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Hannah Berner
This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. You chose to hit play on this podcast today.
Paige Desorbo
Smart choice.
Hannah Berner
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Des Bishop
Sometimes hosting can be a little bit stressful and you always have to have a plethora of drink options. And I'm not the best at mixing different cocktails. And that's where Sun Cruiser comes in. Sun Cruiser is a refreshing iced tea and vodka drink. It's a non carbonated so no bubbles, fill you up or have you burping. And it's only a hundred calories. It's so easy when people come over to just offer them drinks that already taste good. Easy cleanup. Here you go. No mixing, no adding chasers. And Sun Cruiser inspires good times and it brings the sunny vibes to you. So no matter where you're hosting, if you're in an apartment this fall or you're in a house and it's getting chilly, it's still summer vibes with Sun Cruiser. So crack one open today and let the good times cruise.
Hannah Berner
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Paige Desorbo
Sup, gigglers? Gary, fix the Wi Fi. Manifest that shit. We can't be manic. I mean, the day just got away from me. What's up, my gastrointestinal giggler? I have to formally apologize. The podcast is late by a day. Surprisingly not. Because of Paige? Because of me? No, because of me. I have been peeing from my butthole. I'm on day three. Don't be jealous. I have a stomach flu. I know. The girlies are like, why not me? Well, chase your dreams.
Des Bishop
Can't. But truly, when you do have a stomach flu, are you looking at the bright side of things where you're like, do you feel like all the toxins are just leaving your body?
Paige Desorbo
Some kind of detox is happening. But I'm like, what kind of devil is living in my stomach right now?
Des Bishop
Also, I think you were with two kids under, too.
Paige Desorbo
That's what DEZ said. Des was like, well, you're with kids, so that's what happens. Also, I think your body does just break down after a certain amount of touring. Yeah, it's just part of it. Also, I looked in the mirror, and I was like, oh, my God, I look so pale. And then I was like, or did my spray tan just wear off? I can't tell if I'm pale or it's just the November.
Des Bishop
Okay, here's the one thing with Giggly Squad touring. I can't look pretty this many days in a row. No, like, at the last show. What was our last show? Chicago. My makeup just, like, wouldn't actually even go on my face anymore. It was like. There's no amount of concealer and contour to make you look alive.
Paige Desorbo
It's. I feel like the show itself is getting funnier, but the back end is getting less funny.
Des Bishop
We're crashing. We're crashing. It's not good over here.
Paige Desorbo
And we're about to go to Texas.
Des Bishop
The other day. We've also gotten so insanely close. It's not good for humanity.
Paige Desorbo
No, it's not good.
Des Bishop
We haven't seen each other in 24 hours. We just chatted for a full hour before we recorded because it was so much happened.
Paige Desorbo
Wait. We'll literally go to bed after a show at, like, midnight, wake up at 9am at the airport, and I'll look at her, and I'll be like, what's the gossip? What's going on? She's like, bitch, we've been asleep for nine hours straight. And I'm like, you have nothing to give me. Nothing happened since we were gone.
Des Bishop
I usually can muster up a small trinket of something, like, nugget.
Paige Desorbo
Someone liked this on Instagram. And I'll be like, that's the tea. That's the tea.
Des Bishop
I'll just start making shit up. I'm like, imagine if this happened. Here's what. There is one small piece of discourse I feel like I would like to address that I. I'm so proud of everyone in the arts. I'm so proud of everyone. I'm so, like. I love when people find something that they love, and I am so supportive of it. And I think that you should love whatever you want. I know what you're about to say. Bodily harm.
Paige Desorbo
I know what you're about to say. You're about to say something controversial. Oh, no.
Des Bishop
Again, I love that people love Wicked. I'm so excited for that.
Paige Desorbo
Paige.
Des Bishop
I'm so pumped for them. I love that they're getting all their outfits. I love that they're going. I love that they're expressing themselves freely on social media in a way that they see fit for their particular lifestyle. Me, on the other hand, no amount of musical theater can heal the world. Ken. Spark. Such joy in me.
Paige Desorbo
That's her favorite thing to say right now. Spark.
Des Bishop
Joy that a tear just falls down my sparkled face. It just wait.
Paige Desorbo
There's two types of people. People who can hear singing live and it makes them cry, or people who hear singing live and go, this isn't for me.
Des Bishop
Yeah.
Paige Desorbo
Also, are you projecting a little bit because you have been forced by Craig to watch musicals against your will.
Des Bishop
Now, as a self reflective person, I would like to see myself as. I thought that I said, is this just me having group mentality and hating on something that other people hate on? And like, if it was a different. A different genre, a different situation and people were hating on me for loving something, I would say, go fuck yourself. But here's the thing. At 16 years old, my mom planned a beautiful sweet 16 for me. She got all my friends inside of a limousine. She. That drove us down to New York City. We went to lunch at Serendipity. We got the frozen hot chocolate. I loved my outfit. We then went to see the play Wicked with the original cast, mind you. Like, we went all out. Hannah. I took one of the longest naps in the history of my napping career. Didn't see a single second of it. Okay.
Paige Desorbo
Or was it. Were the noises so calming? The singing was so peaceful and he just blurred you to the deepest REM sleep you've ever.
Des Bishop
I actually felt bad for my mom. And my mom was like, oh, like don't. I don't care at all. Paige. Like, you had a great time with your friends. And then my grandma, my mom's mom, also dead asleep.
Paige Desorbo
So it's genetic.
Des Bishop
So it's genetic.
Paige Desorbo
And I was gonna say something about Wicked too, which I feel like people might look at me differently after this, but I had even less of a childhood than you. Never saw Wicked once? No. Wasn't even brought up.
Des Bishop
Don't even know the story of it.
Paige Desorbo
Wasn't brought up in the household.
Des Bishop
Wasn't even brought to the dinner table. And that's it. And that's a family that I would marry into.
Paige Desorbo
I was crying on tennis courts. Okay. I didn't have time to go watch.
Des Bishop
To never Came across your desk.
Paige Desorbo
Never came across my desk. But where I think we're jealous a little bit is that we've never loved anything as much as people love Wicked.
Des Bishop
No, they've. They've never loved. I'm like, where do I find my niche?
Paige Desorbo
I wish an outside source could affect my psyche so much that I could be in a bad mood. Something else happens to someone else, and suddenly I'm. Yeah, I'm overjoyed. I think I need to see it, though.
Des Bishop
I'm for sure gonna watch it on my couch. Like, I'm gonna throw it on and see what the hype is about.
Paige Desorbo
We should live stream, watch it.
Des Bishop
I'm. I'm going to say I'm probably going to come back to a podcast and episode and be like, I loved it. It was a great movie. But. But that is as far as I know I'll ever take it.
Paige Desorbo
Yes. Yes. You know, the only time I cried was when I met Roger Federer.
Des Bishop
Yeah. It's just. It's not. It's not something I've ever been into. But I love look and I love Ariana Grande. When she came out and said, what did she say on the podcast Last Culturistas, which is a such a hilarious podcast that her fans were going to be mad because she wants to go, like, more into acting and, like, doing imp impressions and stuff like that, I was so h. I was like, yes, I think that's so. I don't need another pop star. I think you, like, did what you needed to do in.
Paige Desorbo
Well, life is about change and evolving.
Des Bishop
Music, theater, theater. You love it.
Paige Desorbo
Yes. Well, you know what? It is a great day for musical theater kids. And again, we support musical theater kids.
Des Bishop
I support all the musical theater kids. I wish when I was a young child, I found that. That niche of something to all those musical theater kids.
Paige Desorbo
You're fucking lucky that me and Paige can't sing, because if we could, we would never shut the fuck up. Like, we would. I'm so happy I can't sing because I would be arrested by now. I'd be. I'd be put underground.
Des Bishop
I'd be too powerful is what it be. I'd be way too fucking powerful.
Paige Desorbo
I think I wouldn't be able to sustain normal relationships.
Des Bishop
The streets would have been made for dance.
Paige Desorbo
That's one thing they don't say about us. Me and you. We've never broke out into a song or a dance.
Des Bishop
No.
Paige Desorbo
I never once been like, you know what this moment needs? A little dance rehearsal, a little Diddy.
Des Bishop
Yeah. It's. Oh, bad play on words. Absolutely. Absolutely not. Does it need a little ditty that's terrifying in 2024? Sorry to bring the mood down.
Paige Desorbo
We were talking about happiness and singing. Do you like the fashion of the premieres of Wicked?
Des Bishop
You know, I was really hoping you weren't gonna ask me that question because you put me in an uncomfortable position.
Paige Desorbo
I'm the Barbara Walters of this podcast. I have to ask the hard questions.
Des Bishop
No. It's so true. I. Yes.
Paige Desorbo
Did you just have a stroke? I. Sorry.
Des Bishop
I'm trying to. I'm trying to get my voice in tune. I'm actually going to singing.
Paige Desorbo
Wait. I actually do love singing on tour. I have one moment in the show that I sing.
Des Bishop
No, it's part of our show. Hannah breaks out into song. You are a musical theater kid at Giggly Squad Live. You break out into dance and song.
Paige Desorbo
Have you ever, once on stage, let yourself sing for a second and immediately I'm on American Idol. We're in front of 3,000 girls with a mic and I'm like, I can say whatever the fuck I want right now. And I start just singing. And then you're like, please stop.
Des Bishop
I don't know how you do it. We were at one show and a girl said, got up and said, it's my best friend's birthday. Will you sing Happy birthday to her? I went into an immediate cold sweat.
Paige Desorbo
I did the Marilyn Monroe version and I was like, happy birthday.
Des Bishop
No. And that's why you're my best friend. Cuz I was like, Hannah will pop out. Let's something.
Paige Desorbo
Because one thing we've learned in the gigas while live show is that I am a people pleaser. Is that anything that Gigglers asked me to do, I will do. They're like, can you shave your head? And I said, oh, okay, fine.
Des Bishop
If you don't believe her, you should see her getting on a plane the next morning. Not being able to walk because her lower back is fucked because she keeps doing the worm.
Paige Desorbo
I'm also doing the worm in mini dresses, so my Amazon granny panties are just out. I don't even know if people want to see that.
Des Bishop
Oh, God.
Paige Desorbo
So anyway, stop trying to distract me. The Wicked fashion. What are we thinking? I just think they've done a lot of premieres. How many premieres? They've been premiering for about a year.
Des Bishop
Here's one thing I will say when there's a movie premiering and they're like very much in the character of that movie throughout their fashion of the press Junket. I love it. I love that they, like, stay on theme. I loved Margot Robbie doing all the Barbie outfits. I thought it was just fun. When else are you gonna be to wear those kind of kinds of outfits? So I'm so into both of the leads leaning into their characters in a fashion sense. Do I think some of it could have been, like, a little bit more interesting to look at? Yeah, but who doesn't have an opinion? That was so Kim Kardashian of you.
Paige Desorbo
Sorry, you're the. Did she say that or did. Yeah.
Des Bishop
Sometimes the phrase come on, give me nothing comes to mind. But who am I to judge? Who am I to judge? I'm barely, you know what it is? I'm barely keeping it going.
Paige Desorbo
You know what it is? I think Ariana's color palette and look. I don't even believe in the whole winter, spring, summer thing. I think that's all bullshit on Instagram. You know, they're like, clearly she's a winter, spring. And it's like, no, it's not clear because she actually looks good in all those shades of pink. And no one's, like, gonna be ugly with a slightly different shade of pink anyway.
Des Bishop
Yeah.
Paige Desorbo
As an Italian, let's not forget she's Italian. She's Italian. And as an Italian who's bleached her hair blonde before, it's not meant for us. Sometimes. Yes, sometimes. Sometimes, Sometimes.
Des Bishop
I have loved Ariana Grande for so long. I thought. I've always thought she's an incredible singer and.
Paige Desorbo
And she's hilarious. Let's acknowledge that. She is hilarious.
Des Bishop
So funny.
Paige Desorbo
Yes.
Des Bishop
And I know we make a lot of jokes about blonde sometimes on this podcast, but there's just some things that only a blonde can do. Like a gorgeous, drop dead blonde. And I just think Ariana is better suited as a brunette.
Paige Desorbo
I can't wait for the brunette comeback. Sometimes. You know what? You don't miss it till it's gone. And I think that's what life is about. We have to have our different experiences in life to acknowledge we're growing.
Des Bishop
We're growing our struggles, we're learning.
Paige Desorbo
Wait, and also about fashion. Have you heard of the fashion trend Madame Sandler?
Des Bishop
I have not.
Paige Desorbo
Neither.
Des Bishop
It hasn't I come across.
Paige Desorbo
Neither did I. I did this, like, interview with this magazine and they were like, what do you think of Madame Sandler? And then I was like, am I that person that hasn't seen the Tick Tock clips yet? And I was like, I'm Gen Z. So, like, I don't know what you're talking about. But apparently it's like dressing like Adam Sandler, but with, like, a little cunt. Like, so. Like a tight top with, like, a cargo pant.
Des Bishop
So it's like, so kind of like a little Carrie Br. Like, add a little pop of carry.
Paige Desorbo
Yeah. So it's like Adam Sandler, but sexy. And I'm into that.
Des Bishop
I'm into that.
Paige Desorbo
Then we also, for fall, or I guess it's becoming winter already. The frazzled English woman. That's a new trend. So it's basically like you're looking like you just. You threw on all these layers and your scarf is falling off and your hat's falling.
Des Bishop
Who the fuck is coming up with these? I. I'm done. I'm done. Now I've hit my limit.
Paige Desorbo
I think it's AI.
Des Bishop
It's not. I'm not doing a new Persona. Every time someone's having some identity problems and they're projecting.
Paige Desorbo
This is a projecting episode.
Des Bishop
This is like, I can't be all of these things.
Paige Desorbo
Paige, you've always been aware of trends, and I've brought this up before because this is the first year I'm aware of trends. Do you feel fucked with by the industry that they're like, oh, now we're not doing glazed donut nails. Now we have to do glaze coffee nails. And it's like, at one point, are you like, stop fucking with me.
Des Bishop
It's too much stuff with me because.
Paige Desorbo
I like glazed donut nails, and I'd like to continue that.
Des Bishop
I mean, here's. I will say in from a style standpoint, as I get older, I feel like I do lean. I love a trend. I do love, like, trying certain things. And, like, Giggly Squad Live is actually a perfect place for, like, where I'm like, where will I ever wear this? Okay, I'll wear it to Giggly Squad. But in my everyday life, I've just. I've started to feel like I've. I've leaned more classic style because I'm on trend overload.
Paige Desorbo
Yes.
Des Bishop
Like, I. Like, I can't do it anymore.
Paige Desorbo
And I do think sometimes trends can help you learn about yourself. Like, every now and then, you'll see a trend to be like, I fudge with that. Take that. But then leave all the other trends that you don't think is made for.
Des Bishop
You, because then it's too much.
Paige Desorbo
Capitalism wins again.
Des Bishop
And here we are.
Hannah Berner
Nothing kills your will to hit the gym like walking out of work to a dark and chilly night gym or go to my cozy bed. Obviously those are decisions that you have to make. If your bed is anything like mine, the gym is losing 9 out of 10 times. I just I can't do it. That's why you need Alo Moves Alo Moves is the health and wellness app that brings your best workout to the comfort of your home. Whether you've got a full hour to work out or maybe just five minutes, Alo Moves has a class to fit your schedule. And there's more than just fitness. There's also meditation, sound baths, nutrition tips, self care tutorials, and just so much more.
Des Bishop
I love aloe for when I'm traveling.
Hannah Berner
It's just so easy to have it on your phone and sometimes I just need to listen to a sound bath.
Des Bishop
And take a minute for myself.
Hannah Berner
So it's no surprise that Alo Moves is an award winning app. They have everything. Yoga, pilates, strength workouts from beginners to advanced. And you can do it anywhere. So go to alomoves.com and use code giggly20 for an exclusive 30 day free trial plus enjoy 20% off an annual membership. That's alomoves.com with code giggly20 for a 30 day free trial and 20% off an annual membership. Alomoves.com code giggly20 this episode of Giggly.
Des Bishop
Squad is sponsored by BetterHelp.
Hannah Berner
November is all about gratitude and I'm.
Des Bishop
Always so thankful for my friends and family around this time. But also, I don't think we thank ourselves enough. Here's a reminder to send some thanks to people in your life, but also to take a moment and thank yourself for everything you've accomplished this year and pushed through. It's sometimes so hard, especially around this time of year, to make time for yourself, and it's also a perfect time to start therapy. If you haven't, and if you've been thinking about it for a while, then this is is your sign to give BetterHelp a try. It's entirely online, designed to be convenient, flexible and suited to your schedule. All you have to do is fill out a brief questionnaire and get matched with a licensed therapist. You can switch therapists at any time for no additional charge. It's a hectic time of year for everyone, so take a moment to do something for you, thank yourself and give better help a try. Let the gratitude flow with BetterHelp.
Hannah Berner
Visit betterhelp.com giggly squad today to get 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelp H L P.com giggly squad okay, if you're looking for a gift.
Des Bishop
For yourself this holiday season.
Hannah Berner
Or maybe someone else. I'm going to tell you about the set of sheets that I've been slowly trying to get out all my old sheets and replace with Cozy Earth. Cozy Earth's sheets. I. I really actually can't explain them to you, but just know this. Anyone who's gotten in my bed recently, Craig, my mom, my friend Stephanie, have all said, what are these sheets? And they're Cozy Earth. Cozy Earth's goal is to help you create a sanctuary within your home, a refuge from the demands of the outside world. And they understand the significance of finding comfort and tranquility in our hectic lives. Your 5 to 9 should consist of relaxation, rejuvenation, unwinding and embracing a sense of calm. With Cozy Earth, you can transform your space into an elevated haven where serenity and renewal intertwine effortlessly. I have their bamboo sheet set and let me just tell you, I've never felt sheets like this. I can't explain to you the fabric. They're so soft, but also at the same time like so cozy and lightweight. It truly is this like small luxury that really does change a lot of your life. I mean, you're restoring your energy when you're sleeping at night. You should have the coziest sheets. So wrap the ones you love in luxury with cozy earth. Visit cozyearth.com giggly and use our exclusive 40 off code giggly to give the gift of luxury this holiday season. That's cozyearth.com giggly if you get a post purchase survey, say you heard about Cozy Earth from Giggly Squad podcast.
Farnoosh Tarabi
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Paige Desorbo
Can I say one thing about the male population?
Des Bishop
I'd love if you did.
Paige Desorbo
Have you thought about when people get married, how men are Mr. They're always Mr. Whether they're married or not. But once you get married, you are not Ms. Anymore. You are Mrs. And it comes from the old school concept that, like, women. Women are only of value.
Des Bishop
I love. Wait, hold on. I love when you're telling a fagged. And like, your voice changes a little. Like, if it's.
Paige Desorbo
It's my teacher voice. I love the.
Des Bishop
Yeah, like, I love the inflection of a fact. You know, it's like, this really happens in this hour. Yeah, but we do want to differentiate.
Paige Desorbo
Take out your notebooks, kids, because today I'm about to teach you about life.
Des Bishop
Now you're like, if Ms. Frizzle grew up.
Paige Desorbo
By the way, someone said they yassified Ms. Frizzle. Like, the way she looks now. She, like, she doesn't even have curly hair. She has, like a snatched waist. Did you see that?
Des Bishop
Now that'll bring me to tears. I have seen it. It's so. It's so unbecoming. It's so. It's not right.
Paige Desorbo
No. Like, when did she get a keratin treatment on her hair? What was wrong?
Des Bishop
No, I'm like, why did you guys do that?
Paige Desorbo
No.
Des Bishop
Yeah. I'm like, Ms. Frizzle made every wacky art teacher. Like, my favorite teacher.
Paige Desorbo
Yes. Normalize the frazzled art teacher for fall as a trend, don't brush your hair. So, yeah, when we get married, we have to change our front of our name to Mrs. Because women's value is intrinsically if we're married to a man or not.
Des Bishop
Hold up on that fact.
Paige Desorbo
No, but it's important for society.
Des Bishop
Women's value is what? Women's value is what? Intrinsic.
Paige Desorbo
I lost you. I don't know where that came from. I have a stomach bug right now, and you're literally. I'm about to shit myself. Like, I am holding my butthole by a thread right now. I'm holding on by thread. I'm saying that. Why do we have to know if women are married or not, but we don't have to know if men are or not? Because it affects women's status to know if they are married or not. Because. I'm sorry.
Des Bishop
100%.
Paige Desorbo
Why does my husband stay Mr. But suddenly I have to it to Mrs. Cuz. Suddenly I'm more of value cuz I'm married. Actually, a lot of the time your husband makes your life worse.
Des Bishop
Well, statistically that.
Paige Desorbo
So my thing is, I'm done. I'm done with the Mrs. I'm done. We're not doing it.
Des Bishop
I actually. I mean, sometimes I'll see like, miss. Like Ms. Paige Desorbo, but I. If I have to write it myself, I use Ms. Because I'm like, I. They don't need to know my business.
Paige Desorbo
Well, you're.
Des Bishop
They don't need to know if I.
Paige Desorbo
Misses or miss so miss Means you're single.
Des Bishop
It does. I thought it was just like a vague one. I thought M I, S S is single.
Paige Desorbo
I feel like M I, S, S and Ms. Are the same. And then M R. S means you're married.
Des Bishop
Oh, so I've just been playing.
Paige Desorbo
I don't know. I could be making that up, though, because again, when was last time I wrote my name?
Des Bishop
Well, that's true. Well, that's very true. No, I. I complete. I. Yeah, I see that. I mean, but that's. I feel like that's not going away.
Paige Desorbo
I feel like it should.
Des Bishop
You know, I don't want to know if a man is married or not. I don't want to be involved in their issues. Like, I, like, keep me. Keep me out of it. I'm fine.
Paige Desorbo
Why did you write Instagram stories on dms?
Hannah Berner
Oh, my God.
Des Bishop
I just got the Instagram update with the little statuses. Oh, the notes right above your dm.
Paige Desorbo
The notes.
Des Bishop
I hate them. I. Get them out of here.
Paige Desorbo
Well, this is what. I've had them for a while. This is what people don't realize. When you write a little note, it's only to people that you follow. So don't, like, promote your show or like, promote stuff. Think it's going to all your followers. It's not. It's going to your friends who don't care.
Des Bishop
Don't type in it.
Paige Desorbo
Don't.
Des Bishop
It's. I. I hate it.
Paige Desorbo
I actually. But I like it because I learn a lot about people from it. Because I'm like, yeah, if you're a.
Des Bishop
Person, then if you're a person who.
Paige Desorbo
Writes in it too often, who are you talking to?
Des Bishop
Well, here's the other thing. You only see the first four all the time for 24 hours. I'm like, I've seen what you guys have been doing.
Paige Desorbo
Do you know what I realized about my Instagram? I follow 6,000 people. Oh.
Des Bishop
You'Re a freak. That's stimulation overload.
Paige Desorbo
For. Wait, you don't see them? I see the same 40 people every day that I don't want to see.
Des Bishop
Can we talk about people's sexiest man alive? A little front page news action.
Paige Desorbo
So was that just announced today?
Des Bishop
Yesterday.
Paige Desorbo
Oh, John Krasinski.
Des Bishop
Why did I see the version that it was Benny Blanco?
Paige Desorbo
Maybe they were doing a test. Maybe they're doing an A B test. They put out in the public to.
Des Bishop
See reactions or mine was like a fake tick tock because I was like, there's no way.
Paige Desorbo
Also, I just feel like in the current climate, we don't need a People Sexiest Man Alive right now. Who asked for that? I feel like all the girls are like, like, no, thank you.
Des Bishop
You know what's funny is that, like, anything like that for women has been, like, completely scrubbed off the face of the earth. Like, like, like we don't. People don't even do, like a best and worst dress list anymore because it's just like, whatever. But some reason People's Sexiest Man Alive is just like, with stealth withheld, the test of time. It's like, we can't go on unless we know who the Sexiest Man Alive is. Here's the thing. I don't care that it's like, I like it, it's whatever. I don't feel a certain type of way about it. But it's typically someone who's, like, been in the news the past year who's, like, made some type of impact or like, we've seen a movie from them or they've been like, in their public. John Krasinski, who I love, who I actually do find, like, attractive. I don't even. I'm not mad that he's the Sexiest man Alive.
Paige Desorbo
I'm not mad about it. But again, it didn't. It does nothing for me.
Des Bishop
But I'm like, wait, what? Why? What's going on? Like, I was like, did something happen that I missed? It was just a very interesting PR play. Unless he's about to, like, start doing a lot of press and PR because he's, like, working on a project or something.
Paige Desorbo
I mean, I know his wife has been working. I know Emily's been. I was just gonna say I'm glad that he's getting facials at home. Being the Sexiest Man Alive. While Emily has been working her little butt off changing her whole accent in multiple movies.
Des Bishop
Has she done anything this year?
Paige Desorbo
She did the fallout thing with Ryan.
Des Bishop
Oh, yeah.
Paige Desorbo
And then she was on Oppenheimer and then she'd do the whole press tour for that. She's busy. But I'm glad. Oh, my God. Oh, my God, you're livid. Yeah. Wait, I'm trying to think who I wouldn't be mad at. And also John Krasinski. I've not. Like, I literally. I've seen no Elevator once. Tall. Love them. It's just like, we could do more. I feel like sexist Men Alive. Like, Give me something that gives me a guttural feeling, like, give me someone. Give me an old man.
Des Bishop
Here's the thing. I actually. Why wasn't it Killian Murphy? Hello.
Paige Desorbo
It's funny. Immediately I was like, Kelly Murphy, Paul Mescal, literally. Pick any of them.
Des Bishop
Yeah, give me one of them.
Paige Desorbo
Also, give me someone who's like, junk resents. He's. He was funny in his show, but, like, where's the guy who's like, who's has a good personality?
Des Bishop
Give me someone Gen Z that's, like, about to be the next generations. Brad Pitt. Give me someone who, like, I'm about to watch grow. Not like.
Paige Desorbo
So they put that guy role model, which was. Which was random. And I don't. I don't really know who he is. It was.
Des Bishop
I have no idea.
Paige Desorbo
It was very. It's very random. But he had a funny, like, TikTok about how, like, he's like, all these guys don't need this. I do. He's like, no one's even gonna tell Harry Sty. His publicist won't even tell him if he wins this. Name one man.
Des Bishop
If Billy Eichner literally found me on the street, I would die. Name one man.
Paige Desorbo
You know who I think is hot? Jonathan Bailey from Wicked.
Des Bishop
Now. Why the heck now here, now I'm. I'm. I stand with the music theater folk. Why the fuck was it not Jonathan Bailey? There's a few gay men in. Over the course of my lifetime, a lot in real life, honestly, that. That I have found out that they were gay, and my heart has literally shattered. Jonathan Bailey is one of them. That I'm like, wait a minute. So you're saying there's a 0.0 when there's a. As a female. Like, if you see like a super hot guy, like a Matthew McConaughey, you're like, yes. He's like, happily married. He's so hot. Like, there's a zero chance that I would ever marry Matthew McConaughey, but zero is still like a fine for me.
Paige Desorbo
Zero's still on the board.
Des Bishop
When it's 0.0, it's a different kind of hurt. It's like, oh, they wouldn't even look at you.
Paige Desorbo
My current gay crush. I would sit on his fucking face.
Des Bishop
Who is it?
Paige Desorbo
Cooper Koch?
Des Bishop
Oh, no. I feel the same way.
Paige Desorbo
But it's so easy for gay men to put on straight voice. And then it's so funny that they have to, like, dumb themselves down to be straight voice. You sent me that TikTok. This guy Was like, okay, I want to try to do a straight voice. And he's like, what's up?
Des Bishop
He like, he's like, I'm going to do a straight voice while I'm ordering Chipotle. And he just says the word bowl. And it's so fucking funny. He's like, can I have a bowl?
Paige Desorbo
Wait. Also, people don't talk about how the sh. What's. What is the guy with Ariana. What's his name?
Des Bishop
No, you phrased that perfectly. What is the guy with Ariana? He did an interview. I said, what.
Paige Desorbo
What's his name? What is his name?
Des Bishop
Does it matter? Does it matter? Well, I have no idea.
Paige Desorbo
That is a man who made a very smart decision. And he said, look, just on the street, no girls coming up to me. But in musical theater, where I'm the only straight guy, I am Brad Pitt.
Des Bishop
This man had a whole ass wife and newborn child.
Paige Desorbo
I envisioned that him and Ariana had a Martha Stewart moment where Ariana was like. You know, we were all singing Wicked, and it was so beautiful and emotional and everyone was crying, and I just thought, I'm gonna make out with that man. I think that's what happened. I think music, they fell in love with the music and then fell in love with each other.
Des Bishop
And that's why I don't trust it.
Paige Desorbo
Yeah. And you ever fall. People have said, like, sometimes you fall in love with people. People fall in love with you because, like, you love what they do or you. You want to be them. Like, do you. Do you want to be them or do you love them? And I think sometimes you fall in love with someone because you want to be them, and then you realize, I don't want to be them. And then you fall out of love.
Des Bishop
I saw a thing on TikTok and it said, leos fall in love with people because they like that they like them.
Paige Desorbo
That's me.
Des Bishop
Yeah. And I'm the opposite. I fall in love with people because I like that they don't like me.
Paige Desorbo
No, wait, that's so funny. Because people, I. I'm like, what'd you say?
Des Bishop
You don't like me? Okay.
Paige Desorbo
I'm so proud of girls who were like, he's cool, but, like, he was boring. Or like, I didn't like his personality with me.
Des Bishop
Mm.
Paige Desorbo
I got that. I'm bringing it. I got it already.
Des Bishop
Yeah.
Paige Desorbo
All I need.
Des Bishop
I'll put you on my back.
Paige Desorbo
Is for you to see me as this, as the light that I am. And the second you see me, I say, I don't care if he's so fucking dumb. He saw me, which means no one else sees his genius. And if I'm the only one that saw his genius. And that's another level of mental illness that I have to work on.
Des Bishop
But, yeah.
Paige Desorbo
Now for the sex portion of the show. We've been saying this on stage, which is so funny because we've been asking guys about their favorite sex positions, and we started to realize, like, there are sex positions for me, at least. I will only do, like, third or fourth time we hook up just to, like, secure the bag.
Des Bishop
Yeah. Get the energy thrown in there. Yeah.
Paige Desorbo
Like, I'm doing reverse cowgirl.
Des Bishop
I'm showing you what I'm capable of, but I'm not making a habit of it.
Paige Desorbo
Yes. And during it, you remember why you don't do this all the time and why you save it.
Des Bishop
Yeah.
Paige Desorbo
And once you do it, you're like, oh, I'm not going to do this for a couple months. Thank God.
Des Bishop
Yes.
Paige Desorbo
But, like, people who are like, oh, it's Wednesday, 6:00pm Long day at work. Let's just.69. That's crazy behavior. That's crazy. That's overstimulating. That's.
Des Bishop
No one's ever come home from a long, hard day and said, you know what? I'd like to. What could make me the most uncomfortable while having to pretend that I love it.
Paige Desorbo
Do you know what's wrong with our sis? I mean, there's a lot of things wrong with our society, but one thing is we only talk about sex when it's the beginning of meeting someone. Like movies, books. It's always the sex in the beginning, which is like, yeah, you want to hump each other all the time. Let's discuss the sex of three years in. And people try to be like, oh, yeah, three years in. Like, we don't fuck anymore. It's not that either. It's something else that no one talks about, which is. Look, it's. It's. It's more complicated. It's more nuanced.
Des Bishop
It's more complicated.
Paige Desorbo
Also, there's. There's the sex where you don't even kiss anyone. Why?
Des Bishop
When I.
Paige Desorbo
You don't even kiss.
Des Bishop
When I picture. I never kiss during sex. Even in the beginning, you go, you.
Paige Desorbo
Gotta pay more for that. If you want tongue, you gotta pay more.
Des Bishop
That's not for me. It's not for me.
Paige Desorbo
All the guys in the Midwest.
Des Bishop
This is not for me.
Paige Desorbo
All the guys in the Midwest like to do missionary so they could hold eye contact.
Des Bishop
Paige is upset that that made me deeply uncomfortable.
Paige Desorbo
Gave you a uti.
Des Bishop
There's a time and place for us to hold eye contact sexually. And it's never in nowhere. Like, I. It's once in a blue moon. Okay. You're, like, feeling so inspired to be in love.
Paige Desorbo
Yeah.
Des Bishop
Great. But, like, most often, don't look at me.
Paige Desorbo
Do you know what my toxic trait is? Because I'm a Leo. Lights on, baby. I go, if we're gonna do it, if we're gonna do it, let's.
Des Bishop
No, I'm. I'm a. Lights on.
Paige Desorbo
Your lights on.
Hannah Berner
I get.
Des Bishop
Well, here's the thing. I have vision problems, like, already to begin with. Like, I can't. I get dizzy pretty easily. I can't be changing lighting.
Paige Desorbo
Yeah. I don't like when it's like, oh, let's have sex, Turn off the lights and find me. I'm like, I'm not playing hide and go seek right now.
Des Bishop
Like, no. If anything, that's freakier because God knows what I'm doing with my face when I know someone can't see it. Like, I am wilding out here. Like, it's not.
Paige Desorbo
I like to know where he is in the room. Like, I don't trust you. Like, I need to keep tabs on you. I'm not. We're not hiding in a dark room and then trying to find each other, chasing each other around the room.
Des Bishop
Absolutely not. Absolutely not.
Hannah Berner
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Des Bishop
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Des Bishop
Okay, we were on tour this week. Did anything. I'm trying to think of anything.
Paige Desorbo
Wait, can I Can I throw you under the bus? Like I suppose I learned something about you that I didn't know on stage because we get Q and A's and every now and then I'm like, mom, they know that. Do you remember the towel question?
Des Bishop
It's a learning process for us.
Paige Desorbo
The towel question, they asked like, about cleaning towels.
Des Bishop
This is something like, do me and Craig. Do me and Craig. Was it do me and Craig share.
Paige Desorbo
Do you guys share a towel? And you responded with, I've the wildest answer I've ever heard in my life. And I, but I didn't say that at the time. I supported you in public.
Des Bishop
You supported me in public.
Paige Desorbo
And I. Now we're in private and I need to discuss hey, what you mean.
Des Bishop
Because I actually, I actually wasn't even aware of my actions in that moment were offensive to anyone. So I'm glad that you're bringing it up the environment personally to me. I consider myself a relatable, down to earth person. Okay, Let me first and foremost say that when it comes to towels, I am rich. Okay? My bank account has no bounds. The limit does not exist. I am spending money on towels. So if a person comes into my home and they say, hey, I need to grab a quick shower, no problem, I've got a towel for you. In fact, I've got, got seven towels, one for each day of the week. Because on certain days I'm a two towel girl and that's just how it is. I, I don't pay.
Paige Desorbo
I'm going to stop you right there. Just to confirm, you have a towel for each day of the week for yourself.
Des Bishop
Correct.
Paige Desorbo
So after you put, you wash, you dry yourself, you put the towel in the dry, in the hamper.
Des Bishop
Not, not always if it's a, if it was a light wash day, like if I felt like, like if it wasn't a spray tan day and there's nothing on the towel, I'll hang that baby up.
Paige Desorbo
Okay, okay, okay.
Des Bishop
I'll use her tomorrow.
Paige Desorbo
I'm seeing some sanity because spray tan.
Des Bishop
I'll use her tomorrow.
Paige Desorbo
Okay?
Des Bishop
Now the real problem that we would have to address here because this is much deeper than I. This is, this is, this is generational. Growing up, my mother said, hey, dinner's over, it's time for your bath. And I went upstairs and I took a bath. I used a towel. That towel was chucked. Who knows where that towel went? That's a home of four people using different towels every single day. I don't know what towel ring this bitch was running, but that's how I grew up. It was it was fresh towel, fresh shower, fresh day.
Paige Desorbo
Now, I appreciate that Kim has gone above and beyond as a mother, and I'm not about to be judging McJudgerstein because now I'm realizing I was conditioned. You were conditioned. It's not your fault. But also, I am on the other hand, where I'm like, does this towel still smell? Okay?
Des Bishop
I don't identify with you.
Paige Desorbo
And then I think, oh, my God. If I have to put the towel in the wash, it's going to take forever to dry. And do I want to deal with that admin?
Des Bishop
Not at my house. Not over here. We got towels for days.
Paige Desorbo
They're just so thick. And then you know how you have to redo the whole dryer again because the towel is moist? She's like, I. I can't.
Des Bishop
I. I literally. I have no fucking idea what you're talking about. I don't have. Here's the thing. I have alleviated towel mishaps from my everyday.
Paige Desorbo
So has Craig ever used your towel?
Des Bishop
I'm sure, but it doesn't matter because if then he used it after that, it's probably go, I'm not using it anyway. Oh, two uses. I look at it as, oh, two uses out of that towel.
Paige Desorbo
How often do you do laundry that really.
Des Bishop
We're really getting to the nitty gritty.
Paige Desorbo
It's always on. It's like a white noise machine. It keeps me calm.
Des Bishop
It depends because, like, being on tour, our schedules are just like, so such mayhem. When I get home from, like, a leg of tour, I'm doing whatever laundry is in my suitcase and in the hamper. And then it's building up until I get back from, like, that next leg. So I'm probably doing laundry like, once a week. Like, right now, I am doing laundry, like, currently. Like, my washer and dryer are both going, but I like to leave for tour having no dirty laundry. That's what my goal is. Every time I leave for a leg of tour, there's no dirty laundry.
Paige Desorbo
If you go out to dinner wearing jeans and you're out for like, four hours, no dancing. But good heavy gossip, like, you know, the heart rate got up.
Des Bishop
Yep.
Paige Desorbo
Are you washing those jeans?
Des Bishop
No. Here's the other thing. I don't wash. I'm only washing my pajamas, my sweats, my towels, my underwear. Am I rarely. I'm rarely washing, like, clothes.
Paige Desorbo
Yeah, she goes. After I wear a dress, I throw it away.
Des Bishop
Unless I sweat in, like, a turtleneck or like, a T shirt. I'm washing my T shirts. But like, okay, like my tour outfits, like my blazers, all that. Like, no, I'm not, like, washing that. I'm not washing my jeans.
Paige Desorbo
Well, you also don't.
Des Bishop
I'm washing my jeans like once a month. I also don't sweat.
Paige Desorbo
And for anyone who is wondering about my medicinal wipes that I was. Oh, yeah, give him. I haven't really been using them because I don't believe in them. Or Bluetooth.
Des Bishop
No, no. Hannah said something wild the other day that she doesn't use. Hannah, what was it? We were in the airport. I said, hannah, I have to draw the line. It's 2024. That's. It was like a ballpoint pen. It was something so archaic that like, everyone's been using for, like, probably 30 years. And Hannah's like, I don't trust it. I don't. The science hasn't backed it. It was something so crazy. I have to.
Paige Desorbo
You know what's crazy? She was just like, I don't remember our show in Ohio. Like, I can't find it in my.
Des Bishop
Brain, but you want to know? It's crazy. I am like that with, like every event in my life. Unless you tell me what. Unless you tell me what I was wearing and I can recall. At least I can, like, find one memory from it. And so from Ohio, I know that my dress broke.
Paige Desorbo
Oh, my gosh. Okay, let me tell you guys, early on, her button pops off, but she's fine. She's not moving. She's in the chair the whole time. She's fine, but she's looking at me like the world is over. Also, there's another button that's securing the dress. Like her dress isn't wide open.
Des Bishop
Yeah, like I'm not naked.
Paige Desorbo
She's not naked. It's just the sparkly button she liked on it that was there pretty much purely for just style.
Des Bishop
I wore. I wore the wrong pair of boots yesterday. I forgot to put the correct boots with an outfit. And then I went and took to took a picture. The self loathing that happened that night that I put the wrong boots on, it changed the whole course of my evening.
Paige Desorbo
Oh, you wore the wrong boots in one of these last shows?
Des Bishop
No, I. Yesterday I had to take a picture for something and I wore the wrong boots. Not the wrong boots for like a brand or anything. Just in my own head, I wore the wrong boots and I'm like. And now I'm gonna post this picture and I'm gonna know that I have the wrong boots on. That would have made the outfit so much better. But the people won't know that. And it's changed my whole. I can't stop thinking about it.
Paige Desorbo
Okay. And I love that you're spiraling over that right now, because sometimes we take external things that we're stressed about and we put it into something that we find more familiar. Also, I would argue that change. Change your perspective. You say, you know what? Why are we saying it's worse? Maybe it's better.
Des Bishop
It's not, though, because I have eyes and I can look at the picture in the outfit.
Paige Desorbo
Well, I can't wait.
Des Bishop
Okay, finish your. What was this your original thought? I don't know.
Paige Desorbo
Oh. Oh. I was saying when I was. You guys, I've been having liquid diarrhea for three days. I have nothing left. I watched oh, my crazy.
Des Bishop
My dress broke in Ohio, and I.
Paige Desorbo
Was, oh, yeah, sorry, your dress broke. Ohio girl upset. Next day, she is uppity on stage. Like, Paige is like.
Des Bishop
We're interacting.
Paige Desorbo
Actually, I'm gonna. I'll take this joke. And she's. She's. She's riffing. She's like. She's like. At the point where I was just enjoying the show, I sat back, I was laughing.
Des Bishop
I was.
Paige Desorbo
I said, who is this girl on stage right now? Not that she isn't always hilarious, but she had a spunk to her. And I literally, on stage, called her out. I was like, you're killing it right now. Are you okay? Like, I was like, did she take a new beta blocker? Like, what's going on?
Des Bishop
Yeah, like, had I doubled up?
Paige Desorbo
And she looks at me and she goes, oh, I love my outfit tonight. And I was like, you, simple you. All you need is to just like your outfit. And suddenly she's singing the Star Spangled Banner on stage.
Des Bishop
Here's the thing. When I'm a simple gal, people want to always put all these things on me. Oh, she's high maintenance. She's a bitch. She's blah, blah, blah. I'm a simple, simple girl. I'm just a girl. When I put. When you go shopping and you see a top that you like, you say, oh, I really like that top. I'm going to buy that. Because I know that I would wear that topic top. Sometimes you're not thinking what you're going to pair that top with. So the top comes in the mail, you look at it and you say, what do I have in here that I could put together with it? And when I find the most perfect ensemble of something that I wasn't even pre planning or buying to Go with a specific item. The joy that sparks in my creativity and I feel like so accomplished. I'm like, oh my God, that looks so fucking cool. And I just did that in 10 minutes. I take that with me, everyone.
Paige Desorbo
Not to call you a hypocrite, but the Wicked fans are furious right now because they're like this bitch is coming for me. For being so happy about a three hour movie and a musical that's been one of the best selling for years. And this bitch just put together a top and a bottom. A matching set arguably that goes together. And it made her like. And it made her. Do you know the demons I'm fighting in my own mind? Justice for Wicked. Justice. Ariana Grande. I wish that putting a top and a bottom that kind of look cute together would erase all my anxieties. I wish it could be that peaceful up here.
Des Bishop
I left Toronto show being like, do I need beta bloggers?
Paige Desorbo
Is that a placebo effect?
Des Bishop
Did I just have to remember the fuck I was. Everything is relative and it's all perspective and nothing is real.
Paige Desorbo
Not to be negative, but I find when something horrible is happening in my life, the only way I truly get over it is for something hor else horrible to happen. Cuz then you will forget about the other horrible thing cuz you're too fixated on the normal thing. And that's called moving and grooving. That's called just keep swimming. But I like that with you it's like just keep trying on another outfit each day and one of those outfits is going to inspire you to live life to the fullest. Oh but I. While I was bleeding from my butthole yesterday.
Des Bishop
Yeah.
Paige Desorbo
I watched crazy. My crazy ex. I think it's okay. It's not my crazy ex girlfriend which is a great show. Also this is like a documentary thing. I get hesitant when these documentaries come out. True crime that are like five different seasons about a certain topic. Because I'm like, I don't know why aren't they on their own? Like are they too weak enough stories to not be on their own? Why are we doing this?
Des Bishop
Yeah.
Paige Desorbo
When I tell you each story brought it. When I tell you these exes.
Des Bishop
Oh like each episode is a different.
Paige Desorbo
My gosh. Just a girl sitting there or a guy being like. So I met this person out of Wendy's and. And then it's the most insane story you've ever heard in your life. Like people getting framed for. For stuff they didn't do. Going to jail because their ex.
Des Bishop
Do you know that that's one thing that, like, in my childhood that I was really afraid of in my adulthood. Like, I thought people were gonna be out here framing each other way more often. Like, I was really scared of being friends.
Paige Desorbo
You know why? Because it was really easy that you used to frame people because they didn't have DNA. I'd be so scared in the 80s. They just had to be like, she done it. That's what they did with the witches in Salem. They were like, she did it. She's a witch.
Des Bishop
I just feel like people don't talk about. Like, there had to have be. Had to have been, like, a lot of fleeing. Like, if some. Like, if someone in Salem was like, you're a witch, I'd be like, okay, and I'm out.
Hannah Berner
See ya.
Des Bishop
Going to the next town.
Paige Desorbo
There are a lot of, like, eye contact. Like, don't say it. Don't say it. Does it. You're a witch. God damn it. Now I need to go to Seattle.
Des Bishop
Yeah. It's like, I didn't want to journey right now, and I have to journey.
Paige Desorbo
But also, is there some peace knowing that back then you could just, like, flee and then no one could contact you? Like, now I go anywhere and I still get a text from that one person from high school who's fucking annoying?
Hannah Berner
No.
Des Bishop
Could you just, like, go to a different state and change your name and no one would ever know? Yeah, that sounds fucking amazing.
Paige Desorbo
I feel like you could. We could do that in Europe if we wanted to. I mean, we almost did it in Toronto this weekend.
Des Bishop
I literally almost stayed. Freaking loved Toronto.
Paige Desorbo
We had some drama with Chicago a little bit.
Hannah Berner
We did.
Paige Desorbo
The Italian food was really good. We did make a comment about the pizza.
Des Bishop
Here's the thing. I respect all of your states and where everyone is from. That doesn't mean I'm not allowed to have my own opinions. I was booed in the middle in the Midwest at multiple shows, and I stuck by my statements at each show.
Paige Desorbo
I like, respect you more because I would have folded a cheap beach chair. I would have been like, yeah, whatever you guys want.
Des Bishop
Here's one thing. I'm not a fair weather. Like, you can't just sway my opinion. And you think I'm gonna go with your group? Like, I will stand on my own if I need to stand on my own. And something that I am standing 10 toes down on is. What are they called?
Paige Desorbo
Centos down on. I was gonna say Dutch oven pizzas.
Des Bishop
Oh, my God. No, the Midwest, that.
Paige Desorbo
Oh, cheese curds.
Des Bishop
Cheese curds. I said that cheese Curds were basically a mozzarella stick in a different form and people were, well, this is the thing.
Paige Desorbo
I, I can't support you in that because you haven't gotten the full experience of cheese curds. And the way they're made is like cheese gets curdled and they like grab it at a certain point in the cheese curling process. It's like really women in stem stuff that like you haven't had the full.
Des Bishop
I need to give it another go. I need to. And I, and I'm open to learning.
Paige Desorbo
More, but as an Italian, that was hilarious.
Des Bishop
I thought so too. My thing with Chicago Pizza deep dish, if I need a fork and knife, I gotta go, gotta go. To me, pizza is an on the go meal.
Paige Desorbo
And also if it's not foldable, it's cake.
Des Bishop
I didn't ask for a dish with my pizza cake.
Paige Desorbo
It's pizza cake.
Des Bishop
And I'm allowed to have that opinion. And other people are allowed to love Chicago deep dishes for. It's not for me particularly.
Paige Desorbo
One more thing about documentaries, someone did message me and it's, I think I do a pretty good job at this. We're like, I'll give people kind of the idea of the documentary. I won't give away any like big surprises or anything or sometime look, regardless, I talk a lot about documentaries.
Des Bishop
One girl was like, I love, I love when you do your documentary stuff because here's the thing, bitch, I'm not watching it. Why the fuck would I watch it when my other half has already watched it, dissected it, put it in MLA format and is going to give it to me. Give it all to me badge. I want to know the end goes.
Paige Desorbo
Hey, when you say your documentaries, can you please not give away what happens?
Des Bishop
And I was like, you're like, sorry, I have a really dumb friend on the other end of the line.
Paige Desorbo
No, but my thing is also like if you didn't know that Ted Bundy killed all those women, like that's history. Like, I'm not giving away a made up story. Like, just Google it, it's there. So like I will try not to give the way of documentaries but sometimes like people just know, like JonBenet Ramsey wasn't found. Like, I'm not drop, I'm not dropping a bomb on people.
Des Bishop
You're not dropping it.
Paige Desorbo
Yeah.
Des Bishop
That's how I feel about talking about Grey's Anatomy. It's history, it's her story. And I'm not living in your reality. Like in my reality, I'm on season. I'm on season 13, and all the main best people already died, so cut your freaking losses.
Paige Desorbo
It's literally the Red Wedding in Game of Thrones. Is Craig watching Grey's Anatomy with you?
Des Bishop
No. Has zero interest in it. And I'm. I love having a show that I know that there's 21 seasons that no one's bothering me about. I can skip whatever episodes I want to skip. Sometimes there's a musical episode, and you know what I say, absolutely not. Next episode. I don't care what even happened on that one. If you're singing about it, it obviously wasn't that traumatic or serious or a part of the plot line, so. See ya. Something about network TV doing a musical episode. What, did you guys run out of ideas? Are you on holiday? Like, get your shit together.
Paige Desorbo
How mad were you about Glee?
Des Bishop
Never watched it. Never watched a single second of it. Want to know something crazy? Craig's favorite show in high school. I said, you have problems.
Paige Desorbo
Can Craig sing?
Des Bishop
You know what? He's actually not bad.
Paige Desorbo
I'm surprised.
Des Bishop
Like, does he sing?
Paige Desorbo
I'm surprised he doesn't have a cover.
Des Bishop
Hannah. But now. Hannah, do not manifest insane debauchery in my personal life, because that's. Now you're directly coming for Craig. If something like that were to arise.
Paige Desorbo
Him and Austin, I would be in.
Des Bishop
Europe with a new name.
Paige Desorbo
Austin Charleston 5.
Des Bishop
Oh, Hannah, stop. This is not funny. It's not even funny to joke about.
Paige Desorbo
Wait. I love how you're like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Oh, God, no.
Des Bishop
I couldn't do it. I couldn't do it.
Paige Desorbo
Well, I'm trying. I was trying to think of a band with two men, I guess. You too, Millie Vanilla.
Des Bishop
I'll take your word for it.
Paige Desorbo
Des can actually sing too, but he doesn't.
Des Bishop
Here's the thing. We can't. You can't tell them. Like, I've never commented on Craig singing. So, like. And if I did, you're opening a whole can of worms for me that I am not ready.
Paige Desorbo
Well, we've been dissecting the trauma and drama of men who, like, play guitar for girls when you're trying to go back to their place. And they, like. And our biggest thing is, like, they wouldn't do that to their boys. If you wouldn't do that to your boy, don't do it to your girl. Because we're vulnerable. We're scared. We don't know what's going on. We're in your territory. You've taken out a weapon, a guitar, and we're forced to sit back. So it's like, you don't see these guys hanging out with their friends at, like, 2am being like, hey, can I play this song that I thought of? They would never do that.
Des Bishop
If I were to bring a man back to my apartment and push my interest onto him, you think he's gonna stand in my closet and try an outfit on that I've been waiting to picture on a human, but I just don't have enough energy to put it on myself? I'm like, hey, what are your sizes again?
Paige Desorbo
You bring him back and you put on more clothes. You're like, hold on one second. I'm gonna undress to. To have more clothes on. Do you. What do you think about this?
Des Bishop
I'm like, wait, I'm having a creative vision, and I feel like this skirt actually warrants, like, a different top.
Paige Desorbo
We just want to call the date. Okay, you guys, thank you for gigging with us. I didn't myself once during this podcast, which is a miracle. I think we're on the up. We're going to Texas tomorrow. Do you have your Texas outfits planned yet? Are we wearing. Are we wearing boots?
Des Bishop
Here's the thing. I've. I am up on UPS tracking right now, waiting. My outfits fucking come in.
Paige Desorbo
I'm waiting too.
Des Bishop
If they all come in. I think there's only, like, one that I'm, like, iffy about, but okay, we're gonna. We're gonna work through it, and this is just. This is my job, and I have to buckle down.
Paige Desorbo
We're gonna buckle down, and we're so excited to see y'all in Texas. Also, I just announced some new working it out shows of new material where I try new jokes on people in Alabama, Irvine, California, and. And Timonium, Maryland. To Timonium. Timonium, let's go. We love you guys so much. Thank you for giggling with us. We hope we gave you an hour of light happiness. Giggle Mafia. We love you. Someone tagged us in that, calling us Giggle Mafia, and we can't stop calling ourselves that. And that's that.
Des Bishop
See ya.
Farnoosh Tarabi
Bye.
Giggly Squad Episode Summary: "Giggling about Wicked, Winter Trends, and Projection"
Hosts: Hannah Berner & Paige DeSorbo
Podcast: Giggly Squad
Platform: Acast
The episode kicks off with Hannah and Paige sharing candid updates about their life on tour. Paige humorously apologizes for the podcast being a day late due to her battling a stomach flu, mentioning, “[02:30] I have to formally apologize. The podcast is late by a day. [...] I have a stomach flu.”
Hannah echoes the challenges of maintaining appearance while touring, stating, “[03:13] I can’t look pretty this many days in a row. My makeup just wouldn't even go on my face anymore.”
Paige and Hannah delve into the intricacies of maintaining their friendship amid the pressures of touring. Paige remarks on their constant proximity, “[03:48] We've also gotten so insanely close. It's not good for humanity.” They discuss the hectic schedules and lack of downtime, highlighting how it affects their interactions and creative processes.
A significant portion of the episode revolves around their views on musical theater, specifically the long-running hit musical Wicked. Des Bishop (Hannah) shares her past experience attending Wicked for her sweet sixteen, expressing indifference, “[07:16] I took one of the longest naps in the history of my napping career. Didn’t see a single second of it.”
Paige counters by expressing her lack of exposure to Wicked, saying, “[07:55] I haven’t even seen the story of it.” This sparks a discussion on personal preferences versus popular acclaim. Des Bishop reflects on her initial disinterest but shows openness to experiencing it, “[08:36] I'm for sure gonna watch it on my couch. Like, I'm gonna throw it on and see what the hype is about.”
Transitioning to fashion, the hosts discuss current winter trends. Paige introduces the "Madame Sandler" trend, describing it as “Adam Sandler, but sexy,” to which Des Bishop responds positively, “[15:59] So it’s like, Adam Sandler, but sexy. And I’m into that.” They humorously critique the overwhelming influx of fashion trends, with Des Bishop lamenting, “[16:06] It’s not for me. It’s not for me.”
Hannah and Paige examine the role of social media in modern life, particularly focusing on Instagram's features like Stories and DMs. Paige comments on the oversharing nature, “[25:01] I have a stomach bug right now, and you’re literally. I am holding my butthole by a thread right now,” illustrating the often absurd extremes of online behavior.
Des Bishop highlights the superficial interactions, “[26:31] It depends because, like, being on tour, our schedules are just like, so such mayhem.”
The hosts engage in a spirited debate about the announcement of John Krasinski as People’s Sexiest Man Alive. Paige expresses indifference, “[27:48] I feel like in the current climate, we don’t need a People’s Sexiest Man Alive right now. Who asked for that?” while Des Bishop criticizes the choice, “[30:23] I have no idea.”
They discuss alternative choices, with Paige humorously suggesting Jonathan Bailey from Wicked, “[31:02] You know who I think is hot? Jonathan Bailey from Wicked,” and Des Bishop agrees, championing representation from the musical theater community.
A lighter yet relatable segment involves the hosts sharing their laundry routines and towel etiquette. Paige brings up the infamous "towel question" from a Q&A, leading Des Bishop to elaborate on her personal system, “[42:02] I am spending money on towels. So if a person comes into my home and they say, hey, I need to grab a quick shower, no problem, I’ve got a towel for you.”
Paige humorously contrasts her own laundry habits, “[46:31] How often do you do laundry really. It’s always on. It’s like a white noise machine. It keeps me calm.”
The conversation shifts to their experiences with documentaries and true crime series. Paige critiques the inundation of multi-season documentaries, “[53:10] I watched crazy. My crazy ex. [...] I don't know why aren't they on their own?” while Des Bishop expresses frustration with spoilers, “[57:30] I was like, sorry, I have a really dumb friend on the other end of the line.”
Reflecting on their tour stops, Hannah and Paige recount memorable moments from Toronto and Chicago. Des Bishop shares an incident where her dress broke, creating on-stage drama, “[48:04] I have nothing left. I watched oh, my crazy.” Paige humorously supports her, “[50:11] Do I need beta blockers?”
They discuss the challenges of performing in different cities, with Paige poking fun at Chicago’s culinary offerings, specifically cheese curds, “[56:12] I can't support you in that because you haven't gotten the full experience of cheese curds.”
As the episode wraps up, the hosts prepare for their upcoming Texas show, discussing outfit preparations, “[62:05] We're going to buckle down, and we're so excited to see y'all in Texas.” Paige announces new shows where she'll test new material in various locations, expressing enthusiasm and affection for their audience.
Paige DeSorbo (02:30): “I have to formally apologize. The podcast is late by a day. [...] I have a stomach flu.”
Des Bishop (07:16): “I took one of the longest naps in the history of my napping career. Didn’t see a single second of it.”
Paige DeSorbo (15:39): “I think it’s like Adam Sandler, but sexy. And I’m into that.”
Des Bishop (16:06): “It’s not for me. It’s not for me.”
Paige DeSorbo (27:48): “I feel like in the current climate, we don’t need a People’s Sexiest Man Alive right now. Who asked for that?”
Des Bishop (42:02): “I am spending money on towels. So if a person comes into my home and they say, hey, I need to grab a quick shower, no problem, I’ve got a towel for you.”
Paige DeSorbo (53:10): “I watched crazy. My crazy ex. [...] I don’t know why aren’t they on their own?”
Des Bishop (56:12): “I can’t support you in that because you haven’t gotten the full experience of cheese curds.”
Paige DeSorbo (62:05): “We’re going to buckle down, and we’re so excited to see y’all in Texas.”
In this episode of Giggly Squad, Hannah and Paige offer a blend of humor, personal anecdotes, and candid discussions on topics ranging from the pressures of touring and the cultural phenomenon of musical theater to the overwhelming surge of fashion trends and the quirks of social media dynamics. Their playful debates and relatable stories provide listeners with an authentic glimpse into their lives, all while maintaining the lighthearted and self-deprecating humor that defines Giggly Squad.