Pretty Little Episode #54

Summary

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Handsome Podcast: Pretty Little Episode #54

Date: August 29, 2025
Hosts: Tig Notaro, Mae Martin (Fortune Feimster not present in this episode)
Theme: Listeners' questions spark heartfelt and humorous conversations about grief, parasocial relationships with artists, family routines, and reconnecting with joy after loss.

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Episode Overview

In this "pretty little episode," Tig and Mae share candid reflections on grief and the power of art to foster connections—both real and imagined. Responding to thoughtful listener questions, they discuss the intimacy of parasocial relationships, childhood routines (like doing the dishes), and the delight in simple acts of silliness and self-care. Amidst playful banter, personal anecdotes, and their trademark humor, the hosts cultivate a welcoming space for laughter as well as vulnerability.

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Key Discussion Points

1. Theme Song & Technical Hiccups (00:51–01:06)

• Mae and Tig joke about Tig not being able to hear the theme song, setting a light, bantering tone for the episode.
  • Mae: "It's so weird that I am the one that can't hear it, but either way, welcome to a pretty little episode." (01:06)

2. Reflections on Grief and Legacy (02:01–04:28)

• Grieving Andrea's Passing
  • Tig discusses the waves of grief after losing their friend Andrea, and the heaviness it sometimes brings.
    • "As grief goes, it goes up and down and sideways, and I definitely feel, like, a heaviness in my chest today." — Tig (02:27)
  • Both hosts are moved by the strong listener response to a recent episode about Andrea and the afterlife, with many sharing tears and a renewed appreciation for Andrea’s poetry.
    • "So many people were saying that they were crying and that they were then doing a deep dive into Andrea's work." — Mae (02:54)
    • "All are welcome on the bandwagon…let's get more eyes on." — Mae (03:46)
    • "How great that Andrea's poetry is just spreading like wildfire." — Tig (03:51)
• The Personal Connection to Artists
  • Mae reflects on how art forms bonds with people you've never met, sharing how she commemorated Elliott Smith's birthday, despite never having known him.

3. Everyday Life Updates & Humor (04:28–09:17)

• Mae shares her plans for a Lake Arrowhead vacation, brainstorming ways to actually "unplug" and relax:
  • Plans to stock up on groceries, set up painting and music stations, and experiment with a phone-locking box.
  • "I bought this box that you lock your phone in for, like, five hours..." — Mae (07:29)
  • Tries a Dr. Joe Dispenza sleep meditation, sleeps ten hours for the first time in ages, jokes about being "subliminally messaged."
    • "I honestly feel great." — Mae (08:09)
• Tig recounts a Dodgers charity event, sharing a sweet story about her kids' reactions to meeting the players.
  • "Finn... saw a ghost the whole night... but he talks incessantly... just shut down a little bit." — Tig (09:45–10:17)
• Mae relays a funny anecdote from friend Sabrina about her son’s midnight emotional outburst.
  • "He goes, I thought you were offending me. That's so good." — Mae (11:12)
• Memorable quote: "The reaction to thinking someone is offending you is to go and cry hard and loud." — Mae (11:23)

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Audience Questions Segment

4. Parasocial Relationships: Feeling Friends with People You’ve Never Met (12:18–17:36)

Listener Question from Anna (12:18): "Is there anyone real or fictional that you've never met, but you feel like you're friends with them, and if so, who are they and how have they impacted your life?"

• Tig: Relates this idea to Andrea, referencing the intimacy people feel with her poetry and art.
  • "I feel like everyone that has gotten into Andrea feels like they know Andrea so deeply." — Tig (12:36)
• Mae: Jokes about wanting to be pals with "Mr. Christ" (Jesus), then admits to feeling an imaginary friendship with comedian Benito Skinner.
  • "I'd like to think I'd get along with JC. I'd like to think he would be..." — Mae (13:36)
  • "I've met [Benito Skinner] maybe once, but in my mind, we were good friends because I just love his material." — Mae (14:14)
• Tig: Shares a story about briefly meeting Anderson Cooper in a green room and feeling like they could be friends. Looks forward to being on his podcast.
  • "I really, really enjoyed following his news stories... I'm just really familiar with him.” — Tig (15:49)
• Mae: Reflects on being nervous to meet Sarah Silverman, whose reaction was playfully underwhelming but led to real friendship.
  • "I start telling some long anecdote... halfway through, she goes, 'I'm sorry, I wasn't listening to any of that.' I was like, awesome. But now we're pals." — Mae (16:35)
• Listener Anna's Answer (17:36):
  • Anna shares how she feels connected to the hosts themselves, having listened through life milestones like pregnancy, sleepless nights, and tough days.
    • "You've joined me... on many walks, being very pregnant in the heat of Texas... on some sleepless nights with a little infant..." — Anna (17:41)
• Hosts react warmly, expressing surprise and gratitude at the long-term connection listeners feel to the podcast.
  • "It's such a fun thing too, to get into the silliness. But then again, our listeners allowing us to flip over to the grief." — Tig (18:31)
  • "It's like a long-term relationship... people really have been through..." — Mae (18:52)

---

5. Family Dishes Routine: Clean Up or Let Them Sit? (19:29–23:15)

Listener Question from Kristin (19:29): "Did you grow up in a 'dishes done after dinner' kind of family, or more a 'let them sit' kind of thing? And what are you now?"

• Tig: Grew up in a "dishes done immediately" family. Still prefers to get it done, but isn't as fast as her wife Stephanie, who attacks dirty dishes with immediate gusto. Enjoys helping with cleanup at parties.

  • "If something is really stuck on a pan or a dish, I like for it to soak." — Tig (20:03)

• Mae: More casual—dishes sometimes sit for a couple of hours, but not left too long. Growing up, it was a stricter "dishes done" rule.

  • "I'm pretty untidy, but I'm not like, filthy... but growing up, it was dishes done after dinner for sure." — Mae (21:33)

• Tig: Suggests they should sell personal items (like Mae’s stack of outgrown clothes) on the show’s website for charity.

  • "We should have personal items for sale from Handsome." — Tig (22:22)
  • "I think the first thing I'd sell is that panda in Mae's house." — Tig (22:50)

• Mae: Office has become a “dumping ground for stuff”—relatable and funny.

• Listener Kristin’s Answer (23:16):

  • Grew up with dishes done after dinner, now admits to letting them sit, saying, "I think my parents would be moderately mortified at just how much of a Let them sit person I have become."

---

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• "As grief goes, it goes up and down and sideways..." — Tig (02:27)
• "All are welcome on the bandwagon... let's get more eyes on." — Mae (03:46)
• "I will buy a flute, of course. Why wouldn't you be playing the flute?" — Tig (04:44)
• "I kept inviting people up [to Lake Arrowhead], and... I feel like I should be doing stuff all the time." — Mae (05:48)
• "I bought this box that you lock your phone in for, like, five hours..." — Mae (07:29)
• "I thought you were offending me." — Mae quoting Sabrina’s son (11:12)
• "I'd like to think I'd get along with JC. I'd like to think he would be..." — Mae (13:36)
• "Have you heard that before, Thomas? Mr. Christ." — Tig (13:51)
• "I'm just really familiar with him." — Tig on Anderson Cooper (15:49)
• "She goes, 'I'm sorry, I wasn't listening to any of that.' I was like, awesome. That's great. But it was perfect." — Mae on Sarah Silverman (16:04)
• "You all have joined me through many a time in my life." — Anna, Listener (17:41)
• "We should have personal items for sale from Handsome." — Tig (22:22)

---

Timestamps of Key Segments

• Grief and Andrea’s Legacy: 02:01–04:28
• Mae’s Vacation Plans & Self-Care: 04:28–09:17
• Dodgers Story & Family Anecdotes: 09:17–11:12
• Listener Q1 – Parasocial Relationships: 12:18–17:36
• Listener Q2 – Dishes at Home: 19:29–23:38

---

Closing

• The hosts encourage listeners to send in more advice and personal questions.
• Both promote upcoming live shows (Los Angeles, Toronto, Biloxi, Largo), and Tig urges continuing to share Andrea Gibson’s poetry.
  • "Just keep deep diving into Andrea Gibson's poetry and tell your friends. Share one of your favorite episodes of Handsome with somebody that you think will enjoy this." — Tig (24:15)
  • "Check out my social media and I'm at Largo at the end of the month." — Mae (24:38)

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Summary

Episode 54 is a blend of gentle humor and heartfelt connection, moving seamlessly from life's heaviness to laughter and back. The hosts field listener questions that prompt rich discussions about missing friends, feeling close to people we've never met, the comfort of long-time companions (real or fictional), and the family quirks that shape us. There's warmth, vulnerability, lots of laughs— and a running invitation for listeners to move from passive observers to active contributors, making the Handsome podcast as much a community as it is a weekly show.

Transcript

[May Martin]

This is a headgum podcast.

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[May Martin]

Friends on the handsome part. Chatting with friends on the handsome pond. Pretty little episode. Well, here we are. Tig. You didn't hear the.

[Tig Notaro]

No, you didn't.

[May Martin]

You didn't hear it again?

[Tig Notaro]

No, I don't hear the.

[May Martin]

The theme song.

[Tig Notaro]

No, no.

[May Martin]

Man, it's some. It's. Something's up.

[Tig Notaro]

Is it still as good as I remember?

[May Martin]

In fact, better. Better than ever.

[Tig Notaro]

It's so weird that I am the one that can't hear it, but either way, welcome to a pretty little episode.

[May Martin]

Welcome. You're looking very pretty.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, thank you. I. I told you I had to take a shower because. Well, because I. I like to clean myself, but our hot water has been out every day, and our handyman has to crawl into our attic and put some coat into our hot water heater. I don't know what's going on, but.

[May Martin]

Like, the fact that we are so advanced in our technology and yet you got a guy crawling up in your attic for sure.

[Tig Notaro]

And it is insane when you think of, like, water in its natural state on the planet and that some guy is crawling into my attic with a code.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

You know, it's. It's so weird.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

It's so bizarre.

[May Martin]

But you look clean.

[Tig Notaro]

I am clean. I'm back in Los Angeles. You know, I was just telling Thomas before this episode, it was so nice to see all of the incredible response to the Kristen Schall episode where we talked about the afterlife, and it basically turned into a tribute to Andrea and.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

I don't know. Today's August 7th that we're recording.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

And it's been a few weeks since Andrea passed, and I have to say, I'm. You know, as grief goes, it goes up and down and sideways, and I definitely feel, like, a heaviness in my chest today.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Of that. Like, God, it's. It's. You know, as far as this lifetime, it's. It's done.

[May Martin]

It's so not linear. Grief. That's. Yeah, that. But the reaction blew me away, like, so Many people were saying that they were crying and that they were then doing a deep dive into Andrea's work. And that's. Yeah, I cried again listening to it. Like, yes. Yeah. It was really nice.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. I just find comfort. And, you know, I know that a lot of people, when they know of an artist, they kind of have that pride of, they were mine or I knew them in the beginning and sometimes. And I actually haven't seen this with Andrea, but I know that sometimes people feel like, oh, sure, jump on the bandwagon in the end, or. And it's like, I just.

[May Martin]

All are welcome on the bandwagon. And it's like, for sure, let's get more eyes on.

[Tig Notaro]

I mean, how great that Andrea's poetry is just spreading like wildfire. So anyway, that's very comforting, but it's. Yeah, it sneaks up.

[May Martin]

But you're right, it is funny when someone. When someone's art really speaks to you and you feel. I mean, I, like, shared a thing on. It was Elliot Smith's birthday yesterday, and I shared a thing like, happy birthday, Elliot Smith. I'm like, I didn't know this man, but, like, it feels so personal to me.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

And I just want people to think about Elliot Smith on his birthday, you know?

[Tig Notaro]

Absolutely.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, I get it.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

But how are you doing?

[May Martin]

I'm well, thanks. I'm. I went to the gym this morning. I've been playing a lot of foosball. I'm like, I thought you were going to say flute. Like, oh, my God. Don't tempt me.

[Tig Notaro]

I will buy a flute, of course. Why wouldn't you be playing the flute?

[May Martin]

I. I wouldn't be that shocked. I. I'm going to order one. Can we put that on the list? Thomas, a flute solo.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, my God. It would only make sense for me to tell somebody that May has picked up the flute. And I just picture you in your backyard, fluting around.

[May Martin]

Fluting to the menagerie of animals, like the. I saw the possum last night. The big boy. Oh, my God, he's so big and beautiful.

[Tig Notaro]

Well, you know, in country music, the possum is the singer. George Jones.

[May Martin]

No.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

Okay. That's what I gotta learn to woo the possum.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. Yeah. You should check out George Jones.

[May Martin]

I will. The thing with possums is they're so cute from the front when they're all nervous. And then you see that tail and you think, I'm not so sure.

[Tig Notaro]

You're a rat.

[May Martin]

You're a big rat.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. Yeah. But Wait, you're. You're doing well, but you've been.

[May Martin]

I'm, like, gearing up for this vacation in Lake Arrowhead.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

But I'm having a really hard time, like, turning my brain off and wondering if I'm going to be able to actually chill. I'm like. I keep inviting people up there, and I keep. I don't know, I feel like I should be doing stuff all the time. So I'm going to really try and.

[Tig Notaro]

Walk me through what your plan is exactly.

[May Martin]

Okay. Get up there, go to the grocery store, stock the fridge with healthy goods.

[Tig Notaro]

And what is healthy goods? And we're talking. Are we talking Diet Cokes? Marble lights? Yeah, yeah.

[May Martin]

You know, Frozen chicken fingers? Yeah, no, I'm going to try and cook and stuff. I have a barbecue, so I was going to do, like, salmon burgers and veggie burgers. I'm not going to do beef while I'm up there and, you know, eggs and stuff. What do people eat? What?

[Tig Notaro]

You know, I don't know. I don't know. I'm just. You know, what? I. You don't have to eat. What are eating? I'm just curious. What are you gonna do? So you're gonna go to the grocery store? You're gonna get some healthy food?

[May Martin]

Yeah, I'm gonna set up, like, a painting station, set up a music station. I'm gonna. Yeah, just, like, swim and hike. And there's. There's a place that's, like. I want to say it's like Santa's village or something in Lake Arrowhead. It's like. It's for children.

[Tig Notaro]

Should you be telling people that Santa's village is up there?

[May Martin]

He lives there, up in the.

[Tig Notaro]

Wow.

[May Martin]

But they got all kinds of, like, ziplining, and I love an activity. I'm gonna. I'm gonna do some activities.

[Tig Notaro]

Wasn't there something where you're gonna, like, unplug?

[May Martin]

There was something about that.

[Tig Notaro]

And that idea has unplugged.

[May Martin]

Well, I have. I bought this box that you lock your phone in for, like, five hours or as long as you want. And you can't get it out for that amount of time, I guess, unless you have a hammer. Uh, so I'm gonna. Yeah, I'll try and do that. Last night, I put on Dr. Joe Dispenza hypnotism. Before I went to bed. I just. It was like a sleep thing. I was asleep in five minutes, and then it played through the night. I forgot to, like, I don't know, set up my Spotify so it would Stop playing. So I woke up 10 hours later and I've been subliminally messaged in my mind all night like the world supports me. I am safe, I'm healthy, and I honestly feel great.

[Tig Notaro]

Go back. You said you slept 10 hours.

[May Martin]

Yes, which I never do. I fell asleep 11:30. I woke up 9:30.

[Tig Notaro]

Wow.

[May Martin]

I would recommend it to Dr. Joe Dispenza. Okay, I'm scared if I Google him, he's like canceled or something.

[Tig Notaro]

But, well, if he gets you to sleep, you know, I mean, that's how desperate I am for sleep. I kind of don't care what's whispered in my ears.

[May Martin]

Are you still waking up? Crack a dawn.

[Tig Notaro]

Well, I'm back on California time for a few days. And so this morning. When did I wake up? Yeah, I guess kind of still. I mean, I woke up at 5:30 here, which is 4:30 in Colorado or. No, Colorado's later. No. So 5:30. So I guess I woke up 6:30. We were out. We went out last night because we can't. We came back. Our whole family did. Max and Finn, Stephanie's dad. I did a benefit for the Dodgers catcher.

[May Martin]

Okay.

[Tig Notaro]

And not for him, but he has this. It's called catching hope. And it's for, you know, kids less fortunate and. And Max and Finn got to meet the Dodgers.

[May Martin]

Oh, my God.

[Tig Notaro]

Yes. All of the big stars were there and whoa. It was really, really cute.

[May Martin]

Did they have like, some questions for the Dodgers or were they too shy?

[Tig Notaro]

Well, that's. I mean, Max was a little like. He's. He was. He was fine. Finn was like. He saw a ghost the whole night. He was like. And one of the players said, what are you shy? And Finn nodded yes. And we were like, that is hilarious. Finn talks incessantly. He knows all the stats of the entire team. He. You know what I mean? Like, he just.

[May Martin]

Yeah, it was just shut down a little bit.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, it was really.

[May Martin]

He knew that about himself. He's like, yeah, I'm shy.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, that's what this is.

[May Martin]

I had, you know, our mutual friend Sabrina Juliece. So she. I mean, this is her story. But it cracked me out that last night her. Her kid, who's 7, woke. He's been taking it, just going in the middle of the night and waking them both up and being like, hey, what's up? And so last night he woke them up and he was like, can I get in bed? And they were like, wolfie, we gotta start. Like, go back to your own bed. So he goes back to his own bed. And then they just hear him, like, crying, like, really? And he never. So Sabrina goes in. She's like, what's up? He's like, I just. I don't know. I want a hug and a kiss. And she's like, okay. And then he goes to bed. And then in the morning, she was like, hey, what was all that about last night? Why were you so upset? And he goes, I thought you were offending me. Yeah, I thought you were offending me. That's so good.

[Tig Notaro]

What did he mean by that exactly?

[May Martin]

Who knows? Maybe he felt rejected. And so he was like, oh, you don't want to hug me, but I.

[Tig Notaro]

Thought you were offending me. That's so cute.

[May Martin]

The reaction to thinking someone is offending you is to go and cry hard and loud.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

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[May Martin]

Well, she. Listen, should we get some questions from the audience?

[Tig Notaro]

I think we should.

[May Martin]

That was weird.

[Tig Notaro]

Well, it's our. It's our listener audience.

[May Martin]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Right?

[May Martin]

Yeah. Yeah, you're right.

[Anna (Listener)]

Hi, handsomes. This is Anna from Texas. My question is, is there anyone real or fictional that you've never met, but you feel like you're friends with them, and if so, who are they and how have they impacted your life?

[Tig Notaro]

Gosh, that's kind of perfect on the heels of talking about Andrea, because I feel like everyone that has gotten into Andrea feels like they know Andrea so deeply.

[May Martin]

Very much. Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

That ties into what we were saying, that, like, parasocial relationship, I guess, of like.

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Or.

[May Martin]

Yeah. And just people that, you know. I mean, maybe you've had this experience I have where, like, yeah, there's people you admire, comedians you admire, and you think we're aligned, and then you meet them and you are, and you become friends.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. Or you meet people and you're like, whoa, whoa. We are not aligned.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

So the question is somebody you know or.

[May Martin]

Or someone you've never met that you think you'd be friends with, you're certain you'd be.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, I thought she said somebody you do know. Or you don't know, like a celebrity.

[May Martin]

Or someone who you think real or fictional.

[Tig Notaro]

I see a real or fictional person. Okay.

[May Martin]

Fictional is interesting.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

I'd like to think I'd get along with jc. I'd like to think he would be.

[Tig Notaro]

You know, meaning Mr. Christ.

[May Martin]

Mr. Christ would be receptive to me, I think.

[Tig Notaro]

And God, I've never thought of calling him Mr. Christ.

[May Martin]

Me neither. And I love it.

[Tig Notaro]

I think I'm gonna, I'm. Have you heard that before, Thomas? Mr. Christ.

[May Martin]

No. That's a first for me. I like it.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah. I think I just cracked something open with that Mr. Christ. So you really feel like you would.

[May Martin]

Well, isn't that his whole thing?

[Tig Notaro]

I don't know. I, I, I'm not a, I don't really follow Mr. Christ much.

[May Martin]

I, I imagine him as profoundly kind. So I, I think, I think we'd chat. But I, Okay. More recently, I. Cause I've been watching Overcompensating with Benito Skinner. Do you know him? He's a really funny comedian. And, and I, I've met him maybe once, but in my mind, we were good friends because I just love his material. I listen to his podcast.

[Tig Notaro]

O.

[May Martin]

That we weren't like close friends. And then I saw him at Just for Laughs in Montreal and I was like, hey, what's up? He was like, hi. But I really feel like he's just.

[Tig Notaro]

So funny and so did you talk more to him and, and get a vibe either way?

[May Martin]

The, the best vibe. Yeah, we didn't talk for long, but we have so many mutual friends too, so I'm, I'm like really creepily trying to muscle in there, but, you know.

[Tig Notaro]

I had a, I had an experience. It's funny that this question came up because the person I'm about to mention, I was just invited on his podcast when I go to New York next week or whenever. Yeah, next week. Anderson Cooper.

[May Martin]

Oh, no.

[Tig Notaro]

I was, I was on a late night talk show with him once or he had just taped his episode. Well, whatever. Our, our dressing rooms were across the hall from each other and, and I saw him just sitting in his dressing room and I just, I walked in, I was like, hey. I mean, I mainly just really liked him and wanted to say hi.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

But I, I did feel like, oh, right, we don't know each other. But I really, really enjoyed following his news stories and, and has it turned.

[May Martin]

Into a friendship or.

[Tig Notaro]

No, I've never met him other than that. It just was kind of that moment of, oh, right. I'm just really familiar with him. And he's just waiting to go on and tape this episode. And we just had a very brief hello and that was the end of that. And. And so I'm very much looking forward to going on his podcast. But he's definitely somebody that I've listened to a lot.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Over the years.

[May Martin]

That's a good answer.

[Tig Notaro]

And. And for. And for some reason, not everyone that you listen to a lot, you feel that total connection with.

[May Martin]

Yeah. Or even like someone like Paul McCartney, who I admire so much. I'm like, I'd rather just have a quick hello. I. I'm not sure that we'd become fast friends, and then that would be disappointing to me. But there's people that. You're like, we have a similar sense. Yeah. Like, well, I was. I felt very nervous to meet Sarah Silverman because I was like, I really think we'd get along, like. And I was like, I want this to go well. And I was at Largo. I was with Brett Goldstein. And after the show we went up and he was like, oh, this is May. And we're chatting. Then I start telling this story. I don't know, I was nervous. I start telling some long anecdote and she's kind of listening. And then about halfway through, she goes, I'm sorry, I wasn't listening to any of that. I was like, awesome. That's great. But it was perfect. And then now, of course, we're pals. Let's hear Anna's answer.

[Anna (Listener)]

My answer is obvious. It is all of y'.

[Tig Notaro]

All.

[Anna (Listener)]

I started listening when you only had three episodes out, and I've listened to every episode since then. You all have joined me through many a time in my life. I started listening while I was pregnant with my first and only son. So you've joined me on many walks, being very pregnant in the heat of Texas. You've joined me on some sleepless nights with a little infant. You joined me on some sad, bummed out drives back to work, some family road trips, all kinds of stuff. I just really appreciate the silliness and the joy. We all need it so much. I look forward to it every week. Thanks, guys.

[Tig Notaro]

That's so nice to hear.

[May Martin]

Thanks, Anna.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, really nice to hear because it is such a fun thing too, to get into the silliness. But then again, our listeners allowing us to flip over to the grief, you know, and to.

[May Martin]

I've never had. You've had podcasts for. But I've never had, like, it's like a long term relationship, like, where people really have been through. Yeah, I had that. I was a big fan of my favorite murder. I don't think I've ever met those two, but I felt like they were my pals. Yeah. Yeah, man.

[Tig Notaro]

There's nobody sillier than Karen Kilgarith, right? Nobody. She is a silly, silly person.

[May Martin]

That's amazing.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, you know, just to go back. Also, Eddie Van Halen. I think when I was a kid, I was like, oh, man, we would be tight.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

Should we hear one more?

[Tig Notaro]

Absolutely.

[Kristin (Listener)]

Hi, handsomes. This is Kristin from Vermont. Sitting here in my own kitty city on a Sunday afternoon, I've been trying to get some chores done. And that has been what made me think of my question. Did you grow up in a dishes done after dinner and before bed kind of family, or was it more of a let them sit until whenever you're ready kind of thing? And second followup is. And what are you now? Is it the same? Is it different? Super curious to know.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, that's a good question.

[May Martin]

Yeah. What's your what?

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, my house was dishes done right after. Yeah, I would say I live in a house that is now currently dishes done right after eating. However, I might take a beat longer than Stephanie. Like, I like to. If. If something is really stuck on a pan or a dish, I like for it to soak.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

Stephanie gets like, as soon as the food is in her mouth, everything's over to the. The sink, and she's immediately scrubbing whatever cheese or sauce or sweating scrubbing, just like getting it off and getting it done. And I really that. But I don't think she appreciates, you know, the half hour to hour I take before I'm like. But at other times, like when we have dinner parties or something, I am all about heading over there and doing. Whether it's my dishes or your dishes or if I'm at someone else's house, I'm more than happy to get in there and get to it.

[May Martin]

Have you ever been at a dinner party where, like, something. There's something said during the dinner party, and then at the end of the dinner party, like, one person goes to do the dishes and someone else kind of comes and follows and you're like, what was that about? Why did they say that at the, like, there's a nice moment in the kitchen where you can take a break from the dinner party?

[Tig Notaro]

Yes. Yeah, I do enjoy a dinner party break.

[May Martin]

Yeah. I'm pretty untidy, but I'm not like, filthy. But I. I definitely will forget and leave it sometimes if Next to the sink or in the sink, but maybe a couple hours, and then. And then load the dishwasher. But growing up, it was dishes done after dinner for sure.

[Tig Notaro]

Now, speaking of tidy, my eyes are terrible. What is that black lump with the white thing on top?

[May Martin]

That's a panda. No, that's. That's a pile of clothes that I'm selling. Okay. I have, like, a bunch of clothes that I want to get rid of. And. And so my roommate Matt, I said if he's. If he wants to sell them, he could keep the cash. I just don't. I don't want to.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, my God. I just had a great idea.

[May Martin]

What?

[Tig Notaro]

On our website, we should have personal items for sale from Handsome.

[May Martin]

Yeah. And the person.

[Tig Notaro]

And we list them.

[May Martin]

Charity.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah.

[May Martin]

Yeah. I mean, I got a lot of things like this crystals I could, you know, part with. For sure.

[Tig Notaro]

All right, Thomas, can we do personal items for sale from Handsome?

[May Martin]

For sure.

[Tig Notaro]

Oh, my God. That'll be so funny.

[May Martin]

What are you gonna sell, Tig?

[Tig Notaro]

I think the first thing I'd sell is that panda in. In Mace house.

[May Martin]

He's not bothering anyone.

[Tig Notaro]

No, honestly, you could have convinced me that was a panda. I cannot see anything.

[May Martin]

My office has kind of become like the dumping ground for. For stuff I don't know what to do with. But.

[Tig Notaro]

Same.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Tig Notaro]

All right, well, let's hear Kristen's dish routine.

[May Martin]

Yeah.

[Kristin (Listener)]

For me, I definitely grew up in a dishes done after dinner and before bed kind of family. And I think my parents would be moderately mortified at just how much of a Let them sit person I have become as I've moved into my own adulthood. So thank you so much, and love you guys. Keep it Handsome.

[May Martin]

Thank you so much for sending your questions. Please keep sending them to speakpipe.com handsomepod as always, we are bewildered that no one is asking for advice. No one wants us to weigh in about their love lives, their careers, but feel free. Yeah. What do you have coming up, Tig?

[Tig Notaro]

Well, I have a bunch of local shows in Los Angeles and some in Toronto. September 27th, I will be in Biloxi, Mississippi, at Beau Rivage Resort and casino. Go to tignotaro.com for all show and ticket information. And, yeah, just keep deep diving into Andrea Gibson's poetry and tell your friends. Share one of your favorite episodes of Handsome with somebody that you think will enjoy this. I don't know.

[May Martin]

Whatever this is.

[Tig Notaro]

Yeah, whatever this show is.

[May Martin]

Yeah, I've got. I always have, like, local Los Angeles shows that I forget to plug, so check out my social media and I'm I'm at Largo at the end of the month. I'm not sure the date yet, but yeah, I'm always doing shows in la.

[Tig Notaro]

Love it.

[May Martin]

Well, love it.

[Tig Notaro]

Till next time.

[May Martin]

Keep it.

[Tig Notaro]

Keep it pretty. Handsome Handsome is hosted by me, Fortune.

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Feimster, Tig Notaro, and May Martin. The show is produced, recorded and edited by Thomas Wuellette. Email [e-mail] and follow us on social media. ANSOMEPOD what a podcast.

[May Martin]

What a podcast. That was a headgum podcast.

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