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A
This is a Headgum podcast.
B
Some people just know they could save hundreds on car insurance by checking Allstate First.
C
Like, you know, to check that you preheated your oven before throwing in that frozen pizza. A high starting temperature ensures you get a nice crispy crust.
B
Checking first is smart, so check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Savings vary, subject to terms, conditions, and availability. Allstate Fire and Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois. Pretty Little episode. Welcome to the Handsome Pods Pretty Little episode. I'm Fortune Feamster.
A
I'm Mae Martin. Hello.
B
And may I have to say, you're looking pretty handsome.
A
Oh, thanks. The tank top is referring to the tank.
B
Yeah. Because you. You told us in another episode that you rocked one of those on stage, and I assumed you did that all the time. You said you do not. And now you're rocking it with us today, and we're all going wild.
A
People are losing their minds. By people, I mean you and Thomas. I don't. It's hot today, and I. I didn't have time to change, and I'm. I'm just seeing how it feels, how it affects my personality. I'm going to try and wear it a lot this summer.
B
You look tough.
A
Really?
B
Yeah.
A
You scared?
B
No. I mean, in a good way.
A
Yeah. It makes me want to get more tattoos. Like.
B
Oh, really?
A
Really go the whole hog.
B
And let's see your. Let's see your one tat over here. This one.
A
Oh, I got what it. That's like, some years. Like, I got.
B
Okay.
A
A 12 in 2012. 16 in 2016. And a 22 and 22.
B
Okay. Yeah. Are you thinking of, like, on the arm or something?
A
Well, I'm running out of real estate Fortune, but I'm thinking about, like, back of the arm, like, on the tricep or maybe. I don't know.
B
Okay.
A
Around my belly button. A big, Like, a face where the belly button's the mouth.
B
No, don't do that.
A
No, no, I'm just kidding.
B
I'm too much of a wuss to get a tat.
A
Yeah. You're not good with. With pain.
B
With pain, yeah.
A
Do you have pierced ears? I sure do.
B
I got these when I was 18.
A
I think that's worse than a tattoo. Really? Well, it depends.
B
Yeah, I'm glad I got them pierced because I had to wear the clip ons for a sketch the other week. And. Owie.
A
Yeah, my mom wore clip ons growing up. I always remember she had ones Fur on them like furry clip ons? Yeah, that's. So did you. Is that why you got your ears pierced? Because you were tired of wearing those clip on?
B
Yeah, they just didn't want my ears always hurting. And I was like. I think that the piercing would be a much easier road if you got.
A
A little nose stud. It would change your whole life.
B
One of these. I not really looking for that. I'm not really. Jags has one, but.
A
Oh, really? Like a little.
B
Yeah, a little stud.
A
Yeah.
B
I just was never. I'm just simple. I'm a simple Galway.
A
You're a simple guy. You're wearing a really good T shirt.
B
Asheville Shout out to Asheville, North Carolina.
A
It says 10, 000 lesbians can't be wrong.
B
That's right. Someone gave me this shirt when I was in Asheville. Not this time of the last. I think it means that there are this many lesbians in Asheville. I don't know if that's an exact number. And they love it. And they can't be wrong for living there.
A
I'm just quickly googling population of Asheville because I want to know what percentage we're talking.
B
Because. Because when they do the census, are they asking people if they're lesbians?
A
Well, that's what I want to know. So the.
B
I don't think so. Right.
A
Population's only like a hundred thousand. So that's 10%.
B
That's a lot of lesbians in one area.
A
Wait, but don't they say 10% of people in general are gay?
B
So, you know, I don't know the stats.
A
I just. On the stats.
B
I just joke that the lesbians in Nashville are, you know, on the mountain somewhere. And when someone comes to town, that is some representation. The bat signal goes out.
A
Yeah.
B
And they just hook carabiners to each other and make it down the mountain.
A
I haven't heard the word carabiners in a while.
B
Yeah. You know, it's a good old camping tool and a nice keychain.
A
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I bet if they. If on the. If they included bi curious people, it'd be. We'd be up to 40,000.
B
I feel like there are more. More ladies I think are becoming curious these days, don't you think?
A
I think that's because of stigma. I think they just feel safer to say it. I think it's the same for men or women probably. Yeah.
B
Okay.
A
For sure. Think about the army, the navy, ancient Greece.
B
Think about it.
A
Jail. Just think.
B
I just think women are getting exasperated.
A
Yeah.
B
By a certain age by men. Not all. Hashtag not all. But they're just like. Well, maybe it would be nice to have a lady tell me I'm pretty and, you know, want to hold my hand.
A
Yeah, that does seem to happen more than, like, men getting to, like, 45 and being like, I just want to hang out with another guy.
B
Like, you know, I would really use as a nice cuddle from my bro friend.
A
Yeah.
B
Yeah. They're not as open to that.
A
Yeah, they should be.
B
But ladies are. Ladies are a little more fluid.
A
Why don't. You know how I always play spin the bottle at parties?
B
Yeah.
A
I always instigated. I've never. You've never been at a party where I haven't.
B
I don't get invited to spin the bottle parties, weirdly enough.
A
You're gonna. But especially when I.
B
Especially in my married days, I didn't get invited.
A
You guys left before the. The chaos.
B
No one. No one wanted the married couple at the spin the bottle party.
A
But I always notice when I. When I introduce spin the bottle, it's always the straight guys that are so excited to have an excuse to kiss each other. They're really so into it. Well, if they're. If they're nice.
B
If I must kiss this strong, bearded man.
A
Yeah. They're going in for round two. They're.
B
Wow.
A
Yeah.
B
Okay. Well, you get people just feeling loose, I guess.
A
Right, Right, right, right. Thomas came over today to fix my tech.
B
How did it. Did it work out?
A
It worked out great. And it was nice to have a little visit. And we played foosball, and it was good.
B
Well, I was hoping y' all got some foosball, then. May kick my ass two games in a row. May's pretty good. From what I hear. They're pretty good.
A
That's just because I own a table, so I play a lot. But I didn't realize that Thomas plays pinball, like, a lot. And so that's. I'm thinking I might go to the pinball place and start to dip my toe in, because there's tournaments and stuff. Something I could really immerse myself in, get really obsessed.
B
You might end up buying your own pinball machine at some point.
A
It's a matter of time until. Pinball machine. Photo booth would be great.
B
Yeah.
A
That was expensive, though. A vintage photo booth, and it break all the time.
B
I think that someone should make a handsome pinball machine. How cool would that be?
A
Oh, my God. And it goes, like, into our mouths.
B
And to our mouths. Yeah.
A
Oh, my God. And at one point, you get the Most points if the ball goes up and it goes between two boobs and gets motorboated.
B
That's right. There's. So there. There would be a lot of references in there. Pineapples, ghost.
A
Yeah.
B
Aunties.
A
That would be great.
B
I mean many put. Put it on the list. So many things I saw.
A
There's already a. I don't know if it was someone like our people that did like the. The handsome Monopoly game because we talked about it.
B
Oh yeah.
A
That was great.
B
Autumn put that together.
A
Yeah, that was hilarious.
B
Yeah, it's always. They're always doing some fun things on that. Our socials. It's so. It's such a treat to see the things that Autumn comes up with. Yeah.
A
Fortune. How are you? That was so weird.
B
How are you?
A
I mean, how are you? And also how are you?
B
I'm great.
A
How's your morning been? Are you having another like crazy day where you're just.
B
No. Yesterday was insane. I literally did not stop from 8am until 10pm like not a second. Today has been much better. I got to swim today, so that's always a sign of a good day.
A
Yeah. Nice.
B
And I'm going on a dinner date with my good friend Zach Noi Towers.
A
Oh, nice.
B
Which you guys gotta meet at some point. He's delightful.
A
I'd love to meet him. He's. This is. He's like a sweet, gentle, sweet, gentle.
B
Gay stand up comic.
A
Yeah, I'd love to meet him.
B
But also like very sex positive and very like is non monogamous and proud of it and will always be. And so it's fun to hear his stories of being out gallivanting around town.
A
Get him to the spin the bottle party.
B
He would soar at this party. May. Yeah, y' all would be good wing people for each other.
A
We. One time I was at a party, I mean in my 20s I was, you know, a lot crazier, but I was at a party at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival with Brett Goldstein and a bunch of British comics. And I was so drunk. But we instigated a game where basically one person would get unfolded and lie on a bed and then one by one we would kiss them. And there were maybe like 15 people playing.
B
What?
A
And then they had to say who the best.
B
Who the best kisser was.
A
What number.
B
Like real kisses.
A
Yeah. And it was always Brett. And I think that that's partly because they felt his beard and they knew who it was and they just wanted to. I think that was part of it.
B
But also they just were hoping that he would Want to go on a date?
A
Yeah. Yeah.
B
Brett is a handsome man. That is for sure.
A
He really is.
B
But he probably is also a good kisser.
A
He is a good kisser. He's a great kisser.
B
This came as wild. What? I am living such a boring life.
A
It felt very high school, though. Very like. And there was definitely a moment, like, there's always a moment where kind of you step back and are like, what are we doing? We should. This is weird. We should stop this. You're like.
B
After all, 15 people kissed each other. We were like, what are we doing?
A
Ye. Yeah.
B
Well, listen, I. Live your best life. Do your thing. That's what I say. You're having a good time.
A
Well, I was. I gotta bring some of that back.
B
You do. You need to get back into that energy.
A
Yeah. Instead of, like, retreating to the woods.
B
Don't do that. To do my paintings when you need to refresh, but. And also enjoy life.
A
Yeah.
B
Yeah.
A
Should we hear some questions?
B
Let's do it.
A
Yeah.
D
Hello, handsomes. My name is Caroline. Sending you a question from Omaha, Nebraska. My question for you is, when you were growing up or present day, is there a game that you and your friends or family play when everybody's together, like, back in town? It could be a board game, a card game, any kind of game. And do you love that you guys are always doing that activity or not so much. Can't wait to hear your answers.
A
We just talked about a game that's less of the kids.
B
That's not a family game for sure.
A
Yeah.
B
What about don't do that game? Don't do the smooching game with your fam.
A
No.
B
You strike me as someone that would have a game, family.
A
Oh, yeah. It's like how we connect, I think. I mean, how we talk, how we connect, the four of us.
C
Some people just know they could save hundreds on car insurance by checking Allstate first.
B
Like, you know, to check that you've got your phone set to do not disturb before heading to bed before the night. Nobody wants to be woken up by a spam call at 5 in the morning.
C
Checking first is smart. So check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds of. You're in good hands with Allstate Savings vary subject to terms, conditions and availability. Allstate Fire and Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois.
A
My. My mom and dad play every day at 4pm they play scrabble and cribbage and. Oh, wow, like, for two hours they play games, but we play poker as a family. Now, and. And they just annihilate us. So we play poker, and there's a lot of trash talk, but growing up, the only thing I can think of is that was pretty weird, was my grandma's husband. And my grandma died when I was really little. So I was. I would have been like, two when this happened. But I remember it that he was a carpenter, and so he invented this club that was like the loon club or something. And he would carve these little badges with, like, birds on them. And so me and my brother, I was like, two. My brother's six. And we were like, how do we get in this club, basically? And he was like, I don't know. You know, it's not for kids and stuff. And. But what it was, was you had to walk around the perimeter of the cottage at night by yourself. That's what I mean. They were just messing with us. Yeah, but that was like, how you get in the club. And I remember being two and it was snowing, and I went out in. And I was 2. I was like, was anyone watching me? And I walked around in the woods. Around the house.
B
That is a young age. Just gallivanting around in the snow.
A
Yeah. Around the house at night. They were probably watching.
B
Yeah.
A
What about you?
B
My family was not a big game family. We were more of a sporty family.
A
Right.
B
So we would play tennis together, soccer outside, or throw catch or play catch, whatever.
A
Would you. Are you and your brother competitive with each other? None of us.
B
I mean, we like to win, but none of us would get so crazy where, like, you know, you hear these stories of people and families, like, having crazy outbursts. Like, it was never like that. We're. Yeah, we, like, want to win, but we would be chill, too. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
A
I'm pretty chill about losing and stuff. I know that my parents, because they play every day, it's like, for sure, there have been moments where it's put a strain. Like, my mom's convinced that my dad has this crazy luck. And she's like, it's not fair because he has this saying, luck. So with Scrabble, which is not a luck game, but she's like, it is a luck game because of the. The letters that you choose. And he always gets, like, the Y, and she gets stuck with, like, shitty letter, like a V or whatever. So now at the beginning of the game, they divide up. They make sure they have an equal number of, like, vowels and stuff. Like, which kind of takes out a lot of the fun of the game. But it's they make sure they have an equal chance.
B
I mean, I guess if it keeps peace in the home.
A
I think it does. That was instigated because I think there. I think there was a moment where someone ripped the board in half.
B
Oh, no.
A
Yeah. Semi ironically, but yeah.
B
Yeah. How funny. There are some families that just love games. That's their love language. They're like, let's sit down and play a board game.
A
Yeah.
B
Let's hear Caroline's answer.
A
Let's.
D
My answer would be maybe there's a name for this game. All I know is that my grandma taught us and used to play with us. It's similar to solitaire. Everybody playing has their own deck of cards, but you can play on each other's aces in the middle of the table. So it becomes kind of like a race to get through and see if you can finish your solitaire game and get your cards up when the opportunity arises on the aces. I hope that makes sense. I love your show. Thanks so much.
A
Yeah, we called that Spit in Toronto. We called it Spit. And it was. It was really intense. We played it at school a lot. It gets super fast and. Yeah, Yeah, I like a fast game.
B
I've played this game with some friends with dice, and someone has to keep score, but you need someone that knows the rules because there are different things. It's called Farkle.
A
Farkle.
B
Yeah.
A
Love it. I probably shouldn't learn more games because I. I really have to learn to socialize without them. Like, at my house, I'm really anything. Yeah, you're right. Actually, it. Yeah. Yeah. Let's hear another question.
B
Yeah.
A
Hi, handsomes. This is Annie and Anna. We are a married couple in New York City, and we have been huge.
B
Fans of the podcast since the beginning. Our question is, have you ever secretly.
A
Had a favorite when you knew you kind of shouldn't?
B
Like a favorite child or pet or.
A
Sibling or friend or colleague?
B
Thanks so much. Anna and Anna are a married couple.
A
That's amazing.
B
They're married, right?
A
Yeah. It sounded like one of them was eating at the same time as talking or maybe they were hooking up.
B
And what if they both went into this as Anna and then one of them was like, you're gonna need to.
A
You're gonna need.
B
You're gonna need to tweak this. You're gonna be Anna.
A
That would be such a top move to be like, you change your name.
B
A favorite, anything. I always would make my grandmother tell me I. Who her favorite grandchild was.
A
And it was you.
B
It was me, mate. And I got it on video. Oh, my God. I was about 16 years old, and my grandmother. It was at my brother's graduation party, and I had this video camera because I really wanted to scratch it. I wanted to stick it to him on his graduation. I had a. I had one of those old school video cameras. And you know how my accent was back then. Nana, hi. Hi, Nana. I need to ask you a question. Like, it was real country.
A
Oh, my God.
B
I have it somewhere. I think I put it on a dvd. And I said, hi, Nana. Who's your favorite grandchild? And she, like, looked around side to side and then pointed at me, and.
A
I was like, yeah.
B
Oh, my God. God. And it was my proudest achievement in all of life. And then when I did the Tyler Henry medium thing.
A
Yeah.
B
My grandmother came through, and guess what he said? She said that I was her favorite.
A
And wait, didn't he also. Because I watched it. Didn't he also, like, point at you? He was like.
B
Or no, no, remember? I got to actually go back and watch it. I never went back. I think you need to watch it a second time to pick up on other stuff. But he said. She was like, you're my favorite.
A
That's crazy.
B
And I called my. One of my brothers, and I said, ha, ha. You see that? And I rubbed it in his face again.
A
Okay, I feel like we're getting an answer to the question. Were you competitive with your brother? Literally his deceased grandparent. You're calling them up to rub salt.
B
In the water, and she's been dead 27 years, and I'm still, like, in your face.
A
That's so funny.
B
But I don't know. Do I have. Do you have a favorite? Anything that you're not supposed to say is your favorite?
A
I don't think so.
B
Well, we don't have kids.
A
No. But even when I'm around kids, I, I. It's. Even though even the annoying ones, I just. I think they're magic. So I'm. I mean, I guess I would have favorites of my friends, kids and stuff. I had two cats growing up, and I guess I did have a favorite because only one of them would let me pick her up. Yeah. But that's just because very early my parents said, that one's yours and that one's your brother's. So then I bonded with the one they said was mine.
B
Yeah, for sure. You feeling like kids are magic? Do you think you want to have kids one day or you don't know?
A
I want kids in my life. I want to. Yeah. I Think I want to be a parent. I don't really care how it happens. It could be someone else's kid who I meet. It could be adopted. It could be foster kids. It could be any kids.
B
Yeah.
A
But I want to, like, be a safe place for a kid, you know?
B
Oh, well, you'd be very good at it. You're. You have that fun imagination and, like, you like, hanging. Hanging with kids and being creative and doing that kind of fun stuff.
A
Thanks, man.
B
Yeah. Yeah.
A
You got nieces and nephews and stuff, right?
B
Yeah, but we're 3,000 miles away. I got. I got nephews that were 3,000 miles away since they were basically born. So I see them, you know, when I can, but it definitely is like, hey, what's up? Hey, kid.
A
How you doing?
B
What up, kid?
A
Yeah, what's your deal?
B
I'll be like, you want to, like, you know, like, let's go see the movie?
A
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
B
But, yeah, when they were really little, I was far away, so.
A
Yeah, that's tough.
B
But, I mean, you know, listen, my dog Biggie's always my favorite of everything.
A
Yeah. That counts if you. But do you think if you got a puppy at the same time as Biggie?
B
I think Biggie would still win.
A
I think you're right.
B
I think he's just there, you know, that, like, soul dog, those soul dogs they talk about.
A
Yeah. You were meant to know him.
B
I know. I haven't seen him in a while, which is hard, but we'll figure it out.
A
Super hard.
B
But, yeah, he's just a special boy, so it would be hard for anyone to compete with him.
A
I think I love him more than the cat I had as a child, so.
B
I know. I hope. I think he'll be back in soon and he'll pop. You know, get here on my desk and sleep during one of our tapings.
A
Yes, please.
B
Hasn't that has been sad, not having his little sweet face Go.
A
Yeah, I missed the pan over to him just unconscious.
B
Oh, those were the days. Now he's a product of divorce.
A
Well, should we hear Annie and Anna's answer?
B
Yeah.
A
Our answer is that we obviously love all three of you so much, but not equally. Oh, we are enormous fans of Tig and May. But our favorite is Fortune. We love you, Fortune.
B
And also Tig and May. Wow. Okay.
A
I know it felt to be your brother.
B
I didn't see that coming.
A
Holy.
B
Well, I know for a fact, based on our live shows and all the posters that show up in the audience, you are many people's favorites.
A
So so are you, though. That is. You know, what is it? I mean, that is very funny. And I. I. Of course people have favorites, but the craziest thing is when people come up to you in person and tell you that one of the other two is their favorite. Like, that has happened to me so many times being like, yeah, I didn't know who you were, but, you know, that's hilarious. Always been my favorite. Like, yeah.
B
I get asked a lot if you're single and really. And they talk about having a crush on you.
A
Okay. You got to tell them to pre. If they ever meet me to pretend they don't know who I am and to be really aloof.
B
And that'll do it.
A
That'll do it. Yeah.
B
I don't want to lose.
A
I don't know. I don't want to loof, either. I'm joking.
B
Loofah is not for me. I don't know. As soon as someone's just, like, trying to act too cool or, like, play games, I'm like, no, thanks. Not that I'm, you know, in that space, but, like, I'm just.
A
Yeah.
B
Yeah. I just, like, just be a real person.
A
I like, kind of messy, intense people. Like, yeah.
B
Like, kind, sweet.
A
Yeah. Sorry. I mean, me too.
B
I don't want to have to beg for someone's affection or love.
A
No way, man. No chasing.
B
No chasing.
A
Yeah.
B
Yeah. Well, what a fun little, little episode.
A
Always a pleasure. Please keep submitting your questions. Go to speakpipe.com handsomepod yeah, we love hearing from you.
B
We sure do. I keep saying for people to ask us advice. We still don't get that.
A
Yeah, please ask us advice, guys.
B
We're so good at giving advice. And no one. Everyone's like, we're good. We just want to ask you a question.
A
I mean, would you say our personal lives are to be.
B
To be shambles?
A
Yeah. To be replicated.
B
Like, we don't need advice from you guys. That. Yeah, we're kind of going through it right now.
A
Yeah. They're like, well, we have had a.
B
Lot of episodes this summer of all of us crying.
A
Yeah. We really have. Yeah.
B
Yeah. That is. You know, it's so funny because we. For the longest time, we're, like, so ridiculous and silly, and lately we've just been, like, crying with each other.
A
I know. I know. We.
B
There's nothing wrong. Nothing wrong with that. But it's just, you know, I guess we just cover all the. All the emotions on this pod.
A
Yeah. Well, keep sending the. The dumb questions then, as well.
B
Yeah.
A
Not. Not just heavy life advice.
B
That's right.
A
I got nothing really coming up. I'm, I'm, I'm taking it easy. But my. I'm gearing up for the release of Wayward. It's coming out in September. And yeah, check out my music and stand up and stuff. What about you?
B
Yeah, just I'm in Spokane, that great outdoors comedy festival. And then September gets real busy. A lot of like, Houston and San Antonio. And I got some fun big theaters coming in like Chicago, Boston, D.C. so get your tickets.
A
Yeah, I guess in the meantime.
B
Yeah, just keep it pretty.
A
Handsome Handsome is hosted by me, May Martin, Tig Notaro and Fortune Feimster. The show is produced, recorded and edited by Thomas Willette. Email us@handsomepodmail.com and please follow us on social media. ANSOMEPOD what a podcast. What a podcast. That was a headgum podcast.
B
Some people just know they can save hundreds on car insurance by checking Allstate First.
C
Mike, you know to check that when you're at the grocery store, you buy proportional amounts of salsa. If you get a big bag of chips, make sure you get a big tub of salsa to go with it.
B
Checking first is smart, so check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Savings vary, subject to terms, conditions and availability. Allstate Fire and Casualty Insurance Company and Affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois.
Release Date: August 22, 2025
Hosts: Tig Notaro, Fortune Feimster, Mae Martin
Producer: Thomas Willette
This episode of Handsome is as delightfully meandering and intimate as ever, featuring comedic hosts Fortune Feimster and Mae Martin (Tig Notaro absent this episode), who riff on personal expression (tattoos, tank tops), identity, queer culture, and the games that define family and friendship. As always, they answer questions from listeners—including some married superfans—balancing wit, vulnerability, and playfulness.
The chemistry between Fortune and Mae is easygoing, vulnerable, and raucous, capturing the joy of queer friendship, family quirks, and listener connection. The episode balances light banter—about body art, camping tools as lesbian accessories, and pinball fantasies—with authentic emotional beats about family rituals, the complexity of favorites, and the evolving identity of their show. Regular fans will appreciate the callbacks, while new listeners will find welcome, realness, and plenty of laughs.
Want to join in?
Submit a question at speakpipe.com/handsomepod and follow them on socials @handsomepod.