Abbi Jacobson asks about personal style

Summary

Handsome Podcast

Episode: Abbi Jacobson Asks About Personal Style
Date: August 19, 2025
Hosts: Tig Notaro, Fortune Feimster, Mae Martin
Guest Questioner: Abbi Jacobson
Podcast Network: Headgum

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Main Theme

This episode revolves around personal style: what it means, if and how each host has found theirs, how it evolves, and how confidence intersects with how we dress. Brought to the fore by a question from comedian/creator Abbi Jacobson, the conversation is as much about self-perception as it is about clothing, spiraling out into stories about vacations, awkward meals, animal encounters, and the often hilarious realities of queer fashion.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Life & Adventures Before the Style Question (02:00–39:03)

Mae’s Meditative Woodland Retreat

• Mae is on a solo trip at Lake Arrowhead, packing "multiple suitcases, paints, instruments, cameras... fake mustache, facial products, weights" (03:00–03:23).
  • They reflect on craving this experience:

    “It's been so long since I cooked three meals a day for myself and did the dishes after and read a book and went to bed. I'm like, oh, my God, I get why people do this.” (03:57)

• “I thought everyone… shaved their calves but not their thighs” Mae reveals, discussing unexpected and unique personal grooming habits amongst the group. (05:47–06:26)
• Mae admits to making a “bleak” hot dog meal—“one plain hot dog and one chip and two pickles”—to the amusement of all (07:14–07:22).

Fortune’s Trip to Iceland

• Fortune shares details of her “healing” trip to Iceland with best friend Andrea (11:07–17:19):
  • Praises the sturdy women, food, lesbian-owned restaurants.
  • Discovers the travel company “Pink Iceland”: “They also put on weddings for people … from different countries where it’s not okay to… be gay… The company is two lesbians and a gay man who run it. They have the biggest hearts.” (15:32)
  • Saw the Northern Lights:

    “To the naked eye it's kind of hard to see them... When you take a picture, it's so obvious it's the northern lights. … We've had friends visit for years and never seen them.” (16:34–17:03)

• Hot tub culture and geothermal spas; both Fortune and Tig express their love for spending hours in hot tubs. "I could sit alone in a hot tub for four hours and just stare off and think and do nothing." – Tig (23:32)

Tig’s Family Time in New York and a Tribute

• Tig is traveling with family in New York, attending a Yankees game where her twin sons have the “best day of their lives,” getting field access and custom vegan meals (24:30–25:19).
• Reflects emotionally on Andrea Gibson’s memorial in Denver, the Mercury Cafe’s role in the creative community, and how poets can become touchstones of culture:
  • “It's just so beautiful... poets from every corner of everywhere came to town... just different poets doing Andrea's truly greatest hits.” (27:32–30:50)
  • Moving metaphor from Andrea’s caregiver Buddy:

    “…that was ultimately what Andrea did in life, was cheer on exhausted runners in this world.” (37:43)

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2. [Main Segment] Abbi Jacobson Asks: Have You Found Your Personal Style? (39:03–63:30)

Abbi Jacobson’s Question (39:37)

“Do you guys feel like you've found like a personal style? … Sometimes I see someone, I’m like, God, they just really tapped into their look and their vibe and they clearly feel really good and confident in what they're wearing... Do you guys feel like you have that? And if so… what is it? When did you find it?”

Hosts’ Reflections on Style

• Tig Notaro:

  • Deadpans, “as far as personal style. Lesbian.” (41:02)
  • Jokes about being “a generic lesbian [who can’t] be found if [she] ever goes missing” (41:18).
  • Actual preferences: Earth tones, simple masculine staples, “good quality cottons.” (41:46–42:06)

• Mae Martin:

  • Longstanding signature haircut, sometimes blonde, sometimes using 90s Sun-In: “I’m spraying bleach onto my head.” (47:36–47:59)
  • Clothes: has “struggled” with finding style, finally “just settling into nice jeans, nice simple things: white tee, black jeans, black tee, blue jeans.” (46:56–47:32)
  • Admits to panic-cooking a sad hot dog meal as a “date-gone-wrong,” describing how it was served as a main and a side: “I was trying to justify the presentation. I was like, how cool is it that a hot dog can be the main. And also a side?” (45:06)

• Fortune Feimster:

  • “My style is just being comfortable. Where Tig is being a lesbian, I’m being comfortable.” (54:17)
  • Signature curly hair for 23 years after discovering layers: “I learned about layers.” (54:39–54:54)
  • Loves T-shirts with phrases, especially from fans—"If it’s a nice, cozy, soft cotton tee, that’s... what I will wear." (51:54–52:07)
  • On formal occasions, enjoys “experimenting with suits and colors and patterns”—especially after getting into suiting for TV gigs (52:44–53:28).
  • About shopping: not a big spender, prefers wearing merch that’s comfy, and only rejects “scratchy” shirts (52:06).

Debates, Doubts & Social Pressures

• Mae: “I held on to skinny jeans for a long time after everyone else had moved on … I just started getting a lot of flack … but if I just owned it, maybe people [would] be like, where’d you get them?” (46:56–50:08)
• Tig: “No, I still wear skinny jeans. What do I do about this?” (49:06)
• Fortune: “I think you can, Tig… I really don't care if people like what I'm wearing or not.” (49:46–50:17)
• On hair and aging: Tig wonders if she should dye her increasingly gray hair, but is encouraged not to:

  “No, don’t dye it. You’re rocking it.” – Mae (56:56)

• On makeovers & style evolution:

  “I wonder if any of us have a big style makeover in our future, or have we landed…?” – Mae (55:43)
  “I’m done.” – Tig (55:57)

Funniest/Most Notable Quotes & Moments

• “If I ever go missing, I'm scared I'll never be found again because I'm like five five, brown hair, brown eye... just look like a generic lesbian.” – Tig (41:11)
• “I was justifying: how cool is it that a hot dog can be the main. And also a side? Like, you got an extra wiener on the side.” – Mae (45:06)
• “My style is just being comfortable.” – Fortune (54:17)
• “We're so handsome. For sure. Influencers. Wearing T shirts on our picture for our podcast.” – Fortune (56:22–56:34)
• [On past fashion regrets] “There was a period of time where my T shirts were a little too short.” – Fortune (60:20)
• “Our podcast is all about handsome being whatever it is to you.” – Fortune (62:22)

Abbi Jacobson’s Own Answer (58:38–59:47)

• On style, confidence, and change:

  “Sometimes I feel like I got it. And sometimes… What was I wearing there? … The moments where I felt most confident were like when I stick to a classic sort of basic... when I’ve found a uniform for myself... I think this is a never-ending question and something that is… always evolving as we change.” (58:38)

• Admits she doesn’t have a fixed answer, but sees style as always in flux—a point all hosts commiserate with.

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Notable Quotes (with Timestamps)

• “It's been so long since I cooked three meals a day...” – Mae (03:57)
• “As far as personal style. Lesbian.” – Tig (41:02)
• “My style is just being comfortable.” – Fortune (54:17)
• “That was ultimately what Andrea did in life was cheer on exhausted runners in this world.” – Tig (37:43)
• “Sometimes I feel like I got it. And sometimes I’m like, what was I wearing there? … I think this is a never-ending question and something that is always evolving.” – Abbi (58:38)
• “We're so handsome. For sure. Influencers. Wearing T-shirts on our picture for our podcast.” – Fortune (56:22)
• “If I ever go missing, I’m scared I’ll never be found again… I look like the most generic lesbian wandering around.” – Tig (41:18)
• “How cool is it that a hot dog can be the main and also a side?” – Mae (45:06)
• “Handsome is in the eye of the beholder as well. You're handsome to people for different reasons and you're handsome to yourself for different reasons. And your style can be whatever it is you want as long as you feel good.” – Fortune (62:28)

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Important Segments (with Timestamps)

• Mae’s Lake Arrowhead Life & Hot Dog Saga – 02:00–08:46
• Fortune’s Iceland Adventure & ‘Pink Iceland’ – 11:06–17:17
• Tig’s Baseball Family Outing & Andrea Gibson Tribute – 24:30–32:33
• Abbi Jacobson’s Style Question – 39:37
• Personal Style Deep-Dive & Anecdotes – 41:02–59:47
• Fan Art & Vibrator Hairdos – 48:01–48:55
• Wardrobe Regrets & Red Carpet Mishaps – 59:54–62:17
• Philosophy of Handsome – 62:22–62:50

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Tone & Vibe

Warm, goofy, candid, and affirmingly queer—the Handsome hosts are at their comedic best, unafraid to poke fun at themselves, swap honest insecurities, and celebrate both their own and each other’s strengths and foibles. There's a mix of playful storytelling (Mae’s hot dog date disaster), supportive teasing, and sincere wisdom about comfort, self-acceptance, aging, and sartorial trends.

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Summary for New Listeners

This episode is a perfect window into the Handsome crew’s blend of humor, banter, and real discussion. While the focus is technically on “personal style,” the real heart is in stories about fumbling through life—awkward meals, transformative trips, sweet memories, growing older, and finding comfort in one’s own skin (and jeans). Listeners come away knowing nobody’s got it all figured out—and that, truly, is pretty handsome.

Transcript

[May Martin]

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[May Martin]

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[Fortune Feemster]

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[Tig Notaro]

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[Fortune Feemster]

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[May Martin]

Chatting with friends on the Handsome Pod Chatting with friends on the handsome Handsome Pod Cheers.

[Fortune Feemster]

Cheers.

[May Martin]

Welcome to the Handsome Pod. I'm one of your hosts, May Martin. Join. It's so lovely to see you guys as always, but by joined by.

[Fortune Feemster]

I'm Fortune Feemster.

[Tig Notaro]

And I am Tig Notaro. Hi friends.

[Fortune Feemster]

Hi friends. Hi May, wherever you are is gorgeous.

[May Martin]

Thank you.

[Tig Notaro]

Looks like you're in a like a greenhouse.

[May Martin]

I'm in Lake Arrowhead. It's happening. My weird solo meditative excursion where you.

[Tig Notaro]

Were inviting a bunch of people up.

[May Martin]

Well, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Fortune Feemster]

What happened with that?

[May Martin]

Well, okay, I've been up here five days and like three of those days I've been by myself. Like, like sleeping by in the quiet house in the woods. So isolated. I don't. I have no car. I have no Uber Eats. I have no Uber Blacks. I have no Uber.

[Tig Notaro]

My goodness, how'd you get.

[Fortune Feemster]

How'd you get there?

[May Martin]

Uber.

[Fortune Feemster]

You Uber Black? Yeah. Lake Arrowhead?

[May Martin]

Yes. With so much stuff in the Uber, I packed up so much stuff, and then I'm on the road, and I was thinking, well, okay, then what the hell is all that other stuff in my house? Because I have everything I need. I mean, I've got multiple suitcases, paints, instruments, cameras.

[Fortune Feemster]

Oh, my.

[May Martin]

Facial products, weights. Like, I brought my fake mustache.

[Fortune Feemster]

You brought weights.

[May Martin]

I brought weights.

[Fortune Feemster]

Uber driver was probably. The fuck is happening?

[May Martin]

I know. I know.

[Fortune Feemster]

Wow. I really need you to pass your driving test. You have to start being able to rent a car.

[Tig Notaro]

I need you to not. Because I enjoy hearing about this ridiculousness. Now, tell us, how's it. How it's going? Is it feeling. Feeling good? Is it what you're hoping? Are you. Are you really challenging yourself with this time?

[May Martin]

Yes. I need to challenge myself more, maybe. But I'm like. I just realized when I got up here, I. I kind of. I've been craving this for years. Like, maybe 10 years. I feel like I've been talking about wanting to do this and bringing on books and stuff, and I am just realizing, like, I forgot kind of how to. Or maybe I never knew how to be a human being. Like, it's been so long since I cooked three meals a day for myself and did the dishes after and read a book and went to bed. I'm like, oh, my God, I get why people do this.

[Tig Notaro]

And so what do you do? You just order food in and then throw that away?

[May Martin]

And then the waste. And I'm so. I just am so busy, and I don't love my kitchen, and I. I don't. I don't know. So I've been. I made a pasta up here. I did make one meal, actually. Maybe we can post a picture of it. Should I. Should I find the picture and show you guys? This is when I thought I'd need to challenge myself more.

[Fortune Feemster]

Okay, let's see it.

[May Martin]

Maybe you guys can kind of psychoanalyze what this says about me. We could maybe post this picture, but this was a meal that I had high hopes for. I thought, I'm up in the woods. What are you eating? The worst.

[Tig Notaro]

You're not naked in this photo, are you?

[May Martin]

No.

[Fortune Feemster]

Would you have stopped Mei from showing this picture?

[Tig Notaro]

If so, I just wanted to let our YouTube viewers know that you might be seeing Mae in the nude. Whether that's good or bad news, I just want you to know I didn't know if Mae was trying to trick us. Into seeing them naked.

[May Martin]

You know, I've been trying to do that.

[Fortune Feemster]

I think people would very much enjoy it.

[Tig Notaro]

Is that what you're wanting, Fortune? You want to see me naked?

[Fortune Feemster]

Everybody wants it. Come on.

[May Martin]

Actually, on that topic, someone recently said to me, you know, it's. It's weird how you shave your calves but not your thighs. And I thought, everybody does that, don't they? And then I realized that's just me. And it's like I'm wearing fur shorts. I have these smooth, hairless, womanly thighs. And then I have these manly, like, hairy or sorry, womanly calves.

[Tig Notaro]

Reverse, reverse hairy thighs.

[May Martin]

And I just thought, everyone, I thought you're not supposed to shave your thighs because it grows back darker. But anyways, the point is, my thighs are not shaving calves anymore. They're not.

[Fortune Feemster]

Uh, so I don't have to shave them.

[Tig Notaro]

You don't have any hair on your thighs?

[Fortune Feemster]

No, I just shave my legs.

[Tig Notaro]

I see. I have little prickly hairs coming out of my knees and stuff like that. So I shave all that Fortune.

[May Martin]

You're just shaving your calves?

[Fortune Feemster]

I'm just shaving my calves. But if my thighs were hairy, I probably would shave them.

[May Martin]

Okay, well, I think my solution, I'm up in the woods. I'm like, just not going to shave any of my legs.

[Fortune Feemster]

You know, I like keeping my gam smooth because I got to show off those muscles.

[May Martin]

Yes, you do. Okay. This is the meal that I cooked. And I thought, I'm gonna make hot dogs, I'm gonna grill them. I'm gonna do. This was.

[Tig Notaro]

What a nice alone time meal.

[Fortune Feemster]

What a fancy meal.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, goodness, that is.

[May Martin]

Is there.

[Fortune Feemster]

Have you seen a slaughter happening here? It's a hot dog on a bun. One plain hot dog and one chip and two pickles.

[May Martin]

Two Doritos and two pickles. And I thought, I don't know, in my mind it was going to be this, I don't know, summery dis meal.

[Fortune Feemster]

So I can't tell if you're having a good time or if you're too lonely.

[May Martin]

I'm having a good time. I'm having a really good time.

[Tig Notaro]

No, you're not.

[Fortune Feemster]

But you're also. You're also.

[Tig Notaro]

You're counting the days to get out of there.

[Fortune Feemster]

Look, I'm to load your weights and.

[Tig Notaro]

Your hot dogs back in the Uber. You're miserable. Let's talk honestly.

[Fortune Feemster]

This is great. I'm reading books and I'm chilling and I made a hot dog somebody bought me with me. Have you invited any friends to Come up.

[May Martin]

I currently have two friends here, and then I have two more friends coming and. Yeah, but for the most part, I'm going to be by myself with the beautiful creatures of the forest. I've seen four raccoons. I've seen blue jays are. I think they're blue jays. They're blue and about right. Yeah.

[Fortune Feemster]

Sounds like a blue jay, a woodpecker.

[May Martin]

I saw a vulture, a lot of squirrels, and then one squirrel that is his own breed or something. He's like the size of a dog, and he is so muscular and big. And I sound like I have a crush on him, but I don't.

[Tig Notaro]

Now, can I recommend something if you do want people to visit you?

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Send them a picture of your hot dogs.

[Fortune Feemster]

You guys, I'm making some good meals up here. Cooking up a storm. Is it any better with your friends there?

[May Martin]

Yeah, listen, I'm having a good time.

[Fortune Feemster]

They totally.

[May Martin]

They cooked me a steak last night. That was good.

[Fortune Feemster]

Is there a hot tub?

[May Martin]

Yeah, there's a hot tub and.

[Fortune Feemster]

All right, now we're talking.

[May Martin]

There's no real. Like, this whole lake is private docks. And so one night I snuck onto a stranger's dock and I jumped in at the sunset in a horse suit. I was in a horse suit. It was heavy in the water.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, I bet.

[May Martin]

Yeah. But it's been. It's been good. I mean, you know, we'll check in and see how my mental health's holding up. I've definitely been getting a little weird.

[Tig Notaro]

We'll check in five minutes after we end this. Zoom.

[May Martin]

Yeah. For the real.

[Fortune Feemster]

How long are you there?

[May Martin]

I booked it for three weeks.

[Fortune Feemster]

Whoa. That's a long time. Okay, but wait.

[Tig Notaro]

Fortune. Did you notice what just happened? You said, how long are you there? And May said, I booked it for three weeks. That is somebody who is not committing to staying for three weeks.

[Fortune Feemster]

That is May saying, this is how much time it's for, but probably not how many. How much time I'll be there for.

[May Martin]

May, be honest, I'm thinking about making some little trips to LA just to check in.

[Fortune Feemster]

There's a lot of Uber Black.

[Tig Notaro]

Yes.

[May Martin]

Seriously?

[Fortune Feemster]

Oh, my God.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feemster]

You have to, like. You have to really like the woods in nature and not having a lot to do to go up there.

[Tig Notaro]

But also, let's be honest, May is indoors. It's not like May is living off the land.

[May Martin]

Excuse me. I'm out there. I'm sitting at night. I'm feeling the stars. Hearing the stars is. I'm. I'm. You know what? I was thinking, though, all to all these animals, this is like a bustling metropolis where they're like, morning, morning. And then in, in the city they must feel like it's a ghostland where they like hear a noise and they're like, maybe it's an owl. And then it's just a night bus or something. So I'm in there. I'm in the big city for them.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Night buses.

[Fortune Feemster]

I have to say, I just took a trip that was, I want to hear, very relaxing. I went to Iceland.

[Tig Notaro]

Yes.

[Fortune Feemster]

And my best friend Andrea, shout out of 20 years. She went with me. And we had. We had not taken a friend trip in many, many years. And it just was so fun. And I've never been to Iceland before. It was amazing.

[Tig Notaro]

I'm so jealous.

[Fortune Feemster]

Oh my God, the food. So fresh, so good. We went to this lesbian owned restaurant. Yes. Helga is the chef and of course she's incredible. I had all kinds of things I never thought I would eat. I mean, ever. All Icelandic women are sturdy. Just picture that. I fit in very well.

[Tig Notaro]

You're a sturdy little lady.

[Fortune Feemster]

I'm a sturdy little lady. It was the one country I did not get called sir in.

[Tig Notaro]

I've tried to push you over before and it's nearly impossible. I'm so sturdy.

[Fortune Feemster]

I'm a sturdy gal. So this, this restaurant, and I can't say an Icelandic, but it's. It just stands for food and drink. No, Helge just gets right to the point.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

No frills, just sturdy names.

[Fortune Feemster]

But she's like, she's like, experimented with flavors like so much that she has just figured out how to put things together that you never think of. And it's incredible.

[May Martin]

Like hot dogs and pickles, like things.

[Fortune Feemster]

And my friend is a vegetarian and they, they did stuff for her that she loved and so that was amazing. And we went to a bunch of lagoons.

[May Martin]

Yes.

[Fortune Feemster]

Where you just sit in water. Andrea. Andrea Kansler. Shout out to my friend. She sat in a spa in a lagoon with me for seven hours.

[May Martin]

What? Yes.

[Tig Notaro]

Were you drunk?

[Fortune Feemster]

No. Neither would. We were so tired and like. But we were both on the same page of just wanting to chill. That like, we just were like, oh, she just texted me. Oh my God. It's like we're still. It's empatico.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, my God.

[Fortune Feemster]

Are you in love? No. She's like my sister.

[Tig Notaro]

I don't know what you're up to.

[May Martin]

Can you get your friend Andrea to come up to Lake Arrowhead?

[Fortune Feemster]

Well, she lives in Nashville now, but you would love her company.

[Tig Notaro]

We met her. We hung out with her.

[Fortune Feemster]

That's right, y'. All. Y' all met her at the rhyme.

[Tig Notaro]

She's great.

[Fortune Feemster]

But, yeah, it was like. You know, one of those days when you're like. You're both, like, on the same page. You're like, we don't want to be on our phones. We want to be in the lagoon for. We got massages on a float in the water.

[Tig Notaro]

It's like you're in Lake Arrowhead.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah, we got a massage in a. In the water, on a float.

[May Martin]

What?

[Fortune Feemster]

The first time y' all didn't seem impressed.

[May Martin]

Is the masseuse treading water while they.

[Fortune Feemster]

Massage the water with you? And it's. It's just.

[Tig Notaro]

Are they hanging onto your raft, going, oh, hold on.

[Fortune Feemster]

They're, like, turning you around and.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, they're standing. They're not treading.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah, they're not treading. That would be hard.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

I wonder how they get the traction to, like. Like, push down without drowning you or pushing you away.

[Fortune Feemster]

They are magical sturdy, I think.

[Tig Notaro]

Not your monkey, not. Not your circus.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah. So that was amazing. And. And that we did get reprimanded after our massages because we were floating in the water and we thought everyone had left. We looked around the lagoon and we didn't see anybody. So we started pretending to be Icelandic women who were lesbians. And we were going, like, I'm going to cut wood and eat root vegetables, and we're going to make sweet love by the fire on a. On a pelt. And.

[Tig Notaro]

And the police came.

[Fortune Feemster]

No. And. And we didn't know that all these people were being massaged behind us, and they had to come over. They said, can you guys please be quiet? And we were, like, shaking, laughing.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, my gosh.

[Fortune Feemster]

And then we did saunas and dry saunas and cold plunges and masks and scrubs. Amazed, laid by the fireplace. Sushi lunch. Best girl.

[Tig Notaro]

You deserve it.

[Fortune Feemster]

I mean, best time in my life. But I will give a shout out if anyone goes to Iceland. Here's what I will say. It's super gay friendly there. They are all allies. It, like, isn't even a thing. They have gay flags every. Everywhere. It's such a welcoming place. But there's this travel company, Pink Iceland, that not only do they do travel tours for people gay and straight, they also put on weddings for people. And they have a lot of people come to Iceland who, like, are from different countries where it's not okay to, like, some of their families don't know. They're gay or like it's not okay to be gay where they're there and they will put on these beautiful weddings for them, even if it's just the two of them. Or two of them. This company is two lesbians and a gay man who run it. And they have the biggest hearts. They took such good care of us. They're amazing. If you ever go there, look them up, they are the company that will take good care of you.

[May Martin]

And you saw the northern lights, right?

[Fortune Feemster]

I saw the northern lights, which is wild. Yeah. We went to their, they have this, their office is five floors up. And we went and we were just chatting with them and they go, oh, they're in the northern lights. And to the naked eye it's kind of hard to see them. They're like, it's just like if you're not familiar with them, but when you take a picture of it, it's like so obvious it's the northern lights. And they go, we've had friends visit for years and never seen them.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feemster]

Like it's supposed to be a good omen.

[May Martin]

That's very auspicious. That's like the Icelandic gods were.

[Fortune Feemster]

That's right.

[May Martin]

Smiling on you.

[Fortune Feemster]

It's just a very healing trip at a time that I really need to. Needed some rest and some healing, of course.

[Tig Notaro]

How great.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Good for you.

[Fortune Feemster]

Thank you.

[May Martin]

You're in New York.

[Tig Notaro]

I am and I'm terribly uncomfortable.

[May Martin]

Oh, boy.

[Fortune Feemster]

Hold on, hold on one second. Get situated.

[May Martin]

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[Podcast Advertiser / Host (varies, includes Ilana Hope Levinson and Dan O'Sullivan in the latter part)]

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[May Martin]

Checking first is smart. So check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate Savings. Vary subject to terms, conditions and availability. Allstate Fire and Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois.

[Podcast Advertiser / Host (varies, includes Ilana Hope Levinson and Dan O'Sullivan in the latter part)]

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[May Martin]

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[Podcast Advertiser / Host (varies, includes Ilana Hope Levinson and Dan O'Sullivan in the latter part)]

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[May Martin]

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[Tig Notaro]

Hey, hold on one second.

[May Martin]

I really liked your Icelandic character.

[Fortune Feemster]

We're going to cut wood. I don't even know. It's like part German. Like Arnold Icelandic. Yeah, I don't, I haven't nailed accents, truth be told. You're like, we know in all honesty, when we were doing these Icelandic women characters, I was being a little dirty.

[May Martin]

Okay, the truth comes out. I'm going to.

[Fortune Feemster]

But I can't, I can't repeat to you what I was saying.

[May Martin]

It was that dirty.

[Fortune Feemster]

It was dirty. And we were, we were crying, laughing, and then got scolded. And we're laughing even more because what I was saying was ridiculous.

[May Martin]

Okay, the truth comes out. Now I really want to know what you were saying.

[Fortune Feemster]

I can't say it on the pod. I can tell you.

[May Martin]

This is like I, I got reprimanded Texted to me. Yeah, text it to me. Right.

[Fortune Feemster]

I mean, I can tell you right now, but Thomas has to beep it or cut it out or plug his ears. I said. I was saying we're going to cut wood and make root vegetables, and then I'm going to you in the.

[May Martin]

Fortune.

[Fortune Feemster]

What I like.

[May Martin]

Okay. Hopefully that's beeped out and you can imagine it. But what I'll say about it is that it was so direct. Like what I was anticipating. They're direct, but it was very direct.

[Fortune Feemster]

They're sturdy. It's because the lesbians that we were meeting that were in a couple, they loved each other, so they'd been together for years and were so into each other still. And I. I loved it. So we were saying that the Icelandic. That's how they talk to each other.

[May Martin]

Yeah, I like that. I like that. I think this is. This is the answer for life, is to be out of the city in nature with. With your sturdy woman eating root vegetables.

[Tig Notaro]

And I'm in the city.

[May Martin]

You're in New York.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. With my entire family. And we've had root vegetables and.

[May Martin]

And how were they?

[Tig Notaro]

They were great. They were great.

[Fortune Feemster]

Iceland's known for the root vegetables. They don't have many fruits there.

[May Martin]

Yeah. They have to grow everything in greenhouses, basically. Right?

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah. They don't have the eat your morning fruits song because they don't have a lot of fruits.

[May Martin]

Do you think they sing eat your morning.

[Fortune Feemster]

It's good one, babe. Morning roots.

[Tig Notaro]

But y' all know.

[Fortune Feemster]

Y' all know how much I love sitting in water.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, I heard. Yeah.

[Fortune Feemster]

For hours at a time. But in Iceland, you. It's so common. Like, that's part of their culture is just being in water and being in saunas. And I love all of this.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feemster]

And their water comes from the. From their. Like, it's natural.

[May Martin]

Yeah. Geothermal.

[Fortune Feemster]

They're like, yeah, it's geothermal and it's hot. And their water bills are, like, non existent there.

[May Martin]

That's another good reason.

[Tig Notaro]

I'll challenge you to a hot tub sitting competition.

[Fortune Feemster]

Really? Because I could sit in a hot tub for hours.

[Tig Notaro]

Same. Same. My family is blown away. I will sit alone in a hot tub for four hours and just. And just stare off and think and do nothing. And Stephanie will be like, are you okay? I'm like, I'm great.

[Fortune Feemster]

Same bud. I could sit forever.

[May Martin]

I'm picturing, like, the sun goes down, everyone's in bed and just looking out the window and seeing your little silhouette. Tig in the hot Tub. Just contemplating life and.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. And sometimes barely even having a thought at all.

[Fortune Feemster]

I think you would love Iceland.

[Tig Notaro]

I have wanted to go for years.

[Fortune Feemster]

You can, like, just rent a cottage there. That and it comes with a hot tub and a sauna. Come on, go look in a root vegetable. Get in touch with pink. Pink Iceland. Those ladies would give you so much great information. They're incredible.

[May Martin]

All right, Tig, what are you up to in New York?

[Tig Notaro]

We are just traveling. Traveling along a little family. We went to the Yankees game last night.

[May Martin]

That's huge for Max and Finn, right?

[Tig Notaro]

Yes, yes. It was massive. And some friends of ours with really, really spectacular seats hooked us up and they had, I mean, one of the best nights and days of their lives because they got to go to batting practice, they got to be down on the field with the players.

[Fortune Feemster]

Whoa.

[Tig Notaro]

Like, it was. The chef cooked us like our own vegan men. Personal menu, what it was.

[Fortune Feemster]

And the chef fancy friends.

[Tig Notaro]

It was so over the top. And it was so generous of our friends to give us these tickets.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

And anyway. And we're gonna go see Wicked. Oh, yeah. And there's a vegan restaurant that we've been excited to try out here, so we're gonna go to that.

[May Martin]

How do Max and Finn show their excitement, like at a baseball game like that, where it's like their dream experience? Are they like chatty or are they kind of stunned, wide eyed, like.

[Fortune Feemster]

Well.

[Tig Notaro]

They'Re very chatty. Just in general. They're very. They're not shy kids. And so a lot of people comment on how they seem like little men because, you know, Finn has all of his stats and he knows the history of all the different stadiums. And so somebody will say something casually like, oh, yeah, you like the. Whatever. Well, my team is this. And he's like, oh, yeah. Well, you know, now they got that bigger budget and then they use their money on blah, blah, blah, player. And so that really, you know, and the guy is like, wow. Yeah, that's true. I don't know if they got a bigger budget. I don't know the terminology or how to talk like that, but. But yeah, they. When we were at the restaurant, they were talking to everybody near us and our wait staff and, you know, they're just. They're just very engaged.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Is what I will say.

[May Martin]

Can you imagine if you went back in time and. And I told you, like your future kids that haven't been born yet, they're going to be these two twin boys who are baseball aficionados and love to chat like, it's so specific, and you can't predict those things, what kids will be into and what they'll like.

[Tig Notaro]

It's so wild. And it's also so wild that my life is baseball and sports all the time. Like, they're on travel teams. So, like, my weekends, when I'm home, I'm driving with Stephanie and Max and Finn everywhere, and we're gone every weekend and we're sitting in bleachers, and then during the weekdays, we are at baseball practice, and when we're home, we're watching baseball and we're. It's a lot.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah. My nephew is on a travel baseball team and all my brother and his wife do his travel.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, it's. It's really something. But, you know, it's like, there's definitely days where you're like, oh, my gosh, I do not feel like going to baseball practice or a baseball game three hours away or whatever. But really, it's like, pretty great that they are interested and out doing stuff, you know? Yeah, that's the really positive thing. And we also. We just came from Denver. We went to Andrea's. Andrea Gibson's memorial, which was at this place, it used to be called the Mercury Cafe. And it's been around for decades. And it is. It's been the heart of artists in Denver. Painters, poets, musicians, comedians, people just always going there, having food, performing, watching others perform. And it's where Andrea first started poetry. It's now called the Pearl, but it is. They haven't really changed it a bit. And it's just so. Such an incredible place. And LA and New York and so many places are known for their artists and creativity. But I'm telling you, the people I came up with in Colorado are some of the most incredible, incredible artists. And Andrea being one of them. And it was so beautiful because there was a private memorial at the Mercury, or as people call it, the Mercury at the Merc. Different friends spoke and then they opened the doors and it was open to the public. And poets from every corner of everywhere came to town. That's incredible. And all night for hours, just different poets doing Andrea's truly greatest hits. And that is what is so wild. As I was sitting there going, oh, my gosh, these are hit poems. And the audience, it was over capacity. They're saying the poems along with Andrea's friends and other poets that came in town, and it was just really so beautiful. And the talent, I cannot express enough. The talent in not just the poetry world, but in Colorado, in Denver, Boulder, those areas I just. I'm so proud to know these people. And Andrea has made so many tremendous friends.

[May Martin]

I just feel like it's amazing to have a poet like Andrea, like, break through. I feel like recently there haven't been a lot of contemporary poets that are. Because it used to be like, the beat poets or in the olden times, poets were the coolest, the most sort of.

[Tig Notaro]

And Stephanie said the other day, she was like, you know, it's wild is not many poets are known by name. And she was like. And from now on, Andrea Gibson has become and will continue to. To become a poet that you know by name. And it is just phenomenal to me.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

The reaction to that episode that we did was so amazing. Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

And. And, oh, my gosh, when I walked through, I mean, so many places that I've been, but especially in Denver and Boulder and at the Mercury Cafe, also known as the Pearl now, people came up to me and just really expressed how appreciative they were that we really got into that and that it was helpful for their grieving. And so that just meant a lot because it was a very authentic moment that we accidentally deep dove into. So I really appreciate all of the kind thoughts and words and expressions, and so, yeah. Very handsome community.

[May Martin]

Very handsome.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah. It's so interesting, like, you know, gathering in that way for this unfortunate situation. But what a magical night that Andrea. Andrea. And Andrea's legacy brought together such an amazing group of people.

[Tig Notaro]

It was so. It was such a beautiful, beautiful night.

[May Martin]

We should do a show in Colorado. I've never been. I'd love to go and.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, my gosh.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, my gosh. We would be slammed. We would be swam.

[May Martin]

You know, I like getting slammed.

[Fortune Feemster]

We should do it. We should figure it out then. Let's check it out.

[Tig Notaro]

I mean, we should. And it would be incredible to include some poets in the show.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Anyway, that's what I've been up to.

[May Martin]

And we're all having very healing summers in a way.

[Tig Notaro]

Absolutely. Yeah, absolutely.

[May Martin]

Except for that hot dog, which I left the. I left the remnants outside because I was hoping that would lure the raccoons.

[Fortune Feemster]

Oh, you don't want to lure the raccoons in.

[May Martin]

I want to get a photo of a raccoon by the time I leave on my film camera. And I've positioned the cameras, like, by all the windows in case I see one.

[Fortune Feemster]

But won't there be, like, eight of them?

[Tig Notaro]

I want that all the better.

[May Martin]

But the point is, I know that's irresponsible. What if bears come. But the point is, in the morning, not a single animal had touched that hot dog. And it just made me realize it's plastic. There's no real food in that.

[Fortune Feemster]

Oh my gosh, that is so funny. Like, even the animals are like, no thanks. No hot dog.

[May Martin]

Yeah, they're like.

[Fortune Feemster]

I have to say, it didn't look like a great hot dog.

[May Martin]

No, of course I don't know what.

[Fortune Feemster]

You did to it.

[May Martin]

I don't know. It's more what I didn't do, like cook it properly or.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah.

[Podcast Advertiser / Host (varies, includes Ilana Hope Levinson and Dan O'Sullivan in the latter part)]

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[May Martin]

I have been slowly decorating my new house and Wayfair has been so handy time and time again. I was basically starting from scratch from my guest room and I wanted to avoid that like generic guest room feeling where the decor feels very disconnected from the rest of your home. And I was able to get great mid century bedside tables as well as a bedspread with colors that match the rest of the room. The best part about Wayfair was I did it all on budget and all in one place. From linens to furniture to lighting, there's something for every style and every home.

[Podcast Advertiser / Host (varies, includes Ilana Hope Levinson and Dan O'Sullivan in the latter part)]

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[Tig Notaro]

You know what's more stressful than packing school lunches?

[Podcast Advertiser / Host (varies, includes Ilana Hope Levinson and Dan O'Sullivan in the latter part)]

Realizing you're out of everything at 7am.

[Tig Notaro]

That'S exactly why I stocked up during Thrive Market's back to school sale. Thrive's been a lifesaver for our family. I do not have time to vet every ingredient or drive to three different stores. Thrive lets me shop by diet values or even food phases because let's be real, my kids taste changes weekly.

[Podcast Advertiser / Guest Speaker]

My latest order was packed with snacks and pantry wins and Yum Earth gummies, aloha bars, poppy sodas, and even the good crisp chips. It all showed up fast and I saved up to 25% while restocking. If you've got a busy schedule and want clean quality options, this is the time. New members also get 30% off their first order and a free gift. I always put off grocery shopping because I don't want to go to the store and deal with long lines and out of stock items. I'm confident if you try Thrive Market, you're going to love it as much as I do. So go to thrivemarket.com handsome and start saving today. Sale ends August 31st. Why drop a fortune on basics when you don't have to? Quince has the good stuff. High quality fabrics, classic fits and lightweight layers for warm weather. All at prices that make sense. Everything I've ordered from Quince has been nothing but solid.

[Podcast Advertiser / Host (varies, includes Ilana Hope Levinson and Dan O'Sullivan in the latter part)]

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[Tig Notaro]

Reach for over and over, like cozy cashmere and cotton sweaters from just $50, breathable flow knit polos and comfortable lightweight pants that somehow work for both weekend hangs and dress up dinners. The best part? Everything with Quint is half the cost of similar brands. I'm going to be traveling this fall and Quint has incredible premium quality suitcases that come in matching colors. I'm also eyeing their Eco compression packing cubes to help me stay organized.

[Podcast Advertiser / Guest Speaker]

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[Tig Notaro]

Quince.com Handsome oh my gosh, you guys, this is I I'm sorry to jump right back really quickly. I just remembered this thing I so many people wrote so many incred, incredible beautiful things. But I just, I keep thinking about Andrea's friend Buddy who was living with Andrea in the end to help. He was an EMT previously, but also an incredible poet. He wrote about how there was this marathon in Boulder that he and Andrea stumbled upon one day and and they were cheering on all of the runners like that were trailing behind. And he was saying like we had no idea that this was our passion in life was to like cheer on exhausted runners. And the way he wrote this, in fact I want to reach out to him and get a copy of it. It was so beautiful. But he just told this beautiful story and in the end he said that was ultimately what Andrea did in life was cheer on exhausted runners in this world.

[May Martin]

Oh, I love that.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh my God, it was so beautiful. Anyway, I just had to acknowledge that it just popped in my mind. Yeah, it was really, really beautiful. Should we get to our question?

[May Martin]

Let's do it.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, why not?

[May Martin]

I'm Very excited. Today's question. Oscar. We've wanted to have her ask a question for so long. I'm so excited. She's a comedian, actor, writer and producer who co created and starred in Broad City. She also co created and starred in the TV adaptation of A League of Their Own, which was so good and so steamy. Starred in no Good Deed on Netflix. She also directed my, my stand up special SAP. Abby Jacobson is asking today's question.

[Abby Jacobson]

Okay, here we go. Okay. I'm curious. Do you guys feel like you've found like a personal style? And I'm asking this because, like, sometimes I see someone, I'm like, God, they just like really tapped into their look and their vibe and they clearly feel really good and confident in what they're wearing. And, you know, it's like, it's a thing that like exudes from them. Do you guys feel like you have that? And if so, like, what is it? When did you find it?

[May Martin]

Yeah, great question.

[Fortune Feemster]

Personal, by the way. By the way, the Broad City show that Abby and Alana created and started in one of my favorite shows of all time.

[May Martin]

Yeah, agreed.

[Fortune Feemster]

It is so funny to the point where I actually want to go back and start it again and watch it all over again. It may. It used to make me cackle.

[May Martin]

It's so rewatchable. Yeah. It was ridiculous and so good. I think Abby has a personal style. I'm interested to hear her answer. But what do you. I, I think other people looking at the three of us would say we have a very distinct personal style. But I don't know if I feel that or do you guys feel that?

[Tig Notaro]

I feel like, as far as personal style. Lesbian.

[May Martin]

Right? Yeah.

[Fortune Feemster]

I just feel like I would have that style too.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. I always tell people that if I ever go missing, I'm scared I'll never be found again because I'm like five five, brown hair, brown eye. I mean, graying, and just look like a generic lesbian. I always am surprised when people recognize me because I'm like, how did anybody recognize me? I look like the most generic lesbian wandering around.

[Fortune Feemster]

No, no, I don't think you were like, generic at all.

[May Martin]

That's what I wanted to hear. Chisel jaw, Tom Cruise, wearing kind of simple, masculine staples. Good quality cottons, you know, like quality cottons.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yes.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I, I think I, I like earth tones.

[May Martin]

Yeah, you like a brown and a green. That's another reason you wouldn't be found if you were lost. You'd wander off in the forest and you'd Blend in.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, the wild animals are feeding off of my carcass. But anyway, that's my style.

[Fortune Feemster]

Better that than the hot dog.

[May Martin]

Any giant. But that hot dog, that giant squirrel that's around here, he could eat you in one sitting.

[Tig Notaro]

Now, to go back to your meal in quotes, please. Why two pieces of. Why two Doritos?

[May Martin]

I've also left out the most embarrassing part of the meal, which was that I did have a sort of date up here who I was trying to impress and thought, oh, no, that was.

[Fortune Feemster]

The meal for the date.

[May Martin]

That's what I served her.

[Tig Notaro]

So it was like a garnish. Two Doritos.

[May Martin]

It was a garnish.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, May, that is.

[Fortune Feemster]

That would have been the time to make the pasta. Pasta.

[May Martin]

I know, because I've been making pasta. Like, I don't know. I panicked.

[Fortune Feemster]

What are we doing? Having a hot dog date?

[May Martin]

I thought I might look good on the grill.

[Tig Notaro]

Was this a lady, a man or a lady or.

[May Martin]

This is a lady who I thought, I'm gonna just stand and grill these hot dogs that couldn't get the grill working. Had to do it in a frying pan. Only had these weird flavored chips. They weren't even Doritos. They were, like, no name brand. And then. And then these two little gherkins.

[Fortune Feemster]

How. But you knew this day was hap. Gonna. Was happening.

[May Martin]

Yeah, and then I got overwhelmed with, like, meal prep. I had a big plan for the.

[Fortune Feemster]

Meal, and then I thought this was prepped.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, I was gonna say that's overwhelmed.

[Fortune Feemster]

This is part of this meal was prepped.

[May Martin]

Yeah. I just. I don't know.

[Tig Notaro]

I thought I had to open the bag of Doritos.

[Fortune Feemster]

Oh, no, man.

[May Martin]

I thought it would be a simple and nostalgic, you know, summer meal.

[Fortune Feemster]

You didn't even steam the buns. Hello.

[Tig Notaro]

Who's to say May didn't steam the buns? You know.

[Fortune Feemster]

I don't know. May, did you steam the bun?

[May Martin]

What? What I actually did is I put the buns on top of the toaster. I balanced on top of the toaster slats. I turned the toaster on, thinking it would toast the buns gently. It burned them black, and it'll smoke coming off. Then I had to do it again and wash them.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

And so what did this lady eat? Your offering?

[May Martin]

We picked at it. We. You know, she took a picture of it.

[Tig Notaro]

Did she have a sense of humor about it?

[May Martin]

Oh, yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Was she like, oh, this is adorable how you prepped for this? And this is all I got.

[May Martin]

She was suitably Appalled, I think. But also, it's a good anecdote with the photo evidence of how bleak it was.

[Tig Notaro]

Did you leave her with a T shirt that said, I went on a date with May Martin and all I got was this hot dog?

[May Martin]

Well, I was trying to justify the presentation. I was like, how cool is it that a hot dog can be the main. And also a side? Like, you got an extra wiener on the side.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah. You did a hot dog and a bun and then a side of hot dog.

[May Martin]

Yeah. Anyway, my personal style.

[Tig Notaro]

Even a burger.

[Fortune Feemster]

Even a burger would have been a better.

[May Martin]

Oh, of course. Anything.

[Tig Notaro]

Charcuterie board.

[Fortune Feemster]

Like, hot dog falls on the bottom of the barrel.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feemster]

List of things to serve on a date.

[Tig Notaro]

Like, we were at the Yankees game and we didn't even have hot dogs.

[May Martin]

Like, you had a full meal.

[Fortune Feemster]

It's like making someone a. Like a grilled cheese, which. That might have even been better.

[May Martin]

I love a grilled cheese.

[Fortune Feemster]

Then you should have done grilled cheese.

[May Martin]

I know, I know. Did you?

[Fortune Feemster]

I don't know. Are we allowed to ask? Did you at least smooch? Did you get.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Fortune. That's so private. You know, May doesn't give details.

[Fortune Feemster]

Like, I needed to know if this hot dog led to something.

[May Martin]

It was more like the hot dog came at the end of a day of stuff. So it was like I was exhausted.

[Fortune Feemster]

You were worn out.

[May Martin]

I was. We'd run out of time. Him to prep the me, you know, that. That was more the situation.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, you got the smooching in first.

[May Martin]

Yeah. So if I had more of the smoo, it wasn't like I needed the meal to seal the deal, you know.

[Fortune Feemster]

Then the deal was sealed.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feemster]

Before the meal, you were too exhausted to even make something proper. Got it. Well, that's the difference.

[Tig Notaro]

And do you want to see this person again?

[May Martin]

Yeah, Listen. Off the pod, I'.

[Tig Notaro]

Now listen. Yeah.

[May Martin]

You know, let's. Personal style. My personal style.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah. Back to your personal style, bud.

[May Martin]

Well, I've had this haircut my whole life, except for two years, 13 to 15, when I went high femme. Like, grew my hair out. So I. I feel like I do have a distinctive look, but I. But clothes I. I really struggled with. And I held on to skinny jeans for a long time after everyone else had moved on. And now I feel like I'm just settling into, like. Yeah, good. Nice jeans. Nice simple things. Anyway, how was that? That's the most boring answer.

[Fortune Feemster]

You love a white tee and a black tee and black jeans.

[May Martin]

Yeah, White tee, black jeans, black tee. Blue jeans.

[Fortune Feemster]

And you definitely have a distinct style with your hair, for sure.

[May Martin]

I'm going back blonder. I'm. I'm using sun in that spray from the 90s that you spray. You know you spray. Yeah, this is what I was. My friend said, you're using sun and does it work? And I said, yeah, it's. You're just spraying bleach on your head. And then I kind of heard what I just said. Like, I'm spraying bleach onto my head.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, that can't be good.

[Fortune Feemster]

I don't know if you guys saw. You know, we. We received some incredible fan art on this for the show.

[Tig Notaro]

Let's see.

[Fortune Feemster]

And our socials posted some of that. They. They periodically post this fan art. And all three of our hair. Our hairs. Head of hairs. What would you call this?

[Tig Notaro]

Heads of hair.

[Fortune Feemster]

Heads of hair.

[May Martin]

All three of our heads of hairs.

[Fortune Feemster]

Hairdos was put. Was put on a vibrator with ties.

[May Martin]

Oh, I saw this on a. On a. Like a wand. Yes, I saw that.

[Fortune Feemster]

So I would say we are pretty distinct because I didn't know who everyone was.

[May Martin]

You knew which vibrator was who.

[Fortune Feemster]

It was your hair on a vibrator. There it is. Thomas Marie, come vibe with us. It's so funny. Our listeners are so creative.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, that's good.

[Fortune Feemster]

So we. Yeah, the hairstyles are styling.

[May Martin]

Fortune. You are a fan of a.

[Tig Notaro]

We have to go back.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah, go back, Tig. Don't leave any stone unturned.

[Tig Notaro]

No, I still wear skinny jeans. What do I do about this?

[Fortune Feemster]

Is it a problem?

[May Martin]

How skinny are they?

[Tig Notaro]

I don't know.

[Fortune Feemster]

I mean, Tig is skinny.

[May Martin]

I think you pull it off.

[Fortune Feemster]

I think the Tig. They're just called jeans.

[May Martin]

Right. I just started getting a lot of flack of people saying, you can't wear those anymore. That's. It's a straight leg. Or even if you're boldly hipster jeans right now. Yeah. So baggy. Too baggy.

[Fortune Feemster]

I think you gotta go, I don't want baggy jeans.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feemster]

What if.

[Tig Notaro]

What if I just want to just go ahead and wear the pants I already have?

[Fortune Feemster]

I think you can, Tig.

[Tig Notaro]

Okay.

[May Martin]

This is what I need to learn from you. It's the way that you own it and are confident about it. It's like, people can pick up that. I'm like, is it okay that I wear these jeans are still skinny. And then they go, no, you gotta change. And I go, okay, but if I just went, hey, I love my jeans, maybe people will be like, Where'd you get them? I gotta get some.

[Fortune Feemster]

I think. I think you owning your own thing will be helpful because I. Yeah, I don't really don't care if people like what I'm wearing or not.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, you got your holes covered.

[Fortune Feemster]

I've worn some horrific outfits.

[May Martin]

Covered. She said, you got your holes covered. That's all, Marie. But I guess in the Adam and Eve times, that's what they were. That's all they did, right?

[Fortune Feemster]

Covered holes.

[May Martin]

Cover the holes. Cover the nips.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah, Free the nip. Let's see them titties.

[Tig Notaro]

My son Max wrote a poem the other day called Big Feet and One Purple Nipple.

[Fortune Feemster]

That's what's up.

[May Martin]

I'm sorry, what?

[Tig Notaro]

In Andrea's memory, yesterday was Andrea's. It would have been Andrea's 50th birthday. And we were, you know, doing some Andrea style poetry, but with silly topics. And that's what Max came up with, this big feet and one purple nipple. And then he ended it with y', all, which is how Andrea would do.

[May Martin]

But anyway, Andrea would have loved that.

[Tig Notaro]

Absolutely. I let Meg know, and she was thrilled. Oh, any hoodles?

[May Martin]

Do squirrels have nipples?

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, Thomas, can you Google, please, what.

[May Martin]

If it said, squirrels have one big purple nipple?

[Fortune Feemster]

Yes, they have nipples. Okay.

[Tig Notaro]

Thank God.

[Fortune Feemster]

Thank God we got to the bottom of that.

[Tig Notaro]

So what's your style? Fortune?

[May Martin]

Well, yeah, because you wear a lot of T shirts with phrases on them.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah. Look at this. Des Moines. Hell, yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Okay. I love Iowa.

[Fortune Feemster]

This is just. Someone from Des Moines gave me this shirt, and it's super comfortable, and therefore I wear it.

[Tig Notaro]

That's your style.

[Fortune Feemster]

That's my style.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. You wear what fans send.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah. As long as it's. As long as it's comfortable. If it's a scratchy, you know, those thick, scratchy tees. I don't wear those.

[Tig Notaro]

Okay.

[May Martin]

Right.

[Fortune Feemster]

And so if anyone gives me one of those, thank you, but I'm not gonna wear it. But if it's like a nice, cozy, like, soft cotton tee, that's. I will wear that for sure.

[Tig Notaro]

We should come up with some weird thing to put on the T shirt, because we know you'll wear a free.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah, I don't care what it says. It says Des Moines hell, yes.

[May Martin]

Is that part of it? Because you're. You're good with money? Do you like. Do you like shopping or not like it? And you're just like. So it's easier to wear merch?

[Fortune Feemster]

I mean, I will say I have, in the last year, really been enjoying wearing suits.

[May Martin]

Yes.

[Fortune Feemster]

So when I've had to elevate for something, like, I hosted the, you know, Jimmy Kimmel show, and I wore three really fun suits, and I really enjoyed that process of.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feemster]

With his. The show stylist. That they each had fun colors, and the shirts were, like, vibrant. I like. So I've been enjoying experimenting with suits and colors and patterns. That's been a real treat. Now, I don't wear a suit, obviously, and everyday life, I'm not like Paul Feig, but I. I just. When there's an event or something that requires me dressing up, I'm. I'm really into suits right now.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Good to know.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

I once had a suit made, like, tailored, and I thought that would be good. And then he said, do you want to embroider, like, a secret message to yourself on the pocket inside? And I wasn't prepared for the question. And I. I went, yeah, let it be. I'm so embarrassed when I go. It's so corny. Let it be in my skin.

[Tig Notaro]

Why is that corny?

[May Martin]

I don't know. It's like the most obvious beetles thing. I should have gone, I.

[Tig Notaro]

You know, I am the walrus.

[May Martin]

Yeah. I'm the walrus.

[Tig Notaro]

Or cuckoo.

[Fortune Feemster]

Cuckoo kachoo.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feemster]

I said cuckoo karoo.

[Tig Notaro]

Really?

[Fortune Feemster]

You say cuckoo career. I don't listen to the Beatles very much. Okay.

[Tig Notaro]

Clearly.

[Fortune Feemster]

But, yeah, my style is just being comfortable. Yeah. Where Tig is being a lesbian, I'm being comfortable. And same deal. And my hair, like, you're, like, you said, my. My hair has been this style and cut for probably 23 years.

[Tig Notaro]

Wow.

[May Martin]

I like how specific, roughly.

[Fortune Feemster]

It was, like, around. Around college.

[Tig Notaro]

23 and a half years. I've been.

[Fortune Feemster]

I discovered late my hair was trying. What kind of was a triangle? A little bit in high school. And then I learned about layers.

[Tig Notaro]

Wait, did nobody else around, you know about layers?

[Fortune Feemster]

No, nobody told me. Hey, girl, look. Like Gilda Radner's character.

[May Martin]

Triangle head. A thick triangle head.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah. And amazing. Once I discovered layers, I was like, I like this. Let's stick with it. But, like, what else would my hair even be? I don't pigtails. So, like, what it is, you know.

[May Martin]

Curly hair is hard, right?

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah. People straightened it. I look insane.

[May Martin]

Well, I'm picturing your character. Brenda has straight hair, right?

[Fortune Feemster]

She does. That's a wig.

[May Martin]

That's a wig. Right.

[Fortune Feemster]

Because I was. I was straighten it, straightening it to do that character. And I was like, this is not gonna fly. I cannot do this every time I do this character. So I Just got a wig.

[May Martin]

I wonder if any of us have, like, a big style makeover in our future, or have we landed pretty much where we're at?

[Fortune Feemster]

Oh, no, I don't like if.

[May Martin]

No, you're done.

[Fortune Feemster]

Looks very different, but, like.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, also.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah, I think take's done.

[Tig Notaro]

I'm done.

[Fortune Feemster]

I'm just getting more gorgeous as I. As the older I get so that I can't.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, right.

[May Martin]

No, you are. Sorry.

[Tig Notaro]

That's a sincere. Yeah.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

I wonder. Like, in the old days, like in the 60s, people wore such colorful, fun things, and now it feels like pretty normcore.

[Fortune Feemster]

I just love that. Of all people weighing in on style, us. I mean, we are handsome. We're so handsome. For sure.

[May Martin]

Influencers.

[Fortune Feemster]

Wearing T shirts on our. Our picture for our podcast. We do look very handsome.

[Tig Notaro]

Yes, we do.

[May Martin]

So when we're feeling ourselves that day.

[Fortune Feemster]

When the three of us actually try, we. We can really turn it out.

[Tig Notaro]

My hair's looking way grayer than when we first started the podcast. Should I dye my hair?

[May Martin]

No, don't dye it. You're rocking it.

[Tig Notaro]

Okay.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah, like your hair.

[Tig Notaro]

Okay. All right, everyone calm down.

[May Martin]

I think if you dyed it, it would be, like, a solid block color, and this has many dimensions.

[Tig Notaro]

Well, I just. I'm having these moments where I. And I've talked about this before how, you know, working with different actors, they've clearly had Botox or different work done, and. And I just thought, wouldn't it be fun if I just showed up with my hair dyed Botox in my forehead and got my teeth dyed bleached white?

[Fortune Feemster]

My teeth died.

[Tig Notaro]

Whatever. But get my. Get my teeth. My teeth died. Purple teeth. I just thought it would be so funny to show up with just dark hair, white teeth, and Botox and, like.

[May Martin]

Lip filler and cheekbone.

[Fortune Feemster]

Oh, I would love to see you with nothing.

[Tig Notaro]

No, nothing too extreme, but just something where I'm kind of keeping up, you.

[Fortune Feemster]

Know, with Kim Kardashian.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, I'm always trying to keep up with that one.

[Fortune Feemster]

You should suddenly have a big old ass. Get an ass implant.

[May Martin]

Yes.

[Fortune Feemster]

You never know.

[Tig Notaro]

No, I have a pretty good idea.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah, you feel. You feel like you're set? All dumpster tits over there is set.

[Tig Notaro]

Don't call me that. Should we hear what Abby has to say?

[May Martin]

Yes, please.

[Abby Jacobson]

Okay, I'm gonna answer the question. May told me I have to answer the question, which I didn't realize until now. I think I asked this question because I'm really curious when people find this their style, because I struggle with It. And sometimes I feel like I got it. And sometimes I'm like, what the. Did I. What was I wearing there? What was I thinking? You know, I think the moments. I'm so sorry. I'm like, truly, like, walking around New York. The moments where I felt most confident were like when I stick to, like, a classic sort of basic. And when I've sort of found a uniform for myself. Oh, I'm rambling. I don't know if I have it. I think this is a never ending question and something that is sort of always evolving as we change because, like, our styles change and, like, the way we feel most comfortable and confident changes. Right.

[Fortune Feemster]

Whoa.

[Abby Jacobson]

So did I ask a question that can't be answered? I'm sorry.

[Fortune Feemster]

It is always evolving. And I'm glad she didn't get run over by a car.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

That felt like an episode of Broad Cities.

[Fortune Feemster]

I did feel like that. Yeah. I definitely have gone back and seen pictures online that I'm horrified by what I'm wearing. I know. I went through a sweater vest phase. That wasn't great. Yes. And I went through a vest phase that wasn't great.

[Tig Notaro]

What was the other one that wasn't great?

[Fortune Feemster]

Sweater vest. And vest.

[Tig Notaro]

Vests are great. Sweater vests are great. Said the one that dresses like a lesbian.

[Fortune Feemster]

There was a period of time where my T shirts were a little too short.

[May Martin]

I like a cropped tee.

[Fortune Feemster]

I'm not supposed to be wearing a crop tee.

[May Martin]

What's supposed? What is supposed?

[Tig Notaro]

I wonder, are you wearing a cropped tee to, like, pick up a dude? Were you like, hey, was it in those days?

[Fortune Feemster]

Me?

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feemster]

I was never picking up dudes.

[Tig Notaro]

But when you thought you were straight.

[Fortune Feemster]

Is that when dudes were interested? They certainly didn't want me in a crop tee.

[Tig Notaro]

But I'm saying, is that why you were wearing one?

[Fortune Feemster]

No, I wasn't purposely wearing a cropped tee. I wore T shirts that were just too short. It was an accident.

[Tig Notaro]

Okay.

[Fortune Feemster]

It wasn't like I was like. It wasn't like this. It was like, just shy of my belly. Like, my belly was poking at me. We're all doing our best, you know? So. Yeah, I don't love to Google myself from the past because some of those outfits especially, and on red carpets too, where I knew my picture was being taken, I looked horrible.

[May Martin]

It's good to have a couple of friends who are brutally honest with you. And I. I was about to do a red carpet for my. My friend's show, and I was with her, and she said, is that what you're wearing. And it was a, a big swing, like a kind of Harry Styles esque, like floral jacket. And I was like, no, you're right, this is insane. And then just wore a white T shirt. Felt much better.

[Fortune Feemster]

See, back to your style.

[Tig Notaro]

I was on a red carpet with Reese Witherspoon one time and she is really good at giving me a hard time. And I happen to be wearing a long black coat on the. And she turns while we're being interviewed and points out cat hair all over my black jacket. She was like, is this cat hair? And I was like, probably. Yes, it probably is.

[Fortune Feemster]

It's from Kitty City.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, Kitty City made its way out here.

[Fortune Feemster]

Well, our podcast is all about handsome being whatever it is to you.

[Tig Notaro]

That's right, Fortune Marie.

[Fortune Feemster]

Handsome is in the eye of the beholder as well. You're handsome to people for different reasons and you're handsome to yourself for different reasons. And your style can be whatever it is you want as long as you feel good.

[Tig Notaro]

Fortune.

[Fortune Feemster]

That's right. That's what being handsome is.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. We're a handsome trio.

[May Martin]

And thanks, Abby, for the question.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah, thanks, Abby. We're all very confused about our own styles. Even Abby.

[May Martin]

That's what it seems like. I will say I was at Abby's wedding and she looked stunning in what she chose to wear. And weddings are hard. Yeah. And I always think Abby looks very stylish.

[Fortune Feemster]

It's.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

The classics.

[Tig Notaro]

It's. Yeah. It's interesting when you, when you see that certain people that you think look great, doubt how they look.

[May Martin]

I know.

[Tig Notaro]

You're like, you look like a million bucks, kid.

[May Martin]

You look like a million bucks.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. Look like a million bucks, kid.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Well, that was a delightful episode. I'm going to tell you what I'm up to, folks. I am going to be at Dynasty Typewriter in Los Angeles on September 21st. And then I'm going to be at the Beau Rivage Resort & Casino September 27th in Biloxi, Mississippi. Check tignotaro.com for more dates because the show go the the road goes on forever.

[Fortune Feemster]

This weekend I'm in Spokane, Washington at the Great Outdoors Comedy Festival. Then I have San Antonio and Houston, Texas, and then Norfolk and Richmond, Virginia, Washington, D.C. portland, Maine, Boston, Mobile, Alabama, New Orleans and Atlanta. A bunch of other stuff. Salt Lake, Chicago, Fresno, San Jose. Tickets at my website, fortunebeamster.com.

[May Martin]

I have a Largo show in LA on September 17th. Yeah. And I really want people to come. It's going to be a really fun special one. And then Wayward is coming out on Netflix September 25th, so just excited for that.

[Fortune Feemster]

Yeah, the trailer looks so good.

[May Martin]

Thanks, man.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, also, if anybody's interested in seeing the Andrea Gibson documentary called Come See Me in the Good Light that will be premiering on Apple TV on November 14th. So please tell your friends. Also, tell your friends and loved ones about this handsome pod. Subscribe to the show, subscribe to our YouTube channel and share your favorite episode with somebody and help us build this very handsome community. And until next time, keep it handsome.

[May Martin]

Handsome is hosted by Me, May Martin, Tig Notaro and Fortune Feimster. The show is produced, recorded and edited by Thomas Willette. Email [e-mail] and please follow us on social media at handsomepod.

[Fortune Feemster]

What a podcast.

[May Martin]

What a podcast. That was a hitgam podcast.

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[May Martin]

Like, you know, to check and see if your local firefighters have an annual calendar available for purchase. It never hurts to look at handsome firefighters when you're checking a date.

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[Fortune Feemster]

And I'm Dan o'. Sullivan.

[Podcast Advertiser / Host (varies, includes Ilana Hope Levinson and Dan O'Sullivan in the latter part)]

And this is the Outfit, the New Podcast From Higher Ground and Headgun.

[May Martin]

Now, we're two journalists who are slightly obsessed with the mob and organized crime.

[Fortune Feemster]

And other nefarious stuff like that.

[Podcast Advertiser / Host (varies, includes Ilana Hope Levinson and Dan O'Sullivan in the latter part)]

Every week we're gonna bring you a story about a mobster. Some you've heard of, some you definitely haven't. But all of them are gonna help explain why America is like this.

[Fortune Feemster]

See, the mob explains all sorts of things, from milk expiration dates to why we got into Cuba to Las Vegas gay bars. Who knew? Who knew the mobs in the involved.

[Podcast Advertiser / Host (varies, includes Ilana Hope Levinson and Dan O'Sullivan in the latter part)]

All that and more. Subscribe to the Outfit wherever you get your podcasts and watch video episodes on YouTube. New episodes every Thursday.