Podcast Summary: "Ashlyn Harris asks about Handsome starter packs"

Handsome – Headgum
January 20, 2026
Hosts: Tig Notaro, Fortune Feimster, Mae Martin
Guest Question Asker: Ashlyn Harris

Overview

In this lively episode of "Handsome," comedians Tig Notaro, Fortune Feimster, and Mae Martin dive into the world of “handsome starter packs.” In response to a question from former soccer pro Ashlyn Harris, the trio each crafts their essential “handsome kit,” riffing about gadgets, mustaches, cologne, vibrators, and more. The episode balances playful banter about parades, queer stories, and pets with heartfelt reflections on friendship, coming out, and personal growth—all while keeping true to the show’s fun, offbeat tone.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Life Updates & Parade Stories

• Mae and Fortune check in on Tig after she rode the Star Trek float at the 60th anniversary Rose Parade in the rain ([05:03–09:55]).

  • Tig describes being unexpectedly moved by the faces in the parade audience:

    "There was such a mix of hope and desperation in people's faces for a happy new Year...just being decent, wonderful people." – Tig Notaro ([06:06])

  • The success of "Handsome" is proven by fans yelling and waving Handsome merch at the parade ([08:34]).

• Fortune and Tig discuss the community vibes at parades, including straight and gay parades, and share personal parade memories ([09:55–12:03]).

2. Listener Question: Coming Out & Crushing

• A listener named Vivi asks for advice about telling her friend she has a crush after just coming out as a lesbian ([18:28]).
  • Mae urges patience:

    "I think...hold off for a minute...If the friendship's important to you, you could put vibes out and see if they're reciprocated." – Mae Martin ([19:21])

  • Fortune affirms: "Nothing wrong with putting a few like, subtle vibes out to see if, you know, maybe that clicks" ([20:11]).
  • Both affirm the importance of building queer friendship and community without rushing romance.

3. Mae’s Road Trip & Adventures in Firsts

• Mae recounts her first solo long drive to Joshua Tree, and a friend's puppy’s dramatic encounter with a cactus, admitting she’s not great in a crisis ([15:05–16:36]).
• The trio riffs on learning to drive, slow driving confessions, and anxiety about new driver magnets ([22:44–24:03]).
• Driving etiquette is explained—especially staying out of the left lane unless passing ([23:32]):

  "The left lane...that's the fast lane. It ain't the cruising lane." – Fortune Feimster ([24:14])

4. Tattoos, Fans & "Little Cowboy"

• Fan tattoos referencing the hosts and podcast, some in unexpected places—#MayMartinsProperty and "Little Cowboy" ([26:07–27:41]).
• The hosts debate the weirdness of hashtags in tattoos and what makes a tattoo timeless ([27:41–28:53]).

5. The "Handsome Starter Pack" – Main Segment

Ashlyn Harris’ Listener Question

• Ashlyn Harris asks:

  "If each of you were to make your very own handsome starter pack, what ridiculous items would you insist have to be included?" ([42:22])

Hosts’ Starter Packs

• Mae Martin:

  • Cinnamon toothpicks
  • Podcasting gear / microphone
  • Burnt mix CD for the car
  • Boy briefs underwear
  • Charcoal and a sketchbook ([43:52–44:52])

• Tig Notaro:

  • Suitcase/briefcase full of mustaches
  • Briefcase (childhood nod), Star Wars action figures
  • Natural deodorant
  • Collection of pets (cats, dogs, goat)
  • Acoustic guitar (for Indigo Girls covers) ([45:06–48:34])

• Fortune Feimster:

  • Suit (matching suit for her dog Biggie)
  • Mont Blanc cologne ("I like to smell good")
  • Sunglasses (hopes not to break them with her belly)
  • Curl cream
  • Vibrator ("Just a little tiny one. Only keychain.") ([57:03–58:53])
  • Wishes for "handsome" starter pack to include fun, playful, or risqué items, keeping with the podcast’s tone.

• Mae, revisited:

  • Strap-on ("the most handsome thing I do") ([58:56]).

• Running Jokes:

  • A gavel and a pineapple (callback to earlier episodes and their “pineapple apart” middle school dance story) ([51:04–51:12]).
  • “Tints and taints”—various inside jokes about merch, makeup, and anatomy ([62:48]).

Ashlyn Harris’ Own Starter Pack

• Gallon-sized water bottle ("my personality at this point")
• Chapstick
• Sexy tool belt, despite not knowing how to use a drill:

  "Because I don't really know how to use a drill, but I like to look capable." – Ashlyn Harris ([61:36])

• The hosts affirm these choices and joke about hydration and looking handy.

6. Memorable Quotes & Moments

• On Parade Sentimentality:

  "When I really locked in with people's faces and eyes, I was really trying to really get them to have a happy new year. I just like, man, please." – Tig Notaro ([06:41])

• On Love Bombing:

  “Love bombing would be high warmth, low intent… constant texting, gifts, talking for hours, but you don't actually have an intention.” – Mae Martin ([33:10])

• On the “Crap Fairy” (discussing how to tell a partner about morning breath):

  “It makes me laugh to think of a little fairy…like you’re sleeping with your mouth open, and she comes over and hikes her prom dress up…it’s the crap fairy.” – Tig Notaro ([35:43])

• On "Exhausted Sausages":

  "These three cats follow each other everywhere...and I call them...exhausted sausages." – Tig Notaro ([64:34])

• On making new podcast merch:

  "All of our merch is made by a seamstress, right? … I think it's mainly the mice on Cinderella." – Tig Notaro ([63:54])

• On their collective resemblance to Ashlyn Harris:

  "If you merged our faces ... we'd all be as attractive." – Tig Notaro ([61:00])

Notable Segments & Timestamps

• [05:03–09:55] — Tig’s moving Star Trek float parade story and audience connection
• [18:28–21:29] — Listener question on coming out and queer friendship advice
• [26:07–28:53] — Tattoos inspired by the show
• [42:22–49:00] — Launch of "Handsome Starter Pack" discussion
• [57:03–58:53] — Fortune’s risqué additions to her starter pack
• [61:00–62:08] — Blending the hosts’ faces to create “the ultimate handsome”
• [64:34–65:43] — Introduction of Tig’s new phrase "exhausted sausages"

Closing Thoughts

"Handsome" as ever delivers a mix of hilarious, heartfelt, and absurd exchanges. The “handsome starter pack” not only becomes a playful vehicle for their personalities and shared inside jokes, but also draws out deeper reflections on community, self-love, and growing up queer. Ashlyn Harris’ question energizes a segment full of wit and good-natured one-upmanship, while memorable stories and recurring jokes foster the show’s cozy enclave of friendship—even if Mae says it wrong.

Listen for…

• Real talk on queer friendship, crushes, and love-bombing ([18:28], [33:10])
• Gag gifts like mustache suitcases and starter pack briefcases ([45:06–48:34])
• The trio’s riffs on parade joy, driving anxieties, and the essential characteristics of “handsome” people ([05:03–13:46], [22:44–24:14])
• Running bits about tattoos, exhausted sausages, and podcast merch ([26:07–28:53], [64:34])
• Quirky moments like the hunt for the “heavy metal” moment in Extreme’s “More Than Words” ([54:56–56:22], [59:35])

Overall, a classic episode full of warmth, relatability, and the signature handsome charm.

Episode Index

• 05:03 — Tig’s Parade Anecdote
• 18:28 — Listener Q: Coming Out Crushes
• 26:07 — Tattoos & Fans
• 42:22 — Handsome Starter Pack Begins
• 61:00 — Ashlyn Harris’ Handsome Kit
• 64:34 — “Exhausted Sausages” Explained
• 68:03 — Merch Announcements

All timestamps MM:SS based on raw episode transcript.