G Flip asks about childhood career goals

Summary

Handsome Podcast Episode Summary: "G Flip Asks About Childhood Career Goals"

Release Date: June 24, 2025
Hosts: Tig Notaro, Fortune Feimster, Mae Martin
Question Asker: G Flip

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I. Episode Overview

In this heartfelt and humorous episode of the Handsome podcast, hosts Tig Notaro, Fortune Feimster, and Mae Martin delve into their childhood aspirations, prompted by a thoughtful question from musician G Flip. Balancing emotional depth with their signature comedic flair, the trio shares personal stories, reflections, and laughs, offering listeners an intimate glimpse into their younger selves and the dreams that shaped their paths.

II. Emotional Reflections and Personal Updates [02:00 - 13:38]

The episode opens with the hosts catching up, with Mae Martin revealing she’s feeling under the weather:

[02:24] Mae Martin: "We were supposed to be in person today, and I'm... I'm sick."

Fortune Feimster encourages Mae, leading to a supportive and warm conversation. This segment sets a compassionate tone, highlighting the strong camaraderie among the hosts.

Fortune shares a poignant update about her mother’s health journey:

[09:08] Fortune Feimster: "He basically said... don't think about lifespan and numbers and just let's... see how it unfolds."

This heartfelt moment underscores the episode's depth, as the hosts navigate both personal challenges and triumphs together.

III. Introduction to G Flip’s Question [37:34 - 39:52]

After sharing personal updates and engaging in light-hearted banter, G Flip’s question is introduced:

[39:52] G Flip: "When you were all younger, what did you want to be when you were older?"

This question prompts the hosts to reflect on their childhood dreams, leading to a blend of nostalgia, humor, and introspection.

IV. Hosts' Childhood Career Aspirations

A. Mae Martin’s Childhood Dreams [40:12 - 43:56]

Mae Martin reminisces about her youthful fantasies:

[40:14] Mae Martin: "I wanted to be a boy... to be alone, living in a treehouse with animals as friends."

She elaborates on her desire for independence and creative expression, sharing dreams of becoming an itinerant poet and living a life surrounded by nature.

B. Fortune Feimster’s Childhood Dreams [42:30 - 51:07]

Fortune Feimster reveals a diverse array of childhood aspirations:

[42:36] Fortune Feimster: "I wanted to be a veterinarian, architect, and musician. I even aspired to be the fifth Beatle."

She recounts an anecdote from her youth where a neighbor informed her mother of her budding comedic talent, sparking her journey into entertainment:

[46:25] Fortune Feimster: "I felt seen... that was exhilarating."

Fortune also shares a touching memory of her father's affectionate nature despite his tough exterior:

[17:18] Fortune Feimster: "He never doubted his love. Some people just know they could save hundreds on car insurance by checking Allstate first."

C. Tig Notaro’s Childhood Dreams [43:46 - 46:13]

Tig Notaro reflects on her early aspirations with a mix of humor and sincerity:

[43:46] Tig Notaro: "I peaked. I was the most gorgeous I've ever been at five years old."

She shares memories of a kindergarten activity involving hammering nails, led by a memorable teacher who was later revealed to be a closeted gay man:

[44:37] Tig Notaro: "He was amazing, everyone wanted him as a teacher."

Tig also discusses her artistic inclinations from a young age, highlighting her love for drawing and creativity:

[45:28] Tig Notaro: "I thought I was going to be a real artiste. I have a picture of me in kindergarten with these luscious locks...!"

V. Personal Anecdotes and Shared Stories [48:05 - 62:05]

The conversation deepens as the hosts share more personal stories related to their childhood dreams:

• Fortune describes a whimsical adventure where she and her girlfriend set up a drum set on a golf course at midnight:

  [58:18] Fortune Feimster: "We hauled the drum set out... and just went nuts. We were, like, so free."

• Mae reminisces about her urban escapades, such as drinking chocolate milk by graves in Mount Pleasant Cemetery:

  [55:14] Mae Martin: "I would always go there with a... buy a gallon of chocolate milk... sit by the graves and drink that."

• Tig shares her early love for construction and art, illustrating how these interests formed the foundation of her creative pursuits:

  [43:46] Tig Notaro: "I wanted to be a construction worker or artist."

Throughout these exchanges, the hosts seamlessly blend humor with heartfelt moments, creating a relatable and engaging narrative for listeners.

VI. Current Updates and Future Plans [63:38 - 68:51]

As the episode wraps up, the hosts share updates about their current projects and upcoming tours:

• Tig Notaro announces her tour dates, providing fans with exciting news about her performances:

  [63:59] Tig Notaro: "I'll be at the Thunder Valley Casino Resort in Lincoln, California on June 27... and Boston, among many other dates that are coming."

• Fortune Feimster discusses her new documentary and upcoming concerts, revealing her creative endeavors beyond comedy:

  [64:49] Fortune Feimster: "On tour, you might like to listen to some of Mae's great tunes that Mae's got going on."

• Mae Martin hints at her latest projects, encouraging listeners to stay connected through social media:

  [66:14] Mae Martin: "Check out my Instagram. I've always got shows in LA at Largo and Dynasty Typewriter, but I'm just chilling out, so..."

VII. Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• [09:08] Fortune Feimster: "That's the epitome of a great bedside manner."
• [14:14] Fortune Feimster: "I got mixed up knowing that my father loved me and my brother, even though he wasn't around much."
• [43:46] Tig Notaro: "I peaked. I was the most gorgeous I've ever been at five years old."
• [58:18] Fortune Feimster: "We hauled the drum set out... and just went nuts. We were, like, so free."
• [46:25] Fortune Feimster: "I felt seen... that was exhilarating."
• [48:05] Fortune Feimster: "I didn’t realize Tig was funny."

VIII. Conclusion

This episode of Handsome masterfully intertwines humor with poignant reflections, allowing listeners to connect deeply with the hosts' personal journeys. By exploring their childhood dreams and the experiences that shaped them, Tig, Fortune, and Mae create an engaging and relatable narrative that resonates with audiences. Whether reminiscing about treehouses and drum sets or sharing heartfelt stories about family and personal growth, the hosts exemplify the essence of Handsome—a blend of fun, friendship, and meaningful conversation.

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Note: The timestamps provided correspond to key moments in the episode, enhancing the summary's alignment with the original content for reference.

Transcript

[Tig Notaro]

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[Fortune Feimster]

Like, you know to check that the beach you're headed to for a day lying in the sun is made of sand and not rocky boulders.

[Tig Notaro]

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[Fortune Feimster]

One thing I always look for when I'm booking a trip away is a pool. Whether it's treading water or swimming with the whole family, booking.com makes it easy to find a place with a big pool. A hot tub is a bonus, as is a sauna and the ultimate cherry on top, a water slide or a diving board. What says summer fun more than doing a cannonball in a hotel pool? If our family can find their perfect stay on booking.com, anyone can find exactly.

[Tig Notaro]

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[May Martin]

Chatting with friends on the Handsome Pod.

[Tig Notaro]

Cheers.

[Fortune Feimster]

Welcome to the Handsome Pod. It's me, your friend and host. Take Notaro sitting here with Fortune Feimster.

[May Martin]

Me and me, May, Martin.

[Tig Notaro]

And Biggie. He's here, too, is he?

[May Martin]

And Thomas. There he is.

[Fortune Feimster]

There he is.

[May Martin]

Oh, hi, Biggie.

[Fortune Feimster]

Biggie flying on in on his bed.

[Tig Notaro]

He's gonna sleep now.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah. Yeah. That is the life.

[May Martin]

Good to see you, too.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, yeah. Good to see you.

[May Martin]

We were supposed to be in person today, and I'm. I'm sick.

[Tig Notaro]

So, you know, a little sicky poo.

[May Martin]

Yeah, man. I'm sick. It's so boring and no one cares.

[Tig Notaro]

We care. We want you to be okay. But we do appreciate you not getting us sick, right?

[May Martin]

Well, yeah. That's what I'm always thinking about.

[Fortune Feimster]

Tell us about your sickness.

[May Martin]

Well, thanks. It's riveting.

[Tig Notaro]

It's.

[May Martin]

We're talking a classic cult. I'm drinking a hot beverage out of. Actually, out of a mug that a handsome listener gave us at a live show. There's a pineapple apart and there you.

[Fortune Feimster]

Go, oh, that is a nice mug, isn't it?

[May Martin]

It's my style of mug. Because it's, like, big.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Big.

[May Martin]

It's earthy. It's like, you know.

[Fortune Feimster]

That's good. That is really good. Think of all of the things that our listeners have made and haven't been able to give to us, you know, because we get things sent to us, handed to us. Remember that woman tracked me down, ran down the airport in Austin to give me the Biggie Dead eyes.

[Tig Notaro]

That's right.

[Fortune Feimster]

T shirt.

[Tig Notaro]

Right. We had things crocheted for us.

[May Martin]

Yeah. Somebody knitted. Yeah. Crocheted a guacamole. Avocado bear.

[Tig Notaro]

That. And then the. What are the things called when it's, like, in a wooden circle?

[May Martin]

Oh, like needlepoint.

[Tig Notaro]

Needle point. We've had that very.

[Fortune Feimster]

What are those things?

[Tig Notaro]

I don't know.

[Fortune Feimster]

In a wooden circle.

[Tig Notaro]

Crafty.

[Fortune Feimster]

I never would have guessed needlepoint.

[May Martin]

Really?

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah. You would have held me hostage for life trying to guess. I would have guessed wooden nickel.

[Tig Notaro]

Wooden nickel for sure.

[Fortune Feimster]

That. That'd be my. My guess.

[Tig Notaro]

What was that thing you guess on Celebrity? Wheel of Fortune.

[Fortune Feimster]

How dare you. How dare you.

[Tig Notaro]

It was. What was it I've ever seen in my life?

[Fortune Feimster]

It was the what?

[Tig Notaro]

One of the funniest things I've ever seen in my life.

[Fortune Feimster]

It was not meant to be funny. Fortune, Marie.

[Tig Notaro]

It was so funny. Fortune.

[Fortune Feimster]

Do not embarrass me like this in front of our listeners. Yes, yes, yes. Well, what was it.

[Tig Notaro]

May? You have to Google it. It's the greatest.

[Fortune Feimster]

They don't Google it.

[Tig Notaro]

So obvious what it was. But what did you say it was? It was like riding an exercise bike or something.

[Fortune Feimster]

You know, you have to.

[Tig Notaro]

I sucked at Celebrity Jeopardy, so I can laugh.

[Fortune Feimster]

Well, you know, they give you just bits and pieces of the sentence or phrase, and I chose crap. Crash. Crashing my Exorcist bike. That was fortune, Marie.

[Tig Notaro]

I cried laughing at that.

[Fortune Feimster]

I had to stand by what I said.

[Tig Notaro]

And you did.

[Fortune Feimster]

I did. I stood firm right there with Thomas Lennon and Nikki Glaser laughing at me.

[Tig Notaro]

That was one of the best TV moments in a while.

[Fortune Feimster]

Crashing my Exorcist bike. That was my delivery. As it was coming out of my mouth, I was like, this cannot possibly be the answer. But I didn't know what else could be the answer. And as soon as I realized it was exercise and not Exorcist.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

Uh, it still made no sense, but made more sense than my Exorcist bike.

[Tig Notaro]

So, so funny that that brought me a good tickle thank you.

[Fortune Feimster]

You are the worst. Fortune.

[Tig Notaro]

No.

[May Martin]

How good is it that that moment is immortalized? Like most people's embarrassing moments just live in their memories. That is forever. That will forever exist.

[Fortune Feimster]

How do you know it was embarrassing? I was proud. It was a proud moment. Oh, my. Go. Crashing.

[Tig Notaro]

Listen, I'll never play on Celebrity Jeopardy. Again, I'll tell you that.

[Fortune Feimster]

Why?

[May Martin]

Like, are you banned?

[Tig Notaro]

No, no, I just was not great. I had a hard time with the buzzer, and I answered some just dumbass things.

[Fortune Feimster]

And the worst thing is we're playing for charity.

[May Martin]

Oh, God.

[Fortune Feimster]

And so, like, you want to help people, you want to raise money, you want to do what's right. And then it's like, oh, my gosh, I'm a buffoon. Your organization. And my sincerest apologies. I felt like such a failure chiming in with, you know, crashing my exorcist bike. What the hell did I just say?

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, but you want them. You want a money regardless.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

But it's all for a good cause.

[Fortune Feimster]

Could have gotten them more.

[Tig Notaro]

That's all right.

[Fortune Feimster]

Thanks.

[Tig Notaro]

Next time.

[Fortune Feimster]

I think there will be a next time.

[May Martin]

I want you to go back on. And then it's a similar clue. And you're like, this time I'm not gonna up. And so you're like, exercise bike. And like, it was actually exorcist bike.

[Fortune Feimster]

Damn. Got me. What else? What's shaken? How's your mother fortune?

[Tig Notaro]

She's doing. Doing all right. I just went to go visit her, so we had some nice chats. We found a bench. You know, I love sitting on a bench and just.

[May Martin]

You're easy to. You're easy to please.

[Tig Notaro]

Honestly, I am. I just. I was in my hometown, and it's such a cute little area, and we just went to the park and sat and chatted for a while. She went to Emory in Atlanta and met with a. A specialist who, you know, gave her. Gave her some hope, which she was really happy about.

[Fortune Feimster]

That's amazing.

[Tig Notaro]

Everybody else she had talked to kind of was. Has been a little doom and gloom. And he basically said, you know, like, you got to do three months of chemo before we can even begin to come up with a plan, because we need to see how your body responds to it. And everybody's body is different in its response. So once you do that, you'll come back. And then, you know, there's a lot of things, a lot of trials and a lot of, you know, whatever. And don't think about lifespan and numbers and just let's. You Know, start this journey and. And see how it unfolds.

[Fortune Feimster]

Well, that's the epitome of a great bedside manner.

[May Martin]

Yeah. You know, just like, one day at a time.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah. And just having that openness and I think it. It's really something that positivity that you get around you and that you feel and that it's all telling your body a. Yeah. And. Yeah, I think that's really, really great.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. So she had, like, a pep in her step when she called.

[May Martin]

Great.

[Fortune Feimster]

That's amazing.

[Tig Notaro]

And, yeah, she said she was very happy. She went, and now she's going to start this chemo journey.

[Fortune Feimster]

It's a. It's a road. But, man, I'm glad that she found what sounds like one of the best places to go for what she has. And then having a doctor with that kind of vibe and.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

That news and.

[Tig Notaro]

And he was like, you know, listen, I'm not going to sugarcoat it. It's a. You have. This is a tough. What you have is not great. You know, like, this is a tough road, but we'll just. We're just gonna do it like you said, day by day, take it and see what. What all we can do.

[Fortune Feimster]

You know, sometimes it is like you said, he didn't sugarcoat it. And I think that's. I mean, the vibe, obviously, I didn't meet this guy, but the vibe sounds just. Just really good because of not sugar coating it and because he's not doom and gloom and leaving that openness for reality and that reality being a medical reality, but also an emotional reality, like, to leave that space open for you to kind of bounce between the two, because it's going to be an ongoing roller coaster. It's not great. But here's what's positive about it.

[May Martin]

And letting it be unwritten. The future, you know?

[Tig Notaro]

Right.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

And apparently that's kind of the vibe of the. This Emory Winship whole program is. A lot of people approach it, approach it everything from a positive position of, like, attitude, you know, just a very good demeanor and attitude. So she's definitely in a good place. So happy. Happy about that. And happy she feels. Feels the. The oomph to fight and get through this.

[May Martin]

She's. I feel like she's gonna be. She's gonna be really popular in the chemo space. Like, she's gonna. All the, like, the nurses are gonna love her.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, yeah.

[May Martin]

She's gonna make friends.

[Fortune Feimster]

She will inspire others.

[Tig Notaro]

She will make the most of this terrible situation. For sure.

[May Martin]

100%.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

Well, thanks thanks for sharing it with us.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, for sure.

[May Martin]

So when'd you get back?

[Tig Notaro]

Like, two days ago.

[May Martin]

Okay, cool.

[Tig Notaro]

I'll be kind of popping in and out of North Carolina a lot more. You know, just. Even if it's for a short visit, just. Why not?

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

How about you guys? What's up with y' all?

[May Martin]

Well, I just got. I told Tig on a mini episode, but I went to the desert, and then I guess, like, this is the Lord punishing me for going to the desert. I got a cold. And then.

[Fortune Feimster]

Is that what people usually leave the desert with is a cold?

[Tig Notaro]

Did you make out? Did you make out with strangers in the desert? Is that why you got a cold with a lizard?

[May Martin]

And a strange ghost I met in Joshua Tree National Park.

[Fortune Feimster]

A strange ghost?

[May Martin]

You know what I found out? Dung beetles navigate using the Milky Way as their navigation system, and they're the only animal that does that.

[Fortune Feimster]

Mayfact. Mayfax.

[Tig Notaro]

And not the Milky Way. Candy bar Fortune.

[Fortune Feimster]

I'm gonna sit this out for a second.

[Tig Notaro]

You guys. Can't stop. Won't stop.

[Fortune Feimster]

You can't stop.

[Tig Notaro]

That I could, but do you want.

[Fortune Feimster]

Me to ken so it's can stop. Won't stop. Okay.

[May Martin]

Can't stop. Don't want to stop.

[Tig Notaro]

That's right.

[May Martin]

What about you, Tig? What's up?

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, what is up? Gosh.

[May Martin]

Anyway, should we go to our question?

[Fortune Feimster]

Yes.

[Tig Notaro]

Let's go.

[Fortune Feimster]

Let me question. If I'm honest, I had a bit of a weird day today, but it's. Yeah, it's good. Stephanie and I go on a. A walk every morning.

[May Martin]

Oh.

[Fortune Feimster]

And, yeah, we drop Max and Finn off, and then we go on a walk, and. I don't know. I. You know how just something from your life sneaks up on you and then just wrestles you to the ground?

[Tig Notaro]

Really?

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

Like from your past.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah. Just. I mean, not to fully go in. Neck deep into anything, but I think it's just the. The gist of it is loving our kids so much. And it spun into a conversation of knowing that my father loved me and my brother so much, and he just wasn't really. So many factors in life made him not available or around and whatever, and it tripped me up when we were talking about it, and I got so emotional and. And I was saying, I've never been mad at my father. I've always just been sad or missed him or confused, you know, through my childhood, and. But it's also through the eyes of being a parent that I know he meant well. And I know he loved me. And I understand his life. I understand his trajectory. I get what happened, you know, for the most part, and. And then it just came back around to me understanding myself more and just hoping that in whatever ways that I fumble in life that my kids will feel that way. Not that this is born out of, like, some huge fumble of mine, but it's. That's. Like I said, I'm not trying to get neck deep into it, but it was so fascinating because it's a topic that typically does not trip me up.

[Tig Notaro]

Right.

[Fortune Feimster]

Man, not only did it trip me, it got me on the walk. And I went home, and I started writing like crazy, really. I mean, I started writing about my father. I started writing about my stepfather. I started just. I got into so much stuff because even though I was, like, tremendously emotional, I was saying certain things that was making. I was making jokes, and Stephanie would start laughing so hard where she was like, oh, my God. Like, just the. That juxtaposition of.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

The joke on what I was talking about. Yeah. And I was like, I just have to go home and, like, really get into this. And it was fascinating because it's been my whole day of. And then Stephanie went and did something, came home, and I was filling her in on it, and then I got emotional all over again. It's just. Yeah. So. But I'm. I'm. I'm good. And it's. But it's been really, really fascinating.

[May Martin]

Yeah. It sounds like something was un. Unplugged unexpectedly. And then the fact that you. It's flowing out of you to write is. That's great.

[Fortune Feimster]

Well. And again, it was so born out of love for Max and Finn. And then, you know, I was telling Stephanie about this moment in my childhood that my father came to visit us at my grandparents, my grandmother's house. And he was kneeling on one knee, and we were, like, 8 and 9, and he had his arm around both of us, and he was just sobbing, saying, I love you guys so much. And. And it was so. And Stephanie was like, wow. So he. He emoted like that. I was like, oh, yeah. He had no problem.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

With crying about any of that stuff. And this is a guy that walked around with a knife and a pistol in his cowboy boots. And that's not to say that's how everyone should be gearing up. But. Yeah. It was just. It was. I just never. Never doubted his love. Some people just know they could save hundreds on car insurance by checking Allstate first.

[Tig Notaro]

Like, you know, to check that, you've got a bright enough light bulb for your reading lamp so you're not having to squint when you're staying up all night with that new book.

[Fortune Feimster]

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[Fortune Feimster]

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[Tig Notaro]

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[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah, I mean, my parents divorced when I was six months and he was the guy that my grandmother, my mother's mother didn't approve of and, and when they split he was, you know, they were young partiers and.

[Tig Notaro]

Right.

[Fortune Feimster]

You know, two babies are born and they were in their 20s and you know, in the 70s, people weren't consciously uncoupling. It was, it was very severed and, and not terribly open and it. A lot of complications in life.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

Your, your mom had full custody.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah. Yeah. But we would see him every now and then and, and there's. There was a lot, there was a lot, a lot, a lot. But I think losing my mother and then my stepfather and there's kind of backed up emotions, I think in, in processing somebody else, another parent who wasn't directly always in my life. And I kind of feel like I hit it today. Yeah, I mean I've been sad before and, and stuff, but like this was just like, not just sadness, it was like a real awakening and my, like I said my love for my kids like cracked it open and, and really got made me get in touch with his love for, for us.

[May Martin]

You know, it's funny, like we have so much fluency now around like mental health and I feel like we have so much empathy for our parents generation and our grandparents and.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

So it's, it's tough sometimes multiple feelings are existing at once because you so clearly see this like wounded person. But then also, you know how it's affected you and it's a tough thing to balance.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh yeah, it's, it's really interesting. Like I feel like I did, I feel like I did like some sort of drug trip where I was like, yeah, I love everything and everyone and I get it. You know what I mean?

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

I forgive and I hope you forgive me and I, you know, all of those things just.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

Hitting it once and it, it, you know, any sadness also felt just good too.

[May Martin]

Think about like, like the, the generosity that you were that showing him and, and your mom and everything and the love and you know, in this circumstance it's like there's no doubt that your kids for your, any minor fumble are going to have the same perspective, you know?

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

You're the three dimensional human being for sure.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah, yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. I've been, I've been having that like thing going through different things in my life right now where it's made me understand what my parents were dealing with when they were my age and I Thought they were, like, so old when all their, you know, fractures were happening and.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

And they were. I'm like, I. We were the same age. That's crazy to me.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

You're the exact same age. Right?

[Tig Notaro]

The exact. Yeah. My parents divorced that. This. The age I am right now. Wow. And it just made me. When I realized that I was just like, oh, my God. Not that I was like. I never really held on to their divorce in that kind of, like, victimy way, but. Yeah, it definitely just made me see them as, like. Oh, they just were doing the best they could. Right. For sure. Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

And that was. Was that in the 80s?

[Tig Notaro]

That would have been 92.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, okay.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

You guys are having deep thoughts today. I like it. It's. You know, I gotta say, this cold is making me think about all colds, really.

[Tig Notaro]

I feel I wasn't having that thought today, but Tig's journey made me think of that. That has been on my mind. Just. Just seeing. Seeing your parents in. In that more vulnerable way of, like, you know.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

I don't. I don't know what I would have done in their position had I been three kids, deep, no money. You know, like, you make the decisions you make and try to not mess people up too much. Oh, man. Yeah.

[May Martin]

I've recently been encouraging my parents to drink water. And then I was like, when did that. When did that happen?

[Tig Notaro]

That I like parenting?

[May Martin]

Yeah. Yeah. Like, as a kid, it never crosses your mind, your parents.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

Need to drink more water?

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

And are they doing it?

[May Martin]

I don't know. I'll check in the next. I'll let you know.

[Tig Notaro]

Their skins glowing next time you see them.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Like, it never occurred to us to drink water until you said something. Well, I think that was good for you. I think it's good to have these, like, releases too, you know?

[Fortune Feimster]

Well, yeah, it's just. It's crazy when they. I mean, I am never walking down the sidewalk, boohooing, you know, it's not really the place where. And I'm. I'm not like, a hard cry. I definitely. And that's what Stephanie was pointing out. She was like, wow. So your brother, your mother and your dad and yourself, you're all criers? Yeah. And I'm like, yeah, fully.

[May Martin]

Is Stephanie not Stephanie. Not a crier?

[Fortune Feimster]

Not really. I mean, she does for sure. But I. I beat her to it every time.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. Every single time I cries, I try to be stoic, but it just. It comes. The cancer in me is just, like, emoting right away. And It.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah. And again, it's like when it hits you from behind and. And I was like, oh, I'm. I'm about to cry, which is what I said on the walk. And Stephanie is like, oh. And I was like, wow, I'm a little surprised right now, you know, and. But it was such a good release.

[Tig Notaro]

And.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah. Like, I said to sit down and just write. And I told Stephanie. I was like, I don't know if is for me or for the rest of the world or what, but I wrote about my father, I wrote about my stepfather. I wrote about. Yeah. Everything that came to my mind and all serious and jokes, everything.

[Tig Notaro]

That's your sweet spot, though.

[May Martin]

Yeah. And the best thing is to write it just for you, as if no one's ever going to hear it and then decide once it's written, then you get the real juice out.

[Fortune Feimster]

Do you ever find yourself writing for the audience or. And then back up or are you always like, this is for me and I hope you come along sometimes.

[May Martin]

Sometimes I feel like there's pressure to have a clear point of view on things for an audience when I might not know how I feel about anything. I don't know. Yeah. Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

I haven't my stand up. I haven't dug crazy deep emotionally. There are clearly some things happening in my life right now that are going to require that, and I haven't begun that process, and I will be interested to see what that looks like.

[Fortune Feimster]

So you are open to that?

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, I think there's some stuff I'll, you know, I'm not going to get crazy personal, but there will be things to share. But I don't know what that. I'm not gonna force it.

[Fortune Feimster]

Right.

[Tig Notaro]

I'm just gonna see that as my life unfolds and evolves, what that looks like in terms of what I do talk about.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

Well. And that ties into. You're doing it for yourself and you can't do it for the audience. Like, even if the audience is like, give us all the details, some aren't for them.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, for sure. And they won't be. Yeah. But. Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

And maybe all of them. Maybe all isn't for them. Right. It just goes back to what you're most comfortable with.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. But I think, like, the reflection of big changes in life and headed into a new direction is of something to discuss at some point.

[May Martin]

Very relatable, I think, to so many people.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah, no doubt.

[Tig Notaro]

Good times. Well, yeah. So I won't just be making just Cooter jokes around here. Don't you Worry.

[Fortune Feimster]

What about charcuterie?

[Tig Notaro]

Well, still make cooter jokes for sure. Yeah, I guess it's not. They're not just going away.

[Fortune Feimster]

No, you mean cooters.

[Tig Notaro]

Or hopefully cooters are here to stay.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, Fortune, Marie, should we move on to our guest?

[Tig Notaro]

Yes. Well, today's question asker is an awesome musician from Meban. Oh, boy.

[Fortune Feimster]

Wait.

[Tig Notaro]

Melbourne.

[May Martin]

But they say.

[Tig Notaro]

They don't say Meban.

[Fortune Feimster]

They don't say Melbourne, Australia.

[May Martin]

They say Melbourne.

[Tig Notaro]

Melbourne. But I don't want to impress you guys with my Australian accent. Like, once again.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, I have something for you, Fortune. Please try this. You as well, May. Rise up. Lights.

[May Martin]

Oh, my God.

[Tig Notaro]

Rise of lines. Rise of lines.

[May Martin]

Oh, my God. Wait, I'm gonna. I just want to Google sentences to practice Australian accent.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, that keyboard is fast. Quite right for us.

[May Martin]

So was it really loud?

[Tig Notaro]

Are you serious? Typewriter?

[Fortune Feimster]

We are dead serious. May.

[May Martin]

I couldn't hear it. Okay.

[Tig Notaro]

There's some rain, some lines. Jennifer Lopez. That's a good one. Jennifer Lopez in her lip. Lip taint.

[May Martin]

Yeah, they're just giving me examples of like put a shrimp on the barbie and stuff.

[Tig Notaro]

Put another shrimp on the barbie, mate. I can't. My accent just got worse.

[Fortune Feimster]

Let's introduce our question answer.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, we'll, we'll. We'll continue where we're not cutting that out, okay?

[Fortune Feimster]

Of course not.

[Tig Notaro]

I'll go back and repeat myself so we can give our friend a proper introduction. Our question asker for today is from Melbourne, Australia, whose platinum charting singles include Killing My Time and Drinking Too Much. Their album Drummer won the 2023 J Award for Australian album of the year. W. G Flip is asking today's question. Yeah, G Flip's so cool. I'm actually gonna be in a. I don't know if it's a secret, but I'm in a music video of G Flips.

[Fortune Feimster]

Seriously, secret is out. You heard it here first on Handsome.

[Tig Notaro]

You flips like an amazing drummer, but also sings and plays guitar and it's just super rad and nice. And we met last summer at a Pride event and we believe that building.

[Fortune Feimster]

A website should be easy. That's why Handsome is brought to you by Squarespace. Squarespace gives you everything you need to claim your domain, showcase your offerings with a professional website, grow your brand, and get paid all in one place.

[Tig Notaro]

Plus, Squarespace has integrated SEO tools, so you show up more often in searches and find more of your ideal customers or visitors. There are easy integrations for donations, whether you're looking for one time or recurring contributions. Plus, Squarespace makes it easy to showcase video content on your website with stunning video libraries and monetizable solutions perfect for online courses and premium workshops.

[Fortune Feimster]

So what are you waiting for? Get started on your dream website today. Head to squarespace.com handsome for a free trial and when you're ready to launch, users offer code handsome to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.

[Tig Notaro]

McDonald's collab with Monopoly in the 90s was brilliant on paper. The problem? Their head of security orchestrated the ultimate.

[May Martin]

Inside job on Wondry's podcast the Big Flop. Comedians join host Misha Brown to chronicle pop culture's biggest fails and try to answer the age old question, who thought this was a good idea?

[Tig Notaro]

Listen to the Big Flop wherever you get your podcast.

[May Martin]

I'm not big on trends, but I am big on clothes that feel good and last, you know, handsome clothes. That's why I keep going back to Quints. Their lightweight layers and high quality staples have become my everyday essentials.

[Fortune Feimster]

Quints has all the things you actually want to wear this summer, like organic cotton silk polos, European linen beach shorts and comfortable pants that work for everything from backyard hangs to nice dinners. The best part, everything with Quint is half the cost of similar brands for the summer. I got some of Quint's vintage wash Tencel utility shorts. You can dress them up or down and they come in great colors like midnight blue and terracotta. I love how soft and breathable they are. Plus they're eco friendly compared to cotton.

[May Martin]

Stick to the staples that last with elevated essentials from quince. Go to quince.com handsome for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. That's Q-U-I-N-C-E.com handsome to get free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince.com handsome yeah, just a rad cool person. What are you gonna do in the music video? The thing that popped into my mind was do you remember that Enrique Iglesias music video for Hero that had. It was. I like the ones that are a big epic plot. It was like Jennifer Love.

[Tig Notaro]

I'm not naked in it.

[Fortune Feimster]

Well, then I'm not watching. I love that song Hero.

[Tig Notaro]

You do?

[Fortune Feimster]

I love it.

[Tig Notaro]

Wow. Yeah, I'm. I'm the comedic relief. All the other gay people in the video are the sexy people with them, you know, tank tops on. And then I come and I, I fuss at everyone and. And then we dance.

[Fortune Feimster]

We are all sexy to someone and we were all. We are also all terribly unsexy to others.

[May Martin]

That's so true. That's so true.

[Tig Notaro]

I will. Because, you know, G flips. Are they married? Chris Shell is G flip' from selling Sunset. They're a very good looking couple. Oh, my God.

[Fortune Feimster]

They are married.

[Tig Notaro]

They are married. Yeah. And so Chrishell was there watching and I was like, I gotta bring the sexy because the two of them are very good looking. So I did my best to like, do the, like, smolder, you know.

[Fortune Feimster]

Well, yeah, we've seen that.

[May Martin]

With the eyes wide. It's a little scary. That was really scary.

[Fortune Feimster]

What sort of message are you sending?

[May Martin]

The eyes wide. Really?

[Tig Notaro]

How about this?

[May Martin]

That's pretty good. So you've already filmed it?

[Tig Notaro]

I did. I bet it's coming out Pride month. It's probably already out because we are in Pride month. Almost. Wait, at the end of it, have.

[May Martin]

We heard their question yet?

[Fortune Feimster]

No, we haven't.

[Tig Notaro]

Things to talk about.

[May Martin]

Sorry, sorry, sorry.

[Fortune Feimster]

With attention spans like ours, we had things to get to. What's up, handsome Podcast. It's G Flip here. Huge fans of all of you. Tig May, Fortune. Love what you all do. And my little question is, when you were all younger, what did you want to be when you were older?

[Tig Notaro]

And this is like before maybe we.

[Fortune Feimster]

Wanted to be in the entertainment industry, like when we're 3, 4, 5 years old.

[Tig Notaro]

Keeping it wholesome.

[Fortune Feimster]

So yeah, that's my little question.

[Tig Notaro]

And love, all three of yours.

[Fortune Feimster]

Work.

[Tig Notaro]

You're awesome. I feel like I sound just like G Flip when I talk.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah, yeah.

[May Martin]

When you're Australian.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, yeah. Pretty.

[Fortune Feimster]

Do it again.

[Tig Notaro]

Hello, handsome.

[Fortune Feimster]

Hello.

[Tig Notaro]

Hello, handsome. I'm a fan of all of yours.

[Fortune Feimster]

I mean, how come we rarely get anybody from Ireland? Or.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh yeah, we should get an Irish person to say, hello, handsome. I have a question for you at the top of the morning.

[May Martin]

That was not bad.

[Tig Notaro]

It's better than my Australian accent for sure.

[Fortune Feimster]

But I feel like every other guest is Australian.

[Tig Notaro]

I'm here at in the Ireland, looking at the pretty grass and the rainbows and the pot of gold. And I'd really like to ask you a question.

[Fortune Feimster]

Where did fortune go?

[May Martin]

Alienate ourselves from every country?

[Fortune Feimster]

I know we're gonna see the numbers drop off.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Is there an Irish? Who could we ask? Colin Farrell.

[May Martin]

Jamie Dornan. Colin Farrell.

[Fortune Feimster]

Give us a ring. A ding follows.

[May Martin]

Colin. Colin. Colin.

[Tig Notaro]

Hey. Do you like that, Barry? Kit.

[Fortune Feimster]

Kit.

[Tig Notaro]

Well, don't you worry, we'll get some Irish blood up in here.

[May Martin]

Knock, knock.

[Tig Notaro]

Who's there?

[Fortune Feimster]

Come in.

[May Martin]

Interrupting Irish.

[Tig Notaro]

Interrupting Irish. Thank you. I think I. You came in a second too late.

[May Martin]

Really?

[Tig Notaro]

Huh.

[May Martin]

Wait, was there a delay?

[Tig Notaro]

I thought, yeah, I think there was a delay. I had finished and then you said it.

[Fortune Feimster]

Well, this fight is getting nasty.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, God. We have a good time.

[May Martin]

You know, we have a laugh.

[Tig Notaro]

We have a laugh.

[Fortune Feimster]

We have a laugh. We have a cough, we have a cry. We're handsome.

[Tig Notaro]

So when y' all were young, do you remember what you wanted to be?

[Fortune Feimster]

Do you do.

[May Martin]

I wanted to be a boy.

[Tig Notaro]

If I was a boy, even just for a day.

[May Martin]

My theme song. No, I think I. Then the weird thing is, I think from like a really young age, my mom told me I was gonna be an actor or a comedian.

[Tig Notaro]

You're going to be a boy?

[May Martin]

Yeah, boy. May. They were Irish. Yeah, I think I. Oh, like outside of the entertainment industry. I don't know. I think I always. Because my dad would talk about being an actor when he was young and like, so I was always kind of. It's like the opposite of most people. Like, my parents were like, that's a legit job. You should do that. What about you guys? Because the ones people always say are like vets. Astronauts.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, for sure. An astronaut was. Is. Was the go to at my school.

[May Martin]

Really?

[Tig Notaro]

Firemen for the boys.

[May Martin]

Really?

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. All those blue collar jobs and then an astronaut. Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

Or it would be like a teacher.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

Like, kids always want to be vets, but I think the reality of it they would find quite depressing.

[Tig Notaro]

It would be a hard job for sure. But if you loved him. Animals.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

I wanted to be a vet. I mean, I wanted to be several different things, but I had this white terry cloth jacket. And whenever one of our cats or our dog needed ointment or something, I would put that terry cloth jacket on and I would apply the ointment. Or if a goldfish died, I would put the jacket on. It looked like a vet jacket, and I would, you know, flush the goldfish. I don't know that that's the appropriate thing to do, but yeah, that is.

[Tig Notaro]

What people would do.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

I don't know.

[May Martin]

Do you think a vet would do that?

[Fortune Feimster]

I don't. I don't think the vet was going back there and just flushing goldfish, but maybe, I don't know.

[Tig Notaro]

Depends on the plumbing.

[Fortune Feimster]

I also was interested in an architect being an architect.

[May Martin]

Really?

[Fortune Feimster]

Yes.

[May Martin]

Like you're doing Lego and stuff and.

[Fortune Feimster]

No drawing plans out.

[May Martin]

Whoa.

[Fortune Feimster]

Wow. Yeah. I mean, I'm not saying they were good or, you know, you were building.

[May Martin]

A log cabin house, like designing your dream home. Or, like, tree houses and stuff. And.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah, I. I also think I was very. And this might tie back to my childhood and a. Going on, but I think I was drawing floor plans of where I'm gonna live. Like, move out of here.

[Tig Notaro]

I'm blowing this. Popsicles.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah. Yeah. So I was always drawing floor plans.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

I was like, yeah, maybe I'll be an architect.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

If they let kids actually design a city, like, and be the architects and do all the. It would. It would be. There'd be slides in every house and, like, those poles that you slide down.

[Tig Notaro]

Like Barbie. Barbie's dream house.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

Was that a dream?

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

What did you want to do? Fortune.

[Tig Notaro]

I'm trying to remember. I. I feel like I didn't have any goals when I was really young. I just wanted to be footloose and fancy free. So the fancy.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah, the saying, when was your most footloose and fancy free time of your life?

[Tig Notaro]

Because probably, like those young, young days. Kindergarten. I was.

[Fortune Feimster]

So you had already hit your dream.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, yeah. I peaked. I was the most gorgeous I've ever been. At five years old, my curls were popping.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

I have a picture of me in kindergarten with these luscious locks. And I was in my soccer cleats. I had a muscle tee on, of course. And our kindergarten teacher, as a activity for the class, had us hammering nails.

[May Martin]

What?

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, we were hammering nails at five.

[Fortune Feimster]

Years old with actual metal.

[Tig Notaro]

Actual giant hammers.

[May Martin]

A qualified teacher.

[Tig Notaro]

He was amazing, this teacher. He was a man. It was a. It was a man. He was in. A closeted gay man. We didn't know, but he came out a few years later. Good for him.

[Fortune Feimster]

He came out at school, like, did he.

[Tig Notaro]

He stopped teaching, I think, and then came out and then, unfortunately passed away. He was incredible. Everyone wanted him as a teacher. And. Yeah, I don't remember much, but I do remember that. And so clearly at 5, I wanted to be a construction worker. That was my dream. I wanted to be butcher. I wanted to, you know, take. Make sure the house was. Was repaired and standing. I think I would have. I did like to draw a lot, too. I. My. I learned how to draw an apple and.

[Fortune Feimster]

Good for you.

[May Martin]

Four chats. Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Thank you. I also drew Bart Simpson.

[May Martin]

Okay.

[Tig Notaro]

And. And an S with the. You know, how you do three lines and then the diamond.

[May Martin]

There's nothing more satisfying. Tig.

[Tig Notaro]

You know, my nose is kind of s. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

So I thought.

[Tig Notaro]

I thought I was gonna be. I wasn't thinking about architect as much, but I thought I Was going to be a real artiste. Like, you're gonna see my paintings.

[Fortune Feimster]

Do you still have that first apple you drew?

[Tig Notaro]

I don't see. There it is.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, whoops. There it is. It could also be an eight.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, but I thought I was learning how to do that. I was like, art is for me.

[Fortune Feimster]

I remember this neighbor of mine telling me when I was, like, in seventh grade, she said, my mom thinks you're gonna be a comedian.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, wow. No way.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, it was so exhilarating. Yeah, I. I felt seen.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

In a way I had not ever felt. I was like, whoa, your mother thinks I'm going to be a comedian?

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

I was in seventh grade and. And, you know, it's a crazy twist to this story is years later, my neighbor and her mother came to my show in Austin and they told me that there were four kids in their family, and my friend was the oldest, and she had a brother. I think her brother was the youngest of the four. Like, he was probably two or three, when. You know what I mean? Like, anyway. And when they came to my show, they told me that he was in the car with his mother as like a teenager or college age, something like that. And they were listening to this American Life. And I came on, I think this is right, that I came on, or I came on either this American Life or, like, local radio show playing comedy clips or whatever. And he said, oh, man, I love Tig Notaro. And she said, well, you know, she was your neighbor. And he was like, no, he had no idea. Because, like, yeah, because, like, I moved away. People grew up. Like, we didn't. We weren't close over the years. And he never knew that I live four houses down from him.

[Tig Notaro]

Funny.

[Fortune Feimster]

That's a trip. And he had said that to his mother who said, yeah, that I should be a comedian or something like that.

[May Martin]

So you must have been. You must have been funny around this mom.

[Fortune Feimster]

I. I was, I think.

[Tig Notaro]

Were you hitting on the mom?

[Fortune Feimster]

Probably.

[Tig Notaro]

You know, what's up, Susan?

[Fortune Feimster]

Also, whenever I would hear the Billy Joel song, what is it? Where he says, got a call from an old friend. We used to be real close. Something like now he's. Now he's giving stand up routine in la. What is that Billy Joel song? Every time I heard that line, I was like, it was electrifying.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

Because I secretly wanted to be a comedian, but I also didn't understand the path of putting up on stage. Stage. But, oh, the Bill. The Billy Jill song is my life. And there's a line that The. His friend moved out to the west coast and is now giving standup routine in la.

[May Martin]

That must be one of the only songs that references standup comedy.

[Fortune Feimster]

I know.

[May Martin]

I can't think of any other ones.

[Tig Notaro]

Well, it doesn't rhyme with anything.

[May Martin]

Comedy. Yeah, yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

Dramedy. Drama.

[May Martin]

Dramedy.

[Tig Notaro]

Dramedy. There you go.

[May Martin]

Vomity.

[Fortune Feimster]

Vomity.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, it did it.

[Fortune Feimster]

The vomity. When you don't do well in comedy.

[Tig Notaro]

Stand up and comedy were not on my radar for. Till I think college, maybe, or maybe late high school.

[Fortune Feimster]

Meaning you didn't follow it until then?

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, I didn't. You know, like, people now will be like, what. What stand up albums do you listen to growing up? And I was like, I mean, I love, like, Starting out Loud, but I didn't listen Stand up album, so Stand up was not on my radar.

[May Martin]

Did people tell you you were funny, though?

[Tig Notaro]

In flashes, I would. Well, I would have, like, pete, you're funny. I was pretty shy. And then I would have moments of, like, coming out of my shell and in those moments people would tell me I was funny.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

So those were the flashes. But I don't think. I don't think you would have. If you would ask anyone I grew up with that. They were like, maybe, maybe college people, but younger days, I don't think they were like, oh, yeah, she's gonna be a comedian.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah, I remember. And maybe I've mentioned this before, but in my documentary that the documentary made about me, I. The director is talking to my stepfather and he's talking about how he did not know that I was funny.

[Tig Notaro]

You didn't share that side of yourself with him.

[May Martin]

You forgot to tell him that.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah, I guess. I guess I didn't. I didn't let him know. But I thought that was so funny and incredible. He's like, yeah, I. I didn't realize Tig was funny.

[Tig Notaro]

But didn't you say once you got to, like, high school, you were like, more thinking your path was gonna be, like, music in the music business?

[Fortune Feimster]

Well, I got into the music business. I mean, I also wanted to be the fifth Beatle. When I used to listen to the Beatles when I was little, I. Even though they had broken up and John Lennon had died, when I had their record on, I was like, man, that is my goal in life. I'm going to be the fifth Beatle. And it was just not going to happen. I still don't think it's going to happen. But, yeah, I think. I think a. I think a. Yeah. Rock star, architect or vet.

[May Martin]

I Kind of thought I was going to be, like, just hitchhiking around, writing poems and, like, make. Having girlfriends and, like, I just wanted to be, like, an itinerant poet.

[Tig Notaro]

But, like, when you were really, really young, you thought about girls in that way?

[May Martin]

No, I guess when I was really young. No, I. It was more about, like. I definitely fantasized a lot about being alone when I was a kid. Like, about living in a treehouse and just having animals as friends and.

[Fortune Feimster]

Me, too.

[May Martin]

Yeah. And being on my own and in control of my own choices and stuff. Which is weird because I'm not that good on my own now. Like, I always have a friend staying with me. I'm always. I like being around people, but.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah, but you still have critters all in your yard, right?

[May Martin]

Do I ever have a menagerie of pals?

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah. I know whenever I would see TV shows or movies where, like, a kid lived alone in the woods or had a tree house or was living off the land and best friends with raccoons, I was like, where do I sign?

[May Martin]

Yes, exactly.

[Fortune Feimster]

This is the life for me. Like, I'm going to live off of berries, which is what I'm doing now. But even, like, when trees, like, trees really speak to me, and I was always up in one, always climbing trees. And we were leaving Max and Finn's baseball game the other day, and there was just this extraordinary tree. I was like, man, Max, look at that. He was like, I'm gonna climb it. And I was like, please do.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

So it was. Oh, yeah. And with his cleats on and everything. And it was. I was a little jealous.

[Tig Notaro]

I used to love to get lost in the woods.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yes.

[May Martin]

But you know that moment where, like, you're. You're blissed out, you're on your own in the woods, like, heart pounding and stuff, but then there's a moment where you're like. Like, oh, I'm. I'm too far, like, and you can't hear anyone anymore. And then you. And then you run back. You sprint back.

[Fortune Feimster]

In fact, I remember my stepfather. There was this creek that was near our house, and I. Oh, my gosh. I. I used to go out into the woods with a clipboard and paper, and I would take notes. I don't know what my job was that I was imagining. I was in, like, fourth grade, and I would be taking notes and I'd be drawing pictures of different animal tracks I was seeing and. And all that kind of stuff. And my stepfather, I remember, put on rubber boots, rubber steel tip boots to like, walk down that creek looking for me. Yeah. Because I was, like, so far gone. Yeah. Huckleberry Tig was nowhere to be found.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

You had to write. You had to make your report.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yes. I don't know. I remember one time I was in a sewage ditch and I had leeches on my legs, and I didn't know what they were.

[May Martin]

Stand By Me. That movie, Stand By Me.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, yeah. I didn't see that, but I. I had leeches that was on my legs.

[Tig Notaro]

It was before we worried about ticks and stuff.

[Fortune Feimster]

Anything.

[Tig Notaro]

We didn't care about anything back then. No sunscreen.

[Fortune Feimster]

I was smoking, you know.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

To grow up by a creek. Oh, man.

[Fortune Feimster]

Did you.

[May Martin]

No. It was very urban.

[Tig Notaro]

Always. Like, I was in a city, Right.

[May Martin]

Yeah. But I could walk to the cemetery, and Mount Pleasant Cemetery was this big. It was. It was really big. Like, you could drive around, and it was kind of the closest thing to nature near me. And so I would always go there with a. I'd go to the 711 and buy a gallon of chocolate milk. And me and my friend Nicole would go and sit by the graves and drink that. Drink the shit out of that chocolate milk.

[Tig Notaro]

Imagine the things these graves see or don't see.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

I remember one time I was in a graveyard. I was on tour, and I passed this graveyard, and I was like, I'm going to wander around. And I went into the graveyard and I saw this tombstone that had birthday decorations all around it and just, like, this celebratory vibe.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

And it was so. Stopped me in my tracks. Stopped me in my tracks.

[May Martin]

What about those big mausoleums? Like. Like, I imagine you die and you have a big, gothic, like, mausoleum built. A big little.

[Tig Notaro]

I don't think I'd want to be in one of those. No, I don't think so. I'd feel claustrophobic.

[Fortune Feimster]

You think you're claustrophobic?

[May Martin]

Guys, I keep making jokes that suck, and then. And then I.

[Fortune Feimster]

Let's hear it again.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, let's hear it again.

[Fortune Feimster]

There's nothing better than a repeated joke.

[Tig Notaro]

I missed it.

[May Martin]

Okay. You said, I don't think I want to be in. And I said, what about a wasp?

[Tig Notaro]

Wait.

[May Martin]

Okay, Okay.

[Fortune Feimster]

I don't get it.

[May Martin]

I don't think I want a be.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, okay.

[May Martin]

I don't think I want a be. One of those. What about a was.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, my gosh. May, you are on fire.

[Tig Notaro]

It is better now that you've told us.

[May Martin]

I'm telling you. I have always been destined to be a comedian.

[Fortune Feimster]

You have to write that down?

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

God.

[Tig Notaro]

You should put the. Insert that into something.

[Fortune Feimster]

I have to. This isn't from my childhood, but I did this as an adult and I felt like a child, and it was so freeing. And I cannot encourage people enough to do this. When I lived in Austin, my first girlfriend and I. She's an incredible musician. I play a little drums, a little guitar.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, you do. Rock star.

[Fortune Feimster]

I told her that I had always had a fantasy of taking my drum set in the middle of the night and setting it up in the middle of a golf course and just playing and people not knowing where the drums are coming from. Because who's going to be on a golf course in the middle of the night, right? No one. So we drive the drum set out there. Set it. I mean, like.

[Tig Notaro]

You did this?

[Fortune Feimster]

We did it. We did it.

[May Martin]

What?

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah. We haul the drum set out into, you know, piece by piece, out into the middle of the. The golf course. She brings her French horn, which she jammed on. And we. I played drums, she played French horn, and we just went nuts. We were, like, so free. We were laughing. We knew nobody was going to catch us. Nobody knew where it was coming from. And it was. I felt like a child.

[May Martin]

That's incredible.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

Also, what would you do? Like, if you did catch two people.

[Fortune Feimster]

Doing that, I don't think we'd get in a lot of trouble. It was a public golf course. I can't remember the name of it in Austin, but it's right there in the middle of. I don't know, maybe near Hyde Park, Whatever neighborhood that is, if you're a listener. In Austin. Yeah. My girlfriend and I went and set up in the middle of the night and just rocked it.

[Tig Notaro]

So spontaneous.

[May Martin]

I bet someone listening to this is gonna be like, oh, my God. That's what that was like. They heard.

[Tig Notaro]

I heard this noise.

[May Martin]

French horn. And no.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, she has a French horn. What? A specific instrument.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, my God. She played the tuba. She played the zither. Banjo, Piano, Drums. Guitar.

[Tig Notaro]

Whoa.

[May Martin]

I mean, Van Dyke, if you know what I mean.

[Fortune Feimster]

Everything we. I don't know. May Marie, can you explain it again? Oh, my God, Please.

[Tig Notaro]

One more joke.

[May Martin]

Dick Van Dyke, he's always. You know, he wears.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, and Chitty Chitty bank or Mary Poppins. Okay.

[May Martin]

He's got a drum, he's got a horn. He's got.

[Fortune Feimster]

That's another good one. And fried this down. No, that's. That's a good reference.

[May Martin]

So I've got Dick Van Dyke. I've got. Wanna. Wanna Be.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, my God. Also my ex that I did that with.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

Posted a video online of her one man band. She did the whole clanky clanky, strum, strum, accord. She plays accordion harmonically.

[Tig Notaro]

The big joke was real winner.

[May Martin]

It was on point.

[Fortune Feimster]

Should we get to our answer here?

[May Martin]

Yeah, we should say that that Spice Girl song wannabe should have. I could do wanna wasp. Anyways, let's hear G. No, no, no.

[Fortune Feimster]

Explain. No, let's.

[Tig Notaro]

Let's stop for a minute. Think about this. I would like to learn how to play the banjo.

[May Martin]

That's really hard. The banjo is harder than the guitar, I think.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh, Biggie's up from his nap.

[Tig Notaro]

He just want to say hi.

[Fortune Feimster]

Hi, Biggie. Let me see that face.

[Tig Notaro]

Okay, there he is.

[Fortune Feimster]

There he is every time. I can't believe that is a real face. And the tongue.

[Tig Notaro]

He got a little haircut.

[May Martin]

The tongue hanging out. What a guy.

[Fortune Feimster]

Don't show us his privates this time though. Okay.

[Tig Notaro]

Are we. Do we look alike? Yeah, kind of.

[Fortune Feimster]

Put your tongue out. There we are. Let's get that. Yeah. Twins.

[Tig Notaro]

He just wanted to say hi to his handsome friends.

[Fortune Feimster]

Oh my God. That. That is. That is insane that that face exists on this planet.

[Tig Notaro]

I feel like I. I like I don't want to overdo him and make people get tired of him, but I feel like his face makes people happy and they.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah, nobody's gonna get sick of that face.

[May Martin]

That's what I thought.

[Tig Notaro]

Thank you for letting me.

[Fortune Feimster]

If they are serial killer. That's a serial killer.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

All right.

[Fortune Feimster]

Should we hear the answer? And my answer to that question of mine is I was dead set on.

[Tig Notaro]

Being a taxi driver.

[Fortune Feimster]

I love, love cars, still love cars. And I just wanted to drive people around and just chat to random folks every day. And yeah, was real keen on being a taxi driver, which I guess if.

[Tig Notaro]

The music fails, I can always go back to. To my. My early dreams. You know what would have been a good kind of taxi cab driver? That. Remember that show Taxicab Confessions? Oh, yeah. If that make anyone want to be a taxi driver.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

I believe it because the. The got the hot goss that was happening in those taxis was pretty exciting.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

Also that's really interesting to love cars. And the go to is taxi cab driver. Like why not car sales person.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

Or race car driver.

[Tig Notaro]

Because they want a mechanic with people. I guess.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

They love to chat.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah, I guess.

[Tig Notaro]

Born to chat. Just like you, Tig.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah. Born to chat, girl.

[May Martin]

I have. You know, I have an ex with a tattoo. Btc. Born to Chat.

[Fortune Feimster]

Really?

[May Martin]

Thanks for the amazing question.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yes, G. Flip, we fun to reminisce about, you know, childhood. And I think it tied in nicely with that big parental intro.

[May Martin]

Yes, right, Absolutely. I really, I hope I get to meet G Flip and Chrishell soon.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, I'm sure you will.

[Fortune Feimster]

All in good time.

[May Martin]

All in good time.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah. Anybody have anything going on? I feel like Fortune isn't doing anything.

[Tig Notaro]

I sure do have some things going on. I'm on tour, you guys. I'll be at the Thunder Valley Casino Resort in Lincoln, California on June 27 and then taking a little time off in July, which is nice. And I'll be in Edmonton with Mateo Lane and July and then San Antonio, Houston, Norfolk, Virginia, Richmond, D.C. portland, Maine and Boston, among many other dates that are coming.

[May Martin]

Nice.

[Fortune Feimster]

Can I tell you something really ridiculous?

[Tig Notaro]

Please.

[Fortune Feimster]

Every time. And you know, obviously Thomas edits things nicely so it sounds all clean and like we're chiming in right away. And people don't realize that I am always slowly mentioning my tour dates.

[May Martin]

Yeah, you're googling them.

[Fortune Feimster]

Well, I have been doing that by pulling up my calendar.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[Fortune Feimster]

And going through each month and looking for shows that I have. And it just dawned on me the other day that I could pull up my tour dates on my website. And this is the first. First time I'll be doing this. So anytime you've heard me rattle off dates, it has been an ordeal for me and I don't appreciate that. Nobody has helped me with that and you just let me struggle.

[Tig Notaro]

That's right. Oh, oh. And people, check out season two of fubar that's streaming on Netflix right now.

[Fortune Feimster]

I play how dare you interrupt me?

[Tig Notaro]

I'm sorry.

[Fortune Feimster]

Pew.

[May Martin]

Pew.

[Fortune Feimster]

Pew.

[Tig Notaro]

Pew, Pew.

[Fortune Feimster]

I will be live and also in concert August 17th in West Hampton Beach, New York, and then August 23rd in Provincetown, Massachusetts. Two shows. First one is sold out and I have not checked on the second one in weeks. So for your sake, I hope there's some tickets left for the second show. Also, go to tignotaro.com for any largo or Dynasty Typewriter shows in Los Angeles. I think that's it. What about you, May?

[May Martin]

I think I don't have much going on, I think. Check out my. My Instagram. I've always got shows in LA at Largo and Dynasty Typewriter, but I think I'm just chilling out, so.

[Fortune Feimster]

Nothing wrong with that.

[May Martin]

Yeah. Check out Feel Good on Netflix. Or if you listen to music, you might like to listen to some of.

[Fortune Feimster]

Mine on some great tunes that may's got going on.

[Tig Notaro]

Thanks.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah. Every now and then something will pop up on Instagram and I'm like, that's a good tune.

[Tig Notaro]

Thank you.

[Fortune Feimster]

That is a good tune.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, I love that.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah, me too. Nothing wrong with hearing a good tune. And may you say you're not up to much, but pack up a drum set and go out into the middle of a golf course and.

[May Martin]

Yes.

[Fortune Feimster]

How fun does that sound?

[May Martin]

That sounds perfect to me.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah. Yeah. All right. Well, please subscribe to the podcast, the audio version, and YouTube and also send your favorite episodes to friends and loved ones and help us build this very handsome community. Until next time, what do you say? Let's keep it handsome.

[May Martin]

Handsome.

[Fortune Feimster]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

Handsome Handsome is hosted by me, May Martin, Tig Notaro and Fortune Feimster. The show is produced, recorded and edited by Thomas Willette. Email us at handsomepod at gmail com and please follow us on social media at Handsome Pod.

[Fortune Feimster]

What a podcast.

[May Martin]

What a podcast. That was a Headgum podcast.

[Tig Notaro]

Some people just know they could save hundreds on car insurance by checking Allstate first.

[Fortune Feimster]

Like, you know to check some shops for souvenirs before heading home from that big overseas trip. Don't forget to get a present for your pet sitter.

[Tig Notaro]

Checking first is smart, so check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Savings vary subject to terms, conditions, and availability. Allstate Fire and Casualty Insurance Company and Affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois.

[Fortune Feimster]

Hey, Gorg, it's me, Gottmik. And me, Violet Chachki. And we want you to listen to our podcast, no Gorge now on Headgum. Each episode, we will be bringing you vlogs, answering burning questions, discussing what's going.

[May Martin]

On right now, and diving into all.

[Fortune Feimster]

Things fashion, hookups, gossip, and more with past guests such as Heidi Klum and Dita Von Teese. No Gorge always keeps things hot. Listen to no Gorge on your favorite podcast app or watch full video episodes on YouTube New episodes every Thursday.

[Tig Notaro]

Bye, gorgeous.