Girls Gotta Eat: The Snack – Benito Bowl, Epic Trolling, and the Craziest Olympic Sports

Date: February 12, 2026
Hosts: Ashley Hesseltine & Rayna Greenberg
Podcast: Girls Gotta Eat (Dear Media)

Overview

This “Snack” edition of Girls Gotta Eat is a rapid-fire, laugh-out-loud rundown of pop culture and sports moments from the week — with a heavy focus on the Milan Winter Olympics, the Super Bowl (“the Benito Bowl”), and the wildest headlines orbiting both. Ashley and Rayna deliver their signature comedic analysis on everything from bizarre Olympic events (double luge, anyone?!) and viral scandals (Penisgate, medal mishaps) to the week’s celebrity gossip, epic trolling (Jordan Hudson, we see you), and the cultural impact of the most talked-about Super Bowl halftime show in recent memory. Expect spicy takes, unfiltered jokes, and no patience for losers (politicians or otherwise).

Valentine's Week Vibes, Friendship, and Tour Life

[00:15–04:12]

• The hosts chat about their Valentine's Day plans — no real romance, but plenty of oral jokes, friend date invites, and a little Galentine's shade.
• Ashley teases a surprise dinner involving a "Himalayan salt rock cave" and commits to some real “couple goals” content.
• Rayna laments LA’s couples culture:

  "This is why I'm moving back to New York. I don't have one friend that isn't in a relationship in LA."
  [02:07, Rayna]

• The two share inside jokes about touring together, confirming Ashley’s unofficial role as Rayna’s tour shadow, with upcoming shows in San Diego, Pasadena, and LA.

Olympic Report: “Skeletons,” Double Luge, & Sex-Position Sports

[04:12–10:19]

• The Winter Olympics in Milan are declared “so chic, so classy,” but the hosts are mostly amazed/confused by ridiculous sports.
• Skeleton:

  "Only men would have invented this. Women would never do something so stupid."
  [05:51, Rayna]

  • Head-first, face-down sledding at high speeds = a big “no” from the hosts.
• Double Luge:
  • Described as “a horny pose,” involving two athletes lying on top of each other, supine, sliding down an ice track.

  "This is a sex position. All you gotta do is pop up and you're in reverse cowgirl."
  [07:03, Ashley]

  • They joke about the possibility of double luge porn.
• Biathlon:
  • Cross-country skiing + rifle shooting.

  "This feels like a man was like, 'I love to ski, but I feel a little gay sometimes doing it, so give me a gun.'"
  [07:52, Ashley]

• The pair are shocked these sports existed for decades without their knowledge, and vow to “get into that double luge” for Valentine’s.

Lindsey Vonn Injury, Olympic Absurdities, and Media Trolling

[10:19–14:16]

• Lindsey Vonn:
  • The US Olympic skiing legend suffered another major injury just after returning to the sport post-retirement.

  "I don’t love anything that much, but I have all the respect in the world…"
  [09:45, Ashley]

• J.D. Vance Booed:
  • Republican senator gets booed at the Parade of Nations.

  "J.D. Vance being humiliated every time he tries to do something is my porn category. Like, that’s my kink."
  [10:45, Ashley]

  • The US broadcast edits out the booing, sparking a chat about media credibility.

  "You’re just embarrassing yourself... It's such loser behavior."
  [39:58, Ashley]

• Olympics “Ice House” is renamed “Winter House” to avoid associations with ICE, blending politics and pop references.

Olympic "Penisgate" & the Horny Olympics

[14:24–17:29]

• Reports of ski jumpers injecting hyaluronic acid into their penises to get more “surface area” for performance — penis filler as sports tech.

  "Having a bigger dick does help you win the Olympics, apparently."
  [16:43, Rayna]

• The hosts double down on the madness:
  • "Women would never… like, hey, you'd be a better podcaster if you injected hyaluronic acid into your clit. I'd be all set, thanks."
    [16:54, Ashley]
  • Penises, condoms, and horny Olympic Village culture are dissected with glee.

Olympic Medals Breaking (?!), National Pride & Real Patriotism

[17:40–19:55]

• Viral clips of Olympic medals falling apart while athletes film TikToks — major medal fail!

  "I thought Olympic medals were, like, not just a clunky piece of garbage from a church carnival..."
  [18:22, Ashley]

• The segment closes with an ode to US athletes persevering through political and cultural strife:

  "The people who were so heartbroken and angry... are the real patriots."
  [19:15, Ashley]

SUPER BOWL HIGHLIGHTS: Snacks, Celebs, and the Benito Bowl

[23:31–31:00]

• Rayna’s Super Bowl party menu (“tried and true” fat-and-carb apps) gets Ashley’s seal of approval, especially jalapeño poppers and cheesy chili beef dip.
• Celebrity Hard Launches & Rumors:
  • Kim Kardashian and Lewis Hamilton spark rumors with a (possibly AI) “kissing photo.”
  • Tom Brady and Alex Earle’s “weird vibe”:

    "I am fighting for my life out here trying to have a crush on Tom Brady... he keeps giving me the ick."
    [28:00, Ashley]

  • Extended riff on Brady being “robotic,” not having game, and the appeal of dating “no name” pro athletes/business managers instead.
• Cardi B and Stefon Diggs Breakup Drama:
  • Cardi B leaves the Super Bowl early, skips expensive party (“elite level petty”), unfollows Stefon on IG, and possibly breaks up with him on game day.

    "You fumbled Cardi and the Super Bowl. That's crazy."
    [33:16, Rayna]

  • The hosts speculate/fangirl: "If you break up with your man while he's on the field at the Super Bowl, that's so bad. Yes."
    [34:34, Ashley]

BENITO BOWL: The Bad Bunny Halftime Show – Iconic, Culture-Defining, and Polarizing

[35:35–46:58]

• Both hosts are obsessed ("the only thing that mattered"), calling it "a movie," "a Broadway show," and "a celebration of music and togetherness" entirely in Spanish.

  “I was watching it like, this is so beautiful, and I’m emotional, but I’m throwin’ ass.”
  [36:56, Ashley] “His only stipulation was that he would not sing in English.”
  [37:16, Rayna]

• 135 million viewers: the most watched halftime show ever; symbolism, inclusion, and the contrast with current US anti-immigrant policies discussed.
• Emotional context:

  "While people are literally being ripped off the streets for speaking Spanish... we are living in two worlds."
  [38:41, Ashley] "The only thing stronger than hate is love." (On-field sign during the show)

• The hosts condemn racist backlash from segments of America, current/former Housewives (shout-out Jill Zarin’s meltdown), and alt-half-time "Tipouse" (Turning Point event) as “loser behavior.”

  “It is so wildly embarrassing to be racist or racist-adjacent… You have no flavor, you can’t dance, your food sucks.”
  [39:58, Ashley]

Housewives Fallout: Jill Zarin Goes Off (and Off the Show)

[41:09–55:30]

• Jill Zarin’s rant against the halftime show is dissected, shocking the hosts:

  “With her whole chest, said, ‘There’s no white people depicted.’”
  [41:35, Rayna]

  • Jill’s daughter and former company distance themselves with statements against racism.
  • Jill is promptly fired from RHONY’s new ‘Golden Life’ reboot.

  "Actions have consequences, and that is the consequence of your action."
  [55:13, Rayna]

MAGA Festival Cancellations & Creed Escape

[56:16–57:22]

• Kid Rock’s MAGA Fest (“Rock the Country”) stop in South Carolina is canceled as artists (including Creed) exit en masse.
  • Soft-spot for Creed: “I will attend and stay tuned for my feelings on Creed.”
    [56:58, Ashley]
• Hosts celebrate artists leveraging their own power: “The only way to stop this administration…is to hit them where it hurts, which is their wallet.”
  [57:22, Rayna]

NOW THIS IS TROLLING: Jordan Hudson’s Epic Move

[61:49–64:19]

• Bill Belichick’s girlfriend Jordan Hudson is declared a “fucking G” for wearing a shirt referencing Robert Kraft's 2019 “massage parlor” scandal, publicly trolling Bill’s nemesis.

  "If you’re not publicly trolling your man’s nemesis, you don’t love him."
  [63:15, Ashley]

• Extended celebration of top-level petty and “let her cook” feminism.

Quick Headlines & Viral Moments

[58:15–61:37]

• Gossip Girl is getting a Blair Waldorf-centric sequel (summer 2027!).
• The disappearance of Savannah Guthrie’s mother, Nancy, is described as "stuff you only see in the movies" and a developing story.
• Ja Rule vs. Tony Yayo mid-flight, pillow-throwing drama:

  “If I saw a pillow flying through the air in a Delta flight and it was Ja Rule… I could die happy.”
  [61:26, Ashley]

Super Bowl Stats, Alt-Halftime Fails, & Toilet Flushes

[45:47–50:52]

• Super Bowl’s “Bushes” (character actors) paid just $1,300 for 70 hours; halftime performer pay is notoriously low.
• New York recorded 761,000 simultaneous toilet flushes right after Bad Bunny's show – proof nobody missed a second.
• Turning Point USA (“Tipouse”) alternative halftime show is roundly mocked:

  “The puppy bowl had more views.”
  [49:10, Ashley]

Notable Quotes & Timestamps

• “J.D. Vance being humiliated every time he tries to do something is my porn category.”
  [10:45, Ashley]
• “This feels like a man... was like, I love to ski but I feel a little gay sometimes doing it, so give me a gun.”
  [07:52, Ashley]
• “Having a bigger dick does help you win the Olympics, apparently.”
  [16:43, Rayna]
• “It is so wildly embarrassing to be racist or racist-adjacent… You have no flavor, you can’t dance, your food sucks.”
  [39:58, Ashley]

Takeaways and Closing Thoughts

• The Milan Winter Olympics are hornier/weirder than ever.
• Bad Bunny’s halftime show is historic, transformative, and unites the “hot people.”
• Racists and their “loser behavior” are torched, with zero patience for whiners like Jill Zarin or the alt-right halftime crowd.
• Friendship, being a supportive tour buddy, and next-level pettiness (Jordan Hudson!) get the GGEs seal of approval.
• Even snacks — from jalapeño poppers to beef dip and wildgrain croissants — are an act of love.
• If you’re not living your most unhinged, loyal, and loving friend life, you’re doing it wrong.

For more: Follow @GirlsGottaEatPodcast on Instagram and TikTok, Ash Hess and Raina Greenberg for tour updates, and stream on YouTube. Share this snack with a friend who missed all the Olympics penis memes!