Two Dads and a Dream

Summary

Podcast Summary: Good Guys – "Two Dads and a Dream"

Episode Overview In the June 16, 2025 episode of the "Good Guys" podcast hosted by Josh Peck and Ben Soffer, titled "Two Dads and a Dream," the hosts delve into a variety of engaging topics ranging from unusual news stories to personal anecdotes and listener questions. This episode blends humor with insightful discussions, offering listeners a rich and entertaining experience.

---

1. Unusual News Stories

Threesome with a Ghost

The episode kicks off with Ben introducing a bizarre story from the New York Post about a UK widow who claims to have had a threesome with a bisexual woman and the ghost of her late husband. Ben humorously refers to this incident as "spiritual cucking," highlighting the absurdity of the situation.

• Ben: "It's a spiritual cucking." [42:48]

Josh reflects on the concept, noting the blend of physical and spiritual elements, and both hosts express skepticism about the literal existence of ghosts.

Discussion on Micro Penises

The conversation shifts to a more personal and humorous topic as Josh and Ben discuss micro penises, sharing jokes and anecdotes about friends and acquaintances.

• Josh: "A penis the size of a Tootsie Roll." [43:25]
• Ben: "It's like an elevator button." [43:38]

Their lighthearted banter provides comic relief while addressing a sensitive subject with humor.

---

2. Friendship Dynamics

Down to Clown

Josh and Ben emphasize the importance of having friends who are always ready to engage and support without judgment. They express appreciation for friends like Nick Antonio, who are "down to clown" and willing to participate in spontaneous fun.

• Ben: "Nick Antonio is one of my best friends and one of the funniest people I know." [44:12]

Invitation Etiquette

The hosts discuss the frustration of friends who respond to invitations with questions like "Who else is going?" Josh humorously points out the annoyance by saying:

• Josh: "If I invite you somewhere and you ask me who else is going? You're uninvited." [44:30]

They also joke about family members intruding on personal spaces, adding to the comedic tone of the conversation.

---

3. Modern Cheating and Social Media

OnlyFans and Relationship Trust

Ben brings up a relevant issue by discussing how subscribing to a porn star's OnlyFans account is increasingly viewed as a form of cheating among Australians. Olivia, presumably a co-host or guest, adds her perspective on why paying for content on platforms like OnlyFans feels different compared to free online pornography.

• Ben: "It's like cheating. ... it's akin to strain from their relationship." [44:51]
• Olivia: "Paying for it feels really gross to me." [45:23]

Josh reflects on generational differences in accessing porn, noting that while platforms like Pornhub have been accessible for years, OnlyFans introduces a more personal interaction that can impact relationships.

• Josh: "It was a spiritual threesome. But there's no actual threesome." [42:48]
• Olivia: "There's more of a conversation around it now." [47:17]

The discussion highlights the evolving perceptions of fidelity and trust in the age of social media and subscription-based content.

---

4. Celebrity News

Taylor Swift's Subpoena

Ben mentions a surprising development involving Taylor Swift, who has been subpoenaed as a witness in the Justin Baldoni case. He speculates on the implications of such a high-profile celebrity being involved in legal proceedings and the potential backlash from her fanbase.

• Ben: "Taylor Swift's being dragged further into the Justin Baldoni beef." [49:01]
• Josh: "I wouldn't want a subpoena." [49:43]

The hosts express their bewilderment at the situation, underscoring the intersection of fame and the legal system.

---

5. Listener Q&A: "Moment of the Week"

Handling a Creepy Relative

An anonymous listener reaches out about her husband's uncle, who exhibits inappropriate behavior, including making obscene comments and sending unsolicited catalogs. The listener seeks advice on whether to ban the uncle from family events entirely.

• Anonymous Caller: "Should I just make a blanket statement of he is not allowed, don't ever come back?" [50:23]

Josh and Ben respond empathetically, advising the listener to set clear boundaries and cut off contact to protect her and her family from the uncle's disturbing behavior.

• Josh: "This is cops-worthy. If he's that creepy, go creep." [52:45]
• Ben: "Tell him, dog. Nah, you're talking that crazy shit again." [52:19]

Checking in Post-Breakup

Another listener, Sarah, asks about reaching out to an ex-boyfriend to ensure he's okay after a breakup, without wanting to give false hope of rekindling the relationship.

• Sarah: "I want to make sure he's doing okay, but I don't want to overstep..." [53:25]

Josh and Ben caution against reaching out, explaining that it may inadvertently give the ex-boyfriend false hope and hinder his ability to move on.

• Josh: "You're giving him false hope." [54:57]
• Ben: "She clearly wants to hook up with you again." [54:39]

The hosts emphasize the importance of clear separation post-breakup to facilitate emotional healing.

---

6. Comedy Bits: "What Are You Nuts?"

Towards the end of the episode, Josh and Ben engage in a comedic segment where they humorously question everyday behaviors they find irrational or silly.

Unnecessary Sampling at Costco

Ben criticizes the practice of sampling familiar products like Oreos at Costco, deeming it unnecessary.

• Ben: "Are you nuts? I don't need to sample an Oreo." [57:05]
• Josh: "That's nuts." [57:44]

Miscellaneous Annoyances

They continue with humorous critiques of other minor nuisances, such as the insistence on having samples of well-known products and the superstition surrounding the number 13 in apartment buildings.

• Josh: "If you live on 13 and you're gonna die." [57:11]
• Ben: "That's nuts." [58:27]

The segment adds a light-hearted conclusion to the episode, highlighting their camaraderie and shared sense of humor.

---

7. Closing Remarks

In their final moments, Josh and Ben encourage listeners to rate the podcast five stars and engage with their content across various platforms like YouTube and Instagram. They reiterate the humorous theme of the episode with repetitive chanting of "What are you nuts?" to emphasize their playful connection with the audience.

---

Key Takeaways

• Navigating Modern Relationships: The hosts explore how subscription-based content like OnlyFans impacts trust and fidelity in relationships, reflecting broader societal shifts.

• Maintaining Healthy Boundaries: Through listener questions, Josh and Ben provide thoughtful advice on setting boundaries with problematic individuals and managing post-breakup dynamics.

• Humor and Friendship Dynamics: The episode underscores the importance of humor and genuine friendship, highlighting how shared laughter strengthens bonds.

• Celebrity Influence and Legalities: The unexpected involvement of a high-profile celebrity in legal matters serves as a commentary on the intersection of fame and personal accountability.

Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Ben: "It's a spiritual cucking." [42:48]
• Josh: "A penis the size of a Tootsie Roll." [43:25]
• Ben: "Nick Antonio is one of my best friends and one of the funniest people I know." [44:12]
• Josh: "If I invite you somewhere and you ask me who else is going? You're uninvited." [44:30]
• Ben: "It's like cheating. ... it's akin to strain from their relationship." [44:51]
• Olivia: "There's more of a conversation around it now." [47:17]
• Ben: "Taylor Swift's being dragged further into the Justin Baldoni beef." [49:01]
• Josh: "You're giving him false hope." [54:57]
• Josh: "This is cops-worthy. If he's that creepy, go creep." [52:45]
• Ben: "Tell him, dog. Nah, you're talking that crazy shit again." [52:19]
• Josh: "That's nuts." [57:44]
• Ben: "That's nuts." [58:27]

---

Conclusion The "Two Dads and a Dream" episode of the "Good Guys" podcast offers a blend of humor, personal insights, and relevant discussions on contemporary issues. Through their dynamic interaction, Josh Peck and Ben Soffer provide listeners with both entertainment and thoughtful perspectives on navigating modern life and relationships.

Transcript

[Ben]

The following podcast is a dear media production.

[Josh]

Two Jews, both big and tall.

[Ben]

No subject too small for the good guys. A mother's dream premium podcast team.

[Josh]

Make it your weekly routine.

[Ben]

It's a good guys.

[Josh]

And if you don't give us five stars.

[Ben]

What are you nuts?

[Josh]

What are you nuts? Yeah, we're the good guys.

[Ben]

They're not the great guys.

[Josh]

We're just the good of the good of the good guys.

[Ben]

Do, do, do Ben and Josh, Josh.

[Josh]

Josh Doo doo, doo Ben and Josh.

[Ben]

Ooh, Ben and Josh.

[Josh]

I can do the ooo. Ben and Josh.

[Ben]

This is Ben and Josh and they're doing a pod.

[Josh]

You threw me off. I was ready for Benny and Joshi back on the pod. But I like this. I like this. Ben and Josh.

[Ben]

Can you imagine if you were the bass of a five part harmony and just had. And had micro phallus?

[Josh]

No, I can't get. Could you imagine if your voice was.

[Ben]

Like this and you had a half incher?

[Josh]

I can't get that. This is how low I can get. I can't get that low, man, but I can get that high. What does that say about me as a man?

[Ben]

Here's the thing. My wife calls it actor voice in that sometimes when I have auditions and stuff, for some reason things will lower down here, but I think my voice is high and like this when I'm like really people pleasing and trying and throwing some razzle dazzle, kid, kid, actor vibes. But like, if I'm actually relaxed, it's kind of, you know, here when I'm not trying.

[Josh]

That's interesting. You're saying that I'm trying when I'm down here.

[Ben]

I think we tend up a little.

[Josh]

This is me not trying. It's deeper. I'm not. I'm not trying at all.

[Ben]

It's steeper. That's high teeper.

[Josh]

I'm not.

[Ben]

I'm not trying in tests right now.

[Josh]

I'm not trying at all. What? I've never tried less than I am right now.

[Ben]

I would have thought you just got injected in a Bally's locker room with just a syringe full of deca.

[Josh]

It did right in my keister. Is there anything more? Have you ever been to a cvs? I've only done this in Los Angeles. By the way, they only seem to do this in la. You go to a random corner store and they have you take off your pants and throw the vitamin B right in your keister. No, you've never had that.

[Ben]

What random corner store? Say more.

[Josh]

I don't remember where me and Claudia went, I think it was. This was probably, like two years ago. Vitamin B shots were all the rave. I guess they still are, but, like, they were really hot there. And like, we went to this place. They're like, we give out vitamin B shots, and they asked me to pull down my. My pants. I obviously covered my schmack, and they stabbed me right in the ass. I just feel like it's not normal. I don't know.

[Ben]

Yeah, I mean, what's big now are NAD infusions, which I've never actually officially done, but I really want to.

[Josh]

What is that? Tell me more.

[Ben]

I don't know what the acronym stands for exactly, except for something to the effect of like, nicotinamide, something, something. But basically what it's supposed to do is restore the telomeres in your brain, like the signalers, or it's part of. There's neurons. We're talking synapses. But basically what it helps to do is renew and revitalize relayers in your brain that sends messages around. So what tends to degrade or what they think? I don't think there's, like, any hard. Hard science. Is that cognitive disease, like Parkinson's, like Alzheimer's, These things are because of erosion or degrading of these telomere sites. So it's supposed to make you feel. Feel younger, look younger, sharper, better. They call it the fountain of youth. And all of, like, the big optimization doctors that I follow and, like, are big proponents.

[Josh]

I'm in. How do I do that? It sounds a lot like what I have now taken for a week straight. Josh. Which is lion's mane. Doesn't lion's mane also help with the connectivity in the brain?

[Ben]

I think one is more actual restorative, and one is more of like a. A band aid. So lion's mane is great when you take it, but as soon as it's out of your body, I don't think it's doing anything for you. But I take it. I. You know, I love alpha brain. I love on it. I love a nootropic.

[Josh]

Yeah, yeah, okay. All right. Nad. I will look into it. Josh, I will look into this. Nad.

[Ben]

If you. If there's any kind. Concierge. Not concierge, but like beauty spa, health spa, med spa types, which I'm sure there's a million around you on Fifth Avenue.

[Josh]

Please.

[Ben]

They'll just shoot it right in. They'll either give you an injection or the real way to get it isn't a drip. But the problem is, is that it takes about two hours, which is fine. If you bring a laptop, you could do work and. Or watch something. But there's a nausea factor to it, which scares me because I hate a sour stomach.

[Josh]

No, terrible. I'm now thinking there was a period of time, Josh, I was getting IVs left and right. I loved them. I would have, like, a. I don't know, a night out on the town. I'd wake up in the morning, text the person, IV would come to my house. It's just like. That is crazy talk. Like, now, I wouldn't. I don't know why I wouldn't do that now. Back then, it seemed completely normal just to get an IV in my house. I don't need an iv. Well, I'll drink some water. I understand. A drip with things in it. But I was just getting, like, a standard iv, just saline. It was really. Just. Maybe there was some other. Like some glutathione or gluta. Whatever. Yeah, some vitamin B's and D's and all that stuff. But, like, I. I didn't need it. I was doing it like. Like once a week. You don't need it that frequently.

[Ben]

Well, you were probably getting it because you were partying way more than you do. Or just at least drinking way more than you do now.

[Josh]

Drinking way more than I do now. For sure. I would feel awful, and I would get it, and it would make me feel like a million bucks.

[Ben]

It is the cheat code to a hangover, for sure.

[Josh]

Absolutely.

[Ben]

If you get a bag full of saline Myers cocktail in there with a little bit of glutathione for antioxidant and some paracetamol, some acetaminophen. So they put in some. That man in the pit.

[Josh]

Put him in the pit, dude.

[Ben]

I'd crush it. The reason when you feel drunk is because your body doesn't have enough water to run its crib cycles. And so. I'm sorry, that's why you feel hungover. And so basically what you're doing is you're flushing the body with everything that it's sort of been begging for. So. So, yeah, I would do it, too.

[Josh]

But when you get these at home. Here's the problem, Josh. These are the nurses that. I don't know. I don't know if they can't work at a hospital. I don't know what they're doing in my house. But they're terrible, typically terrible at finding the blood vessel. They're terrible. They always. I get like three or four stabs. I don't know about you. I have bad veins. I've always had bad veins. Like, if you come looking for my veins, they're going to be hard to find. I don't know why. Once you get them, no problem. But I would get stabbed frequently. It was no good.

[Ben]

But have you ever been this thin? Because I used to be. That was when. That's the same as a seatbelt extender. When they go, we're going to have to draw from your hand.

[Josh]

I'd be like, yes, they would draw from my hand. Oh, you're saying that's just because I was morbidly obese?

[Ben]

Yeah, because you were a fat bastard.

[Josh]

So they couldn't find my veins through all of my triglycerides. That's what you're saying. You are so hurtful.

[Ben]

When you go in to go get. When you go into quest labs and they're like, get out the ultrasound, dude. That's my life, bro. They. So, like, my mom used to always say, like, you're going to have to do it in his hand. I'd be like, ma, yeah, they would do it.

[Josh]

I don't need your help. I would always get it in my hand. Always. Always. No matter what. I never really thought about it. No, I'm still looking. I just don't have very good veins. They're just not. I don't. Maybe I'm still too fat. I'm also. But I was going to say I'm here talking about how I'm skinny. I'm still a little too fat.

[Ben]

You are skinny and your arms are thin. Here, take. Take your hand and grip your bicep with whichever. Whichever. Grip it really tight. And now ball your hand in a fist.

[Josh]

Yep.

[Ben]

For, like. Just hold it for 10 seconds.

[Josh]

I see. And then I have one. Go tight.

[Ben]

And now take your left hand and palpitate. Go like that. Palpitate the vein. Like. No, no, no. Right. Right where you're on the other side of your elbow. On the opposite side. Yeah, right here. And it should make your vein come to the surface. You notice it. Straight. Straighten your arm. Straight.

[Josh]

This is as straight as it goes.

[Ben]

I'd be such a terrible phlebotomist.

[Josh]

No, I have. I have two veins. I have.

[Ben]

Straighten your arm, fatty.

[Josh]

I still have, by the way. This is as straight as I have. I have. I found my vein. I broke my arm. No, but I have two. Okay. Yeah, there's two right here. Ooh, looking sexy veins.

[Ben]

Happy to help.

[Josh]

Such hot veins.

[Ben]

Veins are hot. Vascularity's hot. Olivia, am I right?

[Josh]

It's hot.

[Olivia]

Yeah, it's great.

[Josh]

Big veins are in, little veins are out.

[Ben]

Varicose veins are in. So good they're hot.

[Josh]

This episode of the Good Guys podcast is brought to you by our friends at Prolon. Full disclosure, I've never been very good about changing up my health routine. You guys know I've tried everything. Whenever I say I want to lose weight or I want to be healthier, nothing historically has really stuck. That's when I turn to Prolon's five day fasting mimicking diet program. Because after five days, I feel lighter, more energized and back on track. It's like a hard reset. Now they've upped their game with Next gen, packing the same science backed benefits into a cleaner, more convenient and tastier format. Thank God. Pro Lawn, folks, is a plant based nutrition program featuring soups, snacks and beverages designed to nourish the body while keeping it in a fasting state, triggering cellular rejuvenation and renewal. You heard that right. You're eating while your body thinks you're fasting. It's genius. NextGen builds on the original Prolon with 100% organic soups and teas, a richer taste and ready to eat meals. Developed over decades at USC's Longevity Institute and backed by top U.S. medical centers, Prolon has been shown to support biological age reduction, metabolic health, skin appearance, fat loss and energy. Is that something you might be interested in? Well, it was for me. I did it. I loved it. I've never felt better. Five days, I was like, holy crap, I feel amazing. My body thought I was fasting. My body loves when I fast. That's why I try. I do my best. I do my best not to eat before 12. Okay, Josh, he eats like from one to four. I've never seen. He doesn't eat or he does eat, but it's crazy. He's always in a fasting state. So that's why he also loves Prolon. So folks, to help you jumpstart a plan that delivers real results, Prolon is offering Good Guys listeners an exclusive chance to be among the first to try next gen with 15% off site wide plus a $40 bonus gift. When you subscribe to their five day program, just visit prolonlife.comgoodguys that's P R-O-L-O-N-L-I F E.comgoodguys to claim your 15% discount and your bonus gift. Prolonlife.comgoodguys hi, I'm Pia Barangini, the creative.

[Pia]

Director of LPA, an entrepreneur, a wife and a dog mom based in Los Angeles. This is my new podcast, Everything is the Best, where we basically ask interesting people, how did you go from zero to yacht? I'm always curious how the hell people became successful. And I figured you would be to get on the Internet with me. Let's laugh, let's cry, let's overshare, and let's get inspired to live our best lives. Check out new episodes every Wednesday. It's all for you, baby. Thanks for listening. Love you. Mean it.

[Ben]

Yeah. It's interesting how I remember I was doing this movie, this cold weather western in Romania, and it was at such a funny time in my life. Basically, this director, nice enough guy, but he was like, I don't think you're gonna know this reference. Have you ever seen the movie Rushmore?

[Josh]

No.

[Ben]

You've seen Olivia?

[Josh]

Yes. Is it about our forefathers?

[Ben]

You think it's one of the greatest movies ever. You must see it. It's with Jason Schwartzman and it's Wes Anderson's second movie. So it was like really the movie that put him on the scene. It's Jason Schwarzman and Bill Murray and basically he plays like a young kid at a prep school who's like a director and. But he's obsessive, right? So he's like one of those. Basically. One of his favorite. One of the famous lines from it is like, do not fuck with my show. Like, don't fuck with my movie. And so we're dealing with a director like this on this Romanian cold weather western. And it's a $2 million movie, which in Romania at the time was the equivalent to having almost $7 million. So we had a little bit of scratch and we're shooting and it's negative 50 degrees. We're at the top of the Carpathian Mountains. It's so cold that we would get back to the hotel, and the medic on set was a Romanian paramedic. And he goes, no problem. I know you're a little depleted. I'll give you a IV intravenous cocktail. And I said, moosh. Great. So me and the other actor, we're getting hooked up to IVs every night. But I've told this story before, and I'll never forget where we've got horses. It's the coldest day we've shot -54 degrees and the winds are whipping. And the animal wrangler slash craft service guy comes up to the director and he goes, listen, not a big deal, but frost is beginning to Develop on the horse's belly. And if we don't stop shooting, it will be minutes.

[Josh]

Oh my God.

[Ben]

Yeah, bro. And I was like, I quit. I just, I went up to the director, said, listen to me, this movie, no movie is worth an animal dying. This movie in particular, not worth an animal dying. Okay? I'm like, get that horse in some warmth or otherwise. I quit. And thankfully they did.

[Josh]

Josh Peck, the equestrian. Josh Peck, the lover of horses.

[Ben]

Lover of horses.

[Josh]

Love, I love horses too. Horses are magic.

[Ben]

I think it's stupid that we ride them.

[Josh]

I hate that we ride them in a New York City. I don't mind sometimes and maybe this is wrong. I don't mind like the cowboy type riding them. I, I, I like using them as transportation. I think is like, is really cool. I, I definitely think that like some fat fuck. We've spoken about this at length with like his five daughters on a carriage in the city. Having the horse pull the carriage with its hooves on the boiling concrete. This is no good. No, but, but I don't mind. Montana horse. Yeah. You know what? The horse can't tell me if he's in pain. I think the horse doesn't mind it. That said, if you're too fat, don't be on a horse. Like I, I've told this story. I rode, ironically, a horse named Olivia. I think Olivia. I told this story before your time. It was in Utah and I was probably 275 pounds. And the horse, Olivia was a Clydesdale. She was enormous. Enormous. That said she still took my ass up a mountain. And there's no way she was happy.

[Ben]

Oh my God.

[Josh]

No way, no way. It wasn't like we were just like going in circles. I was mountain climbing on a horse. Can I, this is no good.

[Ben]

Can I play Olivia the horse?

[Josh]

Yes.

[Ben]

And you give the play by play of like you walk up to the horse, you throw your leg over.

[Josh]

Yes. First I pet the side of the horse. I'm like, hi horse, it's nice to see you. We're friends. I like you. Trust me. Trust me. I hop up and now I'm caboose on the horse. You just see the guide go up to the horse and give her a nice shot of an inhaler. Oh my God, that's so terrible. So, yeah, so yeah, Olivia's dead. And yeah, I hope not. I hope not. The glue factory. Where the hell did that come from? That's not true, right?

[Ben]

I don't know.

[Josh]

Did they make horses? Did they make glue out of horses?

[Ben]

Well, they used to say that they would make lampshades and soap out of our Jewish ancestors from the concentration camps. You've heard this? Yes.

[Josh]

Yes, I have. I have.

[Ben]

Is that true?

[Josh]

I don't know. Maybe it's keepsake.

[Ben]

Sorry. Me, too.

[Josh]

I hope not. It is a keepsake. Sure. I mean, are we not allowed to find silver lining?

[Ben]

Victor Frankel.

[Josh]

A momento for a momento of the times. I don't know. I don't know. It's.

[Ben]

Yes.

[Josh]

Yeah, it got dark quick.

[Ben]

No, it's not so dark. Listen, these are the times in which we live in.

[Josh]

I've told you that I think we should start doing things with the foreskin.

[Ben]

I would remember that. So. No.

[Josh]

I'm just saying right now you're taking. You're taking a son's foreskin, eight days old, and you're typically throwing it in the trash like it's nothing. How about you make something right? Like, maybe it's. I don't know. I wouldn't dehydrate it and turn it into a chip. But maybe you could frame it and maybe you could put it in. Or maybe you could taxidermy it and use it as a part of a larger schmeck or. Are you following me? Are you on this path or. We don't need to do anything with the foreskin.

[Ben]

Put it in a lab, grow a new Ben.

[Josh]

I love that. Yes, I'm in.

[Ben]

Yes, Ben.

[Josh]

Okay, good. I'd love a new Ben. Another Ben.

[Ben]

Tell me this, because we have very different childhoods, and I think you look back at yours more fondly than I look back at mine. But, you know, we both grew into wonderful men. What's one thing with your beautiful boy coming into this world that you're like, I'm going to do everything in my power to make sure that he doesn't go through or develop this thing that you have or went through in your life. Is there one thing where you're like, I had a great life. Love my parents, love my adolescence. But there's one thing in particular I really want to shield my son from.

[Josh]

Do you have something?

[Ben]

Well, my life is a giant one.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Ben]

I mean, I think mine is. I really.

[Josh]

I don't think your life is a giant one, by the way. But continue.

[Ben]

It's not. I have, for me, it's, you know, stability that I really want to give my kids. Cause I lived a cool, interesting life, and it worked out, and I feel very lucky. But I think there's. I think that kids up to a certain age having really secure Roots is a gift and important, and it makes them willing to take risks later in life.

[Josh]

Yes, yes, totally. What would I change? The question was, what do I want to shelter him from that maybe I experienced? Yeah, it's a really, really good question. One I want to shelter him. In general, I think that people go back and forth on this, and I guess it changes if you don't live in a big city, but when you live in a big city, you can only shelter a kid so much. But people look at sheltering as if it's such a terrible thing. It's only a terrible thing if you raise the kid to be, like, a racist bigot. Right. But if you teach them right from wrong and to have empathy and to love everyone that they come in contact with, I think that sheltering them from the terrible depths of the world is an enormous blessing. Like, kids don't need to grow up so hard. I didn't grow up hard, but I'm saying in general, trying to think of something specific that I would change. I definitely have, like, some anxiety around. I would say eating. Eating is the one thing that I would want to make sure of. Like, I would. I want to try my hardest to not have my child have what is a version of an eating disorder. Typically, people think of eating disorders when they think of not eating, like bulimia or something like that. But we both had eating disorders. I think in general, every member of my family at one point was obese. And I think that that diet culture, I think that the country is changing. I think that our foods are changing, which I think is awesome. So automatically he's coming into a world that's just a little bit better. Like, I was thinking yesterday, Claudia's been loving having cereal when she's pregnant. And, like, you just, like, look at the back. Like, she can have whatever, she should have whatever she wants. But, like, you look at the back, these cereals of 20 grams of added sugar in, it's just crazy to me. And like, you're thinking to yourself, if you're predisposed to sugar, making you feel a certain way, like an endless pit. For me, sugar is an endless pit. If I have added sugar, I'm going to be eating just for sport. It's just something that happens to me when I have sugar. So, like, being able to just help him understand that you can eat whatever you want in moderation, that you shouldn't have too much sugar, that it's not a flex to overeat. I think trying to shield him from that kind of stuff. Would be awesome. Diet culture in general. I would love if he never had to go on a diet that said he will, and he's gonna be so cute and fat.

[Ben]

But, yeah, well, to your point, I think, like, I don't think your parents even knew. Like, I don't think they didn't knew. Right. Like, you talked about being on slim fast when you were a kid. Right. Like, yes, we didn't know. They didn't know any of this stuff. And so they were. So I'm speaking in general terms here, because our parents. My mom's older than your parents, but it's of a northeastern Jewish cultural generational parent. This is a generation of people so obsessed with food, it must have been also as a byproduct of having the greatest generation as parents. So that coming out of World War II rationing, there was such a surplus of just access to as much as they want that it became like, the joke amongst my Jewish relatives and family is just like, what is spoken about at lunch is what we're having for dinner, and what's spoken about at dinner is what we're having tomorrow. And it's just like, I'm so glad to not give my kids that.

[Josh]

Yeah, it's gonna be really hard. Like, the idea of watching TV without. Without a snack, like, you can't do. I don't ever remember a time where I would do any activity in my house without eating.

[Ben]

But it's not like you're coming from. It's not like you're having this kid four or five years ago where you had those not as great habits, and you were at your biggest. Like, you've really done an incredible job. Like, you've changed so many habits. You eat so much healthier. You're in such great shape now. Like, don't you think you're already starting so much ahead?

[Josh]

Yes, because I'm very, very aware. I don't want to speak for my parents. I don't know what they thought necessarily. I'm very in tune with what makes me not feel good. Like, we've spoken about this before. Whether I'm celiac or not, if I have a bagel during a podcast episode, I'm gonna fall asleep. So I try to avoid bagels during the day when I know that my brain needs to be alert. I'll save it for a time where I don't need that. Right. Or I'll try to avoid added sugars because they don't make me feel good. I'm more anxious when I have too much added sugar. I think that there are things like that. But at the same time as I'm even talking about this, Josh, this, this concept, like I need to avoid things is also bad. Like, it's not bad to have something unhealthy. It's bad to have. It's bad to need to have so much of it. Like, I still have this problem. I'm. I love dates, right? But I found a way to have six. Nobody should be eating six dates at a time. Seven dates at a time is that much. You don't know? Like, I guess the serving size on the back says two to three. I have seven. That's what makes me think about it.

[Ben]

But doing that a few times a.

[Josh]

Day, no, I'm doing it once every two days.

[Ben]

When it's, I mean, if that's like the major snack, I don't think it's like some horrible thing.

[Josh]

This episode of the Good Guys podcast is brought to you by our friends at OpenPhone. If you're running a business, you know that every time you have a missed call, you're leaving money on the table. We don't want to leave money on the table. We love money. When every customer conversation matters, you need a phone system that keeps up and helps you stay connected. That's why you need OpenPhone. Because OpenPhone is the number one business phone system that streamlines and scales your customer communications. It works through an app on your phone or computer. So no more carrying two phones or using a landline. With OpenPhone, your team can share one number and collaborate on customer calls and texts like a shared inbox. How cool is that? That way any teammate can pick up right where the last person left off, keeping response times faster than ever. Plus, with AI powered call transcripts and summaries, you'll be able to automate follow ups, ensuring you'll never miss a customer interaction again. So whether you're a one person operation drowning in calls and texts, or have a large team that needs better collaboration tools, OpenPhone is a no brainer. See why over 50,000 businesses trust OpenPhone to manage their business calls and texts. So folks, if this is of interest to you, Openphone is offering my listeners 20% off your first six months at openphone.com goodguys that's O P E N P-H-O-N-E.com goodguys and if you have existing numbers with another service, Openphone will port them over at no extra charge. Openphone. No missed calls, no missed customers. Hi Zoe Saldana. Welcome to T Mobile. Here's your new iPhone 16 Pro on us. Thanks. And here's my old phone to trade in. You don't need to trade in. When you switch to T Mobile, we'll give you a new iPhone 16 Pro. Plus we'll help you pay off your old phone.

[Ben]

Up to 800 bucks and you still get to keep it.

[Josh]

There's always a trade in. Not right now.

[Ben]

AT T Mobile.

[Josh]

I feel like I have to give you something in return for karma.

[Ben]

That's okay.

[Josh]

I don't really have much in my purse. Oh, let's see. Hand sanitizer. It's lavender. I'm good.

[Ben]

Seriously.

[Josh]

Let me check this pocket. Oh, mints.

[Ben]

Really, I'm fine.

[Josh]

Oh, I have raisins. I'm a mom. Wait, wait one sec. I've got cupcakes in the car.

[Ben]

It's our best iPhone offer ever. Switch to T Mobile. Get a new iPhone 16 Pro with Apple intelligence on us. No trade in needed.

[Josh]

We'll even pay off your phone up to 800 bucks with 24 monthly bill credits. New line 100 plus a month on experience beyond Finance Agreement 999.99 and qualifying ported for well qualified plus tax and $10 connection charge. Payout via virtual prepaid card. Allow 15 days credits and balance due if you pay off earlier. Cancel ct mobile.com this episode of the Good Guys podcast is brought to you by our [e-mail] booking. Yeah. From vacation rentals to hotels across the US, booking.com has the ideal summer stay for absolutely anyone, even those who might seem impossible to please. Whether you're booking for yourself, your partner, your sleep light rise, early mom, or your high maintenance group chat, you can find exactly what you're booking for on booking.com booking. Yeah, folks, we're talking about the group chat today, okay? We have a boys trip. Maybe we're going golfing. We love a good golf trip. Okay, but accommodations are always an issue. That is before I discovered booking.com if I could find my perfect stay on booking.com, then anyone can find exactly what you are booking for on booking.com, booking. Yeah, one year we went to Sea island in beautiful Georgia. Okay? It is an absolutely gorgeous, gorgeous, gorgeous golf course. Gorgeous place. But you know, the rooms are a premium at that resort and the houses are just so gorgeous. And I found a house on booking.com that's right. I booked a beautiful estate. We were looking out at this gorgeous water. This beautiful house came with a hot tub, a pool, six bedrooms. It was absolutely fantastic. Of course, I took the master suite. I did find it. Okay, don't come for me. I found it. I deserve the nicest room, don't I? Should I not have taken the nicest room? I don't know. But folks, if I could find my perfect stay on booking.com, then anyone can find exactly what you're booking for on booking dot com. Booking that. Yeah. Book today on the site or in the app. I guess my. My point more is just like I. I just still eat when I'm not on Manjaro or whatever the hot dog is. I still eat in abundance. That's still my problem. It's not what, it's how much. I will eat a salad, but I will eat the biggest fucking salad you've ever seen with 250 grams of chicken. And even when I'm full, I will eat and eat and eat. And I would love nothing more than for him not to have that addictive personality towards food because it's crippling. It's a crippling feeling to know that you are too full and to eat more.

[Ben]

Yeah, it's an interesting thing. And I think it's all I remember. What Paige and I do a good job, I think with. And that's because of Paige, is like, we don't embarrass. I. I feel like people, grown ups growing up. When I was a kid in the 90s, grown ups had no problem embarrassing you in front of other people if you hadn't had food issues, of course. And I think my mom, actually, I give her credit because she was sensitive to it because I think she had had her own struggles. But you'd have aunts, uncles, cousins, these Nebuchadnezzi, these big mouth Jews, like, you're eating too much. You're a walking heart attack. I'd be like, I'm nine. And they'd be like, I can see them writing on the wall.

[Josh]

But terrible.

[Ben]

I. And what Paige and I will do with Max is we'll say like, listen, dude, like, enjoy. Great. Have fun. But like, if you're. If we're gonna crush it at a birthday party for lunch or for dinner, like, then the. The meals surrounding it are going to be healthy. And I remember once Paige was kind of getting on me to be like, make sure that he was eating healthier. Because I'm. I'm dad, I'm fun. I am fun, fun, fun, fun. I'm like, come on, let's crush a cupcake. No one's looking. And it's four in the afternoon. Time to celebrate. But we were At a party with friends, and there were a bunch of kids around, and they were all going to get cupcakes. And I said, max. And he didn't look over. And I said, max, Peck. And he looked over when all the kids were eating. This, like, sits with me. I feel really horrible about it. It's like a bad memory. And I said, mm, mm. And he just was like, but everyone else is having it. And I was like, uh. And it was like, one of the rare times. Cause he's not that kid. Where I saw him start to well up, like, at 4 or 5 years old. And I was like, damn it. And I. And I remember, like, my wife saw it. She's like, pick your battles. What are you doing? Like, this isn't the time. And I'm like, oh, I thought we had a plan. And I took Max over to the side, and I said, go get the cupcake. And I was like. And I just. I tried to explain, at least. I'm like. Cause I didn't want it to go completely brushed under the rug. But I was like, you know, we're trying to eat, you know, healthy at times, and I didn't realize. And we are at a party with your buddies, and I want you to enjoy, too, but we just have to know that we'll try to eat healthier at other meals. And he got it. But you know what I mean? It's a balance.

[Josh]

It's a balance. And it's also this idea. I. I don't think I learned until recently that if you skipped a meal, you weren't gonna die. Right? You know, Like, I guess Yom Kippur is, like, the only thing that, like, sort of teaches you that or taught me that at a young age. Like, you're not gonna die. But, like, we put a real emphasis on, you need breakfast, lunch, dinner, and snacks. And I think that just, like, constant feeding to the wrong type of person creates this just like, ah, I'm a dumpster. I was a dumpster. And the second that I stopped eating breakfast, I became less of a dumpster. Because if you eat fucking something delicious and sugary in the morning, at least for me, my day is fucked, right? Completely fucked. If I French toast for breakfast, I'll see you in Vegas. Like, it's over. I'm not working for a second. I just can't. I don't know. And it's about knowing your body, so. And maybe he gets great genes. Maybe he. You never know. He could be a walking stick. I doubt it. But maybe he's One of those people, fast metabolism, can eat whatever they want. Again, doubt it. But I'm not going to. It would be. Even as I'm saying this, I'm saying, like, I'm not going to limit, but, like, I hope I don't need to limit.

[Ben]

You will, but it'll. It'll be within reason.

[Josh]

Wow. We're so deep. What is this, Jay Shetty?

[Ben]

I don't know. Who knew? Who knows?

[Josh]

Where do we go from here?

[Ben]

Nowhere. Let's call it. Okay. Who will be the first? Okay. And granted, I know that you're more private than I am about these things at times, so feel free to just cut me off at any time. Who will be the first person to see the baby?

[Josh]

Oh.

[Ben]

To visit at the hospital.

[Josh]

Oh. Who?

[Ben]

Oh.

[Josh]

Got it. Okay. I was going to say, like, me or Claudia. Like, I'm probably Claudia.

[Ben]

You kind of see him at the same time.

[Josh]

Probably our parents would be my guess.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Josh]

I don't know, though.

[Ben]

Are they.

[Josh]

I don't know.

[Ben]

What's. Like, is the plan that they'll be, like, in the waiting room?

[Josh]

No plan. We got to figure that out. Yeah, no plan.

[Ben]

I'm still trying to figure out kids with sugar.

[Josh]

I'm still trying. I'm still trying to get my aero mattress in there. She's like, no, you will instacart it if you need it. I'm like, I'm bringing my aero mattress.

[Ben]

Who care? What does she care? She's micromanaging. Tell Claudia to worry about, you know, delivery. We'll worry about the aero mattress. Real delivery of Chinese food. What are we thinking?

[Josh]

Yes, we are ordering in. I don't know what we're ordering, but we're going to be getting something tasty. I'm definitely getting Second Avenue Deli. Good question. What is she going to eat? She. She loves a good chicken finger. We'll get her a nice chicken nuggets. Maybe McDonald's nug or. Or something. She'll. She'll love that.

[Ben]

Yes. Nothing says baby like thigh meat.

[Josh]

Yes. Gorgeous.

[Ben]

Love it.

[Josh]

Delicious.

[Ben]

I want to see Claudia housing those little boots. Those little chicken nugget boots.

[Josh]

So delish. Ooh, what is.

[Ben]

That's a good.

[Josh]

What did Paige eat in the hospital? Is she. Is she. She's a big. She doesn't eat. I guess she doesn't eat fish. I was gonna say, like, is she, like, a sushi? Because Claude doesn't eat sushi, so, like, all these, like, limits, like, oh, you can't eat this. Claudia doesn't eat that shit anyways.

[Ben]

Right. Paige is vegan, but there's Joan's Chinese chicken salad. No chicken salad. It's a very famous LA salad you had. Took you there after our hike.

[Josh]

Delish.

[Ben]

So I know her. She'll be wanting that.

[Josh]

That's an amazing spot. They give you a nice metal bowl to eat out of class. That's class.

[Ben]

You know, what are the best bowls? Metal or wooden?

[Josh]

Yes, wooden. I just sometimes think, did you wash it? Metal I love. Because it stays nice and cold. It's like when you go to a restaurant, you get a metal straw. Oh, that's class. A cold metal straw with your Diet Coke elevates it to another dimension.

[Ben]

But a wood bowl makes me feel like I'm eating wings at the Ponderosa.

[Josh]

Like it. It's. It. It isn't. It's a nice touch. It's a nice touch. Wooden bowls like ketchup on the table.

[Ben]

If ketchup is on the table, I know we're about to have fun.

[Josh]

Yes.

[Ben]

Condiments on the table. Like if there's a. If there is a jam or a jelly in one of those metal containers with the lid like this that someone could have literally put their penis in in between the meals, and they haven't checked, and they go, that's not our business. Either you use it or you don't. I like that.

[Josh]

Have I mentioned jelly on this podcast before or.

[Ben]

No, you don't. Stop mentioning. No, I don't know if I have it.

[Josh]

If I have. It was years ago that said I would go to the diner with my mom all the time, probably the ages of 5 to 12, and she would have to stop me from eating plain jelly packets. I would eat three or four, and then she'd have to cut me off. I loved those fucking jelly packets, Josh. Strawberry. Grape. I draw the line at orange. What are you nuts? Who put. Who makes this orange jelly? It's disgusting.

[Ben]

That's when you know the inmates are running the asylum, when they're deciding what's crazy of which flavor it's okay to eat. Of the jelly.

[Josh]

No good.

[Ben]

That.

[Josh]

No good.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Josh]

You like orange jelly?

[Ben]

No. But I think it's funny that you're housing bear jelly out of the little satchels, but you're like, I draw the line at orange. I'm not nuts.

[Josh]

No, I'm not nuts. I draw the line at orange. And my sister used to eat plain butter. She ate the butter packets. Or what are.

[Ben]

Shout out, Maddie. And clearly she knew she was celiac early on, and her body was telling her what she needs.

[Josh]

I was going to say now she's unbelievably intolerant to milk. She ate enough dairy that she made herself somehow intolerant.

[Ben]

What? Really?

[Josh]

Yes. And for me, I think it was the opposite. I just ate my way through diarrhea from fettuccine Alfredo until I got to the promised land where my stomach was like, okay, you can eat it.

[Ben]

That's good to know that. Yeah, you inoculated yourself. It's like an allergen.

[Josh]

But wouldn't you think she could have. She was eating plain butter.

[Ben]

You know, some people aren't the lucky ones. Ben.

[Josh]

Different strokes, different strokes.

[Ben]

Ugh. Fettuccine Alfredo.

[Josh]

This episode of the Good Guys podcast is brought to you by our friends at Bobby. Folks, let's be real. Feeding your baby isn't a one size fits all. That's why bobi exists to support you wherever you are in your journey. Whether you're exclusively formula feeding, combo feeding, or just need a backup can in the pantry, Bobi's got your back. Bobi's formulas are USDA clean clean label, certified and modeled after breast milk. So they're easy on tiny tummies. How cute. Choose from their OG much loved organic original infant formula, their grass fed whole milk recipe, which is the gentler option for sensitive babies, or their exciting new organic whole milk recipe. The world's first and only Bobby is proudly mom founded and mom led. The entire team is moms that set a new standard for infant formula. And over 500,000 parents trust Bobi to nourish their babies. And they're just getting started, folks. Today, if this is something that interests you, Bobi is offering an additional 10% off your purchase with the code GoodGuys. Visit hi Bobby. I love that URL. Hi Bobby. Hi Bobby. To find the Bobby formula that fits your journey, that's H I B O-B-B-I-E.com with the code goodguys. This episode of the Good Guys podcast is brought to you by DraftKings Casino. Spring is in full bloom on DraftKings Casino. New offers and promos are sprouting up daily. Right now, new players can play five bucks on anything and get 350 casino spins instantly on a featured slot game. Download the app and sign up with Code goodguys. Take the featured slot for a spin and explore thousands of others in the DraftKings game library. Check back daily to claim the hottest offers and promos on DraftKings Casino. The crown is yours. Gambling problem. Call 1-800-GAMBLER in Connecticut, help is available for problem gambling. Call 888-789-7777 or visit ccpg.org Please play responsibly. 21 + physically present in Michigan, New Jersey, Pennsylvania, West Virginia only. Void in Connecticut and Ontario eligibility restrictions apply. New customers only. Non withdrawable casino spins Valid for featured game only and expire in 168 hours. See [e-mail] promos ends June 15, 2025 at 11:59pm Eastern Time.

[Ben]

Should we get to a story?

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Ben]

Well, someone said in the New York Post, I had a threesome with a bisexual woman and my dead husband's ghost. He finally got his happy ending. He's her boo. A UK widow brought new meaning to being with someone in spirit after allegedly having a threesome with a woman and the ghost of her dead husband. I don't believe in a literal afterlife, but I felt his presence as we hooked up, Nikki Wake, 53, told James Press while describing her alleged post mortem menageritois. That's cool.

[Josh]

It is cool. I don't really understand it, but it's cool. Like he was there watching. This isn't really a threesome. This is more of a spiritual threesome. Right? But there's no.

[Ben]

It was a. Yeah, it was a spiritual cucking.

[Josh]

Yeah.

[Ben]

Diddy's new album.

[Josh]

I sent you a. I sent you a ditty. Like somebody who claimed like a new lawsuit, she wrote that he. He has the. A penis the size of a Tootsie Roll that.

[Ben]

Now we're getting cruel.

[Josh]

That's tough. That's tough. A penis the size of a Tootsie Roll.

[Ben]

That's.

[Josh]

I can't even understand. That's not a micropenis. That's nothing. Have you ever seen these micro penises?

[Ben]

Yeah. Nick Antonian, my friend Jonah, he has a micro penis. I know it. I've seen it. It's like an elevator button. Yeah. It's crazy.

[Josh]

Oh my God. It's a lot we haven't spoken about. Nick, when you want to make a video, just a dumb, hilarious video, do you just have like a, like, hey, Nick, I want to make a dumb, hilarious video. And that's what you do.

[Ben]

Yeah. Nick Antonio is one of my best friends and one of the funniest people I know. And he's down to clown. He's D4W down for whatever.

[Josh]

There's nothing better than that, than a friend that just like you call them. And he's down. Yeah, we all, we all need more friends like that. Not ones that are Going to ask questions. Not ones that are going to say who else is going? I fucking hate that. If I invite you somewhere and you ask me who else is going? You're uninvited. Am I not enough? Okay.

[Ben]

Oh, I, I'm not okay with that at all. I couldn't agree with you more, Ben.

[Josh]

Yeah, it's not right. It's not right.

[Ben]

Who else is going? Your mother.

[Josh]

Yeah, exactly. She's going.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Josh]

To bed with me.

[Ben]

Yes.

[Josh]

Zinger. Zinger. Yeah. Just like a friend. That's down to clown of it.

[Ben]

Couldn't agree more. Well, there's a new breed of cheating on the rise and women are fighting back. A Perth woman has revealed she dumped her boyfriend for subscribing to a popular porn stars only fans account stating it's the same as cheating. And it turns out she's not alone in that view. New data has revealed most Australians believe that if their partner looks at explicit videos and photos shared by adult, adult content creators on the popular subscription site that it's akin to strain from their relationship. Olivia, what do you think?

[Olivia]

I think the line gets drawn when you're paying for content. Like there's so much free pornography on the Internet that if you want to see something else and that's something that you choose to watch then like you can get it for free. I think like paying for it and like you can talk to people to like chat with them on OnlyFans. Like I don't like that. That feels gross to me. That feels really gross.

[Josh]

This is interesting. This is the, this is the first time that I felt the Gen Z. You used to. Only you had to pay for porn. Like there was a time where like to get good porn. Did you had to.

[Ben]

I never did.

[Josh]

I would use like a friend's browser's account. That's where you got the good porn.

[Ben]

But I feel like pornhub's been around for forever. I, I hear and, and before that there was like some like, weren't we like torrenting it from like Limewire or something like I don't know or, or.

[Josh]

The Robin Bird show which we've discussed at length with the 67 year old bush on cable. But I agree Olivia, on the OnlyFans if you're talking to them cheating. Also in today's day and age you don't need to pay for porn. Certainly you don't need to. This is a waste of money. This is a waste of money. It's completely, it's. There's unbelievable access. It's fantastic for those that Watch it. Not me. The devil.

[Ben]

When we had Kid David on the pod, he was saying how, you know, Gen Z sort of has these new norms with. Of filming and they're much more sort of open and free with the idea of sort of documenting their. Their romantic interludes. Olivia. And feel free not to answer, but do you find like women are more into porn lately or. No?

[Olivia]

I don't know if it's more into it. I think it's just more vocal. Yeah. More open and like vocal about it because, like, girls probably. I mean, I don't know, like all my. Everybody has like. You know what I mean?

[Josh]

I don't know.

[Olivia]

It's not like as much of a taboo, I think, for women as it once was, but I just think there's more of a conversation around it now.

[Ben]

Interesting.

[Josh]

Fascinating.

[Ben]

My wife makes fun of it all the time and I'm like, I don't make fun of your interests.

[Josh]

I'm like, so what if I like fat chicks eating sandwiches? Like, what do you. What's it to you? Yes, what's it to you? So what if I like Short Kings porn? What do you. Yes, so what?

[Ben]

I like to see a nice 411 guy dominating.

[Josh]

So what if I like BBW x BYOB, you know, so what if I.

[Ben]

Latinx BBW BYOB.

[Josh]

My NSFW, my, my favorite. Is that again, not. There's no porn being watched. That said, I have heard that when you go to another country and you're watching porn, all of a sudden the porn is in their country. We see that.

[Ben]

That's why Canada so much. No, I'm kidding.

[Josh]

If you, if you don't think that your phone is spying on you, go on pornhub and see what comes up. When you're in another country, they're all speaking the language. They know where you are and they know what porn you're watching and they're going to use it against you.

[Ben]

It's not the language, they just know. Because everything changes on your phone when you leave the country.

[Josh]

Is that true? Yeah.

[Ben]

You're on a different wireless plan. It's different satellites on.

[Josh]

You are. Yeah. But you could be on Wi fi. It depends. I get it on WI Fi, but.

[Ben]

It knows that you're in. In a different country.

[Josh]

I guess that's true. It's probably. It's probably going through the plan. That's true. Okay, so it's the Verizon. It's. They're sharing our details.

[Ben]

Well, Taylor Swift subpoenaed as witness in lively Baldoni case. Taylor Swift's being dragged further into the plague, lively Justin Baldoni beef. She just got hit with a subpoena in the case. I mean, no matter what side you're on here, I would feel like I would be terrified at the prospect that someone as big as her is being asked to speak because her fandom is going to just turn on anyone and everyone, right?

[Josh]

100%. I feel like it's actually pretty crazy that she's being asked to speak. I don't know why I would have assumed that, like, if you're so famous, like, you get out of jury duty. She couldn't get out of court. Like, there's nobody else.

[Ben]

It's a subpoena.

[Josh]

Yeah. That's crazy. My God. But my God. Yeah, I wouldn't want subpoena.

[Ben]

Yeah. Girl name.

[Josh]

I love it.

[Ben]

I love that. Yeah.

[Josh]

Subpoena saver.

[Ben]

Subpoena peck.

[Josh]

Love it, Love it. It's great.

[Ben]

Okay, we'll do one speak pipe real quick, and then we'll get to what are you not Moment of the week. Basically. If you want to get advice, ask us questions, go to speakpipe.com goodguys. Keep it brief. Brevity is key. Oh, boy. Keep it short, we beg of you. Let's hit up anonymous.

[Anonymous]

Hi, good guys. I was calling because my husband has an extremely creepy uncle. I'm talking, like, comes to family Easter and talks. Talks about, like, the girth of his wiener, his dog's wiener. Just like, you know, generally uncomfortable things. And then he actually started sending Victoria's secret catalogs to our house with his name on them. And then just making, like, obscene comments to my husband of, like, oh, yeah, I just got done banging your wife. And. But, like, way more graphics than that. I could never repeat. It's been horrible. My husband has just completely cut him off and just said, like, absolutely not. Not. Okay, I'm out. We're good on that. But my husband's aunt just, like, acts like none of this is happening. She's very aware of all of it, but nothing changes. She doesn't do anything different. And she continues to bring him to family events. Do you think that I should just make a blanket statement of he is not allowed, don't ever come back? Or should I just continue to keep the peace and know that there's this creepy ass man at event around my children? Thank you.

[Josh]

Holy shit. I feel like we should call the FBI. So sorry you're going through that. That's awful. I'm sorry. But, like, the wife isn't allowed either, right? Like, this Is not like a. Oh, crazy uncle Tommy can't come, but. But his wife, Aunt Linda is more than welcome. Like, no, Linda, you also need to be accountable for your husband's actions. And you can't come around anymore. That's completely unacceptable. Very scary. Very gross and terrible. I'm sorry. Gosh.

[Ben]

Yeah. There's a term with the kids, it's called Wylan. Your uncle Wylan.

[Josh]

Wylan.

[Ben]

Out he be Wylan.

[Josh]

He does.

[Ben]

And I would suggest you tell him to. This is like when someone talks like that. Like you need to like, you just need to get real clear and be like, dog. Nah, you're talking that crazy shit again. And if you keep talking that crazy shit, oh boy. Will you never see me or my family. Oh boy.

[Josh]

Because you bring up a great point. It's like also the guy needs to like grow some balls. Like, like punch him in the face. Like fist fight him. Like if he's your crazy uncle, it's not a pass. That's not a thing. Like be a man, Beat him up or call the cops. This is like, it's copsworthy. If he's that creepy. If he's like going up to your husband and saying how he had sex with you, like he shouldn't be anywhere near you. Creeper, creeper. Go creep.

[Ben]

Last one from. Let's see, let's see. Sarah.

[Sarah]

Hi there. Good guys. More on here of pretty much since you guys started.

[Josh]

Bless you.

[Sarah]

But I recently broke up with my boyfriend and I want to make sure he's doing okay. But I don't want to overstep or make him sad or uncomfortable because I was the one who broke up with him. But I just was kind of looking to know like what is a male's perspective on the person reaching out to them if they're the one who broke up with them. I don't see us getting back together in the near future just because of logistical reasons. We were doing long distance and neither of us were really going to make that next step into moving to the other. But I still obviously have love and care for him and I just want to check in on him and make sure he's okay. Would appreciate your guys input. Thanks.

[Josh]

It's a tough one.

[Ben]

I have felt compelled after breakups to wish that person a happy birthday, see how they're doing. And it's been advised to me to not to just leave.

[Josh]

I would agree. I would agree with. I would agree. I think that it's a little selfish to be totally honest. And what he would end up feeling is because this is the mind of a guy. At least a guy that got broken up with. He would end up feeling like, oh, if she's checking up on me, there's a chance.

[Ben]

Right? Right.

[Josh]

You're giving him false hope. So it's selfish, because you're getting the answer that you need, that he's okay. But in turn, you're hurting him deeper, and you're probably stopping him from getting over you. So I wouldn't.

[Ben]

Right. Like, I'm real stupid, guys. And Olivia knows. And so I remember I had dated this girl, and she reached out and was like, oh, I wanted to grab something that I left at your place, like, three months ago. And I was like, oh, been wondering when you'd want that. Absolutely. And my friend said, she clearly wants to hook up with you again. And I was like, nah, she just needs her Xbox controller. And he was like, okay. And then later that night, I was like, I was not expecting this. And she's like, why do you think I got my hair done? I was like, it looks great.

[Josh]

That's funny. What are you, nuts?

[Ben]

Yeah, let's do it.

[Josh]

All right. What are you, nuts?

[Ben]

Do it. No, you go, Ben.

[Josh]

People, places and things. Something sticking in your craw. You look at the lady on the street. She's barefoot. What are you, nuts? Put on some shoes. That could be my. What are you, nuts? No, but my what are you, nuts, Josh is. I don't know if I'm assuming that this isn't just a New York thing, but it would be classic if it was just New York. You go into an apartment building. We can't have 13 floors. Like, it's really dumb. It's really dumb. You're on the 13th floor. You have to call it 14. But it's really 13.

[Ben]

We know it's.

[Josh]

I wonder if this is just, like, a New York thing, if this happens everywhere. I understand 13 is an unlucky number. We still have 13th as a day of the month, right? Friday the 13th. We feel a little queasy about maybe don't, like, see any black cats on Friday the 13th. But we didn't completely erase it. Landlords completely erased it. It's so strange. What are you, nuts?

[Ben]

So true. I agree. And if you live on the 14th floor, you know what's up?

[Josh]

You live on 13 and you're gonna die.

[Ben]

Yeah. My what are you, nuts? Is from, as I said before, my clubhouse, Costco. I recently was at Costco. And obviously, like any great American love the samples. Always want to see what's being sampled, and I go by one sample stand, and the sample was Oreos. That's what. Are you nuts? I don't need to sample an Oreo. No one does. It's an Oreo. I know what that tastes like.

[Josh]

No, it's a gift. Thank you for the. Thank you for the Oreo that I knew tasted delicious, which is why I picked it up. It will not in any way, shape or form encourage me to or not to buy Oreos because I know what they taste like, and I'll buy them on my own goddamn time. Yes.

[Ben]

Give me a sample of something I never had.

[Josh]

That's nuts, Honestly. And such a waste of money. What is Nabisco doing? That's like, you're. You're at Costco and they're sampling Coke. Like, I know what Coke tastes like and smells like, you know, like.

[Ben]

Like, could you imagine stopping and biting it and being like, get a couple sleeves. This is a good batch.

[Josh]

Nuts.

[Ben]

Nuts.

[Josh]

You know what else is nuts, Josh?

[Ben]

What?

[Josh]

Not giving this episode five stars. That's nuts. What are you, nuts? Listen to us. Wherever you get your podcasts, watch us on YouTube, share our clips. Share our clips. Instagram and YouTube, Mondays and Thursdays, folks. We will see you next time. Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.