Handsome Podcast - Pretty Little Episode #69

Date: December 12, 2025
Hosts: Mae Martin, Fortune Feimster
Summary by Time Markers

Episode Overview

This episode is a classic “Handsome” conversation between two of the three “pretty little hosts”: Mae Martin and Fortune Feimster. The episode features Mae’s continuing saga with learning to drive in LA (!), a hilarious and slightly surreal debate about which animals they’d choose to ride if cars didn’t exist, and a question about Justin Trudeau’s legacy—now oddly entwined with pop star Katy Perry.

Listeners from around the world send in questions big and small, and the hosts weave their answers through stories, tangents, and plenty of self-deprecating humor.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Mae’s Driving Lessons in LA ([01:39]–[04:47])

• Mae’s Driving Adventures: Mae recounts her third driving lesson, including her terrifying virgin trip on LA freeways (405 and 101) in a convertible with a new instructor named Robert—who is apparently a bit too chatty and phone-happy for Mae’s taste.
• Highway Fears: Mae: “When I look over my shoulder before I change lanes, the minute my eyes leave the road the car starts to drift.” ([02:51])
• Practicing for the License: Mae’s test is set for December 8, and she muses about needing her own car to truly gain independence.
• Fortune’s Advice: Fortune encourages patience and practice: “You’ll get more comfortable in time, but it just… it does take time, you know? So give yourself some grace, my friend.” ([05:23])
• Banter about Safety and Learning Curves: Fortune lightly dodges Mae’s request for a passenger confidence check: “I want you to practice for a little bit longer.” ([05:00])

2. Sports Fandom in LA ([05:33]–[06:45])

• Baseball and Soccer: Fortune’s Dodgers hat prompts some friendly cross-border ribbing about the World Series and the Blue Jays vs. Dodgers.
• Looking Forward to the World Cup: Both hosts discuss the upcoming soccer World Cup, with Mae rooting for England and Fortune expressing sticker shock at ticket prices. Mae jokes about getting the World Cup to sponsor their podcast ([06:08]).

3. Listener Question: What Would You Ride if Not Cars? ([06:52]–[12:48])

Question from Naomi (South Korea):
“If we lived in a world where instead of cars, we all rode on mounts, and whichever mount you have, no one else could have that mount—which one would you choose? It can be any creature, full size if necessary.” ([06:52])

Hosts’ Deliberation:

• Mae Jumps to Big Cats:
  • “I want fast but safe… and maybe a little sexy. Like a—I'm still—I'm gonna go leopard, you know, like Bagheera in Jungle Book.” ([08:17])
• Fortune Recounts Camel Riding:
  • Stories about riding camels in Dubai, and the physically demanding “forward and back” sway of a camel getting up. “It's not the most comfortable… it whooshes you forward.” ([10:05])
• Comparing Animal ‘Vehicles’:
  • Mae: “If I’m going down the highway on my leopard and then you’re clomping along on your camel—you know, I’m zooming.” ([11:12])
  • Fortune: “I would probably do like a cheetah or something. I want to be fast.” ([11:44])

Naomi’s Answer ([12:06]):

• “I would choose a moose because they’re very strong and fast and they’re also very comfortable, I imagine… And if I ever got into some sort of battle, I think a moose would be really strong and fast.”
• Hosts’ Reactions:
  • Mae doubts moose comfort but is amused.
  • Mae brings out a classic “Handsome” tangent: “Wasn’t there a guy who had a pet moose that was an alcoholic?” ([13:01])
  • The two recount the story of Tycho Brahe’s drunk moose, which met a sorrowful end (“…became so inebriated on beer at a banquet that it fell down a flight of stairs and died.” [14:14]).

4. Listener Question: Justin Trudeau’s “Legacy” and Katy Perry ([14:59]–[21:28])

Question from Mallory (Tennessee):
“Mae, you told Justin Trudeau that his legacy would be great, and now he is dating Katy Perry. Is that the great legacy you envisioned for him?” ([14:59])

Hosts’ Responses:

• Mae’s Trudeau Encounter:
  • Mae recalls meeting Trudeau and, despite intending to grill him politically, blurting out: “your legacy will be great.” ([15:27])
• On Trudeau's Image:
  • Mae: “He’s so classically good-looking, Trudeau, that… I don’t know.” ([16:57])
  • Fortune: “They're both good looking and they're both Zoolander 2—ridiculously, ridiculously good looking people.” ([16:42])
• Celebrity PR & Paparazzi:
  • Discussion of famous couples (Trudeau/Katy Perry, JLO/Ben Affleck) apparently inviting paparazzi attention.
  • Fortune: “There are some celebrities who 1000% call the paparazzi… those pictures are there because they wanted those pictures to be there.” ([18:50])
• What Paparazzi Shot Would You Stage?
  • Mae: “I wouldn’t mind staging a whole kind of hero situation for myself where I get actors to do a fake… brawling on the street, and I go up—‘hey, whoa, whoa, whoa, guys, come on.’” ([20:34])
  • Fortune: “I would just… actually brush my hair… have a little makeup on... a nice jacket’s hiding the rolls a little bit.” ([21:03])

Mallory’s Follow-up ([21:28]):

• “Yeah, that's pretty much what I thought.” Mallory confirms she foresaw Trudeau’s celeb-dating turn as “legacy-worthy.”

Memorable Quotes & Comic Beats

• Mae on New Driving Instructor:
  “I have a new guy called Robert, and today I drove out to the hills… He chats, he'll show me stuff on his phone.”—[02:18]
• Fortune’s Camel Ride Tale:
  “You get on it and it whooshes you forward… I almost like chipped a tooth banging into Jack's head.”—[10:37]
• Mae on Mount Choices:
  “I want fast but safe, basically. So I want… oh, and maybe a little sexy, like a… I'm still—I'm gonna go leopard, you know, like Bagheera in Jungle Book.”—[08:17]
• Moose on the Loose:
  “There was a guy who had a pet moose that was an alcoholic. The moose was… refers to the anecdote of Tycho Brahe, a Danish astronomer who kept a pet moose that became so inebriated on beer at a banquet that it fell down a flight of stairs and died.”—[13:45]
• Fortune on Paparazzi:
  “There are some celebrities who 1000% call the paparazzi and those pictures are there because they wanted those pictures to be there.”—[18:50]
• Mae’s Paparazzi Wish:
  “I wouldn’t mind staging a whole kind of hero situation where I get actors to do a fake… brawling on the street, and I go up—‘hey, whoa, whoa, whoa, guys, come on.’”—[20:34]

Timestamps for Key Segments

• Driving lesson anxiety/story: [01:39]–[04:47]
• World series / World Cup chat: [05:33]–[06:45]
• “What animal would you ride?” (Naomi Q): [06:52]–[12:48]
• Moose and drunken animal history: [13:01]–[14:39]
• Justin Trudeau’s “legacy” (Mallory Q): [14:59]–[21:28]
• Discussion on fame, legacy, paparazzi staging: [18:41]–[21:23]

Tone & Style

As ever, the hosts juggle earnestness and absurdity—a little slice of therapy mixed with comic anthropology. Self-deprecating and warm, with tangents that never feel forced and a running rapport that fast-friends will enjoy.

Final Thoughts

• Driving lessons in Los Angeles are a source of both terror and comedy.
• If cars didn’t exist, Mae is a feline speed fiend; Naomi is all about sturdy moose transport—if you can keep them sober.
• Trudeau’s new romantic legacy? It somehow fits, even if it’s not what anyone meant by “a great legacy.”
• The best celebrity photo ops might just be the ones you stage yourself—or the ones where you finally brush your hair.

Listener questions remain an episodic highlight: unpredictable, prompting thoughtful and entertaining debate, and often spinning off in delightful, weird directions.

For more on upcoming shows, check the hosts' socials and keep those curious, wild, and oddball questions coming via speakpipe.com/handsomepod!