Hacking Your ADHD – "Ditching the Planner: Consistently Inconsistent with Dani Donovan"

Host: William Curb
Guest: Dani Donovan
Date: March 2, 2026

Episode Overview

In this episode, William Curb sits down with neurodivergent artist, designer, and creator of the “Anti-Planner,” Dani Donovan. Together, they dig deep into why traditional planners rarely work long-term for ADHD-ers, the emotional hurdles tied to productivity, overcoming perfectionism, anti-shame tactics, and how to shift to a toolbox mindset, building flexible systems to work with ADHD brains rather than against them. Dani shares personal insights, hacks, and strategies for getting things done when motivation (and consistency) wavers, making this a practical and empathetic guide for “consistently inconsistent” listeners.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Problem with Traditional Planners

[03:04–07:38]

• Dani shares the genesis of the Anti-Planner:
  • She spent years buying expensive planners, hoping "this is the year I'll get my shit together," only to abandon them after a few months and feel shame about it.
  • Planners “go bad” (expire), are often rigid, and don't account for missed days, which triggers perfectionism and avoidance.

“I will buy a 60, $70 planner and this is the year that I change my life...and then it's not different ... I miss a page or I miss a couple days ... and now there are blank pages and I just used to freeze and really get so perfectionistic about it that it was just really hard to get back on the wagon.” – Dani [03:20]

• Planners are just one tool—not a universal solution for all productivity roadblocks.

• Toolbox Mindset:

  • ADHD success means switching strategies as needed rather than feeling guilty for inconsistency.

“The ADHD key is that you don't beat yourself up for not sticking with things, you instead plan on not sticking with things.” – Dani [06:10]

2. The Need for a Toolbox Approach

[07:43–09:36]

• William and Dani both discuss the recurring allure and disappointment of new planners and systems.
• Dani reflects on her attempts at bullet journaling, ultimately abandoning it due to perfectionism and unsustainable expectations.

“Perfectionism is always what gets me … So there are different sections of the book, like of the Anti Planner, that help deal with those different resistances, and one of them is perfectionism. And that is the section that I like, live and breathe.” – Dani [08:23]

• Insight: Systems should serve you, not the other way around; familiarity leads to boredom or disuse.

3. Identifying Specific Resistance Types

[09:45–16:17]

• Dani reveals the Anti-Planner is organized by emotional resistance types (e.g., stuck, overwhelmed, unmotivated, disorganized, discouraged), with tailored strategies in each.
• She’s developed a Notion-based quiz to help users quickly find their top resistance types and tools.

“I made a quiz ... It's an executive dysfunction quiz ... it will automatically show you in order, here are the 16 subsections ranked by what you scored in all of them.” – Dani [09:45]

• Self-experimentation: Treat finding the right strategy like a science experiment—a process of elimination, not self-blame.

“When I play Wordle ... if you get letters that are wrong, you don’t go, ‘oh my God, I’m such a failure.’ ... it’s the same thing with strategies; every time I find out something doesn't work for me ... I can use that data.” – Dani [15:06]

4. Troubleshooting, Novelty, and Remixes

[14:02–16:32]

• Recognizing why a tool stopped working is key—was it boredom, forgetting, complexity?
• Remixing existing successful tools can restore novelty and effectiveness.
• Introspection is a skill; the ability to diagnose what went wrong takes practice.
• Keep the bar low for wins: Make “winning” as easy as possible to build self-trust and avoid shame cycles.

5. Anti-Shame Tactics & Motivation

[21:11–28:41]

• Addressing shame: Many ADHD-ers use negative self-talk and “mean” motivation as a tool.

“We’ve learned to motivate ourselves by being mean to ourselves because other people being mean to us motivated us ... you think you’re frustrated with me, I’m frustrated with myself 24/7.” – Dani [21:28]

• Dani describes ADHD as feeling “like I’ve got an eight-year-old driving this car ... watching the eight-year-old drive my car into a ditch almost and being able to watch it happen in slow motion and feel powerless.”
• Reframe: Instead of “I am the problem,” focus on “this is the problem I need to solve.”
• Building self-trust is essential:

“...we don’t think of ourselves as reliable ... So why should you have to build that self trust back? Part of that is by not asking too much of yourself and not ... when you lower the bar, like, significantly lower the bar for what you are expecting yourself to do, you are going to reach that thing ... and ... feel good versus if ... up here.” – Dani [28:41]

6. Celebrating Small Wins & Practical Strategies

[25:53–29:45]

• Importance of micro-accomplishments and celebrating small wins (e.g., hanging up a poster, replying to emails).
• Sticky Note Rule: Only remove it from your phone when the task is done—use sparingly, or the system loses power.
• Bribes/Rewards: Dani uses “magic packs” (trading cards) as rewards—works as long as she keeps the contract with herself.
• Inbox Sprint: Gamifying mundane tasks by timing herself helps avoid overthinking emails and perfection paralysis.

"There's an activity called Inbox Sprint ... it's about answering emails as fast as you can ... you check off each little email that you answer ... so you get the satisfaction of crossing something off." – Dani [35:47]

7. Task Adjacency, Momentum, and Self-Compassion

[39:45–44:21]

• Using adjacent tasks to trick yourself into beginning (“stand in front of the sink and turn on the water”).
• Lowering the bar for “winning.” Example: Just putting on workout clothes and driving to the gym counts as a win.
• Self-forgiveness and reframing failures as experiments crucial (anything done, no matter how small or imperfect, is progress).

“Anything worth doing is worth doing poorly. You don’t need to do it amazing.” – William [42:01]

• Worst Draft Principle: Labeling your first attempts explicitly as “worst draft” can reduce intimidation and perfectionism.

8. Perfectionism, High Stakes, and External Validation

[44:21–50:31]

• Perfectionism in ADHD often stems from fear of criticism or judgment, both from self and others; external validation becomes a crutch.

“The perfectionism thing is fear. It is like, fear and a little tuxedo and fear of failure. But fear of judgment. Fear of judgment for myself or judgment from other people. And not doing my best feels like a crime.” – Dani [45:30]

• Dani shares how perfectionism slowed her book’s release and the pressure of “peaking” with the Anti-Planner.
• Learning to accept “done is better than perfect” and that picking battles (where to allow perfectionism) is part of growing self-awareness.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On the anti-planner philosophy:

  "If you're trying to solve every problem with a planner, it's like you're trying to solve every problem with a hammer and it's not going to work. And we blame ourselves. And I'm like, I'm sick of everybody blaming themselves ... We're not the problem. There just weren't things being developed that solved for the problem we were experiencing." – Dani [06:55]

• On system fatigue:

  "If one thing is good, eight things is eight times good. What could go wrong?" – Dani [31:14]

• On novelty and self-compassion:

  "The first step isn’t the first step of whatever it is you’re doing. The first step is the baby step you got, which is opening this book on how to get stuff done. … Your journey has already begun." – Dani [16:32]

• On celebrating small wins:

  "Just do one of those things, that is such a win. Because the alternative was not doing anything and anything is better than nothing." – Dani [41:06]

• On anti-shame techniques:

  "If I could figure out the reason, then I could solve for it. And the reason isn't just me ... I think that's the self-blame part—'I am the problem'—it's like, nope, this is the problem. This right here is the problem. You are not the problem." – Dani [22:38]

• On how ADHD makes consistency impossible:

  "Consistently inconsistent. ... That's just my people." – Dani [07:40]

Timestamps for Important Segments

• [03:04] – Dani explains why traditional planners fail ADHD users
• [06:10] – Planning for inconsistency instead of blaming yourself
• [09:45] – Quiz for diagnosing your executive dysfunction & toolbox approach
• [14:26] – Remixing tools and restoring novelty
• [16:32] – Introspection and troubleshooting skills for system failures
• [21:11] – Using anti-shame tactics & moving away from "mean" motivation
• [25:53] – Importance of micro-accomplishments; creating rules that work
• [35:47] – Inbox Sprint: time-based gamified email management
• [39:45] – Task adjacency and lowering the bar for initiation ("winning")
• [44:21] – The power and pitfalls of perfectionism; managing high stakes
• [50:52] – Dani’s closing thoughts on self-compassion and objectivity

Final Takeaways

• Dani’s parting message:

  “You are not lazy. ... Be nice to yourself. And that's easier said than done, but it goes a long way.” – Dani [50:52]

• William’s Top Tips Recap:

  1. Build a flexible toolbox, not a rigid system.
  2. Diagnose your specific emotional resistance before choosing a tool or strategy.
  3. Replace self-blame with curiosity—treat “failures” as data, not character flaws.

If you’re tired of blaming yourself for not sticking to planners and want practical, empathetic ways to work with your ADHD brain, this episode—and the Anti-Planner—are for you.

Links & Resources:

• The Anti-Planner: antiplanner.com
• Hacking Your ADHD: hackingyouradhd.com