← GrowLeader Podcast with Chris Hodges
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Hey, everybody.
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Welcome to the Grow Leader Podcast, where we grow leaders that grow churches by helping them reach their full potential. I'm especially excited about today's episode because we're gonna give you the sneak peek of my brand new book that releases in just eight days on April 14th. It's called Legacy Timeless, I Learned Live and Leave Behind. And today you're actually gonna hear the audio version of the introduction, what I like to call the first and also chapter one. But before we jump in, I just want to say thank you to all of our Grow Leader podcast partners, the Wesleyan Investment Foundation. What an amazing friends they have been to us and the ARC churches. And so many want to say thank you to Studio C. I think they're one of the greatest tools that you
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can use for congregation engagement.
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I think it's very, very important for you to consider having them as one of your partners. And finally, Convoy of Hope, one of of the greatest missions investments I think you can make that really touches the world. So before we jump into the first letter, chapter one, let me give you a little context for the book. This whole project really started as something deeply personal. You guys know that Tammy and I have 12 grandchildren, with actually another one on the way this year. And I found myself thinking, what are the principles I wanna leave behind and give to my grandchildren? What are the life lessons that really
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matter most to me?
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So I wasn't really thinking about writing a book.
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I was just thinking about writing some
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of these principles down. And then my friend John Maxwell said to me, you know, you need to turn this into a book and share these principles with everyone. So I did that. At first, I had about 12 principles. I thought I'd stop there. And then it grew to 18 principles. And then the next thing you know, I had 25 principles. So I eventually landed on 31, so that you can read one principle a day for a month. And about halfway through this writing, something unexpected happened. I was at the end of one chapter, I think it was on chapter 17. And I did what a lot of authors do. I tried to summarize the chapter in the last paragraph, but instead of just wrapping it up, I ended up writing a letter to my grandkids. I actually wrote out Dear Grandkids. And I wrote about that principle from the heart as something I wanted my grandkids to read. And I knew I hit on something, so I took it downstairs and to Tammy, and I said, hey, read this chapter. And then read this letter I wrote at the end of it. And I came back a few minutes later, and Tammy was on the couch crying. It touched her so much. And I thought, all right, I think I've hit on something here. So I went back and I wrote a letter, a personal letter, obviously not to my grandkids. I write it as dear friend, and I've written it at the end of every chapter. And that's where the title came for this book, calling it Legacy Letters. And it's endearing. They're personal. And I hope that as you read this book, you don't just read the principles, but you feel them and ultimately live them. And one more thing. At the very end of the book, there's a page after chapter 31, there's a page that says, only turn this page if you want to hear more about my faith. And I've given the readers a bonus chapter that shares my faith. And it's called the Principle is called you only live Twice, where I talk about eternity and purpose and the reality that all of us one day are going to stand before God. So for now, I'm going to allow you to hear the advanced audio version of this book. You're going to get the first letter or the introduction and chapter one of Legacy Letters. Enjoy.
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My first letter to you, Dear Friend. In my six decades, I've learned that life doesn't hand you clarity. It hands you choices. And those choices, over time, reveal what you value most. If your life isn't going the way you'd like, or if you simply want more from it, a good place to start is by examining the basis for your decisions. That's what this book is all about. This book began as something deeply personal. As I entered my 60s, the beginning of what I call the legacy decades, I felt a growing desire to put into words the values and life lessons I hope to pass on to my children and grandchildren. I've been blessed with a long and meaningful life so far. And like my grandparents who lived well into their 90s, I hope to have many years ahead. But none of us is promised tomorrow. So I decided to write now while I have the clarity and the capacity to articulate the principles that have guided me. And as I began writing, something dawned on me. This isn't just a family legacy. For me, it's a leadership legacy, too. And in this book, I want to share that legacy with you. No matter what your role or calling is. My hope is that my legacy in some way will help you understand and share your own. Legacy is about what we leave behind, and we all have one. The principles here are for all of us and they can shape our lives for good. Somewhere along the way, I decided to stop living by pressure and start living by principle while circumstances change. Principles are timeless and universal. They stand the test of time because they're more than merely a good idea or a piece of advice. They're reliable truth Methods come and go, but principles remain constant. They don't bend with the culture, change with trends, or weaken under pressure. Instead, principles serve as anchors that hold us steady when life gets stormy, as north stars that guide us when the way forward seems unclear, and as trusted friends that stay with us through every season. Principles aren't meant to be memorized. They're meant to be internalized. They become part of you only when you choose to live by them, sometimes imperfectly at first, until they shape your instincts, your habits, and eventually your legacy. They relieve pressure by giving clarity to decisions and direction to your days. They help you focus on choices instead of conditions, on what lasts instead of what fades. In short, the principles you live by create the world you live in. These principles have guided me through mountaintop moments and times in the lowest valleys. Some I've learned from incredible mentors who have modeled the kind of life I've wanted to live. Others, I've learned the hard way, through failure, reflection and quiet resolve. A few came in flashes of clarity, but most were forged in ordinary moments, on morning walks, in late night conversations, and during personal reflection. I've lived with these principles long enough that I can now say they live in me. They aren't recycled cliches or motivational slogans. There are tested truths, time honored companions that have guided my decisions, guarded my integrity, and grounded me when the path wasn't clear. They don't require perfection, just intention. You don't have to be extraordinary to live by them. You just have to be willing. This book is simple by design. You can read it in a month. But if you live it for a year, I believe it will change your life. Here's how. Read one principle each day for 31 days. Let it marinate, reflect, circle the ones that hit you hardest. Then pick your top 11 and spend the next 11 months living one principle at a time. That's it. One principle, one month. One better life. If you'd rather jump around and engage with the principles that resonate most, that works too. Either way, you'll see that I've organized the book into three categories. Number one. Personal principles. Who you are when no one is looking. Two. Relational principles. How you treat the people closest to you. 3. Impact principles. What you want to leave behind every chapter ends with a legacy letter, a short note written from my heart to yours. These aren't speeches or sermons. They're personal reflections, hard won wisdom, and honest encouragement from someone who's still learning every day. Originally, I imagined writing them for my grandchildren. But the more I wrote, the more I realized they were also for the people I lead, the students I mentor, and honestly, for anyone who wants to live a life of meaning and intention, my salutation is simple, dear friend, because that's what I hope we'll become. As you read this book, I wish I could say I came up with all these principles on my own, but that wouldn't be true. I've learned them through the ups and downs of life and especially through the wisdom of mentors. Over the years, I've been shaped by dozens of extraordinary people, friends, pastors, teachers and leaders who help form not just my thinking, but my heart. A handful of these voices stand out in a category I call my Personal Mentor hall of Fame. Their fingerprints are all over the pages that follow, and among them, one man has had more influence on my leadership and my life than anyone else. My friend John Maxwell. Rather than mention him by name in every chapter because I easily could, I'll just say it. No one has taught me more. I've been a student, a disciple, and a friend of John's for more than two decades. If something in this book reminds you of one of his ideas, you're probably right, and I'm proud of that. His wisdom has deeply marked my journey, and I'm forever grateful. Finally, the title. Legacy Letters. Timeless Principles I've Learned, lived, and Leave Behind. Legacy matters to me not because I'm nearing the end, but because I'm more mindful of what remains when I'm no longer in the room. Legacy isn't about headlines or accolades. It's about impact. It's about the ripple effect of how you live, love and lead. I recently came across a powerful example of this kind of intentional living. John D. Rockefeller Sr. One of the wealthiest men in American history, wrote 38 personal letters to his only son. Not about business deals or financial strategies, but about life. They were filled with wisdom, values and heartfelt instruction. In his letters, he talked about humility, generosity, character, and the importance of using wealth for good. One of his most memorable lines was, the poorest man I know is the man who has nothing but money. Rockefeller understood something most people miss. Your real legacy isn't what you leave for people. It's what you leave in them. Those letters shaped his son's life and helped define the Rockefeller family's legacy for generations. That's the kind of intentionality I hope this book inspires, which is why these principles aren't just for leading, they're for living. I'm writing them down because they've served me well and now want to pass them on. If they help you build a better life, a stronger family, or a more grounded sense of purpose, then this book has done its job. One more thing. I don't necessarily assume you come from a faith background. That's totally okay. I've written this book with you in mind. As much as anyone else, eager to consider what they believe and and how they choose to live, I've kept the core principles practical and accessible for everyone. But if you're curious about the faith that drives me and the foundation that all my principles rest on, I've included a bonus chapter at the end. Just don't say I didn't warn you. Take a deep breath, pick up the first principle, and let's build a better life one choice at a time. Sincerely, Chris Part 1 Personal principles who you are when no one is looking Chapter 1 the Big Rocks Principle All's well that begins well. If you don't prioritize your life, someone or something else will. I'll never forget the seminar that changed everything. It was the late 1980s and I was just getting started in ministry. I could preach a decent message and care for people with compassion, but I was drowning in disorganization. My schedule ran me. I didn't run it, and it showed. I was reactive, constantly behind and missing the quiet center that brings peace to a busy life. Then came Stephen Covey, standing in front of a packed room in Denver. Covey held up a wide mouth jar and placed several large rocks inside it, filling it to the top. Is the jar full? He asked. We all nodded. He smiled, then added gravel, which slipped between the spaces, then sand, then water. Finally he said, if you don't put the big rocks in first, you'll never get them in at all. That metaphor exploded in my mind. Suddenly I could see it. I was trying to pour in the sand first. No wonder I was overwhelmed. That illustration redefined success for me. It wasn't about doing more. It was about it was about doing what mattered first. What are the big rocks? Big rocks are not tasks or to do list items. They're immovable. Priorities, faith, family, health, rest, vision and relationships. The non negotiables, the things that, if neglected, cause everything else to fall apart. My big rocks are time with God Time with my wife and family. Physical health and rest. Vision planning and study. Mentoring and investing in others. When these are in place, I'm grounded. When they're not, I can be productive and still feel empty. Think of big rocks like the load bearing beams of a house. You don't see them every day, but without them, the entire structure collapses. The same is true for our lives. No matter how fast you're moving or how full your schedule is, if the foundational priorities are missing, the cracks will eventually show. You can build high, but you won't build strong. When I needed it Most There was never a time I needed the big rocks principle more than in 2020. Like the rest of the world, everything that felt stable and predictable in my life was suddenly turned upside down. Routines disappeared overnight. Travel halted, Meetings shifted online, even church. The very rhythm of my life was disrupted. At first I told myself I could push through, but underneath the surface I was battling something deeper. Mental stress, anxiety and a low grade fatigue that didn't go away with a nap. For someone who thrives on structure and clarity, the chaos of that season was quietly chipping away at my well being. During this season, I realized how much I needed the very principle I had taught others for years. Put the big rocks in first. If I wanted to survive, let alone lead through a global crisis, I had to re establish the rhythms that had always grounded me. So I went back to the basics. I prioritized quiet time with God. Each morning I got back to exercise, I redefined my schedule. Not around the urgent, but but around the important. That season taught me that principles don't just guide you when life is going well, they stabilize you when life falls apart. And the big rocks principle became more than a concept for me. It became a lifeline. In a time when everything felt out of order, I had to make sure the right things were in place first. Why Structure Matters we need those big rocks as our foundation. Clinical psychologist Dr. Henry Cloud teaches that the frame or structure that supports a person's emotional house is a clear purpose lived out by routines and structure. Structure around time calms our brains and
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creates a sense of security.
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When our lives are in order to we need order and flow to maximize how we engage with the time we have each day. There is no one size fits all when it comes to structure, of course, but studies have revealed some common elements in effective structures. Trial and error might be necessary. As well as being a student of what works best for you. Productivity and leadership expert Michael Hyatt encourages developing intentional rituals to stay in sync with your purpose and priorities. He maintains that we all rely on memory and habit to function, so it becomes a matter of whether we use rituals intentionally to fulfill our purpose and maintain our priorities, or whether we stick with rituals that may be default time fillers pulling us out of sync. He teaches the startup routine and believes the practice of prescribed procedures doesn't guarantee success, but sets us up to repeatedly and consistently focus on our priorities. Putting this principle into practice keeps you on track to make sure that the details of your day contribute to a bigger picture, the purpose you're called and committed to live out. From my experience, practicing this principle requires identifying the most important items to do first every day, creating startup routines, and eliminating the distractions that can wait. When you put the big rocks in first, you remain confident that you're living on purpose. The sense of purposeful confidence makes it easier to enjoy the gravel and the sand that inevitably slide into each day. You don't have to worry about losing your focus or having your time frequently hijacked by the unexpected. Mastering your morning gives you margin and ensures that all's well because you began well. Morning Alignment Today I woke up at 6am I poured a cup of coffee and headed to the same chair in my home office that I head to every morning. I began with silence. Just a few minutes to let my thoughts settle. Then I read something life giving. I journaled, I prayed, I worshiped, I revisited my values. And most importantly, I did all this before I invited the world in. No phone, no email, no headlines. That's one hour of morning alignment that shapes the rest of my day. It's not rigid. It's relational. It's where I become the person I need to be to carry the weight of what I do. It is so easy to underestimate the power of a slow start. But it's in those quiet, seemingly unproductive moments that clarity is born. Before I solve problems, I need to center my soul. Before I cast vision, I need to renew my perspective. Morning alignment is not a luxury, it's a necessity for long term success. Clock vs Compass Covey introduced another concept that transformed my thinking. The clock and the compass. The clock is about urgency. Appointments, deadlines, pressure. The compass is about direction, values, purpose, vision. You can live by the clock and still be completely lost. But when you lead with the compass, the clock begins to work for you, not against you. So many people I know are busy but aimless. They hustle from one commitment to the next, but rarely pause to ask, am I headed in the right direction? I found in My years of experience and service that the best leaders aren't the ones who do the most, they're the ones who know where they're going. But that's not only true for leaders. We all need purpose and direction to keep on track. The clock tells you what time it is. The compass tells you what matters most. Both are essential, but only one should be allowed to define your course. Let your values steer your decisions and your time will serve your vision. The Eisenhower matrix. President Dwight Eisenhower developed a matrix for decision making that's still used today. It divides tasks into four. Urgent and important. Do it now. Not urgent, but important. Schedule it. Urgent, but not important. Delegate it. Not urgent and not important. Eliminated. The big rocks always live in Quadrant two. They're important, but they don't scream for your attention. That's why they often get pushed aside. But if you neglect them, Quadrant 1 will rule your life. You'll constantly be putting out fires Instead of building a future. Quadrant 2 is where vision lives. It's where the future is shaped. People who live in this quadrant aren't driven by pressure. They're anchored by purpose. This is where we write, think, rest and strategize. It's where you prepare so you don't have to repair. The power of order. Here's a truth I've learned. Order determines capacity. When you do the right things first, you create space for everything else. But when you live randomly, you live reactively. Big rocks are not the same for everyone, but the principle is universal. Schedule what matters most. Prioritize what's irreplaceable. If you're a parent, a big rock might be dinner with your kids or bedtime prayers. If you're a leader, it might be creative planning or mentoring your team. If you're a student, it might be building discipline, setting boundaries and surrounding yourself with people who lift you up. The principle remains. Don't let what screams the loudest determine what matters most. Our priorities either shape our calendars or our calendars will shape our priorities. One leads to peace, the other to pressure. Don't confuse being available with being effective. Your yes has power. Use it on the right things. A personal challenge. The seven day priority reset. If you're ready to put this principle into practice, here's a challenge. Day 1. Write down your five big rocks. What are your non negotiables? Day 2. Schedule one hour for your top rock. Put it on the calendar. Day 3. Identify one sand activity that drains you. Eliminate it. Day 4. Create your morning alignment, even for just 15 minutes. Day 5. Ask someone close to you. Where do you think I waste time? Day 6. Reflect and journal on what changed this week. Day 7. Make one new rhythm a permanent part of your life. Progress, not perfection. You won't always get it right. Life throws curveballs. But perfection isn't the goal. Progress is the goal is to live with intention, not assumption. To build a life, not just manage a calendar. When you lead yourself well, you lead others better. When you make room for what matters, you become someone others can count on. And when your life aligns with your values, you experience peace, even in pressure. That's the power of big rocks. They're the foundation. When everything is uncertain, your values can stay steady. Legacies large and small are built as we create certainty amid chaos. Your structure, the way you protect your priorities, provides that stability. It's not rigidity, its reliability. When people know what to expect from you, they trust you. But having clarity on your big rocks isn't enough. If you don't create space for them, the noise of life will push them out. That's why the next principle, the calendar principle, is so important. Your priorities are only as powerful as your calendar allows them to be. Legacy LETTER Dear friend, There will be seasons when life feels like it's moving too fast. Your calendar will be full. Your responsibilities will stack up, and you'll wake up already behind, wondering how this became normal. I've lived there. I've had seasons when everything felt urgent, when saying yes came easier than slowing down, and when the important things gradually got crowded out by the loud ones. I didn't lose what mattered all at once. I lost it a little at a time without noticing. Until one day I realized I was busy, but not centered. That's why I want to tell you something I wish I had learned sooner rather than later. You don't have to keep up. Don't measure your life by activity. Don't confuse motion with meaning. And don't let a full calendar convince you that you're living a full life. Instead, step back. Take a breath. Ask yourself the question that eventually resets everything. What actually matters most? Those are your big rocks. Put them in first. Guard them carefully. Build everything else around them, and don't apologize for it. The regrets I carry are never about the things I protected. They're about the things I didn't. Your life is going to fill up. It always does. My hope for you is that when it does, it's filled with the people, the moments, and the priorities you'll treasure later. I want you to living with peace, not pressure. Sincerely, Chris.