Episode Overview

Episode Title: Adam Schafer: The Shocking Stat That Explains Why Most Trainers Stay Broke
Podcast: Habits and Hustle
Host: Jennifer Cohen
Guest: Adam Schafer
Air Date: October 17, 2025

This episode dives into the hidden pitfalls of the personal training industry, the surprising statistics regarding trainer-client relationships, and what separates lasting professional success from self-sabotage. Through candid discussion, Adam Schafer, fitness industry leader and Mind Pump podcast co-host, explores how critical self-belief, confidence, and resisting temptation are not just for trainers, but for anyone striving for fulfillment in work and relationships.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

The Shocking Stat about Trainers and Clients

• Adam Schafer reveals: "I don't know if people know the stats on this, but like 70 something percent of trainers sleep with their clients. So it's a very like 70%. 70%." (01:50)
  • Only doctors and nurses (in hospitals) surpass trainers in terms of inter-industry infidelity.
  • Both male and female trainers are involved, but it’s notably more common among male trainers with female clients (02:27).
• Adam's advice to trainers:
  • Professional success hinges on resisting the temptation: "The difference between you being a decent, okay, trainer and a very successful one is can you resist the temptation to sleep with your clients... that's the beginning of the end for you. You'll never be that successful if you do that." (02:53)

Integrity, Reputation, and Success

• Sleeping with clients leads to a slippery slope—“You open Pandora's box... Then you get a reputation around that." (03:30)
• The best paying and highest value clients seek professionalism and character, not blurred boundaries.
• Damaged reputation among peers can derail career advancement; former peers may lose respect, particularly when moving into managerial roles (04:00).
  • Notable quote: "Imagine if I was a trainer who slept with all the ladies in the gym and then now I'm your boss telling you what to do... it'll kill your career." (04:14)

The Role of Confidence (in Life, Love, and Work)

• Jennifer Cohen's take: "Confidence is really the gateway for anything... If you're confident and you hold yourself in a certain way... you're 100 times more attractive." (06:11)
• Adam emphasizes genuine self-belief is more powerful than hyped-up motivation: "Motivation is [nothing], self belief is everything." (06:54)
• Partners with high self-confidence promote healthier, more trusting relationships—Adam gives his own relationship as an example, crediting Katrina’s (his partner's) self-worth as essential for their 13+ years together (08:22).

Maintaining Healthy, Lasting Relationships

• Overcoming jealousy is key—Adam and Katrina’s philosophy: "If you're going to cheat, you're going to cheat. Me being jealous about it... is not going to stop it or start it." (04:49)
• Modern relationship struggles are addressed—particularly the challenge of repeating negative patterns, fueled by seeking short-term highs from superficial connections (11:45–13:00).
• Adam’s experience: Their relationship grew stronger over time, not fading after the "honeymoon phase" (08:32).
  • Notable quote: "This is no bullshit. I am more physically attracted to her today. We have better sex today...It just keeps getting better and better." (08:33)

Breaking Unhealthy Patterns—Attraction and Partner Choice

• Many people repeatedly date the wrong type due to their unresolved insecurities or addiction to short-term validation (12:35–13:00).
• Adam suggests flipping priorities: Focus on character traits you truly want (confidence, growth-mindset, independence) instead of superficial qualities.
  • Advice: "Be open to dating in a direction that you probably don't think you would date in." (14:31)
• Changing ingrained attraction patterns is comparable to addiction recovery—a person must want real change and be willing to endure discomfort and 'withdrawal' from familiar, but destructive habits (16:09–17:24).
  • Notable quote: "Just like somebody who is addicted to a drug...You're gonna want to fall back in those behaviors...You have to become aware that that's what that person is for you." (16:19)
  • The longer the negative pattern persists, the harder it is to break: "The longer you've done that behavior and habit, the harder and the greater the withdrawal is going to be when you get out of it." (17:24)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On trainer-client dynamics:
  "I don't know if people know the stats on this, but like 70 something percent of trainers sleep with their clients. The only thing that's higher in infidelity is hospitals."
  — Adam Schafer (01:50)

• Differentiating successful trainers:
  "The difference between you being a decent, okay, trainer and a very successful one is can you resist the temptation to sleep with your clients..."
  — Adam Schafer (02:53)

• On reputational risk:
  "Imagine if I was a trainer who slept with all the ladies in the gym and then now I'm your boss telling you what to do. It's like, I get no respect for my female trainers. I'm gonna get no. And most of my... male trainers may not give me respect because of who I am."
  — Adam Schafer (04:14)

• On confidence:
  "If you're even like kind of good looking, but not really. If you're confident and you hold yourself in a certain way and you, and you believe in yourself, you're 100 times more attractive."
  — Jennifer Cohen (06:11)

• Self-belief over motivation:
  "Motivation is... self belief is everything."
  — Adam Schafer (06:54)

• On lasting relationships:
  "I'm more physically attracted to her today. We have better sex today...It just keeps getting better and better and better and better."
  — Adam Schafer, about his long-term partner Katrina (08:33)

• On breaking the cycle:
  "You have to want to change bad. Just like somebody who is addicted to a drug who says, I know this habit is bad for me, I need to quit. It's going to be hard... You have to be willing to do that first."
  — Adam Schafer (16:19–17:24)

Important Timestamps

• 01:50 – Adam shares the shocking stat about trainers and clients.
• 02:53 – Why resisting temptation is crucial for trainer success.
• 03:30–04:14 – Consequences of reputation and peer relationships.
• 06:11–07:03 – Importance of confidence and self-belief.
• 08:22–09:35 – Adam and Katrina’s relationship philosophy; growing attraction over time.
• 11:45–13:00 – Patterns in modern dating and attraction.
• 14:31–15:05 – How to pivot your dating approach after self-awareness.
• 16:09–17:24 – Breaking negative attraction patterns compared to addiction recovery.

Conclusion

This episode offers a raw, honest look at the fitness industry, the importance of professional boundaries, and the psychological underpinnings of relationship patterns. Adam Schafer’s candid storytelling and actionable advice—on both career and personal fulfillment—emphasize the enduring value of character, confidence, and conscious choice. Whether you're a trainer aiming for more, or anyone seeking healthier relationships, the lessons shared resonate far beyond the gym.