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- [00:02]
A
This is a Headgun podcast.
- [00:06]
B
Checking Allstate first could save you hundreds on car insurance. Not checking with my interior designer friend before I buy a big rug for the living room. They helped me design. Oh, I wanted to show initiative, but I picked the wrong colors and now all I'm showing is a receipt so that I can return this carpet for a refund.
- [00:22]
A
Yeah, check in first is handsome. So check Allstate first for an auto quote. It could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings vary subject to terms, conditions and Available Allstate North American Insurance Company and Affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois. ANSOM is supported by Squarespace. Squarespace gives you everything you need to offer services and get paid all in one place. We built a custom website with Squarespace. Not only was it easy, it was fun too. Whether it's for your personal portfolio, business, or handsome podcasts, Squarespace helps you build a website you can be proud of. They've got so many tools to make your life easy, including professional on brand invoices, online payments, built in appointment scheduling, and email marketing.
- [01:02]
C
With Squarespace, your design is infinitely adaptable to suit your needs with intuitive drag and drop editing, beautiful styling options, unrivaled visual design effects on brand content, and more ways to list what you offer. No prior experience required. Squarespace domains help you find the best name for your business at one fair, all inclusive price. No hidden fees or add ons required.
- [01:29]
A
So what are you waiting for? Get started on your dream website today. Head to squarespace.com handsome for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, use offer code handsome to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Chatting with friends on the Handsome pod. Chatting with friends on the Handsome podcast.
- [01:53]
B
Cheers. Cheers.
- [01:56]
C
Blah, blah.
- [01:57]
B
Do we all go for it?
- [01:59]
C
I think that's the first time we all went.
- [02:01]
B
We all went for it. Welcome to the Handsome Pod. Ah. I got it. You did it. It's Fortune, it's May.
- [02:09]
C
And it's Tig.
- [02:11]
B
Yeah, it is.
- [02:12]
C
You guys, I feel like it's been a beat since we've done this.
- [02:17]
A
I always feel like that. I miss you guys.
- [02:20]
B
I miss you too. I'm about to see May tonight. Yeah.
- [02:23]
C
What? Oh, the show at Largo.
- [02:26]
B
Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're missing out because you're out of town.
- [02:32]
C
I'm in Toronto and not in a
- [02:34]
A
spacesuit in my hometown. Oh, yeah. And you're not not Star Trekking. You're just in Toronto. Yeah.
- [02:40]
C
And it's so crazy because I'm just Saying human words to other humans and just having conversations, which I have not done in so long.
- [02:52]
A
Yeah, you're not being like, the nebulas and hyperdrive.
- [02:55]
C
Yeah. Yeah.
- [02:57]
A
That was pretty good.
- [02:58]
C
It is. It was pretty good fortune. Do you want to give it a whirl?
- [03:01]
B
The nebula says.
- [03:03]
C
No, no, your own. Your own.
- [03:05]
A
Your own sci fi dialogue.
- [03:07]
B
Oh, God. You know I can't come up with the dialogue.
- [03:10]
C
I know, girl.
- [03:11]
B
Proto pack is at full capacity. We must.
- [03:16]
C
That's good.
- [03:17]
B
Beam ourselves up to another Earth.
- [03:21]
A
Yeah, great.
- [03:22]
C
You know, nerd.
- [03:24]
B
So I don't know how this works.
- [03:27]
C
I was. Speaking of nerds. I was actually trying to find a picture of something in Toronto. And when Thomas was my assistant, he came with me and he almost ended up on Star Trek. And look what I found today. Thomas.
- [03:44]
A
Thomas.
- [03:46]
B
Amazing.
- [03:47]
A
Yeah, I got fully dressed up on Star Trek. That's me wearing, like, a cadet uniform.
- [03:54]
C
And then they came up to me and they were like, oh, you can't.
- [03:57]
B
Because of, like, the unions or something like that.
- [04:00]
C
Such a bummer. I was trying to give Thomas a. A little space perk.
- [04:05]
B
But, yeah, go to Hulu if you
- [04:09]
C
want to see Mr. Thomas in a spacesuit.
- [04:12]
B
Who would space perk for you?
- [04:15]
A
I love how much you're smiling in the picture. I wish you did have a cameo. And you were just smiling like that in the background, grinning.
- [04:22]
C
Also. Not that you look elderly now, Thomas, but you look four and a half in, like, every picture that pops up when you're holding Max and Finn as babies. When you're in a spacesuit, it's really wild.
- [04:34]
A
Anyway, the passage of time, we gotta crack that.
- [04:39]
B
Time is crazy.
- [04:40]
A
Someone's gotta figure out a way to just pause it.
- [04:42]
B
Have you ever just thought, time is nuts?
- [04:45]
C
And if you. If you could pause it, who would you spend your time with?
- [04:49]
A
You know, it's you, too. Yeah.
- [04:51]
B
That might be one of our top five moments on the pod. There have been many, Alex.
- [04:57]
C
That was maybe number one.
- [04:58]
B
That was early on. Of, like, if I could stop time, I would hang out with you guys. And Tig and I just crack in silence.
- [05:08]
A
You're like, I'm a little busy.
- [05:10]
C
Yeah. Can't say I do the same, but I do like and care about you.
- [05:16]
B
Absolutely.
- [05:19]
C
I have to say, also, it continues to blow my mind. Who listens to this podcast?
- [05:26]
A
Oh, tell us, girl.
- [05:27]
C
I mean. I mean, it's. Girl. It's just like, girl. Okay, girl. Being on set here in Toronto,
- [05:36]
B
this girl.
- [05:37]
C
It's just girl. I'm trying to, but it's Always. It's. It's not necessarily like, wow, I wouldn't picture you listening to the podcast. It's just that I hear it all the time. Did I tell you? Also, I don't know if I told you this. At Stephen Colbert's finale, the after party, I was talking to one of his sons and he was like, oh, yeah. And I just. I love your podcast.
- [06:02]
A
No way.
- [06:03]
B
That's cool.
- [06:04]
C
College age Colbert son. I go, wait, what do you do? What? And he was like, I love your podcast. And I was like, you listen to my podcast? And he was like, yeah. Why do you sound shocked? I was like, I don't know. I can't track why and who listens to this nonsense.
- [06:24]
A
But that's incredible nonsense.
- [06:27]
C
It's so nice to know that, like, of course I know people listen to it, but it's just when you see the faces, whether it's somebody on set doing my sound, you know, doing my sound pack, or Stephen Colbert's son, or somebody walking by me saying, keep it, handsome. Keep it.
- [06:45]
A
Yeah.
- [06:45]
C
I'm like, it's really. Yeah, it's just endlessly nice.
- [06:49]
B
I think, too, we kind of forget because we're just really are chatting with friends. People will come up and tell me something about myself and I'm like, how do they know this? Yeah. Like, oh, we must have talked about this on the podcast. Exactly.
- [07:05]
A
I know. And then you. When someone says that, then you pictured, like, what context are they listening to it in? Like, I picture people making their pancakes in the morning, listening. Or like, driving to work and.
- [07:14]
C
Yeah, I don't think anything about that.
- [07:17]
A
Oh, my.
- [07:18]
B
My favorite thing. And this has happened several times, and I have past people who go, oh, my God. And they hold up their phone.
- [07:26]
C
Oh, yeah.
- [07:27]
B
And they're listening to the podcast.
- [07:29]
A
That's right.
- [07:29]
C
I've had that happen.
- [07:30]
B
That would be very trippy. I haven't had that happen in my life where I'm listening to something and pass by that person. I haven't either.
- [07:37]
C
I was boarding a plane once, and this guy turned around, he was like, no way. And showed me his phone. I was like, oh, my gosh, that's so funny.
- [07:46]
A
I had once. Maybe I've said this, but I had. I went on a hike. It was one of my first times in la. And I went to a waterfall with my friend Phil, who was in Feel Good playing Phil and my friend.
- [07:56]
C
Wait, we have a waterfall in la?
- [07:58]
A
Yeah. Just.
- [07:59]
B
Yeah.
- [07:59]
A
So many actually. Switzer Falls. Anyways, so I was like, oh, I missed this. So I Had Phil, who played Phil in Feel Good, and Jack, who played Jack in Feelgood. And the show had just come out
- [08:10]
B
and it's kind of like 30 new names.
- [08:13]
A
No, I don't. Well, I try to back the network into a corner where they have to cast the people I wrote it for.
- [08:18]
B
Gotcha.
- [08:19]
A
But this woman was like. It was like her mind was exploding. She was like, I. I was just watching the show, and then now I'm in the show with three characters saying their same names, frolicking in a waterfall. Yeah, that would be nice.
- [08:32]
C
Yeah. I didn't know about the waterfalls.
- [08:34]
A
Oh, you gotta. You gotta take the voice. There's. Switzer Falls is like half an hour drive from me, so I don't know from you, but it's like you go up into the mountains and then it's just a little hike down, there's a long river and then these waterfalls.
- [08:48]
C
Okay. And you know what I've been meaning to ask you, May, please. Is your house still up on that hill?
- [08:57]
B
Oh, no, it's still intact.
- [08:59]
A
What if I just turned my camera around and the whole side of the house was missing? Yeah, still here. Still queer.
- [09:07]
C
Get used to it.
- [09:08]
B
Just Pride Month. So exciting.
- [09:11]
A
Yeah.
- [09:11]
B
You're so queer.
- [09:12]
A
Thank God. Yeah.
- [09:14]
B
I was telling me, I just got back from Europe with my mom.
- [09:19]
A
Yeah, tell us, girl.
- [09:20]
B
I mean, y'.
- [09:21]
C
All.
- [09:21]
B
It was a doozy because it was on our prelo episode, I believe that May and I originally were discussing whether or not I take my mom on this Make a Wish trip. And I ended up doing it.
- [09:37]
C
Boy, is that an example of time and space.
- [09:40]
B
Yeah. And so anyway, I ended up doing it and. But I said, okay, mom, the one thing I'm asking of you is that you don't bring a checked in bag. Like, we need to work with a carry on bag, like a luggage and then a purse or book bag or something like that. I said, because we've got it. I'm taking you to three countries.
- [10:03]
C
You.
- [10:03]
B
Your balance isn't great. I'm gonna have to carry all our bags. And we just. I just need this, please. We've had multiple conversations about it. And she'd be like, how many shoes should I bring? I'm like, two Max. Should bring snacks. You can. For the plane. You know, it was like one, but it's like all that went out the window.
- [10:21]
C
Yeah.
- [10:21]
B
So I'm in Copenhagen. I've been in Europe touring by myself for five days. I'm excited to be around another human.
- [10:27]
C
I have no idea what's coming.
- [10:32]
B
I'M filming her sitting there at the baggage claim in Copenhagen, not even really thinking, why is she a baggage claim? And I'm like, mom, hi. Welcome to company.
- [10:43]
C
And she's like, hey.
- [10:45]
B
And then I see her kind of do a look down to her bag, and I see the bag and immediately stop recording. I'm like, mom, what is this? It's this humongous bag that she checked in.
- [10:58]
C
She goes, 20 shoes? Yes.
- [11:01]
B
And I'm like, mom, we talked about this. Oh, my God. She goes, I thought it was a carry on. It's humongous. And I'm like, no. And then so I'm getting my bags and her bags. I start to roll them.
- [11:16]
C
She's.
- [11:16]
B
Someone's helping me because she's in a wheelchair. And I start to roll her bag, and it's like, kerplunk, kerplunk, kerplunk. It's not rolling. It's broken.
- [11:24]
A
No.
- [11:24]
B
And I'm like, how am I gonna do this?
- [11:27]
C
You don't need this. You don't need this, girl.
- [11:29]
B
Girl, I do not need this. And I'm like, clunking her bag out of the Copenhagen airport. And I'm just like, mom, this is. I don't, like. I don't know how to do this. I don't know how to get through the next five days. And then we get to her hotel room. I start going through a bag. She has, like, three pairs of shoes. I'm like, you're here for two days. I mean, five days. What is this? And then in her carry on bag, which is a Trader Joe's cooler, by the way. A cooler bag?
- [12:01]
A
No way. Her carry on is a cooler
- [12:05]
B
Half the bag is filled with snacks. I was like, mom, why? It's like a whole bag of Tootsie Pops. A whole bag of Tootsie Rolls, animal crackers, goldfish crackers, Goobers, candy from, like, the movie theater, all this stuff. I was like, they have food in Europe and it's better, actually.
- [12:26]
C
Yeah.
- [12:27]
B
So we had to. We ended up leaving half all that food.
- [12:31]
C
There's nothing better than Goobers.
- [12:33]
A
The Goobers.
- [12:34]
B
I was like, keep the Goobers.
- [12:35]
C
But I actually don't even know what are goobers?
- [12:37]
A
Yeah, what are goobers?
- [12:38]
B
Like a chocolate covered peanut.
- [12:41]
C
Oh.
- [12:41]
B
Oh, yeah, yeah. And then I found a bag, you know, I stopped into one of those, like, tourist stores, bought her a new bag, a carry on bag, Purple and hot pink.
- [12:52]
C
Drove her back to the airport.
- [12:56]
B
I. We were able to fit in all once.
- [12:58]
C
She took half.
- [12:59]
B
Half this, you know, all the Snacks out of her bag. We were able to maneuver everything. So crisis averted.
- [13:05]
A
Oh, my God.
- [13:05]
B
But I don't know how we would have traveled the way that she originally intended us to.
- [13:10]
C
And did y' all have. Yeah, yeah. Grand old time. Delicious food.
- [13:14]
B
We had a great time. I mean, but it. I mean, it was a great time. Also very stressful. Just trying to keep her from getting hit or fall down cobblestones.
- [13:24]
A
Yeah.
- [13:25]
B
No, there's just bikes everywhere. You know, it's Europe. Like, Copenhagen's all bikes, giant buses, taxis. So we'd, like, cross the street to catch the taxi. And I'd be like, just stay here. Don't move. Don't just stay. I turn to, like, get her taxi door. She just wanders off into the bike lane. I, like, grab her by the shoulder. Yeah. I pull her up. A bike goes, phew. Like, she would have died. I was like. And she goes, oh, my God. Oh, my God. I'm like, mom, you have to listen to me.
- [14:02]
C
That is so stressful.
- [14:04]
B
Yes. So, like, we had a lovely time, but then it just was me constantly, like, you know, when we're. We walked to my show in Copenhagen, there's, like, cobblestones everywhere.
- [14:16]
A
Yeah.
- [14:16]
B
And I'm just like, you should have
- [14:19]
C
given her, like, a piggy front ride.
- [14:22]
B
I know. We had. We took a little water boat tour in Copenhagen. Ate great food, lots of pastries. London, we had afternoon tea.
- [14:32]
A
Got to love it.
- [14:33]
B
Like, two pretty little ladies.
- [14:35]
C
Did you do your pinky out when you're having your tea out? Of course. Of course.
- [14:40]
B
That might be for high tea.
- [14:42]
C
Did you have any gentleman callers when you two were having tea?
- [14:45]
B
Unfortunately, we were trying to hit the town looking for them dudes, but no bites.
- [14:52]
C
Yeah.
- [14:53]
B
Then in Dublin, we took a Viking splash tour. What. What does that mean? You know those duck tours, like in. Oh, yeah.
- [15:04]
A
Like a car that can drive.
- [15:06]
B
Yeah, yeah. We don't. Like a bigger. You wear Viking hats.
- [15:11]
A
That's cool.
- [15:11]
C
Wait, no, that's not.
- [15:14]
B
I think that's cool. I posted a whole video on it. We both had our Viking hats. And every now. And you go, yeah.
- [15:23]
A
Oh, this is good.
- [15:24]
C
See, this is the first time I wish I was still on social media.
- [15:28]
A
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- [15:30]
B
Pretty cute because I'm filming her in her Viking hat. And then there was. The bus wasn't full, so I sat up in front of her and we're going. And it's a nice sunny day and we're going through it, and she just looks so funny in this Viking hat. The guy that's the tour guide's like, enthusiastic and yelling things and it's chaotic. And then at some point the sun goes away and now it's really cold. And I look back on my. My phone of my mom. She has her hood over her hat and she's like shaking cold.
- [16:02]
A
Oh, my God.
- [16:04]
B
And I'm like, you don't have your hat on.
- [16:07]
A
And then they.
- [16:08]
B
Then halfway through, they put life jackets on you. So I put it on her again and she's like interviking at with a giant life jacket on her. It was hilarious.
- [16:19]
C
Oh, my God.
- [16:20]
A
Was she a hit though? Like at the shows, did she ever shout her out?
- [16:24]
B
People loved her. Every show she goes to, she. They clamor to her and say hi to her. They love it. I. Although I had made it through the whole trip, everything was like, smooth. I was in Dublin, last country. At the end of the show, she stands up and apparently just falls back. Oh, God. And I didn't see it happening. I just was kind of like, you know, shaking some people's hands and stuff. And someone goes, fortune, your mom just fell. And I'm like, what? Oh my. Just like, oh, my God. And I'm just like, are you okay?
- [17:00]
C
She's like, I'm fine.
- [17:01]
B
I landed right on my butt. Oh, my God.
- [17:05]
A
Fortune.
- [17:08]
B
Yeah. Iron and fruit.
- [17:16]
A
Checking Allstate first could save you hundreds on car insurance. Not checking that my pantry is stocked with my favorite cookies. Massive regret. I forgot to pick them up at the grocery store. Guess it's carrot sticks for me tonight.
- [17:28]
B
Yeah, checking first is handsome. So check Allstate first for an auto quote. It could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings vary subject to terms, conditions and availability. Allstate North American Insurance Company and affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois.
- [17:43]
A
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- [18:01]
C
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- [18:49]
A
Your outdoor space should feel like you. I'm still getting my new place set up, and as the weather's getting warmer, I'm now turning my attention to my outdoor areas. That's where Wayfair has been a game changer for me. With Wayfair, I've been able to find pieces that match the exact feel I'm going for. So now I'm so set up, I feel like I have a whole extra living room to my house that just happens to be outdoors.
- [19:10]
C
Whether your vibe is modern, coastal, farmhouse, or eclectic, Wayfair has options to help you create an outdoor space that's uniquely yours. Wayfair makes it simple to narrow down to what works for your style and budget. We got a couple deck chairs for our upstairs porch that are perfect for lounging with a book. We had some very specific dimensions to work with, but Wayfair's filters made it easy to find something that was exactly the right size patio.
- [19:38]
A
Season is here, and these deals won't last. Head to Wayfair.com right now to get your outdoor space ready for way less. That's W-A-Y-F-A-I-R.com Wayfair Every style, every home.
- [19:53]
C
Do you think your mom would open for me next tour? Yeah, and she sure would. Like, she would just wave to everyone from stage for like, 15 minutes.
- [20:03]
A
I think she did a Q and A.
- [20:04]
C
Love it. I feel like she loves the Q
- [20:06]
B
A. Yeah, I'd actually love to.
- [20:09]
A
I'd love to see Tig you interview Ginger, like a sort of deep Q A. That dynamic would be great.
- [20:16]
B
A deep one.
- [20:18]
C
I'm. I'm all in.
- [20:20]
B
I would love it. Oh, that. Well, it was a treat. It was fun.
- [20:24]
A
I'm glad you did.
- [20:25]
B
I'm glad we took. I'm glad I took her. I'm glad she's safe. She had a little book club. I guess she. Her book club has a thing where they do. Someone does, like, a presentation like, once a month on, like, whatever. And she did hers was up yesterday and she did a whole presentation on her trip. And I can imagine it was adorable.
- [20:47]
A
That's really good.
- [20:48]
C
Amazing. Did they record it?
- [20:51]
B
I don't think so, but she goes, I. I didn't take any notes. I spoke from the heart because I Don't like it when people read their presentation. I spoke mine.
- [21:04]
A
I'd like to hear her version of the trip now that we've heard yours. It's her being like, she made me get rid of my snacks. Yeah.
- [21:11]
B
Hers would be like. She fussed at me right as soon as she got off the plane.
- [21:17]
C
And had she. I can't remember. Had she been in. To Europe before?
- [21:20]
B
She had been to Europe, but it had been, you know, over a decade since. Well, because she also. She went on her. Honey, her. She got married, you know, a second time to a man. And that only lasted three months.
- [21:37]
C
I don't think I knew this.
- [21:39]
B
Oh, really?
- [21:39]
A
I knew she'd been married again, but I didn't know it was just three months.
- [21:43]
B
Yeah. So I did, in my special good fortune, I tell about how she had a circus theme wedding. Oh, my God. That was the marriage. She had been dating. Now, I say dating loosely, this man for five years. Very like more companions. And then out of nowhere, one day he proposed to her. And we were like, what? Because they were. There was no romantic spark here. They just were like friends who hung out, and suddenly they're getting married. Well, my mom went so bananas because she was so pumped to be getting married. She invited 300 people, my lord, to come to this wedding. And I'm like, mom, please, like, everyone. Y' all are like a weird pair. No one's gonna understand why you're getting married if I can wait.
- [22:33]
C
How old was she? And I'm so pumped. Is it just that ladies love to get married?
- [22:38]
B
I think ladies love to get married. Yeah. This was like 2011 or. Yeah. So I don't know how old she will. What was that? That was like 50 now. So 65 or something around my age. And she was just so pumped to get married. But she rented a red. A circus tent. Red and white striped circus tent. Put it inside the fellowship hall of our church. She had a hot dog cart as the main food.
- [23:09]
C
Yeah. She wasn't in love with this guy.
- [23:13]
B
She had a cotton candy maker, a nacho bar with jalapenos.
- [23:18]
C
No, she did not. She.
- [23:20]
B
Swear to God.
- [23:21]
C
Did she have a tilt a whirl, too?
- [23:23]
B
No. No games. But she. All the tables had linens on them, but, like pastels and bunny rabbits. It was not Easter. This was August.
- [23:35]
A
So this is a mix of themes.
- [23:37]
B
Mix of themes. She had two baby pools. You know, the plastic baby pools.
- [23:42]
C
Of course we do.
- [23:44]
B
So you probably assume, you know, there's like a bobbin for apple situation. No, she put Ice in them because they were our coolers for our soft drinks.
- [23:54]
C
Was your mother going through, like, a mental break?
- [23:59]
B
This is just my mom's personality. Dig. And then she had her friends singing, they're, like, going to the chapel and we're gonna get married. This man, he was in the corner the entire time being talked off a cliff. Like, he. I can't believe he went through the wedding.
- [24:24]
C
Was he. So was he having second thoughts?
- [24:27]
B
Oh, God, yes.
- [24:31]
C
And wait, your mother was not having second thoughts?
- [24:34]
B
My mom was having the time of her life. This was her time to shine. She was. All of her friends were there to see her. All these people in town, but everyone. Everyone was having a good time. They're kind of like, I don't really understand what this is. And so then they. That marriage lasted three months. She moved in there, and at three months from then, he was like, get out. Oh, my God. So take your petting zoo with you. Point of the story is they had a honeymoon already booked, and she went on that honeymoon to Bath, England, by herself.
- [25:14]
C
I bet she did.
- [25:15]
B
And that was her last time.
- [25:19]
A
How did she feel about the marriage ending? Or was she just. She was. She had the party. She didn't.
- [25:24]
B
She was kind of. You know. I know she was sad. So I. I don't mean to laugh at her misfortune, but.
- [25:32]
A
But how. Have you not told us the circus wedding before? That's really good.
- [25:36]
B
Oh, no, but if you knew. I. I don't want to podcast. Why? Everyone knew this marriage wasn't gonna last.
- [25:46]
A
Okay.
- [25:46]
B
All I will say is it was very. I'm not saying anything.
- [25:51]
C
He was gay.
- [25:52]
B
I'm not saying anything. He was not saying anything. But it was very apparent to many people why this was not a love connection.
- [26:04]
C
So do you think that they did any sort of top secret touching?
- [26:10]
B
No. Like, the most was, like, hold hands a little. Maybe a peck.
- [26:15]
C
Wow. Wow. So your mom married a gay man.
- [26:18]
B
I did not say that.
- [26:19]
C
I did.
- [26:20]
B
Right. I said it repeatedly, and I didn't confirm anything.
- [26:25]
C
I did.
- [26:25]
A
You're.
- [26:26]
B
You're just making things up.
- [26:28]
C
That's right. Out of the truth. What is?
- [26:31]
B
Clear as day, out of thin air.
- [26:33]
C
That's right.
- [26:34]
B
I didn't say any of that. But, yeah, they just weren't a match. That's all I'll say.
- [26:39]
C
Yeah.
- [26:40]
A
I understand now why you were like, rein it in on the luggage. Because if she'd gone full circus, showed up with.
- [26:46]
B
Yeah.
- [26:47]
A
Clowns. Yeah.
- [26:48]
B
And my mom can very easily, as you can see, get, get. Take things too far. Anyway, enough about me. What are you guys up to?
- [27:00]
C
I mean, nothing compared to your life. Life for. Yeah, yeah.
- [27:06]
A
Yeah, me neither. Really? Me neither. I've having a pretty chill time. I got a couple weeks at home. My. My friend Joe's here. We're writing. My house hasn't fallen off the cliff. Knock on wood.
- [27:18]
C
Although truly remarkable.
- [27:20]
A
I know. And I did see a thing online that said the fault lines are the pressure building.
- [27:26]
C
It's coming.
- [27:27]
B
I don't like this.
- [27:29]
C
I do have something to share.
- [27:35]
B
Oh, okay.
- [27:36]
C
Well, May shared it. Oh, you don't have to sound scared. Me?
- [27:42]
A
Yeah. I'm like, what did I share?
- [27:44]
C
Oh, God. May texted this to me and Stephanie.
- [27:49]
B
Oh, yeah.
- [27:50]
A
This was a license plate. I saw Tig Wife. How crazy is that? I was like, is that. I honestly crossed my mind.
- [27:59]
C
Truly, like, that is a bold move from Kerry Russell.
- [28:03]
A
Yeah. Wow.
- [28:04]
B
I know. Carrie Russell really is putting it up.
- [28:06]
C
I mean, she's flirting.
- [28:07]
B
Like, she is alerting.
- [28:10]
C
Yeah.
- [28:11]
B
It's flagrant.
- [28:12]
C
I asked Stephanie how she felt. I was like, when May sent that picture, I was like, how do you feel?
- [28:18]
A
Yeah.
- [28:19]
C
Knowing Carrie Russell is being this blatant. She said she's not. She's not scared. She knows she's got my attention. But.
- [28:29]
A
Yeah. You can't ruffle Stephanie. You can't make her jealous. You can't ruffle her.
- [28:33]
C
She's like, I can't ruffle her. But Carrie's gonna do. Carrie's gonna carry.
- [28:38]
B
Carrie's gonna carry. We all know that about Carrie.
- [28:41]
C
Oh, my God. Who knows Carrie better than us? Okay.
- [28:44]
B
Exactly. Yeah. Do you or Stephanie ever get jealous or y'. All. Is that ever.
- [28:52]
C
I mean, sure, there's moments where, I mean, I can't say that we. I cannot say we have a jealous relationship. There's definitely not that at all. But there's certainly moments in our relationship where it's like, wait, what's this connection? Yeah.
- [29:08]
B
Yeah.
- [29:09]
C
Or what's this excitement? Or. And then, you know, you seem a
- [29:14]
B
little too happy right now.
- [29:17]
A
Excuse me.
- [29:19]
C
Look over here.
- [29:21]
B
But.
- [29:22]
C
Yeah, I don't know.
- [29:24]
B
I. I think a little healthy bit dose of it here. And there's nothing wrong with that. As long as it's not like a thing. Which I don't. That y' all don't strike me that at all.
- [29:34]
A
No, you have a sense of humor about it. It's kind of nice. I kind of like it when someone gets a bit. Is like, like a sort of.
- [29:40]
B
Oh, they really like me.
- [29:42]
C
Yeah.
- [29:43]
A
The worst is when your partner or someone you're dating is jealous of a friend of yours or something, and they.
- [29:50]
B
And there's like, nothing there, or they're
- [29:52]
A
like, actually cold to that friend in a group set and you're like, yeah, that's the worst. Like, yeah, yeah, yeah.
- [30:00]
B
Has that happened where in past relationships where you couldn't, like, hang out with that friend as much as a result?
- [30:07]
A
Yeah, there was a friend where I was. This is a long, long time ago. Different, long, different relation. But where. Yeah, if. If they were both at a party, I'd be talking to this friend and then my girlfriend at the time would, like, come over and interrupt or, like, take me away. And it was so embarrassing because there was nothing there and the friend was like, okay. But.
- [30:26]
B
Okay. Yeah.
- [30:28]
C
Yeah, let's spin.
- [30:30]
A
Yeah, let's spin.
- [30:31]
C
Yeah, let's film. Yeah, that's not a fun way to live that jealous vibe. And I just think about younger, younger years where I think my own insecurity. I tried to probably make people jealous or, like, give my attention to somebody else or, you know, that just that kind of like young 20s type stuff. And I know not everyone does that, but I feel like I was guilty of that at times where I wasn't taking a relationship as seriously and then I would give attention elsewhere. I don't know. Not anything I'm proud of or would do now. Yeah.
- [31:13]
A
But when it comes down to it, when you're like, but if we weren't together, could you have an actual life with that person? Like, once you're, you know, because everyone's. We're going to be attracted to lots of different people, but you. Once you feel secure and like, well, we've built something here that's not disposable, then. Yeah.
- [31:31]
C
And I. I feel like I. I try to check in with myself and in my relationship where I. I'm like, don't get on, you know, autopilot.
- [31:44]
A
Yeah.
- [31:45]
C
Not that I have to always remind myself, but every now and then I'll be like, I got a good thing. I gotta, like, really nurture this. You gotta water that plant. I gotta water that plant. Yeah.
- [31:57]
A
God, this podcast.
- [32:00]
B
I mean, vagina. Did you guys.
- [32:06]
C
Did you say, I don't even know what to do with you at this point. I don't even know what.
- [32:15]
B
It's Pride Month.
- [32:18]
C
You can't get out of every. Every situation with it's Pride Month. You did that at Christmas.
- [32:26]
B
It's the one month I can get away with this.
- [32:29]
A
I've been waiting. I was waiting for a Fortune Marie, but Fortune Marie There we go. Yeah.
- [32:35]
B
In Dublin, they had prod flags all over the city. That was pretty cool.
- [32:39]
C
That doesn't get you out of trouble with me, though.
- [32:43]
B
That's fine.
- [32:50]
C
In partnership with Airbnb, let's talk about our spring travel plans. Fortune. I feel like every summer my family gets a little bit more adventurous with our travel plans, but there's a hitch.
- [33:02]
B
Oh, yeah? What might that be?
- [33:04]
C
They're now getting really into competitive sports, and that means we're now traveling around their team schedules.
- [33:11]
B
Hmm, let me guess. They're having you stay in a bare bones hotel on the side of a highway somewhere.
- [33:16]
C
That's right. So for the next big weekend, we decided to mix things up and find a home on Airbnb to stay at instead. We found a place with a massive yard so they could keep playing baseball with their pals on the team day and night. Plus, it's got a pool, unlike the hotel we were supposed to stay at. It's even got a tree house.
- [33:37]
B
Wow, that sounds incredible. But I have one important question for you. Is there a hot tub?
- [33:44]
C
Oh, Fortune, there is indeed a hot tub. So maybe after the boys go to bed, Stephanie and I will have some tub time together. And that's what I love about finding a place on Airbnb. Instead of being trapped in our room, we get this whole unique experience. So if you're listening, go check out Airbnb and have your own adventure.
- [34:05]
A
Summer always makes me rethink what I'm reaching for every day. Lighter fabrics, better materials. Pieces that just feel good the moment you put them on and look effortless. That's why I keep coming back to Quince. They focus on high quality essentials. Think breathable linen, soft, organic cotton, washable silk, but without the luxury markup. It's that rare balance where everything feels elevated but still easy.
- [34:28]
C
Quince has beautiful everyday pieces, like 100% European linen pants, dresses and tops with styles starting at $32. Quince works directly with ethical factories and cuts out the middlemen. So you're paying for quality, not brand markup. I got a pair of Quince's linen pants and they're my new favorite. They're so light and breezy and great to wear out or just around the house.
- [34:54]
A
Elevate your summer wardrobe. Go to quince.comhandsome for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. Now available in Canada too. That's quince.comhandsome for free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince.comhandsome I love Dublin, but I Thought
- [35:13]
B
that was very progressive of them.
- [35:15]
C
Yeah.
- [35:15]
A
I took my parents to Dublin, actually.
- [35:17]
B
The airports. Oh, yeah. How was that?
- [35:20]
A
I took them to an escape room. It was their first ever escape room, and they could not wrap their head around the fact that they were on the same. That we were all on the same team trying to get out of this room together. It was like. Like, my mom would find a clue and be like. And, like, hide it from my dad and be like, I'm working on this one. I. I found the code. I know I'm not gonna give it to you. It was like, no, we're trying to all get out on a clock.
- [35:39]
C
We're all, oh, I didn't know you do that in a group.
- [35:42]
B
Yeah, you're. Yeah, you're. Which is nice, because some people have different skills. Yeah. Where, you know, some people are better at clues, and some people are better at, like, searching for things.
- [35:55]
A
Yeah.
- [35:55]
B
I passed by one in Berlin on the way to my show, and I thought about, you may. But I was like, well, there's no way I could do it in Berlin because it'd probably be in German, and I would definitely get stuck the entire time.
- [36:08]
A
Oh, man. There's some in. In, like, Eastern Europe. That's where Escape Room started. And there's some that are really dark and immersive, where it's like you're in an abandoned insane asylum, and there's live actors and. Yeah. I would pay anything to watch you and your mom try to escape a room. Not in a. Not a really scary one.
- [36:28]
B
But I don't know if I could count on her for much.
- [36:31]
A
It's not.
- [36:32]
B
Because even in a hotel, we'd be in a hotel room, and she'd be like, I don't know how to work the lights. And I was like, me. I said, what did you. Did you put. Did you push the button? No, I just know. I don't know how to work them. I go, can you just try? Like. Can you just, like, turn the knob and see what happens? I guess so. She just, like, wouldn't even touch it. She's like, I don't know how to do it.
- [36:58]
A
Did you share a hotel room?
- [37:00]
B
God, no.
- [37:01]
A
Okay.
- [37:02]
B
I mean, I'm sure I broke even on my tour because of it, but I. I need. If I'm. I was so. It was so much traveling, I needed to sleep, and sharing a room would not have provided that to me.
- [37:18]
C
So you could have easily gone to sleep in your room, and your mom could have been up all night with her lights on bright and her shades open, not knowing how to work anything.
- [37:27]
B
Oh, yeah. I couldn't do it. I couldn't do it. So I. We got separate rooms now.
- [37:32]
C
I have to go back. May.
- [37:34]
B
Yeah.
- [37:35]
C
What would you give to see me alone getting out of an escape room? That was spooky.
- [37:42]
A
I know that you have some claustrophobia. And I would. I would. If you just a lot. So if you curled up in a ball and just were trying to wait it out, that would be so heartbreaking to see. I'd like to see the three of us try to get out. Or you and Stephanie and Max and Finn would be pretty funny because I feel like Max and Finn would be incredible.
- [38:01]
C
So wait, you're locked in a room?
- [38:03]
A
Yeah. You're locked. Well, but it's an emergency.
- [38:05]
B
Tiny room. Is it?
- [38:07]
C
No, it's any size room.
- [38:09]
A
Yeah. You're not.
- [38:10]
C
Any windows?
- [38:11]
A
No, usually not. No. No, never mind.
- [38:14]
C
You couldn't. Often.
- [38:14]
A
The room that you'll. There'll be like a bookcase and then you'll solve a clue. Opens. There's a whole other.
- [38:20]
C
I'm in.
- [38:20]
A
Yeah. That was authentic.
- [38:23]
B
Sorry, what the. But what about the bookcase?
- [38:25]
A
Oh, just like. Usually the room leads to other rooms and things and things like that.
- [38:29]
C
If you can get out.
- [38:30]
A
So you're never gonna do one with.
- [38:32]
C
Yeah, no.
- [38:32]
A
Yeah. Yeah, that's fair. Yeah. No, I always really respect who. I forget who it was. I texted maybe. Maybe it was Alison, Brie, and. Yeah. Dave, Franco. And I said, do you guys want to do an escape room? And she was like, I can't think of anything worse. No, she was like, I love her honesty. And I really. I was like. She was like, I can't think of anything I want to do less than be locked in a room in a high pressure environment. And I was like, great.
- [38:57]
B
Thank you for asking. Coffee it is.
- [38:59]
A
Ye.
- [39:02]
C
See you at the Coffee Bean.
- [39:03]
B
Oh, man. Well, should we get to our question?
- [39:07]
A
Yes. I'm excited. I love this band. I met them at the Junos just a few months ago when I was hosting, and we got. We did a little bit together where I was kind of the dynamic was me, like, pathetically trying to become a part of their band.
- [39:23]
B
And their band's pretty cool.
- [39:25]
A
They're cool as hell.
- [39:26]
B
Really cool. They got. They got two queer members and two straighties.
- [39:30]
A
Love that.
- [39:31]
B
Love that.
- [39:32]
C
That's like us.
- [39:34]
B
Yeah, exactly.
- [39:35]
A
Yeah. Me and Tom. Straight. Oh, no, you're straight. Sorry.
- [39:38]
B
Yeah.
- [39:38]
A
Yeah.
- [39:38]
B
All right. Today's question is brought to you by
- [39:44]
A
AT T. Today's question Askers are a Canadian rock band who've won multiple Juno awards, including the past three years in a row for Music Group of the Year. Their latest album is titled no Hard Feelings. The Beaches are asking today's question, I
- [40:01]
B
will say, about their band. They're very popular, but they're having a cool, like, boost right now because of this show called Off Campus. I think I told May about it.
- [40:13]
A
Let me fill Tig in. This is Fortune's new favorite show because it's hot college age. People having drama and fucking and you know, Fortune Love's like a glossy sort of youth drama.
- [40:27]
C
I know Fortune loves a charcuterie board. So this is like college charcuterie.
- [40:33]
B
Yeah, I watched it all. It's a hockey team and they're, you know, just up to the things that. You're up already. No, that's a get. That was a gay hockey show. This is straight, like Fortune College. Yeah. And they're just like boning and it's shirtless and yeah, everyone's good looking and it's the hot new show right now. And Beaches and had a song on it that's like popped off, as the kids say. G flip Friend of the pod also had a song pop off. And so I love seeing these queer folks getting this mainstream success. It's very cool. But, yeah, that's the hot show right now. Guys. I. I just have my finger on the pulse of pop culture. I don't know what to tell you. I still watch the entire series of my that Summer I Turned Pretty.
- [41:30]
C
I'm still enjoying my new life of waking up from a coma every day when I'm not on. Now that I'm not on social media,
- [41:38]
B
I will say this.
- [41:39]
A
Don't know what the hell's going on.
- [41:40]
C
I don't know what's happening. And it's.
- [41:42]
A
You don't know who's popping off. I don't know who's not popping off,
- [41:44]
C
popping on or off.
- [41:45]
B
I will say this. The girl that's very popular to show her name in real life is Mika. And next season is going to be focused on her character. I played her mom, Margaret Cho, and I played her lesbian moms in a movie called Sex Appeal. And I had never played a mom before and I did not know how to do this or to relate or to be motherly. So my version of trying to be nurturing to my on screen daughter was I would buy her a latte in the morning and I was like, here you go. And that. I felt that was my.
- [42:24]
A
That was you getting engaged.
- [42:25]
B
Motherly, nurturing.
- [42:27]
C
So here's your coffee drink. I love it.
- [42:30]
B
She's awesome. I'm so happy for her that she's having this. This success. It's really cool. Anywho, back to the widdles.
- [42:38]
A
We haven't heard the question yet.
- [42:39]
B
We haven't? No.
- [42:40]
A
I just should. Okay.
- [42:42]
B
Shout out to the beaches and off campus. Yeah.
- [42:45]
C
And all. They're popping off with their pop off.
- [42:47]
B
Everyone's popping off.
- [42:48]
A
When are we gonna pop off?
- [42:49]
B
Just like vaginas.
- [42:51]
C
Oh, Jesus.
- [42:53]
A
Fortune.
- [42:54]
C
Marie Fortune.
- [42:57]
B
Hey, it's the beaches.
- [42:59]
A
I'm Leandra. I'm Eliza. I'm Jordan and this is Conan.
- [43:02]
C
I'm Kylie. And our question for you is what
- [43:05]
A
is your favorite queer bar?
- [43:07]
B
Ooh,
- [43:09]
C
queer bar.
- [43:10]
B
Well, I will say there's not many. I know they said queer bar, but as far as lesbian bars, there ain't many in the U.S. yes.
- [43:18]
A
It's crazy. There's actual like stats of how under 20 or something.
- [43:23]
B
Right?
- [43:23]
A
Crazy.
- [43:24]
B
Yeah.
- [43:24]
A
My friend's opening one.
- [43:26]
B
Good.
- [43:27]
A
Yeah. In like South Carolina. Yeah.
- [43:30]
C
Wow.
- [43:31]
B
I have a number of favorites.
- [43:33]
A
And yeah, they have a dog, the beaches. Have a dog called Conan.
- [43:37]
B
Let's. I love it. Love it.
- [43:39]
A
Yeah.
- [43:40]
B
What's your favorite? Tig.
- [43:41]
A
Yeah.
- [43:42]
C
Well, when I first moved to Los Angeles, I got a job at Little Frida's coffee shop, which is where they had a night or not nightly, a Thursday night stand up show. And so I thought if I work behind the coffee bar, I can be sure to be around to get on that stage. And. And then it just also ended up becoming my, you know, door to a social life. And right across the street from Little Frida's coffee shop was the Normandy Room. Did you ever go there?
- [44:19]
B
I remember that. Yeah.
- [44:20]
C
Yeah. The Normandy Room was just like so low key. They had two pool tables and like a bar and maybe a jukebox. Like, it just was. That's it. There was no dance floor. It's really just sit at the bar, have a drink, play pool.
- [44:37]
B
Very chill.
- [44:38]
C
Yeah. Really chill. So it was. It was just part of my routine of even after I didn't work at Little Frida's, the Normandy Room was the bar that I like to go to because it was very tiny.
- [44:53]
A
Yeah.
- [44:53]
C
And.
- [44:53]
A
And very lit.
- [44:55]
C
Yeah. It was just such a perfect little. I don't even know if it would. I don't know that it's a dive bar, but it just kind of had a similar vibe to a little hole in the wall kind of place. And yeah, it wasn't over the top at all loved it.
- [45:12]
B
Yeah, it was a good one.
- [45:14]
A
How about you Fortune?
- [45:16]
B
Well, my favorite queer bar used to be. These are on the past Oil Can Harry's in LA was like my mecca for many years. It was a gay country western bar.
- [45:28]
C
Yeah.
- [45:28]
B
That was there for decades and I still am sad it no longer exists.
- [45:33]
C
But yeah, it's wild.
- [45:35]
B
I would country line dance and two step there for years and the seeing those beautiful gay men twirl each other around was like breathtaking. I think that Dallas has a one called Stampede so I have to check that out. But you know as far as let. There's. I love a couple lesbian bars. The Cubby Hole in New York. Really cool bar. Very, very, very tiny. That's still open. That's still open. Yeah. I believe Henrietta's as well. So I love seeing that there's a space like that. The May you went to the Nashville one. That's really cool. Lipstick Lounge.
- [46:13]
A
I loved that. I actually. I might say. I might say that one. Yeah. My two favorite when we were there. Yeah. In Nashville. Yeah. Karaoke with Thomas and that actor from Orange is a New Black was there. Laura Prepon. That was. Yeah that. I really liked that bar.
- [46:32]
B
That's a good one. Nashville also has. I don't know if it's still there but play was a really good one. Fun. A lot of fun. Drag shows.
- [46:42]
C
Salt Lake City, weirdly enough around.
- [46:44]
A
Yes.
- [46:45]
B
Seriously. On tour I've toured for 17 years. Back in my single days I would always go to the gay bars.
- [46:52]
C
I've toured longer than that and I didn't know.
- [46:55]
B
Well, you're just a real footy daddy, aren't you?
- [46:57]
C
I really am. I guess so I just taking walks and looking for vegan food.
- [47:03]
A
So would you go like sit at the bar and like. Like see who's around?
- [47:08]
B
Back in my Chelsea lately days people would, you know, because Chelsea was a vibe, like a party vibe, drinking vibe.
- [47:15]
C
People would come to my Chelsea Handler.
- [47:17]
B
Yes, I know that's hard to believe.
- [47:19]
C
Interesting.
- [47:20]
B
People would come to our any of our shows that were on the show expecting us to want to like throw down. Now I'm. I'm not a big throw downer but those I was back then I was single and you know on a there for the weekend doing shows and so usually people would come to the shows and be like come to the gay bar. And I would just be like why not? So I don't really do that much at all and it's been many years since I've done that. But back in my Day I. And I would love to go to drag. Drag shows were my favorite. I would love to go to, like, the local gay bar and see a drag show. So, yeah, I hit up the gay bar in Salt Lake City. I believe it's closed now because some of them kind of come and go and others are institutions. It just really depends. But that's why our community, it's important for us to support these spaces.
- [48:07]
A
Yeah. My two favorites in my 20s that were really. There was a bar called the Beaver in Toronto. I don't know.
- [48:16]
B
Yeah, Mamrie.
- [48:19]
A
It was so Beaver Marie. It was really. Maybe it was just the time of my life that I was at, but it felt like it was like, kind of grungy and they would have cool events and people were always like, fucking in the bathroom or fights. Would have like. It was a little. It was great. And they had a little back patio and you could hang out there. So I missed that. That closed. But there's a lot of pictures of me with very plucked eyebrows and very skinny jeans and bleached hair just being
- [48:48]
B
like, hey, what's up?
- [48:49]
A
In like a plaid shirt? Like a little.
- [48:52]
C
Sounds like me.
- [48:53]
A
Yeah.
- [48:55]
C
Can I just say, speaking of a plaid shirt.
- [48:58]
A
Yeah.
- [48:58]
C
I went and got a massage the other day in Toronto and I go in in my just regular black and white flannel. Okay.
- [49:09]
B
Yeah, yeah.
- [49:10]
C
I'm in Canada. Yeah, right. I go in to get a massage. A gay guy is behind the counter and he's. And he goes, oh, my God, I love your sweater. And I was like, this is the. I was like, this is a flannel. And he was like, I love it. Isn't that a very common look in Canada, the red and black flannel?
- [49:35]
A
Yeah. Maybe like recognized you and sort of didn't know what to know.
- [49:41]
C
Maybe. And he didn't realize he recognized me, but he could not get over my quote unquote sweater.
- [49:46]
A
I was like, I love that.
- [49:47]
C
How am I not the epitome of a gay guy's joke about a lesbian that I walk in in a flannel and he's trying to make it a sweater. Anyway, it was very bizarre. Go ahead back to gay bars.
- [50:01]
A
Well, that one's. Yeah, that one's closed now. So, yeah, I'm going to go Nashville lipstick lounge. But that feeling when you first got come out and you first go to like. Yeah. Where. Where you can fully be yourself and you know that there's a real chance that people are pulling and hooking up and it's like, oh, my God. It's not like, yeah, like pulling, you know, you can pull someone.
- [50:22]
C
Oh, okay, I see.
- [50:23]
A
Yeah. Because otherwise you go to a bar and it's like, all right, is there. Who else is here?
- [50:30]
C
There is a lesbian bar in Austin when I lived there called Hollywood.
- [50:36]
B
Hollywood.
- [50:37]
C
Hollywood.
- [50:40]
B
I'm trying to think where else I've been. San Francisco one had a. Something called Lookout. I like that one. Oh, the Stonewall Inn in New York is very iconic, obviously from our, our history. Chicago has a really great gay scene because they have a whole area called Boys Town. That's their gay area. And the Sidetracks is a very popular gay bar there. That's really fortune.
- [51:12]
A
Yeah, this is wild fortune. This is. You've listed like 50.
- [51:16]
B
I support our community. Come on now.
- [51:19]
C
I support our community, but.
- [51:20]
B
No, you don't. You're not supporting them like I do.
- [51:24]
C
I know, I'm just.
- [51:25]
B
Also in Chicago, there's these lesbians that I'm friends with, own a tavern called Whiskey Girl Tavern. Shout out to them. And that's a great place to hang too. There's a lot of great places. I think. I just, you know, I, even though I'm older and I don't hang out at the bars as much. Oh, Atlanta has, has something Mary's. Oh, let me look it up because I like that one a lot too.
- [51:52]
C
They should call a bar something Mary's because it'll sound like you're trying to remember the name every time.
- [51:58]
A
Something.
- [51:59]
B
I think it's just called Mary, but that one's really great. But yeah, I just, you know, I liked it when I was on tour because it just was always such a positive, great vibe. Like it was always like happy and like accepting and you felt safe.
- [52:18]
A
And there's a bar called High and you could pull in la. You can.
- [52:23]
C
Oh yeah, High Tops.
- [52:25]
A
It's like. Yeah, High Tops is like a, a queer sports bar. Like a lesbian sports bar, which is cool.
- [52:31]
B
Yeah. Akbar has a great stand up show that for years that Bruce Daniels and Aaron Foley have produced. That's a really great one.
- [52:40]
C
That's where I've ever done that. Oh, it's.
- [52:43]
B
It was iconic. It's where I kind of cut my teeth with stand up. And back then it would be like Karen Kilgariff and Wanda Sykes and Paige Hurwitz.
- [52:53]
C
And that show still happens at Akbar, I believe.
- [52:55]
B
It's maybe not every week, but it still happens. Yeah, I just saw Wanda there a
- [52:59]
C
couple months ago doing an open mic, just.
- [53:02]
B
Yeah. Working out material. It's a great place to work stuff out, but there's so many great bars, I don't want to bring it down. But my very, very first headliner gig after last comic standing was at Pulse Orlando.
- [53:19]
A
No way. Wow. Wow.
- [53:22]
B
Really incredible club. The owners were so nice. And right before what happened, I had run into one of the owners at a Human Rights Campaign event in Columbus, and they're like, you gotta come. Come back. And I was like, yeah. And it was like, months later that happened, which I. That experience really rocked me. Just because of, you know, for gay people.
- [53:46]
C
Yeah.
- [53:47]
B
I mean, in general, it's terrible, but, like, for gay people, the gay bars were our only space for so many decades for, you know, gay people to be able to be themselves, to be out, to, like, love freely, because for so long you couldn't. And. Yeah, so that. So the. A gay bar. A gay space was like, that is our. That our little. That's for us. You know, that's our thing.
- [54:12]
C
Yeah.
- [54:13]
B
And then obviously, over the years, it's evolved, and now you got a lot of straight bachelorette parties at these gay bars, and it's a whole different scene. You know, I was friends at some cool places.
- [54:25]
C
I was just in Orlando for an event, and they were, you know, it was memorializing. Yeah, yeah, it was. It was really intense. Beautiful.
- [54:39]
A
When that happened, I went to a vigil in Toronto in the. In the gay district for Pulse. And I forgot about my favorite queer bar in the world.
- [54:49]
B
Sweaty Betty's.
- [54:50]
A
Yeah, Sweaty Betty's on Ossington. That's tiny and glows red. And it's like they. They are really generous with their pores. And I've had a lot of first dates there.
- [55:03]
C
Oh, I love that there are any last dates there.
- [55:06]
A
I'm sure. First and last.
- [55:09]
B
I do like that the lesbians are starting to open up more of those sports bars. That's starting to be more of a thing. And I think a lot of them are doing well.
- [55:18]
A
Yeah.
- [55:19]
B
Because lesbians notoriously don't go out, especially after they couple up. And that's kind of. What do you mean? So, I mean, it's. It is true that once lesbians find a partner, they get cozy going out. They get cozy. They want to, you know, be at home and cook dinner and watch movies and cuddle and just gay it up, you know, and they don't go because they would go to the bars trying to find somebody. And so I. That is part of why a lot of the lesbian bars don't end up surviving.
- [55:55]
A
But sports, that.
- [55:57]
B
Sports, that's where they're learning is kind of the niche there is that lesbians even in a couple still love sports.
- [56:05]
A
Sports.
- [56:06]
C
See now I'm not going to be able to. I'm not going to be able to get Stephanie to come home.
- [56:10]
A
Yeah, that's true.
- [56:12]
B
Sports bar, that High Tops bar that may mention serves corn dogs.
- [56:19]
A
Really?
- [56:20]
B
Yes. I don't need. If I'm going there for anything, it's a corn dog.
- [56:27]
A
I just went there for Atlanta Johnston's birthday and it was perfect. It wasn't too crowded and no one was really dancing and then a Spice Girl song came on and we all just intensely danced for just the duration of that song. Then sat down, kept going with our convos.
- [56:43]
C
What was the song?
- [56:44]
A
Spice up youp Life. Clown to the world. Spice up your life. Every boy and every girl. Spice up your life.
- [56:50]
C
Never heard it. Now should we hear their. Their answer?
- [56:55]
A
Yeah.
- [56:55]
B
Yeah.
- [56:56]
A
I'll just say I'm really excited for the World Cup Cup Soccer.
- [56:59]
C
Oh yeah.
- [56:59]
B
The World cup is very exciting.
- [57:01]
A
We. We gotta watch.
- [57:03]
B
Are you gonna go to any games?
- [57:05]
A
I don't. I think I prefer to watch it at. At home. I can see the sweat.
- [57:09]
C
You gotta go to the lesbian bar and watch it.
- [57:13]
B
That's actually a great idea to that. Thank you.
- [57:16]
A
When it gets down to the finals especially. Yeah.
- [57:19]
B
There is nothing I. The men's World cup is exciting but for me I'm a huge women's saga fan and when it is World cup time or Olympic time, I am up in one of those bars. Hardcore. I love it. I'm a person that wakes up at like 5:30 in the morning to see them play.
- [57:36]
C
Yeah.
- [57:37]
A
Anyway, let's hear what the beaches have
- [57:40]
B
been real chatty today. Sorry. I love it.
- [57:43]
C
Lord, you sure have nice.
- [57:48]
A
Thanks.
- [57:48]
C
Stuck in Europe knowing speech or language
- [57:51]
B
and no one to talk to but myself and my mom for two weeks.
- [57:57]
C
Wait, when did you get home? Like how long?
- [57:59]
B
Three days ago.
- [58:01]
C
Okay. Yeah, we really took the brunt of it. All right, let's hear. Let's hear their answer.
- [58:09]
A
We have a couple of favorites.
- [58:10]
B
New York Gingers, LA Honeys, Toronto.
- [58:13]
A
Three dollar bill. I have a story about honeys that. When you want to hear it?
- [58:18]
B
Yeah, sure.
- [58:20]
C
Please come with us.
- [58:23]
A
When I was first dating Parv and I was like I want to take her to like a queer party. And I took her to Honey's and it was so crowded and hot but it was fun there. But I guess we're dancing a bit. We made out a bit and we ended up leaving that night. Parv got A DM from a stranger that was like, hi, Parvati. I hate to be the one to tell you this. This is going to be hard to hear, but I saw maybe making out with someone at Honey's tonight and Barb was like, yeah, that was me. Weirdo. Yeah.
- [58:56]
C
I can't believe she wrote back.
- [58:59]
A
Wow.
- [59:00]
C
I think I was like right back.
- [59:03]
B
You were getting. You were getting checked.
- [59:05]
A
I know.
- [59:06]
B
Like, yeah, yeah, that's hilarious. Not be up to any bad stuff.
- [59:13]
A
Yeah, that could have been like a Shakespearean misunderstanding.
- [59:17]
C
Nothing worse than a Shakespearean misunderstanding.
- [59:21]
B
There is a truly girl. You're right. There's man fortune misunderstanding.
- [59:28]
C
Good.
- [59:29]
B
No, thank you.
- [59:31]
A
Or remember when Romeo didn't get that
- [59:34]
C
letter explaining do I remember?
- [59:37]
B
He died as a result. They both died. And it was just one big misunderstanding.
- [59:43]
C
Shakespearean misunderstanding. Merch alert.
- [59:52]
B
Oh, you guys.
- [59:55]
C
Wait, is that a saying? A Shakespearean misunderstanding?
- [59:58]
A
I don't think so. It's just a trend now, kid.
- [60:00]
C
It is now, kid. It is now.
- [60:02]
B
I have heard. I haven't heard of gingers in New York or three dollar bill in Toronto. Have you? Do you know of three dollar bill in Toronto? No, no.
- [60:12]
A
Tig, go tonight.
- [60:13]
B
And by the way, the phrases queer. Emma's. Queer is a two dollar bill. Is that what they used to say?
- [60:21]
C
No, queer is a three dollar bill.
- [60:23]
B
It was three. I thought it was two.
- [60:25]
C
No two in that queer. Because they exist.
- [60:28]
A
Do they?
- [60:29]
C
Wait, is it a two or three? Thomas, can you.
- [60:32]
B
Who is not queer.
- [60:34]
C
Can you google that up?
- [60:36]
B
Three queer. Queer than a two dollar. I thought it was.
- [60:40]
A
It's three dollar bill because there's no such thing as the three dollar.
- [60:43]
B
Well, whatever, whatever.
- [60:46]
C
Does that mean that queer people that we're not. There's no such thing as us. If you take it.
- [60:55]
B
I'm queer than a three dollar bill.
- [60:57]
C
So $3 bills don't exist and therefore we don't either. We need to drop that saying.
- [61:03]
B
Well, Tig, I think that after your vegan meal tonight, you should walk over to $3bill, wherever it is.
- [61:10]
C
Go in a new play.
- [61:11]
A
Like, go in your flannel sweater.
- [61:13]
B
You'd be like.
- [61:15]
C
But I mean, what would happen if I just went in alone to the three dollar bill?
- [61:21]
A
You'd be mobbed.
- [61:22]
B
I'll have a. I'll just have a water, no ice.
- [61:28]
A
Yeah, you go. Can someone else order a glass of wine? I'll have a sip.
- [61:34]
C
Oh my gosh.
- [61:35]
B
You know, we all have our lanes.
- [61:37]
C
We do. And I'm forever stuck in mine. Gladly though.
- [61:43]
B
Ye. Yeah, you're happy that's all that matters.
- [61:46]
C
Happily.
- [61:46]
B
And listen, I'm too old to be hanging out at the gay bars all the time. Or any bar.
- [61:51]
C
It's not even.
- [61:51]
B
Just not even a gay bar. Just any bar. I walk into a bar now, and it's so loud, and I'm just like, oh, my God.
- [61:58]
C
You know, we have to put on the list is a top secret camera situation that follows each of us separately, alone into a gay bar.
- [62:09]
B
Oh, my God. Yeah.
- [62:11]
C
And see how that. That goes down.
- [62:13]
B
That would be pretty funny, actually.
- [62:15]
C
Yeah, it would be so funny. Why isn't somebody making a TV show of our list?
- [62:21]
B
Tig just walks in and walked right back out surrounded by people.
- [62:29]
C
I did this venue. Where was I? Albany. I was in Albany. And the venue is called the Egg. And.
- [62:37]
B
Oh, yeah, I've been there.
- [62:39]
C
You perform there. Okay. So the guy. This guy was like, have you. Have you been to the Egg? And I said, I don't know. And he said, oh, you would know. It's in the shape of an egg. And I said, well, honestly, sir, I do feel like I could wander in and out of an egg and not even realize it. So. But when I did leave the show, because I came in, you know, some weird back entrance and, you know, nothing looked too weird inside. And then I walked out the front door when I left, and I looked back and I was like, well, I'll be damned. That is the shape of an. It is really, really great crowds there.
- [63:18]
B
But anyway, any hoosers?
- [63:20]
C
Any hoosers? It was wonderful to see you all and wonderful to see you head on out to Colorado Springs on July 16th to see me. I'll be also in Calgary. I'll be in Oklahoma City, Cincinnati, Charleston, West Virginia. Fresno, Napa. All the big cities of the United States and Canada right now, hitting those minor markets still. And, man, the audiences are just so friendly and great. And I'm very thankful.
- [63:59]
B
I am. Just added a ton of new dates. And starting in August, I'm going to be in West Hampton, New York. Then I'll be at the Foxwood Casino in Connecticut. Red Bank, New Jersey. Halifax, Canada. August 14th 15th. Provincetown, Massachusetts. Pretty gay there. Greenville, South Carolina. Wilmington, North Carolina. Boise, Portland, Oregon. Austin, Dayton, Durham, Denver, Louisville. Bunch of places are coming.
- [64:31]
A
I just want people to come to Guelph on July 17th. Guelph, Ontario. I'm gonna play my whole album with a band at Hillside Festival. And then on July 18th and 19th, I think I'm. I'm at. I'm in Yellowknife in the Northwest Territories. If you've ever wanted to see that midnight sun, I'm gonna play the whole album there as well. So come, come hang out.
- [64:58]
B
Love it.
- [64:59]
C
Yeah. Heck yeah. Heck yeah. Also, make sure to rate, review, subscribe, YouTube, wherever you get your podcasts. And also check us out on Hulu. We are available the day before.
- [65:14]
B
The day before our regular release.
- [65:16]
C
Yep. Check us out on Hulu and also go to handsomepod.com for all of our wonderful merch. We do have some good ones.
- [65:24]
B
Yeah, we do.
- [65:25]
C
And until next time, keep it handsome. Handsome is hosted by me, Tig Notaro, May Martin, and Fortune Feamster. The show is produced, recorded and edited by Thomas Willette. Email us@handomepodmail.com follow us on social media at HandsomePod.
- [65:49]
B
What a podcast.
- [65:51]
A
What a podcast. That was a headgum podcast.
- [65:58]
B
Checking Allstate first could save you hundreds on car insurance. Not checking that. I brought my good running shoes when I went out on tour. That was rough. I like to go on long walks when I'm in a new city, but I didn't bring the right footwear and my dogs were barking.
- [66:12]
A
Yeah, check in first is Handsome. So check Allstate first for an auto quote. Could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings vary subject to terms, conditions and availability. Allstate North American Insurance Company and Affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois. Hi, I am Mandy Moore.
- [66:27]
B
Sterling K. Brown. And I'm Chris Sullivan. And we host the podcast that Was Us now on Head Gun.
- [66:33]
C
Each episode, we're gonna go into a deep dive from our show.
- [66:36]
B
This is us.
- [66:37]
A
That's right.
- [66:37]
C
We're gonna go episode by episode. We're also gonna pepper in episodes with different guest stars and writers and casting directors.
- [66:46]
B
Are we gonna cry?
- [66:47]
A
Yes.
- [66:48]
C
Little bit.
- [66:48]
B
Are we gonna laugh? A whole lot.
- [66:49]
A
A lot.
- [66:50]
B
A whole lot. That's what I'm hoping, man.
- [66:52]
C
Listen to.
- [66:53]
B
That was us on your favorite podcast app. Or watch full video episodes on YouTube or Spotify.
- [66:59]
A
New episodes every Tuesday.