The Asmongold Situation Is Insane - H3 Show #294

Summary

H3 Podcast #294: "The Asmongold Situation Is Insane" (August 7, 2026)

Host: Ethan Klein
Cohosts/Guests: Hila Klein, AB, Dan, Nate, Gabe, Tom, Harley

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Episode Overview

In this lively, sometimes chaotic episode, Ethan and crew tackle a range of internet and pop culture topics, centering on two headline stories: the bizarre death hoax involving Addison Rae’s dad (Monty Lopez) and Asmongold's recent ban from Twitch following an unbelievably inflammatory statement about border control. Along the way, the team welcomes back beloved regular Gabe, opens Pokémon cards with Ethan's kids, discusses impressions and shoe lifts, and dives into a wild Shambhala festival recap with AB and Harley. The episode is peppered with spontaneous jokes, call-ins, and classic H3 tangents.

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Main Segments & Key Discussion Points

1. Gabe’s Return to the Studio

[02:10 - 05:03]

• Gabe re-joins the crew as Friday co-host after caring for his dad for 16 months.
• Reflects on feeling "reborn" and shares appreciation for the support given by his family.
• Notable Quote:
  “I’m kind of like a new reborn person. Reborn.” – Gabe (04:06)
  “New Gabe 2.0, maybe.” – Ethan (04:14)

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2. Friday Rituals and Fan Call-ins

[05:19 - 14:05]

• Celebrating Gabe’s "It’s Friday, baby!" tradition, playful energy with soundbites and calls.
• A fan shares a “Pinkeye Factory” story about Great Wolf Lodge.
• Ethan and Hila’s kids make a cute appearance to talk about school.

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3. Pokémon Card Opening with Ethan’s Kids

[14:05 - 21:12]

• Teddy and Brucey join to open packs—everyone gets in on the fun.
• Love, another team member, provides rare cards.
• Light, warm family banter, ending with jokes about the value of rare pulls.
• Notable Moment: The team feigns ultra-enthusiasm for cards worth $6–$7, celebrating like they won hundreds.

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4. Impressions, Lifts, and Tall Guy Comedy

[21:10 - 34:53]

• Banter about Zach and Tamara’s Tom Ward impressions, with Tom rating the attempts.
• Deep dive into the “men’s Wonderbra”—shoe lifts inspired by Ron DeSantis’s rumored five-inch-heeled boots.
• Ethan dons a pair, tries them on live, and makes everyone try them for fun.
• Notable Quotes:
  “This is like the men’s version of the Wonder Bra, but like way crazier even.” – Ethan (28:28)
  “You want to throw those on, sweetheart? I’ve always dreamed of marrying a taller woman.” – Ethan, to Hila (34:53)

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5. Monty Lopez (Addison Rae’s Dad) Fake Death Saga

[45:53 - 63:12]

• The team reviews the week’s viral weirdness: Addison Rae’s dad faking his death on social media.
• Montage of Monty’s cryptic ER stories, staged death notices, and the subsequent online confusion (“years active: present” on Wikipedia while “died” is written above).
• Discussion of Monty's notoriety for attention-seeking stunts, past OnlyFans ventures, and post-divorce spiral.
• Notable Quotes:
  “He’s been insane. He’s still insane. And I believe he faked his death this week is why we’ll be talking about that. I believe there’s a small chance he might be dead, but it’s very unlikely.” – Ethan (08:15)
  “Monty Lopez will be remembered for his larger-than-life personality… and his ability to connect with people from all walks of life.” (54:21) — Reading fake obituary
  “Honestly, him being dead would be the craziest twist in the story.” – Ethan (54:51)

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6. EverQuest Obsession and Affiliate Code Drama

[65:05 - 68:00]

• More discussion ensues on Ethan’s latest EverQuest gaming addiction and the community rallying for an affiliate code before playing or making in-game purchases.
• Tom and Ethan banter about playing and the ethics of on-air game promotion.

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7. The Asmongold Twitch Ban: Outrageous Comments & Wider Internet Extremes

[68:04 - 127:26]

a. Background: Bizarre "Israel Did It" Border Conspiracies

[68:04 - 92:22]

• Hassan, Candace Owens, and Alex Jones all blamed Israel for the wave of migrants crossing the Moroccan–Spanish border—with little/no evidence.
• Team parodies Alex Jones’s "InfoWars" paranoia and the absurdity of stretching any geopolitical event to “Israel did it.”

Notable Quotes:
“It’s literally Israel derangement,” – Ethan (88:49)
“It’s Nazi anti-Jew propaganda you would hear during the Second World War.” – Ethan (75:25)

b. Clip Play & Analysis: Asmongold’s Shocking Take

[101:26 - 127:26]

• Asmongold, reviewing footage of thousands of mostly young men crossing from Morocco into Spanish territory, declares, "Shoot them. Problem solved. ...I’d shoot whoever. If it’s kids, women, men, anybody, just shoot them." (101:48 – 102:13)
• Crew is horrified, links to internet echo chambers, white privilege, and radicalization via livestreamer culture.
• Hila notes, "It just sounds like fantasizing about violence… very privileged because you got to grow up here and not actually live it." (122:14)
• Contrast between leftist (Hassan’s conspiracy) and rightist (Asmongold’s violent) streamer rhetoric on Twitch.

---

8. Shambhala Festival Recap with AB & Harley

[144:05 - 214:22]

• AB’s first international travel: a four-day odyssey to Canada’s wild Shambhala music festival with seasoned vet Harley.
• Managing an RV with no water, going deep undercover to acquire (and try) festival drugs, epic wardrobe changes, and surviving group paranoia, all caught on video.
• Extended debate: was a randomly-accented festival-goer actually an acid-tinged prankster or just French? Listeners polled (Acid: 54% / Molly: 46%), no clear verdict.
• Harley’s festival wisdom:
  “You attract people who like to do bits…” – Harley (200:46)
• Epic wrap-up: AB survives on no forks, no water, and a “Molly downer,” but praises the vibes, the fans, and the shared adventure.

---

9. Community Q&A, Superchats & Wrap-Up

[215:01 – End]

• Gabe guesses crew members’ ages with impressive accuracy.
• Merch drop: new Doc-and-Marty inspired t-shirt teased, with members snagging early access and discount codes.
• Plans for an extended Shambhala cut for members, and the return of After Dark—now featuring Harley, Kate, and David reviewing dating profiles.

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Memorable Quotes & Jokes

• Ethan on Asmongold: "Subhuman trash. He does look somewhat ghoulish. Maybe he just played World of Warcraft so long, he started to look like an actual ghoul." (103:10)
• On shoe lifts: “I’m a masculine guy. I’m tall, and I talk with a deep voice. You always sleep with your shoes on? That’s right.” (29:01)
• On Monty Lopez: “His legacy will live on through the lives he touched, the stories he created, and the love he gave.” (54:21, reading the fake obituary)
• Harley at Shambhala: “If you don’t [party], they beat the shit out of you. All their sons and brothers come out and beat the shit out of you.” (148:38)
• Gabe’s wisdom on violence: "Children’s the future. Why kill the future?" (128:13)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

| Segment | Start | End | |--------------------------------------|------------|------------| | Gabe Returns | 02:10 | 05:03 | | Friday Rituals & Calls | 05:19 | 14:05 | | Pokémon Card Opening | 14:05 | 21:12 | | Tom Ward Impression Banter + Lifts | 21:10 | 34:53 | | Addison Rae’s Dad Death Hoax | 45:53 | 63:12 | | EverQuest & Affiliate Code | 65:05 | 68:00 | | Asmongold Ban: Analysis & Clips | 68:04 | 127:26 | | Shambhala Recap (AB & Harley) | 144:05 | 214:22 | | Community Wrap/Q&A | 215:01 | End |

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Tone Notables

• Comedic & irreverent. No serious topic goes without a bit of ribbing, parody, or group laughter.
• Rapid-fire, overlapping banter—true to the live H3 format.
• Authentic, sometimes chaotic energy—especially with kids in-studio and festival recap.

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Conclusion

This H3 episode is both a sharp satirical takedown of internet outrage cycles and wild streamer politics, and an unfiltered window into the H3 crew's signature unpredictability. With major storylines like Monty Lopez’s fake death and Asmongold’s Twitch ban as tentpoles, the show mixes in playful family and fan moments, meme-worthy quotes, and sprawling festival tales. Listeners are treated to skepticism, skepticism, and lots of laughs—with an extra helping of YouTube/Twitch drama rigorously lampooned and a generous dose of the podcast's endearing absurdity.

Transcript

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

This episode is brought to you by Facebook. So you were scrolling on marketplace, and there it was. The bike you'd been searching for. You sent a message, and it turned out the seller was super chatty, kind of funny, and an avid cyclist. The next thing you know, you're in a cycling crew. Well, a community cycling group. The thing about Facebook, you might find more than what you're looking for. From a browse to a bike ride this summer. Find more on Facebook.

[Ethan Klein]

Unimportant. You're about to have your mind. Oh, my God. Welcome to the H3 Show. Welcome to the H3. Welcome, everybody, to the H3 Show. Where the pop meets middle age. That's right. Blowing your eardrums since 2007.

[Dan]

All right.

[Tom]

The

[Ethan Klein]

Victoria's baby Secret.

[Dan]

She listens.

[Ethan Klein]

Welcome. All right. Hey, E. H3 show. It really ws. Ah, that's good. Hey, ETH. Yes. The number one podcast in the world. Golly, I'm so hyped. So hyped. And I'm glad we're playing Zach's masterpiece again there. He's not here, though. He's not here. And Tamara's not here either. In fact, nobody's here. It's just. It's just. All I see is Dan and Nate and Tom and Galicle. Gabe on the couch. Did you switch to them, Nate? What's going on back there?

[Gabe]

He didn't.

[Ethan Klein]

Here they are. Oh, what a beautiful setting. What a nice set. Yeah, Tom, this is. Of course, you have the headphones on. Gabe, you want to be able to hear us. There should be a set behind you. Oh, there you go.

[AB]

There we go.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, you should. By the way, today's sponsored by Gamer Subs. Boy, do we love Gamer Subscribe.

[Nate]

Yes. The greatest.

[Ethan Klein]

They are the greatest. You hear this beat, Gabe?

[Gabe]

I can hear you.

[Ethan Klein]

You hear the beat?

[Gabe]

Yep.

[Ethan Klein]

Tom made.

[Hila Klein]

There you go.

[Ethan Klein]

Tom made that beat.

[Nate]

Not that good.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, stop it. You better stop right now. That's a fire beat. Thank you, love. Gabe is actually going to be joining us in person on Fridays now.

[Hila Klein]

Oh, my God.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. Did you guys know that? Yeah. He's gonna be. He's gonna be my co host right here on the couch on Fridays because he's back. You're back, Gabe.

[Gabe]

Thanks. I miss you guys. I'm gl. I'm. I'm happy to be here. And I'm. It's been. It's been long time since, you know.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Gabe]

With my dad, and I'm. I'm happy he's doing well. Everybody in my family supporting me. Yeah, that's giving me this great opportunity. Let it shine.

[Ethan Klein]

Let's go, Uncle Gabe. Shining on the couch every Friday. So you're finally back. You. We were just talking a little bit before the show. You were there for, what'd you say? Sixteen months.

[Gabe]

Sixteen months, wow. Since, you know, when my dad had his cardiac arrest, everything went on pause, you know, I only packed for, you know, a few clothes. I spent for a few days. I was thinking maybe it'd be a. Maybe a few days, a week, a couple weeks. And I didn't know it's gonna happen like that long. And then when it's like that long, I'm. I'm like. I don't know if I'm really coming back or. Well, whenever I come back, it's gonna be different.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, you're back. How's it feel? Does it feel different?

[Gabe]

It feels good. It felt. It's been long time, so I kind of feel weird, you know?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, it's been a long time, man.

[Gabe]

And then it's like, you know, I'm. I'm kind of like, feel like I'm starting over again. Like I'm new. I'm kind of like a new reborn person. Reborn.

[Ethan Klein]

New Gabe 2.0, maybe.

[Gabe]

Yep. Or just me with a new. A new engine.

[Ethan Klein]

It's a new engine. This new engine is good. It's probably a better engine if it's new. Yeah. It's not a worse engine. That wouldn't make much sense improve. You want to put it in a worse engine. That makes sense.

[Gabe]

Now it's. Everything is set. You know, I'm. I'm back in la. I don't have to worry about, you know, what I'm gonna do. I know I'm back. I have a plan. Everything secured?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. Well, it's good to have you back, Gabe. It's always nice to have you around. And it just adds so much flavor and flair to the show. And it's because those Woo babies that we miss and we need. And guess what? Not only is it Woo baby Gabes back, what is. It's also something else.

[Gabe]

Yep. Just.

[Ethan Klein]

What is it?

[Gabe]

Just starting. Starting from the bottom all the way up.

[Ethan Klein]

Right. But not that. That's not what I mean.

[Gabe]

No, I don't. I don't know.

[Hila Klein]

What are you talking about?

[Ethan Klein]

Well, today is.

[Gabe]

It's Friday, baby.

[AB]

Friday.

[Gabe]

It's Friday, baby.

[Ethan Klein]

It's Friday.

[Gabe]

It's Friday, baby. It's Friday, baby.

[Ethan Klein]

It's Friday. B, baby.

[Gabe]

Woo.

[Ethan Klein]

It's Friday, baby.

[Caller]

Woo.

[Ethan Klein]

It's Friday, baby.

[Caller]

Woo.

[Ethan Klein]

It's Friday. Baby woo. It's Friday, baby. Let's take a call.

[Gabe]

Hello?

[Ethan Klein]

It's Friday, baby. Can I help you? This Ethan Klein.

[Caller]

What?

[Hila Klein]

That is not a very Friday answer.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, that didn't work. Hey, it's Friday, baby.

[Gabe]

Woo.

[Ethan Klein]

It's Ethan Klein.

[Nate]

Are you getting a fax

[Ethan Klein]

with fans like these? Who needs snarkers with fans like these?

[Hila Klein]

One more time.

[Ethan Klein]

This Ethan Klein Woots Friday.

[Caller]

Oh, my God.

[Ethan Klein]

What's going on? How can I help you?

[Caller]

This is my 30th call of the show today.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, thank you for trying because I just took two calls and it was like a dead. I don't know what happened. It was a dead deadline.

[Caller]

Wait, I'm actually kind of mad at you because Monday I was going to bed and I was listening to Monday's episode and I woke up at the morning to fucking Big Nick singing. It was the most terrifying thing to

[Ethan Klein]

wake up to at 3am don't be mad at me. Blame Nick. I didn't make that demon music. Yeah, how can I help you?

[Caller]

I don't know. Oh, my God.

[Ethan Klein]

All right, well, you have had 30 calls to figure it out. All right.

[Caller]

I actually have something funny.

[Ethan Klein]

Go ahead. I was so close to hanging up.

[Caller]

Great Wolf Lodge. It's about Great Wolf Lodge.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. Good. Okay.

[Caller]

So my mom. There was one. I'm in the Chicago suburbs. Anyway, there used to be a water indoor water park called Key Lime Cove, which is now Great Wolf Lodge. And my mom never let us go. And I wanted to go, and she would call it the Pinkeye Factory.

[Hila Klein]

Oh, my God.

[Ethan Klein]

You know, if only that's all you got there. People are now going there and just straight up dying, I'm hearing.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

So is that the story?

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

All right, fantastic. Thanks for calling.

[Hila Klein]

Well, your mom was on to something.

[Ethan Klein]

She was on.

[Hila Klein]

She did you a favor.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, I think that I appreciate the enthusiasm. I appreciate just being on the line, frankly, after those first two. Thank you. Yeah. Lot to get to. Zach's not here today, Boy. It's just quiet. It's just quiet when he's not here. Just, you know, where's the ambience? Where's the music? Speak up. All right, what do we got today? Addison Ray. Does people even know who that is anymore?

[Hila Klein]

Oh, yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Her dad is a total.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Yeah, the girl from Fortnite.

[Ethan Klein]

Right, right. Did they add her? That's so bizarre. They're gonna add her.

[Gabe]

I thought he made the Pepsi song.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

I believe she played Coach. She's like. She's like mainstream popular.

[Ethan Klein]

Ah.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

She's not like A Like a tick tocker.

[Ethan Klein]

She's a pop star.

[Nate]

Huge pop star.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, her dad is sick and he's actually insane. He's been insane. He's still insane. And I believe he faked his death this week is why we'll be talking about that. I believe there's a small chance he might be dead, but it's very unlikely. Oh, very.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

We're not sure.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. You said she made a Pepsi song.

[Gabe]

Yeah, he made a Pepsi song that was popular. Like, it's really popular.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

How's it go?

[Gabe]

Pepsi.

[Ethan Klein]

All righty. I recognize that.

[Hila Klein]

It's like.

[Ethan Klein]

I think that's gonna help me sing it. Oh, by the way, shout out to our members episode yesterday, it was so much fun. The reviews are pouring in. They said it's one of our best episodes ever.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Really?

[Ethan Klein]

We play. Yeah, we played this game where you dub over famous movie and TV show scenes. And it was so good. Like, Hila did the good doctor. I am a surgeon.

[Hila Klein]

Honestly, I didn't know what I signed myself up to.

[Ethan Klein]

You actually did really good. And I got banned. Dan cut me off after the first line.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Yeah, you're not allowed to do that.

[Ethan Klein]

That's. I am. No, I am a surgeon. That's literally what he says. What do you want me to do? That's how he talks. Pickles. Anyway, so we got. And then asmongold caught another ban on Twitch for another crazy take. Talking about that. It's always a good time, a terrible time, depending on your perspective there. She's. She's the pop it girl right now, Ethan. She's amazing. Fantabulous, said Olive. She's the pop it girl.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Pops it.

[Ethan Klein]

Does that mean she's the it girl right now, or is that.

[Gabe]

Yes.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, the pop it. She's the pop it girl. I see. I see.

[Hila Klein]

Yes.

[Ethan Klein]

I thought she's a pop it. I was like, it's a pop it.

[Nate]

Maybe both.

[Ethan Klein]

I thought it was like a dance move.

[Gabe]

Pop it.

[Ethan Klein]

Sorry. Bad, stupid, horrible, big moves in Norath. Dan, I don't know where you're at, but I. I got a ton of levels last night in lower Duck. And I'm not gonna say.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Are you 40 yet?

[Ethan Klein]

I think I believe I'm maybe third. I don't remember.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

I have 40 last night.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, I'm 38. I'm, like, right behind you, bro.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

You are catching up.

[Ethan Klein]

No, but do. My guy is so. My guy's, like, invincible now. I have insane armor, bro. H. It's crazy.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

We'll see about that.

[Ethan Klein]

And I. And I hit the. The 1%. I. I have like, over 50 life regen, bro.

[Gabe]

Per.

[Ethan Klein]

Tick.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Crazy.

[Caller]

It is.

[Ethan Klein]

Anyway, it's fun.

[Hila Klein]

We have visitors today at work.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, the kiddos are here.

[Hila Klein]

They want to say hi.

[Ethan Klein]

All right, here comes Teddy. Hello, Teddy. Teddy is. Let's see here. They. Why are they here today? They just took the day off of. They have summer camp.

[Hila Klein]

They've been wanting to come.

[Ethan Klein]

They just wanted to come.

[Hila Klein]

So it's last day of summer.

[Ethan Klein]

What a. Look at these faces. What a couple of beautiful faces. Oh, yeah. Back to school. Are you excited for school? Back to school?

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Gabe]

What?

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

First grade. Second grade.

[Hila Klein]

Teddy going to second.

[Ethan Klein]

Second. Second, and then Brucie's going to TK and they're going to be at the same school for the first time.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

That's huge. That's a huge moment.

[Ethan Klein]

You're going to look after your little brother. Good. Good boy. You guys got. Can you guys play together at recess? No, because there's. There's a. You could talk right here if you want them to hear you. You can't move it, though. You just got to move your head. There is. There's a play area.

[Kate]

Hello,

[Gabe]

Kinder.

[Kate]

And then.

[Ethan Klein]

And then there's a play area for first grade. You can't go back there and play with him. They don't let you.

[Caller]

No.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Separate them.

[Ethan Klein]

I guess that's fair enough.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

The big kids are scary sometimes. With your little tk you're you excited, Brucey, to go to your new school? They let you, like, just go in there and say hi. But they can't. But they don't let you, like, play in there.

[Caller]

They.

[Ethan Klein]

They let you go inside to say hi, but, like, they don't let you play in there. Got it? Because you don't. Yeah. They're so little. The TK Is in the kindergartners now. You're huge. What? You're in second grade now, so it's probably insane how much bigger you are. Anywho, guys, always a pleasure to have you in studio. That's my boys, everybody. It's my boy, Teddy and Bruce. Come on. Who you kidding? Sonny's at home because he's just.

[Tom]

He's.

[Ethan Klein]

He's a little too much of a youngster. He's not ready.

[Hila Klein]

He still takes a nap in the middle of the day.

[Ethan Klein]

Not ready for that big.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Studio life.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

You know what you want to be? Have you changed your mind on what do you want to do when you grow up? What do you want to do when you grow up? I see Daddy. Daddy. I see you do a podcast.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, no.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

You got to talk them out of that.

[Ethan Klein]

I'm trying. No, no, no, I'm trying. Brucey, what do you want to do when you grow up?

[Hila Klein]

Talk to the mic here.

[Ethan Klein]

I don't know. That's completely fair. That's. That's a great.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

That's probably the right. That's probably the right place to be at your age.

[Ethan Klein]

All right, I got a little podcaster here. We're gonna try to talk him out of it, though. I mean, his chance is. Teddy's my boss.

[AB]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

You guys. You guys better show some respect to the little man.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah, yeah.

[Harley]

Oh,

[Ethan Klein]

no, wait, wait. We should do an opening right now.

[Gabe]

Here, here.

[Ethan Klein]

Come stand right here. Come stand right here next to me, love. Just dropped a pack of Pokemon cards off for the young boy.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Flip over your phone.

[Ethan Klein]

So, wait, we got. We got a perfect order pack.

[Harley]

Now.

[Ethan Klein]

Is that one. What is that one, Love? It's the most expensive pack. He says it's a really rare one. Teddy says, yeah, they're rare. Oh, one for each kid. So hold on. If we can get the overhead.

[AB]

Hold on.

[Harley]

Wait.

[Ethan Klein]

Wait till you open it so we can get an overhead shot and do a real poll here. One for each kid. Those two. And then me, too. Here, you let Teddy do. Says, and then you'll go after. Okay, Brucie. All right, go ahead, Teddy. You can open it and. And then you show here on the overhead.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Hold on.

[Ethan Klein]

There you go.

[Gabe]

There you go. There.

[Ethan Klein]

There you go. See, Teddy? So they can see what you're getting now. That's the camera that they're seeing at home. All right. You need help?

[Hila Klein]

Do we get some tension music going?

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Let me see what I got. Okay, this is.

[Ethan Klein]

Get it started. There you go. All right, here we go. So the three last cards are going to be the most interesting, but all carts are very cool.

[Caller]

This.

[Ethan Klein]

This pack or this perfect order has a lot of hits. Oh, we're going from the back. Okay, that's cool. Oh, oh, oh. We're blowing past. These are the foils.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

These are the good ones, right?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. So we didn't get any super hyper rares, but these are beautiful shinies, right, Love?

[Kate]

Yep.

[Ethan Klein]

There are reverse holos and one Holo. One Holo. One. Reverse Holo. One Holo. Holo. Wow. One. Hello, Holo. I mean, now I'll think. What do we think? So we got some cool. We got a rowlet. That's the green pack. You got only greens. That's pretty cool.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

That's very rare. It's extremely rare.

[Ethan Klein]

All right, Bruce, are you ready for yours? Oh, and you gotta show the code card to the people.

[Gabe]

Wait, wait.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

You gotta show the what card?

[Ethan Klein]

The code card.

[Gabe]

Show it.

[Ethan Klein]

What does that do for them? People can use it on the app if it'll focus.

[Dan]

There you go.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, people got it. What did they use it on the app for? There you go. They got it to get the card. Nate wants it. He's blurring it out. By the way, did you thank love?

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Oh, there it is. There it is.

[Ethan Klein]

No problem. All right, Bruce, your turn. Ready? Let me get it started first.

[Caller]

You.

[Ethan Klein]

This is very exciting. Come on, baby. We're going to need a good pull here.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Come on, come on, come on.

[Ethan Klein]

All right, you want me to do it or you want to do it? All right, from the top.

[Nate]

Flip it over.

[Ethan Klein]

No, flip it over, flip it over, flip it over. All right, ready? We got a star guy. We got an owl with keys.

[Hila Klein]

Okay.

[Ethan Klein]

We got a potion. We got a rowlet. We have a core memory. Core memory.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

It's the big ones.

[Ethan Klein]

Talonflame, yo. That's a normal mew stick. Okay, here comes the. The two next ones are possibly rare.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

This is where you're gonna get big hits.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, careful. Energy. Oh, you hit.

[Kate]

That's huge.

[Ethan Klein]

That's huge. That's really good.

[Gabe]

Whoa.

[Ethan Klein]

That's really, really good.

[Gabe]

Wow.

[Ethan Klein]

How's that illustration Rare?

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

It's. It's. Just hold it at the normal level.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah. Lower, Ethan, lower.

[Ethan Klein]

That's really cool. Hold on, hold on. Don't bend it. Guys, be careful. This here, that's a mega starmie. Yeah, that's really cool, actually. That's a sick one. Yeah, that's a rare one.

[Hila Klein]

Yay.

[Ethan Klein]

So that's good. Poll Brucie. Now they fight over it and they trade for it. And Teddy schemes a way to get it into his folder, basically. Oh, we got. Yeah, we got a plastic here. Let's pop that in there. What's this one run? 6.87. Let me put it in the plastic. $100, mate. No, $7.

[Hila Klein]

$7, you guys. Yay.

[Ethan Klein]

No, it's 100 bucks.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

No, it's a hundred dollars.

[Ethan Klein]

You want me? You want to do it?

[Hila Klein]

We keep it real with our boys, then.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Let's not have kids, Nate.

[Ethan Klein]

We don't keep it a buck with the kids.

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Well done. Okay, we got in the plastic. Wow. Thank you. Did you thank love.

[Gabe]

Whoa.

[Kate]

Another one.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, my God. Pokemon. Teddy, why don't you open that one? Because, Bruce, you got super rare Brucey. Did you thank Love? No problem. You did okay. Just making sure. It was really nice of him to do that. Thank you, love. No problem. I think it's worth. I don't know. It's really valuable. Yes. All right, here we go. One more time, Teddy. Looking for those ultra rares. Come on. Come on, Pokemon gods. Move a little over. Oh, come on, Arceus.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Look at this.

[Ethan Klein]

May Arceus bless. You can look at the camera. Oh, Teddy, do them over here. Yeah, There you go.

[Gabe]

Perfect. All right.

[Ethan Klein]

All right. Just pop them right here. The suspense is killing us. We already saw them. All right, we're gonna look at them again.

[Gabe]

Wow.

[Ethan Klein]

Everybody at home is just. Whoa, whoa, whoa. What is that?

[Nate]

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

[AB]

That's another.

[Ethan Klein]

That's another rare one. What is that, love? I can't see. But that's an illustration.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Rare, too, Ethan, when you hold it up high.

[Ethan Klein]

I'm trying.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Just don't have to do it high like that.

[Ethan Klein]

I literally can't see.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Because you're moving.

[Ethan Klein]

I'm trying to put it in the middle. Okay, there. I can't see. Hold on. Let's put it in plastic. That one's a deenie. The deie. It goes for $6. Oh, you both got a ultra rare.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

That's $600. That's crazy.

[Ethan Klein]

$6.

[Hila Klein]

$6.

[Ethan Klein]

$2.

[Hila Klein]

Six.

[Gabe]

About the same.

[Hila Klein]

No. What? What is it?

[AB]

Wow.

[Ethan Klein]

Look how cute the little mouse is, though.

[Caller]

That's.

[Ethan Klein]

No, he's de. Oh, love. Coming through with the plastic. Gotta protect it. Yeah, yeah, we'll save that. We got a box for all the good ones at home. Oh, that was so nice of you, love. Thank you for sharing that. How exciting. You have one more shiny than you did when you came. And apparently you guys at home want to do this? I guess it gets it on the. On the game for you. Yeah, you can open a virtual package.

[Hila Klein]

Oh.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh. Did you know that, Bruce? Because they love that game. Oh, too late. Oh, Only one time. Yeah, one time. Now we know. Shoot. That's cool. I got a bunch. All right, get out of here, you guys. I got a show to do. Here, take these in. Skedaddle. All right. I didn't know that. We've had so many of those. I just throw them out. Too bad. Probably should have read what was on it.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

I'm just so used to it being junk, you know?

[Tom]

Right.

[Ethan Klein]

I mean, they're not. They're easy to come by.

[Gabe]

You.

[Ethan Klein]

Can I have, like, 100 if you guys want it. I got you. There it is, guys. Wow. Now, Tom, one thing I wanted to talk to you about specifically is we're in a Tom Ward impression era, but Zach and Tamara are both gone and they're kind of.

[Nate]

Wait, Tamara does one, too?

[Ethan Klein]

She's one that did the first one, apparently, on the call waiting. She did months ago. She did a Tom Ward impression.

[Nate]

Did she call me a pedo in the impression?

[Ethan Klein]

No, she did not.

[Nate]

Well, I appreciate that.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

No, she didn't say anything like that.

[Nate]

That's nice.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

I don't think hers was trying too hard to sound like Tom.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, she was the first one to thought, sure, someone needs to do a Tom Ward impression.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

I guess so. Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

But have you heard them at all?

[Nate]

I heard Zach's, and I was not that impressed.

[Ethan Klein]

You know, I wasn't that impressed either, but everybody else seemed to think it was, like, the best impression ever.

[Nate]

Zach's normal voice. I see people say that all the sounds like me, so he wouldn't even really have to change it that much.

[Ethan Klein]

But you don't have an accent, but you do have, like, an inflection. We go, yeah, yeah, yeah. You go, yeah. You know, it's just. I don't know why they won't answer my calls. I've tried to, you know, I've came at it from every angle, and I just can't get through them.

[Nate]

I have children.

[Ethan Klein]

You have girls. We have girls.

[Nate]

I have daughters.

[Ethan Klein]

I have two daughters. Got daughters. I got daughters. Yeah. I don't know why he does, like, a Winnipeg accent. I don't get.

[Nate]

Yeah, it's kind of Canadian. Chicago.

[Ethan Klein]

That's not right.

[Nate]

It's not right.

[Ethan Klein]

Where'd you grow up?

[Nate]

New Jersey.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, so it's not even close.

[Nate]

It's not even close.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[Nate]

Thumbs down on the impression.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. You know, we really need to get ads. We don't. On Wednesday, we have no ads. Is that good? I don't know. To me, it's more about the inflection, the. Yeah, yeah, you know, I know what you mean. Not so much the accent.

[Hila Klein]

I can't really talk about it without Zach being here.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, it's tough. It's a waste. I'm hearing some mic, like, static, like, beep, beep. I don't know. I don't know if they can hear it at home. Yeah, just going. Dan's running around. He's short staffed.

[Hila Klein]

It was already trying to help me because my headphones are not working.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, maybe what you hear, it goes.

[Gabe]

Oh,

[AB]

All right.

[Nate]

Does anyone do impressions of anyone else on the show? I mean, why am I the subject?

[Ethan Klein]

I mean, it just come. I Mean, so we all.

[Gabe]

You're back.

[Ethan Klein]

Who let him back?

[Gabe]

What?

[Ethan Klein]

Who let him back. Get out of here, you little shrimps. I got a show to do, you troublemakers. All right, you guys want McDonald's or something? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I want McDonald's. I do want McDonald's. I take any excuse to eat like a monster when I'm around them. Hey, this is Ethan Klein calling. What can I do for you today?

[Caller]

Hi, Ethan. I have a really big problem.

[Ethan Klein]

Alrighty, thanks.

[Caller]

So we are having an Ohio H3 meetup tonight and our friend Abby cannot make it. Can you please help me convince her to come out? Because she's being a little bit of a curmudgeon.

[Ethan Klein]

What's her excuse?

[Caller]

She didn't really give us one.

[Ethan Klein]

She just. She just said, I can't make it with no further info.

[Caller]

Yeah, well, then she was like, I'm like, ethan. And then I was like, why? Because you won't go out.

[Ethan Klein]

That's true. I mean, there's no better way to honor me than not going out. I mean, she does have a point.

[Caller]

Okay, well, you're not helping us.

[Ethan Klein]

So I'm just. I'm just being honest. I might be. I might be on her side, you know, Stay at home.

[Caller]

Okay.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, no, I. Listen, listen. Okay.

[Dan]

I'm sorry.

[Ethan Klein]

Let me. Let me walk in.

[Caller]

It's okay.

[Ethan Klein]

Get outside. You know, don't. Don't you want to get out? You want to get out there and meet people and see their faces and stuff? Where are you guys meeting? Like a restaurant?

[Caller]

Yeah, ish. Like a market.

[Ethan Klein]

A market. Okay.

[Caller]

Yeah, the east market.

[Ethan Klein]

All right. How many people showing up?

[Caller]

We got Lexi, we got Vicki, we got Anthony, we got Anthony.

[Ethan Klein]

Two Anthony's.

[Caller]

Yeah, Tony and Anthony. Anthony squared.

[Ethan Klein]

Tony Ace. Tony and Anthony. The meat and frozen solid.

[Caller]

That wasn't good.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, come on. You're gonna call in and criticize my accent? All right, listen. I don't know, Abby. Get your ass in gear and get out there and be with your friends. All right?

[Caller]

All right. Appreciate you.

[Ethan Klein]

Maybe you guys all go to Gabby's house.

[Caller]

Abby, right? With an A. Right, Right. Okay. Yeah. Maybe she didn't invite us, though.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, Abby or Gabby make. Invite them to your place.

[Caller]

Okay.

[Kate]

All right.

[Ethan Klein]

Bruce says hi.

[Caller]

This is helpful.

[Ethan Klein]

All right, thanks. I'm glad I could help. All right, take care. Thanks.

[Gabe]

Bye.

[Caller]

Bye.

[Ethan Klein]

Thanks for watching. Bye. And that's how we do it, guys. That's how we solve problems. Bruce is back. That's how we solve problems, guys. You call in with a problem and I've got solutions for days. All right, I need a solution to this shrimp running into the camera every second. Oh, I'm feeling extra tall today, Dan. Are we doing that today? I got. What was the context of the lifts,

[Gabe]

J.D.

[Kate]

vance?

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, yeah, it was. We were looking this week at Ron Desantis, how he has fake boots. They're like high heel shoes, but they look like normal boots. And I was like, I need to get one of those. Can you send me one of those photos and in discord so I can give a little context? And so apparently this shoe that looks like relatively normal boot, right, Gabe?

[Gabe]

Oh, yeah, that looks normal to me. Maybe.

[Ethan Klein]

You know what's inside of this? A five inch high heel.

[Gabe]

Whoa.

[Ethan Klein]

So I'm going to put this on, and if I'm 5 11, I'm about to be 6 4. And I'm gonna tower over Tom, who's now sitting down with some. What do you got there?

[Nate]

I got honey walnut shrimp from Panda Express.

[Ethan Klein]

Always on the disposable plate too, eh?

[Nate]

Always wasting.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, yeah. So not.

[Gabe]

Not.

[Ethan Klein]

Not accusing of wasting. It's just a class.

[Nate]

Oh. But they dropped off the wrong order earlier. There's chicken fried rice if anyone would like some.

[Ethan Klein]

Mmm. Nice, huh? So this is his shoe, right? And he's got, without a doubt, a heel area here. And he says he's like 5 11, but people suspect he. He might be 55 or 54 even, right? So I'm gonna pop these on, right? And I'm gonna. I'm gonna do this. I'm gonna be 64 now. I'm going clubbing. I'm 64 now.

[Gabe]

There you go.

[Ethan Klein]

This is like the men's version of the Wonder Bra, but, like, way crazier even. You get home, you're like, all right, baby. Oh, why don't you take off your shoes? No, no, no. I like to wear my shoes in bed. Oh, my God. My heel is like, right at the top of the fucking. That's crazy. That's crazy. Okay, here we go. Yeah. Oh, my God, you're so tall. I love that you're so tall. Are your parents tall? That's right, baby. Run through my family.

[Nate]

Why does your voice go down when you're taller? It just happens.

[Dan]

Just.

[Ethan Klein]

I'm a masculine guy. I'm tall, and I talk with a deep voice. You always sleep with your shoes on? That's right. I'm into it. Keep your shoes on, too. Sweet toots. Come over here into my six forearms. All right, let me put this on

[Gabe]

my tall personality that's right.

[Ethan Klein]

You know what else is tall? My personality.

[Gabe]

He gotcha.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, baby. That's what being 64 sounds and feels like. Hey, baby, my meat's frozen solid here. That's right.

[Gabe]

Come on, now. I'm like, I'm better than you.

[Ethan Klein]

I'm so much better than these little men out there.

[Nate]

Does your dick get bigger, too?

[Ethan Klein]

That's right. I've got high heels for my cock. All right, here I go. Ready? Here, come stand next to me. You're. You're taller than me, right? I mean, you're like. What are you, like, six, one. Six foot? All right, you ready for this?

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

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[Nate]

Bro, I feel like. I feel like a woman next to you.

[Ethan Klein]

You should. Hey, look at this little guy. We have fun with Tom, don't we, folks?

[Gabe]

Wow.

[Ethan Klein]

Grab a mic from Gabe or something.

[Gabe]

Or Tom.

[Caller]

Thank you.

[Ethan Klein]

All right, Come get a. Come get a shot of my feet and tell me, does that look natural to you, Dan? Oh, little pip squeak. Your feet are so skinny in them. I'm on my heels, bro. I'm strutting around like I got a legs to show. Hey, come on. It's just me, Ethan Klein. Hila. Come over here. Honestly, like, if you didn't. Yeah. If you didn't look at it closely, you probably could get away with it, maybe. Really? Come here. Hila. Hey, baby. How's it feel to be with a tall man? That's right. That's right. Sure is sweet, toots. Look at that heel basically coming out the top. That's right. Son. Son, if you eat your meat and drink your milk, you can be tall like me one day. You like it? You realize you want to be with a tall man. Oh, great.

[Hila Klein]

Got to rethink everything.

[Ethan Klein]

That's right. Well. Well, I hear that all the time. And luckily, I no longer need leg extension surgery. Although maybe I'll do both. I'll be seven foot. All right. Do they look weird, Teddy? Weird about them?

[Gabe]

They're really.

[Ethan Klein]

They're too big. In what way? Point out what's weird about it. What's Too big about it.

[Caller]

Too big.

[Ethan Klein]

There's too much stuff going on there.

[Harley]

Right.

[Ethan Klein]

It's way. There's way too much, like, area. Yeah. Well, son, that's. When you get tall like me, your foot tends to take up more space in its shoe, son. So you excited to be tall when you grow up?

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

There it is. All right. All right. Thank you. This is very good. I think when we have. When we have guests in the studio, I should put these on for the picture without telling them, so only our fans will know. I'll just be towering over every single one of our guests. Like, Pacman's coming in next week. I should throw these on when we take a photo together. I think I'm gonna do that. That's the thing. I didn't even do that. Think you have to. Every time we take a photo with someone in studio, I'm putting these on. That is so funny. That is so funny. I am so funny. That's crazy. You ever heard of something like that,

[Gabe]

Gabe, can I say it?

[Ethan Klein]

You following at all?

[Gabe]

Yeah, just a little bit.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, right. So what am I talking about?

[Gabe]

Are you talking about, like, shoe height and then something else after that?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, there was something after that.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

I love Gabe. He's the man. Yeah. I was saying. I said something really funny about shoes, but it's okay. We'll figure it out as we go. I was saying, when we have guests, I'm gonna put these on so I appear taller than them. That's a good bet. You want to try these on? No, baby, no. You don't need these. You don't need to see inside of these, sweetheart. I will say, Ethan, Hila was smiling pretty hard. I know. It made me feel kind of bad. She was like, oh, beaming, bro. I want to see Gabe wearing them, too. Well, we looked at it like we looked at the. No, it's five inches. It's actually five inches. Yeah. No, this is the Ron Desantis special right there. Boy. You want to throw those on, sweetheart? I've always dreamed of marrying a taller woman. That's right.

[Gabe]

What size are these shoes?

[Ethan Klein]

You want to see what it's like? I don't know. I don't know what size they are. You want to put them on? I think they bought them your size, Ethan. Yeah, Yeah. I just.

[Gabe]

I don't know. All right, I'll give it a try. That's. I'm size 10.

[Ethan Klein]

You'll fit in that.

[Gabe]

I think maybe I'll fit that.

[Ethan Klein]

Squeeze those tight little feet in there, Gabe. Oh, all right. Gabe's about to feel what it. What it. What it feels like to be a real man. Gabe, you got to go back to the Philippines with those on. You know what I'm saying? Find yourself a bride. He needs to. That's right. All right. Gabe is throwing on the high heels. I mean, the shoes. Look at that. Yeah, show it. Show it off. Yeah. How's it feel to be tall, Gabe? Look at this. Look. You see? I didn't fake it. I am tall. I'm six four, baby. How's it feel, though, to put on five inches?

[Gabe]

It feels good, but a little awkward, but I'll get used to it.

[Ethan Klein]

So you're gonna. You're gonna wear these now permanently?

[Gabe]

Maybe. For sure, but maybe. I think so.

[Ethan Klein]

There it is. All right, Teddy, those are really big. You want to try? I don't think it's gonna work because your foot's gonna slide into the front of it. You could try.

[Gabe]

Go try.

[Ethan Klein]

Put them on and then. Oh, this year's. Should I. I think Gabe, Mike's off. My T levels are off the charts. Baby, get on over here. I got something.

[Gabe]

What brand is this? Oh, Kyle. Kyle. Kyle Brown.

[Tom]

That's it.

[Ethan Klein]

You want to try too? You guys can try it. I don't know if it's gonna fit you, but you could try to put your foot in there. Yeah. I love this. This is my new guest photo outfit. Come on. I will say, Gabe, look, it looks very natural.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

And Gabe.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah? It didn't look as weird, so. How dare you. We got to get him a pair. Teddy is hobbling around in his high heels. All right, enough. So this. I'm not going to talk about A.D. oh, we'll do our idea. I actually. That's such a good idea. You know, I'm thank our wonderful sponsors over at. That's right. Tom, Dan, Ethan, we need music or. I'm. I'm just. I can't work like this. Gamer sucks.

[Gabe]

Gg.

[Ethan Klein]

That's right, folks. All right, everybody, any music we need?

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Zach, bro.

[Ethan Klein]

Ab, you're at the desk. You got no music for me? Okay, this, I'll take anything. Honestly, I'll take anything. There you go. A little Fireside brand deal here for gamer subs. Have you ever wanted to curl up next to a warm fire with your loved ones? One crack open a fresh bottle of gamer subs swirled around in a wine glass. Give it a good smell. Smells like love. Sounds like romance. That's right. Gamersupps. Actually, not only does it taste great, feels great for your body, extra hydrating Fortified with minerals, electrolytes, vitamins and caffeine if that's what you're into. I like caffeine because it keeps me up all night. Would you like a refill, baby? The fire high enough? Come here, sweetheart. Let me keep you warm. You know, gamer subs comes in all kinds of delicious flavors, but most importantly. Comes in strawberry lemonade. That's our special flavor, baby. That's right. Not all my six four. Today I've got my own flavor on gamer subs. That's okay. I know it's very impressive. It's very impressive. There's much more to me than than meets the eye. What's a better flavor than strawberry lemonade? I can't think of a single one. But here's the thing. I don't have to because if you're not into that, there's a million other flavors on the website. And if you use code H3, you get 10% off your order. There's no sugar. You are going to get more hydrated. You are going to be feeling good. You're going to have more time by the fire. Isn't that right, Tom?

[Nate]

It also makes you taller.

[Ethan Klein]

Makes you gains 5 inches.

[Gabe]

Actually makes you smell good too.

[Ethan Klein]

That's great. Yeah, you sweat it out in a. A pleasant aromatic scent.

[Gabe]

Just a natural perfume or.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh yeah, love natural perfume. What can I say guys, it's so important. The caffeine free.

[Dan]

Sold out.

[Ethan Klein]

I think it's back in stock now.

[Nate]

Back now.

[Ethan Klein]

So get it. You know they. These are flying off the shelf and for good reason. But if you want to support the show, if you want to get yourself a delicious keto friendly sugar free drink that is going to keep you hydrated and keep you drinking more fluids because it tastes so good, you're going to want to try this. So go to GamersUPs GG and use code H3 to get 10% off your order. And don't forget to try our very own strawberry lemonade. I love my strawberry lemonade. I drink it every day. And love. Good boy. He would be scru.

[Dan]

I'm dying.

[Ethan Klein]

He'd be dying of thirst like Clint Eastwood was crawling through the desert. And I believe it was the good, the bad, the ugly.

[Dan]

I don't remember.

[Gabe]

It's more refreshing than soda.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, by a long shot. Not even close.

[Gabe]

Oh yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Not a joke.

[Gabe]

Probably. Probably makes me more hydrated. I don't have to think about drinking anymore.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, that's the thing. You drink. Drink more, you have to drink less.

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Hila Klein]

You want to try it for Real? Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, you've never tried our strawberry lemonade?

[Gabe]

Oh no, not yet.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, hit this. Yeah, hit that. Nice. Cold. Ice cold.

[Gabe]

Ice cold.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, give that a shot. That's caffeinated. It's got minerals, vitamins, electrolytes. Zero sugar, buddy. Zero. Hit that. Let it hydrate you. Let it wash over your taste buds. Let it rejuvenate your cells. Bring you back. That's good, eh? That's right. You can hold on to that if you want it.

[Gabe]

Sure.

[Ethan Klein]

There it is. All right. Thank you so much to our wonderful sponsors. Over Gamer subs. We love you, we appreciate you. Please consider supporting them. Code HD10OFF thank you. I dreamed of a day with me and my gamer subs and my baby by the fireplace. I gained 5 inches and I'm not talking about my legs. Come on, that's what it does for you, Dan. Alright, let's get out of this. Hi, this is Ethan Klein, how can I help you?

[Caller]

Hi. Oh my gosh, I'm so excited. I'm Natalie.

[Ethan Klein]

Hi Natalie.

[Caller]

I'm from Hershey, Pennsylvania.

[Ethan Klein]

Hershey.

[Caller]

And yes, Hershey, where they make all the chocolate.

[Nate]

Shout out. Hershey park too.

[Ethan Klein]

Yes, it's named after the location, the city.

[Caller]

It was made by Milton Hershey, the founder of Hershey.

[Ethan Klein]

So they named the whole last city after him.

[Caller]

Yeah, well he, he created it so that all of his like factory employees would have a place to like raise their families. So that's also.

[Ethan Klein]

It's like beast. It's like a beast commune. How all they all live together?

[Caller]

Kind of. Yeah. Okay, so I have a question for. I want at least. I'm hoping at least three people will answer. What is a skill that you guys have that everybody would be surprised to know that you have?

[Ethan Klein]

Bruh, I'm really good at. I bro. I'm really. My warrior is really stronger than you would expect in EverQuest.

[Caller]

Oh, okay.

[Ethan Klein]

I don't know. What would you have a skill? I don't. I'm not. I have no surprises and frankly I've done this show for too long. I think anything that I might know,

[Hila Klein]

we don't have much a surprise win.

[Ethan Klein]

Anyone else got a surprising scale? Any of you? Hershey? You said it, Gabe.

[Gabe]

We used to have a, A Shih Tzu name a chocolate Shihu. We named it Hershy after the chocolate because it's like chocolate. That's a. It's a chocolate fur collared. So we named it Hershey.

[Ethan Klein]

Hershey. All right, anything else? Anything else, caller?

[Caller]

Oh, anything from me? I'm sorry, no, I'M just I to say that I am such a big fan of you guys. I've watched for years and years and I really appreciate you.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, that's so. Oh, I love you. Thank you so much for sharing that. I'm so grateful.

[Hila Klein]

The chat said this staghorn is the skill you have.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh my God, that's such a good point. Well, I don't think she would be surprised, but you might be. Gabe, do you know what a staghorn is? Yeehaw.

[Gabe]

That's what. That's what I think about.

[Ethan Klein]

You're coming to Germany with me. All right, let's get to some stories, eh? Did we order McDonald's? Hila. I need. I need that. Oh, God.

[Hila Klein]

Write what you want in the. In the discord.

[Ethan Klein]

I want the regular schmegular. You know what it is?

[Caller]

I'm.

[Ethan Klein]

Excuse me. Let's do the show now, please. Ethan, Addison Ray's dad, Is he dead or alive? Probably alive, but maybe dead. Let's take a look. Do we care either way? Not really. He's a weird guy and he always gave me bad, bad vibes, so. I mean, if he is dead, it's not going to really matter. I'm just being honest, love. Just saying it like it is, you know? I don't care if he's alive or not. But it is interesting either way. It would be interesting if he faked his death. Certainly. So Addison Rae is apparently the it girl. When did that happen? I thought she was just some TikTok dancer.

[Hila Klein]

No, no.

[Gabe]

Yeah, I thought he's famous for the Pepsi. For Pepsi.

[Nate]

Oh, she started hanging with Charlie xcx, who took her under her wing.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, that's big. Yeah, that's very big.

[Hila Klein]

She's really big.

[Ethan Klein]

Eli, you don't know the regular schmegular?

[Hila Klein]

I don't remember.

[Ethan Klein]

All right, there it is. So here is the tweet by Monty and this guy has kind of a history of being like a really bizarre drama queen. Attention getter. In fact, we could probably look at some prior examples of it. But he did leave a paper trail. That's the part that's somewhat compelling about it this way? A little bit. Yeah. Teddy's got. Was that a Godzilla? Godzilla shooting the atomic breath. A whale. Godzilla. Whale Godzilla. Oh, I see. It's written and then there's a guy jumping out of the building. That's great. I love that. What a story. What a story. What a story unfolding right on paper. Thank you, you. Thank you, youngster. Oh, that felt amazing. What a pick me up Anyway, it's tough without Zach. I'll be honest. I'm out here like I'm treading water. I'm out here. Zach. Ab, what's going on back there? Your mic's not even on, man. I've been doing all the sound bites. I don't think AB knows he has. Oh, AB Wait, why are you sitting there then?

[Hila Klein]

AB I think the kids.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

He's been trying to do sound bites.

[Ethan Klein]

I, I.

[AB]

Apparently there's trying to do them and Dan said he's been hearing them, but now I just found out it was Nate doing them and not me. So you.

[Ethan Klein]

Wait, hold on. Oh, you've been playing them and nobody heard it? Yes, because.

[Nate]

Because that.

[AB]

Dan said he's been hearing them, but it's been Nate, not me, I think.

[Ethan Klein]

So you've been. You've been doing a symphony for one.

[Kate]

Yes.

[Ethan Klein]

That's good.

[Nate]

Thank you.

[Ethan Klein]

It's been really. I'll be honest, it's been crickets out here. Absolutely.

[AB]

I think that's this guy.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Don't put the crickets on the lack of Zach. You're the host. Step up.

[Ethan Klein]

No, we have a energy. He's in the. I'm trying. Dan. He's in the seat. Try a little hard. If he's going to sit there, I want to hear sound bites, even if it is literally crickets.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Sound bites have been playing. Are you not hearing them?

[Ethan Klein]

I've heard like f. Request level ups. That's it.

[Gabe]

How about I create my own sound

[Ethan Klein]

play sound right now? A.B. go ahead, Gabe. That's helpful too. You playing, laughing. I heard that. Super low. And what is that, what is that supposed to convey to the audience, Gabe?

[Gabe]

I'd say, I'd say if you're nervous or you try to be creative with soundbites or, or just gonna let it out because you're like, you're exhausted. I go,

[Ethan Klein]

Thank you, buddy. That helps. Yes, sir.

[Hila Klein]

Darn it.

[Ethan Klein]

Is that a stegosaurus? Oh, it's a crocodile. Rocky Fresh. There it is. All right. Thank you, sir.

[Nate]

Ah.

[Ethan Klein]

So what did Monty. What has he been up to in the past? Oh, my goodness. All right, here we. What else we got? Bruce, over here. It's a blue Lamborghini.

[Dan]

Wow.

[Ethan Klein]

Did you draw this? Yeah. I didn't know you. You love blue lamb. It's a blue lamb. That's so cool. What are we gonna do with this?

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

He's asking you to buy one.

[Ethan Klein]

Do you want one of these? Brucy, do you want one of these? All right, Daddy's coming. Are you already Back up here. All right, Everybody's got Lamborghinis. Is that the car you want, Teddy, when you're 16? That's a Ferrari, actually. Actually, that's a Ferrari, actually. I like wood. This is also a Ferrari, I believe. No, that's a Lamborghini. Okay. I don't know. That's a Mustang. Is it? Why, you guys. What is happening here? Why are we just. We're just printing car clip art. That's a really rare Hot Wheel, that one car. Why, Lena? Why are you guys printing car clip art? You know, paper and ink is expensive. You think paper and ink grows on the. On trees? All right, get out of here. I'm trying to do a show, for Christ's sake. They seem to really love gold. Shiny gold.

[Hila Klein]

Lamborghinis, specifically.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Who doesn't?

[Ethan Klein]

All right, you got something for Monty? What was his story? Monty? I asked Monty. I need info about Monty. What's his story up again? We don't know nothing about that.

[Gabe]

Famous for steaks. There's a Monty Steakhouse out in the Woodland hills of Topanga. That's the thing. I know about Monte.

[Ethan Klein]

He's also Addison Rae's dad.

[Gabe]

Okay.

[Ethan Klein]

And he's also apparently died. He said third trip to the ER in two weeks. Come on, man. And this was from four days ago? Yeah. So then the breadcrumbs continue. A series of Instagram stories of him in the er. Let's take a look. That looks like a. Did he do that on purpose to make it look like his is censored out? He would do.

[AB]

So cute when you talk.

[Gabe]

Probably.

[Ethan Klein]

Also, it says three times two, which makes it seem like a measurement. He's so. He's such a rascal. He is definitely in the hospital. There's no question. Look at the song choices he picks for each story. I have no idea what that is.

[AB]

I wanted to get with everybody and let them know we was gonna start the straight Lopez 48. So we'll go straight with 48, and

[Ethan Klein]

we probably about 12 hours in, and

[AB]

I'll give you an update on the injuries, but it ain't looking.

[Ethan Klein]

It ain't looking good. This is not a guy who's on death's door. You know, I think he's just doing a little shtick. That'd be crazy if he did that. About to die. He's like, yeah, guys, about to die. Anyway, check in later. What kind of meds did they give him going out? Maybe that's the whole issue. Yeah, it's a good question. Spiraled out of control. So Then the following morning, somebody tweeted, tweeted out and snapchat a message announcing his death. Huh? Just the next day. And this is by himself, his own account, which, I mean, that happens when people pass away their family members. Take. Because I said someone. Yeah, because it couldn't be him because he died. Of course that wouldn't matter. And mind you, this got 152 likes. The world, the world is watching. Yeah, it's just funny, no one really cared. I mean, I already know about it and I don't care, right? Monty Lopez will be remembered for his larger than life personality, his love for family and friends, and his ability to connect with people from all walks of life. Throughout his life, he cherished time with those he loves and worked to make a lasting impact. Through his relationships and experiences, he is survived by his children, family members and loved ones who will forever cherish the memories they shared with him. His legacy will live on through the lives he touched, the stories he created, and the love he gave. Celebration of his life will be announced by the family at an appropriate time. That seems like a genuine attempt at a death announcement, right? Honestly, him being dead would be the craziest twist in the story.

[Gabe]

My condolences.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, maybe. I mean, maybe, right? Maybe. So then there's a Snapchat of the same message. So somebody said in all of his socials, make sure everybody sees it, you know, and then the following. This announcement was on Wikipedia and Google stating his official death. So I mean, once again, looking pretty serious. Those Wikipedia people, they're on that shit. I swear, there's like a group of probably at least thousand people just waiting to report on someone's passing. It's so fucking true, man. Wait, it says he's alive. It says active.

[Gabe]

No, died.

[Ethan Klein]

See years active present. Well go out still active. I mean sexually still active in the streets. Died and active. They can't make up their mind, just like us.

[Hila Klein]

So what does active mean?

[Ethan Klein]

He means he's still got making moves. It's like, well, you're getting ahead of the story because I see you're googling his name. It's. It's basically when your career something going on. So if he's dead, it should, it should say 2026 Monty Lopez Lopez. Wikipedia, let's see. Because these guys know, right? They would know if the man's dead or alive. It says they removed his death date. You guys, you, you'll see why his ex. Here's some info about him just to give you guys some idea. He acted in a movie spy cat. In 2008, starred in the Snapchat series with Addison Ray. And then he signed to an agency. Oh my God, what a clout demon. With his ex wife Sherry Lopez is the father of Addison Rae, who's reportedly born before their marriage at a wedlock. Oh my God, man. Wait, they actually reported that? That's so funny. That's such a petty thing to add in there. This is from the article. Is Monty Lopez Addison's biological father? Strange. During the course of his social influencer career, he has worked with Walmart, Yogurt Land Bang Energy, and he only joined Onlyfans briefly before deleting his count. Well, this is really a pathetic Wikipedia. Only to reinstate it months later. I mean, like I said, the guy is just a total goon. Monty divorced his ex wife and mother of Addison Rae, Sherry Nicole Easterling. Following divorce, Monty's ex wife Easterling was involved in a relationship with rapper Young Gravy.

[Hila Klein]

I forgot about that.

[Ethan Klein]

With whom she walked the 2020 MTV Music Awards. That's when he lost his mind, I think.

[Nate]

That was so gross.

[Hila Klein]

That was so gross.

[Ethan Klein]

Mr. Gravy Lopez released a song titled Leftovers in response to the incident. That's disgusting. You're a grown man. Have some respect for yourself, sir. What's the mom.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Thank you for the 20 gifted, by the way. Cree. The virus.

[AB]

Shout out. Cree.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, that is so nice. Appreciate that. Thank you. Guys. I didn't see a fairy for that one, but.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

And Max, There was a fairy. There was a fairy.

[Ethan Klein]

I'll be your fairy.

[AB]

There was a fairy.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, let's see here.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Hyper fixation for 10 too, by the way.

[Hila Klein]

Oh my God.

[Ethan Klein]

Here they are. Dang, you fumbled the bag, bro. Monty, Where is she? And gravy. Mr. Gravy.

[AB]

Damn.

[Ethan Klein]

Here they are.

[Kate]

Oh yeah.

[AB]

I really feel for Edison.

[Ethan Klein]

Her. Both of her parents are just total goofballs. Yeah, the mom is going with young Gravy. The dad is posting the only fans. She's trying to be like normal like she seems. She seems like a relatively normal, not outrageous influencer. But her parents dragging her down and now her dad is dying. Come on, bro. Come on.

[Hila Klein]

I feel like, yeah, their family life behind the scenes must be such a nightmare.

[Ethan Klein]

So now this is why people are saying he's not dead. And let's see here. There was a no follow up or confirmation from family members or friends of his death for a couple hours until Monty finally instagrammed a story of a Drake called a Drake song called Shebang.

[AB]

Shebang.

[Ethan Klein]

I don't know what the. What is? Shebang.

[AB]

Shebang.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

It's like William Hyung. She bang, she bang.

[Ethan Klein]

Drake. Drake wrote that.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Oh, yeah, that was a Drake song.

[Ethan Klein]

She bang, she bang. Oh, she moved, she moved while she gone Like a shame and she streamed like a shang. Wait, so what is. Is this an inside joke? The shebang? No, he just posted it, I guess. I think he forgot he was.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

You know, he forgot he was dead.

[Ethan Klein]

You're supposed to be dead, man. So now Google and Wikipedia have removed the death note. Why did Monty do this? Why? It's unclear. Attention all sun rays. Oh, my God. Is that the name of their people? Sun rays? I don't know that. There's a huge Fortnite sunray crossover. That was, I guess, more my surprise with the collab. You know they collab with everybody now. Not me.

[Nate]

Nope.

[Ethan Klein]

I heard they were thinking about it at one point.

[AB]

They were. I got an inside person.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. It was a good thing they didn't. Honestly, for them, that's pretty bottom of the barrel. If they're gonna add me, Ethan Klein

[AB]

in fortnight, I'm sure there'll be some, like, fun custom game modes with.

[Gabe]

With you.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, yeah, I'm sure. Really fun. Bad empanada, maybe.

[AB]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Attention all sunrays. Addison is proud to announce a giveaway. Addison Chart is proud to announce a giveaway of Addison Ray's new Fortnite skin collab. Like and retweet this post follow. Yada yada. Wait, that's hers? It shouldn't really look like her, does it? It's more like Paris Hilton than Addison Rae.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah, that doesn't really.

[Ethan Klein]

That might be her brand now with her new stuff. Oh, so she. Let me see what she looks like. Addison Ray current. She looks. Oh, 50 gifty. 50 gifty.

[AB]

Loose.

[Hila Klein]

Oh, my goodness.

[Ethan Klein]

What a. What a nice guy. Thank you. I mean, no, she still looks like she. She still looks like Addison Rae.

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

So anyway, her dad, who we've talked about previously, continues to be a total jackass weirdo, and her mom probably had sex with young Gravy. Oh, my God. I mean, probably. Probably. Yeah. So that's all I have to say. That's pretty much all I have to say about that. Oh, the skin actually looks a lot like her. It's just a bad picture. Oh, yeah, that does look like her. The one on the left.

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

So you play Fortnite. Who in here plays Fortnight?

[Hila Klein]

I do.

[Ethan Klein]

So do you see her skin? Is it out yet?

[AB]

I may have just not known it was her.

[Ethan Klein]

You haven't even consciously.

[AB]

Not that I remember.

[Ethan Klein]

I can't imagine. If you're gonna spend money on Fortnite skins, this is the one you pick up. Do the ones they make over the years stay on there forever? No, they come and go.

[AB]

Yeah, they'll, like, go away for a while and come back. People are more likely to buy because

[Ethan Klein]

they're more rare Now, I don't think anyone bought this. I'll be honest. I don't think. Maybe one or two. Tough business call. So that's all I have to say about Monty Madison at Array? I don't know. Thank you.

[Gabe]

Thank you. I don't know. Do you think. You think you believe he's really dead? Just to be honest?

[Ethan Klein]

No, he's. He's not dead.

[Gabe]

Okay.

[Ethan Klein]

He's not dead.

[Hila Klein]

Such a bad thing to joke about. I feel like that's kind of like a line you don't cross. Okay, no, not you.

[AB]

Not you.

[Hila Klein]

Game?

[Ethan Klein]

Don't.

[Kate]

Hey.

[Ethan Klein]

How dare you cross a line into speculating if he's dead or alive.

[Hila Klein]

Gabe, not you.

[Ethan Klein]

Now we're kidding.

[AB]

She means people online, Gabe.

[Hila Klein]

I mean, for him to fake his death is crazy.

[Ethan Klein]

It is Monty. Is he dead or alive? Caller?

[Caller]

Hello?

[Ethan Klein]

Hello? Oh, my God.

[Caller]

Finally.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, how can I help you?

[Caller]

I have news to tell you, and it's very petty, and I have no one else in my life to share it with.

[Ethan Klein]

Great.

[Caller]

Like a year ago, I work at a big bank, and one of my co workers asked me out. I said no. He got really mad. So wearing Teddy fresh around the office, and he watches the sun, and he started telling everyone I was a Zionist at work.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, my God, what a scumbag.

[Caller]

For an entire year. And I talked to hr. Nothing happened. And he just got fired last week, and it was the greatest news ever.

[Ethan Klein]

What do you get fired for?

[Caller]

For calling me a Zionist. It finally went through. I just kept filing cases and I got people to back me up.

[Hila Klein]

And wow, what is.

[Ethan Klein]

What if sick?

[Hila Klein]

Like, I mean, it's so unhinged.

[Ethan Klein]

What a disgusting freak. And of course he watches Hassan. This is the type of toxic masculinity that he puts out into the world. He goes, oh, oh, she won't date you. She must. She must be a Zionist baby killer. What the hell are we going to do with our.

[Caller]

It happened when we were rock climbing, and he was like, right after I said no. Went up to our friend, like, well, I don't know if you know this, but she's a. She's a genocide lover.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[Caller]

What a loser show with all these Jews.

[Ethan Klein]

What a loser. Bro, are you Jewish?

[Caller]

No one to share that with, so. I was so excited. No, I'm not Jewish at all. I'm Italian.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, well, that's pretty close.

[Hila Klein]

Well, they say we look very similar.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, that didn't surprise me, but I'm glad we got his ass. Fire. Good for you.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Caller]

Yeah. Thank you so much. Wear my clothes at work.

[Ethan Klein]

God bless you. Thank you so much. I appreciate that. You be yourself and you wear those. Teddy Fresh. Proudly. Thank you for sharing that. And fuck men. That guy sucks. All right. Thank you.

[Caller]

Yeah, there you go.

[Ethan Klein]

You hear it? That's what. That's what Hasan's fans are like. Universally 100% of them. Our audience, beautiful, lovely women. Desirable, employed, attracting.

[AB]

Teddy's laughing at you.

[Ethan Klein]

What you laughing at back there? Yes. I'm so tired. I gotta. I gotta. We gotta be more responsible with our Norathian. Our time in Nora. I'm in the honeymoon phase of the game right now.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah, but what about our show?

[Ethan Klein]

You know, I mean, it's just become mostly a show about EverQuest, so. Kind of

[Hila Klein]

tired you are.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, Tom. And we were talking. There's a lot of people I've been seeing in the community that are saying they want to play. They see the vibrant community H3 community we have there. But they're waiting for the affiliate code.

[Gabe]

Good.

[Nate]

Have them wait.

[Ethan Klein]

I told them, don't buy anything.

[Nate]

No one play the game, including you.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, that's not right, is there?

[Nate]

Is it? Are you too far gone at this point?

[Ethan Klein]

I'm playing the game, Tom. All right, come on.

[Nate]

How about no free ads? Is that possible?

[Ethan Klein]

I'm not necessarily doing ads. I know the opposite. I told them, don't buy it. Don't do any in game buys, wait for the code. And people are listening. They're standing back and standing by.

[Nate]

No ads. You've literally talked about it on the show for hours. Well, you played it on the show.

[Ethan Klein]

It's a passion. It's a hobby. All right.

[Nate]

I did talk with them this week. I talked to him Monday, and it went well. But still do not play.

[Ethan Klein]

Not good enough.

[Nate]

Yeah, there's no money has exchanged hands.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Nate]

People do not play.

[Ethan Klein]

Nobody play except me and Dan and Grobo and. And Gabe lick Ds. Gabe, how you feeling over there on the couch, buddy?

[Gabe]

Feel comfortable and just learning the ropes of, you know, engaging subjects and stuff? Sometimes. Sometimes when you're like, you know, sitting down and it's just not my subject.

[Hila Klein]

Sure.

[Gabe]

You just surprised me. You Know what we're talking about? I'm like, hey, you got to keep

[Ethan Klein]

you on your toes. Yeah, yeah. We were talking about EverQuest. You know what that is, right?

[Gabe]

Oh, yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

What is it?

[Gabe]

It's like a. It's like a gamer. It's like trying to get free ads and all that stuff.

[Ethan Klein]

It's a game about getting free ads. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[AB]

Tom's life.

[Ethan Klein]

Tom's worst nightmare come to life. It's a horror game.

[Nate]

Do not play that game.

[Ethan Klein]

Here's by the way, everybody gathered in the common tunnels right now. Dan waiting for. Not that's Dan's character to log in and say, what up? Look at all these people. They're sitting in a ring. My God, look at these people. Horses, ogres, elves, dwarves, halflings, kitty cat characters.

[Gabe]

It's like a Shrekland or something.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, it is kind of Strickland.

[Kate]

Love that.

[Ethan Klein]

Shout out to all my homies out there in the East Common land tunnels. All right, let's talk about the title show of the episode. Asmin Gold gets banned on Twitch. What the heck? Asman Gold got banned on Twitch. That's crazy. What did he do this time? The last time he got banned, it was a big story. He said something to the effect of what did.

[AB]

Do you. You Palestinians are a lower class of people, basically, and doesn't feel bad for them.

[Ethan Klein]

Right. That this one's. Well, that this one's actually probably worse.

[AB]

I can't wait to see.

[Ethan Klein]

Have you not seen it?

[AB]

No, I haven't. That's actually kind of the joy of me not seeing all the stories ahead of time. I'm excited.

[Ethan Klein]

Are you going to get surprised here? So let's take a look. Yeah, this one's pretty. This one's pretty bad. So dexteros right on that. Asmongold has been banned on Twitch now again, banned on Twitch means absolutely nothing. Because I don't know why they say banned when they mean suspended. Banned means you're gone. Suspended means you're banned for a set amount of time. But they say banned when it means like you got suspended for a day. So they taking the whole meaning of banned and perverting it. Am I wrong? That's what banned means.

[Hila Klein]

No, you're not wrong in the whole platform is. To me, it's just so toxic, even the way they are now.

[Gabe]

How about. How about indefinitely?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, well, indefinitely means like with. Definitely. It feels like it means permanently. Right?

[Gabe]

Something like that. Sometimes indefinitely. And then it comes up. Okay, you're back.

[Ethan Klein]

Right? Sometimes they do come back.

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[Gabe]

I Thought it really means like forever and it means it kind of almost like temporary.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, yeah. But yeah, the whole. The way that they handle this on the platform is just so beyond pathetic. Like there's no opacity. There's no opacity. There's no, there's no explanation. They're just like, oh, he's banned and we're not going to tell you for what or why or how long. Am I right, love? I mean, you're, you're follow the Twitch culture, it's pretty ridiculous. The whole system there. It's all based on vibes. I don't know. Yeah, yeah, it's vibes. I think it's total vibe based.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah, I mean Hassan is an example of the vibes.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[Hila Klein]

Like he says, insane. And he never. Yeah, he might get every. Like once in a year I'll get like a 24 hour band.

[Ethan Klein]

No, I don't even think he gets that. It's the second band on his main streaming channel, Zachariah. Can't believe that's his channel name, by the way. It's Zack Ryer. Okay, so what did he do? Techtone in here in the comments says you should have supported terrorism. Then he'd be safe. I mean, honestly. Yeah, he would be safe if he did that. What happened? So Twitch has not made an estate official announcement, but the latest outrage, outrageous thing he said was about the migrant rush on the Moroccan Spanish border last week, which we haven't talked about, but it's pretty stunning what happened there. Do we have. Hang on one sec. So this. There's tons of footage in it. Absolutely. Kind of blew my mind without any of the context. But in Spain, they announced that they were like opening the border or they were loosening their immigration policy or amnesty policy. Thank you, Lena. And 60,000 people from North Africa came all rushing into Spain at once. They swam. You seen this footage? No, it's absolutely nuts. Wait, 72 people died crossing. Holy shit.

[Tom]

Jeez.

[Ethan Klein]

That I have not heard at all.

[Nate]

That's how Manny Lopez died, actually.

[Ethan Klein]

He was swimming. He was trying to. He was trying to immigrate.

[Gabe]

Wow.

[Ethan Klein]

So most migrants self deported back home. Yeah, the conflict, the New York Times conflict reports on why this happened. So there's economic unrest, limited jobs in Morocco, blah blah, blah. So. And then of course there's all these reasons. Economic unrest, shaky alliance with Spain, nationalism. Spain recently became much more open to immigration and far right. And Europe is pissed. So who is actually really behind this? You have 60,000. Thank you, Teddy. I'm glad I gave that to you.

[AB]

I'm sorry, I wasn't laughing at the story. I was like, maybe a bad call to give him that horn right now. Yeah, yeah, I hear him like all the way in the front of the office.

[Ethan Klein]

So when you have 60,000 Moroccans flooding in to Spain all at once and a mass migration spectacle, the question you have to ask yourself immediately is, who really is behind this? The Moroccans? No, the government. Which one? Which one, Gabe? That's the question.

[Gabe]

The dictator or the. Well, independent.

[Ethan Klein]

If you listen, if you are. If you are a real thinker, unfortunately, you would have known the answer. In fact, well, you don't have to think much. It's always Israel. It's Israel, guys. Israel sent 60,000 Moroccan immigrants to flood the borders of Spain. This is Alex Jones talking about it.

[Kate]

I did a report the other day and then we posted it on Exit Religious.

[Ethan Klein]

Bro, why are you even doing videos, bro? He. Look, he doesn't have a studio. He's just like in some fucking hotel room, motel room. His wife kicked him out.

[Dan]

What's up, guys? It's Alex Jones from the Motel 16. Yeah, the Jews sent all the immigrants across the border. It's crazy.

[Kate]

And it got flooded with Israeli bots.

[Dan]

And sorry about that. The prostitutes next door won't keep it down. They're affecting the audio quality of Infowars.

[Ethan Klein]

He can't even call it Infowars anymore. That's. That's Eric Werheim's show now, or Tim

[Kate]

Heidecker shows saying that I'm insane. I'm totally crazy to talk about Netanyahu openly saying last year during Midnight Hammer, this year, when Spain wouldn't authorize B2 bombers flying out of there, that he would work with the Arabs in North Africa, namely Morocco, to take over areas that Spain controls there and has had for hundreds of years and use that to flood Europe. There's news articles.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. Is Israel wants to flood Europe with Arab immigrants. We don't know why. I think I. Supposedly Israel is the ultimate evil. Anything could be attributed. And basically probably just to destabilize the world because Jews just want to destroy the world. And basically it's crazy. It's literally like exactly. Nazi anti Jew prop, like propaganda that you would hear during the Second World War leading up to it.

[Gabe]

Right?

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

There's one tweet, this whole thing, by the way, conspiracy, is one tweet NETanyahu made like six years ago that was retweeted by Candace Owens recently after this happened. So she put forward this. This theory based on one Netanyahu tweet from like six years ago and everyone's

[Dan]

like, yeah, it's Israel. There's no question about it, folks. Israel wants to destabilize Europe so that they could take over Europe. They want to colonize all of Europe. That's right. Jews are taking over, folks.

[Kate]

Their statements, their speeches of him. I played clips on the show and they said I was making it up. So I guess Israel didn't drag us into this war. I guess Israel isn't primary our leaders that are against the war. I guess Israel isn't bragging about AIPAC controlling Congress. I guess Israel isn't trying to merge our military and the Defense Authorization. Authorization act of 2027. No, it's. It's all happening. You guys keep lying.

[Dan]

He's just saying the defense contract in 1997 obviously proved that the Jews were underground with the Rothschilds and they were collaborating with France to bring about the Moroccan invasion of Spain. It's clear as day, folks. And for words dot com,

[Ethan Klein]

when you're

[Dan]

done reading about that, pick up my slot bucket there. Lace with carcinogic isotopes. Radioactive glows in the dark. Makes your glow in the dark, folks. It's great for emergency situations. It's made with rat and sawdust. Infowars.com.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh yeah, so of the. The candy's the. The author of this whole insane conspiracy. Did you know this? Oh, no, here we go now. It's. It's not enough. Did you know the Star of David is an occult BAAL symbol? It's a demonic symbol now. What she talking about? The pentagram. That's different. Used to be on the flag of Morocco.

[Hila Klein]

Oh.

[Caller]

What?

[Ethan Klein]

Oh my God. Before modern Israel existed. May want to look into that one, folks.

[Hila Klein]

Oh my God.

[Ethan Klein]

We discussed this in my Becoming Bridget series. Pedophiles would regularly go to Morocco with the express purpose of raping Muslim boys. Occult worshippers always harm children. Spain stay strong. The world knows what is happening and exactly who is behind it.

[Hila Klein]

Oh my God.

[Ethan Klein]

So wait, this is going somewhere really interesting. I promise. Some people are claiming the Moroccan government is openly cooperating with Israel. Blah, blah, blah, yada yada. So? So Candace Owens is obviously on some crazy shit and now it's being trickled down to Alex Jones. And wait till you see where this ends.

[Kate]

That's why Israel's losing the information war is the most unpopular country in the world right now. I didn't want to get up this morning and attack Israel. It was my listeners playing.

[Dan]

I didn't want to get up and attack Israel, folks. Infowars.com Pick yourself up an anti juice spray here at Infowars. It's made with silver solution, ivermectin and moss from the floor of my swimming pool. Infowars. Yeah, you take this. It'll keep Jews away from you 100ft. They disintegrate if they come too close. That's Infowars.com pick it up with your slot bucket today. I don't want to talk about the Jews, folks. The Jews, they made me do it.

[Ethan Klein]

Kate is fact checking. It's completely untrue about the Moroccan flag. It never had a star. David. It was the star of Solomon. All stars are the same if you go back far enough. Kate. Stars are all Jewish conspiracies.

[Dan]

That's Infowars.com Solomon More like salt Solo, man. Eve are Adam the first Jewish man's Infowars

[Kate]

about the Moroccan invasion of the Muslims. That said. Hey, weren't you covering this with Netanyahu? And I went and looked at all the clips and all this stuff and I'd forgotten about him last year threatening that.

[Dan]

You know what's more terrifying than the Moroccan flag? The American flag. 50 stars, folks, in forwards.com right? The Jews have taken over America since that civil war.

[Hila Klein]

It's actually everywhere. You just need to open your eyes,

[Dan]

look up to the sky. You see what's there. Stars. Infowars.com the Jews are taking over the whole universe, folks. It's dangerous. That's why you need anti juice spray. You can only pick it up [e-mail] Experience with holy water, shredded pages of the Torah and human excrement. Enforce.com cut with seed oil

[Kate]

and so I'll post a few news articles here and put some more links in. But this has been going on forever. They want to send the Gaza refugees, the US and Europe. This is crazy. So stop denying the Greater Israel project. Stop denying what's going on. Stop denying apac and stop denying that they threaten Spain with this.

[Dan]

By the way, I don't like you

[Ethan Klein]

don't look good, bro. He's like trip. He's like twitching out, taking from one twitchy guy to the next. He wasn't always like that. He's on some shit that doesn't surprise me. If he was though, he's on his own product. Frankly, he's. He's taking too much anti juice spray. It's going straight to his dome.

[Dan]

It's cut with lead. You want to. You want to take this Jew tincture keeps. The Jews awaits Got a little extra sweetness there. Cut it with lead, asbestos, baby food. Timflew, stop.

[Ethan Klein]

Dan. Who's doing the laugh track? Who's doing it?

[Hila Klein]

No, it's Nate.

[Ethan Klein]

Why are you doing that? You're doing something funny he's trying to break. Sounds like you're making fun of me when you do that. When I make fun of you, I'll do this one.

[Hila Klein]

Nate, you don't get the. The language here.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, my God, Zach. I am. You are not allowed to take time off anymore.

[Nate]

By the way, I was just thinking this is a great negotiation tactic for Zach. Like, you should use this footage.

[Ethan Klein]

Don't worry. He already does.

[AB]

He absolutely is. I can't get into any fucking program. I'm gonna go in through his computer.

[Ethan Klein]

He makes it hard to do this.

[AB]

Smart man.

[Nate]

Yeah, Job security.

[Ethan Klein]

I mean, he already has job security. He doesn't need to sabotage me.

[AB]

When I was playing them for an hour and you guys weren't hearing them. And then Dan comes by, goes, oh, the back is unplugged. So I don't know if that's part. Maybe that's part of the daily process. I don't know. But.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, you know what?

[Dan]

You know what it is, Ab? It's another Jew sabotaging an Arab man, Right? Another Jewish invasion. Infowars.com

[Hila Klein]

Nate, the crowd laughing. It's not actually a compliment.

[Ethan Klein]

No, it sounds like you're making fun of me. Not impressed.

[Kate]

Like the communist leadership of Spain. I like what they're doing, so get that straight. But also scamming the people of Spain who were invaded by the Muslims. It took hundreds of years to kick them out, so we need Crusades.

[Ethan Klein]

Two point that we took.

[Dan]

It took us so long to kick the Muslims out of Europe, and now the Jews are bringing right back in. Infowars.com we gotta get rid of all them folks. That's right.

[Kate]

Sovereignty, okay? And it's that simple. And it's Israel working with Hamas funding them.

[Ethan Klein]

What? What? Okay, now it's. What is it? Israel, Hamas, partnership to bring Morocco with

[Kate]

Al Qaeda to take over Syria.

[Ethan Klein]

Israel, Al Qaeda and Hamas have linked up to invade Spain with 60,000 Moroccan immigrants. What a. What a gambit.

[Hila Klein]

That kind of sounds like progress. If they're doing something together, that's cool.

[Ethan Klein]

Listen, if it wasn't terrifying, it'd be inspiring, folks.

[Dan]

Love to see them working together, but they're even more dangerous together, folks. That's why we got to take them out.

[Kate]

Now Trump says he may use Al Qaeda to go liberate Lebanon.

[Tom]

This is crazy.

[Kate]

I don't stand with Al Qaeda. The Muslim Brotherhood.

[Ethan Klein]

Brave take there sir Alex Jones. I do not stand with the Muslim Brotherhood. I do not stand with al Qaeda. Infowars.com Breaking political analysis

[Kate]

people. I still against Obama and the Arab Spring. All the rest of it. This is, this is, this is just the facts. I'm sorry. I know the region. I know the facts. Sorry. I told you the war wouldn't be won quickly and then they closed the straight over moose. You guys said it was in in four days. You guys were wrong. I was right. And this is killing our economy and destroying our chance of the midterms. And that's the facts. You're the guys that are just.

[Dan]

That's exactly why you need to invest in gold bars, guys. Infowars.com currency is going to be falling, plummeting. There's going to be societal collapse. Guys that buy gold bars at a great price [e-mail] put it under your mattress, buried it in your yard. This is the kind of security you cannot find outside of infowars.com. It's actually cut with a special blend of Brazilian beans. You can eat it in a pinch. An apocalyptic situation. You could spend it or eat it. Infowars.com.

[Kate]

Absolutely out of your minds. I'm not a panicking. I'm being a sovereign America standing up for what's right. And I'm proud of what I've done and I'm proud of being so accurate. Follow me on next right here at Real Alex Jones and on.

[Dan]

I'm proud of what I've done, folks. I've lost everything. I have nothing left. The family of Sandy Hook has taken everything. I'm proud of my work, folks.

[Kate]

Rumble.com forward/live.

[Ethan Klein]

And our new Wait, what's his new what's his new show called?

[Kate]

For what's right. And I'm proud of what I've done and I'm proud of being so accurate. Follow me on X right here at Real Alex Jones and on rumble.com forward slash Jones live.

[Ethan Klein]

The did he say Alex Jones show live? Yeah.

[Hila Klein]

So he's on Twitter and Rumble Rumble.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, of course. I mean listen, that's where he should be. Honestly, that's where he belongs. I enjoy it.

[Dan]

Follow me guys.

[Hila Klein]

He does look very pink.

[Ethan Klein]

No, he's tripping, bro. This guy's on some crazy lead based paint.

[Kate]

And our new news site that's exploding. Alex Joneslive.com Final Our new site is

[Dan]

exploding, folks, just like the Israeli bombs. They're coming From Rock for Spain, folks. They're going to be invading.

[Ethan Klein]

It's exploding.

[Kate]

Live show there, special reports and more. God bless you all.

[Ethan Klein]

All right, so obviously this shit's pretty crazy, right?

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

So of course, naturally Hassan is taking up this position that it's clear clearly Israel that's behind this.

[Tom]

Earlier you mentioned Morocco. What do you mean Israel caused that? Israel and America got the Moroccan government to send like 40,000 people into Spanish administered.

[Dan]

Hey, that's what I said. This guy's stealing my shit. Hassan, you're stealing my bit. Are you even selling gold? Solution that you can also eat in case of apocalypse.

[Nate]

Hey, is this his new fit? What happened to Chairman Mao? He's done with that.

[Hila Klein]

He said that old ladies find that attractive. He said it in a very vulgar way.

[Ethan Klein]

He still wears the Chairman Mao when he goes out.

[Nate]

That's his going.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Hila Klein]

That's the going.

[Nate]

This is around the house.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, yeah. He said, listen, I'm not. I don't. I don't like know how Morocco is said in Arabic. So I wasn't going to say anything, but he said it kind of silly, didn't he? Government too, that's how we say Morocco

[Tom]

now sending like 40,000 people into Spanish administered territory. It's not even on some conspiracy shit either. Like the New York Times is openly covering it.

[Ethan Klein]

Look at what he does.

[Dan]

He goes, it's not even conspiracy shit, folks. The New York Times is openly reporting this.

[Ethan Klein]

The New York Times reports Moroccan police urged migrants across into Sieta amid social media rumors of an open border, but does not attribute involvement to Israel or the United States. So you just flat out lying.

[Dan]

Yeah, I read the New York Times, folks, says Israel and US did it. Follow me at hasanpiker.com folks. Hasanpiker news live feedtracker.com

[Ethan Klein]

he's stealing his flow, bro.

[Tom]

Such. You know what I mean? It was so. It was a. It was classic Israel.

[Dan]

Classic Israel, folks.

[Tom]

In the. In the shameless way that they took ownership over it. That even.

[Ethan Klein]

It's so shameless, it's so brazen. You can read it in the New York Times. Didn't say it in the New York Times. Completely fabricated.

[Tom]

And the fucking New York Times was like, okay, well, now we have to investigate what's actually going on here, you know, Never happened.

[Ethan Klein]

Did never happen. There's no such article.

[Tom]

How is everything Israel? I don't know, man.

[Ethan Klein]

Good question. It's literally Israel derangement. Like there's enough shit to say. It sounds so stupid when you're just like, yeah.

[Dan]

Got a ticket at the red light this morning. The cops send the police. Israel sent the cops to trail me.

[Ethan Klein]

It's like, really? Israel got you a ticket for going through a red light?

[Dan]

Oh, you have no doubt. When you look into the facts, it was clearly Israel.

[Ethan Klein]

Really Israel? I mean, isn't there enough to, like, criticize them for and to talk about and we don't need to talk about, like, silly conspiracies, do we?

[Nate]

That's what happened when I ran the stop sign.

[Ethan Klein]

It's Israel.

[Nate]

Totally Israel, bro. It wasn't my fault.

[Dan]

I don't know if you noticed, but there's. There's stars on the police car. Looks like American flag, but there was a covert Israeli. It starts with David, folks. Infowars.com you can get these [e-mail] they're sewn with the pubic hair of Jesus children. Keeps them away.

[Ethan Klein]

It's a scent.

[Dan]

Keeps them away from us. Keeps us safe.

[Tom]

It's not my damn fault. New York Times said Morocco did it, but did they say Israel told them to? No, they didn't, but Israel took ownership over it.

[Ethan Klein]

When? When did that happen? Wait, he just said he read it in the New York Times? Yeah, and then he says, well, then someone was like, the market. The New York Times says Morocco did it.

[Hila Klein]

New York Times openly reported it.

[Tom]

So I'm skeptical that Israel and the US Got more.

[Ethan Klein]

This is so stupid. Like, if he wants to criticize Israel, he really waters down his, like, criticism by. By including these just such silly fucking ridiculous conspiracies. Like, just keep it to the shit you actually know. You look fucking dumb as hell. Doing this.

[Tom]

Morocco to do. Seems like something Morocco did on its own. Really?

[Ethan Klein]

I don't even understand the theory. Why is Israel and America masterminding to send Moroccan immigrants into Spain? Like, what's the explanation even? It doesn't even make sense. Like, Israel's got enough shit on their hands. They're not coordinating. Fucking yeah. Even his audience is saying it's crazy. Which, you know, that's bad.

[Hila Klein]

That's.

[Ethan Klein]

That's bad.

[Hila Klein]

That's bad.

[Ethan Klein]

That's a tough situation.

[Tom]

Morocco has done us in the past. Never to this degree. And not only that, but also they were doing it while American envoys were there. They were doing it after the American government literally signaled that they want Morocco to do it. Come on, dude. Israel also posted about it. Like, Israeli envoys posted about it.

[Hila Klein]

Oh, posted about it? Really?

[Ethan Klein]

I don't even know what that means, but it sounds pretty even if I take My face value sounds pretty weak.

[Dan]

Yeah, they tweeted about it. Israel government tweeted about it. Obviously they did it.

[Tom]

That's a stretch. Are we doing that? That's a stretch. We're doing that. Like, this isn't like, Israel killed Charlie Kirk. That's a fucking ridiculous conspiracy. Which, again, if you want to believe that, fine. I don't. But this is. There are varying degrees of engineering that takes place when it comes to foreign policy. Different tools, different pawns. I don't know if Israel had much to do with this. They'll take advantage of it. But Morocco has done this before, independently, I know, but never to this degree. And America directly had an involvement here. Okay, this is yet another circumstance where Israel and America are aligned because they have the same opposition, they have the same international enemies. It has a lot to do with Spain's relationship with Algeria and. And it has a lot to do with Spain's attitude against America, against NATO, against America's actions in Iran.

[Ethan Klein]

So Spain is an American adversary, which I did not know. And so America and. And Israel attacking Spain by invading them with immigrants. Is that. Am I understanding that right? That seems. That's great. So the reason I'm showing this, anyway, America directly had involvement based on nothing. Yeah. So. And the reason I'm showing you this is because Twitch is so cooked. They have the extreme prop. They're just festering an extreme politics. Right? So on the left you have Hassan, who's just literally doing anti Israel, Alex Jones level of conspiracies now their conspiracy theories, right? And then on the right you have Asmongold getting real spicy with it. And then not one normal ass person on the whole website who's just like, let me read the New York Times article. So here's what Asmin Gold's take was. You're wondering how he comes up with that. He reads it on Twitter. He reads it from tankies on Twitter.

[Hila Klein]

The way he just throws stuff like, oh yeah, America already has been involved. You know, New York Times already openly reported it.

[Ethan Klein]

You know who else is like, why

[Hila Klein]

are you talking about.

[Ethan Klein]

You know who else is reporting that Israel did it? The young turks, Tucker Carlson, Alex Jones and Candace Owens. So what quite a illustrious, illustrious crowd you've hitched your wagon to there, bud. Anyway, Asmongold actually as a insane take as well here, he says, just four minutes, I'll just play it. I haven't shown you the clip I want to show you. So people haven't actually have some context of what they're talking about. You said it's in here, kid. I don't see any clips of the, of the, of the immigrants running in. It's quite insane. The clips are really shocking. 60,000 people all at once. Yeah, they're like swimming.

[Hila Klein]

They're just like running from the ocean into inland.

[Ethan Klein]

It's like some medieval type of like freaking. It's like some kind of crazy water invasion. So here you can see and I guess the city is pretty small. It's like a city of 60,000. So their population like doubles immediately. Oh, here. There's no audio. Oh, Pretty stunning footage. Like so obviously it's going to be fodder for anyone who's trying to spin a narrative. There's. Everybody gets to use this, right? Like the ant that the anti immigration people get to use this somehow Hassan and his elk have figured out how to use it, you know, but when you see something scary and concerning, you can count on the political extremists to hijack it. There's a whole. Can you guys send more like, I don't know what's going on here. You said 2A. I mean there's just nothing here. I don't know what you guys are looking at, if I'm looking at the same thing. At any rate. Yeah, I want to look, show more context before I show asthma Gold's response. Just to give all the context here. All right, I'll, I'll Google it. Moroccan. Let's see. 80 people died crossing. That's crazy. That's, that's awful. You don't hear about that. Here's a compilation and officials say at least 72. Most have gone home, but some still

[Tom]

remained on the beach. This morning, CBS News international reporter Aiden Stretch was reporting on the ground in Ceuda and he. We actually spoke to that young man now eager to return home to Morocco

[Ethan Klein]

after learning that he would not be allowed to move on to Spain's mainland.

[Tom]

And Aidan, this all took place in Spanish territory in Africa. What's been the fallout in mainland Spain? Well, Spain's government now has to do a couple different things. The first is to make sure that the crisis continues to be contained to Ceuta. So there's still about several thousand people there.

[Ethan Klein]

The military is continuing to comb the

[Tom]

streets for them to return them back to the border. They've also begun construction on a 500 yard seawall to make that swim from Morocco to Ceuta harder. But they also have to continue to

[Ethan Klein]

find out what the root cause of this.

[AB]

Here, look,

[Ethan Klein]

I can say I've never seen anything like this in my Life. Apparently, most of them have gone back. The Spanish government, although they have, like, some new policy about refugees and immigrations. They were like, not like this. So a lot of them were sent back or returned. I mean, who knows how many people are still there?

[Nate]

But do they make them swim back or do they.

[Ethan Klein]

Like, where do they get back in the water?

[Nate]

Get the out of here.

[Hila Klein]

I wonder, too. Like, how did they go back?

[Ethan Klein]

Probably send them on buses. I don't know. Or someone probably got in the water and swam their ass home. I know at least one guy did.

[Hila Klein]

That's so crazy that it's actually a swimmable distance. I had no idea.

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Apparently it's like. I don't know how long it is, but it's like a mile or two, so it's definitely doable. And it seems like pretty chill water, too.

[Hila Klein]

Wow.

[Ethan Klein]

I could have done it.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

I could swim that warm, beautiful, warm ocean water. Yeah, I'm sure it's.

[Gabe]

They can do that and come back.

[Ethan Klein]

This could have been, like, a really fun, wholesome event. Yeah. Everybody, we're doing a swim.

[Hila Klein]

Why is it a bunch of dudes, too? Like, they're all young, male. What? What is it?

[Nate]

Well, it's probably hard for old.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, I think it's probably. If they're all swimming. I feel like that appeals to young men.

[Hila Klein]

I can swim.

[AB]

Yeah.

[Gabe]

This is.

[Ethan Klein]

I don't. I'm sure there are some women.

[AB]

This is not Spain. It's Spanish territory in Africa.

[Dan]

Got it.

[Gabe]

Just clear.

[AB]

Yeah.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah. I am really not familiar at all with.

[Ethan Klein]

Although I don't know if it's like, I don't know what the laws are like in Morocco, if women can.

[Hila Klein]

Oh.

[Ethan Klein]

Mingle in this type of way. I don't. I have no idea how conservative their government is.

[Hila Klein]

Kate said there's no work, so that's why it's all men. They're looking for jobs.

[Ethan Klein]

Spanish territory in Africa. So they wanted to come here and migrate to Spain. Here it is on the map. So it's a Spanish city in Africa. And I guess a lot of them, when they realize they won't be able to migrate to me, mainland Spain, we're like, all right, I'm swimming home. That was fun. I'm swimming home. So anyway, that's.

[Gabe]

That.

[Ethan Klein]

That's Hassan's take. Now let's look at as Asman Gold's take. Let's see here. And people don't know for sure why he was banned, but a lot of people are guessing it was because of this. And, I mean, they're almost certainly correct about that.

[Tom]

Shoot them. Problem solve.

[Ethan Klein]

It's quiet. Why is it. Oh, here.

[Tom]

That's what I would is shoot them. Problem saw. That's what I would do. That's what I think they should. I think they should just shoot them. Like I've said this before. Like I know that it might sound like, oh, well, you shouldn't do that. I have no sympathy for. For doing that. And I would do that in a second because it's the right thing to do in the long term. You can never look at it.

[Ethan Klein]

Pretty wild, eh? Tom's laughing.

[Hila Klein]

I am.

[Nate]

You know, I'm looking at him too. He kind of looks like a poor man's Jared Leto a little bit.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, that's so interesting.

[Nate]

I don't think I've ever really.

[Ethan Klein]

Or I don't think poor man even comes to describe what's going on there. But interesting. Yeah.

[Tom]

In a very, very isolated incident, you could say. And there's always this. This is emotional blackmail, right? Well, you can't. These people, they have kids with them. Well, then don't bring your kids. If you don't want to get shot, then don't bring your kids. It's really simple. You mean you'd shoot adults and deport the kids, right? Well, I'd shoot whoever. Yeah, I'd shoot whoever. I mean, if it's kids, women, men, anybody, just shoot him.

[Gabe]

I don't really believe he's, like, human.

[AB]

No, he's not. Well said, Gabe. Well said, Gabe.

[Ethan Klein]

Subhuman trash. He does look somewhat ghoulish. And maybe he's just played World of Warcraft so long, he started to look like an actual ghoul. Eh? Yeah.

[Tom]

They gonna stop coming over, I feel like.

[Hila Klein]

Because if I feel like asthma, Gol really needs, like, something like Westw World, you know, like that show, the HBO show. He would love it. Just go. Just shoot whoever you.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, you want him.

[Hila Klein]

It feels like he has this energy, like he just wants to leave the, like, wild west.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, I think if he actually did, though, I think at home and whatever state he's in and be like, yeah, oh, yeah, they should all be mowed down.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

But he doesn't live there. He doesn't.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah,

[Ethan Klein]

he hasn't. He just. It's still an insane thing to say, right? Even with the separation of time and space.

[AB]

Yeah,

[Ethan Klein]

but that's really bad advice, I'd say. I would just say in general to the government. I probably think that probably would. Would backfire.

[AB]

There's a level of seclusion that you have to, have to feel comfortable saying shit like this.

[Ethan Klein]

I mean, that's a wild thing to even admit to. Yeah, yeah, because it's obvious you're gonna get probably banned and just. I mean, bro, there's no way. You just look fucking crazy, dude. And violent too.

[Hila Klein]

That's what I was trying to say. Like a lot of violent energy is what I'm hearing.

[Ethan Klein]

Like, what about build a wall? Like they said Spain is building a sea wall. Can we do that before we start mowing down children? I mean, that's what America started doing with the speedboats. We just shoot in speedboats. So I guess he's getting his way in that way, that regard. But I don't think Americans would be down, even the most conservative of them. If we just put machine guns up on like the southern wall and just mowed down anyone close to the wall, that might be what we call an incident.

[Tom]

You don't do that. They'll use children and women as shields to get themselves over and then they'll put more women and children at risk because they know that they can use them.

[Ethan Klein]

You kill the children and women to save the women and children.

[Hila Klein]

It's a long term plan that he's got.

[Ethan Klein]

I mean, he kind of has. Like when you learn about Ivan the Impaler.

[AB]

Vlad.

[Ethan Klein]

Vlad the Impaler, Yes. He used to impale soldiers while they were alive through their asshole and out of their mouth. But it wasn't because he liked, he was sadistic. It was because he wanted to send a message. He didn't want to do it to more people. And that's why he did it.

[Hila Klein]

Oh, yeah. Okay. So it's a way to help.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. He would set up fields of thousands of, of impaled soldiers. So when you had to, when you marched to him to invade.

[Hila Klein]

I've never heard this story.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, it's so gruesome. It's crazy. So when you marched to attack his, his territory, you had to march past literally thousands of impaled ass through mouth, many of them while they're alive. It makes sense when you think about it. From Vlad the Impalers pov, you know what I mean? You have to ask yourself more often, what would Vlad the Impaler do

[Caller]

in

[Ethan Klein]

this day and age? I believe it's important.

[Tom]

It's collateral so they can get more of themselves over. That's the way it works. That's the way an animal thinks. And these people are animals.

[AB]

Who's the fucking animal? I guarantee you, you smell worse than them.

[Ethan Klein]

Who swam however long I Mean, that's almost certainly true. That is almost certainly true.

[Gabe]

Foreign.

[Hila Klein]

It's just so shitty. Like, why does he need to go this.

[AB]

Because it's just like that. It's white privilege. Just, like, full display.

[Ethan Klein]

I feel like. I feel like. I hope he's, like, talking to a therapist.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah. Because I agree. It seems like he does this all day, so he's probably every day, like, radicalizing himself further and further. Like, he's just on Twitter all day.

[Ethan Klein]

But they're not animals, right? They're poor and they're looking for jobs, which you would probably do. I mean, you must. Anyone would do that if they were in the same conditions. Yeah, anyone. You ever seen Aladdin, Street Rat? I don't play that riff. Yeah, whatever. You think Aladdin and Abu are animals? No, they're here.

[Gabe]

Abu.

[Nate]

Wait.

[Ethan Klein]

That's the monkey, right? Yeah, he is an animal. He's. Yeah, good point. Fair. Maybe not the best analogy. Literally, a monkey. Yeah, you're right. Okay, you know what, Nate?

[Dan]

You're right.

[Ethan Klein]

Asmong has a point. Well said.

[Tom]

Savages. Absolute savages. Hamas tactics. Yeah. Terrorists. Of course. You don't want to do that.

[Ethan Klein]

There is other footage that I believe he's probably reacting to, which is there's 60,000 people. So there's a lot of people, but there's footage of people, like, rioting and breaking and just making a mess and trying to rob grocery stores and stuff. Again, you're 60,000 people. So obviously there's going to be a lot of hooliganism amongst young men. I think he's probably reacting to more extreme footage that I didn't show you guys, but. Oh, thank you. But, yeah, it still doesn't change my opinion on today.

[Tom]

Just saying doesn't mean you want to do it, but you have to do what you need to do in order to enforce your borders, man. Like, that's the way it is. People are too emotional to see that. Yeah. I mean, like.

[Ethan Klein]

But it's Spain's border. I mean, isn't it up to them how they want to enforce it? Kill them. You got to kill all of them. Spain's like, I don't want to do that. Spain. Did you forget to ask somebody before you made your immigration policy as win gold? Okay. Is saying on Twitter there's a lot of old, unrelated footage being tagged as the invasion. Interesting. I could see that, too. Yeah. People like to do that a lot.

[Tom]

Like, again, like, it's you, don't you. You can't make decisions that way. And I understand the way That I talk about. This might be a little bit extreme. It might be a little bit.

[Ethan Klein]

We love self aware, King.

[Nate]

A little bit.

[Ethan Klein]

No, I appreciate the self awareness.

[Gabe]

Listen,

[Ethan Klein]

I'm aware I might sound a little crazy, but I just want you to know I really mean it. Even knowing that I am fully aware of what I'm saying. And I just want everybody to know that I truly, truly mean it with my whole heart and a calm and rational mind.

[Tom]

This is my belief, you know, unemotional. I wish we had more people like me. I do. I wish we had more because we got too many.

[Ethan Klein]

What? Booger? Bloody booger walls. Listen, we do not need more bloody booger walls. More showers, less booger walls. That's my. I'm running for office. That's my slogan.

[Tom]

That are too worried about the optics of something rather than the reality of it.

[Ethan Klein]

The reality, really, even optics. Things just kill. You're talking about killing children with a gun. Excuse me, But if they can't eat, I can. They're hungry

[Tom]

of it. Is that if you allow people to use kids as a shield to come over, they're going to use kids as a shield to come.

[Ethan Klein]

Were there even kids involved?

[Hila Klein]

Now?

[Ethan Klein]

How many kids swam across the channel?

[Tom]

Over. And that's going to cause a net increase of child exploitation, a net increase of child suffering. And it's better to just say nobody.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, how'd they get there, Dan? Didn't they swim?

[AB]

They use the kids as jet skis.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, that makes sense. I thought they swam like Napoleon, But

[Tom]

he can come over and shoot anybody. Then try to create winning solutions.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, it's a very short swim. I just saw a lot of them coming out of the water. Some walk, some swam.

[Tom]

Solutions for these people so they can take advantage of them by further exploiting those groups of people that you think you don't want to shoot.

[Ethan Klein]

Son, I'm going to impale you through the ass and out of the mouth. But trust me, it's for your own good. This is important. You're going to save a lot of children by being impaled up the ass and out of your mouth. That's Vlad. Now listen, son, I want you to know this isn't personal. Doing this to save lots more children down the line. Going to impale you up the ass and out of the mouth now. But I want you to know I'm doing it for the very best reasons.

[Tom]

That's just how it is. You say you shoot kids. Yeah, yeah, no, that, that's. I mean, I mean obviously that's What I said, right? I mean, like that, that's. That's clearly like. I mean, I mean that, that's like. I don't know why, like, why would you repeat it to me as if I didn't say it? That's literally exactly what I said. That's the reasoning for it. That's my logic. That's exactly what I would do. And I wouldn't even have any. Any question for it.

[Ethan Klein]

So angry. Like, this is like really. It's very like them. And the very. He's like, yeah, I fucking said that shit. Said kill children.

[Nate]

Is there a Mrs. Aspen Gold?

[Hila Klein]

Oh, good question.

[Ethan Klein]

Actually, he did, I think, get a girlfriend recently.

[Hila Klein]

Show her Tom. That was a big news.

[Ethan Klein]

Really?

[Nate]

She's super hot.

[Hila Klein]

Yep.

[Nate]

No, she's not.

[Hila Klein]

Yes.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, I don't know if this affects your opinion, but Asthma Gold is worth like at least $50 million and counting, I'd say. But that would.

[Nate]

Hila. Would that turn a woman off that you want to kill kids?

[Ethan Klein]

I mean, I think she's down from what I saw. I don't think she cares.

[Hila Klein]

I think there's all kinds of women.

[Ethan Klein]

I mean, Hitler will fell in love.

[Gabe]

It's insane.

[Hila Klein]

He's very successful, so a lot of people agree with him.

[Ethan Klein]

Tons of success.

[Hila Klein]

A lot of people.

[Kate]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

You could get mega clouded up by dating him. I'm not saying. Listen, I don't know.

[Hila Klein]

I mean, she probably agrees with him. Yeah, a lot of people agree with him. Just look at the numbers here.

[Ethan Klein]

What do you think?

[Nate]

Do you think I don't want to comment on a woman's appearance, you know?

[Hila Klein]

Okay, so.

[Nate]

But to say not. She's pretty for me.

[Hila Klein]

Oh, she's pretty, but pretty beautiful.

[Nate]

Yeah. For him, I mean. Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

What?

[Nate]

He's punching way above his weight.

[Ethan Klein]

It's objectively very beautiful.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, you got something for me? Oh, yeah. Here. This. This would went viral like last week or the week before.

[Tom]

A knife.

[Ethan Klein]

Here she is over his place.

[Tom]

And where is it?

[Ethan Klein]

Wait, your fridge is very clean.

[Tom]

Yeah, it is. Of course it's clean.

[Ethan Klein]

It's the only place he doesn't store and use in any way at all. God, he just needs to go bald. You know what I mean? Just needs to get rid of that thing.

[Hila Klein]

Totally.

[Ethan Klein]

No, never mind.

[Tom]

No, it's not.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Is that a cockroach head?

[Ethan Klein]

That's a cockroach head.

[Hila Klein]

Oh, my God.

[Tom]

Yeah, actually it is.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay, you know what?

[Hila Klein]

Oh, my.

[Ethan Klein]

I genuinely lost my appetite.

[Nate]

The funny thing is I would watch this reality show.

[Ethan Klein]

I think I would.

[Hila Klein]

Oh, my God in the fridge.

[Ethan Klein]

Jesus Christ, man.

[AB]

He's saving it for later. He already ate the body.

[Hila Klein]

Gross.

[Ethan Klein]

I just don't know why. If you're as rich and successful as he is, just have someone come clean your fucking house. Why do you want to live with filth and fucking corpses? Because he's a little.

[AB]

To be honest.

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

It is mental illness.

[Gabe]

It is.

[Ethan Klein]

I mean, mental illness.

[AB]

Mental illness, or he doesn't want someone going around his house.

[Ethan Klein]

I think it's the hoarder thing. Because what's the difference? The hoarders are scared. Crossover Big, big Venn diagram.

[AB]

Yeah.

[Hila Klein]

I wonder if it's also, like, not wanting to move on and, like, still seem like this relatable guy that people are watching, you know, like, not like he's, like, committed to an image, and it's like, yes, I'm still that person.

[Ethan Klein]

I think he's probably a hoarder. And this is his childhood home. I know he was close with his parents, and they both died. It was very public. I think he's got some. I think the guy could probably benefit

[Hila Klein]

from some therapy, you know, therapy is beneficial for everybody.

[Ethan Klein]

So I see you had a cockroach head in your face. Do you want to talk about that?

[Hila Klein]

Why is it.

[Harley]

How did you know that?

[Ethan Klein]

How did you know that? There's a little thing.

[Tom]

The pointy. Yeah, no, you're right. They actually. Oh, my God.

[Ethan Klein]

Are you gonna leave it? I wonder if he's just gonna close the door, right? He's just gonna close the door. Watch.

[Hila Klein]

Is it just the head? His thoughts?

[Ethan Klein]

Yep, you're right.

[Tom]

Give me.

[Ethan Klein]

Yo, this girl's a trooper, bro. That is crazy business.

[Nate]

I would tune in, I'm telling you.

[Ethan Klein]

I, I, I, I kind of agree.

[Nate]

Is the cockroach there? Next week.

[Ethan Klein]

And Tom knows good reality tv.

[Hila Klein]

Pitch it to Bravo.

[Ethan Klein]

We got to get Andy Cohen on this stat.

[Nate]

That's right.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. The Real Housewives of Asmongold.

[AB]

The real cockroaches.

[Ethan Klein]

Asmongold's hoarder house.

[Caller]

Pineapple.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Because.

[Nate]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

You just closing the door, baby. Yeah, he's closing the door. And they're both moving on. Oh, my God. Neither of them is moving on or they're both moving on.

[AB]

Is he gonna show the head?

[Hila Klein]

Oh, he took a picture.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, it looks like he is,

[Dan]

girl.

[Ethan Klein]

You know what? As his girlfriend, if you want to step up to that role you got, or actually, you know, he probably doesn't let her. I'm gonna say call some cleaners in there.

[Hila Klein]

Oh, yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

He doesn't let her I mean, people

[Hila Klein]

tell him to do that, like, every week. He's clearly against it.

[Ethan Klein]

They can't see it.

[Hila Klein]

No, we don't want to see it.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Okay.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, my God. That's fucking gruesome, bro. It's bigger than I thought.

[Gabe]

No.

[Ethan Klein]

Why is it ripped in half? I think you might be right, Ab. I think he ate half of it and saved the rest for later. That's the only plausible explanation for why there's half a cockroach in his refrigerator.

[Hila Klein]

God, I.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, get away.

[Tom]

I gotta get myself a knife.

[Ethan Klein]

And that's incredible that this guy's.

[Nate]

And she. Dude, she looks cute. Like, the other picture look weird, but, like, that makes it even more, like, entertaining.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Nate]

Like, what.

[Ethan Klein]

That's intriguing. Like, what is happening here?

[AB]

Yeah.

[Nate]

Like, in the bedroom. Like, aren't you curious what goes on? Like, I. I am.

[Tom]

Come on. I'm. Pull one more up. Keep the kids, deport their families. What do you think the kids do? The kids grow up and they resent you for supporting your family.

[Ethan Klein]

He's doing the like. And Toyo, Montana and Toyo.

[Hila Klein]

Based on what?

[Ethan Klein]

You killed my father. I've come from revenge.

[Hila Klein]

Based on what is he saying that I like? I mean, he's just talking about how immigration is here. Because here I don't see that kids grow up and resent you saying.

[AB]

Because it doesn't matter. It's just.

[Dan]

It's in.

[AB]

It's in. It's in their DNA. That's what I'm saying. No, he's saying they're gonna grow up to be evil.

[Ethan Klein]

Saying if you kill their parents, they're gonna grow up and want revenge.

[Hila Klein]

No, I think he said deport their parents.

[Ethan Klein]

No, he's talking about killing them all. Wait, let me go back.

[Hila Klein]

This ch.

[Tom]

The kids sports.

[Caller]

It.

[Hila Klein]

It's on this.

[Ethan Klein]

No, he said kill the parents, deport the kids. And he's like, no, you got to kill the kids, too. Otherwise they're going to be pissed off.

[Tom]

And I wouldn't even have any. Any question for it. Come on. I'm going. Pull one more up.

[Ethan Klein]

Just like Hassan, his audience is pushing back. You know, they. They've both gone too far. Yeah, they both gone too far.

[Tom]

Keep the kids, deport their families.

[Hila Klein]

See? Keep the kids, support their family.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, that's bizarre. That's a. That's like a weird thing.

[Hila Klein]

And he's saying the kids are gonna grow up.

[AB]

Yeah, he's saying you can't.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, I mean, that is weird. To deport just the parents and keep the kids. That Is weird.

[AB]

Yeah. I mean, if he. If he gave that reasoning. But he's. What's he about to say? I think.

[Tom]

What do you think the kids do?

[AB]

Yeah.

[Tom]

The kids grow up and they resent you for supporting their families.

[Ethan Klein]

They resent you for deporting their families. Turn the terrorists and turn into terrorists.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Nate]

That's why you got to kill him. Duh.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[AB]

That's what he's.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, but I kind of. You should have deport them all together. Why separate the.

[AB]

No, absolutely, you shouldn't separate them.

[Ethan Klein]

That whole plot, the whole premise is kind of weird. Well, son, we have to kill you, otherwise you'll turn into a terrorist in 20 years. Trust me, it's for your own good.

[Tom]

No, you present a very specific scenario, just shooting into a crowd. And now there happen to be kids to.

[Ethan Klein]

To.

[Tom]

Of course, because that's the reality. Because if you have kids in the crowd, then kids are going to get killed in the crowd. Then you're going to use the emotional weight of the kids getting killed in the crowd as a justification to not shoot the crowds. But you think that shooting the crowds is the correct option, which means that you would be okay taking the risk of healing the kids, which means that killing the kids is somehow acceptable, which means that doing that is not a big deal. And you'd be okay with it as well.

[AB]

He should be like a negotiation negotiator in like a hostage situation at like a bank. Because if he just talks, I think the guy might just blow his own brain.

[Caller]

Like the.

[AB]

The. The robber or whatever will just be like it.

[Ethan Klein]

He laid it out pretty clean. I mean, he's right. If you're okay just shooting randomly into the crowd, then you're okay with killing kids. But I think people aren't. I mean, you don't have to think past that part because I think most people disagree there. Even your own audience, a lot of them, which is good. It's nice to see we have to draw the line somewhere.

[Hila Klein]

You know, it just sounds like fantasizing about violence. And it's like, to me, it's very privileged because you got to grow up here.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[Hila Klein]

And not actually live it.

[Ethan Klein]

That's kind of what I mean. He's like, here he's. He's neither nor Moroccan living in poverty, or Spanish people who are trying to deal with a complex immigration.

[Hila Klein]

But actually, like, here you get to live beautifully with immigrants that are part of the culture. They're part of everything. You know, they totally. I mean, I love everybody here, and I just. It just seems like, fantasizing on a violence. Like, like, I don't get.

[Ethan Klein]

I think there's also like a huge echo chamber that gets them all fucking riled up and crazy. Like the same that Hassan has like a tanky.

[Hila Klein]

Right.

[Ethan Klein]

Echo chamber on Twitter. Twitter's the worst thing that ever happened to society.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

And just by the same, asmongold has like a ultra, ultra neo nationalistic, anti immigration echo chamber that gets them all worked up. And so when Eisenh Gold opens Twitter, he probably sees a bunch of immigrants, like, burning, breaking, doing horrible things, whatever, and it may not even be from this current event. And then when Hassan opens it, it's all about Israel did it. And I don't. It's hard to understand how it's. It's just Twitter is just getting people all insane.

[Nate]

Do you think when they're sitting down at dinner, like, asmongold talks about mowing

[Ethan Klein]

down babies down with anybody at dinner?

[Nate]

No, it's girl like. Or wouldn't it be funny if he actually, like, talked about the new Addison Ray album or something?

[Ethan Klein]

Like, I think they probably. I think if anything, they probably do talk about mowing down babies.

[AB]

You think that's different?

[Nate]

Don't you think he's talked out by the time dinner rolls around, he wants to talk about.

[Ethan Klein]

No, I think she's down. Well, he does politics. That's his thing. He's not. That's mainly what he does now. Yeah.

[Hila Klein]

He plays video games for hours. Yeah.

[Nate]

Like, don't you think, like, it's like a hooker doesn't want to have sex when she's, like, not working? Like, don't you think he wants to talk about something else?

[Ethan Klein]

That's a good question.

[Harley]

I don't know.

[Ethan Klein]

Like, maybe he talks about World of Warcraft over dinner.

[Nate]

That's what I'm saying. We're like, yeah, yeah.

[Hila Klein]

He's a gamer, so, yeah.

[Nate]

Hunter IO everquest.

[Ethan Klein]

Everquest. He talks about everquest at dinner. That's what I talk about at dinner.

[Tom]

How the sausage is made. Because you don't want to feel bad about the outcome. But the reality is, is that any way that you logically deduce this reality, you will immediately come out with bad behavior. Do you understand

[Hila Klein]

what bad behavior is he seeing here? Because he lives here. This is his lived experience.

[Ethan Klein]

I'm okay. He's saying to stop the immigration, you have to do bad behavior.

[Hila Klein]

Or if you let them in, you're gonna see they become bad behavior is what he's saying.

[Ethan Klein]

Let me go back.

[Tom]

You just create a human shield defense.

[Kate]

Of course.

[Tom]

All I'm saying is don't pull the kids aside and shoot them if you had a choice. I don't think they should pull them aside.

[Ethan Klein]

He's like, I'm giving you an off ramp, man. Just don't kill. Just don't mow down the children. If, let's say in hypothetically, you can separate the kids from the parents magically, and then you don't have to kill the children. He's like, nah, killing the kids is a non negotiable. Exactly. Come on, man.

[Tom]

No one wants to feel bad about the outcome.

[Dan]

Well, of course.

[Tom]

I mean, like, yeah, actually I don't care about feeling bad about the outcome at all. I care about feeling bad about that.

[Ethan Klein]

I hypothetically, of course,

[Tom]

did the wrong thing.

[Ethan Klein]

I don't know why I'm hearing Brucey, but I don't know from where. Oh, he's. It must be on your mic. Kb.

[Tom]

This is the kind of guy that falls hook, line, and sinker for the Hamas propaganda because he can't see past kids. It's so sad. Man is honestly so sad. The amount of people that are emotionally captured by this.

[Ethan Klein]

I think it's sick that he's risen above being emotionally captured. What if we could somehow separate the adults from the children and only kill the adults and then we can at least save the children?

[Dan]

No.

[Ethan Klein]

Line them all up. Even if we could separate them. There you go. So that's pretty wise. Yeah. So. So people assume he's getting banned for that, which I feel like it has to be that.

[Hila Klein]

Right?

[Ethan Klein]

I mean, and that pretty much catches us up on that story. So I don't. I don't know. Does anyone know for how long he's been banned? If it's a permanent. Is it What? I don't know. Twitch doesn't say. It's so stupid.

[Hila Klein]

I mean, even when they call it permanent, they still reverse it.

[Caller]

It.

[Hila Klein]

Right. Like, wasn't that the case recently?

[Ethan Klein]

It depends. They do whatever they want. Yeah, they do whatever they want.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

I mean, anytime they ban Hassan, they do it like on Sunday for one day, which he doesn't work. They literally, like, time it out for him. It's pretty interesting. Yeah, that's a good point. G says he's got Asmin. Has more sympathy for the dead rats in his house. But then the immigrants. I need to run to the bathroom. And then we'll come back and we'll check in on. Is Harley calling in for that?

[Hila Klein]

Yeah, we should.

[Ethan Klein]

Why don't you bring. I'm gonna go to the bathroom. We can set that up then. Capish? All right, I'll be right back.

[AB]

Shebang.

[Ethan Klein]

Gabe, how you doing? What do you think about that? Should we kill children?

[Gabe]

I don't think so. The children's the future. Why kill the future?

[AB]

Well said, Gabe.

[Ethan Klein]

Fucking genius. That's honestly genius. You're killing the future.

[Gabe]

That's what it is. Basically killing the future.

[Ethan Klein]

And where are we without the future?

[Gabe]

Nowhere. Literally, basically nowhere.

[Ethan Klein]

Gabe, everybody.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

This episode is brought to you by Facebook. So you were scrolling on marketplace and there it was, the bike you'd been searching for. You sent a message and it turned out the seller was super chatty, kind of funny, and an avid cyclist. The next thing you know, you're in a cycling crew. Well, a community cycling group. The thing about Facebook, you might find more than what you're looking for from a browse to a bike ride this summer. Find more on Facebook.

[Gabe]

Bathroom break. Where's the commercials? Where's the ad?

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Have been super chatting. Thank you so much to all of you. Officer Butt Baby said. Oh, when you walk by every night Talking sweet and looking fine I get kind of hectic inside Baby, I'm so into you Darling, if you only knew all the things that flow through my mind okay, thank you very much, Officer Butt Baby. Noah music says first time donating question. Why didn't Lindsey Graham call them his supreme warts? Because he was in the legislative branch, not the judicial. Judicial. That's why. Nicole Taylor. Shout out to the frog pit family in eq. Shout out spooky Kabuki Asmongold. Invading my hobby with his army of toxic fans is not what I want for my community. The great unclean one himself getting banned makes me feel good. Zinch wills it. Family, Family, family. I'm not sure what hop are you talking about? 40k you get in 40k. That's terrible. If so, yeah, that's bad news. Thank you, Spooky. Zach R said if Dan would get his act together, Ethan would be able to start on time. I don't think.

[Ethan Klein]

I don't think so.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

I. I get here at 8am so I'm. I'm generally pretty ready to go by. By the start time. Nucalator. What's an ogre gotta do to get a Gabe Emote? Justice for Gabe. Do we really not have a Gabe one? I thought we had a white claw. Gabe Emote. Am I wrong?

[Gabe]

I don't know.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Am I wrong?

[AB]

I'm checking.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

I'm looking over him right now. Maybe not. Okay, well, we'll have to take Care of that. It's a lot of competition for these spots, though, you know what I mean? But we'll do what we can. Thank you, Nuka. Later, Sam Kerkishol.

[Caller]

Now

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

for Tom's daughter's Jeep fund. They donate $5 for your daughter to get a Jeep. Tom, what do you have to say about that? He's gone. He's gone. Joshua C. Walsh said she was nominated for Best New Artist and performed at the Grammy. He's actually super talented. This is talking, of course, about Addison Rae.

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Ethan doesn't. He's not, like, really aware the world. You know what I mean? Like, what's going on?

[Ethan Klein]

He's more out of touch now. Because of EverQuest too.

[AB]

Yeah.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Yeah, it's worse than ever. Yes, she's quite popular. Played a Coachella too, right?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, Headline.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Maybe not headline, but she was like, main Stage at Coachella. Hila, Is that a new teddy? Fresh shirt. And are you dropping that?

[Hila Klein]

No, it's an old one.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

That's an old one.

[Ethan Klein]

Valentine's Day one, right?

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

And then they follow up and say, are you dropping that star shirt you wore the other week?

[Hila Klein]

That was a sample.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Yes, that was a sample.

[Hila Klein]

We will at some point.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Hey, there you go. Derek. Derek. You none said get on EverQuest Loser. Well, who's the loser now? Because he's not here to hear that message. Mel donated $5 and has no message. Blank. Thank you, Mel.

[Hila Klein]

Nice.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Sarah said downloaded EQ last night and started learning the rope. So far, so good. Smiley face. Well, according to Tom, you're not supposed to do that until we get our ad sponsor. So you can charge that back on your credit card. That would be. That'd be swell, but have fun. Celia said, I have been trying to update to a VIP member for so long, but I can never figure it out. Even on desktop. It won't let me upgrade. I just cancel my membership to upgrade and nothing. Help. Help. That's a weird one. I. I don't know. It won't let you. Are you sure you weren't already a vip? I don't know what that could be. Sounds like a bug. But she said even on desktop. Contact YouTube support. That's the best I can offer. Or perhaps you live in a country that has different rules. Donated in American dollars though, so unlikely. Well, sorry I couldn't be more help, but good luck to you. Jennifer Claire said, I want you to know that the Great Wolf Lodge is running ads on your show. At first I laugh, but then I was mad. They're messing with you guys get them. I love you all. It's probably Auto. It's probably the algorithm. Because we've talked about Great Wolf Lodge so much. It probably is like, hey, we should slap some of those on here.

[AB]

This channel really likes Great Wolf Lodge.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Garrett Connors says, does Tom know? Tame Impala is just one guy. Tom.

[Nate]

Kevin Parker, bro. Shut. I mean, how dare you? How dare you even ask me that? Of course I know who Kevin Parker was.

[Ethan Klein]

I think it's because in the past you say, I like them a lot or you themselves.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

The royal, then.

[Nate]

The royal we.

[Gabe]

Right.

[Ethan Klein]

The royal them.

[Nate]

I know who Kevin Parker is. Shut the fuck up.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Whoever asked me that, go easy on Garrett Connors, dude.

[Nate]

Garrett Connors, go fuck yourself.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

He paid.

[Hila Klein]

Hey.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Paid 10 Australian dollars to send that message. Okay, we appreciate that. Aarya Rajendra. Rajendra H3JR's podcast when. As a mom of a 5 and 3 year old, it was so great to see kids in the studio. If Teddy wants to do a podcast, you should plan a kid's show, have him wear a fun mask, and teach us about his favorite dinosaurs. I. I mean, they're not my kids, so I can't speak on that, but.

[Hila Klein]

No, it's not happening.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Yeah, that's what I was gonna say, but I didn't want to overstep. But, yeah, I don't think that's happening. Thank you, though. It is. It is nice every once in a while to have them in here.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Chelsea. Connor said I was pregnant with my first baby the same time Hila was pregnant with. With Teddy. And the same with Bruce with my second. I can't believe our babies that made us mommies are seven.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah, I know. Seven lately is. It's getting really big.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Seven is almost 10, and 10 is almost 20.

[Hila Klein]

No, no.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

My daughter's birthday is tomorrow. Family. Well, thank you, Chelsea.

[Caller]

Nice.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Love. Stopping scalpers to actually gift these cards to kids is wonderful. That's like Batman and Santa combined. Bata Sandman.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah. You know that Teddy and Bruce, they did go to one of those in the grocery stores and they were saying how everything was sold out.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, yeah.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Oh, yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

The scalpers got him first.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Always sad times, sad times. Lyric here says, hi, love. You said, hi, love. Hey, J. Kepi. With a $50 donation. Hey, family. My girlfriend has just had a book release today. It's Unmoored by Delilah Jade. It's about a girl that escapes an insane asylum and meets a siren. It's a gothic romance, and I think the book girlies would really like it. All Right. Well, Jake, kepi, you donated $50. That's about what we charge for ads on this here podcast has. Right, Tom? 50 bucks.

[Nate]

Exactly.

[Dan]

Yeah.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

More true. Area Stone said, ordered my whisker cat litter robot today. That's what I'm talking about.

[Ethan Klein]

That's what we're talking about.

[Hila Klein]

Nice.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

The A discount is nice going. And they said they'd post a review to Reddit as well.

[Hila Klein]

Wow.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Got out. Marlino said, lol. It's Tom and Zendaya. Are we saying Gabe is in?

[AB]

I don't even know what that means,

[Ethan Klein]

but it made me laugh.

[Gabe]

My gosh.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

I don't know what that that was. That was sent a while ago, so I don't know the context, but Carlos said randomly take one or two pics without them, so your height is drastically different. Oh, I think we read this one.

[Ethan Klein]

I know what he was talking about.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

The shoes.

[AB]

I know what it means. When Tom and Ethan were standing together and either Ethan was taller, Tom Holland in Zendaya because she's taller than him.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Oh, he interpreted it very good.

[Kate]

Very good.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Steve Mann said, why not have David do sound bites when Zach has off? Well, David's working the night shift tonight. He doesn't come in until, you know, an hour before the end of the show. Or something like that.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

But thank you for this. Maybe someday. Bree said, I had a dream last night and you were all in it. I poured cans of beans on Dan's head. Mods banned this person. If you could suspend their account, please. Thank you.

[Ethan Klein]

Sounds like a fetish thing.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Hi, Inley. Got here a few. I only got here a few minutes ago, so I guess I missed a few things. Why is Ethan slowly losing his sanity and developing multiple personalities? We've all been asking that for years at this point. Well, wondered the same thing.

[AB]

EverQuest this week.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Yeah, his EverQuest. Jesus Christ had dreads. So shake them. I ain't got none, but I'm planning on growing some. Imagine all the Hebrews going dumb, dancing on top of Chariots and turning tight ones who tell me when to go. Go up, bald head.

[AB]

Tell me when to go.

[Ethan Klein]

Tell me when to go.

[AB]

You know that song?

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

No.E40, but they modified it into. Into a bald head reference. I see. Careful, careful. You know who you're talking to? Dr. Bluntman420 said, I can hold a shovel with my butt cheeks. Assad. That's from Dr. Bluntman 420.

[AB]

Nice. That must be his unique talent from earlier in the app.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Oh, maybe. Yeah, maybe. Shannon Cusick said, can I get a Disney World review from the boys.

[Ethan Klein]

Maybe later.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

They're all gone. Everybody's gone. There's like, three people in the room right now.

[Ethan Klein]

Are we here today?

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

I don't know. We weren't supposed to be here today.

[AB]

That means all three of you better. All three of you better hype up this video right now. This better be the funniest video you've ever seen.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

The Shambhala video.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[AB]

We don't have Zach here.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

I'll hype it up.

[AB]

I need. I need some sound bites from your guys.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Well, he wouldn't be playing sound bites over your video. Yeah, the video. The video stands alone.

[Ethan Klein]

Also, Dan, I have some breaking news.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Hit me.

[Ethan Klein]

Wonka 2 starring Timothee Chalamet has been delayed indefinitely. Oh, they're calling it off. Delayed indefinitely.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Indefinitely. Like the way asmongold's banned indefinitely kind of thing. Like, it'll probably still happen or.

[Ethan Klein]

I hope it'll still happen. I think everybody hopes it'll still happen.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Avery said it's so depressing. Dude, it's not depressing. Who cares about this Wonka movie gives a shit? No one. You're the only one, Avery. You're literally the only one.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Me too.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Okay, there's two of you. There's two of you, then.

[Ethan Klein]

Pocs love Wonka, baby.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

That's. Is that the case? I didn't realize he was so popular. And he.

[Ethan Klein]

I mean, sounds like he's just being Avery, right?

[AB]

I. Yeah. I'm 50. 50 on it.

[Ethan Klein]

Pick your side. Wider pocket.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

I'm not. He's saying, watch it, Dan. Fuck no, dude. It looks stupid. I'm sorry. I'm sorry to rain on your break. I'm not trying to be a hater, but you're forcing me to be by this insistence on stanning this bizarre fucking movie.

[Ethan Klein]

You're too white for it anyways, Dan.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

I'm too white for it. I'm too white for Wonka. I'm not like, oh, you liked it too?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, with Timothy shout outs up.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

You just like it. Because as Timothy Chalamet and he's in Dune and anything related to Dune you're into now.

[Ethan Klein]

It's like Dune. I can see or walked in on a very important conversation.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Yeah, well, we had to fill the time while you took a shit for 20 minutes.

[Ethan Klein]

I did not do that. I was.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Well, what took so long?

[Ethan Klein]

I was doing bath.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Between what I was doing math or doing math. We're, like, taking a bath.

[Ethan Klein]

I just took a bath.

[AB]

Relax.

[Gabe]

All right.

[Ethan Klein]

Hey, caller. How can I help you?

[Caller]

Hello?

[Ethan Klein]

Hello?

[Caller]

Hi.

[Ethan Klein]

Hi. How can I help you?

[Caller]

I just.

[Ethan Klein]

I started EverQuest the other day and it's a lot of reading. Oh, you don't have to read. I don't read anything.

[Caller]

Okay.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, it's.

[Caller]

It's.

[Ethan Klein]

Look, okay, I'm not. I don't want to sound like I can't read. It's just a lot of small text. The text is small. You know, I think they're. They're doing something about the small text, right? They're doing 4K scaling or something. Yeah, yeah.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Are you using a 4K monitor, caller?

[Ethan Klein]

Hey, guys, it's me, not Ryan.

[Caller]

Sorry. Hi, I'm Max.

[Ethan Klein]

What just happened?

[Hila Klein]

What's happening?

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

What's happening?

[Ethan Klein]

We're mid convo. Yeah, we're mid convo.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Started talking about some. Some.

[Ethan Klein]

His name is Matt. He's not Ryan.

[Caller]

Yeah.

[Dan]

All right.

[Ethan Klein]

Should I hang up or do you actually want. All right, take care.

[Tom]

No.

[Ethan Klein]

All right, well, Dan, go ahead. Dad's trying to talk. Dad is trying to help you, and then you start talking about. Your name is not Ryan.

[Caller]

My bad, my bad.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

It's all good. Are you using a 4K monitor, my friend?

[Ethan Klein]

I don't think it's 4K. Okay, laptop cringe. Sorry, I don't.

[Harley]

I don't have.

[Ethan Klein]

I don't have a 4K monitor either.

[Tom]

That's.

[Ethan Klein]

I just got a Steam machine. Is it Ste. All right. Oh, yes. Thanks for calling.

[Hila Klein]

He called the Steam Deck a Steam machine?

[Ethan Klein]

No, no, there's a new thing called a Steam machine. Oh, it's a console Steam Deck. Wait, I tried to get it, but it's.

[Gabe]

It's.

[Ethan Klein]

Ethan's gonna.

[AB]

Wait, I think he was saying not Ryan because he's like, oh, if it's the account, I'm thinking of like a long time viewer. That's why he was saying who he was.

[Ethan Klein]

He says he's not Ryan.

[Nate]

I'm not Frank.

[Ethan Klein]

His name is.

[AB]

I'm not getting it.

[Nate]

So stupid. Shut the up.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, my God. Well, listen, he's a. He's an elite member of our community. I wouldn't go that far, but I did have to dump the call.

[Nate]

Good call.

[Ethan Klein]

Keep it up, man. Keep playing EverQuest, you're gonna love it.

[Hila Klein]

By the way, I totally agree with him. I can't stand reading in games.

[Ethan Klein]

I don't. I. Listen, I'm not a reader.

[Hila Klein]

What are we doing here?

[Ethan Klein]

Are you guys want to watch me play EverQuest or you want to do Shambhala?

[Hila Klein]

Shambhala and Shambhala.

[Ethan Klein]

You didn't even have to Think twice about it, huh?

[Nate]

Shambhala.

[Ethan Klein]

All right, here we go. So, ab, you want to introduce what we got here?

[Tom]

Yeah.

[AB]

I'm waiting for Harley to join, but Harley took me to Shambhala. He's been talking about Shambhala forever. This music festival that's supposedly insane. I've never done anything like this. And he was gonna show me the ropes. We had some difficulties we had to deal with because you're not allowed to record there. A lot of people don't like being on camera. We had to maneuver around certain things, but we got something.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay, so.

[Hila Klein]

And this whole thing originated from Harley's picture that became kind of like a big. In our community. That picture.

[AB]

Yeah. And at one point. What's crazy? And I had this thought while I was Hyde. I saw him, and it's in the video. I captured it on. On camera, but there's a point where I opened the door and I saw him this exact face. I started cracking up. But, like, the eyes going every. Cause I've never seen Harley's eyes go off center, but it was every. It was.

[Ethan Klein]

What drug makes him do that?

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Molly.

[Hila Klein]

Really?

[AB]

No, he's not.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Well, I don't know for sure, but I've. I've seen that face many times. Let's just put it that way. Something about it makes people turn into fucking Tom York.

[AB]

I think you. I think it was. Was ketamine and acid.

[Dan]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, yeah, that'll make.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Ketamine.

[Ethan Klein]

That'll make. That'll make your eyes go crazy.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

I'll do it, too.

[Ethan Klein]

So. So tell me you went there. So tell me about the traveling. Tell me how long you were there.

[AB]

Yeah, so I went. It's my first time traveling internationally, even though it's Canada, which was really cool,

[Hila Klein]

which I find so shocking.

[AB]

I know I was. I don't know. It was a mix. I was, like. I was, like, really excited, but a little depressed, too. I'm like, man, how I. How have I not traveled? And then, like, I think it was like the third day where I was, like, on coke and I was like, oh, I didn't travel because I was broke. That's why, like, it took me.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, America's. So. It's. It's expensive to travel abroad in America.

[AB]

Yeah.

[Nate]

So big.

[AB]

And it's like, now that me and Lena aren't broke, anytime we travel, we just go home. You know, we're just visiting family. So it was fun.

[Ethan Klein]

Time is the timeless problem. When you don't have time, when you have plenty of time, you got no money. When you got money, you got no time.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Come on. Where we at? Work with me. Time and money.

[AB]

But yeah, so we travel. I traveled to Vancouver and then we got an rv and then we drove for like eight hours. We got to Shambhala and then we stayed there for like four. Four or five. Four days, I think.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[AB]

And then we had to come back.

[Ethan Klein]

And Harley knows we're expecting him, right?

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Yeah. You should be hopping on any second.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

He said thanks when I sent him the link.

[Ethan Klein]

So you guys. And then also you had a co pilot.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

There he is. He's coming on.

[AB]

Yeah. A gentleman named Tyler.

[Ethan Klein]

Big tie, big tie dog who looks like he's high, but he's actually sober.

[AB]

Yeah. Yeah. Surprisingly, I didn't know that.

[Ethan Klein]

Sober as a gopher, one might even say.

[AB]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Harley back. There he is from Shambhala. Wow.

[Hila Klein]

I've already watched it, so it stuck in my brain.

[Ethan Klein]

What a beautiful apartment, Harley. What a nice. What a nice upgrade. Where are you living at these days?

[AB]

He's still connecting the audio, I believe.

[Ethan Klein]

Does he not know Harley? All right.

[Kate]

He.

[Gabe]

He.

[AB]

Shambhala.

[Hila Klein]

Is he still recovering?

[Nate]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[AB]

I had a toll on both of us in different ways.

[Ethan Klein]

Hello.

[Dan]

Hey.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

What's going on?

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, hey. Nice apartment.

[Harley]

Thank you. It's pretty cool, eh?

[Ethan Klein]

It's beautiful apartment. You got the penthouse there.

[Harley]

You bought it.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, right. So we're. We're just kind of setting the. The premise here. How would you describe Shambhala?

[Gabe]

Super.

[Harley]

Super cool. Very cool. Honestly. Secret.

[Tom]

Secret.

[Ethan Klein]

A little bit.

[Tom]

It's hard.

[Harley]

It's hard to get to. It's not easy to get to.

[Ethan Klein]

You have to really want to be there.

[Harley]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's also. It's on. It's on private land. Like, it's some. We're at someone's home. When we're at Jambala, it's their home.

[Ethan Klein]

Really.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Yeah.

[Harley]

It's a farm.

[AB]

Someone's home who's like, okay with you doing coke or whatever, wherever you want.

[Harley]

In fact, if you don't, they beat the out of you.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, really? So that's why.

[Harley]

Yeah, they send out all their. All their sons and brothers come out and they beat the out of you.

[Ethan Klein]

So it's.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

That's cool.

[Hila Klein]

Is it really at somebody's land? What do you.

[Harley]

Yeah, yeah. It's a private. It's a private farm. Even when you get the. Like there's. There's normally like. Like a hundred cows or something on that land and they. They take them all off and.

[Ethan Klein]

And they get rid of Somewhere.

[Harley]

No, you can find some. You can see some. See some. Some dung pies. 100%. I warned AB about it, actually.

[Ethan Klein]

That's a dangerous setting. Well, so it's a.

[Harley]

Wild turkeys. There's wild turkeys there.

[Ethan Klein]

I wonder.

[Hila Klein]

That's kind of cool.

[Ethan Klein]

I wonder if people tripping.

[Hila Klein]

I feel like if I was high, like having animals around me would be cool.

[AB]

If I saw a turkey, I would try to eat it.

[Harley]

No, they're furious. I saw one, like hitting his head against the car. His own reflection on a car. Oh, it's probably crazy for him. He's like chilling all year and then for three days, 20, 000 people are there and he sees like cars and maybe he hears music and stuff.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Well, driving.

[Harley]

It's gone.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Yeah. Driving animals to the point where they're smashing their own brains out. It doesn't seem very.

[Ethan Klein]

Like pieces fighting for himself for territory. He sees a. He sees a formidable. In his reflection and. I'm gonna beat it.

[AB]

Another thing we had to deal with is there's like five. There's like. There's like five stages blasting music continuously. So it was. It was tough to get audio too. At some point. Like, I felt like the best audio we had was Harley's glasses because they were right above his mouth.

[Ethan Klein]

But yeah, they actually.

[Harley]

And actually it's. It's become a bane of. Of the festival. People don't like the metaglasses, right? They don't like it.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

That doesn't seem to be limited to the. To the festival. That just seems to be. They're like, creepy.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, they need to get more covert. They. You know, everybody knows about them now.

[AB]

Well, they're not co. Yeah, I mean, they have like this big. Like, it makes a loud sound and then like it has a glow, like constantly flashing when it's recording. So it lets people know. And if you try to cover it, it does. It stops it from doing it.

[Ethan Klein]

So that's the least.

[Harley]

That's the least it could do, though. That's a good thing.

[AB]

Yeah.

[Harley]

Sue you if you turn that off now.

[AB]

Yeah.

[Harley]

If you disconnect the. Because if I cover my light, it won't record.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

And then. Yeah, and Mark Zuckerberg will sue you.

[AB]

He.

[Harley]

He literally goes on because there's earphones. He comes in, he's like, I know what you're doing.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

He's watching all of the feeds of every metal glasses all around the world at all times.

[Ethan Klein]

So Shambhala is a music festival. It's like electronic music and it's very. It seems like, people are kind of spiritual and hippie that go there. Like a Burning man type of vibe, but, like, less.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Less but on private property.

[Ethan Klein]

Private property. And how do you buy tickets to get there? How do you. How do you get access?

[Harley]

I say I'm on the H3 podcast, like three months ago, put in a huge appeal. I shared your numbers. I had a whole pitch document that I tricked Tom into sending me once. So that's how we got the RV spot.

[Caller]

What?

[Kate]

Wow.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Really?

[Harley]

I'd be bothering you, but I gave them Love's email. They might be bothering you guys about posts and wondering why. Why you haven't been posting it on your socials like you said you would.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay, that's no problem if they hit us up. Yeah, but how do people, like, for a normal person, just. What, What. What does a normal person do to go to Shambhala?

[Harley]

Well, what's crazy is half of the tickets are bought at Shambhala.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay, good.

[AB]

You buy for next year while it's going on.

[Harley]

You buy next year, next year sells out.

[AB]

And there was like a long.

[Harley]

At the festival.

[Hila Klein]

Whoa.

[Harley]

And then they. They release the tickets later on for everyone else. But if you want to secure yourself, you get it there.

[Ethan Klein]

Ah, so that's clever. So how much is a ticket?

[Harley]

I think it's like 600 to 900, depending on which round you get it. You know, they have like tier one where they send a. Sell a bunch, and then tier two, like a bit later, and then tier three.

[Ethan Klein]

It's just about. It's the same ticket. It's just a matter of timeliness.

[Harley]

Yeah, every. Every ticket is the same. Like, there's no vip.

[Ethan Klein]

Is it actually hard to get an RV spot?

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

If we.

[Kate]

We were.

[Harley]

We were in the artist section because.

[Ethan Klein]

The artist section.

[Harley]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, they're artists.

[AB]

That's how we met.

[Harley]

Like, have the DJ them. Yeah. Convince them that Age three podcast is art and that we've heard it.

[Ethan Klein]

Don't you.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

You are a con man for the centuries, my friend. If you convince them of that.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, no.

[Hila Klein]

What do you mean?

[Caller]

Still.

[Ethan Klein]

He's still riding the epic mealtime coattails that still has some clout in these organizations. Barely, dude. Barely, dude.

[Harley]

But your age three is that little spark.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, that's it. Is it bad? You know, ab. What were you going to see?

[AB]

No, he's.

[Kate]

He.

[AB]

He was very popular, actually. Every. We would stop like a restaurant alongside the road and people knew who he was from.

[Ethan Klein]

Epic meal time.

[AB]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, But I mean, a lot of.

[Harley]

A lot of. Yeah, everyone knew Age Three, but age three. It's like if a girl was approaching

[AB]

us is age three.

[Harley]

Yes. If a man stunk and was walking towards us, it was one of mine.

[Ethan Klein]

Aren't our audience the best? That was crazy. Like, you take the calls. It's like 80 women.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

And God bless them.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah, they're the best.

[AB]

The first fans that we met, they're

[Harley]

farting in my discord. Sorry.

[AB]

The first fans that we met were, like, this really nice couple. And they were like, showing me, like, this Shambhala tradition. They're like, you're supposed to hold hands and like. I forget what it was, but, like, she, like, gave me a bracelet. I was like, oh, that's so sweet. I looked at the bracelet and it said piss or said, I love piss or something. It was very nice.

[Harley]

With yellow.

[AB]

I wore it. Yellow beads.

[Ethan Klein]

That's not. Not romantic. I mean, it depends on your partner. That's true.

[Hila Klein]

That's good. They found each other.

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

No, no, no.

[AB]

They were a couple.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[AB]

And she gave it to me.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[AB]

Okay.

[Ethan Klein]

It's probably hers, but she probably loves piss.

[AB]

Oh, but they probably both of them love piss.

[Ethan Klein]

You wanted to be Plur.

[Hila Klein]

You know they love piss together. Yeah, ideally.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, ideally. I mean, I guess one person could love piss and the other one not, but I don't see that relationship working out.

[Harley]

Yeah, well, everything's a discussion.

[Hila Klein]

Okay, sure.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. Everything's negotiable. Gabe, have you ever been to. Have you ever seen Epic Meal Time?

[Gabe]

I don't think so.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[Gabe]

Never experienced it.

[Ethan Klein]

You ever heard of Shambhala?

[Gabe]

Shambhal? I just heard about it now.

[Harley]

Dude, you would love both of these things. Gabe, I only know you from the couch, but you would love this shit, bro. I don't know.

[AB]

Do you like the party, Gabe?

[Gabe]

I like the part just hanging out, enjoying eating and stuff.

[Ethan Klein]

He likes to rage. Gabe's a drinker, right?

[Gabe]

I only drink. Like, there's people around.

[Hila Klein]

Like some, like, social.

[Gabe]

Like, social. Social kind of stuff. I don't, like, drink like, every day.

[Hila Klein]

Do you like to dance?

[Gabe]

I love dancing. To, like, music I like.

[Hila Klein]

Okay.

[Gabe]

But when I get tired, you know, I just like to chill and listen to the music and stuff. It's not like when I'm young. When I'm young, you know, I like to enjoy myself. When I'm old, I just kind of, like, settle in. Unless there's some music I like, I'll just engage into it.

[Ethan Klein]

Like, you like strippers?

[Gabe]

Strippers. Oh, yeah. It feels good, baby.

[Ethan Klein]

It feels good, baby. Yeah. Let's Fucking Go usually get strippers on your birthday, right?

[Gabe]

I think I like to go to Vegas on my birthday this year.

[Ethan Klein]

And can you. Are they. Can you touch them or is it just looking?

[Gabe]

I think it's more like. I think I could. It depends on the company. And the stripper? Yeah, if it's. If it's a company where you can do whatever you want. I like to touch, but if it's a.

[Harley]

No, no, Gabe. We could touch him in where I live. Gabe, you can stay on my couch.

[Ethan Klein]

Are there rules to the touching? Is it like, yeah, you can touch her, or is it, like, touch gentle? I don't know. What's the rules?

[AB]

Yeah, like you said, depends on the company or what the girl is comfortable with.

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

So do you establish the rules? Like, front? How does that.

[AB]

I'm sure they tell you my expertise aren't that deep.

[Ethan Klein]

Have you. Did they ever coach you? Be like, hey, you can touch my titties, you can touch my ass, but don't touch my face. Like, I don't know. Is it like that?

[Gabe]

Something like that. Depends if. If they're comfortable with it, but if not, I'm cool with it.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. Yeah. And how much does it cost to get a stripper to your house?

[Gabe]

I don't know. I never.

[AB]

It's his present. He doesn't pay.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, you don't. All right, well, hey, let's all learn together. Gabe is about to learn a whole lot about Shambhala and maybe about epic meal time. You ever heard of a bacon weave?

[Gabe]

Bacon weave?

[Ethan Klein]

No, that was Harley's thing. He. He would weave bacon.

[Harley]

I did a little more than that. That's like 20 of what I did.

[Ethan Klein]

All right, anywho, let's. Guys, let's jump right in, roll it to Shambhala Kaba. So what should we do? Should we just play the whole thing and then talk?

[Harley]

You shouldn't. You shouldn't.

[Kate]

You know what?

[Tom]

You should.

[Harley]

You know, I was thinking you would

[Hila Klein]

probably want to pause and talk throughout.

[Ethan Klein]

I might take forever, though. What were you gonna say?

[Harley]

You know, you know, do whatever you

[Ethan Klein]

want, but obviously I know that.

[Harley]

Yeah, for sure, for sure. But remember, I, Like, I told you. I was like, yo, Charlie messaged me. And then. And then you went on the show. You did, like, an impression of him and stuff and said, he messaged me and everything, you know?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, I don't.

[Gabe]

I don't.

[Harley]

Like, I don't message him anymore now, you know, maybe, you know, and that's cool. That's fine. But I, like, if don't say. Don't be crazy, dude, because I. I don't want to have to not go to Shamba Shambala next year.

[AB]

Or go.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, you. You want me, dad?

[Hila Klein]

You.

[Harley]

If you up my Shambhala, you're coming with me to the next one to apologize.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, you're saying that you don't want me to burn the Shambhala bridge?

[Hila Klein]

Yes.

[Harley]

Well, you know what? It's just one thing actually, is that we. We made the video. So don't. Don't like pause and zoom in on someone in the back. And of course.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, why don't we just play it, then we can watch.

[Harley]

I'm not worried about you.

[Hila Klein]

No, I'm talking. I'm talking about Ethan. Of course he's not gonna do that.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, well, there's. There's certain things I know not to do. Yeah, yeah. And then there's certain things.

[Harley]

That was a bad example.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. What's wrong with you, man?

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

No, that was a very.

[Harley]

Pretend you love it.

[Ethan Klein]

Pretend you love. No, I know not to zoom, Harley.

[AB]

I. Ethan proofed it.

[Gabe]

It's.

[AB]

I think it's good.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, really? So now I'm being challenged? So if you get banned from Shambhala, that's not my fault. AB said he. Ethan proofed it.

[Harley]

AB I'll have Gabe taking your spot in the RV so fast, bro. Trust me, dude.

[Ethan Klein]

Let's do this then. Let's just. Because it's about, what, 20 minutes long after all the cutting and stuff. So then you have an hour long cut that we'll put up for members.

[AB]

The Schneider cut?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, the directors. The A.B. schneider director's cut. We'll put up for members cut. If you just want. This one's 20 minutes. If you want 40 more minutes of shenanigans, make sure to become a member. So let's just roll it then, and then we'll discuss it afterwards.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

One second. We're setting that up because that wasn't the original plan.

[Ethan Klein]

So give me just click play.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Well, you have to download it. It was uploaded onto Drive and that's where we were going to watch it. So now Nate's downloading it.

[Hila Klein]

Why can't we still do that?

[Ethan Klein]

Just play it and then full screen it.

[Hila Klein]

Play it on the drive.

[Harley]

Nate's downloading it.

[Ethan Klein]

You can't play audio from my browser. Oh, my God. What does Nate do? I don't know. I don't know.

[Harley]

Well, you know, when you.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

When you change the whole plan in the moment, sometimes it takes a second.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

What did.

[Harley]

What's AB do? Though, because he was a Shambhala and then he edited this video in like he does Shambhala. What's Dan do?

[Ethan Klein]

Dan? He does.

[Gabe]

Who knows.

[Hila Klein]

Do you want to come audit the company for a couple of days?

[Harley]

I would love to shadow every single person at the company.

[Ethan Klein]

I want you to be the guy from office space because. What did you say do around here?

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

It's gonna have to be.

[Ethan Klein]

I will stand back. Standby.

[Hila Klein]

I think Harley needs to come audit. Give everybody a report. At the end of it, he's gonna

[Ethan Klein]

hit me with what do you think?

[Hila Klein]

Probably make suggestions.

[Ethan Klein]

You know I'm gonna end up getting fired.

[AB]

Well, maybe now's a good time to talk about the T shirt.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh yeah, go ahead. Is it live?

[Hila Klein]

Is this a members look at ab T shirt? Do you see it? Do you see it?

[Ethan Klein]

No. It's not crediting to it or at least I can't see it.

[Harley]

I see it.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay.

[Hila Klein]

Okay.

[Harley]

Sickening.

[Hila Klein]

So that is going to be our new merch shirt. And is it? It is on h2h3shop.com.

[Ethan Klein]

Is it for members?

[Hila Klein]

It is a pre order so it's open for everybody. Because it would basically be the same thing.

[Ethan Klein]

So basically tell you it says Roto as it saved.

[AB]

You want to read says look at this picture closely.

[Hila Klein]

Turn your head sideways.

[AB]

Now squint your eyes.

[Ethan Klein]

Do you see it? Do you see it? Do you see him?

[Gabe]

It's Jesus.

[Ethan Klein]

Like. And subscribe if you can see Jesus Christ. Oh, but the VIPs you guys do have promo codes for the 20% discount. So you still get hooked up there.

[AB]

Chat saying fire. Oh my God, I'm getting the effing shirt.

[Ethan Klein]

It is actually a really sick shirt.

[Kate]

Yeah, especially

[AB]

I'm telling you guys, when I saw him, even though I was up, I was like, I knew in that moment. It kind of sobered me up. I'm like, I just, I feel like I saw Bigfoot.

[Ethan Klein]

He's kind of Bigfoot shaped, isn't he?

[Harley]

You know what's really crazy is you were showing your 5 inch platforms. You know, I have in, in shoe ones that you could slide into every shoe three and a half inches.

[Ethan Klein]

Why do you have, doesn't your foot like pop?

[Hila Klein]

You're already so tall. Why do you have that?

[Harley]

I, I, I know, I know. He, it sounds, it sounds like something's wrong with me. But I'm telling you, when you go meet new people and you're six nine, they remember you.

[Ethan Klein]

You don't have like a weird voice

[Harley]

like a big shiny shoe, big shiny velcro. Shoe or something. People are like, really? Like, whoa, this is crazy. But, yeah, I have pulled up being like six, eight or six, nine at places.

[Hila Klein]

That's insane.

[AB]

I think. Well, it's important to remember Harley's height throughout this video, which it's ready, by the way. But, yeah, there's only a few times where he's just walking. Remember how tall he is?

[Ethan Klein]

So, yeah. Teddy fresh dot com. Grab a shirt.

[Hila Klein]

H3. H3shop dot com. Actually.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, actually. Oh, I got. Okay, I see. So let's roll it.

[Gabe]

Come on.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

This episode is brought to you by Facebook. So you were scrolling on Marketplace, and there it was, the bike you'd been searching for. You sent a message, and it turned out the seller was super chatty, kind of funny, and an avid cyclist. The next thing you know, you're in a cycling crew. Well, a community cycling group. The thing about Facebook, you might find more than what you're looking for, from a browse to a bike ride this summer. Find more on Facebook.

[Harley]

This guy shall follow.

[Ethan Klein]

Epic Meal Time guy.

[Harley]

This is him now, Remember?

[Gabe]

You remember?

[Ethan Klein]

Epic Meal Time.

[Hila Klein]

This is him now.

[Ethan Klein]

This is him now.

[Caller]

Whoa.

[Harley]

Why is he so sick and sad?

[AB]

You don't want to be like this. It's my first time flying international.

[Harley]

You go welcome him to Canada.

[Ethan Klein]

Fake you.

[AB]

Oh, my God. So this is Tyler. This is the dude that's supposed to be taking care of us this weekend. I guess he met Harley at a previous Shambhala. They became friends. Harley even stayed at Tyler's house on the way back from Shambhala last time. And Tyler forced Harley to watch old Epic Meal Time videos while he was high.

[Harley]

This guy's funny, bro. I like this guy.

[AB]

The rental place took forever, and Harley even ended up getting into an argument with one of the employees. So after Harley and Tyler woke up, we walked around, and this is the first area that I walked through.

[Hila Klein]

Through.

[AB]

And I'm not going to lie, at first, I felt like I was walking through Jonestown. I'm like, what the hell is going on now? I knew it was Pilates or some shit, but it was a sight to see. Felt like everybody drank the Kool Aid and we got there late. Immediately, I got the sense that the vibes were great there. Everyone was super friendly. The staff was friendly. They had all these cool, like, harm reduction centers where you could test all your drugs. And I was just, like, taken back by how beautiful the area was. The trees, like, you really can't tell how pretty they are through the video. But, yeah, it was really nice. They had this downtown area where you could go shopping. There's a bunch of vendors for food and ice cream and drinks. Not alcoholic drinks, but drinks like lemonade. After we walked around for a little bit, we went back to the RV to lay down. And we quickly realized that the water was not working in the rv and also the electricity kept going out. These are two problems that we would not solve this whole trip.

[Harley]

This is out of control.

[Ethan Klein]

There's no cutlery. We didn't get the cutlery package because

[Harley]

it was $300 to get cutlery and all the other things. Smoked oysters with a.

[AB]

Are you day one, baby?

[Harley]

This is literally day one. It's actually not day one. It didn't start yet.

[Hila Klein]

Right?

[Ethan Klein]

Day point five, baby. Dude, I'm one leg away from. Don't worry about it. What are you talking about?

[Harley]

Gambling?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, I'm gambling.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

I had to pay for the generator

[Ethan Klein]

because your ass is too cheap. Not me.

[Harley]

Ab was paying for the generator because

[Ethan Klein]

AB is too cheap.

[AB]

I've already asked for for so much. Harley, you ask anything. If we can use the company card, I'm sure he'll say yes. And Harley said, no.

[Harley]

I'm saving that for a gaming computer. I'm not going to waste it on a generator.

[AB]

So Tyler stayed in the trailer, and me and Harley walked around. He said it was time to get the goods. I was surprised by how many people Harley knew at Shambhala.

[Harley]

Oh, Jordy, dude, I'm recording right now. I'm recording.

[Nate]

What's up? This is Ab.

[Harley]

This is my buddy Ab.

[AB]

He was recognized a lot from Epic meal time, but. But also he just knew a lot of people from previous years.

[Ethan Klein]

Was that the guy?

[AB]

This is when things started to get a little dicey for me. We eventually ended up at this RV where this very nice, professional friendly drug dealer was there. And he had these menus that were laminated with all these drugs that I never tried before. Harley was putting in his order, and there was, like this girl dancing inside. She was really nice, but she wasn't really paying attention to us. And so I was asking the very friendly drug dealer all these questions, and he was answering them like a pharmacist. Obviously, the dude only took cash. Harley didn't have cash on him. So I spotted him and we put in our order. See, initially, I didn't plan on doing any of this stuff. I planned on just observing from the outside and reporting on that. But at this point, being that we were behind schedule, I was starting to get a little worried that we may not have contact. So I was like, you know what? I'm going to get the full Shambhala experience, and I'm going to commit. I'm going to try these drugs that I've never done before. Harley took some of his immediately. I was still holding back.

[Harley]

Thirty hours later, you're still wearing that shirt.

[AB]

It was around this point that I started to feel like my normal anxious self. And I felt like I wasn't getting the content that I had come here to get.

[Ethan Klein]

He was with me.

[Harley]

At one point, music started playing, and I turned around, he was gone. So I stood there for, like, 45 minutes, and I was, okay, I'm going to go look for him. I turn around, and AB had come

[Ethan Klein]

back at some point, but he was,

[Harley]

like, upgraded, but, like, he got, like, a mask with, like, glowing lights on it, bulletproof vest with, like, lights on it. And I was like, whoa, AB Is that Shambala? I. I need to transfer you money so you could. You could buy from him.

[Ethan Klein]

Him you can get.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

You've known him, right?

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Harley]

So, okay, so I'm going to transfer you money, and you'll get. I literally need you to be Epstein. No, seriously, I feel Gates.

[Gabe]

You're Epstein.

[Harley]

I want you to talk to the drug dealers. Bring me the drugs, not kids. I don't do the kids stuff. I'm into the drug stuff.

[Ethan Klein]

I must be up, cuz.

[AB]

I actually understood what you were saying.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Right.

[AB]

I followed that.

[Harley]

You're Stephen Hawking.

[AB]

Thank you, baby.

[Harley]

Are you watching this?

[AB]

Yeah, bro. You're like, Neo. I feel like I'm watching Neo right now.

[Harley]

Do you see what's going on?

[AB]

AP Bro, he's starting to believe. This is what you can literally do, Shamala.

[Ethan Klein]

Here.

[AB]

This is what you can pay for.

[Ethan Klein]

Here, come in my bedroom. Yeah, like I give a. Oh, really? That's what you want to say after you expose yourself to a minor?

[Harley]

Wait, wait, hold on.

[Kate]

That wasn't.

[Ethan Klein]

Dude, don't do it, bro.

[Harley]

Below where we're going, we won't need blow. Marty, I'm gonna suck your dick in the future.

[AB]

It's been cornered in this little shower.

[Nate]

Doc, you're tripping.

[AB]

We don't have running water, so I'm brushing my teeth and rinsing it out with white monster. So we did a little exploring. Harley showed me around. The next day, we went back by the river, and it was really cool. I was trying to not be, like, creepy. I just was trying to, like, capture the vibes. There was a lot of naked people, and I made sure not to get them on camera. I wasn't surprised by the girls, but I, I, I saw a few.

[Tom]

Few dicks.

[AB]

Few dicks out there. Harley was ready to go. Like, as soon as he woke up, he was ready to party. I lost Harley. Something inside of me is telling me if I follow those lights, I will

[Ethan Klein]

get back to him.

[AB]

But also, I don't know if I should just stay at the rv because he's more likely to come back here.

[Harley]

Where were you guys?

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Like, all the video footage of me

[Ethan Klein]

is just gonna be me in the bed. I just realized you're so right.

[AB]

I feel like every time you called him a patient last night, you're actually gonna think he's a patient. I gotta give him some credit. Harley almost just started the burner. And look at you.

[Nate]

This is.

[AB]

You're supposed to be showing me the ropes.

[Ethan Klein]

You would not be able to deal ab.

[Harley]

Where were you guys for the last

[Nate]

hour, by the way?

[Gabe]

You good?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[Harley]

Is it actually as clean as it looks? Is it dry and normal?

[AB]

It's perfectly fine. Again, that's the guy that's supposed to be taking care of me.

[Ethan Klein]

Harley, can I borrow this?

[Harley]

That's actually.

[Dan]

No, it is.

[Gabe]

Don't.

[Harley]

That is trippy to ask me that right now.

[AB]

It's Friday night. This. This legendary night that Harley's been telling me about, saying it's gonna be real crazy. You're not sleeping in the editing.

[Ethan Klein]

Can we put my steak affiliate link in?

[AB]

We gotta go back up there.

[Ethan Klein]

He's working.

[Caller]

I gotta get.

[Harley]

I gotta get back out there.

[Gabe]

Okay.

[Ethan Klein]

All right, guys, we're going to Jamala. I'm literally never taking you guys anywhere again.

[AB]

We're behind schedule. We're not getting enough content. So here we went grocery shopping. This is what we got.

[Gabe]

I'm not the content.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, you want to have. You want to have a vlog off?

[Harley]

I wouldn't put that down. Look at this.

[AB]

Anyways, this is what we got. We can't cook it. We can't get the goddamn thing to get all the cameras on me.

[Nate]

That's okay.

[AB]

No, no, I've been.

[Nate]

No, no.

[AB]

What am I going to do with this right here? I asked Harley to help me set up a bit that I would use later, but he was too high.

[Ethan Klein]

Ask you why the.

[AB]

I'm wearing the vest. Say something.

[Ethan Klein]

I'm having a very hard time with this dude.

[AB]

We finally got out of the rv and we were ready for the first official night of Shambhala.

[Nate]

Hey, B.

[Gabe]

Yo, what's up?

[Ethan Klein]

Harley didn't know you were here?

[Harley]

Yeah, dude.

[Ethan Klein]

You're from all the legendary YouTubers. Come there.

[Kate]

Get.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, dude. If you guys were on the that

[Harley]

I'm on right now, you be looking at AP you'd be like, damn, that's my Shambhala date. Are you my Shambhala?

[Ethan Klein]

Dude, I'm your Shambala.

[Harley]

Yeah. AB I know we're both straight men, but if we were gay people snagged

[Ethan Klein]

a real baddie tapir.

[Harley]

I'm the last guy on a lot of drugs, but this looks insane, right?

[Ethan Klein]

I know that guy. Bro, look, bro.

[Hila Klein]

What?

[AB]

What?

[Caller]

What?

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, God. We look like this all night.

[AB]

You look like this all night, but you look cool.

[Ethan Klein]

I don't know. Hey, you look pretty cool, too.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Thanks.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, yeah, I was deleted. But we each other.

[Hila Klein]

Don't worry, bro.

[Ethan Klein]

We're not each other.

[AB]

The tacos are the first thing I've had here that really first night.

[Ethan Klein]

I.

[Harley]

You told AB I was like, we got to get back out there. And he was so serious. He's like, do you want to go back out dressed as Marty and Doc from Back to the Future?

[Ethan Klein]

He loves Back to the future.

[Gabe]

Like, A.B.

[Harley]

i would love nothing more. I'm like, all right. But just so you know, people aren't really going to give a looks at me.

[Kate]

So serious.

[Harley]

He's like, you're the doc, Doc.

[Ethan Klein]

You good?

[AB]

This is heavy, Doc.

[Harley]

I'm trying to keep.

[Ethan Klein]

Keep it down because Tyler's sleeping. Harley and me split quite an hour ago, and I'm actually a little worried

[AB]

about him, so I'm going to the search and rescue Operation Save Harley has begun. When I opened the door and told it was light out, it scared the out of me. This loaded like a video game. What the.

[Nate]

Damn.

[AB]

It's pretty cold. I don't think he was dressed for this either. Freezing, as my dad would say.

[Ethan Klein]

This is crazy.

[AB]

I feel like I'm about to walk in on, like, that orgy from Zion. If I was Harley, where would I be? I can't find my drugs.

[Ethan Klein]

Yo, yo, film me.

[Kate]

Film me.

[Ethan Klein]

Look, I'm not in bed.

[AB]

I can't find my pants either.

[Ethan Klein]

As soon as I get in the bed, you turn the camera on. I'm not always in bed.

[AB]

Only footage of you in bed. We're watching Oliver's memorial right now. Tyler knew Oliver as well.

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[AB]

Show me. Got some Oliver tattoos.

[Ethan Klein]

What are the other ones?

[AB]

Oh, miss you.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, yeah.

[AB]

It says miss you. Trust me, there's two of them. It was nice that Tyler was with me to watch Oliver's memorial. Because it was nice to honor Oliver's memory with somebody who knew him and somebody who knew what a great person he was. I think Ethan did a great job hosting it, and it was cool. I was just, like, going through old, like, BTS footage showing Tyler of Oliver, and, like, we were just telling stories back and forth about what a cool dude he was.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

One of those two.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, I'll take four of those and.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah, just two of these. One of these.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, get her three of those.

[Caller]

Okay.

[AB]

Also, while we were watching the memorial, someone posted this photo of Ethan and BB no Money on a subreddit. And that's when I learned that Tyler works with BB no money. Small world, but I think that shows how Oliver was able to just get along with everyone from all sides of the Internet.

[Ethan Klein]

Make that change.

[AB]

Shortly after this, we found Harley. Me and Harley did more drugs, and then we went out. We did a lot of drugs. This was backstage at another one of the venues. We were trying to find, like, a yerba mate because all of the stands were starting to run out. So we were hoping that we could find some backstage or any kind of, like, energy drink. The first venue didn't have any, so Tyler took us backstage at another guys,

[Ethan Klein]

day two of Shambhala. I'm here with AB and

[Harley]

I'm bricked up.

[AB]

I lost my throats and my pants.

[Harley]

This guy shall follow. I like being scared. I take acid, and then I got all weird and wobbly, and I feel like. I feel stupid and I can't communicate, and I. I feel. I feel gay like that.

[Ethan Klein]

Just based on what they told me.

[Harley]

I'm not you at Shambhala, by the way. I'm not gonna you at Shambhala, dude. Stop trying to me at Shambhala. Stop trying to me a Shambhala, bro. I'm not gonna you a Shambhala.

[Ethan Klein]

I'll suck your dick, though, Ab.

[Caller]

Hey, B.

[Ethan Klein]

Don't you walk away from me. Abdullah. Abdullah.

[Harley]

We got my.

[Ethan Klein]

We got my Abdullah chambola before she da6.

[AB]

We got Abdullah jambala before GTA6.

[Ethan Klein]

We Abd jala before GTA6.

[Harley]

All right, Meta, that's enough.

[Ethan Klein]

All right, B. You got to get the wobbles, baby. You got to get the wobbles, AB with the Denny's rose. Let's go, baby.

[Caller]

Oh, my God.

[Ethan Klein]

Yo, Did AB tell you I'm day

[Harley]

two of Shambhala and going on the secret stage now, which is important to me in ap because we had our first fight yesterday there. It was mostly my fault because he was dressed as Marty McFly. And I was dressed as Doc. And it was a big moment and I kind of was like doing too much. But not in a good Doc way. It was like in a weirded up paranoid type of way.

[Ethan Klein]

You're the Doc, Doc.

[Harley]

So me and Ab fought here and then we on that hammock. By the way, me and Ab didn't Ab I'm not you. A jambala. You know that, right?

[AB]

Yeah.

[Harley]

Standing on business though.

[Kate]

On God.

[Harley]

I'm not going to fuck you at your mall.

[Ethan Klein]

Crazy frog.

[Harley]

That's my shambala baddy. Buy me a yerba mate. You know I'm not you, right? You know I'm not going to you, right? I'll suck your dick though.

[AB]

Harley's sleeping in his boots.

[Caller]

What the ap.

[Kate]

Go get. Go to bed.

[Gabe]

What?

[AB]

Go to bed. Right back at you.

[Harley]

What time is it? It's like 4am that's right. And you know how long the music goes to, do you?

[AB]

No.

[Nate]

Me neither.

[Harley]

Like six or seven.

[Dan]

Sick.

[AB]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

That's why I said I want.

[AB]

I'm going back out.

[Ethan Klein]

I can't.

[Harley]

I have a fur coat for you.

[AB]

And I'm going to join him cuz

[Ethan Klein]

I can't leave him behind.

[AB]

And he gave me this fur coat to rock.

[Ethan Klein]

Let's go. Oh, let's go, Abdullah. Yambala. All right, Harley, what is this called? A donair.

[AB]

Ethan had texted us earlier in the night and said, hope you guys are staying safe and having fun. And I don't know why I thought it would be appropriate to respond with this video at 4am what's up, Ethan?

[Ethan Klein]

Hi.

[AB]

We're doing great.

[Ethan Klein]

We're so proud of you.

[Harley]

You did so well today.

[Gabe]

Yeah, he did.

[AB]

Everyone here was watching it.

[Ethan Klein]

Are you going to tell them that

[Harley]

you're on Cocon Molly and ask?

[Ethan Klein]

No.

[Hila Klein]

Okay.

[AB]

Everything's good.

[Ethan Klein]

Have a good night.

[AB]

Harley became friends with One of the DJs, DJ Susan, who's actually a really nice guy. But when Harley was hanging out with him and his crew, he was a little high and Harley thought it'd be funny to FaceTime Mr. Beast and leave him a video voicemail. I think he called him multiple times, but I could be wrong.

[Ethan Klein]

Jimmy.

[Hila Klein]

Yes.

[Ethan Klein]

Dude, if he picks up. If he picks it up this time. Shambhala. This is the best place to manifest. Everyone manifest. Everyone manifested.

[Caller]

Manifested a land.

[AB]

It was officially the last night of Shambhala. We were so low on support supplies, we were low on food. Electricity kept cutting out. And to be honest, the hardest part was that I missed my wife I missed Lena, I missed Rocky. Shambhala was super fun, but it felt like my own odyssey and I just wanted to get home. But that being said, it was the last night and I wanted to have a good time. I used what remaining drugs I had and we went all out. We're supposed to go on stage stage with this DJ in like 10 minutes.

[Harley]

Ethan Klein owes me $4,000. All right, so here's what we got to do. We got to make a video.

[Ethan Klein]

So this is the video.

[Harley]

AB came to Shambhala. I took acid in his face. I took ketamine in his face. I've been yelling and screaming, but dude is here, but with a bulletproof vest on. Dressed like a cowboy with a GoPro. He understands the assignment. Hell yeah, my man. Triforce of wisdom, power and knowledge. And knowledge.

[Ethan Klein]

Knowledge is that.

[AB]

No, it's not knowledge. It's courage.

[Harley]

Courage. Courage, you idiot. You just failed the test.

[AB]

Courage, wisdom and power.

[Ethan Klein]

What is this? What? What?

[Harley]

Standing on business though.

[Kate]

On God.

[Ethan Klein]

I'm not gonna bug you at your.

[AB]

Budget.

[Ethan Klein]

A. Wow, he's out. Oh, oh.

[Harley]

We need like $3,500. Might need you to lend me money.

[Ethan Klein]

Do you hear that? Well, well, well.

[Dan]

What is this?

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Business?

[Harley]

Business call.

[Gabe]

Hello?

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Hi.

[Harley]

How crazy they be such a baller right now.

[Ethan Klein]

I know, it's very strange.

[Harley]

Isn't it insane? He's not a person that should be be here. It is super random. It's.

[Ethan Klein]

He's.

[Harley]

He's not a person that should be here. It's a podcast. Well, you know, epic meal time.

[Gabe]

Yes. Cool.

[AB]

That's all just like that? We're off this chronicles.

[Ethan Klein]

This bucket. Don't do that.

[Harley]

That's crazy, yo. Just drove for like three hours straight. Cuz I'm the sickest guy and I'm letting everyone else catch up on sleep.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Baby.

[Harley]

AB is sleeping in there, so.

[Caller]

Shh.

[AB]

Just turned in the rv. We were cutting it super close. I'm afraid that we're not gonna make our flight, so I called back up. Yes, yes.

[Ethan Klein]

You're late.

[AB]

Open the door.

[Hila Klein]

Gallia.

[AB]

My hero. Oh, we gotta get Harley too. But that was a sick ass entrance.

[Harley]

He's.

[Ethan Klein]

He's a little different.

[AB]

Tell me, Harley, where we going this time? We might be screw up, but the chaos is prime. But it's all good. We'll just try.

[Ethan Klein]

There it is, guys. A.B. and Harley Shambhala. So looks like you guys had fun.

[AB]

Yeah, you know, it was a lot of fun.

[Gabe]

All right.

[Ethan Klein]

Do you remember anything, Harley?

[Harley]

Yeah, I recorded it.

[Ethan Klein]

All right. It's Hard to forget.

[Kate]

I said.

[Harley]

I was like, hey, Meta. Every time I start to act like a idiot. Record everything, please.

[Ethan Klein]

So is it true you guys didn't have silverware in the camper because it's 300 for the cutlery package or is that a joke?

[Harley]

So it's crazy. It was. It's like about 300 for one bedding and a cutlery package. Two chairs.

[Ethan Klein]

Cutlery package. You mean just a fork and a knife and a spoon?

[Harley]

Yeah, for. And like plates and stuff. I know.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

And they.

[Harley]

And they charged us.

[Ethan Klein]

Dude, you didn't get the cutlery or you did get the cutler.

[Harley]

No, they didn't. And they did. I didn't get it. And they charged us.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, that's not acceptable, but.

[Harley]

I know. But don't worry, I'm talking to them for us.

[Ethan Klein]

Good. Yeah, good.

[Harley]

So I'll make sure we get our money back.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay, good.

[Dan]

Yeah, yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

I didn't give them any of my.

[Harley]

Yeah, and also the, the. The water in the rv. I've been. I've been. I've been talking to them and I'm going to get that squared away also because I'm not going to let them do that to you.

[Ethan Klein]

No water.

[Nate]

You spent.

[Harley]

No. And you spent good money, so there's nothing.

[Ethan Klein]

I didn't spend any money. I don't know. But Gabe, would that seem like something you'd want to do?

[Gabe]

I don't think so. If there's no spoon, there's no spoon.

[Hila Klein]

Right?

[Gabe]

I'm not. I think it'd be fun.

[Hila Klein]

But don't worry, Harley's not gonna you.

[Ethan Klein]

So that's good.

[AB]

God.

[Harley]

I won't. I promise. I promise.

[Gabe]

But a shading amount of money for that.

[Harley]

Just so everyone knows, okay, where we were parked, where the RV was, it is like a 52nd walk to bathrooms, showers, water, a bar that had like a happy hour.

[Hila Klein]

I see Ab shaking his head.

[AB]

No, we hated it a lot better than the rest of the people there who were camping. But it wasn't. Yeah, we're close to the showers, but then there's like an hour wait for the showers, for the cold shower.

[Ethan Klein]

So did anyone. Did any of you guys actually end up taking a shower or you just

[Harley]

said, yeah, I showered. I showered every day. And the first day I waited like 30 minutes and got a freezing cold shower.

[Ethan Klein]

Look how they don't think about this.

[AB]

I showered once.

[Ethan Klein]

This isn't going to be. This isn't good if you just lie. Harley, I know you didn't.

[Harley]

About the showering. Yeah, it's so crazy. I do. I acknowledge I look like I stink. And so I take a care to make sure I don't, because in the event that I'm in a stinky room or something.

[Ethan Klein]

Shaking his head, no, no, no.

[AB]

You know, he definitely did shower. No.

[Ethan Klein]

Why you do. Oh, you.

[AB]

Oh, I would say.

[Ethan Klein]

I would say it's also.

[Harley]

I didn't snore. That's not my snoring in video.

[Ethan Klein]

So tell them maybe would you go, Gabe, knowing that there's a shower there and let's say you could borrow a spoon. Would you go, gabo.

[Gabe]

Oh, if. If it's clean. If it's clean and sanitized, like, you know, like you doing the dishwash, dish washing in the dish. Let's say, yeah, you'll go.

[Ethan Klein]

If we can get clean cutlery.

[Harley]

It's wooden cutlery. It's wooden cutlery.

[Gabe]

Basic shower, running water and all that stuff. I say, yeah, I enjoy it.

[Harley]

You get all that?

[Gabe]

Okay.

[Harley]

You get all that? AB was actually pampered there. People don't shower there.

[AB]

I. Yeah.

[Harley]

I don't know. Dude, you must.

[AB]

No, that's what I'm saying. We had a lot better than everyone else. I was laughing because Harley forgot to bring a. A towel. And so he kept asking Tyler, can I use your towel? And Tyler's like, I haven't even used it yet. He's like, bro, please, I'll keep it clean. He kept saying, I won't. I won't get it dirty. And so we're walking to the shower the whole trip. Harley's telling me that my Crocs are dangerous to wear Crocs. Harley's wearing Crocs and just eats shit.

[Harley]

Tell them about your Crocs, though.

[AB]

He eats.

[Tom]

I did.

[Harley]

I fell.

[AB]

And he holds the toothbrush as he's falling. And as he's falling, Tyler's towel is just going through this hill of mud, like, immediately after.

[Ethan Klein]

Poor Tyler, he went there sober, and he got the brunt of all the chaos. He's in bed the whole time. He didn't even get out of bed because you guys put him through so much, by the way.

[Harley]

He didn't even spend a dollar.

[Ethan Klein]

I want to give a shout out. He spent a dollar to the entire state of Idaho. I. Oh, Idaho.

[Nate]

Idaho.

[Ethan Klein]

Ojai.

[Nate]

Oh.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, yeah.

[Hila Klein]

What?

[Ethan Klein]

You got it, Ojai. Move on, Ohio. I don't know why. Yes, Sorry, I had a stroke. I'm back. We had a call tomorrow. Wants me to shout out Ohio. I guess there's a fan meet up there. Or something. But one of the calls we got earlier in the show was someone from Ohio, wasn't it?

[Hila Klein]

Why did we cut them off for this? We're talking about Abdullah and Shambhala.

[AB]

Thank you, Hilo. Yeah, why are we talking?

[Ethan Klein]

It was just meant to be a quickest side, but then I couldn't pronunciate. Pronunciate it. Go on guys, go on. Thank you. You guys. Over Tyler. All right. Poor Tyler.

[Harley]

He won, dude, he won. He even won his big bet there. And he was like, I want 1600 on an eight leg parlay. And I was like, cool, you're throwing in for the RV now.

[AB]

He was. He was winning and it was crazy, cuz I don't know like anything about gambling.

[Ethan Klein]

He'd lose it all though. That's how it works.

[AB]

Yeah, but he was like, by the second day he's like, I'm quitting my job. I'm like, don't quit your job. But like we'd be walking past. I didn't even see. He's like at this like side table, he's like, yo guys, I just hit this parlay on a eight legged whatever. I'm like, I have no idea what that is.

[Ethan Klein]

But yo, you parlay, bro.

[AB]

He parlayed.

[Ethan Klein]

So let's see. We got no cutlery.

[Hila Klein]

So does somebody sober enjoy Shambhala?

[AB]

Like so they have a sober whatchamacallit

[Ethan Klein]

campsite where we're camp clean Be Tyler go there?

[AB]

He did actually.

[Harley]

He knew people. He knew people there.

[AB]

Sorry, no go. No sorry.

[Ethan Klein]

And was that dump them out sign? Was that. Did someone actually bring that?

[Tom]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, hell yeah.

[Hila Klein]

That was so cool. And. And do you have any info on the Dan Fox sign?

[Harley]

He's been there for years at the Shambhala. Dan Fox. On the other side of the sign it says I'm Dan.

[Hila Klein]

Oh, that's funny.

[AB]

But like when you're messed up and you see that, you know like when like Dan's big bro.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah, I would be tripping.

[AB]

Yeah, my big bro brother's watching. He knows. He knows what I did.

[Hila Klein]

Harley, Teddy wants to say hi to you real quick.

[AB]

Hi.

[Harley]

Look how big you are, dude. You're so.

[Ethan Klein]

Hi, Harley.

[Hila Klein]

Teddy, you remember when Harley took us to Five below? Yeah, that was fun.

[Harley]

Look how big you are. You're so tall now.

[Ethan Klein]

All right.

[Harley]

Are you wearing your dad's boots?

[AB]

No.

[Ethan Klein]

I did though.

[Hila Klein]

He tried it on.

[Ethan Klein]

All right, we good? All right, get out of here. All right, scram.

[Harley]

Okay, so like 15 bigger.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[Hila Klein]

That's crazy.

[Ethan Klein]

So wait how does it. Who ended up bringing the Dump them out sign? Who was that?

[Harley]

H3 fans.

[Hila Klein]

Wow.

[Harley]

And they said that they were like. Yeah, we put Dump them out because it'll be, like, assigned to you H3 people that. We're H3 fans.

[Ethan Klein]

Did it. Did it work? Did they.

[Harley]

Yeah, they summoned me.

[Dan]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

It's something.

[AB]

Yeah. And we. When we. DJ Susan Shout out invited us on stage. And when we were on stage, the Dump them out sign was right in front, which is cool.

[Ethan Klein]

Dump them the out, bro.

[Harley]

It happened to make me look very cool because everyone's like, you see that totem of you there? Totem? That's so crazy.

[Ethan Klein]

Ask the guy. I heard you got super paranoid on acid and you thought people were with it. Did we talk about that already on the show?

[Harley]

We didn't talk about this. I would love to tell you. I'd love.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. Because I heard you were acting a little bit nutty on the acid.

[Hila Klein]

I also would like to know what's your favorite drug?

[Harley]

First of all, my. I was acting nutty, but I. I warned AB that something like that could happen before we went out there. And also, just so you guys know, I don't. I don't do cocaine. I don't do molly. I don't do a lot of stuff. But I know those are just ones that get thrown around a lot.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

And.

[Harley]

Yeah, I don't do that. I also actually don't party half as much as I.

[Ethan Klein]

Is he lying maybe?

[AB]

No, he's not lying.

[Caller]

No.

[Harley]

Yeah. And I don't. And I. But it is funny. Like, when I get. When I get there, I'm like, oh, yeah, we got to get some coke to be responsible.

[Ethan Klein]

Right. In case you need to pick me up.

[Harley]

I know it sounds so insane, but you're like, yeah, we gotta get.

[Ethan Klein]

Gotta be responsible in an emergency. In an emergency situation, you need to have a line ready.

[AB]

I'll tell you. I'll explain it. You feel like dog, and you cannot.

[Hila Klein]

Then you move.

[Tom]

Yeah.

[AB]

So to wake up.

[Hila Klein]

I've been there.

[AB]

You do you do that. Oh, you do a bump to do that. And then you also feel like. But now you can move a little bit.

[Hila Klein]

Wow.

[AB]

Yeah.

[Hila Klein]

But then after all of that, you probably fill so much.

[AB]

Oh, yeah. Yeah. Harley walked in on me one time and he's like, who the are you, dude? He's like. He's like, now you're doing it by yourself.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, God. You're doing secret lines by yourself, baby Jesus. Oh, my God, you guys. Yeah, we got it.

[Harley]

I'll be Honest, we got it. And he was like, yo, dude, did I ever tell you about that time I started a real estate company in Dearborn? Dude built that up and ran it into the ground.

[AB]

One time I did coke. Previously.

[Harley]

I'll tell you about some of the most powerful families in Dearborn, dude. You don't know the that's going on there.

[AB]

He actually, he follows this guy from Dearborn who would be like. He would be like prime show content. But I'm afraid to talk about him because you literally like go after my family. But like. So yeah, that's where that came from. But yeah, I told him like in 2016, the one other time I did. I did coke in my life, it was at like a real estate office. And like me and my friend and a few of my friends started like a real estate company for like a month.

[Ethan Klein]

So it dissolved.

[Gabe]

It.

[Ethan Klein]

It sounds like you're. Sounds like a skilled idea. Yeah, exactly. It sounds like a accurate retelling of what happened.

[Harley]

There was a second of me being like, hold on.

[Ethan Klein]

Tell us about you. Tell us about Paranoid Harley.

[AB]

All right, so yeah, so he did acid and he could not like get out of the trailer at first. Like that first night, the big. Cause we got there before the actual first night. We got there the day before.

[Hila Klein]

He says in the video, it's not started yet.

[AB]

Yeah, it's not started yet. So that night, ready to go. I was ready to go. I was too ready to go. And so, yeah, I was just waiting on him to like gather himself. And then we did go out and then we went back for whatever reason. And then I asked him if he wanted to dress up as Doc and Marty. And he was like, I would love nothing more. His retelling of that was exactly how. And I was like, oh, for real? And he's like, yeah. I'm like, yeah, let's do it. I didn't think he'd want to do it that night, cuz he was tripping acid. But he did.

[Harley]

That's the night you do it. That's when you do it.

[Hila Klein]

Wait, but when was he.

[Ethan Klein]

What's the paranoid.

[Harley]

Yeah, so what happened was when I told him, I said, okay, so now I'm dressing up like Doc and you're going to be Marty. Now what this does is it sends out a bat signal to the people that come here and like doing bits. Some people come and like do a bit. There's a guy that brings a treadmill to the dance floor. He has a huge beard, long hair, he wears a hat and he Runs on the treadmill. And every now and then he takes out some coke and does a bump. And everyone calls him or knows him as Forest Bump. And he shows up there.

[Hila Klein]

There's another guy brings a treadmill, literally

[Harley]

like a running pad thing. And he, like, runs on it on the dance floor and, like, does bumps. There's this guy that. That wears a suit on the dance floor, and he has, like, an old cell phone and a briefcase. And he, like, walks back and forth in front of the dance floor and he looks back and he's, like, yelling at someone. And then he'll, like, slam the phone shut and open up his briefcase filled with drugs and do drugs.

[Ethan Klein]

Did you see these people, A.B.

[AB]

yeah, I saw a few of them. Yeah.

[Harley]

Okay, so. And I. I have videos from. From previous years of this. There's. There's one people. One of my favorite bits is they bring a. A velvet rope and they set it up on the dance floor and they refer to it as the vip. And they have, like, a bucket with champagne bottle and ice. They have a bouncer that stands there, a lady with a checkboard. And you go over and be like, I'm on the list. And they're like, I don't know about that. Or they let you in. But it's not really a vip. It's just a velvet rope section on the dance floor that's just the same as everywhere else. Standing on the mud. But it's like, a little bit. But these people, when they see someone dressed like a cow, they'll come over and say stuff. Now, I'll tell you guys what happened. We were at the deepest stage at Shambhala.

[Nate]

You're.

[Harley]

You went all the way in. You're as far. It's the furthest stage you can go to. And we're standing there, and this guy comes over and. And AB Said he was in regular clothes. I will tell you that he's wearing somewhat of, like, hiking clothes. Everyone's dressed like an. This guy's wearing cargo pants. He has a map out. He has. He has.

[Ethan Klein]

He's literally, like, dressed like a map on his phone.

[AB]

He's not like, Indiana.

[Harley]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And he literally comes up to us. We're at the Grove at 3am at Shambhala, and he comes up to Doc and Marty out of all people you can go to. And he was like, excuse me, monsieur, there is Zig Grove.

[AB]

He was a German French dude.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay.

[Harley]

And I'm like, oh, so this.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, the Grove. Yeah. Oh, were you looking for the Grove?

[Harley]

Let me See, because he's his phone on his map here. And he shows me this, like, map that is literally a cartoon picture that says the Grove. It's the Grove there.

[Hila Klein]

Okay.

[Harley]

And I'm like, oh,

[Kate]

I think the

[Harley]

grove is right here. You see all this noise next to us? That's the Grove. And he was like, okay. And he literally walked 10ft and stood with his friends who were already there. Stood with three other people.

[Ethan Klein]

Is this all accurate? Is this an accurate retelling of what

[AB]

happened Ab, from his point of view? Yes. I mean, like, the dude comes up and then Harley, if you continue the story. Let me my side up to this point. Yes. The guy comes up, he's kind of dressed normally, has an accent. He goes, excuse me, where is the Grove? And then. And Harley's like, you want to know where the Grove's at? Mind you, he's. He's Doc Brown. He's towering this man. He goes, you want to know where the Grove's at? He goes, we're at the Grove right now.

[Ethan Klein]

Aggro. He's getting aggressive.

[Harley]

Not aggressive, but my bit was like, I was much more like the Grove.

[Ethan Klein]

Hold on, hold on. AB has interpreted your. Your lang. Your body language differently. It seems like that's because all of

[Harley]

AB, like, all of AB's story here, banks are acid, and I have no idea what's going on.

[AB]

Yes.

[Harley]

Okay, makes sense.

[Ethan Klein]

So ab, you tell your. You your account, and then. Then Harley can respond.

[AB]

So, yeah, see, it comes down to, do you want to trust Molly or do you want to trust Acid? But yeah, the dude was like.

[Ethan Klein]

He showed I trust Molly for the right.

[AB]

He showed his phone. He had like. It was in, like, a different language. And he had text message opening, open with the map on there.

[Ethan Klein]

Soft French. On his phone?

[AB]

Yeah, on his phone. And then he's like. Harley's like, it's right here. And then he goes.

[Hila Klein]

He looks.

[AB]

He looks around a little bit. Then he sees his friends. He walks to his friends. So I just think it was a foreign dude trying to find out where he was at. He saw his friends that have. He was. He was questioning if he was in the right place. And so I think.

[Ethan Klein]

Hold on, Ar. Hold on, hold on, hold on. Let him finish. No, it's not. It's not done. It's done.

[Harley]

It's done.

[Ethan Klein]

Go on, Ab.

[AB]

Yes. So he's just questioning if he's in the right place. He found out he was in the right place, all his friends and then went like that. He wasn't like, taking pictures of him. He wasn't, like, with us at all. He was just like. The dude was like. My height may be a little shorter. Mind you, Harley's like, fucking six. Whatever.

[Ethan Klein]

Is his height relevant? Well, I'm just saying because I'm physically intimidating.

[AB]

Physically intimidating, especially.

[Harley]

I'm a monster right now. I'm an acid monster.

[Ethan Klein]

Go on, Ab.

[AB]

Go ahead. That's. That's my.

[Ethan Klein]

No, you didn't know. You didn't explain the paranoid part.

[AB]

Oh, sorry. So, yeah, the guy walked away and he goes. He hardly pulled into the side. Goes. Just so you know, that guy was with us, mind you.

[Harley]

So. Mind you saying it there. Context sounds like. I'm like, this guy's with us. I was more like, so, Ab, that's exactly what I was talking about.

[AB]

Okay?

[Harley]

Someone will come over and do a big.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay.

[Tom]

Yeah, so.

[Harley]

And they're not.

[AB]

He does his voice. He does his voice better than I do.

[Gabe]

A.B.

[Ethan Klein]

says Harley was getting all crazy. He thought he was all paranoid, that everybody was with him constantly. And people would come up and he was like, they're with me. Is that person with me? Just seem. You made it is. Was it like an epidemic of paranoia? So this is.

[AB]

This is the second guy.

[Ethan Klein]

So the second time Harley's accused someone of fucking the first time.

[AB]

It's only the only two people that talk to us.

[Harley]

I told Ab when we're on the way out. I said, just so you know, you attract a type of person who likes to goof around. So you were gonna get that. And then when the guy came, I was like, perfect example. That guy's not French.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay.

[AB]

But that's the second guy, the fake Frenchman. The first guy was this gay dude on a bike. God bless him.

[Harley]

We don't know if he was.

[Gabe]

Why?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, why, baby?

[Tom]

No.

[AB]

Well, he was. That night. I don't.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

He.

[AB]

He was.

[Nate]

He.

[AB]

He was.

[Ethan Klein]

Hey, so was I. Yeah, I know.

[AB]

So he came up to Harley.

[Ethan Klein]

Wait on a bike.

[Harley]

That sounds like we fucked. Say that. We didn't fuck, though. The way you said that there made it sound like we had said, we'll

[AB]

have to watch the extended cut.

[Ethan Klein]

That's true. Members?

[AB]

Yeah, members. But, yeah, the guy came up on a bike. He goes, oh, my God, who are you? And then, like. And then was already on, like. You were already on, like, defense. And I could tell this guy was just flirting. And he was only continuing because you were engaging with him. But you were engaging with him. Not in, like, you want to him way, but like, what's. What's this guy? What does this guy want from me? So those were the two dudes.

[Ethan Klein]

What was the conversation like?

[AB]

I was pretty up, but I just remember the guy. I wanted to.

[Ethan Klein]

He wanted to. Harley.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Yeah.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

Is that how you recall it?

[Harley]

AB was on. AB was on the big cummy drug and he was probably looking at me and was like, even I would. Harley in this moment because I'm on Molly and that guy is trying to hard. But we were having like a.

[AB]

That's my vacation.

[Harley]

There was already. There was. And there was broken conversation because we left. I was like, the guy's with her, he's doing the. The bit there. And AB was like, no, he was trying to you.

[Nate]

So you.

[Harley]

I was like, no, no, he. He wasn't trying to me. He. Maybe he would have. But that's not what it. That's not what it is, though. He was doing like a thing.

[Ethan Klein]

So you. You're still standing by the story that they were fucking with you, Both of them. And ab, not being a Shambhala goer, completely misunderstood the situation. And I will say.

[Harley]

Do you think. Here are the facts. We're at 3am at the Grove. Do you believe one Frenchman came over asking for directions to the Grove in the most cartoonish French accent, literally dressed like a hiker to meet his friends. There's literally a stage right here. The only writing anywhere is on this big stage that says the Grove, and it's right next to us. And he's like, I am looking for me Ami.

[Ethan Klein]

I guess I don't understand. What's the joke?

[Harley]

It's the joke.

[AB]

Exactly.

[Harley]

Is this. This is the joke. So when AB was like, let's go ask him.

[AB]

I was like, no, no, exactly.

[Harley]

Because he's not gonna tell you.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, absolutely.

[Harley]

We're gonna be the tastiest morsel of falling for it, even. This whole thing is the most beautiful outcome you can get when doing an acid bit like this. Like, people do this on acid to other people.

[Hila Klein]

So they're just strolling for no reason.

[Harley]

For no reason.

[Hila Klein]

It's not even like to mess with your height.

[Ethan Klein]

But it's not that weird, though. It's not something that would mess with you. It seems like something that you could just not even think about and then move on.

[AB]

But also, that's. I know, like, we're saying we're Doc and Marty, but there's like four minions over there. There's like a bunch of people like Lorax, whatever. Yeah, there's. Everyone is like. Like, we are very vanilla. I'm aware of that. I Didn't think everyone's like, oh, I want to take pictures with us.

[Ethan Klein]

I think you have a good point. That at 3am it's like, oh, what's with this French guy asking direction. But at the same time, I just don't understand the joke, you know, even that it's bizarre enough to even be.

[Hila Klein]

There is a poll. There's a poll up.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, before you vote, I will also submit this evidence. Is that.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Couldn't the joke just be that he's doing a goofy accent?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, but like, what? You go out of your way to be like, hey, oh, I'm French, thanks.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Like, you do that all the time.

[AB]

A French accent, though, in Canada.

[Ethan Klein]

When do I ever die French? But just on a show where people are watching me.

[Hila Klein]

Not just going in real life, just going to random.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

It's a performance, like Harley explained. It's like they're doing a.

[Ethan Klein]

Another exhibit of evidence, not saying it's a good bit. One of the people whose story's being submitted is this man here on my screen.

[Harley]

I look like a guy that just got fucked at Shambhala.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

You swore you would.

[Nate]

Gnarly.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah. And if I believe it's over again,

[AB]

I have some other information as well. One, because I thought he was just on acid and the next day he would be like, oh, yeah, that was crazy of me to think. I asked him in the morning and he stuck by his guns. Obviously, when we explain the situation to Tyler. Yeah, Tyler agreed with me.

[Harley]

Okay.

[Ethan Klein]

Also, I said to Ab.

[Harley]

I have more spoke to Tyler. I said, just so you know, this type of person is Tyler. So he's not going to give you the right answer because that sounds.

[Hila Klein]

Okay, that's getting paranoid.

[Harley]

Yeah, I understand what you guys are saying, but like, it is. It is. Like when I. When I went.

[Ethan Klein]

So you think Tyler with you?

[Harley]

No, he took the side of the bit. They were. It is normal to ask for directions to the Grove at 3am when you are standing at the grove and you're looking for your friends and you have this French accent that I'll tell you, doesn't exist.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay, well, you do speak French, right? So, I mean, there is that authority. Yeah, I need.

[AB]

I. I sent.

[Harley]

He didn't come over. Like, do you know where the stage.

[Ethan Klein]

The Grove is? Stage, Grove.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

He was like.

[AB]

He was like super friendly. He was like super friendly. He was super friendly. He's like, I'm sorry, do you know where the grove is? That was.

[Harley]

I will say that's you. You're making him chiller than that.

[Ethan Klein]

He Wasn't that chill, dude, Listen, between Acid and Molly, I would go trust Molly. But also, Harley is an experienced, experienced drug user and festival goer. You are virgin, so to speak, right?

[Hila Klein]

Were there other incidents while you were there? Ab. Were there other incidents?

[AB]

Yes.

[Caller]

Here.

[AB]

So I sent this picture. This is the same night. Me and Harley don't have a lot of footage together because it's either one or the other recording because it's just the two of us. Tyler was always in bed.

[Ethan Klein]

What did you send?

[AB]

I sent a picture right here.

[Ethan Klein]

And Discord, I don't see it. What the fuck? I don't see it.

[Hila Klein]

You trippin.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Wrong, Discord.

[AB]

I think I sent it to the Frenchman. No, I got it.

[Ethan Klein]

So what are we looking at here?

[AB]

So there was a fan, a really nice fan who we met earlier in the day. And so then I saw her while we were out and I was like, oh, this is perfect. We get a picture of Doc, a video of Doc and Marty for a sec. She holds the camera up for like, 10 seconds. 10 seconds of me and Harley just, like, looking off. So we get footage. She was very nice, Harley. He's telling me in this moment. He gets in my ear, he goes, get your phone from her right now.

[Kate]

And I'm like, what?

[AB]

He's like, get your phone from her. I was like, all right, thank you so much. And I'm like, why'd you have me take her phone? We need footage of us. He goes, because she's trying to enjoy her night. I'm like, dude, what? Which is very sweet.

[Harley]

Actually true. Actually true. He asked, there was a girl and she was family. And she. At a certain point, he was like, can you get footage of us? Film us for like, yes, like, a bit. So she went and she filmed us for about 10 seconds.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Harley]

And it was just during. We're like a drop at Extreme Decision at the Village. It's very. It's like one of the peak moments. If she is a fan of this type of music, okay, this might be the most important concert. This is happening the whole weekend. So I was like, that's enough. 10 seconds. Let's take it.

[Ethan Klein]

Let's take it back. Harley makes a good point, Ab, because again, he is the experienced Shambhalai

[Hila Klein]

on a mission to get content. What happened to content brain?

[Ethan Klein]

We're not talking content. We're talking about paranoid. If he's being paranoid or not. Right?

[AB]

But I'm. Guys, I'm telling you, it was like 10 seconds. I'm sure it was. It was the girl.

[Harley]

This Wasn't paranoid though. This was me, actually. This actually proves how conscious I was.

[AB]

I. I'm like the least. Like, I do not want to inconvenience anyone. Like, I believe in, but, you know,

[Ethan Klein]

not what you do.

[AB]

But I just, I. She just walked onto the dance floor. It wasn't like she was there. And I like, grabbed.

[Ethan Klein]

She was on the dance floor, she

[AB]

just walked up, she gave us a hug. She just got there.

[Hila Klein]

And if she's a fan, she probably loved helping you.

[AB]

Yes, yes. That's what I'm saying. You're saying she's a fan of Shambhala,

[Harley]

like, and so I didn't.

[AB]

She posted Shambhala side quest complete when she met us on Reddit.

[Harley]

Yes. And I felt that she was a fan. So I think, like, we could have literally asked her. We could have been like, oh, will you come film AB for an hour?

[Ethan Klein]

She'd be like, sure, yeah, yeah, course you could ask.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[AB]

Hold on. Your honor, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on.

[Harley]

It is just 10 seconds. We feel the video was missing. Us dancing. Is there. Do we need more footage of us dancing?

[Ethan Klein]

That's what you guys fought about? Yeah.

[AB]

What about all the fans that were there you towered over and go, hey, I'm recording you.

[Hila Klein]

Is it okay?

[Harley]

Yeah, they love that. I gotta tell them. I gotta tell them they're on camera.

[AB]

No, I'm glad you did, but I'm just saying, like, it wasn't like we didn't inconvenience anyone else that night.

[Ethan Klein]

You guys talked about that. You had a real fight. This is what it was over.

[Harley]

Yeah, yeah, no, he was about the Frenchman.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, the fight was about the Frenchman?

[AB]

Yeah, yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

No adjacent, but we went, we went

[AB]

back to the trailer and changed because of this. Telling me we don't have to. No, no, it's fine. I'm like, bro, I feel like you're just going to get paranoid about everyone

[Harley]

there, but you want, you want my. You want my Ultra Pro take right here at this exact moment in time?

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah.

[Harley]

AB was going through a Molly downer. I was, I was vibing, surfing on acid. It's going to last way longer's like destroyed, beaten. All of a sudden, my laugh's not fun anymore. The music kind of sucks.

[Gabe]

True.

[Ethan Klein]

Like that does happen.

[Harley]

The acid, Back to the future costume

[Ethan Klein]

type acid last way longer than. Is that true? Were you coming off the peak of the Molly?

[AB]

I. I was stocked and ready to go anytime I was down there.

[Ethan Klein]

No, you can't. But Molly's not like that. You Kind of bust your. Not once

[Harley]

I told him he's scraping his brain. I was like, you're scraping your brain. We have to get like, HTP5 or whatever. That's it.

[Ethan Klein]

Just like Lo unloads all of the serotonin and then you. I got to get returning. Oh, you did it, though. You did do it.

[Hila Klein]

He.

[Harley]

No, he did. He actually maintained high energy and a positive attitude the entire time. So where we had particularly annoying at this part.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah. Well, there it is. Real fights going down at Chambala, but pieces being made. Resolution. How was the music, ab? You like the music?

[AB]

Yeah, no, I did.

[Ethan Klein]

And you dance a lot?

[AB]

Yeah. All jokes aside, it was a really cool experience, and I'm glad I did it with Harley. Like, Harley yelling out in the middle of it. Like, the dance area at one point. Ab, you're liquid, bro. You're liquid. He's like.

[Ethan Klein]

He's like this.

[Harley]

The creator by the neck.

[AB]

Yeah, he.

[Harley]

I grabbed AB by the back of the neck like, a hundred times. And I was like, Ethan Klein was here right now. He himself to this.

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[AB]

I really wish.

[Ethan Klein]

Does that mean I would have liked it or hated it?

[Harley]

You would have just been. You would have been tripping balls, dude.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, I guess I would have been probably. If I was on acid.

[Harley]

You would have been nutting and busting.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, yeah. Now you're speaking my language.

[Harley]

You know, at the beginning of the call in episode, you were doing, like, a little dance thing while the dance music was playing and you were doing, like, these little silly, like, invisible DJ dance moves and stuff. That's literally what I do on the dance floor.

[Ethan Klein]

Ghost DJing.

[Gabe]

Yeah.

[Harley]

Yeah. 70 of the time. Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

All right, so where are we at

[Harley]

on the poll that to like, I do. I do. Instead of, like, fake headphones and. And scratching, I turned it into a. It's a fake brush and like a gun. Don't know why that happened.

[Ethan Klein]

What?

[Hila Klein]

What?

[Harley]

Yeah, it's like instead of doing this, you were doing that. I like, oh, I brushed my hair.

[Ethan Klein]

It turns into. It turns into that motion.

[Harley]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly.

[Ethan Klein]

Might be confusing, but I find that interesting because. Dan, what's the pull at.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

The guy on acid has 54% to the guy on Molly 46.

[Ethan Klein]

So, I mean, really no resolution tipping towards the acid. But I. Well, I would kill to talk to that French man, to hear from his perspective.

[Harley]

Absolutely, he would love that. He would love that. He would be so happy that it got this big.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, listen, if you are that Frenchman, reach out.

[AB]

I have more evidence.

[Ethan Klein]

Go on, go on, go on. We're running out of time, so be quick. No, go on.

[Nate]

Okay.

[AB]

So anytime I pull out my camera, I don't know how the people, like the workers lasered in on me. They got me right away, like on stage, off stage, wherever I was. And so when we were getting that little montage of us dancing his Doc and Marty, some guy came up to us and took the camera and. Or not took the camera, but told us put down the camera.

[Gabe]

And then.

[AB]

And then Harley's like, what? Well, what do we got to do?

[Harley]

Because I didn't hear him. So I went up to ab. I was like, what did that guy say to you?

[AB]

Oh, God, here we go.

[Harley]

He's said, we got to put the cat. Yeah. And he was like, here we go again.

[AB]

I was like, here we go again.

[Harley]

And I was like, no, that's real.

[AB]

And then he, like, thought about for a second. He goes, okay, yeah, that checks out.

[Harley]

Once again, showing that my brain was.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, I don't know. That's not evident.

[Hila Klein]

We don't have enough. Only the Frenchman.

[Ethan Klein]

All right, well, any who. There's a whole. There's a whole hour long cut that A.B. and Harley. I don't know how much Harley did, but AB put it together to. Harley, did you do anything or. Yeah, I did.

[Harley]

I booked the rv.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, I mean, it wasn't your job to be fair. I just was. I just want to give you credit if you did editing, but you were. I mean, you were the. You were the showman.

[AB]

Yeah, I know he did. We talked through a lot of it. Like every day we were passing us.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay, well, so there's an hour long cut for members. Go check it out. It's gonna be fun. You're gonna love it. Thank you to my Shamba lights. Harley was there next year.

[Harley]

Are you coming? You coming?

[Ethan Klein]

Let's see where I'm there.

[Harley]

So you could have fun there.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, right, bro, that's.

[Harley]

I swear, I swear to God I would live.

[Ethan Klein]

That is the last place I'd ever want to be.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

So Bring your steam deck.

[Ethan Klein]

Honestly, that says I brought mine,

[Harley]

though. Yeah, no, but I had it just in case. Yeah, but you guys, you'd have fun there sober, I swear.

[Ethan Klein]

So let's talk next year. But AB well done out there on the field.

[Hila Klein]

Thank you.

[Ethan Klein]

Putting his body on the line for the show. Thank you, Harley, for calling in and just being yourself.

[Dan]

Thank you.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

And we'll see you in a little bit on After Dark. I did like the yala y y abdallah. Very good. Very good birch idea. Okay, goodbye, guys.

[Hila Klein]

All right.

[Ethan Klein]

Bye, Harley. There we go. If that's not enough Harley for you, stay tuned because after coming up right next, why don't we thank some of our lovely fans, Dan, and get the heck out of here?

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Okay, sure. Let me thank the following lucid luck said, someone tell Tom he has the exact same smile as Sean Williams Scott and it's all I see when he speaks. Also, he's got. He's got daughters.

[Tom]

He's got.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, you know, I gotta get home. I got daughters.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

I'd love to come, but.

[AB]

I got daughters.

[Nate]

I sell ads.

[Ethan Klein]

I sell ads and I've got daughters and I. I take piano lessons and I like to make beats at home. Daughters.

[Nate]

I hate all of you.

[Ethan Klein]

I don't know all of you.

[AB]

All right.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Jewel said. Hi, family. I made the fan art of slow that Ethan showed on the podcast.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, I love it. I'm going to Frank.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

No more free fan art.

[Hila Klein]

Love it.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

In solidarity with Tom.

[Tom]

Just kidding.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

I'm drawing not in a family guild crest.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, how fun. That's sick.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

I hope one day I can buy the game and play a Angels on Nora.

[Ethan Klein]

What do you mean one day by the game? It's 20 bucks.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Yeah, and they donated 50 for this.

[Ethan Klein]

You just gave 50 bucks. You just got your whole. You just bought the game.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Maybe they don't have a PC that could play it or something.

[Ethan Klein]

That's true. That's true. Well, thank you. That's such a generous donation. We love you. And we love you, Art.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Brandon said. Hey, fam. I have a short request for Teddy Fresh. Could there possibly be a refresh of the uphill battle sweater? I know that's a deep, but it's legit. Get one of my all time.

[Hila Klein]

You know, I. I love it. I love it too, but we restocked it like three times, so sometimes I feel like.

[Ethan Klein]

Was it selling out every time it did?

[Harley]

No.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Yeah, maybe there's a four.

[Hila Klein]

Sounds like maybe it's been long enough, though. It's been a few years.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Well, thank you, Brandon.

[Hila Klein]

What was your name?

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Brandon.

[Hila Klein]

Brandon. Yeah, we might do it for Brandon.

[Ethan Klein]

All right, there it is.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

GTS R donated $10 and sent nothing.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, I'm a selfless person. Thank you so much.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Chair T skibidi said, did you know if you don't fart and have holes in your intestines, your body cavity fills with fart gas? That's why I'm in the hospital. Farts are important family.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, fartless.

[Hila Klein]

What?

[AB]

They're fartless.

[Ethan Klein]

Open the valve, folks. You gotta open the valve.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Well, I hope you're okay.

[Ethan Klein]

That sounds like this man can't fart.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Electric lizard said. Dan you. You coward. I was a VIP caller that you couldn't hear yesterday. I don't know what happened, but I do know that I look forward to seeing you in court.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, I mean, listen, I'm sorry, hold up.

[Hila Klein]

Watch your language.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

But I'm ready. I'm ready for you. Wills Burners have been watching since the early H3 days. I started my renovation business a year ago and just got my first six figure job. Hey.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

My way is saying thanks for all the content that got me through a lot of tough times.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, thank you, sir.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Thank you, Will Burner M said Wednesday was my 30th. Can I get a shout out to 30?

[Ethan Klein]

They're feeling you.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

They're feeling happy, healthy, and like a human being.

[Ethan Klein]

Very good. What better on your 30th. Cherish it. You'll be 41 day.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Yeah, sooner than you think. Mac says. Mac, not Mac.

[Ethan Klein]

You'll be an orange Tom's gauge. You might give him be 60 someday. Yeah, 70. Moving on, pushing on 60. There. He looks good for his age, doesn't he?

[Nate]

Yeah, for 68.

[Ethan Klein]

How old does Tom look to you, Gabe?

[Gabe]

I think he looks like he's 45. 50.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, and me. Dude, that's a whole. Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop. And how old do I look?

[Gabe]

I think you look like you're 35. 40. Let's say 40.

[Ethan Klein]

No, that's what I'm talking about. Gabe has eyes that. That see everything. Yeah, I'm 41. I just turned 41. So you're right on the money. And then Tom, he kind of nailed your ass.

[Nate]

48.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, Gabe is like a time hawk. Gabe, how old does Dan look? Let's keep it going, see how accurate you are.

[Gabe]

Let's see. Dan. Dan. I'd say 35.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, mad Gabe, thank you.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

It's not that far off.

[Ethan Klein]

What about AB? How old's AB?

[Gabe]

AB, I'd say 30 or. 30.

[Ethan Klein]

That's exactly your age, isn't it?

[AB]

I wish. 33, 4.

[Gabe]

You wish.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Come on, it's starting to get blurry.

[AB]

In your 30s, you're not bad.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Oftentimes.

[Ethan Klein]

Okay. And one more. Nate or no. Love. Do. Love.

[Gabe]

Love. I'm in love. I'd say. I'd say 32.

[Kate]

Wow.

[Gabe]

Thank you.

[Ethan Klein]

Love is actually a young man. What do you push it?

[Gabe]

They.

[Ethan Klein]

25. 25? Yeah.

[AB]

It's the glass. It's glasses.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, you're. You're amongst that. You're elders.

[Tom]

Yes.

[Ethan Klein]

But overall, incredible. Incredible work. Really? Yeah. Oh, you're good at that, right? We're gonna have to have Gabe guess Pacman's age on Monday. Just be his, like your superpower. Go ahead, Dan Mack.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Oh, I read this. Hi, friends. The user is freakfish on eq. Okay.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Shout out.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Freakfish.

[Ethan Klein]

I see you hit me up for a guild invite.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Lyric Page said, hi. I'm 26 today. And another black American woman viewer. Since we're keeping tally these days. Lol.

[Ethan Klein]

Gotta keep tally.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Ethan, would you ever get even a tiny bit of Botox? Soften up your face and get closer to Chad.

[Ethan Klein]

Eve, come on, bro. Get out of here. Get closer to Chad.

[AB]

Hold on.

[Nate]

They say.

[Ethan Klein]

Not that you need it.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

King.

[Ethan Klein]

They say to get closer to chat to Chad.

[Hila Klein]

Ethan.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, well, both of.

[Hila Klein]

He's already chatty.

[Ethan Klein]

Stop it. What's next? Besides the obvious? Besides the obvious. What's the most up thing about you?

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

They said also how it would affect your Tourette's. I don't know if it would have any effect on that.

[Ethan Klein]

My Tourette's is cured. I injected poison in my face and now I don't tick.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Maybe it stiffens you, so you. Your muscles, you can't twitch.

[Ethan Klein]

I twitch, but you just can't see it, right? Exactly.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Maybe Rainbow Bright said.

[Ethan Klein]

Wait, hold on.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Wait. I should have.

[Ethan Klein]

Gallia's suggesting it for a segment that I get Botox and it lasts four to five months. Honestly, it's crazy enough that it might be a good idea, but I don't. I don't. So it is kind of. The thing is, I have to walk around with that.

[Nate]

It is pretty funny.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

It is.

[Ethan Klein]

It is funny. Like it is. It is kind of crazy. I think you're gonna get hooked. Oh, if you start.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Yeah.

[Ethan Klein]

No, I have to go down. I think you're gonna get used to yourself looking like.

[Hila Klein]

Guys, we have enough segments. We have a long list of segments.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

That's true.

[Ethan Klein]

Where are they? You know, some people put the people Mech.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

You know what?

[Ethan Klein]

Move on.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

He told me to move on.

[AB]

Dan, wait. Can I read one A super chat.

[Ethan Klein]

No, it's.

[Gabe]

It's important.

[AB]

It's very important.

[Ethan Klein]

Campaign.

[AB]

Colin said they didn't include it in the recap, but AB And Harley came by my dispensary in Vancouver and I hooked them up with hash. Great to meet y'.

[Caller]

All.

[AB]

You are in the extended version.

[Ethan Klein]

I'm sorry, I had.

[AB]

I had to cut a lot. That's why, like, there's a weird part where my voice is sped up. I was just trying to shorten it for the show, but it won't be. Be like that in the.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Okay.

[AB]

The.

[Ethan Klein]

I. I gave AB a hard 20 minute, so. You did well. You did very well.

[AB]

I wasn't going to say that you did, but.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, no, it's fine. But you did good. I mean, I think it came out really nice for the main show consumption. And if anybody wants any additional footage, it's. The whole thing's there. Yeah.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Okay. Almost at the bottom here, that last one. By the way, uh, Lyric. We. We didn't wish them a Happy birthday. They're 26, so.

[Ethan Klein]

26.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

And they also. They donated $100.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, my goodness.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Maybe you do have to get the Botox. That was their suggestion.

[Caller]

Well, let's.

[Ethan Klein]

Let's put 100g. Put it in the.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

I was kidding.

[Ethan Klein]

Ideas.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Rainbow Bright said, my husband and I met AB and Harley at Chamb. At Chamb. And I was, like, freaking out. So excited to meet AB and my husband is like, bro, the. Break the bacon guy.

[Ethan Klein]

Epic.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

To Harley. Shout out to the boys, though. They were sweethearts.

[Ethan Klein]

They are.

[Hila Klein]

There you go.

[Ethan Klein]

They are.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Devin. Luke Harrington said, let's say I wanted to play EverQuest. What's the ETA on the ad? Slash sponsorship, Tom.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, that's what I'm getting. A lot of inquiries like that. You better tell those EverQuest people to get their shit together.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

I think it might happen together this week. I think it might happen this week.

[Nate]

Not next week, but soon. Be patient. Don't play yet is the message.

[Ethan Klein]

We're working on an affiliate thing, hopefully, right? Yeah, I'm working on an affiliate thing. I'm just trying to lock it up with them, but it's coming along slower than I want.

[Nate]

He just emailed me back.

[Gabe]

We'll talk later.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, talk later.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

I'm too busy right now.

[Ethan Klein]

I got.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

I got daughters. Mikey Mouse said to upgrade your vip. You have to cancel your current and then wait till it runs out and then you can switch. If that's true. That's insanely stupid.

[Hila Klein]

Really.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

That was, I think, referencing that earlier vip.

[Ethan Klein]

What?

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

An earlier super chatter said they were trying to upgrade to vip, that they were a normal member but they didn't have the option. This person is saying to upgrade, you have to cancel it, wait for it to run out and then resubscribe as a VIP.

[Ethan Klein]

That's such good planning by YouTube that

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

it can't be true.

[Ethan Klein]

True, but it might be. It might be, but it might be.

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

All right, well, listen, thank you to everybody who donated, thank you to everybody who watched and we'll be back next week. And in the meantime, Ethan, I'm gonna send it back to you.

[Ethan Klein]

Well, thanks, Dan. Sending it on back to me so I can set it on over to the folks at After Dark. That's right, your favorites Kate, Harley and David. Going live After Dark today. Galia's visiting. How nice is that? Where's Gallia?

[Dan]

Who?

[Caller]

She's visiting.

[AB]

Who?

[Ethan Klein]

Harley.

[Hila Klein]

What? What do you mean?

[Ethan Klein]

I'm just reading what they wrote. They said Gallia's visiting and we're ready.

[Hila Klein]

She's coming to LA to us next week.

[Ethan Klein]

Oh, I thought they're saying to be on the show. Well, what's that have to do with. Well, if she's writing. No, she's visiting A.D. what did you mean by this? I know she's going to be on the show.

[Nate]

Is she in the building?

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

Okay, she's right behind you.

[Ethan Klein]

Yes. Oh, no, she's gonna be on A.D. okay.

[Gabe]

Okay.

[Ethan Klein]

I don't know if she's calling in. Are you with Carly?

[Moderator/Chat Moderator]

She's just gonna call. Yeah, they live on opposite sides.

[Ethan Klein]

She's calling in. So. So she's calling. Well, it was confusing because she is actually coming.

[Hila Klein]

Yeah, that's why I'm like, yes, she's visiting and you know about it.

[Ethan Klein]

Yeah, yeah, I'm doing my best here. I got all kinds of threads. So anyway, Gallia is going to be there and they are raiding your dating profiles. Oh, boy, that sounds fun. So there it is. I mean, who better to get advice from than Harley, Kate and David? Come on, everybody. It's after dark in the H3 show. Thanks for watching. Hope you have a great weekend and we'll be back on Monday for another week of shows. Thanks for watching, everybody. Thank you to Gabo joining us. Thank you to Tommy for coming and joining us and thank you to everybody for being here. I love all you. Have a great weekend, everyone.