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Ari
Okay, have you ever been in a relationship and you kept having unwanted doubts like, do I love them enough? Am I really happy? What if God has someone better for me? And those questions felt impossible to ignore. And suddenly you're repeatedly praying for certainty or signs, constantly comparing your relationship to others, asking friends what they think over and over, and you can't find peace no matter what you try. Unwanted relationship doubts can feel so real and scary. But here's what's important to know. Thoughts like this can be a sign of relationship ocd. Unlike the stereotypes about being organized, real OCD is a serious condition that can latch onto anything we care about. Relationship OCD creates this never ending loop of doubt and anxiety followed by behaviors you do to try to feel better, but the relief never lasts. But OCD doesn't have to take over your relationships because it's highly treatable with a type of specialized therapy called exposure and response prevention, or erp. And that's why I wanted to tell you about nocd. NOCD is the world's largest OCD treatment provider and all of their licensed Therapists specialize in ERP. Therapy with NOCD is 100% virtual, covered by insurance, over 138 million Americans and includes support between sessions. Their therapists are extensively trained, deeply understanding, and ready to help you reclaim your relationships. If any of this sounds like you or someone you care about, visit nocd.com and book a free 15 minute call to learn more about how NOCD can help. That's nocd.com this episode is brought to
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Ange
Hi guys, I'm Ange. Oh, we haven't done a. I know. We haven't done an intro in like years. And I'm Ari and, and this is Girls Gone Bible. We're a faith based podcast where we talk all things spirituality, mental health, the Bible. We love Jesus so much and we love you guys so much. What's up, Bar?
Ari
What's up, Ange? Yeah, we just got back from tour. I was just telling Ang that it's so crazy how anxiety can manifest because my anxiety used to manifest of like racing thoughts and I couldn't think straight and now I didn't even realize that I was. It was anxiety. It's almost manifested in my body and the way I'm self numbing with the phone and stuff like that. And so we got back from tour and I just, I like, I was talking to my mentor and she was like talking me through it. It's so important to have mentors, guys. And I have an incredible mentor and she's actually taking on people right now.
Ange
Yeah.
Ari
So if you want, I can leave information in the description box. But she, I was talking to her and she's. No, she goes. It's funny because God will often test you with the things that you preach about.
Ange
Oh, I say that literally all the time.
Ari
And I was like, yeah. Because on tour I preach about how just reach out to him in your hardest moments when you feel anxious, you don't need to do anything, just reach out. And I've been having such a hard time doing that. Yeah. And so I just spent last night just laying on my floor, just reaching out. I was like, let me take my own advice. And there's just such a peace that happened with doing that. You think that you are obviously it's okay once in a while to like be on the phone, but you think you're just like helping yourself by scrolling.
Grand Canyon University Announcer
Totally.
Ari
And it just numbs you out and makes you feel worse 100%.
Ange
Because the thoughts are still there.
Ari
Yeah.
Ange
Everything you're avoiding is still there when you stop. And then that's why you go back. It's like addiction. It's like anything else.
Ari
Yeah. And so if I can just give you guys advice, it is to try your hardest just to get off that phone and be in the presence of God and call a friend and confess what you're feeling and just get it out. Because it, it heals.
Ange
Yeah.
Ari
So I've just been resting the past couple days. It's been really nice to just rest. We underestimate rest.
Ange
We don't take it seriously enough. I know, I know.
Ari
But yeah, that's what's going on with me.
Ange
I had a similar moment, but like the best moment this morning I woke up and I got in the secret place. I like put on my incense. I did like my whole routine, everything that I do, I turn on a candle, I light an inc. Turn on a candle, I light a candle, I turn on an incense, I get my bible out and I'm like worshiping and I'm having a really good time. And then, and then I start to get like a little bit restless. And so I like, I like get up and. And I'm starting and I'm like praying in the spirit. I'M walking around, but then I start getting a little bit annoyed that I was restless. So I start talking to Jesus. So, honestly, I'm like. I'm like, okay, so what do you want me to do? Like, if you don't want my mind to trail off, like, then tell it to stop trailing off. Like, you have the power to do that. I literally. And then I would sit down again. I would try to read, and then I would get annoyed, so I'd. I just, like, wasn't feeling what I wanted to be feeling. I was so restless, my mind was, like, kind of swirly. And so I kept getting up. And then I would, like, go to my phone, check what time it was, have the impulse to, like, just, like, get on my phone and start my day and try to spend time with them later. And then I would go back. Like, literally, I was wrestling, going back and forth in my living room. I wish there was a camera. And then I start to get so bratty that I go. I'm like, okay, so, Jesus, if you don't want to come, then don't come. Like, if you don't want to, that's fine, you know? And I was like, what in the. Like, abandonment? Weird. What do you. What are you even saying? But it was so honest, and I was just, like, speaking out loud. And then I start going, like, you know what, Jesus? I'm just mad. Like, I'm. I'm mad at you. No, I'm not mad at you, but I'm just mad. And then I just, like, keep talking. And it was like, the messiest secret place anyone has ever seen. There was nothing, like, powerful or what, like, would look powerful or whatever. And then eventually I'm like, you know what? I'm gonna stop doing this. This is like, I'm not getting where I want to get to. So let me just read, and I'll just read. So I take my Bible, and then I go and sit on my couch, and I'm about to start reading, and then I go, oh, I swear, this is literally exactly what happened. I go, oh, I can only love because you love me first. I didn't even let you love me.
Ari
Oh, my God.
Ange
I put out my hands like, this are. I'm not even kidding. I put my out my hands, and I go, lord, I let you love me for no good reason. I can give you nothing. I can do nothing. Like, I. I allow you to love me for no reason whatsoever. And then I imagine Jesus, like, filling my body with his presence. I imagine Jesus hugging me, and then I just, like, go through this visual experience. Are. Guys, I swear. I know. I don't swear because we don't swear. I promise. I literally go. My eyes are closed. The power of God comes down on me, literally like a weighted blanket. This heaviness, this, like, actual, like, it. Like it was the tangible presence of God comes on my body. I can't move. I can't open my eyes for, like, 30 minutes. Peace. Like, actual. Like, I encountered the tangible peace of God. And it came after an hour of running around striving and struggling and be. And. And like, you know, having, like, a wrong view of Jesus. Of, like, why aren't you here? Like, what are you doing? Like, what's going on? Why do I feel like I am here? No, I know. And it's just like, I. What I got from that the most was one, the. You have to receive God's love before you can have, like, some sort of exchange with him.
Ari
Yeah.
Ange
Like, if you don't receive him loving you for no good reason, you. You won't get to where you want to get to.
Ari
Yeah.
Ange
And two, lingering. I used to. I talk about this all the time, about how lingering in the presence of God is the most important thing. We so often get in the secret place. We're reading, we're praying, whatever, and we cut it too short. There were so many times where I was getting restless that I was like, okay, I've had it. Like, I can go start my day. I'd go to my phone, I'd go to the kitchen, and then I'd come back. Because I'm like, no, there's more. Like, there is more. And I don't always do that. And today, because I lingered and I waited and I stuck around even when it wasn't comfortable, I encountered Jesus in a way that I haven't in a little while.
Ari
Yeah.
Ange
You know what I mean? So I say all that to say it was the most special morning. And I just wish there could have been a camera on me being like, okay, so, like, if you don't want me to be thinking about other things, then stop it.
Ari
Were you saying it out loud?
Ange
Yeah. Oh, yeah. I look like it was.
Ari
So you're just, like, flipping out around
Ange
your house, walking around the house, going, okay, so what? Like, I don't know what to say to you right now. It was so fun.
Ari
What were you wearing?
Ange
Was I wearing pajamas?
Ari
Would you hear, like, this, probably. We're going to read the Story of Hannah. I'm excited for this one. It's short, but it's so beautiful.
Ange
Such a good story, basically. Just a little summary of this. So first Samuel, second Samuel. Samuel is the prophet in the Old Testament, where he was the one who anointed David as king. He was the prophet. I'm sorry, he anointed. Yeah, he anointed Saul as king and he anointed David as k. And Samuel's story in the Bible is such a profound. Like, you need to. We say it all the time. We'll say it again. You guys need to read the Old Testament. You need to get all these stories in your mind and your body and your heart, because it is profound the way that they point directly to Jesus. But Samuel was a prophet who anointed Saul. He anointed David. He is such a key part of, like, Israel's whole history. And Samuel was a good man. He was an exemplary man. He did right by the Lord. He was righteous. And Samuel is a man that, like, you look at in the Bible and you say he did so much right. He did a lot of things right. And what we're going to see in this story, basically, to give you guys an overview. There's so many different lessons in this story, but one of the greatest ones is about the waiting season that we talk about a lot, where God does things in such divine timing. Just like you look at Elizabeth and Mary having their boys, John the Baptist, Angie, Jesus, at the same time. Elizabeth was waiting for children for such a long time, but the Lord had to get her pregnant at the same time as Mary so that Jesus and John the Baptist could be alive at the same time to fulfill God's will. And this is another story where our girl Hannah is barren. She's not having children. It's so painful. It's so devastating. But the whole point of this is that the Lord needed to get Hannah pregnant during the right time so that Samuel could be in the right place at the right time to anoint Saul, to anoint David to live the life that he needed to live. And it's just such a good lesson for all of us. There was a man named Elkanah who lived in Ramah, in the region of Zuf, in the hill country of Ephraim. He was the son of Jeroham, son of Elihu, son of Tohu, son of Zoof, of Ephraim. Sorry, guys. This is of Zoof, of Zoof, of Ephraim. Alkanah had two wives, Hannah and Penina. Peninnah had children, but Hannah did not. Each year, Elkanah would travel to Shiloh to worship and sacrifice to the Lord of Heaven's armies at the tabernacle. The priests of the Lord at that time were the two sons of Eli, Hophni and Phinehas. Phinehas. I can't. On the days Elkanah presented his sacrifice, he would give portions of the meat to Peninnah and each of her children. And though he loved Hannah, he would give her only one choice portion because the Lord had given her no children. So Peninnah would taunt Hannah and make fun of her because the Lord had kept her from having children. Year after year, it was the same. Peninnah would taunt Hannah as they went to the tabernacle. Each time, Hannah would be reduced to tears and would eat. Why are you crying, Hannah? Alkana would ask. Why aren't you eating? Why be downhearted just because you have no children? You have me. Isn't that better than having 10 sons? It is so like a man. It really is. It's so. No, it's so like a man. Oh, man. Sorry, guys.
Ari
That one.
Ange
That one always gets me when I read this story. Okay, keep going.
Ari
Once, after a sacrificial meal at Shiloh, Hannah got up and went to pray. Eli, the priest, was sitting at his customary place beside the entrance of the tabernacle. Hannah was in deep anguish, crying bitterly as she prayed to the Lord. And she made this vow. O Lord of heaven's armies, if you will look upon my sorrow and answer my prayer and give me a son, then I will give him back to you. He will be yours for his entire lifetime. And as a sign that he has been dedicated to the Lord, his hair will never be cut. As she was praying to the Lord, Eli watched, seeing her lips moving, but hearing no sound, he thought she had been drinking. Imagine the one place you go to to pray and you have someone calling you, calling you drunk. I know the one place you feel safe. Must you come here drunk? He demanded. Throw away your wine. Oh, no, sir, she replied. I haven't been drinking wine or anything stronger, But I am very discouraged, and I was pouring out my heart to the Lord. Don't think I am a wicked woman, for I have been praying out in great anguish and sorrow. In that case, Eli said, go in peace. May the God of Israel grant the request you have asked of him. Oh, thank you, sir. She exclaimed. Then she went back and began to eat again, and she was no longer sad. So Hannah is getting absolutely tormented, as if she's not going through enough with not being able to have children. She's watching Penina have these kids, all of these things while getting tormented. But you never see Hannah repaying evil with evil. She's not trying to defend her stuff. When I read this story and how she's getting tormented and how she does nothing but goes to the tabernacle to pray, it just reminds me so much of Jesus because he never tried to defend himself when he would get ridiculed and all these things. And so I just love that so much. It just shows us that the way God will vindicate you when you keep your integrity. I love that she never tried to do anything to her. She just prayed. And so I just. That's such a good lesson for us all.
Ange
Yeah.
Ari
And I, and I and I'll just read a couple scriptures in Psalm 27. The way he will raise you up when you just remain silent and let him fight your battles, he truly does reward your integrity. For in the day of trouble he will keep me safe in his dwelling. He will hide me in the shelter of his sacred tent and set me high upon a rock. Then my head will be exalted above the enemies who surround me. And then in Exodus 14, verse 14, it says the Lord will fight for you. You just need only to be still. And when I read the story of Hannah, she really was so still through this. She didn't try to fight back. She didn't try to hurt her. She just prayed. And that's such a good lesson for all of us that when we go through these things, when we feel tormented or bullied or whatever is going on, where you just feel like you're in a situation that feels very unfair, it's a great lesson to be still and pray to him because he really does fight your.
Ange
Yeah. So beautiful.
Ari
I love the part where she has this moment which was so inspiring for me even because even as a kid when I think about I have this thing with myself where and I talk about this all the time, but I have a hard time being honest in my prayer time. Like when I was going through my heartbreak and all of the stuff. Like I. It was so easy for me to just pour out and cry out. But I have this things still that I'm working through that because God had saved my life and I even think about my own father and my mother. You're smart enough to know when something's not working. Like when you can't focus at work, when you're dragging by at 2pm or when your stomach feels like it's fighting you after every single meal. Here's the thing. These aren't random symptoms, your gut impacts and everything from your digestion to your brain function to your energy levels. That's why I love Just Thrive Probiotic. Unlike other brands that make big promises but fall apart in your stomach, Just Thrive is the only probiotic clinically proven to arrive in your gut 100% alive for you. That means real results like better digestion, healthy immunity and more energy to tackle your day. But don't just take my word for it. Try Just thrive probiotic for 90 days and see how much better you feel. It comes in capsule or a berry flavored gummy and if you don't notice a difference, they'll refund every penny even if the bottle is empty. For over a decade, Just Thrive has been helping thousands of people take control of their health with science backed solutions you can trust. From their award winning probiotic to their full line of gut, immune and brain health supplements, Just Thrive is ready to help you live your healthiest Life. Start your 90 day free risk trial today at just thrive health.com GGB and save 20 off your first order. That's justthrive.com promo code GGB be the best you with Just Thrive. Get your health in check and save 20 off your first order at just thrive health.com GGB
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Ari
You know how the Bible talks about the last days being marked by people being anxious, distracted, overwhelmed and just carrying so much. And I think sometimes God will use even the smallest things to get our attention. Like our bodies being exhausted, our minds racing at night, not sleeping well, waking up tired and realizing okay, something has to change because rest is not Just a luxury. Rest is something God cares about. Honestly, one of the simplest ways we've been taking rest more seriously is by upgrading our bed with bowl and branch. Sometimes we think we need a whole new routine, a new mattress, a sleep tracker, supplements, blackout curtains, all the things. But sometimes the thing affecting your sleep is literally what is touching you every night. Boll and Branch makes everything your bed needs. Their signature organic cotton sheets, pillows, blankets and comforters are breathable, incredibly soft and designed to get better over time. And you feel the right away, the sheets are so soft, the bedding feels cooler and more breathable, and your bed just feels more peaceful and inviting at the end of the day. A lot of people start with the signature sheets and then add the waffle blanket, the pillows, the comforter to make the whole bed feel so complete. And honestly, when your bed feels better, your sleep feels better. And when your sleep is better, everything feels a little bit more manageable. Sleep cooler this summer with Bolen Branch during their annual summer event. For a limited time, get 20 off site wide@bolinbranch.com GGB with code GGB that's BolinBranch B O L L A N-D branch.com GGB code GGB to take 20 off bolandbranch.com GGB code GGB exclusions apply, like, because they of. How do I put this? Like, I'm a dweller. Like, I'm like, no, I don't need to complain. Like, I've been like this since I was younger. Like, I'm like, I don't need to. I don't want to complain. I don't want to, you know, so it's hard for me to be honest all the time, right? And I have this thing in the back of my head that I can't be honest because I'm like, no, like, he saved my life. It's fine, it's fine. But the more you hide your pain, the more like myself, it builds up and builds up. Like, I feel so much anxiety in my chest lately because I haven't been honest in my prayer time. I haven't been in that place of messiness and realness. And so it's almost like it's really stored up in my body. And then I had that moment finally yesterday after being distracted on my phone and not dealing with it, of this release. And so it's just such a good lesson that you don't need to have these perfect prayers to come to your father. It's about honesty and realness and messiness and that's where he meets you. And that's when the real healing starts. And so there is truly a peace that is released when you come to your father and you cry out and that bitterness and that messiness, like you were saying that. That just honesty.
Ange
I am. There's this book, Abba's Child. So there's this book, in the first chapter, talks about. One thing about me is I love. I buy a lot of books and I read the first chapter. She doesn't read any books.
Ari
No, I don't know why. I don't know why you buy them.
Ange
I read the first, first, first and second chapter, and then I don't read anymore. But there's so much that I gain in the first chapter. Anyways, Abba's Child is this book. Whatever, doesn't matter. So Abba's Child, basically, the first chapter, the one I read, talks about a false self and like an authentic self. And he literally talks about Brennan Manning, literally talks about how you can. God cannot meet a false self. He can't meet an inauthentic self. He can't meet a veneer. He can't meet a mask. Like, if you want God to encounter you, to touch a part of your heart, you have to show it to him. You have to reveal it to Him. He simply. He can be as. He's sovereign and he's big and he can do whatever he wants. But when you are in relationship with Jesus and you are asking him to, like, reach parts of your heart that need reaching, you have to give it to him. You have to open it up. And I feel like even when we say that, it's like, okay, so what does that mean? Like, how do you open yourself up literally? Just what Ari's saying, what I said earlier about my time with Jesus, you have to have a conversation with him. You have to have a conversation. I think we can make the secret place and prayer, like, I think that's why so many people don't pray, because we think that prayer needs to be this, like, really religious, like, traditional, structured thing that we do when really it's a conversation. And I feel like there's so many people who need to remember that a prayer literally looks like, hey, Jesus, I'm feeling sad and I don't know why. Can you reach into my heart, give me a vision or a thought or. Or an understanding in my heart of, like, what is the rooted. What this is rooted in? And, like, watch Jesus move that way. But when you don't open yourself up to it, it's. It's he's not going to get in there. So I just think that's really important to know that he can't meet a false self. He can't meet a version of you that's like, this is what I'm supposed to say in my prayer time. So this is what I'm saying. It's not what he wants. Like he wants your heart, the deepest, most authentic parts of your heart and
Ari
just being reminded of who he is. And maybe that means going back to that psalm that we had a whole episode about. Because I think 103. Yeah, yeah. Because I think we just all forget the love and the compassion of Jesus and how he is not like anyone else in this whole other, in this whole world. His love isn't like anyone else. And so when we can comprehend that even just a little bit, we're able to open up and be real.
Ange
Yeah. And remembering just so that you guys hear it because it's probably something that you know, but you need to hear consistently.
Ari
I know, I do.
Ange
I know literally God loves us so much. He just wants to talk to us. There's nothing we can do to make him love us more or less. The sound. Imagine this when you wake up in the morning, the sound of your feet like pitter pattering to get to your living room and then the sound of your voice calling out to Jesus is what he like waits for that. Like he's obsessed with that. It's what he wants more than anything. We have to stop treating Jesus like he's this angry dad who we've disappointed. That's not who he is. He cares so much. He cares about my life. He cares about your life. He cares about your guys life. He cares so much about the smallest details of our lives. He's big enough and he's so big to like what you just talked about, how you feel bad, you feel guilty when you ever complain or anything. Like yeah, scripture talks about. He doesn't want us like mumbling and grumbling, murmuring to one another and complaining a bunch. But complaining to Jesus, that's literally what he's there for. You know what I mean? Like to process and release and get it out. And like when we talk to people, you should use wisdom and cut, like if you and I have an issue, I don't want to come to you with like all of my thoughts that are undone and like not thought through and be like, here, take all of this, that's not wise with another person. But that's exactly who, what we should do with Jesus, you don't have to figure it out first and process it all before you bring it to Jesus. No, the point of being in relationship with Jesus is that you word vomit on him and then he, like, filters through it with you.
Ari
Yeah. And I. And I'll say one more thing about that. We hear so much about the voices, and what do I do about those condemning voices? And so in the mornings, even if you hear those voices, speak it out loud. That's not what you would say. Exactly. Like, instead of making it this, like, tense thing of like, oh, my gosh, I'm getting condemned. Laugh about it.
Ange
Yeah.
Ari
And say it out loud and get it out. Because you know the voice of God will never condemn you. That isn't God. So just get it out. And it loses its power.
Ange
So good. Why. Why is it such a universal thing of, like, we just all have so much shame. Like, genuinely, we all have so much shame. That's why. And it manifests differently for all of us. Like, we feel different things, we experience it differently. But, like, our. All of our struggles of getting into the Secret Place and getting into the presence of God, it's all rooted in shame and feeling like we're not good enough and feeling like we don't deserve to be there. And. And, yeah, it's just, like. Just know you're not alone. Like, if it's hard, like, when you first get saved, you guys, there is a honeymoon period with Jesus where you're getting rocked and wrecked, and it's amazing. And. And, like, you're so sensitive, and then you develop, and you're not a baby anymore, and you're not drinking milk, you're eating solid food. And that's where faith develops. Like, when I was in the Secret Place this morning, and I was like, I don't feel good. This isn't fun. I feel restless. I don't feel like I literally said to Jesus this morning, like, I don't know how to seek you. Like, all I've ever done in my relationship with you is seek the face of God. And I literally sense, like, I just feel like this season is like we're relearning how to seek in a different way, you know? And you never get to a place. Like, it's just always. You're always maturing and always learning new ways in how to seek Jesus and spend time with Him. So just don't have any shame. If you struggle, we all struggle.
Ari
Yeah. You know, and it literally just. I'm gonna say it one more time. When you sit down, say you are someone who loves me more than anyone else in the whole entire world could possibly love me.
Ange
Yeah.
Ari
How could I not pour my heart out to you? You have to remember that 100% and.
Ange
Yeah.
Ari
And anytime you hear a voice or a thought you have about. You can't say this literally say out loud, now, is that what a good father would do? Is that how a good father would think? Because he is the best father in the whole entire world.
Ange
Yeah.
Ari
And he's not condemning his. His children.
Ange
I know. He loves us. He's obsessed with us. When you close your eyes to pray before you say anything, imagine Jesus hugging you and saying, I love you so much.
Ari
You know what's really helped me? I have this photo. It would be. If you guys don't have a photo printed, go on Pinterest and find some kind of photo. I have this one photo that I have in my closet, and it's me. It's the back of my head and Jesus. And we're sitting on the beach and I have my head on him and I look at it and I just smile and I just have so much peace. It's so good to even picture something like that. Have a picture and of you and him and just lie there and soak in that.
Ange
You have it in your closet?
Ari
Yeah, because I go in my closet and I shut the door.
Ange
That's cute.
Ari
That's how she looks. You know, My closet in my room. Yeah. Then we see Hannah, and she's in deep anguish and she's crying out in her honesty. And she says to him, oh, Lord, if you answer my prayer and you give me a son, then I will give him back to you. He will be yours for his entire lifetime. A sign that is dedicated to the Lord. That is so beautiful. Because what she wants is not for her. It's for the Lord. It's for the kingdom. It's for something bigger. And when your prayer, life changes, heaven reacts different. And I know that because I relate to this so much with my purpose. Because with my purpose, I spent years crying out bitterly, just like Hannah. All I wanted was purpose. I just wanted to have something for myself. And so for years, I just struggled in the entertainment. And then I talk about this a lot. But that when that prayer changed, when I had found Jesus and going from, I wanna be an actress, Please, like, help me book a role. Help me do this, to how can I serve you? I promise I will serve you for the rest of my life if you give me a purpose that honors you. And so when we Change that prayer, even if it is for a child, like, lord, I want a child, your will be done. Maybe if it's some way of adopting or whatever you want, but your will be done. And so I love that because everything she's praying is never about her. It's for the glory of God. And I think that's beautiful. And I really relate to that. And as soon as I started praying like that, that's when God started to
Ange
intervene in my life 100%. You're praying the prayers that are on God's heart, like the ones that are aligned. The scripture that says, when Jesus says, whatever you ask in my name, it will be done for you. I think something that people need to know is that when we say in Jesus, it's not saying. It's not like on a postcard, like, being like, love Angela, in Jesus name. We are saying in Jesus's name, in his power, in his will, in his being. His name is himself. He, like all of who he is, is represented in the name of Jesus. Yeshua Yahweh, like, so when we are praying in Jesus name, we're not saying, okay, here's what we want, and then Jesus is going to do it for us. We are praying. And in the name of Jesus, we are standing in the person of Jesus, praying the heart or praying the prayers that are on Jesus's heart in Jesus name. And so when he says, when you ask for anything in my name, it will be done for you. So he's not saying, if you ask me for a Range Rover, but you say in Jesus name, you're going to get it. He's saying, whatever you ask for in my name, whatever you ask in my will, in my being, in my character, whatever is in my heart, in my name, it will be done for you. And so praying prayers in Jesus name, that should change everything about how you pray. It's not just in the name of Jesus, sign it off. It is in the body, in the embodiment of who Jesus Christ is. I'm praying this because it's what he's praying for as well. And something that I love so much. In this verse, eleven says, and she made this vow. O Lord of heaven's armies, if you will look upon my sorrow and answer my prayer and give me a son, then I will give him back, back to you. This isn't the first time in Scripture that we see somebody surrendering and sacrificing a son to God. We see Abraham and Isaac. We see so many situations in the Old Testament of people giving their firstborn, specifically a son, back to the Lord. And the most profound moment that we see that in is when the Lord himself gives his son Jesus, up, up for the sake of all of humanity. And so I think Jesus the Lord modeled that so beautifully when he gave us Jesus that he did not withhold even his only son. In Genesis 22, the angel of the Lord says to Abraham, now I know that you fear God because you have not withheld from me your son, even your only son. And God did not withhold his only son. And I think that's so interesting that now I know that you fear God because you haven't withheld from me. There is like, a true fear of God, God that is manifested and crystallized within us when we choose to not withhold the things that God is asking for. This is one of the hardest parts of the Christian walk, is to truly give up to control.
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I.
Ange
We don't say this in a way that's like, yeah, you should already be doing this. It's something me and Ari actively walk through. It's one. It's something that you see so much in the Bible because it's such a pertinent part of being a Christian is the art and the necessity of giving up things that God is asking us to not withhold, sacrifice and surrender the things that we want and giving it back to the Lord. It's one of the hardest parts of being a Christian. And it's one of the things that we'll be faced with most. Because in this situation, it was Hannah. She said, bless me, and then I'll give it back to you. There's nothing that we have in our lives that we can hold on to so tightly. Because genuinely, I. Those are the things that God is going to ask for back.
Ari
Yes.
Ange
Anything that we are idolizing. Anything that we want more than Jesus. We talk about this all the time, and we'll never stop because this is the Christian walk. It is constantly this back and forth with Jesus of being like, when you love something that much, I'm going to ask you for it, because I'm not going to let you love it more than me. Because that'll destroy you. Yes.
Ari
Oh, yeah. But there's also this beautiful dependency that you see just you. Just you. Just as you read her story, you just see that she never stopped going to the temple to pray. She never. There's something about pain and waiting and suffering. When people hear that Mim Mobile plans are only $15 per month, a lot of people wonder, okay, what's the catch? Well, I can tell you from firsthand experience there isn't one. There are no gimmicks and no gotchas. Just unlimited talk, text and data, fast, reliable coverage on the nation's largest 5G network, and an award winning care team. I guess that makes Mint Mobile a catch. With Mint, our phone bill finally feels light. With reliable service, no extra drama and way more money staying in our pockets. Mint Mobile took what's wrong with wireless and made it right with Premium Wireless. For 15 bucks a month you can even bring your current phone and your number. Choose from 3, 6 or 12 month plans and say goodbye to a monthly bill. Ditch overpriced wireless with Mint Mobile. It's so easy. Sign up online and get three months of premium wireless service for 15 bucks bucks a month. To get your new wireless plan for just 15 bucks a month, go to mintmobile.com GGB that's mintmobile.com GGB Cut your wireless bill to 15 bucks a month at mintmobile.com GGB that'S it. There's no catch. $45 upfront payment required. Equivalent to $15 a month. New customers on first three month plan only. Speed slower above 40 gigabyte on unlimited plan. Additional taxes, fees and restrictions apply. See Mint Mobile for details.
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Ari
That just keeps this beautiful dependence on Jesus. And I just, I love it because if I didn't go through everything I did and still I'd never have a reason to be dependent the way I am. So if you're in a waiting season right now, this is the most precious, beautiful time that you'll look back on and be like, wow, that was the most precious time with Jesus. It kept me so dependent on him.
Ange
And then we move to verse 19 and it says the entire family got up early the next morning and went to worship the Lord once more. Then they returned home to Rama. When Elkanah slept with Hannah, the Lord remembered her plea. And in due time she gave birth to a son. She named him Samuel. For she said, I asked the Lord for him. Remember too, there's a scripture that says, you have not because you ask not. Pray about everything. Pray for everything. Don't feel bad about asking God for things. The next year, Elkanah and his family went on their annual trip to offer a sacrifice to the Lord and to keep his vows. But Hannah did not go. She told her husband, wait until the boy is weaned. Then I will take him to the tabernacle and leave him there with the Lord permanently. Whatever you think is best. Elkanah agreed. Stay here for now. And may the Lord help you keep your promise. So she stayed home and nursed the boy until he was weaned.
Ari
In due time, it says. Yeah, in due time. In God's perfect timing, you have to understand that if you are under God's submission, you're praying fervently, you're doing everything you can. You have to know that you can relax. I can't tell you how perfect his timing is. And sometimes it can feel like. But time is running out. No, it's not. When you are under God's authority, his timing is perfect. There is no wasted time with God. I can tell you that with my own life. Everybody says time is running out. No, it isn't. Like I say this all the time. I feel like my life has just begun. Who cares what the world says about how old you are? There is nothing that God can't restore and do. Time means nothing to him. But I do know that his timing is perfect. And you never want to do anything out of God's will, because you can. If you are impatient, you can go outside of his will. And I can tell you it will be treacherous. And so your only job, if you are in a waiting season of purpose, of waiting on a. On a marriage, a husband, a child, his timing is perfect. You just submit to him, you focus on him, you stay so dependent on him. And in due time, his will for your life will prevail and it will be the best plan for you. That's why I can truly. Just looking at the track record of my life, I know no matter what, no matter what happens, there's things that I really want. But I know whatever he gives me, whatever he doesn't, will be the perfect planned for my life. I know that. I know that because of what my life has looked like.
Ange
Because it's who he is.
Ari
It's who he is. And I just. It's. It's so good to cry out to the Lord and be messy and be honest. But if I can tell, especially the young people, one thing. I spent my whole twenties murmuring, crying, stressing, worrying so bad that I look back and I'm like, oh, man, why didn't I just enjoy my Life. I wish I enjoyed my life. I was like, it's not gonna happen. Nothing's gonna happen. I'm gonna be, you know, And I have so much grace for myself because I didn't have the Lord. But if you can learn from me, don't waste your life complaining and letting your life pass you by because something hasn't happened yet. Because if you submit to him, you pray to him, you're honest to him, you're walking with him, your perfect will will prevail. Just trust me on this. But you don't want to let your life pass you by by complaining and stressing out, because you will regret it a hundred percent.
Ange
And that's something that we all need to hear. And then verse 24 says, when the Ch. When the child was weaned, Hannah took him to the tabernacle in Shiloh. They brought along a three year old bull for the sacrifice and a basket of wine. After sacrificing the bull, they brought the boy to Eli. Sir, do you remember me? Hannah asked. I am the very woman who stood here several years ago praying to the Lord. I asked the Lord to give me this boy. And he has granted my request. Now I am giving him to the Lord and he will belong to the Lord his whole life. And they worship the Lord. There's. And we just want to read this little part. Hannah's prayer of Praise. Then Hannah prayed, my heart rejoices in the Lord. The Lord has made me strong. Now I have an answer for my enemies. I rejoice because you rescued me. No one is holy like the Lord. There is no one besides you. There is no rock like our God. Oh, Lord, I love this part so much. I love. I asked the boy. I am the very woman who stood here several years ago praying to the Lord. I asked the Lord to give me this boy and he has granted my request. I feel like, I don't know, potentially someone needs to hear this like that. There's a mom or moms who have been praying for a long time for their wayward kid to come home, to come back to the Lord, to potentially get off drugs, to maybe even get out of jail. And we just want to say, like, I feel so strongly that the Lord is going to have you be right where Hannah is in this moment that you're going to have a moment where you say, do you remember me? I was the woman praying all those years ago for a boy. And here I am. The Lord answered my prayer. I feel so strongly that that's somebody watching that your child is coming back, coming home, that they will be healed. That God loves your child so much more than you do, believe it or not. I know that doesn't even seem possible. And if there's any moms or dads listening and watching who feels the burden of a child who just needs rescuing, we're with you. And we just pray the peace of God that surpasses understanding to guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. I'm not a parent, neither is Ari. But I know one of the hardest things you can ever go through is that. That. And Jesus is with you in that, and he sees it all. And I'm not going to say everything happens for a reason, because that's actually not true. There's so many things that happen that Jesus hates and shouldn't have happened. And so we just speak that over you, that the Lord is with you in your situation and he's going to do something incredibly special and it's going to blow your mind and you're going to find yourself like Hannah, beautiful. So I. Yeah, I think that this is such an insane moment where Hannah prays for something for so long, and then her initial instinct is to give it back to the Lord. And she made a vow and she kept her vow and everything that we. There's a million ways that we can relate to this text, but I would just say, like, every single thing in our lives, whether it's a job, a friendship, a relationship, a child, whatever it is, like everything needs to be offered back up Jesus. Every single thing. I see so many people who are so stuck in life and, and, and, and it's not always the case that you haven't given, you know, surrendered it to the Lord, but so often it is that you're doing things in your own might, in your own strength, and you're not doing things in Jesus name. You're not doing things in the person of Jesus, in the spirit of Jesus. And I would just challenge whoever is listening that long. Like, being a Christian doesn't just mean that you believe in Jesus. Being a Christian means that you believe and then walk out your belief in Jesus. You believe in Jesus and then you w. By the way, you can't. You can't believe in Jesus without believing in his word. You can't believe in Jesus when you don't follow the things that he's asking you to do. And so many people are going their own way. It's like, it's literally the first sin that ever happened was Adam and Eve went their own way. They chose their own will. And we still do it today. I'm one of them, Ari's one of them, every single one of us. But to truly live a life like Hannah, where she made a vow to Jesus, because it's so easy to say, jesus, I'll give you everything if you do this for me. And then when we get the thing, when it comes, that's not where our heart goes. And we let pride come in, and we let arrogance come in, and we let a million different greed come in. We have to truly live lives that are like, no, everything is for Jesus. Everything, everything, everything. If we want to walk out our lives the way that Hannah did, that she prayed. She was a good, righteous woman who prayed to the Lord, made a vow, and then kept her word with Him. We can really take a page out of her book in this because.
Ari
Great. That's so good. That's so great. And it's such a good.
Ange
Good.
Ari
It's such a good. What's the word like, I can't speak today.
Ange
It's such a good testament. I don't know.
Ari
Yeah, it's such a good testament, too. When you were saying that, I was just thinking, some of you have been so blessed with children, blessings from God, but you're in such complaint and looking at things you don't have. And so it's such a good thing to look at and feel thankful today.
Ange
Yeah.
Ari
God has blessed you so much. Maybe it's not kids, but it's with purpose or something. And it's just good to be like, write down things that he has given you that you can feel so grateful for. Because so many of us can be so stuck in complaint and forget what God has truly done for us.
Ange
100%.
Ari
It's a good. It's honestly good for me to even hear that right now.
Ange
Yeah, me too.
Ari
Let's write down a listen of all of the things which is. Will go on for years, but some things lately that God has blessed you with. If you are in a moment right now of depression or anxiety, of just kind of, and you feel stuck, write down a list of what he's blessed you with and say that out loud. Thank you, Jesus. I did that this morning. I just started thanking him for everything, and all of a sudden, peace was released. I started to feel joyful. I had been speaking so much about. About speaking life. It's okay to be weary and to feel stuck for a minute, to be honest. Yes. But don't stay stuck there. I love this part in Hannah's prayer because I love when she says, my heart rejoices in the Lord. The Lord has made me strong. There's something about when you have waited and been in grief and been ridiculed and your circumstances were so against you for so long, and then you get that thing and it just makes you appreciate it so much more. And I almost, like, I used to look at people that would have all these things and, you know, and it's so beautiful. But I'm almost so happy that I had such a long waiting season because I appreciate it so much more and I never take it for granted. And I almost feel like even in my waiting season now, when I am in a relationship, how much I will appreciate it because I've been in such a long waiting season.
Ange
100%, you know. Oh, yeah.
Ari
And so you just see how real the Lord is through your waiting season. And I love that she says that the Lord has made me strong. He makes you. He changes you in your waiting season. It's someone that you would never be if you didn't wait, if you didn't go through all the trials, if you didn't go all through all the circumstances and grief. You know, I'm sure that it wasn't in the perfect will for her to go through such torment from that woman, but look at what God did. He rose her up and she became so strong for it. So don't let it be the very thing that just makes you feel at such a place of defeat. Keep crying out and staying dependent and praying to him because he will rise you up. He sees you. He sees you in the season of just defeat, and he will rise you up 100%.
Ange
And I think too, like, what is most, most interesting to me again about this story, just like with Elizabeth and Mary, is just the timing of it all.
Ari
Yeah.
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And.
Ange
We are all so much more similar than we are different. We are all going through so many more of the same things than we even imagine. Maybe it looks different for each of us, but, like, we're all waiting on something. We're all hoping for something. We're all healing from something. And I think even coming out of the season that I was walking through and like, having my, you know, trust in God at times kind of be just attacked a little bit. This story means so much to me because it just shows me how much bigger God is. Yeah, he's so much bigger, you guys. God literally holds all of creation, the entire universe, the galaxies in his hands like this. How much more does he have our lives in his hands like this? If he has the entire universe. That's, like, one of my favorite things to imagine. Like, if I'm. If this is God and these are his hands, and this is the entire universe in his hands, and we're one little dot. And like, yeah, he created the universe, but he. He created us with, like, the intention of being in perfect relationship with Him. We were created out of pure love. Not. He didn't us. He didn't. He didn't, like, create us for any reason other than he genuinely loves us and wants us and wants to be in relationship with us. And so can we genuinely get to a place where we believe, no matter what has happened, no matter what our lives look like, that God so genuinely cares about us and he is in control and he is sovereign and he does have a plan. And his plan, first of all, is. Is oftentimes can be painful for us, the waiting on purpose. Like, let's not forget that either. How many times in Scripture God talks about how, like, even Jesus learned obedience through suffering. How many times, like, we are taught obedience through suffering. We are made. We are formed into Christ likeness through our suffering and our waiting and our being obedient.
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Even when.
Ange
When it's painful, like, all for a reason. And this isn't like a band aid to put over our suffering. This is the reality that we experience and that we live in. That, like, God purposely does not give us things what we want when we
Ari
want it, because thank God he doesn't.
Ange
Exactly.
Ari
Thank God he doesn't.
Grand Canyon University Announcer
And.
Ange
And then just last thing, like, the divine timing that things have to happen on God's timing. Let's remember one thing. We would mess everything up. Up if we got everything when we wanted it in our time, in our plan, we would destroy everything.
Ari
Yeah. Can you imagine if he gave us what we wanted at the time?
Ange
No. Thank you for not making me a big, famous Oscars actress. I don't want to do that, like, at all, honestly.
Ari
Thank you, God. Yeah.
Ange
When I auditioned for a role in Euphoria. Thank you. And I prayed on my hands and knees, lord, give me this role in
Ari
Euphoria, when I auditioned for Sports Illustrated.
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Yeah.
Ari
I'll just say too, like, this is why obedience is so important in the waiting season, which is so hard, but what are you gonna do? And I know so many people say this, but don't waste it, please. And you can look at Hannah and see that throughout all the years, she prayed fervently. She was dependent on him the whole time. She didn't turn her back on him. She didn't try to do. She just prayed, prayed, prayed, prayed. Stayed so dependent on God. And that is what we all have to do in this waiting season. And you can say, but it's been six years. Like he's forgotten about me. No, he hasn't. Look at Hannah. She prayed years and years and years. You just have to remind yourself. It's just not in his timing. I don't know why, but I can remind myself of the scriptures, that his ways are way higher than my ways and his thoughts are way higher than my thoughts. And so we have to just hold on to these scriptures and hold on to Jesus, like Hannah did.
Ange
How can he forget about you when he's obsessed with you? He created you. He lives inside of you. It doesn't make any sense. Have a right view of God. If he created you because he loves you and he's obsessed with you, and he, like, he orders your steps. He lives inside of you. He knew about your life before you were ever born. Why would he purposely. Just like I don't really care about that one. Doesn't make sense. It's not consistent with the character of God. Okay. He's obsessed with you. He's obsessed with me. And he's obsessed with you.
Ari
He's obsessed with me.
Ange
All right, guys.
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Ari
We didn't.
Ange
We were to finish.
Ari
Stop acting so proud and howdy. Don't speak with such arrogance. For the Lord is a God who knows what you have done. He will judge your actions. The bow of the mighty is now broken. And those who stumbled are now strong. Those who are well fed are now starving. And those who are starving are now full. The childless woman now has seven children and the woman with many children waste away. The Lord gives both death and life. He brings some down to the grave, but raises others up. The Lord makes some poor and others rich. He brings some down and lifts others up. He lifts the poor from the dust and the needy from the garbage dump. He sets them among princes, says places them in the seats of honor for all. The death is the Lord's and He has set the world in order. He will protect his faithful ones. But the wicked will disappear in darkness. No one will succeed by strength alone. Those who fight against the Lord will be shattered. He thunders against them from heaven. The Lord judges throughout the earth. He gives power to his king. He increases the strength of his anointed one.
Ange
1.
Ari
No one will succeed by strength alone. Stop trying to do things on your own strength. Stop trying to fight in your own strength. Rely on Him. Cry to him. It is him that gives you the strength. His strength is made perfect in our weakness. We don't always have to act so strong all the time. Yeah, because it is in that place where we admit where our weaknesses be messy, be honest. Just like. Like Hannah, where he begins to work and heal into your life.
Ange
Guys, do us a favor. Read the rest of first and second Samuel. Please. Read about Saul. Read about David. David is AR's boy. She loves David. Read, read. Can you please read it?
Ari
Please? Let's pray. Lord, thank you for the story that you teach us to lean on you. And today we just lift up the woman whose heart longs for a child. You see every tear she has cried, every prayer she has whispered. And every ache she carries in silence. And just as you saw Hannah in her sorrow, see her now in your compassion and your love. Lord, I pray you would strengthen her when hope feels distant. And you would guard her heart from discouragement and comparison and fear and despair. I pray that you would remind her that she is deeply loved and fully seen by you, regardless of her circumstances. If it is your will, I pray for the blessing of a new life. Open every door that needs to be opened. Bring healing where healing is needed. And let your hand rest upon her journey. May she experience your peace while she waits in your presence in every season. Like Hannah, may she pour out her heart before you and may find comfort in knowing that you hear every prayer. Fill her with faith to trust your timing, your goodness and your perfect plan. Thank you, Jesus.
Ange
Thank you, Jesus. I love you guys so much. Go be with Jesus. Read your Bible. Spend time with him. Let him love you first. Receive his love so that you can even try to love him back. We love you guys so much. May the Lord bless you and keep you. May he make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you. May he turn his face towards you and give you peace. Shalom. Shalom. Love you.
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Hosts: Angela Halili & Arielle Reitsma
Release Date: June 27, 2026
Angela (“Ange”) and Arielle (“Ari”) dive into the biblical story of Hannah (1 Samuel) to explore why God often leads us into seasons of prayer and waiting. Through personal stories, biblical reflection, and practical encouragement, they examine the spiritual purpose behind waiting and how honest, messy prayer is more important than “perfect” faith. The tone is heartfelt, real, and filled with wisdom for anyone feeling stuck, ashamed, or weary in their faith journey.
Angela closing blessing:
“Go be with Jesus. Read your Bible. Spend time with him. Let him love you first. Receive his love so that you can even try to love him back. We love you guys so much.” [60:03]
This episode is for anyone wrestling with doubt, shame, frustration, or a sense of delay. Through biblical wisdom and honest testimony, Ange and Ari remind us: God is most present—and His plans most profound—right in the middle of the wait.