Pretty Little Episode #27

Summary

Podcast Summary: Handsome – "Pretty Little" Episode #27

Release Date: February 21, 2025
Hosts: Tig Notaro, Fortune Feimster, Mae Martin
Podcast: Handsome by Headgum

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1. Opening Banter: Personal Quirks and Germaphobia (00:50 – 04:15)

The episode kicks off with the hosts engaging in lighthearted conversation about their personal habits and anxieties. Mae Martin shares her experience of sleeping with a hoodie up to stay warm in a hotel room, prompting Tig Notaro to relate by discussing her own tendencies to cover up in unfamiliar or uncomfortable environments.

Notable Quote:
May Martin (00:20): “I slept with a full hoodie on, snuggly in my pants. And a full hoodie. Very weird.”

The discussion naturally transitions into a conversation about germophobia. While Mae expresses specific pet-related aversions, Tig expands on her broader concerns about cleanliness and how the pandemic influenced her perspective on germs and safety protocols.

Notable Quote:
Tig Notaro (02:21): “I think that's the problem with germaphobes, is the imagination. That that is what. I'm way too visual.”

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2. Listener Question: Lessons Learned the Hard Way (08:50 – 17:32)

Question from Joey (08:50):
“What lesson have you had to learn the hard way? I'm a parent of two little kids that seem to have to learn all of the lessons the hard way. And I'm wondering, what did you have to learn the hard way?”

The hosts delve into personal reflections on challenging life lessons, particularly in relationships and personal growth.

• Tig Notaro discusses the importance of understanding what it takes to maintain healthy relationships, acknowledging her past shortcomings and the continuous journey of self-improvement.

  Notable Quote:
  Tig Notaro (10:18): “I immediately go to my previous relationships and how clueless I was as far as like, what it really takes to maintain a relationship.”

• May Martin shares her struggles with emotional availability and setting boundaries, highlighting the repetitive nature of learning these lessons.

  Notable Quote:
  May Martin (12:45): “I'm the exact same. Like, I think I thought that I had cr. Like, like, oh, I'm really attracted now to emotional availability and someone who just is, you know...”

• Fortune Feimster humorously interjects an advertisement segment, maintaining the podcast's signature blend of humor and sponsored content.

Tig also touches on financial responsibility, reflecting on her past negligence and the ongoing effort to manage finances more diligently.

Notable Quote:
Tig Notaro (16:47): “And as time has gone on, I've. I've been more like, I have to do this. I.”

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3. Listener Question: Comedy Material Swap (17:32 – 21:22)

Question from Taylor (17:32):
“Would you rather, for the rest of your career, have to perform another comedian's material or have another comedian have to perform your material? Bonus question: Who would be the comedian?”

The hosts engage in a playful debate over the hypothetical scenario of swapping comedic material.

• Tig Notaro admits that performing another comedian's material would feel inauthentic, expressing admiration for Maria Bamford’s versatile voice work.

  Notable Quote:
  Tig Notaro (18:35): “I would love to see Maria Bamford do my material.”

• May Martin contemplates impersonating beloved characters from "Saturday Night Live," like Molly Shannon's Mary Katherine Gallagher, acknowledging the challenge but also the fun it would entail.

  Notable Quote:
  May Martin (19:42): “It'd be super fun to do, like, some Molly Shannon characters or what.”

The conversation highlights their respect for fellow comedians and the difficulties inherent in adopting someone else's comedic style or material.

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4. Closing Remarks and Calls to Action (21:22 – 23:04)

As the episode wraps up, the hosts encourage listeners to submit their own questions and engage with their content through various platforms.

Notable Quote:
Tig Notaro (21:52): “Really good. Yeah, please keep it coming.”

They also share personal updates and promotional plugs, inviting fans to check out Tig’s new material and Mae’s upcoming music tour shows.

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Conclusion

In "Pretty Little" Episode #27 of Handsome, Tig Notaro, Fortune Feimster, and Mae Martin offer a blend of humor, personal anecdotes, and heartfelt reflections. From discussing the nuances of personal habits and germophobia to exploring the challenges of learning life’s tough lessons and the imaginary world of comedic material swaps, the hosts provide an engaging and relatable conversation. Notable quotes punctuate their discussions, offering listeners memorable insights and laughs. This episode is a testament to the hosts' chemistry and their ability to tackle diverse topics with both sincerity and wit.

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Connect with Handsome:
Submit your questions and follow the podcast on social media at Handsome Pod.

Transcript

[May Martin]

This is a Headgun podcast.

[Tig Notaro]

Some people just know they could save hundreds on car insurance by checking Allstate First.

[Fortune Feimster]

Like, you know how to check that You've got interesting conversational prompts prepared before hosting your book club's monthly meeting, or just plenty of tasty snacks if you haven't read the book.

[Tig Notaro]

Checking first is smart, so check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Savings vary, subject to terms, conditions, and availability. Allstate Fire and Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois.

[May Martin]

This is a Headgun podcast.

[Tig Notaro]

Pretty little episode.

[May Martin]

Welcome.

[Tig Notaro]

Hello. It is friend talking over.

[May Martin]

May Martin. Hello.

[Tig Notaro]

Hello. How are you, May?

[May Martin]

I'm well. How are you?

[Tig Notaro]

Doing well. Doing well. A little chilly, but doing well.

[May Martin]

Yeah, I slept in a hoodie last night in my bed, and I actually thought I should do that more often. Put the hood up. It was cold in my hotel room.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, you slept with your hoodie up?

[May Martin]

Yeah. Slept with a full hoodie on Snuggly in my pontes. And a full hoodie. Very weird.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, I've done that before. I think when I've been in hotel or motel rooms that I'm skeeved out about. Yeah, I'll sleep with my hoodie up.

[May Martin]

When you're worried about the blankets and stuff. Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Worried about everything.

[May Martin]

Right. You got a germ thing. You don't. Yeah, yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

You have no germ thing.

[May Martin]

I have specific things, like when dogs lick people's faces, that I'm like, I gotta go. I gotta leave the room.

[Tig Notaro]

Okay. So if you're dating somebody and they have a dog and the dog is, like, not just licking the face. What about licking the mouth?

[May Martin]

Oh, no, thank you. No. I have to draw the line there. Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

What about when the dog gets the tongue in the mouth? Like, in the mouth?

[May Martin]

I've done.

[Tig Notaro]

That's how I go through life. Okay.

[May Martin]

Oh. Having that feeling about everything.

[Tig Notaro]

Not everything, but, man, if I pull over to some gross motel, if I'm on the road and I'm tired, I'm like, this is the only thing. Okay. And then I'm just like, oh, gross. My imagination goes nuts. And I think that's the problem with germaphobes, is the imagination. That that is what. I'm way too visual.

[May Martin]

Yeah. And then also, it's reinforced by fact as well. It's like it's your imagination, but also probably if you took a, you know, a black light and shone it all over, it would be that.

[Tig Notaro]

And I would never do that.

[May Martin]

Right, right, right. Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Like anything, I already know it's there.

[May Martin]

And you're just trying to compartmentalize as much as you can. Yeah, yeah. Yes, I know. And then I have a couple of friends who have that feeling a lot. And then the pandemic kind of validated that, you know, was like. Yeah, these particles are. You know, you sneeze and it goes like 50ft and, you know.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. I don't know. For some reason, maybe it's that exposure therapy. But I was worried about when I had kids because of all the germs on them and crawling around on the floor and boogers and whatever.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

It actually launched me in a better direction of, like, because I love them so much, and I was just picking them up and snuggling all of their gross stuff on their body. That was helpful. And then. And then the pandemic. Not that it was easy for me, but it kind of was helpful in that I could see that through certain protocols I could maneuver.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

You know, to some degree. Obviously, you're not fully safe, but that.

[May Martin]

Does actually happen a lot where people who are really neurotic. Not that you. I'm not saying you are, but, like, then in an emergency, it's fine if.

[Tig Notaro]

You think I'm neurotic.

[May Martin]

I don't think you're neurotic. But they're like, in an emergency, they are suddenly like. I. You know, I worry about the apocalypse a lot, but I feel like if it came, I'd be. I'd spring into action and I wouldn't panic because I've thought about it so much.

[Tig Notaro]

Paint a picture of what the apocalypse looks like to you.

[May Martin]

It's like martial law. Like. Like, it's like it comes on the news. They say, guys, all bets are off. You know, there's a big meteor coming or there's zombies around. It's every man for himself. Good luck out there, guys. Find your loved ones. Get out of town if you can. And everyone's freaking out.

[Tig Notaro]

Wait. Just go to the next town and escape the apocalypse.

[May Martin]

I just recently ordered a survival kit online after the fires, I don't know. And it's like, it's got everything in it. Like a little one of those. Jar of peel butter lube. You know, the essentials, like a silver heating blanket. You know, those really crinkly y things like that. So I'll be good. I just. Just got to get a driver's license because on foot, I'm not getting far.

[Tig Notaro]

No, you're not. Yeah, we have an emergency. Go Bag. I probably need to revisit that. Yeah. And see if it's updated still. But we had gotten a cat carrier that is a backpack that has a little clear, little bubble on it so the cat can, like, look out. And, yeah, I put the backpack on and walked in and made a joke to Stephanie about, like, you know, I'm ready. Let's go. As if, like, all I need is just a kitty in my backpack. Out we go.

[May Martin]

I can't believe that you're someone who's. You've actually fought zombies in real life.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, in real life.

[May Martin]

I mean, in. In the opposite of real life. In a movie.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

And were you. Was it scary? Were there actors dressed as zombies running at you and then you had to run and were you scared?

[Tig Notaro]

There was only one scene, you know, because the movie army of the Dead is what it's called, was filmed without me. And then I was brought in to replace an actor that got in trouble for sexual assault. And so they green screened me into the movie. They meaning Zack Snyder, the director. And I was really just filming the whole movie by myself. But there's one moment it's an action film, and I'm just by myself. There is one moment when I'm flying the helicopter that an actor is in the helicopter with me, and I can't remember if he was actually dressed like. Like a zombie or if he was just, you know, turning into one, maybe.

[May Martin]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Or if it was already shot, like, right. You know, like, you don't really see him. I don't really know. I can't remember. It's been a few years, but fast.

[May Martin]

Zombies are some of my. My biggest fears.

[Tig Notaro]

Fast zombies.

[May Martin]

Yeah. Not the slow ones.

[Tig Notaro]

That's what that movie is, is fast. I know. Slow zombies. I mean, come on.

[May Martin]

Yeah. Just get in the car.

[Tig Notaro]

You're good. That's a problem. Yeah, yeah. Or even just walk away. You're fine.

[May Martin]

Walk away as fast. Do you think if I got canceled, you would be able to green screen, Go back over the handsome podcast and just green screen someone else in there?

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, we'd have to put Rosie O'Donnell in there or something, you know?

[May Martin]

Yeah, that's the natural replacement. Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

If you can't get Mae Martin, I guess you just get Rosie Donnell. Oh, look what just popped up on my. My thing is a cartoon version of me from that movie.

[May Martin]

There you are. That's amazing.

[Tig Notaro]

I haven't sorted through my photos yet. I just put all of my favorited photos. I uploaded all my favorited photos, but anyway.

[May Martin]

Oh, oh, to like your electronic picture frame thing.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, yeah.

[May Martin]

Oh, nice.

[Tig Notaro]

I haven't gone through and been like, yes, keep this. No, don't keep that. So certain things pop up that are.

[May Martin]

Like a picture of a receipt or something.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[May Martin]

Okay, let's hear our first question.

[Joey]

Hey there, handsomes and future Oscar hosts. My name is Joey and I come from the small town of Kamlaki, which is about three hours west of, of the big city of Toronto. And my question for you is, what lesson have you had to learn the hard way? I'm a parent of two little kids that seem to have to learn all of the lessons the hard way. And I'm wondering, what did you have to learn the hard way?

[Tig Notaro]

Hmm, that's a really good question.

[May Martin]

That's a really good question.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, I feel like I'm still learning things.

[May Martin]

Me too. And just when you think you've learned it, you haven't. I'm a slow learner. I guess. I'm learning the same things over and over.

[Fortune Feimster]

Some people just know they could save hundreds on car insurance by checking all state first.

[Tig Notaro]

Like you know how to check and make sure your 13 year old nephew is still into that children's cartoon before buying them that super cute themed bedspread that they would have loved 5 years ago.

[Fortune Feimster]

Checking first is smart. So check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate Savings. Vary subjects to terms, conditions and availability. Allstate Fire and Casualty Insurance Company and affiliate, Northbrook, Illinois.

[May Martin]

What about you learning it the hard way where you think like, oh, I got this. And then it's. Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

I immediately go to my previous relationships and how clueless I was as far as like, what it really takes to maintain a relationship.

[May Martin]

Right.

[Tig Notaro]

You know, obviously it's all those things that help you get to where you are. And I'm, I'm certain I fall short as a spouse here and there still, but when I really think about myself and how I handled things or what I was drawn to or what any. All of that stuff, it's like. And those are hard lessons. Those are really brutal lessons. But that's the only way you go, is to go through those.

[May Martin]

I know. And you might have to go through it again and again and maybe that's your journey. Yeah, yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Like, I mean, okay, that's reassuring to hear though. And being attracted to the same kind of people where you think, no way am I gonna be attracted to this again, or I am for sure gonna change this about myself. Because I'm getting in my way and whatever it is. And then. Yeah, and then it's. Yeah, if you, if you don't make those massive shifts and changes, then you're going to be in the same hard situation again and again and again.

[May Martin]

Yeah, I'm the exact same. Like, I think I thought that I had cr. Like, like, oh, I'm. I'm really attracted now to emotional availability and someone who just is, you know, and then, and then someone's not emotionally available and I'm right back to being like, but let me prove my worth. And like, like, instead of just knowing boundaries and I, I immediately revert back to like, I have to, you know, fix this. And like, I, I. And instead of meeting someone where they're at, it's like, I think that's. Yeah, yeah. That's like romantic relationships are the hardest. It's really. But then the rewards are so great if you can self regulate and then, but also not put people on a pedestal but like, see where they're at. The rewards are good. Right, Right. Is it worth it?

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, I find it to be worth it. And you know, even in my marriage and even though I try to be a really good spouse, I see myself fall short and fall into old lazy patterns and not appreciating things or Stephanie in ways that I should. Yeah. And I also don't want to paint a picture like I treat her terribly or anything like that, but just I have moments where I'm like, God, I am so. I remember hearing this song. Well, a very important song in our relationship is by the band. It makes no Difference, I think is the name of it.

[May Martin]

Yeah, it Makes no Difference.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, yeah. And, and I heard that, I don't know in the past few months and there wasn't even necessarily anything wrong in our relationship when I heard it. In fact, I would say everything was fine. But it brought me back to the very beginning of our relationship and that feeling of just getting together. And I thought that's probably a really good thing to do is have a, a little playlist of songs from the very beginning of the relationship. Yeah, yeah.

[May Martin]

That's a really good idea.

[Tig Notaro]

Really brought me back to. God, I'm lucky. I cannot snooze on these moments in life or like get lazy or, you know, I'm so lucky.

[May Martin]

I like that a lot. I also keep eating coconut oil by accident. That's another one. Keep learning that lesson is don't eat vegan baked goods because they all have coke. Even if the person working there says it Doesn't. If it's a vegan baked good, it's gonna have coconut sugar, coconut flour, coconut oil. Keep getting all red in my neck. I get. My neck gets all red and my stomach gets all weird. So I keep learning that lesson.

[Tig Notaro]

Let's hear Joey's answer.

[May Martin]

Yeah. I love the name Joey.

[Joey]

I had to learn about money, responsibility the hard way. While I was off in university, I had a loan, and I decided that I could use it for things like buying $80 seasons of sex and the City to watch with myself and my roommates. And those purchases quickly added up and my money quickly dwindled, so. So that was something that I had to make up for. And it was definitely learning about my money thriftiness the hard way. Thanks, handsomes.

[May Martin]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I feel like you're a financially responsible person, right? Does that come naturally to you?

[Tig Notaro]

I'm still figuring that out. You know, Like, I feel like I've been kind of open, free, generous, and then also, like, feeling like, wait a minute.

[May Martin]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Do I need to be doing all of this or that or whatever? Because you can end up overspending and then breaking your own back, and then you're like, what am I? This isn't what I want for myself. Like. Like, you have to check in and go, I don't. I'm. I'm not being responsible. I'm. I'm. Yeah, I'm. No, I have to shift things. And it's an ongoing process of, like, seeing where for myself. Of, like, wow, I. I shouldn't have done that, or I should have pulled back, or I should have not done that. I should have done that. You know, all of those things. I'm figuring it out. I. I mean, I was always the person that, you know, my electricity would get turned off, you know? Cause I forgot. I'd just throw a stack of bills on a table and.

[May Martin]

Yeah, bury your head naturally. Yeah. Okay, that's good. Yeah. Cause same.

[Tig Notaro]

I'm just. But it.

[May Martin]

It's.

[Tig Notaro]

As time has gone on, I've. I've been more like, I have to do this. I. I remember reading something once about, like, if. If something takes less than two minutes to do, just stop what you're doing and just take care of it. Right? Then as soon as it crosses your mind, go take care of it. And that's something that I'm. I'm finding really helpful. And whether it's just paying a bill or texting somebody back or, you know, I. I want to be a responsible adult and parent and spouse And I continue to mess up.

[May Martin]

Should we hear another one?

[Tig Notaro]

Let's do it.

[Taylor]

Hi, handsome. This is Taylor from Buffalo, New York.

[Tig Notaro]

Go Bills.

[Taylor]

And I want to know, would you rather, for the rest of your career, have to perform another comedian's material or have another comedian have to perform your material? Bonus question. Who would be the comedian? Thanks. Love the show.

[May Martin]

Wow, that's so good. So in the second scenario, am I still allowed to do comedy, but they just also do my comedy? This person first. I'm thinking, who's. Whose material would I want to do? There's so many people, but I. I don't think I'd be good at it. But who would you want to do? Like, I would. If I tried to do your material, I'd feel like a fraud. It would be like. I mean, it would be so fun, though, because I love the material, so it'd be great to like. But it would be more like acting. I'd be basically doing a tig impersonation. Because you're a cadence, wouldn't you be.

[Tig Notaro]

A fraud about everyone? You know, like, if you. With everyone.

[May Martin]

If you like, imagine trying to do Maria Bamford's material and all the voices.

[Tig Notaro]

That's immediately who I went to in my mind.

[May Martin]

Yeah, me too. Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

And would I have to do it with her voice? With the.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. And is it just. Does it just become, like, who are your favorite comedians? You know?

[May Martin]

Right, right.

[Tig Notaro]

And.

[May Martin]

And then who would you like to see do your material?

[Tig Notaro]

I mean, I would love to see Maria Bamford do my material.

[May Martin]

Yeah, I'd pay to see that.

[Tig Notaro]

That would be a really fun thing to see because she does so many voices. Yeah. I guess that's what I would choose, is to see Maria Bamford do my. I mean. Yeah. And then it would be so fun to do hers, just because it's like. I mean, you can kind of feel like you're in someone's head when you're listening to them do it. But if you're actually performing, feels a little more like, oh, this is. This is all for me.

[May Martin]

I'd like to do some of those. Some of my favorite SNL characters. Like, does it have to be stand up? Because it'd be super fun to do, like, some Molly Shannon characters or what.

[Tig Notaro]

Molly Shannon character, like Mary Kathryn Gallagher.

[Fortune Feimster]

Or.

[May Martin]

The hosts of the radio show who talk really quietly with the Onagastire. That would be super fun. It would be fun to do some wacky characters that are outside of my general.

[Tig Notaro]

Like, yeah, oh, my God. I do characters at home. Yeah, Like a top secret, weird thing that just Stephanie gets to experience.

[May Martin]

I love that. That's the best characters that you've inventioned.

[Tig Notaro]

No. Or just impressions of people or. Yeah, characters. Anywhere between the two. And then she is incredible at impersonating random friends of mine or people in my life that aren't even known. And we'll sit around and I'll call out a different person's name and she'll imitate them, and it just destroys me. And I've had her do it in front of other people that don't even know who these people are, and they still die laughing at her impression.

[May Martin]

I like when you impersonate Max and Finn, because it's like.

[Tig Notaro]

That'S Finn. Max is more like, everybody get your pinkies out. We're going to do a pinky swear. Oh, God. And then Finn's like, we should probably go to bed now. It's getting late.

[May Martin]

Yeah, I love that.

[Tig Notaro]

There you have it. Handsome little listeners, if you want, submit your questions. Not if you want. We demand that you submit your questions and [e-mail] HandsomePod we absolutely love hearing from you all. And I feel like, no offense to our celebrity friends, but I feel like our listeners submit some of the best questions.

[May Martin]

I agree. Really get you from behind. Yes, completely agree. Completely. Keep them coming.

[Tig Notaro]

Really good. Yeah, please keep it coming. Check out. I'll be doing new material. Check out either Largo or Dynasty typewriter in LA. What about you? Me?

[May Martin]

Check maymartinmusic.com I got. I've got four big music tour shows I would love to see you at.

[Tig Notaro]

Until next time, I guess. Keep it pretty.

[May Martin]

Handsome Handsome is hosted by me, May Martin, Tig Notaro and Fortune Feimster. The show is produced, recorded and edited by Thomas Willette. Email [e-mail] and please follow us on social media at. Handsome Pod.

[Tig Notaro]

What a podcast.

[Joey]

Pod.

[Taylor]

What a podcast.

[May Martin]

That was a Headgum podcast. That was a Headgum podcast.

[Tig Notaro]

Some people just know they could save hundreds on car insurance by checking Allstate first.

[Fortune Feimster]

Like, you know, to check and make sure you really get a solid hook into that drywall before you hang that heavy art frame that was an heirloom from your grandmother.

[Tig Notaro]

Checking first is smart, so check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Savings vary subject to terms, conditions, and availability. Allstate Fire and Casualty Insurance Company and Affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois.