Brandi Carlile asks about Jesus

Summary

Podcast Summary: Handsome – "Brandi Carlile asks about Jesus"

Release Date: February 24, 2026
Hosts: Tig Notaro, Fortune Feimster, Mae Martin
Special Guest Question-Asker: Brandi Carlile

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Overview

In this episode of Handsome, comedians Tig Notaro, Fortune Feimster, and Mae Martin are joined (via a guest question) by celebrated singer-songwriter Brandi Carlile. The trio kicks off with their usual mix of playful banter, stories, and gadget demonstrations before diving into a thought-provoking discussion prompted by Brandi: "How do you feel when you hear the word Jesus?" The conversation explores personal experiences with religion, the cultural weight it carries in queer spaces, and how individual relationships with faith have evolved, particularly against the backdrop of current social and political issues.

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Main Discussion Points & Insights

1. Catching Up & Slumber Party Vibes (02:00–19:00)

• The hosts are recording together in-person, which they note brings "electric" energy (02:11).
• They chat about driving anxieties, car washes, and the humor (or lack thereof) of car wash attendants.
• A tangent on friendship and co-worker bracelets, followed by jokes about makeup, hotel quirks (the elusive hair dryer, shower caps), and traveling for gigs.

Notable Quote:
"That was the cleanest we've ever introed this podcast." – Fortune Feimster (02:04)

2. Gadgets, Foot Massagers, and Embarrassing Stories (19:00–35:00)

• Mae demonstrates a new foot massager, which the group tries on-air, leading to much physical comedy and commentary on personal self-care routines.
• Extended digression on ab workout machines, invisible mascara, and the evolution of hotel amenities.
• The trio discusses bodily functions and the humorous intimacy (and awkwardness) of farting in relationships.

Memorable Moment:
Mae recounts a past partner's creative attempt to minimize fart noise:
"She was sneakily just pulling her own butt cheeks apart." (32:09)
The group debates whether Mae has a “fart fetish”—to her adamant denial.

3. The Question: "How Do You Feel When You Hear Jesus?" (39:40–59:00)

Brandi Carlile’s Question (39:40)

"How do you feel when you hear the word Jesus? ...Do you feel like triggered or curious? Inspired? Concerned? Distrustful? How does the word Jesus make you feel in these times that we're living through?" – Brandi Carlile (39:43)

Personal & Cultural Reflections

• Mae Martin:

  • Grew up in a very atheist family in Canada; sees Jesus as "a guy" with good stories, detached from negative religious authority.
  • "I like Jesus. ...I got really into Jesus as a guy, but so it doesn't have that—I don't feel triggered." (41:08)
  • Notes the story-driven, rebelling-against-hypocrisy version of Jesus provided in their upbringing.

• Tig Notaro:

  • Raised Catholic, but “not in a house where God and Jesus were really mentioned.”
  • Experiences with Christian families who “led with Christianity” but showed love and openness, including to her as an out queer person.
  • Relates the experience of being welcomed by religious people:
    "I loved what they represented... I was good with them talking about Jesus because there was just nothing seemingly off." (50:12)
  • Draws a distinction between people who use faith as a weapon and those who use it as a tool for compassion.

• Fortune Feimster:

  • Deep Southern upbringing where church was “the fabric of society” and her mom is still active in the United Methodist Church.
  • Emphasizes the positive elements: "people at church check on you," "community," and the "treat others as you want to be treated" values.
  • Acknowledges the pain caused when faith is used to exclude or control ("the line is getting more and more blurred" between church and state, 58:25).
  • Expresses openness:
    "I have not like, shunned that. I still see value in that and like a belief system and a morality type of way." (46:30-46:52)

Wider Social Commentary

• Discusses how Christianity (and “the word Jesus”) can be triggering for LGBTQ people, especially those rejected by families or faith communities.
• The group repeatedly draws a line between the teachings/figure of Jesus (“a badass” rebel, supportive of outcasts) and institutional religion, especially when faith is wielded as a tool for exclusion.
• Questions of hypocrisy:
  • Mae points out:
    “We’ve always kind of known, like, the people who are most outspokenly anti-gay and fire and brimstone... literally six months later for sex crimes” (47:49)
• The influence of the Religious Right in the US is brought up as a source of concern for personal and civil safety, especially for LGBTQ and reproductive rights.

Brandi Carlile’s Follow-Up (56:41)

Brandi shares how writing about her faith and queerness drew a strong response from LGBTQ people wanting to talk about the “complicated” legacy of Christian upbringing.
"There are still parts of this—of the Christian faith and their childhood religion that are with them... in good ways and in horrible ways." (56:41)

Closing Reflections

• Tig and Fortune boil it down to "wanting to be accepted, wanting to feel welcome and safe" (58:06).
• Fortune reiterates that issues arise "when it gets intermingled with, like, government"—underscoring the need for separation of church and state (55:10).

---

Notable Quotes & Moments

• On Jesus’ image:
  “Everything about him is great. Supportive [of] women, friends with sex workers... such a badass.” – Mae Martin (43:31)

• On the church as community:
  “There’s really great things about it where it’s the fabric of society there, where... there’s community, many positive things like that.” – Fortune Feimster (45:30)

• On conditional acceptance:
  “If you think I’m going to hell, just pipe down and let’s have a nice dinner.” – Tig Notaro (53:25)

• On shifting times:

  • Tig notes a subtlety in Brandi’s language:
    “The times that we're living through feels very different than the times we’re living in.” (42:03)

• On using religion to exclude:
  “When it’s used as a weapon to be like: 'You’re okay, and you’re not,' so that’s where it becomes an issue.” – Fortune Feimster (47:32)

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Important Timestamps

• Group energy & in-person banter: 02:00–05:00
• Hotel quirks & gadget tryout: 16:00–28:00
• Mae’s fart story & intimacy: 31:35–34:00
• Brandi Carlile’s question introduced: 39:40
• Main discussion on Jesus/religion: 41:00–59:00
• Brandi’s follow-up & wrap-up: 56:41–59:00

---

Tone & Style

The episode maintains the signature warm, irreverent, and introspective tone of Handsome, with the hosts deftly moving between silly, vulnerable, and probing as they explore the meaning of faith, identity, and acceptance. While often playful, the show doesn’t shy away from acknowledging the complexities—including trauma and hope—carried by queer people whose lives intersect with Christian culture.

---

Summary

This episode of Handsome is a nuanced, funny, and candid interrogation of faith, queerness, and modern identity. Brandi Carlile’s question elicits a heartfelt conversation about personal histories with Christianity—and how, even for those who leave the church or experience its exclusion, the image of Jesus can persist as a source of inspiration or pain. The hosts affirm the value of love, openness, and critical thinking while using plenty of humor to keep things grounded and accessible.

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For Listeners

If you’re seeking:

• Candid queer perspectives on religion and belonging
• Laughs about gadgets, car makeouts, and bodily functions
• Honest takes on the blurred lines of faith, culture, and safety

This episode is both entertaining and thoughtful, offering affirming insights for LGBTQ listeners and anyone re-examining their relationship with spirituality.

Transcript

[Announcer]

This is a Headgum podcast.

[Sponsor Voice]

Checking Allstate first could save you hundreds on car insurance. That's smart. Not checking that. I've got my handsome tuxedo ready to go before a big event. Big mistake. Now I'm walking the red carpet in a T shirt and jeans.

[Announcer]

Yeah, checking first is smart. So check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings vary, subject to terms, conditions and availability. All Allstate North American Insurance Company and

[May Martin]

affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois, in partnership with Airbnb. Let's talk a little bit about travel, May. After I'm done with all this filming I'm doing, I really want to just take a weekend off and relax. I love booking stays on Airbnb because you get all the amenities of a home. And I definitely want a place with a private outdoor hot tub so I can take a long soak and look up at the stars.

[Fortune Feimster]

And here's my question, though.

[May Martin]

Where should I go?

[Meg Stalter]

I mean, if you're willing to go a bit further.

[Announcer]

I do love mixing in a hot tub with the cold. So Colorado, maybe, or even the desert.

[Meg Stalter]

I got a house out there on Airbnb with some friends. It was so good.

[Announcer]

Everyone had their own room. We cooked up, like, family style meals in the kitchen. If you wanted somewhere closer to home, would you do Palm Springs?

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, for sure.

[Announcer]

Another reason I love Airbnb is that booking with them feels so much more special than hotels. I've stayed at hotels where I've gotten on an elevator, had to find the right floor, and then search for the pool in the hot tub, and then you find out they're closed. I just love the privacy.

[May Martin]

Okay, well, this inspired me to book something soon, so I appreciate it, buddy. And if you're listening out there and thinking about your next trip, I highly recommend you check out Airbnb and do some traveling yourself.

[Meg Stalter]

Handsome chatting friends on the handsome pod. Chatting with friends on the handsome pod.

[Fortune Feimster]

Cheers. Welcome to the Hands of Pod. I'm Fortune Feemster.

[Meg Stalter]

I'm May Martin.

[Tig Notaro]

And I am Tig Notaro.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, my God. That was the cleanest we've ever introed this podcast. Yeah, yeah, I just went for it.

[Meg Stalter]

I. I took a risk already because we're in the same place. Our energy's electric.

[Fortune Feimster]

Feel the energy.

[Tig Notaro]

You stuck the landing.

[Fortune Feimster]

Are you not ready? Was it too soon?

[Tig Notaro]

Whoa.

[Fortune Feimster]

I was ready.

[Meg Stalter]

I was ready. Yeah, I'm a sweaty hand.

[Announcer]

Sorry.

[Meg Stalter]

Because I drove here.

[Fortune Feimster]

That's all right. I did see May pull Up in their.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Why are your hands sweaty? Because you drove here.

[Fortune Feimster]

I still nervous about driving.

[Meg Stalter]

I. Hold tight. Two hands, ten and two. Yeah, gripping.

[Tig Notaro]

Like, gripping?

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah, yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Ripping.

[Fortune Feimster]

I think so.

[Meg Stalter]

I think so. When the car washed, though, how was that?

[Tig Notaro]

Did you mean to?

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah, I think, yeah, I meant to.

[Tig Notaro]

Okay.

[Meg Stalter]

And it was. I loved the whole experience. How the guys kind of tell you, okay, move forward and you drive.

[Tig Notaro]

I can't stand that. I mean, I told you I hate it.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, really?

[Meg Stalter]

I can imagine.

[Announcer]

Depends on the guy.

[Meg Stalter]

I had a nice guy who we were joshing around a bit, but you had a humorless.

[Tig Notaro]

No, I'm not looking for a funny.

[Meg Stalter]

You're not looking for a friend.

[Tig Notaro]

No, I'm not.

[Fortune Feimster]

I'm just trying to park the car, right?

[Tig Notaro]

And if somebody gets behind me and they're like. And I haven't asked them to, they're just like, get away. Like, get out of here. You know, when they just like. I guess it feels like mansplaining or something to me, I'm like, I'm all good, buddy.

[Fortune Feimster]

Carsplaining.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. Carsplaining. Donate it.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah.

[Meg Stalter]

Look at your bracelets. See, when we're together in the room, there's so much more stimuli bracelets.

[Tig Notaro]

You know what I love about you? When your voice makes that. God, yeah, yeah, that's. That's. That's the sweet spot.

[Fortune Feimster]

Okay.

[Tig Notaro]

Let me tell you about this. My childhood friend Eliza, she made this for me. She makes bracelets and clearly. And she's Korean, so she has a little Korean something on here.

[Meg Stalter]

Oh, is it like.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, there it is. I don't know what it says.

[Fortune Feimster]

Okay.

[Tig Notaro]

Can you read Korean?

[Fortune Feimster]

I cannot.

[Tig Notaro]

Okay.

[Meg Stalter]

And then I can, but I choose not to at the moment.

[Tig Notaro]

You choose not to read Korean. And then this is from Sandro, who is the number two on Starfleet Academy. He's right under Holly Hunter. And he's the young, kind of rebellious kid on the show that Holly's trying to, you know. Anyway, so he got these for all the cast after season one. And my character on Star Trek, my name is on here, Reno.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, that's nice.

[Meg Stalter]

I liked it. Yeah. Maybe we need friendship bracelets.

[Tig Notaro]

Are these friendship bracelets?

[Meg Stalter]

Well, if you got one for everyone on the crew, yeah. That's a friendship bracelet.

[Tig Notaro]

This is a co worker bracelet.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, wow.

[Tig Notaro]

We need to get co workers.

[Fortune Feimster]

Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

True, I think.

[Fortune Feimster]

Are we. We're not friends.

[Tig Notaro]

We're more than friends.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah. I knew you were gonna come around playing hard to get them.

[Tig Notaro]

I always come around I swear to God.

[Fortune Feimster]

Twig. Come on.

[Meg Stalter]

Come on now. Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

Alone. Yeah.

[Meg Stalter]

Look how happy I am.

[Tig Notaro]

I know.

[Fortune Feimster]

Did you guys notice I have makeup on?

[Tig Notaro]

No, I don't have my glasses on.

[Meg Stalter]

Notice that you have makeup on? Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Do you look hot?

[Fortune Feimster]

Except for ones that right here.

[Meg Stalter]

Very.

[Tig Notaro]

She looks hot.

[Meg Stalter]

Yes. Yeah. Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

I'm not even gonna put my glasses on.

[Fortune Feimster]

Just tell me. I just have makeup on.

[Tig Notaro]

I'm gonna put my glasses, put them

[Fortune Feimster]

on, take it all in. I was filming today.

[Meg Stalter]

It's really subtle, though. It's like, it's just bringing out your inner beauty.

[Fortune Feimster]

My curls are tight.

[Meg Stalter]

Your curls are tight?

[Fortune Feimster]

What are we talking about? The only thing that's tight around here, if you know what I mean.

[Tig Notaro]

I don't.

[Fortune Feimster]

I'm not gonna.

[Tig Notaro]

Something is tight.

[Fortune Feimster]

I'm not gonna go any further.

[Tig Notaro]

Okay.

[Meg Stalter]

I'm wearing makeup too.

[Fortune Feimster]

Are you?

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

Always clear mascara.

[Meg Stalter]

No, not today. Just the usual boy brow.

[Fortune Feimster]

Nikki Laser heard the thing about us riffing on clear mascara and always laughs about us.

[Meg Stalter]

She did.

[Fortune Feimster]

Talking about clear mascara.

[Meg Stalter]

That's crazy. It's crazy that people hear this podcast

[Tig Notaro]

and especially friends and family. I know where they're like, oh, my gosh. I was listening this and that. I'm like, you listen to my show?

[Meg Stalter]

I know. I went on a walk around the rez with friend of the pod, Alison Brie, and that was.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, you did?

[Meg Stalter]

I always just. I never quite believe that she listens to it. It's almost like I want to test her. But she really does.

[Fortune Feimster]

She really takes me occasionally with some reference to the pod.

[Meg Stalter]

She knows what's going on.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, she's the best.

[Meg Stalter]

She's so funny. It was such a nice walk.

[Tig Notaro]

If only she were in good shape, though.

[Meg Stalter]

If only she was prettier.

[Tig Notaro]

If only she was attractive and in good shape.

[Fortune Feimster]

They're a good looking couple, those two.

[Meg Stalter]

They're a great looking couple and really smart and writers and. Yeah, I'm into it.

[Tig Notaro]

And they. Yeah, they're collaborative.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[Meg Stalter]

I.

[Tig Notaro]

Yes.

[Meg Stalter]

Well, unrelated.

[Fortune Feimster]

Okay, that's fine. Who cares? We can pivot.

[Meg Stalter]

Okay. So, you know, I'm prepping to go on tour and part of what I'm thinking about is, like, is magic real and can I affect reality with my mind?

[Fortune Feimster]

So this is part of the standup

[Meg Stalter]

sort of the themes I'm thinking about.

[Fortune Feimster]

Hilarious to me.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah.

[Sponsor Voice]

Well, you know what?

[Tig Notaro]

I don't know if you know this. This is true. Magic is kind of moving in on comedy. Do you know this? In, like, popularity.

[Meg Stalter]

Oh, like close up magic.

[Tig Notaro]

Well, like, Magicians.

[Announcer]

Yeah, magicians.

[Tig Notaro]

Magicians. That whole world is becoming gigantic.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah. What does that signify? I wonder about where we're at. We just want to be astounded, but I'm more like spirituality or things that 200 years ago, they would have said were magic, but now we know it's science. Anyway, so I keep seeing those experiments with rice. I think I've talked about it. You put rice in two jars, and then you write I love you on one of the jars. You write I hate you on the other jar. And every day you go to the one I love you so much. And then to the bad one, you're like, I hate you. You're awful.

[Tig Notaro]

Is this what you are doing?

[Meg Stalter]

I'm in your house every morning and it's a really weird thing to do by yourself, but.

[Tig Notaro]

Or even with people.

[Sponsor Voice]

I would say.

[Announcer]

Yeah.

[Meg Stalter]

And I've seen this online tons of times where the. The one that says I hate you rots faster.

[Fortune Feimster]

Really? Yes.

[Meg Stalter]

Guys, guess what happened?

[Fortune Feimster]

What?

[Tig Notaro]

You ate it.

[Fortune Feimster]

You had a beef bowl.

[Meg Stalter]

The one I say I love you

[Tig Notaro]

to said I love you back.

[Meg Stalter]

It's rotting. So what is it? Is my love rotten or am I. Did I smother it?

[Fortune Feimster]

Is it rotten?

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Do you normally say rotten, love rotten.

[Meg Stalter]

I don't know why I said it like that.

[Tig Notaro]

Well, your accent's all over the place.

[Fortune Feimster]

Rotten.

[Meg Stalter]

I don't think I would normally say

[Fortune Feimster]

rotten, but I don't think your love's rotten. I think you got some bad rice.

[Meg Stalter]

I mean, it's significantly. No, but it was the same batch of rice.

[Tig Notaro]

So the one. The.

[Fortune Feimster]

The.

[Meg Stalter]

Thank you for digging into this.

[Tig Notaro]

I love you rice is rotten. And this is I hate you rice.

[Meg Stalter]

Perfectly pristine cooked rice.

[Fortune Feimster]

It's cooked.

[Meg Stalter]

Cooked white rice.

[Fortune Feimster]

Okay.

[Meg Stalter]

And I'm not saying like one. I mean, the one I say I love you too is black mold. And the other one. Perfectly pristine.

[Fortune Feimster]

This is weird. At what point do you toss it?

[Meg Stalter]

Soon. I think it's time.

[Tig Notaro]

Maybe time to break up with your rights.

[Fortune Feimster]

Maybe the I love you is hearing you say I hate you. You're doing it too close to each other.

[Meg Stalter]

That's possible. But then how come they I hate you one's not because it's a narcissist

[Fortune Feimster]

and it only hears it. You love it.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah. I don't know what the hell's going on, because I've proved something, but not what I was expecting to prove. And I feel. Yeah, worried about what my focus is doing to that rice.

[Tig Notaro]

Is that what part of it is the Hypothesis. I remember that word.

[Meg Stalter]

The hypothesis is that your intention can affect reality. And I've read all about this rice experiment where.

[Tig Notaro]

And this is before you do the experiment, you have a hypothesis and then

[Meg Stalter]

you try to prove the hypothesis, right or wrong. And. Yeah, like, you know how if you're kind to plants, they flourish.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[Meg Stalter]

So it's that kind of. And that's scientifically proven.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[Meg Stalter]

If you sing to them, you talk to them.

[Fortune Feimster]

I flourish in kindness as well.

[Meg Stalter]

Don't we all?

[Fortune Feimster]

Some do. We does. Everyone. Flourishing kindness.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah, People flourish and kindness.

[Fortune Feimster]

Some people like to be her mascots.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah, yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Some aren't really into that.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah, but.

[Fortune Feimster]

But like, you know how they say that girls like a bad boy, right?

[Meg Stalter]

Oh, like they don't flourish in kindness.

[Tig Notaro]

Have you ever liked a bad boy?

[Fortune Feimster]

Me?

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah,

[May Martin]

me.

[Fortune Feimster]

Little old me.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah. Fortune. Imagine in front of you, there's nice boy and bad boy. They're both handsome.

[Fortune Feimster]

Well, I don't like. I don't like boys. So I guess for fun I'd go with the bad boy. Why not? Yeah, spice it up, you know, that sounds fun.

[Meg Stalter]

Like that guy in that show you watch who knows how to put it down.

[Fortune Feimster]

That's right.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

Tell me lies.

[Announcer]

Tell me lies.

[Fortune Feimster]

He's a bad boy.

[Tig Notaro]

I. I think I had a little bit of a thing for some bad girls.

[Announcer]

Bad girls?

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah, of course. Bad girl.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah, yeah, we all like bad girls.

[Fortune Feimster]

Well, I don't want that. I don't want a bad girl.

[Tig Notaro]

No, no, no. Me neither.

[Meg Stalter]

What do we mean by bad?

[Tig Notaro]

Like just people that.

[Fortune Feimster]

Chaos inducing.

[Tig Notaro]

Yes.

[Meg Stalter]

Right, right, right, right.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[Meg Stalter]

I like a bit of it in

[Tig Notaro]

a safe container with rice.

[Meg Stalter]

With rice?

[Sponsor Voice]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

You like a sprinkle of it?

[Meg Stalter]

I like a sprinkle of, like, unpredictable.

[Fortune Feimster]

More than a sprinkle.

[Tig Notaro]

Wait, have you made out any more with the person you made out in

[Meg Stalter]

the car with with that person? I have not.

[Fortune Feimster]

Did I know about this? No.

[Tig Notaro]

Yes, you did.

[Fortune Feimster]

I did remember?

[Tig Notaro]

We did remember. I was let down because I thought it was going.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, that's right. That's right.

[Tig Notaro]

But you guys thought I was let down.

[Fortune Feimster]

One and done.

[Meg Stalter]

I did do. I did have an experience where I kissed someone in my car and I was parked.

[Fortune Feimster]

You love this car now?

[Meg Stalter]

I love this car.

[Tig Notaro]

You need to go to a drive in movie.

[Meg Stalter]

That's all I want to do.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. Can we be in the back?

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Meg Stalter]

Giggling All I want is you guys in my car. Yeah, yeah, that would be great. But. So I was parked in my. But my foot was on the break but then I we kiss and I guess it. I should have had a neutral need

[Fortune Feimster]

to have in park or park. Yeah.

[Meg Stalter]

So then my foot came off the brake and like.

[Fortune Feimster]

Because neutral you will, you will just roll. Yeah, right? Yeah.

[Meg Stalter]

So it was a jump scare for sure. My foot came off the brake and then the car went almost into the car in front of me.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh my God.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, I wish that was the story.

[Fortune Feimster]

That would have been fun.

[Meg Stalter]

I know. Did you still get the kids got the kiss.

[Tig Notaro]

Okay, can I tell you a fun makeout series? Girl, girl, settle in. And let me tell you what was so fun.

[Fortune Feimster]

Okay.

[Tig Notaro]

So there was this girl, you know, we had this thing going for months and. But at the very beginning of it, I told her, I was like, you know what I've always wanted to do is just get a taxi and just drive around town and make out.

[Fortune Feimster]

Love this.

[Tig Notaro]

And she was like, let's do it.

[Fortune Feimster]

And so.

[Tig Notaro]

So we hail a cab and we are macking down.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh my God. It's a risk. You don't put on a show for the driver because they do watch.

[Tig Notaro]

I don't care.

[Fortune Feimster]

I know, I'm just telling you they do. They are watching in the.

[Tig Notaro]

Well, how do you know?

[Meg Stalter]

Cause Fortune makes out like.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh my God, taxis. What in the day.

[Tig Notaro]

Fortune used to be a cab driver.

[Fortune Feimster]

Look at my cabbie.

[Meg Stalter]

Dave do watch.

[Fortune Feimster]

Trust me, they watch and they love it. Okay.

[Tig Notaro]

No, I just thought it was one of the, you know, when you first are meeting and dating or hooking up with somebody, it's like, let's do this. Okay. So get a cab. We're driving around Los Angeles. And that's what I told the guy. I was like, just anywhere. And he was like, okay, cool.

[Meg Stalter]

You want to just drive us around?

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, just drive us around. Okay. So then we pull up

[Fortune Feimster]

to his mother's house.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. We pull up to some store. She wanted to go in and get something.

[Sponsor Voice]

She's an actress.

[Fortune Feimster]

Okay.

[Meg Stalter]

Okay.

[Tig Notaro]

When she gets out of the car, he goes, can I ask you something? And I said, sure. And he said, who is. He said, that woman looks very familiar. Who is she? And I said, I have no idea. After we've been driving around, that's the

[Sponsor Voice]

end of the story.

[Fortune Feimster]

You do? Uh huh. I won't say it, but you can

[Tig Notaro]

say it, but bleep it out. Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

I knew it. How did you know? Smart.

[Meg Stalter]

I don't know who that is. Even you.

[Fortune Feimster]

But I knew that y' all had had a thing. Dated or whatever you call it.

[Meg Stalter]

So funny to have the awkward Just you and the taxi driver in the car, though, as well. Like, after she gets out. And you've just been fully.

[Fortune Feimster]

But also you don't. Yeah, you don't want them being like, I recognize any either. You know what I mean? Like, that's where you want to be anonymous.

[Tig Notaro]

Well, that's why it was fun to just be like, yeah, I don't know. I don't know who she is.

[Meg Stalter]

After you're running. Like, how much was this bill at the end of the day?

[Tig Notaro]

I don't remember. Here's another fun thing.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah, really,

[Tig Notaro]

this is a really fun thing that I could see you enjoying.

[Meg Stalter]

Okay.

[Tig Notaro]

I asked this girl out who we had already been seeing each other, but on a particular date to a hotel room only during the day to order room service and watch a movie.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Oh, that's great.

[Fortune Feimster]

That's really good.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[Meg Stalter]

And so did you have to pay for the night or you found like a. Yeah. And you said, we'll just go there for the day and hang out.

[Tig Notaro]

Let's just go get a hotel room, watch a movie and order room service.

[Meg Stalter]

Okay, I'm doing that.

[Tig Notaro]

It was so fun.

[Meg Stalter]

That's fun. That's really fun.

[Tig Notaro]

It's so fun.

[Fortune Feimster]

I've had the room for the. Just the. I've rented it for the night, but we just used it during the day and used the spa, like the steam room and that stuff. And then used it for the room for other things. For. What was that? Other things, such as. And then left. Didn't stay the night.

[Tig Notaro]

Have you ever. In a hotel room? Yeah, I realized this a couple of nights ago when I was in Chicago. I see these all the time in the hotel room. Never used one.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Have you ever used a shower cap?

[Fortune Feimster]

I sure have not.

[Meg Stalter]

Well, now I bet you something I really want to see, which is all of us in shower caps. Like our. Like bonnets. Like little bonnets.

[Tig Notaro]

I forgot about our bonnets.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, someone gave us those in Toronto.

[Meg Stalter]

I don't think I've used one. Except when you're getting your hair dyed. Sometimes they put like a plastic bag.

[Tig Notaro]

But like, to get into the shower. Who the hell. Like, they are in every hotel room.

[Brandi Carlisle]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

There must be enough people that don't want to get their hair wet that this is still in demand.

[Tig Notaro]

Well, I'm going to start asking around because.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah, do.

[Fortune Feimster]

Let's ask our listeners. Do any of you wear. Wear shower caps? Please let us know in our social media comments.

[Tig Notaro]

This is the last hotel thing I'll say.

[Fortune Feimster]

Okay, give it to us.

[Tig Notaro]

Do you notice that hair dryers are mysteriously hard to find in. It's like, where is it? Is it in the drawer?

[Fortune Feimster]

Always.

[Meg Stalter]

Is it in the this better be your new hour.

[Fortune Feimster]

It's called Where Is It?

[Meg Stalter]

Observational.

[Tig Notaro]

Call me about my new special where is It?

[Announcer]

Checking Allstate first could save you hundreds on car insurance. That's smart. Not checking that I've got some paint and a canvas when I'm headed to the wilderness. Major regret. I'm overdue for another animal painting, but without art supplies, I just can't express myself.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, checking first is smart, so check

[Sponsor Voice]

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[Announcer]

Want some more things to do? How about whale watching, dune tours and countless art galleries? P Town is the birthplace of modern American theater and there are so many

[Meg Stalter]

shows to catch as well.

[Announcer]

I've got to perform there one day. From Boston, you hop on a fast ferry for 90 minutes. The ferries run from mid May through mid October, so book your trip now. For more Info go to ptowntourism.com the Official Guide to Provincetown. That's P towntourism.com I love my cats

[Sponsor Voice]

and if you listen to the podcast, you know I would do anything for them. A quick message from today's sponsor, the ASPCA Pet Health Insurance Program. Life with a pet is full of surprises. A chewed up sock. A spur of the moment adventure. An unexpected vet bill. That's why ASPCA Pet Health Insurance is worth checking out. Their plans are flexible, easy to customize, and help you stay prepared for whatever your dog or cat gets into. The best part? There's a special perk for signing up

[Announcer]

when you enroll in an ASPCA Pet Health Insurance plan. You could get a $25Amazon gift card.

[Meg Stalter]

It's a little treat for you while

[Announcer]

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[Meg Stalter]

You're right. There's no kind of standard. It's always under the sink. No, sometimes it's in a little bag

[Tig Notaro]

hanging on the door.

[Fortune Feimster]

I do like it when hotels have switched from ironing boards and irons to the little hand steamers. Not me. You prefer the iron.

[Tig Notaro]

You like an iron one.

[Fortune Feimster]

Wait, what are you.

[Meg Stalter]

Steamer.

[Fortune Feimster]

You're a steamer, too.

[Tig Notaro]

And you know, Ricky Lindholm, she has a really funny bit that I'm like, God, I wish I thought. I mean, it's so funny. Just that, like, how long have ironing boards been around and they can't fix it to where it doesn't go, like, when you open it? I mean, truly, how is that the case?

[Fortune Feimster]

Well, the steamers do get dangerous. I, you know, sometimes have dum dum moments, not thinking.

[Tig Notaro]

And I have not our fortune. Don't talk about my friend like that.

[Fortune Feimster]

I have been like, oh, I missed this spot and did the steamer. And it just burnt your cooter. My cooter burnt my cooter.

[Tig Notaro]

Why are you always drying your crush?

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah, why are you steaming your cooter?

[Tig Notaro]

I don't know.

[Fortune Feimster]

Steamy crush. There's like a wet spot.

[Announcer]

Not.

[Fortune Feimster]

Not what you're. Don't get your head out of the gutter. And then I tried to steam it out and just burnt my cooter.

[Tig Notaro]

Crispy fried cooter.

[Meg Stalter]

Fried cooter.

[Fortune Feimster]

So those things do get very hot, but I do prefer them to. The iron is. It's a whole thing.

[Tig Notaro]

Have you ever ironed your coot?

[Fortune Feimster]

No.

[Tig Notaro]

Give it a whirl.

[Fortune Feimster]

That sounds painful.

[Meg Stalter]

I feel like vagazzle used to be the butt of every joke. And stand up and that was the thing. People were putting, like, gems on there and maybe, like, to iron them on,

[Fortune Feimster]

you know, like, Swarovski crystals or whatever.

[Meg Stalter]

No, but it kind of went away.

[Fortune Feimster]

You know what I'm talking about. Night girl. Girl.

[Tig Notaro]

I don't.

[Fortune Feimster]

It's like the little crystal, like, your name or something.

[May Martin]

Tig.

[Tig Notaro]

People put that on their crotch.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

That was a Thing at one point.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

I don't know if it's still a thing now. Wouldn't it fun to have Tig. Tig's name down there, though it's small,

[Meg Stalter]

so it fit on Tig or on us, I guess.

[Fortune Feimster]

I think it should be.

[Tig Notaro]

I wonder if I understand what's happening right now.

[Meg Stalter]

It's like you glue gems to your pubic area.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah. Like, it's.

[Tig Notaro]

So you have no hair there. You, like, rip the hair out. Or have you seen one on your.

[Meg Stalter]

You don't rip it out.

[Fortune Feimster]

I've never seen one in person. Have you?

[Meg Stalter]

No, never.

[Fortune Feimster]

Cooter, let's not get crazy here. I'm talking about. Yeah. The Vagazzle.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah. It just used to be.

[Tig Notaro]

Never heard of this.

[Meg Stalter]

Are we canceling it out?

[Fortune Feimster]

I wasn't showing you a picture of mine.

[May Martin]

Just.

[Fortune Feimster]

Here, let me get out my PowerPoint presentation.

[Tig Notaro]

You need to iron that thing.

[Meg Stalter]

How can they have shower caps in every room and then not toothpaste in every room? I hate having to call down.

[Fortune Feimster]

They never have toothpaste.

[Tig Notaro]

And they hate that you're not bringing your own toothpaste.

[Fortune Feimster]

That would be expensive for them to.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah, that checks. Yeah, that's true.

[Tig Notaro]

But sometimes they'll supply those tiny, tiny off brand where it just says mint paste.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah, mint paste.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

All the Q tips you could want.

[Meg Stalter]

I love a Q tip. I know you're not supposed to, but

[Fortune Feimster]

I love them, too.

[Meg Stalter]

Do you.

[Fortune Feimster]

I want to buy that thing on Amazon that, like, pushes the water in your ear.

[Tig Notaro]

Don't you want water pushed into your ear?

[Fortune Feimster]

I don't think that's bad. Is it?

[Meg Stalter]

I. I've been the victim of. I have all these gadgets. Like, I have bought every gadget we know.

[Fortune Feimster]

Your Amazon wish list is.

[Meg Stalter]

I'm not going to use Amazon. I'm turning a corner. I'm like, oh, this is one thing I can do is boycott. Boycott Amazon as much as possible.

[Tig Notaro]

Okay, I am boycotting Amazon.

[Fortune Feimster]

I need a synthesizer.

[Meg Stalter]

No, I have a bit of boycotting hot dogs and Target. And I'm trying, I'm trying, but. Well, do we have. Is now the time, Thomas?

[Fortune Feimster]

Should I. Oh, wait, What? Well, what's happening?

[Meg Stalter]

So we're talking about gadgets. You're talking about this.

[Tig Notaro]

You're pregnant.

[Meg Stalter]

I am with child. No. So I don't know if you noticed, like, a different piece of furniture in here that might. Yeah, yeah. This round footstool.

[Fortune Feimster]

Okay.

[Announcer]

Yeah.

[Meg Stalter]

But it's not actually a footstool, guys.

[Fortune Feimster]

What is it?

[Meg Stalter]

It's one of my new gadgets.

[Fortune Feimster]

This is a gadget, y'.

[May Martin]

All.

[Tig Notaro]

We didn't know anything about this, Thomas.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh.

[May Martin]

Oh, my God.

[Fortune Feimster]

That is hilarious. We want. It's like an alien maze.

[Tig Notaro]

Ass is on camera.

[May Martin]

But is it.

[Fortune Feimster]

Is it a part time stool?

[Announcer]

Part time stool? Full time massager?

[Meg Stalter]

Whatever you want.

[Announcer]

So.

[Meg Stalter]

Okay.

[Fortune Feimster]

Tigs, Tigs, Tig Kicking off her shoes.

[Tig Notaro]

Do I have to take my socks onto me?

[Fortune Feimster]

I think you should leave your socks on for hygiene purposes.

[Tig Notaro]

You think I'm not clean?

[Fortune Feimster]

No, I'm sure you are.

[Meg Stalter]

It's pretty neat.

[Tig Notaro]

I'm a germaphobe.

[Announcer]

I want to see. Whatever.

[Tig Notaro]

Ow.

[Meg Stalter]

Really?

[Tig Notaro]

Are you serious?

[Sponsor Voice]

Yes.

[Meg Stalter]

I have it on the strongest. I'll put it on the.

[Announcer]

I'll put it down.

[Fortune Feimster]

Wait.

[Tig Notaro]

No, no, no.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Wait, wait. Are you. Are you wanting this torture? Do you want me to fix it?

[Tig Notaro]

Have you tried this?

[Meg Stalter]

Tommy, I don't like your feet. You don't like that?

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, my God.

[Meg Stalter]

This is hell. This is hell.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, my God.

[Tig Notaro]

Have you done this?

[Meg Stalter]

I'm loving it.

[Fortune Feimster]

Wait, is it on the highest thing?

[Tig Notaro]

No, it's on the lowest.

[Meg Stalter]

Now.

[Tig Notaro]

I don't know.

[Fortune Feimster]

I'm asking. I think a little.

[Tig Notaro]

Now it's vibrating.

[Meg Stalter]

It'll go through a cycle of different things. So it's like. This is hell. Is. It's pretty intense, right?

[Tig Notaro]

Well, yeah.

[Meg Stalter]

Squeezes, rolls, heats up. That's the lowest.

[Tig Notaro]

Feels like a rodent is nibbling on my palm.

[Fortune Feimster]

How did you land on this? You were.

[Tig Notaro]

You were scrolling through your Amazon Bear. No, they look me in the eye.

[Fortune Feimster]

Where did it come.

[Meg Stalter]

No, it actually is called Chill Chair. It's a private company. It was advertised to me and I said, yeah, okay, okay. Always trying to relax.

[Tig Notaro]

Advertise to you.

[Fortune Feimster]

And you love this.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, on social media, yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

And you love this.

[Meg Stalter]

I'm. Well, I'm kind of on the fence. I can't decide if it's good or bad for me, but it does heat up. It's warm.

[Tig Notaro]

Okay.

[Fortune Feimster]

So funny.

[Meg Stalter]

And I just wanted to give you guys a glimpse into what my evenings are like. Like, my evenings are. I got that on. I got sometimes, like, a vibrating face.

[Fortune Feimster]

Wow. You like a vibration and.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Invisible mascara.

[Meg Stalter]

Invisible mascara. And then I have, like, an ab workout machine that I've got this mascara

[Fortune Feimster]

shake shirt vibrating your entire body.

[Meg Stalter]

No, I'm going like this. Doing crunches. So I'm watching tv and I'm like,

[Tig Notaro]

what is your goal? What are we.

[Meg Stalter]

What is this all to maximize my time.

[Fortune Feimster]

Your time of Rest needs to vibrations.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah, I'll take whatever help I can get.

[Fortune Feimster]

Is it starting to become comfortable?

[Tig Notaro]

It's. You're very tense.

[Fortune Feimster]

You're very. Your whole body is. Yeah. Release.

[Meg Stalter]

So tense. Oh, I can see you kind of.

[Tig Notaro]

I can. I'm. My feet are relaxed right now.

[Fortune Feimster]

If you had titties, this would be real fun.

[Tig Notaro]

No, I have dumpster titties. And we all know this, but I

[Fortune Feimster]

really enjoy this vibe vibration. If you had some tigo bitties.

[Meg Stalter]

Fortune. Are you. Are you keen to get in there?

[Fortune Feimster]

Why not?

[Tig Notaro]

Well, it's settled down now. No, no, no. Put your little hooves back on.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, now take. Doesn't want to share.

[Tig Notaro]

Well, cuz now it settled down and it just feels good now.

[Meg Stalter]

You like it?

[Tig Notaro]

Okay, I need to get an ab machine.

[Fortune Feimster]

Well, now I'm just here with one shoe on and one shoe off.

[Meg Stalter]

I'm not sponsored by this, but my

[Tig Notaro]

shoe looks like you have it on, doesn't it?

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah, sure does.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

Well, I guess I'll just sit here like this with one shoe on, one shoe off me.

[Meg Stalter]

Do you jinx? You both said fine by me at the same time.

[Tig Notaro]

I still do that near daily.

[Meg Stalter]

So I was looking into the lyrics of that song, like to see if I could memorize them. And it's actually kind of problematic.

[Fortune Feimster]

And then.

[Meg Stalter]

And it's all about like how he wants to date Asian women and like, really well, there's all these. All these weird things in it. And then my. I was saying that to my friend. I was like, can you believe that innocent song? Actually, if you slow it down. And she's like, well, the band's called Barenaked Ladies. Like, what do you expect? And I was like, oh, yeah, yeah,

[Fortune Feimster]

I guess that's a good point. Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

They just seem right under our noses.

[Fortune Feimster]

They just seem fun because they sing. If I had a million dollars, it's been.

[Tig Notaro]

Okay, this is what I'm talking. Oh, oh. It's back to the abusive side. I gotta stop.

[Fortune Feimster]

Stop. All right. Oh.

[Tig Notaro]

Alison Janney broke my ribs. May Martin broke my toes.

[Fortune Feimster]

I'm taking my shoes off. I'm getting ready for whatever this ride. Is it gonna fit my big feet? Yeah, of course.

[Meg Stalter]

One size fits.

[Fortune Feimster]

What size are you? Big. Like what?

[Meg Stalter]

No, I got pretty big feet.

[Tig Notaro]

Big, medium and large.

[Meg Stalter]

I mean small.

[Announcer]

Seven men's.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, I'm nine and a half.

[May Martin]

Men's.

[Gareth Reynolds]

Whoa.

[Tig Notaro]

That's right, May.

[Fortune Feimster]

Okay. I'm just a petty little lady.

[Tig Notaro]

Is it hurting?

[Fortune Feimster]

It's tight. Oh, smashes.

[Tig Notaro]

I told you. Smashes.

[Fortune Feimster]

Your Feet.

[Tig Notaro]

No, I told you no.

[Fortune Feimster]

No.

[Tig Notaro]

I want to go through the pain.

[Fortune Feimster]

I want to go through the cycle. Girl, did I not tell you that

[Tig Notaro]

we need to have a slumber party?

[Meg Stalter]

Oh my God.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh my God.

[Fortune Feimster]

It just smashes the front part quite a lot. In the beginning, do you remember when

[Tig Notaro]

I yelled this is hell?

[Fortune Feimster]

Uh huh.

[Tig Notaro]

Does that make sense?

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Okay. Now I'm like have size 10 men's.

[Fortune Feimster]

But now it's calming down and there's some comfort here.

[Meg Stalter]

Like, would you ever have this on set or something? In your.

[Tig Notaro]

In my spacesuit.

[Meg Stalter]

Your space suit?

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah, I think you.

[Tig Notaro]

It looks pretty spacey.

[Fortune Feimster]

Maybe you have to. Why am I jiggling more than you were jiggling?

[Tig Notaro]

You got titties.

[Fortune Feimster]

Isn't that the best word? Tits and titties. I love it. And cooter milkers, because there's. There's moments of this that are very relaxing.

[Meg Stalter]

And then it'll surprise you with the sharp pain and then it be.

[Tig Notaro]

It's like a bad relationship.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah, yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

I was talking about with the bad boys.

[Tig Notaro]

This should be called the bad boy

[Fortune Feimster]

because he, he's real nice to you and takes you on a date and then he doesn't come home one night and you're like.

[Meg Stalter]

When it's good, it's good when it

[Fortune Feimster]

sounded like a pooted. You know that like.

[Meg Stalter]

I've never heard pooted. You've never heard pooting? No, I've heard tooted.

[Fortune Feimster]

Well, it's a poot. Because it's that. It's that like.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah, yeah, that sound.

[Tig Notaro]

I think that you're the only person alive that has made that sound.

[Fortune Feimster]

That's big.

[Tig Notaro]

That's like at the end of the day.

[Fortune Feimster]

That's a poot.

[Meg Stalter]

I've probably said this, but I dated this woman who would. In the morning. I always noticed that she was like lying on me and then her hands would kind of go behind her and then. And then sometimes I'd hear like. And then I realized.

[Fortune Feimster]

Was she taking her butt cheeks apart?

[Meg Stalter]

She was in the morning.

[Tig Notaro]

What are we every morning talking about?

[Meg Stalter]

She didn't want to make a fart sound or wake me up.

[Tig Notaro]

But she wanted you to talk about it on a podcast in a few years.

[Meg Stalter]

She was sneakily just pulling her own butt cheeks apart.

[Fortune Feimster]

That's a poop.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah, that's a poop. That's a poop. I'd never even thought of that method.

[Fortune Feimster]

I can't believe she was laying on you and spread her butt cheeks.

[Announcer]

I know.

[Tig Notaro]

Fortune knew right away when she spread

[Fortune Feimster]

well, how else would you reach your hands back there?

[Meg Stalter]

But what I said to her was

[Tig Notaro]

like, I reached my hands. I told you.

[Announcer]

Oh, it's.

[Meg Stalter]

That's the bad boys using your little. Your footsies.

[Fortune Feimster]

She's yelling at me right now.

[Meg Stalter]

I told her I'd be kind of more into it if she'd just do the fart and get the comedy.

[Fortune Feimster]

We all talked about it.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah, we talked about it.

[Tig Notaro]

Did you say, pardon me, but did you just spread your cheeks?

[Meg Stalter]

Yes.

[Tig Notaro]

Did she really?

[Meg Stalter]

She was mortified.

[Fortune Feimster]

I don't know if I had the courage to bring that up.

[Tig Notaro]

That is a courageous thing you did, Meg.

[Fortune Feimster]

Really?

[Tig Notaro]

No. I don't know if courage is the word I would use.

[Meg Stalter]

I said I'd be more into it if you were confident enough to just. And so that's what started happening then after I said that, then every morning.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, she let it rip.

[Meg Stalter]

I would feel her body tense and I'd start laughing right away.

[Tig Notaro]

That was the start of the day. Whistle is what she was doing.

[Fortune Feimster]

And she always woke up on top of you.

[Meg Stalter]

She would lie. Always sleep the whole night on my chest like that.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah, the whole night.

[Tig Notaro]

I know why.

[Meg Stalter]

She's actually the best. Sleeps.

[Fortune Feimster]

Really. I would. That I would get hot.

[Meg Stalter]

But isn't that weird that I was kind of turned on by the fact that she was confident enough to just fart on me? I don't have a fart fetish.

[Fortune Feimster]

You have.

[Tig Notaro]

Sounds like you do something.

[Meg Stalter]

I don't.

[Fortune Feimster]

I swear.

[Tig Notaro]

I have news.

[Fortune Feimster]

You do. You don't not have one. How about that?

[Meg Stalter]

I have a fetish for people who are confident enough to use a fart as a punchline.

[Announcer]

Well, I go, you must.

[Meg Stalter]

You know, I like you a lot.

[Tig Notaro]

I told you about my friend's mother who would make eye contact.

[Meg Stalter]

Oh, yeah. Iconic.

[Tig Notaro]

And she would just be like, are you going to stay for dinner?

[Fortune Feimster]

Excuse me.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, my God.

[Fortune Feimster]

I don't want that.

[Meg Stalter]

But she wasn't doing it as a joke. She just couldn't control it.

[Tig Notaro]

She was like a drill sergeant. Slash running or what is it? Like a linebacker.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

You know, I think I wanted to

[Fortune Feimster]

get off my feet.

[Meg Stalter]

You want us to stop?

[Fortune Feimster]

But I liked it.

[Meg Stalter]

Thanks.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah, I appreciate this experience.

[Meg Stalter]

I feel like I'm on Shark Tank.

[Tig Notaro]

Thomas, just help me now. You want to try it?

[Fortune Feimster]

And then we should get to our questions.

[Meg Stalter]

Oh, yeah, we have.

[Fortune Feimster]

As much as I would love to talk about tooting. Thomas, help.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, my gosh.

[Fortune Feimster]

Was this on the list at any point?

[Tig Notaro]

No, but we can mark it off when is our slumber party.

[Meg Stalter]

Oh, my God. Say the word.

[Fortune Feimster]

Doesn't it feel like we're at one now?

[Tig Notaro]

I mean. Wait, are you doing that with your legs or is it doing that?

[Announcer]

No, it's doing that for me.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, my gosh. Does it not hurt?

[Meg Stalter]

It's doing the squeezing thing.

[Fortune Feimster]

Now we're all just shoeless.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, but you're a tough guy.

[Fortune Feimster]

I guess this feels like a slumber party.

[Announcer]

Maybe you guys were at the wrong angle.

[Tig Notaro]

Don't blame this on us.

[Fortune Feimster]

All right, we're gonna get to our question. You continue doing what you want, and Tig's gonna tell us who our question asker is.

[Meg Stalter]

It's too distracting. I can't do this. But it's good.

[Fortune Feimster]

Okay, this is very exciting because this our question asker today. Just saying. America the Beautiful at the super bowl not too long ago.

[Tig Notaro]

Kid Rock.

[Fortune Feimster]

Can you imagine if we had him on?

[Announcer]

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[Meg Stalter]

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[May Martin]

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[Tig Notaro]

The all new Bombas sport socks are engineered with sport specific comfort for running, golf, hiking, skiing, snowboarding and all sport. This year, I'm continuing to walk around the clock whenever I get time to go outside and tour my neighborhood. And Bombas make the perfect sock. They're cushioned where I need it too. And around the house I wear Bomba's luxurious Sherpa Sunday slippers that feel like walking on clouds, underwear and teas. Bombas has you covered there too.

[May Martin]

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[Announcer]

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[Fortune Feimster]

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[Meg Stalter]

Quince has the everyday essentials that I

[Announcer]

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[Meg Stalter]

white T shirts that I can pair with anything.

[Announcer]

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[May Martin]

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[Announcer]

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[Meg Stalter]

Quince.com handsome okay, today's question asker is

[Fortune Feimster]

a highly celebrated singer, songwriter, producer and activist who has won 11 Grammy Awards and two Emmy Awards. She co wrote and performed the original

[May Martin]

song Salt Then Sour Then Sweet for

[Fortune Feimster]

the Oscar nominated documentary Come See Me in the Good Light.

[May Martin]

Huh?

[Meg Stalter]

Heard of it?

[Fortune Feimster]

That's right. Brandi Carlisle is asking today's question.

[Brandi Carlisle]

Hey handsome Pod, it's Brandi Carlisle.

[Fortune Feimster]

Hi Brandi.

[Brandi Carlisle]

So I have a question for you because I've been hearing a lot about this lately and I've been really wondering how this lands on queer people. How do you feel when you hear the word Jesus? What does it make you feel like when you hear that name? Do you feel like, triggered or curious? Inspired? Concerned? Distrustful? How does the word Jesus make you feel in these times that we're living through?

[Fortune Feimster]

Look at Brandy all dressed up. Do you think this was right after the Super Bowl?

[Tig Notaro]

No.

[Meg Stalter]

Like, she ran off stage, put a tie on.

[Fortune Feimster]

I must go fill my handsome question.

[Tig Notaro]

She looks very handsome.

[Fortune Feimster]

She looks very handsome. Brandy knows how to rock a suit.

[Tig Notaro]

Brandy knows how to rock it.

[Fortune Feimster]

Brandy does anything. Indeed. She's super talented.

[Meg Stalter]

I feel like I've had a different as, like, Canadian, very atheist family. Like, I've had a different experience than growing up in a smaller town in America. It must have more weight for you. But I feel lucky that I. I like Jesus. I, I. And I was taught about religion like, that. Like, that they were all different sides of the same coin with really nice stories. And I got really into Jesus as a guy, but so it doesn't have that. I don't feel triggered, like, because it hasn't been used against me directly or I haven't had to, like, debate it with people. Like, I've just sort of avoided all that. Do you guys have more weight?

[Fortune Feimster]

Well, because. Do you guys.

[Tig Notaro]

Does Canada have the, like, born again?

[Fortune Feimster]

Well, the heart, like, the religious. Yes, for sure. That we have.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah. But not to the same degree, I think. Yeah. Like our. Yeah, I think.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah.

[Meg Stalter]

Less so. There's definitely the religious sex of it. Yes.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

You know what? I was gonna say it. This is so such a minor little moment in her question, but it's something that I hadn't put my finger on until this moment, hearing her say it when she said, the times that we're living through feels very different than the times we're living in.

[Meg Stalter]

Oh, you're right.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. And I just wonder if that was a conscious choice, because I hear people say, these times we're living through, and it's just. I was like, wow, that's so. Like, I hear. I hear people say that and yet feels very. Because times that you're living in feels more positive and.

[Meg Stalter]

Oh, that's what I. I almost felt the opposite. Like, living through is like, we're gonna get out.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah, that's. That's what I kind of would assume too.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah. Whereas living in this isn't permanent in it.

[Tig Notaro]

Interesting.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Because.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. I changed my mind just then when you suggested that.

[Fortune Feimster]

Right. If you go through something. Yeah. You're getting to the other side of

[Meg Stalter]

it, but I know what you mean. That it sounds almost like, endure.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[Meg Stalter]

These times we're enduring.

[Fortune Feimster]

But.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. Anyway, I know that wasn't the main point of it, but it was still an interesting, like.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Got me thinking. I was raised Catholic, but I was not raised in a house where God and Jesus were really mentioned. We went to college. To college. Didn't do that either. Went to church until like, through elementary school. And then it was kind of like the jig is up. Nobody. My brother and I were like, we're not into this. And yeah. There wasn't like a Bible in our house, I don't think. And I never saw one.

[Meg Stalter]

I think it depending on how you learn about him. Like, he. Jesus as a figure is so rebellious. He was so critical of religious leaders who were hypocritical. Like, he. Like, everything about him is great. Supportive women, like, you know, friends with sex workers and stuff. Like, he was such a badass. So I'm lucky I was taught about him as a figure. In the same way you'd learn stories about Siddhartha or something.

[Fortune Feimster]

You were learned about him as a chill guy. Yeah. But then a lot of people rebel. Take it, you know, to that more, you know, Helen Brimstone type of situation with like.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

Punishment of not living on the right righteous path, you know.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

That feels like a more recent

[Fortune Feimster]

shift.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. That I'm learning about or meeting people or realizing I know people that have now flipped over into that world where it doesn't feel like a part of my upbringing.

[Meg Stalter]

It's like the irony of Jesus being used as this means of, like, discrimination and control and, you know, been used

[Fortune Feimster]

to start wars from, of course, forever.

[Meg Stalter]

I know.

[Fortune Feimster]

Because. Yeah. It is a form of control.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

I mean, I think it depends on people's relationship with. With the church or Jesus as to how they feel about their interpretation. Yeah. So, like, you know, if you were to meet someone who came from, like, say, like a Mormon background or whatever, like, and they're. Say they're gay, like, you know, they're not welcomed in that church anymore. And they, you know, could potentially. And I'm just using that as a broad example, but, you know, not accepted by family members anymore. Then your relationship to Jesus might be a negative one because.

[Tig Notaro]

Totally.

[Fortune Feimster]

And suddenly you feel like you're not accepted anymore. I mean, being from the south, like, in the small town that I grew up in, you know, there's a church everywhere. It's such a part of the culture, such a part of, like, the social aspect of the South. Like, you, like, go to church functions, people at church check on you. Like, there's really great things about it where it's like a fabric of society there, where it's. That's. I can see, like, there's community.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

Many positive things like that. My mom still is very much involved in the United Methodist Church. So in that regard, I. I am always. I'm like. I will even say to my mom, are you going to church? Like, because it's such a positive thing for her. And I'll go with her, you know, a couple times a year. But I. As I got older, my. I mean, as someone who grew up. Up going to church every Sunday, as I got older, I decided that wasn't for me anymore.

[Announcer]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

But I've kept my relationship to be still open to the concept of Jesus and God and. And I. I have not like, shunned that. I still see value in that and like a belief system and a morality type of way. I think I. I treat it in the.

[Announcer]

The.

[Fortune Feimster]

Like treat others as you want to be treated. The basics of.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

Of it. The. Like, you know, try to be a good person. Those things.

[Meg Stalter]

It seems so universal that we try to answer these questions and are reaching for something and then we. Yeah. These are meant to be like moral signposts that help us navigate things instead of like literal doc, you know.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah.

[Meg Stalter]

And doctrine and Definitely.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah.

[Meg Stalter]

Not like organized to benefit. I mean, in. Given in light of everything, I'm. I'm really feeling like. Well, that's not even. But I feel insane these days.

[Fortune Feimster]

Well, when it's used as a weapon to be like, you're okay and you're not. Well. So like, that's where it becomes an issue where. Because then it's being used as like, well, we have decided we're okay, but you're not. Well, who decided that and why?

[Meg Stalter]

Like, you know, I just am like, where do we go from here? We've always kind of known, like, the people who are most outspokenly anti gay and fire and brimstone. You read the headlines and they're arrested six months later for sex crimes. Right. Like this.

[Fortune Feimster]

Not everyone. But that does happen.

[Meg Stalter]

It happens a lot.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah.

[Meg Stalter]

And then now it's like I just watched this amazing movie about sex work and stuff. And I was thinking after. Like we've been for centuries. It's like this is perversion and things. And then now we're seeing like the true perversion at the top. Like the. I mean, it's like too much to fathom. So it's like now that we. The hypocrisy is like, laid out. Where do we go from here? What's gonna happen? Is anything gonna happen? Is anyone gonna get arrested?

[Fortune Feimster]

Are you talking about the Epstein files? Yeah.

[Meg Stalter]

That's all I think about. It's all I talk about. We can't even. Cause it's just too fucking insane.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. We have to save that for our Epstein Fil episode. I remember when I was living in Austin. I mean, it was so long ago, like 35 years ago. Like, so long ago. You were barely alive. It's insane. But my friend and I live next door to this very Christian family, and they worked at the church. They had three kids, and we became really close with them.

[Sponsor Voice]

And they were.

[Tig Notaro]

I would say, the first. I was in my early 20s, but they were. Aside from my family members that are religious and different people here or there. These were Christians that led with Christianity, like Jesus.

[Meg Stalter]

Actual teachings of like.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. And they talk about it and they. It wasn't just like something they did quietly.

[Meg Stalter]

Okay.

[Tig Notaro]

But I loved them so much, and they knew that we were gay and their kids would come over, like, two years old to, like, seven years old and just, like, knock on our door and want to come hang out in our kitchen while we were home just relaxing and whatever. And I just. I never got any weird vibe from them. Other. Not even. Other than. I just never got any weird vibe. And I was. I was just. I just loved them and I loved what they represented, and I was good with them talking about Jesus because there was just nothing seemingly off.

[Sponsor Voice]

And then.

[Tig Notaro]

No, there's no.

[Fortune Feimster]

Okay.

[Meg Stalter]

Okay.

[Tig Notaro]

I was just thinking. I also. My first girlfriend's parents, maybe. I don't know if I've shared this with you, but I'm very close with them.

[Meg Stalter]

Oh, yeah? Yeah. And you went to see the Pope and then.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. And I brought a rosary home for them. And they're like parents to me in a way. And they're Catholic and they very much lead with that. But unbelievable examples of loving, open. They have different views, but, I mean, Stephanie and I, they live in small town Ohio, Farmville. And we will go in the summertime and I'll bring my wife and children out and stay with them in their house, in their little home. I love them so, so deeply.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah. I mean, yeah. I'm definitely not saying all Christian people are probably talking about.

[Tig Notaro]

No, I didn't take it that way at all. I'm just saying, like, those in your experience. In my experience, the people that, like, really are leading with it and talking about it, and it's not like all the time talking about it, but it's kind of like me being vegan. It's like, you're gonna know I'm vegan. But I just really appreciate their relationship with God or Jesus and their church. And they're actually out in the world doing good. That's great. And really hands on in the community. And

[Meg Stalter]

they're not a monolith. Yeah. Like religious people. It's just. Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

I think when I hear Jesus, my point is like, I'm open.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Who's behind that?

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah. I'm not sure. I, I'm, I'm, I'm a big Jesus fan.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

I'm not triggered by that at all. I think it also boils down to how you treat each other as far as, like, I know so many religious people and I, I have great respect for, you know, people that I've met where religion is their entire life. If they're accepting of me and they're not kind to me, I give them that same respect in return of, like, good, great. You know, it's amazing that you have these beliefs and you're.

[Meg Stalter]

This.

[Fortune Feimster]

That's a big part of your life. Doesn't bother me at all. It's when someone is. When someone's like, you're going to hell based on what the.

[Meg Stalter]

It's a weird barrier to intimacy. Even if they're like, hey, I love you. You know, I have deep empathy for you, hope God saves your soul. But, you know, I believe you're going to hell, but that, like I said, then that's hard. How do you. Where do you.

[Tig Notaro]

It's like, that's where they need to keep that to themselves.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah. It's like, if you think I'm going

[Tig Notaro]

to hell, just pipe down and let's have a nice dinner.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah.

[Meg Stalter]

I mean, like, we were talking about the, the, about magic and intention and stuff. And I, I definitely think prayer could be powerful. And I'm like, yeah, I'm loving it. Like, Meg Stalter is Christian and is being outspoken. I think she organized a prayer group of people to like, I'm into that kind of thing where. Yeah. Where it's actually living Jesus's teachings.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah. And I mean, when I go into, you know, I, I poke fun with my mom when I go to church, like on Christmas Eve with her, I'm like, oh, I hope I'm, you know, allowed in here or whatever. It's. I've always been welcomed in there in this particular church. And, you know, there's something really beautiful about these, these, some of these old churches when I'm in Europe, I love walking into these church churches. You can feel this, you know, energy, this. It's very hopeful. I think that's what I look towards. Religion. The, the positive part of the religion and, and believing In God or Jesus or whoever is. Is feeling hopeful. I, like, I'm. I'm talking to someone. Be it whatever your belief, the universe, God of, like, you know, asking for help or.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah, yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

You know, looking over for people. Like, when people are like, I'm praying for your mom, that means something to me, you know?

[Meg Stalter]

But it's crazy. Like, oh, sorry. No, the way she's said it, like, in these times we're living through, it's like, it. America specifically, it seems like it's just been manipulated for nefarious purposes. So you do have, like, quite, like. We're lucky we don't encounter the hate every day in our lives and stuff, but it is, like, an increasingly super powerful religious right. That was really scary.

[Fortune Feimster]

I definitely don't like when it gets intermingled with, like, government, you know, I don't. I do very much firmly believe in the separation of church and state.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah, totally.

[Fortune Feimster]

I don't like when those two co. Mingle.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. I, I, I was gonna say, like, when I go to Mississippi and my family, they're all churchgoers, but their vibe is, you know, like, I, Stephanie and I got married in Mississippi in the small town at my cousin's house. And their whole vibe down there is like, all right, we're gonna get up, we're gonna go to church, and then after that, let's go. Let's go out to the yacht club and let's ha. And then, you know, and it's just like, get up, go run five miles, go to church, do this and that, and then, you know, ask God for a beautiful day. And that's kind of just the vibe I feel like that I grew up in.

[Meg Stalter]

That's nice.

[Tig Notaro]

That doesn't feel. And even my other cousin, he was a part of the Catholic Church, and he officiated our wedding, and he got kicked out of the church knowing he likely would. But he said it was worth it because he said that they got it wrong, you know, so, anyway.

[Fortune Feimster]

Well, I'd be curious to hear Brandi's answer. I know she has a background with church. She's talked about it in her book. And then.

[Tig Notaro]

Let's hear it.

[Brandi Carlisle]

I'm curious because when I wrote my book, I wrote a lot about being raised within the faith and religious and coming up in church and all of the problems that I had being out of the closet and, you know, issues with hell, trauma, and acceptance. And then I also wrote about the parts of the faith that really still work for me and about the way I personally feel about Jesus. And I was totally overwhelmed by the amount of LGBTQ people that came to me and said they want to talk about this more and more, that there are still parts of this. Of the Christian faith and their childhood religion that are with them, whether they like it or not, in good ways and in horrible ways. And I think it's a really interesting conversation to have, especially at this point in life where, you know, we're safe and we aren't subject to the church anymore in the way that maybe we were when we were young, but that there are parts of the teachings of Jesus that I think still live in so many queer people in. In such a complicated way that I'm fascinated by the conversation. And thank you for your answers.

[Tig Notaro]

Thank you.

[Fortune Feimster]

I think it just comes down to wanting to be accepted. Right. I mean, just wanting to feel like

[Tig Notaro]

you're welcome and safe.

[Fortune Feimster]

And safe. Yeah.

[Meg Stalter]

And wanting to be safe, because that's the thing. It's like. Like with all those abortion bans and stuff, it's like, are we safe? I don't know. So I don't know. We gotta be vigilant about that, because, like, you're saying, the separation of church and state is so crucial.

[Fortune Feimster]

The line is getting more and more blur.

[Announcer]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, for sure.

[Meg Stalter]

I feel like I want to sit and have a glass of wine.

[Tig Notaro]

I'm very curious. Yeah. I'm curious how Brandy and her wife, you know, they have their little family unit.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah.

[Meg Stalter]

And.

[Tig Notaro]

And they've got their kids.

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

And what. What part does religion play Right. Within the dynamic of their family?

[Meg Stalter]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Well, I guess we'll never know.

[Fortune Feimster]

We'll never know.

[Tig Notaro]

So never know.

[Meg Stalter]

You know Jesus had siblings. I didn't know that, but imagine.

[Fortune Feimster]

Well, that's for another. In the meantime. What? A podcast.

[Tig Notaro]

What?

[Meg Stalter]

A podcast.

[Tig Notaro]

Gosh darn podcast.

[Announcer]

Foot massage.

[Tig Notaro]

We got massages, May.

[Fortune Feimster]

That's right.

[Meg Stalter]

Subjected you to this.

[Tig Notaro]

Separated their cheeks.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah. We're all on tour. Go see us on tour.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, go see us on tour. Take notaro.com.

[Meg Stalter]

i leave in two days, I guess.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yes. Go check out May on this bus tour.

[Tig Notaro]

You need to pack.

[Meg Stalter]

Yes.

[Fortune Feimster]

San Diego soon.

[Tig Notaro]

Also, if you haven't seen Come See Me in the Good Light, you should watch it. Apple tv. If you don't have Apple, you can get a free subscription. Sign up for a month, watch the movie, and then do whatever you want to do after that. Also, Starfleet Academy with Holly Hunter and Paul Giamatti. And May 4th, we will be at the Wiltern. The three of us live here in Los Angeles. With our guests Brittany Snow and Malin Ackerman. And really get your tickets now. It's gonna be a good one. Also, I will be performing as part of the Stand up For Equality show March 4th in Los Angeles with Mateo Lane Margaret show. It's going to be a really, really fun show.

[Fortune Feimster]

All right, well, until next time, keep it handsome. Handsome is hosted by me, Fortune Feimster, Tig Notaro, and May Martin. The show is produced, recorded and edited by Thomas Wuelette.

[May Martin]

Email [e-mail] and follow us on social media.

[Fortune Feimster]

Ansomepod what a podcast.

[Meg Stalter]

What a podcast.

[Announcer]

That was a Headgum podcast.

[Sponsor Voice]

Checking Allstate first could save you hundreds on car insurance. That's smart, not checking who serves the

[Tig Notaro]

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[Sponsor Voice]

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[Gareth Reynolds]

Northbrook, Illinois Hey, I'm Gareth Reynolds and I have a new podcast on Headgum called Next we have. Now this show is for people with short attention spans, which is everyone. I mean, you're probably trying to skip this ad right now, but don't because you now legally have to listen to the show. That's how law works. Next we have is very simple. Each episode has three short segments. For instance, Lisa Gilroy and I write insane revenge Yelp reviews for callers who had bad experiences with a business. The Doughboys play a game called Meal or no Meal and Steph, Tola and I go head to head on a thought provoking game game called Guess that Sound. The show is as dumb as it sounds and we probably have more fun than we should, but it's a great time and you should listen or watch new episodes of Next we have every Thursday on YouTube or your favorite podcast, Apple.