Rating Fans Dating Profiles - H3 After Dark #87

Summary

H3 Podcast: Rating Fans Dating Profiles – H3 After Dark #87

Date: August 8, 2026
Host: Ethan Klein
Guests/Panel: Galia, Kate, Harley, David
Theme: The After Dark crew offers humorous, candid advice and roasts on fans’ real-life dating profiles across various apps, discussing modern online dating pitfalls, aesthetics, and how to make your dating app profile stand out. The episode blends advice, pop culture tangents, lesbian energy, and plenty of irreverent, friendly roasting.

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Episode Overview

In this fan-driven H3 After Dark, the hosts and regulars take direct submissions from listeners, reviewing and critiquing their dating app profiles (Tinder, Hinge, Bumble, etc.). While rating and offering suggestions—often with comedic jabs—the crew discusses dating trends, the quirks of online profiles, dealing with low self-esteem, what makes a profile a swipe-right, and how weird or revealing information can help or hurt chances.

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Key Discussion Points & Segments

1. Opening Banter & Team Energy (00:00–06:00)

• The cast busts into Friday energy, bouncing jokes about Gabe, DeLoreans, RV adventures, and the differences between AI art and real-life models.
• Notable tangent about festival toilets, “piss buckets,” and the value of wooden forks over questionable utensils.

Quote:
"I'm gonna wear my small penis." – Harley (09:01)

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2. Shambhala, Festival Stories & The Vibes (04:00–12:30)

• Crew reminisces about recent trips to Shambhala festival—nudity, music, and male exhibitionists.
• Jokes fly about festival attire (see-through shirts, string bikinis, etc.).
• “It's always the guys with the smallest penises that like to walk around naked.” – Harley (08:19)
• Galia compares the phenomenon to “Trailer Trash Tammy’s” wild pontoon parties.

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3. Current Pop Culture: John Goodman, Tom Holland, Robert Pattinson (13:21–38:36)

• Hot takes fly on actors: John Goodman’s “TV dad” status and dramatic weight loss, Tom Holland’s suitability as Spider-Man, and debate over Robert Pattinson’s acting chops and “lab-grown” leading men energy.
• Comedy about Tom Holland’s “frog in the mouth” look:
  “Someone said once, they said he looks like he's always hiding a frog in his mouth. It is very distracting.” – Harley (16:36)
• Long riff on being "forced to love" certain celebrities by online fandoms or "the patriarchy."
• Extended side debate on directors' “aesthetic prisons”—shout-outs and critique of Wes Anderson, Christopher Nolan, Eggers, and Tarantino.

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4. Roasting Movie Opinions, ‘Boy Movies’ vs. ‘Girl Movies’ (36:47–58:11)

• Galia repeatedly gets roasted for not seeing “boy movies” like Fight Club and Scarface in favor of “girl movies” with emotional or feminist themes.
• Group gently ribs Kate over her sparse exposure to male-centric films or superheroes.
• Harley: “I was about to talk Spider man with Galia and I saw 20 minutes of it on Twitter and then I–the rest of the movie I heard about from a friend.” (24:22)

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5. Transition to The Dating Profile Segment (60:09+)

General Advice – What Makes a Good Profile:

• “Don’t say ‘podcasts’ or ‘anime’ as main interests unless you want to filter your pool a lot.”
• “Include teeth in at least one photo—even if your teeth are bad, women are more accepting than men.”
• “Board games” is a great way to suggest teamwork and social life.
• Photos should have good lighting, not look like a doctor’s/mug shot, and you should look like you’re having fun.
• “Take new photos. Ask friends if you have to. Get over the cringe curve!”

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Dating Profile Lightning Round – Notable Profiles & Feedback

Lorenzo (61:45+)

• Complaints about lack of matches and effort; profile full of generic interests (podcasts, anime, YouTube).
• Advice:
  • Cut “podcast” and “anime,” lead with “board games” plus something active/outdoorsy.
  • Bad lighting—needs better, friendlier photos with a smile and teeth showing.
  • “Production specialist” is a vague job title–elaborate if possible.
  • “Find your shortest friends. Take pictures with them. Have AI straighten your tie and clean your room.” – Harley (74:41)

Kelly (78:42+)

• Profile packed with “references” from friends and family—a witty, creative approach.
• Feedback:
  • Good energy, strong sense of humor, lots of life in photos.
  • Maybe show more solo, closer face shots.
  • “You’re channeling monogamy, long-term relationship energy. That will attract the right people!” – David (87:34)

Arielle (90:16+)

• Highlights: “Gold star lesbian,” weed smoking every day, and a dose of sexual openness.
• Advice:
  • “Gold star lesbian” can be off-putting or exclusionary; might alienate bisexuals, assault survivors.
  • Being upfront about “I want my future wife” works well for women seeking women.
  • Some humor (e.g., “dating me is like a degenerate 15-year-old boy”) is divisive—ditch minors from your metaphors.
  • “If it’s a huge piece of you (weed, kink, etc.), say it. Otherwise, don’t lead with it.”
• “She’s built for Shambhala.” – Galia (96:15)

Summer (102:19+)

• Bisexual, therapist, seeking “authenticity.”
• Feedback:
  • Leading with happy, smiling photos recommended.
  • Traits like “authenticity” and “confidence” in both interests and “I’m looking for” columns can come off as insecurity/red flags.
  • “Cut the platitudes, focus on showing your lighter/cheery side in some responses.” – David (117:03)

Jubu – “Rare Mask Lesbian” (126:19+)

• Tattoos, grills, finger-injury story, lots of bottom energy and store manager at an adult store.
• “You’re pushy and that's good—but maybe add a lighter conversation starter.”
• Excellent voice note segment: “When I was younger, I went on the zipper ride…” (163:31)—panel suspects story is a sly dirty joke set-up.
• “Lesbians are very clear with each other, I like that about us.” – Galia (169:23)

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Dating Profile: General Dos and Don’ts (All Profiles)

• Do: Lead with smiling, teeth-showing, well-lit photos. Show solo pics as well as some active/in-context shots.
• Don’t: Over-focus on consuming media as your only interests; avoid “canned” answers and inside jokes that require deep knowledge to 'get'.
• Do: Be upfront with dealbreakers (e.g., want monogamy? Say it).
• Don’t: Announce you want “short-term relationships,” unless that’s ALL you want.
• Do: Share your height if you feel comfortable, as it’s a common filter.
• Don’t: Put up group photos without identifying yourself, or wild/party pics as the lead.
• Do: If you reference your job, make it clear.
• Don’t: Use weird filters, excessive selfies, or AI enhancements that make you look not human.

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• On profile vulnerability:
  “If you’re actually looking for a partner, you gotta do stuff that's messy in order for it to happen. You gotta take risks.” – Galia (73:11)
• General dating fatigue:
  “You go on, have some dates, and someone breaks your heart. That’s just the grind.” – Galia (81:19)
• Good photo advice:
  “Women are more accepting of bad teeth than guys are. The bar for men is just so low…” – Harley (69:04)
• Philosophy of movie choices:
  “I find myself resistant to anyone society tells me I’m SUPPOSED to love.” – Galia (48:54)
• On cutting out the cringe:
  “You have to get over the cringe curve to put out effort on your profile.” – David (72:44)

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Timestamps for Major Segments

• 00:07 – Friday energy, banter, Gabe chat
• 04:47 – Shambhala & festival stories
• 13:21 – John Goodman, Hollywood hot takes
• 16:36 – Tom Holland, “frog in the mouth”, Spider-Man debate
• 36:47 – Movie opinions, director styles
• 60:09 – Transition to dating profiles
• 61:46 – Lorenzo's profile analysis begins
• 78:42 – Kelly’s “references from friends” profile
• 90:16 – Arielle, “gold star lesbian” and spicy profile
• 102:19 – Summer, therapist seeking authenticity, lightning storm!
• 126:19 – Jubu (Rare Mask Lesbian) deep dive and panel’s favorite voice note
• 159:09 – Technical difficulties & more quick-fire ratings
• 175:03 – Ending with “soupies” (superchat readings), guest thank-yous, and H3 in-jokes

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Panel Tone, Vibe & Language

• Tone is irreverent, honest, queer-friendly, and self-deprecating.
• Roasts delivered with laughter—be prepared for off-color metaphors and references to “ass crack,” “backpacks” (lesbian euphemism), and festival wildness.
• Warm, encouraging to real fans: “You just need to show up and try. Don’t half-ass it.”
• Loads of inside jokes and meta-commentary (e.g., “hold it like it’s your dick, Ethan”—Galia, [178:53]).

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Final Thoughts

• The H3 crew gives both actionable, real advice and swaggering, absurdist fun.
• Regardless of your profile woes: "Someone will vibe with your true self. Don’t let shame or cringe hold you back."
• If you’re afraid of “being cringe,” this episode is a powerful antidote.

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Memorable Ending:
"Hold it like it’s your dick, Ethan." – Galia (178:53)

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For Fans:

This episode is a wild ride through the chaos of dating app culture, with roasts, heartfelt advice, millennial/Gen Z humor, and a healthy dose of queer joy. If you’re looking for profile tips and the comfort of knowing we’re all disasters together, this H3 After Dark is for you.

Transcript

[Kate]

Three, two.

[Harley]

What up? What up?

[Galia]

Happy Friday.

[Harley]

Big Friday. Real Friday.

[Galia]

Real Friday time. Not fake little baby Friday. Nope. This is the real one. Hi, Harley.

[Harley]

How you doing?

[Galia]

Pretty good. How are you?

[Harley]

It's Friday.

[Galia]

It's Friday. We have a.

[Harley]

Like, the guy. Like, the guy. Like, the guy on the couch.

[Galia]

Gabe.

[Harley]

I don't give a what his name is. No, I'm kidding. I love that guy.

[Galia]

Shout out Gabe. We love Gabe.

[Harley]

Yes. We love G. Also, we love Gia.

[Galia]

And Galia is here.

[David]

Hi, there. Hi. Everyone in her. How are you?

[Galia]

In her home? Not.

[David]

I'm not visiting. Not visiting anyone.

[Galia]

Not.

[Harley]

Ethan said you were visiting me.

[David]

Yeah, I was, like, not happening.

[Galia]

That was cute.

[Harley]

You mean not happening. I'm gonna get you in the monkey cage one of these days.

[Galia]

Jesus Christ.

[David]

Oh, my God.

[Galia]

No monkey cages.

[Harley]

I saw you saying Kate. You were like, my RV will be different. I will be in a separate rv.

[Galia]

I will be separate. We will have cutlery. It will be a very different dude.

[Harley]

He had access. We literally had access to the. We had access to the artist section.

[Galia]

That is cool.

[Harley]

You're like the piss bucket was. Because we were pissing in our toilet in the rv, we had to get rid of it. But we also had. We had access to, like, the artist section with. With multiple bathrooms, sinks, showers.

[Galia]

Okay, so cutlery.

[Harley]

The fact that Tyler didn't want to go walk, like, three minutes to go get a wooden fork and wanted to eat his smoke voices off the syringe. That's just good content.

[Galia]

Literally everything about that makes me sick.

[Harley]

It's crazy. Heroin hero shirt look weird.

[Kate]

Can we shout out Galia's sick ass? DeLorean, real quick.

[Galia]

Oh, my God.

[David]

Thank you.

[Galia]

That was a cool ass.

[David]

I knew someone would notice that. I paid a lot for that thing, you know?

[Galia]

Yeah.

[David]

So I'm glad you liked it.

[Kate]

Big fan.

[Galia]

That was awesome.

[Harley]

Yeah, it was sick.

[Galia]

That was incredible. Go ahead, Galia.

[David]

Yeah, I just wanted to say, like, I don't really like AI art, just so you know. I really like the real thing, the real car. So I build it myself. It's not AI.

[Harley]

I'll have you know. I'll have you know that in that video right there, AI did not generate a single pixel.

[Galia]

Hang on one second. David, do you have your mic?

[Harley]

What do you. What do you. Where the are you?

[Kate]

I think there is a mic somewhere.

[Harley]

Open.

[Galia]

Oh, okay.

[Harley]

You sound like you're in the marketplace in Aladdin.

[Galia]

What's going on the street market?

[Harley]

What is that riff raff street rat going on back there?

[Kate]

Figure out what that is. And I'll.

[Harley]

It sounds like a boo.

[Galia]

I like doing street rat with my friends. Do you remember that?

[Harley]

Literally. Yeah, it sounds like a boo. Getting gaped at the office right now.

[Galia]

No one's getting gaped. I really did love the video, though, to be honest. I thought it was wonderful.

[Harley]

And. And the DeLorean.

[Ethan]

Oh, yes.

[Harley]

Single pixel generated.

[Galia]

Nope, that was all good.

[Harley]

No, it's. No, it's a 3D model. A 3D model of a DeLorean, which is super easy to find.

[Galia]

Cool.

[Harley]

And what you do is you painstakingly key frame that car over her car, bit by bit. Painstakingly, you know, but fortunately, I didn't have to do that.

[David]

No one else believe you. Like, no one is going to believe you. It's just right after, like, with your reputation, Harley, no one is going to believe you. This is just. AI.

[Galia]

Yeah.

[Harley]

Oh, no, it is, but it is AI. But it's not AI generating the car.

[David]

Yeah, it is. It is. I'm saying it right now. It is generating the car.

[Harley]

Oh, it's not.

[Galia]

Oh, yeah.

[David]

Yes, it is. Like, prove it. How can you prove it? It is. It's only.

[Harley]

I can prove it. No, I could prove that. I could prove that. I could show you. I could show you the. The DeLorean model and I could show you the keyframe project of it. Yeah, I could do that.

[David]

Do it right now.

[Kate]

Yeah, pull it up.

[David]

I'll.

[Kate]

I'll bring your screen sharing.

[Harley]

Well, let me go get. Let me go get my MacBook.

[Galia]

No, everyone.

[Harley]

What? Let's do it.

[David]

No, I'm just kidding. I was just like. I was giving you a taste of your own medicine where you call everything AI. So.

[Harley]

But it is AI.

[David]

Oh, my God.

[Galia]

It is AI who did that.

[Harley]

I just came forward. Just keep chill. I just came forward.

[David]

I know that it's AI. I know that it's. It's okay.

[Harley]

Oh, my God.

[Kate]

After Dark's in 3D now.

[Galia]

I wanted to. Before. I want to talk about Shamal. Let's talk about Shambala.

[Harley]

I. Dude, there's some sick. There's sick bits in there that I. That I guess I get. I guess.

[Kate]

I guess Australian cops here,

[Harley]

I think. I guess Ethan just wants to treat the. The members, right.

[Galia]

Yeah.

[Harley]

I mean, personally, I. You know, I think all the audience is great, but he's got something nice for the members. We were thinking about spending money because it's a lot. It's. It's a lot. I think he. I. I think he. Like, I think some of the better parts are not we're not there.

[Galia]

Okay. So some nice morsels for the members.

[David]

A.

[Harley]

That's what I'm saying. I'd stand on that.

[Galia]

Yeah. I'm excited to see the full cut now. I waited until the show to, like, watch was great. You guys did a really, really good job.

[Harley]

Ab.

[Galia]

Proud of you.

[Harley]

AB Worked really, really fast.

[Galia]

Yeah, really fast.

[Harley]

That's like. Like that and editing. Editing a cut like that. And also that was like cut number 10 or something.

[Galia]

Wow.

[Harley]

I think that's really good. I did help a little at the beginning, like, offloading all my footage, and I laid it out on a timeline chronologically for me. He ended up using all that footage. So much legwork. So he was locked in on that.

[Galia]

I loved the narration. Like, it really felt like Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas. Right? Like, the. The narration of him being like, Harley is out of his mind.

[Harley]

Wait till we send him to Ukraine.

[Galia]

He's going.

[David]

I'm so excited about that. Next week we're going to Ukraine.

[Galia]

Let's go. Wheels up, baby. It's happening.

[David]

I want to know some. Do you want to know some BTs behind, like, the editing part of it? I was asking everyone because we basically were releasing the T shirt at the same time. So I was just like, guys, do you know when are we doing this segment? When is it coming? Or what about, like, our editing? How does it look? And AB is like, yeah, I'm working on it. He. He called me. And then Harley is typing at the same time in our chat, and he's like typing a long message like he usually does, and it's like, yeah, so with this in progress, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And then, like, within two to three weeks, I will be able to tell you the date. I'm like, oh, that's hardly time.

[Galia]

Okay.

[David]

He's like, I don't. I cannot estimate right now, but, like, in two to three weeks, I will be able to estimate the actual date.

[Galia]

I'm like, he gave him a nice, nice, big buffer.

[Harley]

Welcome to show business, Scalia, where you under promise and over deliver. And, you know, I. I actually. I'll be honest, Vira AB, I would never turn around something that fast. Bro is like messaging me at 4am to turn it around. So if I. In my head, I was just like, you don't. You don't really. You actually don't get. You don't get kudos for anything like that.

[David]

I agree.

[Galia]

You can do it that speed. So everything is.

[Harley]

Yeah. Now it's expected.

[David]

Yeah. Yeah. And you can do it faster. Probably because it's your second time. It's not going to be your first time, you know, like the thing or, like, exactly. So every single time. We're gonna expect it, like, in 24 hours. Next.

[Galia]

Yeah, Hotcakes, let's go.

[David]

Yep.

[Galia]

Yeah, it was.

[Harley]

I didn't expect him to actually edit it that fast. Like, he did.

[Galia]

It was crazy how fast he worked so hard on it. And I'm excited to see what comes next. I do have a question about Shambhala. Just about the vibes. I know there's, like a lot of naked people, but related to the dump them out sign, is Shambhala a place where you're, like, flashing your tits?

[Harley]

No, but there are people. There are people that walk around naked. It's always the guys with the smallest penises that like to walk around naked.

[Galia]

Yeah.

[Kate]

So I'm always like, you're looking.

[Harley]

I'd be seeing it. My eye. My eye doesn't. My eye doesn't rest on it for. For long, but I'd be seeing it. I've been seeing it.

[Galia]

You see a little tingle, dingle. That's okay.

[Harley]

And you, you'll get, like. A lot of people like to wear those shirts that are see through, tits out.

[Galia]

Oh, like. Like a fish. Like a fish.

[Harley]

Like a whole body suit. A whole bodysuit.

[Galia]

Whoa.

[Harley]

I'm gonna wear, like, like a string bikini and like a helmet.

[Galia]

All right, I'll pack my. I'll pack my full mesh bodysuit, then let's go.

[Harley]

I'll bring my small penis.

[David]

It's a good question. You're like, Candy's like, randomly asking, so are there any tits around that festival?

[Galia]

Asking if I would go, what's this?

[Harley]

What's how often you see tits there? People pull their tits out.

[Galia]

Just like, ballpark it. Like, how many in a day would you say?

[David]

And you see what she did there? She immediately went like, okay, I will bring my suit with me. Oh, you're going now? Now that you.

[Galia]

Now that I know the tits are out, she's going.

[Harley]

Yeah, she's got to go.

[Galia]

I. I follow a comedian and she is licking wood. I don't even know why I had said that, but I always be saying it's true. I learned from the best.

[Harley]

Who's the comedian?

[Galia]

Oh, trailer trash Tammy.

[Harley]

Oh.

[Galia]

And she. I mean, everywhere she goes, people flash their tits at her. And she has like a whole. She does a. A cruise, like, trailer. Taylor. Oh, my God. Tammy's pontoon party. And everyone apparently is just. It's just like, girls Gone wild. But it's all like women in their 40s just flashing tits. Like you go to a comedy show. Like you go to one of her, her events. I've been there, and everyone's just like whipping them out. And so I didn't know if that was the vibe.

[Harley]

This community could definitely have a cruise. You could set one up like the H3. Like a family cruise, definitely. I know, I know wrestlers with smaller audiences that, that have pulled this off.

[David]

Oh, yeah.

[Galia]

That's like a thing now. Yeah. JoJo Siwa shared a cruise with other people.

[Harley]

So we also have like a music, like a electronic music cruise. Also. A lot of the DJs from Shambhala will be on.

[Galia]

That makes sense. That totally makes sense.

[David]

Shambhala on a cruise. That sounds.

[Harley]

It's just the music, though. They definitely. I don't know if I'd be taking drugs in international waters like that.

[Galia]

Someone said, Someone said permission to flash you if I ever meet you, Kate. No, no, no, no permission to flash me.

[Harley]

But I might suck on them.

[Galia]

Not. I don't know what setting it would be in. In an audience is one thing, but yeah, just coming up to me like Panera Bread. Yeah, Like a dmv. TGI Fridays and just whipping them out.

[David]

Dmv. And yeah, just flashes you and you're like, oh, that's this thing and that's

[Galia]

like, I do a podcast and tits are like a whole part of it. It's like just a thing.

[David]

Anyway, but I was gonna say about Shambhala, me personally, I had such a nightmare bad trip just from the call on Monday. And then I saw the guys on Tuesday when I picked them up. So by the time I went home, I had a busy day. I fell asleep, like at 6pm and I woke up from Harley calling me on Discord in my dream. And like, I, I, I answered the call and it's like him from the RV and he's like, go, are we gonna do this again? I pulled up from that. That felt like such a bad trip for me from, like.

[Harley]

It's crazy. That just, it just literally just me on the phone is a nightmare. I felt like. And he had a knife. He was gonna just like, I saw Harley's face

[David]

and then the RV at the background. The RV made it like the RV was the thing.

[Galia]

Yeah, you were like, I'm still stuck there, even though I never actually went.

[Harley]

Rinstein.

[Galia]

Damn. She got a contact acid high from you guys picking you up. She's still having flashbacks. That's crazy. Oh, my Lord. Oh, I wanted to show you guys something. As I literally, as I sat down and was like, setting up the show, I see on, like a home page, it just says John Goodman. And of course you think, oh, he's dead. Right? That was my first thought. And I was really scared and sad because he's just like TV dad to me. And. Oh, I was gonna say that. I was gonna make you guys guess who this is, but now you don't have to guess. Look at this picture of him. He does not look well. I hope he's okay. Apparently he lost like 200 plus pounds.

[Harley]

You just sound like people watching Ethan.

[Galia]

No, I. Listen, I. I loved. I loved chubby John Goodman. If this is him healthier, okay. But yeah, he just looks like one foot in. You know what I mean?

[Kate]

It's gray.

[Galia]

Yeah, gray, gray. Like very, very palate.

[Harley]

How old is this guy now? 80.

[Galia]

Oh, my God, I hope he's not 80.

[Harley]

70.

[Kate]

I was saying he looks like the guy from. From Monster 74. Steve Buscemi plays. But they're. I'm with a bunch of boomers. I didn't get that reference.

[Galia]

74 is. David, you Coco Melon yourself right now. I don't know what the.

[Kate]

Cocomelon. Big news for me that Galia shared. There's a new cocomelon movie coming out.

[Galia]

Yeah.

[David]

Yeah. I did send it to David yesterday and tagged him.

[Kate]

I already got my. My IMAX 40x tickets.

[Harley]

Is it live action Cocoa Melon?

[David]

Kind of. It's an animation.

[Harley]

I think it's playing Coco and Robert Pison playing melon.

[Galia]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[David]

And Zendaya is like the God of melons there. Yeah. Something. Yeah.

[Kate]

I'm already hearing the Oscar buzz.

[Galia]

Yeah. David, you are gonna need to go see that and give us a review. So just so you know.

[Kate]

All right.

[Galia]

It'll help. It'll be nice to remember just like coughing at your iPad and watching that, you know?

[David]

Yeah. But did you see the new Spider man movie?

[Kate]

No, I. I've had no time to do anything, so I have not seen it yet. But he.

[Harley]

Galia, he literally just finished editing Shambala. How could he have watched Spider Man?

[David]

Oh, yeah, yeah, I did. I did.

[Kate]

The DeLorean does everything. I did the DeLorean.

[Harley]

He literally 3D. Yeah, he. He did that. He put the. The DeLorean over there, painstakingly keyframe reframing it every single.

[Galia]

Can I ask a question about Spider man and choices in general? What is the draw of Tom Holland? Because he sucked in the Odyssey. Right.

[Harley]

But, but, but Spider Man Is just

[Galia]

like, where's my dad?

[Harley]

It is crazy. Yeah, but that's like.

[David]

That's, like his character. So, like, Tom Holland in real life. He is almost, like, specifically like, someone

[Galia]

almost like, like, grew him in a lab.

[David]

Grew him as a spider man.

[Harley]

Someone groomed him at the Magic Castle.

[Galia]

But, like, David getting groomed.

[David]

Yeah. It feels like a lab project from his parents. And they were just making him a spider man from day one, since he was born. Because he, like, he acts like Spider man even when he is, like, not in the movie. That's, like, his whole personality, and it is. I do really love Tom Holland. I. I did not, like, hate him in the Odyssey. I think he was good. I did not, like, hate him like Kate did, but also, like, he's much better in Spider man. And you have to see him in Spider man first. So then you have, like, this filter.

[Galia]

I can tell you I'm not gonna like him in Spider.

[Harley]

Someone. Someone said once, they said he looks like he's always hiding a frog in his mouth. It is very distracting. It's one of those things that distracts me forever. Just like Tom Cruise's middle tooth once. You know what?

[Galia]

He has a middle tooth in the middle.

[Harley]

Once you see it, you never stop seeing it.

[Galia]

Shut the up. All right, hang on. Let's look at Tom Holland first. Oh, yeah, That's a frog in the mouth right there. Or like, he used to have braces, right? He, like, still holds his mouth like he had braces. I don't know, guys. He gave me nothing in the Odyssey. I feel like people are lying when they say they like him in the Odyssey.

[Harley]

At least I don't know he didn't get in the way.

[Galia]

No.

[David]

Are you calling me a liar? Are you calling me a liar?

[Galia]

Yeah.

[David]

What the. I just told you I liked him.

[Galia]

Wait, but. Okay, what did you. What did you like about him in. In the Odyssey?

[David]

So it's kind of weird because I do have this previous affection for him. So that's why, like, I have this, like, understanding of who he is as a person. So that's how. It's, like, very hard for me to criticize him, per se.

[Harley]

You like his skin color? You like his skin?

[Galia]

I want to wear his skin.

[David]

I also appreciate Tom Holland being short and not, like, a tall guy. And he's. He's, like, one of.

[Harley]

That's his worst quality.

[David]

He's one of a few short guys that people like, and I feel like he's bringing this short king energy into.

[Harley]

Well, how tall is he?

[Galia]

Not Is he not? How tall is he not? I don't know. How tall is he?

[Kate]

How not tall is he?

[Galia]

Let's find out. Let me look it up.

[Kate]

I think he's like five seven.

[Ethan]

I don't know.

[Galia]

They're just like.

[Harley]

No, they're five seven. That's too much. Not enough tall, five seven.

[David]

I don't know.

[Galia]

There just wasn't like range. Like, there was no emotional range to it.

[Harley]

Well, what about the fact that normally he speaks like this when he's not acting? He sounds like this brav. All right, where's me Spider man costume mummy?

[David]

Since we were talking about the Odyssey, can I tell you guys how I went to see that movie?

[Galia]

Oh, yes, yes. Go figure.

[David]

I actually. I actually did pre. Like, I wanted to tell I had like two unique experiences. Was watching two different movies with Tom Holland and both of them sucked for different reasons. But with the Odyssey, I pre ordered like the 70 millimeter cinematic experience with IMAX.

[Ethan]

Whatever.

[David]

But then. Yeah, but thank you. But then when I went in, it was a really old movie theater, like, to the point where I think it was like from the 70s.

[Harley]

It smells like cigarettes.

[David]

Exactly. It smells awful. It. And the whole, like, seat arrangement, it was completely sold out. And the whole seat arrangement was so close to each other that my. I kid you not. My knees were in between the guys in front of me, like, head like, oh my God.

[Harley]

This is.

[David]

This was like. This was like my right knee and my left knee and right in front of the guy, like in front of me. And it was so tight and like you recline, so it goes back and then like the knees of. Of a guy besides you. And everyone is in Canada is really tall. So I don't know how they built that or whatever. So everyone's like. I can see on like in the row. Everyone's knees is right in front of the person in front of them. And the Christopher Nolan's movies are really, really loud. So whenever you do that in a really old theater. Oh God, that felt like a 4Dx cinema experience.

[Harley]

You should have just. Every time it was loud, you should have grabbed the knees behind you and just squished them on your headphones.

[David]

So you're shaking with the whole theater at the guy in front of you. Like, you're knees are going basically, like from.

[Galia]

Oh my God.

[David]

It was so insanely weird. But I felt like I was inside of the Trojan Horse the. The whole time. So I felt like all of us are just right. Yeah.

[Galia]

Pissing and puking on each other. Yeah.

[David]

And I was like, yeah, the front rows are gonna get killed. I'm sorry for you guys.

[Harley]

The first ones to drown.

[David]

Yeah, the tide is coming in, so all of you are gonna die. So. That was, like, such an insane thing. I have never experienced something like this before, but it was like, such an old, smelly, awful experience. But I still enjoyed the movie and I still liked all of this. I was like, that was so weird, but it kind of, like, made it more. I was keeping my head really high, not. Not looking at everyone besides me. And I was, like, really focused on the movie the whole time because I could not focus on my legs being in front of someone in front of me.

[Galia]

I just, like, subconsciously keep twitching and. And hitting the guy in front of me.

[David]

But 70 millimeters, so I got to see that.

[Galia]

And you.

[Harley]

If you can't even get a ticket till next year in, like, places like LA and New York, they're flying out of those cities to go buy tickets elsewhere.

[Galia]

That's bananas. Okay. People are saying that Tom Holland is apparently a. A gay blind spot for me. So do we just like him because he's. He is sexy? Because. I'm just talking about the actors. People in Chat are like, he's so hot. Like, okay, well, I didn't see how he. How's the acting?

[David]

I think he's really good.

[Kate]

I think I like him as an actor.

[David]

Yeah. Thank you. David. I was waiting for you to say something.

[Kate]

Listen, I don't see much. I'm going to put you on blast a little bit. You said, I'm not convinced about Robert Pattinson yet, which is.

[Galia]

I'm not.

[Kate]

L. Take. L. I'm not.

[Galia]

I think he's being rammed down our throats for whatever reason. I haven't seen.

[Ethan]

I wish.

[Galia]

I. I just haven't seen enough to really think that he's super outstanding. You know what I mean? Like, I. There are. There are female actors, actresses that I think are gorgeous, but I never want to see a movie that they're in because they are terrible actors.

[Kate]

Oh, yeah. Name one. Name one. Put a woman down right now.

[David]

Yeah.

[Galia]

Who do I think is hot, but. But not a good actress.

[Harley]

Denzel Washington.

[Galia]

Who's not good. I don't know. I. I'm trying to think of someone and my. My brain just goes blank.

[Kate]

That's the thing.

[Galia]

Jennifer Aniston. No, I would never. She's pretty. Not my type. And also, no, I don't want to see her in a movie. I don't think that she's like, actress. Yeah. It was Good. It was all right. Yeah, it was good.

[David]

It was sad.

[Harley]

Oh, you ever see the Good Girl?

[David]

No.

[Harley]

Oh, I think that's what it's called. The Good Girl.

[Galia]

Sounds familiar.

[Harley]

Yeah, she's like. She's like. She's married to John C. Reilly and like, as a relationship. What's it called?

[Galia]

Megan Fox. Thank you. Megan Fox is a good one. Hot and not all that talented. Although I thought she was perfect for Jennifer's body.

[Harley]

That movie's so good.

[Galia]

That movie is so.

[Harley]

Movie's really, really, really good. Underrated. What a great old school ish horror movie that the guys. If you haven't seen it for is a good one. Probably worth a re. Watch. Yeah, that. That surprised me.

[Galia]

So maybe. Maybe Spider man is Tom Holland's Jennifer's body. Does that make sense?

[Harley]

If Jennifer's body. If he did it three times and they all made over a billion dollars.

[Galia]

Yeah.

[Harley]

And then if Jennifer's body started dating Paul Atreides betrothed.

[Galia]

Yeah.

[Kate]

God damn.

[Galia]

Sydney Sweeney is another one.

[Kate]

Yeah, I'm Nick donated said Kate Gurley. You gotta actually watch stuff to form opinions like this.

[Harley]

No, she doesn't. It's the Internet, dude. I. I was about to talk Spider man with Galia and I saw 20 minutes of it on Twitter and then I. And then the rest of the movie I heard about from a friend. I don't know if you know how goes these days, but no one has to do anything. But we definitely.

[Galia]

But I watched it in the Odyssey and that's what I was talking about. I wasn't.

[Harley]

We're just getting warmed up, dude.

[Galia]

I wasn't saying he was sucky in Spider Man. I haven't seen.

[Harley]

But you saw the Odyssey sucked a lot of people.

[Galia]

Why should I be basing his acting in the Odyssey on anything but the odds?

[Harley]

Who are you talking to now? You talking to now?

[Kate]

Well, no, you.

[Galia]

That's what she.

[David]

She's talking to the chat.

[Harley]

She's yelling at the chat. We got g. We got Gia right here. You're yelling at the chat. Don't listen to them. Step back. You're in boomer mode. I could tell when you're reading because you got to go in. You're like, why shouldn't I?

[David]

She full on was like, she's acting like.

[Galia]

Yeah, she's like, she's reading. No, I am. I am basing my opinion of Tom Holland on the. I have seen Tom Holland. I didn't think Ed Hathaway did that great of a job either.

[David]

I think a lot of people Agree with you. When underused. They did not like the Tom Holland's performance in the office.

[Ethan]

Yes.

[David]

And that's all I could say, guys.

[Galia]

Yeah, that's all I'm saying.

[David]

I did like, how?

[Kate]

Well, no, you call him a bad actor.

[David]

Oh, yeah.

[Galia]

I didn't call him a. I called him a bad actor.

[David]

Because of that. Because of that. She can't.

[Galia]

Shut the fuck up, David.

[David]

She can assume he's a bad actor because she paid for that experience and she did not like him there. It's okay. But I was gonna say that. Sorry, David.

[Kate]

Oh, no, go for it.

[David]

In the Spider man movie in the theater. And this time, I did not pre order my tickets, so everything was sold out. And I got the seats where like, this. The. Oh, my God. The. Oh, my God. What is it called?

[Harley]

4DX.

[David]

No, no, no, no, no. I just got, like, my auditorium. I will call it this.

[Galia]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[David]

It did not, like. It did not separate adults and kids. So it was, like, a lot of kids in my theater with me. A bunch of kids. And I knew.

[Harley]

They don't know how the fuck to be either these days.

[David]

I know. And I knew, like, okay, I'm gonna have to watch this movie with kids. It's okay. I'm totally fine with that. But the whole movie, there were, like, me, my husband, and then an old dude on the left of me, and then, like, two kids there and two kids there. And, like, all the kids are around us, so they don't. They don't laugh at some jokes when they're, like, too complicated and they don't understand, but they are, like, just amazed by Tom Holland and, like, everything that he does. So at one moment, it's kind of like a serious moment there, but it's not that, like, emotional or anything. I turn to my left and the kid, like, right in front of that old dude is just sobbing, crying. And, like, he's, like, weeps so loudly. And I cannot stop laughing at that. Like, it just made me, like. Because it's not an emotional scene at all. It's like a comedic scene going on. And he just, like.

[Galia]

He just says it's going slop.

[Harley]

What the is he laughing at?

[David]

He's crying.

[Galia]

They got him.

[David]

He just sees Tom Holland. He starts, like, weeping, cried. And I cannot, like. I'm trying to contain my laugh because I cannot, like. I cannot laugh out loud at him. It's like, the funniest thing I've ever seen. And, like, my husband's like, what's going on? What's Going on. And I cannot point to the guy and say, like, this dude is crying at 80 years old. Look at this dumbass. So I'm, like, starting laughing even more. I. I turn, like, red. I cannot stop. It's literally me.

[Galia]

Like, they're like.

[David]

Like, everybody thinks, like, I'm about to, like, throw up or anything. I don't know. And then, like, the two dudes on the right, they're like 10 years old. So the movie ends and they're like, I kid you not. They look at each other and they're like, this is the best movie in my life. And my husband is like, what life? Like, how many movies did you see? Like, two?

[Galia]

Did you see, like, two?

[David]

Spider Man 1, Spider Man 2, and Spider Man 3.

[Harley]

I can't think of a movie that banged as hard as this since the Minecraft movie.

[Kate]

Right?

[Galia]

Chicken Jockey or whatever. The.

[Harley]

They were all, dude, we gotta get. We gotta get home. They're adding the Punisher to Fortnite.

[David]

It is exactly that theater. I wasn't that exact theater. And everyone was like. And the kid who's, like, 8 years old, he's like, I'm. I'm not kidding. That movie ends and he's like, absolute cinema.

[Galia]

Oh, Lord.

[David]

I like. I wonder if you even know who are you referencing there? Because.

[Galia]

Yeah, pretty ironic. Pretty.

[Kate]

The old dude in the picture.

[Galia]

Yeah, the old guy.

[Kate]

I love when kids cry. Not, like, in a weird way. It's just. It's so funny how kids cry where they're like.

[Galia]

Yeah, like, they can't.

[Harley]

Ugly cry.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Galia]

Oh, eight. He was eight. Okay. Okay. I was like, oh, my God.

[David]

Like, imagine, like, someone a bit older than Teddy, just, like, ugly crying. It's, like, super weepy. And it's, like, so loud. It's like, through the whole theater. Everyone can hear that. And I'm just like, oh, my God.

[Harley]

Going through it like, where's my Mr. B?

[Galia]

Listen, I'm glad he found something and he finds so much joy in. David, you sent me nudes you didn't ask for.

[Harley]

Weird.

[Ethan]

Yeah.

[Galia]

Also that our HR Will be.

[Kate]

No, this is just a video of Tom Holland.

[Harley]

HR Will be jerking you off. David for that.

[Galia]

Okay, this is. This.

[Kate]

Thank you.

[Galia]

This is Tom Holland Holland predicting his own future.

[Harley]

What?

[Galia]

I want to play maybe. Maybe Spider man in, like, 10 years time.

[Harley]

Oh, boy Wants to play Spider Man.

[Galia]

Hey, he wants to play Spider man in it. First ever celebrity crush. Oh, the bird.

[Harley]

Oh, I mean, I like the bird from Euphoria. Right? Such a bad.

[Galia]

She's a better me.

[David]

It's so bad for him.

[Galia]

Favorite video game is this little game called Uncharted. Oh, man. He's in the movie. Is that what that is?

[David]

Yeah, I think so.

[Galia]

Wow. You could be in a movie with any three actors, alive or dead. Who would you pick?

[Ethan]

J.

[Galia]

Well, yeah, he's. He's a celebrity. He can, like, make his destiny now, right? He says, and it happens.

[Kate]

Multiverse in which I don't work like that.

[Harley]

I've been saying a lot of Kaden, it never happened if.

[Galia]

No, but he's. If. I'm not saying, like, in that moment, it happened, but, like, as he became more famous, he got more pull to be able to say, I want to work with Jake Gyllenhaal. I want to have this in the Spider man movie.

[Harley]

You don't think I want me. In job?

[Galia]

Oh, I want me angel

[Harley]

with my job.

[David]

Oh, my God. I don't like us making fun of Tom Holland because he's, like, the only normal dude.

[Galia]

He seems very sweet. I just didn't think he had any range in the Odyssey.

[Kate]

And you don't like Robert Patton. What do you think of Robert Pattinson? The Odyssey?

[Harley]

She hates Spider man and Batman.

[Ethan]

Dude.

[Galia]

I thought Robert Pattinson was a good, like, sniveling villain. I wish I'd seen more of him.

[Harley]

What's the movie where he plays all the Robert Pattinsons? Just came out. Mickey 17, if you watch that, there's a really good thing to know that makes the movie even better is that he had to play two Robert Pattersons with different. Different personalities. So he watched a lot of Ren and Stimpy, and one of the Robert Pattinson is acting like Ren, and the other one's acting like Stimpy. And when you know that and you know he's doing the exercise of executing on acting as Ren and Stimpy, it kind of makes that movie a bit better.

[Galia]

Interesting. Okay. I. I am open to being convinced

[Kate]

it's a good movie. I think it went by too quickly. People didn't like it very much, but I. I really with it. Mickey 17.

[Galia]

Yeah, I am interested in the Chris Hansen movie.

[Harley]

That's so crazy. I don't really so crazy.

[Galia]

I mean, I guess because I've seen Robert Pattinson kind of in, like, a darker role. I can see it a little bit now because they're kind of playing Chris Hansen as the villain, which I think is really interesting. I guess we'll find out if he was, like, the right choice for that. We'll find out. We will find out.

[Harley]

It's either him or Matt Demon.

[Kate]

Spoiler alert. He is.

[Galia]

See, but this is. This is the spoiler alert.

[Harley]

Robert Pattinson's sick. All these white dudes are awesome.

[Galia]

He can do no wrong. I liked him in one thing and now I love him and everything. I just don't vibe with that.

[Kate]

No, no, because. No, because it's the opposite. It's the opposite. Everyone's like, I hated him in Twilight, so he's a bad actor forever. It's the exact opposite.

[David]

Yeah. It's kind of like I never saw Twilight, so you never saw Twilight.

[Kate]

You can't have any opinion on it. On. On Robert Pattinson

[Galia]

movie he sucked in.

[Ethan]

No.

[Kate]

Any of his movies. You haven't seen a single one of his movies other than the Odyssey.

[Galia]

Literally just saw the Odyssey. But.

[Kate]

Okay, name one more. I'll give you a thousand dollars.

[David]

It's not that he was bad in it. It's that he didn't want to be good in it to that point where he's like laughing in camera, like while filming it because he knows how bad

[Galia]

the movie is in on the joke.

[David]

He was like, not having it. He was just for the vibes. Yeah. I think he wanted to quit, like in the middle of the first movie or something. He just wanted to quit his role because he hated all of that being there. And I think he just. I'm really. It's a comeback story for him on how he could overcome that background of being the advert guy and just become actually a good actor.

[Harley]

Overcome.

[Galia]

Overcome. All right, let's see if I've seen anything else with him in it. Did I see the Batman movie with him?

[Kate]

Girl, don't.

[David]

I don't.

[Kate]

Bffr. Bffr. You went to go see Batman three and a half hour Batman movie.

[Ethan]

No.

[David]

Yeah.

[Kate]

I'm saying of all people went to go see a three hour Batman movie. Yeah. Good luck convincing us of that.

[Galia]

It doesn't.

[David]

If I had to bet like 1k on that. On the fact that you did not watch that.

[Harley]

We told her to watch. We told you to watch Good Times. We told you to watch Good Times.

[Kate]

Yeah. Good Time is. Is my favorite movie of his. Is Good Time.

[Galia]

When was. When was that? When I'm on IMDb right now.

[Harley]

Recently is like within the last six years

[Galia]

lately.

[Harley]

Is it that eight years?

[Kate]

It was before Uncut Gems and Uncut Gems was like four years ago, I think.

[Ethan]

Yeah.

[Harley]

But there's a couple. I feel like. I feel like a couple years. It was the next 27. They did know. Have you guys ever seen nine years. That's crazy.

[David]

Have you ever seen Remember Me?

[Galia]

Remember Me? What's that one?

[David]

It's a movie with Robert Patterson. But it's, it's hard for me to rate it because I saw it when I was 2010.

[Galia]

Oh.

[David]

I saw it when I, first of all, I was in high school. And second of all, I was watching it probably in Russian and, like, dubbed in, where it's like. It's a totally different movie, so it's hard for me to rate it, but I remember liking it as a junior in high school, so.

[Galia]

Okay.

[David]

Give that what you want.

[Galia]

Well, yeah, it's like a 2010. Looks like a rom com kind of thing.

[Kate]

Did you watch.

[Galia]

It's a.

[Kate]

Did you watch the Lighthouse, or were

[Harley]

you jacked off on a mermaid?

[Galia]

I did not see that when I saw no Sparks.

[Harley]

I love it. He jacks off on a mermaid.

[Galia]

Hey, I just Venmo'd you for rent.

[Ethan]

Nice. Now I can instantly spend it, whether I'm checking out online with Venmo or using a Venmo debit card.

[Galia]

Say more.

[Ethan]

More. Exactly. Because the more you do with Venmo, the more you get, like, earning up to 5% cash back with Venmo stash on a bundle of brands.

[Galia]

So order more pizza.

[Ethan]

The math demands it.

[Galia]

Get the Venmo debit card.

[Ethan]

Venmo stash bundle terms and exclusions apply. See terms at venmo me term venmo checkout not available at all merchants. Venmo MasterCard is issued by the Bancorp Bank.

[Harley]

Na can.

[Galia]

Okay, never mind. You guys are just gonna hate all my movie takes.

[Ethan]

Why?

[Harley]

Little Little Women was All right.

[Galia]

Eggers. Eggers and Tarantino. I feel like all their movies are the same. Like, they all look the same. Wes Anderson, too. They're just doing the same movie over and over again. Is that wrong?

[Kate]

We're not going to hate on Wes Anderson here. I, I, I'm not, I'm not allowing it. I'm not allowing it. Get out. Bye.

[Galia]

I enjoy the movies, but it is the same aesthetic over and over again. Right?

[David]

Isn't it the whole point of art

[Galia]

to do the same thing over and over again?

[David]

It's like saying, like, Picasso is doing the same shit all over.

[Galia]

Well, Picasso's is in a whole other

[Harley]

Picasso.

[Kate]

Kate hates another man.

[Harley]

Wait, hold on. Are you, Are you. I'm about to drop Picasso allegations on me right now.

[Galia]

Oh, yeah. He was a total bag. No, but his art changed over time.

[Ethan]

A lot.

[Harley]

Yeah, he, he came out the the gate doing. Yeah, painting. Like, like Just real life style. Like he can paint perfectly well. And then he just, he just ascended and ascended into the point that he was. Yeah, exactly. And now. Yeah. But he knows how to, he knows how to do it. But it is kind of like, it's like, it's, it's, it's directors, it's their stamp, it's their signature. It's like hearing an artist and be like, ah, second, this guy's. Hear this guy singing on this Michael Jackson song again. Sounds exactly like the guy in the last song. The.

[Galia]

But they're like so, like the aesthetic is so. It's like more important than the story in those situations. It feels like, like if I go to a Wes Anderson movie, I feel like it doesn't matter what the story is. It's really about like the.

[Harley]

Oh, I, I could back. You want to take about that? David. David scared me for a second. Like he was gonna go burn down the Magic Castle. But I actually, I have a lot of friends that go see Wes Anderson movies right away and I'm like, I'm good. It's the most.

[Galia]

They're fun.

[Harley]

I find his movies for me are the most like two years later, oh, I haven't seen this yet. Awesome. And put it on. But all my friends, like, they like, it's an event. They like. As if it's like, you know that 8 year old with a Marvel movie, they're like, we got to go. I got us tickets. We got to go.

[Galia]

Yeah.

[David]

I agree with Wes Anderson not being like waiting for his movie, but he's like the perfect. There is a perfect time in your year where you sit down on the couch and you're like, which movie should I watch? And that right spot, he comes in and he brings you all that delight and wonderful imagery of his style that you enjoy.

[Galia]

Yeah. I'm not hating him at all. Like, I have seen multiple movies of his in theaters. Darjeeling Limited is one of my favorite movies.

[Harley]

Yeah. You know, it's actually the one before that, the short that played before that.

[Galia]

Yeah.

[Harley]

With Natalie Portman. What was it? Yeah, what's it called? I forget. And that one's. It's a short one. It has a good ending to it.

[Kate]

Real quick, shout out to Tiffany 2 trill with another banger quote from a movie Kate hasn't seen. School of Rock. Would you tell Picasso to sell his guitars? Shout out.

[Galia]

Yeah, I just for me, like, I don't know. Is it. Is it? No, I'm not gonna say it. It feels almost like. Is it a crutch at some point to have that established an aesthetic where you don't try other things, where you don't branch out and do new stuff. Like, I feel like if I've seen one Tarantino movie, I know what the music is going to sound like. I know there's going to be gore. I know that there's going to be, like, it's going to feel like a Western, right? Like, I know exactly what I'm getting. And it's fun, but I don't know, it feels, it feels a little stagnant. Stagnant to me, it's giving.

[Harley]

All of these things are the people that you naturally just don't with or like. These are the things that they like. We're starting to paint a little picture here of the things you don't like. And I'm not gonna lie, it's starting to look like a B.

[Galia]

What is that?

[Harley]

You don't like Scarlet? You don't like Scarface, I bet.

[Galia]

I, I mean, it was okay. I don't think it's, like, the best movie in the world. I'm a Godfather fan of the two. I feel like those are the two big, like, boy movies that people had on their walls in college.

[Harley]

When you're in college, you got, you got 300. They're like, dude, you see 300 after?

[Galia]

Wasn't it. What year was 300?

[Harley]

2006.

[Galia]

Was it? It was Scarface. All the boys had Scarface posters on their walls when I was in college.

[Kate]

I think they were quoting 300, but they weren't.

[Galia]

Yeah, this is Sparta was just, like, everywhere. Yeah. I mean, wait. Yeah, go ahead, David.

[Kate]

I want to expand on your take because a lot of people were saying this about Christopher Nolan, too, when the Odyssey came out. They're like, oh, he makes the same movie every single time. I don't think that's true.

[Galia]

I don't think that's true at all for him.

[Kate]

I think directors do have, you know, tropes and stuff that they like to go back to and a certain style that they like. Sorry.

[Ethan]

Bye.

[David]

Bye.

[Galia]

His chair literally spun. Maybe there's something with his dogs. Hope his dogs are okay.

[Kate]

The most Scooby Doo ass exitle.

[Galia]

He left his hat behind. Spinning.

[Ethan]

Yeah.

[Galia]

Anyway, continue again.

[Kate]

I,

[David]

oh, my God, I can hear the dogs.

[Galia]

Do you hear him barking?

[David]

Yeah.

[Galia]

Maybe someone's at the door and they're going nuts. Oh, yeah, that's Chihuahuas, baby. Okay, continue. What were you saying, anyway?

[Kate]

I was saying, like, I, I, I like stylistic things like that. I like because I mean, again, Wes Anderson. Yes. He likes making things like super symmetrical and colorful and specific.

[Galia]

Like.

[Kate]

Yes, but I don't think that means every single movie is exactly the same. Like, Moonrise Kingdom is Nothing like Fantastic Mr. Fox or Grand Budapest Hotel. Like, they all are still very, very different movies. Yet maybe the. Stylistically they look the same or could be like in the same universe because they're all, like, vibrant and. And symmetrical and stuff like that. But again, I still prefer a director having the same style but making an original thing over the dozens of, you know, slop movies of rebooting the same thing three times and superhero movies. I'm over superhero movies basically, almost completely. Like, I'll watch, like, the big ones. Like, I'll watch Spider Man. I'll watch whatever the Doomsday or whatever. Or like, like the. The Robert Pattinson Batman. Because it's different. It's not. It's not the 90% CGI slop. Like, no style, no nothing. All written by millennials trying to make Gen Z happy. Like, I. I'm over all that bullshit.

[Galia]

Yeah.

[Kate]

And I'd rather. I'd rather watch a director I like that has. That may have the same style than the same. That has no life or creativity to it at all. And they're just trying. It's just a cash grab.

[Galia]

Isn't. There's another Eggers movie coming out soon, right? It's like Werewolf or some. I'm definitely gonna see that.

[Harley]

I could have been dead.

[Galia]

Wait. Yeah, your dog.

[Harley]

I could have been dead. I could have been dead.

[Galia]

What happened? Do you want to tell us?

[Harley]

Yeah. I could have been dead. And no one gave a.

[David]

Sorry.

[Galia]

I'm so sorry. What happened?

[Harley]

Who cares?

[Galia]

I care.

[Ethan]

Who cares?

[Harley]

I'm dead. Who cares?

[Galia]

What happened to you?

[David]

Who.

[Harley]

Who cares, dude? I'm dead.

[Ethan]

Who cares? I'm dead.

[Galia]

What were we supposed to do?

[Harley]

I don't know.

[Galia]

I don't know where. I don't know your address. I just know. $des armo. That's all I know.

[David]

Harley, you sound just like your dogs whenever you're, like, barking at the camera.

[Ethan]

Hello?

[Harley]

I'm on the show. Everyone hears you. What are you saying? I'm on the show. Oh, show. I'm on my show. Well, it's not my show.

[Galia]

Hello?

[Harley]

Yeah, I. I gotta go. Everyone can hear you. Don't say anything.

[Ethan]

Hello?

[David]

Me?

[Harley]

Oh, did I.

[David]

Yes.

[Harley]

No one cares about me.

[Galia]

That's why I answered the phone. Tell your mom to tell us about.

[Kate]

I could have been.

[Harley]

I could have been dead.

[Galia]

Tell your mom to Tell us about.

[Harley]

Everyone wants to know. Everyone wants to know why you got banned from Facebook. And I won't tell them. I'm not. Okay, I'm hanging up before you tell them. Okay. I love you.

[Ethan]

Bye.

[Galia]

Damn it. Someone said. Someone said it insists upon itself. Kate. Probably kind of a little bit. A little bit? What did he say that about? He's like, don't care for. What was that about on f. On Family Guy when he was like, it insists upon itself.

[Kate]

Oh, yeah.

[Galia]

The. The Eggers movie is. Werewolf movie. I can't wait to see that. I loved Nosferatu. The. The.

[David]

It's probably gonna maybe look kind of the same. You know what I'm suggesting?

[Galia]

Yes, it will. They're all in black and white. It's all the same aesthetic.

[Kate]

Well, don't watch it. It's the same thing. Don't watch it. Who cares?

[Galia]

Oh, my God, you're so.

[Kate]

Go watch fast and furious 14.

[David]

I have an idea for a segment with Kate.

[Galia]

What?

[David]

Kate watch Medium Women hurt her ten favorite men.

[Galia]

My ten favorite men.

[David]

Yeah. Your top ten men. And why do you like them?

[Kate]

I know. Who's number one.

[Harley]

Harley.

[Galia]

They have to be famous, Harley.

[David]

Super famous.

[Galia]

That's true. You are.

[Harley]

I told him at Jamal,

[David]

you come

[Harley]

to Salmo BC and know my name.

[Galia]

Dude, I'm gonna. I'm gonna add that to Monday.

[Kate]

To be fair, Harley kind of looks like the gigantic version of Peter Dinklage.

[Harley]

I'm big. That's what they call me. Big Dinklage. They call me Big Dink when I'm all up in the stink.

[Galia]

Kate's favorite man. Perfect.

[Harley]

Head over to Peking, put on my. My blades, you catch me at the ring.

[Galia]

Peter Dinklish.

[Harley]

Who watch Deep Cut. Who remembers the racism from last episode? Who remembers the racism?

[Kate]

Yeah, I do.

[David]

Which one?

[Harley]

Good.

[Galia]

Yeah, which one? Gaia says narrow it down.

[Kate]

Pov. This is Kate. This is Kate doing the segment of the ten Best Men.

[Galia]

Yeah, I'll have a puke bucket next to me. It'll be great. It'll be.

[David]

And rate them so, like, from 10 to 1.

[Galia]

Rank them 10 to 1.

[David]

Yeah. Yeah. I need to see men in the universe.

[Harley]

You gotta love Jake Gyllenhaal, though.

[Galia]

Why do I have to love Jake Gyllenhaal?

[David]

Why?

[Galia]

This is the thing, though.

[Kate]

Are we talking about actually right now?

[David]

I just don't.

[Galia]

Just men accept.

[Harley]

Oh, just men.

[Galia]

What the patriarchy says are the men that I need to enjoy.

[David]

Carly, if we needed to rank 10 actors, I don't think Kate has that many that she likes.

[Galia]

No, I don't.

[David]

No, it's just 10 men from. Honestly, it would be like billion people.

[Galia]

Chris Farley. It'd be like all the funny guys from the 90s.

[Harley]

All the dead ones.

[Galia]

All the dead ones. They're all dead. And that's why I like them.

[Kate]

They did what I wanted and then they're gone.

[Galia]

Exactly, exactly. They made me laugh and then they died.

[Harley]

One time I was on.

[Galia]

Hang on. Golly. Did you say my number one man is Hitler?

[David]

Yeah, obviously. Holy. Like, I haven't seen your rating, so I don't know. Like, I could have only assumed that the number one would have been having.

[Harley]

Having Hitler as your number one guy is really, really bad for sure. But Hitler having you as his number one guy, that's bad news.

[Galia]

It's bad. That's real bad. All right, I will do. I will do it. But I. Okay. Lesbians in chat. You understand?

[Harley]

Shambhala.

[Galia]

I find myself resistant to anyone that, like society at large tells me I am just supposed to embrace and love. Just like.

[Harley]

Oh, so you let them control you through the opposite. Yeah, because then. Then you do it. So you, like, you're like, I'm gonna hate Robert Patterson just because you told me to love Robert Patterson. But now the patriarchy is. They're controlling you, but you're doing it the other way.

[Galia]

Just skeptical in a way. Maybe a lot of people aren't, I guess. I don't know. Just because I'm outside of whatever the fuck it is.

[Kate]

So I'm going to be honest. Like, I'll. I'll say a hot take here. The way you, I think, feel about Tom Holland, or maybe don't say that

[Harley]

racist thing you told me in the group chat the other day. No, no, no, don't say that. Okay.

[Galia]

He's very racist against white people. What were you saying, David? The hot take.

[Kate]

I. I'm not the biggest fan of Timothee Chalamet.

[Galia]

Yeah, I can see.

[Harley]

See you're stupid piece of.

[Galia]

Well, thank you for your truth, David.

[Harley]

When the castle burns, I hope you're in it.

[David]

And David, frankly, I agree. Like, Tom was here and Timothy is like safe space.

[Harley]

That sounds like some Zendaya tells Tom after a huge day of doing three with Timothy.

[Kate]

Like, I. I'll say, I. He was. He was a very good actor and call me by your name. I loved it. Ever since then, I feel like he's just being himself.

[Harley]

You're all about that gay. Hey, David, you like that gay.

[Kate]

I don't mind it.

[Galia]

I think when you do so many movies. And I think that that's another problem is like when one actor or actress is just like rammed down our throats. I think it's hard for me to think that they are like organically good. And also I think it's hard for them to like have range in their roles because they're exhausted. Right. I think you're just

[Kate]

not Robbie.

[Harley]

Not Jake Gyllenhaal. Not Jake Egg. He's one of the best take. Gyllenhaal is number one.

[David]

He might be number one out there in the chat. Saying to the girl who's a fan of Taylor Swift that the Jake Gyllenhaal guy should be in her top 10 is diabolical.

[Kate]

I was just about to say.

[Harley]

I was just.

[David]

You don't know the lore.

[Harley]

You still, you still caught up about the beanie and the scarf things.

[Kate]

Like 17 or whatever it was.

[Galia]

Yuck.

[David]

Wait, do you have 10 minutes to talk?

[Harley]

Wait, yeah, of course, dude, because I

[David]

have a 10 minute song.

[Harley]

No.

[Galia]

Yeah, right.

[Harley]

Wait, but I know that that's, that's in the video. That's where the guy's wearing, wearing the stuff. But, but wait, he was, he was 40 and she was 12.

[David]

No. Yeah, she was nine.

[Kate]

Exactly.

[David]

She was nine. She was sitting right by. By me in the Spider Room movie and she was crying.

[Harley]

Wait, how old, how old, how old was he? She. They, when they did it.

[Kate]

And Jake gyllenhaal was the 80 year old guys.

[David]

He was super into his late 30s and she was like 19.

[Galia]

Yeah, she was like.

[David]

Yeah.

[Galia]

Very young adult though. She was an adult, but it was just a large age group.

[Harley]

That's crazy. Yeah. His acting sucks now because of that. Now his acting sucks now.

[Galia]

It does.

[Harley]

Now it does.

[Galia]

I liked him in Bubble Boy.

[Ethan]

I. I know.

[Harley]

You gotta see Nightcrawler.

[Kate]

I know. In fact, you've never seen Nightcrawler.

[Harley]

He's like, he's like an ambulance chasing, paparazzi type guy. He does this. He just does it. It's so crazy. Nightcrawler, he's also in a Spider Man.

[David]

You Google like straight man movies and like Nightcrawler is number one.

[Harley]

Is it. It's one of. Has it become one of those amongst like, what are other straight men movies? Like 300 Scarface.

[David]

Yeah, but like 300. More of a depad. Yeah. You would assume that like men would love like Troy or 300, but night roller is like a unique.

[Galia]

Do you guys want me to. Do you guys want me to do my favorite men or specifically My favorite male.

[Harley]

No, we want you to do coke in an rv.

[Galia]

Men in general. Okay. Men in general. Okay. Deal. Harley.

[David]

And for Timothy, have you guys seen the. A Complete Unknown? The Bob Dylan movie?

[Harley]

No, I know I didn't see it and I wanted to.

[David]

I actually, I. I did see it in the theater.

[Harley]

Okay. Like, it looks bad. Do you not even watch a trailer? Don't even lie to us.

[Kate]

She's like, why would I watch a trailer?

[Galia]

I'm so. I'm. I am experiencing chalamet exhaustion.

[Kate]

See, I know. I'm. I agree.

[Galia]

Because watch him in this. Watch him in this. Now he's Bob Dylan. Now he's a Candyman. Like, I just.

[David]

But he was pretty good as Bob Dylan. That I was about to say. He was a. Like, his acting was really good. I think he was aiming for like a Academy Award there, but just he

[Kate]

ruined it with him.

[Galia]

And then when you can.

[Harley]

What about the table tennis movie? That's supposed to be good.

[Kate]

Yeah, but he's just playing himself.

[Harley]

What about the table tennis movie? Marty Supreme?

[Galia]

That's supposed to be movies about anything these days.

[David]

Marty Supreme.

[Kate]

Kate's never heard of any of them.

[David]

With this was its advertising that just like I wouldn't watch.

[Galia]

It was like overhyped. Yeah, I. I saw it everywhere.

[Kate]

J Rod donated to Kate. What movies have you seen?

[Harley]

Lol. Little Women, the remake of Little Women.

[Galia]

A lot of female driven movies that are not considered superior by the status quo. I would say, like.

[Harley]

So you saw Hurt Locker?

[Galia]

No.

[Harley]

What.

[David]

But can you name like three movies?

[Galia]

It's hard for me to remember movies. I have terrible short term memory loss. If you say a movie, I will

[David]

know if I've seen it or not.

[Galia]

Let me go.

[David]

So far. So far we've been saying like 20 movies and you haven't seen it. Yeah.

[Kate]

And you're like. And you're like, I haven't seen it and I hate it.

[Harley]

Did you see the Lego Movie?

[Ethan]

No.

[Galia]

Does it look like I would see a level Lego Movie?

[Ethan]

So crazy.

[Harley]

You see. Have you seen Lego Batman?

[Galia]

Wait, I've already started.

[Harley]

So best Batman movie. Best Batman movie.

[Galia]

I've already started. Apparently a doc called boy movies with movies you guys yell at me to see.

[Kate]

Kate's the person to watch a movie. Like, she's like, started a bunch of movies and never finished them.

[Galia]

No, that's not true. I love movies, but just like a very specific few of them, I guess. Hang on, let me. I. I've seen Dune. I need to cross that off. I've seen Dune.1 and Dune 2.

[Harley]

By the way, that's your movie quota for the next five years, so.

[Galia]

Yeah, it's perfect.

[Harley]

Take time off.

[Galia]

I. I re. Watch. That's really what I do. And I like going to the movies. I just don't remember what I've seen.

[David]

Did you read books?

[Galia]

I do read Fight Club. Yes.

[Harley]

Did you read.

[Kate]

What'd you think of it?

[Galia]

I didn't read Fight Club. I read Invisible Monsters.

[Harley]

Would that be a sick movie or what?

[Galia]

Yeah.

[Harley]

I keep. I keep hoping they do it. They can make it a show. I don't know what they're waiting for. It's the craziest story.

[Galia]

Nobody knows that book.

[Harley]

Yeah. I love it. I. When I read that book, I ended up reading all of his books.

[Galia]

Yeah.

[Harley]

And by the end of it, I was like, oh, my God, how much sex and so depressed are we gonna have in all these books?

[Galia]

Yeah, no, Invisible Monsters is great. I loved. I loved Fight Club. I thought that was great. Yeah, Fight Club was very good.

[Ethan]

Yeah.

[Galia]

I loved Helena Bottom Carter.

[Kate]

Big question. Have you seen Shinobi?

[Galia]

Yes. Yes.

[Harley]

Don't lie.

[Galia]

I watched that in a.

[Harley]

Don't lie. I don't. Ethan's not watching. You got the job already. You don't need to do the whole thing.

[Galia]

You haven't seen it.

[David]

No, I haven't. I honestly don't want to watch it.

[Harley]

It's hard to be like, hey, you want to watch a four. You want to watch a four hour black and white movie that's to. Going to make you feel like after.

[Galia]

Right?

[David]

Exactly. Yeah. That's. That's why I don't want to watch it. Yeah. Sorry.

[Galia]

Yeah. Doesn't. Doesn't feel.

[Harley]

That's me with the boy in the striped pajamas and Marley and me.

[Galia]

Yeah.

[Harley]

And we bought a zoo. All that.

[Galia]

All right.

[Harley]

I'm like, don't show me an animal and kill it.

[Galia]

Let me see. I. I did start making a list of my favorites because I literally cannot remember the movies I've seen Lord of the Rings.

[Kate]

Oh, make a letterbox question, Kate. What are your thoughts on Scarlett Johansson?

[Galia]

I don't have thoughts on her.

[David]

Have you seen movies with her?

[Galia]

I saw. I feel like she was in a bunch of. In like the late.

[Kate]

You see Mary 2000s.

[Galia]

I can't sit there and watch Adam Driver scream at her. Oh, so no.

[Kate]

Right. Do you see Jojo Rabbit? Really fucking good movie.

[Galia]

Yeah.

[David]

Lucy, have you seen.

[Galia]

No, I don't have. I don't have an opinion on Scarlett. I haven't seen enough of her, I guess. I don't even remember seeing her as, like, a lead in anything named a bunch.

[David]

Okay.

[Galia]

Yeah, I haven't. Yes, yes, I saw that. And I liked her voice in that. I thought she did a good job.

[Harley]

Yeah, I'm sure you did.

[Galia]

Okay, these are the movies that I put as my recent favorites. The favorite, Midsommar. Get Out. Women Talking, Love, Lies Bleeding, Portrait of a Lady.

[Harley]

Women Talking. White People Are Scary. All Women. Like, I see the theme going on here.

[Galia]

What's the theme?

[David]

What is the theme that you can read? That's the theme

[Galia]

I can read. Oh, my God.

[David]

Should we.

[Galia]

Should we stop talking about movies and stop talking about.

[Kate]

Let's keep going other stuff.

[Harley]

Should we take poppers and get gaped?

[Galia]

Yeah.

[Kate]

Again.

[Harley]

Did you bring your bag?

[Galia]

Hell, yeah.

[Harley]

Crack it open.

[Galia]

Get that backpack going.

[Harley]

Crack that bag open. Shotgun first on the ultra blow.

[Kate]

Shotgun.

[Harley]

That means you're.

[Kate]

You're. You're doing it to someone.

[Harley]

Shotgun first and I'll shotgun last.

[Galia]

Last. It's a rotten egg.

[Harley]

First pumps and last licks on.

[Galia]

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh. And then some other French movies. Okay, let's do the. Hey, I just Venmo'd you for rent.

[Ethan]

Nice. Now I can instantly spend it whether I'm checking out online with Venmo or using a Venmo debit card.

[Galia]

Say more.

[Ethan]

More. Exactly. Because the more you do with Venmo, the more you get, like, earning up to 5% cash back with Venmo stash on a bundle of brands.

[Galia]

So order more pizza.

[Ethan]

The meth demands it.

[Galia]

Get the Venmo debit card.

[Ethan]

Venmo stash bundle. Terms and exclusions apply. See terms at venmo me dashterm venmo checkout not available at all merchants. Venmo MasterCard is issued by the Bancorp Bank.

[Galia]

Na actual segment, which is looking at your dating profiles.

[Kate]

More things that I put in the doc that just gets skipped over, bro.

[Galia]

I want to get to the actual meat of things I didn't expect to be berated for. My movie takes for an hour.

[Harley]

We didn't expect you to be such a goofball.

[Galia]

I am. I am. I totally am. Okay, let's. Let me pull some of these up here. Oh, yeah. There's a bunch of other little that I wanted to do, too, but that's.

[Harley]

I won't call any. I won't say anyone looks like a hooker.

[Galia]

Was there. Was there a fear that you would.

[Harley]

No, I said someone was. They took too many pictures in the hotel room. I said. So it gives. Hooker.

[Galia]

Oh, right.

[David]

Whoopsie.

[Galia]

Okay. All right, the first one here, I started with the ones that people actually like, left some information about why they wanted help. So this guy says, first of all, I know my profile sucks. I'll pull it up so you guys can actually see it while we talk. I am not really a social media type of person and have very few pictures of myself. This, plus my lack of self esteem means I didn't really try. I stopped using dating apps more than two years ago, but in the time I did, excluding the vast majority of scam bots, I received less than 10 matches and never exchanged more than a few words with anyone. So there. They haven't been on apps for two years. I need more. More than a little help. But if a little roasting is what I need to get my shit together, bring it on gently, please, family. Okay, so it sounds like they didn't really try to begin with.

[Harley]

So what is that? What app is this that we. Look. Is this Tinder?

[David]

I think so.

[Galia]

Girl, I haven't been on a nap in so long. Okay, verified. Whatever that means. All right, so this is your Instagram. This is Lorenzo. I love that name.

[Harley]

Yeah, we've got a problem here, though.

[Kate]

W name.

[Galia]

What is it?

[Harley]

The black T shirt under the white dress shirt is just like, can't do.

[Galia]

I was like, oh, is he a doctor?

[Harley]

Yeah, he's in the lab.

[David]

I was thinking the same, that he's a doctor. I was like, oh, that's a. Like a good thing to bring up on in your first picture. But then I was like, is he.

[Galia]

But he's not.

[Harley]

Okay. Yeah. Now, when you. When you are a man and you put your interest as podcasts, no one knows you mean H3. And unless they're in age 3, they know it's a good thing, and they. They consider it a good thing. But if you're a man, you're like, I like podcasts. There's no good podcast for men out there. So it's a red flag. You are actually an instant swipe away.

[Galia]

Well, is that. But is he. He's not saying. He makes a podcast, which I think is more of a red flag.

[Harley]

Yes.

[Galia]

Right.

[Harley]

Yeah. Yeah, but he should just don't say podcast for.

[Galia]

Just say YouTube.

[Harley]

Never say podcast.

[David]

Yeah, just.

[Galia]

So cut podcast.

[Harley]

And I'm gonna say anime is a valuable. A valuable

[David]

thing.

[Harley]

Interest. I think a lot of women like anime, and it could definitely make for a good conversation. However, no one's. No woman has ever been like, God, I gotta find me an anime fan.

[Galia]

Maybe some have there's that.

[Harley]

You know. Exactly. They're one of the few groups where you know exactly where to find them. They wear it on their shoulder.

[Galia]

Yeah.

[Kate]

The E girls and the eye ladies.

[Galia]

Yeah. Hi, ladies.

[Kate]

Notes.

[David]

And David literally disappeared because he was so afraid. He's like, I'm gonna say that and I'm gonna go deuces.

[Galia]

I feel like when I see anime it. There are a lot of connotations that I get. Right.

[Harley]

Oh, the real baby wakes his cartoons from Japan.

[Galia]

It's like, you know, like the kind of the discord mod thing. I just feel like there's. There's a vibe. But you shouldn't. I mean, if that's who you are, like, then definitely put it so someone who also enjoys anime and it's like a huge part of your life.

[David]

Yeah. It depends on how much time of your real life it takes up. Like if anime is like a huge chunk of your real life and your day to day, then yeah, sure, bring it here. But if you just enjoy anime and it's not like a. The biggest interests that are like the biggest part of your life and you bring it here, then it kind of like over states the obvious.

[Kate]

Yeah. Also the first three being just like consuming media stuff. Like I would maybe break that up.

[Galia]

All of them are. Except for board games. Board games, really cool.

[Harley]

It's huge. Means you can work with as a team. You can.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Harley]

You have a competitive edge. You can play games. You understand rules. Board games. Like one of the best things I think you could put in there.

[Galia]

I think that's really, really good. It means you go out probably too, like, and play board games with people. Right. Like maybe you have friends.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Galia]

I think it implies like a social aspect that is not really clear with these four.

[David]

Yeah. Like knows three people. We know that Lorenzo knows at least three people.

[Galia]

Yeah. That he could play with.

[David]

Yeah.

[Galia]

Definitely need better lighting. And definitely this. Yeah. This looks like a. You're like a resident that got his headshot done. But I'm guessing you're not. I don't know if you're a doctor or not. If that's not a lab coat, you need another outfit. Oh, wow. Actually, what are we doing?

[David]

But under all of our like criterias that we usually go through, employed wasn't one of them so far. We still don't know.

[Galia]

We still.

[Harley]

I was gonna say about the anime. Unless you're making money from anime somehow. Don't you just. Just happen. If she happens to like anime and you. She asks you about like, what's Your favorite Zanpakuto. And you bust that out, then that's big to have that in your back pocket.

[Galia]

Yeah.

[David]

It's like. It's like imagine Ethan Klein making a dating profile and he puts, like, anime in his profile. He does watch anime and he does enjoy it. But, like, would it correlate with his personality on the profile?

[Galia]

It doesn't dictate the personality because this is quick hits. This is what people are just scrolling, right very quickly. Works out sometimes. Non smoker. Open to exploring. Master's degree. We love that time.

[Harley]

What is open to exploring mean?

[Galia]

I think that's like, what their relationship, what they're looking for, right?

[David]

Yeah. From what I got from all of our commenters, which thank you. Because all of us are not going on dating apps. This is like what you almost, like, have to put now with, like, your options and, like, open to express. Exploring is basically. I'm up to anything.

[Harley]

Everything's a discussion, I guess.

[David]

Yeah.

[Kate]

I will say I don't what's going on here. Like, this photo. But it's not your fault. It's the fact that, like, someone used flash on you at 11:00am yeah,

[Harley]

his tie is his fault.

[Galia]

Oh, yeah. Yeah.

[David]

This is just Anderson fen right here. Not symmetrical.

[Galia]

Not symmetrical.

[Harley]

But I'm also curious. Like, they got. You got a silly fun hat on. You do not look like you're having a silly fun time.

[Galia]

Yeah, you don't.

[Harley]

So even when. When the silly gets going, you're not about it at all. It's like, damn, how silly is this hat? Have to be to get a little sm.

[Galia]

Yeah, there's like a. There's like a. There's like a dissonance here between. And if it's. My first thought is this is a church thing. I don't know if that's true.

[David]

So my. Feels like you're at church as someone who was doing folk dancing for a long time. This is like me at eighth grade.

[Galia]

Okay.

[David]

Photo before recital. Like, this is a completely serious face. So I don't know. It's like giving off so many different vibes for no reason. We should just deleted that.

[Galia]

Confusing vibes. Confusing vibes for sure.

[Harley]

Why are you trying to confuse us with your vibes, dude? You're trying to trick us.

[Galia]

This picture needs to be eliminated.

[David]

Yeah.

[Galia]

This is very grainy. You look like you just woke up.

[Kate]

This feels like this is a wider photo and you, like, it was a candid of you and you, like, zoomed in on yourself, I think.

[Galia]

Yes.

[Kate]

I think that's kind of what it feels like that's you.

[Harley]

Are you on the veg? Are you on the edge of the fisheye there? Lorenzo, what's going on here? You're on the edge of it, right?

[Galia]

Get in there.

[Harley]

Get in the middle, dude.

[Galia]

Get in there, brother.

[Harley]

Get in the mix.

[Galia]

Yeah, you definitely need some new photos. We do have production specialists here, so there's a job. We love a job.

[David]

I don't know what that means.

[Galia]

Me neither. Maybe clear up what kind of job you have.

[Harley]

Honestly. Sounds like type of label someone at age three would have. I'm pretty sure we have, like, nine

[David]

production specialists, and all of them.

[Galia]

Are you one of the best for YouTube.

[Harley]

They all work for David.

[Galia]

They all work for David. This is a nice photo of you with, like.

[Kate]

Actually, yeah, this is a good photo. This is a good photo. No homo.

[Harley]

No homo. Good lips. Good lips.

[Galia]

Nice.

[Harley]

Let's get some teeth. Good hairline also. So the teeth.

[Galia]

You haven't seen teeth. That's right.

[Harley]

Yeah. Remember, in my rule, even if it's bad teeth, it's good. I think. I think. I think women are more accepting of bad teeth than guys are. I find guys would get caught up on something like that. I also do think that the bar for men is just so low that it's like, I don't give a if he's missing this front teeth.

[Galia]

Is he nice to me?

[Harley]

He's got a. He's got a job in a car. And he seems nice.

[David]

Production specialist. Okay.

[Galia]

Whatever that is. Yeah. I think this should be the COVID I'd be like, oh, he seems nice. He goes outside that.

[Harley]

And then I guess we got to do the white shirt. And I think we. We cut everything else and leave those two.

[Galia]

I think we cut. I think we cut, cut, cut.

[Ethan]

Get a new.

[Galia]

Get a new picture.

[David]

We cut all of them.

[Galia]

You don't like this picture?

[Harley]

It's tough to cut all of them because I don't know what he's got there. Some guys just, like, do not take pictures of themselves.

[David]

Yeah, but you can do that. You have arms and hands, and you can take a photo of yourself. It's not like, limited.

[Galia]

Get over the shame. You're on the site, you know, like, lean in.

[David]

Yeah. Don't have a quota. Quota. When you have, like, one photo per year that you have to wait another year to take the next photo. You're like, okay, guessing.

[Harley]

You know what? Literally, you guys are gonna hate this, but it's the way it works these days. Take that first picture and take the green thing on your head. Picture Give them to AI. Say, do not change anything on me at all. Make my black T shirt white. And on this one, take that thing off my head. Straighten up my tie. Clean my room.

[David]

Did you see I sent the link that Tinder was trying to AI filter the photos automatically?

[Galia]

Really?

[Harley]

So that it knows your photo's AI?

[David]

No, no. It would, like. It would add makeup to your photo. It would, like, make you Uncanny.

[Galia]

What the.

[Ethan]

Are they.

[Harley]

Are they at the place where they're the. It's doing the conversation for you because years ago it had, like, suggestions. It was like, here's a great opening sentence and it would give you something to say.

[Galia]

I had. I. It's in the docs, it's in the. The chat somewhere. This girl figured out after three days that the situationship she was texting with the guy had just outsourced it to AI. She had been talking to AI for three days.

[Harley]

You in the group chat with me,

[Galia]

like, what the. Why are you doing that?

[Harley]

Because it's funny and technology's awesome, dude.

[David]

Cuz he's a psychopath. It's. It's simple. I was gonna say selfie. People are saying, like, take a selfie. Take a selfie. Please don't take a selfie. Selfies are kind of weird. I do take selfies, but all of them are weird when I look back at them.

[Harley]

You're married. You're allowed to do weird shit now.

[David]

But I was doing that before as well.

[Harley]

You're fucking up.

[David]

And I was doing like, this thing as well because I can see this. I can see my own mistakes. It's not like I'm judging anyone. No, I was cutting a part of my face because, like, it was making me more likable looking, in my opinion. Because, like, so in a lot of photos, a part of my face was missing because, like, I don't know, I

[Galia]

look so much better with half of a face.

[David]

Exactly. So I can see this here. So that's why I'm telling you, don't do this.

[Galia]

Don't you fall big head and do it.

[David]

So I got to say, I know that we're talking about AI, but there is much more modern technology, which is called a timer on your phone to time your photos. So you can just place your phone and you can like, step back and take a photo of you standing as well.

[Galia]

Well, yeah.

[David]

And awesome experience.

[Galia]

I think that that gets at, like, the heart of it, in my opinion. It's based on what he told us, that he has a problem with self esteem. Like, he doesn't want to do that. Right. It's like a very public thing to show the vulnerability of. I'm taking these pictures to put them on a dating site. Right. And I think there's like, there's like a cringe curve you have to get over in order to do this stuff.

[Harley]

I love surfing that curve.

[Galia]

You know what I mean? So I think you need to.

[Harley]

Is he trying to match men or women, by the way?

[Galia]

I don't know. I don't actually know. Does it say. It doesn't say.

[David]

Honestly, probably women. Because sometimes there's like.

[Harley]

No, because the way the tie looks. I know. I was thinking the same.

[Galia]

Does this guy look gay?

[Harley]

No. Gay man's taking a picture of the side of the side like that.

[David]

I was gonna say, because there's, like, no effort put into the profile. I feel like.

[Galia]

Well, and that's. I. There's. There is a lyric that helped me get over the cringe and also like, the. The, like the very scary vulnerability of this photograph. Yeah, that's it. No, it's. If you're ever going to find a four leaf clover, you got to get a little dirt on your hands. And if you want to find a head that fits your shoulder, you're going to have to go to the dance

[Harley]

like you're fucking Dixie Chicks, baby.

[Galia]

Casey Musgraves close. So you're going to, like. If you actually want close a partner, you're going to have to do stuff that is messy in order for it to happen. You're going to have to take risks. And, like, the first little risk here is making an effort on your profile. Like, if you don't, being too cool is not gonna work.

[Kate]

And if this is an effort, that's okay. I think it's just.

[Galia]

He said it wasn't.

[Harley]

Oh.

[Kate]

Oh, he said it wasn't. Okay, Never mind.

[Galia]

Yeah, he said, like, he's like, yeah, put in the effort. Just do it. Just do it. Get some nice pictures. Honestly, just.

[Harley]

We're in the 30s now. We gotta make big moves, dude. Find your shortest friends. Take pictures with them. Have a AI. Straighten your tie and clean your room. Like, you got to make moves right now. We are in for the next month.

[Kate]

Just be like, hey to your friends. Like, hey, can you just, like, take candid pictures of me? Can we take pictures together? Like, so it doesn't feel like I'm going to do a photo shoot for my d. Yeah.

[Harley]

And everyone's group of guy friends will be like, sure, bud. Stand right over there.

[Ethan]

Wow.

[Harley]

The lighting's great. It's not a picture of my own face or something right now that I'm taking like, you get. Yeah, you got it. You. Galia is right. You do this on your own. Set the camera up, put the timer on.

[Galia]

But also then you get. Then you get pics with your friends. Is that not a thing that people enjoy?

[David]

Not boys. It kind of like is weird because you need to find the man on the photo. On the dating profile, it's a whole.

[Harley]

And then, then they're going to judge your. Your. Your friends too.

[David]

And okay, they're short and ugly.

[Galia]

Well, I. I just meant not like on the dating. I just meant like to have for yourself. Like, you'll get to have pictures with your friends if you're just like out taking pictures and doing stuff.

[Harley]

Okay. I say cut out podcast, cut out anime, cut out YouTube too.

[David]

Cut out films as well.

[Galia]

Just go board games.

[Harley]

Because then it sounds like he only likes board game. Put board games and like walking or something. Yeah, we will be walking.

[Galia]

Like, what are we doing here? You're out, like, exploring something, right? Like, what was this? Travel, maybe board games and travel. Like.

[Harley]

And I see you got three other story posts. Oh, no, that's the. That's the.

[David]

No, that's the whole thing.

[Galia]

This was, I think, the. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[David]

Also, Harley, you asked about how tall he is. We don't know that. That information is really important. From my estimation, from what I can see, I think he's about 6ft tall.

[Harley]

So looking at the skull, he is 6ft tall or he is.

[Galia]

Yeah, he's got a big head. He looks tall.

[David]

Maybe like six one. That's like what I would estimate. But you should put your.

[Harley]

Your height, put in your bio. Say I'm six foot one, tons of fun, and I dress to a T. Ignore the black T shirt on the white.

[Galia]

I was in the lab.

[Harley]

It's actually. I was in the lab. I was in the lab. It's a lab coat.

[Galia]

I just love that. Oh, my God. Okay, well, that. I mean, those are the. The main. No, our opinions are our advice for you. I mean, just try harder.

[David]

I'm not over. There is no caption, no info, no jokes, no text, Just like.

[Galia]

Yeah, where. Who are you? This is just pictures. You gotta.

[Harley]

I think that's.

[Kate]

I think that's less him and this. And it's more whatever this dating process format.

[Galia]

Okay. Okay.

[Harley]

Say I'm tall and I'm nice.

[Kate]

Don't.

[Harley]

Even if you're not tall, Even if you're like five' five, you're like I'm tall and I'm nice.

[Galia]

I'm tall and I'm nice and I'm

[David]

nice and I have a job. Ice. And a lot of people.

[Galia]

Ice. Yeah. People are saying, by the way, Lorenzo, that you're very handsome. So get out there and if. If this is what you want, don't half ass it.

[Harley]

And if you got a gun, take a picture with a gun.

[Galia]

Or a fish. Girls don't love that, but men like

[Harley]

their fish that they caught.

[David]

Also looking at your photos don't have as that beard, I think you can. You can make it work. Like, I think you could go full.

[Harley]

AI, shave me.

[Galia]

Go clean shaven. Or like grow it in and make it look like.

[David]

I would say grow it in.

[Galia]

Yeah.

[David]

Beard. Beards are the makeup for men.

[Galia]

Beards are cool again.

[Harley]

Yeah, they're the makeup mustaches. We got little tricks. We got tricks. David has no tricks.

[Kate]

Not those tricks. I have magic tricks.

[David]

Yeah.

[Harley]

That's why David learned how to shuffle.

[Galia]

That's what David had to learn how to do some cool.

[Kate]

Learn how to trim your beard or you learn how to shuffle.

[Galia]

There are two paths. A road diverged in the wood. Okay, well, there you go, Lorenzo. Good luck. I think there's a lot of low hanging fruit for you to pick up on. Okay, so next up is Kelly. I don't. Again, I don't know what app this is. Kelly said that's Hinge. This is.

[Harley]

It looked like that when I was. Look how much more effort they make you put in.

[Galia]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. So Kelly says, I spent almost 13 years hung up on one relationship that turned into a five year situationship. That's a lot. And now I'm 34 and have been struggling with dating for the past few years. I get plenty of matches on dating apps, but almost none lead anywhere because people don't read profiles, want different things, or put in zero effort. Lorenzo, I'd love for you to roast me, critique my dating profile, help me pick better photos and tell me honestly if the problem is my profile, my approach, or if dating in your 30s really is just this rough. Well, first off, like, everything you said, that's like exhausting about it is just how it is. You're gonna get matches, and there are. Most of them are just gonna lead nowhere.

[Kate]

Like, you're not gonna.

[Galia]

Yeah, they could be AI, you're not gonna like a bunch of people. A bunch of people aren't gonna like you. I think that's just par for the course, right from what I remember. Go ahead, go ahead.

[Kate]

David, no, no, you first.

[David]

Please.

[Galia]

No, please.

[David]

No, no, go ahead, David. I'm gonna tell completely another thing. Go ahead.

[Kate]

No, I. I mind. It doesn't matter.

[Galia]

You got it.

[Kate]

You got it.

[David]

Oh, my God. He's just, like, jumping in and, like, jumping out of it. Okay. I was gonna say that from. From what I can remember.

[Kate]

So what I was saying was

[Galia]

it

[David]

can be, like, the amount of men who would text you as their first message. Your place or my place. Or, like, really, are you down to. Or like, can we just. Yeah, like, the amount of those first messages you receive are diabolically high. And you're just like, oh, I just thought you were, like, kind of cute. And then, like, you would scroll photos, like, not saying, like. Like typical photos. Like, five photos, like we seen with Lorenzo. And then by the time you got to the first message, they're like, do you want to see my. And I'm like, jesus. I'm like, yeah, that's the first message, buddy. I don't know if I want to see your. A lot of times it would drive me nuts to the point where, like, the person would. They would just, like, copy and paste the same message to, like, hundred girls and see what's going. So I would say, like, yeah, give me your address. Sure, buddy. Okay. Yeah. 10pm Go wait outside. 10pm Sounds good. Sounds nice. Here's my phone number.

[Galia]

Just, like, sending us some weird. Some neighborhood.

[David]

I'm like, yeah, here you go.

[Galia]

No, it's there. It's definitely weird.

[David]

Dating part of it.

[Galia]

Anytime I do think as you get older and, like, you're more sentient and your brain is more formed, it just seems more insane, right? Because you really do just have to do the same thing over and over again and hope that you are in the right place at the right time, and that person that is right for you is in the right place at the right time. Like, it's gonna make you feel insane. So you take a break, you delete the app, you cry about it. That's definitely what I did. And then you go back on and you have some dates, and someone breaks your heart. Like, it's just. That's what that is. That. That is the grind. And I think maybe accepting that makes it a little bit easier. So this is the first picture. This is Kelly. I can't see you.

[David]

You're like the. You're, like, engraved with the texture of it. You're, like, becoming the same wall. You're like a chameleon character just hiding too wide.

[Kate]

And then also just the lighting Makes you blend in with everything. Like, it. It's just not a good first photo. I get, like, showing off, like, where you are, and that's fun and, like, that's part of your personality. But as your first photo, this is

[David]

not also a full body picture and a good one. So I understand why you picked it, but also, like, we can probably do something else.

[Kate]

Yeah, it could still be used. Just not your first photo.

[David]

Yeah.

[Galia]

Yes. Yeah, yeah. It's good to show that you, like, have friends and stuff. I really like this. Oh, okay. Harley, please. You don't think it is. Or you.

[Harley]

No, I do. I think for. I think I'm not surprised. She gets lots of matches.

[David]

Yeah, I think. I think the same. Like, I can see this photo working. It's definitely a beautiful photo, but we can do better.

[Harley]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Galia]

Put it in the mix. Put it in.

[Harley]

What's up? What's up with this?

[Galia]

With what?

[Harley]

Kelly's an idea guy, so she's creative.

[Galia]

Oh, yeah. I'm pulling that one up. I like this that they have. It says. I guess you get your friends to, like, fill it out.

[Harley]

Who's your friend? AI.

[Galia]

From people close to Kelly. This is from her bestie, Kelly. Yeah, this is, like, literally, like, references. Kelly is an idea guy, so she has a creative and usually hilarious solution to all sorts of problems or scenarios, be they real or outrageously fictional. Okay. She sounds like she's got a lot of energy. We like that. A dream home. Must include an art studio. A giant. Whoa. A giant bathtub. Same girl. Convenient electrical outlet placement. So important. So important. I like these. I think you sound witty to me. Yeah, I would. I would click on this girl for sure.

[Harley]

We have a problem, though, is that she's not aligned with the people she's matching with.

[David]

Yeah.

[Galia]

Okay.

[Harley]

So she's putting something out and getting something back that doesn't align with what she wants.

[David]

But that's also. That's just like a. Guys, a lot of times don't look at your profiles at all. They just match with everyone. And then by the time they just look at their matches, like, who's.

[Galia]

What's it. Coming back around to it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, this is from her niece. That's really cute. I remember a moment when Kelly surprised me for Christmas by hiding in a giant box. That's very cute. I don't. Is she looking for men? Women. Let me see.

[Harley]

She was in a relationship for a long time.

[Galia]

Yeah. Did she say with whom?

[David]

I think it was a man.

[Galia]

What's a. She didn't say. She doesn't say to me. I'm like, this is a. This is a good lesbian profile or vice profile.

[Harley]

That's what for. For a hey mama, though. Like a hey mama's pulling up. Well, yeah, I'm sure every hey mama is hitting this up like it's put out a bad signal.

[David]

Straight. She's straight. It says on the bottom.

[Galia]

Oh, no. Well, pink oh, six. Pink Pony Pub. Not Pink Pony Club. I'm like, already, like, lesbian when I see that because of the chapel roan.

[Harley]

Lesbian alert.

[Galia]

Lesbian alert. Okay, this year I really want to stop and answering these dumb prompts on dating apps.

[David]

Well, you think. You think you're funny when you're doing that, but you're actually canceling out any conversation starters in that point. Was that, like, it is funny and it is witty, but it doesn't give any info whatsoever besides that everyone else

[Kate]

hates the same because then the guy matching be like, I hate it too. Let's just get down to business. Want to see my.

[Galia]

Yeah, maybe more honest about what you want to do this year?

[David]

Yeah. David, that sentence was too constructive for a first message from a guy.

[Kate]

Yeah, I also shouldn't have said that. That's probably going to be too many syllables. Want my question mark?

[Galia]

Oh, lead cook. See, I'm just sitting here, like, try girls. You'll get. You'll get dates with girls. Because, I mean, this is. I mean, she seems like she has her shit together. She seems bright and funny. I think she definitely needs a different picture. Do we have any more pictures in here? I'm just scrolling. Guys, quickly. This is really. This is a nice one. Choose a time for our first date. Oh, okay. She wants them to do that. This is my submission to National Geographic. She goes out, she's active. This is a cute one with big foot.

[Kate]

I will say a lot of full body photos.

[Galia]

Yeah, I recently discovered that I may be.

[Kate]

That could be some closer photos. Okay, here we go.

[Galia]

Oh, you want. You want face photos?

[Kate]

This. Okay, here we go.

[Galia]

She's very active. She goes out a lot. I like those sunglasses. Girly. She likes corn. Let's see what else we have her saying she might be good at archery. I mean, I've never tried it for real, but my niece's plastic bow and arrow and plastic toy can of beans positioned on the top of her closet door. Hates to see me coming. Bullseye every time. I think she's really funny.

[Harley]

Yeah, I think it's a good profile. I think it's just. Don't. Don't give Up. There's so many shit people out there.

[Galia]

Yeah.

[Harley]

So it's not easy. No one likes dating, I feel like.

[David]

Yeah, I think literally no notes for me as well. I feel like you are channeling this monogamy, long relationship energy here. It's giving like you mentioned your niece and other like family oriented. It's like, yeah, you're gonna meet my family and we're gonna build our family as well. So it gives like this, it gives the right signals to the guys and I feel like all the photos, everything is great. You just gotta be like more if a guy sucks in their message, just, just don't answer, don't care, don't think about it, just move on.

[Harley]

And I think this might be a good first picture by the way.

[Galia]

Yes, I love this picture. And, and like Galia, you were saying the guys are self selecting out. They are doing you a favor if they're like matching with you and then just not talking to you because you clearly have your shit together, you know what you want, you're adventurous and interesting and so if all they have is like liking you and then just like wanting to hook up then them and just wait for like a. Have fun while waiting for something real because you're not, you're not turning anyone away. In my, in my brain with this

[David]

profile, don't wait for the guys to message you. Message the guys. Be the funny one to message them first. That will like usually if a girl messages someone first it will definitely change the dynamic of conversation a lot because other either way it's going to be. Hi.

[Galia]

Hi.

[David]

How are you? Good, and you?

[Galia]

Yeah, good.

[David]

How was your day? Do you want to see my like that's, that's, that's.

[Galia]

Anyway, here's my immediately. And, and also I think taking the first step might also self select out more guys that are like, oh, she's too aggressive. You know, like you need a, you need someone that's as self assured as you are. And so yeah, just keep, keep going. Maybe put this picture first instead of the one that's all washed out so people can actually see you. But yeah, there's just a lot of people that you're not gonna match with. That is just the nature of it unfortunately. But also you don't want to be for everyone. You want to be for like one or a couple people. Right. So you'll find them. Don't worry, they're coming. Okay, next up, this person said she said she. Her pronouns that she is a little bit spicy and that she's been banned From Tinder, I believe, for her spiciness. Okay, this is Ariel. Her pictures. I mean, she's, like, a little bit revealing in some of them, but to me, it's not that bad.

[Harley]

Yeah, yeah, Just send the link. We know why you got banned.

[Galia]

All right, so this is Arielle little selfie here. Then she does two truths and a lie. My first tattoo was when I was 16. I smoke weed every day. I'm a gold star lesbian. I will tell you right off the bat, there's a red flag here. Hey, I just Venmoed you for rent.

[Ethan]

Nice. Now I can instantly spend it whether I'm checking out online with Venmo or using a Venmo debit card.

[Galia]

Say more.

[Ethan]

More. Exactly. Because the more you do with Venmo, the more you get, like, earning up to 5% cash back with Venmo stash on a bundle of brands.

[Galia]

So order more pizza.

[Ethan]

The math demands it.

[Galia]

Get the Venmo debit card.

[Ethan]

Venmo stash bundle terms and exclusions apply. See terms at Venmo Me stash terms. Venmo checkout not available at all merchants. Venmo MasterCard is issued by the Bancorp

[Galia]

Bank NA and it's saying that you're a gold star lesbian, even if that's

[Harley]

one of the lies and saying that you smoke weed every day.

[Galia]

Also, that tattoo at 16, they're also a little bit. But specifically the gold star lesbian one. You're gonna turn off a lot of people. A gold star lesbian means you've never had sex with a man. And people are very, very sensitive about that because some people has had sex with a man without wanting to.

[David]

That's what that means.

[Galia]

Yeah, it's like a very, like, old school. Like, you wear it as a badge of honor if you never had a dick in you and so makes bisexual pansexual people feel bad. It makes people who were assaulted feel bad. And so you might be eliminating people you haven't even met or haven't even, like, given you a chance. So don't use that. You can believe it inside and wear it as a. A badge of honor for yourself, but you're going to be turning people away without even knowing it. I think it's not a good moment.

[Harley]

This might be a lie, though.

[Galia]

It could be. But still, like, just using that as, like, a descriptor.

[Harley]

Oh, it's not a word. It's not a term that anyone uses. Because it's like you are less than gold star.

[Galia]

Yes. Yeah. Like you're tarnished if you're because of.

[Harley]

Because someone like me was there.

[Galia]

Exactly.

[Harley]

Now I'm offended too.

[Galia]

You ruined it. You ruined it.

[Harley]

So I'm still swiping. Right. But I'm gonna talk to her first, make sure she knows that first message is, I'm going to be talking about that.

[Kate]

I'm not sending any pictures until we talk about this.

[Galia]

I bet you're so stupid. Yeah. So I don't. I don't love this. And I guess you guys have issues also with these. Definitely this. We've talked about the weed thing before because when you put this out when people are just scrolling, they might not even notice what the prompt is. They just see these three potential red flags, right?

[David]

Yeah.

[Galia]

So might not be the best prompt to fill out.

[Harley]

Unless you're hitting them with they're all

[Galia]

a lie or they're all really like,

[Harley]

great, they're all a lie. That's the thing about me is I like breaking the rules. You know, I've been banned here before. This is my third account.

[Galia]

I'm a banovator. I'm looking for. I'd like to find a partner slash best friend that I can hang out with, grow with, and learn from. That's nice. It's very clear about what you want. Right? Oh, and she said dead ass. I want to find my eventual wife.

[David]

That's a really good copy. Like deadass. I really want to find partner. Like I. I actually want to find a normal partner.

[Galia]

I love that. And also, while that might be a scary thing for men, women are not scared by that. Like, we want to know what the other person wants. Generally you.

[Harley]

What about it? If you found out she was banned on Tinder.

[Galia]

If she's just banned on Tinder for like sexy photos, then who cares? She hasn't banned for like being a racist.

[David]

She's.

[Galia]

I think she's.

[Harley]

No, but is she the one sending the cockpits?

[Galia]

She's sending the cockpicks. Like, this was like the most revealing picture she did, which is like her butt out in the back since her

[Harley]

computer enhanced this image.

[Galia]

Shut up.

[Harley]

Put it in 4K, pull it up on four simultaneous screens.

[Galia]

She knew what she was doing.

[David]

Oh, my God. I did read the Are you a dog person with that costume? And I saw that it's her as Dalmatian or whatever that breed is. And she's like a.

[Galia]

She's like in a dog costume.

[Harley]

Are you a dog person?

[Galia]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, maybe there is a furry component. It's hard to tell. Wearing animal print these days is. Is tricky. Lots of Dogs.

[David]

Are all of those your dogs and a cat?

[Galia]

Yeah. That's a lot of animals.

[Harley]

Yeah, it's giving AI add dogs to my picture.

[Galia]

Shut up.

[David]

But I mean, it could be a red flag for some people. Like if those are not your, if all of those dogs are not your dogs, you shouldn't put like four dogs in a cat.

[Harley]

Yeah, we don't like that Stolen dog valor. We don't support that.

[Galia]

Because if this isn't your, like, you

[Harley]

better get access to those dogs.

[Galia]

If someone's like okay with one dog and one cat, they're gonna see this and be like, oh, not for me. But if you're like, oh, I was just dog sitting.

[Harley]

But she's, she's, she's browsing amongst women, not men. So they're not idiots. So they're gonna, they're gonna understand that she should maybe ask and be like, are all those dogs yours?

[Galia]

Gotcha.

[Harley]

Okay, but this next, this next one might be the biggest red flag. And I only read the first sentence.

[Galia]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Dating me is like, imagine a degenerate 15 year old boy, perverted gamer, probably high Internet ghoul. But I also love deep intellectual conversations. Animal, animals and in general being a good human.

[Harley]

She built for Shambhala.

[Galia]

Yeah, she's probably. If not, you gotta go girl.

[David]

So to me, I can't imagine a degenerate 15 year old boy. Those are so awkward and so hard to talk to.

[Harley]

Yeah, you're also dating. You're also trying to get a lesbian here.

[Galia]

Yeah, I wouldn't invoke, I wouldn't invoke a male in, in that. I mean, you could just say a

[Kate]

minor aspect to it. Yeah.

[Harley]

Also that I'd honestly be like, dating is. Yeah, I'd say dating me is like dating a ghoul. But I also love animals and in general being a good human.

[Galia]

Dating me is like dating a 50 year old boy. I don't have my license. Like, what are we doing?

[David]

It's like, get rid of this. I want to get the, the wife for the rest of my life and I want to build like a really serious relationship. By the way, dating me is like dating degenerate.

[Galia]

Yeah, that doesn't really jive. So our. What the. Are we just trying to be funny?

[David]

Oh, that's a good photo.

[Galia]

Yeah, this is cute. Very cute. A little blurry, but still cute.

[David]

You have a home. That's.

[Galia]

Yep. You seem neat. You seem like you can decorate.

[Harley]

Yeah. Very attractive person putting in incredible amounts of successful work at working against your good looks. Some of the things you said, like, dating me is like, dating.

[Galia]

Why are we doing that? Yeah, why? I'm a male minor, of all of all things as well.

[Harley]

Lesbian. Have you considered a young boy, like.

[Galia]

Like the self. I mean, a lot of lesbians do look like young boys, to be fair, but it's. I don't know.

[Harley]

Jeffrey Epstein, like, be upfront about the ghoul part. I think that's good. Let people know and then say you like animals and you're a good human.

[Galia]

Yeah, just cut it down a little bit. This is her weekend, so she likes going out. I think it is definitely important for people you're dating to know what your expectations are for, like, how much you go out. Oh, here we go. The one thing you should know about me is I am into kink and bdsm, and I have a dom in my life. I'm very perfect, David. I'm very open to talk about all of it. So she already has some kind of

[Harley]

a relationship, and it's a guy.

[Galia]

No, it's not. That's a feminine version.

[Harley]

Okay, good, good.

[Galia]

Thank you. And so there already is some sort of a sexual relationship happening. I think it's. I think it's great to share that up front. Right. You don't want to, like, really like someone, and. And. But you're really monogamous, and then you find this out.

[Harley]

Yeah. Be upfront.

[Kate]

Being like.

[Harley]

And just upfront. So, you know, like, I am typing all of this to you while someone else in my life has me on a leash. Literally, I have a leash.

[David]

Her writing goes, like, from the best writing to the worst writing. Like, it comes in waves. It comes in.

[Galia]

Yeah.

[David]

It's either a really good, like, writing to explain what is going on in your life or, like, the worst kind of way.

[Galia]

Yeah, I'm a degenerate teenage boy.

[David]

Yeah.

[Galia]

Very cute. You look high as in this. Yeah.

[Harley]

You could lead with that picture, though, too.

[Galia]

Yeah, it's cute. Oh, there's thundering out now. Let's see here. This is cute. I like the idea of putting up a Polaroid. I feel like we've seen that before. We saw someone do that.

[Kate]

It was a photo booth.

[Galia]

Photo booth. Right, right, right, right, right. It was. I don't know. I mean, this. I think this is a great profile.

[Harley]

I don't know if I asked this before. Are you allowed to say someone is a hundred footer? You are. Am I?

[David]

What does it mean?

[Galia]

It just means you can tell they're gay from 100ft away. Like, very obviously gay. Yeah. It's not like a. It's not like a. A Slurpee.

[David]

Okay.

[Harley]

She was posted up with that hundred footer in the last picture.

[Galia]

Oh, yeah, someone like that. Sick.

[Harley]

That's why I want to go to Shambhala. I need to see all your exes because I want to take some of them to Shambhala. You'll have an rv, a different rv. And I'm in an RV with like the Duncan gang. And we're like. We're like, we're yelling to your rv. We're like, where are you at?

[David]

Yeah.

[Harley]

Taking your time.

[Galia]

Oh, hell. What's going on? Okay, well, I mean, I. I don't see anything wrong. Where the did it go? There we go. I don't really see anything wrong. Yeah, this looks exactly. You have to reveal on pills. What?

[Harley]

Yeah, yeah, she has to reveal slowly. Her. Her. Her degeneracy. You got a slow leak that.

[Galia]

I mean, she did say she's a degenerate and maybe she. Maybe that is a big piece of her. But I just. The 15 year old boy part, I think perverted does the work. I don't think you need degenerate. 15 year old boy.

[Harley]

Yeah, yeah, I think a lot. That whole upper part is just ghoul.

[Galia]

You're just a ghoul.

[David]

Sweet. Uncool.

[Galia]

Yeah, it's a great word. So, I mean, I don't know, you seem cool. I don't really have a problem with anything that's here. Except for this. This part. If you're looking for a girl or a woman. So, yeah, we'll see you at Shambala next year, I guess. No notes. Not really. All right, this is. What's her name?

[David]

I think I can hear K. Oh,

[Galia]

yeah, I can hear. I'm echoing with somebody. I'm bleeding.

[David]

Oh, this guy. Hello. So.

[Galia]

Nope, there it is.

[Kate]

I think it's. It might be hard. Headphones. No, it's not you.

[Galia]

You Harley.

[Kate]

I sent a message to Harley about an hour ago about it, but it's okay.

[Galia]

Oh, word.

[Harley]

So I gotta buy new headphones.

[Galia]

Ethan. Okay. So this is Summer. Summer says.

[David]

Oh, okay.

[Galia]

Yep, got you. Summer says. I know I am in the Detroit, Michigan area. I get a lot of likes, but not from the type of people I'm interested in.

[Kate]

Shout out.

[Galia]

So this is Shout Out Michigan. This is somebody who's having trouble connecting to the right people. I am bisexual. Shout out. But I don't know if Bumble shows that. Okay, so we've got a bi girly here. Mental health therapist. College right up front we love that.

[David]

I don't really like the point of the year there.

[Galia]

Okay. Say more about that.

[David]

So it's kind of like, it. It brings me to more questions, which maybe is the best part of it. But, like, I was thinking, like, you're 32, but the. The degrees. 20, 22, therefore, when did you go to, like, it? It's just like. Like, I don't know why I'm asking myself these questions, but it's wrestling, like, the wrong way with me.

[Harley]

Yeah. Like, don't be making us do math like that. Don't piss us off.

[Kate]

Holy. I heard that.

[Galia]

Did you hear that?

[Kate]

I heard.

[David]

That wasn't a sound bite.

[Galia]

No, that was thunder and lightning outside of my house. Holy.

[David]

It has been.

[Galia]

It has been so humid here for two days. We're probably gonna get a tornado.

[Harley]

Dude. We should. We should finish this profile and wrap this up.

[Galia]

Yeah.

[Kate]

My.

[Galia]

My power literally might go out. That was crazy.

[Kate]

That sounded like your roof got annihilated.

[Galia]

I really. No, it was. It was literally. I could see. See it might have cracked a tree in my backyard. Honestly, that was crazy. Okay, so here's Summer. Yeah, I have the same. Once you pointed out the date, I wonder, like, okay, what were you doing before going back to school? Right.

[David]

Which is. It's totally fine. It's just not the first question that you would ask a person when you see, like, their profile immediately, like, it's a first date question. Like, just talking about it randomly, but, like, I don't know the point of mentioning it. That's why I was there.

[Galia]

Hang on, Let me see if she has other pictures.

[Harley]

Spoiler alert.

[Kate]

Oh, shout out.

[Galia]

I'm just looking. I like this picture better because you're smiling. Can I just say, like, this picture up front? It gives me the vibe of the girl on Facebook who takes the same selfie in the same angle every time. Might not be you, but that is the vibe that I get.

[Harley]

We could put one. We could put one. I like the teeth one. The one that you pointed out with the teeth and the smile. Yeah, that's like you. You lead with that smile, and then. Then you go to the one that you have. You could put it and. Yeah, and then you could put that. The attitude one.

[Galia]

I love this one. I think it's really sweet.

[Harley]

Your name Summer. You got to be like, my name Summer. But I'll make you spring, Yo.

[Galia]

All right, let's see what she says. There's a lot of information here, which I love.

[Harley]

Turn that off.

[Galia]

And she's bisexual, so I that one girl goes right down my ass crack. Okay, right. That sound bite it go. It's like nails on a chalkboard. Yeah,

[David]

that's a new sound bite. Yeah. Yeah.

[Galia]

So Summer says, hopeless romantic in a hookup world. Fdt. I'm guessing that. Is that Donald Trump?

[David]

I have no idea.

[Harley]

Yeah, probably Donald Trump.

[Galia]

Donald Trump.

[Harley]

Donald Trump.

[Kate]

Donald Trump.

[Galia]

She likes video games, cuddling, thrifting. That's cool. Being creative, watching MMA and boxing, going out and going to live shows. I appreciate authenticity over everything. If it's not meant to be, it's not meant to be. Don't push off the inevitable by being someone you're not. It feels a little.

[Kate]

I think that at the end you don't.

[Galia]

Platitudes. Yeah, cut the platitudes. It just sounds a little cliche.

[David]

It also sounds like a. I know that we do that from time to time here when we say it's like an insecure thing. Whenever you're like, I appreciate. It's basically saying, if it's not meant to be, just tell me. If you don't like me, it's okay. Like you, you can just tell me the truth. That's how it sounds to me. And it sounds a bit insecure.

[Galia]

Insecure, yeah.

[David]

Which it's kind of hard for me to judge a therapist's profile because then

[Galia]

I'm like, true, true. Although some therapists are crazy. I will say also, like, I appreciate authenticity. Maybe this is just because I'm from New England where women are. Are very, you know, like more in your face. But when a woman here says that, it's like, I hate liars. Like, that's the real energy behind that because they've been lied to. Like, there can be like drama wrapped up in that sentence of like, either saying, authenticity is everything. Loyalty is everything. When people say those things, it's a. It's a little bit of an alarm for me. But that might not be true in the Midwest, so she just might be.

[David]

We should just cut that.

[Galia]

Just cut that. Just cut that. So Summer's in chat. Hi, Summer. I love that your hair matches your eyeballs. It reminds me of Clementine's hair in Eternal Sunshine.

[David]

Do you like how my hair matches my eyeballs?

[Harley]

I do.

[Galia]

It's beautiful. Yeah, that's one of my all time faves.

[David]

Same for David, I think.

[Galia]

Yeah, let's all snuggle and watch it together. Okay. So she says she's five, two, works out sometimes, cancer, grad degree, drinks sometimes, doesn't want kids, doesn't have kids. Good to know spiritual, liberal wife. God damn it.

[Harley]

Yeah, when you're proud, you gotta let

[Galia]

him know there's your. There's your problem right there. There. Did. Did AV drop in here because someone said Michigan. Did he. Was he just like, summoned from the earth?

[Kate]

He was awoken.

[Harley]

Wait, what? What?

[Galia]

Apparently he's in chat just as we started talking about.

[Harley]

Someone said Michigan.

[Galia]

Yeah, and girls from Michigan.

[Kate]

Right as he messaged, someone said Michigan. That's when the thunder went off.

[Galia]

Hey, guys, guess what?

[Kate]

What?

[David]

What happened? Oh, my God.

[Kate]

Kate's power went out.

[David]

Oh my God.

[Galia]

She's dead.

[Harley]

Bye, Kate. That's crazy. We're gonna have to continue this. That's nuts. Make me big, David.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Harley]

Hey, guys. You're all so awesome and I wish we could have gotten through all of that, but David's pressing buttons, so Kate has to take his job of doing everything, and she can't do that because. Because her house was struck by lightning and it might be burning right now. So, David, maybe read some Soupies. You know, let's start to. Let's start to put a nice little bow on this one.

[David]

Yeah, we're almost at 6pm so.

[Harley]

Yeah, I'm gonna start screaming at 6pm on thought. I start screaming at you guys and my loved ones and I don't want that to happen. So let's get some. Let's get some Soupies here.

[Kate]

Oh, she said her Internet is rebooting, so she'll be back soon.

[Harley]

We can't. We don't know what's going to happen. So let's just do the Soupies and. And if that happens, that's cool, but at least we'll have some Soupies done.

[Ethan]

So let's.

[Harley]

Let's get. Start putting a bow on this.

[Kate]

Now she's. Now she's telling me to open up the link in the dock.

[Harley]

Don't. She has no power right now.

[Kate]

But we can literally and figuratively has no power.

[David]

We can do some super chats right now.

[Kate]

All right, I'll do some super chats. Yeah.

[Harley]

Yeah, let's put a bow on this one.

[David]

See how you manage people, Harley. That's how you manage people. Know how you do that. It's totally fine.

[Kate]

Morg. Morgzem said. Question for Harley. Can I request hardly Morgzine? Sorry, Can I request a fractal forest name? I'm a homebody and was wondering if they can still be assigned to those that like to chill. I'll make. I'll make it my Discord name.

[Harley]

Oh, well, you mean like a playa name. My name Sponge was from the Playa. I don't think I ever had a Shambhala name. But you could have a fractal name if you want. You want that?

[Kate]

Give it to them. They're asking you, Sahara.

[David]

That's good.

[Kate]

Shout out. And shout out Rainbow for five podcast gift memberships. Thank you. Shout out Straight Kate for donating $50 and said 50 smackaroos for my homies. Peace and love. Peace and love to you too.

[Harley]

Thank you so much. Straight Kate holding it down while. While Gay Kate's goofing off right now.

[Kate]

Shout out Kelly, Yelly, Yelly Kelly for sending five podcast gift memberships. Thank you.

[Harley]

Kelly, Yelly Kelly, Yelly Yelly.

[Kate]

Thunderdomer. Said, I love ab, but as a local who lives in Guayali, the yerba mate mispronunciation was killing me. Wasn't he saying yerba mate?

[Harley]

Yeah, he was saying that and I called the yerba mate the whole time, so I know I did that.

[David]

Oh my God. Yerba mate.

[Kate]

Yerba mate.

[David]

Hi, mate. Hi, Mate.

[Harley]

Ab, you still there? Everyone's laughing at you right now.

[David]

Someone just said Powerly Outenstein.

[Kate]

That's a good one. That's. That's good enough for one of these.

[Harley]

Don't do that. That one goes right down Kate's ass crack. David, stop.

[David]

Oh my God.

[Harley]

Stop doing that to Kate's ass crack. David.

[Kate]

Kendra Garrett. Juan said, hi, family. On days you don't feel like talking or feeling less social, how do you hype yourself up for a show? Love you all so much and appreciate you showing up for us, you just do it.

[Harley]

You just. You sit there and you're like, you're not. What was their name?

[Kate]

Their name was Kendra. Kendra Garrett.

[Harley]

You're like. You're not Kendra Garrett 2. You're Kendra Garrett 1. So let's go out there and handle that business. Little Pip, little pep talk to yourself is good or a bump.

[Kate]

Shout out. Alexa, who said Harley, My boyfriend bailed on me. Bailed on going with me to a wedding. I'm in. Therefore I need you to come be my plus one. Also, I ordered an out of pocket cameo for my friend and she was obsessed, so shout the fuck out, King.

[Harley]

Wait, is that. Is that the one where I asked if the pussy was still juicy?

[Kate]

They didn't specify.

[Harley]

I think so. Where is it? Are you a boy or a girl? Where's the wedding?

[Kate]

The name?

[Harley]

I don't know. Actually, I can't. I can't get time off after all the. After the Shambhala fiasco.

[Kate]

Right.

[Harley]

Ethan's putting me on ice for a bit.

[Kate]

Jasmine Santiago said we need another Ab Boys night maybe.

[David]

True.

[Harley]

Was Nate at the last Boys?

[Kate]

He was not.

[David]

Oh, yeah.

[Harley]

But you can come.

[David]

Are we gonna do one on Wednesday?

[Kate]

Yeah, but you can come.

[David]

I can come?

[Kate]

Yeah, of course you can.

[David]

Okay.

[Harley]

Just wear a baseball cap and say slurs and. And drink beer.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Galia]

Hello.

[David]

I'm back. I didn't drink, so.

[Kate]

Ah, we just wrapped up soupies. I think we're done for the night.

[David]

Okay.

[Harley]

No, let's. Let's finish. Let's finish her profile.

[Galia]

Yeah, of course.

[Harley]

Well, not of course. Dude, I'm ready to bounce right now. Bonus time this bonus time right now.

[Galia]

I genuinely do not know how much longer my power is going to stay on. So let me just finish pulling up Summer's profile and we will close it out with her. And we have a. We still have a bunch left over, so we will definitely do this again. So don't worry about that.

[Kate]

No,

[Galia]

next time you come back, we'll do it. Summer Detroit, Right? Okay, here she is.

[Kate]

I need your screen shares.

[Galia]

Gotcha. Just getting everything ready. It's not even raining. It's just thundering and lightning out. It's very scary and weird, honestly, with

[David]

you saying guess what and then completely going out of power the next.

[Harley]

Yeah, it was perfect timing.

[Kate]

It was like. It was like, guess what?

[Harley]

Yeah. And you froze right away.

[Galia]

Oh, my God. I didn't know. That was like, I think my monitor shut off. And then I was like, guess what? I think that's what it was. Okay, back to Summer. Okay, so we were saying, open up with the smile. Open up with a smile.

[Harley]

We could cut the second half of the bio.

[Galia]

Cut this.

[Harley]

Wait, There was interest there that we saw.

[Galia]

Oh, yes. Okay.

[Harley]

Summer values. Intelligence, crafts, concert. My interests are documentaries and confidence.

[Galia]

Interested. Being confidence is. I don't know what that means.

[Kate]

I think intelligence and confidence needs to be cut.

[Galia]

Yeah, because those aren't your interests.

[Harley]

Yeah, I see Crafts and documentaries.

[Galia]

Crafts, documentaries, concerts.

[Harley]

People are poor these days. You say concerts. That sounds. You're honestly scary. Gold diggers are expensive.

[Galia]

Yeah, it's true.

[Harley]

You know, it's like, it's. You know, everyone likes a concert. We know. What about. What about the free. Ish.

[Galia]

I think. I think. I think if music is a big part of her life, she should leave it. But yeah, intelligence and confidence are just kind of. Whatever.

[David]

Saying right above. I'm looking for confidence, which is weird to begin with because I was gonna say, like, what does it. I'm Looking for confidence and curiosity means if you're already curious, then you're not looking for curious or like already.

[Galia]

Yeah, this is, this is a weird prompt that they give.

[Harley]

I'm looking for confidence and my interests are confidence.

[Galia]

Yeah. So cut that. Cut.

[Harley]

I'd say I'm looking for long term relationship.

[Galia]

And that's it. Yeah, and that's it. And I will say, yeah. Putting that you want confidence in somebody twice makes me think you're not very confident. Right.

[David]

Like I established earlier with her bio, so.

[Galia]

Right, exactly. So let's get some of the self doubt out of here. After work, you can find me cross stitching while watching something like Jeopardy on an edible.

[David]

Good, good description of your night.

[Galia]

Yeah, I love it. I love it.

[Harley]

Does he have a job also?

[Galia]

Yep. You got a job. Causes and communities, feminism, LGBTQ plus rights, reproductive rights. We love that.

[Kate]

Baddie going out only speaks English.

[Galia]

White and English. Yeah. Don't even put that. Don't even put it.

[Harley]

AI, clean my room.

[Galia]

Hey. Yeah.

[Harley]

AI, don't touch me at all. Don't change me. Just clean my room.

[Galia]

Clean up my room. I'm known for being loud, being honest, being sarcastic, and napping. Okay, so she is. Or she says that she is confident and would like somebody else who is confident or maybe being loud doesn't. I don't know.

[Harley]

She's sick of driving the conversation with you.

[Galia]

Yeah, yeah. It feels like you're.

[Kate]

I feel like set up. You can change. It's like I'm interested in someone matching my energy or something like that.

[Galia]

Oh, I like that. I like that. Being interested in something, someone who matches your energy.

[David]

Also, a lot of times being loud and being blunt doesn't necessarily mean that your confidence is high. Which.

[Galia]

Yeah. And again, I will say again, it might just be a New England thing, but when someone's like, I'm just being honest, they're usually like a huge bitch and they're being mean.

[Harley]

No offense.

[Galia]

They use that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Exactly like I was being honest. I'm just being honest.

[David]

Usually being mean to people actually means that your confidence is. Is low.

[Galia]

Yes, yeah, exactly. So. And I'm not saying that you're a mean person, but when I read that you're loud, honest and sarcastic, there are some connotations there for me. So throw a little cheery. If you're a cheery person, let us know that. Or if you're just like really intense all the time, then, I mean, you'll find an intense person. When I unplug, I like to blast my Current music obsession while doing some crafting or puzzling. Love that. Oh, I like that little outfit. I would like to know where you got it. Please, please and thank you. I would wear the out of that again. Clean your up.

[David]

That's the hotel room.

[Galia]

That doesn't sound interesting. So we can have towels on the floor in a hotel room picture.

[David]

Obviously. Yeah.

[Harley]

Hotel room. Hooker alert. Hooker alert. I'm kidding.

[Galia]

Hooker alert.

[David]

I feel like.

[Galia]

Yes.

[David]

I feel like in a hotel room it can be a bit more messy. Which I was gonna say about the previous picture. I think that one is from a hotel room as well. That's why it's so messy. Because there's like a. This plastic bottle. Yeah. I think this is like an Airbnb

[Galia]

or something like that. Yeah, it could be the bottles.

[David]

Yeah. I just. I. I think both of those are not her.

[Galia]

Girl. Where do you. This is where you live?

[David]

Yeah.

[Galia]

Doesn't have a lot of places to take pictures. Maybe get some outside pictures. I know you're an indoor girly. The crafting puzzle for free.

[Harley]

No way. Honey, put those away.

[Galia]

This is nothing.

[Harley]

You save that for later. Can't get the feed for free.

[Galia]

Yeah, put those nuts. Put the piggies.

[Harley]

There's value on that.

[Galia]

Now put them piggies away.

[Harley]

I personally don't care. I'm happy. I'm not into that. And two people that are. That. That's cool. But now there's a dollar value attached. I can't put that there. It's like having your tits out.

[Galia]

Yeah. There's no natural light in most of these photos. Get. Take an outside picture. Maybe that'll. Yeah, this one is. But she's still indoors. Maybe just get out. Get outside for just a hot second.

[Harley]

I think we make those changes in the interest and looking for and in the bio. And I think we have a much better profile. And open with the smiling picture.

[Galia]

Yes. Open with this one, Harley. I can hear myself in your earballs.

[Harley]

And also put the. Get rid of the white and proud. And the. We speak English.

[Galia]

We speak American here. Get rid of these colors. Don't run. So that's summer. Everybody try and take them from my cold dead hams. So that's. That's summer. And that's our dating extravaganza. We still have 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7. Next time. I mean, we can do lightning round.

[David]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, let's do.

[Harley]

And I. Yeah, I have juu. 1992 says no, you can't skip me. I'm a rare mask lesbian in her 30s. Love you family. So you got to get that one.

[Galia]

Which one is that?

[Harley]

A rare mask, 1992.

[Galia]

I hope I saw that. Okay. All right, so how do we want to do this? Just, like, based on the very first slide, we say yes or no or just critique. Critique the first picture.

[Ethan]

Quick.

[Harley]

Quick critiques.

[Galia]

Quick critiques.

[Harley]

Did you find the. Did you find the rare mask lesbian?

[Galia]

Let me see. I don't remember them saying that, but did I see a. I'm just setting

[Harley]

you up to pull up a pick of Lorenzo and be like, here.

[David]

She.

[Galia]

I don't know if I pulled.

[Harley]

You know, I'm just playing. Hello. You know, I'm just playing Lorenzo in the bed.

[Kate]

She said no, she just got here.

[Galia]

Girl.

[David]

Lorenzo, you should do this.

[Galia]

Oh, there. There actually is someone else.

[Kate]

Never mind.

[Galia]

Okay. Rare mask lesbian in her 30s. Is this her?

[Harley]

Bring the rare mask lesbian.

[Galia]

Bring her to. I think I found her. I think I found her. Potentially. Okay, so first up, did someone hit

[Kate]

a 6, 7 chat saying I missed a 6, 7?

[Galia]

I don't know. I don't think I did.

[David]

I don't know.

[Galia]

All right, first up is Amelia. What do we think? I think it's a nice first picture.

[Harley]

Yep. It's not a perfect one. There's no teeth, pretty hair.

[Galia]

Yeah, we need some teeth. You haven't filled out your phone, your profile all the way.

[Harley]

It's also a weird little touch, but I very much like when someone does this picture. If they must take the picture and they look at themselves instead of looking. Instead of the camera, there's just something instead of looking down at their own face. It just gives a level that I with.

[David]

Yeah, such a guy move like there to look down. Like those, like.

[Harley]

Yeah, yeah.

[Galia]

No, I like this. I think you have really pretty eyes. You have really pretty hair. I think this is a good photo. Show us some teeth. And that's. That's our critique.

[Harley]

Next.

[Ethan]

Next.

[Harley]

But we. We get another picture from them. Or is this another person?

[David]

This is a nice photo.

[Galia]

This is bang, bang, bang. This is lightning round.

[Harley]

All right, that's. Every time I open up hinge, I'm bang, bang, bang. Trust me,

[Galia]

I'm gonna.

[Harley]

Why are you doing that?

[Kate]

Feel, Kate.

[Galia]

Right down my ass crack. Okay, this. I don't have this person's name. All we get is this picture and then my date. Ideal date from home is true. Try true crime.

[Harley]

Oh, you like true time. I also like true time. True tribe documentary. I love the true truck documentary.

[David]

Okay,

[Galia]

we need to see your face. We need to see your. Your smile. It's a cute picture.

[Kate]

I like this photo. Just not the first one.

[Harley]

Yes, I like this photo also. I think if I was forced and it was just this only picture, I'd probably roll the dice on it.

[Galia]

Yeah, me too. I like this.

[Harley]

Hoping that it's not like an invisible monster is missing half of the.

[David]

Yeah.

[Galia]

Spoilers. God, that's so funny that you have read that book.

[Harley]

Yeah, it was like, because we're sisters.

[Galia]

One of my favorite. We really are.

[Harley]

Literally.

[Galia]

You, like, said it as I was saying it.

[Kate]

1992 said the.

[Harley]

Shut up, David.

[Kate]

Sorry. Shut up.

[Harley]

When we're bonding like that. I hate our brother. David.

[Galia]

God. What?

[Harley]

David, get back here.

[David]

David.

[Galia]

You're so Amy coded.

[Kate]

The rare mask lesbian is me. My name is Ariel.

[David]

We did Ariel.

[Galia]

No, but she wasn't mask coded. Maybe we have a second Ariel in here. This is the mask lesbian that I thought was talking.

[Harley]

I could see why you would think that she.

[Galia]

Her. They. Them. We've got tattoos. We've got a kind of ironic pose Again, we need teeth.

[Harley]

She got that mustache tattoo on her finger, don't she?

[Kate]

We gotta wait. We gotta read. We gotta read the two truths and a lie because there's a. Look at that. I have a mu. Dang tattoo. If that's true, shout the out.

[Galia]

I own real gold grills. I drive a black Toyota Camry. Two truths and a lie.

[Harley]

I hope you have Subaru. The lies. See, I'm learning, dude.

[Galia]

Nah, she seems like a camera. That's probably the Camry right there.

[Harley]

Oh, Detective. We got you. We got you.

[Galia]

Pack the bag.

[Harley]

Bring it over.

[Galia]

We got you. Pack that backpack. Is this her in chat? Is this her?

[David]

Um, she's not showing her teeth because they're golden.

[Galia]

Oh, they're all grilled out. Yeah. She has to keep us guessing. I think this is fine. She seems like a kind person from this photo.

[Harley]

She's mad.

[Galia]

Seems like she has a job for some reason. This. This shirt feels like it's a job she's giving.

[Harley]

She got off work and she actually has energy to still go do something right now.

[Galia]

What's that like? Yeah, I love it. No, I like. I think this is a great first picture. Wood swipe. Okay. And I hope you do have a mudang tattoo, because that would be really cute.

[Kate]

They said this is. This is Jubu.

[Galia]

Hey.

[David]

Hey.

[Harley]

You were right.

[Galia]

I knew it.

[Harley]

All right, next up, we have tattoos in the grills.

[Galia]

Yeah. Which ones is it? Is that what you said?

[Harley]

That's the ones. The Camry.

[Galia]

Is it the Camry or.

[Kate]

No, they'll donate again.

[Harley]

Yeah, yeah. The Camry is the lie.

[David]

Yeah.

[Galia]

What are the cameras? The lie.

[Kate]

Okay.

[Galia]

All right, all right.

[Harley]

Who's this on that? What are you buying? What are you selling?

[Galia]

Look at that big camera.

[Harley]

Leon. What is Leon Kennedy.

[Galia]

What is that?

[David]

This is giving such we. Weird energy from this photo.

[Harley]

Pull up. Pull up Leon Kennedy. And it hits different. Pull up, Leon.

[Galia]

If we can't see what you're taking a picture of with that giant camera, it feels a little. Yeah.

[David]

From a bit below, like, you know,

[Kate]

you can be zooming into a preschool.

[David]

Oh, my God. Yeah. But also, I can see in the description that that's not Ethan himself. It's his friend who signed him up for this, so.

[Galia]

Oh, that's right.

[David]

I hope that Hank knows about that.

[Galia]

Yeah. Is this the guy? Is this who you're at telling.

[Harley]

Yeah. I was thinking more for Resident Evil 4, where he's, like, about 15 years younger.

[Galia]

Okay.

[Harley]

But that's what he looks like. His hair. But his hair is a lot more like Salon Doubt and Resident Evil Requiem.

[Galia]

Yeah. The person who submitted was a. Is a friend of Ethan. And Ethan has consented to having his photo here. His stuff here. So Ethan. Let's see. Let me. Let me zoom a little bit here using. Okay. So he had.

[Kate]

We can look at a second photo

[Galia]

if we want to, too.

[David]

Yeah.

[Galia]

This should not be your first.

[Harley]

Got a man. Let's. Give us. Give. Give us more, man.

[Galia]

I'll fall for you if you love Nathan Fielder. That's funny.

[Harley]

Yeah.

[Galia]

Skater, die. Is this a video?

[Kate]

It's a video. Okay, never mind.

[Harley]

Leon Kennedy. If he was a gamer and born in Chernobyl

[Galia]

together, we could go to a show. I like this better than the other one.

[Harley]

Shouting at you. Getting used to it. I love yelling at my loved ones.

[Galia]

I love it. It's my favorite thing. I would change loud arguments with my.

[Kate]

I would change the. That we could go to a show slash concert. Because you already said that. I would change that to a different question.

[Galia]

Yeah. What is that the only thing you do probably. Oh, he's only 23.

[David]

Okay. Can you go to. Dating me is like. I really wonder. It's a bit below.

[Galia]

Okay. Dating me is like dating a guy that kind of looks like Germa,

[David]

but it's super cool and chill.

[Harley]

David, help. Who's that music?

[Galia]

The is Jerma. That's. I mean, you're alienating even. Even the Coca Melons. If David.

[Kate]

I typed in Germa and it just autocorrected to Jermaine Jackson.

[Harley]

American live streamer.

[Kate]

I don't think you look like performance

[Harley]

artist and voice actor. He kind of looks like this guy. This kind of look like this German985.

[Galia]

Yeah, he does kind of look like

[Harley]

it does kind of look like that.

[Galia]

Yeah. But like who's gonna know that dating

[David]

me is like dating German But I don't have 1 million followers basically.

[Galia]

Yeah. And I, I just look like him, but nothing else is the same. I don't know. That's not. I feel like that's not an active. An accurate description for you to put here.

[David]

I mean he's 23. It's much.

[Harley]

Yeah, yeah, but we don't want to hear from 23 year olds that they. About the men that men streamers that they watch or like wham.

[Galia]

Having a hard time finding a date. You're 23, you'll be fine. Okay. Man, being 20, early 20s dating is so different. What?

[David]

The last one, I remember looking through these profiles and I saw the last photo. It was like, oh my God.

[Harley]

I know it's the crow. I know this last picture is the crow, but it gives the joker at a glance and the joker is like real. Like poster child for incels. It seems over the.

[Galia]

For like male mental illness.

[Kate]

It's also a video too. And it may be a funny video, but I think just seeing the screenshot, like it comes off like I, it. It's a little school shootery.

[Galia]

Is that.

[Harley]

I know the last, the last one is school. School shootery.

[David]

And the first one is as well. So it's like, let me, let's go

[Harley]

back to the top because I like, I like this first picture. He's like, I like this first picture.

[David]

You like this picture?

[Ethan]

Yeah, I do.

[David]

What did you like here?

[Harley]

Looks like Leon Kennedy.

[Galia]

I think you can cut this one. This one is.

[Harley]

You cut the picture where you look like Leon Kennedy.

[Galia]

This one, he's got his camera but he's like in action.

[Harley]

It's cool. It also looks like he's confident enough to be shouting in groups of people.

[Galia]

This one, I don't know what you're doing. This feels like a hat. Like a photo you took for your photography website, right?

[David]

Like this looks like a yearbook photo for a photo club.

[Harley]

I understand, guys, but like straight up, he's holding like a couple thousand dollars in his hand. I was thinking.

[David]

But he's holding it like it's not his, which I don't like. It's not giving that energy.

[Galia]

Hold it like it's your dick, Ethan.

[David]

Exactly.

[Ethan]

Yeah.

[Harley]

Yeah.

[Kate]

Your first sound bite. That's going to be used for something.

[David]

I'm glad we stayed so late.

[Galia]

It was all worth it. It was all worth it. Oh. Oh, my God. All right, so what are our final hits for this? For this gent?

[David]

It's kind of weird, but there wasn't anything funny there, which I feel is fine, but also like a bit. It gives this creepy energy all over it.

[Ethan]

Let's go.

[Harley]

Let's go slow. Let's go through. Wait, stop and stop.

[Galia]

Wait, wait. But here it was like super cool and chill. Like I feel like there's a little like self deprecation there. Like a little bit of irony, right?

[Harley]

I'd be like, dating me is like dating a super cool and chill guy. Because I am super cool and chill.

[Galia]

Because I am cool. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, what did you want to see in the picks?

[Harley]

Go to the first one. The first. The first one.

[Galia]

This one.

[Harley]

Take your time, you sick pick. Okay, what's. What's under. What's the writing under it? Let's get together for a walk. Museum, live music. Sure, but they think you're a liar. Next.

[Galia]

Wait, why they don't believe.

[Harley]

You're not gonna believe. A man wants to walk to the museum and go to a live show.

[David]

Yep.

[Harley]

Man.

[Kate]

A man with a camera does.

[Harley]

Horny. Dude, he's horny. 23 year old. Straight. Straight men. Oh, he must want to liberal white.

[Galia]

I just want to keep it.

[David]

Keep it.

[Galia]

Keep it inside Someone's daughter.

[Harley]

They'll hold. They'll hold you to it.

[David]

It.

[Galia]

Yeah.

[Harley]

White, Caucasian. We know. You don't need to put it.

[David]

No, no. Yeah, because I think you're like five nine or five.

[Galia]

Not putting your height is weird. Yeah.

[Harley]

So you say 5 11. For sure if you're 5 9.

[David]

No, don't do that.

[Harley]

Everyone else is.

[David]

But then like, I'm. I'm warning you, Ethan. You're gonna walk to your date and there's gonna be a girl like me who's actually 5 11. And you're gonna be amazed. You're gonna be.

[Harley]

Gotta have four say gotcha. No, you gotta have four excellent jokes that are literally just so good that it's like, I'll give this little a shot.

[Galia]

This little king.

[Harley]

Yeah, he came with that. Yeah.

[Galia]

Any other thoughts?

[Harley]

Wait, yeah, go up. The goofy picture. So what is it? It's a pipe. It's like a Gandalf pipe and a lot of skateboards.

[David]

I don't know about this haircut day. It's a good haircut.

[Harley]

It is. It is. It's literally here. It's literally here because he's. He's rocking that Leon Kennedy. But hold on, this one, because I don't know. Go down.

[Galia]

We don't know what this is.

[Harley]

It looks nerdy, as though Lightsabers and Batman. No, you get. You get one, not the. Not both.

[Galia]

Yeah, but we can't. They didn't put it as a video, so we can't watch it.

[Harley]

Tim. Not that pleasant. You said it twice.

[Galia]

Can this band stop haunting us, Harley?

[Harley]

I know. It's crazy.

[Galia]

Hell yeah.

[Harley]

They got. They got. They got like there was some drama at Oceaga festival in Montreal because what people do now, which is so crazy, if someone wants to see. Who was it Tate or someone else, maybe they go to the front of the stage and they won't move. They'll there if they have to because they want to be at the front. I want to be at the front, but they want to be here. Yeah, yeah, I was here. That's what I'm saying. But yeah, so they want to be at the front for their show. Their preferred artist who's at the end. So the other artists that they don't care about leading up to it, they don't want to give up their spots to people who do want to see those artists.

[Galia]

Right.

[Harley]

So the front row consists of people that don't give a. About the music, actually. They're just waiting and they're just filling their pants and they're just waiting to. To. And so they. They just kind of bash the bands leading up to the band that they want to see because they're just there for one person. Yeah.

[Galia]

What does that have to do with Angie? Because people go to see them.

[Harley]

They were. They were like two bands before the headliner or something. So apparently the crowd was just. They just had a bad. For them where it could be cool. Cool video and stuff moment. They just have a bad first three rows.

[Galia]

Oh yeah.

[Harley]

So it makes. Makes it weird.

[Galia]

That's dumb.

[Harley]

Apparently one year during Mumford and Sons, people got there early because they wanted to see Mumford and Sons and they put like their. Their blankets down at the front and wouldn't move for other people that want to see. But then like the act before was Kendrick, I think. Or it was.

[Kate]

It was a show where you heard in Sons.

[Harley]

Yeah.

[Galia]

You just know that concert was this.

[Harley]

This is Oceaga also in 2013 or something.

[Galia]

Okay.

[Harley]

So you just know that like Wild Year people weren't gonna be abiding by the blanket on the floor that.

[Galia]

Yeah. You put down.

[Kate]

Yeah, yeah, that I Can't imagine a festival where after Kendrick you get 90 minutes of.

[Galia]

That's 2013, baby.

[Kate]

Jesus Christ.

[Harley]

You were in grade six, David. But back in 2013, they were. There's some was popping up off was King D. White culture was back for.

[Galia]

There was. There was like a viral video of people running Shrek.

[Harley]

Dude, the white man was on top. David. You should have seen it.

[Galia]

Came back around. It was crazy. All right, what's our final verdict on Ethan here?

[Harley]

Suck him and him.

[Galia]

Okay. Get rid of this picture maybe.

[Harley]

Yeah. It's giving Hobbit the long pipe. It's giving Hobbit. No, that's that real. Dude, they're trying to hold you back. Don't listen to these gay women like Leon Kennedy.

[Galia]

These gay women me.

[Harley]

G. You look so much like Leon Kennedy. These gay women would. Would, Would. Would date you. So trust me.

[Galia]

Keep it. I mean, it is. Okay. Anyway. All right, so those are. That's your feedback. Okay, next.

[David]

If you want to get someone like Harley, then leave that photo.

[Galia]

Yeah, totally.

[David]

Yeah.

[Galia]

The next person calls them thirsting for you.

[Kate]

This guy calls himself thirsting for Ethan's.

[Galia]

There's yours. This guy calls himself his Midwest Casanova. Which is what the. All right, so let's get together. I don't choose a time for our first.

[Harley]

No way, pal. That's your job.

[Galia]

I don't like that. And not because he's a man. I just think it's a weird thing. Yeah.

[Harley]

And I'm saying because it's a man.

[Galia]

Okay.

[Kate]

All right.

[David]

Yeah.

[Harley]

Cut it, dude.

[Galia]

Got you.

[Harley]

You Got you. You. You should actually. At this point, guys, you have to have a lot of legwork done. If you're the dude or if you're the girl who's gonna pack the backpack or however it works. You gotta know. You gotta have places you should know in a couple of questions. A place that they would with for the first one. Or you just choose like a coffee place near you if you're gonna do a quick coffee thing. Because if it was. If, If. If her. If it were a woman I was giving advice to, I'd be like, yeah, just go for coffee during the day. Don't waste your time. Find out if it's good or not. Mm. You don't need to do too much.

[Galia]

Okay. So there's. I guess here you can choose. A first date was another lying man

[Harley]

saying they like live music and walks.

[Galia]

Why is everyone walking all of a sudden? I will tell you. When I was.

[David]

When I was session indicator.

[Galia]

Yeah. When I was dating, it Was all about kayaks. Every lesbian wanted to be kayaking or hiking. And I'm like, just get a life.

[David]

You were dating in a better economy. It's not like that anymore.

[Galia]

Yeah, yeah, they had the. They had the money for that, for excursions.

[David]

That's the Ukrainian date right here. A walk and a cup of coffee. And a cute park. And a cute park.

[Galia]

I love that, though. Pinball's fun. I like pinball. That's interesting. Good hair, cute dog.

[David]

But wait, wait. Choose for a first date. A live music for first date. Why would you go, like, bad first date, Listen to music for your first date?

[Galia]

Yeah, that doesn't seem like a good one to me. I think we can remove that. Pinball or a walk.

[Harley]

And no one's going for a walk with you on the first one, dude. They'd rather a bear than a walk with you. So you gotta be enticed, not wrong.

[Kate]

Yeah, it's like, if music's, like, important to you, it could be like going to a record store or, like, it could be like a walk listening to music together. Because that was like something like Jenny and I did when we first, like, we're getting to know each other was like, sitting in the car and, like, sharing, like, our favorite songs and music videos and stuff like that. That's a good first time.

[Galia]

That's so cute. That's very cute, David. I like this picture. I like this picture better than this picture.

[David]

Also. It's two completely different people, just FYI.

[Galia]

Yeah, who's this?

[David]

First and second are two different people.

[Galia]

Yeah. Like what?

[Harley]

Well, it's just like, we do now know that your pictures are like a year apart. So now they could both be just so out of. Out of date.

[Galia]

These glasses look better on you than these glasses. Just FYI, before we meet, you should listen to the Fetch app by Caroline Carter. I don't know what. I don't know what that is.

[Harley]

A chap.

[Galia]

Is that a song?

[Harley]

Fetch up.

[Kate]

Wow.

[Galia]

Is that an episode? Oh, ep. Oh, well, it's lowercase. People abbreviate episode. The Fetch app. Everyone listen to the Fetch app, whoever the Caroline Carter is.

[Harley]

And also, dude, you're a guy. You don't make these moves. You. You are coming as a thank you for allowing me to spend this time with you. You can't be like, if you want to catch a date with me, there's a couple things that we got to do first. Yeah, it's like, no, bro, you're. You pay to be on this app. I'm a woman. It's free. Like, you have to pay for more swipes. I'm not doing.

[Galia]

Don't tell me what to do. Would be my first.

[David]

Want me to go and find this woman who is an up and coming artist and listen to 20 minutes of her singing in order to be able to talk to you?

[Galia]

Harley, why does your head look so small?

[David]

I was wondering the same thing. Like his shoulders. Can you please.

[Harley]

I think it has to do with me wearing a white shirt and so my shoulders look bigger. Yeah, because it's also a big T shirt.

[Galia]

Oh, yeah, because the seams are like, here.

[Harley]

Yeah.

[Galia]

Okay. Okay.

[Harley]

T shirt.

[Galia]

Yeah. If you were on a dating app, you would. Don't put this picture up. Makes your head look really small.

[Harley]

I'd be like, computer, make my head look better.

[Galia]

Give me a bigger head. Okay, so I. I sense a little pretentiousness here. Are we getting that vibe?

[David]

Okay.

[Galia]

Okay, pull.

[Harley]

Pull that picture up. Who are these clowns we got here? These guys, These other clowns.

[Galia]

Are we doing, like, private karaoke? It looks like. All right, all right. Again, third person. This is a third person. Don't know who that is.

[David]

This is P.A.

[Galia]

stop.

[Harley]

What'd she say?

[Galia]

She said it's Mike from P.A. i don't know.

[David]

It gave me that vibe. I'm sorry.

[Galia]

I see it a little bit.

[David]

It. It's like a blurry photo, like, really far away.

[Harley]

You look so much better than that guy. Dude, I'll tell you right now, you look so much better than that guy.

[Galia]

There's something about.

[Kate]

Do you see him?

[Galia]

Yeah. Turn your head to the side. He just missed the missing hookah. It's a very specific photo. Yeah, yeah.

[David]

It's only. It's only that photo only.

[Galia]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, sure. I bet you can't send me the last meme you saved on your phone.

[Harley]

Enough with the challenges and guidelines here. Oh, no, you got. Oh, you politicking on some. What's the shirt say? What's the shirt say? Who's he? Politics.

[Galia]

It's improv.

[Harley]

So you. We're getting you in the middle of a guy who looks like he's not about to. Yes. And your.

[Galia]

That's true.

[Harley]

Look.

[Galia]

Yeah.

[Harley]

Also, everyone is in the power position. I know you got the seat backwards, but it's not enough.

[Kate]

And an all white man improv group.

[Galia]

Yeah, yeah. Maybe save that one for the second date. Save that reveal. That's a nice picture. Active, loves to ride his bike. It seems.

[Harley]

Best part of the picture.

[Galia]

Yep.

[Harley]

Yeah, but I'm just looking at this and I'm like, what the.

[Galia]

Tell me more.

[Harley]

I see the foot of the bed and I see the mirror. I'm not really vibing with this space between the bedroom. We're in a picture.

[Galia]

Oh, oh, oh, oh.

[Kate]

Okay.

[Harley]

You got a mirror at the bottom of the bed. Would you like watching yourself?

[David]

No.

[Harley]

On some American Psycho.

[David]

It's fine. It's angled. It's like on an angle. It's not.

[Galia]

It's on an angle. It's not facing the bed.

[David]

Also, I do really like this photo. It actually tells much more than we've seen before. You have a house, you have a hobby you can clean. You have lights working.

[Harley]

Yeah, no, the lights. The lights are good. I actually. You know how to shade how bright every room was? Everyone was super bright and I liked it. And yeah, yeah, yeah. The. The bike is good.

[David]

Start with that one. In my opinion.

[Galia]

Interested in a short term relationship? That's always a weird one to me.

[Harley]

Say that it means I'm here to.

[Galia]

I like this photo. But again, we have multiple people. But this guy, he seems cool.

[Harley]

If you are actually open to see where things go, as long as communication and chemistry, I feel like you don't need to say that.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Galia]

That's literally truth.

[Harley]

Yeah. If that is the truth, then you don't need to say short term relationship.

[Galia]

Yeah.

[Harley]

Just say long term relationship. And if it doesn't work out, then it doesn't work out.

[Galia]

Right, right. Because that's. That's how long term relationships happen.

[Kate]

People are just looking for a relationship. Why does it have to be short term?

[Galia]

There's long term, there's. Guys are scared, man. You saw the. The lesbian we had here was like, I'm ready for wife. It is a. It is a dude problem.

[David]

I'm looking for someone to go on a date with. It doesn't mean like.

[Galia]

Yeah, if you're looking for someone to

[David]

date, just go like you're looking for a date. You're not looking for a short term relationship.

[Galia]

Trying to see what I want to call you.

[David]

Put your height. And I just got to say like, last two photos are one person and then everything before that is like giving multiple different.

[Harley]

And I'm big on guys just choosing two photos. We didn't get teeth though.

[Galia]

But I think you cut this photo.

[Kate]

Yeah, I don't. Don't need that one.

[Galia]

You cut this photo. Can't even see like what you look like. This is a great photo.

[Kate]

Yeah, Good photo.

[Harley]

That one in the bottom two work. You could even lead with this one, honestly.

[Galia]

Yeah. I think this is a good one to lead with your hair.

[Kate]

One of the bottom liners.

[Galia]

Cut the. Out of this.

[David]

Yeah.

[Harley]

What, are you lost walking back to your tent?

[David]

And also, yeah, I know that you're wearing teddy fresh, but.

[Galia]

Yes, me too.

[David]

It's a really niche item at this

[Galia]

point, so I like it.

[David]

But shout out.

[Galia]

But shout out. Shout out. All right, so let's do one more. I want to see if there's a. All right, let's do this. Cool cat. This is Daniel, inspiring music artist. I like skate. Skating, I guess. Learning how to play guitar. I be working out. I be getting bread, Taking goth girl applications. Check out my song. Is this. Are you just trying to promote?

[Harley]

Yeah, you got. Got you.

[Galia]

God.

[Harley]

God. I'm Todd Coving

[Galia]

you. We're going back to the lesbian you.

[David]

Let's see. Let's see what happen.

[Harley]

This is what happened with Robert Patterson. A man starts cooking, and you just turn. Want to turn it off?

[David]

Also, he's promoting to us. He's promoting to all the different women around.

[Kate]

He's promoting to goth girls.

[David]

Yeah.

[Galia]

Thick Through Thin music.

[Kate]

Promoting the eye ladies.

[Galia]

Gnarly, okay?

[Harley]

Gnarly. Good Morningstein.

[Galia]

He's 27. Tattoos, YouTube, anime, skateboarding. Content creation. Okay, fine. Cool hair, cool piercings. Still haven't seen teeth yet, right? No teeth.

[David]

No teeth. Get some teeth up front for a goss girl. It's not gonna happen.

[Galia]

Oh, okay. Less smiles, I guess. Into monogamy. Doesn't smoke weed. Interesting. Okay. You don't see that very often, but

[Harley]

he looks like he gets high, right?

[Galia]

This profile, this guy. Where is this taking place? Sort of some sort of an event.

[David]

It's like a trampoline. Please. No.

[Galia]

Is it looks like that or like Go carts.

[Kate]

No, it's go karts. K1.

[Galia]

Oh, go carts. Sick. Okay. Working out. I don't feel like we need that.

[Kate]

I wish I had that new sound bite that.

[Ethan]

Oh.

[Galia]

Oh, God, that thing is so gross. Okay.

[David]

I mean, interesting choice.

[Galia]

I don't feel like we need that unless you show us how much you're lifting.

[David]

He's, like, going for a very specific type of women, which I feel like. Yeah, when you're going for that type, it's like the part where you have to show your veins on your hand and, like, that kind of like on your arm and everything. It's like a whole another thing.

[Galia]

Yeah.

[Harley]

I'll tell you what. He's doing the girl. The girl that he wants or is looking for. She lives in Montreal. And I pulled up his video here and I watched it. It's only like a minute and 2:12 seconds.

[Galia]

Yeah.

[Harley]

And you get a lot. You get a lot more context there. But it's old, so it's not. It's not relevant enough. The. The like. I wonder why it's even there now.

[Galia]

I will tell you. I see this and I'm like, this guy's just gonna want me to watch him skate.

[Harley]

He's gonna be sick, dude.

[Galia]

He's gonna want me to take videos and pictures and I'm gonna spend my weekends either not seeing him or sitting at the skate park. That's my first thought.

[David]

Sometimes women are looking for that.

[Galia]

Some people like it. And if that. He wants someone who enjoys that. I guess it's good to show up front that that's what you're going to be doing.

[Harley]

Yeah. Is. I got this other song here that's newer and it's Crystal Castles cover, which is interesting.

[Galia]

What's up.

[Harley]

Because there was allegations and. Oh, yeah. And that's why she has her own band now, so. But that's deep cut. My. Not everyone might not realize that.

[Galia]

Okay.

[Harley]

But also. And no disrespect to the arcs. I think the music sounds cool, but you only have 47 views, so that's not. That's something like, keep working and let the results be shown later. Being like, hey, check out my song. And then there's like 47 views. It's like, wait, what's your goal here?

[Galia]

Yeah, I'm sure just promoting it.

[Harley]

Feel like maybe you've come across a profile.

[Ethan]

Yeah.

[Harley]

Where. Where girls like, oh, I. I rarely message on here, so follow my Instagram and DM me. And it's like, really? You're just trying to get something else.

[Kate]

Yes, he's trying to get views.

[Galia]

You're filling the funnel. You're. You're funneling, bro. That's content creation.

[Kate]

Creating fomo.

[Harley]

But what a cool. What a cool dude, eh? He's. He's look, he's. He's got the. You don't like the style.

[Galia]

Style spot. It just feels. It feels. Try hard. Are we feeling like he's just like the. Checking off the boxes of the aesthetic a little bit? I don't know. Like. Like the.

[David]

The.

[Galia]

I think it's the working out picture. I'm like, I don't need a picture of you.

[Harley]

I. I question it fitness. I question the validity of this picture. I wonder if this picture was said in jest. Just like the. A lot of the bio was maybe even like, he might even be putting his. His. Like the fact that he's an aspiring musician that doesn't get views is maybe the thing you put forward. I'm sure this guy's closest friends, if they have described him in five words, muscular wouldn't be one of those words ever. So putting that there, I think it also, it's kind of like giving an overall self deprecating aesthetic to the overall profile that I feel like his clothes end up making everything. Like, I feel like I know the guy. Like, I feel like I know him.

[David]

I agree. Like, usually I wouldn't be against a gym photo, but here it kind of works. Also, it's like probably at his home gym, like a garage or something. It doesn't look like a Planet Fitness one.

[Galia]

Yeah, I know.

[Harley]

It's not giving douchey. It's not giving like a douchey gym.

[David]

Yeah, yeah.

[Galia]

I just don't really understand the purpose of it. But it's not.

[Harley]

We could cut it, right? It doesn't need to be there. Let's go back to the top and let's get. Let's go. Start cutting.

[David]

I do have a question.

[Galia]

Yes, job.

[David]

Question mark.

[Galia]

Content creation.

[Kate]

It said he was in trade school right here.

[Galia]

Trade school. Okay, so he's in school and he

[Kate]

didn't mention a job, but he did mention he's getting that bread.

[Galia]

Oh, yeah, he said I'd be getting bread.

[David]

Okay. Yeah, I just wanted to be like, be sure that you mentioned that I

[Galia]

be getting bread, whatever that means.

[Harley]

Cut the song. Cut the song.

[Galia]

Definitely cut the song.

[Harley]

It's your ask asking the person who's on the receiving end of this, this level of profile to be really. It's very easy to take anything here literally.

[David]

The song. The song is for the first date. You go on the first date, you talk about different hobbies and you're just like, oh, and I sing, by the way, can I show you this? And like, yeah, but your phone. And you're like, it only has 440 views. But that's what I like to do. And that's when you do that.

[Galia]

But there's also like all up in here, we have inspiring music artists learning how to play. Like, should we lead with things that we are not good at? Should we lead with things that we. I mean, learn. I mean, maybe one of those, like, I'm learning to play guitar. But then don't. Just don't show me your song. Because now I know you don't know how to play guitar very well. You know, I think it's cool to know that you're learning A new skill.

[Harley]

I didn't hear the guitar in the song though. On two songs.

[Galia]

Don't like push your. Don't like push your art if it's not like ready for that. Like you're saying.

[Harley]

What's the next picture here? What's this?

[Galia]

Wait, do we like this picture?

[Harley]

Not so much. But I like where he is. He wants to. He wants someone that. He says goth girl applications because he wants a girl that will accompany him here. Yeah, goth girls a few crazy like he wants.

[Kate]

He wants the person that's spray painted on the wall behind him.

[Galia]

Right.

[Harley]

Maybe lead then

[Galia]

maybe lead with taking goth girl after.

[Harley]

Too too obsessed. And let's be real, he's down if you're knockoff.

[Galia]

Okay, cool.

[Harley]

What's the next one?

[Galia]

No, here's me learning how to play guitar.

[Harley]

I honestly, I'll tell you something right up. Skateboarding, DJing, playing guitar. Never include the picture. Those are not good guys.

[Galia]

It's very. Yeah, I agree.

[Harley]

I mean this mirror the picture. So you're in the driver's side.

[Kate]

Claude, don't change anything.

[Galia]

Don't change anything about me. Anything.

[Harley]

You don't need AI for that one. Dude, just flip the image.

[Galia]

I love all of his bisexual content creator lighting.

[David]

I kind of like this one. It gives back.

[Kate]

This is a good one.

[Harley]

The rest, I think you could lead with this one.

[Galia]

Yeah, yeah. Give give us a little smile. Oh, class. A driver. He is a driver. So he does. He does work. I don't know. Is it cool to pose at go kart at 27? I don't know.

[Harley]

His father owns this place.

[Galia]

What if he owns this place better with this picture? Is that the kind of driver he is? I don't know what class. All right, so we can cut this one. I think you can cut this one. Cut this one.

[Harley]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, Cut those, cut this, Cut that. Skateboarding can't. Two skateboardings. Dude, you think this is Thrasher magazine? We're trying to get you some booty over here. Out of here.

[Galia]

Yeah, it's very high school.

[Kate]

It's not like I was going to say you only. You only need one skateboarding photo. If that.

[Harley]

But it's like those pictures where it's like multiple pictures doing a trick.

[Galia]

Yeah, yeah.

[Kate]

It's like swipe real fast, shove it,

[Galia]

animate it for yourself.

[Kate]

Jubu donated again and said can we please do a deep dive on them so maybe we can go back and end on their. Their profile.

[Galia]

Okay, let's do that. So I mean you could put that

[Harley]

picture at the End.

[Galia]

Yeah, that's fine.

[Kate]

Lead. Lead with that one.

[Harley]

Get anime out of there.

[Kate]

Lead with the first one. The one below it. That one.

[Galia]

This is a nice picture. This is a nice picture.

[David]

I don't know what's happening here for that. For all the other guys who are watching this. It doesn't mean that you can do this lighting for your photos now, because it can look weird. Unless you're looking for a goth girl and you're like, oh, yeah, you don't

[Harley]

want it to look like a goon room.

[Galia]

Yeah, this is a very specific look. I mean, he looks like a streamer.

[David]

This is like a goon room. And I'm proud of it. Yeah, unless you're not proud of it.

[Galia]

Then it's like, look like ninja.

[Harley]

Look like ninja. If he streamed on kick and was born in Chernobyl.

[Galia]

Yeah, sounds good. All right, let's go.

[Harley]

Let's.

[Galia]

Wait the Jubu. Is she Jewish?

[Harley]

I don't give a. I gotta get out of here. It's Friday. Let me see her.

[Galia]

All right, where the Is she? I gotta go back and find her now.

[Harley]

Wait, how many do we have, by the way? How many we're sitting on?

[Galia]

Well, after this, only a couple. Maybe not even any.

[Harley]

All right, run them. Guys bring. We need more of that.

[David]

No, the applications. I think we had more. It's.

[Galia]

Yeah, okay. Okay, there's more in there. Where the. Is she? Hang on, everybody. We looked at that one. We looked at that one. We looked at that one. Yep, that's him. Ethan. We saw. Hold it. Recently. Sick Ethan. Nice. Here, she.

[Kate]

Oh, that's gonna get a lot of use.

[David]

Can you try that again so I can hear it clearly?

[Galia]

Yeah, hold it like it's your dick, Ethan. Hell. All right, David, you gotta pull me back in.

[Kate]

You gotta zoom in, girl.

[Galia]

And. No, it's doing the thing again. Let me. Let me click to another one.

[Harley]

What's going on here?

[Galia]

Share this one. Share this one.

[Harley]

So this is Jubu.

[Galia]

This is Jubu.

[Harley]

First of all, you're pushy.

[Galia]

And guess what? We love that. We love that. My best blue steel. Nice photo.

[Harley]

What are you looking at, Kate?

[Kate]

I was, like, gonna say, we can't see what you're looking at.

[Galia]

What? It says I'm sharing.

[Kate]

It's super far away.

[Galia]

Yeah, I don't. I don't know why it's doing that. Did that yesterday, too. Let me try to share something else. Okay, Let me try to share something else. This still doing it. It's still being weird.

[David]

Yes.

[Galia]

What the fuck? I don't know why it's doing that.

[Kate]

Whatever you pulled up right now we can't even see on screen.

[Galia]

Okay.

[David]

I had my chat frozen, but the chat message said, call me a duck, but I get that bread, so that's cute.

[Galia]

I like that. I don't know what the problem is. And we don't really have time to.

[Harley]

So that guy was here.

[David]

No, it was just like different people trying to put their something.

[Galia]

It did this last episode too, where it started doing this. Let me try. I'm gonna try to pull it in again. David.

[Harley]

Okay. Because I'm. I'm through with Jubu.

[Galia]

I know.

[Kate]

There we go.

[Galia]

How is it? Okay.

[David]

See?

[Galia]

All right, perfect. Here's Jubu.

[Harley]

Chill.

[Galia]

So we did find out that she has a mu Dang tattoo and grills. Okay. Doesn't drive a camera.

[Harley]

Very symbolic.

[Galia]

Oh, this is the multimedia one. So we actually do have her voice, which I think is very interesting. Oh, voices can really make or break. I feel. All right. Here she is.

[Harley]

By the way, men guys never ever send it.

[Galia]

Why?

[Harley]

Just not gonna. Yeah, it's not gonna secure it like that. A loose. A man saying. Yeah, A man saying one loose sentence is never. He never makes the right choice of what to say.

[Galia]

I will say I've heard a lot of them on Tick Tock.

[Harley]

It's gonna be like. So this is what I sound like.

[Galia]

Oh, yeah. No, don't.

[Harley]

Weird. It's always like that. Or it's like. Or it's like

[Galia]

just ants. Tell a store, answer a question.

[Harley]

No, it's always that. They never. They never.

[Galia]

Yeah, it's not done well.

[Harley]

Or imagine they're like, hey, my name's David. I like magic.

[Kate]

I don't know.

[Harley]

I always feel so weird about these things.

[Ethan]

You can't.

[Harley]

We're never gonna say. There's not one good thing a man could say.

[Galia]

The stakes are definitely higher.

[David]

That's not true. I feel like the voice is one of the major parts of, like, getting to know a person. So, like, hearing a man's voice can be. Can change your decision about a man. That's all I'm saying. So if you have a good voice, if you can do public speaking, if you do, like pitches at work, if it's not like it's gonna be.

[Harley]

So try hard. Imagine he's a public speaker. He's like. So I've been using Hinge now for about a two months, Getting pretty good results.

[Galia]

Listen, it's not for everyone, but it could be.

[Harley]

No one's going to be successful. I'll be sure.

[Galia]

Girls are always like, why is it so sexy? Isn't that, like, a thing?

[Harley]

Yeah, but not a loose sentence. That's when he's like, on. On the. I'm telling you, just a loose sentence. They're gonna it up. It's tough it up.

[Galia]

I think you're right that there's a lot.

[Harley]

And imagine he's got a great voice. Would imagine he's. And even if the voice is perfect, it's like, great voice. He sings. He could be the best singer and sing your favorite song. And he's singing.

[Galia]

No one says sing.

[David]

Let's. Let's. Let's analyze the man from our podcast. For example, if it would be a B, I wouldn't recommend him to do a voice note because he would get too shaky. It would get, like, too nervous. No, no, no, no, no. If it's Zach, he could do it.

[Galia]

Could do it.

[David]

He could.

[Galia]

Dan could do it.

[David]

Dan could do that. Sounds normal. You. You understand the concept should not.

[Kate]

It's Ethan.

[Harley]

It's like. It's like 15 minutes. Absolutely not 15 minutes long.

[Galia]

All right, so here's. Here is Jubu's voice. When I was younger, I went on that ride. The zipper spins you around in those cages. And I was not cage.

[Harley]

Getting finessed right before our eyes

[Galia]

because of the zipper.

[Kate]

It's like, wow, me too.

[Harley]

Yeah, that was easy.

[David]

Eh?

[Galia]

Literally Every kid, literally.

[Kate]

The Lego. The Lego gift where it's like

[David]

this.

[Harley]

Kate just shows. She's like, stop. She's talking. I want to hear her trying to. The zipper.

[Galia]

The zipper. Yeah, I'll show you a zipper. The one that, like, spins you around in those cages. And I was too little. They shouldn't have let me on. I slipped right out of the buck skull thing, and I was tumbling around in the cage, and I hit my

[David]

head a million times, and I stuck

[Galia]

my fingers in the cage to try and make it so I wasn't hitting my head. And so I broke all my fingers and my wrists and. Yeah, it was very traumatizing. Holy. That got dark.

[Harley]

Dude, you got no time for Robert Pattinson, but you got all the time in the world for Ariel.

[Galia]

Yeah, because I'm a lesbian. Because I'm a lesbian.

[Harley]

She's lying, dude. She's lying.

[Galia]

Have.

[Harley]

She's lying, though. How do you not. How do you not see it, dude? This whole story is. Is. Is. Is. Is a lie.

[Galia]

You're such a.

[Harley]

She's just setting up the easy layup right now.

[Galia]

Of I broke all my fingers.

[Harley]

Yeah. What are we talking about? Now, two lesbians. What's two lesbians? What's the conversation about now? Fingers.

[Galia]

Liability.

[Harley]

Where's that going? How. How easy is that? You. Now the whole conversation revolves around fingers. Where are we going? Yeah. So what happened to your fingers? Well, let's just say they're back and better than. Oh, I got them. Don't worry.

[Galia]

No problem now.

[Harley]

Exactly.

[Ethan]

She knows.

[Galia]

You know, you're stupid. I was younger. Is that the end of it? Oh, no, we got more. Okay, we'll get along. God, why does everyone love live music?

[David]

It's a post covet.

[Galia]

Oh, my God. It's just everybody. We get it.

[David]

I hate. I hate live music.

[Galia]

I'm not a huge fan of it either.

[David]

It gives me anxiety. Just going,

[Harley]

what about. What about loud music? It's not live. It's played.

[Galia]

Just like, I like loud music in my car.

[David]

Yeah, see?

[Harley]

Oh, then you'll love loud music.

[Galia]

I just. I just figured out that I have a subwoofer in my car.

[Harley]

That's a game changer.

[Galia]

Eh, it's been fun.

[Harley]

I know you popping that baby blue collar.

[Galia]

I'm rocking. I. I put on a Millie.

[Harley]

If I can do it, homie, it can't be done.

[Galia]

Okay, let's get the out of here. Okay, we'll get along if you love live music, comedy shows, drag shows, and musicals. Nice. You enjoy roasting each other. Or at least roasting me. You are a bottom. Oh, my goodness.

[David]

Right up front.

[Galia]

Just up front with the girls.

[Harley]

Well, isn't that better? I feel like.

[Kate]

Put a picture of the backpack in on your profile.

[David]

Just.

[Galia]

Just drop the backpack if you are H3 family. Oh, that's good. Weed out.

[Harley]

That was the one thing out of this whole profile where I'm like, maybe she's not fully problematic.

[Galia]

What, the bottom part or the H3 family? Yeah, she's super problematic so far. She lies about childhood injuries. What were you saying, Galia?

[David]

Jesse, first of all, shout out for giving your Instagram handle there, which kind of, like, reminds me of. That's a really green flag. You're basically, like, giving your work card so people can check on your whole life and go back and forth and look at you. And I feel like that's one of the most important part we've been missing with all of the other people. Like, those Instagram links are important because you can click. Once you click over, you can see, like, oh, that's a vibe. Okay, I. I get it. I can see this person. I can see everything.

[Kate]

It's also a telltale sign that it's like a real person and not someone fake.

[Harley]

Yeah.

[Galia]

But you don't think that reveals too much up front and kind of gets rid of some of the.

[Harley]

It's such a friction point that they click through. They click through that. Like, it's a big friction point. So they're very interested at this point.

[Galia]

Okay.

[Harley]

You'd have to be.

[Galia]

Yeah, okay, got you. That makes sense. Leaving the platform.

[David]

But even though I am a listener of H3, a part of H3 family. How good? Like, telling that you're obsessed with a certain brand or like, I. I'm. I'm not sure. Like, I enjoy listening to this. To this podcast, but I know, like, I don't know, maybe for some people it could be like, oh, this is like, super obsessed. Like, how obsessed are you?

[Galia]

Okay, yeah, maybe cut that.

[David]

Nothing. Maybe reword that you enjoy.

[Galia]

Yeah, okay. Yeah, take it down. Take it down a notch. Oh, works at an adult store slash

[Harley]

smoke shop that goes crazy. Oh, that's the employee discount. Backpack discount.

[Galia]

I can't even imagine.

[Harley]

She got a backpack and a fanny pack.

[Galia]

God damn.

[Harley]

She got the backpack and the front pack, like, you know, little. That's where she keeps the thump.

[Galia]

And she's got a crossbody. Lesbians love backpacks. Anyway, so cargo pants.

[Kate]

There's a toy in every place.

[Harley]

She's wearing the fishing belt vest.

[Galia]

The fishing vest. Yeah, the fly fishing vest.

[David]

I do have some adult store credits. I used to work as a operational officer for adult store. And then a lot of. A lot of people who work there, they're not owning backpacks. It's like, if it makes sense, if it's like, working in marketing, but you don't have an Instagram page that you're posting it.

[Galia]

But she's a manager, I think, within a store. And also she likes bottoms, so I think she has a backpack.

[David]

Yeah, but she might. She might just have, like, her top three favorite. Yeah, like, super obsessed with a bunch of stuff. Just like, okay.

[Galia]

Full of dildos.

[David]

Yeah, I know that. Just like, this is what I chose. This is my top three. Let's go.

[Galia]

Yeah. That's all you need, monogamy. Okay. I'm looking for someone who is emotionally available with intentions of finding a life partner. If you just want to hook up. Be clear about your intentions, please. That's nice. Very straightforward. See, this is what I mean. Lesbians are very clear with each other, and I like that about us, but

[Harley]

we know that they could lie also.

[Galia]

That's cute. I like the overalls.

[Harley]

Very cool.

[Ethan]

Fit. Very.

[Galia]

It Seems like she sounds like a cool person.

[Harley]

Yeah, she does.

[Galia]

Look at this in the background.

[Harley]

Starting to piss.

[David]

You seem really sweet here.

[Galia]

Yeah. Very sweet.

[Ethan]

Whoa.

[Galia]

I didn't realize she had a big tattoo on the side of her face. Guess where this photo was taken. Is that bubbles? Is that doing bubbles?

[David]

Okay, I don't think anyone would answer that. Just to be sure. Like, if you want some. Something to be a good prompt for people to answer, I. I cannot guess where that is.

[Galia]

Yeah, yeah.

[David]

It's not too absurd to guess. And it's not like too, too. It's too random, right?

[Galia]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like you're doing.

[Harley]

Don't want to be there.

[Galia]

Yeah. It doesn't seem like super active and fun.

[David]

She just said. She just said, I've got lots of toys and backpacks. 13 years worth.

[Galia]

Thank you. She's wearing out that employee dis count. She's got the lubes. I know what she's got. I know what she's got. I think it's good that you show your. I enjoy. There you go.

[Kate]

I hit the wrong one.

[Galia]

Oh, my God. You're gonna do a lot on Wednesday when I do my favorite men. Was that the right one?

[Kate]

That was the one I was trying to hit.

[Galia]

I think it's good to show your face tattoos because not everybody likes face tattoos. One thing you should know about me, I am in Recovery. Congratulations. Great. 4.5. You're sober. If you drink and do occasional substances. I don't mind at all, though.

[David]

Cool.

[Galia]

Great.

[Harley]

In control.

[Galia]

As seen on my mom's fridge. Oh, it's you with your chip. That's really sweet.

[Harley]

Great picture.

[Galia]

Also, also, if you don't want to be around drugs and alcohol, like, you shouldn't have to be. I know people, like, say that to like, be cool.

[Harley]

Tyler. Tyler, our boy that took us there. Yeah, Shambhala. Like he goes to Shambhala. He's like in the middle there. Or that can't clean beats. They're all people that just wouldn't do anything like that. And they're just there because. I don't know, I guess it's like a level of control. Right? But yeah, also, of course, you've got. Everyone has to know their boundaries, right?

[Galia]

With.

[Harley]

With environments that they expose themselves to. But look, she knows what she's doing

[Kate]

and she knows to bring it full circle. Tom Holland is a recovering alcoholic and he created a non alcoholic.

[Galia]

Oh my God Drink company. Suck his dick, David.

[David]

Which spoiler, you can see in his Focus jingle. It's literally like A product placed in one frame, like right his ears right there. I'm like, oh Jesus. Like, what is this? Like, okay, I get it.

[Galia]

I want someone who won't try to make me feel ashamed about my tattoos or job. It's good. You show your full self, right? Tell everyone who you are and then the people will opt out. Please don't hide me from meeting your friends and family. That's so sad. Sounds like that's happened to her before. Yeah, why would you. Why would you not like someone that manages an adult store?

[Harley]

Well, you, you do. It's just that like your goofy parents don't maybe.

[Galia]

I guess. All right, my life behind the scenes just. I mean that doesn't tell us anything, right?

[Harley]

I think it just gives you. No, it tells you. It just tells you to do that. Just hinge some.

[Galia]

Oh, I see. I see me in the wild.

[David]

It gives idea that you're just normal.

[Galia]

Yeah, gotcha, gotcha. Okay. Me in the wild doing some stuff in your cool vans. I can't believe your name is actually Jupiter on here.

[David]

Okay.

[Galia]

I mean this is a nice profile. Yeah, you seem very self assured. You know what you want. You've got your together. You seem like you're gonna find someone. Yeah, this one sucks.

[David]

I feel like you're missing a call to action. Like I feel like all of this is like about you and then you don't actually provide some like a lead for people to talk to you about

[Galia]

like in one of their responses.

[David]

Because the only response I can give you is about like your trauma. Basically. It's either your voice note or like it's a bit like.

[Galia]

Right, yeah, there is a bit of that in here. Right.

[David]

Just give them something really light for them to like simply answer.

[Galia]

Right? Because we've got like I got horrible injuries as a kid. I was a, an addict or I'm a recovering addict. There's like there's some baggage there which is not bad, but show a little bit of a lighter side. I agree with that. Agree.

[David]

Tomorrow. Tomorrow. It says. Wait, you guys should rate mine.

[Galia]

When I was younger, I went on, wait, what's happening?

[David]

Is this hour tomorrow?

[Galia]

No, there's on. There's on Undead mommy that I saw.

[Kate]

No, no, tomorrow's in there.

[Galia]

Wait, what is.

[Harley]

Why do we. Do we have access to her profile?

[David]

Give it to us. Send it to us. Next time we gonna roast the out of you, girl.

[Galia]

She wants us to do it now.

[David]

No, next time.

[Galia]

Okay, we'll do it next time. Because it's almost 10 o'. Clock.

[Harley]

I Was gonna say no, but I was gonna start screaming.

[Galia]

Let's do like five soupies and get out of here because it's almost 10 o'. Clock.

[Kate]

Okay.

[Galia]

I'm tired.

[Kate]

Who said? Got my ton tongue biopsy results back and I was diagnosed with too much swag. Jk. I'm all good. No cancer, no disease. Family. Shout out.

[Galia]

Awesome. We love it.

[Kate]

Shout out.

[Harley]

Hell yeah. Woo.

[Galia]

We love that for you.

[Harley]

Yes, we do.

[Kate]

Yes, we do. Yes, we do. Let's see. Anley Hubard said, Harley, I'm going to Montreal on Monday to visit a pal. Suggestions for local spots to eat out minus the bagel ones. Love you guys. Kate is so smart and funny. Vivaldi, go to V Y.

[Galia]

Go to dollar des Armo.

[Harley]

Yeah, yeah. So you're a little bit out of Montreal there and you're going to Valdi, but that's. That's cool. And then go eat a poutine at the Big Orange. Because it's a big orange.

[Galia]

Big Orange. Big Orange. Love it.

[Harley]

I'm ministerial.

[Galia]

Shout out.

[Kate]

Shout out. Go.

[David]

I have. Wait, I have one place. I have one place saved in Montreal. I do have, like lists for different cities in Montreal. I have Mandy's, which I don't know what that is. I've never been there.

[Galia]

Interesting.

[Harley]

You want to spend like 15 bucks on a salad?

[Galia]

If that's your bag, then do it.

[Harley]

Good dressing, though.

[Kate]

Yeah. Better be.

[Galia]

Love a good dressing.

[Ethan]

Yeah.

[Kate]

Danny Banani said bring Chelsea, Lin and Paige on. Come on, Kate, you can do anything. Y' all can talk about fart art.

[Galia]

Oh, yeah, dude. I love them so much. I would love to have them on for sure. I actually know I know Beth, so I could for sure we could do that.

[Kate]

Hell yeah.

[Galia]

Chelsea's so busy.

[Kate]

Robin with a Y said shout out to the triforce of wisdom, the triforce of power and the triforce of ab at Shambhala. And shout out Kate and Galia for throwing David's beautiful peachy moment bridal shower. Yeah, you all do it all.

[Galia]

Oh, thank you. Thank you so much.

[Kate]

See, I'll do a couple more here. NK Purple candy said shout out to the queens in the lead for the WPBL right now. Watching you guys and them to get ready for ball tonight.

[David]

Yay.

[Galia]

Women's baseball. We love it. My team just won basketball game.

[Kate]

Shout out.

[Galia]

Shout out.

[Kate]

Shout out. God, I love Satan for saying Galia is my favorite after dark guest.

[Galia]

Yay.

[David]

Thank you so much.

[Galia]

G is the best. She works so hard and still comes and hangs out.

[Kate]

She's the best.

[Galia]

Yeah, she is.

[Kate]

And finally, shout out. Daniel Belior, who said can't believe you're still live. Live. Hup up. Long live head.

[Galia]

Shout out. We can't believe it either, but this was so much fun. Thank you for being here.

[Kate]

Oh, from quick thing from ab, he just wanted to say that the full Shambhala edit should be up for members once After Dark ends.

[Galia]

Oh my God, that's so fast. Holy crap. So you guys got more stuff to watch. Thank you, Galia, for being here. I love when you come on and hang out.

[David]

Yeah, thank you so much. And next week I'm gonna be in la, so that's exciting as well. I'm not gonna be like there with you guys, but I'm there with David.

[Galia]

I know him. Yeah, we're still trying to figure out when to Harley and I can get out there. Stay tuned for that and we will see you Tuesday for true twos. Have a great weekend, everybody.

[Harley]

Bye.

[Galia]

Bye, Harley. Bye, David.

[Kate]

Bye.

[Galia]

I love you guys. Hold it like it's your dick, Ethan. Jesus Christ.