Handsome Podcast Episode Summary
Episode: Pauline Chalamet Asks About Dangerous Situations
Date: September 23, 2025
Hosts: Tig Notaro, Fortune Feimster, Mae Martin
Special Guest: Pauline Chalamet
Main Theme:
Comedian and actress Pauline Chalamet asks the hosts to share stories of situations that seemed harmless or enjoyable at the time, but in hindsight turned out to be much more dangerous than they realized.
Episode Overview
This lighthearted yet thoughtful episode begins as usual with the hosts’ trademark riffing and playful camaraderie—including Fortune striking “sexy poses” in her hotel room and Mae updating everyone on her animal paintings book charity. The core of the episode is a deep dive into personal stories where each host (and Pauline) recounts a time they were unwittingly in danger, offering both humor and genuine reflection about risk-taking, naivete, and survival. Throughout, the hosts maintain their signature irreverence and warmth.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
Pre-Question Banter (02:00–32:00)
- Sexy Poses & Friendship:
The episode opens with Fortune posing on her hotel bed at the others’ coaxing, leading into a discussion about what’s actually sexy (“Grinning with wide eyes—it’s underused!” – Mae, 03:56). - Catchups:
- Mae has sold out her animal paintings book for charity (05:58).
- Tig is happy to be back in LA after months of travel, enjoying daily walks and routines with her wife, Stephanie (09:02).
- Fortune reminisces about her divorced parents, their post-divorce dynamic, and the bittersweetness of family history (15:19–17:15).
- Codependency & Relationships:
Mae details her parents' comically codependent but enduring marriage, describing their daily shared routine and reflecting on the fine line between codependence and healthy partnership (21:27–23:14). Tig and Fortune weigh in about their own experiences and understanding of codependency. - Mae's Upcoming Therapeutic Retreat:
Mae shares her plans to attend the Hoffman Institute, a six-day phone-free therapeutic program, and muses on her desire to temporarily escape screen time (25:14–28:01).
Listener Question: “Unexpectedly Dangerous Situations”
Pauline Chalamet’s Question (36:04–36:29):
“What is an experience that you've had where in the moment, you were really enjoying it and loving it… but in retrospect, you realized, oh, I was in a lot more danger than I thought I was?”
Hosts’ Stories
Tig Notaro: Swimming with Bull Sharks (41:16–45:17)
- Story: Tig recounts going with her assistant in Florida to swim with wild bull sharks, described as more aggressive than great whites, with no cage and raw chum thrown in the water.
- “While I was dangling in the water, I was in there for 30 minutes…and keeping eye contact with the sharks. And now I feel like I would know—even though I'd be terrified—if I was by myself in the ocean and a shark was coming towards me, I would know I need to not make any fast moves.” (43:24)
- Takeaway: At the time, Tig found it exhilarating and only fully grasped the sheer recklessness afterwards, especially when her wife reminded her of her responsibilities as a parent.
Fortune Feimster: Racing up Chichen Itza (46:09–49:38)
- Story: As a college student studying Mayan ruins, Fortune raced up the 91 steps of the pyramid at Chichen Itza in sweltering heat, reaching the top with blue lips, about to pass out from exhaustion and dehydration.
- “I came so close to just passing out off this giant pyramid. My professor said, 'Don't you ever do that again…you could have had a heart attack.'” (48:49)
- Takeaway: Fortune reflects that it seemed innocuous, but the physical risk was substantial and only clear in hindsight.
Mae Martin: Befriending an Uber Driver (51:07–59:23)
- Story: Mae tells of befriending an Uber driver in LA who shared a colorful past (ex-opium dealer, troubled teen school alum), exchanged numbers, and a month later, ended up (at 11 pm) inviting the same driver inside her house after a massage. He gave her a lengthy spontaneous spoken-word performance before leaving.
- “As I'm unlocking my door, I'm like, what am I doing?...He goes, 'You are 50% man, 50% woman,'...Then he stops by the gate, closes his eyes, and starts reciting this three-minute spoken word poem.” (56:01–58:22)
- Reflection: Mae realizes she tapped into her teenage self who said yes to every new person but admits, “I did afterwards…I thought that definitely was very dangerous.” (59:20)
Pauline Chalamet’s Own Story (62:33–63:33)
- Story: While hitchhiking solo across Turkey as a young adult, Pauline undertook daily long hikes in Cappadocia with no water, phone, or map, trusting only her sense of direction.
- “Only once I left did I realize that I would go out every day without any water, with no cell phone, and no map. Just an idea in my head of where I had come from and where I was going back.” (63:12)
- Reflection: Like the others, Pauline only recognized afterwards how vulnerable she was.
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
- On Fortuitous Reunions:
Mae: “I did spells. I think I might meet my wife soon…” (10:49)
(Moments later, a stranger passes outside—hijinks and concern ensue.) - On Codependency:
Mae, describing her parents’ routine:
“They spend the whole day sitting opposite each other at adjacent desks as if they work in an office together. Then…move to a third table…play Scrabble…drink white wine…have dinner…watch TV…bed.” (21:27) - On Tiger Parenting:
Tig: “I feel like such an annoying parent because I am so on Max and Finn about hydrating. 'Guys, come in. Have some water. Did you have water?'” (64:03) - Fortune’s Lesson:
“Math nerds out there…91 steps is 364; the top platform is the final step. Ergo, 365.” (50:19) - Mae’s Uber encounter:
“He goes, ‘Okay, give me your phone. I’ll text you right now.’ … We’re destined to be friends… Later, he stops at my gate, eyes closed, does this three-minute long, like, Eminem song worth of spoken word.” (52:01–58:20) - Pauline’s Self-Reflection:
“Once I left Turkey, I was like, oh… I was putting myself in grave danger. But in the moment, I thought, you know, I’m just going on a hike.” (63:25)
Timestamps for Important Segments
- 03:04 – Fortune does sexy poses on the bed
- 05:58 – Mae sells out charity book, faces daunting shipping task
- 21:27 – Mae describes her parents’ codependent daily routine
- 25:14 – Mae announces going to the Hoffman Institute
- 36:29 – Pauline Chalamet’s question is introduced
- 41:16 – Tig’s shark story begins
- 46:09 – Fortune’s Chichen Itza racing story
- 51:07 – Mae’s dangerous Uber friendship
- 62:33 – Pauline Chalamet’s answer/story
- 64:03 – Hydration & Parental Anxiety
- 67:19 – Plugs and wrap-up
Tone & Style
Throughout, the hosts maintain a conversational, confessional, and gently self-mocking tone, finding comic absurdity in their own youthful or impulsive risk-taking. There’s no preaching—just honest, warm storytelling and support.
For New Listeners
If you’ve never tuned in before, this episode is a perfect introduction to the "Handsome" ethos: honesty, self-deprecation, and the wisdom (sometimes) of lived experience—all laced with sharp wit and affection.
Quote:
Mae: “I’m just amazed that I’m alive, really…” (50:47)