Episode 536: How Working Out and Nutrition Build Confidence Faster Than Therapy and Affirmations

Summary

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Podcast Summary: Habits and Hustle

Episode 536: How Working Out and Nutrition Build Confidence Faster Than Therapy and Affirmations
Host: Jen Cohen
Guest/Co-Host: Shani
Date: March 13, 2026

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Main Theme

This solo edition (with returning co-host Shani) explores the idea that working out and focusing on nutrition offer faster, more tangible pathways to genuine self-confidence than traditional therapy or affirmations. Jen and Shani have an open, candid conversation about their personal experiences with fitness, food, body image, and how actionable habits outperform the “talking routes” commonly prescribed for boosting self-esteem.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

The Relationship Between Nutrition, Working Out, and Confidence

• Jen emphasizes that both nutrition and exercise are crucial, but nutrition is the larger driver of physical outcomes.

  • “You can literally work out like a fiend 24 hours a day. But if you're not, like, watching what you put in your mouth, guess what happens?” (01:16)
  • Shani: "You gain weight."
  • Jen: "You gain weight." (01:42)

• Over-Exercising Can Backfire:

  • Intense workouts can increase hunger and, paradoxically, hinder progress if not matched with controlled eating.
  • “The more you work out, the hungrier you get… for my mental health, I need to work out intensely… but then I end up eating way more than I normally would, and therefore it becomes this whole, like, vicious cycle.” (01:47-02:54)

• Structured Eating and Scheduled Habits Help:

  • Jen shares that she maintains regular eating and exercise times to keep herself in check and reduce compulsive eating:
  • “I obsess over food anyway...I have everything that I...created my day around… there’s walls and boundaries.” (03:49)

• Staying Busy Cuts Snacking:

  • Shani notes that being busy minimizes snacking: “If I'm busy doing other things, I literally won't snack.” (03:20)
  • Jen adds: “Being busy does help cut the calories.” (03:29)

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Emotional Eating & Relationship Triggers

• Weight Fluctuates With Life Changes:

  • Shani describes gaining weight after falling in love and moving, but having confidence she can lose it because she knows the habits that work for her.
  • “I've gained and lost weight so many times. I'm very comfortable and confident in this.” (07:44)

• Relationship Eating Patterns:

  • New relationships can disrupt eating and exercise habits, with socializing and shared indulgence leading to weight gain.
  • Jen: “When people start...in a new relationship, a lot of times they gain weight...you're social, you socialize around food...” (06:18)

• Partners’ Diets Influence Each Other:

  • Shani’s boyfriend’s high-calorie habits (e.g., “one to three liters of goat milk a day” and treating pizza as health food) contrast with her own needs, illustrating how environment affects choices.
  • “I'd be a house if I lived with that guy, honest to God.” (14:00)

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On GLP-1 Weight Loss Drugs & Food “Noise”

• Not All Weight Loss Requires Medication:

  • Jen and Shani highlight their preference for building healthy habits over using drugs like GLP-1s, with Jen acknowledging food-obsession (“food noise”) as a struggle.
  • “You're the first person I've sat with probably in two years that's not on a GLP1...or...microdosing one right now.” (07:54)

• Volume Eating as a Tool:

  • Jen suggests high-volume, low-calorie foods (like huge salads) to satisfy the urge to eat without blowing calorie budgets.
  • “I will eat multiple times a day and I will have things with big volume because I think volume is really helpful if you're someone who has a lot of food noise and likes to eat.” (08:51)

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The Core: Confidence Is Built, Not Affirmed

• Fitness Beats Affirmations and Therapy for Confidence:

  • Jen asserts that confidence is a byproduct of hard, repeated actions—especially fitness routines:
    • “I believe fitness is a way bigger builder of confidence than therapy or affirmations.” (14:51)
    • “Fitness is the gateway drug to building self esteem, self confidence, self assurance.” (14:54)

• Affirmations Have Limits:

  • Saying positive things alone doesn’t change your core beliefs unless reinforced with felt experience:
    • “You can say to yourself a million times in the mirror, I'm great, I'm strong, I'm wonderful...but your brain knows what you believe...you can't lie to yourself.” (16:07)
    • “Confidence can't just be affirmed. It has to be earned. And the only way to earn it is to prove it to yourself that you can do hard things.” (15:57)

• Action is Essential:

  • Positive self-talk and therapy can play a supportive role, but “at the end of the day, it is about the action and is about the steps.” (19:10)
  • “If you just focus on working out, taking care of your body physically, your brain will catch up.” (18:59)
  • “Action behind the manifestation vision board,” not just the wish. (19:10)

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Sustainable Practices & Mindset Shifts

• Focus on Consistency and Process Over Perfection:

  • Jen advocates embracing “boring” habits and repetition as the surest path:
    • “Nothing works on doing something once in a while or occasionally… boring gets you to the finish line… it’s doing the same boring shit every single day. Even when you don't want to. You do it anyway.” (21:09)

• Moderation Beats Restriction:

  • Instead of making foods “taboo,” occasional indulgence and portion control lowers risk of bingeing and unhealthy fixation:
    • “If I deprive myself for so long and then I see a french fry, I will literally have nine orders of it...But now if I know I’m allowed to have french fries...then I’m much better in the portion control.” (12:29-13:09)

• Feed Muscle, Nurture Body:

  • Extreme caloric restriction backfires, both physically (starvation mode) and mentally (obsession).
    • “If you actually just ate like a, like a regular person...maybe a little more once in a while, it actually behooves you and it gets you way more results.” (11:40)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “Confidence is built in reps, hard reps, day after day, and consistency than just saying how great you think you are in the mirror.” — Jen (15:10)
• “Confidence can't just be affirmed. It has to be earned. And the only way to earn it is to prove it to yourself that you can do hard things.” — Jen (15:57)
• “If you just focus on working out, taking care of your body physically, your brain will catch up.” — Jen (18:59)
• “If you haven’t taken fitness seriously to some extent yet, you are remiss in getting the benefits. ...You will be astounded at how you see yourself six months from the day you started. But you have to be consistent.” — Jen (20:55)
• “Boring gets you to the finish line. Boring is what works. ...Do it anyway.” — Jen (21:09)
• Shani (on repeated cycles of weight loss and gain): “I've gained and lost weight so many times. I'm very comfortable and confident in this.” (07:44)

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Important Timestamps & Segments

• 01:16 – 02:54: Difference between working out and nutrition; the hunger trap of intense exercise
• 03:49 – 04:36: The power of routines and scheduled eating time
• 06:09 – 07:44: Relationship weight gain and how love, environment, and partner’s habits affect eating
• 07:54 – 08:51: Natural weight loss approach vs. GLP-1 drugs; food “noise” and coping strategies
• 14:34 – 16:07: Introduction of the main topic: why fitness builds confidence better than therapy/affirmations; “confidence is earned”
• 16:07 – 17:19: Discussing the limits of affirmations
• 18:59 – 21:09: Action as the foundation of confidence; consistency and “boring” routines as key
• 20:55 – 21:09: Call to action — commit to fitness, even if it’s not glamorous

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Conclusion & Final Takeaways

The episode argues powerfully that neither therapy nor affirmations alone can foster true confidence—the only proven route is consistent, disciplined action, especially through fitness and good nutrition. Personal narratives and honest humor make the message relatable and inspiring: everyone is susceptible to life’s ups and downs, but confidence comes from doing hard things and showing up for yourself day after day.

Jen’s parting mantra:

“Do it anyway. And that will help you with everything in your life.” (21:09)

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Bonus: Jen’s Book Club Announcement

• First book: The Courage to Be Disliked
• Purpose: Monthly reading as personal development
• Sign-Up: jennifercohen.com

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Transcript

[A]

Hi, guys, it's Tony Robbins. You're listening to Habits and Hustle. Crush it. Hello, everybody. Welcome to Habits and Hustle solo edition. And because I haven't mentioned it in many, many a days or episodes, guys, if you can, please leave comments and. And what else? And subscribe on YouTube.

[B]

If you are watching, start the solo that way.

[A]

Wait, hold on. Yes, I am. We are joined. Hold on a second. We are joined by my most. What do you call yourself?

[B]

Foil.

[A]

Foil. Exactly. My. My dear friend and sister. Well, kind of like a sister, but not. Not really.

[B]

What are you talking about? We're literally blood related.

[A]

Yeah, we're not blood related, but almost Shani, who's here to kind of join in on the. The fun on the solos again. And we are so. Well, by the way, so nice to have you back.

[B]

Thank you. It's so nice to be back.

[A]

It's so nice to have you back. We missed you over here.

[B]

I love what you've done with the place.

[A]

Do you. I mean, do you really. We were at my kitchen table. Were here. Do you know that?

[B]

I know.

[A]

Do you miss the kitchen table?

[B]

I think the light is nice in there, but this is very nice. And you look so good.

[A]

Oh, no, stop it. I think you just want to have your job back.

[B]

And look at her arms.

[A]

Oh, my God, you're so nice. That's very kind of you. I work out, as you guys all know. But more than that, more than just working out. You know what it is really more than anything, It's. Well, besides working out, it's about what you eat. 99.9% is what you eat. I talk about this all the time. I feel like when you. You can do. You can literally work out like a fiend 24 hours a day. But if you're not, like, watching what you put in your mouth, guess what happens?

[B]

You gain weight.

[A]

You gain weight.

[B]

Like, but I find that if you work out a lot, you have less time to eat.

[A]

No, when you work out, too, there's a. See, I find there to be a very delicate balance between how much you work out and how intense you work out versus not workout. Because the more you work out, the hungrier you get. And the hungrier you get, the more calories you eat. So. And the more intense you work out, the hungrier you get. So you can't really work out. You can't. People. You can't work out so much to the point where you are just starving 23 other 23 hours a day.

[B]

No, obviously not. But as in to Say, like, for me, there's just less time in the day for me to be snacking if I'm, you know, going to a Pilates

[A]

class for that one hour maybe. But then you'll, you'll make up on the snacks on the way home. That's what I find. Or you'll, you'll eat three more snacks because you're ravenous. Like, I get ravenous when I work out too much. So I've had to, like, pull back because this is what comes. Like, this is like the kind of the quandary I get into, which is for my mental health. I need to work out intensely. Like, I need to like, run and do hardcore, like, hit training or cardio. That's really what kind of helps me kind of get my mind right and my mood right. But then on the flip side, I'm then starving and then I end up eating weight more than I normally would, and therefore it becomes this whole, like, vicious cycle, right? Because I can't, like, I want more sugar, I want more. So I have to, like, I have to, like, I have to kind of discipline myself not to work out as intensely on that level.

[B]

You know, I'm like a steady state snacker.

[A]

Oh, steady state snacker. Yes. What does that even mean?

[B]

So I just snack steadily throughout the day, but then if I am busy doing other things, I literally won't snack.

[A]

Well, you got to keep yourself busy then, all the time.

[B]

That's what I do.

[A]

See, I mean, it is good. Being busy does help cut the calories.

[B]

No, it really. Because genuinely, if you don't, I mean, it's good to allocate time to eat and like, get your meals in and stuff. But if you just don't have that much time to sit around, like, snack when I have endless hours to be on the couch, if I'm on vacation, I'm chilling, I'm relaxing. I will inherently just eat so much more.

[A]

See, I'm obsessed over food anyway. Like, I compulsively think about it on the regular. People don't think I do, but I do. That's why I have everything that I. I've kind of created my day around. Like, there's like a. There's like, there's like walls and boundaries. So my. That's why when you have like, what. When you have set times to eat, like, I. That's why I eat my lunch, I eat my dinner, I eat my breakfast all around the same time, each meal. And I exercise at a certain time because it helps, it helps monitor myself. It Helps kind of keep me on point, you know, that's. I think it's really important. That's when I don't have that, I go like, I go crazy. I go hog wild, basically.

[B]

I think it also helps your digestion more too. Like when I, I notice when I eat regularly or at the same times consistently, it's better, but I just rarely do that.

[A]

I know. Well, that's, I think, but that's the problem. I think when people are not on a regular SC schedule or they don't have like a particular regimen in anything in life, in their fitness, their work, wherever, that's when things can get off the rails. Right. Like, I think it's really important to have structure to get to kind of get to your goals, not just like fitness. You need, like, you need to have. You need to have a structure to kind of hit your. Your goals in general. So for me, and also. And know what your triggers are and know where you're going to fall. Like, I know if I don't get my mind right that I'm not going to be as focused and I'm not going to work as hard, I won't be as efficient with other stuff during the day. And if I don't work out first thing, the chances of me eating badly during the day are way higher because I'm just like, I just, I just, I didn't set my. Myself up for success.

[B]

You do feel more encouraged to eat better after a workout.

[A]

You're way more encouraged.

[B]

I mean, you don't want to waste the workout. I realize I feed my dog more regularly than I feed myself. I. For him, it's just at the set time.

[A]

Okay, but this is a perfect example. Before we started here, you said to me, you gained. How much weight did you say you gained?

[B]

Too much. You guys.

[A]

OK, how much? 25 pounds, you said?

[B]

I don't know, 20.

[A]

Okay. Why do you think you gained that?

[B]

But I've already lost like eight of it.

[A]

Because you're doing what? Working out?

[B]

Yeah, because I'm just doing what I know I need to be doing. I fell in love and then I just gained weight. But you know what always happens is the last time I was here when we were doing solos, like during that era, I was. I was also in the process of losing weight and I lost all that weight and I was looking so good and then I fell in love and then I just. I can't help it. And then I moved to Vegas.

[A]

Okay, so that's a really good point. Why? Well, this is what happens? I think when people start, you know, when they get into a new relationship, a lot of times they gain weight.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Why?

[B]

Why?

[A]

I think because you are happy, and then maybe you are, like, social. Like, you socialize around food. Like, you go for nice dinners, you eat lunch, you stay home, you have. You. You maybe you like, you do a lot more. Dine in takeout food, stuff like that, and you eat bigger portions or you're eating the other person's food, you're eating your food, plus you're, like, sharing more foods. You're having more dessert. Like, whenever I'm in a happy relationship, I'm usually 15 to 20 pounds heavier.

[B]

No, it really is true. But I think for me, it's also like, I'm. I'm dating a guy who is, however, much bigger than me, and he needs so many more thousands of calories every day, and he'll chug, like, 10 liters of milk and be fine.

[A]

Like, adult drinks, 10,000 liters of milk.

[B]

He'll drink, like, one to three liters of goat milk a day. I'm not even kidding. And he'll also. He, like, whenever he makes his eggs, he'll add in, like, lots of butter when he's cooking them. Like, I can't eat like that.

[A]

Yeah, you can. I really can't. You can.

[B]

Absolutely cannot. So I do think there is that and there is a sense of indulgence when you're in that sort of early stages of a relationship. You are. You're getting all the desserts and you're this. And guys don't. I don't find that they care the same way. So they're like, yeah, like, just get it.

[A]

But they don't know until you're 20 pounds heavier.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And then they care.

[B]

The.

[A]

Yeah, they don't care until it's too late. It's like, you know, that thing. It's like. It's like that 1% daily until it's like, oh, wow, look what happened. You know, like. But that is true.

[B]

But it works also the opposite way. So it's 1% daily in the positive. So it's just a matter of the slow progress. But I've gained and lost weight so many times. I'm very comfortable and confident in this.

[A]

Well, you know, you know what I like, what's really refreshing in this conversation to me, to be honest, is we're not talking about losing weight on a GLP1. No, like, you're the first scared. I'm telling you're the first person I've sat with probably in two years that's not on a GLP1. Thinking of taking a GLP1 or, you know, was on one and like maybe just microdosing one right now.

[B]

Right. Everyone's doing the micro dosing. I mean, I think I thought about it, but I also, I've like, I'm just weird about things.

[A]

Like, it's funny just taking something for this. Like just.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. I just, you know, I. I think I've just done this so many times that I'm really confident in losing weight in myself. I know what I need to do. I know that I can do it. Like, I don't feel. Feel like it's rocket science at all.

[A]

It's not rocket science.

[B]

And I just think also the glp, I mean, does it do anything to the metabolism or it just kind of helps you not eat as much. Right?

[A]

It just, I think it makes you. Keeps you fuller, keeps you full.

[B]

So I just need to keep myself full. I just have to keep my mind.

[A]

I think it. What it does also is it shuts the food noise. So if you're someone who has a lot of food noise, right? Probably someone like me, I would probably benefit from the food noise because I do have a lot of food noise and I white knuckle it. So I white knuckle the food noise by keeping myself on a schedule. Like I was saying earlier that white knuckle. So I keep myself on a schedule where I don't like, let myself get into a scenario where I'm just gonna like, like eat like a garbage can because I'm starving. Like, I will, I will portion out my food and I will eat multiple times a day and I will have things with big volume because I think volume is really helpful if you're someone who has a lot of food noise and likes to eat. You need to eat big volume foods, like massive salads with your protein and like things that are low calorie. But big volume. I used to be a massive popcorn person.

[B]

Oh, I love popcorn.

[A]

I love popcorn too.

[B]

Little nutritional yeast on top. So delicious.

[A]

So good. So like. And I think if you add volume with a fat, like a really good olive oil, that's why the salads to me are like, like that to me is the best way to keep your weight down. Big, big, big volume salads at least once a day, if not twice.

[B]

Yeah, I. The relationship with weight, I think is so complicated for so many different people. But for me, I really came to a place in this world where it's just kind of like A matter of fact, like, I am where I am and I know where I want to be and like, sometimes that fluctuates and I've gotten to where I want to be so many times and I've also been where I don't want to be so many times. And so I just think it's a matter of taking yourself where you're at and just trudging along. And I have a lot of food noise too. But like, I think that there are, you know, some mental strengths I can summon to be able to quiet those before potentially, you know, putting in something that doesn't respond well with me. I'm so sensitive to stuff. And I'm also, I have so many problems. Like, I have breathing issues and I have like, like my, my, you know, my period always hurts and I've got all these like hormones of like, I don't want to, you know, I just don't want to add to it.

[A]

I will tell you one thing that will. Well, people think that eating less and depriving themselves of eating is the answer to losing weight and to shutting down the food noise. It's like the opposite. I think it's the antithesis to getting to where you want to get in your goal. For me, I think feeding yourself, nurture, like nourishing yourself is way, way more effective because I think when you're in deprivation, that's when you really kind of have that more of a compulsive thought of eating and food and when you're going to eat and how much you're going to eat. But if you actually like feed yourself, you, you really do cut down on that food noise and that psychological like angst that you have a little bit. It's, that's how I, I think like this kind of like limiting your calories to like under 800 for a grown ass woman.

[B]

What?

[A]

Yeah, there are people and men also, like, they're like, yeah, I'm eating 1200 calories a day. I'm like, are you, like, how do you, how do you sustain that? Because then your body also goes into starvation mode and then you get used to eating 1200 calories a day. And then what happens is if you have 1201 calories the next day, your body holds onto wood and like stores it as fat. So if you actually just ate like a, like a regular person. So if you're, you know, and no, seriously, if you ate like a proper amount of food and maybe a little bit more once in a while, it actually behooves you and it gets you way more results on the other side. On the flip side also, you got to feed muscle.

[B]

I've always found that the shift, like, you're talking about and saying, what can I eat versus what can't I eat? You know, how do I nourish my body versus, like, what am I supposed to do? Stay away from. It's the negative versus the positive. It's just so much more encouraging. Like, what can I eat? A lot of things.

[A]

Well, how much does it have? Also, like, I'm obsessed with pizza and french fries, right? I don't want to eat them all the time. Because once if. Because I see it as this taboo food, once I do eat it. Because if I deprive and I've trained myself, once I deprive myself for so long and then I see a french fry, I will literally have nine orders of it. Like a crazy, like, like, like, yeah, like a disordered eating person. Because I'm just like, I'm just. I can't believe I'm having that taste in my mouth and I go crazy. But if now, if I like, no, okay, fine, like, I'm allowed to have french fries, you know, once every two, three weeks, then I'm much better in the portion control. Not a lot better, but at least, like, at least a little bit better.

[B]

My boyfriend told me that pizza was a protein, like a health food when we first started dating. Because he just has weird.

[A]

He dated.

[B]

For him, it can be a health food, right? But, like, it is not for me. He's like. He's like a bodybuilder. No type and anything just turns into muscle. It's like, I'm not like that. I'm not.

[A]

Hold on a second. Your boyfriend is a bodybuilder?

[B]

Bodybuilder, former bodybuilder.

[A]

He's chugging, you know, liters of goat milk. Yeah, he loves goat milk pizza, like, tons of pizza.

[B]

Where is by goat milk? He's not having tons of pizza, but he likes pizza. And he acts like pizza is like a healthy, like, meal.

[A]

Well, maybe it's because maybe he's not eating Domino's pizza.

[B]

No good quality pizza, but still is like a health food.

[A]

I repeat, pizza is not a health food.

[B]

He also told me vanilla, like, really good quality vanilla ice cream is a health food, with which I just refuse to believe. So you can understand why he gained so much weight.

[A]

Yeah, I don't blame you. I'd be a house if I lived with that guy. Honest to God, I'd be. I'd be a House if I live with that guy. So then where were we, where were we going with this at the beginning of the podcast?

[B]

Well, I think the idea was talking about like the, the.

[A]

We don't know. What were you saying?

[B]

You know, it's a good question. We were going to talk about a different topic, but I think what we did end up doing is talking about the topic, which is that the gym and getting healthy and nourishing yourself and your body is actually light years better at improving confidence than therapy ever will.

[A]

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. That's not the, the actual topic we were going to talk about is why I believe. Okay, this is where the topic I was going to say is that why believe fitness is a way bigger builder of confidence than therapy or affirmations. That was the topic.

[B]

That's the whole point. The topic is also what I said.

[A]

But that, but that is the topic because why? I, I feel that fitness is the gateway drug to building self esteem, self confidence, self assurance. There's no better thing that you can do for yourself than working out for those things.

[B]

Amen.

[A]

Right? Amen. I think you can talk all you want all day and you can ruminate about, you know, all the things you want to be and what you're not getting and who you are and what you want to be. And God bless you if you're someone who loves therapy. But I think if you really want to really build on your self esteem and confidence, include and, or rely on getting yourself fit and getting a fitness regimen, a workout regimen that will get you to the finish line. That will get you way more confidence, way more self assurance, self efficacy, because you know what? Confidence is built. I think confidence is built in reps, hard reps, day after day, and consistency than just saying how great you think you are in the mirror. Do you know why?

[B]

Why?

[A]

Because confidence can't just be affirmed. It has to be earned. And the only way to earn it is to prove it to yourself that you can do hard things.

[B]

I love that. Confidence is earned.

[A]

Yeah, confidence is earned, people. You can say to yourself a million times in the mirror, I'm great, I'm, I'm strong, I'm wonderful, I'm wonderful a hundred times. But you're, but your brain knows what you believe is not like you. Basically, you can't lie to yourself. So if you actually don't believe those things, your brain knows that you don't believe your believe it. And so that can actually cause you to be more self conscious, have less of a Self esteem, be more depressed because you can't lie to yourself. Like, if you actually believe it and then you say it, that's a, that's a whole different story. But you can't just like speak your way into saying something that you don't believe is true.

[B]

But I think the idea is that you give yourself a boost. Like you're hyping yourself up to be those things. And then when you, when you take those actions to be those things, which is what you're talking about, it builds like real confidence. But the kind of, if it's not,

[A]

if it's a talking stage, there's no action behind it. Of course, that's. Of course.

[B]

But you need. But some people can't just take action. They have to hype themselves.

[A]

Okay, so you can go, you can go in front of a mirror and say, I'm great, I'm beautiful, I'm strong, I'm this, I'm that. And then you walk on your sofa, do nothing. No, but there's nothing for you.

[B]

But then you walk into a meeting and you crush.

[A]

No, because you haven't proven anything to yourself.

[B]

No, because you're, you're hyping yourself up self. Positive self talk is a good thing.

[A]

Positive self talk. We're not talking about positive self talk. That's true. I'm, I'm, I'm all about like hyping yourself up. Like if you want to, like before a meeting, you know, go before a meeting, like say all these great positive things to yourself and then go into a meeting, that's fine. But before you go into that meeting and before you say all those things, what have you done to prove to yourself that you are strong, that you are tough, that you are beautiful? Whether you are all these things, you have to do a litany of things and habits to show yourself that you are taking care of yourself, that you do matter, that you do have self esteem. Like, what are those things? Of course.

[B]

But I'm just saying some people need to talk to themselves to be able

[A]

to do those things. And what I'm saying is talking is not enough. But talking is not going to get you to the point you're not understanding what I'm saying.

[B]

I'm saying talking sometimes gets people to the starting line. Sometimes people can't even get to the starting point. For you, it's easier to take action because you're an action person. You're queen bold. Are you kidding me? But for some people, they can't even get to the room or the conversation or to the gym. They have to tell themselves like, no, you're okay, you're strong. You're not horrible. You're not that weak. Like, you're fine. You can do this. You can get to the gym. And then they get to the gym, Then they take that action, and then they build that real confidence.

[A]

But I understand what you're saying. But that's what you're saying is different than what I'm saying. What I'm saying is affirmations alone, of course, don't get you to where you want to go. Therapy alone is not going to get you there. And I'm also saying that I believe if you just focus on working out, taking care of your body physically, your brain will.

[B]

I see what you're saying.

[A]

Your brain will catch up, right?

[B]

As in working out. Your brain will actually do those things. Your brain versus affirmations alone or therapy alone. Right, I see. Yeah. And I actually really agree with that.

[A]

That's what I'm saying wholehearted. I'm not saying, you know, positive self talk is lousy or doesn't work. I think it works in addition to. It's like also this manifestation thing. You can't just sit there and say, I want to have a million dollars and I want to find my dream man and I want to have a red Corvette or whatever that thing is. What I'm really about, what the steps are to get you to that point. And I. I think that we are talking more. I see it a little bit more about like the action behind the manifestation vision board, but at the same time, again, at the end of the day, it is about the action and is about the steps. So, you know, without that, this is all moot, you know, And I also believe that, like I said, the fitness part is, I believe will transform who you believe you are and what you're capable of on every level of your life. More than anything else you can possibly do for yourself by a landslide. It will shape shift or shift your belief in yourself, your self, sense of self worth, what you think you're capable of, your relationships, personally, who you go after as a mate, how you parent, all of it. If you actually see yourself transforming in that way, like physically, it will change how you. You are in the world, mentally, emotionally, behaviorally, and all the things.

[B]

And her credentials are her arms. Oh, she knows what she's talking about.

[A]

No, that means I. That just means that I can do a bicep curl really well and.

[B]

No, no, but anyways, I. I hear you and I agree. I think it's really powerful. So go work out everyone.

[A]

Or at least take. Start taking fitness seriously to some extent. I think that you, if you, if you haven't done it yet, if you haven't taken fitness seriously to some extent yet, you are remiss in getting the benefits. I think if you just stay with it long enough, you will be astounded at how you see yourself six months from the day you started. But you have to be consistent. Nothing works on doing something once in a while or occasionally you have to be doing something over and over and over again, day in, day out. Even though it's, it may not be the most fun, it might be super boring, but boring gets you to the finish line. Boring is what works. Boring is, is actually how you get to be where you want to be. I think we try to, like, find all these, like, sexy things and sexy ways to accomplish whatever that is we want to accomplish. And at the end of the day, it's doing the same boring shit every single day. Even when you don't want to. You do it anyway. You do it anyway. Those are the three words I think are the most fundamental, foundational words that people should live by. Do it anyway. And that will help you with everything in your life.

[B]

Amen.

[A]

Bye.

[B]

Join her book club.

[A]

Oh, yeah, join my book club. You guys. I started a book club and we're on our first book now. It's called the Courage to Be Disliked. And every month we're going to pick a book and we are going to, as a community, as a group, we're going to go through the book. Every book that we choose is going to be a book that will help you improve in one way or another. It will be either help you physically, mentally, emotionally, whatever, cognitively. And it's a way that we, it's, it's a, it's a great habit to get in is to read more. I think that we are as a whole looking for more connection and this is how I do it. So please go and join. Sign up. Go to My website, Jennifer Cohen.com, sign up and we will see you soon.

[B]

Yay, Sam.