NO MORE TITS AND ASS - H3 Show #286

Summary

H3 Podcast – NO MORE TITS AND ASS – H3 Show #286

Date: July 17, 2026
Host: Ethan Klein (with Hila Klein, Dan, Jeremy, Nate, Gabe & more)

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Episode Overview

This episode of the H3 Podcast delivers classic comedic commentary and group banter, centering around new European guidelines for photographing women athletes and the broader conversation about objectification in sports media. Along the way, the crew riffs on viral memes ("the meat's frozen solid"), fast-food reviews, wild call-ins, pole vaulting injury fails, UFO footage, Chuck Schumer’s “fartgate,” and a rundown of weird news stories. As always, the mix of absurdity and irreverence is deepened by genuine curiosity and listener engagement.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The “Frozen Solid Meat” Meme (00:03–03:06, recurring)

• Origin: The crew riffs on a line from a Rocky biopic trailer ("The meat is frozen solid") from a recent member stream. It becomes an ongoing joke and metaphor throughout the episode.
  • Quote: "You're gonna be hearing it a lot, right? Frozen solid meat." – Ethan (01:10)
• Usage: The phrase is shoehorned into discussions about food, injury, and takes on a life of its own.

2. Member Stream Recap & Rocky Movie Trailer Watch (03:06–07:07)

• Content reactions: Ethan loves reacting to trailers in member streams, particularly to avoid copyright issues.
• Rocky biopic debate: Extended debate over the “frozen meat” scene—was Stallone sabotaged, or did he just mess up?
  • Quote: "What an idiot. Though you didn't check the meat was thawed. Who just punches meat? Frozen meat. Full frozen meat." – Ethan (06:01)
• Myth-busting: Skepticism over Stallone’s “heroic” stories about injuring himself in Rocky, selling and repurchasing his dog, etc.

3. Fast Food Tangent: McDonald's Live Review (08:38–13:43)

• Gabe checks in live from a McDonald's, reviewing the new Quarter Pounder Deluxe ("Big and Tasty"), and the crew muses over eating lettuce amid an outbreak of explosive diarrhea traced to Taco Bell lettuce.
  • Quote: "I had severe diarrhea for like a few days." – Gabe (11:39)
• Fast food shame: Ethan expresses discomfort eating inside McDonald's.
  • Quote: "There's a sense of shame... I'd rather be caught dead than sit in my car, drive through." – Ethan (16:33)
• Crew discusses: Nostalgia for Carl’s Jr., fast food changes, and regional burger varieties.

4. H3 Merchandise & Puzzle Launch (20:11–24:49)

• New H3 puzzle for VIP deluxe members—Ethan & Hila unbox it, praising the jam-packed H3 references and “Where’s Waldo?” style artwork (props to artist Vronkmum).
  • Quote: "Jam-packed full of beautiful, lovely H3 references. It’s basically where’s Waldo? H3 style." – Ethan (22:53)
• Puzzle features: Hidden checklist of in-jokes/references, limited time offer.

5. Shambhala Festival Plans (25:02–28:07)

• Harley's plans: Going to “Shambhala,” a major multi-day Canadian campout rave, with an eccentric crew including a character with “999” tattoos.
  • Crew jokes: About tracking people with Apple tags and the festival’s reputation for “pro-level” raving.

6. Dr. Candice – YouTube Activist Drama Recap (28:58–37:43)

• Dramatic highlights: They review viral clips of YouTube activist Dr. Candice Matthews confronting (and feuding with) various community members, including “poopy panties press conferences.”
  • Quote: "I think that b**** got Covid in the coochie." – Dr. Candice (37:06)
• Discussion: Boundaries of internet beefs, potential for escalating drama, and the ethics of content stunts.

7. Main Story: New European Guidelines for Photographing Women Athletes (45:32–71:53)

Overview

• Topic: European sports organizations release new guidelines to stop objectifying camera angles in women’s athletics (“no more tits and ass”).
• Setting: Ethan references a prior “Men of Culture” bit—compilation videos focused on “compromising” shots of female athletes.

Key Issues Debated

• Dress codes: Many athletic federations have required women to wear revealing outfits—crew expresses outrage over this and supports letting athletes choose.
  • Quote: "A lot of these sports organizations have dress codes that require the women to wear tiny, tiny, essentially bikinis. And I was like, oh my gosh..." – Ethan (47:55)
• Guideline walkthrough: Ethan and the team analyze sample diagrams showing “acceptable” vs. “problematic” angles (e.g. low, zoomed-in, or “crotch shots”).
• Complexity: The guidelines appear overly complex and, at times, puritanical or confusing—even inconsistent.
  • Quote: "If I was a cameraman, I'd be a little bit confused." – Ethan (82:09)
• Double standard: Male athletes’ wardrobes and camera angles are rarely policed or sexualized.
• Conclusion: General agreement on common-sense rules (“Don’t zoom in on the genitals”) and allowing female athletes autonomy re: uniforms.

Notable Moments

• Notable Quote: "Let them wear what they want." – Ethan (62:34)
• Recurring Joke: “Men of Culture” Meme—a wink at mutual understanding among those (male fans) seeking these shots.

8. Male Athletes: Wardrobe Malfunction & Injury Fails (71:05–117:15)

• Discussion then spirals into clips of male pole vaulters suffering graphic and painful groin injuries—both in competition and slow motion.
• Viral fails: Reviewing infamous moments of athletes hitting themselves or being hit by equipment, resulting in testicular injury (with a notable BYU student who required 18 stitches).
  • Quote: “I started screaming to my dad...about my scrotum, that there was a hole in it.” – Athlete, news clip (103:32)
• Point made: Male wardrobe mishaps are rarely sexualized—if anything, they highlight a double standard.

9. UFO/Alien Segment (118:10–137:44)

• Pentagon UAP (UFO) Release: The team reviews the latest batch of “evidence”—old, grainy, and inconclusive.
• Skepticism reigns: The group mockingly dismisses blurry photos, “infrared butthole” videos, and Bob Lazar’s claims of element 115.
  • Quote: “If aliens were actually cruising around the Earth, there’d be way more obvious signs.” – Ethan (126:51)
• Comedic conclusion: The only way Earth’s been visited is probably by robots—crew wants "real evidence, not this grainy stuff."

10. News & Viral Clips:

Chuck Schumer “Fartgate” (192:39–197:18)

• The moment: Senator Schumer apparently farts (very audibly) during a televised press conference.
• Crew reaction: The team analyzes the audio, waveform, and his expression, ultimately declaring it "definitely a fart."
  • Quote: "That confirms it." – Nate (197:13)

Porta Potty Man (181:43–189:07)

• Story: Firefighters rescue a man stuck for eight hours inside a porta potty tank; his excuse was “retrieving a Mountain Dew bottle.”
• Crew theory: He might have a scatological fetish (joked about at length). The segment is simultaneously gross and oddly gripping.

Elderly Person on Airport Conveyor Belt (176:57–177:47)

• Clip: A senior accidentally rides the baggage conveyor at the airport, resigning herself and lying back as handlers rush to help.

Blue Angels Airshow Mishap (178:07–181:43)

• Clip: Jet flyover at an airshow causes debris and panic on a crowded beach; their captain later calls the maneuver "unsafe."

“Gay or Gamer?” Meme (199:09–200:20)

• Street interviews: People reportedly almost uniformly choose to be gay rather than a gamer.
  • Quote: “Just going to prove that the most oppressed minority in this country is now gamers.” – Jeremy (200:14)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Ethan, on new camera rules:
  “It seems like the rules, if I could just summarize it, is like don’t zoom in on the genitals...which is good.” (55:07)

• Gabe, on Taco Bell:
  “I had severe diarrhea for like a few days.” (11:39)

• Ethan, on uniform policy:
  “Let them wear what they want.” (62:34)

• Dr. Candice:
  “I think that b**** got Covid in the coochie.” (37:06)

• After pole vault segment:
  “I don’t got enough dick for OnlyFans, bro.” (116:59)

• Ethan, on Chuck Schumer’s fart:
  “If this episode gets yellowed, I know that the cursing is bleep, so hopefully it doesn’t matter, right? Yeah, there’s a lot of F bombs.” (158:15)
  (and in reference to the “fartgate,” repeated analysis and satisfaction from whole cast)

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Important Timestamps

• 00:03 – Show intro, "frozen solid meat" meme starts
• 03:06–07:07 – Rocky trailer/member stream debate, biographical myths
• 08:38–13:43 – Gabe’s McDonald's review, explosive diarrhea news
• 20:11–24:49 – H3 puzzle unboxing & merch shill
• 25:02–28:07 – Shambhala festival discussion
• 28:58–37:43 – Dr. Candice YouTube activist drama
• 45:32–71:53 – Main segment: European guidelines, women athletes, objectification in sports
• 71:05–117:15 – Male pole vault fails, groin injury stories, BYU scrotum survivor
• 118:10–137:44 – UFO segment, Bob Lazar, government “evidence,” alien skepticism
• 176:57–177:47 – Elderly person on airport conveyor belt
• 181:43–189:07 – Porta potty man & fire department rescue
• 192:39–197:18 – Chuck Schumer “fartgate,” cast vote
• 199:09–200:20 – "Gay or gamer?" meme

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Listener/Caller Highlights

• Gabe’s burger/lettuce review, several live callers (including tattoo artist Tatted By Georgie), audience-provided anecdotes about cheerleading uniforms and track meets.
• Listeners sound in via Super Chats: on clothing, fast food, UFOs, latke recipes, and more.

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Tone and Style

The episode is frank, sarcastic, and irreverently funny with a knack for finding hilarity in news, pop culture, and bodily malfunctions. Audience interaction is genuine and the crew frequently riffs off each other for comedic effect. The “frozen solid meat” phrase embodies the episode's spirit: absurd, meme-friendly, and ever-referential to internet culture.

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Summary Takeaway

Episode #286 is a classic H3 Show: mix of insightful social commentary (on sexism and sports), slapstick news, body-focused humor, meme recycling, and a very participatory crowd. By episode’s end, titillation has given way to exasperation, and the only “meat” left is...frozen solid.

Transcript

[Ethan Klein]

Hello, everybody. Welcome to Friday's stage three show. Coming at you. It's July 17th. Beautiful, sunny, hot Los Angeles, California. Coming at you. I wish the meat was frozen solid, but it's hot out here. That is, of course, a meme generated from the member stream that actually, you know, it's a shame that a lot of you guys didn't see yesterday's member stream because I think that that that soundbite might have some serious legs.

[Dan]

It's got legs. And they ain't frozen.

[Ethan Klein]

No, they are not, sir. In fact, I think what we can do to bring the general audience. And by the way, thank you to Cozy Earth for sponsoring us today. God bless them. Love my Cozy Earth. We should pull from the trailer. It's from the Rocky. Sylvester Stallone biopic. You guys know how I feel about biopics. But in the trailer, can we just timestamp that one moment so that we could bring people into the fold? On. The meat is frozen solid.

[Gabe]

The meat's frozen solid because it's.

[Ethan Klein]

So you're gonna be hearing it a lot, right? Frozen solid meat. It's just. I know. It was. It was a big moment for us. Also, I want to say I got a light. So now check this out. You guys aren't gonna see it, but I will. I was just flashing. Somebody just gave up. When somebody's on the line, it'll fl. Oh, you see that? Let's see who's calling. Hello, this is Ethan speaking.

[Caller (Various)]

Holy fucking shit. Hello, Ethan.

[Ethan Klein]

Hi, how are you? How can I help you today?

[Caller (Various)]

I. I'm just. I'm kind of stunned right now.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay, fantastic. Well, thanks for ringing in there. I appreciate you. Have a great. Have a great weekend. Oh, thank you so much. You guys hear that? Appreciate you. Bye. Bye.

[Caller (Various)]

Genuine.

[Ethan Klein]

She says I'm hilarious and she loves me. If you guys heard that, but. Oh, that's nice. Little. Little self esteem boost. What's that face? Tomorrow. You don't think that I'm hilarious, but I'm another call. Let's see what they. Let's see if they agree.

[Hila Klein]

Hi.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, what the fuck? They hung up, huh? All right, well, anyway, if you call in now, I'll. I'll see a flashing light, so I'll have no more faux pap pas.

[Dan]

There was a noise that went off, but Dan pulled it out. But it was very funny. It would have just been way too much of an interruption to the show.

[Ethan Klein]

What are you talking about?

[Dan]

There was a noise. When that light came on, it was like a ringer.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, for real?

[Jeremy]

Yeah. That light had, like a ringer built into it.

[Ethan Klein]

Hear it?

[Jeremy]

No, I ripped it out. I ripped the speaker out.

[Ethan Klein]

Sometimes that's what it takes.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, that was the easiest fix.

[Ethan Klein]

And that while Hila's here. Thank you, Hyla.

[Gabe]

You don't.

[Ethan Klein]

You probably. Did you see them? The meat is frozen solid. The meat's frozen solid. Okay, so here I'm pulling. So this happened yesterday on Members.

[Hila Klein]

Okay.

[Ethan Klein]

It was a very fun episode, by the way. Thanks for being there, all the members. We had a lot of fun. One of my favorite thing to do on Members, actually these days is watching trailers, because I love reacting to trailers. And these dumb idiots are trying to promote their fucking movie and then they claim you for showing a trailer, right? So I watch it on Members. And so check this out, this scene here. I don't know what's. I don't know what's going on, but he's doing like.

[Jeremy]

Well, it's a famous scene from the movie from Rocky.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, the meat is frozen solid.

[Jeremy]

No, not him injuring himself, but him practicing in a meatlock.

[Ethan Klein]

So it's meta. This is about Sylvester, right? This comes with some strengths. So this is about Sylvester doing promo for Rocky, and he had ops in real life, apparently. And so he was going to punch the meat as it. As it is. Beat the meat.

[Jeremy]

Wait, no, no, no, no, no.

[Gabe]

Nothing like that at all.

[Harley]

In Rocky, he trains on the meat.

[Ethan Klein]

I know that in this, he's shooting

[Jeremy]

a scene from the movie.

[Ethan Klein]

Froze the meat to fudge with him.

[Kate]

No. Yeah, he had a.

[Harley]

No.

[Kate]

What?

[Ethan Klein]

So much going on with you.

[Jeremy]

I like that concept that he was being sabotaged, but I think it's just that they. They were irresponsible and just didn't check to see because they were in such a rush.

[Ethan Klein]

That's on him. That's his fucking.

[Jeremy]

No, it's his fault.

[Ethan Klein]

What do you mean?

[Hila Klein]

Just taking it another step further.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, because I just gave him too much credit. I was like.

[Jeremy]

Well, your explanation is very funny.

[Ethan Klein]

I like the idea. What didn't sabotage him?

[Jeremy]

Well, I haven't seen the movie yet, so maybe you're right.

[Ethan Klein]

People were rooting against him.

[Harley]

No, I think they. I think I. I saw somewhere that. In real life. Yeah, because he was in a rush. A lot of the scenes, they had one take and he had to just go through it. Like, he had, like. There's a scene where he's running and he was like, chasing a car for a half hour. A lot of those scenes he was just on such a.

[Jeremy]

It's just like it was just an onset debacle from being rushed.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, we'll have to. We'll have to find out.

[Jeremy]

I guess we'll find out when we see him.

[Ethan Klein]

I personally like the espionage angle.

[Jeremy]

I really like that. But that's phenology angle too, because it

[Ethan Klein]

didn't really make sense to me otherwise. It's just so dumb. But anyway, so here it is. Hila. So here he's shooting this scene where he's punching the meat. Except they forgot to defrost the meat.

[Gabe]

The meat's frozen solid.

[Hila Klein]

I mean, that would hurt.

[Gabe]

The meat's frozen solid.

[Ethan Klein]

They're gonna kick it to the one day. I don't know. Hold on. Don't play it, Zach. It's behind schedule.

[Gabe]

The meat's frozen solid.

[Ethan Klein]

It sounds stupid.

[Hila Klein]

I don't know. Why did that catch you guys so much?

[Ethan Klein]

It's so stupid. Did you hear the.

[Harley]

The line? The line before then was talking about the schedule.

[Ethan Klein]

What's that?

[Harley]

The line before then was talking about the shooting schedule.

[Jeremy]

Yes, exactly. It was like if you fall one

[Gabe]

day behind, one day behind schedule, the

[Ethan Klein]

beat is frozen solid. What an idiot. Though you didn't check the meat was thawed. Who just punches meat? Frozen meat. Full frozen meat. And also, he sounds so dumb. The accent is so bad. No, it's so good. I mean, it's so stupid, granted, but also so good. One day behind schedule. The meat is frozen solid. You ever fall one day behind schedule?

[Gabe]

The meat's frozen solid.

[Ethan Klein]

Apparently he really injured his hand. What a idiot. Bro,

[Gabe]

the meat's frozen.

[Ethan Klein]

It's frozen solid.

[Hila Klein]

Okay, so that's actually in the trailer? Yes, they thought that was so.

[Ethan Klein]

Yes, they. And they edited in the line so they like went out of their way to include that great line.

[Hila Klein]

Okay, wow.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

So

[Harley]

I'm seeing that Sylvester Stallone actually permanently damaged his joints and flattened his knuckles from the original beef packing scene.

[Ethan Klein]

Again, I don't buy it.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, we are.

[Ethan Klein]

This guy is full of lies. And that's another thing we established. There's like a story about how he sold his dog for $40 and then bought it back for 30,000 or something. And I was like, what? I honestly don't believe that. I think that is just a made up story. And now he's saying he shattered his fucking fist in 20 places from a hidden frozen meat. I mean, come on, bro.

[Harley]

I found out yesterday that Sly is not involved with this film behind scale.

[Ethan Klein]

Really?

[Harley]

Yeah, he's not.

[Ethan Klein]

But did he give it his blessings?

[Harley]

No, he said that he didn't. He Said what?

[Ethan Klein]

Why would they want to make it without him?

[Harley]

He said that he didn't. And the director said he's misremembering because I did ask and he didn't want to be part of it, so.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, he changed his mind. So what? What? You still make misremembering.

[Gabe]

Hey, I didn't want to be part of that movie. I forgot I didn't want to be in that movie.

[Dan]

Broke my hand.

[Gabe]

Hey,

[Ethan Klein]

so anyway, listen to his. The voice this guy puts on. Because it's so stupid, bro. It's so dumb name. Wait, there's one in. Where he's like in the kitchen and you really feel how stupid it is.

[Caller (Various)]

Let me see.

[Ethan Klein]

I think it's maybe here.

[Kate]

There's the Einstein line.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I may not look like Einstein. That's Forrest Gump. Yeah, that was definitely. I might not look like Einstein, but I do have. I do. Oh, that's what I need. Where are you, gabe?

[Gabe]

I'm at McDonald's trying a new sandwich.

[Ethan Klein]

But you're at McDonald's.

[Jeremy]

That looks like a classic McDonald's.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. What the hell?

[Gabe]

It's a. It's like a quarter pounder deluxe.

[Hila Klein]

Okay.

[Gabe]

Back in the day, they used to call it the Big and Tasty, which is good.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, I. With the Big and Tasty.

[Hila Klein]

What's in it? What's. Wait, wait, you're eating lettuce? Don't eat lettuce.

[Ethan Klein]

No, he's Big and tasty. He's. This is the Big and taste. Bring it up.

[Harley]

Right.

[Jeremy]

It's the explosive diarrhea. Comes from lettuce.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, oh, oh. Well, hold on.

[Gabe]

Oh, no.

[Ethan Klein]

We just saw it happen in real time. Wait, so what is the update with the explosive diarrhea?

[Hila Klein]

Because I heard they were updates because I.

[Ethan Klein]

They're honing it. Yeah, those people who haven't follows. There's been a epidemic of explosive diarrhea. And it start and like serious. Right. It started where they're like, don't eat any produce at all. And then it was like, don't eat berries or lettuce. And now last I heard, they says they're almost certain it's lettuce and they're honing in on it. Have they figured out where the explosive diarrhea is coming from? Can we eat lettuce?

[Jeremy]

I'm looking at an article that was published six hours ago to. To find out. So I'll let you know in a sec.

[Ethan Klein]

I'll let you know, Gabe.

[Hila Klein]

We're going to get a live Report.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, yeah. Gabe's not slowing down though. And why should he repeat sake.

[Hila Klein]

What's done is done.

[Ethan Klein]

Can you show me that fancy, like, burger sign on the wall behind you? Because I thought that was the other way. The other way.

[Dan]

This is a McDonald's?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. Why does that look so nice? Say PNB, delicious burger. That's such a funny, like, thing to write on the wall of McDonald's. That's like a live laugh. Love.

[Gabe]

Also Encino.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, yeah, there you go. That's a nice spot. Can I get some? Fuck yes for McDonald's, baby?

[David]

Woo.

[Gabe]

Fuck yeah, baby. McDonald's, baby.

[Ethan Klein]

We fucking love McDonald's, baby.

[Nate]

Let's order some.

[Ethan Klein]

I know. I kind of want. You want to.

[Nate]

I. Dude, I'm literally looking at Uber right now.

[Ethan Klein]

I want it big and tasty.

[Gabe]

All right. Caught the quarter pound of deluxe now.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, wait, that's been on the menu, Gabe, hasn't it?

[Gabe]

I haven't seen that yet.

[Nate]

No, it's right. It's new.

[Ethan Klein]

Is everybody enjoying their meal there? Nice one, love.

[Gabe]

Looks like it.

[Hila Klein]

Oh, the tomato is falling.

[Ethan Klein]

The meat. How's the meat? How's the meat? I'm telling you, this thing has legs. Yeah.

[Jeremy]

So late Thursday, the CDC identified lettuce from Mexico served by Taco Bell locations across five US States as the source of the widespread outbreak.

[Ethan Klein]

There it is. It's Taco Bell.

[Gabe]

Taco Bell. I had. I had severe diarrhea from Taco Bell last time I ate it.

[Ethan Klein]

Wait, when was that?

[Hila Klein]

Hopefully not recently.

[Kate]

That was.

[Gabe]

That was like a year and a half ago. I had Taco Bell.

[Ethan Klein]

More the same.

[Gabe]

I had severe diarrhea for like a few days.

[Ethan Klein]

Severe.

[Hila Klein]

So this new ones, they can last a few weeks. Can you imagine that?

[Jeremy]

Weeks?

[Harley]

Yep. It says abnormally large number of cases in Michigan.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, and New York. It was basically New York and Michigan that got slammed with the diarrhea.

[Harley]

Oh, where two of your employees were at Grievous.

[Hila Klein]

Oh, God. Did you guys ate Taco Bell?

[Harley]

We did.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, actually.

[Harley]

Holy.

[Hila Klein]

Wait, so how do you feel?

[Ethan Klein]

I feel okay.

[Harley]

The first.

[Gabe]

This is.

[Harley]

This is.

[Ethan Klein]

Elena's suspicious. You can have it.

[Harley]

The first night we got back, I got Taco Bell, actually.

[Hila Klein]

I'm so terrified of this.

[Harley]

When I was at the office without you that night.

[David]

Oh, right.

[Caller (Various)]

Okay.

[Ethan Klein]

So we can eat. You can eat the lettuce.

[Hila Klein]

Just so I can eat berries?

[Ethan Klein]

Yes, you can eat berries. That's what I was trying to tell you.

[Hila Klein]

Thank God.

[Ethan Klein]

Hila. Got Teddy so paranoid. We have berries growing in our backyard and he's like, we can't E them. I'm like, teddy, it's in our backyard. We know where it came from. Coming from the earth in our backyard. But everybody, don't panic. You said it. You said it, son. Also, I was late. Sorry. Well, I wasn't late. I knew I was going to start. An hour later, I was participating in a. Basically a call regarding next week again, which is Oliver's memorial taking place at UC Santa Cruz that me and Hil will be there participating in. Very honored and Very honored to be included in that project. And so that takes place. I was wrong. So It's Saturday, Saturday 7. So for some reason, they sent me like a call sheet or something. I thought it said like 7 to 8, but it's 7 to 9. So it's two hours long.

[Harley]

Right.

[Ethan Klein]

So it's 7pm Damn. Gabe's getting in that. That next bite looks sloppy. Let me see it.

[Gabe]

Falling apart.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[Hila Klein]

Oh, man.

[Ethan Klein]

Go for it. Just go for it like nobody's watching.

[Nate]

That's the best part right there.

[Hila Klein]

That's the best part. Got all the juices.

[Jeremy]

Juice is flowing.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, nice touch. Oh, that was. That was a cute little maneuver with the pinky. Yeah, you didn't want to get it

[Gabe]

there, but it's gonna fall down. Yeah, I don't want to fall down. And then it's freezing.

[Ethan Klein]

Frozen solid. Meet you the me. So that is on Saturday, 7pm and me and Hilo will be. So we're doing a show on Wednesday.

[Hila Klein]

Wednesday would be the last.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay. And then Thursday we're gonna be members. The crew members. Thank you, Gu. And Friday will be After Dark. After dark taking over. And then that evening, tune into the. I'll show you.

[Jeremy]

Not that evening. Saturday.

[Hila Klein]

Saturday.

[Ethan Klein]

Not that evening. Strike that. I'll be sending out the link and itinerary.

[Hila Klein]

Listen to Ethan on schedule stuff ever.

[Ethan Klein]

I'll be informing you guys when. And I'll be sharing the link, I'm sure when the time approaches. So that's what I. That's what I was doing. And. Well, Gabe, what are you drinking on. What are you sipping on there?

[Gabe]

Diet Coke.

[Ethan Klein]

Good for you.

[Gabe]

Diet Coke.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[Gabe]

So D.C. call it D.C. diet.

[Jeremy]

Love a. Love a cold D.C. yeah, but you

[Ethan Klein]

prefer a Diet Coke over a Coke Zero or whatever.

[Gabe]

I prefer a Coke Zero because they

[Ethan Klein]

have Coke Zero at McDonald's, Gabe.

[Jeremy]

They do?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[Nate]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

I didn't know that.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. And it's fantastic.

[Nate]

It's really good.

[Ethan Klein]

It's fantastic. Ben.

[Gabe]

I don't think so.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, they.

[Jeremy]

I don't See it.

[Ethan Klein]

Wait, wait. What? Damn.

[Nate]

You just proved you.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. What?

[Gabe]

They don't have it here.

[Jeremy]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[Nate]

What?

[Hila Klein]

Oh, my God. Okay.

[Nate]

Chick fil A or something.

[Ethan Klein]

What? I thought because. Because they got the Coke. The Coke cereal really has been getting around. I usually get Diet Dr. Pepper at McDonald's because you can't. You don't really find that anywhere is good. It sure is, Gabe. So what'd you. So you just kicked back the burger? Did you get fries or anything?

[Gabe]

No, just a burger. Yeah, just a burger.

[Ethan Klein]

Is that enough for you?

[Gabe]

Yeah, it's good for me right now. Should last me the whole day.

[Ethan Klein]

How to do the hamburger. You ever make a hamburger with your dick and balls?

[Nate]

Dick and your balls.

[Gabe]

That'll be a new one. Yeah, a Dicky Burger. We'll call it a Dickie Burger.

[Ethan Klein]

You know, I. I don't know. I think. I don't know if it's like the snob in me because I. I did it growing up as a kid and I didn't have a problem, but for me, like, there's something. It's just me. But sitting and eating inside of a McDonald's to me feels very strange. Dude. Does anybody know what I mean? Like, I would rather be caught dead

[Kate]

than, like, why aren't you?

[Hila Klein]

Just.

[Ethan Klein]

Just sit in my car, drive through.

[Jeremy]

I think they're a little bit nicer in there nowadays.

[Hila Klein]

I don't have that feeling about it.

[Nate]

It depends on the area.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, but when's the last time you ate in a McDonald's? Hila.

[Hila Klein]

I mean, I don't. I rarely eat anywhere outside.

[Ethan Klein]

You don't get the feeling because you don't know what it's like.

[Dan]

I feel like there's a sense of shame that goes.

[Ethan Klein]

There is. I don't want to say there is. It's shameful. It's shameful. I won.

[Nate]

I ate in a Carl's Jr.

[Gabe]

At

[Nate]

least I was sitting in there with, like, a bunch of old people.

[Ethan Klein]

And so strange.

[Nate]

Like, people who sit there all day. So they order one or two items and then they sit there for hours. Multiple people.

[Hila Klein]

Like the time pause when you walked in.

[Nate]

Oh, my God, for real. And everything was so shitty and bad.

[Ethan Klein]

I still love Carl's Jr. As a kid.

[Nate]

Sometimes you just gotta experience, like, weird vibes. Like, that's why I do it personally. It's good times.

[Gabe]

I still like it, like in the 90s when their burgers are really good, they make, like, really kind of more mystique. And then the fries. Yeah, we're acting now. They Changed the formula. They're different now that the fries.

[Ethan Klein]

Can you give me a 360 spin of this McDonald's you're at?

[Gabe]

Sure.

[Ethan Klein]

I just want to see what you're working with here. Yeah, Yeah. I mean, there's. There's a. Not too many people. That's about right. Just enough that it's awkward, you know?

[Nate]

Yeah, definitely.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, God bless you, man. The meat. I think I'm gonna get McDonald's right now. Because you're just such. You're such an innovator and you inspire me. So. So I should ask for a big.

[Nate]

They have another new burger.

[Ethan Klein]

What?

[Nate]

The Caesar chicken sandwich?

[Hila Klein]

Some sort.

[Ethan Klein]

This is burger. It's. Well, burger. It's not a burger. Yeah, it's got to be.

[Gabe]

It's got to be me.

[Nate]

In Europe, actually, we call it the chicken stuff.

[Jeremy]

It's all burger.

[Gabe]

I try to find. There's a new burger they had. It used to be. It's like the Big Mac Arch or something. Yeah, I try to look for it. I don't think they have it here, the meat.

[Ethan Klein]

All right, Gabe, have a great weekend. All right, buddy. Appreciate you.

[Gabe]

Have a great one, Ethan.

[Ethan Klein]

I love you, Uncle Gabe. You're the best. And everybody go, go. Give some love to Uncle Gabe on cameo, eh? Keep this, man. Keep the burgers flowing. Am I right or what?

[Gabe]

Look.

[Ethan Klein]

Yep, you said it, brother. Am I right or wrong? You're not wrong. Okie doke. Say you're not wrong.

[Gabe]

What trick you gonna get?

[Ethan Klein]

I'm gonna get what you had. Which is the meat. The Quarter Pounder Deluxe.

[Gabe]

Excellent.

[Ethan Klein]

Coke zero. With the light on the ice. Saikuno broke the eyes there for us. All right, Gabe, you be good out there, okay, bud? Appreciate you.

[Gabe]

Have a great weekend, Ethan.

[Ethan Klein]

All right, you too, buddy.

[Gabe]

I wish you the best.

[Ethan Klein]

I wish you the best.

[Gabe]

All the best.

[Ethan Klein]

All the best.

[Jeremy]

Thanks, Gabo.

[Hila Klein]

Only the best.

[Ethan Klein]

Only the best. Oh, also, yeah, thank you. This is the unisex K eth shirt that we've been promising.

[Hila Klein]

Yes, you guys asked and we delivered.

[Ethan Klein]

Tell them where to get it.

[Hila Klein]

And it looks great. So please head on over to h3h3shop.com. And I'm doing it too. And check out the puzzle. Did you guys talk about the puzzle?

[Ethan Klein]

No.

[Hila Klein]

Oh, my God. Okay, we have a new puzzle. Oh, wait, that's all the photos we have. Wait, I gotta show it here.

[Ethan Klein]

So this is up for our member. Our VIP deluxe members.

[Hila Klein]

This does not do it justice. Okay.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, God, this is a boring clip.

[David]

I thought we had a better.

[Ethan Klein]

No no, no, no, no. Next time. Hey, docket team, bro. Give me the meat of the clip. What you got? They can only see the side of it. Oh, top shot. No, we don't.

[Law Enforcement Narrator]

We didn't.

[Ethan Klein]

Get rid of it right here. Dan's got to maneuver it.

[Jeremy]

You could just do that.

[Ethan Klein]

There you go.

[Gabe]

Wow.

[Ethan Klein]

Here, I'll hold it up real close. So, guys, this is available for 2 days, 48 hours to our VIP Deluxe members. You also get 20 off the COD sent in the Discord Group, Dan or the Community tab. So everyone who's a member of this deluxe exclusive tier will get access to this, and I think it's gonna sell out fast. So you are my favorite.

[Kate]

I'm a big fan of this puzzle. I love this art that's on here.

[Ethan Klein]

You can see it here.

[Kate]

It's like jam packed with replicas from the show. I just think it's great.

[Ethan Klein]

Is this. Am I correct? This seems higher quality than the actual preview. What is. What is that? Is that regular?

[Caller (Various)]

What?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, I'm saying on. What they're seeing is lower res than what I'm seeing. I don't know. Google it. Anyway, here's the puzzle. And, yeah, it's just jam packed full of beautiful, lovely H3 references. It's basically where's Waldo? H3 style. And this is. This is great. So you're gonna love this.

[Jeremy]

I found you. I see you. That was really easy. You said, it's like, where's Waldo? I saw you immediately.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, I'm not Walt. Who says I'm Waldo?

[Jeremy]

Oh, who are you supposed to be finding? Because you're right there, right under your mouse. That's Ethan. Hila. Right in the middle. Yeah. My eye was immediately drawn to it.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. Well, I said Waldo. You gotta find Waldo.

[Nate]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

Oh, is Waldo in here?

[Ethan Klein]

I guess.

[Jeremy]

Okay, I. I moved it.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, you have a checklist. Look, show them the inside checklist. It's here. You know, you can see where it's pointing.

[Jeremy]

I know. I adjusted it.

[Nate]

It's upside down, bro.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, my God.

[Nate]

Sake.

[Hila Klein]

A lot of.

[Kate]

A lot of thought went into.

[Ethan Klein]

Do we not have a picture of

[Kate]

the Inside the checklist?

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, my God. Well, not a lot of thought went into presenting it.

[Kate]

That's true.

[Nate]

Definitely not.

[Hila Klein]

So the box is really cool. Comes with a poster.

[Ethan Klein]

Wow. What a value.

[Nate]

Yeah, but don't look at the poster, because it's cheating.

[Ethan Klein]

No, it's not.

[Nate]

Notice.

[Kate]

No, it's not.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, he's right. It's cheating if you take.

[Harley]

Yeah. If you take making puzzles serious, it is Cheating.

[Nate]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Wait.

[Nate]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Anyway you can see. I'll read it to you. It says, a friend of Blippi, a maternal grandma's paintbrush. 14 pages. A man who's a surgeon. There's a whole bunch of them. A sleepy hawk. Tua knowledge. A regular shmegula, et cetera, et cetera. There's a whole bunch of them. It's so great. So pile in here and get them. I think they're gonna sell out probably even before it reaches the general public in two days. So thank you to Elon. What a great piece of memorabilia there, eh?

[Kate]

And shout out to the artist who is a. A viewer of this show.

[Hila Klein]

The artist on Instagram is called Vronkmum.

[Ethan Klein]

Here they are, Vronkman, Bronkman and. Oh yeah, you can see the post here. So we, we could. There's a link to their page on the shop page if you want to check them out. But yeah, really amazing work by them. So very cool. Thank you. How exciting. I might, you know, I might even put that puzzle together, you know, do.

[Hila Klein]

Right now.

[Ethan Klein]

I mean, I haven't done a puzzle on. God knows.

[Nate]

Do it now.

[Jeremy]

Right now.

[Kate]

Speed. Run it.

[Gabe]

See, the report is on the screen now.

[Ethan Klein]

Sure, I will. There's nothing in it. There's nothing in it. Guys, are we selling empty puzzles? Is this a puzzle for ghosts?

[Nate]

Oh, it's not. It's just the box. We're selling the box right now because

[Hila Klein]

we built that one. But the other one. Open. The other one.

[Ethan Klein]

It's closed, it's locked. I don't want to. I don't want to reduce the value of it.

[Hila Klein]

No, you can.

[Ethan Klein]

I don't want to reduce the value.

[Hila Klein]

Okay.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, so that's what's going on. Shambhala is next week. Ab. How you feeling?

[Harley]

Excited, Nervous?

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Harley]

I'm in a group chat with Harley and this other dude and it's already been very interesting.

[Ethan Klein]

Who's the other dude? I mean, you don't have to give me if it's. What is he?

[Harley]

He is going to drive us there and Harley sends me a picture of him while he's in the group chat. He goes, by the way, this is what he looks like.

[Ethan Klein]

Is it crazy?

[Harley]

He's. I'll say. He looks like he likes Shambhala.

[Ethan Klein]

Show me off camera so I can just see. What does he look like to you, love?

[Jeremy]

He's a character.

[Nate]

He belongs.

[Jeremy]

He definitely belongs in Shambhala.

[Nate]

He belongs.

[Ethan Klein]

Shambhala coated. Let me see, let me see what a Shambhala coated gentleman looks like, oh, yeah. Well, he looks like he might be a Juggalo. You know what I mean?

[Nate]

He looks like Lil Sam, but if

[Ethan Klein]

he's friends with Harley, he's got. He's probably chilled, right?

[Harley]

Harley just said show him the guy's picture, so.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay, we can show it.

[Harley]

All right. Yeah,

[Ethan Klein]

Harley said. Well, Harley said. I'm assuming he knows.

[Harley]

Yeah, he just sent me. It's funny. He just sent me another picture and he goes, I look like this now. So he's keeping me updated.

[Ethan Klein]

But I heard you had to hike there. You can drive there.

[Harley]

Yeah, you have to drive. I think it's a. It's a while too.

[Ethan Klein]

You drive and then hike.

[Harley]

I don't even know. I'm just.

[Ethan Klein]

You're just there. Okay.

[Harley]

Yeah, I'm just tagging along.

[Nate]

Yeah. Yeah. So, yeah, we should put a apple tag on Navy so we don't lose him.

[Harley]

Yeah, maybe I'll swallow one.

[Ethan Klein]

Here is this gentleman that's going to be your Sherpa. He's going to take you up the mountain and ensure your safety.

[Nate]

I wouldn't trust him.

[Ethan Klein]

This guy with 999 tattooed under his left eye. Of course, an upside down 666.

[Harley]

Yeah. So that was a few nights ago. I just sent you what he sent me, like, 20 minutes ago.

[Nate]

Are those marshmallow tattoos, like, on his hands there? Smiley?

[Ethan Klein]

I don't know. But here, if you're looking to meet him, maybe he says, this is what I look like now. So when you're looking for this guy, look for someone that looks like this here.

[Harley]

I told him, I responded. I said, if you go. Scroll down. I said, thank you. Please keep us updated on what he looks like. Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, in case it changes, what, in like three days?

[Harley]

I mean, he sent me. I look like this now. So. Yeah, I just.

[Ethan Klein]

So on the same day. Have him do another one. I look like this now.

[Nate]

What's he driving? He's driving some sort of truck.

[Ethan Klein]

Like a school bus?

[Nate]

Yeah, possibly.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, anyway, I'm very excited for you. I think you're gonna have a time of a life, a time of a lifetime.

[Harley]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

You're gonna have a roll of a lifetime. Ah, so exciting for you.

[Nate]

I'm worried.

[Ethan Klein]

I don't know why everyone's worried. It's a music fester. There's tons of people there. Well, I've seen thousands and thousands of people.

[Harley]

I've seen a lot of people saying it's like a rape. Like, it's like a rave on, like, pro level. So it's Interesting. If it's your first time.

[Ethan Klein]

But everybody's gotta have a first time.

[Jeremy]

Look, you've never been to a rave before, like at all?

[Harley]

Not really.

[Jeremy]

Interesting. You're definitely jumping into the deep end.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, I got that. Look at this. This is a massive event, you know? I mean.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, no, for sure. It's just it. It's in a super remote location. It's like a campout rave. You know, most people's first rave is like at a warehouse. And it's one night. This is in the middle of nowhere. And it's like six nights or something.

[Ethan Klein]

Three. July 24 to 27. So that'd be what, four nights?

[Jeremy]

Four nights.

[Harley]

There you go.

[Ethan Klein]

Four holy nights.

[Jeremy]

Is it even restricted to night? I mean, it might be like a. There might be activities going on 247.

[Harley]

Yeah, there's stuff during the day.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, I would imagine so. So, yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Bob. Oh my God. Bob Dylan is headlining.

[Nate]

Oh, nice.

[Dan]

He needs the gig.

[Ethan Klein]

He's having a tough time out there. E. Very excited for you. Harley gets into some weird shit, man. Yeah, we'll see. Yeah. Dr. Candice. Yes. So, okay, so Dr. Candace. This was from Wednesday's show. These incredible two activists that like just chase around drama and basically make content of them rebuking them. And they were talking about the teacher that was already fired.

[Gabe]

Dripping down butt naked, bending over and showing everything on the video. And all you could see was cellulite hanging in pubic hat.

[Ethan Klein]

You know what I realized? This is the guy I've been doing an impression of my whole time. And she's just taking out her hands

[Gabe]

over and pulls down her back pennies.

[Ethan Klein]

And I could smell that nasty from here. Boy, so vulgar. Anyway, so somebody actually on the subreddit says, careful, do not praise Candace and friends. She stalks and doxed me, threatened to have my dog taken. Mocked my birth defect. Sorry. And caused the police to falsely arrest people. I mean, that sounds like. That sounds like her MO Sounds like good content. Exactly. Are we. Did we reach out to them to call in? I know that was something we discussed.

[Nate]

Now we're gonna surprise ambush you with them.

[Ethan Klein]

I can. I can handle that. I cut three videos together and made it short. There's much online if you type her name. And my name is Eric Sanchez. I didn't know this lady. Her friend Grizzy employed her to come attack me. We. So she does so people can put like a hit on someone and send her after them.

[Nate]

We should put a hit on you.

[Ethan Klein]

Like send them.

[Nate]

I saw someone say There was just 200 bucks for the hit.

[Ethan Klein]

Actually, you could. You sent them on. Anybody show up and yell at you?

[Jeremy]

No, they'll.

[Nate]

They'll make a press conference like this

[Ethan Klein]

and make up lies about in our parking lot.

[Gabe]

I'm not lying. I'm telling what's on the video.

[Ethan Klein]

Let's try that.

[Nate]

So funny.

[Ethan Klein]

No, it wouldn't be. They would get. Trust me, it wouldn't be funny. I would love it. We have court next month for the protective order. I got to keep my family safe. She's currently attacking the judge that was assigned to the case before they recused themselves and she made a fake hoax of a girl being trafficked and tried to point the finger at me. Wow. This lady is bad. Please Google her. You don't have to take my word for it. I really don't want to put my face out there, but she put me all over the Internet already, so it doesn't matter anymore. Can't get a regular job now because people believe this stuff she made up about me because they won't look it up themselves, which sounds like a lawsuit. And I'm a normal guy, not a public figure. That makes the lawsuit all that much more likely to succeed. Right? But let's see. Here's a compilation that they put together first. There you were there. You, Candace and Kristen were there.

[Hila Klein]

Information.

[Ethan Klein]

But you were there.

[Kate]

You were there.

[Ethan Klein]

You're on my. My audio footage, my video footage.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Okay.

[David]

I'm like.

[Ethan Klein]

Because we already pull Jennifer Stank, Cat Knighton, and Eric Dirty Sanchez ho card. This woman's a. I thought she was a woman of God in front and center.

[Kate]

And we know you ain't going to

[David]

go over there and do a degree.

[Ethan Klein]

What's up, weak ass? Yeah, I'm talking to you for what I'm doing. Oh, this. This person is some deep beef with her. It looks like they're blitzing each other.

[David]

You know who I am?

[Ethan Klein]

You know who I am. Oh, my God.

[Dan]

I got approval for the charges for

[Ethan Klein]

harassment and to go ahead and walk this warrant through.

[Nate]

Okay.

[Ethan Klein]

So I'm gonna go ahead and take

[Dan]

that care of that for you.

[Harley]

Okay.

[David]

Thank you, pretty.

[Hila Klein]

There's a demented young man named Eric also. I think he's kind of special.

[Ethan Klein]

I don't know who's talking about who is going on. So the person I don't wrote this post, made a compilation.

[Jeremy]

Yeah. It's so chaotic, but I don't explain at all. Like, why are they, like, what it

[Ethan Klein]

seems like they are. They're having a equal.

[Nate]

Maybe we're just Part of.

[Jeremy]

I think we're getting in between two crazy sets of crazy.

[Ethan Klein]

I'll negotiate you. I will happily negotiate peace between them on this show live. You've never seen me. This is like one of two times when we showed up to Eric's court.

[David]

Yeah, we talking about you with your little funny mouth looking ass. You're going to jail. Go in jail today, partner. You best believe that. You tell your girl Jennifer, she next ugly.

[Ethan Klein]

This girl, she just cruised around talking. That's her job. That's literally her job.

[David]

Lips, you got your ugly.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh my God.

[Nate]

Maybe we should like stick her on James Charles or some like. No, obviously not. No, I get back when you get excited like that because I'm saying it jokingly, but then you take it too serious.

[Ethan Klein]

But yeah, no comment. I was love's idea, not mine. The problem is she might be do illegal things.

[Nate]

Right.

[Ethan Klein]

We wouldn't want that.

[Nate]

I just like the press conference.

[Ethan Klein]

I don't know that I necessarily trust her to do not legal things. Thank you. So she also more content coming from them poopy panties? Press conference. They're apparently Now I'm not 100 sure the context, but they also had a press release outside of this store and somebody's being called out for pooping their pants in this store. So this seems like an important.

[Jeremy]

This actually seems frozen solid.

[Gabe]

The poop is frozen solid.

[Ethan Klein]

So here is this one and it's. Of course it's the two of them.

[David]

Oh. Because these are the draws that this man said.

[Ethan Klein]

You big city something.

[David]

They're left and you ain't come back and get them with your nasty ass. Yeah, that's you. You talking. And you got in your drawers. You don't even know how to wipe your ass.

[Nate]

How did she acquire these?

[Ethan Klein]

Well, so apparently she has someone on the inside that provided. So her story is she left her dirty panties at someone's house and she obtained them from that person.

[Nate]

But I think it's just like a blatant lie. Which is kind of interesting that she's.

[Ethan Klein]

How do you know that?

[Nate]

It seems it's just the most likely explanation.

[Ethan Klein]

I don't know. She gets around, bro.

[Harley]

No idea.

[Ethan Klein]

She's well connected.

[David]

Wipe your ass, ma'.

[Caller (Various)]

Am.

[David]

Are you serious? You over here want to put your point out?

[Jeremy]

She just touched her face with her gloved hand that's holding the covered panties.

[Ethan Klein]

She did that. But don't worry, she did it just with her.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, just near her eye and mouth. No big deal.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, yeah, they don't think too much through These things. Which is why we shouldn't involve her. Because they were in the parking lot of an elementary school talking about inappropriate while talking about how she's got a nasty. And. And like that. So that was inappropriate.

[David]

Are you serious? You over here want to put your mouth on people and don't know how to put a rag to your ass?

[Ethan Klein]

A rag? I don't know who's putting a rag to their ass. That ain't how I do it. That's some like old timey type of ass wiping.

[Harley]

I think she means the rag with the soap.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, yeah, perhaps.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Yeah.

[David]

Okay, baby, you better clean this ass. You better clean together. Cause, baby, this is too much. That man.

[Ethan Klein]

Girl, I think you're doing too much. I'll be honest say this to me.

[David]

That man kept these psyche ass draws that your ass was weighing.

[Ethan Klein]

We needed a mask for this, baby.

[David]

We. This. I think that bitch got Covid in the coochie.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, my God, I love her. Yeah, we do. Unfortunately, we do need them to call in, but I will ask her about you and I'll make sure to confront her and get to the bottom of it. Obviously, if you're a fan of the show, I'm duty bound to defend you.

[Nate]

Duty.

[Ethan Klein]

And not like undies, dirty undies. Duty.

[Hila Klein]

You're duty bound.

[Harley]

Oh, man, I love Covid in the coochie.

[Gabe]

Yeah, duty bound.

[David]

I'm dead. This whole Covid coochie ass. That's the I be talking about. You want to put your mouth on people, you got the right one. And I said what I said I was up here waiting on you.

[Ethan Klein]

This is big city food, so something went down. It sounds like maybe she bit someone in big city food and then pennies and then got dirty undies from their ex.

[Hila Klein]

I feel like you do not want to be on her wrong side.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, hell no.

[Hila Klein]

You do not want.

[Ethan Klein]

Hell no.

[David]

You talking about. You want to bring it to the gym, baby, I'll bring it to the street where it ain't no rule. So where you at, you old crusty coochie looking ass, you gorilla feet.

[Ethan Klein]

Yes, gorilla feet.

[David]

Hygiene having ass. This man gave me this. There's some real.

[Ethan Klein]

I feel like. Yeah, it is fake. The poop's in the wrong place, isn't it?

[Hila Klein]

I feel like she would not be holding it so close to her.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, yeah, they would have burned that. No one would save underwear with active shit inside of it.

[Jeremy]

No, it's evidence tampering with evidence.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, she just threw it.

[Nate]

Okay.

[Ethan Klein]

She's over it. So Dr. Candice Matthews. We gotta get ahold of her and her accomplice, Mr. X. Really look forward to meeting them. And I will, of course, be on the right side of history there and hopefully getting to the bottom of your case. In the meantime, let's thank our wonderful sponsors over at Cozy Earth. I love being cozy. How about you, Hila?

[Hila Klein]

I love Cozy Earth.

[Ethan Klein]

Everybody in our house loves Cozy Earth.

[Gabe]

Yes.

[Ethan Klein]

The kids, the dogs.

[Hila Klein]

The dogs.

[Ethan Klein]

Everybody's fighting for this. Cozy Earth.

[Hila Klein]

And us. But everybody gets it before us.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, we get last dibs on everything, so we don't even enter the fight. Honestly. Once the kids and dogs are sleeping, maybe I get a turn with the Cozy Earth blanket, which we have thrown over our couch in our family room. And it is so dang cozy, man. Ducky's the first one at it. Good luck getting him off. God forbid. Alfredo settled down on that thing. You got no chance. The one that I've really been using a lot that I love is the bathrobe.

[Hila Klein]

Right? I see you wearing my robe, Ethan.

[Ethan Klein]

It's my robe.

[Hila Klein]

It's my robe.

[Ethan Klein]

My robe.

[Hila Klein]

Isn't it so cozy?

[Ethan Klein]

It's so warm and cozy and comfy and it's heavy.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah. If I wake up, like, really tired and I don't feel like starting the day, I put that on. It's very comforting.

[Ethan Klein]

It's nice at night, too, when it's just, like, maybe it's a little chilly or sometimes the AC is a little cold, but you don't want to get under the blanket, rub, you know? I'm a stickler for a good night's rest, guys. The other thing that they're doing and this. Oh, God. I love good sheets. And you feel it, like when we put on our Cozy Earth sheets, when it enters the rotation, you go, oh, my God. I say, what sheets are these? Tell me, because I don't want to ever be in any other sheets again. Cozy Earth.

[Hila Klein]

And they sent me their pajama also, so soft.

[Ethan Klein]

Cozy Universe. Cozy Multiverse.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah, they know what they're doing.

[Ethan Klein]

No, but the sheets. The thing is, with good sheets, you are going to stay cool, and you are going to sleep longer and better. Apparently, they're more hygienic, too. They stay cleaner.

[Hila Klein]

Lord knows we need that with our dogs.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, God. But the thing is. Yeah. The more I'm learning about longevity and health, sleep is, like the far and away most important thing that I always hear about in terms of longevity. Longevity and health. And that's why you can't go cheap on sheets and Mattress. But the sheets really make the whole thing so smooth and soft inside, man.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

So good.

[Ethan Klein]

But they got all kinds of stuff too. They got, let's see. All day tees. All day tees for men and women. Women's rib knit pajama set. That's what you've been rocking a.

[Hila Klein]

They sent me the pajama. That is not rib. Let me find it on the website.

[Ethan Klein]

Yo, what the. Sorry, but I need one of these cozy earth tees. This looks amazing. Tom, where you at? Holy smokes. They also have an all day tee for women. I haven't worn one of these yet, but I just know this is gonna be the best shirt I've ever worn. Comfort wise, I love a good T

[Dan]

shirt, so I'm gonna hit Tom up.

[Ethan Klein]

Tom, Tom. I'm sure they've hooked us up with a lot of stuff. Ready? But I'm gonna need those shirts. Here's the sleepwear you like.

[Hila Klein]

I believe the pajama that I have gotten is this bamboo stretch knit.

[Ethan Klein]

Is it? Do you see it on here? Rib. This is bamboo rib knit classic.

[Hila Klein]

So it's not the rib, but it is the one after it.

[Ethan Klein]

This, this next one over, I think this.

[Hila Klein]

I don't know what page you're on. I'm looking on my computer. It looks different.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, anyway, how do you like them?

[Hila Klein]

I love it. I love it. It's so, so soft. Like everything they do and the fit is perfect. Yeah, I love it.

[Ethan Klein]

It's just about being cozy. That's the whole brand. So if you like being cozy, if you like the soft, the goods, the comfort, the cleanness, it's cozy earth every time. 10 out of 10 times. Yeah. I don't know how to describe the. The material. It's just soft and smooth and just so good. It's just so nice. Also, guess what? Cozy Earth is so confident in their products, they stand on business. What does that mean? Lifetime warranty on all of their stuff and a 30 days no hassle returns policy. If anything isn't right on the clothing. 30 days, no hassle return and a lifetime warranty. That's called confidence. It's called precision. That's called love. That's called care. Called premium. It's called Cozy Earth. This summer, Cozy Earth's all day tees and rib knit pajama set are the two things that we keep reaching for. I need that shirt. They're made from viscous, from bamboo, breathable, soft and built for the season you're actually living in. Very breathable for summer. Summer lives here and honestly, so does cooling comfort. Head to cozyearth.com and use my code H3 for an exclusive 20 off. Holy smokes. That's code H3 for an exclusive 20 on. If you see a post purchase survey, make sure to mention that you heard about Cozy Earth here on the H3 podcast. Once again, head to cozyearth.com and use my code H3 for an exclusive 20% discount. Code H3. Thank you. To Cozy Earth. Yeah. Oh, also, just. I'll mention this really fast, but I know everybody, this, I love this cutting board. It's back too. And I. This cutting board I reach for constantly in the kitchen and it's actually held up really good because like we. I know you're not supposed to dishwash and like, you're not really supposed to use like heavy washing materials on these cutting boards, but we, we dishwash, we wash the frick out of it. And I, that thing is in good shape. I've had cutting boards that I treat the same way and they are just falling apart unfortunately.

[Hila Klein]

But yeah, all of my friends and family, they love using it for charcuterie board. It's so cute. Or even just for presentation too. Just having it on your counter looks really cute.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[Hila Klein]

But yeah, Ethan, Ethan took it straight into usage. Hardcore usage.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. Well, it's a nice size. I don't always want to pull out like the biggest cutting board. Yeah, I'm cutting something small. It's nicer to use it on. Anyway, let's get into one of our head stories here, guys. We've got, we've got here a story about to meet the new European guideline for photographing women athletes. Now, we did a segment on this show a while ago called Men of Culture. And what it was is there was. I forget how I stumbled upon these videos. No jokes or commentary invited, but it was like clips of women doing sports. Volleyball. Shock put or not shock, but whatever. Pole vault. Pole vault. What is it called with the big stick?

[Jeremy]

Pole vaulting.

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay. And so anyway, all the comments on the video were like, ah, men of culture. I see we've come together again. And it was a club of men who had come together to look at these athletes and very little amount of clothing and very kind of compromising angles. Right. And so the Europeans have decided on new guidelines for photographing women athletes. And they're saying, no more to these men up there. They're cutting out the men of culture no longer. But I will say this, how are

[Hila Klein]

we going to do without men?

[Ethan Klein]

My initial thought was something like because when you see a lot of these, some of them make perfect sense and some of them are. Feel like a little odd to me because it's like mid action. But I was like, well, why don't they just wear like, you see a lot of these women athletes wearing what's essentially small bikini bottoms, right? Like, well, why don't they just wear like boy shorts or whatever you call gym? Whatever, I don't know you call those, but like just basically more clothes. And then I learned, which really put everything into perspective, a lot of these sports organizations have dress codes that require the women to wear tiny, tiny, essentially bikinis. And I was like, oh my gosh, I remember how pissed off when you were doing a waiting job that made you put on red lipstick.

[Hila Klein]

Yes.

[Ethan Klein]

But I can't imagine being told you have to wear such a tiny outfit. So EBU Sports, we're committed to ensuring that all athletes are portrayed with fairness, accuracy and respect. Shout out, king.

[Gabe]

It's called sports.

[Ethan Klein]

And then this guy also apparently is at European Athletics, we are committed to ensuring their sports is presented in a way that respects and empowers all athletes, regardless of gender, nationality, race, religion, sexual orientation or socionomical background. Nope, sorry. I say no poor people are allowed in this sport. There is unironically a lot of sports like that, like golf. I don't even think you can logistically play golf if you're poor. Like, I don't even think it's possible

[Jeremy]

there are public golf courses in Los

[Ethan Klein]

Angeles, but like the ball even getting balls. But yes, obviously driving, practicing.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, it's an expensive sport.

[Ethan Klein]

So. And then you have to, it's. You have to pay a green fee just to golf, don't you? Even on public ones.

[Jeremy]

Yep.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. And I mean, it's an expensive sport to keep up. This is a total tangent though, so it's totally irrelevant to this conversation. So let's take a look at the guidelines here. Trying. They have like a. Let's see. So here's. Wow. They have like a whole camera set up. So here, positive angles. The wide angle is the main angle for showing the run up and jump over the bar. It is also a popular angle for commentators and coaches as it shows the final few strides before takeoff. Okay, so these are good angles. Oh, now I'm gonna have to agree that this angle is pretty insane.

[Jeremy]

Pretty bad.

[Gabe]

As you can see, the report is on the screen.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Also.

[Ethan Klein]

I can't imagine it adds much insight looking up at a bar. Because you don't really know, right?

[Jeremy]

Yeah, that's you can't really glean information being.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. I mean when you, when you put it like that. A low camera angle underneath the at least athletes has a high chance of generating compromising images. Maintaining a close view and providing slow motion replays of the athletes clearing the bar diminishes technical insight and may produce. Yeah. So no slow mos of, you know.

[Hila Klein]

Thanks for coming guys.

[Ethan Klein]

This pov crotch and bikini. Now this one, this one, I can't say. What's their rationale with this one here?

[Harley]

I mean.

[Jeremy]

Well, I would say that that still like is not a very insightful angle for the high jump. Like you'd want to see it from the side to see if they're like hitting the bar and by being.

[Ethan Klein]

But you can see, you can really see how their body kind of contours over the bar here also. It doesn't, it doesn't straight. Like this one is obviously like you don't. Yeah, you don't need that one. But this one doesn't. I mean if you have a problem with this one, that seems more like a problem with the clothing.

[Jeremy]

Yes, right.

[Hila Klein]

Yes, that is my, my problem is the clothing.

[Ethan Klein]

And that means that y' all need to stop telling women what they need to wear when they're doing sports because that ain't right. That crotch rot. Right.

[Jeremy]

That's the other aspect of all of this is the fact that they, they until very recently in a lot of sports had doors can be up.

[Ethan Klein]

That's crazy. Yeah, that's crazy to me.

[Jeremy]

And by very recently, I mean literally like the last like four years.

[Ethan Klein]

Right. Like not. This is a new thing, this is a new meta.

[Jeremy]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

What's your argument? Well, up until very recently you could marry a child in California.

[Gabe]

So

[Ethan Klein]

you don't know what you don't know. What's your argument? I what against? I mean they're all spelled out right here. Brother and sister all just pay attention. So. And this one makes sense to me. We want a wide shot for replay. Highlights the technique in the final few strides. This provides an excellent angle for both the commentator and the coaches. Negative angle. By zooming in, you not only risk compromising images, but the angle does not provide any insight.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, that one's pretty crazy.

[Ethan Klein]

So here like this one's, this one's not as bad because it's kind of from like an angle. Yeah, the head on the like the straight on like cross shot.

[Hila Klein]

Agree.

[Jeremy]

Just a full on crotch shot. Crotch shot.

[Ethan Klein]

You know, you get that crotch.

[Jeremy]

No, you get that crotch.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. No, no, I don't know what it's like to have crotch rot, Jeremy. Do any of you guys know what it's like to have crotch rot?

[Jeremy]

No, I've been spared that, thankfully.

[Harley]

I don't.

[Ethan Klein]

Like, that's not like, oh, I didn't shower in a couple days. That's like crotch rotting.

[Dan]

Sounds like a yeast infection.

[Ethan Klein]

Sounds like a medical issue, right? Yeah. Yeah, boy. Dude, get out of here. Jeremy. It's also a great angle for observing athletes celebrating. Okay, fair. What happened? No cameras on the, on the tarmac while they're celebrating. Shooting up at them.

[Hila Klein]

Wait, so that is kind of weird. No, the one that they're saying, that's okay.

[Ethan Klein]

I mean, why?

[Kate]

Just because her armpits are out.

[Hila Klein]

It's just. What is it? I guess it's just a close up on her.

[Ethan Klein]

Just a regular shot.

[Hila Klein]

Why is it even in here?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, it's just very regular. They're like, you can just do a regular shot like this.

[Kate]

I don't know why they mentioned. I guess they. I feel like there was some conversation there where somebody on the team was like, what about armpits?

[Hila Klein]

Yeah, maybe.

[Kate]

What do you think about armpits? They're like, let's just like, let them know.

[Ethan Klein]

They're like, well, don't zoom on the armpit. Don't zoom on sisters. Yeah, exactly. We know someone who likes armpits.

[Kate]

Hi, sisters.

[Ethan Klein]

By the way, speaking of high sisters, I am so excited for my next campaign against sister that updates will be coming soon on that, so stay tuned. Things are. There's. There's a big one in and coming to fruition there. And it's going to be good. You guys are gonna love it.

[David]

You.

[Ethan Klein]

No, you perv.

[Kate]

Hello.

[Hila Klein]

Hello.

[Ethan Klein]

Here's another one. So again, this one, again, I can't. Zooming in or using slow mos on the athletes going over the bar diminishes technical insight and increases risk of compromising images. This one I don't know about.

[Kate]

I don't think. I don't think that isn't the point. And as someone who isn't athletic at all, but you know, I don't know. Because then they want. They want to get things from every angle.

[Ethan Klein]

Yes. No.

[Kate]

And in case something goes wrong or there's. It hits a certain way, you can see it. And I don't see really what's problematic about that. Again, I think that one is just like. Well, then it's.

[Ethan Klein]

It's a clothing issue. It's.

[Kate]

Exactly.

[Ethan Klein]

If you're seeing too much, like crotch, then it's a Clothing issue. Because that's like a normal angle.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

It seems like the rules, if I could just summarize it is like don't zoom in on the genitals.

[Harley]

Right, right.

[Ethan Klein]

Which is good.

[Kate]

Is the ads considered a genital?

[Ethan Klein]

Well, I mean, it's there, it's there.

[Jeremy]

Are you gonna have to show your genitals?

[Ethan Klein]

No, no, no, but like. No, but like there's a shot like I feel like this is according to Dan. No, not according to.

[Kate]

Damn, bro.

[Ethan Klein]

This one. I mean again, like I see what they're saying, but I mean what is

[Kate]

that, a warm up?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, they're just doing a warm up. It's just like a normal shot of them doing a warm up. And again, this is like a clothing issue. Your balls come out if you're not zooming in on their ass.

[Kate]

Right.

[Ethan Klein]

You have a camera, a stationary camera.

[Kate]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I agree.

[Ethan Klein]

And then what, how do you, how do you like tell the, the athletes? Like don't angle your ass towards the camera. You know, I mean you don't tell,

[Kate]

you don't tell the athletes anything.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, tell the cameraman, don't zoom on their frickin shit.

[Jeremy]

Only from the waist up.

[Hila Klein]

I feel like.

[Jeremy]

But yeah, I mean like in track and field, like that seems a little unrealistic.

[Ethan Klein]

You know, they got to stop hiring cameramen out of like the, the sex addicts rehab or. I don't, I don't know. That's not that funny analogy. But there's something out there.

[Hila Klein]

I don't get it.

[Ethan Klein]

But where do you find these guys to run these cameras? I don't know.

[Kate]

That's something about that shot.

[Jeremy]

That's powerful.

[Hila Klein]

I was gonna say the cameraman are gonna be so confused with these rules because they don't really make a lot of sense.

[Ethan Klein]

I feel like, I feel like it's. It is kind of confusing.

[Kate]

Yeah, I don't think, I mean, just

[Ethan Klein]

don't zoom on the jet on the gents. Keep the gents out of the zoo.

[Hila Klein]

Yes, but if, if the gents is touching the bar and you want to show if it's touching or not touching, you're going to be recording.

[Ethan Klein]

You got to do it from the side.

[Kate]

Is this being, is this also for men or is this just for women?

[Ethan Klein]

This is just women. Which we'll get into that because there are really funny. The gents also have their gents out and nobody seems to have an issue with. And I'm. I think we need to some equal protection here, you know?

[Kate]

Well, I guess maybe the thing is that these are just shots that are being taken mostly of women, though I

[Ethan Klein]

think men are getting it too, but nobody cares about and ball. I don't have enough dick for only fans, bro.

[Hila Klein]

You know?

[Ethan Klein]

But let's get. We'll get there. So this shot is good. I mean, that's good to know. Thank you. Fantastic. So this. Now they're showing this, I guess as a good shot, but this lines up with one of the shots they said not to do. It reminds me very much of this shot. Isn't it like kind of the same

[Hila Klein]

thing as this shot and the one under it too? Yeah, that one on both of them.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, this one is more like crotch head on. But this one is like angle.

[Jeremy]

This one's like three quarters.

[Ethan Klein]

This feels to me like this same fucking shot.

[Hila Klein]

It's going to be so confusing.

[Jeremy]

It's a little. This one's a little bit more from the side, but it's. It's a little ambiguous.

[Kate]

You could see. Yeah. More of the distance between them and the bar.

[Jeremy]

Exactly. Right. That's what I mean.

[Kate]

And I guess you're not getting that based on perspective of the crotch.

[Ethan Klein]

But again, I mean, this. At what point do we come, like, too puritanical. They're like always shoot on the opposite side of the crot. The crotch must never be facing the camera.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah, it's. I feel like in reality it's going to be really hard to follow because also, just don't zoom.

[Ethan Klein]

Let them wear what they want.

[Hila Klein]

What if the athlete ends up going in a bit more of an angle than you thought they would?

[Ethan Klein]

That will always happen.

[Gabe]

The cut. Cut.

[Ethan Klein]

Hit the button.

[Hila Klein]

Too much crotch, you're going to jail, cameraman.

[Ethan Klein]

So here's where all the cameras are. I don't know what the. This means. What now that. I mean.

[Kate]

Okay, an example of a camera plan.

[Ethan Klein]

So here's a good. Yeah, the pole vaulters get it bad. I know. I know that. These guys get it. So, yeah, these all seem. They're like a shot where you can barely see her from the distance is acceptable.

[Kate]

Yeah, I mean, this is like.

[Ethan Klein]

What is wrong with this?

[Hila Klein]

What's wrong with this angle to see that. Well, why don't they practice so hard

[Kate]

for a replay angle? But when zoomed in, it can offer shots like this. I mean, it doesn't offer much, but

[Ethan Klein]

you can see her midriff in which the rules dictate she must show, but we cannot show. It's too much.

[Kate]

No, no. Is this just about it being inappropriate or is it just about. Or is it More than that, though, it seems like that is just. Hey, this is a bad shock.

[Ethan Klein]

The angle is sometimes used for a replay angle, but when zoomed in, it can offer shots like this. This replay doesn't offer anything to the commentary. What? Shots like this? But nothing's even happening. Okay, that's odd. Let's see here. Positive angles. I don't, I don't even know what the. This is. Trying to show this angle. Again, she's.

[Hila Klein]

That's just. That's just a person from the back.

[Kate]

Yeah, you're not. They're explicitly saying no bend over shots.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, there's. If you read the caption.

[Ethan Klein]

But athletes bend over a lot.

[Kate]

That's what it says.

[Ethan Klein]

They're stretching. They're preparing to anticipate when an athlet

[Kate]

will bend over in front of a camera.

[Ethan Klein]

But then just sometimes have them wear something else. Just let them wear something else. So, like, if the athlete is like, I don't want to be sexualized or show or. It makes me uncomfortable. Whatever. I want to wear something else. It makes me uncomfortable. Just let them wear that.

[Kate]

No, but they're going to want to wear that. Because if you're doing pole vaulting, you want to be any. In almost nothing so that you're not touching the hole.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, but you could wear tight. You can wear tight clothes.

[Kate]

Yeah, but I, I think.

[Hila Klein]

Why not? For example, a long, like yoga tight, you know.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, that.

[Hila Klein]

Why does it have to be.

[Kate]

I just think that's more restrictive how.

[Ethan Klein]

No, it's not.

[Kate]

As it is.

[Hila Klein]

You're saying.

[Kate]

I'm saying you're not an athlete.

[Ethan Klein]

I mean, you're talking about like this.

[Kate]

I mean, I'm not, but I'm, I'm saying. Yeah, that's just. I'm not. Listen, if they want. I think they. If they want to, they should be able to wear whatever they want. But I just think most, even with that would probably wear something close to that.

[Jeremy]

So in track and field, specifically, which this section of the guideline seems to be focused on, track and field doesn't have super restrictive. Some sports do. And that's where, like the controversy, which we'll get to later, is about where they were requiring them to wear very revealing outfits. But track and field, from what I understand, doesn't have that. So the. What it oftentimes comes down to, though, is for these national teams, they'll be sponsored by some company like Nike's or Adidas, make the uniforms, and they are expected to wear that. And if those uniforms are designed to be revealing, then you kind of are out of luck, essentially. But the, the track and field organization's rules don't. Like, you can. You can wear, you know, looser fitted clothing if you want.

[Ethan Klein]

It just seems confusing. And it even says so in the copy. It's difficult to anticipate when an athlete will bend over. It's like, so.

[Jeremy]

They're just saying so. Just avoid it just in case.

[Ethan Klein]

And sometimes it's impossible to avoid. In this instance, athlete is lifting the pole and a closer shot of her face before her forehand. The camera operator moving to the side of her might have helped avoid this image. It just.

[Hila Klein]

Okay.

[Jeremy]

I mean, I, I, that. That's not incorrect.

[Ethan Klein]

I suppose this angle just doesn't seem that crazy to me. Seems like something that was just gonna naturally occur a lot.

[Kate]

Yeah, right. Yeah, I, Yeah, I agree.

[Ethan Klein]

It's not like un. It's the ones that are really, like, gratuitous is the ones under. The ones under, like, girl is so

[Kate]

obvious what you're doing right now.

[Jeremy]

Right?

[Harley]

Right.

[Kate]

I might say girl. I don't mean the athlete. I mean the cameraman.

[Ethan Klein]

And that's always like the men of culture ones. It's always like the shots looking up.

[Jeremy]

The men of culture ones.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. So here, these are good shots.

[Kate]

And then I don't think there's any. I don't think there's anything wrong with those shots on the right.

[Ethan Klein]

What?

[Jeremy]

Top right one is.

[Ethan Klein]

I mean, it's dope. She's upside down. That's.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, I guess. Okay, I see.

[Kate]

Stan, this is.

[Jeremy]

No, I just mean that I, I'm. It's more the drawing.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, that's true. Often this camera has a SSM lens and can be used for replays. Staying tight on the athlete can result in compromising.

[Jeremy]

Compromising.

[Kate]

One of their labia popped out.

[Ethan Klein]

I have never seen that, for the record.

[Hila Klein]

I mean, what are we talking about?

[Kate]

Too much thigh? I mean, what.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, I don't.

[Kate]

How is this compromising? They've been compromised.

[Ethan Klein]

If it's compromising. It seems like an issue with the clothing. But again, I don't know. What do I know? I'd actually be really curious to get, like, an athlete's take on this.

[Hila Klein]

Do we have any?

[Gabe]

You should.

[Jeremy]

Not this audience. No, I'm just kidding.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, yeah, bro. Bring that.

[Jeremy]

What's happening?

[Ethan Klein]

Thank you.

[Jeremy]

All right.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, yeah.

[Jeremy]

What's with the no red, yo? They redid new packaging.

[Hila Klein]

Huh?

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, I think it's for the World cup, baby.

[Kate]

That's hideous.

[Hila Klein]

That is not McDonald's.

[Ethan Klein]

Tastes like McDonald's frozen solid meats.

[Hila Klein]

Now I feel like I should order something fun.

[Ethan Klein]

Do you think they freeze these burgers?

[Jeremy]

Are they McDonald's?

[Ethan Klein]

Definitely frozen salad.

[Hila Klein]

Just the patty.

[Ethan Klein]

What is the meat?

[Hila Klein]

The meat patty.

[Gabe]

The meat's frozen.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Oh, it is.

[Ethan Klein]

Frozen sauce. I was just wondering frozen salad meat. Because some places they go never frozen, but McDonald's. Thank you, Ab. Thank you so much. When you eat these fries, you go one at a time or you go like two or three.

[Kate]

Kate is saying two or three that

[Hila Klein]

she thinks maybe part of the issue

[Kate]

with those shots is the facelessness.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Faceless.

[Ethan Klein]

Just ass crush. Right.

[Jeremy]

I can understand that, I suppose.

[Kate]

I don't think that's.

[Ethan Klein]

I think that's silly.

[Kate]

They'll just be like, well, their face should always be in the shot.

[Ethan Klein]

But I know who it is.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Actually, well, Kate is, like, really into, like, women's sports, so I. I am curious what her opinion is on that.

[Hila Klein]

Why don't she chime in?

[Ethan Klein]

But I just can't help feel like some of these are silly. I don't know what the fuck. I don't even know if she's going over or coming. This drawing is so bad.

[Jeremy]

Yeah. I don't want to be too harsh on the poor artists that made these drawings, but part of it. Yeah, I think part of the confusion is they're not particularly good images.

[Kate]

What's above them? Is that stars?

[Hila Klein]

Wait, what do you mean?

[Ethan Klein]

Camera flash. Camera flash.

[Kate]

Is that what that is?

[Jeremy]

I. Presumably it has to be.

[Hila Klein]

The top right is like when the person is falling.

[Kate]

Falling?

[Hila Klein]

Yeah, it's like this big jump.

[Jeremy]

You know, she's about to break her neck.

[Hila Klein]

This is when they go down.

[Ethan Klein]

No, she's talking about the bottom right. I think it looks like stars.

[Kate]

Are you saying that's what's comp. Yeah, that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That is what I'm talking about. The stars.

[Hila Klein]

The stars, yeah. It looks like some of the art is coming through.

[Ethan Klein]

That's all. The prying eyes of the men.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Yeah.

[Gabe]

Twinkling.

[Jeremy]

The men of culture's eyes twinkling in the distance.

[Ethan Klein]

This positive angle is used to show the distance. Okay, fine. Yeah. Like, all shots should be from at least a hundred yard. A hundred yards away to reduce the risk of compromising.

[Jeremy]

I do understand in this pole vault and I don't know, presumably this document has something to say other than about sports, other than the pole vault. Right. These have all been pole vault related so far.

[Ethan Klein]

I think pole vault maybe is one of the.

[Jeremy]

One of the worst offenders or something. I see. I guess that might be True.

[Ethan Klein]

So, I mean, of course these are safe. Again, they're, like, far. This one. I mean, sure. I mean, again, it's just very much like bending down because it's not from the bottom. It's from, like, the body's pov. This just seems like the type of shot you can't really prevent happening. Happening.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Right.

[Kate]

See, now, the one at the very bottom.

[Jeremy]

Yeah.

[Kate]

That one looks like it's a blind person with a walker. But secondly, I don't.

[Ethan Klein]

Listen, we don't need cameras on the ground.

[Kate]

Yeah. Like, it's like, what are you doing? This isn't a movie, buddy. You know, like, the cameraman's, like, getting

[Jeremy]

that cinematic with it.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Dan]

Anyone else think that cartoon looks like Bill Clinton?

[Hila Klein]

Yes.

[Kate]

Yes.

[Ethan Klein]

I like the way he jumped.

[Dan]

I can't do the angles anymore.

[Ethan Klein]

I'm looking for a secretary.

[Dan]

Hillary was right.

[Ethan Klein]

Seemed like you'd be good at paperwork, huh?

[Nate]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Bend over. And then this one again, I'm not sure. It's more like the way she's sitting.

[Kate]

I don't know what the issue is with that photo.

[Hila Klein]

I don't know. She just lost or something.

[Ethan Klein]

She's just down, feeling forlorn. Often, the roaming camera provides artistic shots of the athletes. However, there are times when these angles can be compromising, uncomfortable for the athletes, particularly when the camera is positioned low or behind them. I mean, low and behind. I agree with this one. Doesn't seem lower behind, though. If this is, like, their prime example of. You know what? I feel like dudes wrote these rules.

[Kate]

No, A woman would. This has a woman's touch.

[Ethan Klein]

Because I. I think so.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Sorry.

[Kate]

Sorry, I. Yeah.

[Hila Klein]

You mean you agree with Nathan?

[Kate]

I can't tell.

[Ethan Klein]

No.

[Kate]

No, no, no. I think a woman was involved in this.

[Hila Klein]

You do? Yes. Really? Why?

[Kate]

I don't want to say.

[Ethan Klein]

Tomorrow's a little of a. She's a little misogynistic.

[Kate]

No, I am not.

[Ethan Klein]

You. What you mean is, if men did this, it would actually make sense.

[Hila Klein]

No, I.

[Caller (Various)]

What?

[Hila Klein]

I. You guys just say what you want to say.

[Dan]

I'm not.

[Kate]

I feel there's no way a woman wasn't involved in this. Are you kidding?

[Ethan Klein]

No, I know what you're trying to say. Tomorrow it was.

[Kate]

A woman was involved at some capacity. Was like, you know. Come on. Come on.

[Ethan Klein]

What else we got here? Her celebrating. Normal. Good.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Sure.

[Ethan Klein]

That's like, an easy call, right? Then this one, I mean, I guess a dope shot. I guess. Yeah.

[Kate]

Getting the audiences in.

[Ethan Klein]

It doesn't seem, like, overly gratuitous, but.

[Dan]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

That one's a little questionable, too.

[Ethan Klein]

And then again.

[Nate]

Well.

[Hila Klein]

So wait, so is this not okay?

[Ethan Klein]

It. I think this is like.

[Jeremy]

No, I think that's an example of an okay one.

[Kate]

But then why is that above?

[Hila Klein]

It is not okay.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, I feel like you could line this up with one of the ones that isn't.

[Kate]

Oh, wait, wait. Go back down. Go back down. Is it because the base is in it?

[Hila Klein]

Why is that one not okay and this one's okay? See, this is so confusing.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, right?

[Jeremy]

That is a little odd.

[Ethan Klein]

But by the way, look at what she's wearing. This is what exactly you can. You can wear, like, a tight one piece, and you're not going to get caught on the play. It's not going to change your performance. And take that from me as a.

[Hila Klein]

As a professional athlete, all of us here.

[Jeremy]

Oh, here we go. We're moving on from the pole jump.

[Harley]

Finally.

[Ethan Klein]

Now we're at the horizontal jump, the sandbox. Sandbox. So here we go. Obviously, these are okay, right?

[Jeremy]

Like, obviously look pretty standard.

[Ethan Klein]

These obviously are okay. Like, that's not even a question. All right, these are obviously okay. So why don't you tell us about the ones that aren't okay? Because the ones that are okay are obvious, right? They're like a very vanilla shot looking at the person from the side. Oh, okay, here we go. Now we're getting into the negative stuff. Now the problem here is when they hit the sand is the point of interest, you know?

[Kate]

You know what? For me, honestly, this conversation is kind of like, I need to see how they do the men's shots, right? Because maybe if the men's are that. Because to me, this isn't. If they're doing everyone's shots like this, I don't really see the issue.

[Ethan Klein]

I wonder, of course.

[Kate]

And I don't think it's sexualized. I think it's the viewer that's sexualizing it. Other than when it's those really explicit angles that's like.

[Hila Klein]

Like, right.

[Kate]

This is up there, up their butt.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, we will look at the men shots, and maybe there's dick and balls. And we never noticed. They're like, compromise. Like, dude's balls be popping out. I don't got enough. But do some wear bikini bottoms?

[Jeremy]

Have you seen that?

[Ethan Klein]

It's wear, like, boy shorts.

[Jeremy]

There was, like, a viral clip from like a year or two ago of a dude doing the high jump thing, and as he came down, it, like, slams his. His dick, like, hits him.

[Ethan Klein]

Pull it.

[Jeremy]

Oh, somebody sent it.

[Kate]

I mean, I sent it. But yeah, okay, let me find it.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, you sent it in the chat earlier.

[Kate]

Yeah, but he was his gift, Nate.

[Ethan Klein]

I don't got enough dick.

[Kate]

Oh, okay. Might be good at pole vaulting then, because he. This man was hurt by his gift.

[Ethan Klein]

I've been working like a dog. Although this angle is suitable for the beginning of the run up, once the athlete has commenced running, does not provide any insight for the commentators or coaches remaining on this angle for the landing and exit from the sandpit is likely to produce an unflattering image. Unflattering? I don't know. This is so funny.

[Kate]

Okay, that.

[Ethan Klein]

Wait, she got no leg.

[Hila Klein]

What is happening?

[Gabe]

She drew.

[Ethan Klein]

They drew someone from Paralympics with one with no leg.

[Nate]

I think all these images are pretty specific though, because in every image they're either bending their butt, spreading their legs and the camera is right in there. Isn't the point that these exact frames could be avoided by switching to a B camera from the other side or whatever?

[Ethan Klein]

But you're missing the.

[Nate]

Yeah, you could have that shot from another.

[Ethan Klein]

You don't, you don't need this shot. Yeah, you could show this shot from

[Nate]

the side if you could scroll up a little bit. Again, I think these specific angles are like literally exactly. This shouldn't be shown, you know what I mean? Because she's bending her butt right there. That could have been a other camera from the right. This second shot is right in there. You know what I mean?

[Jeremy]

Right.

[Nate]

Like, I feel like the. These could be avoided. It's like a multi million dollar production. They have like cameras all over. Right? Not anymore, but you know, you know what I mean? Like just a slight angle change on all of these would make it okay.

[Ethan Klein]

This one is tough. Like, how do you avoid this?

[Nate]

You change it.

[Kate]

Yeah, I mean that, yeah, that's like

[Nate]

a super explicit go from the side. Should go from the side. Because the thing is, you got top class switchers like Nate, they'll recognize that pretty quick boom switch.

[Ethan Klein]

But you know, again, look what this athlete's wearing. You know,

[Nate]

I think it's like a. Like historically they've tried getting the, the naughty angles now. Yeah, for sure it's in text. Like, guys, you cannot do this, right? Like just that, like just they're being like, listen, if you get caught like getting a gooner angle on purpose, you're fucked. Now it's explicitly, you're not.

[Jeremy]

There's a guideline that they can point to.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, but you know what I mean. One, I agree that there should be some guidelines, right? But I just find These instructions a lot of times like very confusing.

[Nate]

I think they should be like overly sensitive in the instructions and then like the outcome will be somewhere in between probably.

[Jeremy]

Right.

[Nate]

Because yeah, they are even saying like this is going to be really hard to avoid, but basically try to.

[Ethan Klein]

You know, what they need is like at major events they need like someone there to give the final call on camera angles. Because it's not like up to the camera guy. There's someone who's producing the event, telling everyone. Yeah, I think.

[Nate]

Well, yeah, that's the point. They're talking about different camera. Camera three, camera two.

[Kate]

Yeah, they were showing camera plans.

[Ethan Klein]

But you think the director is setting up Goomer Gooner shots. That's crazy. No, I fire his ass.

[Nate]

I think it's like the switcher because like some, some angles are always going to be Gooner. Whatever angle it is, just switch away from that. Because if you go up. They had like five different cameras. One of them will be fine. I feel.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, here's our boy. French pole vaulter Anthony Amarati saw his Olympic dream go up in smoke after his own penis knocked off the bar. Oh, this isn't what I saw. Okay. I saw one where the pole vault nicks his balls.

[Law Enforcement Narrator]

Well, that.

[Jeremy]

Well, you'll see.

[Ethan Klein]

And it looks so bad. The 21 year old compet competing in front of his home crowd looked all set to clear. It should have worn tighter. Well, let's see how floppy his dick is in this.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Eh.

[Ethan Klein]

Wait, hold on. Was it really his? I need a different angle.

[Kate]

Like I don't even.

[Ethan Klein]

Was it really his dick?

[Kate]

Yeah, it totally was.

[Jeremy]

There's something down there.

[Hila Klein]

Why is it so.

[Ethan Klein]

But his crotch is really far away from it. Or is it on the way down?

[Jeremy]

It's on the way down.

[Hila Klein]

It's on the way down. Right here.

[Jeremy]

Literally happening right now.

[Kate]

Yep. And then cursed by his gift, bro's

[Dan]

got a Lou the 16th inch in his pants.

[Kate]

I don't even think that this is him being sexualized. I think this is just an accident.

[Ethan Klein]

This is just.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah, it's the human body.

[Kate]

Exactly.

[Dan]

He's got the Eiffel Tower, man.

[Hila Klein]

That's okay, Zach.

[Ethan Klein]

Now unironically, I think they. I think it would make sense to tape it back for this.

[Kate]

Yeah, seriously.

[Hila Klein]

Why is it so loosey goosey in there?

[Dan]

Put that in the gear.

[Ethan Klein]

He's like, lock it down, brother.

[Hila Klein]

Keep watching. After that it goes like all the way down.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, it looks. If his dick can like jiggle around that much. I feel like it's too loose. Like he's not wearing underwear.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, no, that's. User error.

[Kate]

So why is. Why do the men. Why is he in the long shorts that women are in the tighty?

[Ethan Klein]

Well, that one woman athlete I showed you was wearing this outfit.

[Hila Klein]

I feel like this would.

[Ethan Klein]

Why is there so much flex in his crot? He's not tied down.

[Hila Klein]

Like, this would be the equivalent of a woman doing this without a bra.

[Ethan Klein]

100%. This guy.

[Harley]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

He needs some sort of girder.

[Ethan Klein]

Look at that.

[Hila Klein]

What is that?

[Ethan Klein]

Nah, dude, this is his fault.

[Kate]

That must have happened to him practicing a few times.

[Ethan Klein]

I think he's trying to show his shit off, to be honest.

[Nate]

It wasn't frozen salt.

[Gabe]

The meat. The meat was.

[Ethan Klein]

Was thawed. Frozen solid.

[Gabe]

Me.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. That is interesting.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah. Chad is saying they gotta tuck it for the Olympics.

[Ethan Klein]

I think.

[Kate]

I think you gotta tuck it back.

[Ethan Klein]

G sent me. What did you send me? Is this the same thing? Yes. The same guy? Yeah. I seen one word, full vault. On the way down, he clears it, and then somehow the vault gets under him and it literally catches his dick and balls. Like, crazy shot, dude. And you can see him, like, grasp in pain in the air.

[Jeremy]

Let me see if I can find that.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, yeah. I think it's kind of common sense, though. Just don't, like, zoom in on the crotch and ass.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, yeah. I mean, that's most of the. Of what this boils down to.

[Ethan Klein]

What is. Okay, why are we showing. So we're showing feet. Interesting. Using this angle shows the foot. Yeah. These.

[Jeremy]

Wait, where is it? Yeah, where is this going?

[Ethan Klein]

I want to talk about. How are they. How. What does the feet have to do with anything?

[Jeremy]

Yeah.

[Gabe]

What?

[Ethan Klein]

Because then they go, like. This is obvious, right?

[David]

Yeah.

[Kate]

See, that's what I'm talking about.

[Ethan Klein]

This is the obvious one.

[Kate]

It's like, what the. See, this could have been.

[Jeremy]

What is that?

[Kate]

What are we. That's.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, that's like a shoe cam.

[Dan]

I can't imagine the cameraman on the

[Jeremy]

floor, he's laying down.

[Caller (Various)]

Okay, now.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, no, obviously we ain't doing that.

[Ethan Klein]

What's wrong with this?

[Kate]

That's ridiculous.

[Jeremy]

That one seems. Of all of the no's, that one, I take the most issue. You can't show them in front of the adoring crowd, applauding them.

[Kate]

Yeah. Hyping up the crowd.

[Ethan Klein]

This one, too?

[Hila Klein]

Yeah, this one.

[Jeremy]

I mean, that one, at least I could understand that. She's bending over in that picture. The other one is slightly.

[Ethan Klein]

You know, after, like, there's a race, the athletes, they walk around.

[Jeremy]

Sure.

[Ethan Klein]

They bend over. They. I mean, these are just. These are the kind of shots that you.

[Jeremy]

Fair enough, fair enough.

[Hila Klein]

She's barely even bending over. It's just like leaning forward, you know,

[Kate]

I think there's a huge difference between those.

[Ethan Klein]

She's not like tying her shoes or some shit.

[Kate]

You know, that top one and the two below it like that. Like, why are we that very.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Again, just common sense. Right.

[Hila Klein]

And then it's funny to me that we even need to say that the hugging picture is okay. What is.

[Ethan Klein]

Why did they include the feet one though.

[Kate]

I didn't know.

[Ethan Klein]

To illustrate. The foot position on the board is highly informative.

[Kate]

We don't have a problem with feet.

[Jeremy]

Yeah. And I mean, it makes sense why you would see that. To see if they're over the line or not. But there was no, like, there was no Right. There was no counter example with this one. It was just like. And by the way, the feet are fine. No worries there. Zoom all you like.

[Ethan Klein]

Let's take a look here.

[Nate]

They're going through all the camera angles showed.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

As they're just being thorough.

[Ethan Klein]

Galia sent me this as an example.

[Dan]

I don't know if we. This has not been checked.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, I mean, it's a min of. I mean, we did.

[Kate]

It's.

[Ethan Klein]

We know what it is.

[Kate]

Okay, so what are we doing right now? Did you just see that shot? How it was doing?

[Ethan Klein]

Wait, what did they go down on purpose? I. I closed it because I got a little uncomfy.

[Nate]

I mean, you can tell.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

It's.

[Kate]

Why are we so low?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, why do you know? What the hell are we. Why did you go down?

[Kate]

Yeah, that's a problem. Somebody needs.

[Hila Klein]

Huge problem. She's not even doing the sport right now.

[Ethan Klein]

That should be. That guy should go to jail.

[Kate]

Cameraman is moving around.

[Ethan Klein]

He literally just a pervert, you know, that's like a person you see in the mall taking pictures, right?

[Hila Klein]

Because like that's the guy ab caught last week.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, true.

[Harley]

That's true.

[Ethan Klein]

Why did you do that, bro? It was just for him. He wasn't even thinking about the audience. Yeah, yeah.

[David]

He got lost.

[Ethan Klein]

He's like, oh, oh, let me get the shot.

[Nate]

She.

[Harley]

She bent down for a second. So that was the excuse he needed to go low first.

[Hila Klein]

This one is so crazy. That's so bad because at least in the guideline they're like mid act of the sport. So there's some debate to have this

[Ethan Klein]

guy made it happen.

[Hila Klein]

This is. They're just hanging out.

[Ethan Klein]

All on his own.

[Hila Klein]

Wow.

[Ethan Klein]

That's what we call a man of culture.

[Hila Klein]

Okay. I guess that's why there's a guideline.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, but, yeah, now, but that's obvious.

[Kate]

They've done a bad job with the guidelines. They've, in my opinion, I think they're

[Nate]

being overly like on this. They're airing on the side of caution because look at these Gooner camera guys.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Nate]

They're insane.

[Ethan Klein]

Like, that's, that's.

[Nate]

I mean, I, I, I, I. They do be doing that. You'll see that regularly too.

[Kate]

Right.

[Nate]

Like, they just be swooping in like that.

[Ethan Klein]

I don't disagree. I just don't. I'm just confused. If I was a cameraman, I'd be a little bit confused. Right, right. And then again, like, you look at this shot and I'm like, well, this shot is fine. Doesn't look that different from the, like, maybe like a couple degrees. Okay. Running okay. Fair.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, that one's.

[Ethan Klein]

We don't need that shot.

[Jeremy]

That one's pretty fair.

[Ethan Klein]

That's funny.

[Hila Klein]

Okay, you know what?

[Jeremy]

Now that's close to what they did we just saw in that TikTok.

[Hila Klein]

So I'm starting to understand what they're referencing here.

[Jeremy]

Right.

[Hila Klein]

Like those in the middle here, those two.

[Ethan Klein]

This should be from the side. We don't need any back angle.

[Jeremy]

Right, Right.

[Nate]

Or the front.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, Just from the side, I think, you know.

[Nate]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Although those are pretty cool shots of them. Like.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

I feel from the front all like.

[Nate]

Yeah, that's awesome.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Heads in the game. Didn't you say not in the front?

[Nate]

No, I said from the front.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. There's nothing to gain from the back that the front fell off.

[Kate]

What's the hugging one?

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, but she's like standing.

[Gabe]

What?

[Ethan Klein]

She's like on tippy toes. Wait, this is a problem. She's wearing, like, that one. I feel like these aren't normal pants.

[Jeremy]

Well, I think some are like that they wrote.

[Hila Klein]

It is. Yeah. Some.

[Nate]

Well, they could have cropped it.

[Jeremy]

Yeah. They could have just zoomed into just the torsos.

[Ethan Klein]

Hugging, I guess. Yeah. Just zoom in a little bit.

[Hila Klein]

Okay.

[Ethan Klein]

Tighten it up.

[Hila Klein]

So that's why they had, they did have a hugging shot that I was like, why do we even need to show that?

[Jeremy]

This is the counter example.

[Ethan Klein]

Tighten it up a little bit. This one too. You could tighten up, I guess also,

[Nate]

she's not playing the game. I think that's also a point with these.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, they're, they're celebrating after she won the race. Gotta show that. Or they're catching their breath after the Race. I mean, you show that, don't you?

[Jeremy]

Chill, Sly.

[Kate]

I just had included, like, the real. Like, that video that we saw. Like, I feel like they should have included some real examples.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, get with. It's 2026. What's this? PDF? Yeah, we need some, like, video example.

[Ethan Klein]

They're being super woke. They didn't want to objectify anyone, even though that would have been the most efficient way of telling people what to not avoid.

[Jeremy]

I will point out these guidelines were developed by four women. It looks like.

[Ethan Klein]

So interesting.

[Hila Klein]

Sorry,

[Kate]

it should have been by women.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, you know, Dom, I think all women. Even though. Oh, Gary, we caught a guy.

[Jeremy]

Gary.

[Ethan Klein]

Who asked you? Gary.

[Kate]

Gary. Sex pest. Pass.

[Ethan Klein]

Honestly, Zach, you're right. All I think about when I hear that when I see this. Play it. This is not the Olympics I signed up for. It's not right what you did to our sports. White House. Wait, the White House tweets Patriot guidelines? Wait, actually, is this in response to that?

[Jeremy]

Yes. And.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, this was like, a big story. Okay, let's see. Holding the flag up. Positive. Stepping on the flag, bad.

[Hila Klein]

And they.

[Ethan Klein]

This is the weirdest Maga hat, good. Sombrero bad.

[Hila Klein]

They really did post.

[Ethan Klein]

Wait, what's wrong with sombrero?

[Hila Klein]

Right? Like, it's a real post.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, I think the implications.

[Ethan Klein]

Don't be Mexican.

[Kate]

It's a real post, Dan. I thought you said it.

[Ethan Klein]

No, it is here with the White House. Oh, my God, it's right here. White at White House.

[Hila Klein]

Somebody wake me up from this.

[Kate]

What the.

[Gabe]

What?

[Ethan Klein]

Sombrero bad. The longer list. What if you're at a. What if you're at a Mexican party?

[Jeremy]

Doesn't matter, dude.

[Ethan Klein]

Wear maga.

[Jeremy]

You wear a Maga hat to the fiesta.

[Ethan Klein]

What's wrong with this one?

[Hila Klein]

Yeah, what are they saying here?

[Nate]

What's tomorrow doing?

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, they're saying, keep in out of women's sports.

[Harley]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

Yes, exactly.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

But.

[Ethan Klein]

But this is just a guy.

[Jeremy]

It's just a guy in blue jeans.

[Ethan Klein]

Not, like a trans person. It's just a guy.

[Jeremy]

And also, he won so hard that there isn't even a third place.

[Ethan Klein]

Third place murder. Died on the field. And this girl's not even in athletic wear. No, either.

[Hila Klein]

He isn't either. Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

What did he win? Like, employee of the programmer of the month.

[Nate]

They didn't have time to reprompt the AI here. All right?

[Jeremy]

They were in a rush to get this banger out.

[Ethan Klein]

Six million views, though.

[Jeremy]

Shout out.

[Hila Klein]

So sad. That's so sad.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, okay, then we make it immediately about Israel.

[Hila Klein]

Okay. Of Course.

[Jeremy]

Top comment.

[Ethan Klein]

Sombrero is fine as long as you step on.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah, okay.

[Jeremy]

Oh, well, wait, hold on. So we've at least, you know, it's a trade. We got rid of the anti Hispanic sentiment and exchanged it for anti Semitism, saying, no, Mexicans are actually fine.

[Ethan Klein]

If you want to wear sombrero, there's

[Hila Klein]

one hate to rule them all.

[Dan]

So there should be a yarmulke in there instead of sombrero.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, right. And then it would be a bullseye instead of an. So shout out to the White House there.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, shout out to the White House.

[Hila Klein]

They're busy doing important things.

[Ethan Klein]

Comparison of men's to women's uniforms prior to the change. Let's have a look.

[Jeremy]

So this was in regards to. There was a story in 2021 of the Norwegian beach handball team protesting the fact that they had to wear revealing outfits and the men's team didn't. So this is the image prior to their protest of what the official uniforms for the men's versus the women are. And I feel like this image really just kind of sums it up because

[Ethan Klein]

theirs is, like, their pants are, like, tiny and their tops are tiny.

[Jeremy]

Yes. So if you look. The next link is what they chose to wear in protest and were subsequently fined by the organizers repeatedly. They kept wearing it for, like. Like, the duration of a tournament and kept racking up fines.

[Ethan Klein]

And this is what I mean.

[Jeremy]

For wearing this instead.

[Ethan Klein]

Like, if you're talking about mobility, like, this is obviously right.

[Jeremy]

So this is not. This is still, I would say, fairly revealing, just not, like, absurdly so. You know what I mean? But they were fined for this, and this caused such an uproar, the fact that they were punished for wearing this, that they were able to get the rules changed. And it sort of started this process where a lot of these sports are now starting to loosen the. The dress code guidelines.

[Ethan Klein]

Look at all this mayonnaise, dude. Why they do that? Looks like some miniculture had their way with my bun, you know, Gross for

[Hila Klein]

me to say that about your own food. And are you gonna still eat it?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. I'm taking the mayonnaise off, though. Look what I'm doing.

[Kate]

Hey, Hila. Look what I got.

[Ethan Klein]

You like mayonnaise? Yeah, I like mayonnaise. You like mayonnaise?

[Hila Klein]

Let me see it.

[Ethan Klein]

What is it?

[Hila Klein]

That's so cute.

[Kate]

What's the.

[Hila Klein]

What's the. What's the theme?

[Ethan Klein]

Why are we talking about this?

[Hila Klein]

She got a Happy Meal. Is that Alfredo?

[Jeremy]

That's cute.

[Ethan Klein]

Why is there so much sauce on my.

[Jeremy]

How they do it. You saw. You knew what you signed up for. You were watching Gay beating. You were pointing out how sloppy it was.

[Hila Klein]

What is it from

[Kate]

Thing? Indian.

[Ethan Klein]

Don't show me eating.

[Jeremy]

That's Nate. I showed you the guidelines the other day, bro.

[Ethan Klein]

You're gonna get fined.

[Jeremy]

I'm gonna find the shit. Yes.

[Ethan Klein]

Thank you.

[Jeremy]

From the wide shot. Only while he's eating. Thank you. Nate, please try and lock in.

[Gabe]

Ennis.

[Ethan Klein]

Excuse me for a second.

[Jeremy]

Where are you going?

[Gabe]

Oh,

[Nate]

just size bottle.

[Ethan Klein]

No, no, no.

[Gabe]

Cut away.

[Nate]

Close up.

[Hila Klein]

There's something on the carpet.

[Nate]

Can we get the handheld?

[Jeremy]

You're both doing a. You're both doing a misandry right now, dude.

[Ethan Klein]

Follow the guidelines, bro.

[Gabe]

God.

[Ethan Klein]

Get out of here. Freak.

[Dan]

Pervert.

[Hila Klein]

Gunner.

[Kate]

I think a lot of these issues, though, are, like, comes from just mostly having that low angle.

[Jeremy]

Yeah.

[Kate]

Which is. There's no.

[Jeremy]

You gotta get those cameras up.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

Keep them up.

[Ethan Klein]

Is there any sport you need a low angle on?

[Jeremy]

Sports, guys?

[Kate]

Maybe like shooting.

[Ethan Klein]

Not shoot. I think so. I don't know.

[Dan]

Baseball sometimes to see if the runner is safe at first.

[Jeremy]

I guess that's true.

[Ethan Klein]

When that's. But I guess. I guess ground looking up is pretty much never a good shot.

[Jeremy]

Not really.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. No. Well, Shout out to the Norwegian ladies.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah, seriously Badass. And they actually. Sounds like they actually started a change.

[Ethan Klein]

How much were they being fined for wearing this?

[Jeremy]

I think I saw €1500 per game.

[Hila Klein]

Oh, my God.

[Ethan Klein]

That's fucking bananas.

[Nate]

That's like 1.7 K. But I think

[Jeremy]

I read that celebrities and the public, like, intervened and paid their fines for them because it became like a fairly viral thing at the time.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, but shout out to the Norwegian ladies on the handball team. And they. They made it happen there.

[Hila Klein]

So hold up.

[Jeremy]

Hey, what the Is this angle, Nate? Guys, get it together.

[David]

No,

[Hila Klein]

what did we just talk about for the last hour?

[Gabe]

Hey, hit the button.

[Kate]

Oh, my God.

[Hila Klein]

Oh, my God. These guys are. They cannot continue to do that.

[Kate]

This is not informative for the audience.

[David]

No,

[Ethan Klein]

wait, hold on. Stay there.

[Gabe]

No,

[Ethan Klein]

no, this is informative to know what the cameramen who are getting these shots actually look like.

[Jeremy]

Oh, yeah, we get to show me over here.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, that's funny.

[Kate]

Wait.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, no, that's good.

[Nate]

Ethan. You take a photo and it become. It becomes the meme where. What. What he sees and what. What she sees.

[Harley]

True.

[Nate]

Can we get Ethan's face in the. In that shot somehow? So just look in the camera for the meme.

[Hila Klein]

Remove your phone.

[Jeremy]

Look at Ab's camera.

[Hila Klein]

Look at Ab Put your phone away.

[Kate]

Look happy.

[Nate]

Yeah.

[David]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay.

[Caller (Various)]

Thank you.

[Ethan Klein]

That's creepy.

[Nate]

I'll just go ahead and process that.

[Ethan Klein]

I got some funny pics of you, baby. Here, let me pull these. Just let me send these. Thank you. Very nervous. I, I, I flipped the script on you a little bit there.

[Kate]

People are saying they saw Sack.

[Ethan Klein]

No, they, no, they. I'm sure I didn't take that risk.

[Jeremy]

Are you gonna have to show your genitals?

[Ethan Klein]

I don't think so. I don't have to.

[Jeremy]

Your balls come out. Hold on. You like that? That's pretty funny.

[Ethan Klein]

I totally flipped the script, though.

[Nate]

You really did. Damn.

[Jeremy]

We need guidelines for the athletes now.

[Ethan Klein]

Kate sent us this. She said this is why the hugging shots were in the guidelines. So after years of sexualized camera shots, European broadcasters are changing how women athletes are filmed. The goal is simple. Highlight athletic performance, not objectifying angles. So these are.

[Kate]

So these are.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay, these are the good angles?

[Kate]

Yeah, those, yeah. Look good to me. Okay.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, that's, yeah, that's. That's so.

[Kate]

And that was that low angle Again,

[Ethan Klein]

there's no need now show a B, because that's literally what the cameraman is doing. Wait, show up the first. So this, this is literally what you would see. And then, by the way, if ladies out there, if you want to flip the script. Hey, ladies, you know what I'm saying? Do we not have shots from the men's sports?

[Jeremy]

I thought we did the shots from the men's sports.

[David]

No.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, I thought we had compromising shots of men to compare.

[Jeremy]

Nope, just their uniforms.

[Ethan Klein]

Didn't we see

[Kate]

that?

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

She.

[Kate]

You saw in the responses.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah, like, like what we watched of that guy.

[Kate]

Yeah, yeah, that was.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah, it was stuff like that.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, well, I don't think that was intentional. That was just a weird. That was just like a weird fluke. That's like a girl not wearing a bra and then her boobs catch the bar.

[Jeremy]

The boobs coming out.

[Ethan Klein]

What's that, Lou?

[Nate]

Wait, you were talking about the dick?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, the dick.

[Hila Klein]

That would be the example.

[Nate]

That was probably not intentional, but I, that I.

[Hila Klein]

That would be the example of it happening to men, though.

[Nate]

Yeah, that's true.

[Kate]

I, I don't think that. I think that just seemed. No, because there are shots of women that seem very intentionally sexualized. That just seemed like an accident of a man's penis hitting.

[Ethan Klein]

I agree. It was a dick malfunction.

[Kate]

Yeah, yeah. It didn't have anything to do with the user error.

[Ethan Klein]

Did you guys find the one of the guy getting his junk Stuck on the pole vault.

[Kate]

You're saying he was penetrated?

[Jeremy]

No, I did not see. I only seem to be able to find that French guy.

[Ethan Klein]

God, that's crazy, because I have this etched in my memory.

[Kate]

It was a dream, bro.

[Ethan Klein]

No, it was not. It was not a dream. This really happened. Oh, oh.

[Jeremy]

I might have found a different instance. Yeah. Okay. I think this was the Japanese.

[Ethan Klein]

I have no idea. Okay, well, I just remember the dick and balls. What he she sees, what he sees. There. It is pornography. It's not pornography, but it get the job done in a pinch. You got me, Dan?

[Jeremy]

Yeah, I was trying to find a non Facebook link. Oh my God. It's a Facebook link from rush Limbaugh from 2016. Oh, God.

[Ethan Klein]

The hell?

[Jeremy]

For some reason this was the first source I could find here. No, we're not playing the sad music for running up.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, this might be it.

[Jeremy]

There you go. Yes. Yes.

[Ethan Klein]

Wait, I didn't. No, no, no, no, no, no. It's the stick they use. Wait, but let me jump on.

[Nate]

Okay.

[Ethan Klein]

You're sick.

[Nate]

Wow.

[Jeremy]

This is the only other one I could find.

[Ethan Klein]

No, it's the stick. He lands on the stick. You have to jump. Yeah. No, it looks horrific. This one's not as bad as the other one.

[Nate]

Nah, he hits with his knees.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, his knee is rubbing. Although his dick does actually his dick definitely takes a look at it.

[Hila Klein]

Why are they going so loosey goosey?

[Kate]

There should be a taping culture.

[Ethan Klein]

These guys are not wearing underwear.

[Hila Klein]

They gotta do something about that.

[Ethan Klein]

If they were wearing like.

[Hila Klein]

Like but so that. That is why I thought this is the equivalent for men. Or do they have a requirement they can wear?

[Ethan Klein]

I'm pretty sure they're allowed to wear underwear.

[Gabe]

For sure. For sure.

[Jeremy]

They're not allowed to do that.

[Kate]

I.

[Nate]

It's so funny that Rush Limbark's Facebook account still just farming.

[Jeremy]

It's so weird.

[Ethan Klein]

That is very.

[Nate]

I wonder who like.

[Ethan Klein]

I have a feeling this might be it. G might have found it.

[Nate]

Okay, I know.

[Ethan Klein]

This man's life is about to change forever. Moments before disaster trigger warning for him. At 586 the 21 year old.

[Nate]

He's so happy. He'll never be the same.

[Gabe]

Rarefy.

[Ethan Klein]

That's the sphere of the pole vault.

[David]

No.

[Caller (Various)]

Oh.

[Kate]

Oh.

[Ethan Klein]

Isn't it funny?

[Hila Klein]

Oh my God.

[Ethan Klein]

Wait, no. This one either.

[Jeremy]

That's a funny story.

[Nate]

No, but that's 17 maybe not actually.

[Kate]

Oh no.

[Jeremy]

He's in pain.

[Ethan Klein]

Wait, what the hell happened?

[Jeremy]

That was very strange.

[Ethan Klein]

582nd time of asking you get a Slow mo and a. We need a slow mo for this. My boy's wearing underwear. You know what I mean?

[Jeremy]

Yeah, he's.

[Nate]

He's.

[Jeremy]

He's doing it right.

[Nate]

Oh, that could have been so bad.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, so close. Oh, maybe. No.

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Kate]

Goodness.

[Nate]

What do you mean?

[Hila Klein]

Oh, my God.

[Ethan Klein]

That's not the one, though. That's not the one. Still keep looking.

[Gabe]

Is that what. It's cool.

[Jeremy]

Okay. This damn French guy with the hog is just dominating all the search results.

[Ethan Klein]

See, that's funny because I wasn't even

[Dan]

thinking the Sun Dong King, bro.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Golly. Oh, we got more. Thank you, guys. Let's just keep them coming.

[Jeremy]

Let's just keep these. He's Paul Vulcan.

[Gabe]

And he's been special all season long going for the state Olympic record.

[Ethan Klein]

John Flanagan.

[Gabe]

Okay.

[Harley]

No,

[Ethan Klein]

Paul just went directly up his.

[Gabe]

And he's been special all season long going for the state Olympic record. John Flanagan. That ball just went directly up his.

[Jeremy]

A little concerned because it went really far up there.

[Ethan Klein]

Very quickly down there.

[Gabe]

We got our questions about Flanigan for him.

[Ethan Klein]

Wait, no, he cleared the ball. He cleared it though, didn't he?

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

No, that's a huge jump, John Flanagan. Oh, my goodness. Yeah, it changed his fall trajectory too. Eh?

[Hila Klein]

Do we know if he's okay?

[Jeremy]

Yeah, he was great. He was fine after that. Another.

[Ethan Klein]

This might be the one. This might be the one.

[Jeremy]

Oh, no.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, hold on, hold on. Keep them coming, guys.

[Jeremy]

Keep them coming.

[Ethan Klein]

No, no, no. They may never come again, but we will keep them coming. Oh, very good. Very good. Come on. Who you? Oh. We have a Post interview with one of these victims of the pole vault.

[Jeremy]

Millions of people are seeing a BYU student athletes.

[Caller (Various)]

He can laugh about it now, but

[Ethan Klein]

he says if this injury happened just an inch in a different direction, it

[Caller (Various)]

could have impacted the rest of his life.

[Gabe]

And a two News exclusive, Jim Spack spoke to him tonight about the incident.

[Ethan Klein]

Jim, that's a Mormon injury here at byu. He's on the pole vaulting team and

[Jeremy]

he was practicing the end of last

[Ethan Klein]

year here on campus when the unthinkable happened. Zach McCorder is one of the best collegiate pole vaulters in the country.

[Nate]

Just the adrenaline rush.

[Harley]

It's so fun.

[Ethan Klein]

The 21 year old BYU student athlete can easily clear 18ft.

[Nate]

Time slows down, I guess you just second. You just slows down.

[Ethan Klein]

But being this good takes practice. During this practice last September, Zach tried a new hand grip.

[Nate]

I had a great jump.

[Ethan Klein]

It felt so good.

[Nate]

It was the best jump of the day, bro. They're teasing Us. Things can change in a split second. And on this jump, I knew, literally right as I went over the bar, I could just see with precision the

[Ethan Klein]

pole was not falling away from Zach. He was falling into it.

[Hila Klein]

And I just.

[Nate]

I got a good pop on that jump. And so the pole recoiled and just got me in the sweet spot, I guess.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, my goodness.

[Nate]

I started screaming to my dad.

[Ethan Klein]

It's like my boy took a bullet for the. For the love of the game right there.

[Jeremy]

He actually talked like this.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, exactly. Before the accident, I sounded like this.

[Harley]

I.

[Nate]

My scrotum that there was a hole in it.

[Ethan Klein]

He's so Mormon. He's like, maya, huh? Somebody forgot their magic underwear for the day. Oh, my.

[Nate]

Is he saying he had a hole in the scrotum? Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. Did you see the underwear?

[Harley]

Yeah.

[Kate]

No.

[Nate]

He did well in the underwear, but was there a hole in his scrotum?

[Gabe]

No.

[Ethan Klein]

No, no, no.

[Jeremy]

I assume he did.

[Ethan Klein]

Wait, what?

[Hila Klein]

Do you think it punctured him?

[Ethan Klein]

No, I think the sack was intact.

[Nate]

Isn't that what he's saying?

[Ethan Klein]

Hold on. Let's rewatch.

[Nate]

I could just see it with my vision.

[Ethan Klein]

The pole was not falling away from Zach. He was falling into it.

[Hila Klein]

And I just.

[Nate]

I got good pop on that jump. And so the pole recoiled and just got me in the sweet spot, I guess. And the rip didn't stop. Was Zach shorts he was wearing that day? I started screaming to my dad on the hole. Things I probably shouldn't repeat, but basically about my. My scrotum, that there was a hole in it. Yep.

[Hila Klein]

Oh, my God.

[Nate]

There was a hole in his scrotum.

[Hila Klein]

Yes.

[Jeremy]

I would have been happy.

[Kate]

I wonder if you don't wear, like,

[Ethan Klein]

cuffs cups like football players. I was thinking that too, but it's probably hard to run.

[Jeremy]

I think it is probably.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, football players run.

[Jeremy]

Yeah.

[Kate]

No, it's just limiting in the movement.

[Harley]

Yeah, you need.

[Kate]

Yeah, but I think they're all wearing

[Harley]

this free movement as possible.

[Ethan Klein]

I'm not risking that.

[Nate]

Well, he got hit in the scrotum. The cup wouldn't protect the scrotum.

[Ethan Klein]

It goes over the balls.

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

It kind of covers the whole area on the hole.

[Hila Klein]

But that is so awful.

[Jeremy]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

I don't know what a champion. Ironically enough. Zach's dad is his coach. He's also a urologist. He's a hoe.

[Jeremy]

He was born for this moment a lot.

[Nate]

He jumped into action like this.

[Ethan Klein]

Dad is a urologist. My God. He's spraying in the action.

[Jeremy]

It's a convergence of so many talents.

[Kate]

Wow.

[Nate]

He's like, I got this. Never been closer with my father until that day,

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

bro.

[Ethan Klein]

How did you say that without a smile? That's so Mormon of him to say that. And not even of humor.

[Nate]

Never closer with my father until that day.

[Hila Klein]

Oh, my God.

[Ethan Klein]

My father had both his hands on my cock and balls stopping the bleeding. I looked him in the eyes as he held my genitals. I knew I loved him.

[Hila Klein]

He got 18 stitches.

[Jeremy]

Oh, boy. Down there.

[Nate]

He actually got them on the mat.

[Ethan Klein]

His dad, hold on.

[Nate]

Just jumped into action, started stitching it up.

[Ethan Klein]

That's what I imagine happened. 18 stitches. That's like the length of your whole.

[Hila Klein]

That's a lot.

[Jeremy]

It sounds like it really them up

[Ethan Klein]

because 18, that's like a massive wound. Yeah, that's a lot.

[Jeremy]

Ripped the scrotum open.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

And a soft. Not that much space.

[Nate]

Oh.

[Jeremy]

Ow.

[Ethan Klein]

Ooh, brother.

[Nate]

Last Sunday, Zach, awesome.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Nate]

Never been closer with my father until that day.

[Ethan Klein]

Last Sunday, Zach posted the accident to social media and it's been viewed 25 million. What a kid for posting it himself.

[Nate]

Wait, he's saying never been closer to my father until that day. Doesn't that insinuate that it got worse afterwards?

[Ethan Klein]

I think he did a little word,

[Nate]

but I caught it, bro.

[Ethan Klein]

He's saying we've had a falling out since.

[Nate]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Last Sunday's stitches.

[Nate]

Yeah. Never been closer with my father until that day.

[Jeremy]

People calling him a nepo baby.

[Ethan Klein]

He means until that day. He's never been close.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Kate]

You're thinking he said since that day, love.

[Nate]

I feel like it becomes a double negative.

[Gabe]

Why?

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Nate]

Never been closer with my father.

[Ethan Klein]

I've never been closer with my father since that day.

[Kate]

No, he said until.

[Ethan Klein]

No, but I'm saying.

[Kate]

Right. If that's. Yeah.

[Nate]

Research this.

[Ethan Klein]

Yes, daddy.

[Nate]

Until that day last.

[Ethan Klein]

That was the closest we've been so close since you laid hands on my daddy. Zach posted the accident to social media and it's been viewed 25 million times since.

[Nate]

I think it's funny just that people are all around the world are seeing it and they get a laughter out of it.

[Ethan Klein]

And that's what you might call being a good sport. Way to put a positive twist on that one.

[Nate]

Zach really has been a good sport about all this. Again, he can kind of laugh about things now. He is back to full strength.

[Ethan Klein]

He's back on the team.

[Nate]

He's back pole vaulting.

[Ethan Klein]

And we asked him about any long term impacts or can you still get a boner, son? He says he's not really sure about

[Nate]

any Potential fertility issues going forward.

[Ethan Klein]

He says he'll find that out if and when it's time to start having kids. Well, I feel like, especially as a Mormon, that's something you got to know heading in. You're sure you got to disclose to your woman if you're infertile and you

[Nate]

could figure it out?

[Ethan Klein]

Just go through a test. Dude, your dad's a urologist, man.

[Jeremy]

It's a different department.

[Ethan Klein]

I don't think so. Maybe. Actually, maybe it is. I know. Google it. Yeah, guys, it hurts just to watch that video. What a interesting rabbit hole we've gone down, eh?

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

Men of culture, Truly.

[Harley]

I sent another one.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, another. Keep them coming.

[Jeremy]

No, we saw this one.

[Harley]

Oh, you saw it?

[Ethan Klein]

This is the Japanese guy.

[Harley]

Yeah, yeah, sorry, I'm going back to our old.

[Ethan Klein]

I'm looking for ones of the pole. Of them landing on the pole.

[Harley]

Yeah, I'm going. Do you think we watched it on the show, the one you're referring to?

[Ethan Klein]

You know, I don't. I don't know.

[Harley]

Okay.

[Kate]

You know, it's probably on a porn website, bro.

[Ethan Klein]

No, I'm not. I don't look at what port. What kind of porn? You don't even see his dick or anything. Not on l. It's not even funny. It doesn't make sense. Nobody's calling you guys. What's going on here?

[Nate]

We're being lazy.

[Ethan Klein]

Is anybody watching?

[Dan]

It sounds like the phone's off the hook.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, maybe.

[Jeremy]

You fool.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, I did the drop button. I just hit drop.

[Dan]

Yeah, there it is.

[Jeremy]

Oh, you didn't do it. Enough have.

[Ethan Klein]

Let's see. Oh, it's ringing.

[Jeremy]

That was fast.

[Law Enforcement Narrator]

Hello?

[Caller (Various)]

Oh, my God.

[Ethan Klein]

Hi. Oh, my God. How are you? Sorry, I didn't mean to. I didn't mean to, like, make fun of you.

[Hila Klein]

Okay, okay.

[Caller (Various)]

I'm just shocked. I've been calling for a long time.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, well, I'm so glad we got to connect.

[Gabe]

How.

[Ethan Klein]

What can I do for you?

[Caller (Various)]

Oh, I'm just chilling. It's storming in Florida. I'm stuck out here.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, brother, it's got to be hot out there, eh?

[Caller (Various)]

Yeah, it's. It's pretty hot. It's pretty miserable.

[Ethan Klein]

You been to gator land?

[Caller (Various)]

Yes, actually, when you guys were taught. This was tatted by Georgie, by the way. Hi, nice to meet you.

[Kate]

Oh, my God.

[Ethan Klein]

Wait, hold on. Sorry, one sec.

[Caller (Various)]

What'd you say?

[Hila Klein]

That's Georgie, our girl.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, it's a tattoo artist.

[Caller (Various)]

Yeah, yeah, it's me.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, I gotta.

[Gabe]

Oh, wow.

[Ethan Klein]

This Tatted by Georgia, everybody.

[Caller (Various)]

I Finally made it. Oh my God, I'm so glad that my client canceled today.

[Ethan Klein]

Wow. So what about Gatorland?

[Caller (Various)]

Oh my gosh, I love it there. I'm so glad you guys ended up going because I feel like it's so much better than the Disney experience here. Well, listen, there's more to do. I don't know. It's too hot at Disney and I feel like at least the Gator land, you go, you see the gators, you leave. It's fun.

[Ethan Klein]

Exactly. You don't have to over commit. Next time we're in Florida, I'll have to hit you up for a table tap.

[Caller (Various)]

Oh my God, I would die.

[Ethan Klein]

And I don't know if or when that will ever be.

[Caller (Various)]

Yeah, probably.

[Ethan Klein]

Probably never. Yeah, probably never.

[Caller (Various)]

Come back in February and I promise it will be so nice. Like literally nobody that lives here goes to the parks during this time. It's just miserable.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, there it is. That's tatted by Georgie, everybody. Get yourself tat. Florida.

[Caller (Various)]

So nice talking to you guys.

[Gabe]

Flowing.

[Caller (Various)]

Shout out tomorrow.

[Ethan Klein]

Bye. Bye. Thanks for calling. Have a good day. Bye.

[David]

That's.

[Kate]

Love her.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah, she's super awesome.

[Ethan Klein]

Lovely young lady.

[Hila Klein]

The thing is that we went when we went because the kids are on summer break. You know, they don't have school.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, it's. It's was ringing, so I'm good. So, you know, keep come. I can see. I don't want to turn into like a call show, but you know, I see it. It's there. All right, one more. Hello? Can I help you? Ethan Klein.

[Caller (Various)]

Hi, it's Brianna.

[Ethan Klein]

Brianna, yes.

[Caller (Various)]

How are you?

[Ethan Klein]

Do I know you said it like I know you?

[Caller (Various)]

Well, no, not. Not in this lifetime. I guess maybe in another one.

[Ethan Klein]

That's weird. What else happened in the other lifetime between us?

[Caller (Various)]

I don't know. We're besties. I don't know.

[Gabe]

So what.

[Ethan Klein]

How can I help you?

[Caller (Various)]

I just wanted to talk about the whole athlete wearing whatever they wanted things.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay.

[Caller (Various)]

I. Funny story. So I tried out for cheerleading when I was in high school. Didn't make it. I was really bad. So I thought, what's the next sport that has skirts? Because I just wanted to wear the uniform. I didn't necessarily care what sport.

[Ethan Klein]

You want it to look cute.

[Caller (Various)]

Yes, exactly. And so I chose lacrosse because there were no cuts.

[Ethan Klein]

Wait, hold on. Wait. You wanted to wear a skirt?

[Caller (Various)]

Yeah, I did. Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

And Lacoste, because that's like a full. Like you. You wear a skirt and. And that.

[Caller (Various)]

Yeah. And look. Well, back when I did high, like High school cross. It was. We wore skirts. Yeah. Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

A lot of compromising moments, eh?

[Caller (Various)]

Was it.

[Ethan Klein]

Did you feel there were a lot of compromising moments?

[Caller (Various)]

No, because we were required to wear, like, something underneath it.

[Ethan Klein]

Sure, yeah, Yeah.

[Caller (Various)]

I mean, we're Chang, so.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, wow.

[Gabe]

Sure.

[Ethan Klein]

That makes sense. Yeah, makes sense.

[Hila Klein]

All right.

[Caller (Various)]

But nowadays they have them in short, like long, like basketball kind of shirts.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay, yeah, sure. That makes sense, too. Was that. Is that the story?

[Caller (Various)]

Yes.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay, well, that's very interesting. So you wanted. So you. You failed at one sport and you wanted to do another one to continue wearing skirts? If I have it correctly. If I can summarize it correctly, yes. Well, that's. That is fantastic. Thank you for sharing that. All right. Bye. Bye.

[Caller (Various)]

Donna.

[Ethan Klein]

She wanted to continue wearing a skirt between sports.

[Harley]

You said you want to call her. She was supporting.

[Ethan Klein]

Supporting your request, but I'm not. I didn't say anything negative. I'm taking random calls. What do you want? You know what I mean.

[Gabe]

Come on. To me. It's frozen.

[Ethan Klein]

Frozen solid.

[Hila Klein]

Me.

[Ethan Klein]

Frozen backwards.

[Gabe]

Me.

[Ethan Klein]

Some satanic message, probably.

[Dan]

Oh, you're saying play. Yeah, I was doing that earlier.

[Ethan Klein]

Let me hear it. There it is. Very interesting. Well, anyway, it's. It's a good direction. You know, it's. It's. It's been way too long that these men of culture have dominated the broadcast.

[Jeremy]

Taking the menu culture down a peg or two, David shared a tick tock with a compilation of pole vaulting fails and.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, David.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, I was. Man, I was enjoying myself here.

[Ethan Klein]

I could watch. I'm like, way in the pole vaulting zone.

[Jeremy]

This one's awesome. Look at this.

[Ethan Klein]

What the hell did that? Was that man impaled? What happened?

[Jeremy]

I think it went between his legs.

[Ethan Klein]

It went through his body.

[Kate]

Whoa.

[Jeremy]

This is the one we just watched. That's our boy.

[Caller (Various)]

Yeah.

[Hila Klein]

Poor guy.

[Ethan Klein]

That might be the one I was referring to.

[Jeremy]

Oh, that one snapped.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, that was sick.

[Harley]

Okay.

[Jeremy]

Oh, the snapping's crazy. That seems dangerous.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, no. She didn't even hit the pad. How do you keep the. Is that a technique error if the stick breaks?

[Jeremy]

I don't know.

[Ethan Klein]

Because you would. It has to be right, because you would assume the stick is not better made.

[Nate]

I mean, it could. Could be.

[Jeremy]

Both could be compromised, I guess, from using it.

[Ethan Klein]

So dangerous.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

I don't know.

[Nate]

But yeah, if you.

[Ethan Klein]

I love how this guy just gets blasted out of the zone. Like, you know how much weight went down on it if it changed his fall trajectory.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

We don't even know what happened to this guy we got fine. We have no follow up, my boy. Look at this. He gets hailed and a free fall. It changes his falling trajectory. Oh, God.

[Nate]

All I'm saying, we didn't see our interview with.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Whoa.

[Harley]

Whoa.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, the snaps are. Those are fun.

[Ethan Klein]

Whoa. What the hell? Oh, no. Why do they not have padding there? They're like, listen, if you suck this bad, you deserve to hit the concrete. It's kind of like, Gary, why they don't put padding?

[Jeremy]

Yeah, that's your dad.

[Harley]

I think that.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, they want to put. They want to jack it in. I see.

[Harley]

Yeah, that's the hit spot.

[Jeremy]

Oh, poor Gary.

[Ethan Klein]

That looks dangerous.

[Jeremy]

What the hell is that, Dude?

[Ethan Klein]

Wait, what? Golly. We didn't even. What the hell? Wait, I got his.

[Jeremy]

I love that one.

[Ethan Klein]

I wish I could watch that one closer. So he's running. He never jumps. He lets go of the pole, and then the pole gets stuck, and then he runs into the pole like a cartoon character.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Whoa.

[Jeremy]

What the hell?

[Ethan Klein]

The cause of my back pain. No, that was dope.

[Gabe]

All right.

[Jeremy]

Good recovery, yo. The snapping is frightening.

[Ethan Klein]

That guy is kind of the best fail of the day.

[Jeremy]

Good stuff. Very good.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, there we go. The pole vaulters. What an interesting man. What are they doing out there? You know what I mean?

[Hila Klein]

Dangerous.

[Ethan Klein]

It does seem like a little dangerous sport, doesn't it? I don't got enough dick for only fans, bro.

[Jeremy]

You know, straight up.

[Hila Klein]

What.

[Ethan Klein]

How much dick do you need, you think, Nate, to qualify? Well, you need, like, 8 inches, right? You think you need 8 inches to do? Well, like, for. For value, right? I feel like women pay, like, by length. Not really by, like, if people are. I have a feeling if people are subscribing to you for the. The length of your. It's probably dudes. Yes, daddy. Yeah, but, yeah, of course, I don't think women care about that if they're. I don't know, though. I feel like that's. It's probably most dudes consuming only fans. I wonder how many women actually, like, buy services on that. Like, dudes are just the degenerates all around. Have women told you they don't care about that?

[Kate]

Got him.

[Ethan Klein]

Who here? I know a lot of things, Nate,

[Dan]

for the most part.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, for example, have any of you ladies paid for only fans to see an 8 inch here?

[Nate]

Hey, ladies.

[Kate]

No, I've not ever played for only. Only fans.

[Ethan Klein]

There you go.

[Hila Klein]

Okay. Did any of the guys here pay for only fans?

[Harley]

Yeah, but I only settled for 12 inches.

[Ethan Klein]

No, A's not enough.

[Nate]

Oh, yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Next story is very interesting. New UFO docs released.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Whoa.

[Ethan Klein]

The Pentagon keeps dripping out these unsealed UFOs. Oh, my. The aliens are visiting. And unfortunately, it still follows this unbreakable trend of. Oh, my God, look, they're visiting us. And we only have grainy shots, black and white, from 100 miles away.

[Jeremy]

That's just how elusive they are.

[Ethan Klein]

We can't figure it out. Even in 2026, with the incredible technology we have, we cannot figure it out. But here's what we got here. The Department of War. Oh, God, I forgot about that. Just released the fourth Department of War. God, they should have called it the Department of Peace, so they could have completed the whole 1984. Yeah, just really, they honestly. Probably what he. Honestly, Trump's first idea was the Department of Peace, probably. And then somebody's like, we shouldn't call it that.

[Jeremy]

Probably a little too on the nose.

[Ethan Klein]

Ethan, thank you very much. You're welcome, sir. Anytime. Anything I can help with? They released their fourth A load of records under. Under tranche, under pursuit. The first trance was released on May 8th. Scroll down to view the fourth trance released July 10th. I feel like we'll look through. What the hell is this? What is this evidence of, sir?

[Kate]

Is that a drawing?

[Ethan Klein]

A doodle? Certainly looks like it.

[Jeremy]

Spooky.

[Dan]

You just don't want to believe.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, man, this is hype as fuck.

[Jeremy]

I got chills, dude. Chills.

[Ethan Klein]

What is that? Yeah, wait, there's no back button here.

[Jeremy]

What, we're supposed to believe that this is a alien design?

[Nate]

I believe so.

[Ethan Klein]

It's confident. Well, it's confidential.

[Nate]

I've never seen a normal airplane like that. So it must be off this earth.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, it must be from Mars.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Sirius.

[Ethan Klein]

You know what's cool about it? It's in black and white and it's super old and grainy and you can't really tell what you're looking at.

[Nate]

And it says confidential.

[Ethan Klein]

It's just. No, it's crossed out.

[Jeremy]

Not anymore, baby.

[Ethan Klein]

Whatever the this is, that's clearly a glare.

[Kate]

Yeah, that.

[Ethan Klein]

Yo, look at this.

[Jeremy]

What am I even supposed to be looking?

[Ethan Klein]

I don't know. Whatever this is, bro, it's top secret.

[Nate]

That's actually a alien.

[Ethan Klein]

Yo, the dots.

[Nate]

So the dots I am intrigued by.

[Harley]

I will say.

[Ethan Klein]

Why not do it?

[Jeremy]

Find the dots compelling.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, we need a video of the dog.

[Nate]

I think there's like. Like some.

[Ethan Klein]

The hell is this doing?

[Nate]

Some, probably.

[Ethan Klein]

No, what is this?

[Jeremy]

Yeah, what am I looking at?

[Ethan Klein]

Astronauts aboard space shuttle Columbia captured a series of three images of an unidentified object in low earth orbit. Okay, can you get dude like shaky hands over here up in the spaceship? What the hell is this photo?

[Nate]

Well, no, so it's. It's the earth on the left. It's just hyper exposed.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay, I. I see.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, no, it does look like the.

[Ethan Klein]

I see here's.

[Jeremy]

Maybe it's just glare, but it sure looks like the camera was over.

[Ethan Klein]

Looks a little shaky.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, looks.

[Kate]

It looks like it was taking a moment of distress.

[Nate]

Well, they probably saw something.

[Jeremy]

This one is so funny. The kids drawing.

[Ethan Klein]

So this is a. This is a huge. What the Tron. This is. The file contains a US Air Force Air Intelligence Division study. Always a flying objects incidents in the United States study of number 203 dated 1949. Wow, wow, wow. We're really putting 12 year olds in jet fighters, eh?

[Nate]

What did they cross out down there at the bottom?

[Ethan Klein]

Secret.

[Hila Klein]

Oh no, no, no, no, no.

[Nate]

There has to be something serious about this. I believe in that.

[Jeremy]

It was secret.

[Hila Klein]

Secret.

[Jeremy]

Why else would they keep it secret? But not yourself.

[Gabe]

Ask yourself.

[Ethan Klein]

Was the first document too. On the very top. Open with your strongest.

[Nate]

This is page eight. We're missing pages, bro.

[Jeremy]

Well, there is more.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, we got. Here's the videos.

[Nate]

Well covering the important shit up.

[Ethan Klein]

So. So 18 seconds of video footage from an infrared sensor aboard a US military. Well, so the infrared is interesting too because you see a lot. You see lots on infrared. Could really be that you don't see with your naked eye. And so I mean there's a million different ways you could explain like light. Yeah, all kinds of different. Yeah, I mean.

[Jeremy]

I mean that's okay.

[Nate]

So I mean. Yeah, there's maybe something going on here. Something moving. That's.

[Ethan Klein]

It's just something with a light though.

[Jeremy]

It's. It's a lens flare.

[Nate]

But is it like.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, it's right. It could be a lens flare. It's right in the people in the

[Jeremy]

chat are saying it looks like a butthole.

[Ethan Klein]

It's a flying butthole.

[Jeremy]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Infrared butthole.

[Nate]

What if it's a suman on someone's butthole? Kind of. Do you guys kind of see that? Yeah, like it's the sheep.

[Jeremy]

It could be they were trolling in the Air Force. They were born.

[Harley]

Yeah.

[Hila Klein]

When my friend Neil bent over.

[Ethan Klein]

This is Neil. It's historic image of Neil.

[Nate]

The first image.

[Ethan Klein]

Here's another one. The infrared butthole. This one seems more serious. Five minutes of video footage from an infrared sensor aboard a US military platform. This is seen over East China Sea. I wonder who did it.

[Nate]

Okay. I mean, that's.

[Ethan Klein]

But again, it's like, that's a balloon. Yeah. And China just a balloon. China is known for sending spy balloons. They did that recently over America. Chinese girlfriend, you know, China sends spy balloons over America.

[Hila Klein]

I feel like I've heard about that. Yeah, I haven't seen that. Is there a video of that?

[Ethan Klein]

But if just of what?

[Kate]

Life, Just people.

[Ethan Klein]

I think it malfunctioned and went too low, and people were like, what the is that? But again, like, if this is extraterrestrial, like, this is. Has the technology to travel between stars, which means they are on a level of technology so far beyond anything we can even dream of. Hyperspace drives. This is it. They're just cruising. Like, why, what are you cruising for?

[Hila Klein]

But unidentified. Could be like something from China too, right? No, but they're not saying it's alien for sure. They're just saying they don't know what it is.

[Ethan Klein]

The implication is alien. Yeah, but that's true. UFO is unidentified flying object. But didn't they change it to I something? They changed it so it's more specific

[Nate]

now they call it and UAP Identified Anomalous Phenomena.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, see, that's not helpful either. That's generic.

[Nate]

I like uap. There's a UAP right here. I know.

[Ethan Klein]

So this was shot from a military platform. So this thing's not. You can't even be traveling that fast.

[Nate]

What's a military platform?

[Ethan Klein]

It could be a boat, could be a base. You know, who knows? But my point is, this is not good. This is not enough to convince me aliens are visiting the Earth.

[Hila Klein]

But, you know, there's always the kind of people that do want to believe this stuff so bad, and they're like, did you see the new stuff they released?

[Ethan Klein]

It's definitely something, you know, I'm interested, but, like, show me something better than that.

[Nate]

So the thing that really intrigues me is the ticket Tic Tac thing where there's like audio from the people who's, like, driving the jets. And they're like, what? It's here, it's here, it's here. And. And then it just disappears and it shows up like many, many miles away. And they. They like, are trying to follow it and shit.

[Gabe]

That.

[Nate]

That's the one that interests me.

[Ethan Klein]

How's the picture quality?

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Good.

[Nate]

Or it's like a zoomed in kind

[Ethan Klein]

of thing so you can see what it is.

[Nate]

And they're trying to chase it. And it's driving is going faster than the top jet, which I find very that. That one's interesting, but I don't think it's aliens. It's like China or something.

[Hila Klein]

Mm, yeah, I think so.

[Nate]

Or someone.

[Ethan Klein]

What the fuck is this? The fuck is this? Guys, seriously. 2026, back in like 1950s, you could get away with this type of shit. And you had no recourse? Not in 2026. Y' all are just trying to do the same tricks.

[Gabe]

What?

[Ethan Klein]

I feel like if aliens were actually cruising around the Earth, there'd be way more obvious signs. Especially if they're careless enough to get detected by some dork on Earth with, I don't know, some infrared camera. 1947 initial report, project sign. Let's have a look. This is no longer confidential. These are all sightings. They slowed down a lot since our technology improved. The hell I ain't reading all that. Sorry that happened. We're happy for you.

[Nate]

I sent you my favorite video.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, good.

[Nate]

Released by the Pentagon.

[Caller (Various)]

Our.

[Hila Klein]

Our friend Nick Boris. He said I was a Navy photographer and we used to have meetings on documenting UAP. UAVs. I could share some stories from our Etsy.

[Ethan Klein]

Sure, I'd love to hear stories.

[Hila Klein]

You should call our phone.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, it's gonna be hard to get through. I see that thing is. It's buzzing.

[Jeremy]

Probably easier to do it through Discord or something.

[Ethan Klein]

So here is. Yeah, I have seen this one. Let's take a look.

[Gabe]

My gosh.

[Jeremy]

My gosh.

[Ethan Klein]

We're all going against the wind. The wind's 120 knots west.

[Jeremy]

Dead. Look how bro this guy is. Yeah, look at that thing, dude.

[Ethan Klein]

That's not our LNS though, is it?

[David]

It's not.

[Ethan Klein]

Honestly, Fire if you think it's something. Fire.

[Hila Klein]

Why?

[Jeremy]

No. What if they come in peace, bro.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, I need to know, like, let's send this thing the ground and scoop it up. I'm tired of these grainy ass photos. Fire. Also, if you're so dope, if you can travel between stars, you could definitely dodge a missile. Let's be real true, you know?

[Nate]

Right? So by default, the only people who will get hit are humans.

[Ethan Klein]

It's w. Yeah, but if you're also zipping around in some spooky ass technology, you deserve to get fire.

[Jeremy]

Get a missile flung at you.

[Ethan Klein]

If it's aliens, they dodge it, no problem. If it's some Chinese shenanigans. Checkmate America, brother.

[Hila Klein]

See what she's saying? It's rotating.

[Nate]

So the reason they're kind of playing around joking is that they see these all the time and, like, they don't know what it is. And it's like, around the. What's it called?

[Ethan Klein]

Like the aerial craft.

[Nate]

One of those anger.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, the good thing is that at least now we can really see what it is.

[Nate]

And. And they like, keep disappearing and showing up in different places.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, you know what I just realized? It's a tiny little. What do you call the. The empire's fighter?

[Jeremy]

TIE fighter.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. It's a tiny TIE fighter.

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Sick. Yeah. Was that the butthole? The infrared butthole? Oh, spikes is frozen. So, you know, we're. We're.

[Nate]

These things are showing up, like, around every U. S. Military bases and. Weird, bro.

[Kate]

The.

[Nate]

Yeah, that's weird.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, it's China.

[Nate]

Or like, what if like, America's is compromised and that like, it's a hack and it's digital and it's just showing up in their sensors and. And like, China is trolling us or some.

[Ethan Klein]

I think there's a strong chance it's just user air or saying something.

[Nate]

But they see it on the GPS too, and then it disappears.

[Kate]

Ethan, you think it's all. What?

[Nate]

I don't.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, I. I don't believe it's interplanetary. I don't believe it's aliens. Me neither. I don't know what the it is. Carl Sagan told me that it is not possible for aliens to visit Earth unless they're like, well, he's dead, so

[Hila Klein]

shout out to the ghost.

[Ethan Klein]

I mean, the only way interplanetary travel is possible is through the power of God. And if AI Ends up taking over, they could. They could colonize the. The galaxy over like a billion years.

[Jeremy]

So who's to say that it's not that or even just.

[Ethan Klein]

What are they looking for?

[Jeremy]

No, what if it was just a probe?

[Ethan Klein]

It's the technology's. That's what I'm saying.

[Hila Klein]

What, the one little dot that we saw?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[Hila Klein]

I mean, maybe it's a magical dot. Like when you enter it, it's actually a whole world inside.

[Caller (Various)]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

They're not showing, Ooh, some sort of pocket dimension, but it just looks like

[Hila Klein]

a dot to our stupid eyes.

[Jeremy]

That is so interesting.

[Hila Klein]

Thank you.

[Jeremy]

Listen, I'm starting to believe.

[Ethan Klein]

I guess, yeah, that's the only way I would believe that we were visited is if it was robots.

[Jeremy]

Well, certainly plausible, but where's the.

[Ethan Klein]

I want a gpu. I want a gpu. Yes. I want some, like, alien metal. A picture up close of one of these things. You know what I mean? I see something that's unearthly, all I get is these grainy Shots from a million miles away from 1950. Nothing's changed.

[Nate]

There is some people. Bob Lazar claims he has like metal from that's. He claims he has a material he works at like Area 52.

[Ethan Klein]

Is that the guy who.

[Hila Klein]

Wait, Bob Lazar?

[Nate]

I mean he's credited crazy, but just

[Ethan Klein]

show it, show it, Bob.

[Nate]

He claims he has a material that is not meant to be stable.

[Ethan Klein]

Show us, Bob.

[Dan]

It's called like element 157 or something like that.

[Ethan Klein]

Great.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah, but that guy's full of.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Nate]

But no, Bob, Bob, he claims he has it.

[Ethan Klein]

Just show us a picture of it.

[Nate]

I think he has.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay, let's see it.

[Jeremy]

Let's see it.

[Ethan Klein]

Give it to Joe Rogan.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah, they already had so many conversations together.

[Ethan Klein]

Bob Lazar, element 115.

[Hila Klein]

I remember one time I tried listening to one and it's like he just

[Ethan Klein]

like, like he just. Yeah, he's.

[Hila Klein]

He knows how to yap and to like almost get you excited about something but also saying nothing.

[Nate]

Yeah, I'm not like a full on quack. I find it amusing. But yeah, it's probably as he's probably full of.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, there it is.

[Nate]

Look at that, bro.

[Gabe]

And dude, the guy's gotta be nice

[Nate]

to be from outside this world.

[Ethan Klein]

Yo, yo.

[Gabe]

You know why?

[Ethan Klein]

I know. Italian made. Look at that. Welding only advanced space.

[Jeremy]

It's not that part, is it?

[Gabe]

Isn't it?

[Jeremy]

The thing that's sitting on top.

[Ethan Klein]

This is A, B, C and D, Z.

[Jeremy]

Well, I think it's the little thing on the top. No, scroll up and top right.

[Ethan Klein]

What the hell?

[Jeremy]

That little triangle. I assume because it'd be crazy if he's trying to claim that metal plate with the obvious weld on it.

[Ethan Klein]

On top of the. Why is it on this goofy thing?

[Jeremy]

I don't know.

[Ethan Klein]

I don't know.

[Jeremy]

I really don't know.

[Ethan Klein]

You know, just let a scientist look at it. Why only your black ass friends get to play with a very well built gentleman all around, very muscular and handsome

[Gabe]

with a large hog.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, okay, well that I wasn't thinking about. Put the photo up. I was dead. This is it. This is his biggest shredded.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

So.

[Nate]

Okay, I'm. I'm recapping what. So I guess the intrigue of his story is that he told it in 1989 about element 15 and how it could possibly be like synthetically created and be stable. And it wasn't until 2004 when until scientist was able to do it, but he, he claimed.

[Ethan Klein]

He what? That's not a real thing.

[Nate]

That's just his story, though.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, but it's not a real thing. I forgot about this. What is the context of this one, Nate?

[Jeremy]

I think they found an alien in Mexico.

[Kate]

Oh, yes.

[Ethan Klein]

And they said

[Hila Klein]

yes. That is so last year's aliens.

[Ethan Klein]

Wait, the element 115 isn't a real thing.

[Nate]

I have that alien at home full size on my wall.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, hold on. Is it called element 115?

[Nate]

Yeah. I love you.

[Ethan Klein]

So you're saying scientists made it in 2024?

[Nate]

I'm not saying anything. I just quoted this thing.

[Ethan Klein]

You said it was interesting that they did it.

[Nate]

No, I said that. I guess the intrigue of that story would be that.

[Ethan Klein]

Right.

[Nate]

But I think he's bullshit. He's been disproven.

[Ethan Klein]

Let's see here.

[Nate]

There's this skeptic dude that made a whole breakdown on everything he said ever

[Ethan Klein]

says it's real.

[Kate]

It's real. What you're reading.

[Ethan Klein]

Element 115 is called masovium and it's a synthetic element with 115 protons. Scientists create it atom by atom and particle accelerators. But it's extremely radioactive and typically decays in a fraction of a second.

[Nate]

It's unstable.

[Ethan Klein]

No stable form or natural deposit has ever been discovered. Well, Bob Lazar, he predicted that. Says he has it. Well, Bob Lazar predicted it. I guess it's not that crazy a prediction. It's just. It's just saying 115. There's probably 116. It's probably 100.

[Nate]

No, they were talking about the same material. But I'm sure there is something.

[Ethan Klein]

Let's see.

[Nate]

It's debunked.

[Ethan Klein]

He didn't predict that an element with atomic number 115 could exist. Scientists already expected undiscovered element beyond uranium. And the periodic table itself proves a slot for every atomic number. The distinctive part of Lazar's claim was that a stable isotope of element 115 existed and can power or manipulate gravity. Even moscovium isotope actually produced has been extremely unstable. And no anti gravity. Their anti gravity. So Lazar anticipated the later headline. But the scientifically meaningful part of his claim remains unverified. So I guess the 115 part is only natural. I predict there'll be a 120. Bros is solid.

[Nate]

No way, bro. No way.

[Ethan Klein]

Anyway, I love these UFO guys. They're wacky as hell, bro.

[Nate]

Whatever happened to that History Channel dude with a wacky hair in the meme?

[Ethan Klein]

I think he's got a YouTube channel. I think he still had it.

[Nate]

Wait, did he die? Isn't that what happened? The alien guy? Hold on.

[Ethan Klein]

Let's see what Bob Lazar is up to. This is from his page.

[Gabe]

Oh, okay.

[Ethan Klein]

And as you can see, he's. He's being obviously taken very seriously as a scientist with the DeLorean. The DeLorean in his driveway.

[Dan]

That's sick. That's the Back to the Future house.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Wow.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, it is. Oh, you're right.

[Nate]

Okay, first of all, this is.

[Ethan Klein]

I'm freaking out right now.

[Dan]

I don't think I can play this music.

[Ethan Klein]

Right. Where's Bob Lazar in all this? The fuck's he got to do with this? Here. He's on Joe Rogan.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

You said.

[Ethan Klein]

That I also thought was fascinating. There's no seams, so everything looks like it's 3D printer again, right?

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

It comes down to the material, which

[Ethan Klein]

at the time, 3Joe is the only gorilla dumb enough to actually sit across from this guy and act like he's interesting.

[Jeremy]

3D printers weren't real.

[Ethan Klein]

Look at this. This is what's interesting to Joe.

[Gabe]

I don't know.

[Ethan Klein]

Somewhere online, I don't know if it's true. Look at that. Put the photo up. Okay.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

At the time, that really confused me. I said, how did they build this? It must have been built out of

[Nate]

wax or something and then melted,

[Kate]

because

[Ethan Klein]

you can't build anything without seams. And then 3D printing came into existence. And why would you be confused about alien technology so advanced chance that, like, you can't even fathom it. How did they do this? You know, you could build stuff from layers up, and then it was only. This guy's such a clown. I gotta get out of this. All right, that's UFOs, guys. They're here. They're real. I'm a. I'm a party pooper when it comes to aliens visiting Earth

[Gabe]

with a large hog.

[Ethan Klein]

Congratulations, sir. Let me see what the people think. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That one's real, though. Hello, this is Ethan Klein. Are aliens visiting Earth?

[Caller (Various)]

Hello, you've reached the H3 podcast, Black people business hotline. Hello.

[Ethan Klein]

That's what I said. That's my line, not yours.

[Caller (Various)]

Okay, well, this is a black people business hotline, and I'm your black people correspondent.

[Ethan Klein]

Wait, what did you say?

[Caller (Various)]

Black People Business hotline.

[Ethan Klein]

Black people.

[Caller (Various)]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, this. Okay, well, before I ask you any questions, I should confirm, because, I don't know, I could be walking, talking to a white person, and then I'm asking, you know, exactly.

[Caller (Various)]

I'm definitely black enough for this podcast. I'm. I'm Extra Black.

[Ethan Klein]

Black. Okay, listen, I don't know if I'm the guy for this.

[Caller (Various)]

No, you're fine. It's just when you guys talk about black people stuff, AB tries its best to, like, help you guys. And I'm always like, dang, I wish I could just be their correspondent.

[Ethan Klein]

Does ab.

[Caller (Various)]

I just want to be.

[Hila Klein]

Okay.

[Ethan Klein]

Does AV have credentials?

[Caller (Various)]

She's from the streets of Dearborn.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay.

[Caller (Various)]

He has enough cred.

[Ethan Klein]

For sure.

[Caller (Various)]

He has enough.

[Ethan Klein]

All right.

[Kate]

So.

[Ethan Klein]

Well. So, well, Avery is also. We also do have Avery as our black correspondent.

[Caller (Various)]

That's true. But just in case.

[Ethan Klein]

Just in case we need the woman's. The black woman's perspective, in fact.

[Caller (Various)]

Yeah.

[Hila Klein]

Okay.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, I appreciate that. I like to.

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

What's Your name?

[Caller (Various)]

I'm 16, also known as Alexi.

[Ethan Klein]

What did you say about 16?

[Caller (Various)]

Symphonia 16. That's my name. I just. To get my. My puzzle. So you see, Symphonia, that's me.

[Ethan Klein]

I don't understand.

[Nate]

She's saying.

[Ethan Klein]

I'm listening through this. It's a little. Anyway, thank you for that offer, 16.

[Caller (Various)]

Symphonia 16 is my name in chat.

[Hila Klein]

I'm like, okay, yeah, yeah. Yes.

[Caller (Various)]

Okay. Well, anyway, if you need, just holler.

[Ethan Klein]

And I'm so grateful. Do our aliens exist? Visiting Earth?

[Caller (Various)]

They do. And that's none of my business. So they leave me alone. Okay, that's. Have you seen. No, That's. The whole black people. The whole. All of our business is. Nope.

[Ethan Klein]

And is.

[Caller (Various)]

And.

[Ethan Klein]

And on. On behalf of the black community is. Do you guys believe that UFOs are visiting?

[Caller (Various)]

Yes. Because honestly. But they don't. They see our. Our hood, miss. Like, how ghetto we are, and they just leave. You've never seen that? Oh, it's too ghetto. Let me get out of here.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, sure. Okay, that's good. Minding our own business. That's the way to do it.

[Caller (Various)]

Absolutely. That's the best way to go. That's why.

[Ethan Klein]

Anyway, all right, well, thank you so much for calling. I appreciate the service. It's so nice of you.

[Caller (Various)]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

All right, bye.

[Caller (Various)]

Bye. All right, bye. Bye.

[Ethan Klein]

Bye.

[Jeremy]

Our new black correspondent, Symphonia 16, aka Lexi.

[Ethan Klein]

I wasn't sure.

[Hila Klein]

You save that information then, when the time comes.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, if we are actually going to do this, we need. We do. This isn't something I would usually do, but we do need to verify her race.

[Jeremy]

That'd be quite embarrassing.

[Ethan Klein]

I mean, all I can say is I read where she was not black. Yeah. I needed to make sure she's actually Black. And then I read that she was black.

[Jeremy]

Weirdly appropriate sound bite from Trump there.

[Ethan Klein]

How much fun are we having today, huh? Absolutely outrageous.

[Gabe]

Frozen solid. Two episodes.

[Ethan Klein]

Frozen solid. I'm going to go pee. And then we have lots of goofs and gaffes to move on to. So much fun, you guys. Oh, we also have addition with Dan. That could be fun. Trump just admitted Russia targeted Biden in 2020 election. Oh, with misinfo campaign. Trump's teleprompter operator made bets on his speeches and won over 100,000 unhinged body cam meltdown. Oh, that one is crazy. Did anyone watch that?

[Jeremy]

No, Actually, I was. I was looking forward to seeing it.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, sure. I don't believe I have.

[Hila Klein]

That's the one that me and you watched.

[Ethan Klein]

I don't see a link here. I think we need it. Yeah, that's when we watched. It's the best.

[Jeremy]

Oh, no. Ethan was just collapsed. Oh, you clicked the little carrot to twirl it down.

[Ethan Klein]

I see a carrot on my thing. Okay, well, anyway, here it is. This is the best police arrest video I have ever seen of anything ever. And this includes. This includes the succulent Chinese meal. Really everything ever.

[Jeremy]

Wait, it tops. Succulent Chinese meal.

[Ethan Klein]

That's a huge problem. This guy. I'll tell you, this guy is Walter from Big Lebowski in real life.

[Jeremy]

Oh, yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

It's unreal. Unreal. Maybe I'll play this and go to the bathroom and you guys can.

[Nate]

What, just watch?

[Ethan Klein]

Well, no, let's wait for you.

[Jeremy]

Let's wait for you.

[Ethan Klein]

Give me a t. Give me a taste.

[Law Enforcement Narrator]

This is not the aftermath of a violent crime, but a simple trespassing complaint that spiraled out of control when one man unleashed such extreme rage that it tested the. The patience of everyone involved, turning it into a case no one saw coming.

[Nate]

I'm on his side, bro.

[Law Enforcement Narrator]

It began.

[Ethan Klein]

No, I. By the end of this, I was. I'm fully ready to give this guy a show.

[Jeremy]

Free this man.

[Ethan Klein]

He might be a schizophren.

[Jeremy]

Free or boy.

[Nate]

Well, why they arrest him?

[Ethan Klein]

Well, it sounded like it was nothing happened. Trespassing, basically.

[Jeremy]

But, yeah, he was. He was innocent. I haven't seen it yet, but nothing serious.

[Ethan Klein]

He was, like, in his neighbor's yard.

[Hila Klein]

No, no, I think it was a business. They fired him or something like that, and he wanted to go back and. And give them a talk, but he's like, I have. I want to have good words to spread. I have a good message to spread. I just want them to let Me talk to the people there. And I guess. I'm guessing that they don't want to let him in.

[Nate]

Right?

[Hila Klein]

So at first he seems somewhat like maybe. You don't know yet?

[Ethan Klein]

He seems super reasonable at the beginning. Let's set it up here first.

[Law Enforcement Narrator]

2024.

[Harley]

I just ran over from next door. Did she say I have credentials?

[Hila Klein]

Yes.

[Ethan Klein]

Hell, yeah.

[Harley]

That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.

[Gabe]

Thank you.

[Ethan Klein]

I asked why, but she just says it's because you're from Dearborn.

[Law Enforcement Narrator]

We had an H VAC solutions company in Sparta, Wisconsin, called the Monroe County Communications center to report that a former employee was on the property and needed to be trespassed and removed.

[Ethan Klein]

Dude, he's so Walter coated. It's gonna blow your mind.

[Law Enforcement Narrator]

Man Reportedly appeared to be talking to himself and was not actively threatening anyone at the moment.

[Kate]

Yeah, God forbid you're talking to yourself.

[Jeremy]

God forbid.

[Nate]

I think this is a false arrest.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, we gotta.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, it just started.

[Jeremy]

You got a free.

[Nate]

I'm just sharing my opinion.

[Ethan Klein]

No, I'm ready to give this guy a show. And maybe even alongside the other two, the pant, the poo poo panties, bathroom sec, porn activists.

[Jeremy]

Oh, right.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Nate]

Well, let's put against each other Professor

[Law Enforcement Narrator]

X warmed dispatchers that he had made threats towards staff in the past and had also posted threatening statements online. As police officers headed toward the company property, they had no idea they were about to confront an extremely aggressive and violent man.

[Jeremy]

Okay, editorializing.

[Nate]

Yeah, Way to go. And why is he a suspect?

[Gabe]

Good.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

How are you?

[Hila Klein]

So I think the business called on him.

[Dan]

Is he doing an audit or.

[Ethan Klein]

No, he was fired.

[Dan]

No, he's not doing an audit.

[Ethan Klein]

No, he was fired. He went to talk to them and they said he was talking to himself and scaring them. And so they just called because they didn't know what to do.

[Jeremy]

That sounds like their problem.

[Gabe]

You were over there.

[Nate]

What's up?

[Gabe]

Glad you're here.

[David]

Come on over.

[Gabe]

I got great news for you.

[Ethan Klein]

Just come over here.

[Gabe]

Who cares?

[Ethan Klein]

All right.

[Gabe]

Awesome. I appreciate that. My man. What's going on?

[Ethan Klein]

He sounds like Walter.

[Gabe]

Appreciate that.

[Ethan Klein]

My man.

[Dan]

Dude, it's good to see you again.

[Nate]

Yeah, you too.

[Ethan Klein]

They know each other again.

[Dan]

Well, all right.

[Ethan Klein]

I'm sorry.

[Kate]

Aren't they neighbors?

[Ethan Klein]

I don't know what's real and what's not.

[Jeremy]

It's hard to tell.

[Hila Klein]

That's his old workplace.

[Harley]

That's okay.

[Gabe]

These got the door. They got the balls to lock the doors on me. Let me tell you a story, buddy. So I busted my. I was. I was here for about nine months. I quit on Monday, asked for divorce on Tuesday. Oh my God. Hell, for the third time on. I believe it was Thursday. Thursday. We'll get to that later. Anyway, there's really good news. I'm gonna. I'm gonna request everybody to get together for a little impromptu meeting. And I'd love it if you came in and listen, I'm gonna ask these guys for permission if they'll open the door. I busted my. This place and he's useless.

[Ethan Klein]

I thought he was gonna say like 30 years.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, nine months was surprising.

[Gabe]

Won't let me in.

[Ethan Klein]

What do you need to get in there for?

[Gabe]

I want to talk to him. About what? About the great opportunity that has been brought to them today. That they will blow their damn brains out themselves willingly in three hours if they don't hear this message and I go tell somebody else first. That's how they're gonna blow their brains out, buddy. I'm lying not one iota.

[Law Enforcement Narrator]

While the officer was still reaching the location, the man reportedly attempted to enter the business.

[Dan]

They even gave him a belly, bro.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, and a bandana and everything.

[Law Enforcement Narrator]

When he was unable to get inside, he became increasingly aggressive.

[Jeremy]

That door did not look like that.

[Nate]

He didn't. How do we know? There's the proof.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, that's true. Yeah, it's all hearsay. You're right.

[Jeremy]

Seems.

[Ethan Klein]

Why do you feel the body cam for it exactly? They clearly have the body cam at

[Law Enforcement Narrator]

staff members three my boy nearby window. He then began walking toward the front of the building. The public entrance was located just as the first officer arrived on scene.

[Jeremy]

Well, I.

[Ethan Klein]

They don't believe that they're gonna let

[Jeremy]

you into the building.

[Gabe]

Really?

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Yeah.

[Gabe]

Are you kidding me?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[Gabe]

I mean it sounds like it is very, very disgusting.

[Jeremy]

True.

[Gabe]

That is very disgusting. I'm assuming there is some mic here. There is, yeah. Write me a ticket. You see that flag pole?

[Ethan Klein]

The Walter is crazy over the line

[Gabe]

because I have passion you people don't recognize.

[Ethan Klein]

Why are we yelling or swearing though?

[Gabe]

Because I'm very upset. Because I sacrifice like you will not believe for this company. If I get from everybody in this country right now, you'd be on your knees kissing my. You would will it. You would willingly lick my.

[Ethan Klein]

You like the Russians. Stop. Oh, got a little homophobic.

[Nate]

We don't know what he said.

[Ethan Klein]

The hell it was believed. It's covered.

[Nate]

It was believed.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, the caption, yes, if you like figs redacted. I don't like people that like figs. It's a weird fruit.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah. I don't like it.

[Ethan Klein]

Hey, it's got lots of seeds. It's just like got lots of seeds.

[Nate]

And also mind you, they refer to this entrance as a public entrance. Would obviously gives him the right to be there.

[Ethan Klein]

Yes. Public property.

[Nate]

Yeah.

[Dan]

148.2.

[Hila Klein]

That's right.

[Ethan Klein]

It is.

[Gabe]

You want me to you tell. All right, here's the deal. I'll make it. Wait. I'll give you guys the deal.

[Caller (Various)]

Deal?

[Nate]

What are you talking about?

[Gabe]

I'll give you a deal.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

All right.

[Gabe]

You guys gamblers?

[Ethan Klein]

No. You want. You guys gamblers? No. You want to make a bet?

[Caller (Various)]

No.

[Ethan Klein]

I will. You guys then talk about.

[Nate]

Put your hands in your pockets. Thank you. Am I under arrest soon right now

[Gabe]

because I was impassioned to come and bless these people's day. Fridays are a fun day. True. It's going to be excellent.

[Ethan Klein]

Shout out Friday.

[Jeremy]

Shout out to Friday.

[Ethan Klein]

Friday we are.

[Jeremy]

We love Friday.

[Kate]

It's special.

[Gabe]

And it was planned pristinely for that occasion.

[Nate]

What was going to be special about it?

[Gabe]

I was going to enlighten their minds with some wonderful, brilliant news that you guys are going to be so embarrassed if you squash.

[Nate]

Can I ask what it is?

[Ethan Klein]

First one.

[Gabe]

We're all going to take a big breath, right? We're going to facts.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, Kate's asking who's Walter? Because I guess Big Lebowski.

[Jeremy]

Oh, cancel After Dark. You need to go watch that movie

[Ethan Klein]

instead of today's show, which I assume everybody's seen. There's a Vietnam vet named Walter who's very funny character.

[Jeremy]

John Goodman plays him.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. And it's just this guy is literally him irl. I can't get over it.

[Jeremy]

Just imagine an angry John Goodman and you got most of the way there.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[Nate]

And right now he's de escalating. He's like, let's relax. Let's take a step back.

[Hila Klein]

That eye roll he did to them.

[Jeremy]

The eye roll was so sassy. That was so funny.

[Gabe]

We're gonna have some fun for a change, all right?

[Jeremy]

Hell yeah.

[Gabe]

Or you can run around. Stop being like a plugged up toilet. Oh, you can't say that. You can't say that. Bull.

[Law Enforcement Narrator]

While in route, the sergeant asked dispatch to check the man's driving and criminal status, if any. Dispatch advised that the man's class D and class M driving privileges were both revoked. But soon both the sergeant and the responding officer are.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, what about. He thought this was a mayor B license.

[Nate]

Well, he might have walked the bike over there. Who knows I don't have proof.

[Jeremy]

Rolled it over.

[Law Enforcement Narrator]

He traveled to realize that his revoked license is going to be the least of their concerns.

[Gabe]

I only just emptied my. I'm telling you, keep your hands on your pockets for me.

[Ethan Klein]

Stop.

[Gabe]

There it is.

[Nate]

Stop putting your hands.

[Gabe]

Stop. There's nothing in there.

[Ethan Klein]

I mean I'm kind of on his side. There's nothing on your. In his pockets. You emptied them. Let the man.

[Harley]

You know.

[Ethan Klein]

Let the man.

[Hila Klein]

You never know.

[Ethan Klein]

Let the man be casual.

[Hila Klein]

They never know. They gotta be prepared.

[Ethan Klein]

He just showed him.

[Caller (Various)]

He empty.

[Hila Klein]

I've seen enough of these. When there's somebody trying to reach for a gun.

[Ethan Klein]

He just wants to be casual and put his hands in his pocket because he feels awkward if his pants aren't in his pocket.

[Hila Klein]

You sound like a day one body cam footage guy.

[Ethan Klein]

Ethan, he emptied his pockies. His pockies.

[Gabe]

Go ahead, dig your fingers in there.

[Nate]

I don't want to.

[Gabe]

Why?

[Ethan Klein]

Keep your hands out of your pocket.

[Gabe]

Dig your fingers in. There's nothing in there. In there. We don't know that.

[Law Enforcement Narrator]

I don't know that.

[Gabe]

I'll show you if you would be those chicken got that gun. You shoot me in the face right now. Grab for true.

[Jeremy]

Stop.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, he just put his hands back there right for him. They said can I pat you down? And he's just.

[Nate]

And mind you, he was never asked to leave by these police officers.

[Ethan Klein]

That's true.

[Jeremy]

So true.

[Dan]

And he's complying?

[Nate]

Yep.

[Ethan Klein]

They just said they're not going to let you in.

[Jeremy]

Kind of.

[Ethan Klein]

Although he's driving without a license. I guess they got him on that again.

[Nate]

They don't know if he drove.

[Ethan Klein]

David, our lawyer. TNP would say there's no evidence he drove.

[Nate]

You could actually just drive that motorcycle around on that private parking lot because it's not a roadway.

[Jeremy]

I don't know if that's true, but it sounds right.

[Ethan Klein]

It's true, obviously. And the guy's having mental health issues. It's possible he doesn't.

[Jeremy]

Seems clear of mine to me.

[Ethan Klein]

It's possible that he doesn't remember correctly and that he actually parked it there months ago before his license expired.

[Dan]

I think he's more awake than he's ever been

[Gabe]

right now. Here's my thanks for saving the United States of America, people. But I'll do it for you all over again. I don't give a.

[Ethan Klein]

Are you a veteran?

[Gabe]

Nope,

[Ethan Klein]

he's not a veteran. He's a two time felon. Same thing, right?

[Dan]

He's a sovereign citizen.

[Gabe]

Outlaw mother, craziest. You've ever over again. I don't give a.

[Ethan Klein]

Are you a veteran?

[Caller (Various)]

Nope.

[Gabe]

Two times felon, old baby.

[Ethan Klein]

Outlaw mother.

[Gabe]

The craziest you've ever dreamt of if you knew what you were doing.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, Walter was actually a vet, so he had a reason.

[Jeremy]

Right, right, right, right.

[Ethan Klein]

Actually, Walter is more. Is a more admirable character. Yeah, that's that. Play that. That's Walter.

[Gabe]

See what happens?

[Ethan Klein]

You play that.

[Gabe]

See what happens, Larry? What happens when you a stranger in the ass, Larry?

[Ethan Klein]

That's Walter. Do you have somebody in call to come pick a motorcycle up for you?

[Gabe]

Yeah, actually. If you guys touch that thing, you're gonna regret it the rest of eternity.

[Ethan Klein]

I highly doubt it.

[Gabe]

You want to bat me?

[Jeremy]

He loves.

[Gabe]

I have sacrificed my for you miserable cowards.

[Ethan Klein]

He didn't even serve, so I don't know what he's talking about. Here we go.

[Gabe]

You a Russian? You suckers piss me the off. You better run, mother.

[Nate]

What's the arrestable offense, sir? Am I under arrest?

[Gabe]

Yeah. Am I being.

[Jeremy]

Am I being detained?

[Ethan Klein]

Exactly.

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Nate]

What's. What's arrestable offense, bro?

[Harley]

You.

[Gabe]

I live next to you. I am.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, so there actually are neighbors. They're actually neighbors.

[Hila Klein]

Maybe that's why he said.

[Ethan Klein]

But the cops say. I understand.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, that doesn't necessarily. When he got De escalation. Sure, sure, I understand.

[Harley]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, he definitely thinks they're neighbors.

[Jeremy]

That's. Yes, I agree on that.

[Gabe]

Telling you something. You are gonna kiss my ass. You. I did this for you, America.

[Jeremy]

I really want to know what he has to share. He still has.

[Ethan Klein]

He won't tell us.

[Hila Klein]

I know.

[Jeremy]

I really want to know what he has to share.

[Ethan Klein]

It's that good.

[Jeremy]

He said people were gonna shoot themselves if they didn't hear it.

[Hila Klein]

Yep.

[Gabe]

Boys, take me away. Land of the free and humble the brain. Take me away.

[Nate]

You're under disorderly conduct.

[Ethan Klein]

Disorderly conduct.

[Gabe]

You. You miserable coward.

[Ethan Klein]

Stop before you make this.

[Gabe]

I don't care. Go ahead. Do whatever you got. No, you're not. Don't you touch it. Oh, you got to make sure. That's so up perfectly.

[Ethan Klein]

I got 50 minutes getting that on perfectly.

[Gabe]

Well, you got to make sure. I spent 15 minutes getting that on perfectly. You know why? I got passion. You miserable coward, you.

[Ethan Klein]

That's such a walk through life, you two. I got the.

[Gabe]

I got it. My finger.

[Nate]

I don't think it'll stick. I don't think. Disorderly with stick. I think he's.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, no, he's way too calm for that.

[Ethan Klein]

In a Parking lot. Who. Who's he bothered?

[Dan]

He also hasn't been a. A Miranda guys though, yet either.

[Jeremy]

So true.

[Nate]

Very good point.

[Ethan Klein]

Good point.

[Gabe]

Are you sure? Take them cuffs off. Right. In a second. Get on your knees. You better start listening, boy.

[Ethan Klein]

By the way, if this. If this episode gets yellowed, I know that the cursing is bleep, so hopefully it doesn't matter, right? Yeah, there's a lot of F bombs

[Kate]

that.

[Gabe]

Red light. Red light. Mother godless pig. You copper.

[Jeremy]

What's like.

[Ethan Klein]

He goes, what's to eat? I'm hungry.

[Jeremy]

Old timey way of saying that.

[Gabe]

You copper.

[Nate]

Hey, C, what's supp.

[Gabe]

I eat. I'm hungry.

[Ethan Klein]

What's to eat? I'm hungry.

[Law Enforcement Narrator]

As he proceeded to lose his A record.

[Ethan Klein]

That's not professional.

[Law Enforcement Narrator]

Too much editorial that the man's driving privileges had originally been revoked following an OWI related incident in 2020. It also revealed that he already had two prior convictions for operating after revocation since his license status was revoked in October 2021 and again in May 2023.

[Ethan Klein]

I'm gonna go to the bathroom. I can't wait anymore. But I. Maybe I'll just skip forward a little bit. Yeah, you guys can see. His stamina. Oh, yeah, you can hear him on the cam outside the car with the windows up.

[Hila Klein]

Nice.

[Ethan Klein]

Doctor used to be my neighbor.

[Hila Klein]

My neighbor.

[Gabe]

Okay, okay, you stinking rat. Goes.

[Dan]

They had to give him two cuffs because he's so big.

[Gabe]

Maybe I can find a couple broomsticks to use on each other. You Joy boy. Mother. What do we want.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

We want to do.

[Ethan Klein]

I'm going to try to contact him. Do we want to ask him or. Excuse me, sir.

[Jeremy]

I can excuse the three DUIs, the disorderly conduct, the trespassing, the breaking and entering, and the threatening proud felon. Yeah, but I draw the line at the homophobia.

[Gabe]

That's not a.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay, I agree. I mean, that's fair. I'm going to be right back. The meat's frozen solid.

[Jeremy]

It sure is, man. It is frozen solid.

[Hila Klein]

Oh, okay.

[Ethan Klein]

Those look really bad. And they are. And I'm really sore from yesterday's squats.

[Jeremy]

You were doing it. You're squatting.

[Ethan Klein]

We're just trying to keep our muscle. I know. It's really bad. Don't laugh at me.

[Hila Klein]

You don't have. That's by choice.

[Ethan Klein]

I don't know.

[Jeremy]

Helps with the balance. I think. That's what Ethan says when he's squatting on it, if you know what I mean. Hey, listen, Rick Derula, 13 gifted 20 podcast memberships earlier and Bara plays 918, gifted 10, and Capricorn Nemo gifted five. So thank you to all three of you. That was very, very much appreciated from you all.

[Hila Klein]

Thank you so much.

[Jeremy]

And let me thank some of the people who have been donating via super chats as well. Also, I appreciate all the people that have been donating with the new method, which are those fun little stickers in the chat. I've been seeing lots of Unclert, I gotta say, shout out to YouTube for including Unclert as one of the options. It's become very handy here on the H3 show. All right, let's take a look. Can I get a shout out for my beautiful girlfriend Anne? We watch every episode together. Main and after Dark.

[Ethan Klein]

Dark Love.

[Jeremy]

Also, Zach, could you hit us with the sound bite of Dan mumbling? Do you know what that. I don't know what that means.

[Dan]

Dan.

[Jeremy]

Sound bite of me mumbling and mumbling.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah, that one. So great.

[Dan]

I love that one.

[Jeremy]

That was from Danny Lopez. Donated $20 to shout out his girlfriend. And shout out to you both. Thank you both for watching together. Oh, there's an uncle right now from Johnny Ohms. What up, Johnny? Johnny Ohms, uncle tatted by Georgie earlier said, what are we gonna do without Jugga Joe's? Yeah, I don't know.

[Nate]

I don't know.

[Jeremy]

Tomorrow was asking the same thing this morning, Leah MFB donated $20 and said, I'm currently getting a tattoo. Happy I can watch my favorite show to keep my mind off the pain. And then they hit a us with the upside down smiley face, which we long ago determined was like, kind of like a. A red flag. I remember. What was it? Oh, I think it was because of James Charles, actually. But I think in this context, we'll. We'll let it fly. Little Fright donated and said, how am I supposed to work when my meat is frozen solid? Peace and love. Solid and meat.

[Gabe]

The meat's frozen solid.

[Ethan Klein]

Frozen solid.

[Nate]

It's very good.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

Razor, back to you. Am I crazy? Did Ethan get a tan? Well, we tried to give him a tan on Wednesday. I don't know if you caught that. It didn't work very well, though. Well, I don't think it really stuck, but maybe it did a little bit.

[Hila Klein]

I think it did, though.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Yeah.

[Hila Klein]

By your question. Yeah.

[Jeremy]

If they're noticing.

[Nate]

Yep.

[Jeremy]

Well, thank you. Thank you. Razorback to you. Hey, tree fam. Ethan's been taunting us with that Teddy Fresh coaster the entire episode. I think Teddy Fresh needs a restock. Love the fun household items. Like the spoon rest. Anywho, that's all. Love, you, fam. That's from Ellen Berady.

[Hila Klein]

Thank you. It was actually not planned, but we got the stables, and then we realized, wait, we need coasters. And so I ran to look for something, and I found these old samples that we never made. So there's this kind, which is, like, felt.

[Jeremy]

That's cute.

[Hila Klein]

They're pretty cute. And then there's also this kind, which is, like, the acrylic.

[Gabe]

Nice.

[Hila Klein]

But if you guys remember the ones we released, it was kind of like a combination of both of these. It was the bear shape in this material.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

More home items coming in September, says Galia. So there you go. More on the horizon.

[Ethan Klein]

And hello.

[Jeremy]

And final one. And then we'll get back into this wonderful video from Dre, breaking my donation cherry because I turned 27 today. Man, I was watching you guys when I couldn't legally buy a beer. Wow, Zach, for ten smacks, perhaps I could get a Stallone. The meat is frozen.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, you're going to get plenty of those, my friend.

[Dan]

You want to try and line up again?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[Dan]

All right. You ready for this one?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[Dan]

Ready.

[Nate]

Hey,

[Ethan Klein]

you could do it like.

[Dan]

Like, 1, 3, 2, 1.

[Nate]

Hey,

[Ethan Klein]

we'll get there. You want to do some more?

[Jeremy]

No, we should probably Rosen with the video. Unless you want me to.

[Nate]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

I like to acknowledge the people just for maybe, like, another two minutes.

[Jeremy]

Okay. Will Teddy Fresh ever do baby clothes? I'm 37 weeks, and I can't find anything cool for my baby boy, so. Love y'.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

All.

[Jeremy]

That's from Strawberry Olive.

[Hila Klein]

I'll tell you what. I have tried it, but we ran into issues, because the businesses that actually do baby clothes, they do, like, lots of quantities. You know, they run big numbers, and so they get better pricing. And for us to do it with our manufacturers, who don't usually do, came out pretty expensive. So you probably wouldn't want to spend what we would have to charge for something that you can find for cheaper.

[Jeremy]

Math didn't math.

[Hila Klein]

It's just. It was unfortunate because we did try. We came up with some cute designs, but then the costing was just coming too high.

[Ethan Klein]

Eli saw this post on the subreddit. Disney scammed us as a Disney adult. Getting swapped from Animal Kingdom Lodge to Coronado Springs is heinous and diabolical. Whoa.

[Hila Klein]

Okay.

[Ethan Klein]

And that's someone who has stayed and loved at Coronado. They got.

[Hila Klein]

See, people were saying you guys didn't do research. I mean, my research was about the wilderness lot.

[Ethan Klein]

That's the one for the family.

[Hila Klein]

Supposed to be very family oriented. And we got like.

[Ethan Klein]

And it did look really fun. And when we walked in, it was pretty like the. You're in like this massive lodge with a giant roof. It was pretty impressive.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah. And then we went to the Coronado where it seems like there's a bunch of conventions there. It just kind of felt like you. You go there on like a business trip, bro.

[Ethan Klein]

You know what? They. They were having a convention, bro. Mobility scooters. Did they end up doing anything nice for you guys? I said mobility scooters. Children in them. Them everywhere. I swear to God. There was kids everywhere in mobility scooters while we were there. Obviously it's not a problem, but it was just strange. And he was like, what's going on with all the. I was like, oh, yeah, they are. It's like every other person. Someone in a. In a mobility scooter. Oh, yeah. See how beautiful.

[Hila Klein]

That's where we.

[Ethan Klein]

It was like awe inspiring. I was like, oh, my God, this is gorgeous. Pretty cool. Sorry, Lena, you were gonna. What did they do for us?

[Kate]

Oh, yeah.

[Caller (Various)]

Just because of the inconvenience.

[Ethan Klein]

Did they do anything? Well, so they didn't charge us for that first night.

[Hila Klein]

They didn't charge for the first night. Oh, yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Which is okay, but they said they were like, oh, the other one is more expensive, so you're getting like upgraded. It did not feel like an upgrade, so. God, I wish I could show you. Hold on, I think I can show you. Coronado Springs. And then they called it. We were in Unit Lodge 1, Casitas 1. You got to see what this fucking place looks like, bro. Oh, the pictures look so much nicer than it is.

[Hila Klein]

Isn't that always the case here?

[Ethan Klein]

This is a good one. This. This kind of gives you an idea of like the motel ness that it is like, doesn't it just look like a motel?

[Jeremy]

Yeah, it's a lot less impressive than that.

[Hila Klein]

Oh, God. It was so many of these. And they all look the same. Like, my mom was with us and if she needed to go to the room by herself, she couldn't because she would not be able to figure it out. I had to walk her to our room so that she wouldn't get lost.

[Ethan Klein]

Show the lodge.

[Hila Klein]

And everything was like a walk.

[Ethan Klein]

Just show them side by side where we ended up. This is what we paid for.

[Hila Klein]

Before you ask him to show it,

[Ethan Klein]

I wanted to show the lodge lobby. Ah, whatever.

[Jeremy]

But you're trying to get me to pull. Yeah, yeah, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I was slow on the uptick there.

[Dan]

It's like the Motel 6 office.

[Ethan Klein]

Literally. It's like. Like look at this. Anyways, Motel 6, that building is going to be condemned. No, it. And like that's. No, it is. It literally looks like this is what it reminded me of is like this type of motel.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, I got you.

[Kate]

I know.

[Hila Klein]

And it also pretty deserted. Like you walk by by a bunch of rooms and they all seemed empty. They're all empty from what I could tell. This is not very magical.

[Jeremy]

No, there's no magic.

[Hila Klein]

No magic.

[Jeremy]

There's no magic there.

[Ethan Klein]

Listen, listen. The price difference between this room and this room is extraordinary.

[Jeremy]

Right?

[Ethan Klein]

And the look. Not that different.

[Jeremy]

Fair enough.

[Dan]

And check out anytime you like. But you can never leave.

[Ethan Klein]

How much is it for a Motel 6 night?

[Dan]

I think like $65.

[Ethan Klein]

$65?

[Hila Klein]

Whoa.

[Ethan Klein]

We paid a lot more.

[Dan]

With inflation it might be 100 nowadays. I haven't been there in a minute.

[Ethan Klein]

Have you stayed there?

[Dan]

No.

[Jeremy]

Stayed at many Hotel Sixes over the years or motels.

[Ethan Klein]

Are they. Is it like decent? Clean?

[Jeremy]

They're fine.

[Dan]

A little scared they'll leave the light on for you.

[Ethan Klein]

I don't want the light on. Trying to sleep. That's their slug.

[Dan]

We'll leave the light on for you.

[Ethan Klein]

No, don't do that. Anywho, where were we? We were watching this. I'm just gonna go watch a little chunk from the middle. Then we'll move on.

[Jeremy]

Okay.

[Ethan Klein]

Just contact the guy.

[Gabe]

I hate you. You said you wanted us to come moving by. Yeah. He's the only one allowed to lay a finger on it. Don't let any of you touch it. I'll be. I. I'm going to anyway. I can't wait to get a hold of you two. I'm going to knock your stupid heads together. Knock some damn sense into you jar. You have no idea what you're doing. You better run. I'll skull you. Yo.

[Ethan Klein]

The stamina is unbelievable. He keeps this up for like non stop.

[Gabe]

This intensity with your entangling Devil's. That ain't what the law's for, dumbass. It's not to rob you.

[Ethan Klein]

You listen. My favorite is my favorite shot. They're laughing. My favorite shots are when you can hear them from outside with everything closed.

[Hila Klein]

Recognize you?

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

If you can't get a hold of them.

[Nate]

Touch base with them with the bike.

[Harley]

If they want to.

[Nate]

I assume they want to off the property.

[Jeremy]

Because I'm supposed to be in the property.

[Nate]

And if that's the case we'll just push up. Stuff the just parking on the street over there.

[Gabe]

I haven't slept in aing month.

[Jeremy]

Have you slept in a month?

[Gabe]

Just relax, old girl. And suckers so much as look in your direction, I'll yank their out backwards and then stuff it on the other side. Damn it, I hate you. You kids.

[Caller (Various)]

Roaring?

[Gabe]

Dude, I'll tear this apart and I'm coming for your neck. You think you got it in for the usa? I got news for you, brother. I got Everybody's back. Except YouTube is not very cooperative. Yeah, he's not very cooper out of my godamn country.

[Jeremy]

His country.

[Kate]

Why you want him in your car?

[Nate]

Cuz you're in here.

[Gabe]

You buggy, you bug. Ey, who's that useless call you irritant. You are aing constant pain in my. I never should have created you. Not wanted.

[Jeremy]

I think he thinks he's God. Yeah, I'm starting. I'm starting to get meth vibes as this goes on. I think he's been high, super high on meth for like weeks because he said he hasn't slept in a month. Yeah, and. And like the insane delusions and stuff, this is.

[Ethan Klein]

This. Maybe it's fine.

[Hila Klein]

Isn't that. What?

[Jeremy]

Or he's fine. Or he's actually.

[Ethan Klein]

You're saying if he's. If he's just strung out on meth, it means he might be fine once you get sober.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, hopefully.

[Nate]

Yeah, I think I don't see any issues still. I haven't seen anything illegal.

[Ethan Klein]

Send him back to work.

[Dan]

These are easy charges to get dropped.

[Nate]

They're gonna all be dropped. You're right.

[Ethan Klein]

I think you hear his charges at the end. I think they. He went back to work the next day.

[Law Enforcement Narrator]

Ultimately, the man was charged with felony battery, threat to an officer times two, misdemeanor, possession of a controlled substance, disorderly.

[Ethan Klein]

They did find a pill on him of some sort.

[Law Enforcement Narrator]

And operating while revoked, he was later released on a 250 cash bond.

[Ethan Klein]

250.

[Gabe]

Let's go.

[Jeremy]

Let's go.

[Ethan Klein]

I didn't even know they did bonds for 250.

[Jeremy]

Why even bother at that point?

[Dan]

What collateral do you have to put up for 250 bucks?

[Nate]

I think it's 15 a paper clip.

[Law Enforcement Narrator]

He pleaded guilty due to a no contest plea of one count of battery, threat to an office.

[Kate]

Oh, look.

[Law Enforcement Narrator]

Remaining charges were dismissed.

[Jeremy]

Hell yeah.

[Law Enforcement Narrator]

Ultimately he was only sentenced to pay a 500 fine.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, so he was. 500 bucks. That's it. That's all it costs. Easy.

[Law Enforcement Narrator]

That works.

[Jeremy]

500 represent.

[Ethan Klein]

That's so awesome.

[Kate]

Some.

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

My boy didn't deserve anything worse than that.

[Nate]

And he probably don't even have to pay that fine, by the way.

[Ethan Klein]

500. It's like, good luck getting that for me.

[Nate]

No, but you don't have to pay that. That's fine. Yeah.

[Jeremy]

What are they gonna do?

[Nate]

No, like, actually, I don't think you

[Jeremy]

have to pay that.

[Nate]

That's.

[Gabe]

Chill, Arab. Oh, rip your. Can we just.

[Nate]

I think you.

[Jeremy]

I love the roaring.

[Gabe]

I swear I'll eat you alive right this second. You.

[Ethan Klein]

This is gonna be a trap. Used to be my neighbor. Yeah, he used to be his neighbor. So, anyway, pretty. Pretty fun. The whole thing is worth a watch, you know.

[Gabe]

Wow.

[Nate]

I'm glad they didn't go down hard on him. We need him out working again.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, I mean. I mean, listen, he's got a lot of energy. He's probably. Probably productive when he's focused on work.

[Jeremy]

Right.

[Dan]

He might have a career in the wwe big time.

[Jeremy]

Oh, yeah, we see that.

[Nate]

That's. That is the background to most of the people that work there already. Fellads fell. Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

What else we got? It's just one of those days, Dan. You want to take over, do a little dishing, keep us up to date on our politics?

[Jeremy]

I don't. We're a little low on time.

[Ethan Klein]

Let's see where we get.

[Jeremy]

Why don't we just do some of the goofs and gaffes? Oh, we didn't.

[Ethan Klein]

Forgot we have a bunch of those.

[Harley]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Goofs and gaffes.

[Jeremy]

Because I think. I think once we get into it, it could be like a 45 minute to an hour long thing.

[Ethan Klein]

We'll do it on Monday. We got it. Ready to go.

[Jeremy]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Friend of the show. Lewis Sanderson is channeling all the English fans who are devastated by their loss.

[Jeremy]

Of course. He must have been.

[Ethan Klein]

He was ready to go.

[Jeremy]

Man, that's face paint. That's blood.

[Dan]

That's. Ian, bro,

[Ethan Klein]

Just to give you an idea of just how bad the English are taking it. Yeah, Been tough time for them. Elderly man sucked into airport conveyor belt. That sounds fun and light.

[Jeremy]

What the hell?

[Ethan Klein]

Let's see. Oh, my gosh. What is about to happen.

[Nate]

Oh, this happens all the time.

[Ethan Klein]

Wait, wait.

[Jeremy]

Why is he doing that?

[Ethan Klein]

Wait, wait, wait, wait. Is that. That looks like. Is that a woman?

[Nate]

Yeah, I think so.

[Ethan Klein]

So she thought it was an escalator. She thought the. Check. How did nobody see that?

[Jeremy]

Moving sidewalks.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. How did nobody catch her? So she just cruises through. Yeah. That's awesome.

[Nate]

It's actually a new system Delta's been working on.

[Ethan Klein]

Express route.

[Nate]

Yeah. You just laid down there and they put you in the baggage.

[Ethan Klein]

She just resigned to her fate. Just put her head back and let that. Enjoy the ride. Watch this. Bye.

[Nate]

I see the darkness.

[Dan]

Mid summer type beat.

[Nate]

She thought she was passing.

[Ethan Klein]

And this is why people over 75 should be liquidated.

[Nate]

Tied to a wheelchair wherever they go.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, God. That's a. That's. That's the worst timeline where they're all forced into mobility scooters.

[Nate]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Fighter jets fly super low over beach. I guess this was just impromptu, which is kind of insane. Usually they plan these. Looks like. I mean, it's cool, but I'm already laughing. Watch how it blows everything away after. Oh, and then there's a. There's a sonic boom right in their face. Can you imagine? A sonic boom right in your face. Wait, there's no way he did a sonic boom.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

Probably not a sonic, but. But a huge amount of backlash.

[Nate]

Yeah. You'd see the sonic bo.

[Gabe]

Such an.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, hold on, though. They did it because we actually have. Why they did it.

[Jeremy]

Feet above their heads. It's so insane.

[Ethan Klein]

We were ordered. They were ordered by our Secretary of War, Pete Hegseth. And he said of the flyovers, the flyovers will continue until morale improves. Oh, Lord.

[Jeremy]

So, so stupid.

[Ethan Klein]

That probably was cool. If I don't. I feel bad. Maybe the kids got scared and sand in their eyes and stuff, I guess

[Jeremy]

if they weren't expecting it.

[Nate]

Too bad.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

I mean, presumably. Presumably it's an air show because that. Those are the. What's it called? The Blue Angels is like.

[Ethan Klein]

Here's the pilot.

[Jeremy]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

For those claiming the Blue Angels incident yesterday was perfectly fine, here is their lead pilot, Captain Adam Brian. Say it was unsafe and that they will work to make sure it doesn't happen again. I think the Angels threw her down and made sure she was not coming back. Blue Angels.

[Jeremy]

It's unsafe. He's. He did it.

[Ethan Klein]

No, no, I think he. He's their captain. He didn't do it. Well, let's hear him out.

[Jeremy]

Obviously, you guys got a lot of

[Nate]

attention from yesterday, including from Pete Hegseth,

[Jeremy]

who says, keep flying, flyover.

[Ethan Klein]

So talk a little bit about that

[Jeremy]

incident and then what you do afterwards, if anything.

[Gabe]

Yeah. So, you know, every flight we do,

[Nate]

whether it goes incredibly well or we don't have the best flight, we look at it and we debrief it every day. During yesterday's circle and arrival maneuvers, one of our pilots found himself over the Beastline over a crowd in an unsafe situation.

[Ethan Klein]

He found himself there.

[Jeremy]

He found it just happens situation.

[Nate]

The safety of our flight demonstration. The safety of the crowd that goes out there and watches every day.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay. So they were there to see planes. That's sick.

[Jeremy]

The Blue Angels are. I believe it's the Navy. Right? It's part of the Navy, but it's specifically like they go around to air shows doing like stunts and stuff. It's sort of like a. I think basically it's an ad for the Navy.

[Ethan Klein]

But if you go to that, getting a flyover like that is dope.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, I've been. When I was a little kid, a friend's parents took me to an air show because that's definitely not the type of activity my parents were into. But I got, I got brought along with one and when I was nine, I thought it was cool as sick.

[Ethan Klein]

I mean I would probably think that. I mean you don't even be nine. You could be a full grown adult. That's cool as.

[Jeremy]

Fair enough.

[Nate]

Is the utmost of what we do. We work day in and day out and very hard from the start of

[Gabe]

our training to ensure safety is paramount for everything.

[Ethan Klein]

So we'll have. This guy's just well trained. This guy's like PR up the wazoo.

[Nate]

We review of what happened yesterday to

[Gabe]

ensure that one, we don't put ourselves

[Nate]

in unsafe situations again and two, that

[Gabe]

we learn from it.

[Ethan Klein]

And that's the most important thing that

[Gabe]

we do from anything that happens out there.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. This guy needs to coach on pr. This guy's a beast.

[Jeremy]

That's why he's the captain, dude.

[Nate]

Yeah. He didn't answer a single question. That's awesome.

[Ethan Klein]

This story is wild. Okay. Man gets stuck inside Porta Potty. Oh, I so genuinely. So confusing and disturbing. Look at this. Just look at the. The. This poor man frantically.

[Gabe]

Bro, come out. You got out of there. Cut all the way down. Watch your self. Get it way back. We're going to cut all the way down.

[Jeremy]

Okay.

[Gabe]

Get way back.

[Ethan Klein]

What? Hold on. You'll see it.

[Jeremy]

No, I. I get it.

[Gabe]

Watch your arm. Where's your arm at?

[Hila Klein]

What?

[Nate]

How.

[Jeremy]

This is so wrong.

[Nate]

He was apparently trying to get a monk in here.

[Ethan Klein]

We have an explanation. We have. We have all the details.

[Gabe]

Okay.

[Nate]

Okay.

[Jeremy]

Fantastic.

[Ethan Klein]

So wait, I imagine he was like standing up but he's laying down or something. Yeah. Cuz it's on the floor and this isn't the.

[Jeremy]

No, he's like fully in the tank.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. No, he's.

[Nate]

Yeah. And the tank isn't that deep? I mean, it ends right there.

[Gabe]

Oh, no. You can get out now.

[Ethan Klein]

Watch this.

[Gabe]

Get out, get out. Come on, man. Come out.

[Jeremy]

Oh, good God, dude.

[Nate]

Awesome. But that firefighter got pissed and shit all over.

[Ethan Klein]

Those guys are like, I'm not fucking coming any closer. This my boy is just enjoying his time in there, eh?

[Nate]

I know.

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

That's what I. I mean, I guess you have the explanation. I feel like this guy is.

[Ethan Klein]

He's into it.

[Nate]

Yeah. 100.

[Jeremy]

You don't wind up in there like by mistake. Come on.

[Hila Klein]

Holy poop.

[Ethan Klein]

Say that again.

[Jeremy]

Arguing about how to get

[Hila Klein]

someone in.

[Ethan Klein]

Chat said just tip it over at this point.

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Hila Klein]

For real?

[Jeremy]

Yeah, just tip that over.

[Ethan Klein]

He'll stay.

[Gabe]

I'm not listening. Lean forward like you were before. Now you just. Now you're just talking now there. Lean forward. Put your head through the hole. You got the out of there. Hurry up, bro.

[Ethan Klein]

Come on.

[Gabe]

Screws are sticking out. So lean forward like you have your head through the first. You got space.

[Hila Klein]

Now

[Gabe]

stick your head through the hole. No, lean your head.

[Ethan Klein]

That.

[Nate]

Weaponized incompetence.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

For real.

[Gabe]

I don't know. I just.

[Jeremy]

I can't get out.

[Gabe]

I don't know.

[Ethan Klein]

Just throw him a rope.

[Gabe]

There you go. Put that. Take your left arm. Take that left arm. Put it straight up. Put it straight up. Look at these screw. Put that arm up. Put your left arm straight up. Listen to me. Left arm straight up.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

There you go.

[Gabe]

Now lean forward.

[Jeremy]

Have you ever seen a clip where the firefighters are like, pissed off at the person they're trying to arrest?

[Kate]

You.

[Ethan Klein]

He really wants to cover them in. Yeah, he's like, you gotta help me.

[Jeremy]

You gotta help me.

[Ethan Klein]

You gotta help me.

[Jeremy]

I can't do it.

[Ethan Klein]

I can't do it. This is part of his fetish maybe, eh?

[Jeremy]

Yeah.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

For real.

[Nate]

I think he's been here for more than eight hours.

[Jeremy]

So horrible.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay, so part one. Right. But now we can see him. The conclusion of him getting hosed off.

[Jeremy]

Okay.

[Hila Klein]

Holy poop.

[Ethan Klein]

You could say that again and again. Hey, here we go.

[Gabe]

Holy.

[Ethan Klein]

They're just blasting. Nobody's getting close to him.

[Jeremy]

They should just blast him with a fire hose.

[Ethan Klein]

What is he showering on?

[Nate]

Just the fire truck.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, I think.

[Ethan Klein]

Look how far away they are.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, I'd be further than that, to be honest.

[Ethan Klein]

All right, we're have some further explanation statement from the company. Uhhuh. Let's take a look here.

[Jeremy]

From the company. Oh, like the Porta Potted company?

[Nate]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay, Update. Let's see.

[Nate]

Oh yeah, this is the video I

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

saw it's very July 14, 2026. My name is Chip Counterman. I'm a partner with Patriot Portable Restrooms here in Kansas City. But one of our guys went to pick up an event from the World Cup. I knocked on all the doors, made sure nobody was in the restaurant.

[Ethan Klein]

Bro, we know what the World cup is. The hell was that? I get my claimed rooms.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

He did find one of them locked, knocked on the door and.

[Ethan Klein]

So he locked it. He locked it and then climbed in. Wait, hold on. That's very interesting.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Cut. I knocked on all the doors, made sure nobody was in the restrooms. He did find one of the locked, knocked on the door and let the gentleman know he had 10 minutes to get out. Picked up everything else, went back to that toilet and knocked again. The man inside said he was not going to get out. Luckily, a police officer on a motorcycle went by. Our driver waved him down. Cop walked up to the door and asked the man to exit the toilet. The man replied that he could not reach, reached the door and couldn't get out of the toilet. They looked inside and didn't see anybody closed. No one was in the restroom. It kind of startled them.

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

Mysterious.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Out of the toilet. And fire department came after that and tried to instruct a man to exit the toilet.

[Law Enforcement Narrator]

And

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

they asked him why he went in and he told them he was retrieving a Mountain Dew bottle that he

[Ethan Klein]

dropped in from the night before.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

So that put him in inside of the tank for about eight hours.

[Ethan Klein]

If all of that was in a mountain of doo doo, you might say,

[Jeremy]

oh my God, this changes.

[Hila Klein]

Where was he in there?

[Ethan Klein]

Well, he must have been like in fetal. He must have been balled up because it's not that space.

[Jeremy]

No, definitely not. So it. It completely threw me that it was lost because my presumption that he was a pervert and wanted to like be in there while people used it, but he.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, I didn't even think about that.

[Jeremy]

That was what I was assuming. But hearing that he locked the door and then climbed into it. I don't know what the rationale is though.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

To just roll around in it.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[Hila Klein]

Oh, my God.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

After it was cut.

[Dan]

Do the dude.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

I was able to exit the toilet. Fire department did hook up water to their truck and gave them a free shower. Long story short, horrible situation. Thank you to the Kansas City, Missouri fire department and police department for all the help. Watch out. Falling into toilets.

[Ethan Klein]

That's not what happened.

[Hila Klein]

Wait, so he. Was he actually stuck? No, no.

[Ethan Klein]

How. How could he be? I Don't know.

[Hila Klein]

I don't know how.

[Ethan Klein]

Seemed like he was being dumb. Like they even cut it open for him.

[Nate]

So here's my question. Did he commit a crime? I'm possibly not.

[Ethan Klein]

I'm just saying, like, no, I don't think so.

[Nate]

There's not really a crime that's been committed. I don't think maybe trespassing, because he's not. He would leave. But that's so funny that.

[Ethan Klein]

That's not. I don't think he was charged.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, he'd probably let him go after that.

[Nate]

So he probably gonna do that right

[Ethan Klein]

back, you know, right back to the pit. If they find him again, they probably.

[Hila Klein]

I can't imagine anything that smells worse than that.

[Ethan Klein]

The Porta Potty is one of the most worst places on earth to be.

[Jeremy]

For real?

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Dan]

I got a scenario for you. God forbid, and I mean God forbid, one of your watches, and I've often thought about this myself. One of your watches. The class break, something catastrophic and it falls right into the shithole.

[Ethan Klein]

I get a tool.

[Dan]

You get a tool. You don't crawl in there.

[Ethan Klein]

Fuck no. I would figure it out, but I.

[Jeremy]

There's definitely ways to get it out without crawling in there. Zach.

[David]

Okay.

[Gabe]

I don't know.

[Dan]

This guy wanted to get his Mountain Dew out.

[Jeremy]

Well, Mountain Dew is less. Not. Yeah, well, what if you can reach

[Nate]

it with your hand? I'm curious. Would you reach down?

[Ethan Klein]

If it's right there at the top, like it has shit on it, but it's not like you have to dig around.

[Nate]

It's not entrenched and there's no toilet paper.

[Ethan Klein]

If I could do it. If I could do like that. Yeah, I'd take it up.

[Nate]

Even though you would touch shit?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, I would do like that.

[Dan]

Would. What if it was a scenario where you had to grab, like you had to claw.

[Ethan Klein]

If I saw it, I. If I saw it, was capable of just snatching it. I'd do that.

[Nate]

You okay here? There's a small shimmer in a mountain of. You see it? But you gotta push this.

[Ethan Klein]

I'd probably grab it.

[Nate]

Okay, I've thought the same scenario. If you drop your phone in the toilet, do you just.

[Ethan Klein]

The phone. I might. I might let. I might let. Yeah, that one. I might let go.

[Nate]

I've thought about it, you know, like if. If you're quick and of like you can just do that.

[Jeremy]

One sec, five second rule.

[Ethan Klein]

I mean, you wash your hands, you'll be fine. Gross for a second.

[Nate]

I probably have to.

[Ethan Klein]

I mean, I'd probably do it to my phone. I probably do it for my phone too.

[Nate]

Public. Public urinal or a public bathroom?

[Dan]

Yeah, toilet, bro.

[Ethan Klein]

My own bathroom. It's not even a question. But the thing is, like, you can. What? You wash the. Out of your hands and your phone. You'll be fine. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I agree. Taking a whole swim. I just don't see a need for that.

[Dan]

It fucking goes to, like, down under.

[Ethan Klein]

I'm not climbing in. I'm not climbing in under any circumstance. Nothing's gonna bring me inside.

[Nate]

Yeah, it's all the way in the left corner. You see it? But you'd have to push your head. No needs to go below this.

[Ethan Klein]

That's when I get a tool.

[Nate]

Okay, yeah, fair enough. I mean, I'm sure they have people.

[Ethan Klein]

Dude, I would call them. There's probably a number you can call.

[Nate]

Yeah, could you stand outside?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, I would stand outside.

[Harley]

It's like.

[Nate]

It's not for you.

[Ethan Klein]

I'll just say drop something valuable in there and I'm just waiting for them to.

[Nate]

What if someone insists they have to? Really?

[Ethan Klein]

Honestly, what's the difference at that point,

[Gabe]

bro, you got 10 minutes to get what?

[Ethan Klein]

I mean, what's the difference? I don't really care, honestly. The cop shows up,

[Nate]

sir, you can't stop him from going in the bathroom. He needs to go.

[Ethan Klein]

It's fine. It's fine.

[Nate]

Oh, God.

[Jeremy]

Good times.

[Hila Klein]

Good times.

[Ethan Klein]

Chuck Schumer, Fart Gate. This is interesting.

[Jeremy]

Oh, this is just. Have you heard this yet?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

This is unbelievable.

[Ethan Klein]

Another old. That needs to go away, bro.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Bro.

[Dan]

Farts and oscillator, bro.

[Ethan Klein]

These people are so old, they're their pants. On camera regularly. They're having strokes. They're their pants.

[Jeremy]

Well, we don't know that for sure. It could have just been like a. A table. Sound or chair. Now on Iran and the ndaa.

[Ethan Klein]

Whoa.

[Law Enforcement Narrator]

The American.

[Ethan Klein]

That's it. The question is how he reacts.

[Jeremy]

People need to know, of course, how and why this chaos is spreading.

[Ethan Klein]

Sorry, I had a Taco Bell.

[Dan]

Chucky made a choo choo.

[Jeremy]

Need a complete investigation.

[Ethan Klein]

That's independent.

[Jeremy]

Now on Iran and the ndaa. When all he, like, rises up, it's like he's launching into orbit.

[Ethan Klein]

That was incredibly loud. Like it reverberated, eh? Like good acoustics in that room.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Oh, no.

[Jeremy]

He's fully mic'd up. Administration can say about his disastrous war with Iran is that Vietnam was worse. Go back. We gotta analyze that again.

[Dan]

I also have it polled as a sound yesterday.

[Ethan Klein]

Why do they play so much more like we heard.

[Jeremy]

We heard maybe there's another one now Iran.

[Ethan Klein]

I'm just saying in the ndaa when

[Jeremy]

all look, he's get he getting his elevation, dude.

[Ethan Klein]

He tastes it when all the trouble he's smiling here. Could that have been something else?

[Nate]

It could be someone else on someone

[Ethan Klein]

else's mic rubbing on something or them

[Jeremy]

far dance that motion along with it sure seems damn if administration can say about now now on Iran and the NDAA when all I don't know, man.

[Ethan Klein]

No, I'm trying to.

[Dan]

You know it's a very prominent waveform.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, well, it would be.

[Dan]

It could be a leather chair. Could be.

[Ethan Klein]

Are you analyzing from the waveform? Do you think you could predict the object?

[Dan]

We. We did this before and I didn't get a single one right. But just to give him the I want it to be a fart. Like I want it to be a fart.

[Jeremy]

I'm usually skeptical. I think this one's a fart.

[Hila Klein]

I think it's a fart.

[Ethan Klein]

I mean all the signs are pointing

[Jeremy]

to fart administration can say about his disastrous war with Iran is that Vietnam was worse.

[Ethan Klein]

Why is it so long a point

[Law Enforcement Narrator]

Trump made

[Ethan Klein]

There better be this is

[Jeremy]

what Donald Trump said. The only thing he can say is Vietnam was worse.

[Gabe]

Oh my God.

[Ethan Klein]

OMG

[Jeremy]

now now complete investigation. That's independent now on Iran and the ndaa.

[Ethan Klein]

I think they wanted to include him like clearing his throat.

[Jeremy]

People are saying he laughs like he's like proud of himself.

[Nate]

No, he does have a little smug face right after and maybe Ron in

[Jeremy]

the end maybe it's because he's smelling

[Harley]

all

[Hila Klein]

he does have a little.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, he chuckles a little bit.

[Nate]

That confirms it.

[Ethan Klein]

When all the Trump administrators yeah, he does

[Jeremy]

such a good catch now on Iran and the ndaa when all the Trump administrator He knows he knows what he did failure and yeah, the cough in a second I think is the smell hitting him? Yes. He's like oh,

[Gabe]

the only.

[Jeremy]

The only thing in the back this bro.

[Gabe]

Dude,

[Nate]

why is there no like noise game?

[Ethan Klein]

Dude? Are you impressed with my clicking?

[Jeremy]

It's pretty spot on. When all the Trump administration can say

[Ethan Klein]

oh my God.

[Jeremy]

When all the Trump I put up a poll.

[Ethan Klein]

This is our people, folks.

[Hila Klein]

Oh my God.

[Jeremy]

The only thing when all.

[Law Enforcement Narrator]

When all.

[Ethan Klein]

Right, throw it up.

[Jeremy]

When all the Trump administration the only

[Law Enforcement Narrator]

thing he can

[Nate]

oh, wow.

[Jeremy]

Give a 8080 of the poll saying it's a fart.

[Hila Klein]

Wow.

[Nate]

That confirms it.

[Ethan Klein]

I don't know who's voting not to be honest.

[Jeremy]

Well, actually not not sure. Is the second highest with 14 the only. Okay, all right, that's enough of the. The only thing when.

[Hila Klein]

Oh, it's God.

[Dan]

When It's a musical fart, dude. It changes pitches.

[Ethan Klein]

Jump in there, Zach. Change the pitch. Slow it down or speed it up.

[Harley]

This seems like a real time exe video.

[Ethan Klein]

Then lip smacking.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah,

[Jeremy]

My God.

[Gabe]

Enough.

[Dan]

No, that is a saw based synthesizer, bro.

[Jeremy]

That's a saw wave right there.

[Nate]

All right, I'm plugging my head.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, me too.

[Dan]

I got.

[Jeremy]

I can't hang.

[Ethan Klein]

Dude.

[Hila Klein]

My headphones off.

[Dan]

It's a car engine.

[Gabe]

We're turning the oil. We'll be right back when all the trunk.

[Jeremy]

Wrap it up, dude.

[Gabe]

Cut him off.

[Ethan Klein]

All right. Thank you, Chucky.

[Jeremy]

Thanks, Chuck.

[Ethan Klein]

How old is this man?

[Jeremy]

He's 98.

[Ethan Klein]

No, it's.

[Gabe]

No, I don't.

[Jeremy]

I don't know. It's something like that though.

[Ethan Klein]

He's early 80s. He's got to be right?

[Nate]

83 is my guess.

[Ethan Klein]

8. Yeah, that sounds 75. Old ass loser.

[Nate]

Damn, he looks bad for his age.

[Ethan Klein]

Get out. Go retire, dumbass.

[Nate]

Who is he? Is he bad or good?

[Ethan Klein]

And he's a Democrat that's been in service forever.

[Jeremy]

So we're at 3 hours 20 minutes. We just have a few minutes left and reminder that we start at noon today, so.

[Hila Klein]

And we have more donations probably. Right.

[Ethan Klein]

Let's watch gay or gamer and then we'll do donuts. So this is the new meta. What's. Would you rather be gay or a gamer? Oh, wait.

[Nate]

Funniest ever.

[Ethan Klein]

And you'll be surprised that. Hey, everybody start all of a sudden. Is not homophobic at all.

[Jeremy]

Oh, interesting. They'd rather be gay than a gamer.

[Ethan Klein]

Every anything. Would you rather be gay or a gamer? Would you rather be gay or a gamer? Oh, he's cut. He's doing a gag. Would you rather be gay or a gamer?

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Okay.

[Harley]

Would you rather.

[Ethan Klein]

Rather be gay or a gamer?

[David]

Gay.

[Ethan Klein]

Would you rather be gay or a gamer? A g. Would you rather be gay or a gamer? I'm already a gamer. Would you rather be gay or a gamer?

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Oh.

[Ethan Klein]

Would you rather be gay or a gamer?

[Nate]

Progressive.

[Ethan Klein]

Would you rather be gay or a gamer?

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Gay.

[Hila Klein]

Okay.

[Ethan Klein]

Is that what you said? No.

[Nate]

Okay, yeah.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Gay.

[Jeremy]

All right.

[Gabe]

Yeah, fair enough.

[Ethan Klein]

Business.

[Jeremy]

Just going to prove that the most oppressed minority in this country is now gamers.

[Ethan Klein]

I mean. Yeah, we've all been trying to say that for a long time.

[Nate]

Yep.

[Ethan Klein]

All right, let's. Let's thank our wonderful fans out there.

[Jeremy]

Okay, let's see where I Left.

[Ethan Klein]

Maybe I'll take one more call too.

[Hila Klein]

Oh, yeah, do we need to check in with Lexi? Anything?

[Caller (Various)]

Who?

[Hila Klein]

Lexi? Hello?

[Gabe]

Who?

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Hello?

[Jeremy]

God. Uncle alert. Hit him with the uncle. Or people.

[Hila Klein]

Symphonia number nine or whatever it was.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay. Why didn't you say that? I thought I would remember.

[Jeremy]

Fair enough. All right, listen, Sarah Marie, earlier in the show said that Dan is right. Thank you.

[Ethan Klein]

About what?

[Jeremy]

The clothing is sponsored and sponsors want eyeballs to watch them. The smaller the outfit, the more persons of culture it appeals to, so. Right. I didn't put it exactly that way, but that's a good point. The sponsors that create the uniforms for these teams, they have an incentive to try and make their sponsorship as worth it as possible.

[Hila Klein]

I doubt that.

[Ethan Klein]

I know. I feel. Yeah, I feel like.

[Hila Klein]

I feel like there is probably a guideline and the people working at the company, if it's Nike, they'll be like, okay, what is your usual uniform? And then they design into that.

[Harley]

Fair enough.

[Hila Klein]

I don't think the designers are like,

[Ethan Klein]

yeah, I don't think they would gain that much from

[Jeremy]

trying to make them more revealing.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. All right. Fair enough. Be kind of scandalous too.

[Nate]

But it. It limits. What if the women can't really choose what they. They design, so they're stuck with whatever?

[Hila Klein]

Yeah, that.

[Nate]

That's. That's. I think, the main issue.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Hello. This your opinion. Please tell us what it is. Go ahead.

[Caller (Various)]

Hi, thank you for calling Denny's.

[Gabe]

How can I help you?

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, hey, are you. Are you expecting a party of five later tonight?

[Gabe]

Yeah, Can I get a name for the party?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, Klein. And the first name? Ethan.

[Caller (Various)]

A.

[Gabe]

Not you again.

[Ethan Klein]

Hey, what do you mean? Sarah, you call in again. Oh, it's a different Ethan Klein. It's a different one.

[Hila Klein]

Got him.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay, so too. I might. Can I take a reservation?

[Caller (Various)]

We'll try it one more time.

[Nate]

All right.

[Gabe]

What time are you coming in?

[Ethan Klein]

Coming in at 7.

[Caller (Various)]

Okay, 7pm that's not good.

[Ethan Klein]

The other Ethan Klein usually shows up at night too. Well, my. And my wife Hilda is gonna be ex. She needs special. She needs vegetarian. So no animal products.

[David]

Products.

[Ethan Klein]

That's Hilda.

[Nate]

We don't have any more veggies anymore

[Ethan Klein]

with the outbreak right now. All right.

[Jeremy]

Oh, I'm this diarrhea.

[Ethan Klein]

This. I'm going to IHOP.

[Jeremy]

No, you're not. Don't lie. You're not going to IHOP.

[Nate]

What a LARPer.

[Jeremy]

Yo, it's Hilda.

[Nate]

Oh, yeah, look at that.

[Ethan Klein]

Now flip it.

[Jeremy]

Very nice.

[Ethan Klein]

Unclert. Get that out of here.

[Jeremy]

Wow, that was A beautiful call.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, you guys get free unclerts? I. I keep. I need to constantly remind people of that gift business.

[Jeremy]

Eh, it's free.

[Ethan Klein]

Apparently they you get like a 3,000 to give away or something. Oh, how fun. Isn't that right?

[Jeremy]

I'm not totally sure, to be honest.

[Harley]

I believe you get some free bits at first.

[Hila Klein]

Okay.

[Harley]

It doesn't have to be the uncle or whatever you want to spend it on.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, that tends to be.

[Ethan Klein]

Be the one.

[Jeremy]

Let's see. Let me keep it rolling. Keep it rolling, keep it rolling. Carly McCre said. Ethan, I'm on my 92nd phone call. Please answer the phone before I cancel my 44 month membership with angst and hate. No. Peace and love. I don't think we got a hold of Carly, so she might be gone.

[Ethan Klein]

I'll try one more. This is my last one for the day.

[Jeremy]

Okay.

[Hila Klein]

Hi.

[Ethan Klein]

Busy.

[Hila Klein]

Think.

[Ethan Klein]

Fine. How can I help you?

[Gabe]

Oh my God.

[Caller (Various)]

Hey, girl.

[Ethan Klein]

Wait, who's this?

[Caller (Various)]

This is Riley.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, I thought it actually was Olivia. It sounded like her for a minute. That's crazy. Hi. Hi, Riley. How can I help you?

[Caller (Various)]

I was just calling to say what's up.

[Ethan Klein]

All right, well, nice to hear from you. Appreciate that.

[Jeremy]

Well, Carly, I'm sorry that you didn't get through and I. Hopefully you're not gone forever. After 90 second attempt. Alexandra said at 12 I ran track. We had required uniforms that were very small and creepy. Old men would come to the track meets that weren't related to the competitors.

[Ethan Klein]

That doesn't surprise me.

[Jeremy]

That doesn't seem good. You're a squid. You're a kid. Donated $10 and said my birthday is next Friday on the 24th.

[Harley]

4th.

[Jeremy]

Can I be on the calendar? There is no more calendar. Really? Right. Calendar's done.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, she's. She's locked into something else.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, she's not even. She's not even listening to the show right now. She doesn't even know we're talking about her. Switch over to tomorrow. Switch over. Nate. There you go. Yeah, she has no idea.

[Ethan Klein]

She's in the zone. Locked in on something.

[Jeremy]

There's no idea.

[Gabe]

What a.

[Jeremy]

An idiot.

[Kate]

Dude, according to Dan, it was something Indian.

[Ethan Klein]

What?

[Jeremy]

Ava said Yesterday was my 21st birthday. I'm so sad I missed the show. Could I get a late 21? Fu.

[Ethan Klein]

Zach, you.

[Jeremy]

He was already on it. Peace and love to you guys. Thank you, Ava. And happy birthday.

[Ethan Klein]

Happy birthday.

[Jeremy]

Hope it was. Hope it was fun. Ethan, put the phone on the fucking hook. This is call number 200. That was from Carly McCree.

[Hila Klein]

Again.

[Nate]

Geez.

[Jeremy]

She got up to 200 and she still didn't get through.

[Ethan Klein]

Yikes, dude, keep calling.

[Jeremy]

My old boss went to Shambhala and had a bad trip. She had a year long manic episode, broke up with her husband of 15 years and plunged her company into the ground. Have fun, Ab.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, don't take drugs. I mean, just don't take drugs.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, that's not champagne. All its fault. That's like, that's. That's acid or fall or something. I don't know.

[Hila Klein]

Wow.

[Jeremy]

Y' all need to watch the documentary the Age of Disclosure about uap. They interview Rubio and he's says there's a cover up. It's a pretty convincing doc. I don't understand why these people in the Trump administration are talking about like, as if they're not like in charge.

[Ethan Klein]

We're covering it up.

[Nate]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

What are we talking about here? There's some sort of COVID up.

[Ethan Klein]

I mean, it very much just seems like a.

[Jeremy]

Seems like a distraction.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. I usually don't buy into this stuff. I think it's like always like people are a little paranoid about this stuff, but it seems pretty obvious that. That they're just trying to throw chum to the fish.

[Jeremy]

They're jingling keys.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, exactly.

[Jeremy]

Mrs. Braun said I made latkes and they were genuinely asked. Anyone got tips?

[Ethan Klein]

Just look up a different recipe.

[Jeremy]

What. How do the latkes that my family make are really good? That came from. That came from our bubby.

[Ethan Klein]

And shred the potato.

[Jeremy]

You dry. You dry them. That, that's a big part. Maybe, maybe that step was missed. You really got to like, you got

[Ethan Klein]

to dry them, even leave them out for a bit after you pat them down.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

I went to flour, egg, salt. I mean, what do you do?

[Dan]

I went to a brain breakfast place by me. They have latke tater tots.

[Jeremy]

Oh, that's interesting. That is interesting.

[Ethan Klein]

It's like a deep fried latke.

[Dan]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, I guess all latkes are kind of.

[Nate]

Yeah.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

All fried.

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Dan]

In reality, I think they were just mini latkes, but they like.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, I guess that's another way to do it. That's another way to do it.

[Ethan Klein]

My favorite. From Jacksonville.

[Jeremy]

Oh, no. Nick Boris. Oh, I didn't see this.

[Ethan Klein]

I'm sorry.

[Jeremy]

My dude, he had said I popped into the VIP backstage. I think we missed our chance today.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

But.

[Jeremy]

But now, now we know Nick Boris, He. He had offered the photographer. Remember he. He was saying he had some. What was it? It was about the.

[Hila Klein]

Something related to UFOs.

[Jeremy]

Right. The UFO. Right. He was a Navy photographer. Well, maybe on Monday we could.

[David]

Can.

[Jeremy]

We can circle back with you. And now I know that you're in the discord. So if we ever. I wasn't sure how to reach you before, but now. Now I know. Hey, guys. Humble carpenter from Colorado here. Currently sporting the unicorn tea I just received today.

[Hila Klein]

Oh, yeah.

[Jeremy]

I have a very relevant take on track and field dress code argument. Collapse.

[Hila Klein]

Collapse.

[Jeremy]

I don't know what collapse means. They just. There was like, a period, and then just. Just the word collapse. New sentence.

[Ethan Klein]

Did you click it?

[Gabe]

No.

[Jeremy]

I mean, it's not a language like collapse, expand.

[Hila Klein]

It sounds like. Yeah, it sounds like you're supposed to click on it.

[Ethan Klein]

I think you got trolled, dude. Frozen solid.

[Hila Klein]

Oh, it's a troll.

[Ethan Klein]

You got pranked, bro.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Damn.

[Jeremy]

I got pranked so hard. Tomorrow, I have miniatures to send you. They are vintage and antique wooden and metal furniture pieces. How do I get them to you?

[Ethan Klein]

We shouldn't. We should. Oh, she heard that one.

[Kate]

Indian.

[Ethan Klein]

Indian.

[Jeremy]

Do you hear any of that?

[Hila Klein]

No.

[Jeremy]

Tamara, I have miniatures to send you. They are vintage and antique wooden and metal furniture pieces. How can I get them to you?

[Kate]

That's amazing. I would love that very much.

[Ethan Klein]

Didn't answer.

[Jeremy]

Should she reach out to you on email or something?

[Kate]

You should just message me on Instagram or on Instagram.

[Jeremy]

It's from Emily Nemo.

[Ethan Klein]

Thank you, Emily Nemo.

[Jeremy]

I think my Bluetooth driver On my Windows 11 is missing. Is anyone else having this problem? What do we do about it? Just asking for some tech support.

[Nate]

Google it.

[Ethan Klein]

Email tomorrow.

[Kate]

Google it.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, email tomorrow. H3H3Productions.com for all of your tech support.

[Ethan Klein]

Damn. Just did that. You probably don't use that email for anything more than that thing. It doesn't.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah, more miniatures.

[Ethan Klein]

Keep it rolling.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, more miniatures. Exactly. Thank you. This is from a gentleman named Hugh. Last name?

[Nate]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

No. Jeff.

[Gabe]

Jeff.

[Hila Klein]

Ben.

[Jeremy]

Cock there.

[Dan]

Hugh Jesso.

[Jeremy]

Okay. They said. Dan, this is the last time I'm donating for this dumb sound bite you promised me. Hey, what did I promise? I want to hear Trump's China with girlfriend. First of all, why are you yelling at me? I am not the soundbite guy.

[Ethan Klein]

That's true. Zach.

[Dan]

This is dance department.

[Ethan Klein]

Wuffy, can you throw that together?

[Dan]

Chat.

[Jeremy]

He wants Trump saying China with the guy doing the Chinese girlfriend.

[Dan]

I'll have it by Monday.

[Jeremy]

I'll have it by Monday. Just for you. You also. Glad to have y' all back. Y' all look extra beautiful with the New lights. Except Nate.

[Hila Klein]

Oh.

[Jeremy]

Oh, I'm just reading the chat, actually.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, my light is pretty terrible.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, we'll work on that.

[Ethan Klein]

That was actually true.

[Jeremy]

We'll get to that one.

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

Today is my nine year anniversary with my husband. Is it possible for us to get nine years? You. I don't think we have years.

[Ethan Klein]

But you could just do nine.

[Jeremy]

We could just say nine years.

[Ethan Klein]

You up to Z.

[Jeremy]

It's not quite as good as Aiden Ross doing it, is it?

[Harley]

What the.

[Dan]

Is it.

[Ethan Klein]

Nine you nine nine you nine nine nine nine nine nine nine nine. What did. What did Hitler say when the Jew asked to be free?

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

9

[Jeremy]

It's my birthday today. Can I get everyone to flip off the camera and get an insane Harley sound bite? I mean, sure.

[Ethan Klein]

That's vulgar. I'm not doing it.

[Jeremy]

Can't flip off the camera.

[Ethan Klein]

Here, read between the lines.

[Jeremy]

Oh, nice one. Sick one.

[Ethan Klein]

Awesome.

[Dan]

What did they want?

[Ethan Klein]

Was the other part?

[Jeremy]

Dan, what did they say? They wanted a insane Harley sound bite. Okay, but you're a porn suit. Like, you're not like a real. You're not there, sweaty dick out jerking

[Ethan Klein]

off before mom and dad get home.

[Jeremy]

You're like a fabricated vision of what jerking off could be about.

[Ethan Klein]

What?

[Jeremy]

But us, the real deal, we abbreviated to cuck. I see. And that same person who asked us to flip off the camera said, I forgot to mention I'm turning 22.

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

Happy birthday to you. You dishrack said that that's what the demons hear right before doom guy enters the room. What the. The Chuck Schumer fart. I'm assuming.

[Ethan Klein]

Assuming Earlier, I feel like.

[Gabe]

And then.

[Jeremy]

No, it was. It just. It came in just a few minutes ago. So I'm assuming the Chuck Schumer thing. I'm trying to explain to my son why I'm dying laughing. Definitely a fart. Papa Nurgle hath blessed Chuck this day. They're confirming. And that's from Spooky Kabuki.

[Ethan Klein]

There it is. Stay Spooky Kabuki.

[Jeremy]

There you go. And finally, we have one from Handy Dandy. Handy. What if there's no sink? What in the. Oh, this must have been when love was posing the hypothetical about reaching into the toilet.

[Gabe]

Probably.

[Jeremy]

It seemed like Ethan was down to reach into the poopy. No matter what, to get that watch.

[Ethan Klein]

I wouldn't crawl in. I would grab in. I wouldn't crawl in.

[Jeremy]

I guess they were saying, but what if you didn't have a sink there? You had no way to wash your hand after.

[Ethan Klein]

There's probably not A sink there. I'd have to figure that out.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, that's a problem. For later.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

Okay, listen, thank you to everybody who donated. Thank you to everybody who called. It was lovely to speak to you all. And stay tuned, because After Dark is coming up.

[Ethan Klein]

Wait, I have a. I have a poll real fast.

[Alexi (Symphonia 16)]

Oh, okay.

[Ethan Klein]

Should we. Can you guys tell me, is this title good or is it bad? No more Tits and Ass. I thought it was funny, but let's do a poll. Say, keep or change.

[Hila Klein]

Do you have a suggestion?

[Ethan Klein]

And then as you do that, Dan, I'll set up a. Because up next, guys, it's Friday, baby. A suggestion? No, no, I'm. Well, I'm sure we could think of something. I don't. I don't have one specifically. I'm going to change your mind, but coming up next is After Dark. As you guys know, you love them. It's Kate and Harley and David here to soothe you to as the week not to sleep. You want to stay awake for that. But the weekend's coming, so let's just cruise right in with kids. Hey, Charlie and hey, David. Coming at you, Rosenthal.

[Gabe]

Me, too.

[Ethan Klein]

Let's see what the poll says. Oh, keep it is. Well, it's 50. 50, huh? But keep it is kind of edging out.

[Jeremy]

Not a strong endorsement.

[Harley]

Really.

[Jeremy]

It's 50.

[Kate]

50.

[Nate]

Well, the people. It's. It's biased because the people who would click that video is here and vice versa.

[Jeremy]

Good point. They're here already.

[Ethan Klein]

It's a good point, but

[Nate]

it's just the freaks in here right now.

[Ethan Klein]

But if 50 say, oh, here, somebody

[Hila Klein]

said, made me click. Lemayo.

[Gabe]

There you go.

[Ethan Klein]

Tits and hats. No more tits and ass.

[Nate]

I'm judging everyone that's in here right now.

[Ethan Klein]

Y' all freaks. We caught you. Anyway, enjoy, guys, and have a great weekend. We'll be back on Monday. And remember, next week is short, unfortunately. I apologize. Although the only thing you're really missing out on is the Friday show. And so it should be relatively a normal week next week.

[Hila Klein]

But, yeah, not too bad. There'll still be content.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. Thanks, everyone. Enjoy After Dark. See you on Monday.

[David]

Sa.