Giggling about showgirls, summering, and life in your 30s

Summary

Giggly Squad Podcast Summary

Episode: Giggling about showgirls, summering, and life in your 30s
Hosts: Hannah Berner & Paige DeSorbo
Date: August 19, 2025

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Episode Overview

In this episode, Hannah and Paige dive into the realities and liberations of life in your 30s, the art of “summering,” showgirl aesthetics, pop culture hot topics like Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce, and everything from U.S. Open fashion tips to childhood memories. It’s a rapid-fire giggle-fest with plenty of candid confessions, millennial reflections, and meandering tangents—all in the signature irreverent, self-deprecating Giggly Squad style.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Podcast Anxiety & School Memories

[01:29–03:15]

• Both hosts admit it sometimes hits them just how many people listen to the pod.
• They share intrusive thoughts about being caught unprepared (like getting called on in class) and swap stories of “cheating” or bluffing through school.
• Paige: “That is a fear that, like, still haunts me of being called on in class and you have not been paying attention at all.” [02:25]

2. Birthday Gifts and the Reality of Turning 34

[03:18–06:01]

• They belatedly celebrate Hannah’s birthday. Paige gifts her olive-shaped salt and pepper shakers and a ravioli spoon rest—emphasizing their evolved approach to gifting.
• Discussion on the psychological milestone of turning 34:
  • “Which is 40… 33 is still 30. Once you turn 34, you're 40. And that's just math.” — Hannah [05:06]
  • Both agree: 30-33 feels the same, but 34+ comes with a true vibe shift: “I'm in a different realm. I actually do feel like people can call me ma’am now.” — Hannah [05:54].
• 30s are liberating:
  • “For the girls in their 20s who are scared of getting in their 30s… it's the best. Living in your 30s is literally dancing and not giving a fuck if people can see you, but actually enjoying dancing.” — Hannah [06:03, 06:17]
  • Paige jokes about “old Paige” and boundaries about leaving parties early: “But new Paige has to go to bed.” [08:34]

3. “Summering” & No More Trying to be Cool

[07:35–09:29]

• The hosts revel in no longer having to chase approval or forced fun—“Not having to be cool is where you find your actual cool.” [07:41]
• Paige describes the joy of having earned the right to be “done” with staying out late.

4. Pop Culture: Taylor Swift, Travis Kelce, & Girl Power

[10:26–15:39]

• Paige and Hannah discuss Taylor Swift appearing on Travis Kelce’s podcast and the deeper meaning behind supporting a partner’s passions:
  • “Something deep down within me, I don’t like when girls help men in any capacity.” — Hannah [10:37]
  • “When you’re in love, you do stupid shit. You will truly do anything to help that person.” — Paige [10:45]
• Debunking PR relationship rumors and celebrating Taylor’s “hardworking girl” energy: “We love a girl that while people are talking about her, she's too busy working to even know what people are saying.” — Paige [15:16]
• Quick notes on plagiarism of phrases, Taylor’s supposed use of “We ride at dawn” and “Women in STEM,” with plenty of playful self-aware banter about their own millennial catchphrases. [14:30–15:14]

5. Tech Skepticism & AI

[13:08–14:30]

• Paige describes getting fooled by AI-generated videos and feeling “like a 65-year-old boomer mom on Facebook.”
• Hannah doubts everything online: “Unless something happens to me in person, I don’t trust what I read online.” [13:26]

6. Health Talk: UTIs, One Medical, and Blunt Body Honesty

[16:00–18:31]

• Paige shares her recurring UTI woes and the convenience of Amazon’s One Medical: “I got an antibiotic in 20 minutes.” [17:42]
• Hannah and Paige riff on health, self-diagnosing, and the perils of Gigglers tagging them in TikToks about “six-month-old STDs.”
• Emergent mantra: what people say about you, even in headlines, is “none of my business.” [19:00; classic Taylor quote tie-in]

7. Social Overload, Tradwives, and the Amish

[20:07–21:11]

• Information overload and retreating into calm; Hanna jokes: “Should we start like an Amish, but, like, where the women are allowed to speak? Or is that Scientology?” [20:13]
• Paige desires "calm, soothing energy at all times" and laments the content deluge.

8. Millennial Nail Shapes & Sibling Rivalry

[25:23–27:24]

• The changing of almond-shaped nails from cool to "millennial" and the social anxiety over little aesthetic shifts:
  • “I say almonds because I’m not a freak.” — Hannah [26:13]
• Silly banter over sibling dynamics and hanging out with toddlers (improv games, “farty, poopy, Bobby” etc.).

9. Kids & Past Life Musings

[28:01–31:29]

• Playing with and learning from Hannah’s three-year-old niece, Lois, who delivers savage lines like “there’s no spitting in this house.”
• Reflecting on childhood social ease and asking kids existential questions about auras and past lives.

10. Paninis & Cultural Food Inflations

[31:30–32:22]

• Debating the existential question: “Is a bacon, egg and cheese a panini? Is a tuna melt a panini?” (They agree: tuna melt, yes; BEC, no.)

11. US Open Style Tips & Prep

[36:00–39:17]

• What to wear at the US Open: think “preppy,” “East Coast,” and “celebrity undercover.”
  • “If you do look good in hats. I don't. I have a peanut head. I look insane with hats.” — Hannah [37:14]
  • “You have great thick, long hair for a baseball hat, are you kidding?… I'm going to post a photo and let the gigglers decide.” [39:06, 39:17]
• Hannah’s full circle moment: teaching tennis to Chelsea Handler and now attending matches with her.

12. Men vs. Women: Confidence and Self-Critique

[47:37–48:31]

• Contrasting men’s confidence (“If I could train, I could have been in the NFL”) with women's humility and tendency to “over-realism.”
  • “Men will literally wear a hat on the tippy top… my poor friend won’t even go near a hat.” — Paige [48:31]
• Paige’s confession: used tanning oil for old times’ sake, leading to a playful intervention from Hannah:
  • “Versus tanning oil. Then it's heroin. Then next thing you know, you're stealing from your family.” — Hannah [50:59]

13. Summering and Letting Go

[52:14–62:06]

• “Summering” as a mindset; taking a break from work and pressures. Paige jokes about wanting to bring European August shut-down culture to America.
  • “I'm just, like, really not trying to work the month of August.” — Paige [33:51]
• Celebrating teachers and reminiscing on classroom aesthetics: “I judged a teacher by her room.” — Paige [63:08]

14. TV, “The Hunting Wives” & 2000s Reality Trauma

[53:36–59:56]

• Review and discussion of “The Hunting Wives” (scissoring, female relationships, plot twists)—with excited, tongue-in-cheek recaps and spoilers.
• Conversations on 'The Biggest Loser' documentary: scrutiny of the show’s toxic approach and long-term impacts on contestants.
  • “Some people left with eating disorders. Some people, their metabolism was forever, and they gained the weight all the way back.” — Hannah [58:16]
• Reflection on ‘The Swan’ and the harmfulness of 2000s makeover reality TV.

15. Cats, Kitten Drama & Summer Endings

[65:03–67:16]

• Behind the scenes: drama with adopting a sick kitten named Boots, involving emotional texts, a kindhearted vet, and HR-level trauma.
  • “I was like, is she gonna die? And they were like, we don’t know.” — Hannah [65:28]
• Sharing their status as “cat moms” and tying things off with more Jersey and tanning oil jokes.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Turning 34:

  • “Which is 40… 33 is still 30. Once you turn 34, you're 40. And that's just math.” — Hannah [05:06]

• On Confidence in Your 30s:

  • “Living in your 30s is literally dancing and not giving a fuck if people can see you, but actually enjoying dancing.” — Hannah [06:17]

• On Love & Support:

  • “When you’re in love, you do stupid shit. You will truly do anything to help that person.” — Paige [10:45]
  • “We love a girl that while people are talking about her, she's too busy working to even know what people are saying.” — Hannah [15:16]

• On Internet Skepticism:

  • “Unless something happens to me in person, I don’t trust what I read online.” — Hannah [13:26]

• On Getting the Ick:

  • “The ick is real, and I want to say, ladies, women have been getting the ick since the beginning of the time, but they weren’t allowed to because we weren’t allowed to get divorces. But now we can so, like, go off, like, have fun.” — Hannah [59:59]

• On Work-Life Boundaries:

  • “I'm just, like, really not trying to work the month of August.” — Paige [33:51]

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Highlighted Timestamps for Key Segments

• [01:29] — Opening banter on podcast pressure
• [03:18] — Hannah’s birthday and the “olive” gift
• [05:06] — The existential math of turning 34
• [06:17] — The joy of not caring anymore
• [10:37–12:09] — Taylor & Travis Kelsey discussion
• [13:08–14:30] — Paige’s AI video mishaps
• [16:00–18:31] — UTI health hacks and One Medical
• [19:00] — Taylor Swift “none of my business” quote
• [25:23–26:13] — Nail shapes and micro-millennial crises
• [31:30–32:22] — Panini identity debate
• [36:00–39:40] — US Open fashion guide and hat anxiety
• [53:36–56:04] — “The Hunting Wives” and TV show analysis
• [58:16–59:59] — “The Biggest Loser” documentary
• [65:03–67:16] — Kitten Boots drama and adoptive saga

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Tone & Atmosphere

Lively, candid, and always self-aware. Hannah and Paige blend their signature irreverence with genuine moments of vulnerability, sharp wit, and a comforting sense of millennial camaraderie. This episode is heavy on laughter, pop culture quips, honest health talk, and the joys (and giggles) of not giving a damn as you get older.

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This summary skips all ad reads, intros, and outros to focus purely on the episode’s core content.

Transcript

[Paige]

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[Hannah]

Manifest that shit.

[Paige]

We can't be manage. I mean, the day just got away from me.

[Hannah]

Hello, my glowing aura. Gigglers. I hope you all recovered from our cat readings from last week. Welcome back to giggly npr.

[Paige]

I know that we say like, okay, let's start the pod, but every time then you actually start. I'm like, oh, my God, I'm not ready.

[Hannah]

Okay, could I say my most intrusive thought?

[Paige]

Can I remember? Like, what? We don't get ready.

[Hannah]

We don't get ready. But my intrusive thought is, like, it hit me like yesterday that, like, a lot of people listen to this.

[Paige]

No, sometimes I get actually. I actually can't think about it sometimes because I'm like, oh, I am just sitting here shit talking, like, I haven't looked into anything.

[Hannah]

I remember nothing's come across my desk. It feels like the teacher just called your name and you're like, okay, time to wing some shit. I go, first of all, I disagree with what was said before me. So second of all, I'm gonna add on to the thing the other girl said. And I agree. Next.

[Paige]

That is a fear that, like, still haunts me of being called on in class. And you are have not been paying attention at all. And you're like, how many Times did you have to be like, I have. I don't know.

[Hannah]

Okay. I was a really good student in high school, so I was like. I literally was that annoying person. I was like, pick me. I was such a. Pick me. But then in college, I didn't have time to study because I was playing tennis.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

So for the first time ever, I was like, try not to make eye contact with teachers. They'd ask the question. I'd like, pretend I dropped my pencil. No, it was so I, like, kept dropping my pencil. Whenever they asked the question, I'd be like, I'm signing a pencil.

[Paige]

No. My tricks knew no bounds.

[Hannah]

No bounds.

[Paige]

I mean, this.

[Hannah]

Look, this podcast is about cheating in school.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

One thing you'll learn.

[Paige]

Girls had a sore throat. I was like, you have to hit them with an itchy eye. You have to go.

[Hannah]

You have to go.

[Sponsor/Advertiser]

Sweet.

[Paige]

So high brow. They're not expecting it.

[Hannah]

Wait, do you know what we didn't address at all?

[Paige]

What?

[Hannah]

My birthday. We forgot. We forgot my birthday. Stassi. Schroeder's shaking somewhere. She's shaking.

[Paige]

I literally. I have your birthday gift on my counter, and I was looking at it the other day, and I was like, wait, is this, like, so stupid? Like, the things that I got you? Because you. Here's the thing. If you want something, you can go. You're like, okay, I'm gonna go get this thing for myself. And so I feel like our gift giving, it's more like I saw something and I was like, hannah needs this.

[Hannah]

Is it Frog crocs. People been sending me that a lot.

[Paige]

It's just like, okay, do you want to know actually what it is? Oh, my God, I'm so bad at gift giving.

[Hannah]

Gigglers. This is a. A, A press conference right now. Breaking news.

[Paige]

I saw these salt. I'm on a whole, like, like, gift giving for, like, the home. So I saw these salt and pepper shakers that are shaped like olives. And I was like, hannah needs us, obviously. And then they had a matching, like, spoon rester, like, for when you're cooking, and it's like a big ravioli. And I was like, hannah needs.

[Hannah]

See, these are things I would never even know to get for myself. Like, that's actually so good and so genius.

[Paige]

And McKenna's not cooking, but if people come over to think, like, she has a spoon rest in the shape of a ravioli, she's not around.

[Hannah]

She's not around, and she doesn't take herself seriously. Like, she. She has fun with it.

[Paige]

I did. And then I had it engraved, and it says, happy birthday.

[Hannah]

So, like, okay, that's next level. That was unnecessary. You didn't need to do that. But I do have to say I turned an interesting age.

[Paige]

What did you turn? That's how interesting it is. 34. Yeah.

[Hannah]

Which is 40. 33 is still 30. Once you turn 34, you're 40. And that's just math.

[Paige]

I know exactly what you're talking, because 35.

[Hannah]

35 is 40. 34. It's the first time I actually, like, I've been. I'm young. I'm young.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

I'm now. But I had a little fear. I said, oh, I feel like Paige when she turned 30. I'm scared. And then I thought, wait, I'm 34.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

No one can make me take a shot again, no one can make me go. I. I just. Look, I don't need an excuse. I just go, I'm 34. Look at my birth certificate.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Check my ID. I'm 34. That's illegal.

[Paige]

You want to know what? I hated turning 30. Then I turned 31, and I realized 30 to 33. That's the same.

[Hannah]

Same age.

[Paige]

That is the same age. 34.

[Hannah]

I'm in a different realm. I actually do feel like people can call me ma' am now.

[Paige]

34 to 37, same age.

[Hannah]

I have something profound to say.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

For the girls in their 20s who are scared of getting in their 30s.

[Paige]

It's the best.

[Hannah]

It's the best. And I. I have, like, an example for it, you know, in your 20s and in your teens, how, like, when you dance, you feel like everyone's watching.

[Paige]

Yes.

[Hannah]

And you're, like, a little. You can't enjoy it because you're like, that was a weird move I just did. Or like, that was stupid. Everyone could tell I'm trying too hard, and I'm a bad dancer. Living in your 30s is literally dancing one. Not giving a fuck if people can see you, but actually enjoying dancing.

[Paige]

I don't identify with this.

[Hannah]

You know, it was. I was in the car yesterday, and I was feeling myself, and I was dancing, and I was literally like, this is 34, baby. I don't give a fuck. I'm like, that. That weird person, like, in the club that everyone's like, is she okay? And it's like, well, she's having more fun than all of us. Like, that's me now.

[Paige]

I've never felt more millennial than in this moment.

[Hannah]

Oh, that was so mean of you. 30.

[Paige]

You're dancing in the car. 34. This is 34, baby.

[Hannah]

And I quote, also, I was rapping Lil Wayne. Like, it was so having a day.

[Paige]

You get a license.

[Hannah]

I was having a die. I was having a millennial day. I stopped trying to be something I wasn't.

[Paige]

You were like, where the fuck is my Hillary Duff cd?

[Hannah]

Like, truly. And I was like, I need. Well, Grace filmed a video of me, and I kind of panicked, and in it, I did peace signs. And I said something else, and she stopped the video. And she goes, that's two strikes. Two millennial strikes. So I've been in time out.

[Paige]

You. Yeah, you have to. And you're just like, you're. You're summering. Sorry. You're summering.

[Hannah]

Sorry I'm summering. But I just feel like there's no expectations on me to baby fun anymore. To be like, you don't. Not having to be cool is where you find your actual cool.

[Paige]

Well, it's relaxing, like, 20s.

[Hannah]

You had to be hot.

[Paige]

I went out with my family this weekend. Chuggy, so chewy. And I heard my dad say, paige is gonna want to leave in, like, another hour anyway. And I was like, first of all, spot on. And second of all, I would have gone then if someone presented the option. And third of all, I love that I'm like, I've hit an age where they're like, Paige doesn't want to keep going. And, like, I even get hit with. Old Paige would have loved this. And I'm like, old Paige would have. Old Paige would have fucking loved this.

[Hannah]

And you know what?

[Paige]

But new Paige has to go to bed.

[Hannah]

And old Paige did everything she could.

[Paige]

She did.

[Hannah]

And she has nothing left. And let's embrace her and let's thank her. I will never forget when we were at the Time party, and I said to you, can we leave? And you didn't hear me, and I thought you didn't want to leave. And there was, like, 10 seconds where I felt like I lost my best friend. Like, I was looking around, I was like, I've lost her. I've lost her to this part where.

[Paige]

You'Re like, her personality, she's different. She's changing. It's kind of like when your friend hangs out with another friend and then comes and hangs out with you. They're like a little.

[Hannah]

They smell different.

[Paige]

Yeah, they smell different. They're like, oh. It's like, oh, you're.

[Hannah]

They say something like, kind of funny. Where'd you learn that?

[Paige]

Like, you. Wait, when did you go there?

[Hannah]

I go. When did you ever use that vernacular before? I Never approve that. I never approve that at all.

[Paige]

Wait, Vernacular is a great word.

[Hannah]

I've never said that word before, which is.

[Paige]

But it's really good. Okay, we have to talk about this because, like, I know it's. It's, like, late now.

[Hannah]

Like, oh. Like, it's like, it just.

[Paige]

Like it happened. Yeah. But, like, we only record once a week, so it's like, we have to. Sorry. We're a week late, and that's the news.

[Hannah]

Also, we have so much news. We cover on this pod. Like, we're catching up.

[Paige]

It never got news a week late. Like, hello, look alive.

[Hannah]

It's historical.

[Paige]

It's really historical.

[Hannah]

Sorry. Learn from history. Continue.

[Paige]

Paige, you know what I keep thinking of when it came to the Hamptons, and you were like, well, obviously, we're gonna touch on the classics.

[Hannah]

I can't stop saying also we, because Des was there. I feel like we're a little performing. Like, look at our friendship. Look at. Look at this.

[Paige]

We're like, wait, you don't know this story?

[Hannah]

Buckle in. We were setting each other up for jokes.

[Paige]

We were performing. We're performers. Life of a showgirl. Um, no, what I wanted to talk about was Taylor Swift going on Travis Kelsey's podcast.

[Hannah]

Okay, first of all, I love Travis Kelsey. I love Taylor Swift. Something deep down within me, I don't like when girls help men in any capacity.

[Paige]

Okay, I'm so glad you worded it like that, because here's what I want to say about it, because I feel like people were tagging mean things. And also, people, like, in the comments on their own accord were like, I'm so surprised she, like, did it on his podcast or, like, whatever. When you're in love, you do stupid shit. You will truly do anything to help that person. Why did you say person? Like, that person. You will do anything to, like, elevate that person. Or, like, you know, like, she obviously knew then he was going to be on gq, and she was probably like, wait, you know, it'd be really cute if I came on your podcast. Everybody's wanting it, like, right?

[Hannah]

And one thing about Taylor is she loves love.

[Paige]

She loves love. She loves love. So I really think anyone thinking that they were in a PR relationship for me, which I didn't think that maybe I did, like, in the very beginning, but, like, I didn't. I don't think that. But I feel like that kind of proved. No, they're not. Like, she wanted to do this because she loves this man and she wants him to get those views and those Clicks. And you don't want a man that has no passion or a job. I mean, obviously he plays in the NFL, but like, she's like, we're gonna.

[Hannah]

Need to up your podcast. Listen.

[Paige]

Yeah, like, he's not gonna play in the NFL forever. And like, now he hosts a number one podcast. Like, yeah.

[Hannah]

The truth is, is when you love someone, they are you. Like, you are the same. So it's like her helping him. It's not like that. It's more. We don't know things. So we just see, like, okay, she's perfect and she's helping him. And look, look, charity is a great thing. Like more people should.

[Paige]

Philanthropy is like the best thing on the planet.

[Hannah]

Yes. Like, everyone should consider at least volunteering. But unless you're in love, don't go on his podcast. Don't go on his back. Did you listen to it?

[Paige]

No.

[Hannah]

You saw clippies though.

[Paige]

I saw clips. Here's the thing. I think because I am on a podcast, I don't find enjoyment in listening, listening to other people's podcasts because I'm like, oh my God, wait, should I be doing that? Like, am I. Do I sound like that? Or like just random things? Unless it's a very specific podcast that I want to listen to. That's a baby.

[Hannah]

There's a baby making biscuits behind me.

[Paige]

That is a cute baby.

[Hannah]

Check the YouTube. This is Latte.

[Paige]

Oh my God, she looks AI. Okay, here's another thing. I've been getting duped with AI videos. I feel like a 65 year old boomer mom on Facebook and I'm sending it to my kids. Like, look at this.

[Hannah]

Unless something happens to me in person, I don't trust what I read online. And I also don't trust what people are saying online.

[Paige]

I know I don't. Unless it's personally.

[Hannah]

We say online, I don't trust this pod. I don't trust other pods. Unless it's happens.

[Paige]

If you see it with your eyes in the room. Yeah, unless I was in the room.

[Hannah]

Unless you stabbed the person. It didn't happen.

[Paige]

No, I don't trust anyone.

[Hannah]

What? AI tricked you.

[Paige]

A whale. It was a whale video.

[Hannah]

Oh, that'll do it. That'll do it. Because you're not familiar with the, with whales and their, their ways.

[Paige]

I'm not specifically familiar, but I literally now check the comments for someone to be like, this is AI And I'm like, oh. Oh my God. Wait, one more thing I want to say about the Taylor Swift thing. Yeah, I did clock that she said a Lot of giggly squad phrases. And not. Not that we started any of those phrases. We plagiarized all of them. Most of them. Like, they're common phrases.

[Hannah]

We took words that were already invented and put them together.

[Paige]

Yeah, she quoted we write a dawn.

[Hannah]

No, she didn't.

[Paige]

Yeah, she did. She said, we write a dawn about something.

[Hannah]

No, she didn't.

[Paige]

Then she said. I'm pretty sure she said women in stem, but maybe she didn't. I might have made that one. I might have made that one.

[Hannah]

She said, hello, gorgeous gigglers. We know. Tell us a giggler because she's smart, funny, and talented and rich.

[Paige]

And she has cats. And cats.

[Hannah]

And she has cats. No, like, she's definitely a giggler. And I have to just say her coming out with another album, like, when does she sleep? It's so iconic. Because one thing that we do love, which is so funny because we pretend we don't, we love a hard working girl.

[Paige]

Love a hard working girl.

[Hannah]

We love a girl that while people are talking about her, she's too busy working to even know what people are saying.

[Paige]

Oh, that's literally like when. When Haley was like, sorry, I'm busy. Yeah, signing a billion dollar deal. Like, I don't have time for it.

[Hannah]

And Taylor, throughout all her ups and downs in her life, has continued to create what she loves. And I also love this album. The showgirl element.

[Paige]

Like, I'm obsessed. Who doesn't love a little glitz and glamour?

[Hannah]

It's giving us on tour.

[Paige]

No, the life of a showgirl, it really. It's tough.

[Hannah]

What if her next album's Beta Blocker, Beta Blocker, Beta Blocker Blues.

[Paige]

Okay. If she says beta blocker in one of the songs, then we know she's Taylor.

[Hannah]

If you say beta blacker, we got you. Like, we won't say anything.

[Paige]

Speaking of big pharma, I unfortunately was hit with another UTI this past week. You hate to see it, you hate to hear about it. Thoughts and prayers go out. And I've realized that I get one every five months is like my sweet spot.

[Hannah]

I feel like that's a lie. I feel like if we rewind the track. Grace Chris, rewind this, it's a little more often than every five months.

[Paige]

My last one was in April. I checked my medical records.

[Hannah]

Oh, so you're counting when you get hospitalized for uti?

[Paige]

Yeah, when I have to take go on literal antibiotics. I'm not talking about text messages where I'm like, sorry, can't come.

[Hannah]

Uti, not to mansplain you but have you tried boric acid?

[Paige]

Not a standalone, but if it's in any of my vitamins, then yeah, I'm. I take like D Manos, I think it's called. And like I drink a powder vitamin every day for like strong bladders. And I mean I'm doing the. I'm not just out here willy nilly. I'm putting in the work and I'm putting in the time.

[Hannah]

I. A company sent me like a boric acid thing that you just stick up your. And it's supposed to be really good. So just look that up. Not that you need more things sticking inside you because you just, you put everything inside you at this point. So we don't even have a. We have too many variables to even have like a good experiment. Wait, is, are you still on your ut? Uti?

[Paige]

I actually finished my, finished my antibiotic yesterday.

[Hannah]

Should we call it a ut ut?

[Paige]

I feel like it is Bama Rush right now and I feel like I would be like, oh my God. Uti.

[Hannah]

Gamma Gamma. Uti.

[Paige]

But here's what I'm here to say. I wasn't in New York City when I felt it hit and like that's when I go into pure panic mode. I don't think people realize that. Remember One Medical. Like it was a separate app that Amazon owns One Medical now. And you can literally go on your Amazon account, go on One Medical. Take like text to a frickin doctor and be like, hey, I have a uti. And they're like, cool, where's your pharmacy? And they just send it. I got an antibiotic in 20 minutes.

[Hannah]

Amazon is taking over. They're doing same day stuff which is like coming for Instagram. Amazon is getting very powerful.

[Paige]

They're getting really powerful. And although that is terrifying, I am employed. But I'm here to say I'm for the One Medical.

[Hannah]

Like I know One Medical is amazing. I use it. It's amazing. You guys, this is a health podcast.

[Paige]

The health podcast. This is like, this is like tips and tricks on living life. Like this is just something I've experienced in my everyday life and I, I'm proud of it. But I do keep getting tagged in random tiktoks of like you might have a six month old std. And I'm like, guys.

[Hannah]

No. Because one thing, the Giggles are looking.

[Paige]

Out for us, but leave me out of that one. It's not. Oh, that's what Taylor Swift said. She said it's none of my business. She said that there might be and you want to know What? I agree. There might be headlines about me, and my name could be in headlines, and it's still none of my business.

[Hannah]

Did she say that?

[Paige]

Yes.

[Hannah]

Oh, my God.

[Paige]

I love it. And I've never felt more seen because I'm like, wait, I could be. I could be the subject of an entire. Why was I just gonna say eulogy? That's so scary, because that's when someone dies.

[Hannah]

This is the thing I wanted. Words are powerful. Words are powerful. Let's pick the right one.

[Paige]

And it might be none of my business.

[Hannah]

And the none of my business tour starts in September. Yeah. Get your tickets now. No. None of my business. The concept is so powerful because if you were in a world where you can make everything your business, and as humans, we cannot consume so much information about ourselves, about our friends. It's not natural.

[Paige]

No.

[Hannah]

So that's why. That's why trad wives are coming back.

[Paige]

We need a break.

[Hannah]

That's why drivers are going back. That's why. Maybe the Amish were on to something, like a calm. Should we do. Should we start like an Amish, but, like, where the women are allowed to speak? Or is that Scientology?

[Paige]

It's just, I don't want to be in a. I want to be alone.

[Hannah]

Yeah. Pods. Pods. I just want to be alone.

[Paige]

Like, 80% of.

[Hannah]

I want to invent a social media where it just shows you what you need to know. Like, and you put it in like, you're literally like, I need a cat video, a recipe, and that's it. Like, I think information actually needs to be.

[Paige]

We're on overload. No, that's why I keep saying, like, I need Andy and a camera in Pamela Anderson's home. Just watching her, like, do laundry, fold laundry, load the dishwasher. I want calm, soothing energy at all times.

[Hannah]

Mm.

[Paige]

Mm. If I couldn't have loved Missouri enough, now I love it even more because of Emma Navarro to she's the brand's first ambassador and a tennis star. Marie just launched play for the 2025 US Open. It is truly my favorite time of year. And missionaries modern stackable designs are great for on and off the court. Play really reflects that jewelry is an extension of your identity and your self expression, especially in women's sports. Maggiore makes fine jewelry for every day because they believe your favorite pieces should be for more than just special occasions. And Maggiore is celebrated for its inherently minimal, yet playful aesthetic and beautifully designed products. Maggiore believes fine jewelry doesn't have to come at the cost of our values, our communities. Or our planet. So shop Maggiore Jewelry in store in app or [e-mail] this is the story of how I survived a six hour airport delay. I got to the gate thinking it'd be a quick wait, but no hours. Luckily I remembered my prime membership comes with a whole library of free ebooks so I didn't have to drop $20 on a magazine I'd flip through in five minutes. I got into this thirsty little thriller. I was so deep into it. And right at the wait what just happened Moment, they finally called my flight. So now, Whether I'm delayed 10,000ft in the air or stuck at the DMV, I'm never bored with a whole library in my pocket. Free Ebooks Library it's on Prime Shopping.

[Hannah]

Is Better Together on Amazon Live Amazon Live brings you a new way to shop. It's a video platform where you can explore trending products and deals, connecting with the biggest influencers and their communities, including our favorite Paige of Sorbo. But there's also Amazon Live stars like Kyle Richards, Lala Kent all telling me what to buy. I need this because there's too many options out there and I want tastemakers to tell me what their favorite things are for certain events. I love their tech essentials to their get ready with me's plus real time try ons on the latest trends. I want to see how makeup looks on people. I want to see what they're packing to Italy. These are things that make shopping helpful for me. And that's the magic of Amazon Live. Whether it's tech, home, beauty, fashion or something totally unexpected, everyone's on Amazon Live for the same reason to find something they love with people they love too. It's like shopping with a trusted friend. So shop on Amazon now by searching Amazon Live in the Amazon Shopping app and follow your favorite creators today.

[Paige]

You know what's more stressful than a packed calendar? Realizing you're out of coffee right before a meeting. That's why I stocked up during Thrive Market's Back to School sale. Even though you're not going back to school, this is the perfect time to reset. Thrive makes it easy to shop for high quality pantry staples, snacks, vitamins, even skincare without the errands or the ingredient label. Deep dives. Thrive Markets filters also make shopping by diet or lifestyle a breeze, and their Healthy Swaps tool helped me upgrade my usual buys with zero label stress. One of my favorite things is this brand Siete Mexican Wedding Cookies. Oh my God, they are so good. I literally eat them all in one day. But it's fine. But I will never not order them. Now is the best time to try Thrive Market. You'll get up to 25% off select items and new members get 30% off their first order, plus a free gift. Go to thrivemarket.com giggly to start saving. The sale ends August 31st. Don't miss it.

[Sponsor/Advertiser]

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[Hannah]

Speaking of information.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Have you heard that almond nails are millennial?

[Paige]

Yeah, that's why I switched to square.

[Hannah]

Okay, wait, you're a.

[Paige]

Because I was like a. I saw.

[Hannah]

You go square and you didn't tell me why. You didn't tell me why. You just did it. You just did it. And you were laughing at me behind my back, being like, look at the stupid millennial I saw. I knew you were mouthing that to Grace. I knew you were mouthing that to her. She goes, look at this stupid millennial with her almond nails.

[Paige]

In my defense, in my defense, I was never an almond girly. I was always square. And then I went almond for a couple months.

[Hannah]

I can't handle how you're saying almond right now.

[Paige]

Almond.

[Hannah]

Almond.

[Paige]

Almond.

[Hannah]

Almond.

[Paige]

Almond.

[Hannah]

Stop. So I guess you are. I guess you are saying the L. I say almonds because I'm not a freak.

[Paige]

Almond.

[Hannah]

Almond.

[Paige]

You're a.

[Hannah]

You're a.

[Paige]

You're a real problem.

[Hannah]

Wait.

[Paige]

What was I.

[Hannah]

Do you remember? You were just like, Remember? You just repeat what your brother said and he'd be like, stop it.

[Paige]

And be like, stop it.

[Hannah]

So I've been hanging out with toddlers.

[Paige]

I was a little sister, so I was the one fighting for my life.

[Hannah]

Well, I've been playing with toddlers all weekend, and I finally found the perfect game. She pretends, because all they want to do Is improv.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

And we did too many, like, racing. We're just improving it.

[Paige]

Back it up.

[Hannah]

She walks in the room, and I said, give me a motive. What is my character.

[Paige]

No, we're describing kids playing as literal.

[Hannah]

It's. We are riffing. Okay, do you want to know the kind of riffing we're doing? So first I see her, and I have to make her laugh. So I said, farty poopy, Bobby, because that's her brother. She loves when we on her little brother.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

She starts laughing, and she goes, farty, poopy, Des. And I start laughing, and then I go, farty, poopy, bed. And then we're just naming everything in the room. And this bitch was quick.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

And next thing you know, I'm, like.

[Paige]

Running out of objects.

[Hannah]

But then she would ask where Butter is, And I'd be like, butter's scared. And sometimes Butter hisses. She's scared. So then she walks in this morning, and she goes, hi, Butter. So I go, meow. And she goes, my name is Hannah, and we don't like Lois and I. So then I hiss, hella novella.

[Paige]

That's just no drama.

[Hannah]

But then she's like, okay, Butter, come cuddle. And I realized I could lay down, close my eyes, and that's the game. So she was, like, literally petting my hair, and I was going. And I was like, this is fucking perfect. So I literally, like, napped for 45 minutes, and she was being me. She was wearing sunglasses, being like, butter, don't be mean to Lois. She goes, lois is a nice person. Oh, don't be mean. And I go. And she goes, butter, stop it. And poor Butter. Never want to be a part of any narrative.

[Paige]

No, this is theater.

[Hannah]

And it's theater. And then sometimes she, like, throws in a new spin on things that I like. She should be a producer.

[Paige]

This is community theater at its finest. And we need to stop saying children are playing pretend. They're artists and they're improv. They're comedians.

[Hannah]

Do you ever see those kids who, like, remember things from past lives on Instagram?

[Paige]

I'm obsessed with them. I hope to have one one day.

[Hannah]

So I tried to get that out of Lois. She said something.

[Paige]

She was like, did you ask Lois what your aura color is?

[Hannah]

Well, Lois's aura color is pink and purple, obviously. Obviously, I'm gonna ask her. That's a really good question. She was like, you were red because you were a cunt, and now you're better. And then you went to some. You did some emdr. Therapy. And you're much better. Perfect. I love her. She's perfect.

[Paige]

Is she still there?

[Hannah]

Yeah, she's running around right now. She's gonna make a cameo later. She'll come in and say. And say, giggly squad. Oh, I did go. I was going like. And she looked at me and she goes, there's no spitting in this house.

[Paige]

Oh, my God. You're a literal mom.

[Hannah]

In my own house.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

And I said, valid. That was gross. I am so sorry.

[Paige]

What are like three year old girls into? She's three, right? Two.

[Hannah]

Yeah. She loves bluey and familiar. She. It's like very good. We actually watched Pokemon, which I remembered and I was like, wait, this is iconic.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

She loves cats, little kittens. So we're kind of the same person.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

She loves talking about her brother. She. She literally will be like, bobby, Bobby spilled a water all day. She's going up to people going, bobby spilled a water.

[Paige]

Wait, I'm obsessed with that. She goes, I'm so hold them accountable. She goes, I know you think that.

[Hannah]

Man is all happy and never made a mistake before. Literally just spilled a water.

[Paige]

Three year old girls. Three year old girls, Really? I feel like back to mystic Michaela, think something gets. Society knocks things out of them. Because the boundaries in which a three year old little girl has I standing firm.

[Hannah]

So this. She made a friend yesterday also. I wish we could make friends like three year olds do. Lois is very social, though. Like, she sees someone and she's like, okay, we're playing. Like, that's what we do. And heard this girl were like singing together and performing. And I was like, this is like something healed in me. Speak of the little devil. She's just seen me. Good thing she doesn't know how to open the door. She's very confused by doorknobs.

[Paige]

So she's not getting in, you know, and. And. And it comes with age.

[Hannah]

I am obsessed with her. I want to freaking eat her. Oh, wait. I also had one more, like, really important note.

[Paige]

Yes.

[Hannah]

Italians calling something a panini.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Is like dramatic. It's a toasted sandwich. It's not a whole different. It's just toasted. And they're like, oh, do you want a panini? Toasted?

[Paige]

There's whole industries built on basically just a toasted sandwich.

[Hannah]

Yep. Yep.

[Paige]

That they've created this entire lore that it's a completely different cuisine. Like a panini.

[Hannah]

I mean, is it pressed? Yes. But still not enough.

[Paige]

I argue the question is a bacon, egg and cheese a panini?

[Hannah]

I would say, because it's not pressed. It's not. But, like, is a tuna melt a panini? Yeah.

[Paige]

I'd say yes.

[Hannah]

I would argue yes.

[Paige]

If I was under oath, I would testify that, yes, a tuna melt is a panini.

[Hannah]

Wait, can you please. Can you please do the Cousin Vinny quote when she sent her oath?

[Paige]

Wait, this is so funny that you're asking me this, because yesterday I was at the track with my whole family, and they were like, paige, do the thing.

[Hannah]

Do the miseratume.

[Paige]

What part was I did? The defense is wrong. My father was a mechanic. My father's father was a mechanic, and my brother's a mechanic. So, yeah, I'm an expert.

[Hannah]

Imagine you're a deer and you're prancing along. You spot a brook. You put your little deer lips down to the cool, clear water, and then, bam. A fucking bullet hits you in the head. You think you'd give a damn what the guy who shot you was wearing?

[Paige]

Now I ask you. That is the greatest movie of all time. And tome, like, time. Did she win an Oscar for that? Because if not, absolutely robbed.

[Hannah]

She wore a unitard the whole time. You know, the whole time. The UTI is. That woman had to suffer.

[Paige]

No, I'm obsessed with that movie.

[Hannah]

Oh, I remember what I was going to say about Lois. Yeah.

[Paige]

Okay, this part, this week is all over the place and we apologize because literally, I can't do anything but quote Kylie. We're summering. I'm literally. I'm in the thick of summering. I'm in the throes of it.

[Hannah]

Throws of it. And we forgot how to form brain cells.

[Paige]

No, truly, anyone that I work with currently right now, I've been sending text messages being like, sorry, I'm just, like, really not trying to work the month of August. And I really.

[Hannah]

Called me, she's like, how do we get Paige to respond to a text? I go, she's summering, babe.

[Paige]

Grace and Josephine. I'm like, hey, quick update. I won't be in anywhere.

[Hannah]

I called you and I was like, hey, you can't block Grace.

[Paige]

Sorry. I would like to bring the European Union to America for the month of August. We're all off.

[Hannah]

I dare you to change your email to be like, thanks, I'm out of office. I'll be returning in 2027.

[Paige]

I would love to. I would literally love to. People are, like, planning things for the fall. I'm like, guys, no, no, no, stop. Let's live in the present. Let's live in the moment. They're like, we need decisions today. I'm like, the only thing I was.

[Hannah]

Gonna say about Lois was that she said something. Like, when I was in my mommy's belly, she said something. So then I immediately clocked that, and I said, what else did you see when you were in mommy's belly? Do you remember what happened before you were in mommy's belly? And she looked at me and she was like, I don't know. And I'm like, was there a war?

[Paige]

Oh, my God. Do you think Lois is reincarnated?

[Hannah]

I don't know. But I'm getting to the bottom of it.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

I'm just asking her light questions.

[Paige]

I'm like, you're just peppering her with a little.

[Hannah]

Do you remember how the pyramids were built? Were you there?

[Paige]

Imagine.

[Hannah]

I don't. I. Those videos freak. Freak me out. But I do have to make an announcement.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

My summer is, like, about to be over.

[Paige]

Why? Oh, because you're going on tour.

[Hannah]

No, before that. My super bowl is happening. The U.S. open begins.

[Paige]

Oh, my God.

[Hannah]

People don't know this. The US Open is two weeks.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

And I've never been. I'm basically playing in the US Open this year. No one's asked me. I haven't gotten a call from anyone. But I'm gonna be there. I'm so. I'm booked up.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

These next two weeks, I'm going matches. I'm interviewing people. I'm basically. It's. Sorry, there's a cat on my shoulder.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Do you think there's any questions about the US Open that we could help the girls with? Because I feel like some girls are going to go, like, what should the girls be wearing this year as opposed to other years. Sorry. That was so much fun.

[Paige]

You've stumped. That was okay. I feel like I get asked this a decent amount when it comes to, like, what are you wearing? I think, like, Morgan Riddle and Paige Lorenz really, like, do such a good job. I mean, of what they wear and such good inspo. But it's like any other preppy event. Like, you're where it's preppy. So you're like. You have to think East Coast, Nantucket, Martha's Vineyard, the Hamptons. Like, you have to think that aesthetic and that vibe and anything. And it. Whatever you would wear during the day there, you would wear to the US Open.

[Hannah]

Do you know what I think, Hannah? Coated wise, What I wore once that I liked was kind of these, like, baggy khakis or like, white pants. I'd worn it with a tube Top, which I haven't been wearing lately, but.

[Paige]

Well, you're 34. No, I'm just kidding. I'm kidding. I'm. That was a joke. That was a joke.

[Hannah]

No, you're so valid. I'm 34 with a long torso. I'm not wearing Amazon 12 bandos anymore. Like, it's. That's over. Let's stop playing games.

[Paige]

Sorry. I know the long tour.

[Hannah]

Yeah, it's insane. It looks like a Bando I loved. Madeleine Klein wore this, like. I love monochromatic, but she just wore, like, a buttoned up, like, sweater and then, like a. Like a Ralph Lauren hat. Like, baseball hat. I love dress like a celebrity undercover, like, a little bit at the US Open. It's, like, cute. Also, it's very sunny, so if you do. If you do look good in hats. I don't. I have a peanut head. I. I look insane with hats. Wear a little baseball cap with a cute little outfit. Have fun with.

[Paige]

I feel like saying that you don't look good in hats is so crazy to say.

[Hannah]

That's what someone with pretty privilege would say.

[Paige]

But I look. I look at you more than you look at you, period.

[Hannah]

That was crazy. And that was crazy because we both know I don't look in the mirror at all, so.

[Paige]

You don't look in the mirror? Do you know? I tell everyone that, too. Do you know? I'm like, do you know that Hannah, like, doesn't look in the mirror?

[Hannah]

Wait, that's actually right.

[Paige]

I'm like, right before she showers, she doesn't even glance. She's so healthy. She's epitome of healthy. I'm like, that's so fucking healthy.

[Hannah]

Cuz you know what? What I look like is none of my business.

[Paige]

None of my business. But as someone who looks at you more, you don't. I wouldn't walk by you and be like, damn, that girl's so fucking small. I hope she never wears a goddamn hat. We'll never find her.

[Hannah]

See, what is. My hair is also, like, not to bag. It's, like, kind of thick and frizzy. So sometimes when I put a hat on or wear my hair down, I feel, like, insane. Like, my hair is.

[Paige]

No, you have great thick, long hair for a baseball hat. Are you kidding? It's like, that's the sexiest for a baseball hat. It's like, oh. It's like, oh, I'm a little athletic on top. But like, okay, I'm gonna post vlogs.

[Hannah]

I'm gonna post a photo of me in a baseball Hat and I'll let the giggles decide.

[Paige]

They'll vote. Yeah, do it. Yeah, I would like that. Because you said the same thing about pulling your hair back. We argued this episode.

[Hannah]

I'm 34. Like, I can't handle this. I can't change now.

[Paige]

No, we can't handle more. And I'm gonna start using that as an excuse. Sorry. My best friend is 34.

[Hannah]

Wait, I'm sometimes older than you right now.

[Paige]

I think I'm coming.

[Hannah]

Yeah, you are. So maybe listen to someone wise who knows that hats look stupid on her. But, yeah, the U.S. open is going to be fun. I'm actually. I have a crazy thing happening. I'm going with Chelsea Handler.

[Paige]

What day?

[Hannah]

But this is the, like, weird, full circle moment. One, that I taught tennis to her when I was, like, 21, and she. She remember. Two, she loves tennis, and at one point, she was, like, sitting in the boxes of all the top tennis players. If you don't know what a box is, basically like, the VIP table for the match. So, yeah, in someone's box is, like, their significant other coaches, their psychiatrists, their managers, their best friends.

[Paige]

So, like, wait, they're really their psychiatrists?

[Hannah]

Sometimes.

[Paige]

Damn.

[Hannah]

Wait. You know, like, we should bring a psychiatrist on tour with us. It's. It's expensive, but it may be worth the investment.

[Paige]

I would love it.

[Hannah]

Like their mental coach, they call it. But I'm like, it's just. It's a psychologist.

[Paige]

Yeah, got it.

[Hannah]

So. Because you never know. You never know when you're gonna need one hand to God.

[Paige]

You never know.

[Hannah]

You never know. So, like, Kim Kardashian would be in Serena's box all the time. Like, it's, like, cool. So Chelsea Handler was sitting in Maria Sharapova's box back in the day, and I was like, oh, my God, that's so cool. Like, imagine to be a fly on the wall and sitting in Sharapova's box watching with Chelsea Handler in your ear. I'm going, I'm sitting with Chelsea Handler in a box.

[Paige]

Whose box?

[Hannah]

I don't know. Oh, like, I don't know. I honestly don't know. It's very. I don't have any information. Like, when Chelsea Handler says, hey, hey.

[Paige]

Where do you go?

[Hannah]

Car is pick you up. Yeah, Be ready. I'm.

[Paige]

I'm afraid this is very exciting.

[Hannah]

What if I do MDMA at the US Open?

[Paige]

Tell me how it is. Wait, you're going on Wednesday?

[Hannah]

I'm going Wednesday. No, but we're going the following week.

[Paige]

Because it doesn't start till the following week.

[Hannah]

Yeah, this is like a mixed doubles promo.

[Paige]

Got it, got it, got it. Yeah. We're going on the following week and I can only go. Well, I really only go once a year.

[Hannah]

You? Yeah, you make your appearance.

[Paige]

Sometimes I'll go more if it's like a. If it. My schedule allows it.

[Hannah]

True.

[Paige]

But this year I thought I wasn't going to be able to go at all, but I'm go. We're going one time together because then I have to go away for a wedding. So I'm missing all of it. Pretty much.

[Hannah]

Italy thing.

[Paige]

I have to go to Tuscany for a wedding and I'm so very excited because one, I've never been to Tuscany and two, like, this is black tie, honey. Like, this is an extravaganza of a wedding. So I'm like very excited. I have, I have no looks, obviously, but again, how many looks do you have to go to Italy? I like to keep the bar low. Well, I have like a welcome party, a rehearsal dinner, and then the wedding. So I have three looks I need to do.

[Hannah]

Oh, my God.

[Paige]

No. It's a lot of pressure. It's so much pressure to go to Tuscany. No, I saw a TikTok the other day and it was just like, like, I think it was Christina Kirk. Kirkman.

[Hannah]

Oh, yeah, she's so funny.

[Paige]

I think it was Christina Kirkman. She said something about like men, like packing for a trip, like, versus a guy. It's just like, okay, they'll bring like 12 pairs of shorts and 12 T shirts. Great. And you're like doing the math. Like, okay, if we're there for seven days and I need three outfits a day, it's like that. Well, that's 21 outfit. And like that it's a seven day trip. Will put me over the edge.

[Hannah]

Paige, I was talking to male comic the other day and I was like, what do you wear on your tour?

[Paige]

And that's what I love. The honesty from the men, like the, the earnest in their voice where they're truly perplexed is my. One of my favorites. It takes me a little bit of time to introduce something into my routine, but something that I got the hang of really quickly with Symbiotica. Liposomal vitamin C. I started drinking them when we went on tour because the benefits were just too good to ignore. Collagen production, glowing skin antioxidants. If I'm having a panic attack, I want my skin to be glowing. Symbiotica only uses the best ingredients and the best flavors. Their liposomal vitamin C is citrus vanilla and it tastes so good I've actually even added it into my water bottle sometimes. I also love Symbiotica's CMOS pouches. They help with digestion, bloating and healthy skin. I'm always looking for anything to help my skin. They're clean and convenient. The best combination. So go to symbiotica.com giggly squad for 20 off plus free shipping that's symbiotica.com giggly Squad for 20 off plus free shipping I use heat every day of my life and I've tried so so many heat protectants. None of them felt like they were making a difference for my damaged hair until I tried K18's new heat bounce Conditioning heat protectant. Instead of just coating the hair like traditional heat protectants, patented tech fortifies hair from the Inside out for 85% less breakage after blow. Drying Heat Bounce delivers deeper heat protection than ever before, so I can go from a bouncy, shiny blowout to a sleek ponytail without worrying about damage. Plus, my hair is getting stronger with continued use. Shop Heat Bounce at Sephora or use code giggly for 10% off your first order at k18hair.com that's code giggly hair.com so New York City is going through an absolute heat wave, but I naturally run hot anyway when I'm sleeping. And if you run into that problem too, then Mattress Firm Sleep Experts will match you with the right mattress with the latest cooling technology. Mattress Firm has a premium selection so you can get the upgrade you want. Mattress Firm really does make the shopping for a mattress so easy. And Mattress Firm Sleep experts use their training and expertise to match you with the perfect sleep solution. Summer is so hot and don't go another night. So sleeping and sweating for the great sleep you deserve, visit Mattress Firm during the Labor Day sale. The best sale of the year. They make sleep easy. Text giggly squad to 766693 for $100 off your next purchase at Mattress Firm. Restrictions apply. See mattressfirm.com or store for details. I used to summer in Newport, Rhode Island. Shut up often as a young child.

[Hannah]

Really?

[Paige]

Yes. I think that's why I love period pieces because sometimes we we went to Newport maybe like twice in the summer and we and as a child I loved going through the mansion tours. We would do so many mansion tours and I was obsessed with it. And like you go in like the Vanderbilt house and like all these different houses and they give you like it used to be like a tour guide now it's like headphones. It's, like, not as good. But I think that's why I love period pieces, because as a young child, I loved it.

[Hannah]

I've never went to Newport. Well, a lot of Italians are in Rhode Island.

[Paige]

A lot of Italians are in Rhode.

[Hannah]

Island, which is so random. Like, public schools in Newport is so random. Yeah, it's probably no public schools in. In Newport, but I'm going for the Tennis hall of Fame, which is so funny because I kind of skipped the whole, like, playing professionally and just went from being comedian to going to Tennis hall of Fame. But I'm just, like, going with my parents and DEZ and.

[Paige]

Wait, you're getting inducted into the.

[Hannah]

No, but I'm there for it. Maria Sharapova is getting inducted.

[Paige]

Got it. Got it.

[Hannah]

Because, you know, my manifestations.

[Paige]

Wait a second. That. That man is saying physician might be actually illegal and, like, not fair. What is the equivalent? I just like, okay, you know how, like, all men. Like, men are like, if I. Like, if I could have trained, I could have been in the NFL. Like, if I was like. If I was, like, an inch taller, I totally could have been in the NBA. Like, shit like that. Do women have an equivalent? I don't think so, because I feel like we are realistic in certain.

[Hannah]

Women are more than realistic. We're, like, mean to ourselves, where we're like, like, oh. Like, I'll be like, oh, my God, you're so good at, you know, makeup. You could be a professional makeup artist. No, no, no, I couldn't. No, no, no. I could never do that. And I'm like, no, you're literally doing it. No, I couldn't.

[Paige]

I mean, literally seven minutes ago, you were like, I don't wear hats. Hats are not for me. I hate hats.

[Hannah]

I can't wear a hat. I could be so many things if I could wear a hat, but I can't.

[Paige]

Men will literally wear a hat on the tip top, tippy, tippy top of their head. Not even on their head. And they'll be like, this looks cool. This looks good. And my poor friend won't even go near a hat without breaking out.

[Hannah]

And melanoma is looming. Okay, Melanoma is looming. Put your sunscreen on. No men wearing their hat on the tippy top. Who let them? Who let them?

[Paige]

I have to confess something, and it's so bad because I know that I'm out.

[Hannah]

You thought it was.

[Paige]

I'm actually. I'm switching topics. Actually, you're like, we're done. Something else popped in my hand.

[Hannah]

Nope.

[Paige]

Sorry. This is so bad. And I know because I'm, like, on here every week being like, I love my skincare, and, like, I do this and I do that. I put tanning oil on the other day.

[Hannah]

Paige Desorbo.

[Paige]

Not on my face. I didn't put it on my face.

[Hannah]

Where'd you put it on your.

[Paige]

That's why I saw it. I saw it and I was like, did you perineum. No, I didn't. No, I didn't. But. But I still want to do that. I saw it was just sitting there. It looked lonely. I was like, I bet no one's used you in years. Everyone's talking bad about you, and you used to be my best friend, and we had so many good times, and I miss you. And so I did it on my stomach and my legs and my butt, and I really did. The backside of me. But here's in my defense, I feel like in Italy, I didn't really tan the back. Back of me. Okay. I had no interest in flipping.

[Hannah]

But that's where you're wrong. The back of you is none of your business.

[Paige]

It's none of my business.

[Hannah]

I never once saw a girl have been like, whoa. Back of her leg is not the same color as the front of her leg.

[Paige]

Really? I have, like, ever heard of flipping. Like, you can't fall asleep.

[Hannah]

So I've been playing tennis with a bathing suit on, and I didn't realize the bathing suit in the back has, like, a big circle in it because it's a one piece and the back is just circle. So I have a full. Just, like, circle of a tan on my back. But again, none of my business. I didn't even know it was there. And I've been so peaceful until someone told me, and I said, I don't want to know.

[Paige]

Don't come to me with things about me.

[Hannah]

Yeah. Don't talk shit behind my back. Literally. Okay. For everyone listening. Don't use tanning oil, Paige. You know better.

[Paige]

I'm not saying use it. I'm just. I'm confessing something. Let me live. This is a safe space for me.

[Hannah]

True. I do like her honesty. That was really good.

[Paige]

And you want to know what? I fucking liked it.

[Hannah]

It did. Now. What? I needed to step in. Now I have to step in.

[Paige]

And it did. Exactly.

[Hannah]

Versus tanning oil. Then it's heroin. Then next thing you know, you're stealing from your family and you're losing your job.

[Paige]

No.

[Hannah]

You're freaking out.

[Paige]

Yeah. Tanning oil actually is a Gateway drug. Because if you catch me with, like, a beach bum subscription, I'm like, I'm just gonna go once a month. Stop me. Truly, stop me. Because that's when I've gone too far.

[Hannah]

You're passed out in the kitchen with tanning oil all over you, and I'm like, God dam. Damn it. I gotta get her to work.

[Paige]

I'm just like, wait, what if I just try to. It was just like. It was a naughty thing. Look, I'm 32 years old. That's my version of being naughty.

[Hannah]

Yeah, we're gonna have to have a New Jersey intervention with you.

[Paige]

I love it. I'm obsessed.

[Hannah]

But I do have to say my favorite part about summer being tan is that, like, I don't have to wear as much makeup because it's, like, naturally contouring.

[Paige]

It's the same with, like, having a bob. It becomes an accessory. I'm like, I'll put this outfit on, and then I'll wear my tan. Like, and I'm tan, so, like, I'll look better.

[Hannah]

It's so good. But I really feel bad because my. I saw a girl the other day wearing, like, a red sweater, and I was like, it's fall.

[Paige]

Oh, I thought you're gonna say not for my aura, not for.

[Hannah]

Not my. Or not my energy and not my season.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Summer for me is over. Like, it's. I'm back to work. I've been on bed rest.

[Paige]

Okay. That is, like, really stressing me out because I feel like I have a good, solid, like, three weeks left of summer, and you're, like, crushing my vibe.

[Hannah]

It's okay, because you've been working, like, really hard every summer. So this. You need this. But, like, September 4th, I'm off to Vancouver, Oakland.

[Paige]

I had a tough year.

[Hannah]

We're out here. You did, but a beautiful year.

[Paige]

I had a beautiful year. I had, like, one of the best years of my life. Honestly. Actually, I'm like, all jokes aside, I actually think this was, like, this is in the top three best years of my life.

[Hannah]

I'm feeling a mental health moment coming, because I also feel like you dealt with a lot of adversity, but you gained a lot of trust in yourself, and you became more interesting to me. At least I have to deal with you all the time. Because I'd be like, she comes down from the hotel room. I'm like, what mood is she gonna be?

[Paige]

And you want to know what? Start normalizing. People walking on eggshells around you. I like that about.

[Hannah]

No, but, Paige, because, like, We've been together when we both have had, like, mental breaks and we've survived it. Like, could we get any closer?

[Paige]

I don't think so. I think the only way we could literally get closer is if I had a medical procedure and you were in the room with me.

[Hannah]

Like, that is the only. And I was doing it. I was like, give me the scissors. Speaking of scissoring, I'm three episodes into the Hunting Wives.

[Paige]

That is. No, speaking of scissoring, because what in the Texas is literally going on on that show?

[Hannah]

I'm obsessed with it. Because I'm obsessed with. I don't want.

[Paige]

Okay.

[Hannah]

Kind of spoiler, but DEZ was like, what's it about? And I was like, how do I explain it? I said, destiny. It's for girls, though. Like, it's a show for girls. Like, it's for the girls. And he's like, well, let me, Let me see first. Let me watch it first. Determine. And I was like, no, no, no.

[Paige]

Because it actually didn't watch the last episode because I was like, that's very coded. What's going on?

[Hannah]

That's very. I have to shout out Malin Ackerman. I feel like she's never acted like this before, and she's so good in it. Yeah, but what makes it fun is because you think it's this stereotypical, like, oh, ladies who brunch and spend their husband's money and don't do anything, and this new girl comes in who's, like, very smart and stuff, and you immediately think she's better than those women. Then you realize those women are fucking feminists because they're just fucking each other and taking advantage of their husbands. And I'm starting to think we've. We've got it all wrong here.

[Paige]

I didn't see the element of, like, where they were all gonna, like, have sex with each other that, like, I was like, oh, my God. I didn't see that coming. Like, when the first sexual thing happened, I was like, wait, that is so not what I thought. See, I can't read certain things in the be. I'm like, that was not what I was thinking.

[Hannah]

I think they also wanted to surprise you. Like, oh, why are her tits out? That came out of nowhere.

[Paige]

I was like, wait, are they gonna. Yeah, there is something about a show that I do like that when they give me that question where I'm like, wait a minute. Are they about to hook up up? Like, that excites me.

[Hannah]

I, I, I also think when that girl was being mean to her I didn't realize she was. It's because she was jealous, not because she was just, like, being a. To the new girl.

[Paige]

Correct.

[Hannah]

So now I'm trying to think, like, everyone. Every girl's been mean to me. I'm like, were you trying to.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

Are you trying to. Oh, my God. But that's why, like. No, I just. I think it's. It was very entertaining. The Hunting Wives. I do have something that you guys have to watch. Documentary about the Biggest Loser just came out on Netflix.

[Paige]

Like the TV show?

[Hannah]

Yeah. Did you watch the biggest.

[Paige]

The Biggest Loser? We could be referring to a lot of people. I mean, it's not a new thing.

[Hannah]

At the end of the pod, we go, who's the biggest loser of the week?

[Paige]

And the biggest loser of the week.

[Hannah]

Did you watch that show?

[Paige]

I didn't, but I feel like my grandma watched it, so I feel like by osmosis. I feel like I watched a couple episodes.

[Hannah]

I was really into it.

[Paige]

Really.

[Hannah]

I. It was so, like. You'd see people be like, my life is ruined by my weight. If I could lose weight, it would save my marriage and my children and my life. And then you watch them get yelled at by Jillian Michaels, like, really mean. And then they weigh themselves and they lose 15 pounds. And then you're, like, hooked. You're like this person. But when they reanalyze everything, they realize, like. Like, they're basically telling people, like, if you're fat, you. You suck. Like, you're not a human.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

And. And you can't control yourself around food. When everyone.

[Paige]

How are they losing it so fast, though?

[Hannah]

Okay, it turns out. Well, they were working out eight hours a day, like professional athletes. You just see them, like, on the treadmill, puking, like, lifting tires. And these are people who, like, haven't walked in years.

[Paige]

Is that even safe?

[Hannah]

So there's a doctor that was on the show that was like, yo, you can't. This person's gonna have a heart attack.

[Paige]

Yeah, you're going to die.

[Hannah]

But obviously, the producers were like, shut the up, doctor.

[Paige]

Yeah. And they'd leave it to reality.

[Hannah]

Yeah. And they'd make them do embarrassing things.

[Paige]

Like, not good tv, but also could win us an Emmy. Shut your mouth.

[Hannah]

So. And then they wanted people to get bigger and bigger and bigger to make it more exciting with. The bigger the people are, the less they could, like, do physically. You got to start them off slow. Then caffeine pills were going around. So the. And then these people realized, I want to win. They want to win $250,000. So this one guy was like, I was literally just drinking water and lemon and, like, maple syrup. Like, I did a cleanse. He said he was so dehydrated that there was blood in his urine. But he won. But it was like.

[Paige]

Like, at what cost?

[Hannah]

Some people left with eating disorders. Some people, their metabolism was forever, and they gained the weight all the way back. Some people were traumatized by the edit because they were given a villain edit. And it's like, these people are just trying to lose weight.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

And they were make some friends are not friends anymore because they made the friends fight. Long story short, I was a little traumatized by a little ptsd. But at the time, the world was different back then. And we were like, yeah, Pete, they were transforming these people's bodies. I would argue.

[Paige]

I mean, I watched a show called the Swan.

[Hannah]

I was gonna say, that was worse.

[Paige]

That was. Look at this hideous specimen of a woman. We're gonna change her. Don't worry, you won't have to look at her. Anyway. Like, that was truly insane. And I think that did something to my brain chemistry.

[Hannah]

And also, there was always this, like, I want to save my marriage. Like, my husband doesn't like me because I'm fat. And this woman told this great story where she went there to save her marriage because she was in a toxic marriage and she thought he would stop cheating on her if she lost.

[Paige]

Classic.

[Hannah]

She survives all this crazy stuff, get gets back, looks gorgeous, and realizes, I hate this guy.

[Paige]

Oh, that is the best is.

[Hannah]

And gets out of the marriage. So it was less changing her body. It was more. She changed her mindset.

[Paige]

There's nothing like waking up. There's nothing like waking up and being like, wait, you're a loser, and this is embarrassing for me and all my friends. I gotta go.

[Hannah]

All my friends. You're like, now I have to go on apology tour to my friends. God damn it.

[Paige]

No, you literally. Literally, like, sorry. That was a weird time. Thanks for sticking by me.

[Hannah]

The ick is real, and I want.

[Paige]

It's so real.

[Hannah]

And I want to say, ladies, women have been getting the ick since the beginning of the time, but they weren't allowed to because we weren't allowed to get divorces. But now we can so, like, go off, like, have fun. I love the idea that, like, nowadays we can have multiple husbands.

[Paige]

Yeah. Like, even watching, like, Gilded Age, they're trying to, like, normalize being divorced. Because, like, at that time, the only way you could get divorced was if one of you committed adultery. And men Men were, like, accepted back into society. But, like, after a woman got divorced, even if she wasn't the one that cheated, she, like, wasn't accepted back into society. They were like, you're done.

[Hannah]

Well, and you're done.

[Paige]

Literally, you're done. And it's just so crazy.

[Hannah]

Like in this documentary, Mr. Mrs. Murder, they're super religious and they're having a fair together. And the guy's like, can you divorce your husband so we could be together? Allegedly. And she was like, no, but if you kill him, I think we can. And it's like, that's not logical. No, like, God wouldn't like that. I know. God really, like, actually get a divorce, you know?

[Paige]

It's really scary to think about. And maybe this is like something like in your. I mean, you're 34, so I'm sure you've thought about it before.

[Hannah]

I've had a lot of time.

[Paige]

How many worlds insane people there are. And you're like, you're allowed to do what I do in everyday life. It's not safe for other people.

[Hannah]

My favorite thing is when you see someone doing something in public and you're like, how did you make it here?

[Paige]

How did you get past School system? Okay, the same school system. And somehow you're like, you're being crazy.

[Hannah]

You've seen someone at a restaurant. Like, how they're acting. And I'm like, you've been doing this for how many years and no one's punched you in the face?

[Paige]

Hello? Is everyone okay? Everyone needs to get a check. Everyone needs to start summering more and just, like, calm it down. Calm it down, calm down.

[Hannah]

Summer Fridays. Embrace it, it. Embrace it.

[Paige]

Live it, learn it. Put a Summer Fridays mask on.

[Hannah]

I feel like you just discovered summer this summer.

[Paige]

I did. I'm like an alien.

[Hannah]

Have you heard of this thing called summer?

[Paige]

Like, like, it's a Sunday, and it's like, what will I do? I don't know. I feel like a young Carrie Bradshaw. I'm like, new York is my boyfriend. I could do anything. Today, the world is at my feet.

[Hannah]

Shout out to teachers, even though they're so, so, so, so underpaid and undervalued. But at least people were like, they've been dealing with kids all year. Give them a summer.

[Paige]

Can I say something? I do love clearing a teacher's list. It's an adrenaline rush like no other. I'm like, fuck, yeah, they need those markers. Are you kidding?

[Hannah]

Yeah. But I also think the government shouldn't be making teachers have to ask.

[Paige]

I know.

[Hannah]

Pay for markers. Okay.

[Paige]

I know. We should put the money. Looking at the list, I'm like, wait, this is like. These are such. Such basic things like that. Yeah. Every school should have this.

[Hannah]

Every school should have it. Give them a clock. How do they know when they're getting to the next?

[Paige]

And also, I will say, like, as a child, because I loved aesthetic. Obviously, I'm a pink aura. I judged a teacher by her room. Okay. I was like, okay, what's going on here? No effort. The season has been changed.

[Hannah]

The feng shui is really off.

[Paige]

I'm like, really? We're in November. You still have apples up on your poster board, like, with all our names on it. It's time for snowflakes.

[Hannah]

Also. You're like, it's giving busy. Like, let's get no border.

[Paige]

Interesting choice. No border. You go.

[Hannah]

Also clashing, clashing colors.

[Paige]

I was. I was very picky on classroom teachers aesthetic. I'm like, with that outfit, that's crazy work.

[Hannah]

I love teachers who were exacerbated. Like, I thought it was so cool.

[Paige]

I don't think that's the word for what, like, that was.

[Hannah]

No, but you know when, like, a kid would start acting out and the teacher would be like, jerome, I'm not doing this with you, Jerome.

[Paige]

No. Teachers have such a, like, no. I don't know how they do it. I don't know how they do it. But I did see a tick tock, actually, because I'm like, deep and I feel like, teacher tick tock. Well, I'm on Amazon looking at so many teacher stuff, mate. My phone is like, you're a teacher? Yeah. I saw a teacher say, like, never once has she referred to going and being a teacher as going to work. She always says, I'm going to school.

[Hannah]

Yeah.

[Paige]

And teachers were like, duetting it and being. Because one teacher was like, oh, no. I say, like, I have work. And it's like, other teachers were like, it's not work, it's going to school. And I think that's, like, I never thought of that, obviously, because, like, once I left school, I never thought about it again. But.

[Hannah]

But they love. They loved school. So it's like, now they get to do it again and make it, like, amazing for the kids. Shout out to. Shout out to my teacher.

[Paige]

Shout out to teachers because, like, I feel bad. They're coming through a tough time. It's gonna. They're almost back in and it's scary.

[Hannah]

Final note, Final note. So I didn't tell you guys because there was drama going on with Grace and Boots.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

And I didn't want to upset the gigglers before it was like dealt with.

[Paige]

What was going on.

[Hannah]

Yeah. I didn't want you guys like having.

[Paige]

This on your heart. We're not gonna say something that. And then you have more questions.

[Hannah]

More questions. And I don't want to heavy on your heart while you're going through your week.

[Paige]

Yeah.

[Hannah]

So I'm ready to get Boots adopted. And the nurse comes back and says, sorry, you can't bring her to Grace. She has a fever. And when a kitten has a fever, that's crazy. Like, it's scary. And I was like, is she gonna die? And they were like, we don't know. So I text Grace and I'm like, hey, Boots is sick and could die. And Grace was like, are you gonna pay for my trauma therapy? And I said 100%. This is all my fault.

[Paige]

It's an HR issue.

[Hannah]

It's an HR issue that we will deal with separately and privately. But she.

[Paige]

Imaginous dealing with anything separately and also privately. Could you imagine? What a luxury, What a luxury to deal with something separately and privately.

[Hannah]

The Grace documentary, when it comes out is going to be. She's going to be faceless with her voice distorted.

[Paige]

There's going to be so many players and like lore and like twists and turns. It's crazy. There's so many randoms.

[Hannah]

So Boots is getting taken care of. They're giving her some meds. They're afraid she has this thing called fip. Like it's basically like feet, like feline coronavirus. And then the vet takes her home to her house. So we're like that weekend and we're like, oh, no. Like, is Boots being trafficked? But the vet was like making sure she's gonna be okay finally this last week.

[Paige]

Wait, so nice at the vet.

[Hannah]

No, I know. She went above and beyond. Boots has been fever free for five days. She's still going to be on meds. But Grace has officially taken home Boots as of yesterday. So we all are cat moms.

[Paige]

And that was quick. You did a quick flip on Grace. How many years is that?

[Hannah]

Like three. Three. It's pretty good.

[Paige]

I mean, mine was like a solid seven.

[Hannah]

I know. Well, that. Because we had some bumps in the road.

[Paige]

Bumps in the road.

[Hannah]

We're very busy with our cats and busy summering.

[Paige]

I'm so busy summering and I'm not even doing anything. It's just me sitting in my apart being like, leave me alone and going.

[Hannah]

Should I put more tanning oil on you? Sicko you sicko.

[Paige]

I've literally been spending too much time in Jersey. I'm just like, sorry. I'm trying to fit in. Sorry. I want the girls to like me. I'm like, hello.

[Hannah]

Oh, my God. You have to smell. What is it? It's. Does it have, like, scent?

[Paige]

It smells amazing.

[Hannah]

Yeah, it smells nuts. Joy Wine drop.

[Paige]

I mean, it's just like. I'm like, guys, I'm so sorry that you're getting such heat right now. They need new priming life. They need something like. I mean, it did have a little spf. There was a rotisserie chicken out there, and I loved every second of it.

[Hannah]

We love you guys so much. Thank you for giggling with us and we'll talk to you next week. Bye.

[Paige]

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