Pool Sharks and Horse Girls

Summary

Podcast Summary: Good Guys – "Pool Sharks and Horse Girls" (January 30, 2025)

Hosts: Josh Peck & Ben Soffer

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1. Navigating Los Angeles: Congestion Tax and Commuting Challenges ([00:18] – [11:12])

In the opening segment, Josh Peck and Ben Soffer delve into the intricacies of commuting in Los Angeles amidst chilly weather conditions. Ben shares his frustration with the cold, highlighting how it affects his daily travel habits. The conversation swiftly transitions to the impact of the congestion tax on rideshare services like Uber and Lyft.

Key Points:

• Congestion Tax Mechanics: Ben explains the day-to-day financial implications for rideshare drivers, noting that while drivers charge passengers a $4 congestion fee per trip, Uber only pays a $9 daily tax. For drivers completing multiple trips, this results in a significant profit margin exceeding the actual tax expense.

• Alternative Transportation Preferences: Both hosts express their dissatisfaction with rideshare services. Josh advocates for traditional taxis, while Ben prefers driving himself, even if it means risking parking fines.

Notable Quotes:

• Ben Soffer ([00:21]): "What are you nuts?!"
• Ben Soffer ([01:39]): "Why? We have it?"
• Josh Peck ([05:00]): "It's super smart."

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2. Strategic Parking and Avoiding Tickets ([02:12] – [11:12])

Continuing their discussion, Josh and Ben brainstorm strategies to minimize the risk of getting pulled over while navigating the city's parking regulations.

Key Points:

• Risk Assessment: Ben embraces a proactive approach by strategically parking near potential tow zones, accepting the likelihood of occasional fines to save time. Conversely, Josh shares his experience with using the Fast Track LE lane, which adjusts fees based on traffic conditions and the number of passengers in the vehicle.

• Legal Insights: The hosts touch upon advice from attorney Hugo Lord, emphasizing the importance of complying during traffic stops to avoid complicating legal situations.

Notable Quotes:

• Ben Soffer ([02:44]): "Getting towed is no good."
• Josh Peck ([06:25]): "Comply now, fight later."
• Ben Soffer ([07:06]): "What's the problem?"

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3. Pool Halls vs. Bowling: A Social Sport Showdown ([16:05] – [22:00])

After a brief interlude, Josh and Ben shift gears to discuss their experiences with pool halls and bowling alleys, advocating for the former as a more engaging and socially interactive activity.

Key Points:

• Social Dynamics: Ben recounts a family outing to Amsterdam Billiards, praising his mother's unexpected prowess as a "pool shark." He highlights the communal atmosphere of pool halls, where players can converse and interact more freely compared to the individualistic nature of bowling.

• Equipment Preferences: The hosts humorously debate the quirks of bringing personal equipment to pool halls, with Ben noting the rarity of players bringing their own pool balls, while Josh appreciates the quality of professional pool sticks.

Notable Quotes:

• Ben Soffer ([16:05]): "Pool, very underrated."
• Josh Peck ([18:40]): "Great time. No, no, no. Definitely not."
• Ben Soffer ([19:29]): "That's a lifetime guarantee."

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4. Planning the Ultimate NYC Walk ([24:00] – [30:02])

Josh and Ben embark on a lively discussion about organizing a comprehensive walk through New York City, aiming to capture the city's essence while enjoying diverse culinary experiences.

Key Points:

• Route Mapping: The duo considers walking from Battery Park up through various neighborhoods, stopping at iconic eateries like Joe's Pizza and Golan Heights. They discuss meal planning to sustain energy throughout the journey, opting for portable snacks like herobread hand holders.

• Engaging the Community: Encouraging listener participation, they invite audience suggestions for additional stops, fostering an interactive and community-driven planning process.

Notable Quotes:

• SelgamingJosh Peck ([26:17]): "We're going to start up and go down. We're going to end in Battery Park at night."
• Ben Soffer ([27:57]): "This is brought to you by Herobred."

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5. Fashion Faux Pas: Inauguration Outfit Critique ([34:09] – [38:11])

The conversation takes a turn towards fashion and social media dynamics as Josh and Ben react to Whitney Cummings' remarks about Lauren Sanchez's inauguration attire.

Key Points:

• Social Media Reactions: Whitney Cummings publicly critiques Lauren Sanchez's white Alexander McQueen pantsuit, particularly focusing on the peekaboo lace bra. While Sanchez gracefully accepts the feedback with a heart emoji, Josh and Ben express mixed feelings about the criticism.

• Public Perception: The hosts debate the validity and impact of public figures mocking each other's fashion choices, reflecting on the broader implications for personal style and public image.

Notable Quotes:

• Ben Soffer ([35:05]): "I'm so rich. And all that I care about is if daddy Jeff cares."
• Josh Peck ([35:14]): "I agree. I thought it looked like watching Zuckerberg, Bezos, Elon up there."

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6. Controversial Acts: Self-Performed Vasectomy ([38:05] – [44:05])

In a surprising and eyebrow-raising segment, Josh and Ben discuss a shocking event where a surgeon performed a vasectomy on himself and documented it on social media for educational purposes.

Key Points:

• Ethical Concerns: The hosts express disbelief and concern over the appropriateness and safety of such a procedure being performed and broadcasted without medical supervision.

• Personal Grooming: The discussion naturally flows into personal grooming habits, including shaving and waxing, with Ben sharing his routine and contemplating more extensive grooming practices.

Notable Quotes:

• Josh Peck ([38:11]): "He's a doctor."
• Ben Soffer ([40:40]): "But I do want to get fully waxed one day."

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7. Listener Stories: "What Are You Nuts?" Segment ([45:20] – [54:03])

Wrapping up the episode, Josh and Ben engage with listener-submitted stories, humorously identifying the "nuts" in various everyday scenarios.

Key Points:

• Dryer Dilemmas: A listener recounts incidents where important clothing was lost due to faulty dryer replacements, prompting debates on responsibility and common sense.

• Restaurant Etiquette: Another story highlights patrons overstaying their welcome at restaurants after paying their bills, leading to frustration and comedic takes on proper dining etiquette.

• Miscellaneous Gripes: Additional anecdotes include overpriced club sodas and the inconvenience of handling excessive small bills, all met with the hosts' signature banter and lighthearted judgment.

Notable Quotes:

• Ben Soffer ([48:05]): "He's nuts. It's not her fault, totally."
• Josh Peck ([49:33]): "I do something I would do."
• Ben Soffer ([53:05]): "That's your attention span. What are you, nuts?"

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Conclusion

Throughout "Pool Sharks and Horse Girls," Josh Peck and Ben Soffer offer a blend of insightful discussions, personal anecdotes, and comedic interactions. From dissecting the challenges of urban commuting to navigating social interactions in pool halls and beyond, the hosts engage listeners with relatable content and entertaining banter. Their ability to weave humor into everyday topics makes for an engaging and enjoyable podcast experience.

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Notable Feature:

• Interactive Engagement: The episode encourages listener participation through the "What Are You Nuts?" segment, fostering a sense of community and interaction among the audience.

Recommendation: For those interested in urban lifestyle topics, social dynamics, and lighthearted humor, "Good Guys" – "Pool Sharks and Horse Girls" is a compelling listen that balances practical insights with entertaining storytelling.

Transcript

[Josh Peck]

The following podcast is a dear media production. Two Jews, both big and tall. No subject too small for the good guys. A mother's dream. Premium podcast team. Make it your weekly routine. It's a good Guys.

[Ben]

And if you don't give us five stars.

[Josh Peck]

What are you nuts?

[Ben]

What are you nuts? Yeah, we're the good guys.

[Josh Peck]

They're not the great guys. We're just the good of.

[Ben]

Good of the good guys.

[Josh Peck]

How the hell are you, Benjamin?

[Ben]

Oh, man, I'm freezing. Like, I don't know if you. How cold is it in Los Angeles? Are you experiencing a bit of a wind chill, mid-50s? Josh, it's 10. It's 10 degrees here, and, like, 10 is.

[Josh Peck]

We're experiencing a wind fire, not a wind chill. But, yes, please go.

[Ben]

Yeah, I guess I shouldn't be complaining, but it's really just, like, so cold. And you don't want to leave the house. And when I do leave the house, we're driving everywhere. You know that? To get here, Josh, I think I blew through four red lights, rode the bus lane for at least half a mile. I'm expecting at least one ticket, but we're good. We're good. We're cold and we're. We're here and cheery, and I'm wearing a sweatshirt I don't normally wear. Like, I'm normally in a t shirt. I'm Mr. T shirt, Mr. Shorts. Like this can. I don't know if you can see my breath, but that. I don't think the heater's working at Toast Studios either.

[Josh Peck]

I'm just upset you're gonna have to pay congestion tax.

[Ben]

Okay, Josh, it's important. Let me explain to you what I just found out. Here we go. Do you know why we have a congestion tax? Really? Why? We have it?

[Josh Peck]

Because of Lyft and Uber.

[Ben]

You knew this already? Do you know how much money. So the congestion tax is $9 a day, right? You get in an Uber and they're charging you $4 a pop for congestion.

[Josh Peck]

No good.

[Ben]

But they're paying $9 once. Let's say they do 10 trips a day, 15 trips a day. They're charging $60 in congestion tax, but they're only paying nine. They're netting an extra $51 in profit, this Uber, when it's only costing nine. So all I have to say is. What? Are you nuts?

[Josh Peck]

I'm anti rideshare. I'm pro taxi.

[Ben]

I'm anti rideshare. I'm pro taxi, but I'm really pro driving. Drive everywhere. What's the Worst thing that can happen, you park at a hydrant. You're. Honestly, Josh, I'm getting a ticket. One in every 10 times.

[Olivia]

Why wouldn't I drive?

[Ben]

I'm parking wherever I want. No standing. I'll stand. I'll stand. You'll see me standing. Okay, hydrant. No problem. Ride the bus lane. No problem. It's worth a $50 ticket once every two weeks to get places faster. The Uber, on the other hand, would be 60. So what's the problem?

[Josh Peck]

You have slow, kid. Good luck. That's the problem in that, yeah, it's possible you're blessed, because I think God goes, he's so pure, he's so good, he blows into his hands on a podcast.

[Ben]

I'm so cold, I might as well be outside. Like, I am freezing.

[Josh Peck]

I mean, I wish that people could see you now in your chinos and your white Air Force ones blowing into your hands like you're in the tundra.

[Ben]

You're in Midtown.

[Josh Peck]

You're across from the Waldorf Astoria.

[Ben]

You have no idea how cold I am. Like, it. Really. It's freezing in here, but this is the cross I have to bear, Josh. It is what it is.

[Josh Peck]

If you go in front of a hydrant and you get towed, that's all bad, right? Like, that's your biggest fear.

[Ben]

Awful. Going to the pound is an experience. And if you don't call it the pound, get the hell out of here. Yeah, okay. The pound is an experience. These people. This is if you. If you got a complaint at the DMV on your record and you were fired, you go to work at the pound. This is the worst of the worst of the worst. These people hate you. They don't want to be there. No good. You go all the way to the west side highway, you're spending $500 to retrieve your vehicle. Yes. Getting towed is no good. So you have to be careful. I want to be clear. I'm not parking in a bus lane on Fifth Avenue. I'm strategic. I'm thinking to myself, if I was a cop, where would I tow? And if there's any chance I think of towing. No. Going nowhere near that. That's a bad game to play. It's a bad game to play.

[Josh Peck]

You're a wild kid. The only thing that I really push is I do. I do the fast track LE in Los Angeles, where they have a dedicated lane with an easy pass and you have a transponder, and at any time of the day. And it vacillates. Right. So if there's not A lot of traffic, it'll be like A$50. But if there's a lot of traffic, it could be anywhere towards like $12 to be able to be in this lane and.

[Ben]

Wait, what? I don't know this. They charge you different amounts of money based on the time of day to be in a lane.

[Josh Peck]

Sure. It makes sense. If you want to be in the fast track lane, which basically is completely open in the.

[Ben]

I love it. This is capitalism at its finest. I didn't even know that this existed.

[Josh Peck]

It's super smart.

[Ben]

Okay, so you. Depending on time of day, you can pay more money to get somewhere faster.

[Josh Peck]

Yeah. And then. And it also depends on how many people are in your car. So if you have three people in your car, you're going to pay less than if you're just by yourself. But they, they take a picture as you enter and they take a picture as you leave. And if you don't have the transponder, you're going to have to pay that plus a fee. And I'm. I'm paying fees left and right. Today. I just paid off $220. Nuts. If I had the transponder, it would have been like 12.

[Ben]

Oh my God. I'm sorry. What about Josh? Do you think that they know that they're human beings? Or could you get like inflatable sex dolls and put them in the front and two in the back and look like you're four on the camera?

[Josh Peck]

So I tried it and.

[Ben]

You'Re like, been there, done that.

[Josh Peck]

They did catch me, but. But I did feel less lonely, so it's a wash. They call that in Vegas a push.

[Ben]

A push. Okay. Wow. Yeah. No. All right, so you're not that crazy, but this is something that we need in New York. We need this. I guess I'm doing it anyways, though. You ride the bus lane. The best part about this new system where they take a picture and then send you a ticket. At least I don't have to get pulled over. They stop pulling people over. I do crazy things. I'll never get pulled over. They'll send it to me in the mail. And the worst part is getting pulled over because that's a time suck. You're scared. The ticket in the mail. No problem. No problem at all.

[Josh Peck]

There's a talk attorney, I think his name is Hugo Lord. Shout out. And he always says about when. When, once. When once is getting pulled over. Comply now, fight later. Comply now.

[Ben]

Of course, later.

[Josh Peck]

And that's what I do, man. You pull me over. Get ready for the best 12 minutes of your life, officer. Because you know what I do when you pull me over here? Knock on my window when you pull me over here. Ready? Pull me over. Pull me over.

[Ben]

Get out of the car.

[Josh Peck]

No, no. I'm not getting my constitutional right. You have to say what happened. Walk up here. Look, you see my hands?

[Ben]

I got nothing.

[Josh Peck]

No, no, I got. Sir, I've got nothing. My hands are out of the window. I always do hands out the window. So you go, look at this. Not hiding anything. What's going on?

[Ben]

You don't think that's, like, too much? You don't think that's too much? You don't think that then makes him think, hmm, I should check his trunk?

[Josh Peck]

No.

[Ben]

Why is he doing so much?

[Josh Peck]

Check my trunk for what? A couple inhalers? Here, knock, knock on my window. This is what I. This is what I say.

[Ben]

Knock, knock, knock. Excuse me, sir.

[Josh Peck]

You got me. Good job. When they go, you know what I'm pulling you over for?

[Ben]

For?

[Josh Peck]

I go, don't matter. You're right.

[Ben]

You're right.

[Josh Peck]

When's the last time a police officer heard, you're right?

[Ben]

Certainly not from me. I literally. He's like, sir, you were going 75 and a 25. I'm like, I don't think so. He's like, I have it on. Like on the speedometer. No, but that's fine.

[Josh Peck]

I'll tell you. Another tip and trick from the good Hugo, Lord of TikTok.

[Ben]

This is a great name. Yugo Lord.

[Josh Peck]

I could totally have made it up. Do you know why I'm pulling you over? Is a leading question. Setting you up. Wait, what did you say?

[Ben]

I thought you were asking me. I'm like, no, I don't know.

[Josh Peck]

Perfect answer. Do I. Do you know why I pulled you over? As a leading question? For you to incriminate yourself. You have no. You are not required to answer that, and you will inevitably incriminate. No, you pull me over. Why are you pulling me over? Don't say it like that. Say it like I did. You're right. You know, you're right.

[Ben]

Yeah, you're right. And you're absolutely right.

[Josh Peck]

Keep a couple Starbucks gift cards, you know, in your console. They call that bribing. I call that nice. You know, what do you do, Josh.

[Ben]

If you really shouldn't have been pulled over? Like, I'm sure that you've experienced. You're on 70 and a 65 and a cop had a bad day. Have you had that before? Absolutely, because I've had that on the way to Atlantic City. And this is a New Jersey state trooper. And they come out with that big ass hat and you're like, oh, my God, I'm going to sing. Sing. They're frightening. They're frightening. There's just something about a state trooper where I look at them and I'm like, oh, my God, you're right. You're right, you're right, you're right. Please. Yeah, please, just. Just please have mercy on me. Please.

[Josh Peck]

State troopers and motorcycle cops are a different breed, too. And I've literally had a motorcycle cop pull me over. And I said, so anyway. And I knew I was wrong, but I was like, anyway, you can let me offer this. And he goes, bro, I'm a motorcycle cop. I live for this. He said that it's his only job. Yeah, to give tickets.

[Ben]

You think that anybody's ever been pulled over on a horse?

[Josh Peck]

Oh, yeah, my friend did. Smoking weed in his car. My buddy got pulled over with a.

[Ben]

Cop on a horse.

[Josh Peck]

Well, he was parked. My buddy AJ was getting stoned in his car. And all of a sudden he hears and he goes.

[Ben]

That would end my life. I would have the panic attack of the century. I just die.

[Josh Peck]

Can you imagine, though, the horse head? You're stone on some bad. Like, some bad cushion. The horsehead comes down like. Like, that's some heralding Kumar shit. Like, are you seeing this, Ben?

[Ben]

It's an absolute nightmare.

[Josh Peck]

Is there a motherfucking horse in my window?

[Ben]

Nightmare. Like, I see these horses in the city, Josh. This is no place for a horse. No place for a police horse with their feet on the cobblestone. Imagine going through Tribeca. They can't just bumping around. They're up here. Their hooves hurt. It's no good.

[Josh Peck]

Horses are such majestic, stunning creatures. Wait, more importantly, Olivia, did you have a horse phase?

[Hugo Lord]

Does it seem like I did?

[Josh Peck]

Every girl has.

[Hugo Lord]

I had a very, very brief horse phase. I went, yeah, I did. I was age 10, and I went for my birthday. And then the. I went one more time, like a couple months after that. And it was awful. The horse's name was Bozo, and one of them, like, bucked somebody off and the lady broke her arm. It was bad.

[Ben]

I'm sorry. It's. It's the owner's fault. If you name a horse Bozo, what are you expecting from him? Like, that's not good.

[Hugo Lord]

The horse had a right. The horse fully had a right to buck.

[Josh Peck]

That.

[Ben]

He had the right.

[Olivia]

This episode of the Good Guys podcast is brought to you by our Friends at Prolon. Full disclosure. I've never been very good about keeping New Year's resolutions. I'm sure you haven't either. Whenever I say I want to lose weight or I want to be healthier in the new year, it's unlikely my resolution is going to stick, typically because.

[Ben]

I don't have a plan.

[Olivia]

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[Ben]

We're tricking them.

[Olivia]

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[Ben]

I feel amazing.

[Olivia]

Prolon isn't like any other diet I've tried because it's not a diet. It's truly science. It was so convenient. They sent me everything I needed all in one box and I'm telling you this was the reset I needed after a heavy holiday season. Just in time for the new year, Prolon is offering Good Guys listeners 15% off their five day nutrition program for your post holiday. Glow up when you go to prolonlife.com goodguys that's P R O L-O-N L I F E.com goodguys for 15% off prolonlife.com goodguYS I told you, Josh, maybe.

[Ben]

This was like a year and a half, two years ago I rode a horse, Hannah up a mountain in Utah. Can we speak about Hannah? We didn't speak about. I got on this big Clydesdale of a Hannah and we went up the mountain and it was absolutely unbelievable. She took my at the time 250 pound keister up that mountain.

[Josh Peck]

That's animal cruelty.

[Ben]

She was, she was loving it. She was a huge gorgeous horse. And then she took me down the mountain and there's nothing scarier than having a horse take you horseback down a mountain, Josh. Yeah, like the fact that she didn't slip. She was perfect. She. All tens. All tens, yeah.

[Josh Peck]

Well, I can't say more, much more than I have a really reputable horse veterinarian in my life. And he jokingly says, like, if you ever need to get ready for like a movie or something, I can give you some of the horse drugs because they're on good stuff.

[Ben]

Oh, yeah.

[Josh Peck]

And I'm like, if you just like, you know, change the weight slightly, like the dosages. Call me Seabiscuit, babe. I mean, you know what I'm saying?

[Ben]

He's just a horse vet. Like, he specializes in horses.

[Josh Peck]

He works at the racetrack.

[Ben]

Interesting. Do you think that, like, I don't know, like, I can't think of horses without thinking of their huge cocks. Like, is there like, say less?

[Josh Peck]

No.

[Ben]

I'm just thinking, like, he, he must. He sees really big cocks all day long, right?

[Josh Peck]

Like, yeah, dude, but that's like me at Equinox. It's like, shout out Equinox in the steam. Yeah, man. I mean, like, I'm not, I'm not purposely looking, but sometimes you can't avoid it. And 95% of the time I feel just fine. I know I make jokes on the podcast, but I'm doing great. But like, but then there are a couple guys where I'm like, that guy would be the king. If we didn't have modern technology, he would own me. Like running and walking around with that thing.

[Ben]

He knows that he can dominate you. Speaking of dominating, Josh, this weekend I went bowl. I'm not bowling. I went to a pool hall with my parents and sister. We went Amsterdam billiards, 11th and 4th. Claudia had an in city bachelorette party. Woo hoo. And we decided to go to the Amsterdam Billiard saw.

[Josh Peck]

Fascinating.

[Ben]

And when I tell you, the king of pool. I had no idea. My mom. Unbelievable, Shark. My dad made his first two shots. He then proceeded to go at least over 200. Like, did not make a ball the final eight games. But shout out. My mom. Absolute pool shark. And I just have to say pool, very underrated. Pool halls, very underrated. And I highly recommend, it's a great team sport. You go there with four people, you want to hang out with them. You're seeing them, you're talking, you're drinking, you're hanging, you're. It's a, it's a fantastic vibe. And when was the last time you played pool?

[Josh Peck]

I. I don't play pool enough, but there was a time in my life where I was pulling it up and I just have to Say anything that's conducive to smoking. I'm talking bowling, I'm talking cards, I'm talking billiards. Great time. You do not have to convince me.

[Ben]

Great time. No, but there was something I. Normally when we have a family outing and we want to play a sport, we're going to go bowling, we're going to go to Chelsea Piers, we're going to rent a lane, we're going to order some snacks, we're going to have a great time. The thing about bowling though is everybody sits and then one person bowls. It's very individual. But pool, you're all surrounding the table, you're all chatting, you're all hanging out. It's fantastic. Absolutely fantastic.

[Josh Peck]

I agree with you. You know, I take my son on the weekends to sober bowling.

[Ben]

Didn't even know that there was non sober bowling. What is sober bowling?

[Josh Peck]

He qualifies. So my buddy, the great Stevie Mac runs a a meeting on the beach Saturday mornings and I don't attend because I'm with the kids. But after, he always invites whomever wants to go to this bowling alley that's not far from my house. So now I get to go and fellowship with my fellow drunk. All Max knows is there's anywhere from two to seven former felons ballin it up. He loves them and they love him.

[Ben]

I mean, who wouldn't love him? And look, bowling, we need bowling. More people need to bowl. That said, if you bring your own ball, you. Josh, I saw people at the pool hall. Not only did they bring their own sticks, they brought their own balls. Who brings their own balls to a pool hall? What's wrong with the balls at the pool hall?

[Josh Peck]

I will tell.

[Ben]

I get it for bowling. Maybe the finger size, the weight. If you're a real pro, I get having your own ball. I think it's weird anyways, but I get it. Bringing your own pool balls. I've never seen anything like this.

[Josh Peck]

First of all, I'll tell you, the great Stevie Mac not only has his own ball and shoes, he has his own little piece of rolling luggage for it. And it's fucking. It is fucking K. Yep. And he has a special shoehorn so he can get his foot in. Stevie's a little big, but I will tell you that the feeling of that shaft in your hands, there is nothing. What?

[Ben]

Oh yeah, a pool shaft.

[Josh Peck]

No. Tell you about Equinox? No. Yes.

[Ben]

Very good, very good.

[Josh Peck]

But when you have a professional like a really like not even, but like $150 pool, you know, like when you're. You have a proper thing. Yeah. Pool stick that you're not like, renting. Just like the one pulling the one off the wall. It's gorgeous.

[Ben]

It is, it is. And like to watch them because they screw together. They unscrew them, they put them in their nice little case. They have expert level chalk. This is, It's. It's a fantastic sport. On bowling, though, I did. I don't know why I was looking up the price of bowling balls. Perhaps I wanted to buy a ball at some point. They're not nearly as expensive as you'd think a bowling ball is. Yeah. You know, I think you could get.

[Josh Peck]

A good one for like 80 bucks, right?

[Ben]

Oh, well, that. I think you can get a ball for 80 bucks. You can get a good one for like 200, which I still think is incredibly cheap. You have that ball forever. You'd assume, like, this is a. It's a lifetime guarantee.

[Josh Peck]

I love all that stuff. Like, my wife is really into tennis, and so for Christmas, I didn't know what to get her, and we didn't want to do anything, like, too wild and crazy. We did, like, we were like, let's just get each other, like, you know, a nice gift, but not like anything over a couple hundred bucks. So I'm like, let me go and get her a badass tennis racket. I went to the Wilson store. I got her the Roger Federer. First of all, the color scheme, they were like, what kind of racket do you want? I'm like, one that isn't neon. I want something matte. I want something that is cute. So anyway, they're like, here's a Roger Federer. I put this thing in my hand. I'm like, this is gorgeous. I'm like, I'm feeling like I'm out there facing Djokovic or some other Serbian man. It's 280 bucks. Like, again, that's a lot of money. But, like, for the best racket in.

[Ben]

The world, top of the line. No, there should be more expensive. There should be more expensive bowling balls. Josh, while I'm thinking about bowling balls, I think, one, we should start a good guys bowling league. And two, if we ever do merch again, that should be our merch bowling shirts. What do you think?

[Josh Peck]

I'm in. And can I say yes and yes. And look at what I'm wearing right now. First of all, this is. You just set me up so beautifully for a transition that I feel really lucky to have a podcast with you. Look what I'm wearing right now. Okay?

[Ben]

That's what I'm here for. Are you wearing bowling shoes? Yes.

[Josh Peck]

I want zero. I am anti traction. Look at this, okay? This is a fire shirt, okay?

[Ben]

This is engine rescue.

[Josh Peck]

This is not one of the cuter ones, but it is a standard fire shirt. If you like me, I'm into nypd. Fdny. You know, Los Angeles Fire Department. I love fire department merch. And with what's been going on in my beautiful city, I say we do a ggfd.

[Ben]

I love gfd.

[Josh Peck]

And we give some of the profits to, you know, the people in it. We'll figure that out later, but I love it.

[Ben]

Yeah, no, we'll give it all. I'm going to pledge a year's salary. Cut that out.

[Josh Peck]

Cut that out, Olivia.

[Ben]

Cut it out.

[Josh Peck]

Cut it out now. Now, we got Samsung. We got Samsung. The Samsung's giving away our money. This is not 2022, okay? We've got Fortune 500.

[Ben]

All right, FD. GG.

[Josh Peck]

Shadow Hero Man.

[Ben]

We love you. FDG. GGFD.

[Josh Peck]

What do we do?

[Ben]

GGF. GGFD. FDGG. I am so in.

[Josh Peck]

Oh, for all first responders, let's do ggpd.

[Ben]

Ggpd. I love it.

[Josh Peck]

Call Dick Wolf, the Good Guys Police Department. We only deal with cases that are kind of not sc.

[Ben]

Call us when you don't need us, but you just want a second opinion.

[Josh Peck]

Yeah, call us. If there's a cat up in the tree, that's a fire department. Well, we'll call them. Call us and we'll call them.

[Ben]

By the way, I have no interest of getting a cat out of the tree now. I have no interest. The cat stays in the tree. Cats. It's fine. The cat's fine. How do you think he got up there? He has nails. I've never understood this. How could the cat get up but not down? Josh. How could the cat get up but not down?

[Josh Peck]

It totally can. Tigers can get up in trees.

[Ben]

Yeah. So maybe the cat wanted to be there. They're like, oh, there's a cat in the tree. Yeah. He literally just spent the last hour climbing it and is, like, chilling. And now you're going to go and rip him out of the tree.

[Josh Peck]

Right. For what could you be. I think it's different in New York City proper, but an outer borough would be okay with it. Could you be a cat owner with an outdoor cat? Like a cat who comes in your house, eats, hangs a little, and then might leave for 36 hours?

[Ben]

There's something about it that feels very Bronx. I'M sure that there are plenty in the Bronx place. And that's why, I'm sorry, I can't do outdoor cats. I can't do indoor cats. I'm just not a. It's just not my thing. It's not my thing. The cats.

[Josh Peck]

Another question I had for you and I think we should film it on my new DJI. Gimbal Osmo 4 camera. Sick. Shout out DJI. It's cool. It's got like a stabilizer in it so we can do like cool vlog style stuff.

[Ben]

Cool. I love dji. I use their little, their little microphones when I'm cooking.

[Josh Peck]

The lav.

[Ben]

DJI is great. Yeah. The magnetic ones, they're fantastic.

[Josh Peck]

Dji. Dji. I think we should do. I follow this account for this girl who walked from the top of Manhattan to Battery park. So went up to like street and then went all the way down. And I think we should do that in one day. It's 60 miles. We'll walk it. We'll have incredible meals throughout.

[Ben]

Are we walking it? If we're walking it, I'm in. If we're running, jogging, I'm out.

[Josh Peck]

No, it's a straw. It's a whole day.

[Ben]

I love it.

[Olivia]

I love it.

[Ben]

I really feel like I could walk forever. I think my stamina for walking is unlimited. Same the second I pick up any bit of pace. I'm limited, but I could walk forever.

[Josh Peck]

Yeah.

[Ben]

I have walked from 1st and 1st to 89th Street. I did that once. I think that's my longest New York.

[Josh Peck]

City walk, which is technically blocks, 90 blocks. So it's like four and a half.

[Ben]

And a half miles.

[Josh Peck]

Almost five miles.

[Ben]

Yeah. It's a good walk. I wasn't tired.

[Josh Peck]

Nice walk.

[Ben]

I wasn't tired. I could have gone again, by the way.

[Josh Peck]

And first of all, let's figure out the meals that we should do on our full day of walking. But what I will say is people call into the show and I think, you know this, Ben. They leave us these speak pipes. They go, hey, I'm going to New York. I'm going to LA. Can you put together. What am I? TripAdvisor?

[Ben]

I know. Are we every day?

[Josh Peck]

Never going to happen. Don't ask us.

[Ben]

No, no, I can't give you a sushi recommendation. I can't because whatever I'm gonna recommend to you, like, I don't know where you're staying. I don't know what you like. Are you a hand roll person? Are you a cut roll person? Are you an omakase? Person. What is your budget again? It's not happening. This isn't happening. No good. No good. That said, Josh on our. We're going from Battery Park. We're going to start in Battery park and we're going to go up. I think we start up and go down.

[Josh Peck]

Agreed? 100%.

[Ben]

Okay. We're going to start up and go down. We're going to end in Battery park at night. So the morning of our walk, Josh, we're going to start out with egg and cheeses on Herobred so that we are full. We don't have that sugar crash later in the day from having a big ass sandwich.

[Josh Peck]

Good.

[Ben]

And we're going to walk up, I think. How do you. How do you feel about this? We stop on 14th and 3rd. First stop is Joe's pizza. Does that feel good to you, or you want to stop or start earlier?

[Josh Peck]

We're on 170th Street.

[Ben]

Oh, we went up. We were up. Okay. No.

[Josh Peck]

Ooh, ooh.

[Ben]

Can we start higher? My favorite restaurant, Golan Heights, 185th in Amsterdam. Josh, this is the schnitzel falafel kebab of your life, love. Oh, so good. Okay, so we're gonna start up there. Herobred. We'll eat you later.

[Josh Peck]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Maybe we'll make. We'll make little, like, hand holders, right? Have you ever had one of these? You get a nice hero tortilla and then you put in a little peanut butter and jelly. You wrap that up. You wrap it up nice. You know what I mean? Then as we're walking, we're popping, we're schmoozing, we're kibitzing, we're popping.

[Ben]

Yes. It's an on the go snack.

[Josh Peck]

This is brought to you by Herobred.

[Ben]

Yes, yes, yes. This kibbitz brought to you by Herobred. We need it for the snacking. So go on hikes. We're snacking on the herobread. We go down. Where are we stopping in the 120s?

[Josh Peck]

We're not stopping anywhere in the 120.

[Ben]

Where are we stopping?

[Josh Peck]

Maybe we go to. Maybe we go to the Costco 116th street for a hot dog. Could you pick him up?

[Ben]

Hot dog in a quick. Hot dog in a quick shift.

[Josh Peck]

We go get a chicken bake. Well, I'm trying to think of. I don't. I mean, look, there are like the famous. There's the famous soul food joint up there.

[Ben]

Yes. Ooh, let's get a reservation at Rao's. Who can Hook that up for us.

[Josh Peck]

What's that? Is that like on 110th?

[Ben]

Something like that, yeah.

[Josh Peck]

So for anyone who doesn't know, Rao's is an invite only Italian restaurant.

[Ben]

Yes. Right. And if we're feeling breakfast y, because it's early, we could also stop at the Seinfeld Diner. That's also up there.

[Josh Peck]

That's true.

[Ben]

We could stop there. Okay. Either one. I feel like Rao's at 9 o'clock in the morning is going to be a tough res. So we're going to go with.

[Josh Peck]

Is it open then?

[Ben]

Because. No, it's closed. I think it's only for dinner.

[Josh Peck]

And I also, I think what's worth a thought is on 72nd between Amsterdam and Central park west is La Dynastia, which is a Asian Cuban fusion. One of these places that you can only find in New York. It's so good. So you're popping beefsteak palomia with a beautiful egg roll, or like ropa vieja with General Chow's chicken. Are you serious?

[Ben]

You had me at ropa. I'm in. I'm ropa in. I'm roped in Ropa me into that baby.

[Josh Peck]

And then we got, you know, and then. And then Bob's your uncle. And we're stopping, we're crossing, we're getting, you know, blue bottle coffees on the way.

[Ben]

Oh, yeah.

[Josh Peck]

Yes. I'm. I'm going to have to.

[Ben]

We're using. We're using my Starbucks credits, Josh. We're using all my credits. I'm going to get free coffees for us the whole time.

[Josh Peck]

Yes.

[Ben]

Okay. You want merch? I'll give you merch. I have enough of those stars. I'll take a ton of everything. I'll get you everything. And folks, comment below. If you have ideas for where you should stop on our journey, let us know. We crowdsource. We're open. Yes, we're open.

[Josh Peck]

And maybe we do, like, hallucinogens the whole time.

[Ben]

Great.

[Josh Peck]

Yes.

[Ben]

Or we do it horseback.

[Josh Peck]

I love it.

[Olivia]

This episode of the Good Guys podcast is brought to you by Robinhood. With Robinhood Gold, you can now enjoy the VIP treatment. Receiving a 3% IRA match on retirement contributions. The privileges of the very privileged are no longer exclusive. With Robinhood gold, your annual IRA contributions are boosted by 3%. Plus, you also get 4% APY on your cash in non retirement accounts. That's over 8x the National Savings average. The perks of the high net worth are now available for any net worth. The new gold standard is here with Robinhood Gold to receive your 3% boost on annual IRA contributions, sign [e-mail] Gold investing involves risk rates subject to change. 3% match requires Robinhood Gold at $5 a month for one year from first match must keep funds in IRA for five years. Go to Robinhood.com boost over 8x. The national average savings account interest rate claim is based on data from the FDIC as of November 18, 2024. Robinhood Financial LLC Member SIPC Gold membership is offered by Robinhood Gold LLC. This episode of the Good Guys podcast is brought to you by Marley Spoon. Starting this year, folks, we all really want to build better eating habits. But between work, life and everything else, planning healthy meals that actually taste good could feel overwhelming. Not everybody is a celebrity chef. That's when I found Marley Spoon, okay? And it's genuinely changed how I cook at home because look, I don't always have the time to go out shop for ingredients.

[Ben]

It's a whole to do, okay? Even celebrities have these problems.

[Olivia]

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[Ben]

That's right.

[Olivia]

Up to 27 free meals with Marley Spoon One last time. That's Marley spoon.com backslash offer backslash good guys for up to 27 free meals. And make sure you use my promo code good guys so they know I sent you.

[Josh Peck]

Should we get to a story?

[Ben]

Yes.

[Josh Peck]

So Lauren Sanchez reacts to Whitney Cummings poking fun at her cheap inauguration look. Whitney Cummings poke fun at Lauren Sanchez polarizing inauguration look. The comedian told her Instagram followers that she's not going to hate on the 55 year old for wearing a white Alexander McQueen pantsuit and a peekaboo lace bra. She is a businesswoman. Her decisions have gotten her this far. Cummings, 42, continued. I respect her judgment. And then she kind of basically just. She kind of like lightly made fun. She blamed the bra. She was like, it's probably $1,000 bra, but white lace inherently sometimes doesn't look the classiest. And so she certainly roasted her. She said it's the kind of thing that looks cute in a mirror, but then in a photo, no bueno. She said, it's giving. Bachelor in paradise meets love is blind energy.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Josh Peck]

But I will say that Lauren Sanchez, who's a badass, liked it. And I don't know if she commented, but oh, oh, and uploaded a heart emoji.

[Ben]

If I'm Lauren Sanchez, I don't give two shits.

[Josh Peck]

Totally.

[Ben]

I'm. I'm so rich. And all that I care about is if daddy Jeff cares. And I think daddy Jeff loved it. I think he looked at her and said, honey, you look fabulous, by the way. I can't wait. And I can't wait to go home. Like, that's probably what he was saying. So each their own. You see, John Fetterman, he showed up.

[Josh Peck]

In sweats and basketball shorts. The great senator from Pennsylvania came to the inauguration in a hoodie and basket shorts.

[Ben]

Legends like, I'm kind of like, I'm kind of like over the whole, like, I agree that it's. It's nice to look very presentable. And if I went, I would like to be wearing like a nice suit, whatever, but each their own. I don't know. I saw people roasting her. I was just like, the funniest part about it to me was that Zuckerberg meme that went around where he's clearly taken a peek at. Peek at her hoo hahs and the guy. And the guy behind him. Did you see that meme where there's a guy that's just like his jaws on the floor. Um, but, yeah, I don't know. I don't know. I thought she looked great.

[Josh Peck]

I agree. I thought it looked like watching Zuckerberg, Bezos, Elon up there, the president of Google. It looked like an esports all star team, like.

[Ben]

Sonny.

[Josh Peck]

It was pretty. It was pretty great.

[Ben]

It's so funny.

[Josh Peck]

Well, did you also see that? That it is a tradition that Trump reveals inspirational message. Biden left the Oval Office. Did you see this?

[Ben]

No.

[Josh Peck]

So as Trump was sitting behind the famous desk of the Oval Office, one of the reporters said, did President Biden leave you a letter? Which I guess every outgoing president writes the future president a letter and leaves it in a drawer in the desk. And Trump was like, oh, I'm not sure. Let me check. And it was there and it was titled 247. And then he was like, maybe I'll read it on camera. Actually, I'll. I'll read it privately and then I'll let you know what it says. So what would be in your letter to the incoming president?

[Ben]

Good luck. I left the country in as good a shape as I could have for you. Please don't fuck up what I've done over the last four years. But I'm rooting for you. Yeah, that's what I would write. Please don't draw back everything I've done. That must be so frustrating. But, yeah, like, that's what I would write. What would you write?

[Josh Peck]

I would say, don't trust anyone. Aliens are real, real, real, real, real. JFK was an inside job. You're fucked. No, I don't know. We don't know. We don't know.

[Ben]

Oh, we don't know. Oh, ok. I'm sure it was something like that or like just like a smiley face or something weird. I don't know. Lol. Good luck.

[Josh Peck]

Yeah, I would just write it like. Or you just write like, do you like me? Yes. No, maybe keep it real. I'm saying I would leave one of those little fortune tellers so you can, like, make yourself like, 7,000, 842.

[Ben]

Oh, my God.

[Josh Peck]

Oh, man. What? What a time. All right, and then the last one. Surgeon and father of three performs vasectomy on himself as a gift for his wife. I'm really brave.

[Ben]

What is wrong with people?

[Josh Peck]

Well, the plastic surgeon Chen Winong in Taiwan made men of the world wince after giving himself a vasectomy on camera. It was a strange feeling to touch and suture my own Urethra declared the chop doc in the AI translated caption of the nail biting clip which he uploaded to the platform for educational purposes.

[Ben]

Whoa. What platform?

[Josh Peck]

IG.

[Ben]

Oh, my God. What the fuck?

[Josh Peck]

Wow.

[Ben]

Why? Why? Like, I don't even. I don't even get it. Like, maybe. Is he broke?

[Josh Peck]

He's a doctor.

[Ben]

I know, but you need a second opinion, for sure. You need. You need other eyes. That's crazy to me. Very scary. And so he was numb. I guess he gave himself local in his johnson and then he went down there and just.

[Josh Peck]

I mean, my friends who have had it done before all say it's easy peasy. Even the angles. You need a mirror there. And like, you know, his taint wasn't in great shape. You know what I'm saying? This is not the kind of guy who's like, let me do some pre grooming.

[Ben]

No, no, no. Definitely not. Because he doesn't have to, right? It's just him.

[Josh Peck]

That's. That's. Boy O boy.

[Ben]

When was the last time you shaved your nether regions?

[Josh Peck]

I'm so glad you asked. This is a great segment. I need to like, I. Every six to eight weeks, I go. I'm in the shower and I go, it's time. And then.

[Ben]

And you go. And you shave it off completely.

[Josh Peck]

I go bare.

[Ben]

Yeah. See, that's a skinny man move, Josh. It's a skinny man move. You can't go bare unless you can bear the sight of it. So I'm like, once every couple of months, just trim the hedges.

[Josh Peck]

But what about, like the other region? Are you leaving that? Like. You're not touching your.

[Ben]

The grundle.

[Josh Peck]

I don't even know what that is.

[Ben]

The under sack.

[Josh Peck]

Yeah, sure. The taint.

[Ben]

I don't touch it. I just. Maybe I should. I don't know. Why did I lead us here?

[Josh Peck]

I do want to get fully waxed one day. Because I just want to know what it's like.

[Ben]

Totally. Just to be totally clean.

[Josh Peck]

Yes.

[Ben]

What about. How do you feel about anal bleaching down to clown?

[Josh Peck]

Call Joey Kamassa. I'll let him do it for me. You kidding me? What a gift. Oh, that's what we should do.

[Ben]

On our walk downtown. Joey will tell us the. The side street that we can get.

[Josh Peck]

It on the side. Maybe we do it before the walk and we see how quickly we become inflamed.

[Ben]

Instant.

[Josh Peck]

Do you know that something not so similar happened to me when so I was dating Paige? We'd only been together like six months. Call it. I had never been on vacation. I'm 26 years old. Like, on a proper vacation. My mom and I had been to Atlantic City. We'd driven down to Florida before, but we lived in Florida. But I'd never been to, like, Cancun or the Bahamas or Hawaii. Like, the way kids I knew grew up would go away. So I was 26. I was finally with a girl who I, like, really loved and I wanted to, like, go away with. And I got a check, an ice age residual check. And I'm like. I was like, paige, we're going to Hawaii. So we planned the trip and before we leave, I noticed that I have. I'm not like the craziest hairy guy at all. Like, I don't really have, like chest or shoulder hair or anything like that, but I noticed I had, like a few small patches of back hair. So I'm like, I'm getting that wax off. So I go to this place, they do the waxing. Very nice. No big deal. And she didn't tell me, you should probably go home and shower and just chill out for the rest of the day. Because I just wax you and it opens up your pores and your skin might react. I went to the gym after I went to 24 Hour Fitness. After I did a chest day after. Okay, that means I'm laying on. On the bench.

[Ben]

Yes.

[Josh Peck]

At 24 Hour Fitness. Throwing up, you know, 50s minimum. I get such a infection in my back when I tell you folliculitis like you have never seen before. I literally. Because it really started to happen as we got home. Like, it took days to sort of mature. I thought I had been attacked by sea lice in the waters of Wailea. I said, I've clearly been attacked by a sea creature. And then I went to the doctor and he's like, nah, dog. He's like, you have fucked your shit up. And I had to go on like a 10 day antibiotic.

[Ben]

Said sea creature, Josh. So I just have to set the record straight. I started sea moss gel. And after day two, I'm off it. This is a hoax. This is a hoax. I felt like I was putting cum in my mouth. It's like some joke, ok? It's just literally the exact consistency of semen. You're putting it in your mouth.

[Josh Peck]

How do you know? What do you have to reference it to?

[Ben]

I have my own semen.

[Josh Peck]

Yeah.

[Ben]

I have Equinox.

[Josh Peck]

I'm gonna lose my free membership after this app. I know it.

[Ben]

And I'm out. I just. I just. It's. It's not for me. I didn't see any of the benefits. I actually, I felt worse. I felt worse. Ok. So I'm not saying that CMOS is for no one. I'm just saying that sea moss is not for me. That's all.

[Josh Peck]

But I also questioned when I saw on your review of it that like, for my friends who've done sea moss, they tend to get it from people who are from the islands and.

[Ben]

Yes.

[Josh Peck]

And it's like very. What's it called, Olivia? How do you pronounce it? Apothecary.

[Hugo Lord]

Apothecary. Yes.

[Josh Peck]

Thank you so much.

[Ben]

So you didn't like that I went with a mainstream brand. This is.

[Josh Peck]

Yeah, you were like, you got like a mango flavored one. Like, what is happening here? You're like, oh, yes. CMOS by Ring Pop. You know, but it is. It was a. I got a fun dip CMOS Collab.

[Ben]

It was 4.9 stars. Irish witchcraft or Irish witch. Something with which. And it was supposed to be top of the line, no added sugars. It wasn't for me, so no way. I wouldn't recommend it. I wouldn't recommend it.

[Josh Peck]

Should we get you a speak pipe?

[Ben]

Yeah, let's do a speak pipe.

[Josh Peck]

Okay. If you want to leave us a message, go to speakpipe.com goodguys and we will give you advice. Keep it interesting. We don't want to hear your what are you nuts? Is they usually stink. Keep it brief. Brevity is key. Here's one from I don't know.

[Caller 1]

Hey, Josh and Ben. Love you guys. Huge. I want to get y'all takes on Southern accents. So I grew up in Alabama, but now I live in North Carolina and I have my first big girl job. And a lot of people I work with are from, like, New York and New Jersey. And I never really thought about having a southern accent until I started working with them because sometimes people will, like, in a nice way, like, make fun of me for the way I talk. So I just want to know what y'all thought. Like, do you think people from the south sound dumb or, like, awesome or crazy or. I don't know. I just want to know what y'all thought. And should I start, like, trying to train myself to not have too much of a Southern accent? And should I start trying to, like, talk more professionally at work? Like, do I. Do I sound crazy? Is basically what I'm trying to ask. Okay, love you guys. Bye.

[Ben]

Love you. Don't change. Dumb people sound dumb. Accents don't make them dumb. Ok, like that, like that's preposterous. To me, these New Yorkers sound like a bunch of schmucks. Ok, Your accent is fantastic. I love it. It always. Southern accents in general make me feel very warm, cozy, friendly. I think it's fantastic, Josh.

[Josh Peck]

I love them. And the only accent I don't really like are New Jersey. New York accents.

[Ben]

Ok.

[Josh Peck]

You know what I'm saying, though?

[Ben]

Like, yeah, I do.

[Josh Peck]

Southern accents are, like, romantic and dreamy. Like, no one's ever like, fudge me. Like, you're from Trenton, you know, like, totally.

[Ben]

No, but I mean, our. Our accents are for sure the worst. For sure.

[Josh Peck]

The truth is you don't really have one in the way that I don't really have one. I mean, yeah, I've lived in L. A for 20 plus years, but. But, like, when you get to, like, deep parts of Brooklyn, Long island, you know, certain parts of New Jersey, it's insufferable.

[Ben]

They're thick. They're very thick. Laid on heavy. And honestly, I'm jealous that I didn't grow up saying, y'all, I love y'all. Oh, yeah.

[Josh Peck]

Imagine.

[Ben]

Y'all is good. You all is too much.

[Josh Peck]

Y'all, y'all, y'all queen. One more.

[Caller 2]

Hi, good guys. Okay, so I need you to tell me who's nuts here, guys or girls? So a couple years ago, my husband and I dryer was on its way out, but it was still working, and I needed to use it because I'm a physician and my scrubs needed to be washed.

[Ben]

So, thank you.

[Caller 2]

The guy comes, replaces the dryer, and then conveniently that day, my husband takes off to Las Vegas for a bachelor party. I come home and I'm like, hey, where are all of the clothes and scrubs that were in the dryer? My husband goes, what are you talking about? I'm like, you didn't check the dryer? No, he didn't check the dryer. The guy that took the dryer didn't check it, didn't realize it was heavier. So all of my scrubs, gone. The nuts part is that this has been talked about for at least once a week by our entire friend group. It was brought up at every major event of our lives. Our good friends, their dryer was on their way out, and my girlfriend did a load of wash. And poof. Everything gone again. So are we nuts, the girls, for doing the wash in a dryer that still works but needs to be replaced? Or are the guys nuts because they're not checking and they're just aimlessly giving away all of our stuff for free. Let me know.

[Ben]

Obviously, the guy's nuts. You don't check the dryer to see if there's anything in it. That's like me throwing away a cabinet and not checking if there's any dishes in it. Or throwing away a dresser and not checking if there's any clothes. Nuts. He's nuts. It's not her fault, totally.

[Josh Peck]

But that is so something I would do.

[Ben]

I'm sure there was no malicious intent, but he's nuts.

[Josh Peck]

Should we get terrible? What are you nuts?

[Ben]

We should.

[Josh Peck]

Our what are you nuts? Moment of the week are gripes with people, places and things. These are just. Yeah, they're the things sticking in our craw, big or small. I'll start. The other day I was getting breakfast with funny enough, and you'll find this our wonderful pediatrician who we've become friends with her and her husband. She's such a lovely person. And so it was me, my wife, my sister in law and the pediatrician and her husband. So there was five of us and a kid and a shy six in total. So we're waiting this wonderful diner near our house, like, delicious breakfast spot. But we're waiting and we're waiting and it's like, actually. And they're like, oh, it's 15 minutes, shouldn't be bad, but we're seeing all these people who are coming in after us, are going in, going in, going in. So, you know, 20, 25 minutes in, I start going like, maybe they don't, you know, I start thinking like, am I, am I not Josh Peck anymore? Like, why am I waiting? So I go to the hostess and she goes, I'm sorry, there's only two tables in the whole place for six. And both of the tables have paid their check, but they're just hanging out. What are you nuts? This is when you go up to the table and I believe you, just say nicely, like, I'm sorry. You know, we have people waiting for this table. These people have eaten, they've schmoozed, they've paid, they've been here an hour plus get up. What are you nuts? But it's on the restaurant if you're a host at that restaurant. I once was schmoozing hanging out at this restaurant and it was like, I think it was @ Craig's in LA, right? So it was like, hard to get a table. I will never forget. We're chatting after we've had, we've had our dessert, the bill's been paid, the waiter would come over every three to five minutes and remove one thing from the table, like a packet of Sweet and Low. And then he would just look at us like this and just keep walking. By the third time, there was no Sweet and Low left. And I was like, let's get the heck out of here. This guy wants us out. Out, Out. What are you, nuts?

[Ben]

And this was breakfast, right?

[Josh Peck]

Yes, Josh.

[Ben]

There's no schmoozing after the check has come.

[Josh Peck]

And breakfast, 100%.

[Ben]

This, I agree with you. It's totally on the establishment. But it's also on these imbeciles. Get the fuck up. Get up.

[Josh Peck]

Get up.

[Ben]

You paid your bill. You don't have anything to do that day. Leave at least dinner. You are going home to go to sleep. Right? So I get that. Maybe you had a cocktail at Craig's. You're schmoozing. You didn't have a cocktail at breakfast. At least I hope not. Who knows? Maybe you did. Maybe you crushed a couple of Bloody Marys. I have no idea. Nuts. Absolutely nuts. My. What are you, nuts? Josh, is. We went to this pool hall, right? I was talking about me, my parents, my sister, my mom wanted something to drink, so she said, I want a club soda. Said, no problem. I went up to the bar. I ordered her a club soda. She handed me the bill. $4.50. I thought it was very expensive for a club soda, but no problem. Whatever. I gave her a 50. That's what I had. She comes back, Josh. She doesn't say anything to me. Two fives, 34 ones. Sure, 34 $1 bills and two fives. What are you, nuts? Just tell me. You can't break it. Tell me. Tell me that you don't have larger bills. I'll pay with a credit card. I said, oh, no, no, no, don't worry about it. She's like, oh, I'm sorry. I already put the 50 away. Do you understand the inconvenience of having 30 plus $1 bills in your wallet? You can't close it. That money might as well not exist. That's just anybody that you see. You want a one? You want a one? You want a One?

[Olivia]

I lost.

[Ben]

I paid $50 for that. That club soda. I might as well have paid 50.

[Josh Peck]

Totally. What are you, nuts?

[Ben]

Nuts? Folks, it's been fun. This episode's five stars. This episode's five stars. Otherwise, what are you? Nuts? Listen to us on Apple, Spotify, wherever you get your podcasts. Watch us on YouTube, share our clips. You're liking our YouTube shorts. I see you're liking them.

[Olivia]

Eight minutes.

[Ben]

That's your attention span. What are you, nuts? Watch the whole damn video. Share our clips. Instagram and TikTok. Mondays and Wednesdays, new episodes. We will see you next time. Great.

[Josh Peck]

Gorgeous.

[Ben]

Let's. One minute. Say Wednesday. Ben, can you say that?

[Josh Peck]

What?

[Ben]

Said Wednesday? I said Wednesday.

[Hugo Lord]

I've never heard you say Wednesday.

[Ben]

Leave this money.

[Josh Peck]

Leave this all in.

[Ben]

Yeah, I get. Just leave it Mondays and Wednesdays.

[Caller 2]

Perfect.

[Josh Peck]

That's really funny. Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.