Giggling about prophets, perfume, and gatekeeping

Summary

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Giggly Squad — “Giggling about prophets, perfume, and gatekeeping”

Hosts: Hannah Berner & Paige DeSorbo
Date: April 21, 2026

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Episode Overview

This episode of Giggly Squad is classic Paige and Hannah: playful, self-deprecating, and pop culture-obsessed, but with a sharp eye for modern trends and group psychology. The girls spiral from discussions about signature scents and Burberry perfume, to the merits of gatekeeping and Hailey Bieber's beauty trends, all the way to deep dives on cult documentaries, ‘Girls’ nostalgia, the eternal bond with their mothers, and the science of being a little bit extra, everywhere you go. Equal parts giggle-fest and slyly insightful, it’s an episode for lovers of cozy chaos, cult realness, and the hot takes only the Giggly Squad can deliver.

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Key Subjects & Discussion Points

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1. Gatekeeping Culture: Is It Making a Comeback?

[03:13–05:50]

• On sharing beauty secrets: Dez (Paige) relays a moment of accidental "gatekeeping" over her nail color—she simply didn’t know the shade, leading to a conversation about whether it’s best to keep certain finds secret.
• La Roach’s take: “La Roach said, bring gatekeeping back...if you’re telling everyone where the cheap shop in Japan is to get designer bags...it’s not cheap anymore. You’re ruining things because you’re not gatekeeping.” — Dez [03:36]
• The specialness of secrets: Hannah and Dez agree that keeping things to yourself can maintain their unique value.

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2. Vintage Fashion, Nails, and Hailey Bieber Trends

[05:36–07:27]

• Hailey Bieber’s “nails matching lips” trend is met with skepticism (“She’s just saying random shit to see what happens” — Dez).
• Paige admits to being brand loyal but not product loyal, except for a $38 lip product—Revival Skincare Youthful Lip.
• Candid digressions into vintage shopping and thrift culture in NYC, and the psychology of attaching identity to fashion.

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3. The Mental Load of Adulthood and the Never-Ending To-Do List

[06:35–08:34]

• Confessions about not being able to truly relax, the omnipresent checklist in their heads, and comparing adulthood to their mothers’ perpetual motion.
• “I've hit the age where when I'm sitting on the couch, I can’t even relax—because I could do ten things to get ahead for the week.” — Hannah [06:58]
• Hilarious takes on couch etiquette (“If I want to sit normally on a couch, I get a chair.” — Dez [08:34])

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4. Grocery Delivery and Straight Men’s Produce Literacy

[09:08–11:11]

• The pitfalls of using Instacart, especially when only matched with men who “don’t know what raspberries are.”
• “There are 5 million packages of raspberries!” — Hannah [10:53]
• Tangent on how men mistake clementines for grapefruits and a nostalgia riff on pomegranates and ‘90s childhoods.

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5. Girlhood Nostalgia, Gen Z, and Tween Trends

[12:10–14:42]

• Gen Z’s attempt to replicate “malls” and Y2K trends (full Juicy tracksuits), and the cyclical nature of fashion.
• The one “gripe” with 12-year-olds: long, fake nails—though they agree it’s mostly jealousy from denied childhoods.
• Digression into ADHD productivity hacks: “They say if you have ADHD, you should wear shoes in the house because you’re more productive.” — Hannah [15:01]

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6. Netflix Cult Doc Deep Dive: FLDS and the Nature of Brainwashing

[16:19–27:37]

• Dez recaps a true crime cult documentary on a splinter group of FLDS (Fundamentalist Mormons) and what makes group brainwashing tick.
• “If you're born and at like three years old, when you first start having your first memories and someone's like, you've been chosen, like, what else are you supposed to believe?” — Hannah [18:04]
• The psychology of obedience, cult life, and how collective trauma bonds women together.
• Connection drawn between reality TV dating shows and the psychology of polygamous cults: “It was giving The Bachelor, where the girls want him but have never even spoken to him.” — Dez [27:42]

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7. Mothers as Life Managers

[32:13–34:32]

• Heartfelt and hilarious reflection on the irreplaceable practicality of moms in adult daughters’ lives.
• “At the end of the day, the two people making the decisions are me and my mom... sometimes we say to my dad: you can excuse yourself.” — Hannah [32:55]

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8. The Protein Craze, Milk Wars, and Digestive Tales

[57:50–61:33]

• A passionate debate on the state of milk—oat, almond, lactaid, and cow—and a dig at “the nut girls.”
• “All the other ones taste like shit. I said it.” — Dez [58:26]
• Critique of the protein fad: “Why are you coming up with the most insane situations for protein when you could literally eat one chicken cutlet?” — Hannah [58:53]
• Bowel movement mishaps triggered by a whole milk latte—both mortifying and cleansing!

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9. Skincare and Scent: Perfume as Social Currency

[61:33–65:15]

• Riff on how “expensive creams always smell like molded foot” and the delicate balance between skincare efficacy and personal comfort.
• The issue of over-perfumers: “I'm getting high...like, you ever smell someone’s cologne and it’s just too much?” — Dez [63:17]
• Paige’s top perfume recommendations: Khloe Kardashian’s scent, Prada Paradox, Victoria Beckham’s Positano—measured by the “number of compliments per spray.” [63:54]
• The romantic perils of falling for a scent, not a person: “You realize you don’t like him, you like his cologne.” — Dez [65:04]

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10. Productivity, Social Zooms, and Doing the Bare Minimum

[51:08–53:46]

• Both confess to the art of “strategic lateness” to Zoom calls to avoid small talk.
• “I'm consistently too much... you come on the Zoom as if you were rushing from something else.” — Dez [53:37]

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On gatekeeping: “If everyone knows about something, it’s not special anymore.” — Dez [04:01]
• On groupthink and cults: “If I can just stay with him, I am going to heaven. And that's what they tell the Bachelor contestants—they're like, keep another episode, you get a million followers.” — Dez [28:49]
• On perfume addiction: “I get overstimulated with perfume. I can't be smelling something while I'm existing.” — Dez [63:07]
• On mothers: “She’s not just my mother. She’s the head of operations of my life.” — Dez [34:20]

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Episode Timestamps — Highlights

• 03:36: Gatekeeping, La Roach’s hot take
• 06:35: Adulting and productivity guilt
• 09:15: Grocery delivery and produce problems
• 12:10: Generational nostalgia and mall culture
• 14:42: ADHD hacks and airport fashion fails
• 16:19: Cult documentary analysis
• 27:42: FLDS and reality-show psychology
• 32:13: Moms as life managers
• 58:26: Cow milk, nut milk, and protein madness
• 61:33: Skincare, perfume, and scent philosophy
• 51:56/53:37: The secret art of Zoom lateness

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Tone & Vibe

Breezy, irreverent, and deeply relatable — Paige and Hannah weave self-aware chaos with sharp insight. The jokes flow naturally, as do sidebars on digestive woes and existential musings about nail polish and sisterhood. Whether riffing on mall nostalgia, Netflix documentaries, or perfume-induced crushes, they maintain a candid, witty tone that never lets you forget: this is a safe (and slightly unhinged) space to giggle about anything.

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Summary by Giggly Squad Summarizer | April 2026

Transcript

[Paige]

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[Hannah]

Gary, fix the WI fi manifest that

[Dez]

we can't be managed.

[Hannah]

I mean, the day just got away from me.

[Dez]

Hello, my Galapagos Gigglers. That's a. That's a place not in America.

[Hannah]

Because it's cold out.

[Dez]

It's cold out.

[Hannah]

What is this like Entertainment Tonight. Why are we both in like wool blazers?

[Dez]

Why do we wear the cdc?

[Hannah]

What is the cdc?

[Dez]

Cdc. What is that again? I think it's really like a Covid thing.

[Hannah]

Yeah, Something

[Dez]

women in stem of the week is us showing up in our blazers.

[Hannah]

Your nails look good.

[Dez]

Oh, my God, thank you. Someone stopped me in the line at the airport yesterday and said, what color nails? And I said, sorry, my friend Paige just told me to get them.

[Hannah]

Oh, did you do the exact same thing? Yeah.

[Dez]

What color is it?

[Hannah]

I don't know. He mixes it and then I felt

[Dez]

like I was gatekeeping her. She's like, what color? Like, gun to my head, she's like, what color is that? And I'm like, I swear to God, I don't know.

[Hannah]

Which is so interesting when girls will like, ask that because I'm like, the bottles are all not labeled. Like, my guy one swipe and then does another swipe and he's like, do you like that? And I'm like, pinker. And then he writes down what he. He combined it.

[Dez]

They're doing full chemistry things. Also, La Roach said, bring gatekeeping back. And his argument was like, if you are all telling people where the cheap shop in Japan is to get designer bags, guess what? It's not cheap anymore. He's basically like, you guys are ruining things because you're not gatekeeping.

[Hannah]

No. And I kind of respect that.

[Dez]

Which I respect too. I. At some point, if everyone knows about something, it's not special anymore.

[Hannah]

Trying to think if there's anything I gatekeep. Well, all my feelings.

[Dez]

I'm your therapist. The person is like, please just tell me what you're actually thinking.

[Hannah]

I'm like, bunny gas, figure it out.

[Dez]

Isn't that your job? Aren't you professional?

[Hannah]

Like, why don't you pinpoint it if

[Dez]

I'm just gonna tell you what I'm feeling? I feel like you're not doing your job.

[Hannah]

What's the point?

[Dez]

Also with nails, Hailey Bieber announced the new trend, which is she likes her nails matching her lips. I think she's fucking with us at this point. I think she's just like saying random shit to see. What?

[Hannah]

I think she saw my into the Gloss article and said that I like when my nails match my toes.

[Dez]

Wait, did you. Oh, yeah, 100%.

[Hannah]

Can we go back to the gatekeeping thing for a second? I feel like you low key have a lot of things that you gatekeep. Like you never. What products do you put in the newsletter? I never look at your products.

[Dez]

I know this is insane to you? Yeah. I don't use products

[Hannah]

like. What's that. What's that chapstick that you're like, I'll die.

[Dez]

Oh, I talk about it everywhere. What's it called again? Revival Skincare. Youthful lip. That's $38.

[Hannah]

Is there any product that you've. That you're like, I've been using this since college. Other than, like, Dove deodorant.

[Dez]

No.

[Hannah]

No.

[Dez]

I don't attach myself to products. That's so true. I don't.

[Hannah]

You don't attach yourself to big brands?

[Dez]

Yeah. No. 100% do. 100% do. But I don't define myself through capitalism.

[Paige]

Right.

[Dez]

I do Gatekeep. There's one, like, online vintage shop that has really good stuff.

[Hannah]

Do you ever go to that big vintage. Like, they have it every year in New York. I think it was actually literally last weekend that I would love to.

[Dez]

I wasn't around.

[Hannah]

They have like, a big. What's it called? Like, a bazaar. Like, it's where, like, all these different vintage places go to one location and you can, like, shop through it. We should go one year. I don't know why we never go.

[Dez]

Well, vintage markets have been going on. You've. You've just been.

[Hannah]

Okay.

[Dez]

You just been.

[Hannah]

I've just been living in the here and now. I've been in the here and now.

[Dez]

I actually tried on something vintage recently, and I thought in my head, I'm like, who else wore this?

[Hannah]

My jacket's vintage. It was my mom, so I know who wore it.

[Dez]

Iconic.

[Hannah]

And she's always like, why do you always wear that jacket? I hate it.

[Dez]

Oh.

[Hannah]

But I'm like, I love it.

[Dez]

Be like, kim, look in the mirror.

[Hannah]

This is gorgeous. And it was, like, deceiving this morning.

[Dez]

Oh, the weather.

[Hannah]

It was really nice out and, like, springy, but it's cold.

[Dez]

Are we both really tired?

[Hannah]

I got a full eight, but, yeah,

[Dez]

that doesn't mean anything. Actually. I got.

[Hannah]

I got 12,000 steps in my own home yesterday.

[Dez]

See, that's weird. I worry about you.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Dez]

Were you, like, pacing on phone calls? Were you on a walking pad?

[Hannah]

Nope. Just walking around doing different stuff. Well, I went for a walk in the morning, so that.

[Dez]

That helped.

[Hannah]

That kicked like, 4,000. Then throughout the day, I was like, I could be doing more things. I've hit the age. This actually makes me want to die. I've hit the age. I've hit the age where when you're sitting on the couch, you. You can't even relax. And especially on a Sunday. Because you're like, I could do 10 things to get me ahead for the next week. Stressful. And it's really. It's actually. I now get our moms, like, remember,

[Dez]

we'll watch TV standing up.

[Hannah]

Yeah. Remember when you were little where you would be like, just sit down and like, can we watch this? They're like, I have 8 million things to do.

[Dez]

They're like, we're dealing with income tax microplastics. There's a lot going on that you don't see.

[Hannah]

I'm dealing with microplastics a lot more than I should be.

[Dez]

But that's dez, which, like, it annoys me, but it's good for my mental health. Where if we watch two episodes in a row, he'll look at me and go, okay, we need a little break. And I go, break. Two episodes. Two break.

[Hannah]

I haven't even finished my snack.

[Dez]

He's like, we should do a walk around the block something. I go, break. No lock in, motherfucker. Yeah, so he, like. He's like that. Where he's like, sorry, I just can't sit for too long. Like, I'll watch TV lying down and. And he'll just be sitting up watching it.

[Hannah]

I'll lay for so long that I literally. My hip starts to hurt. No.

[Dez]

All I lower back is. Cause when I'm watching something, I'm in a contorted laying down pose.

[Hannah]

Truly.

[Dez]

And butter's lying on me in a weird position, so I have to hold it or she'll move.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Dez]

But anyone who watches multiple episodes of tv, like, binges just, like, sitting up on their couch is crazy.

[Hannah]

I've never sat on a couch.

[Dez]

I've never sat normally on a couch.

[Hannah]

Me neither.

[Dez]

If I want to sit normally on a couch, I get a chair.

[Hannah]

I don't even have chairs in my living room because I think it's inappropriate.

[Dez]

It's abusive.

[Hannah]

Like, don't come over and think you're better than me and sit in a chair in my living room. Get a blankie and be a real human.

[Dez]

Have you ever seen those Instagrams that are like, what kind of person are you? If you walk into a room, which chair would you sit in? Yeah, I love that. That's like. I'm like, this is my hobby. Where would I sit?

[Hannah]

You and lambs. That's literally just you and lamps.

[Dez]

Okay.

[Hannah]

You want to know gripe? I have.

[Dez]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Do you ever go.

[Dez]

Do you ever sit and share? Do you ever go to the grocery store?

[Paige]

No.

[Hannah]

Right. It's obsolete. It's not a thing that humans do anymore.

[Dez]

Do I say every week I'm gonna go to the grocery store? Yes.

[Hannah]

Do you pop in maybe because, like, you're passing one and you're really thirsty or, like, you need one thing and it's right there, but I'm not going. Here's the other thing. It's New York City, so you can't actually go to the grocery store and do, like, a big haul because you can't physically car at home. So I feel like when I. Even when I first moved to New York. Actually, when I first moved to New York, there was a grocery store under my apartment, which was amazing. I didn't realize how spoiled I was. And you could go and do your grocery shopping, and they would bring it up for you.

[Dez]

I remember that there was. It was, like, a thing you could do, and you'd have to pay extra for the.

[Hannah]

It was called Jubilee Market, and I loved it so much.

[Dez]

Shout out to Jubilee. We love your work.

[Hannah]

It was so nice. But now with Instacart, like, you can do a whole big order, whatever. I find myself having to do two separate orders from two different places, because, first of all, I only ever get matched with a man ever on Instacart or, like, Uber Eats.

[Dez]

That's the universe having fun.

[Hannah]

Like, lucky day. You'll get an Instacart, and it will be a woman. And you're like, they know where the produce is. Like, think, God. But seriously, there's no. Something should be done because you waste. I waste so much money just redoing the order. I'm like, I know for a fact they're actually not out of raspberries. Because every time I've ever gone into

[Dez]

the grocery store, straight men don't know what raspberries are.

[Hannah]

33 years.

[Dez]

Chris. Do you know what a raspberry is? What's that?

[Hannah]

There are 5 million packages of raspberries.

[Dez]

Raspberries, like, saying to a man, like, this is the color teal. Like, they just don't process it. They're like, it's strawberries or apples or oranges. They also don't know about clementines.

[Hannah]

Oh, they do not know about clementines. Like, the amount of times I've gotten a grapefruit. And I'm like, cool, this is not a fucking sumo orange. And now, look, I'm not a big chef, obviously, so I'm not ever buying for, like, oh, my God, I'm making a frittata, and I can't, like, no,

[Dez]

you saw a TikTok about Sumo oranges. And you wanted one.

[Hannah]

Hey, I could try and squeeze that so it's never like really messing up.

[Dez]

Have you ever had a pomegranate?

[Hannah]

Have you ever tried to take the seeds out of a pomegranate?

[Dez]

No, I did this when I was little once. It took me eight hours. It was the most fun I've ever had.

[Hannah]

It's one of the. You have to hit the thing, open

[Dez]

it, and then you have to spit out the seeds. But then at one point you just start eating them. Cause you're like, fuck it.

[Hannah]

No, you eat them.

[Dez]

I think at one point I was spitting them out because I thought they were gonna grow in my stomach.

[Hannah]

Oh, you thought you sucked on them and then spit them out? Yeah, but now I just buy them already like taken out of the thing. I love pomegranates at night.

[Dez]

I miss the fun. Now they just have palm juice. We used to have to. We have to grow it, pick it off the. Wherever it is, the tree.

[Hannah]

I saw a thing on the Internet that said if you were born between 1991 and 1999, you had the most picturesque childhood.

[Dez]

Are you crying right now?

[Hannah]

But I did.

[Dez]

I love your nostalgia.

[Hannah]

I think that's why our generation has a really hard time growing up.

[Dez]

Also I heard that Gen Z's are trying to do malls. Cause they wanna live what we lived. And it's like, the moment's over, babe. Also, I'm becoming a. You know, you just become the older people in your life.

[Hannah]

Cause you have a blazer on.

[Dez]

Yeah, yeah. I was at the airport yesterday and a young girl maybe like. I don't know, I can't tell after like unders. They could be nine, they could be 16. I can't tell. She must. No idea. She was like 12, 13 maybe.

[Hannah]

Okay.

[Dez]

Full juicy outfit. Yeah, I was like, we wore those when it first came out. But I should be happy.

[Hannah]

I should be like, well, things like come back around. By the way, the only gripe I have with 12 year olds.

[Dez]

Say it. Someone needs to call them out.

[Hannah]

Everyone's afraid and I don't want to. I'm not mom shaming. I'm not. The only thing sometimes I think is inappropriate is when little girls have long nails. Like long fake nails. Maybe that's just because my mom wouldn't let me and I'm jealous of those girls.

[Dez]

I think that's the least offensive thing a girl could do is have long nails. Let her have some art on her hands.

[Hannah]

Totally get your nails done. But I think long nails are a Very patriarchal.

[Dez]

No, but how are they typing?

[Hannah]

How are they typing? How are. I just think it looks to adult.

[Dez]

Well, a girl posted on Instagram, kind of like, why would your hands ever not be manicured? And she's getting eaten alive by girls. Full women in STEM who are like, with a Tahoe.

[Hannah]

Brain surgery. Yeah.

[Dez]

What's a Tahoe? Not Tahoe, Chris. What are those?

[Hannah]

A truck.

[Dez]

What are those? Backhoe.

[Hannah]

What the hell is Christina.

[Dez]

Tobacco is, like, for, like, gardening and stuff.

[Hannah]

Spell it. Or a backhoe.

[Dez]

Yeah, like a big backhoe.

[Hannah]

Like a. Like a construction thing.

[Dez]

Yes, Girls in construction.

[Hannah]

Got it, Got it.

[Dez]

Sorry. I really threw us all off on that one. Everyone was like, stop the pot. Oh, also, so I was in Miami. This is how my ADHD works in Miami. And the flight got delayed, so I was like, I'm going to do some cleaning. Because the only time I can clean is if I know I only have a short amount of time. I'm like, I have 30 minutes. Let's clean.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Dez]

Because if you have all morning, I love a challenge. So I'm like, let's go 30 minutes hard. Because then you're done.

[Hannah]

You are the person that's like, oh, my God, I have all day to get ready. I'm going to wait till 30 minutes so I can rush my favorite.

[Dez]

Because then you're actually productive. It's going to be stressed all day. So I'm like, okay, 30 minutes. Let's try to put some clothes away. And I put on my sandals.

[Hannah]

You know, they say if you have adhd, you should wear shoes in the house because you're more productive.

[Dez]

It's true. Is it? Yeah, it is true.

[Hannah]

I think a slipper, particularly laces, too.

[Dez]

Okay, yeah, maybe. But I was wearing these, like, these flip flops running around, which is essentially a slipper.

[Hannah]

But I digress.

[Dez]

I'm not gonna fight about those things. And then I'm like, okay, let's get to the airport. Get to the airport. By the way, I'm going to New York City. And I'm in a line, and someone checks my id and she gives me a look up and down, like, looks at my feet. And I'm like, that was weird. Look down. Still wearing my sandals. And I'm like, I'm at the airport in my sandals, going to New York. New York is 45 degrees. And I'm like. Like, this is the kind of stuff I do.

[Hannah]

Okay, so your whole story was about walking out of the house, like, in a slipper,

[Dez]

but it didn't occur to Me until, like, another woman looked me up and down and I was like.

[Hannah]

She was like, you're wearing your dogs

[Dez]

out on a plane.

[Hannah]

You've got more problems to worry about.

[Dez]

On the plane with my dogs out.

[Hannah]

Were they cold?

[Dez]

Actually, they were fine. Cause I run hot. But it was when I got to New York City that I'm, you know, you're stepping in puddles, which are Chernobyl. So I have to check if I have gout on my toes. Now.

[Hannah]

I saw that you watched the Netflix documentary that you were like, I'm not watching.

[Dez]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

What did you think?

[Dez]

Well, I fought against it for a second.

[Hannah]

Well, it's because, like, if you've seen one, you've seen them all. It's all like, it's the same guy.

[Dez]

I have so much to say. First of all, I want to apologize. Whenever I watch documentaries, I just say what it's about. I don't say the actual title because I watch Too many people are like, that's not the title. It's like False Prophet something. It's number one on Netflix right now. You can't miss it.

[Hannah]

Truth Something.

[Dez]

Truth of something.

[Hannah]

Truth in something.

[Dez]

White Salamander. So we have a Mormon Giggler correspondent. We do, yeah. She tagged me and she's like, please, please, please do not just say Mormon. This is a L, D S L, C, D s. Oh, the LFT. Lfsd. I think that was actually really close.sd lsdstd lfsd69.well.com.

[Hannah]

this is the San Diego.

[Dez]

Sorry, my mom is here. Latter Day Saints.

[Hannah]

LD but isn't in the documentary. They're like a more extreme version.

[Dez]

They're basically like. They're basically like Mormons don't even. Aren't even religious.

[Hannah]

Yeah, they're like, Mormons are whores is what they're like. No, they're like those sanctimonious.

[Dez]

The made up. They don't even go to fucking church. These are the real ones. And it was funny. The girl even, she was like, we are celebrities in our own right because we're the only ones that are actually close to God. And they know everyone looks at them weird, but they love it. And you know what?

[Hannah]

Flds.

[Dez]

Flds. This is my thing. I have empathy for all of them because I'm like, find a purpose, babe. Like, the girls are there and they

[Hannah]

are like, well, if you're born and at like three years old, when you first starting having your first memories and someone's like, you've been chosen, like, what else are you supposed to Believe that's all you know.

[Dez]

Also, it's not like, lackadaisical. They're like, you're gonna die in the burning depths of hell. Or you're gonna be like, having the time of your life in heaven. Pick a side. You pick it. You pick it. You could do whatever you want. Which one?

[Hannah]

They're like, we're giving you. We're telling you what's gonn. The craziest part too, is, like, when they had to go get regular clothes to get that guy from jail, they were like, I don't want to do this. I don't want to wear this. I don't want to be look normal at all. It's sad.

[Dez]

Brainwashing is real. But I didn't want to watch it because I was like, I've seen this. A crazy man convinces all the women to have sex with him. How many times have I nickel? But it's way more interesting than that because it's this quirky, quirky, quirky fun lady. Who I wanna be, by the way.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Dez]

Who lived this crazy life in Hollywood where she was a puppet. She did puppets. I missed that part. You were on your phone.

[Hannah]

She was a puppeteer.

[Dez]

Yeah, she did puppet.

[Hannah]

Like, she.

[Dez]

Where she's like, okay, I missed that far. She was like, miss California? I don't know. She's lived a crazy life. She's now with this like, hot foreign dude who does music videos. Like, she's having fun, but she decides to move to Colorado Creek.

[Hannah]

Well, she was a wife of one of these guys, so she kind of knew the brainwashing. And he did, like, really crazy things to her.

[Dez]

Well, yeah. At first I was like, why does she suddenly feel compelled to live there? And she's like, I was a victim of a religious culture. And I totally get how like, that kind of sits with you. Like, you're like, I need to do something about this. Yeah. So she's at Colorado Creek and these people, like, she sticks out like a sore thumb. She's like this Barbie doll looking blonde with her husband who's like. Has a camera everywhere. And everyone's like, who the fuck are you? And it took her, like, months. They're also in the middle of no gorgeous backdrop, though. The. But it's like all polygamy, polygamy, polygamy, polygamous. And she gets in with this crew. Well, long story short, the Prophet. The Prophet was this guy, he died. His son went to jail. Well, his son decided I'm the prophet.

[Hannah]

Right, right.

[Dez]

Then, like, married, like all these 11 year olds. And they're like, you need to go to jail. And everyone was like, he's perfect. He never did anything wrong. You guys are lying about him. He's in jail. And everyone, like, doesn't know what to do. And when the guy's in jail, he tells them all they can't have babies or get married, which is giving. Jealous. Like, sorry, just because you're in jail doesn't mean.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Dez]

And also, everyone's related already, so it's like they're already struggling to, like, build the community, which. They didn't talk about that.

[Hannah]

I didn't think about that.

[Dez]

They didn't talk about that. There's only so many to work with.

[Hannah]

Wait, that's.

[Dez]

So all the kids have the same dad.

[Hannah]

Wait, I didn't even think of that. That. That is like. What's that called again?

[Dez]

Incest. Yeah, and that's a scientific term.

[Hannah]

Sorry, I'm not throwing incest.

[Dez]

That'll be in the title. But if you think about it, they told the Mormon wives they have to have a kid every year.

[Hannah]

Oh, my God.

[Dez]

No, no.

[Hannah]

You could die.

[Dez]

Yeah, the kids are just dropping out at this point.

[Hannah]

Wait, that's, like, really scary. Actually, one of my.

[Dez]

Traumatic for your body.

[Hannah]

Sorry. One of my close friends is, like, about to give birth. She could go at any moment. And this is the. This is my first friend that, like,

[Dez]

is having a real baby.

[Hannah]

Is having a real baby. Like, my first friend that I would call at 2am and be like, you have to pick me up is having a baby. So it's a lot. I got a new eye cream,

[Dez]

by the way. I just bought.

[Hannah]

She'll, like, tell her husband stories about when we were in our 20s and I'm like, wait, I feel 102.

[Dez]

By the way.

[Hannah]

That was last year.

[Dez]

When I get a facial, I'm always the person that they're like, you need to buy this cream. And they put a gun to your head. And I always feel bad, so I'll buy one of them. And then they're like, that was $700. Wait, I buy it. Do you not buy it?

[Hannah]

Wait, that's two type of people. That's so interesting when you get out and you're up at the counter and you're paying, and they're like, oh, she recommended this list for you.

[Dez]

Do you always say no?

[Hannah]

Yeah, always.

[Dez]

See, I feel like, because I didn't get a lot of facials and because I don't know what I'm doing. My face. It's like the one time a Person. Like a doctor would be like, we recommend this vitamin C, whatever. And they're always like, what are you using on your face? And I'm like, I don't fudge know, whatever.

[Hannah]

So salesy. So you don't realize it. Salesy.

[Dez]

And so I bought an insanely expensive cream, being like, well, this is going to change my life. I never use expensive creams. Yeah. Broke out.

[Hannah]

What was that?

[Dez]

I don't remember.

[Hannah]

It was just like, like, just like a moisturizer.

[Dez]

No, it was like a serum that

[Hannah]

you were supposed to use, like at night.

[Dez]

My thing is, if I'm going to pay that much for a serum, I better have perfect skin.

[Hannah]

Well, because you don't use a ton of stuff. Like, it's almost like your skin is brand new. Like, it's like, what is that? So I feel like if it's not broke, don't. You don't.

[Dez]

Don't fix it.

[Hannah]

Yeah. I can't wait to see what it was.

[Dez]

I have to. I like, totally forget.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Dez]

But anyway, so in the polygamy world, they're left with no leader and they're not allowed to do anything and they're all starting to go crazy. And then this literally, Joe Schmo, like, he wasn't even respect in the community. He didn't have money, which some of these Mormons have money, by the way. Like, they're loaded.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Dez]

He had no money because they have

[Hannah]

all these women working for them.

[Dez]

Yeah. They have a sweatshop going on. So he, this Joe Schmo disappears.

[Hannah]

The one thing I don't get.

[Dez]

Yeah, okay.

[Hannah]

I get the clothes aspect. Like, you want to be like, covered up and it's like, whatever.

[Dez]

They obey the men.

[Hannah]

I'm not. I don't understand the hairstyles.

[Dez]

I was gonna say it's kind of iconic. Like, I feel like if Hailey Bieber did it, everyone would be doing it. The wave. The wave.

[Hannah]

It's just like, how are you getting your hair like that? I think it's so many products and I can't get it to stand up.

[Dez]

Yeah. Cause you know they're not using Dysons.

[Hannah]

Yeah. Like what Hairspray. Are you thinking it?

[Dez]

But it doesn't look teased. It looks very smooth.

[Hannah]

Yeah. I'm like, how are you getting that whole swoop? And it looks all. No hair extensions, no hair.

[Dez]

I mean, their hair is gorgeous.

[Hannah]

This is so intrusive. But I wonder if they're allowed to shave.

[Dez]

Great question, great question, Great question. I'll have our Mormon correspondent.

[Hannah]

And if she doesn't feel comfortable.

[Dez]

She also. You don't have to care. But, like, their whole thing is about obeying men. So it's funny because you're watching these women and I'm looking at them, like, were they born like this? Like, is this them? Like, because they've been trained, like, they actually love obeying men and they love sitting back. And then you realize that they're brainwashed.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Dez]

And not to give away anything, but, like, at the end, when you see some of them after realizing they. That they were brainwashed, they're completely different people.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Dez]

They're. They're women who are. Have a purpose again, who, like, have opinions. The girl literally was like, every day I realize there's new things I can learn and be. And I'm like.

[Hannah]

She was like, there's new things that I love doing. What was it? She was like, dirt biking or something?

[Dez]

Yeah, she was dirt, like, doing, like, the most badass shit. She's like a surgeon, dj. She's doing crazy shit.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Dez]

So part of me was like, oh, maybe these are just. There are women that just want to obey to, like, Joe Schmo.

[Hannah]

But do you think there's any girls that are, like, really deep in it that have ever come across Giggly Squad? Cause I feel like one episode of Giggly Squad, they'd be like, I might be brainwashed.

[Dez]

You know what? I literally was like, get me in that villa.

[Hannah]

Yeah,

[Dez]

put me in that villa.

[Hannah]

I swear to God.

[Dez]

Cause there's something in me where, like, the second a man tells me what to do in any capacity, I reject it.

[Hannah]

You know what else people tell me?

[Dez]

And I also can smell a con

[Hannah]

man a mile away that you can. And you know what else people don't talk about is unless he's.

[Dez]

It takes me about seven months.

[Hannah]

And that's your CrossFit there.

[Dez]

And that's your.

[Hannah]

I'm, like, the only one who doesn't see it. I don't know if he is reading comprehension. You're like, it's fine. I'll read for him. It's fine. I'll spell it out for him.

[Dez]

If he has a jawline, I'm like, but this guy didn't even have a jawline.

[Hannah]

The thing that I don't think, like, they're obviously not allowed to talk about or they haven't in these documentaries is like, okay, you know the mom that was like, I was catching onto it, and then she went to the blonde woman and was like, you gotta help me. I have to get my kids out of this. I Feel like in some community communities, there has to be, like, a ring of women that are, like, really close with each other that know what's happening is fucked up. But they can't say, like, the bonds that the women must actually have because they don't realize how trauma bonded.

[Dez]

Well, they're so bonded. The sisterhood is beautiful. Like, that they have each other. And there's. It's funny, like, there's no jealousy. Cause I think they're all just like, we're all going to heaven together.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Dez]

And I mean, maybe there is some jealousy of, like, who's.

[Paige]

I don't know.

[Hannah]

But, like, couldn't they realize that this guy was obviously like. Like, sorry, this guy obviously isn't at, like, the normal IQ that, like, a person that age would be.

[Dez]

Do you know what?

[Hannah]

It was just having one conversation. I'd be like, okay, you have a fourth grade reading level for people who didn't watch.

[Dez]

It's literally this, like, very average man with like 15 girls around him at all times, ranging from like 10 years old to, like 30. And do you know what it was giving the Bachelor? It was giving the Bachelor where, like, do you know when the Bachelor season would always start? You never watch it, but it would always start where the guys. You're like, he's fine, whatever. And then by season three, the girls start becoming obsessed with. Cause, like, they never see him. When they do, he's picking another girl. It's all the psychology of, like, those girls want him. And then the guys on the Bachelor, their head must get so fucking big. Cause they're just sitting there with all these girls, like, pick me, pick me. And then in their head, they're like, if I get. I get picked. I get Instagram deals, I get all these things. So then it's like a full mental warfare because these girls are basically like, if I can just stay with him, I am going to heaven. And that's what they tell the Bachelor contestants. They're like, if you. If you keep another episode, you will get a million followers. So you just become. And then next thing you know, you're like, I need to be around him. I love him. He's actually amazing. And next thing you know, like, it takes time. And all these girls didn't want to be with him originally.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Dez]

But then they realize, like, it is

[Hannah]

kind of crazy how, like, dating shows, it's social experiments.

[Dez]

It's very.

[Hannah]

It's crazy how dating shows still are so watched and profitable when, like, everyone filming the show knows the end result is to, like, get followers to make money, to, like, live.

[Dez]

Also, the argument when people would be like, they're not there for love or, like, they're on the reality show to get famous. Yeah.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Dez]

Who's not. Who goes on a reality show to become a better person? Who's like, you know, it'd be good for my growth.

[Hannah]

Certainly not. People don't give us enough credit for. For leaving. For truly being like, actually, I don't want to be flds anymore. I want to wear my hair the way I.

[Dez]

That was you. That was you. I fortunately, was forced out. I was the girl. They were like, you're not behaving.

[Hannah]

Do you want to know what they knew early? That you're going to blow up the whole thing.

[Dez]

She is not listening to the leader.

[Hannah]

She's not here for love.

[Dez]

She's not here for love. No. But I wasn't listening to the leader. I was questioning how things were working. I was getting. I was talking back to the wrong people. And they were like, get her out. Get her out. Wait. Because basically, I was like, either follow me. I tried to take over. I was like, follow me. I know what's right. I have a feminist mentality of this. I'm going to empower the women. And they were like, get her the fuck out. Yeah, get her the fuck out. She's ruining the whole hierarchy that we built.

[Hannah]

Ruin the tour.

[Dez]

She's going to ruin the world tour.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Dez]

Wait, I'm obsessed. When you put it that way, it makes me feel good.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Dez]

The whole group setting, there's, like, one girl that's always on his lap, like, hanging off him.

[Hannah]

The one part for me that they. I wish they would dive into more. They should make more shows with people who are out of it. Like, I would like a documentary of, like, their lives now, their sleeping arrangements. I'm like, what do you mean? You're putting 10 girls in one bed. That doesn't even. They're not fitting. What are you talking about?

[Dez]

When. That's all you know, it's like my nana growing up, she was sleeping on the floor. That's all she knew, and she loved it. I guess that is.

[Hannah]

I guess that is true.

[Dez]

They're not taking. That's a whole different kind of culture where they take you from, like, a good place. But a lot of the time with cults, they say, like, you have to endure pain. So when you're feeling pain, you feel, like, closer to God. You feel like you're gonna earn the love of things. I know you could never say that now.

[Hannah]

But I can see that in my head. God doesn't want me to struggle because he's like, you're perfect. You're adorable. Why would I give you this hard

[Dez]

stuff from an athlete perspective? Like, they would be like, you have to, you know, run two miles. And I'd be like, I don't want to do that. But if I want to be a champion, I know I have to, because other people won'. So I just kept pushing myself, pushing myself, pushing myself until I had nothing left to give except trauma on this podcast. So I.

[Hannah]

Well, we hate being told what to do.

[Dez]

You want to be only by my mom.

[Hannah]

Only by my mom. I'm just gonna say, unless I was in your vaginal canal, don't tell me what to do. Like, that is the only. Because she put all of her cells together to make me. I will listen to her till the day I die. But anyone else. I'm sorry. You weren't with us in the hospital room.

[Dez]

Are you at the point where you, like, don't take advice from anyone anymore?

[Hannah]

Yeah, but when did we. I think. Do you want to know something? I think one of the reasons we're so similar is because we do have the same type of relationship with our parents, and I think we grew up very similar. I forgot what I was going to say.

[Dez]

As in we.

[Hannah]

Oh. So I don't think I. I don't think you've ever taken advice from someone that isn't your. And I don't feel like I. Like we've listened.

[Dez]

I'll take recommendations.

[Hannah]

I'll read your suggestion.

[Dez]

Socks you can submit to the dj.

[Hannah]

You can request your song.

[Dez]

Request your song.

[Hannah]

You have free will.

[Dez]

It's running by Lenore.

[Hannah]

At the end of the day, the two people making the decision are me and my mom. Sometimes we're like. Say to my dad. We're like, you can excuse yourself. You don't actually have to.

[Dez]

Sometimes the dad, like, clouds the whole. I'm like, you need to go. You need to go.

[Hannah]

But there are times where my dad thrown in a sentence. We've taken that sentence. We say, he has a good point. But at the end of the day, the decisions become between the two run

[Dez]

by a lot of things. I also fully. I guess I was like, 32 or 33, and I had a big, important career call, and my mom was on the line. My mom was on the zoom taking notes. They were like, what is that lady doing? I go, she's taking notes. No. And she was literally shaking her head at points like, oh, she didn't like that. I don't like that.

[Hannah]

One time my mom fixed her glasses on a zoom. And I go, she's pursed her lips. We're done here. She's actually put her pen down. She doesn't need to hear anything else.

[Dez]

I think I've heard someone be like, oh, wait, do you bring your mom to a meeting? I go, watch me. Watch me. Okay. After the Kardashians, you bring your mom.

[Hannah]

I'm so happy you said that because they're.

[Dez]

I'm gonna tell her all afterwards. I'd rather her see it firsthand.

[Hannah]

In the past year, Kim has been on so many zooms.

[Dez]

She's on your emails, and people are

[Hannah]

like, oh, and this is Paige's mom. And I'm like, she's not just my mother.

[Dez]

She's the head of operations of my life.

[Hannah]

Yeah. What are you talking about? She's the only person in this meeting that actually cares about my best interest.

[Dez]

Period.

[Hannah]

Period.

[Dez]

It's crazy and it's true.

[Hannah]

So anyway, the mental load those two must have, it's really sad. It's actually sad. It's like, I think about having a daughter, and I' I actually don't want a third career. No, I can't then manage her career. I don't.

[Dez]

You're gonna have to go through so many emails.

[Hannah]

I think we're gonna have daughters. And they're gonna be like, don't worry. We're gonna be like lawyers or doctors. Okay. We're not.

[Dez]

Yeah. My mom had to retire from her job to keep up.

[Hannah]

Same. My mom retired from her job and now works full time.

[Paige]

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[Dez]

Hi, it's Hannah from Giggly Squad. Bottomless apps for $9.99 are back at BU Wild Wings, or as you know, I like to say, bdubs. Paige and I love going to Buffalo Wild Wings, sitting at the bar and just yapping while we snack. Bottomless yaps, Bottomless apps. I love my mott sticks, fried pickles, onion rings, hatch queso chips, and salsa. Honestly, we end up ordering everything and just sharing it across the table, which is kind of the best part. If you're gonna gossip with a girlfriend, do it over apps. And it's honestly such an affordable way to snack on all your favorites. Order your apps and keep them coming while you spiral on the same gossip from angle. It'll quickly turn into one of those nights when you're laughing the whole time and suddenly it's way later than you thought. So head to Buffalo Wild Wings. To get bottomless apps for $9.99 while you still can.

[Paige]

Okay, can we talk about how suddenly everyone is talking about longevity and peptides? Like, what are they actually doing for women? Are they safe? Are they even made with women's bodies in mind? Because respectfully, we have questions, but don't worry, we found answers. And and of course it's with our partner WISP, the leading telehealth provider in the US for women and their partners, trusted by over 1.8 million patients. What we love about WISP is they make women's health feel way less confusing and way more accessible. It's all discreet online and they have a huge range of products designed specifically for women at every stage of life. Especially when your symptoms are like, what is happening to me? We've been working with Wisconsin Wisp for a while now, so when they launched their new longevity and health aging offerings, we were immediately intrigued. These aren't random wellness trends. WISP's longevity solutions are curated by medical experts who actually understand women's bodies and how they change over time. Because your health is not one size fits all and your solutions shouldn't be either. And quality wise, this is huge. Everything is compounded right here in the US and shipped directly to you. No sketchy overseas stuff, just high quality ingredients you can feel good about. They offer things like NAD to support brain energy and fight fatigue and metformin to help with cellular metabolism and energy regulation. Basically things that support you feeling like your best, most functional self. And what we really love is that this isn't just for people who are already deep in the peptide world or biohacking Reddit. It's designed for all women. Wherever you're at in your health journey, WISP just keeps making it easier for women to access real personalized care. And we're obsessed with that. So if you're curious, you can take 15 off your first order with code giggly@hello wisp.com that's hello wisp.com Prescription products require a consultation with a healthcare provider and medications are available if medically appropriate. Must be 18 or older. Restrictions apply. See website for full details.

[Dez]

Not to brag. Yeah, and I'm not trying to come for you and like come for your brand. Cause it's a thing people have been doing since the beginning of time.

[Hannah]

Coming from my brand. Yeah, you're right. In kindergarten there's another girl. Her name is Paige and I'll never forget it. Paige Barber. If you're out there, send me a dm. Haven't talked to you in so long. She told me she didn't like my dress in preschool, and I never forgot it.

[Dez]

She said, there's only room for one page in this kindergarten.

[Hannah]

It was green, and it had yellow flowers on it. And she's like, I don't like it. And I was like. It was the first time someone take a risk. The first time someone I think ever told me they didn't like something. And it was like a core memory in my life.

[Dez]

God forbid you have a little whimsy.

[Hannah]

I went up to my mom. I go, she doesn't like my dress. Can you believe that? I was dumbfounded.

[Dez]

Meanwhile, I was pretending I was Nala and scratching the other kids, and they had to, you know, call the police. But I read a book. Yeah. I bought Fame Sick by Lena Dunham.

[Hannah]

Oh, okay, you already read it.

[Dez]

Well, I was on the flight yesterday, and I was gonna do the audiobook,

[Hannah]

but I also brought the book I ordered, Strangers.

[Dez]

Good.

[Hannah]

The actual book yesterday.

[Dez]

Oh, great. So I read for three hours.

[Hannah]

Like, read, read.

[Dez]

I read 150 pages yesterday.

[Hannah]

Oh, my God.

[Dez]

But I also, like, haven't read a

[Hannah]

book before starting a book club. We're not.

[Dez]

Which we're not. Okay. But everyone should read. So I'm obsessed with fame sick right now because one girls raised us. Like, we remember when girls would drop. Like, the new episode would drop, and it would, like, a different color of girls would come on the screen.

[Hannah]

I'm trying to send Lena Dunham a Hannah tee. Cause I'm like, she would love Hannah Burner or Hannah Horvath. Doesn't matter.

[Dez]

Same.

[Hannah]

It's the same.

[Dez]

It is funny. She was describing the characters, and Marnie is so you. It's so funny, actually. And Han is so me. They were like, she means well, but her delivery is awful.

[Hannah]

And, like, we live together, and I'm like, all as me.

[Dez]

And they loved each other.

[Hannah]

Yeah, they did.

[Dez]

They really did. So because we are working on our first ever TV show, I took it as, like, a research where she's discussing how she got off the ground. She was, like, doing little films with, like, the Safdie brothers and, like, little,

[Hannah]

like, out of college.

[Dez]

Yeah. Like, little festivals. And she basically was like, it's a boys club. Just, like, all these boys making movies, and she. She puts out tiny furniture. She puts out this indie film. It blows up. Judd Apatow's emailing her. This other lady's emailing her, and she's like, I have something here. And next thing you know, as like,

[Hannah]

a 24 year old hadn't written Girls yet.

[Dez]

No.

[Hannah]

Okay.

[Dez]

She walks into hbo. Well, she had all these LA meetings and it was really funny to talk about. And then she walks into HBO and they like, get her and they're like, let's do it. So she talks about writing the pilot, all the stuff that goes into it, and I'm like, I'm locked in. It's really fascinating and I think you should read it to help our journey.

[Hannah]

Yeah, maybe I will.

[Dez]

Because she talks about the casting process, she talks about her anxiety through it.

[Hannah]

Also, the Girls pilot was so, like, rarely do you watch a show where the first episode is one of the best episodes of the whole season. And Girls, I feel like, really was. Usually you watch one episode and you're like, okay, I'll watch a second. But I remember watching that first episode and being like, like, this is the best show on tv.

[Dez]

Well, and it was back then where actually a lot of stuff wasn't being made. So it aired and her life immediately changed. She was. They made. She had done like a little press thing. They took that photo, put it on the COVID of New York magazine.

[Hannah]

What Was this, like 2006, like later? 2010?

[Dez]

I have no idea. Look, I've been around for a long time. I watched so much tv, but like it was. Everyone was locked in on it. And she's on cover of Vogue, like, and she. This is the thing about her. She's not like us. We're front facing people. We're like, put me in front of the camera. She wanted to be a movie director. She wanted to be sitting in the chair writing and directing. And she was like, I guess this role could be for me. And HBO was like, you'd be perfect for it. So she didn't want to be famous.

[Hannah]

Oh, wow. So she didn't write it with the intention of her being the main character.

[Dez]

No. And then it also talks about her meeting Jack Antonoff and their relationship. So I'm only 150 pages in, but

[Hannah]

which I, for whatever reason, during that time of pop culture, I. I like don't remember that. They were like, I don't remember him.

[Dez]

He was like touring all the time. And they would occasionally have like cutesy little houses.

[Hannah]

I think maybe because they were. It was more like. Then he went on to date like, Lorde.

[Dez]

Yeah, I haven't got to that drama yet. But she is such an amazing writer and I think it's because she's not trying to be anything but herself. And I feel like, you know, when you read things and people Are like, I'm so hot. And, like, this is like, she's never bragging about herself, which I feel like so many of these autobiographies, everyone's like, it was so hard being so hot. Like, she's just. She's just like, herself, and you fall in love with her, and she. She talks about everything, and she's hilarious. So anyway, I'm really enjoying it. But she also talks about how also,

[Hannah]

it was, like, right when social media, I feel like, started, she.

[Dez]

And no one told her that you, like, can't be reading about yourself. So while everyone else was like, calm down. She was the face of it. So she'd just search her name and see all these horrible things about her when really she was at the most iconic time of her life. But in her head, she thought that everyone hated her. Yeah. Because that's what the Internet is.

[Hannah]

That's so sad.

[Dez]

When actually she was changing the world for women.

[Hannah]

She really was. She was definitely changing it for, like, I think this industry.

[Dez]

But everyone was. Oh, yeah. And then at one point, they told her she has to gain weight. Cause she was getting too thin. They were like, you have to be

[Hannah]

fat for the role.

[Dez]

Yeah. And she's dealing with her own, like, image issues and food issues. And she, like, couldn't comprehend. Like, it was very complicated. Cause she felt like the whole show was riding on her weight. Weight.

[Hannah]

Do men ever have to get really

[Dez]

fat for a role?

[Hannah]

Like, what's the last they do?

[Dez]

But people, like, really applaud them. They're like, he gained 20 pounds. The next day, he lost 20 pounds because he shat it out.

[Hannah]

I can't think of, like, one movie where I'm like, oh, my God. He played like, he had to gain, like, £40 for that. Other than, like, Christian Bale.

[Dez]

But it's like, well, I know the guy from DTF St. Louis, who dated Lily Allen. Or was he put on, like, a

[Hannah]

fat suit for the dtf.

[Dez]

Yeah. To get, like, a tummy. Sorry, I said to tummy. That was weird.

[Hannah]

It was an imperative for him to be big for that role. I don't.

[Dez]

Yeah, he was supposed to be, like, schlubby. Love saying that word. Schlubby.

[Hannah]

You know what? I love schlep.

[Dez]

I love saying schlep.

[Hannah]

Schlep is such a good word.

[Dez]

It's such a New York word. It's Yiddish, I think.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Dez]

Thank you. We have my mom nodding. Also. One more documentary. Born to Bull on hbo.

[Hannah]

To bull ride

[Dez]

bowl bowlers.

[Hannah]

Oh, I thought you said Born to Bull.

[Dez]

So Ben Stiller produces it. And it is, it's giving. If you're into the chess documentary, you'll be like, it's the same kind of man. It is.

[Hannah]

Where in the country are they?

[Dez]

It's a little like Midwest ish. But these guys is, have full time jobs because like you can't make a living off of it unless you're like winning everything, which is like very difficult.

[Hannah]

And like, how much are you winning?

[Dez]

You could win up to 100 grand for like a huge tournament. But like, if you don't, you could lose money. And it's these guys lives of bowling. And whenever there's a competition I'm in, they all have like characters. I'm invested.

[Hannah]

It's like theater.

[Dez]

Yes.

[Hannah]

Bowling is very theatric.

[Dez]

Yes. And. And it's also pretty simple. So if you make one little mistake, you're fucked. It's very mental. And one of the guys, I would

[Hannah]

assume it's very one on tennis where it's like, if you messed up. No, you messed up for your team.

[Dez]

Yeah. And they're sacrificing their families to be on the road for three months.

[Hannah]

Why isn't bowling in the Olympics?

[Dez]

It should be, right? I'm also obsessed with one of the guys wives. She was a former college bowler and she's like, we get each other.

[Hannah]

Like curling is in the Olympics and you're not just like going, you're not on a Friday night being like, oh my God. You know, it'd be fun if we all went curling. You're not planning your daughter's eighth birthday at a curling center. Like, why wouldn't bowling just be in the Olympics?

[Dez]

I love bowling. Cause I love when people take things too far. Like, I love when you're like at a birthday party and you're like, what if I mastered this? Like, I love that for them.

[Hannah]

Remember bumpers?

[Dez]

Do you remember bumpers? Yeah. Most fun ever.

[Hannah]

Like, I didn't realize people weren't using them. I was like, everyone's good at bullying.

[Dez]

Why would you not use a bumper? That's crazy.

[Hannah]

And then when they like took them away, I'd be like, this is stupid.

[Dez]

That's why. Like when the government was like, do you want to pay taxes? And I checked the box that said no, I was like, why would I? If you're giving me the option, why would I pay taxes? Did I owe money to the government? I told you the first time I ever had like a job with the W2, they were like, fill out this form. And you ever fill out a W2 for the first time. It is the scariest thing ever. I don't know what anything meant.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Dez]

And it said no.

[Hannah]

It's actually insane that as a senior in high school there is not a class for the things that you are immediately going to be hit with as soon as you graduate. I've never heard of.

[Dez]

Yeah, when they start. And then they, they tell you like you should know when they start talking about health insurance. And they. What's the. Yeah, yeah. Oh my God. The words they were using. It's like school. They're like, yeah, go. Go to the real world. See what happens. So there were two questions. It was like, do you want to pay federal tax? And I was like, no.

[Hannah]

So they never took it out. So they.

[Dez]

Why would they give me the option if it's illegal to not do it? And that's when my accountant at the time was like, are you sitting down? You owe like five grand. But he was like, are you sitting down? And I'm like, how is this happening to me? And he's like, did you check something? And I'm like, I don't know. I don't know.

[Hannah]

No, I get that.

[Dez]

Anyway, so I'm moving in stem of the week for that. I had the best meeting with my friend actually. Ally. We were like gonna jump on a call to like write something and do you know when you have a meeting? It was like 6pm no, it was 4pm on a Friday. Do you know when you have a meeting how like you're so dramatic the three hours before it. Like you can't focus on anything cause you have a meeting coming up. And I was like, I'm gonna take a. Like the nap was like so good before it. Cuz I'm like, these are my last moments.

[Hannah]

Well, doing a meeting on A Friday at 4 is insane.

[Dez]

So I, we had rescheduled twice already, so. Because no one's listening, I was like, I can't reschedule. So this is why I love just

[Hannah]

the two of you.

[Dez]

Yeah, this is why I love Ally. Get on the phone. And. And she's like, I'm tired by the way. And I go, so am I. Do you not want to do this? And she goes, did we hop on the Zoom call to cancel the Zoom?

[Hannah]

And I was like, wait, I wish I was on.

[Dez]

No, you would have loved. I was so paid. We literally go, we're in charge. Like we could cancel this right now. And she was like, let's not do it. And I was like, I was doing it. Because I thought you wanted to do it. And she's like, I never want to do it. And I was like, having free will,

[Hannah]

like, I was supposed to go to that dinner the other night. And I was like, what if I just put the outfit on, took pictures and then didn't go? And everyone was like, yeah, you could do that. You are.

[Dez]

As long as you don't tell anyone on a podcast.

[Hannah]

Okay, great. Get a camera. Take a picture right now. Now.

[Dez]

Also, Ally and I did end up talking for like 20 minutes on the zoom, but it wasn't work related. I was like, anyway, how are you now that we're here? And we were just gossiping. And I was like, we could have done so much work on that, but we canceled the call. And it was like, do you know

[Hannah]

that, like, the two minutes before you get on a zoom that I'm just there by myself with other people? I pretend that I'm on my phone texting you to tell you to come on to the zoom because I get nervous. I'm like, oh, actually, I'll text her right now. Like, she's coming.

[Dez]

I'm surprised that you keep dealing with that because I purposely show up two minutes late because I don't want to be early on.

[Hannah]

You know, I fucking knew you were doing that so that you didn't have to do the beginning. Like, hey, where are you in la?

[Dez]

The pleasantries. I'd rather kill myself skipping the pleasantries. Yes. I'm not doing the pleasantries.

[Hannah]

Wait, I'm gonna skip too.

[Dez]

Yeah, you just have to show up like 1 minute 30 seconds late, and they've already done their own stuff. And then you come in all like, what I missed. And they're like, don't worry about it. I'm like, okay. And then I go straight to business. I say, you're fired.

[Hannah]

That chess documentary did something for you because people are out here playing checkers and you're playing chess.

[Dez]

How'd you not realize that? Very strategic. Because I'm consistently too much.

[Hannah]

Because you are a phenomenal actress. Because you come on the zoom as if you were rushing from something else.

[Dez]

I was. I was like, oh, my God.

[Hannah]

Sorry.

[Dez]

I'm rushing to be there. Two minutes late.

[Hannah]

You're looking at something else. You're like.

[Dez]

I'm like, sell the socks.

[Hannah]

Sorry. I'm really woman in stem.

[Dez]

I've imagine your kids running around. I'm like, sit.

[Paige]

This episode is presented by depop. Okay, Gigglers, can we talk about the fact that we all have a section in our closet that basically is just vibes and illusion. Like I bought it for a version of me that goes to Paris Fashion Week, but she hasn't checked in recently. Instead of letting those pieces emotionally support you from the hanger, you could be making money on Depop. Depop is a fashion resale app where your personal taste actually has value. And before you're like, ugh, selling sounds like admin. Relax. You can list an item in just a few taps. On Depop, you snap a photo and their AI listing tool helps fill in the details. They even suggest smart pricing, which is giving efficiency. And the best part, no seller fees. I'm obsessed. Make money easily with no seller fees. On Depop, that means what you earn is yours. Even if you sell one thing, that's a win. Also, Depop has built in tools like offers and boosted listings so your pieces actually get seen by people who share your taste. Because trust, someone out there is searching for the exact jacket you're saving. So download the Depop app, list one item and let your closet start paying you back. It's chic. It's productive. It's Depop. This episode of Giggly Squad is sponsored by Haagen Dazs.

[Hannah]

You know that feeling when you've been going non stop and you finally just

[Paige]

just sit down and everything gets quiet for a second? That's the energy Haagen Dazs is giving

[Hannah]

and I'm so here for it.

[Paige]

They just dropped a brand new flavor made to be savored. There's the new coffee almond toffee ice cream. It's Brazilian coffee ice cream. Buttery toffee pieces, crunchy California almonds. The coffee ice cream is deep, smooth and toffee brings the warm, buttery sweetness. And the almonds give you that satisfying crunch with every spoonful.

[Hannah]

It's the kind of thing you have

[Paige]

to slow down for because you actually want to taste all of it. And that's the whole thing about Haagen Dazs. It's rich, smooth, creamy ice cream that's genuinely too good to rush through a moment that's just for you. Take your sweet time. That's Dazs. Find Haagen Dazs new coffee Almond toffee ice cream at retailers nationwide. This episode is sponsored by Tumi, the international travel, lifestyle and accessories brand. Their Mediterranean Escape collection just dropped and it is seriously stunning. It's a full seasonal line of luggage, travel bags and accessories. The colors are everything. Pink, clay, my personal favorite, washed yellow and thyme. It makes you want to book a trip just looking at it. But here's what I love. It's not just gorgeous, it's built to last. Tumi is known for premium craftsmanship and signature durability, and this collection is no different. Effortless functionality designed for the modern traveler. Whether you're grabbing a carry on for a quick trip or a weekend bag for something a little more fabulous, it's the kind of travel gear that makes getting out the door feel effortless. Explore the Mediterranean escape [e-mail] or in store.

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[Dez]

preva My mom tried to poison me this morning with whole milk latte. Oh, no. Because we haven't, like, had a morning together in a while, and she's the best. So I wake up and she goes, your coffee's ready. And she's making the bed while I'm in it. That's her favorite thing to do. She's making the bed.

[Hannah]

You're the cat in this situation. You're her cat.

[Dez]

Oh. And she's like, it's your stuff. You planned that we have to do. And she's like, I'm ready. I'm fully ready. You haven't done anything. So I get out of bed and I see whole milk, and I'm like, ooh, I've been doing whole milk, but lactate. Whole milk, which is.

[Hannah]

Wait, highly recommend to everyone. Competition for lactate. Okay, listen, we had to deal with all the nut girls to run for president. No, we had to deal with all the nut girls for the past five years. Oh, I drink oat milk. I drink pistachio. I drink almond. How about the next time I go to order a coffee at a coffee shop? Lactaid is an option.

[Dez]

All the other ones taste like shit. I said it. They taste like shit.

[Hannah]

They're also all bad for you.

[Dez]

They're high in sugar.

[Hannah]

Milk is horrible for you. Almond milk tastes like actual ass. Soy milk, I don't think is that great for you either. No.

[Dez]

Macadamia. That's.

[Hannah]

That's a dessert. That's just hopping on a dessert.

[Dez]

Put it in a cookie.

[Hannah]

They won't let us have OG cow milk anymore because they're like, you're a grown.

[Dez]

Lack of whole milk. Stop putting protein on stuff.

[Hannah]

No, have a chicken cutlet. I don't know why. Here's what I'm not understanding about the whole protein epidemic. I get it. Our world is changing. GLP wants people wanna build muscle. Totally. Why are you coming up with the most insane situations for protein when you could literally eat one chicken cutlet? And there you go, done.

[Dez]

You're good.

[Hannah]

Like, you're fine. You don't need to put it in your dessert. You don't need to put it in your ice cream. Like, I don't need it in my morning coffee.

[Dez]

My protein vodka. I don't Protein vodka company get strong while you're getting blackout.

[Hannah]

It's too much. It's too much.

[Dez]

So my mom drugged me this morning, and I said, oh, I don't know.

[Hannah]

Did you drink? You drank it, and then you were like, hey, what milk was that? Or you.

[Dez]

No. I knew from the beginning. Well, this is my problem.

[Hannah]

She didn't drug you. You drugged yourself.

[Dez]

It's like smoking weed for me where every couple years you're like, let me try it. I forget. And I'm like, it's been a while. Maybe my body's changed.

[Hannah]

Maybe my palate's different.

[Dez]

I can handle it. I'm not the girl I used to be.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Dez]

And I said, I can drink a latte that my mom made with love.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Dez]

Like, there's love in it. Like, it would never cause me harm. My mom made it, so her argument is that I chugged it. That's why she thinks.

[Hannah]

Iced coffee.

[Dez]

No, just hot.

[Hannah]

Okay. That is kind of hard to chug.

[Dez]

I did it. Okay, Cuz I'm coming to giggly squad. I got to be ready, got to be on point. And I'm like, o. I have to go have diarrhea. My mom's like, it's not possible that. That quickly you were able to have diarrhea. And I was like, honestly, anything's possible in the world of the white salamander. So she. That's a Mormon reference for anyone doesn't know. So I shot myself, like, three times this morning, but I feel really light now.

[Hannah]

I was gonna say you feel aired out.

[Dez]

Aired out. I actually think I light as a feather because I. I flew yesterday, so I feel like I was a little backed up.

[Hannah]

Wow. So you know what people don't talk about? I was feeling a little backed up. And I said, you know what? I have the Perfect cure for this. I'll get Chipotle. I get Chipotle. I eat it. I'm like, I'm waiting. I'm looking at my clock. I'm like, any minute. Surely this nothing ever happened.

[Dez]

Oh, no.

[Hannah]

So now I'm bound up. And now I'm bound up with Chipotle.

[Dez]

And I'm like, kitty's worried at that point.

[Hannah]

Should I call Hannah? Like, what should I do? So I have a stomachache for four days.

[Dez]

Well, that's when you have to do a whole milk latte.

[Hannah]

I can drink whole milk?

[Dez]

Oh, yeah. Because we have slightly different genetics.

[Hannah]

Yeah. I don't. I mean, I really shouldn't because I do, like, get a stomachache and I feel bloated. But I don't have to like, run

[Dez]

to the bathroom to go full circle. From the beginning of this conversation, I have one more thing about skincare I want to bring to the forefront. Okay. I also don't care, like, whatever people say, like this will make you look like younger, younger or whatever, pretty. You have a list.

[Hannah]

You're gorgeous.

[Dez]

No pores, whatever. People are trying to do glass skin. If it smells weird, I'm not doing it. And I once had a facialist be like, you have to buy this. This. I bought it and I. It was some like, crazy oxygen whatever thing. And it smelled.

[Hannah]

Was it the biologique mask?

[Dez]

I don't know. I don't know. But it smelled like shit. Butter was like, what the fuck is this? My husband was like, who are you? I'm in bed. I. I couldn't do it.

[Hannah]

If I put something on my skin. It smells bad. I am jacked up.

[Dez]

Cause you know it's doing something.

[Hannah]

I'm like, where did they find this?

[Dez]

It smells something so disgusting.

[Hannah]

I'm like, it must work. Work so well that they were like, this is gold. We can't even change the smell of it because it'll change the composition of the skin.

[Dez]

It's always the most expensive, best stuff that you put on. You're like, I smell like molded foot.

[Hannah]

Yes, yes. So if I'm putting it on and I'm walking out of the bathroom smelling.

[Dez]

But it sucks. Cuz it's not like you're putting something like on your knee. Like you can't stop smelling yourself. I'm smelling my upper lip and I'm like getting nauseous. But I also, like, can't wear perfume, so that's maybe my own. No, perfume is like too much going on. Wait, I get overstimulated with perfume. I Can't also be smelling something while I'm existing.

[Hannah]

Wait, I didn't know that you never wear perfume ever.

[Dez]

DEZ it the same way. Once we went to a Mets game, and a guy was wearing, like, crazy cologne, and DEZ was like, I have to leave because it was, like, so strong.

[Hannah]

I've. I never knew that this is.

[Dez]

This is a sober couple going out where, like, the cologne is too crazy. I'm getting high. I'm getting high. Like. Like, you ever smell someone's.

[Hannah]

Do you know that I have designated areas in my home of where perfume goes so that in. At any given time, you can spritz. I can spritz if I'm walking out of the house. If I'm. Sometimes I'll spritz before a zoom, but you never are.

[Dez]

Overwhelmingly type of way.

[Hannah]

Thank you.

[Dez]

Like, I had a coach who, like, I don't know if it wasn't showering or something, but he would spray like crazy, and we'd go to, like, do workouts, and I would, like, like, be nauseous from his cologne.

[Hannah]

Can I say one of low key, one of the best perfumes I've ever smelled. And I've literally put a bunch of my friends onto it in the past couple of months. And this is, like, not an ad, not sponsored. I smelt it. I actually thought it was a room spray at first. Khloe Kardashian's new scent. It is so good. I have never gotten more. I know when a perfume is good because I have so many different ones. And there's, like, a couple that I know that when I wear, I'm going to have at least two people ask me. One is the Prada paradox. Another one is my Victoria Beckham in, like, a turquoise bottle. Positano, it's called. And then my Khloe Kardashian one by far the most people will, like, stop me and be like, what scent is that?

[Dez]

I love how you have a full control group. When you walk outside, you're, like, counting how many people.

[Hannah]

Yeah, yeah.

[Dez]

I'm doing stats, but deep down, my thing is, like, you don't like someone because of their perfume. You like them for them. And, like, I want people to fall in love with my pheromones and my natural scent.

[Hannah]

Yeah. No, I've had full relationships with men when it was. And it was only based on how they smelled.

[Dez]

Same. And then, like, you realize you don't like him. You like his cologne.

[Hannah]

I do think the birth control thing is true. You smell people differently.

[Dez]

Yeah. Yeah. So no, we just, like, keep an eye out for that in these streets. Do you like him or do you like his cologne? Yeah, because men are out here, gas lighting, perfume, lighting you gas, perfuming you, hotboxing you with their perfume.

[Hannah]

And this is even. This is how this. I like all men's cologne.

[Dez]

Also, by the way, why are they calling cologne it's perfume. It's perfume. Why are they like, oh, it's cologne. It's perfume.

[Hannah]

Even. Like, have you ever smelled like gas station men's cologne? You didn't.

[Dez]

You've never gotten, like, some David off Cool Water? What are we talking about? What?

[Hannah]

You've never seen, like, cologne in gas stations?

[Dez]

Like, because that's the kind of guy that you have a wild night. You're like, look, don't tell anyone about this. I want you to flip and throw me around like you've never thrown me around before.

[Hannah]

I can't think of the.

[Dez]

Oh, I have that Exxon parfum.

[Hannah]

The way you can get off brand Viagra at a gas station. You don't think they're also gonna use

[Dez]

that little cologne the way a man who doesn't have a job will have sex with you because he needs a place to sleep at night? That's how that cologne smells. And you'll never have better sex and you'll never hear from him again. Cause he doesn't have a phone.

[Hannah]

But gas station cologne.

[Dez]

Wait, it's called gas station cologne.

[Hannah]

There's, like, one brand. I feel like I can picture it.

[Dez]

It's not Axe.

[Hannah]

It's not coming up. No, but it's like, I think also smells good.

[Dez]

I have PTSD from Axe. Yeah. Also Axe. It's like these guys get a personality. Stop just spraying Axe and thinking girls are gonna throw themselves at you. Even though it did work at the time, guys, it does work on me.

[Hannah]

I'm not stronger than the patriarchy. Okay, I keep saying this. I'm just one woman. I'm just one woman.

[Dez]

Thank you guys for giggling with us. It's time. Thank you guys for giving me. You had no notes. You came in with nothing to say, so I don't know what you're talking about. I love you guys so much. Thanks for giggling. We'll talk to you later. Bye.

[Paige]

This episode is brought to you by 20th Century Studios. The Devil Wears Prada 2 only in theaters May 1st. 20 years after the generation defining classic Meryl Streep, Anne Hathaway, Emily Blunt, and Stanley Tucci return to the healed streets of New York and the halls of Runway magazine in its next chapter, when Miranda Priestley faces an unexpected scandal that threatens the iconic company, journalist Andy Sachs is called in to save the magazine and restore Miranda's credibility. But the industry has changed, digital dominates, and power always comes at a prick who will adapt and who will fall out of style. This is the reunion we've been waiting for, bringing sharp wit, high stakes, and the kind of tension that will make you gird your loins. A sequel for spring Groundbreaking don't miss The Devil Wears Prada 2. Only in theaters May 1st. Get tickets now.

[Ad Sponsor]

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