on her.” — Hannah (65:26)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

| Segment | Timestamps | |---------------------------------------------|-----------------| | NYC Nor’easter, Cancel Culture | 01:27–05:04 | | Mental Health & Social Anxiety | 05:08–07:03 | | EMDR & Therapy Talk | 06:16–08:35 | | Friendship, Boundaries, and Saying ‘No’ | 11:47–13:40 | | Job Dynamics & TikTok Plane Analogy | 16:44–17:21 | | Cosmetic Surgery/Surgeon Preferences | 17:54–18:21 | | Online Hate & Body Insecurities | 20:28–21:14 | | Generational Parent-Child Dynamics | 31:26–36:40 | | Face Tape & Celeb Speculation | 50:43–51:29 | | Flip Cup/Beer Pong & Gen Z Critique | 57:12–59:38 | | LOL, Text Tone, and Group Dynamics | 61:38–62:16 | | Butter the Cat’s Disappearance | 62:19–69:00 |

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Overall Tone & Vibe

Chaotic, self-aware, witty, and hyper-relatable. Hannah and Paige seamlessly blend jokes and banter with frank takes on therapy, mental health, societal pressures, and feminist issues, all while skewering themselves and the world around them. The episode is packed with offbeat stories, running jokes (about their mothers, being “pretty,” or their traumatic cat), and true intimacy.

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This episode is perfect for listeners seeking both laughs and genuine, real-talk camaraderie about womanhood, mental health, internet culture, and the quirks of adult life.

Transcript

[Podcast Host]

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[Hannah]

On ebay, every find has a story. Like, if you're looking for a vintage band te. Not just a tea, the band tee. You wore it everywhere. Until your ex, girlfriend, boyfriend, best friend stole it. But now you're on ebay, and there it is. Same tea from the same tour. The things you love have a way of finding their way back to you. Especially on ebay. Where else can you find that mint trading card you've been searching everywhere for? That's out of print? Or your first car, the one you wish you never sold. It has to be on ebay. Shop ebay for millions of finds, each with a story. EBay. Things people love. Sup, gigglers?

[Paige]

Gary, fix your Wi Fi.

[Hannah]

Manifest that shit. We can't be managed.

[Paige]

I mean, the day just got away from me. Hello.

[Hannah]

Hello, my gigglers.

[Paige]

Okay. And I go, magic.

[Hannah]

I was just thinking of the fact that we had a full nor'. Easter. Yeah, I don't know what a nor' easter is, but we had it. And it started rain. It was raining last night. And Paige texted me trying to cancel this morning. Cause it was raining. And I go, let's see the vibes in the morning.

[Paige]

The way people made it sound was that, like, if you didn't buy a canoe last weekend, you're fox. That's the way they were acting.

[Hannah]

Well, I was getting, like, weather alerts in, like, red. And, like, the red just was scaring me.

[Paige]

And it's like, in New York City. What would you do if there was a flood? Like, we would all just, like, stay in our apartments. Which actually sounds like my dream date.

[Hannah]

Cute. Daily date. Yeah, like, nothing would change.

[Paige]

I'm obsessed with your look right now, okay?

[Hannah]

I have my fake glasses on and I can't see, I can't hear.

[Paige]

I love it.

[Hannah]

And I wore a button up and I haven't brushed my hair. I did a red aid two days ago, so it's hitting me this morning.

[Paige]

You know who you are as an adult. First of all, it's so fucking crazy that we do Giggly Squad on Monday mornings.

[Hannah]

No, it's so off brand masochistic.

[Paige]

It's so like, oh, our podcast is easy. People like listening to it. Let's see how much harder we can make it for ourselves.

[Hannah]

And they go, your voices are so calming. Well, we're fighting demons inside.

[Paige]

Okay, two things I want to know. One, my Duncan matches my outfit, which is like my whole personality today. I feel like we're very, like, color sorted right now.

[Hannah]

Because you have red hair and. Yeah, yeah. Wait, what am I as an adult?

[Paige]

You like, you know when you're a little kid and you're like, oh, when I'm an adult, I'm gonna wear this. Or like, when I'm an adult, I'm gonna do this. And then you become an adult and you're like, that's insane. Like, why did I want to do that? You are that embodied because you, like, you woke up today, I walked into your apartment. You're stand there like a child in the 1700s who has polio. You have no pants on. It's like, I caught you in the middle of God knows what, and then you walk in, ready for the pod. You've thrown fake glasses on, a button up with sweatpants.

[Hannah]

I was used to those just having clips where people couldn't see our pants. And then I realized maybe last week that the YouTube videos, they could see your whole outfit. So that's something I'm dealing with internally also. Now I say internally because I'm wearing glasses now.

[Paige]

Yeah, you're circling back internally.

[Hannah]

I feel like if we did Giggly Squad when we both were, like, rested and, like, put together and, like, it'd be too calm. It would be too calm. And also we'd have nothing funny to say. I have a list up the wazoo.

[Paige]

I was gonna say, no one hates happy women more. You know, they're the most hated demographic in America. So, like, how dare we come on this pod and be in like a good timeline?

[Hannah]

I. Cause I did the red eye, which is my whole personality now. I ended up going to bed at like 6, woke up at 1am Saw your text, being like, maybe I can't make it in the morning. And I was like, let's see. Okay, calm down.

[Paige]

Wait, that's real friendship. Preemptively being like, hey, just a heads up, I might cancel the thing we have in 24 hours. So if I do, don't be alone.

[Hannah]

You also love canceling because you think you're gonna be tired. You love she'll come back on Sunday and be like, I can't do tomorrow. I already know I can't do tomorrow. Instead, I'm like, maybe let's have a nice sleep. Let's have some coffee, see how we feel. And she's like, I. I know in 72 hours I won't be able to do it.

[Paige]

No. Because do you ever have something and you're like, I have something on Wednesday that's been ruining my week since Saturday night.

[Hannah]

Yep. Yeah. Well, okay. Actually, quick mental health moments.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Because I think we need it. Yeah. First of all, I read something that said, like, you're. We have social anxiety. Me and you, for sure. And how actually social interactions are proven to be, like, way less anxiety inducing when you do it than you think. So basically telling yourself, like, you know how you put it in your head like, it's gonna be so horrible, and then how it actually is never as bad as you think it's gonna be. And I was like, wait, that's great. Cause I will spend a whole day stressed out about, like, one social thing I have to do. And you always, like, don't feel that bad after it.

[Paige]

No. You can trick your brain so easily. Like, if a stupid boyfriend can trick.

[Hannah]

Your brain to thinking he's a good.

[Paige]

Person after you've been with your brain for 32 years, and he can come in in two months and trick you.

[Hannah]

If you could believe in Santa Claus.

[Paige]

You can trick your brain.

[Hannah]

So I was trying to tell myself that. Cause I'll finish a show, and then I have to maybe meet someone. I don't know, after the show. And I'm like. In my head, I'll be like, I can't do this. You said an hour on stage, and you can't say hi to someone for two minutes?

[Paige]

I totally get that.

[Hannah]

And then I, like, read that. And when you read something online, it's always true. So I was like, okay, this is true. Also, one more thing. Therapist update. I've been doing edmr. No, it's emdr. EDM is a festival.

[Paige]

Yeah. EDM is a genre of music.

[Hannah]

It's really good. What is it? So basically, it sucks if you're having a good day, and then you have to do it because you're having a good day.

[Paige]

Wait, nobody talks about that. There have been so many times where I'm like, okay, but what if therapy is the problem? What if sexually, you've been putting in.

[Hannah]

A bad mood and be like, wow, life is worth living? And then I'm like, oh, fuck, I Have therapy. And you get in, and she's like. And you're like, okay.

[Paige]

In fact, it's not.

[Hannah]

She goes, let's go back to the worst time you ever had in your life, where you think shattered all your hopes and dreams.

[Paige]

The turning point, if you will.

[Hannah]

Let's go to your villain origin story. And then you have to go there. It's kind of like, it's not Scientology, but Scientology does this thing where. And I don't condone Scientology.

[Paige]

I'm uncomfortable that you're even.

[Hannah]

I think it was inspired by basically, with emdr, which Miley Cyrus did. You basically talk about traumatic moment. But the crazy thing is, is your brain, like, has created that traumatic moment to be, like, whatever it wants it to be. Yeah. Like, whether it made it easier or not, as bad or worse, a lot of the time it makes it worse. Like you put it.

[Paige]

And people don't remember what actually happened. Your worst moment, the way you remember 100%.

[Hannah]

So what she does is she's like, tell me the feelings you have in that event memory. And then you watch this thing go back and forth and, like, with eye movements, and you just feel that feeling, and it goes. It has this really cute sound. It goes like.

[Paige]

What are the images that you're looking at?

[Hannah]

It's just this white circle going back and forth. And then she goes, okay, what did you feel during that? And you say it, and she goes, let's focus on that emotion. So you're reprocessing the memory so that when you think about it, you actually get a calmness to it, and it kind of makes you not keep going back to that moment as painful.

[Paige]

Do you have a list of moments.

[Hannah]

Where you're like, okay, let's bring up the next one. Chapter two. And she's like, the tea is piping out. I'm like, I know, bitch. I know.

[Paige]

Sometimes, okay, this is, like, really freaky, but sometimes. And I. I don't mean to sound unrelatable.

[Hannah]

Is this about ysl?

[Paige]

Sometimes I'll try and, like, think of a traumatic moment in, like, my childhood or, like, my adolescence, and I'm like, oh, my God, I can't think of anything. Was it so traumatic I blocked it out? And then I'm like, wait, there's no way. I just don't have any traumatic moments. And then I catastrophize. Like, they were actually so bad I can't even remember them. But, like, not true.

[Hannah]

I think yours is more just like a deep genetic trauma.

[Paige]

Yeah, well, wait till my mom hears that. You're getting an angry text later. Oh, generation got it.

[Hannah]

Did you see that? What I DM do was very late last night, there was a woman in Italy who was like, she made potions that were poisons, and I'm going to mess up the story. But she gave it as, like, a face care. Face care serum. Okay. To all these women to get out of their abusive marriages. And, like, 600 men died during, like, the years that she was doing this. And then she ended up getting hired by, like, one of the kings because she was so good at poisoning people. And then she got too big, and they obviously hated her because she was like, God forbid, a woman. Instead, I'm doing well.

[Paige]

Yeah. And take care of her family. Wait.

[Hannah]

Yeah, so just look that up.

[Paige]

I will look that up. Because whenever it rains, I think you're.

[Hannah]

Related to her is what I'm trying to say.

[Paige]

Whenever it rains, I feel you try.

[Hannah]

To cancel the podcast.

[Paige]

I feel particularly witchy. Like, I feel like. I'm like, my intuition is on another level. Specifically when it rains.

[Hannah]

I know what your trauma is. You're too pretty.

[Paige]

I don't think that's it.

[Hannah]

No. It's hard. I know what it's like as a fellow pretty girl.

[Paige]

I don't think that's what it is. Because you walk in a room, everyone's.

[Hannah]

Like, this dumb, stupid, pretty bitch. I know.

[Paige]

It's like, I think it's really that I'm just so educated.

[Hannah]

Final number three. Mental. Are you text. Are you texting me?

[Paige]

Are you sexting my notes? Because I think I had it so.

[Hannah]

My final mental health moment. Actually, I talked about you in therapy because I. Well, it all comes down to me eventually. When I was doing the EDMR with the eyes going back and forth, she goes, are you falling asleep? And I said, I'm gonna be so real with you. I'm so tired right now. And she's like, okay, maybe she's, like.

[Paige]

Not part of the process.

[Hannah]

She's like, you could cancel. I'm like, I don't. Wait.

[Paige]

Are you going in person?

[Hannah]

No. So I'm just like, my eyes are going back and forth, and I'm like, this is putting me to sleep.

[Paige]

So she's playing this video over zoom, and you're watching it.

[Hannah]

Yeah, but she's watching me.

[Paige]

How many sessions have you done where you've done this?

[Hannah]

Only three. That's why there hasn't been, like, a real change in me yet.

[Paige]

A real breakthrough.

[Hannah]

No, but I mean, is it the.

[Paige]

Same moment you're going Back to each time or are you on to a new moment?

[Hannah]

I did the same moment for two of them, and then I, like, was in a mood about something else, and we, like, started that. It all is based on a feeling like, we could have a different moment, but we could be doing the same. EDMR based on the idea of, like, I'm worthless. I don't deserve love. Like, I mean, just light stuff like that. But recently, I was so tired, and she's like, why are you so tired? And I was like, I mean, I'm really. I have a lot of stuff on the calendar. And she. And it all comes back to me, like, not saying no to things, because I'm like, I really feel like I don't say no to things. Then you go a little deeper. And she said something that rocked my world. Even though every therapist I've been working on, like, how to say no, and they keep saying, like, just say no. I'm like, it's not that easy. Yeah. And she goes, what if I told you that people actually respect you less when you say yes to everything?

[Paige]

That's what your brain needed. You needed that repro. You needed it put in a different way.

[Hannah]

Because I was like, I have friends that I know will say yes to anything I say, and, like, I don't want to. I feel like I make. I don't want to make them uncomfortable because I know they're doing things they don't want to do. And, like, Paige says no to everything, and, like, I love her more. And she was like, you have to be like Paige, where she says no to things. I'm like, that's what she's been helping me because she's never said no to something. And I watch the interaction, and people, like, disrespect her because it's like, you're just showing them you value your time more, and they value you more. And I'm like, as a people pleaser, I'm like, oh, I've been doing this all wrong.

[Paige]

If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything.

[Hannah]

But I really thought that, like, if I said no to something, that it would piss people off. But it's true. You give people an inch they want.

[Paige]

They take a mile.

[Hannah]

Yeah. I was gonna say a farm, but, yeah, a mile.

[Paige]

You can't be too accessible to people because they will suck you dry. Yeah.

[Hannah]

Cause I've done a couple things recently for people, and then they want more. And I'm like, oh, I thought that was gonna make you happy with Me. But I realized they're not happy with me. It's just, like, a selfish thing. Yeah.

[Paige]

They're using you. One of my things I hate is being used, and I think that translates into, like, my working where, like, it never used to translate into working. It used to be like, you're using me to, like, hang out with this person, or you're using me because you want to go to this, like, place and I can go, or, like. And now it's, like, more in a work thing where it's like, you're. You want to work with me because you want to make money off of me and, like, scram.

[Hannah]

Yeah, scram. We. I love saying scram. Yeah.

[Paige]

I love, like, I love cutting people off. I love cutting people.

[Hannah]

This is your 30s, by the way.

[Paige]

I love cutting people off. Like, that feeling is so good, but the next best feeling is watching them not have access to you and see how they have to move in the world without you. And you're like, you have no idea what's going on. You're like. Then you even get more validated of, like, wow, I really had my. In charge. Like, I was in charge.

[Hannah]

I also feel like when you're with the right people in your life, like, you never feel overextended. Yeah. Because, like, they respect your boundaries kind of thing.

[Paige]

You're the only person that I feel like that with, like, that I could hang out with all the time. Do you want to know what it is?

[Hannah]

Because you're.

[Paige]

Yeah, I actually do miss me so much.

[Hannah]

Worthy only you come to my Instagram history. I miss you. I was like, okay, send a text right here.

[Paige]

Do you want to know what it is? You love me, but you don't want to be me. Like, things about me disgust you. Like, you would never want to be me, but you love that I'm me. Yes. And that's what it is. Like, I don't want to be you at all.

[Hannah]

We both feel literally disgusting.

[Paige]

Like, we'll do something. You'll be like, I in your mind. I know. You're like, I would fucking never. She's so dumb.

[Hannah]

When my mom tried to dress me in dresses with a matching hat, I was like, burn me at the stake. I'd rather kill myself than be dressed in this matching set. And then you show up in a matching set, and I'm like, wait, I love that for you.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Yeah. Well, that's why it works. Yeah.

[Paige]

That's why our.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Paige]

That's why we're in such a good relationship. And I think that's what you have to find in a partner. Because there's too many people out here marrying their biggest off, and it's really like, they just want to be. They wish they had your life. They want to be you.

[Hannah]

I even was talking about, like, some work stuff, and there was, like, a hiring process. And there's something about when you hire someone who, like, thinks they can do your job better than you, like, that's where tension arises. It's a lot of, like, how if there's a manager that, like, wants to be in front of the camera kind of thing, like, that kind of vibe, or like, yeah, I saw this TikTok.

[Paige]

Video, and it was this girl being like, if you were on a plane and the plane was going down and someone said, can anyone land this plane? And a man raised their hand, and a woman raised their hand, who are you picking? And the woman said, I pick the woman. And the person was like, why would you pick the woman? She was like, because no woman has ever gone out for a job that she thinks she's overqualified for. We do the opposite. So if a woman is raising her hand saying she can land a plane, she most likely can land on me.

[Hannah]

She's done it.

[Paige]

And the guy, there's a more, like, ego. Yeah. There's more of a chance that he's lying and being like, yeah, I could probably do it because men, like, oversell themselves because they're like. That's how they're, like, raised that, like, they can. They might not be qualified, but they're trying out for job.

[Hannah]

I met a guy on the road doing crowd work who says he does straight man. He says he does facial reconstruction surgery, which is, like, a very serious thing. Like, if someone's like, okay, wait, I'm.

[Paige]

Going to a facial balance doctor after this.

[Hannah]

And I'm so excited, but this is my thing. I looked at him, I said, I love your work. I love what you do for the community. I do not want a straight man working on my face.

[Paige]

No.

[Hannah]

Straight men would be like.

[Paige]

Wouldn't be like me at all.

[Hannah]

They'd be like, look, your tits are great. Not sure about the face. Haven't even looked at it. Get out of here.

[Paige]

I want a straight man.

[Hannah]

I want a bitchy gay man being like, you're cunt. Like, yes, we're hitting every angle. Like a straight man Reconstructing my face. Straight men don't know you have faces.

[Paige]

No, I don't think they know proportions.

[Hannah]

What is the facial balancing thing? Is this.

[Paige]

So two of my Friends have gone to this person, and they were like, basically, you go in and you say, like, because I've never gotten bow ties.

[Hannah]

Everything okay at home?

[Paige]

So one of my girlfriends saw a picture of herself, and she nearly threw up. Okay. She was like, I have to do something. She goes to this doctor.

[Hannah]

Was it just the lighting? Possibly.

[Paige]

She just, like, was having a moment, and she was just like, I will end it if I don't get some plastic surgery. So she goes to this doctor, and the doctor was like, I don't know if she's a dermatologist or if she's a plastic surgeon, but she's basically.

[Hannah]

Or she's just a sketch artist.

[Paige]

She's like, Botox forward. She's more like skincare. And, like, different things you can do before you get to Botox.

[Hannah]

Got it.

[Paige]

But if there was something you wanted to tweak, like, she would be like, well, I would put a little Botox over here. Cause that'll help over there. But, like, you don't need a.

[Hannah]

You know, it's subtle.

[Paige]

It's subtle. It's more like balancing rather than, like, preventative or, like, age. It's more of like.

[Hannah]

Is this about your eye bone?

[Paige]

I knew you were gonna go there. I knew you were gonna go there. I'm just inquiring.

[Hannah]

It's a consultation.

[Paige]

It's a consultation.

[Hannah]

It's an information gathering meeting.

[Paige]

Now, if I walk in there, and she's like. She's like, it's about time. I'm doing whatever she says. Okay.

[Hannah]

I do have to say, I went to a dentist once, and they were like, for. You know how you're like, if you would do anything, what would you do? And she mentioned, like, she would, like, fill in, like, one part of my tooth. And I'm like, I never even saw that before. I don't need that. The way it's grown in my head. Like, she planted a seed where four years later, I'm like, if I have to look at this uneven tooth any longer, I didn't even know it was uneven before.

[Paige]

No. And that's. The Internet will do that to you. I'm like, wait a minute. I started zooming in on my own pictures. I was like, they're right. How can I not get this?

[Hannah]

You did an interview recently, and the quote was like, every now and then, a hate comment just eats.

[Paige]

Yeah. And it does. And, like, I'll give credit where credit's due.

[Hannah]

Well, I'm dealing with some abuse online currently, because I'm wearing a skirt on stage because I have some jokes that involve the skirt and my knees are out.

[Paige]

And if you're gonna do a man's job, how dare you dress like a woman?

[Hannah]

No, but because my knees are out, people are, like, commenting on my knees. And this guy said that my knees look like the face of a manatee. And now I can't unsee it. But this is the thing. Like, are we not allowed to have.

[Paige]

I never even looked at a knee.

[Hannah]

And, like, I have muscular legs, so, like, there's muscles around the knee, but, like, I just feel like we've gone too far.

[Paige]

We've gone too far criticizing women if we're going to.

[Hannah]

But I'm like, is my face that stunning that all he has left is my knee?

[Paige]

There's a woman on TikTok who made a video basically being like, I shower once a week, maybe twice a week. And the Internet was like, something's wrong with you mentally. There's, like, things are going on. There's more factors. Like, there's no way you think that's normal. Whatever. Instead of fighting the Internet back, she kind of leaned in and was like, you're right. There's, like, so many factors on why I don't shower every single day. She has now taken to TikTok, documenting her showering every single day. She's 26 days in.

[Hannah]

Is she enjoying it?

[Paige]

She's loving it.

[Hannah]

She's obsessed with it.

[Paige]

She's like, I'm glowing. People are like, yeah, you're clean. Like, you have no dirt on your face.

[Hannah]

Wait, remember the girl with dirt on her face? Is she okay? Has anyone checked on her?

[Paige]

Oh, that girl that was like, I'm not washing my face for seven years.

[Hannah]

Yeah. And she had like.

[Paige]

I think she's, like, back to normal.

[Hannah]

Oh, you're like, I think that girl.

[Paige]

That had a scar on her face.

[Hannah]

Yeah, I was down that rabbit hole.

[Paige]

For the Internet has gone in so many different pockets that I'm like, I.

[Hannah]

Think we're dealing with a lot of stuff, and we just like to take it out on a woman online. Yeah, that's easier than, like. Than dealing with societal issues, systemic issues. Let's just make fun of a girl who, if she has a scar or.

[Paige]

Not, well, I think she was, like, faking that scar or, like, it wasn't.

[Hannah]

As bad as she was making it out.

[Paige]

But I honestly, I blame, like, Netflix because, like, they've put out so many true crime documentaries and, like, people are investigators.

[Hannah]

I did watch the Ed Gein documentary, I told you, and some girl was going viral for saying that her grandma was one of the women that he dug up. But then I'm like, are you just saying that? Oh, I don't know.

[Paige]

You can't tell me anything on the.

[Hannah]

I'm like, you were like, like, let's talk about it.

[Podcast Host]

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[Hannah]

On ebay, every find has a story. Like if you're looking for a vintage band tee. Not just a tee, the band tee. You wore it everywhere until your ex, girlfriend, boyfriend, best friend stole it. But now you're on ebay, and there it is. Same tee from the same tour. The things you love have a way of finding their way back to you, especially on ebay. Where else can you find that mint trading card you've been searching everywhere for that's out of print? Or your first car, the one you wish you never sold. It has to be on ebay. Shop ebay for millions of fines, each with a story. Ebay Things people love this episode is.

[Podcast Host]

Sponsored by Better Help. Better Help Therapists have helped over 5 million people worldwide on their mental health journey. And October 10th is World Mental Health Day. And this year, we're saying thank you to therapists. BetterHelp has quality therapists and work according to a strict code of conduct and are fully licensed in the US BetterHelp does the initial matching work for you so you can focus on your therapy goal. And with over 30,000 therapists having served over 5 million people globally. So for this World Mental Health Day.

[Paige]

We'Re celebrating the therapists who've helped millions.

[Podcast Host]

Of people take a step forward. If you're ready to find the right therapist for you, BetterHelp can help you start that journey. Our listeners get 10% off their first month at betterhelp.com gigglysquad that's BetterHelp. H-E-L-P.com gigglysquad. You guys know that Hannah and I have been waiting to take a trip to Copenhagen. Instead of cramming into a hotel, we can book a stay on Airbnb. I've been looking at an apartment that is spacious and right in the middle of the city. It has everything we need to feel at home. And I found it by searching Airbnb's guest favorites, which are some of the best rated and most loved homes on Airbnb. I can imagine us sitting on the balcony in the morning, spilling our latest gossip and being so thankful we have a couch to lay on after a day of shopping. This home will give us space to actually enjoy each other's company instead of feeling like we're living out of suitcases. That's the difference. In a hotel, you're usually scattered across different rooms or meeting in the lobby. But here, we can have one space that feels like ours or where we can relax, giggle, and just be together. It will turn a simple trip into something we talk about for years because the place itself will become part of the memory. So if you're planning your own international getaway, check out Airbnb to get inspired.

[Paige]

Time.

[Hannah]

It's always vanishing. The commute, the errands, the work functions, the meetings.

[Paige]

Selling your car. Unless you sell your car with carvana.

[Hannah]

Get a real offer in minutes.

[Paige]

Get it picked up from your door.

[Hannah]

Get paid on the spot so fast you'll wonder what the catch is.

[Paige]

There isn't one.

[Hannah]

We just respect you and your time. Oh, you're still here. Move along now. Enjoy your day. Sell your car today. Carvana. Pickup fees may apply. I was in your favorite place this weekend. Vegas. Vegas. It was wild because these, like, preteens were running around and they were, like, not wearing a lot of clothes. But I missed Vegas and my mom was like, oh, what's going on? Because we're in the casino and I Go. Oh, there must be a pool party. And then I realized they weren't wearing bikinis. They were like.

[Paige]

You know for a fact that they were, what, like, 13, 14 years old?

[Hannah]

They were probably, like, 16, 17, 18. But I'm of that age where I'm like, yeah, it's a pool party, and they're like, no, that's what they're wearing to the club.

[Paige]

No, wait. You are so gonna be the mom where they're pulling things over on you.

[Hannah]

I can't tell you.

[Paige]

I have to call you and be like, hannah. Obviously not. They're not studying on a Saturday night. Did you check in their bags?

[Hannah]

This is my question. How have. Like, I never can tell when my friends are on drugs, but, like, do they.

[Paige]

Wait, just pause. Pause. Because that's actually one of my favorite things about you, is to be out with you and for you to watch other people be on drugs.

[Hannah]

As someone who's seen this happen to me, can you just tell me for real right now? Do they talk beforehand and say, don't tell Hannah, or do they think I'm already high because I'm energetic? Is it strategic because they have gotten past me? They've gotten the wool over my eyes every time, or am I just not looking in the right direction?

[Paige]

I think it's more.

[Hannah]

Cause no one tells me.

[Paige]

No one tells you.

[Hannah]

Why don't I even get an invite?

[Paige]

Nobody invites you, I think, because you don't give off the vibe that you would be into it, so it's like, a waste of a conversation to even have.

[Hannah]

That's like, that one guy who, like.

[Paige]

Hannah, you cried last time you smoked weed.

[Hannah]

I know, but not everyone knows my history. No, like, not even.

[Paige]

Even in college, no one, like, ever offered you, like.

[Hannah]

No, but I was on the tennis team, so it was like. It was a very, like, drug. We get drug, but, like, I don't know what energy I'm putting off. No one's even offered me a cig. Not even a drunk cig. Do I give snitch energy? Do I have snitch face?

[Paige]

You're giving narc.

[Hannah]

Do I look like an undercover cop?

[Paige]

No. I'm gonna be honest. I haven't been offered drugs in a while.

[Hannah]

But also, like, I've been at parties where people don't know that I cry over weed. That, like, they all just disappear in the bathroom, and I'm sitting outside, and they're all in the bed bathroom, and I'm like, someone has a stomachache, and then they come out and I'm like, is everyone okay? And they're like, yeah. And then they're, like, dancing. And I, like, no one ran it by me. This is why I don't like social situations.

[Paige]

My favorite stories still to this day is you being like. And then they went into the bathroom, and then they came out very energetic, dancing all over. What do you think that means? Get out of there.

[Hannah]

I didn't get it.

[Paige]

I know you didn't.

[Hannah]

So anyway, everyone in Vegas was having fun. I watched a Luther Vandross documentary.

[Paige]

And how was that?

[Hannah]

Oh, my God. Have you. Do you remember Luther Vandross?

[Paige]

I mean, not personally, but, yeah, I've heard some things.

[Hannah]

The thing about Luther Vandross is it starts and this man is flaming gay. And he has the voice of, like, the best voice ever. And he was always, like, battling his weight, this man. The way he would have loved Ozempic. Yeah. But he never was able to come out. I know. And it's like the guy Brian Nickel.

[Paige]

Oh, it's so sad, Billy.

[Hannah]

If you think about it, he became, like, a heartthrob. Cause he was gorgeous and had an amazing voice. And he was singing love songs. So he was afraid, like, George Michael, like, if he came out, that the girls would turn on him. I would argue the girls would not turn on him. We're always there for you. Yeah.

[Paige]

We love the gays.

[Hannah]

I recommend that documentary. My mom was on tour with me.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Which look, my mom is. You'd think she did cocaine. She is hyped up. Yeah. She doesn't sleep energetic. When she's awake, she's awake. And then at, like, 10:30, she's out.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

But, like, I was taking naps, and she was just standing over me, and she's like, hello. And I'm like, mom.

[Paige]

She's, like, befuddled. She's in.

[Hannah]

She's pacing in the room. Yeah. But so I was trying to tire her out. So I was like, let's do a Pilates class, please. Tiring your mom out is a real thing.

[Paige]

No, tiring your mom out is that.

[Hannah]

Your dad's not gonna. Your dad can't keep up.

[Paige]

There is a moment in your 30s where it's now, like. And if you don't have kids, it's almost like the universe preparing you for kids because your parents are now your children.

[Hannah]

Well, they are hyped up. They're hyped up. And then my dad is always napping.

[Paige]

They honestly don't know their limit. They get overtired. Okay. They think they can do more than they Can I tell her?

[Hannah]

Let's go to Pilates in the morning? Because I need you to start simmering down around like, 5pm you have to.

[Paige]

Give them something the next day to look forward to.

[Hannah]

Well, it was like when she would visit me in college. She'd come with me to classes, and I'd fall asleep in class. Cause I was tired. And she would take my notebook and start writing notes for me. Wait, wait, you don't know this? Well, I like 6am workouts.

[Paige]

You took cheating to the. You're like, my scribe is here.

[Hannah]

Literally, she's like, raising your hand. Can you repeat that? We couldn't hear you back here. Wait, my daughter's snoring.

[Paige]

How did you get your mom into the class?

[Hannah]

I think there was like. Well, Wisconsin. There were like, huge classes, so it was very easy to sleep.

[Paige]

See, one day you were just like, my mom visiting. You know, why don't we kill two versus one stone? You come with me, I'll nap. You write everything down. Wait. That's genius.

[Hannah]

I know. It was amazing. She had better handwriting than me.

[Paige]

College assistants.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Paige]

You know, like, I don't care about my kid getting in. Like, me paying to get them into a school. How about I pay for an assistant to walk around with them, make sure they have their stuff?

[Hannah]

That is a new level of tutoring. So anyway, we live by Pilates. We love Pilates. This is a Pilates family. So when I go to a new city, I try to find the Pilates class. You guys, we say, I'm going to your city, and you have a good Pilates recommend it for me. So I find this place called Salt Vault. And I was like, sounds as good.

[Paige]

As any of them.

[Hannah]

Yes. So we get there and it says, like, heated. Yeah.

[Paige]

No T. It has, like, no E. It's just a D. Yeah, it looks intense. It's like heat apostrophe.

[Hannah]

There's always an X somewhere. I'm like, why did we throw in an X? This is. And it's like. You know, it just looked intense.

[Paige]

Like the whole room's pink. And that part just, like, black.

[Hannah]

And for people don't know, like, my mom. She's tiny, Small. You hug her too much, you'll break her. She is dainty.

[Paige]

Yeah. It needs iron.

[Hannah]

Pills.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

No, actually, calcium. Iron.

[Paige]

Yeah. She's anemic.

[Hannah]

So we. We immediately are looking at each other, and I was like, I don't know if this is what I thought it was. Yeah. And we walk in, and the lady's so nice at the desk. And I go, is this performer Pilates? And she goes, oh, no, this is Matt with music. And I go, is it heated? She goes, not this class. I go, great. Look at my mom, Matt. Pilates is scary. Yeah, and heated. My mom's like, we could do this. Like, we could do this. And I go, okay, okay, Lenore. So we get in. The room is like a club. It's immediately spins, spins, spins. And my mom's looking at me. It's all these, like, hot girls. And then my mom's a hot girl, obviously, but she's like, I don't know if we should do this. And I'm like, mom, we can't get out now.

[Paige]

Yeah, like, we're in it.

[Hannah]

We're in it. We already got our towel.

[Paige]

I have my water bottle down. We're here. We've made a statement.

[Hannah]

Everyone's seen us.

[Paige]

They handed out towels. We have one.

[Hannah]

I'm like, I already used the bathroom. Like, we can't leave after that. So my mom goes through a 45 minute class of intense. Like, it was one of those, like, ba, ba, ba, ba, ba.

[Paige]

Now, during it, was she like, I hate this, like, to you. Or like, was she doing it?

[Hannah]

We were just making eye contact and she was smiling. And at first I thought she was having fun. And afterwards she told me, when you're going through severe pain, if you smile, it's supposed to help, it hurt less. I said, mom, I thought you were acting, having a good time. And she's like, no, I was scared for my fucking life.

[Paige]

No, I thought I was having a heart attack.

[Hannah]

So the class was fucking amazing. Salt Vault, San Diego. The instructor was spectacular.

[Paige]

Now, did she take a nap after or she wasn't tired?

[Hannah]

Yes, thank God. But like, there was a moment where I was like, this is. She's only like 60. But like, this was elder abuse. Like, I threw her in this class.

[Paige]

No. Cause you have to be worried about.

[Hannah]

And my mom, like, she goes hard, like when she's like, oh, it's okay. You can put your knees down. Like, my mom wasn't doing it.

[Paige]

I'm like, mom, she wasn't doing modifications.

[Hannah]

She wasn't modificating. And Mom's like.

[Paige]

We'Re better for it.

[Hannah]

We're better for it. So, yeah, that was scary, but we survived.

[Paige]

Wow. You took her to Vegas. This was in Vegas.

[Hannah]

This was in San Diego. Vegas was funny because she'd already seen my show like three times. And she always have notes. Lenora has notes. And we've made some great additions, edits, but then she decided to go to Earth, Wind and Fire.

[Paige]

By yourself.

[Hannah]

Yeah. Which, by the way, if you don't listen to Earth, Wind and Fire, go download that on Spotify.

[Paige]

Lenore, Heathwind and fire is my BravoCon.

[Hannah]

Lenore went alone to Earth when a fire was dancing, sending me videos and, like, going on stage. She ended up catching my show afterwards.

[Paige]

She had a time in Vegas.

[Hannah]

Had a time in Vegas. We were by, like, the gondolas. We almost did a gondola, except it would be my nightmare to be, like, stuck on a gondola. And then the guy starts singing. And you pay, like, a lot of money to be on the gondola.

[Paige]

I don't know why anyone would ever do that.

[Hannah]

I was like, can I pay you to stop singing?

[Paige]

My worst nightmare is, one, being trapped somewhere and then two, having to listen to someone sing.

[Hannah]

A man sing?

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

No, a man singing. So, yeah, Vegas was. Was Vegasing. Okay. It was great. How are you?

[Paige]

Let's start the ball.

[Hannah]

How's it going? Let's start the ball.

[Paige]

You know, I've been good. I've been really good.

[Hannah]

I like your ponytail.

[Paige]

Okay. You know what?

[Hannah]

I knew there'd be a story.

[Paige]

It is so overstimulating being a girl like this more. Do you ever just. You've been infiltrating my brain because more recently, I'm like, I have to shave my head.

[Hannah]

Wait.

[Paige]

I'm so overstimulated by my hair.

[Hannah]

Paige has been, like, sending me cute, like, pixie cut looks, and I. I start evil laughing and go, no, literally, this.

[Paige]

I think this is what you've done our whole friendship. You get one idea and you're. Let me see if I can implant this in Paige's.

[Hannah]

And I say it to you and you go, are you fucking kidding me? And I go, just wait. Four years.

[Paige]

No, literally, your track record is getting less and less years. It took six for a cat. The pixie might come in four. We don't know.

[Hannah]

Well, Kim K. Did it, but hers looked, like, so similar to her mom's. Yeah.

[Paige]

And I. I didn't love hers, honestly.

[Hannah]

I just.

[Paige]

And she's my north star. But, like, Like.

[Hannah]

But it just shows like it's happening. The girls are shaving their heads.

[Paige]

No, Pixies are, like, happening all around the world. The men have been doing it for years.

[Hannah]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Paige]

So we'll just, like, see. It's not happening anytime soon. But it's just like when it's raining and you're also a woman and you've just gotten over Your period, everything is over. Stimulating. Yeah.

[Hannah]

You try to cancel the day before.

[Paige]

Like, I just. I can't have hair on my face. Like, I can't. The thought of putting leggings on. Like, I just. I can't.

[Hannah]

It's one of those things where, like, you said, like, we don't want to be each other, but my thing is, every now and then, I'm like, if I was you, yeah, I'd shave my head.

[Paige]

Wait, that is so funny. Because sometimes I'll be like, hannah's not even worried about her outfit for this. Like, she literally doesn't care. She'll pick it tomorrow. And I'm over here. Three days of agony. Like, it's not right. Like, you tried to spring something on me today to do on Wednesday, and all that was going through my head was like, but I don't have an outfit. And, like, I know you don't have one either, but, like, it's more critical that I don't have an outfit.

[Hannah]

But also, like, I'm gonna be stressed too, but I'm just gonna have, like, two hours of stress right before the event. Yeah, where you'll stress where.

[Paige]

I've already actually agreed to come. Canceled it, Going anywhere, texted the necessary people, said, scratch that idea. I'm actually not going anymore.

[Hannah]

Anywho. Well, this is what sucks. When we. When there's an event and one of us wants to go, then the other one kind of, like, goes. But it's, like, kind of. It's hard.

[Paige]

It's just hard. But it is weird socializing at events.

[Hannah]

Without each other, because I'm like, no, I don't.

[Paige]

I can't do it, actually. It's like. It's unbelievable.

[Hannah]

You were doing a lot of press, and normally I'm holding your hand. Wait, what happened?

[Paige]

I'm backstage at Jimmy Fallon, right? Okay. I take my beta blocker. I do hair and makeup. I get there. I do my TikTok. I do the pictures. I see Jimmy. I take my beta blocker right on time of, like, it's gonna hit right when I'm going out there.

[Hannah]

I'm.

[Paige]

I'm actually not as anxious as I thought I'm going to be. But I'm not speaking like, oh, you've gone mute.

[Hannah]

They're doing the TikTok, and they're like, can you just move your mouth if you know me?

[Paige]

I go mute at a certain point where then it's like, don't talk to me. Don't touch me. Don't even really look in my general direction.

[Hannah]

Wait, Was your team like, who is this?

[Paige]

Everyone's like, paige is, like, I think, a little bit anxious.

[Hannah]

Did you fall asleep in the green room?

[Paige]

No. But obviously my mom walks over, and she's like, you're not nervous, are you? Everyone says you're nervous, but you're not, right? You're not.

[Hannah]

And she goes, you always do this.

[Paige]

Yeah. And I'm like, okay. No, I'm not nervous.

[Hannah]

She goes, hey, babe, stop.

[Paige]

I was doing my hair like, natural, curly waves. So at one point, Mitchell was like, dip your head over so I can fluff up your hair and then flip it back. So I do it, and I get, like, a head rush of such anxiety.

[Hannah]

It's the little things that'll get you.

[Paige]

And I'm like, whew, that was scary. I'm never doing that again. So then I'm standing literally at the door right before you walk out, and Mitchell turns and goes, do you want to do one more head flip before you go out? And I turn and I go, I'll have a panic. I can't flip my head right now, Mitchell, because I'll have a panic attack.

[Hannah]

People don't know Paige's team. Mitchell runs the show. Paige, hair is the forefront, and then everything else is an accessory. Every now and then, you'll turn and Mitchell just has. What is it called?

[Paige]

A flamethrower. What is this, Like a wind.

[Hannah]

Wind blower. Leaf blower. Leaf blower. Mini. How did you get the leaf blower into security?

[Paige]

The amount of places he's whipped us, we're like, how did that fit in your pocket?

[Hannah]

And Mitchell's worked with me before against his will. And my nerve is. Tick. Is touching my hair. Yeah. And he'll just be looking at me, fuming because he just spent seven hours on making my hair perfect. He can't. He's a perfectionist. So. No, like, he. Me and him. Like, he can't with you.

[Paige]

There have only been a couple times where I've been like, mitchell.

[Hannah]

I'm gonna.

[Paige]

Freaking lose my mind if you touch my head one more.

[Hannah]

But I love how he's like, I don't give a fuck if you have panic attack. Flip your hair. Because if you're kind of a panic attack, it better look volume.

[Paige]

It's like, no one has sympathy for your panic attack because your hair looks like shit.

[Hannah]

It is crazy, though, because when I did my first found appearance doing standup, which is a whole nother monster, I mean, I was. I couldn't have been more nervous, like, before the curtain.

[Paige]

Okay, so you know how the guy's like, okay, and they're gonna announce your name?

[Hannah]

He's so chill.

[Paige]

He's like, and then I'm gonna whip the curtain up, and then you're just gonna go. He was giving me that spiel, and in my head, I, like, was trying to telepathically say to him, I'm gonna have like. I was like, no. And I was trying to explain it to other people. I was like, you don't understand. When I do it with Hannah, she walks first, she talks first. Then I have a second to give myself. Like, okay, and we're here and we're doing it. But I didn't have to talk first. I was like, but no, she's not here, so I have to walk.

[Hannah]

How does someone start a sentence? How do you put words together again?

[Paige]

No.

[Hannah]

We are so comfortable together.

[Paige]

That's literally me backstage. I'm like, I don't remember English.

[Hannah]

Just.

[Paige]

I can only.

[Hannah]

Only speak Spanish. You only know Spanish. All your high school classes, you're like, oh, yo, caprendo. No, I'm gonna. I saw the clip. You look so relaxed and, like, effortless. Thank you.

[Paige]

Well, that is my. My new thing now is, like, if I do something, then. And it's over. Everyone's like, no one could even tell that you're freaking out. Like, that's how people congratulate me. They're like, no one even knows that you're a fucking wreck.

[Hannah]

You know, one of my Ryder cup interviews, like, there's something about going live that's really scary. And I was like, totally chill. But it was like 5am I don't know. The men were yelling, and it goes live. And I realized my hand is shaking. And after it, I was like, my hand was shaking. That's so embarrassing. Then I watched it. You can't see my hand shaking.

[Paige]

No. I've had an itwitch for 3 months.

[Podcast Host]

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[Hannah]

Every find has a story. Like if you're looking for a vintage band tee. Not just a tee, the band tee. You wore it everywhere until your ex, girlfriend, boyfriend, best friend stole it. But now you're on ebay and there it is. Same tee from the same tour. The things you love have a way of finding their way back to you. Especially on ebay. Where else can you find that mint trading card you've been searching everywhere for that's out of print? Or your first car, the one you wish you never sold. It has to be on ebay. Shop ebay for millions of finds, each with a story. EBay things. Things people love.

[Podcast Host]

Okay, wait. What if you could bleach and color and heat style your hair and it won't break off? Like no straw ends, no frizz halo, just soft, strong, bouncy Hair, no matter what you do to it. Well, you need K18 leave in molecular repair hair mask. It doesn't just cover up damage. It actually repairs really deep, like molecular level deep. Their patented K18 peptide is like a tiny superhero that travels to and repairs your hair's innermost layers. So keep coloring, bleaching, using heat, living your best chaotic hair life. And K18's like, I got you. You can grab it at Sephora or get 10 off your first [e-mail] with code giggly. That's code [e-mail].

[Hannah]

Mental health moment. Another one. I'm on my today. Yeah. Because I have glasses on. I'm so therapist. In order to fall asleep, you first have to pretend you're sleeping. Chris is confused, honestly.

[Paige]

And it sounds like waves outside.

[Hannah]

No, think about it. In order to sleep, you first have to pretend you're sleeping.

[Paige]

You have to read through the lines. Chris. Anything you want in life, you have to pretend that you already have it.

[Hannah]

So when you're going out to do something that's scary, you first have to pretend you've already done it. You're not scared. You've already done it. It. So everyone take that with you for the rest of the week. By the way, the girls are chugging their refreshers. I keep getting dms. I'm drinking my mango pineapple, less concentrate, green tea, and it's so good. What about you?

[Paige]

I now pick my refresher based on my outfit. So I'm doing my blueberry, but it's a little more concentrated because I was wearing a darker color.

[Hannah]

And I love that for you. I know you know exactly how many. How much concentrate. You need to hit the burgundy level. You want. I have some, like, celebrity tea, so I've been, like, texting around. Cause look, when someone comes out with a new face, I'm on it.

[Paige]

Wait, I know whose face you're talking about.

[Hannah]

I don't want to name any names right now because we protect identities and women on this pod, but Emma Stone.

[Paige]

Okay.

[Hannah]

Emma Stone is my North Star. Yeah. So some celebrities, apparently, they're just doing really good face tape. And it could be a lie, and I could be spreading a lie, and this could be propaganda, but I think that some looks like they are just snatching their whole face back with face tape. And it's like the technology's gotten better where it doesn't look. I mean, Dochi just does it.

[Paige]

I was just gonna say she does it and, like, wears it.

[Hannah]

Yeah. But I think that there's subtle ones that, like, the. The human eye can't see.

[Paige]

I would understand that, because there are some times where I'm like, this look needs a ponytail because I need my face snatched back. It's just like, I'll do it to myself.

[Hannah]

Yeah. So I think. Or, like, if you have a wig, it's easy to just throw on some face tape.

[Paige]

I also think that women that are, like, I would say, what? Emma Stone's probably only like, a couple years older than us, right? Like, maybe she's like, 36, 37. I think that women are doing baby. Baby facelifts.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Paige]

And they're foregoing, like, a bunch of Botox and fillers and all of, like, that stuff, and they're just doing a simple incish pulse.

[Hannah]

Mm. Well, I do have to say, the Gen Z's, I feel so bad that they. They're almost like rice mice experiments for filler. And they were just like, oh, like, let's put some filler. It's cute. And then, like, the millennials.

[Paige]

I hate to blame a woman. I hate to blame a woman. But all of these Gen Z women who have succumb to plastic surgery, all that really tells me is that they don't have scary moms. None of their moms are terrifying. And it shows because you're telling me you can come home with a new face. I would get literally eviscerated. My mom knew when I spent one extra minute in the tanning bed, oh, my God. She's like, you ruined your gorgeous face. You ruined it. You ruined it. You're done. You ruined. Like, if I went and got my eyebrows waxed a little too thin. Thin. She would be like, you're. You're done.

[Hannah]

You're done.

[Paige]

You're done in this town.

[Hannah]

You've never dyed your hair.

[Paige]

I've never dyed my hair. The fear of my mother has honestly saved me in so many different situations.

[Hannah]

Italian moms instill a fear in you. It's such a unique thing.

[Paige]

Like, I see our guilt. It's all.

[Hannah]

I told you once, my brother and I, he was. We were like, 18. My brother's like, I'm gonna smoke weed, but, like, I don't know how to do it. And, like, in the backyard or whatever, and we. When I say backyard, like, on the stoop. Yeah. And I was like, stop with all the drama. Like, let's just ask Mom. And he's like, are you out of your.

[Paige]

No one invites you to do drugs.

[Hannah]

Okay.

[Paige]

This is why you headed into the bathroom.

[Hannah]

I go, look you're like, lenor and I are tight. I'm like, let me. Let's just. Let me talk to her logically about this.

[Paige]

She's actually not going to be mad.

[Hannah]

I mean, you're 17. I'm like, let me just talk to her and figure this out. So I go, lenore, can I speak to you for a second? Wait, you literally. I swear to God, I go, can Daniel just smoke some weed? Like he's not doing heroin. Like, can you just smoke some weed? At the time, she was the principal of middle school in Brooklyn. She then explained to me how him smoking weed on the stoop. On the stoop or wherever with her knowledge would get her fired from her job. We would lose the house, and we'd all be living on the street. To which I went back to my brother and I said, talk didn't go well. We'd be on the streets if you smoked weed right now. So we'd be home.

[Paige]

Don't tell me, like a normal kitchen Covid high in the backyard. Like, why am I having this conversation?

[Hannah]

She's like, you now? Ratting him out has now put me in trouble as a witness, you dumb bitch. Is what Lenore said to me. But by the way, Lenore texted me she wants to get another Chanel. Apparently, Teflon is causing issues nonstick pans. So she told everyone to get carbon steel because the non stick Teflon, apparently it also causes cancer. But that's what I woke up to last night.

[Paige]

No, my mom is Dr. Fauci. Like, literally all my Instagram messages from her are different things they've discovered for me to stay away from.

[Hannah]

That's why I don't understand most newscasters are men. Because my mom knows was what's going.

[Paige]

On way before I was like, yeah, Romaine shouldn't have been eating it.

[Hannah]

She knows when, like, there's a. A vegetable that's killing everyone.

[Paige]

Way before I sent you an Instagram on.

[Hannah]

She sends an Instagram. By the way, the AI is getting too realistic. Because at first I was like, mom, you dumb. It's AI Now I'm sending her AI.

[Paige]

The Jake Paul ones. Have you seen this?

[Hannah]

Oh, yeah. Apparently he was, like, behind it it because he invested in the company or something.

[Podcast Host]

Oh.

[Hannah]

Which again, they got us again.

[Paige]

Swindlers again.

[Hannah]

My thing is I keep seeing these, like, mansions in Italy because, you know, I like to manifest and I'll, like, send it to my mom or you. And it's like the craziest mansion. And my mom's like, it's AI, you stupid. So now my mom.

[Paige]

I haven't noticed that you've been doing that.

[Hannah]

I think maybe I sent you one.

[Paige]

I think I sent you a lot of cat AI. But it's like a very obviously cat AI coming out of an ice cream.

[Hannah]

Scoop was this cat AI of cats getting arrested. That is the funniest thing I've ever seen. Because the cops would go to a car and it's just a cat sitting in the driver's seat. And at first I was like, I didn't think it was AI because I'm like, that's something a cat would do.

[Paige]

The EDRM is working too well.

[Hannah]

We just started erpm.

[Paige]

No, the aarp. I need a hit of it right now.

[Hannah]

There are. I think it's a real thing where like a guy got arrested and a cat just came over and sat on him and fell asleep while he was lying down. Arrested. So like cats getting arrested is like. Like, I don't know. That's kind of my current passion right now. I have two Gen Z questions saying things that.

[Paige]

Your current passion right now is so funny.

[Podcast Host]

Sorry.

[Paige]

It's just like my current passion.

[Hannah]

Passion project. Grace and Chris are Jenzy's playing Flip cup. Oh, wait. I probably haven't played Flip cup in like three, four years. Okay, that was so sorry.

[Paige]

Wait, wait, wait. Break it down. Wait, break it down further. Are you guys.

[Hannah]

Let's break this down.

[Paige]

Let me get in this. Are you guys having pre games? Like, are pre games still a thing? Like, come to this apartment, drink, then we'll go out?

[Hannah]

Yeah. And no one's broken out of flip.

[Paige]

Cup battles during that time, so no one's competitive. You'll never get ahead in this world.

[Hannah]

So that's why the Gen Zs are not chasing their dreams anymore and the Gen Zs are not trying hard at things because you haven't played enough Flip cup.

[Paige]

Any beer? No games at all.

[Hannah]

I did play beer pong recently. So nice. It was awesome.

[Paige]

And you hadn't played in like, how long?

[Hannah]

Probably like four or five years. Okay. When I was 26, there were bars just for. For beer pong. Like, we'd go to the bar, put our name on a list, and like, we weren't there to drink. We were there to compete. We were there to like, live our dreams.

[Paige]

Jen. Also, I think drinking games promote binge drinking where, like, Gen Z isn't really binge drinking like that. Like, flip cup is like you're slamming the cup as fast as you can.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Paige]

Beer pong, like, you're slamming.

[Hannah]

Oh, well, there was that time. This is when the world started to turn for the worst. When it was 2015, when people started filling their beer pong cups with water and. And just drinking the beer. No, that's why Covid happened, because we didn't have the antibodies. The antibodies of when a ball rolls and gets kicked across the entire bar, and then you take it and you throw it in a beer and that person chugs it. That's why we were able to face, like, germs.

[Paige]

I think that was. Our generation started that, where they were like, actually just drink out of one cup and we're.

[Hannah]

What's the fun in that?

[Paige]

We started the demise of America also.

[Hannah]

The way we were able to handle pressure because of flip. Have you ever been the last person on a flip cup line after your team put their heart and soul into it? And then you. You feel the adrenaline and that team's catching up, and you're the one that's. That's messing it up. And then you start every. Actually, I talked about that in therapy in my edmr. That was one of my traumatic moments when I lost it for my team.

[Paige]

It's how I realized I like organized sports. Like, this team thing. You guys are onto something. The camaraderie you feel.

[Hannah]

Are your long fingers good or a deterrent when it comes to flip cup?

[Paige]

Oh, there's no. There's nowhere to go but winning.

[Hannah]

Yeah. Yeah. You're so good at those games. I have to say, when a guy's good at flip cup, I'm like, it's the hottest thing ever. When a guy's bad at flip cup, I'm like, you would finger my thigh.

[Paige]

Like I like in high school. There were so many things in high school and college that, like, you could get icked out by where, like, in your 30s, you're like, honestly, a dream. Like, but, like, in your 20s, if someone was playing beer pong and they weren't good at it, I'd be like, that's so embarrassing. I'm like, you probably, like, aren't good.

[Hannah]

At the father of my children.

[Paige]

I'm like, what? You're the loser of your friend group? And then in your 30s, like, do you ever realize you're dating the loser of a friend group? But you're so past, like, school days that you're like, it doesn't really matter, but in your head, it fully matters. Like, it's like, like, you could be dating a brother, and you, like, you meet the other brother and you're like, Fuck. I'm dating, like, the less hot younger brother.

[Hannah]

Yeah, yeah.

[Paige]

Sometimes in your 30s, you're like, wait, in college, I would have never even hung out with you.

[Hannah]

And.

[Paige]

And that's when you have to take inventory of where your life is at.

[Hannah]

Yeah, 100%. You know, but sometimes you're like. It was like when my mom, when she went to Cornell, she reminds me every day that. That they would lose all the football games, but they had a cheer that was like, that's all right. That's okay. We're gonna be your boss someday. So that's. Oop.

[Paige]

And that's changing.

[Hannah]

And that ate. Yeah, like, they ate with that. So it's like, yeah, maybe your guy wasn't the best at beer pong because he was studying. Because he was putting in work.

[Paige]

That's true.

[Hannah]

And I know you don't care for studying, Hugo.

[Paige]

Probably hideous.

[Hannah]

Also, Gen Z's. Do you find you don't say LOL at the end of your text messages?

[Paige]

Because, wait, I saw this recently that Gen Z's like, millennials stop using lol.

[Hannah]

I put lol. I'll literally be like, my grandma just fell and hurt her hip.

[Paige]

Lol. I write it in formal business emails. I'll be like, yeah, I'll get to it.

[Podcast Host]

Lol.

[Hannah]

If I don't put lol, it means I'm mad at you.

[Paige]

Oh, they know my tone.

[Hannah]

Yeah. Do you guys just. I do. I feel like I did it too. Like, I apologize. Yeah, well, Grace is kind of like, millennial coded. Chris. Well, Chris is a man. He doesn't. Yeah. Doesn't have to put lol.

[Paige]

Whoever, like, started that. You're stupid.

[Hannah]

Can I. Grace, can I tell the Butter story? Yeah, I have to. I have to tell you about Grace and Butter's weekend. So when I was gone, we had to move stuff from my apartment.

[Paige]

I knew that. You don't ever ask me to watch, but Butter.

[Hannah]

Well, today was a big day. Yeah. It was you. No.

[Paige]

Butter never acknowledges me. I've known her for almost 10 years. We've said hi twice.

[Hannah]

No, she'll hide from you.

[Paige]

This morning, Butter, like, looked me in the eye, acknowledged that I was alive, and even put her face, like, next to my finger, like, acknowledging it. And all Hannah could say is, like, she's really out of sorts. She's not acting like herself. Like, something's definitely wrong.

[Hannah]

So Butter, I think it's because I was gone for four days. She. I call it. She gets love starved, where she's like, I'll take love from anyone. At this point, she also just wanted to be with me. And even though you were there, she was like, I'll sacrifice this uncomfortable moment. So. But Butter doesn't like men. So we were having guys move everything out of our apartment into a different apartment. And Grace was kind of handling the job because I was in San Diego getting my ass beat in Pilates. And I told Grace, I said, the only thing I want you to do is just keep track of Butter because she's shifty. She's going to be really scared. Just make sure she's okay.

[Paige]

She's a street cat.

[Hannah]

She's a street cat? Yeah. She's going to finagle. Finagle. She's throwing dice.

[Paige]

Literally. Why do I picture her running an underground poker game?

[Hannah]

100%. So I'm, like, getting on a plane, and I get a call from Grace. And Grace always has, like, a very calm voice, but she's like, hey. So the move went great. Can't find Butter. And I'm like, the good news is.

[Paige]

Your TV made it.

[Hannah]

Your toiletries.

[Paige]

I made sure that everything's there.

[Hannah]

Small problem. And I go to. That's okay. I knew this was gonna happen. This is what cats do. They find a way to hide. And she goes, hannah. Like, everything's moved out of the apartment. There's nowhere for her to hide. Like, I've. I opened the fridge. Like, I've looked everywhere. She's not there. And I'm like, just give it a beat. She'll come out. An hour later, she calls. She goes, hey.

[Paige]

Still not.

[Hannah]

Still not there. So then I actually am like, okay. Did she hide in a box? In a box? And, like, some stuff was going in storage. So I'm like, is Butter in the storage unit? And then I'm like, did these guys. Guys chuck the luggage? And Butter's, like, in a. Luggage in.

[Paige]

She's in a moving truck.

[Hannah]

Butter's in Europe right now. Like, who knows where she is?

[Paige]

So then Butter's on her way to Rikers Island. She has no idea the terrain.

[Hannah]

Oh, my God.

[Paige]

So I'm like.

[Hannah]

And Grace is feeling so guilty because I gave her one note. Note? Yeah. I said the one note is, butter will deceive.

[Paige]

I don't give a fuck about any of my stuff.

[Hannah]

Break everything. Butter will deceive. She will fraud. She will do anything. You have to keep an eye on her.

[Paige]

No. Butter's like a really rich, like, child drug addict. It's like, no. She will go in your Louis Vuitton and take out your change.

[Hannah]

She will look you in the eye and lie to your face. Do not trust her. And Grace is innocent. Grace just thinks. But Butter was hiding under the couch, and she just assumed that Butter would stay there. Yeah, that. No, no, Butter's not staying under the couch. This isn't. Butter's playing chess. She's playing checkers. So Butter. Who knows where Butter was. But it's one of those things with cats where, like, they always just kind of appear out of nowhere. But this is the thing. Like, Grace looked in every crevice.

[Paige]

I feel like all cats have one hiding spot that they're like, and you'll never find me.

[Hannah]

Nobody's gonna get me.

[Paige]

Like, when I can't find Daphne, I'm like, I know she's in the house just because no one's been home. No one's let her out. And so I'll scream her name. And she always appears in the same spot in the hallway, just looking at me.

[Hannah]

But you don't know where she came from.

[Paige]

Wait, where did you come from? Because I've looked everywhere.

[Hannah]

A cat hiding to the extent Butter did when there's no furniture in the apartment is another level of. Was she underground?

[Paige]

Like, it makes you think that Butter also hosts, like, a true crime podcast that we have no idea about.

[Hannah]

The Secret Life of Pets was written by Butter. So I'm actually at the point where I'm, like, a little nervous because these men, they don't care about my cat, and Butter probably hid in something. I don't know. So I'm on the plane, also, like, sleep deprived, and I'm like, this is the end. Like, we lost Butter. And, like, and. And how is my relationship with Grace ever gonna be able to bounce back? Bounce back?

[Paige]

Cause, like, you'll know. She'll know.

[Hannah]

Yeah. And I'm. Obviously, Grace and I are really close, but she might start hanging out with you more. And I just didn't know how that would change that. The pod would have to.

[Paige]

Well, because we had cats. And it's like, you wouldn't get it. Cause you don't have a cat.

[Hannah]

No Giggly Squad. I was literally like, how do we announce the Gigglers that giggly squad's over? Cause, like, the feng shui is messed up. And I would just talk about Butter being stuck, sent to Bikers island every single day. So I actually, for a point, like, I was looking at my mom. My mom's, like, giving the. Like, it's going to be fine. But I can tell even my mom's nervous.

[Paige]

Yeah, you're like, this Is not good, Mom.

[Hannah]

This is not good. I get a photo. I get a photo from Grace. The apartment's vacant, and Butter's just standing in the middle of the apartment.

[Paige]

Like, no. Grace calls and she goes, I see another day. Grace.

[Hannah]

Actually. Yeah.

[Paige]

But it's like, your health insurance will be received this month. You are not fired.

[Hannah]

And we're gonna put the photo in the newsletter because it's the funniest photo I've ever seen. Grace told me that she was so upset. She was. Like, she thought she was dry heaving. Like, she thought she lost my cat.

[Paige]

Well, because there's no fear. I mean, obviously people have children, but there's no fear. Like, losing your animal. About that kid. I don't even know that kid yet. My cat has lived with me numerous times, but there's.

[Hannah]

So I have to find one of these memes where it's like, everyone freaking out that they lost the cat, and then the cat just walks out of nowhere, like, so calm. So anyway, we had a scare. Yeah, we had a scare. But Butter's okay. Butter. We still don't know where she hid, but that's none of our business.

[Paige]

How do you think she's gonna do, like, in general with the move?

[Hannah]

Like, do you think.

[Paige]

Do you think she's excited for a new spot? Do you think she's.

[Hannah]

She's not excited. Okay.

[Paige]

Okay.

[Hannah]

Also, Butter, by the way, like, we'll go to West Hampton. And she's like, I want my, like, one bedroom in New York City. Like, that's my vibe. She's like, I don't. Like, what is this lawn?

[Paige]

It's so funny because if I take Daphne somewhere for, like, even like, a night or two nights, and then we come back to my apartment, she inspects it as if, like, she's never seen it before. She's never been there before. She's like, let me see.

[Hannah]

Yes.

[Paige]

That is where I left things. Okay. Actually, this is our home. Home. Yeah.

[Hannah]

Some cats are really good with, like, change and stuff, and Butter just isn't one of them. Yeah. But again, like my therapist said she.

[Paige]

Should do, I was just.

[Hannah]

Butter has boundaries.

[Paige]

Butter needs some edmr. Because there's obviously some traumatic points where she's like, she goes back to you. She's like, I can't go out from under the bed.

[Hannah]

Butter and I have been through a lot. We've. Butter's been through, like, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5. How many men? Like, so many apartments actually. Butter iconic. She hates all the men I would bring home back in my day. And once I was, like, lying in bed with this random man, and she just ran across the bed, like, across our chest. Scared the shit out of him. Cause I wasn't. I didn't explain. I have a cat. We weren't that deep at that point, and I wasn't gonna explain. A cat that he was never gonna see. Right. He thought, like, a large rat kind of ran across our bed.

[Paige]

He's in New York City. Who knew?

[Hannah]

Who knew? Who knew? So anyway, I think she'll be okay, though. Cause I'm bringing her rug, which she loves.

[Podcast Host]

Perfect.

[Hannah]

She also. This is so buttercoated. There's a bag that she is her best friend. Yeah, it's this, like, black bag that she rolls around on. And people, like, will try to throw it away. Like, my mom will come in and be like, let's throw away this trash. And I said, that's Butter's best friend.

[Paige]

Sorry. That's Butter's bag.

[Hannah]

So she butter butter on her. As long as she has her bag, it's like her emotional support bag. She lies on it. She tries to strangle herself with it.

[Paige]

Butter.

[Podcast Host]

I have purse.

[Hannah]

Butter have purse. So as long as she has her bag, she'll be okay.

[Paige]

Wait, that's so page coated of Butter.

[Hannah]

Actually, that's very you.

[Paige]

She's like, sorry, where's my bag?

[Hannah]

As long as you have a little bag that you can't even fit anything in, you're happy. You're happy?

[Podcast Host]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Oh, goodness gracious. Anyway, you guys, I am gonna be in Madison, Wisconsin. Go Badgers. I'm going back.

[Paige]

Wow.

[Hannah]

Yeah. And Green Bay and Portland, Maine, and all next week. In two weeks.

[Paige]

Okay.

[Hannah]

Yeah, yeah.

[Paige]

I'm taking it easy this week.

[Hannah]

That's what you always say.

[Paige]

Yeah, I'm just gonna. I'm just gonna do zooms from home.

[Hannah]

You're not doing your 10k steps.

[Paige]

Oh, yeah, don't bring it up.

[Hannah]

It's raining, though. You can't do it in the rain. You have a walking pad for that. Guys, thank you for giggling with us. We love you so much. And we'll talk to you later. And thank you to Dunkin for sponsoring this episode. We love you and your refreshers on ebay. Every find has a story. Like, if you're looking for a vintage band tee. Not just a tee, the band tee. You wore it everywhere until your ex, girlfriend, boyfriend, best friend stole it. But now you're on ebay, and there it is. Same tea from the same tour. The things you love have a way of finding their way back to you, especially on ebay. Where else can you find that mint trading card you've been searching everywhere for? That's out of print. Or your first car, the one you wish you never sold. It has to be on ebay. Shop ebay for millions of finds, each with a story. Ebay. Things people love.