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Tig Notaro
You know what's smart? Checking Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds on car insurance. You know, it's not smart not checking to see if it's trivia night at your local bar. You just wanted to get a bite to eat with a friend, but now you're invested in doing whatever it takes to win a $20 gift certificate by naming as many state capitals as you can.
Allstate Announcer
Yeah, checking first is smart. So check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds.
Stephanie
You.
Allstate Announcer
You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings vary subject to terms, conditions, and availability. Allstate North American Insurance Company and affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois.
May Martin
This is a Headgun podcast.
Chatting with friends on the Handsome Pod. Chatting with friends on the Handsome Pod. Pretty little episode.
Allstate Announcer
May.
Tig Notaro
Well, first of all, welcome to the pretty little episode.
May Martin
Yeah.
Tig Notaro
I'm Tig Notaro, and you're May, right?
May Martin
Yeah. Yeah.
Tig Notaro
Okay, let's skip past all that. What was. What was that?
May Martin
I mean, I wasn't expecting such a response, and I'm thrilled by it because it's electrically. I'm holding a banana peel. A classic comedy prop.
Tig Notaro
Yeah.
May Martin
I ate the banana before we started recording, and now I'm revealing the detritus.
Tig Notaro
Oh, it's so funny what you did.
May Martin
You thought the little dance, it was like.
Tig Notaro
Yes, I did. Of course I did. Have you ever slipped on a banana peel?
May Martin
No.
Tig Notaro
Do you know anyone that has ever slipped on a banana peel?
May Martin
It must have been a thing at some point, right? But I would think in the olden days, bananas were pretty hard to come by, pretty rare. So I don't know when that started. The banana peels.
Tig Notaro
Have I blown your mind with this information yet?
May Martin
What?
Tig Notaro
Bananas are berries.
May Martin
Stop.
Tig Notaro
What do you mean, bananas are berries?
May Martin
There's no way.
Tig Notaro
Okay, look at the shape and the. Google that up.
May Martin
I mean, I want to.
Thomas Willette
Incorrect, Tig.
Tig Notaro
Bananas or berries?
May Martin
Really? But.
Tig Notaro
And you know what isn't a berry? A BlackBerry.
May Martin
What is happening?
Tig Notaro
Thomas, will you Google that up?
May Martin
Can I blow your mind?
Tig Notaro
Always. Every day that I see you.
May Martin
Pumpkin's a fruit.
Tig Notaro
Oh, of course.
May Martin
Oh, I didn't know that.
Pumpkin's a fruit. Wow. So banana's a berry. I guess it grows in bunches. I don't know what the qualities of a berry are.
Tig Notaro
There's seeds inside.
May Martin
Are there banana seeds?
Tig Notaro
Yeah.
May Martin
Huh.
Tig Notaro
There should be.
May Martin
I think I've been getting some weird bananas. What I know about bananas is a lot of people die every year picking them. It's a very dangerous job. Coconuts Fall on your head and it's a.
Tig Notaro
Well. And you could slip on them.
May Martin
Yeah. You could slip on those peels. And there's black widow spiders that live in the bunches, you know.
Tig Notaro
Oh, my gosh. Be careful out there, Thomas. Are blackberries berries?
Thomas Willette
It seems like they're not technically berries.
Tig Notaro
Thank you. Thank you. Okay. And bananas are.
Allstate Announcer
Yes.
Tig Notaro
Okay.
May Martin
So nuts.
Tig Notaro
I know. No, not nuts. Berries. Yeah. One of my favorite snacks that I eat almost every day is peanut butter on a banana and peanut butter on a honey crisp apple.
May Martin
Oh, that's good.
Tig Notaro
It's so good.
May Martin
That's. Yeah. Peanut butter and bananas. A. I. I'll do a sandwich, like.
Tig Notaro
Oh, yeah.
May Martin
Toast, peanut butter, banana and honey drizzled.
Tig Notaro
Yeah.
May Martin
Yeah. Come on.
Tig Notaro
Because you don't care.
May Martin
I don't give a.
Tig Notaro
You don't. And I can tell. Yeah. I dare you to keep doing that.
May Martin
Yeah.
Tig Notaro
Do you like peanut butter on an apple?
May Martin
Yeah, I like peanut butter on most things. Yeah.
Tig Notaro
Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's not a bad food to eat. It is delicious.
May Martin
I wonder who started peanut butter.
Tig Notaro
I don't know. Thomas, can you let us know?
May Martin
Have we gone? I feel like we just went. I feel like we just finally found Thomas's line. Like, we went too far in asking him to Google who invented peanut butter. Oh, here we go. Marcellus Gilmore Edson was a Canadian chemist. A Canadian chemist and pharmacist. In 1884, he patented a way to make peanut paste. An early version of peanut butter. Oh. But the ancient Incas and Aztecs also ground peanuts into a paste centuries earlier, of course.
Tig Notaro
Okay, so truth comes out.
May Martin
Yeah. You can't just patent something and then say you invented it.
Tig Notaro
Right. Speaking of Canadians, I mean, this might blow your mind. I wish fortune was here to witness it. But I know that Katy Perry is dating Trudeau.
May Martin
You do? Because that's huge. Yeah.
Tig Notaro
Yeah.
May Martin
They made their first public appearance, Right?
Tig Notaro
Yeah. Yeah. Do you think that, like, did their marriages dissolve because they met type thing or girl.
May Martin
I'm going to weigh in. I'm going to say that they know. I think both their marriages had been on the rocks for a while, but it does seem pretty quick. The. Or is it. I don't know. When Orlando.
Tig Notaro
I don't know. But like. Or were they keeping an eye on each other from a distance and, like, their dream boat became free and they're like, hello, I love you so. And your legacy will be great.
May Martin
I mean, when I look at them together, it makes sense. It works for me. I hope it lasts. I want to Hear what song she writes about him. I don't know.
Tig Notaro
What do you hope it lasts? No offense to either of them. I don't care. I don't care if it lasts. If they broke up while we were talking, I don't wish anyone ill will. I'm not embarrassed.
May Martin
It doesn't affect it at all.
Tig Notaro
Yeah.
May Martin
I gotta be honest. Neither am I. I'm not that embarrass best.
Listener (Indira or Rhiannon)
Yeah.
May Martin
But God love them.
Tig Notaro
Yeah. And God does love them. God loves them both. They're children of the Lord.
May Martin
Yeah. Yeah. Who else is dating that we. That we know of. That's new and exciting.
Tig Notaro
Let's see who is dating.
May Martin
Oh, Thomas is typing. Maybe he's going to reveal. Oh. Sophie Turner and Chris Martin.
Tig Notaro
Martin.
May Martin
Sophie Turner from Game of Thrones and Chris Martin from Coldplay.
Tig Notaro
How'd you hear this? Thomas?
May Martin
Yeah. Why is Thomas.
Thomas Willette
It just came up, you know, in my news feed.
May Martin
Yeah.
Tig Notaro
While we were talking about it. Or, girl, were you googling hot goss.
Thomas Willette
You know what? I think I heard about Justin Trudeau and Katy Perry, and then I started kind of down a celebrity rabbit hole because of that a couple days ago.
May Martin
Well, I feel like as the weather gets colder, people start coupling up. People start wanting to stay in. They want to. Feeling a little lonely.
Tig Notaro
Yeah.
May Martin
It does add an element of pressure when both people and a couple are in the limelight. Right. Like, or when it would be a news story for them to break up or date. Or, like, do you ever think about. Have you guys ever been the subject of, like, a headline, you and Stephanie?
Tig Notaro
Well, didn't I tell you? This isn't a headline. But didn't I tell you when I went on, I don't know what I was on. Must have been social media or something. But this thing popped up that said, are you involved in a May December relationship? And the picture was me and Stephanie.
May Martin
No. No.
Tig Notaro
Yeah.
May Martin
And so a May December is like an older.
Tig Notaro
Yeah.
May Martin
No way.
Tig Notaro
Yeah.
May Martin
Like, with an age gap relationship. Oh, my God.
Tig Notaro
Or maybe that's what they said, an age gap relationship. And it was me and Stephanie in the picture.
May Martin
Insane.
Tig Notaro
I can send it to you.
May Martin
Yeah.
Tig Notaro
I was like, this is hilarious.
May Martin
Did you send it to Stephanie?
Tig Notaro
I did.
May Martin
Yeah, of course. What's. So what's the age gap?
Tig Notaro
Me and Stephanie.
May Martin
Yeah.
Tig Notaro
Is it 10, 15 years?
May Martin
Fifteen years, yeah.
Tig Notaro
Yeah. Yeah. Have we been in a headline? I mean, other than just like, we're celebrating an anniversary or. Yeah, we had babies or got married or, you know, any of that stuff. We're not really.
May Martin
It is weird. Like, the parasocial relationships people have. Like, I feel. I feel connected to some celebrities I've never met. I like to think of myself as being very aware that I don't actually know these people. But then you see someone out and you're like, yeah, I know this person intimately. Well, like, I remember hearing David Schwimmer's voice. I was in a restaurant, I heard his voice, and my. I. I wanted to walk up to him because I was like, I know this guy.
Tig Notaro
Like that.
May Martin
No, you. But you don't. You can.
Tig Notaro
Yeah. Even if you met them.
May Martin
Yeah.
Tig Notaro
A time or two. You know, it's like, is David Schwimmer coming up to you? Is he reaching out to you? No.
May Martin
I do think with the podcast especially, people do feel like they. They intimately know us and. And those can be tricky to navigate.
Tig Notaro
Yeah. But most people are cool and don't cross boundaries or get weird or, you know.
May Martin
Yeah. Yeah. Most people are.
Tig Notaro
Yeah.
May Martin
Great.
Tig Notaro
Absolutely. Especially our handsome community.
May Martin
God, they're. They're so good.
Tig Notaro
Yeah, they're so good.
May Martin
Speaking of which, shall we hear some questions?
Tig Notaro
Yeah, let's hear from them.
Stephanie
Hello, handsomes. My name is Rhiannon, and my question is a two parter first part for Tig. I'd like to know when and how did you know that Stephanie was the one for you? And for May and Fortune. I'd like to know if you. If and when you meet somebody that you want to spend the rest of your life with, how will you know that they're the one?
Tig Notaro
It's. You know, maybe I've mentioned this before, but I remember years ago when I had met Nick Offerman, and he is. What?
May Martin
He's the one for me?
Tig Notaro
Well, yeah, but, you know, he's married to the actress Megan Mullally, and I remember him talking about realizing she was the one he was gonna marry. And I can't quite. I want to revisit this conversation with him because it really struck me because it was before I had ever met somebody that I for sure knew I wanted to spend my life with. And I remember him saying something to the effect of like. Yeah. And then I was like, ah, I'm gonna have to marry her. Like, she's the one I'm gonna marry. Like, it was something like. It could have sounded like he's not excited, but he was like, no, no, no, it's not that at all. I think now that I've met Stephanie and I felt that thing of, like, it's undeniable. I guess it's coming for you. It's like an avalanche. It's like, we're getting married. This is it. And I used to always ask people, nick, I think that's why he was telling me. I was like, how do you know? I was always wanting to know, like, how what was what. Because it's that thing that before you've experienced it, you don't know how to know.
May Martin
Right.
Tig Notaro
How will I know? Like. Like our listener is asking. And I think if it is that feeling of uncertainty, then you haven't had that feeling.
May Martin
Yeah.
Tig Notaro
You know, and I for sure had it with Stephanie. I was like, oh, my God, I want to marry this person.
May Martin
I love that.
Allstate Announcer
You know what's smart? Checking Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds on car insurance. You know what's not smart? Not checking the sky for beautiful clouds. Even if you only have five minutes, nothing's more relaxing than watching some clouds float by.
Tig Notaro
Yeah. Check in first is smart. So check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings vary, subject to terms, conditions and availability. Allstate North American Insurance Company and affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois.
May Martin
But then also, that's probably because partly you were both. You were ready for that. I think we get decision paralysis and that we're overwhelmed by all the options and choice, and there are probably multiple people for everybody, and sometimes the person who's the one is the person who you both are. Just like, we choose this, we want this, and so we're going to choose it and keep choosing it. And then there's the thing that makes them the one is that they keep choosing it.
Tig Notaro
Well, yeah, I definitely relate to that now that, like, you know, Stephanie and I are. I mean, obviously anything in life could happen, but I feel like we're very locked into our life and our love and family and all of that stuff. And, yeah, you're choosing, but not because it's like.
We'Re having a hard time we're going to just choose to do this. But, of course, there are times when it's hard and you make. Make those choices to stay in it, which is great because you should see what's on the other side of it. And maybe there's not anything, but I didn't feel out of the gate like I chose it. I felt like it chose you. Yeah, it's like, wow. Kind of like what Nick was saying, like, yeah, I guess we're getting married. You know, I want to revisit that conversation with Him.
May Martin
Yeah, I like that.
Tig Notaro
Yeah.
May Martin
Should we hear Rhiannon's answer?
Tig Notaro
Yes, of course we should.
Stephanie
My answer to this question is that a few weeks into dating my wife, I realized that even though we spent just about every spare minute together, I never got tired of being around them. And I wanted.
I didn't want personal space. I didn't feel like I needed any space. And so about 15 years later, here we are. I still think they're the most interesting person I've ever met, and I just.
May Martin
Yeah.
Stephanie
So I'm curious. Well, thank you for your podcast. You are keeping us laughing in dark times.
May Martin
That's so nice. I mean, it is the person you're gonna spend the most time with. You have to be friends. You have to. I remember with Parv, when we lived together, we'd often find ourselves in the kitchen, like. Like losing track of time, just mingling, almost like just talking. We'd be standing in the kitchen for like, an hour just talking, and then it was like, yeah, yeah.
Tig Notaro
I love the idea of mingling with your girlfriend.
May Martin
Mingling in the kitchen is crucial. Yeah.
Tig Notaro
I'm going to invite Stephanie to meet me in the kitchen to mingle a bit before the day starts.
May Martin
Yeah. Pretend you're at a party and you found each other and you.
Tig Notaro
Yeah, that's great. Should we get another question?
May Martin
Yeah, let's do it.
Listener (Indira or Rhiannon)
Hello, I'm Indira. Sorry for my English. I'm not a native speaker. I'm your listener from Germany, and I have a question to me especially. But I would be happy to hear the answer from any of you. So I have a niece who I could call a wayward, a troubled teenager. And I would love to build a stronger connection to her or help my mom, her grandma, to build a stronger connection to her.
And the question is, what can you recommend to a relative of such a teenager to build the stronger connection?
Tig Notaro
That's a really good question.
May Martin
Really good.
Tig Notaro
Yeah.
May Martin
I think that the temptation is to be.
Well, I think you have to remember. So probably this person, like, wants to be with their friends all the time and is maybe like, I don't know what they're struggling with at the moment. But thinking, why is it that teenagers feel that pull to their friends and that sort of individuation from family where they feel like. I mean, I think everybody has that as a teenager. Right. You get so shifted. Yes. It's so important. But thinking, well, what could we could. I have to get to know this person as an individual. What does she like to do? You know, if I want to connect with her. How can I connect with her with things that she's interested about? Like take her somewhere that is in line with her interests or. And yeah, like, instead of being like, why won't she come to the family dinner and like sit?
Tig Notaro
You know what I mean? Like, hey, take me to your ideal day. Show me your ideal day, start to finish, where you want to eat, where you want to go. Introduce me to your friends. I'm so curious about your life.
May Martin
Totally. And I think a judgment free place for her to talk. Like, if you want her to open up to you, then you. Then when she does, you've got to hold that. Like, you can't. You. You have to be non reactive. You have to listen and. Yeah, because I think it's so easy to tell people to be honest, but it has to be a safe environment for them to be honest in, you know? Yeah, but that's tough. I mean, I would just resist any labeling of her or pathologizing. Just really help her to feel that this is a fluid transitional time.
Tig Notaro
Yeah. Maybe sharing stories about your own life and naturally putting that into a conversation of times that you were maybe feeling a little off track or confused.
May Martin
Yeah.
Tig Notaro
Troubled in some way. And I, I know when I've shared things with Max and thin struggles as a kid.
May Martin
Yeah.
Tig Notaro
They're blown away.
May Martin
Oh, they like. Yeah. Kids love to hear the stories.
Tig Notaro
Yeah. They're like, you really, Mary, you didn't. And I'm like, no, I didn't.
May Martin
Yeah.
Tig Notaro
I can't believe it.
May Martin
I would also say, like, pick your battles. Like if, like this is a, like for example, and I'm sure this is not the situation, but let's say this person's like, doing coke or doing drugs or like, then if they are gonna hang out with you on the condition that they can smoke a cigarette around you, like, let them do that for now, like, if you know what I mean. Or.
Yeah, like pick your battles and let them. Let them be. As long as they're not putting themselves in danger. You know what I mean?
Tig Notaro
Yeah. I'm not being very articulate, open. I want to know who you are.
May Martin
Yeah, yeah. Like my friend Carolyn Taylor, who I've talked about so much, who would just. When I was like on sofas and such a mess and she would just take me for a burger once a month and, and sometimes we'd do laser tag or we do painting and it was like sober activities that were really fun and I would look forward to it and I could, I could be a mess and I could. I could smoke cigarettes and you know what I mean? But I looked forward to it all month and it was so wholesome.
Tig Notaro
I think that's great.
May Martin
Yeah.
Tig Notaro
Well, thanks for reaching out, asking the questions and.
Just really, really appreciate you guys and gals and ladies and them Ds and everybody.
May Martin
We do.
Tig Notaro
Yeah. And share episodes with friends. Help build the community.
May Martin
I've been really enjoying the advice questions like that one from Indira. That's. That's juicy. Or. Yeah, but anything.
Tig Notaro
Yeah. We remain open.
May Martin
We remain open. If you have like an encounter with a ghost or something that you want to share, I'd like to hear it.
Tig Notaro
Amaze all ears and wide eyes. And go to speakpipe.com handsomepod to submit your questions. Yeah. Share episodes, rate, review, check out YouTube, all of it. And I don't know until next time, keep it pretty.
Handsome.
Handsome is hosted by me, Tig Notaro, Mae Martin and Fortune theme ster. The show is produced, recorded and edited by Thomas Willette. Email us@handsomepodmail.com Follow us on social media Ansomepod what a podcast.
May Martin
What a podcast.
That was a hit. Gum podcast.
Tig Notaro
You know what's smart? Checking Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds on car insurance. You know, it's not smart not checking that you packed your favorite sweater for a weekend up in the mountains. My favorite sweater is so warm that I can only wear it in the coldest weather, so I take it every opportunity that I can get.
Allstate Announcer
Yeah, checking first is smart. So check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings vary subject to terms, conditions and availability. Allstate North American Insurance Company and Affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois.
Hosts: Tig Notaro, Mae Martin (Fortune Feimster absent)
Date: December 5, 2025
Producer: Headgum
This “pretty little episode” of Handsome features comedians Tig Notaro and Mae Martin (with Fortune Feimster absent) in their trademark playful, meandering style. The duo field questions from listeners, riff on fruit facts, celebrity relationships, choosing “the one,” and giving advice on connecting with troubled teens. The show is lighthearted, self-deprecating, and full of the hosts’ personality-driven tangents.
Asked by Rhiannon (09:34)
Tig on Knowing Stephanie Was 'The One':
Mae’s Reflection:
Stephanie (Tig's wife) shares her perspective:
Mae:
Asked by Indira from Germany (15:11)
Advice from the hosts:
This episode continues Handsome's tradition of blending goofball humor with genuine listener connection and heartfelt advice. The hosts riff on random trivia, demystify relationship milestones, normalize struggles in family dynamics, and embrace the oddity of public life, all while fostering a sense of supportive community for their audience.
For more questions or to join the conversation:
Submit at speakpipe.com/handsomepod
Email: handsomepodmail@gmail.com