Josh Almost DIED?!

Summary

Podcast Summary: Good Guys – "Josh Almost DIED?!"

Podcast Information:

• Title: Good Guys
• Hosts: Josh Peck and Ben Soffer
• Episode Title: Josh Almost DIED?!
• Release Date: August 11, 2025

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1. Sports Talk: Mets vs Dodgers

Timestamp: [00:40] – [03:59]

The episode kicks off with Josh and Ben diving into their shared passion for sports, particularly focusing on the New York Mets. Ben expresses his loyalty to the Mets, highlighting the team's recent performance and management decisions.

Notable Quotes:

• Ben: "I would accept the tickets, please. Dodgers send them. Because my son is a massive Dodgers fan." ([01:14])
• Josh: "The New York Mets, you know, they're playing some fantastic ball. You wear that hat with pride." ([02:01])

Josh humorously critiques the Dodgers' financial prowess, comparing it to the Yankees and emphasizing the Mets' strategic spending on promising players like Juan Soto.

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2. Dennis Rodman Episode: Ben’s Experience

Timestamp: [05:09] – [16:51]

Ben shares an intriguing behind-the-scenes story from a previous podcast episode where he interviewed basketball legend Dennis Rodman. Through a series of Instagram exchanges, Ben secured Rodman's participation, leading to a memorable and intense conversation.

Notable Quotes:

• Ben: "He could lose 30 bands at least." ([05:48])
• Josh: "Dennis Rodman, what a legend." ([08:05])

The discussion highlights Rodman’s charismatic yet controversial nature, including a segment where Rodman addressed serious topics with humor and candor. Ben reflects on the experience, noting that the episode might have been toned down due to the extreme nature of the guest’s anecdotes.

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3. Personal Health Story: Ben’s Allergic Reaction

Timestamp: [34:42] – [41:24]

Ben recounts a personal health scare involving a severe allergic reaction to an expired hand cream. He describes the sudden onset of symptoms, including an itchy rash and difficulty breathing, leading him to administer Zyrtec in a panic.

Notable Quotes:

• Ben: "I literally ended the call abruptly. I’m so sorry. I have to go." ([36:23])
• Josh: "I've never had my throat close." ([26:03])

The hosts discuss the importance of being prepared for allergic reactions, sharing tips on using pulse oximeters and understanding safe oxygen levels. Ben emphasizes the necessity of having contingency plans and reliable medical advice on hand.

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4. Listener Interaction: Kara’s Baby Registry Issue

Timestamp: [52:02] – [57:21]

A listener named Kara reaches out with a dilemma about her baby registry. As a first-time mother, she curated a registry with a range of items from $5 to $250. However, an attendee at her baby shower criticized her for not opting for hand-me-downs, causing her frustration and self-doubt.

Notable Quotes:

• Kara: "Am I nuts for thinking that's like crazy to go out of your way to ask me that?" ([52:04])
• Josh: "You're not a moron. She is... She's a moron." ([53:41])

Josh and Ben firmly support Kara, condemning the attendee's insensitive remarks. They defend the importance of personalized registries, especially for first-time parents, and advise that registries provide a convenient way for guests to contribute meaningfully.

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5. Woody and Nuts: Gripes About Pets and Weather

Timestamp: [57:40] – [61:39]

In their segment "Woody and Nuts," Josh and Ben vent about common annoyances. They express strong opinions against French Bulldogs, criticizing the breed for its health issues related to breathing difficulties. Additionally, they discuss the inconveniences of encountering dogs in public spaces like restaurants and shopping centers.

Notable Quotes:

• Josh: "French bulldogs... stop torturing these animals by buying them." ([58:52])
• Ben: "We were on tsunami watch here on the West Coast." ([60:37])

The conversation shifts to recent weather events, specifically tsunami watches on the West Coast. They express frustration over misinformation and exaggerated claims about tsunami waves, emphasizing the need for accurate reporting without fear-mongering.

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Conclusion

Throughout the episode, Josh and Ben blend humor with candid discussions, navigating topics from sports enthusiasm and celebrity interactions to personal health scares and listener support. Their banter remains light-hearted yet insightful, providing listeners with both entertainment and relatable content.

Final Notable Quotes:

• Josh: "This is my secret weapon." ([40:03])
• Ben: "You are a great friend and you don't care about the materialistic things." ([53:00])

The episode encapsulates the dynamic chemistry between the hosts, offering a blend of personal stories, audience engagement, and their unique perspectives on everyday issues.

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Note: Advertisements, promotional segments, and non-content sections have been omitted to focus solely on the core discussions and insights shared by the hosts.

Transcript

[Mary Alice Haney]

The following podcast is a dear media production.

[Benzo]

Two Jews, both big and tall. No subject too small for the Good Guys. A mother's dream Premium podcast team. Make it your weekly routine. It's a Good Guys. And if you don't give us five stars. What are you nuts?

[Josh]

What are you nuts?

[Benzo]

Yeah, we're the good guys. They're not the great guys. We're just the good of the good guys. Mazel morons. Welcome back to the Good Guys podcast. I'm sitting here with Mayor Mamdani's Jewish outreach team. It's Benzo.

[Josh]

I promise we come in peace. I promise. Ignore everything we've ever said. Where can we come in peace?

[Benzo]

What's going on?

[Josh]

You look fantastic. I love when you wear a Mets hat. Just reminds me, it's like, God, you're such a New Yorker. You, you and your allegiances. You're not wearing a Dodgers hat. If the Dodgers were to send you free tickets, you'd say, no show, hey, show. No show show, no hey show hey. More like show bye.

[Benzo]

I, I, I would accept the tickets, please. Dodgers send them. Because my son is a massive Dodgers fan. But yeah, it's, it's really hard for me to, to break out New York, or, I'm sorry, to break out of my New York year. Like, I love the Lakers, I loved the Kings, the LA Kings for a very long time. And then they had a big charity game earlier in the year, and I just did not feel like I got the respect that I deserved. And if you're ever going to have a grievance, make it over charity. So the LA Kings, I love you, but I don't like you right now.

[Josh]

Yeah, well, it's fine. Hockey's relevant anyways, and all that I'll have. All that I have to say is the New York Mets, you know, they're playing some fantastic ball. You wear that hat with pride.

[Benzo]

Shout out Steve Cohen, great owner, Pete Alonzo, friend of Ben's.

[Josh]

It's just what they're doing over there is fantastic. And for everybody listening, we are a sports podcast. We're men sometimes. Talk about sports. Let us do it for like a second. Yeah, the Mets. All I know is that the Mets are good. I know nothing else about baseball. I'm sure the Dodgers are good because they spend like $250 trillion a year. They're like the Yankees, the Yankees and the Dodgers. Oh, you're good. Gimme. Oh, you're good. Gimme. The Mets just started playing that game recently. They built a nice foundation. They said, oh, Juan, Soto, you're good. Gimme and throw money at it.

[Benzo]

This is what I do with my problems.

[Josh]

That's the way baseball works. It's pretty crazy. Like unlike other sports, Josh, there's no salary. Captain. Yeah. They can just spend whatever the hell they want. Or maybe there's a cap and there's a fine. I think that's how it works. But like, it's kind of like. Did you see Air the Michael Jordan.

[Benzo]

Movie with Matt Damon and Ben Affleck? Yeah, I did. I tried. Not for me.

[Josh]

Whatever. You probably came. You probably know the story. But like it came, it went.

[Benzo]

Michael Jordan, we know.

[Josh]

No, yeah, I was going to say no, you probably do know. Honestly, the movie was fine. I don't know why. Why Ben Affleck and Matt Damon are making like an indie. Like spend the money. Okay, they did spend.

[Benzo]

That movie cost 80 million do.

[Josh]

Oh, why did I think it costs like seven? Okay, well if they, if they spent the 80 and it looked like that. Oh yeah, we did speak about this. No good, bad movie considering what they spent. But regardless, the, the idea that before Michael Jordan everybody only wore white sneakers and then he introduced the red and paid a fine every game because it was just like cool to be Jordan. Right? Like he was fine paying the fine because it made it cool. And so like these in baseball, I think the Yankees, like, you can spend as much money as you want, you'll pay a fine. That's not what it is in football. That's not what it is in basketball. There are salary caps. So things stay like kind of fair. Baseball doesn't do that. You have like the Rays that spend like a dollar and the Yankees that spend like a billion.

[Benzo]

What's interesting too now, and I think it's across all sports except for hockey, is that the coach isn't allowed to wear a suit anymore and they have to wear team gear.

[Josh]

I had no idea.

[Benzo]

Isn't that wild?

[Josh]

Have you noticed not allowed to wear.

[Benzo]

A suit because they can't brand it. Could you imagine a three piece Carolina Panthers suit?

[Josh]

Totally. They can't.

[Benzo]

A blue turquoise and black suit with a fucking bobcat on the lapel.

[Josh]

They can't brand it. Is that why we don't see suits in the NBA anymore? I thought these coaches were just slacking. I thought they just like didn't care about professionalism anymore and they were like, hey, I'll show up in my raptor hoodie. And now I'm realizing Nick Nurse was just wearing gear.

[Benzo]

Could you imagine a Steve Harvey 5 button suit in Yellow and purp for the lake show.

[Josh]

I love it.

[Benzo]

Fucking imagine.

[Josh]

No, they need to get Walt Frazier to design all the suits for every team. That way everybody will be wearing, like, a little cow skin. You'll get to see that, like, nice patchy white and brown. Ooh, that is fantastic.

[Benzo]

Do you know, speaking of the Chicago Bulls of the great 80s and 90s, do you know my story with Dennis Rodman?

[Josh]

No. No. I love a new story that I haven't heard.

[Benzo]

I. So did you go to.

[Josh]

Did you go to North Korea?

[Benzo]

Pyong Gang Gang, dude. I know I would be the one. I would be like. I would take. Be taking a selfie in front of the great emperor, like, be like, me and Kim. Hashtag, boom. Dead. Word camp over.

[Josh]

Having a good day. All of a sudden you're feeding a hot dog to Kim Jong Un.

[Benzo]

Just cuts to Trump being like, we didn't want to trade Josh Beck. We know he voted for Kamala. I said, listen, Kim, keep him. You know, he could lose 30 bands at least.

[Josh]

Oh, my God, you need more dictators in having a good day. How about now? Just you and Putin.

[Benzo]

Oh, well, there's a famous. There's a great doc of when Rodman went over to North Korea and they have this big state dinner with Kim Jong Un there. And apparently Rodman got shithoused and started giving a toast. And he's like, kim, let's be honest. Your father, he killed a lot of people.

[Josh]

People are like.

[Benzo]

And I think the translator, luckily, or maybe they just venerate basketball and American icons like that so much that Kim was just, like, down to clown. I feel bad even calling him Kim. I feel like I'm going to be beheaded for not calling him the great Emperor.

[Josh]

Kju. Kju. Kju.

[Benzo]

Kimmy Zhang.

[Josh]

He's got to make a university. Kju. I could see it already. Great Varsity Print kju.

[Benzo]

Yeah.

[Josh]

You know, King John University. I love it.

[Benzo]

I mean, maybe it's a dictator vocational school. Like propaganda 101.

[Josh]

How to be a good dictator. I love it. Yeah, I mean, I'm in. Why not, like, harden me up? I'm too soft.

[Benzo]

Intro to beheading.

[Josh]

It's good.

[Benzo]

I don't know how it happened. So I had a podcast before this. It was just interview based called Curious. And I interviewed a bunch of people that I was interested by, and one of them happened to be Dennis Rodman. I don't know how we connected on Instagram, but all I remember is getting a DM from him with the alien face emoji. And I was like, okay. And then I was like, down to clown Dennis. I wonder if I still. I wonder if our. Our back and forth is still recorded. How good would that be? Meta. Come on.

[Josh]

He, look, this is. This is a classic. You got to separate the artists from the art. Dennis Rodman, what a legend.

[Benzo]

God, by the way, I don't follow him anymore. He still follows me. And he only follows 154 people.

[Josh]

Follow him back. Follow him back.

[Benzo]

OK. I just. Did you follow him? I just saw that. Here we go.

[Josh]

I was about to say I need to go follow him. I follow him.

[Benzo]

Oh, we have. Dude. Oh, my God. I don't know. We have huge correspondence, bro.

[Josh]

You have to share some of it.

[Benzo]

Oh, my God. Oh, he just. Okay. July 12, 2019. Here, look. Here's the alien face.

[Josh]

What did you write to that? Hey, what'd you write?

[Benzo]

A like, hey, I wrote, hi, Dennis Rodman. How are you? He wrote, I period want period. You period on period. My period podcast, period. Thumbs up with the darkest skin tone.

[Josh]

By the way. Do you ever just do that? I randomly throw out a black thumb. Why not? I can't use it. I can't use.

[Benzo]

No, you can't, Ben.

[Josh]

Why not?

[Benzo]

It's not. It's not for me to decide.

[Josh]

Okay, okay, that's fine. The white thumb is so pasty.

[Benzo]

You can go like a little like a nice olive skin thumb.

[Josh]

I know, but like, once you're changing your tone, you're like, I might as well just go black. So honestly, they should start it off as a far less pasty white thumb. It's too much, right? Or it's too little. Too little tan, too pasty. I don't want it. If you're sending me that thumbs up, I don't want it.

[Benzo]

I agree. I see that Sometimes they just go, what's like the stock color? Like yellow color. Right? So I'm like, yeah, what can I just do to not offend anyone?

[Josh]

Stocks, fair go stock. Yeah. I have no issues with stock. I have no issues with the stock. Yellow thumb, no issues. So he sends you, the alien. He wants you to come on his podcast. Did you go on his podcast?

[Benzo]

So I write, I'll do yours if you do mine. I'd love to. Thanks for thinking of me. He writes, can period you period be period on period next period week, period.

[Josh]

Do you know hard it is to type like that? Why it's like so inconvenient.

[Benzo]

Question mark, Hart. I write, yes. Where's the studio? It's at this time that His Dave with Dennis's team takes over. Right. So now there's less punctuation. So I, I basically we, we decide that we're going to do two episodes. He's going to go first, I'll be on his, and then we're going to do mine. And I go. And it's kind of. And I don't expect Dennis to know of me. He was actually pretty nice while fairly, you know, just not. I think he got told like, hey, we have a guest. And he has a good social media following. This will be good for the pod. And he was like, oh, okay. And so his pod was more like a little bit Jerry Springer esque. So this couple comes on and Dennis and I are like the relationship experts. And she's like a very buxom beauty in kind of S and M type garb. And, and she's with her sort of wavy, soft, very beta adjacent husband. And they basically present a problem. They go, she says, I really want to feminize my husband. And he refuses to. I really want him to start taking estrogen and slowly to sort of transition into just less male. And he refuses. So I want to let him know today that every night when I give him a foot rub, I've been doing it with estrogen cream.

[Josh]

What the fuck is this? Yeah.

[Benzo]

And, and he's like, you have? And, and she's like, yeah, I've been using estrogen cream to rub your feet. And so I'm like aghast. And I go, that's a crime. I was like, that's a crime.

[Josh]

Yeah, it is.

[Benzo]

You're dosing him against his will with drugs. And she's like, no, it's not. And you know, Dennis is like, hold on, hold on, hear her out. It's like, all right, Dennis, whatever you say. So we had fun. We. And. And then he wound up doing my podcast. Mine came out. Not sure his ever did, but it.

[Josh]

Was probably because she implicated herself in a crime. That would be my guess. You were onto something, Josh. That is a full blown crime. And while Dennis is just like a, you know, don't cancel them before you have the silver bullet.

[Benzo]

It was there.

[Josh]

The silver bullet was there, Josh. She was doomed. So I'm sure they just didn't air it because she would have gone to prison.

[Benzo]

So once it was all said and done, I don't know how to describe it. I felt a little. What's the word? I. I depleted.

[Josh]

Sure.

[Benzo]

And I think also that Dennis had to come on my pod after was not. He didn't Know that he was going to have to do that and he just did not have the energy. But he did it.

[Josh]

It's never a good trade, though. The trading and going second. The first podcast is always better. Get everything out first. I feel like we're always going second, Josh. The next time we do a swap, we're going first.

[Benzo]

What would be. Or anyway, the.

[Josh]

The.

[Benzo]

I want to ask. But the final thing, after I left that day, to his credit, he wrote thank period, you period for period. Coming period on period. Heart.

[Josh]

Great. That means he wants a relationship, Josh. He wants it. He's craving it.

[Benzo]

I'll send the photo.

[Josh]

So, Derek, you should reach back out.

[Benzo]

He'd be great.

[Josh]

You should see if. Yeah. For the podcast or maybe just for, I don't know, a mentor for Max. Yeah.

[Benzo]

Can you imagine?

[Josh]

Why not just like have him come over the house, teach him, by the way, how to be a bruiser. I know Max likes basketball. He could teach him a couple of things. Dennis is one of the greatest rebounders of all time. People forget that because he is a little bit eccentric, right? But this is a six time world champion Michael Jordan adjacent supreme athlete supreme.

[Benzo]

I've heard it said that. I think Phil Jackson was on Rick Rubin's podcast, Tetragrammaton, which is one of my favorites. And he said when Rodman, when they had the opportunity to get Rodman, he went to Michael and Scotty and he was like, look, we. We have the opportunity. Obviously he's known for having, you know, a lot of personality too. And they were like, hold on. They're like, we can get him because when we have to play him, it sucks. Like, please get him. And you're right, people forget. Like they said, it was scary how well he could rebound. Like, it didn't make sense.

[Josh]

He's. He was just like a different breed. He. So many players and like, this is like the problem with the league today. There are. There are no role players. Everybody wants to be the star. And you find that like, of the best teams they seem to have still found like these guys that want to do their job great. They don't need to be the Michael Jordan of the team. Rodman knew his job. I'm never going to shoot today. I'm probably never going to pass today. I'm going to rebound like a maniac. Like, you'll see some stat lines where he had no points, five assists, 25 rebounds because that was his job, playing defense, grabbing the ball and giving it to Michael. And like a role player like that is completely indispensable not everybody can shoot. There's only one person shooting at a time. So, like, the best teams are comprised of guys that like, want to benefit the team. And that was Rodman. God, I love him. Would love to have him on the podcast.

[Benzo]

Denny Rodz. I see that for us. Are you still with us, Dennis?

[Josh]

That's so. That's actually a great call. He could be dead. Is he?

[Benzo]

I don't think so. He's probably working out the Middle east conflict.

[Josh]

Totally.

[Mary Alice Haney]

He's a 4 healthy.

[Benzo]

God bless.

[Josh]

Thank God.

[Benzo]

Thank God, thank God he's right.

[Josh]

This episode of the Good Guys podcast is brought to you by our friends at Function. Folks, I chose Function because it's the only health platform that gives you access to the kind of data most people never see and the insights that actually take action inside Function. You can test over 160 biomarkers from heart to hormones to toxins, inflammation and stress. You can also access multi region MRI and CT scans, all tracked in one secure place. Over time, it's an enhanced view of what's happening in your body. That's why top health leaders like myself. Just kidding, Dr. Mark Hyman, Dr. Andrew Huberman, Dr. Jeremy London are all behind Function Health. What a lineup, folks. Function Health is it. I'm telling you. Okay, so you're gonna go in, okay, 2,000 plus locations across the US for just $499 a year or $1.37 a day. You're gonna get cutting edge health insights. You're gonna get them all in one secure place. And your insights come from top doctors. This could cost you over ten grand if you didn't do it with Function. But we're doing it with Function because we love a good deal. We love a good deal here at the Good Guys podcast. And Function doesn't push supplements or pharmaceuticals. It's just powerful, unbiased health data designed to help you own your health. The BEN software, Longevity Institute of Technology. This is what we're all about, folks. Function Health is our mission statement. You're gonna learn what you're deficient in and then you're going to supplement. Learn, supplement. Okay? It's fantastic, folks. I love it. I did it. The process was so seamless. I signed up, I went into a lab, I got my results. I'm telling you folks, you got to do this. You got to take control of your health. You got to learn what you're deficient in. So folks, learn more and join. Using our link, the first thousand of you get a hundred dollar credit towards your Membership if you visit functionhealth.com goodguys or use gift code goodguys100@signup. I'm telling you folks, you gotta do this to own your own health. Functionhealth.com goodguys this episode of the Good Guys podcast is brought to you by our [e-mail] booking. Yeah. From vacation rentals to hotels across the U.S. booking.com has the ideal stay for anyone, even those who might seem impossible to please. Whether you're booking for yourself, your partner, your sleep light rise, early mom, or your high maintenance group chat, you can find exactly what you're booking for on booking.com, booking. Yeah, folks, booking.com is it. My parents this weekend they're going out east, okay? They're going to the Hamptons. And I thought to myself, you know, why don't I book them a lovely stay in the hamptons on booking.com but knowing my parents, they're not only staying in the Hamptons, they gotta go up and down Long Island. These people, their social calendar is so busy, they're going to a party in Westbury, they're then going to a party in somewhere else in Long Island. So I also booked them a hotel closer, okay, closer to Manhattan. I booked them two hotels. I'm a wonderful son and I use booking.com because I could find exactly what they needed. They love a nice kitchenette, they need a king size bed, they love a balcony. All of these things, all these personal characteristics are what you can find on booking.com and folks, if you're looking for something like a sauna or a hot tub, that's right, they have a filter for that too. You can find that on booking.com because booking.com is, is the greatest place for you and your domestic stays. And if I can find my perfect stay on booking.com, actually if Bruce can find his perfect stay on booking.com, anyone can find out exactly what you're booking for on booking.com, booking. Yeah. Book today on the site or in the app.

[Mary Alice Haney]

Hi, I'm Mary Alice haney.

[Josh]

And I'm Dr. Thais Aliabadi.

[Mary Alice Haney]

Dr. A, as she is known, is a world renowned OB GYN. And together we we're launching a new podcast, SheMD to empower women to become their own health advocate.

[Josh]

We're providing women with the knowledge and tools to really own their own health.

[Mary Alice Haney]

With celebrity guests and today's leading experts. We're dropping episodes every Tuesday. So listen and subscribe on YouTube or wherever you get your Podcasts so you never miss an episode.

[Benzo]

What else is going on with you, Benjamin?

[Josh]

Everything's wonderful, you know, just out here in the Hamptons growing our beautiful boy. Ruby's just splendid. He slept last night, Josh, from 8:30 to 4:30. Ooh, ooh, we got a new swaddle. Have you ever, have you ever tried, I don't know the name of it, it's an arms up swaddle.

[Benzo]

Of course.

[Josh]

This is, this is great. First of all, it's significantly easier to put on. You don't have to do the whole wrap and wrap, which look, if you're a pro, it's no big deal, right? Like us, it's no big deal. That said, his natural tendency, he gets out of the swaddle, he goes like this. So somebody sent to us as a present, this is a wonderful gift and we tried it. And he's sleeping longer I think because he's no longer trying to like struggle to get out of that tight swaddle. He's just here, he's just chilling. He's just chilling. So he's wonderful. Claude is wonderful. Everything is great. I made a gorgeous, I don't know if you saw, I made a gorgeous sea bass corn chowder yesterday. Josh, this was fantastic. Such a good soup. It was probably 100 degrees. I was eating it outside, regretting every choice that I made to make it, but it was so unbelievably delicious. And everything is, everything is just dandy. Just dandy.

[Benzo]

My friend would smoke cigarettes mostly because he's a drug addict in 110 degree days in the San Fernando Valley, which I don't know if you know about. Do you know anything about the valley in L. A? Like you've seen the movie Clueless. You know what people say?

[Josh]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's, it's, I have.

[Benzo]

A love for it. Cause I grew up there. It's the working class suburbs of Los Angeles and but it is a literal valley, so it gets absurdly hot. It could be 105 degrees there and 75 degrees in Santa Monica the same day. Wow. And so respect to. He would rip a dart in 105 degree weather. And one time he was smoking and a cop rolls up on him and pulls up next to him like, oh God, oh God, oh God. And the cop just goes, how are you doing that?

[Josh]

Yeah, I don't know, that's tough. Yeah, that's tough. But really cool, really cool. It's like a cool thing that he can do. I couldn't do that. I couldn't do it the second that it gets warm. No, not for me. I can't drink. I can't smoke. I can't do anything. I just have to immediately get cool. Immediately.

[Benzo]

One more great story about my friend, whom, since I'm going to be telling these stories, make a note of it. Olivia will probably have to bleep his name. Thank you. He was in Texas detoxing from some pretty heavy stuff. And so he decided, like any good addict, I'll just do something else that isn't the drug of my choice to ease the process.

[Josh]

Sure.

[Benzo]

So he decides to get drunk in the bathtub. So he knocks down a bottle of tequila, and he is, like, taking a hot bath, hoping that this is going to help. And it doesn't, and it's not helping. And so he goes, I cannot take this feeling much more. For anyone who knows, coming off of opiates is like, imagine the worst flu you've ever had times 10. Like, it's just hot, cold, throw up coming out of every end of you. It's. It's the worst body aches like you've never felt. And so he decided that he would knock himself out. And then. So he ran into the wall of. Yeah, of. I'm sure, you know, whatever. Spring Hill Suites, maybe, you know, a Fairfield Inn. And he's like. He's like, dog. He's like. But, like, I couldn't do it if I just ran flat. So I ran into a corner, and I was like, dog, that's heavy.

[Josh]

And he made himself pass out.

[Benzo]

He passed out. Yeah. And then he was like. And it made the next six hours easier.

[Josh]

Oh, my God.

[Benzo]

Yeah. He's built like steel, baby.

[Josh]

Wow. What a legend.

[Benzo]

Bring him down.

[Josh]

No. What are we calling him? Rodney.

[Benzo]

We can call him Rodney. I like Rodney.

[Josh]

Cool. Rodney the legend. We need Rodney on the podcast, Josh.

[Benzo]

Oh, man, I got plenty of those.

[Josh]

We need to hear these from the horse's mouth. How are you? Talk to me. Tell me. Meyer Lemon. Tell me. Shy. Give me an update.

[Benzo]

Meyer Lemon is heaven. I'll tell you. Yesterday I had a first Joshi. First I. Have you ever had a proper allergic reaction?

[Josh]

That's a really good question, because all of my allergic reactions are allergies by. By Zyrtec. Like, it's not like.

[Benzo]

So you're like me. You've had. You have allergies, but you don't have an allergic reaction.

[Josh]

I've never had my throat close.

[Benzo]

Well, that's anaphylaxis. But I mean, like, an allergic. Like, hives from your from your head. Head to your toes. Like a rash all over.

[Josh]

Not all over. In a singular spot. I've had a hive. Not full body hives.

[Benzo]

Olivia, you allergic reaction.

[Mary Alice Haney]

I have not had like full body hives, but I have asthma, so I've had like asthma attack from allergies.

[Benzo]

No wonder we get along.

[Josh]

Exactly.

[Mary Alice Haney]

Kindred spirits. But no, not like full body hives ever.

[Benzo]

So I had my first allergic reaction of my life yesterday, and it was freaking cute. Okay, so it was perpetuated by.

[Josh]

And we have to start it just because it's going to be the YouTube thumbnail. Josh almost died.

[Benzo]

Cut this in Jasmine. That's a hundred thousand views.

[Josh]

Wait, tell me what happened. You almost died.

[Benzo]

No, no, I didn't have anaphylaxis. But okay, so. And we. I know I dropped this on the Terry episode, but we can feel free to jump in here. So it was time for my. As we know, I've been micro dosing the terzaps.

[Josh]

Yes. Yes. Bh.

[Benzo]

Welcome. It was time for my stick. It was time for my inject.

[Josh]

Yes.

[Benzo]

And so I did that in the morning.

[Josh]

Where are you putting it, by the way? Where are you injecting?

[Benzo]

Keister. What do you think of that?

[Josh]

It's bold. It's bold.

[Benzo]

It might be a stomach king.

[Josh]

Yeah, I guess you don't really have fat around your stomach. I mean, so there's not much of a place to. God, you look like Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch. You're ripped. Yeah, I guess you gotta do it in your ass. Cause that's where you got it. I can pull here, I can pull here. I go all around. The only thing I'll never do is the hips. It's too scary. I'm not touching my hips. I like the inner thigh. Inner thigh is a good place to do it.

[Benzo]

Stop it. The inner thigh. Olivia, are you okay?

[Josh]

No, not at all. That sounds awful.

[Benzo]

The inner meat.

[Josh]

Yeah. Yeah. That's all fat, baby. That's all fat right there in that meat.

[Benzo]

This podcast right there in that meat.

[Josh]

And then right on the subscribe. Everyone, the keisters.

[Benzo]

Hold on, Ben, you're going. Okay. You're like. Hey, Claude, can you get Ruben ready for the beach?

[Josh]

Yeah. Bam.

[Benzo]

In.

[Josh]

Yeah. Not frequently, but sometimes. Yeah. No, it doesn't hurt. You don't even feel it. You don't feel it at all.

[Benzo]

I wouldn't want that licked, let alone poked.

[Josh]

Oh, yeah, it pokes. It's great. You go inner thigh, I go belly. If you go. By the way, don't go in the same spot more than once. Be careful because you can get a little bubble pocket if you keep injecting in the same place. Is this what happened to you?

[Benzo]

No, no, no. But you get the little itchies sometimes, right? You have a little histamine reaction.

[Josh]

Correct. I'm just like you. You are.

[Benzo]

We're close to you than ever. Okay, so what happens? So I pop myself with that mbd, no big deal. Not even thinking about it. Great. You know, it's from. I get mine from the great Craig Conover. Conover Wellness Shout out. Dr. Conover. The best never let.

[Josh]

Not to be confused with Craig Conover, star of South. I really. I just can't wait for him to like. I'm sure he gets it every day. I think he told us this, but like, people must think he's just like a farmer man. Yeah, farmer man. Really? He's just like a. I don't know, reality star, business owner. They're so different, but they're also. Aren't they both in South Carolina?

[Benzo]

Yeah.

[Josh]

What are the odds?

[Benzo]

I know. I. Yeah. I get my injections from a guy who sells pillows.

[Josh]

Come to Sewing down south on Tuesday for her tirzepatide injection.

[Benzo]

Pillow for your. For your love seat.

[Josh]

Yeah. That's funny.

[Benzo]

But you know, and the doctor, the great Dr. Conover, he's been. I've been injecting stuff from him for. For years on. On the PEPs or the NAD. And so, like, I knew that. I knew that it couldn't be from that. But the problem was, was that I also have been very dry and dry, dry, dry, dry, dry. Because I'm constantly washing bottles and stuff. My hands are in hot water. So, like, my hands are cracking, my feet are cracking. I always put moisturizer on my face, but never really. I'm not like a body lotion guy. I feel like. I feel like a bereaved wife in a one hour drama when I put on lotion.

[Josh]

It's too much. I totally agree with you people. Men. And there are men that. Lotion lotion.

[Benzo]

Right?

[Josh]

Come on, just tell us that you jerk off 24 7. That's the only reason you got that lotion. Okay, I see you, pal. I see you with your cerave. Okay, okay. That's not for your abs.

[Benzo]

Okay?

[Josh]

That's not for you. That's for your grundle, you gross. Yes, nasty.

[Benzo]

Aiden, I know you're gooning again with yourself. You're always gooning with your cerave. It's horrible. Your grandmother was in Auschwitz and here.

[Josh]

You are gooning with cerave. Oh my God. This episode of the Good Guys podcast is brought to you by our friends at Caraway. Folks, you know we love Caraway here at the Good Guys podcast because we love gorgeous cooking utensils that are also non toxic. I don't know. I don't know if I've ever explained to you the origins, okay, of Caraway, but years ago, Caraway founder and CEO Jordan accidentally overheated a non stick PTFE coated pan and got sick with the Teflon flu. What are you nuts? The Teflon flu? After looking into the problem, he found out that it only took 2 1/2 minutes for Teflon coated pans to heat to 500 degrees and begin releasing toxic chemicals in the air. Jordan's mission since has been to make beautiful non toxic cookware worthy of your kitchen. And he has done exactly that. They're absolutely gorgeous. Okay? But. But they also are non toxic. And so you don't have to worry at all. Did you know, folks, the average adult unknowingly consumes over 150,000 plastic particles every year. And over 70% of cooking and baking pans sold in America are coated with PTFes. What are you nuts? And microwaving plastic for three minutes can release over 4 million microplastics. Yuck. Oh my God. I've done that before. I've done that before. They're in me. Folks, if you've been eyeing their Internet famous 12 piece cookware set, now is the perfect time to buy. You can shop Caraway risk free, enjoy fast free shipping, easy returns and a 30 day trial. Plus, if you visit CarawayHome.com GoodTen you can take an additional 10% off your next purchase. This deal is exclusive for our listeners, so visit carawayhome.com good10 or or use code good10 at checkout. Caraway Non toxic cookware made modern. This episode of the Good Guys podcast is brought to you by our friends at Good Wipes. Folks, Good wipes make flushable plant based wipes for your bathroom. Soft, soothing and safe for sensitive skin. Think of them as an upgrade to toilet paper. Better clean, better feel and better for your behind. Folks, if you're still using toilet paper. What are you nuts? You're just smearing around your duty. Yeah, I said duty. Deal with it. Okay, you need wipes. But not only do you need wipes, you need amazing flushable plant based wipes that are soft, soothing and safe for sensitive skin. Okay, folks, that is what good wipes are. I'm Telling you folks they clean better, actually leaving you feel clean. Unlike dry, scratchy toilet paper, 40% bigger and stronger than the average wipes, you need a big wipe for your big booty. Okay, I said it. I said it and I don't take it back. And there's no tearing. Nobody wants a tear. All of a sudden, you have a loose finger in your butt. I really hope they approve this ad. And flushable. And plant breaks down easily and safely. Okay? Very, very, very important. Did I mention that they're super soft, light, fresh scents, leaving you feel refreshed, not irritated at all. So, folks, Good Wipes is giving away free wipes. You want free wipes? I just told you about them and now you get them for free. That's a great deal. Want to try a free pack of Good wipes? Just buy a pack at Target, Walmart, Kroger, or your local store and head to goodwipes.com goodguys text them your receipt and get reimbursed again. That's goodwipes.com goodguYS to get your free wipes. They're free. Why not? They're free, good wipes because butts deserve better. All right, you had an allergic reaction.

[Benzo]

I find some lotion that is just, I don't know, it's under my sink, bro. This is how much I don't think about this kind of stuff. It's three plus years old. I go, oh, this looks like nice stuff. So I like lather up the old hands, lather it up, like on my feet and like my. My legs a little bit, and I don't think twice. And now I'm just, I'm rolling calls. I'm in my day. And throughout my call for about 40 minutes, I'm like, I'm getting steps in, right? So I'm walking from each side of my house, getting steps on the call, but my palms are itchy. And then my neck. And then I'm just like starting to get hot. And I'm like, what is this? And then I go in and I look and I now have, when I tell you, webs of rash all over my body, all over my trunk.

[Josh]

As I told my wife, my trunk.

[Benzo]

I am in a full breakout. And so I finally, I'm like, I literally end the call abruptly. I'm like, I'm so sorry. I have to go. I. I run upstairs. Paige has literally got beautiful Meyer in her arms. And I go, I think I'm having an allergic reaction. She goes, you're having a full blown allergic reaction, kid. Like you're red all over. And I'm like, we should go to the hospital. She's like, no, we shouldn't. You have never had this, but take a Benadryl. I know. So I. I take now. But remember now, right now, I'm. All the wheels are spinning. I know it's not from the terzaps, but I start going, this is what you get, you fuck.

[Josh]

They were right, all these people. It's for diabetics. What am I doing, right?

[Benzo]

I go like a hundred. You lose £100 without. And now you're just greedy.

[Josh]

You're greedy.

[Benzo]

So what do I do? I go and I take a medicinal dose of Zyrtec. Which, by the way, this is not medical advice. This is just what I did. But I took two right away because I know I have a buddy who has an allergic. My buddy Len has something called angioedema. And his doctor once told him, take two, it's better.

[Josh]

I. Look, if Zyrtec D is a thing, why not take two regular Zyrtec? Why not? Sometimes I do it for fun. One in the morning, one at night. Sometimes I chew it.

[Benzo]

Do you? No.

[Josh]

Yuck. That would be sick.

[Benzo]

I popped to. And now I'm laying in bed, but I'm like. I think I'm, like, monitoring my breathing. I run and I go get my pulse ox meter from downstairs. So now I'm taking my oxygen levels and my heart rate. I'm next to Paige. She's feeding Meyer. I got my finger up with the pulse ox. I'm doing a double pulse check with my hand. And I'm like, FaceTime, the kids pediatrician. Because our wonderful pediatrician, Dr. Jesse, who we're friends with, like, she's cool. And so. And I literally. I'm now. So now I'm watching the levels of my oxygen go up. 97, 98. Okay. I'm gonna live. 95, 96, 95. I go, this is not good. This vacillation. This is.

[Josh]

That's low.

[Benzo]

It's not low. 95 and above is pretty good.

[Josh]

Really.

[Benzo]

But thankfully, I'm here. I'm fine.

[Josh]

If I got a 95, I'd be bugging out. By the way, you only own that because of COVID right?

[Benzo]

Initially. But again, not medical advice. But I would. I'm sure you have one. Or if not, get a new one. I find it's a wonderful. A really good thermometer, which spend the dough for a really good one because you want one that's accurate and works with a kid. And oxygen is a Great initial test of how sick your kid is. And so you know those nights where they're so congested, obviously they can't take any medicine for that, and they're a little wheezy or they're like, certain things. I'll just immediately pop that on, take a temp, and if their oxygen's 95 and above and they're not in distress, I can kind of go, all right, we can take a beat. Like, this isn't rushed to the hospital moment. So it's for us. Just speaking for myself, it is a.

[Josh]

Good tool, but nobody owned them before COVID Right. This wasn't a household item. I'm just sitting here thinking to myself, whoever produces the pulse oximeter is made a killing the last couple of years. I have multiple. And all I have to say is mine is always at 99, and if I saw it at 95, I would have thought that I was needed to go to the hospital. I didn't know that. I thought 95 was bad. It's not.

[Benzo]

Bring. Bring yours in next week, and we'll put it on throughout the app. Wow, these things are really getting fucking great. These episodes can lose their podcast, and I promise you it'll vacillate between 95. Anything under 95 is troublesome, but even between 90 and 95, you're pretty stable, but it's just not ideal.

[Josh]

Interesting. Okay. Good to know. Good to know. I will no longer fret. I will no longer fret. But, yeah, that was like the classic. You'd get Covid. You'd throw in that pulse oximeter, and you'd decide in that moment if you were going to live or die.

[Benzo]

Yeah, and you're right. People probably made a lot of money from pulse oximeters. I'm starting to think that people who made the vaccines probably made some dough too now. I'm just kidding. Maybe spice are made out. Okay.

[Josh]

Nah, they lost money.

[Benzo]

Do you want to get to a speak pipe?

[Josh]

Yeah, I do. Wait, but. So you're fine. You popped a couple Zyrtex. It all went away.

[Benzo]

Yeah. And I realized I've never had an allergic reaction.

[Josh]

And. Wait, so you were allergic to your hand cream?

[Benzo]

It was a cream. It was 100%. Because I even said to the pediatrician, she called back. I was like. I was like, I'm. Baby, Baby hurt. I love you, Dr. Jessie. She's the greatest. And she's like. But how? She's like, you've been taking this Tirzepatide now for, like, two or three months, right? Like, no issues. I'm like, zero. And she's like, what'd you do today? That was different. I was like, the cream. She's like, how old is it in, like three years? She's like, you're an idiot.

[Josh]

I didn't know that cream expired either. Not your fault. Brand of cream.

[Benzo]

I don't want to drag them.

[Josh]

Fine.

[Benzo]

It's me with the sensitive.

[Josh]

Big, big brand. Not.

[Benzo]

Not that. But yeah, fairly big.

[Josh]

All I have to say, go buy yourself some nice Keels.

[Benzo]

Best. Keels best.

[Josh]

So good. Fantastic. It's like goop. You stick your hand in this big tub and you come out of it with a just gorgeous amount of moisturizer, and no one will ever think, what word did you use? Instead of yanking the chain or jerking off, what did you use?

[Benzo]

What did I say?

[Josh]

No one will ever think you're gooning if you have a tub of Keels. Okay? No one will ever think that. That's the anti goon. You wouldn't waste it on a goon.

[Benzo]

Only billionaires goon with Keels.

[Josh]

That's why they had to take Keels out of the equinox. Too much gooning.

[Benzo]

It's like a TMZ video. Like Jeff Bezos has been seen gooning with Keels.

[Josh]

How rich is he?

[Benzo]

He's in his own private Amazon. Or we can get to a story.

[Josh]

You want to speak, you pick. Speak. Pipe with. Who's your stalker? Is he still around?

[Benzo]

No, I don't even mention him. Bro, I sent you all the screenshots. Right?

[Josh]

You did. It's too much. This is the last time we're mentioning you. You're scaring Josh, okay? You're not. Hanavi, I'm scared of you.

[Benzo]

Okay? If you want to leave us a message, get some advice, go to speakpipe.com goodguys don't give us your. What are you nuts? We don't like them. Keep it brief. Brevity's key. Let's hear from Maddie. Let's hear from Maddie.

[Maddie]

Hey, good guys. Love the pod. Love being a huge. I just had a quick question with a follow up. So have you guys ever realized that the way you guys talk about hanging out in food is the way long distance couples have phone sex? Just two different topics. I mean, you're coming up with scenarios, different fantasies, what you're gonna eat for your appetizer, your main course, your dessert. Anyways, my main question is, as two city boys that grew up in New York, I'm guessing neither of you guys have gone camping. What would your Camping, spread.

[Josh]

Be.

[Maddie]

That's what I want to know. I need some inspiration. I'm going camping in a few weeks, so just let me know.

[Benzo]

Great, great. Speak pipe.

[Josh]

I have gone camping. But also before we get there. Yes. Josh and I are in a long distance relationship. Fact, I have gone camping. Camping is the absolute best. That said, in terms of a spread, you're limited, okay? You're limited on the spread. Depends on how far you're camping. My personal opinion would be you bring some type of a grill that you can set up, bring a little charcoal, throw something on the strong guy's back, and then bring some meat, throw it on ice. Of course, if you're going for like five days, the meat's going to go rancid. No good. Then you need to pack what, nuts, beans. A can of beans. You open it. Open it with a can opener. But if you're going the camping that I think that you're going, then bring some hot dogs, bring some burgers, keep them on ice. Go set up a little charcoal grill. God, there's nothing better than that. Start a forest fire. You know, it's cute.

[Benzo]

Camp in the Palisades.

[Josh]

I love it. Josh, have you been camping?

[Benzo]

I've never been.

[Josh]

You'd love it. You'd love it. It's great. It's fantastic. It is. Look, and I'm not saying that you do it for a long time. These people that go for three, four days, that's a. What are you, nuts? One night. One night. That's it. Honestly, you don't really need to sleep there. Go set up, have s' mores and then go and stay at a hotel. That's called glamping.

[Benzo]

Totally. And now that there's been modern innovation with these little inflatable portable, like sleep mattresses, I feel like in the 90s, growing up, it was pretty, like not great, but now you can actually like. To me, it was just the sleeping on the ground, which was a non starter. I can't.

[Josh]

It's interesting. I. I can't.

[Benzo]

Or is it? You're just so exhausted from the day, you just conk out.

[Josh]

You're tired. These sleeping bags are really not that uncomfortable. Like, I used to always feel claustrophobic if I didn't open the bottom of the sleeping bag so I could poke out my feet. I think people who fully seal it up, that's a woody. And nuts. Too hot. Okay, too hot. But you leave little room for your feet at the bottom. It's the bed, it's the blanket. You bring your own Pillow your back is going to be. It's more aligned than it's ever been. Josh. It's fantastic. You're letting nature take its course.

[Benzo]

I absolutely. I want to tell you something that I am going to cut out what I do, like, mental cosplay in my head sometimes at night, and I think it's slightly grateful and slightly meshuggah where I tell myself that I'm like a homeless person that just came out, came in from the street. I was so cold.

[Josh]

Oh, my God. All right.

[Benzo]

And so, like, while I'm like, bundled up under the covers and the sheets and just like, oh, thank God. I'm like, just.

[Josh]

By the way, that's a nice way to settle into a night.

[Benzo]

Yeah.

[Josh]

You're in your warm bed for the first time. You're like, who is this woman that I get to sleep next to?

[Benzo]

Yeah.

[Josh]

Because I've been on the streets.

[Benzo]

Yeah, it's been rough out there.

[Josh]

You're nuts.

[Benzo]

I think for. Don't you think too, though, if you didn't want to refrigerate anything, what would be great? Like, I love. I guess you'd have to bring like a little one of those mini stoves. But I love oatmeal. I guess you could do. What's it called, you know, the next day? Oats. What's it called?

[Josh]

Overnight oats.

[Benzo]

Overnight oats you could bring. And we make those in our. When we're done with a peanut butter jar and there's like peanut butter on the sides, we'll do overnight oats in there. So you bring a couple of those. You could do like a full. Like, isn't there some cheeses that don't need to be refrigerated?

[Josh]

I don't know. I've thrown like a loose polio in my bag and had it the next day. That was, like, kind of gross, but I don't think I was gonna die.

[Benzo]

I don't think they're refrigerating. Like when you. When they split open like a parmesan wheel or whatever. That shit's not refrigerated.

[Josh]

No, but, like, who wants, like, warm blue? Like, yeah, you don't need to refrigerate blue cheese because it ferments. But, like, imagine having warm blue.

[Benzo]

Yum. But, like, you get like, I think you could bring a nice charcuterie spread. Like, you could definitely bring like some canned. I mean, granted, you're not gonna be hooking up some canned fish.

[Josh]

Some canned fish and some big ass deli meat that you literally, like, throw over your Back like a big salami log.

[Benzo]

Like a quasi jerky.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Benzo]

Crackers.

[Josh]

Fantastic. Ooh, I love it.

[Benzo]

I think that's a move.

[Josh]

A really sharp machete and just like fruit ninja. That big beautiful salami. Wow. All right. We are in a long distance relationship. That speedpub was right. This is my.

[Benzo]

You don't mind being beautiful salami.

[Josh]

I want a fruit ninja. You. This episode of the Good Guys podcast is brought to you by our friends at Applebee's. Folks, the 2 for 25 deal is back. That's right. You get two entrees and an appetizer for just 25 bucks. And this economy, completely unheard of. And I'm here to tell you that there are new menu items. The chicken parm fettuccine and the big bangin burger are two gorgeous new entrees that are a part of the 2 for 25. You are going to love it. So, folks, if you want to order in or, I would highly recommend going in. Okay, go into Applebee's, get the two for 25, get a chicken parm fettuccine, get a big bangin burger, throw in a side of the, I don't know, spinach, artichoke dip. Bring a friend, get unlimited soda. That's right, free refills. Okay, you're buying one, so it's not really unlimited, but then it's free refills. And then relive your childhood at the Bees. Remember, life was so simple. We'd go to suburbia, catch a flick, hit an Applebee's. God, I wish it was. What year was that? 2006. God, I wish it was 2006 to 2014. Life was so simple. That is a big gap. But life was so simple. You know what else is simple, folks? This deal. Two. Two for 25. Two entrees, one appetizer, 25 bucks. So many options to choose from, so many entrees, so many apps. You're gonna love it. You're gonna love it, folks. Okay, so go into Applebee's today and get their 2 for 25 deal. With brand new dishes for a limited time only guests can choose one appetizer and two entrees, like the new chicken parmesan fettuccine and new Big bangin burger for 25 bucks. That's all, folks. That is all. This episode of the Good Guys podcast is brought to you by our friends at Prolon. Folks, swimsuits, sunshine, and spontaneous plans. Yep, summer is here. But if you're not feeling it this season, I've got news for you, Prolon's five day fasting mimicking diet is your summer ready secret weapon. The ultimate tool for a metabolism reset, fat loss, lean muscle protection and more. Prolon delivers a summer glow up from the inside out and in just five days. It's my secret weapon. And it totally works. Because Prolon is a plant based nutrition program featuring soaps, snacks and beverages designed to nourish the body while keeping it in a fasting state, triggering cellular rejuvenation and renewal. NextGen builds on the original Prolon with 100% organic soups and teas, a richer taste and ready to eat meals. Folks, you gotta try NextGen if you haven't tried it yet. And it's been developed over decades at USC's Longevity Institute and backed by top U.S. medical centers, Prolon has been shown to support biological age reduction, metabolic health, skin appearance, fat loss and energy. We need all of that. So try Prolon. I'm telling you folks, I've tried Prolon before. It's amazing. When you're having just too many cravings, you're having too many Swedish candies, you need a reset. Okay? You need a reset. And Prolon is that reset for me. Five days and you're feeling like yourself again. For a limited time, you can be the first in line to experience the new next gen. It's special savings. Prolon is offering Good Guys listeners 15% off site wide plus a $40 bonus gift. When you subscribe to their five day nutrition program, just visit prolonlife.comgoodguys that's P-R-O-L-O-N-L-I F E.comgoodguys to claim your 15% discount and your bonus gift, prolonlife.comgoodguYS.

[Benzo]

Okay, next one's from Kara.

[Kara]

Hey morons. Let me know if I am being a moron. So I'm having my first baby in September. Congrats to you too on your two beautiful babies. I'm also having a boy. So I created a gift registry for my baby shower and I included things on there that literally cost, you know, $5 all the way up to $250. All new things because this is my first baby. I had somebody invited to the baby shower that sent me a text message. They went out of their way to send a text message to say, aren't you getting hand me downs from your sisters and friends? Am I nuts for thinking that's like crazy to go out of your way to ask me that? This is my first baby. I don't have Anything. My sister has four kids, so most of her stuff is absolutely trashed and she's not giving it to me. It really, really annoyed me for about the past three weeks because that's how long ago this happened. So let me know if I'm crazy. Love you guys.

[Josh]

Thanks. You're not crazy. This is no friend, like, who comments on somebody's registry. Just don't buy it. Like, that's a woody and nuts. Like, registries are places where you put things that if somebody should want to buy you a gift, this is what you'd. You'd hope. And you said that you put things from $5 to $205. It's the nicest registry ever. The fact that you give somebody an opportunity to give you a $5 gift, that means that you're a great friend and you don't care about like the, like the materialistic things. And this person to come out of your way and say that you shouldn't put clothing on it because you have hand me downs is just like a nasty person. So no, you're not a moron. She is, She's a. She's a moron.

[Benzo]

And it's your first kid. Like there are people who have like, like you were sweet enough to ask, do you guys have a registry? But of course, for our third kid, we would never register for a thing because sure, it was so nice that people actually were like, oh, you're having a third kid like six years after your first. You probably need some updating. Let us gift you some stuff and shout out, baby, listen. But yeah, we wouldn't register because it would just feel like pushing it. But your first kid, like, it's so wonderful to get all this new great stuff. Like it takes a village.

[Josh]

It's amazing. And like putting Ruby in like a new cute outfit is the best. And we definitely couple it like he uses some of Jackie's kids onesies or like whatever.

[Benzo]

Sure.

[Josh]

But like, yeah, you should have some new stuff that you actually picked out. I wonder if that girl, does she have any of her own clothing or she only wears hand me downs.

[Benzo]

Right?

[Josh]

Like that's like a crazy, it's a crazy, crazy thing to say. One quick comment on registries. If somebody has a registry, the only appropriate thing to do if you're not going to shop from the registry is to give them a gift card to somewhere like an Amazon where it's easy to shop. Do not go to a random store and buy them something that they do not need because eight, maybe they don't shop There, maybe it's nowhere near them. And they now have like some loose $40 credit to home Goods. Home Goods would be great, but like, I've seen this before and it's like you think that you're doing something nice by getting something from. From somewhere random. Get it, make it convenient for the person so just in case they have to make returns. That's all.

[Benzo]

Oh, I have five year old Jamba Juice and Cold Stone Creamery gift cards. When am I gonna use it exactly?

[Josh]

No, there's nothing. I mean, Jamba, give it to me. I'll use it in the Newark Airport. But besides that, I don't know where another Jamba is. And Cold Stone, I'm ready to buy all the cold stones and turn them into my chicken emporium.

[Benzo]

I mean, I love those places and I've been over the last five years, but, like, I don't carry those gift cards with me all the time. And I'm not gonna say, you know.

[Josh]

There is no reason to get somebody a gift card to a specific place. I'm now thinking about this for the first time, Josh. And we both love restaurant gift cards. Why wouldn't. Just in case, let's say you wanted to get me a gift card to Hillstone, why wouldn't you get me a $250 gift card to American Express? And write in the note, I recommend you use this on Hillstone. But in case you don't, you can use it on something else.

[Benzo]

You know, I don't believe in those. You know, I don't believe in credit cards like that.

[Josh]

Yes, because you got screwed from that random company. But it's fine. Amex is fine. What was the name of the one that still owes you $300?

[Benzo]

Gift card? Granny.

[Josh]

You have to believe in an American Express gift card. There's nothing wrong with it. You can use it anywhere, on anything.

[Benzo]

No. Shout out American Express. It's an incredible company. Not as good as Discover, but. What? Well, no, my beef is not with the credit card companies. They're wonderful. My beef is just like, if you're truly gonna get, why add a step? Just hand me 300 bucks, then give me cash.

[Josh]

Okay, sure. Sorry. The King's gift.

[Benzo]

Don't dress it up.

[Josh]

Yeah, the King's gift is cash. I'm just saying, the restaurant gift card. Now that I'm thinking about it for the first time, why can't it be a heartfelt note with $300 that says, I hope you use this at Hellstone? That's what it was intended for. Just in case Hillstone is booked out for the next three months and you want to use this $300 on something else, feel free. Love, Josh.

[Benzo]

Amazon, babe.

[Josh]

Yeah, Amazon's great. Amazon is unbelievable. You can use it for anything. I think Uber's pretty good too, because not only can you use it on rides, you can also use it on ordering in. Uber eats. It's the same general credit love. Pretty good, right?

[Benzo]

Should we get to our Woody and Nuts?

[Josh]

Yeah, we should.

[Benzo]

Our Woody and Nuts moment of the week are our gripes with people, places and things both big and tall, whatever, sticking in your craw. You got one, Ben?

[Josh]

I do, I do. It's the French bulldog breed, Josh.

[Benzo]

Okay?

[Josh]

The entire breed is a. What do you. Nuts. Claudia and I are out to a gorgeous sushi meal. We're sitting outside, me, Claudia, and Ruby. It's outside, sort of on the sidewalk, and there's a woman sitting with her French bulldog on a bench, like, next to us. She's not in the restaurant. She's just there with her dog. Her dog is there, like, the whole meal for an hour. This dog is so. And that's not because it was thirsty. It's because these dogs are bred to not be able to breathe. French bulldogs, all of them die. Bulldogs die. The breed, they can't breathe. What are you, nuts? Stop torturing these animals by buying them. I'm sorry. This is not an animal that should exist. I'm sure you have a beautiful French bulldog that you love because he's cute, but he can't breathe, sister. He can't breathe.

[Benzo]

Word up.

[Josh]

It's really a duel. What do you. Nuts. It's against the breed, but it's also, if you have a loud fucking dog, take him away from me. Me. Okay? I'm trying to eat in peace. Do you hear your dog? He's like a noise machine.

[Benzo]

You missed out on the first biggest witty in that spin, which is, why is your dog at the restaurant?

[Josh]

No, he wasn't. The dog is on a park bench across the street next to the restaurant. You know how all of these restaurants now have outdoor seating that's basically just on the street?

[Benzo]

Mm.

[Josh]

So right next to it, there's a public bench, and the dog is sitting on the bench, and you can hear this dog from the bench.

[Benzo]

But I also think I recently saw this woman have a dog in Target. And I was like, we're at Target. Like, and this was not a special. You know, this was not a.

[Josh]

A fake service dog. Is that what you were gonna say?

[Benzo]

Yeah.

[Josh]

This isn't Something where you printed it out online and said that it's a service dog and brought it in. Yeah. There are, like, six people in the world with real service dogs. Okay. You with your Chihuahua.

[Benzo]

Yeah.

[Josh]

Falling for that shit.

[Benzo]

I. I'm just. Yeah, I. I feel like we've. We're losing some decorum, but, yeah, don't.

[Josh]

Bring your dog to. Also, it's an inconvenience for you to bring your dog grocery shopping. Do you know you need your hands. What are you doing? The dog doesn't want to be there. Okay.

[Benzo]

No, I think your dog likes Publix.

[Josh]

I mean, maybe, but you think it would.

[Benzo]

What, does Fido on a pub sub?

[Josh]

Yes.

[Benzo]

Leave him at home.

[Josh]

Yes.

[Benzo]

Okay. My Woody and Nuts is. I don't know if you heard this, but we were on tsunami watch here on the West Coast.

[Josh]

Like, maybe. Okay. Yes. Tell me. Okay. You have tsunami.

[Benzo]

Did you bear down? Did you batten down the hatches?

[Mary Alice Haney]

God, no. How could it have I not to. Yeah, that's just a. What are you nuts?

[Benzo]

I don't want to make light of. Obviously, tsunamis can be terrible events, and. But what was interesting was, thank God, after the threat had passed, there were all these videos of different California cities, and they go, look at the tsunami waves in Redondo Beach. Look at this. They're just waves. Not so big. These are the. What are you, nuts? Show me.

[Josh]

Give me a wave.

[Benzo]

You're gonna give me a wave. 50ft, 60ft. This was like. I could boogie board this. This is a tsunami wave.

[Josh]

No. No fear mongering. No good. Don't fear monger with the weather also, la. What are you, nuts? You got the. The highest. The heat, the. The warmest of warm and the coldest of cold. It's crazy over there. Fires and tsunamis.

[Benzo]

We're nuts. We got it all going on, babe.

[Josh]

You know what else is nuts? Josh? Not giving this episode five stars. We started with Dennis Rodman. We made it all the way to tsunamis. Woody and Nuts. Listen to us wherever you get your podcast. Watch us on YouTube, share our clips, Instagram and TikTok. Mondays and Thursdays, folks. We will see ya next time.

[Benzo]

Please note that this episode may contain.

[Josh]

Paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services.

[Benzo]

Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.