Falling for Carolyn | Good For You with Whitney Cummings Ep#334

Summary

GOOD FOR YOU with Whitney Cummings | Episode #334 — “Falling for Carolyn”
March 16, 2026
Host: Whitney Cummings
Co-host: Pat (frequent collaborator/sidekick)

Episode Overview

In this episode, Whitney Cummings dives into the internet’s current obsession with Carolyn Bessette-Kennedy, exploring why certain iconic women are continuously mythologized. The show uses a signature combination of stand-up-style riffs, cultural commentary, absurd digressions, and neurotic dissection of both public figures and universal human behaviors. Whitney and her co-host Pat meander through topics like collective irrational fears (Y2K, AI), celebrity quirks (DJ Khaled’s candle hoarding), pratfalls as existential comedy, the psychology of beauty icons, and the Kennedy family’s morbid burial logistics. The tone is irreverent, self-aware, and packed with tangents that eventually circle back to the questions: Why are we so fascinated by Carolyn Bessette-Kennedy, and what does this reveal about fame, femininity, and collective memory?

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Nostalgia, Irrational Fears & Generational Panic (01:23–06:15)

• Whitney opens the episode lamenting missing out on earlier, 'cooler' cultural eras, and pokes fun at generational panic over technology.
  • Makes a satirical connection between Y2K hysteria (fear that computers would malfunction at the turn of the millennium) and today’s AI anxiety.
  • “I’m coming out as a Y2K right now.” – Whitney (03:54)
• Commentary on how each era has its own version of doomsday freakouts.
  • She notes people freaked out about elevators, the Mayan calendar, and now, planetary retrogrades.

Memorable Quote:

“People thought the world was gonna end because the computer had to put three zeros in a row… I bought into it is what I’m trying to say.” – Whitney (03:54)

2. Stand-Up Touring & Coping with Anxiety (06:16–10:34)

• Whitney reflects on finding her “people” through touring, especially during times of crisis.
  • Stresses using humor to cope with existential dread: “When, you know, the bombs started flying, we started yucking.”
  • Observes that real threats often get overshadowed by manageable, irrational worries.
• Her fascination with prepping (solar generators, TikTok exercise gadgets) as both parody and low-stakes survivalism.

3. Pratfalls — Candles, Crowd-Surfing, and Existential Comedy (12:12–31:00)

• Celebrity Eccentricities:
  • Whitney’s fixation on DJ Khaled buying out luxury Diptyque candles — “I bet he just gets them so other people can’t have them.” (13:06)
  • Suggestion that we should not overlook the odd details of celebrity lives.
• The death of crowd-surfing due to smartphones:
  • DJ Khaled’s failed crowd-surf (everyone holds phones, drops him) as a metaphor for today’s narcissism and group disengagement.
  • “We want a photo of ourselves with the famous person… [but] we drop them on the floor.” – Whitney (19:22)
• Pratfalls as “Darwinism” and catharsis:
  • Analyze pratfalls from Castro to Kelsey Grammer, finding relief and humor in seeing powerful people as vulnerable, fallible mortals.
  • “If you can’t laugh at [a pratfall], you’re just… not using comedy to cope, and that’s okay. But the people that do, and the people that don’t, shouldn’t—frankly—be separated at all times.” – Whitney (29:01)

4. Why Carolyn Bessette-Kennedy? The Allure of the Untouchable (37:01–50:10)

• Whitney unpacks why Carolyn Bessette-Kennedy is having a viral moment:
  • “We never heard her speak… there’s nothing we can twist, nothing we can be annoyed at.”
  • Projects about Carolyn echo obsessions with other iconic women (Princess Diana, Meghan Markle): “How did she get him?”
  • Dissects the “blonde privilege/trauma” dichotomy — living as a brunette vs. a blonde, especially in a high-status family like the Kennedys.
  • “They don’t want to see brown hair in a shower drain.” – Whitney (40:36)
  • Carolyn was a bottle blonde, not a natural one, and Whitney nerds out on the cultural/visual code of hair color and 90s beauty trends.
  • Riffs on the fantasy that one could “become” a Carolyn (“It was like a casting thing… Those people cast someone… it’s so beyond any choice you make.”)
• Digs into Carolyn’s wedding, lateness as “feminine power play,” and the burdens of minimalist fashion (“You’re not better than me because you’re simple.”)

Memorable Quote:

“The more you look like a golden child, the better your chances, and the more you pass as a child but are actually an adult—jackpot.” – Whitney (43:23)

5. The Kennedy Family’s Morbid Burial Rituals & Intuitive Red Flags (50:10–56:34)

• Whitney details the bizarre history of JFK’s original coffin being sunk in the Atlantic and RFK Jr. moving his wife’s body, drawing attention to this overlooked weirdness.
  • “What is this Jenga game of caskets? What is this Tetris of bodies under the ocean and under the ground?” – Whitney (52:14)
• Uses these tales as an example of the strange details often dismissed in celebrity/family lore, advocating for not letting these “odd details” slide.
• Encourages listeners to remain curious and trust their gut: “I just think we shouldn’t let things slide, even if you don’t know what it means yet.”

6. Instinct, Civilization, and Distracted Society (56:35–57:23)

• Ends with a riff about the incomplete LA subway, intuition vs. data, and how powerful people subtly steer narratives.
• “News really is just a get you going a different direction, isn’t it?” – Whitney (57:10)

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Notable Quotes & Moments with Timestamps

• Y2K & Generational Fears:

  “I’m coming out as a Y2K right now.” (03:54) – Whitney

• On DJ Khaled & Candles:

  “He just gets them so other people can’t have them… That is a power move.” (13:06) – Whitney

• On Pratfalls:

  “If you can’t laugh at it, you’re just… not using comedy to cope, and that’s okay.” (29:01) – Whitney

• Carolyn Bessette-Kennedy’s Mystery:

  “We never heard her speak, so we can’t hate her. There’s nothing we can twist.” (37:05) – Whitney
  “You can’t do Carolyn, because JFK Jr. saw her, and—it was like a casting thing. … It’s beyond any choice you make.” (48:00) – Whitney

• On Burial Oddities:

  “JFK’s original coffin was dropped into the Atlantic Ocean. Who was in this casket?” (51:20) – Whitney

• On Letting Weird Details Linger:

  “Just add it as a post it note to the wall. Might matter, might not.” (54:00) – Whitney

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Important Segment Timestamps

• 01:23–06:15 — Y2K, AI, and generational cycles of panic
• 07:00–10:34 — Touring, using humor to cope, prepping as psychological security
• 12:09–22:43 — DJ Khaled's candle hoarding, crowd-surfing, and fallen idols
• 24:04–31:00 — Why pratfalls are comic relief; the humbling of the powerful
• 37:01–50:10 — Carolyn Bessette-Kennedy, the ideal of the silent, beautiful icon
• 50:10–56:34 — Kennedy family’s burial weirdness, intuition, and stories that don’t add up
• 56:35–57:23 — Intuition, incomplete suburbs, narrative steering
• 57:23–End — Outro gag on “Don’t ride elephants”

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Episode Themes in Whitney’s Tone

• Frenetic, hyper-verbal, self-deprecating humor
• Cultural and psychological analysis laced with wild analogies
• Meta-commentary on society’s obsession with myth, beauty, and control
• Celebration of comedy as survival—and the need to investigate details that don’t fit
• Ultimately: An invitation to laugh, question, and admit when the world simply doesn’t make sense.

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This summary provides both a breakdown of the episode’s major topics and the underlying social commentary Whitney offers, reflecting the episode’s sharp, playful, and neurotic tone.

Transcript

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[Whitney Cummings]

I'm here on the job site with Dale, who's a framing contractor.

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[Co-host or Guest]

It's all right.

[Whitney Cummings]

We're so far up here.

Look at me. Take a deep breath.

I'm good. So good.

[Sponsor Announcer 2]

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[Whitney Cummings]

and see how much you could save. It feels good to Geico. All right, guys, we're gonna open the podcast with you know who I miss but never really knew about but I met. There's people that existed or were famous before I was old enough to understand their impact on society or what they did. And I'm really annoyed that I. I feel like I should have been like in my teens in the 70s and in my 20s, in the 80s and then just 90s, but then on out because that's where I can't. It's. That's where it all fell apart. 2000 y2k. Which by the way, the fact that everyone's freaking out about AI. I'm like, you don't. You weren't around when people thought the world was gonna end because the computer had to put three zeros in a row was the fear why? I mean, people were like jumping off cliffs holding hands. Yeah, people are like, it's over. The computer's not gonna be able to deal with three zeros in a row. No, mom, that's you and your checkbook. Do you remember that?

[Co-host or Guest]

Yeah. Well, because the people who wrote the original computer programs, it was in the 60s, the 50s and 60s, that they were writing the foundational stuff for computer science. And they couldn't imagine that the year 2000 would ever even come.

[Whitney Cummings]

Was that what it was?

[Co-host or Guest]

So the, the things that kept track of dates and times on all of the computers and all the software that had ever been made, none of them. We had the foundational coding. They were like, understand.

[Whitney Cummings]

Gonna be used to traffic kids. We'll be in jail by that year.

[Co-host or Guest]

The year 2000.

[Whitney Cummings]

We're not gonna make it.

[Co-host or Guest]

Never gonna happen.

[Whitney Cummings]

Yeah, we're gonna live on an island. Okay, so it's like some dude we

[Co-host or Guest]

just met, they thought banking software was gonna crash. And all of your records and accounts and all the digital transactions and money, we're going to not be findable anymore.

[Whitney Cummings]

But now that you're in it, adults are. What's the equivalent? Like, you know, is it the equivalent of, like, every couple of years a bunch of dorks on Reddit freak out about the Mayan calendar and real adults are like, it's fine. When we were freaking about Y2K, we're real adults. Like, guys, we know this is fun. You know what I'm saying? Were we the idiots? I was like, buying toilet paper, like, as if that was what I needed in the apocalypse.

[Co-host or Guest]

Yeah, it was a doomsday cult sort of thing. You know, people were buying into it.

[Whitney Cummings]

I bought into it is what I'm trying to say. I'm coming out as a Y2K right now.

[Co-host or Guest]

There's a reason to put a bunker in your backyard every couple of years.

[Whitney Cummings]

Well, I think it's important to that we talk about why this is not my plan today. Here we are that we talk about Y2K, because for those of you that don't remember, it was going from 1999 to 2000. Everyone I knew was like, the world's going to end because the computers are going to explode. They're not going to know what to do with that zero on the end. During that time when was I correct or was I the dumbest person on Earth?

[Co-host or Guest]

I think it was a real problem for very small scenarios, and they were able to fix it.

[Whitney Cummings]

Was it a fake fear that was made up to get us to everything

[Co-host or Guest]

in the late 90s was. Was branded with the millennium Right theme?

[Whitney Cummings]

Right?

[Co-host or Guest]

The. The. The turn of the millennium was in pop music and movies.

[Whitney Cummings]

Is AI the equivalent to Y2K AI on the horizon?

[Co-host or Guest]

Yeah. Just not such a fixed calendar date. They're not saying, like, here's the date. It's all gonna go nuts.

[Whitney Cummings]

You know me. I can't allow any. It's just young DRO said it. Everything y' all did has been done. And once you hear a rapper say that, you can never feel confident. You've are original rappers just like, ah, crush all hope that anyone has that they're special. Everything y' all did has been done. So whenever there's some big fear about something, I'm like, this is. What was the version in the 70s? What was the version of the 60s? Like in the. When were elevators invented? Because I guess everyone was paranoid that it was going to make pregnant women explode. People were legitimately scared of that, which is part of the reason so many pregnant women.

[Co-host or Guest]

It took the elevator to form that opinion.

[Whitney Cummings]

We're sprinting to the elevators and mass and, like, so disappointed. But I am just obsessed right now with irrational fears because I feel like there's so many real things to be scared of, but we're picking the more irrational ones just because it's, like, less real or. You know what I mean?

[Co-host or Guest]

Yeah.

[Whitney Cummings]

Everyone's like, mercury's in retrograde. I'm like, honey, baby, we're at war. I just got a solar generator.

[Co-host or Guest]

You just want to worry about something that has a chance of not being true.

[Whitney Cummings]

Yes, that's it. It's like the way that I've always dated. I would only date people that I knew. Nothing would ever come of it. Okay. I dated two French magicians in a row. That's not someone looking for love.

[Co-host or Guest]

And neither of them tried to make you their lovely assistant.

[Whitney Cummings]

Not one time. You can't cut me in half. I'm already bipolar.

[Co-host or Guest]

Yeah. Who are they cheating on you with? Obviously the girl in the box.

[Whitney Cummings]

I'm actually not bipolar. Isn't that weird?

[Co-host or Guest]

I don't believe you.

[Whitney Cummings]

Okay, so we're all giggles today. We're gigs. We're giggles. We're, you know, touring. I love touring so much because I was just in Sacramento and Santa Rosa. Thank you guys for reinjecting me with hope that there's ways to get through this life without absorbing reality. It. I've never done stand up during a war, I don't think. At least not like a combat war. Invisible warfare. Internet bot warfare. 5.

[Co-host or Guest]

Ren Fair.

[Whitney Cummings]

Ren Fair. And I mean, y' all are coming out in droves. No one's at home prepping. No one's panicked about congregating or they're done prepping, where they're done prepping. I mean, we were, I mean, it was a hoedown. We had so much fun. And I was like, because doing stand up, you find your people. Not online when you post, you, you know, but haters find each other. So when people are negative in the comments and stuff, I'm always like, look at these. They're fault finding friends. This is so great. All the people that hate, you know, mouthy, opinionated, you know, brunettes with crooked nostrils, they're gonna find each other and they get great. I think that's, that's. I'm glad I. And going to the shows this weekend, I was like, you're my people. You're the people. When, you know, the bombs started flying, we started yucking. You're all the people that cope with humor. And I, I, this is my, these are my people. We had such a good time. We were being such goofballs. And there's a hopefulness to it. There was a hopefulness and I even started buying things. This is just here because Chris left it. But I'm like, I'm. Now I'm into the life extension thing, remember? I was like, why do you guys want to live so long? What are we doing with all this stuff? Why are we ice bathing? Why are we sauna ing? What are we doing? Why are we eating two blueberries every 20 minutes? Like, what is all this? How long do you guys want to live? Right now? I'm, for some, I am invigorated. I've been buying items off Tik Tok shop that are exercise items. Look at this thing.

[Co-host or Guest]

You just added 45 minutes to your life.

[Whitney Cummings]

Oh, don't worry. I'll. I'll remove it shortly when I dye my roots. But I'm ready to fight zombies. I'm fully ready for them. I'm confident that if the government can keep whatever iteration of aliens they are secret, that they're not that scary. If our government can manage to keep the whatever. Uae, what is it? Ufo.

[Co-host or Guest]

They're contained.

[Whitney Cummings]

Whatever it is unhoused.

[Co-host or Guest]

It's contained, whatever.

[Whitney Cummings]

If our government can keep it private, I'm not too worried. But zombies, I'm prepping for. I got some battle rope things that are just like, I'm excited about the future. You know this. It's when you grew up in chaos, you feel calm. In crisis, you. Because the shoe dropped. When the shoe drops, it's, it's now I get to.

[Co-host or Guest]

Now I have the advantage.

[Whitney Cummings]

See, that's it. Because here's the thing. I was. I was in a paralysis earlier because I was waiting for the shoe to drop.

[Co-host or Guest]

Yeah.

[Whitney Cummings]

You guys didn't even know there was a shoe. You guys are. And then now you guys are all freaked out. I'm like, oh, my God, finally. We just went to war. Now I don't have to tell everyone we're about to go to war, and they think I'm crazy. And it's also, I guess, for people that. Not conspiracy theory people, but for people that are just like, I see what's coming. We're like, told you.

[Co-host or Guest]

Who's crazy now?

[Whitney Cummings]

The joy that comes when something horrific is actually acknowledged is kind of dark because you're just like, see, we can't change the fact that it's happening. We might as well have rejoice a tiny bit that we were finally right. Not. All right, just correct. So I'm. You know what? I'm. We're. We're not. We're not going to be a downer anymore. We are. I. I just think that this week on the podcast, the most important thing we can do is honestly, I want to be responsible with my platform. I do. I'm being. I'm. The LOL's all over the place. Okay. He. He's hahas. But I do want to use my platform responsibly. So let's just say this quickly. Just make sure America's educated. There's a couple prat falls that I believe need to be at the top of your list of importance now, immediately. You can get to the, like, fatality numbers in the war later. I'm done with any world events, and let's get back to Pratt Falls. Yeah, Guys, is there a Bread and Circus? There is now. That's what I'm doing. Okay. Where everyone's like, the bread and circus is distracting us. I'm like, where's. Where's the circuit where. I'd love to go to these distractions everyone's talking about? Where are they? Every time I try to go to distraction, they lecture me to vote. They tell me there's chemicals in my favorite food that I can't drink. There's no water. There's no water. Even if there's water. Something came up on my feed the other day that said glass water bottles have more microplastics than plastic ones. I was like, you know what? Great news. I'm done. I'm done.

[Co-host or Guest]

Eggs are good. Eggs are bad, you guys.

[Whitney Cummings]

When you all make up your minds. I'll be back. You need more time. I'm not doing your slot machine. I am going back to science I can trust and believe in. Overconfidence plus gravity equals pratfall. Let's go. Let's cover some prat falls. Some that you may not know about. Some that you may know about. But we got to dig into it more. DJ college. So explain to me how the man who hoards my favorite Diptyque candle, the base candle, whenever it's out, is because DJ Khaled hoards the base candle by Diptyque. And you know what? I bet he doesn't even use them. I bet he just gets them so other people can't have them. And there's. If you're him, you have to have that mentality. That is a power move that is truly inconceivable. He's just like, you guys are attacking white women and criticizing them. I'm taking their favorite candle.

I love candles, but this is my favorite candle. It's the bay dip. I want to say it right. Is it dipty? Diptyque. The bay flavor is my favorite candle. I get these at the Diptyque store. They love me. And then when I walk in, I want it all load up. If you follow my career, you know, I love these. And if you ever been in my house or my office, you know I love these. When I'm on tour, my dressing room be having them. It's part of my rider. It's important.

Let's take a break from my. You taking notes? You guys see these on my table all the time here in the podcast studio. You know, I'm obsessed with Olipop. I am so obsessed with these. I've been drinking way before they sponsored the show. I was obsessed with Ollipop. Maybe they, like, pity took pity on me and we're like, fine, we'll just throw her a bum. It tastes like the actual sodas you drank growing up. Ollipop is. I'm obsessed with it. Well, the orange and the grape have been my forever, forever favorites. I. It's all I drink. They do cream soda now. I'm kind of just like obsessed with. But I don't overdo that one because, like, when you. It's like, oh, my God. I'm just like, crushing it at the roller rink. What I love about Olipop is that it is reimagining soda with high fiber and low sugar. It contains a functional ingredient blend that supports digestive health. So many people are trying to be More conscious about what they're drinking without feeling deprived. They made it super easy to try. Get a free can of Hollypop. Buy two cans of Olipop in a store and they will pay you back for one. It works in any flavor, any retailer go to drinkolipop.com Whitney Ollipop is sold online. Drink olipop.com Amazon also available in the soda aisle with chilled beverages at thousands of retailers nationwide including Walmart, Target, Costco and Health. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. I am a mom of a two year and three month old kid to get food down my gullet. I mean it is truly a. Is it Whack a mole Hungry hippos. What's the thing where you just don't get to eat? Torture. What is this? The, the Geneva Accords? I, I have a piece of toast with jelly and, and peanut butter on the desk if you. It's right here. For the past since. What is it? Since 7am I've been trying to eat this. You can't get. It's not possible. It's not gonna happen. All right. Huel Black edition. This has changed my life. I'm not kidding. It is like my to I, I, I can drink something. I can look chewing. There's just no time. I mean someone calls cps. I took three bites of food today and swallowed it near my son who is currently climbing a Christmas tree that I've not taken down because there's no time. All right? So I'm obsessed. I take this with me wherever I go. I probably have a couple a day and guess what? Guess what? My guy and my baby's dad, they're obsessed with it and they have great taste in women. I just mean I have them all in my garage fridge and every time I go to get one, they're all gone. Everyone in my life is sustaining on Hu. It's a complete meal with 35 grams of protein, 27 essential vitamins, minerals, no artificial sweeteners, colors, flavors, gluten free. It's under $5 per meal. It's ridicul, ridiculously easy and it actually it I don't think about eating like it keeps you full. On days when I'm home, I just want something a little more customized. I use the Black Edition powder. You can blend it with ice. I put it in smoothies. Complete meal benefits. 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Banking services provided by Cash Apps Bank Partners Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton bank member FDIC Cash App Green overdraft coverage tomorrow. Cash App Back offers and promotions provided by Cash App, a Block Inc. Brand. Visit Cash App Slash Legal slash Podcast for full disclosures so they can't unwind. Like that's. That's activism. We're not letting these white women relax. We are taking their favorite candle.

[Co-host or Guest]

Yeah. You're not going to make them feel bad with your words. You take away their candles.

[Whitney Cummings]

Yeah. So I'm just like, how do I relax? I don't have that relaxing smell. I mean, it is. We're going to. I'm going to make their houses smell bad. So let's play this clip. Let's play it. So couple things here. I don't entirely blame DJ Khaled's body for this.

[Co-host or Guest]

Okay.

[Whitney Cummings]

Everyone is also holding their phones. So crowd surfing's done. I'm fascinated by the little things that are gone because of phones, because of tech. You guys are like, oh, we're replacing humans. I'm like, okay, good. We're replacing. Crowd surfing is gone. Everyone in that video is holding a cell phone, half holding him, trying to get themselves holding him, and he falls. This is the kind of Darwinism I, you know, this is my kink. We're in. Or we want a photo of ourselves with the famous person because we love them so much that when we're actually holding them in the palm of our hands, we drop them on the floor.

[Co-host or Guest]

I think they needed a little more prep time, by the way.

[Whitney Cummings]

The velocity was wild. He also ran this dude. Like, this is part of why he's such a he. He's. He's never watched like ground surfing video.

[Co-host or Guest]

He's serving the moment. He's. He didn't overthink it.

[Whitney Cummings]

He did attack them. He did. He. He did attack them. He went full America here. I mean, I think crowd serving, you're supposed to like gently kind of fall back. He like ran and dove or get

[Co-host or Guest]

them all together and put your phone down.

[Whitney Cummings]

Everyone's holding their phones and they drop this man. They could have held him up. I feel like the type of people that go see DJ Khaled in person could like, they're, they're Deep throat and protein powder pretty regularly.

[Co-host or Guest]

If all of those people could be regrouped and they were given a second shot without holding their cell phones, I don't know that the result would be any different.

[Whitney Cummings]

If you want to make the argument the DJ college fans do not have the pull up bar in their bathroom door. It's over, Pat. It's over. If you don't think that's the demo that buys the five hour energy drink from 7 11. You have blind spots and you are. When did Pat become the least relatable person on this podcast? So we're dropping our heroes.

[Co-host or Guest]

So the candles are all out of stock and that's why the energy drinks are gone.

[Whitney Cummings]

In his will, where do the candles go? That's all I want to know. I just. There's certain things we have to know about celebrities you can't buy. You know when you try to go buy tickets to like a concert and they're like, you can only buy four or like, there's certain things that's like limits of randomly, like Taylor Swift's merch. You can only buy like 2 of the thing or something. Why does DJ Khaled get to buy all the candles? The dipty candles? I bet he has different people buy them in. Like, this is important. This is a pathology that, you know, that I'm obsessed with. After someone commits a crime, what their neighbors say, Such a nice guy. Yeah. He was behaving in a way so that.

[Co-host or Guest]

Until they found all the candles.

[Whitney Cummings]

Why is this guy. What's going on?

[Co-host or Guest]

They have to go to a warehouse.

[Whitney Cummings]

You know, something's going to hit weird, and I'm going to go, no, remember the candles. Like, include the candlestick. There's something going on. I don't know what it is. It's someone else's job. Because my adds now needs to get to something else. But I'm on to something.

[Co-host or Guest]

I think you. You should befriend him and ask him during a private moment.

[Whitney Cummings]

All I'm asking is that everybody not rush past weird things that celebrities do just because they're celebrities. Remember when Diddy was changing his name every couple months? There's things where. Remember when Epstein was dating a woman that looked like Janet from Three's company and nobody thought it was weird? Like, look at the thing no one's looking at. Closet full of candles. That's as far as I'm gonna go. Is there another pratfall that we can look at? If you want to talk about international politics, on through the lens of pratfalls. Cuba. Lots going on in Cuba right now. Not my problem. Do you remember when Fidel Castro fell down a flight of stairs? The Cuban leader was walking off the stage after delivering a graduation speech when he missed a step and face planted into the ground. Hey, can you play it again? Hold on. I'm. I'm laughing so hard that, like, snots coming out of my nose. A Cuban leader was walking off the stage after delivering a graduation speech when he missed a single step and face planted into the ground. So this is important. Even as he's falling, he's like, this wouldn't happen to me. Like, he's not catching him. He's not even going to catch himself. He's like, this is someone else's problem. Someone's going to get me. And then he falls on his face.

[Co-host or Guest]

He didn't defensively protect his face because he was sure this wasn't actually happening to him.

[Whitney Cummings]

Like, this is a man who's like this. I'm not falling. I'm not falling. This isn't happening.

[Co-host or Guest]

I won't allow the floor to hit my face.

[Whitney Cummings]

I went paddle boarding Once. The first and last time I went, no, I actually liked it. It was in a lake in Lake Arrowhead, and I went with a friend of mine, and we're paddle boarding, and we both fell separate times, and we both fell completely different ways. He fell. As soon as he fell, he just surrender. Surrendered. I was like, you just gave up? I was like, that was crazy. He was just, like, up and just went. I thought tooth and nail was, this is not. No. Like, he's like, the way you fell was like the roadrunner trying to, like, get off the ground in the desert. Like, I was just like, no, no, no. Like, I was. I. I turned fully around. By the time I hit the water, I was already like, I'm not. I'm up. There's no. We're not doing this on. Absolutely no one in this lake is going to watch me struggle to get back on a paddle board. Okay. In a Target bathing suit that I think. I think belonged in the children's section. This is important because, Whitney, why are we watching Pratt Falls during a work. These are just human beings. When you see the leader of a country trip and fall down a flight of stairs, you're like, that's just a guy. That's just a guy with an inner ear thing. Like, he might just have a cold that day. That's just a guy who has gotten so accustomed to being catered to, told. Yes. That, like, he's just like, I don't. Stairs don't apply to me. When do you, as the leader of a country, stop looking where you're going? This is what I'm worried. Just these. Remember the show Succession did this amazing job of. There was an episode where everyone was, like, sick. All these billionaires were, like, sick. And just as, you know, a way to show, like, these people are just bags of blood like the rest of us. Like, they get sick. They get, like, bacteria. They're, like, feeble and fragile. Like, it's just such a weird thing to see this, like, titan of a man that everyone respects. Just like, there's truly empires that could topple if the man leading it walked through a spider web. Imagine Vladimir Putin. You know, there's, like, nine spiderweb guys that are just, like, ahead of him. Just like. Because if he goes on camera, like, the whole, it's Russia's over.

[Co-host or Guest]

I would imagine in a place like Russia, when that footage does happen, everybody there disappears.

[Whitney Cummings]

I don't. It's such a weird thing. Like, these men that are all just at war with each other in this world. I'M like, don't you ever get lonely? Doesn't ever get sad poisoning your friends? You know? Like, doesn't it get. Don't. Is there ever. I'm just curious. Do these. That men ever just go like, God, I miss Oleg. Mistake. No. Right. They're just psychopaths. No. People are just like, it's chess. Everyone's a chess piece.

[Co-host or Guest]

Yeah. And they're. They're able to ignore the fact that, like, they're probably gonna be gone themselves.

[Whitney Cummings]

Yeah.

[Co-host or Guest]

In 10 years.

[Whitney Cummings]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's for the good of the nation, all of these poor people that I refuse to give health care. They're better off if I kill you. You know that I'm a doctor and I'm dispensing emotional medicine. Okay? Laughter is the best medicine, and I'm giving it to you right now. Kelsey Grammer did fall off a stage, I don't know, maybe 10 years ago.

[Co-host or Guest]

Longer than that.

[Whitney Cummings]

It's so embedded in my psyche. It. Yeah, it was probably like 15. Yeah, it was probably. It happened yesterday because I watched it four times yesterday and he was giving a speech. And I think I'm also obsessed with Pratt Falls because when I am on stage, like, that would be the worst thing that could happen to Is, like, we're obsessed with stuff. Studying the thing that's the scariest to us. Whereas I think most women watch murder documentaries and stuff. I watch people falling off stages because that would be it. That'd be the end. The end. And Kelsey Gr Was giving a speech, and he falls into, like, a pit. Like the orchestra pit or something.

[Co-host or Guest]

Pretending I was a UN interpreter.

[Whitney Cummings]

Good lord.

Oh, I actually feel so bad. The fact that I'm laugh, it's taught me so much about why I'm laughing. And for all of you dorks that are mad at jokes, study your reaction to a pratfall. If you can't laugh at it, you're the type of person that is just not. You don't use comedy to cope, and that's okay. But the people that do and the people that don't, shouldn't. We should, I mean, frankly, be separated at all times. We should be broken into. Instead of north and south, we should break up this country into people who laugh at. Sorry. People falling and people don't. You know what? There is a very deep existential probably entwined with the terror management theory that when someone falls, it's like we could all die at any moment. Like, it's a bigger picture. We are so at the edge of death at all times. There's people who like, can't get stung by a bee. It's over. Like the, like a little. The stingers are. I mean, tiny can take out an adult man if a bee can take out an adult man. Like, we're all just like. There's a horror that you can only laugh at. I almost just saw my friend die. Like he tripped, but like he made it somehow between the concrete. If you hadn't just sprained your wrist, you'd be dead. Like that concrete between you and the concrete. I got my money on the concrete instead of your Easter egg head, your Cadbury cream egg of a head. It's laughing is a relief is what I'm saying. You're not going like, haha, they're hurt. You're going, oh my God. Like, we're all been.

[Co-host or Guest]

Any one of us.

[Whitney Cummings]

We're running out of time. So anyway, I just thought we should have some giggle. Giggle Hahas. Last week we talked about Jim Carrey. Pat was right again. I was hoodwinked. He was using the French artist. What's his name? I can't remember his name. To. Do you think that he was trying to basically go, this is how good the masks have gotten. So question everything you see.

[Co-host or Guest]

So much conspiracy theory and conjecture and all this stuff has been thrown into the global discussion about powerful people that it's like questioning, is this possible? Can this happen? Is this possible? Can this happen? And for someone to lay it out with, like, it's almost like a demonstration.

[Whitney Cummings]

All right, so let's talk. Let's talk about it. Let's talk about the old fat Shay here, right? Makeup is a problem. The point of makeup, I think everyone's forgetting because there's tutorials now everyone can go watch. Like, you know, people put on makeup and it. It's started making people be makeupy. I'm just trying to look healthy. Fresh. Is that so much to ask? To look like I was just born? Is it so much to ask for these makeup companies to just make me look like a fairy nymph in the woods with a dew drop on my nose? Is it so hard to make me look like I am inside of a hibiscus when it is raining in Hawaii? What's the problem? Is there a radiance issue? Did we cancel Luminosity? This is why I love Jones Road Beauty. Okay? The miracle bomb is my is has usurped my entire head. It gives you this just. It just looks like your skin. Okay? You don't look like marzipan. You don't look like a mochi. Love those things. Don't want to look like them. You're not brushes also. Brushes are. I'm not even a germ weirdo, but brushes are. I mean, we have bugs in our eyebrows and eyelashes. You guys imagine what is in those brushes. Okay? So just saying. I love that you just put it on. You're not. You don't need to, like, you know, airbrush your whole head. Okay. You use it. It's like a bronzer. It's a blush, It's a highlighter. I even use it on my lips. It is a game changer. All of Jones Road. Sorry. Game changer. And all of Jones Roads formulas are clean, high performing. So they look good, they feel good on your skin. We know this. I'm also into their Just enough. Okay. They have a tinted moisturizer. Was like lightweight, natural. I have a little on right now. You don't have to do a lot. Okay. I do this palette as well. It's like three colors. One is like a. One is like a. Like a cheek stain. Okay. And I'm doing this. I don't have to do it like that. I feel like I'm like playing it up for you guys to try to look cute. I actually, like, just do like that. I'm not like super cute about it. Look at it. Look at that. Look, look. Doesn't it look like I had a good childhood? What? And then this is a highlighter, which I do under my eyebrows. Okay. I'm not really looking in the mirror, so this might look crazy. I do it right. Boom. At the crease of both my eyes. Boom.

[Co-host or Guest]

Boom.

[Whitney Cummings]

Mentally healthy. A little bit under this waterline. And then I got right there, the top of your lip. Right there. Now what Reddit. Now what Reddit. Oh, you're in love with me. Okay. Jones Road is my favorite also. You can just like throw this in your back pockets. Like, no problem. So for a limited time, our listeners are going to get a free shimmer face oil on their first purchase when they use Code Whitney at checkout. Head to Jones road beauty dot com. Use code Whitney@ checkout. After you purchase, they will ask you where you heard from them. Please support our show and tell them our show sent you. Get cozy. DraftKings Casino is turning up the heat this winter. They've got more than 1,000 slots. So whether you like the classic style games or you want something that feels a little more intense, a little newer, they have a ton to play. It's one of those things where you open an app. Suddenly you've got way more options than you expected and it actually feels like fun right away. If you're add like me, it's the fun's gotta come now. If you're into casino games and you want something easy to jump into, it is a great time to check it out. There are a ton of slot options, the app is easy to use, and the offer for new is actually huge. So if you've been curious, now is the time. New players can wager $5 and get 500 spins over 10 days on your choice of cash eruption slots. Download the DraftKings Casino app, sign up with Code Whitney and start spinning. The crown is yours. In partnership with DraftKings Casino Gambling Problem. Call 1-800-GAMBLER in Connecticut. Help is available for problem gambling. Call 888-789-7777 or visit c cpg.org Please play responsibly. 21/Pically present in Connecticut, Michigan, New Jersey, Pennsylvania, West Virginia only void in Ontario eligibility restrictions apply. Non withdrawable spins issued as 50 spins per day for 10 days. Valid for select games only after 24 hours. See [e-mail] Promos ends May 3 at 11:59pm Eastern Time.

[Co-host or Guest]

Acknowledging what could be possible, I think.

[Whitney Cummings]

And the guy's named Alex Stone. So the guy, Alex Stone, he's done Madonna and Jack Nicholson and he like goes around in masks like all the time that it's kind of thing where

[Co-host or Guest]

it's like yes, like Scooby Doo, Mission Impossible. They've been doing the Y. The. The who who done it mask reveal for 100 years.

[Whitney Cummings]

He did the movie the Mask too, which is interesting.

[Co-host or Guest]

Yeah.

[Whitney Cummings]

So it's just going, hey, the master D for a photo that's far away from someone in a prison yard that's just walking around. Here's a photo of him in prison. Here's a. You know it. It's possible. It's passable.

[Co-host or Guest]

Yeah.

[Whitney Cummings]

That's a very cool thing to do. I don't usually think stuff like that hits, but like that hits.

[Co-host or Guest]

Yeah. It was like a. Like a case study example.

[Whitney Cummings]

Because if he said it like you guys are listening to me say this now and you're going, she's nuts. But just showing it is so sick.

[Co-host or Guest]

Controlling it.

[Whitney Cummings]

No one can refute. No one can refute it.

[Co-host or Guest]

Yeah.

[Whitney Cummings]

And it's also, if you get it, you get it. And if you don't, you don't.

[Co-host or Guest]

Yeah. But it's now. Now it's citable. You can reference that when talking about another Thing that could be.

[Whitney Cummings]

Yes. Well, do. That guy showed up in the Jim Carrey mask, and people just thought he had gotten a nose job.

[Co-host or Guest]

Yeah.

[Whitney Cummings]

Okay, let's get to stuff that's actually relevant. And in the Zeitgeist, people are obsessed with Carolyn Bassette Kennedy. Right now, my entire feed is Carolyn Bessette Kennedy. Everyone's. Everyone's. My friends are trying to dress like Carolyn Bassette Kennedy. I'm like, honey, it's over. It's over. Your baby, baby. What are we doing? We're not. No. We're not doing a boat neck top. All of us. A really kitten heel. We're not. Let's get the Crocs back on and be adults about this. All right. People are obsessed with her. And I'm just gonna say it. I believe. Yes, she's gorgeous. Yes, we want to know how she did it. Fine, get to that. But I think the reason people are obsessed with Carolyn beside Kennedy is because we never heard her speak. So we can't hate her. There's nothing we can twist. There's nothing we can be annoyed at. There's not like she lets us project on her. Smart. Also, we're obsessed with her because we want to know, how'd she do it? How'd she get him? What was it? Tell us. Compliments. You laughed at his jokes. Kegels. What was it? Same reason we're obsessed with Meghan Markle, Princess Diana. You know what? Megan knows what she's doing. She pretends not to talk, which passes for men. Like, she's like, I didn't. You know those girls that are like, I didn't say anything. I didn't say anything. Like, I'll talk a lot and be like, yeah, but I didn't say this thing. I'm like, quiet as a mouse. She'll advertise how little she talks, but all she's doing is actually talking. She's the person who wants a trophy when she doesn't send her food back at a restaurant. It's like, that person. It's like, I didn't send it back. I just sat here and ate it. They don't interrupt a conversation. And they're like, yeah, I just sat there and let them talk. You're like that. That's what a conversation is. That's how it works. I mean, I don't do that. But you're. You can't. If you want to be a princess. You. You. The basic thing is you have to let. You have to wait your turn. When the person with the diamonds on their head is talking. If you want to live in the castle. It's like. I didn't say. I just. I was like, silenced. Yeah. You didn't have enough diamonds on your head. Do you not. Do you not remember how imaginary tea parties work? It's very simple stuff here. But Meghan Markle, Kate Middleton, Princess Diana, it's always like, how did she get the prince? Like, how did she get the guy? That's it with Carolyn. Women are studying him. How did she get him? How did she get JFK Jr. I have a theory about these rich men. They don't. They don't want to see brown hair in a shower drain. I said it whenever I have dated a guy who had money growing up, somehow every time I take a shower, I'm cleaning the drain, popping off a couple Lee Press on nails, getting it out, and then I got to put it in the toilet. They don't know what to do with hair that isn't blonde. They had cleaning ladies. They haven't seen a natural living human shedding and molting. Also, the stress of being with someone like that makes you start going bald. So. But they don't. They never had to see it. The Kennedy family in particular. Blondes only. This is the family who couldn't just leave Marilyn Monroe out of it. They couldn't do it. And Marilyn Monroe was a bottle blonde, which is trouble. Stay with me. When you have a blonde woman with the brunette personality, you're not prepared. If you grew up brunette and then you go to blonde. No one is ready. No one is ready because. Because they carry the grit of always having coming in second. But now they have the power of easily coming in first. But the resentment that now they are getting preferential treatment they don't deserve. They're like, wait, I went all that time being brunette for no reason. I did more damage the year that I was blonde than any year of my life. I was like, what? This is pot? This is a. I didn't know about this level. I didn't even know this was an option. When you've been brunette your whole life and then you're blonde and you, like, go to Starbucks, you're like, why did you draw a heart on my cup? You got my name right. Like, I didn't even know this was an option. You go on a plane and the pilot, like, invites you to see the cockpit. You're like, huh? What? I fly seven times a week. I've never seen the cockpit. I get to press some buttons. Why? What? It's so Weird. It is so weird when you start getting that preferential treatment like when you're a kid. See, I have. I have blondes in my family and brunettes. And when you go to the pool, it's two different things. The blondes are just getting sunscreen put on them and we're just like in the deep end. Just like with a kickboard. They're like, put the kickboard over your face. It's not so it's different. Carolyn was not a natural blonde. Stay with me. Carolyn Bessette Kennedy was a bottle blonde. She was a natural light to medium brunette. Stay with me. Her iconic 90s butter blonde quote, this is I pulled from Claude or somewhere, was created by colors. Brad Johns. I know this sounds boring. Stay with me. She did something called a chunking technique, starting with a toffee base, adding golden highlights to mimic. To mimic what, Pat croissants. A child's natural summer beach hair. I said, I wouldn't do this today. Ah, she did it. She's like, you want the copper tone, girl? Here I am. Probably didn't have pubes either. I'm just saying, the more you look like a golden child, the better your chances and the more you pass as a child but are actually an adult. Jackpot. So look, I just also, Chris Rock said something so funny when the Tiger woods thing was happening, you know, because the whole thing was like, Tiger woods has 18 girlfriends. And women were all like. She was a bottle. They were all bottle service girls. And Chris Rock just went, we don't care what you do. Which, like, I've spent my whole life being like, you have to be like self sufficient. It's just so that a good guy wants a date. They. It's. Yeah. So she also was the dream girl with her job. She was a sales girl. She started as a sales girl. She was working at Ralph Lauren selling clothes. Right. They loved her style. And then she started being like the VIP salesperson to celebrities. That was like her whole thing. So she had a job, but it was service based. She knew how to, like, tie a tie for a man. She knew how to, like, know your size. She knew how, you know, she was service based. And it was a job that kind of didn't really matter. Like, I could take you out of it whenever you want. But she's not like, she's not a gold digger. She's making $4 an hour. You know, it's not a job where you're gonna have any control of your life. And I. You still have to defer to Me, right? And you know how to tie time. And I'm Kennedy, so I'm like, I'm really trying, you guys. I like her, and I'm sorry about everything that happened to her. But you know what my biggest pet peeve is in humans. And you know why it's my biggest pet peeve? Because sometimes I do it, and I hate that I. That I do it. So my thing with Marilyn Monroe, this thing where blondes can just show up whenever they want because they're like. But I am, like, just. I just. You know how we are. Like, you didn't have to brush your hair as blonde. You didn't have to curl it. You know, I gotta do. I gotta put 19. You know, the thing that in no country for Old Men that he used. So I have to put that. I have to use that on my own head for, like, 20 minutes just to look like, you know, Johnny Depp and From Dust till Dawn. Okay, was he in that?

[Co-host or Guest]

He was in that.

[Whitney Cummings]

Who was it?

[Co-host or Guest]

But if he was.

[Whitney Cummings]

But if he was, who was it? It was Woody Harrelson.

[Co-host or Guest]

Oh, Banderas.

[Whitney Cummings]

That's right. Antonio Banderas. Whatever. You look in the comments to see what I'm dressed like today and what I look like. Her wedding in 1996. I was like, I like her. I like her. I like her. She seems cool. She seems cool. Married the wrong guy, whatever. Dazzled. She got swept up. Why did she have to be two hours late to her own wedding? I don't like it. I'm obsessed with Marilyn Monroe. But then someone shows me a quote where she's like, always be at least four hours late. Keeps them waiting. I'm like, huh? Some people have to get to their other job. Marilyn, sweetheart, some people have been there since 4am Some people have. This is why no women can work in Hollywood. Because the couple famous ones show that don't have kids show up late. And then the ones with kids like, well, I have to go. I don't. We don't have formula yet.

[Co-host or Guest]

We'll find another one.

[Whitney Cummings]

We. I gotta get. I gotta hoof my sternum back to Santa Clarita to fight the leprosy antibodies and young Harry. So she was two hours late to her own wedding. See, this is what you know when they try to, like. Like you try to document a. A beautiful woman with, like, how nymphish she is because she's, like, always late. Like, she's just, like, late. You. You don't get to be late if you're marrying a billionaire. What's the excuse? Her bias cut silk dress was so fitted and delicate that it was difficult to get over her head and required complex last minute fittings. Why? Why? Why last minute making her late for the event? She has amazing style. She's amazing style. Fine, fine. It's not my face. This whole thing where just because it's simple, you're better than. You're not better than me because you're simple. It's like, it's like the documentary of fashion choices. Just because you watched a documentary doesn't mean you read a book and you're not smarter than me. Just because you wear really simple clothes and buy stuff on retail and buy. I buy stuff from gas stations via ebay. You're not better than me. You're just minimalist. I'm a maximalist. You're not better than me because you take no risks. Okay? Also, also the level of hungry you have to be to pull off the clothes that she wore is a stat. I'm just not willing to be that hangry. I just can't. I'd rather not be a fashion icon and also not like, snap at the people I love the most. I'm obsessed with the last minute power struggle things men and women do before they surrender. Because she quit her job for him, she's like, in the public eye, her life is, you know, and she's like, well, this is my last. Is this subconsciously her last way of showing? Like, I may be completely surrendering to the Kennedy family and I've lost my entire identity in the process and job and friends and everything. But, like, that's what I feel like. Lateness is sometimes, like when a girlfriend of mine shows up late to something, I'm like, are you feeling like I run the show in our friendship? Like, are you feeling like I'm always like, let's do this, let's do this? I'm not available on your time. I don't drive to your house enough. Like, what's going on? Like, is this like subconsciously? Probably kind of, right? So, I mean, also, I mean, the dress is beautiful. I don't. JFK Jr. Was like, we're not marrying you for your fashion. I'm marrying you because you let me cheat on you. Let's be honest, you're the prettiest girl I could find who would be fine with me cheating on you. Like, I don't care about your dress. But the family's weird. And it's just, it gets weird when we start to like, glamorize this woman who was just Pulverized by this family. Like, men like JFK Jr. Like, they. They're very strategic about who they marry. He saw her and something happened. People are like, how do I emulate? You can't. He saw her and there was some prototype in his head that is so beyond any choices that you make. He saw her and he was like, that's Eve. I'm Adam. That's Eve, that's Aphrodite. I'm Zeus. It was like a casting thing. Those people cast someone that's like. Like, that's what I saw in a. A fresco, a painting on the ceiling in an Italian castle when I was training to be Illuminati at Illuminati camp at the Vatican or whatever it was. Jfk, we're going to wrap this up. I'm just going to throw some things at you.

Do it.

Then what they will. JFK's coffin was thrown into the ocean. Did you know that?

No.

Like, I just. You guys want to talk about, like, the fashion choices of Carolyn beside Kennedy and I'm really trying. I'm really trying. But Also, why was JFK's original coffin dropped in the ocean in 1966 by the US Air Force? the request of the Kennedy family to prevent it from becoming a morbid relic or souvenir due to public fascination with the assassination. Anyone know also what he said? Robert F. Kennedy cited that his brother's wish for a burial at sea was symbolic justification of that. All right. The damaged casket was drilled, weighted with sandbag sunk in the Atlantic beyond the. Who was in this casket? Who was in this casket? Is my question. So they just dropped it in the Atlantic Ocean. So you're telling me that some dolphin got CTE because you guys needed to hide a body? Imagine being just like a. Like a sea turtle who's just like God. Like, just. What do they know where it is? Like, is this. I think we should dig it up. Speaking of. In July 2012, RFK Jr exhumed and dug up the body of his estranged wife, Mary Richardson Kennedy, about 700ft away from the plot to a new Separate plot at St. Francis Xavier Cemetery on Cape Cod. I'm just. What is this, guys? They didn't notify the siblings relocated her from a family plot on the hillside was spaced for future development. RFK Jr spokesperson stated that the original area was too crowded and the new spot was on a sunny hillside provided room for their children to be buried. Nearby was the. Are their deaths playing? What's happening? What is this? This Jenga game of Caskets. What is this Tetris of bodies were doing under the ocean and under the ground? Quote, the move was made in the middle of the night. It I thought to this. I thought we wanted sunny hillside. I thought we wanted illumination without the knowledge of her family and allegedly without legal permits.

[Co-host or Guest]

Well, yeah, it was a surprise. You're gonna ruin the surprise.

[Whitney Cummings]

I just. Look, for me, popular topics are an opportunity to unearth, dig up, exhume facts that I feel like should be in the zeitgeist. I'm not going to comment on it. I, you know, do. Do with that what you will. Speaking of wills, do I need to specify in my will to. If I'm buried, just leave me there. Like, just leave it. Like, you know, I do a post it note that says, like, keep this door closed because there's a dog inside. Do we need to post it? No, my casket that's like leave it stays here. Keep it closed and leave it.

[Co-host or Guest]

Yeah, like the Egyptian tombs, they had all like the spooky warnings on the wall, like, don't touch it, don't disturb it. Don't do it. And then they.

[Whitney Cummings]

I wasn't planning on it.

[Co-host or Guest]

And they're cursed. Then there's a curse. I mean, you could write a. You could write up a curse, but

[Whitney Cummings]

why not just let someone be cursed? Why are you stopping someone from being like, what?

[Co-host or Guest]

Like, it's like a fair warning. Like vampires, you have to invite it, but also wouldn't.

[Whitney Cummings]

Is that where you would hide a diamond? In a place where people like, don't touch?

[Co-host or Guest]

Yeah. You know, but if you want a curse to stick, you have to make sure that the person being cursed is overtly willing to be.

[Whitney Cummings]

I'd rather have a diamond and be cursed me right now.

[Co-host or Guest]

Yeah.

[Whitney Cummings]

Marriage. So that's where I am today. And I know it's a lot, but this is what's going on in my brain. And you know, if this episode does nothing but give you permission to have wild, scattered thoughts at the moment and process information at your own speed and maybe stay sn snagged on things that you want. I just think we shouldn't let things slide. Even if you don't know what it means yet. Collet and all these candles. It's. Just add it to the. Add it as a post it note to the wall. Might matter, might not.

[Co-host or Guest]

The world is moving so fast right now. It's a good time to pause and like, clean up the.

[Whitney Cummings]

Yeah. Like, thing. I just think we're all so disconnected from our gut and we're so programmed of what to think is important and what details matter and how things should be framed. And I kind of just like to go like huh, what's really weird about what's. What's my brain not dropping and why RFK digging up his ex wife in the middle of the night and moving her somewhere. It's just like it comes up a

[Co-host or Guest]

lot if you have more than one story in your life about moving a dead thing. There's a different.

[Whitney Cummings]

I didn't even bring up the bear. This isn't even including the bear. This isn't even including.

[Co-host or Guest]

You should run account. How many times has the Kennedy family generally moved a dead thing under the COVID of darkness?

[Whitney Cummings]

Wait, where did they drop the coffin? And where did the plane crash of his son? Oh God.

[Co-host or Guest]

Disinformation is the only thing available I would imagine.

[Whitney Cummings]

I know but what does your intuition do Hugh Civil is sophisticated civilizations were built on instinct and intuition alone. We've lost it. Like we can't do make the pyramids. Yeah. Because we're probably trying too hard to put them math on. Does this feel like it's going to work? I don't. It doesn't feel like it's going to work. That's what it used to be. I feel like it needs to be over more. It we. We start going but the math isn't mathing. Huh. There's a whole subway system under Los Angeles that has not been subway. Yeah. That has not been finished because the door $2 billion they put in this Spencer Pratt get googling. They realized that the math it wasn't going to hit it wasn't going to connect at like a mile away. So they just stopped it.

[Co-host or Guest]

I think the fact that that train line was going to end in Beverly Hills had a lot to do with

[Whitney Cummings]

why guys wife came in and was like I don't feel like this is going to connect. Can you just measure it again?

[Co-host or Guest]

Yeah.

[Whitney Cummings]

Feels off.

[Co-host or Guest]

Hey, let's find a mathematical reason to stop this from bringing trained people into Beverly Hills.

[Whitney Cummings]

Yeah. Oh, and they're all the billionaires. Like darn. Now we just have a tunnel. Ah, what a bummer.

[Co-host or Guest]

Yeah. Forgotten tunnel.

[Whitney Cummings]

Now we just have an awesome tunnel with no train in it that goes from LAX airport to Malibu.

[Co-host or Guest]

That's right. Yeah. And nobody from downtown can get in there.

[Whitney Cummings]

Gosh. News really is just a get you going a different direction, isn't it?

[Co-host or Guest]

Yeah. You've got your explanation now move on with your life.

[Whitney Cummings]

On that note, don't ride elephants. Love you guys. See you soon. Spring just slid into your DMs. Grab that boho.

[Sponsor Announcer]

Look for that rooftop dinner, those sandals

[Whitney Cummings]

that can keep up with you. And hang some string lights to give your patio a glow up. Spring's calling, Ross.

[Sponsor Announcer]

Work your magic.