Podcast Summary: Habits and Hustle – Episode 506

The Success Skill Everyone Overlooks

Host: Jen Cohen
Date: November 28, 2025

Episode Overview

In this concise, high-impact episode, Jen Cohen pulls back the curtain on a crucial yet under-discussed factor in personal and professional success: likability. Addressing questions from her listeners and her own experiences, Jen explains why being likable outpaces technical skill in creating opportunities and unlocking doors. She cuts through common misconceptions, offering practical, science-backed tips to amplify likability—no faking or people-pleasing required.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Why Likability Matters More Than Ever

• Likability trumps talent and experience when it comes to advancing in business and life.
• Memorable Quote:

  "You could be the most talented, hardworking, brilliant person in your industry. But if people don't like you, they won't want to work with you…Being competent gets you noticed. Being likable gets you chosen." (03:02)

• Likability isn't about being everyone’s best friend; it's about being someone others genuinely want in the room.

2. Five Simple Ways to Be More Likable

2.1 Smile More

• Even a small action like smiling creates instant warmth and approachability.
• Why it works: Nonverbal cues (like smiling) build rapport quicker than words.
• Memorable Quote:

  "Body language is more important than actually the words coming out of your mouth." (04:13)

2.2 Remember Names

• Using someone’s name demonstrates respect and makes people feel valued.
• Memorable Quote:

  "Using someone's name activates reward centers in the brain. It makes people feel seen, valued, and actually, most importantly, respected." (04:37)

• Small details leave a big impact; most people skip this step, so it sets you apart.

2.3 Ask More Questions, Talk Less

• Curiosity signals confidence and genuine interest.
• Jen’s 70/30 Rule: Listen 70% of the time, talk 30%.

  "Curiosity is confidence. It shows you're not self-absorbed…The best conversationalists do less talking and way more listening." (07:23)

• Asking thoughtful questions builds faster, deeper connections.

2.4 Give Specific, Authentic Compliments

• Generic flattery falls flat; specificity signals observation and sincerity.
• Focus on effort, mindset, or unique skills—not just appearance.
• Memorable Quote:

  "Authenticity is much different than flattery. People can feel the difference." (08:36)

2.5 The Power of True Listening

• Real, undistracted presence is rare and powerful.
• Listening is a “secret weapon” that builds trust quicker than any sales pitch.
• Memorable Quote:

  "Presence is power. It signals confidence and respect… In a world addicted to distraction, your full attention is your competitive edge." (09:00)

3. Common Misconceptions Debunked

• Likability ≠ People Pleasing:
  You don’t need to agree with everyone or be a doormat to be likable. Jen stresses that overdoing people-pleasing is, in fact, unlikable. (03:14)
• Likability isn’t Fake:
  It’s not about faking your way to popularity, but about making intentional, genuine choices that compound into opportunities. (09:35)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “Likability builds trust and trust creates opportunity. Simple as that.” (01:56)
• “Smile more, remember people's names, ask real questions, and give genuine compliments and listen like it matters. It's pretty common sense, but sometimes they say common sense isn't so common.” (09:35)
• "If people don't like you, it doesn't matter [how talented you are]." (09:28)

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 03:02 – Why likability gets you chosen over competence
• 03:41 – The science behind smiling and first impressions
• 04:28 – Why using names makes a difference
• 07:23 – 70/30 listening rule and conversational curiosity
• 08:36 – Authentic versus fake compliments
• 09:00 – Listening as a secret weapon
• 09:35 – Likability recap and amplifying your strengths

Final Takeaways

• Jen’s actionable strategies highlight that likability is neither accidental nor superficial. Every interaction is an opportunity to compound your competence and credibility with warmth, curiosity, and presence.
• The most overlooked success skill? If you want opportunity, trust, and real connections, work on being genuinely likable—smile, remember names, ask thoughtful questions, give authentic compliments, and, above all, listen.

Host’s Parting Wisdom:

“Likability amplifies. Whatever your skill set or intelligence or talent, it actually gets magnified when people actually like you and want to be around you.” (09:39)

This episode is a practical blueprint for anyone aiming to create more opportunities and build lasting relationships—no matter their industry or aspirations.