101: Getting Divorced AGAIN?! w/ Cara Connors

Summary

Podcast Summary: Happy Wife, Happy Life

Episode 101: "Getting Divorced AGAIN?!" w/ Cara Connors

Hosts: Kendahl Landreth & Jordan Myrick
Guest: Cara Connors
Date: March 9, 2026

---

Main Theme

This episode explores the emotional, practical, and comedic sides of ending long-term relationships—specifically, navigating breakups and "gay divorce"—with recurring guest, comedian Cara Connors. The hosts and Cara reflect on endings, healing, dating post-breakup, and how to support friends through heartache, all with their signature blend of candor and humor.

---

Episode Breakdown

1. Cara’s Relationship History & Current Status

• (01:04–03:01)

  • Cara is the show’s first repeat guest, previously discussing her straight divorce.
  • She shares that her recent (six months ago) long-term engagement with a woman ended—an emotional “gay divorce,” though not technically a divorce.
  • Cara discusses healing:

    “Healing is not linear, and that is something that I've really been embracing.” —Cara (01:39)

  • She credits the breakup for helping her find new personal strength (even doing two pull-ups!):

    “I honestly think that this breakup kind of just like propelled me and tapped into some new strength...” —Cara (02:11)

• (03:01–03:50)

  • Comparing the pain of her “straight divorce” to her “gay divorce”:

    “There's no question. The gay divorce is the hardest thing I've ever dealt with… There's absolutely no question.” —Cara (03:03)

  • Less logistical hassle than her marriage, but far more painful emotionally.
  • Cara is “on the market” but still feeling the process of healing.

---

2. Dating Again: Raya, Types, & Setups

• (03:50–07:59)

  • Cara shares her friend paid for a month of the elite dating app Raya—

    “I don't actually think that anyone is ever gonna match. Like, it just feels extremely fake.” —Cara (04:16)

  • Discussion on who gets on Raya and stories about spotting (maybe) celebrities.
  • Cara admits to hearting a famous queer A-lister:

    “I hearted them.” —Cara (06:41) “And did they heart you back?”
    “Not yet.” —Kendahl & Cara (06:42–06:44)

  • On her “type,” Cara jokes about tall WNBA players and being a third in a throuple:

    “I wouldn't mind being with, like, a tall ass, like, WNBA player.” —Cara (06:52) “Would you be a third? Like, would you date Jordan and I?...” —Kendahl (07:09) “I don't want to be a third... I would have sex with a couple, but... I don't think that is what my heart needs right now.” —Cara (07:19)

• (07:32–13:18)

  • Cara prefers someone local, possibly in the industry but not a performer, someone funny and patient.
  • Hosts and Cara analyze the dynamic of personality types in relationships (the “Kendall and Jordan” archetype).
  • Reflections on online dating profiles and how true personality doesn’t always translate online:

    “I need people, like—that's my new thing: I want my close friends to set me up.” —Cara (12:01)

  • Humorous riffing about what their dating profiles would reveal and misconceptions based on outward presentation.

---

3. Breakups, Divorce Advice & Moving On

• (14:04–19:13)

  • Advice to a listener on starting a divorce after 13 years together:
    • Have direct communication; practical logistics may differ based on location (Cara’s experience in Canada involved mandatory mediation and lawyers).

    “I was, like, researching it... each person is legally required to have a lawyer. That's a thing?... It can move pretty quick if you are determined and your ex is a lawyer, you can really get it done.” —Cara (17:20)

    • Let go where possible to avoid protracted, draining legal battles:

    “Just let it go. You can make more money, you can do other stuff, and maybe next time around, get a prenup.” —Cara (18:10)

• (19:44–23:40)

  • “Is it normal to feel like I’m dying?” post-breakup:

    “I think that that is very normal... If you don’t feel like you’re dying, maybe it wasn’t really there.” —Cara (19:53)

  • The group discusses how breakups feel especially brutal when there was no clear bad action/injustice.
  • Kendahl shares philosophy of always having your own hobbies, friends, and support system outside of a partner:

    “You should always be checking in with yourself... If my partner dumped me tomorrow, would I have friends, would I have hobbies, would I be able to function?” —Kendahl (21:48)

---

4. Situationships & Casual Dating

• (24:10–28:08)
  • Advice to someone frustrated by a new partner’s slow pace post-breakup:

    “Date other people casually at the same time. ... You can’t rush that process for somebody else... put your brain into or focus it on something else.” —Cara (24:10)

  • The hosts reminisce about youthful urgency to settle down, countered by the reality that single life can feel lonely or challenging, not just glamorous or freeing.
  • Discussion of “romanticizing” the single life while in relationships, and vice versa.

---

5. Dating as an Adult; First Dates, First Loves, Breakup Sex

• (28:08–37:08)

  • Honest and funny stories about bad post-breakup dates—including Kendahl’s infamous “middle school parking lot” hookup and subsequent sobbing.
  • Cara says she’s been more cautious this time around:

    “That's why I've been like very cautious... let me have close friends set me up. Like, I'm not in a rush...” —Cara (30:26)

  • On supporting friends through breakups/divorce:

    “I think for myself, it is like, people answering the phone… being nice to me... Checking in.” —Cara (31:51)

    • Both hosts and Cara agree: let your friend set the “tone” for check-ins, but reminders they're loved/help is available are always good.

• (33:48–36:16)

  • On breakup/rebound sex:

    "Absolutely not. No... Access denied, the door's closed. I never do that." —Cara (33:51)

    • Hosts agree that it’s not a good idea if your goal is “peace and stability.”

• (37:08–39:12)

  • Tangent about exes “disappearing” from social media and speculation about their lives post-breakup; imagining an “Icelandic-style registry” for the lesbian community to avoid awkward overlaps.

---

6. Lingering Feelings, Player/Non-Player, Saying 'I Love You'

• (39:54–44:33)

  • To the listener who worries they'll "always care" about someone they loved:

    “I don't know if you ever stop... I still love that person. I want everything for that person. But I don't think it's going to feel the same way... Time heals.” —Cara (42:31)

    • It's normal to retain some affection for past loves, but the feeling evolves or becomes neutral.

• (44:39–46:46)

  • Cara on not being a “player,” but being “sexually open”:

    “I'm not a player, but I am sexually open.” —Cara (44:42) "I can have fun and, like, date people... but I'm not a player. I keep it all above board." —Cara (45:03)

    • Discuss nuances of “player” behavior, honesty, and different definitions within queer dating.

• (46:57–51:02)

  • Discussing how and when to say “I love you” in sexual/romantic contexts.
  • Cara shares a story about telling someone “I love you” and not having it reciprocated for a month:

    “I got myself to the point... I can only tell her when I will feel comfortable if I say it and they don’t say it back, that I won’t care...” —Cara (48:47)

---

7. The Comedic Finale: “Throuple Tryout” & Final Jokes

• (52:03–57:44)
  • New recurring bit: interviewing friends as potential “thirds” in their relationship.
  • Cara “pitches” why she’d make a good throuple partner, citing humor, independence, dog compatibility, and “hype energy.”
  • Jokes about how the dynamics would (not) work:

    “It would be... we would be in prison. ... We would be out of control, but, like, we would be having a blast.” —Cara (55:14)

  • Laughter about water parks, ankle braces, and being each other’s caregivers.
  • Deep appreciation and affection among all three, especially about how much Cara makes the hosts laugh:

    “No one makes me laugh like Cara does.” —Kendahl (56:56) “Honestly, no one makes me laugh like Cara...” —Jordan (57:00)

---

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Cara on healing:

  "Healing is not linear, and that is something that I've really been embracing." (01:39)

• On dating after heartbreak:

  “I don't actually think that anyone is ever gonna match. Like, it just feels extremely fake.” (04:16)

• On breakup pain:

  “If you don't feel like you're dying, then, yeah, maybe you didn't... maybe it wasn't really there.” (19:53)

• On relationship archetypes:

  “You're a Kendall, and you need a Jordan.” (10:25)

• Kendahl on first date disasters:

  “We hooked up...in my car, my Prius, my mom's car in the parking lot...I immediately start sobbing. I mean, sobbing. I was like, could not breathe. They're holding me. I've just met this person. I was like, I missed my ex so much.” (29:28)

• Cara on post-breakup friendship:

  “Letting people know that you're thinking of them is always nice. ... Just willing to listen.” (33:06)

• On throuple logistics and humor:

  "We would be out of control, but, like, we would be having a blast...it would be...we would be in prison." (55:00)

• Warmth among friends:

  “No one makes me laugh like Cara does.” —Kendahl (56:56)

---

Timestamps of Key Segments

• Relationship history & “second divorce”: 01:04–03:50
• Online dating/Raya/famous crushes: 03:50–07:02
• Relationship archetypes (“Kendahl/Jordan”): 07:32–13:18
• Divorce advice & logistics: 14:04–19:13
• Emotional fallout post-breakup: 19:44–22:40
• Advice: moving on/casual dating: 24:10–28:08
• Supporting friends through breakup: 31:43–33:06
• Breakup sex: 33:48–35:15
• Lingering love & moving forward: 39:54–44:33
• “Are you a player?”: 44:39–46:46
• “I love you” milestones: 46:57–51:02
• Throuple tryout/comedic wrapup: 52:03–57:44

---

Conclusion & Takeaways

Episode 101 is a raw, funny, and comforting exploration of love lost, self-discovery, dating after heartbreak, and the importance of supportive friends. Cara Connors brings vulnerably sharp wit and honesty—as do the hosts—reminding listeners that while heartache is hard (and sometimes hilarious in hindsight), healing, community, and even reimagined futures are always possible.

---

Find Cara Connors:

• Social: @thatcaraconnors
• Standup special: On Amazon

For advice, matchmaking, or more laughs:

• Subscribe to Happy Wife, Happy Life on your preferred platform
• Join their Patreon for extra content and community

Transcript

[A]

Ever notice how ads always pop up at the worst moments when the killer's

[B]

identity is about to be revealed during

[A]

that perfect meditation flow. On Amazon Music, we believe in keeping you in the moment. That's why we've got millions of ad free podcast episodes, so you can stay completely immersed in every story, every reveal, every breath. Download the Amazon music app and start listening to your favorite podcasts, ad free included with Prime. Welcome to Happy Wife, Happy Life.

[C]

We're your hosts.

[A]

I'm Kendall Landruth. And I'm Jordan Myra. And we are two incredibly unqualified but

[C]

deeply in love comedians who are here to help you with all things relationships. And on today's episode, we're talking about getting divorced a second time with Cara Connors.

[B]

Hey,

[A]

Hey, Cara. Cara, take my hand.

[B]

You did me dirty with that intro

[A]

and you know it.

[B]

It's for.

[C]

You're our first ever repeat guest. And our first time we had you on. We talked about how you got straight divorced.

[B]

Right.

[C]

From your husband back in the day. Yes. And then you were in a long term gay partnership.

[B]

Correct.

[C]

Up until sort of recently.

[B]

Six months ago.

[C]

And you were engaged.

[B]

It's true.

[C]

And then that ended.

[B]

Yes.

[C]

So it's not a full on second divorce.

[A]

To be clear.

[B]

To be clear. Yeah.

[A]

But it is happening in a way.

[B]

But it's time to let go and it feels. Wow.

[C]

How you doing?

[A]

How you feeling? Care.

[B]

You know, I am healing is not linear. And that is something that I've really been embracing.

[C]

That's beautiful.

[A]

You're blonde now.

[C]

I'm sure the fans are noticing your blonde now.

[A]

It looks really good.

[B]

Thank you.

[A]

I really like it.

[B]

Thank you.

[A]

It looks good with your dark eyebrows.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

I appreciate that.

[C]

You're also posting videos online of you doing pull up.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

No, anything I've been doing is that I can do a pull up. Pull up. Actually today, something huge I haven't even posted about yet, but today I actually did two.

[C]

Wow.

[A]

Wait, how long have you been trying to do one?

[B]

My whole life.

[A]

Because I've. It's, you know, it's my lifelong goal.

[B]

Yeah. I've never been able to ever.

[A]

How did you get there?

[B]

I think that. I honestly think that this breakup kind of just like propelled me and like tapped into some new strength as I've had to tap into a lot of inner resources.

[A]

Sure.

[B]

Wow.

[C]

So Kendall and I should break up. She'll be able to do a pull up.

[A]

You remember when you first are going through the breakup and then I has you over to our home and I tried to make pasta homemade. And then it all turned into one big ball of pasta. And then we all had to pretend to eat it and enjoy it.

[B]

It was great. It was great. Stop me. I. Oh, I like your shoes. I'm trying to sell a pair of those on offer up in case any. You don't like them that much. Any of fans got a size 10?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. You're 10. Yeah, 10 too.

[B]

Whoa. Oh.

[A]

Oh.

[B]

Could actually be. That could actually open up a lot for us.

[C]

Yeah, we need to be talking.

[B]

Wait, this is actually huge. Trying to keep a fist away. Yeah. But I. But yeah, I' I'm excited to be here.

[C]

What was harder, your straight divorce or your gay divorce?

[B]

There's no question. The gay divorce is the hardest thing I've ever dealt with as an adoring. There's absolutely no question.

[A]

Even though there was a lot of. I mean, less logistics problems. I mean, but I mean, you were fully married.

[B]

You had to go through like a divorce. I was fully married. Had to go through a divorce. Honestly, like, I feel like. Yeah, it doesn't even touch it with a ten foot pole.

[C]

Well.

[A]

Cause there's probably also excitement with that where you're like, I'm about to be knee deep in puss.

[B]

Right. Cause I was like, I'm about to. About to pop off. I'm like, I loved like our journey together with my ex husband. But then I'm like, now it's time. But yeah, this one was a little bit. This was a little bit different. But what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Right?

[C]

Kelly Clarkson said that. That's what I thought and I agree with her. But you're on the market now.

[B]

I am on the market.

[C]

Do you feel like you've healed enough to get back out there?

[B]

I feel like I. Yeah, we're just hitting the six month mark. I thought that I did like, I made an attempt to maybe like dip my toes into it and then it got a. So I've kind of retreated. And then my friend was like, you should go on Raya for one month. And she like paid for me to go on Raya. So I've been there for a few days and I gotta say, I don't actually think that anyone is ever gonna match. Like, it just feels like extremely fake.

[C]

Raya's so interesting to me because it seems like everyone who's ever been on the Bachelor and then like my cousin who was on Raya and my cousin's like, not famous. And I was like, well, how did you get on Raya and she was like, I just had a friend that like sent me a code and then I was on it. My cousin's extremely attractive, but yeah, she's like, not famous. And I'm like, I thought Raya was for famous people.

[B]

I mean, I'm not famous. And I got on it from just like a friend who referred me well.

[C]

But you're a successful stand up comedian.

[B]

Yeah, but I'm not, you know, it's not like I did click on and I saw. There was like one famous person I saw right away and I was like, whoa, okay, is this like a real thing? And then everybody else is just like a 22 year old. That's like in Milan. Nobody knows their relationship style. Nobody's out. I'm like, I'm actually obsessed with that.

[C]

Yeah. Wait, the famous person, how famous were they really famous? One to ten.

[B]

Ten.

[A]

What?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And you think, was it real?

[B]

Yeah, I think so.

[A]

A lister.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Actor.

[B]

Actor.

[C]

Gay.

[B]

Gay. Yeah. No, I'm not trying to go with a straight person. No. Isn't she married?

[C]

Yes, she's.

[B]

I would love.

[A]

Yeah, I saw her at an amc. Oh, she walked, I'm telling you, six inches from me. I'm coming up to everybody. Jordan. Jordan. I saw Kristen ster. I saw Kristen Stewart. No one believes me because famously I. No, I. One time I was convinced John Keones was on our flight.

[C]

Kennel kept being like, go to the bathroom. I swear to God. John Keones is sitting in, you know, seat X42.

[A]

It was just an elderly man, but then it was just apparently Macaulay Culkin in Brussels. I was convinced. Oh, there he is. Chased him down. You know what's so crazy?

[C]

We have seen famous people in real life and she never clocks it.

[B]

Right.

[C]

When we were in Europe recently, we saw Phineas, Billy's brother.

[A]

Well, I didn't know who that was. Part of why I didn't know. She has no clue. No idea who that was.

[B]

She, she.

[C]

One time we were on a flight from Amsterdam to Copenhagen and she was like, the husband from Sister Wives is sitting.

[A]

I was like, cody's here. Cody's here.

[C]

She's like, yes, it is. You didn't even watch that show.

[A]

So everyone's making fun of me. They're like, kendall's going to be like, kristen Stewart's here. And then she's going to be like, you know, you'll see her. She's in an AMC uniform. I'm working at. Nobody actually was. And then other people came up and they were like, kristen Stewart's Here.

[B]

Huge. She's married. I mean, forget it.

[A]

But maybe sometimes people surprise you. They'll be on these dating sites. They're open.

[C]

Or some people are open.

[B]

There are people that are open. That's. That's definitely a thing.

[C]

Did you like the famous person?

[B]

I hearted them.

[C]

And did they hurt you back?

[B]

Not yet.

[A]

Not yet.

[C]

Still time.

[A]

What's your.

[C]

What are you looking for?

[A]

Like, what's your type physically?

[B]

I mean, I'm. I'm open. I do feel like I wouldn't mind being with, like, a tall ass, like, WNBA player. Like, I wouldn't mind.

[C]

Oh, you wouldn't mind?

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Oh, that's so generous.

[B]

Oh, shut up.

[C]

You wouldn't mind?

[B]

Well, some people don't want that, But I'm, like, 5, 10. I'm like, I actually could get down in that direction, but, like, I could

[A]

also, like, would you be a third? Like, would you date Jordan and I.

[B]

I don't want to do that because I. I don't think so.

[A]

With us specifically.

[B]

Is that why you guys asked me?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I invited you back.

[B]

I don't want to be a third. I would have sex with a couple, but I don't want to be, like. I don't think that that is what my heart needs right now is to.

[A]

Oh, I. A polyamorous gay triad with people in la.

[B]

Sounds like an absolute nightmare. No, something tells me. No, I think, like, I would like somebody that lives in Los Angeles. I would like somebody who has a great sense of humor. I don't even need somebody to be funny. That would be amazing.

[A]

But I laugh.

[B]

I need somebody who, like, can laugh at you. There's people who are not funny and are not good at laughing, and those people love to date me. Yeah, that seems to be. That seems to be, like, a thing.

[A]

So.

[B]

Yeah, I need somebody that's really funny. I need somebody that's really patient. Yeah, they better be tapped into that Meditation practice. Yeah.

[C]

You know, that seems like something they would practice.

[B]

Discipline, focus. More just, like, patient in the sense, you know, like, go with the flow. I want somebody that's understanding. I don't want, like, a drill sergeant. Uh.

[C]

Oh.

[B]

Ooh.

[A]

Candy. Jordan. Jordan runs a tight ship. Damn.

[C]

But it makes me better because I need to.

[B]

I'm not saying I don't need a firm hand. Yeah, you need. But I do need somebody.

[A]

I do need some issues. I know. Well, that's like, with Jordan, I'm like, I feel bad, like, when I think about, like, you know, sometimes you think like, oh, if I wasn't with my partner, where would I be? Like, what would I have done? Like, what would my life be like right now if I'd never asked her? Not on a date? And I'm like, I would be. I mean, it's really sad to think about because I would be. Nowhere is where I.

[C]

Thousand dollars in debt.

[A]

Oh, my God. And I would have done nothing. And. And it's like, I've. Everything I've done is because I did. Did it. Like, I did the work.

[B]

Right.

[A]

But Jordan is at the back going, you have to work, Kendall.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

You have to get out of bed to do a thing. And then I do the work.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

But sometimes I wonder. Yeah, I wonder where I'd be.

[C]

Kendall's like.

[A]

Like, I'm like, a genius.

[C]

You can't just run electricity. Just, like.

[B]

Right.

[A]

You know what I mean?

[C]

It has to be contained in, like.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

A bottle or.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

A light bulb.

[B]

We are similar in that sense. I need the str. I need, like, I could use help with the. The structuring around it. I'm. I'm out of bed. I'm out of bed. And I. I got all kinds of ideas, but maybe somebody. You're just running around kind of like.

[A]

Yeah, focus them.

[B]

Exactly. Help focus that. But also, like, that's. You know, I want to also be able to do that.

[C]

Well, the reason.

[A]

I mean, the reason I got my manager is when we first started dating, I was 20 years old and 21 years old. Sorry.

[B]

And Jordan, she was 21.

[A]

Jordan went through my.

[C]

I was 26. Everyone relax.

[A]

Jordan, Gotta read your emails. Jordan's going through my emails like, there's a person here asking you to be your manager.

[C]

She's followed up three times.

[A]

And I was like, oh, my God. And that is my manager still to this day. Wow, she's the greatest. And I. I wouldn't even. I was thinking. I'm like, I literally wouldn't even have had a manager if it wasn't for you being like, kendall, look at your email.

[B]

Yeah. See, I feel like I do need. I do need that for sure. But I think that person can be patient. You have to be patient as hell to do that.

[C]

I do think I am very patient.

[B]

So, yeah, I think I do, actually, because everything you're describing is me. So I do actually think I need.

[C]

You're a Kendall, and you need a Jordan. Yes, I understand.

[A]

But, yes, Kendall's bring a lot of awesomeness.

[B]

And that's the thing.

[A]

And you bring someone who sees. Yes, that because you. Because I think you stop Pointing. Because. Yes, yes. Literally, they need us. We bring the vibe and we're fine. It's like. Like I've taught you how to stop and smell the rose.

[B]

Yes, yes, sure.

[A]

And like, we. When you look back at life, right? What you're going to the. When you have the montage in your head of your life, it's going to be moments. I created 100.

[C]

Okay, that's hurtful. And then.

[A]

But the money. The money.

[C]

No moments.

[A]

The money we have to do those fun things is. Cuz you made me work.

[C]

No.

[B]

100. Yeah. Okay. Yes, yes.

[C]

We sound like one of the old husbands of one of the housewives. Like one of the young housewives.

[A]

Hey, nothing wrong with that.

[C]

Erika Jane's husband that, like, did a Ponzi scheme and Kendall's. Erica Jane. That's how she sees it in her mind.

[A]

Nothing wrong with that.

[B]

No, that's what I need. You guys are exactly right. No, I want you guys to set me up. I already told you that.

[C]

I would love to.

[A]

I think we're really good at setting people up because we can see like. I see. We can see like the pros and cons.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

We can see what someone needs, that what you would bring positively to their life. But it's a fine line. I know some people with me could not. They could not date me. I. Some people could not date me.

[B]

Same.

[A]

And I agree with you on that.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

No, I do think, like, because imagine, okay, you guys know me really well. Imagine that you'd never met me and you just like, looked at like, whatever, a little a hinge profile or something of me. That's not.

[A]

You'd have no way of knowing.

[B]

There's no way.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

It would not translate. I think they, like. I need people like. That's my new thing is I want to be. That's what I'm manifesting for. I want my close friends to set me up. And who could actually, like, you know.

[A]

Are you willing to go on like a couple dates?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

I do think it is funny to think about that. I've never really thought about that. But I do think seeing you on a hinge profile, I think you would see, seem. And I'm not saying you're not. I think you would seem extremely cool.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

And like, aloof. And you're not aloof at all.

[B]

No, I'm not.

[A]

And you're cool, but in a way that we appreciate. You're not cool in a cool way. You know, you're not cool. And like, I'm cool. Well, you're not cool like a greaser. You're a goof ass like a greaser. You're okay, Danny Zuko. You're not cool like that. You're not mysterious.

[B]

No, you're cool like you're cool.

[A]

Yeah, you're cool because I like you. Good personality.

[B]

There you go. Thank you.

[C]

You're sweet.

[B]

I think I'd come across aloof that. Yeah.

[C]

I come off as like. Because I think you probably have a bunch of like cool pictures where like when I was taken on film and it's like ye. You like hanging off like a sign or something like in New York. And then another one is you like smoking a joint.

[A]

And then another one is this right. With.

[C]

With two dogs and no top on that.

[B]

I'm going to let you make my profile.

[C]

I know. Well. And I'd be like, well, she's like really cool. But I might be like, oh, maybe she's like too like cool guy for me, you know.

[B]

Right.

[C]

And you're not.

[B]

No. Yeah. Or like the comedian thing, you know, that can be tough. But like I do put that on the profile because I'm like, I don't need somebody that is like obviously not going to be okay with that. But like that means a lot of things, you know.

[A]

Would you rather date someone who's like fully normal job?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

You should date like a middle school teacher.

[B]

I wanna, that's funny. I want to.

[C]

Children.

[A]

Yeah, they never get time off. They go back, back home.

[B]

They'd be on the clock 24 7, baby. No, I, I think they could be in the industry, but not maybe like a performer.

[C]

Sure.

[B]

You know, like I could do. Yeah, that's what I was thinking.

[C]

The woman that holds the boom. That's famous woman. I always meet her.

[B]

No, I'm, I'm, you know, I'm. I'm open.

[C]

Wow, I love that. I do need to know, with both of your relationships ending, did you see it coming or no?

[A]

Well, the first one you must have seen coming.

[B]

Well, I saw coming once I realized that I was gay. Sure I did. I did think to myself, you we've had a really bad last. Yeah. With my ex husband. I was like the last year has been bad since you started comedy. Now you realize that you're gay. Babe, the writing's on the wall.

[C]

Sure.

[B]

It's only a matter of time. So that one I was right about this one I didn't see it coming. No, I definitely thought that this was a, you know, a forever situation, but it just got really quiet. But I will never Regret, I'll never regret, like loving someone and I'm very like, go big or go home. Leave it all out on the field. And one thing I. There's no regrets. No like. And one thing I know for sure is I'm like, I 1000% was all in and like 100% love. And the pain that I've been experiencing, I'm like, that to me indicates the depth of love that I am, you know, able to like, actually give. Yeah, it's on the opposite side of it.

[C]

That's really nice. I think that's a good segue because we have a lot of people that

[B]

have questions for us and I've got answers.

[C]

Thank God. We have a lot of people that are going through breakups or divorces.

[A]

I mean, literally a lot.

[B]

I know.

[A]

They're always too, like, they're asking, they're always emailing us, being like, should I divorce my husband? I'll do it this week.

[C]

Oh, tell me now if I should divorce my husband.

[B]

One thing is I will be very like definitive. Like, I don't want to give like a wishy washy.

[C]

No, I love that.

[B]

I like these glasses, by the way.

[A]

Thank you. They're expensive.

[B]

Well.

[C]

Well, they were free for me.

[A]

I know.

[B]

Well, you better keep my fancy one. Did you get a little, did you get a little thing where they like get you the glasses because you're like a creator or whatever.

[C]

They asked, they said, do you want to come in, make a video about the glasses for a pair of glasses? And I was like, yeah, but it's like a queer owned glasses store.

[B]

Oh my God. I need to start like dming people like that. I always think it's a scam because I think it is. Anyt anybody's ever reached out to me, I'm like, this guy's a freaking trying to. They're trying to put me in a van.

[C]

Well, it depends on what it is.

[B]

Honey, I need, I need a Jordan to tell me if they're going to put me in a van or if

[C]

it's just a great opportunity.

[A]

Just don't give them your address. I'm not going to give them my address. Then you'll be fine.

[B]

I'm not giving them anything. Honey, I'm not responding.

[C]

Okay. Do you have any advice on whether or not you should go forward with a divorce? We've been together for 13 years. That's the only information. No information. There's no way to know what are first steps.

[B]

Did the divorce already start?

[A]

I don't know.

[C]

What are first Steps.

[B]

Read it. Read it. Say one more time, do you have

[C]

any advice for going forward with a divorce? We've been together for 13 years.

[A]

Oh, okay. Okay. Like, they're not deciding whether or not to divorce. They're divorced.

[C]

They're like, how do I go about it? What are. What are the first steps?

[B]

Are these all gay people?

[C]

Not necessarily.

[A]

A lot of them are not honest.

[B]

Oh.

[C]

But a lot of them are.

[B]

Okay, okay. That doesn't help me at all. So what are the first steps of getting divorced? Yeah, I would say talking to the person that you're thinking about getting divorced from. I mean, at that point, if you're already thinking about, you may as well just say it. Right.

[C]

But what's the. Okay, this maybe logistic question. Yeah. Like, what's the logistical first thing? And what is something about it that surprised you where you were like, oh, I didn't realize this was part of getting divorced.

[B]

Oh, I mean, I think it depends where you are. I was in Canada and, like, we were. I was, like, researching it, I guess, like, googling stuff and figuring out each person. We did, like, a mediation. So each person is, like, legally required to have a lawyer. That's a thing? Yeah. I guess I shouldn't have been surprised, but it can move pretty quick. If you are determined and your ex

[A]

is a lawyer, you can really get it done.

[B]

But I know that's good to know

[A]

because I think in my head I'd be like, oh, it takes years.

[B]

I think it takes years because people have a lot of stuff like custody and property to split up. And then people like those, I think, are the two big things that are going to take time. Or you're like, the longer that you argue and try and negotiate, any money that you guys have is just going to deplete. Yeah.

[C]

Because of lawyers.

[B]

Yeah. So every time that you're like, no, I'm not doing that, or, no, I'm not doing that. Okay, email your lawyer and have them follow up. That's 300 bucks, 400 bucks, you know, depending. So you're just kind of draining the whole thing. So I feel like I'm a big proponent of just, like, you know what, for all of it. Gay or travel. Yeah, let it go. Who cares? There's more money to be made. There's more, like, love to me, like, same with kids.

[A]

Yeah, make a new one.

[B]

Make a new one. But like, anything that, you know, like, you can't, like, with money, who gives a.

[A]

Well, especially because you're spending your time. It's like you'll hear these people be like, I. I mean, I've heard so many people be like, I'm in a bad financial situation. Like, I want to say adults, but you know what I mean? Like, 56 year olds.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

They're like, I'm in a bad financial position because of a divorce I went through 20 years ago.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like, whoa, what the hell were you fighting over then? What did all of that? And also, it's just like, you're having to spend that entire time conversing with them all the.

[B]

It's just like, let it go. You can make more money, you can do other stuff, and maybe next time around, get a prenup.

[C]

Do you have to have a lawyer to get divorced?

[B]

I don't know that answer everywhere, but

[A]

could you just write down, we're divorced?

[B]

I don't know. No, you definitely are going to have to do some. Some paperwork.

[C]

All right.

[B]

And it's going to get tricky.

[C]

Okay, fine. Kendall and I'll stay married.

[B]

So I don't know if that helped, but.

[A]

No, that's good.

[B]

Honest.

[A]

No, that's good.

[C]

I think it's good.

[A]

That's good.

[C]

I think it's good.

[B]

I wish there was more context. I wish. I'll say. I wish there was any context, but I wish that person.

[A]

Well, yeah, I do. And congratulations.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Okay, this person wants to know, is it normal to feel like I'm dying? And I think, yeah, right.

[B]

Oh, that's when you're. In reference to a breakup.

[C]

Yeah. Or a divorce.

[B]

100%. I think that that is very normal. I feel like if you don't feel like you're dying, then, yeah, maybe you didn't. You know, maybe it wasn't really there. Well, maybe it wasn't. I don't know. Unless you're, like, totally numb. But I think it is very normal to feel like you're dying. I mean, I certainly have been feeling like that.

[A]

You still feel that way?

[B]

I don't feel like I'm actively dying in this moment, but I do feel like I have, like. Yeah, I feel like I have felt like that for the last, you know, five months.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Well, I feel like it's hard, too, when you're like, there's not a good reason. Like, I don't speak for you, but, like, in any situation where you're like, it actually would still be better if we just hadn't done this versus, like, a relationship where you're like, this is for the best. Like that. Which ultimately, it is for the best, but still, it's easier when like, someone does something really bad.

[B]

Totally.

[A]

You know what I mean?

[B]

Yes. Yeah. Like, when somebody does something horrible or, like, there's infidelity or there's this or that, it's easier to just be like, that person's a piece of shit. I'm. I dodged a bullet. So it is more complicated when you don't necessarily feel like that. But I do think that any breakover is always good. And for what I'm going through right now, because it's like. Like, if we're not happy, it's not working, then there's no point. Life is short. Like, I want you to be as happy as you possibly can be. I want myself to be. So. Yeah, you know?

[A]

I agree.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Kendall always tries to act, like, oh, well, if we broke up, I mean, I would be sad, of course, but. Oh, my gosh, she literally said that in the last episode.

[A]

Yeah, I would be sad. My point is, is that I would be sad solely because I would be sad. Like, it would only be sad. I wouldn't be. Like I was saying in the last episode, it's actually incredible advice. I was saying that you should always be checking in with yourself and being like, right, if my partner dumped me tomorrow, yeah, would I be fine? Like, fine. Like, not mentally fine, but, like, would I be, like, would I have friends? Would I have hobbies? Would I know what to do with myself? Would I be able to, like, function? Would I have abilities to soothe myself that don't, for sure, like, require them to be involved? And so I. For me, I was like, yeah, I'd be fine. But then all I would be is sat down. I feel like that's so much nicer than if I was. Like, I would be sad. And also, like, I wouldn't have any money because Jordan gives me all the money, and that's the only reason I'm with them.

[C]

I just think it's good to know that Kendall would be devastated if we broke up.

[A]

I would be devastated, but I'd be fine.

[B]

Yeah, I see what you're saying. The distinction of being fine. Like, I felt like that I. I feel fine. Like, I have felt like I have all my friends. Like, my life has remained. I'm not reliant on another person to do anything, to live life and to feel happy on my own.

[A]

And something stayed the same.

[B]

Yeah, some things. Yeah, a lot of things. Like, my friends and, like, what I'm doing day to day stayed the same. But. Yeah, but in terms of the actual, you know, pain of just losing somebody, I don't know how you wouldn't feel like you were dying if you, like, fully loved somebody, right?

[A]

Kendall, I would feel. What is wrong?

[B]

No, no, you feel like I was.

[A]

But that's your problem. You would want. If we broke up, you would want. Oh, my God.

[B]

That's your problem. You would always call the police a cat. But you always.

[A]

You want my life. If we bro up, you'd be. You'd want my life to. The way you're acting now, you'd want my life to crumble, which is not the truth. No, Jordan would baby me. Jordan would be calling me. Jordan would be checking my email in bed with another woman saying, kendall, respond to this woman.

[C]

I did tell Kendall's dad on her on his deathbed. I said, no matter what happens, I will take care of Kendall.

[B]

Wow, that's a big.

[A]

That's a big.

[B]

And I mean it.

[A]

Yeah, well, he's not here to check, so. Oh, well, that's an easy thing to say to someone who's about to.

[C]

Or die down there.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Wherever he is.

[B]

No, that's.

[C]

I love him, so I mean it. I'll take care of you.

[A]

Oh, you're very sweet. No, I agree. I would take care of you forever. But I think it's good to know that some people, it's like if they broke up with their partner, they would literally have to move cities. Like, everything would be different.

[B]

Yeah. Many people are like more scorched earth. And I've learned that through this breakup from hearing different things from different friends. Because there are plenty of my friends who are like, you're being too nice, queen. Like you should, you know. Yeah.

[C]

That was ultimately us. Yeah. This person says, my current situationship has just come out of a long term relationship and I don't want to pressure her or move too fast. How can I maintain my own sense of what we are versus also respecting her need for space and time to heal.

[B]

Date other people casually at the same time. I think so. Because I think that, like, if you're kind of waiting for somebody to heal, then you're gonna kind of go crazy. You can't rush that process for somebody else. You're gonna get too much in your feels. So I would say anything you can do to allow yourself to slow it down or back it up. And sometimes that might mean putting your brain into or focusing it on something else. You can back it up on another person. And it's pretty interesting how that will definitely it remove full energy from the situationship. They feel that. And then it is going to be A question of cuz. Yeah, you don't want to be waiting around of like, am I going to be chosen or something like that.

[A]

Do you ever regret when you were younger? Cuz obviously now, like, we're married. I'm very happy. Oh my God. I have to say, I just have to say this all the time. I'm very happy.

[B]

Like, you got to go under your.

[A]

I mean, right? But do you ever regret when you were like 20? Like, I have these memories being like 19 and 20 and dating a person who I really liked. And we like, we're having, you know, good sex or whatever, and then they'd be like, I just, I'm not ready to commit. Like, I still want to be seeing other people. And at 19, I was like, no, please. Like, I want to be monogamous. And I'm like, why was I not like, yeah, this is the dream scenario.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

I'm not gonna fucking marry this person anyways. 19. This person wants to like, date me and then also lets me, like, go have sex with other people.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But I was so like, hell bent on like, settling down that I just wish I could go back sometimes, you know?

[C]

Well, I think the grass is always greener. Do you know what I mean? Like, when you're in a relationship, you can romanticize being single.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You're single.

[C]

You romanticize being in a relationship. It's like you always want what you don't have, what you don't have, or even if you don't want it. Like, I don't want to be single. But sometimes I will think back on when I was single and I was like, yeah, why wasn't I just like out on the town every night? And it's like, right. Because that feels lonely.

[B]

It does feel isolating. Yeah.

[C]

You know what I mean? Like, it feels, feels fun now. But the reality of the situation right now is I'm in a very secure relationship.

[B]

Correct.

[C]

So it's like in the fantasy of it, there's like, nothing to lose.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Right.

[C]

Versus, like, in reality. There is.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

I think it is like in theory, because, yeah, you go on days where you're like, oh, I can date whoever I want. I can ask out whoever I want. I could go up to this person. Like, I realized I was out at a bar, like the other night with a friend and I. It was a gay bar and I kind of looked up and then I was like, wait, I'm single. I can actually talk to anybody in here. But my brain has been, you know, trained on not doing that. Well, the thing is, is, like, you can go on a first date with somebody, and instead of it feeling, like, exciting and sexy, it can be. You can feel more alone. Because then you're like, oh, wow. I literally have nothing in common with you babes. Like, you seem amazing. You're a great person. But, like, we're not for each other. And then it can kind of be hard because then you're like, yeah, or it seems good.

[C]

And then after, they're like, you're actually not for me.

[B]

And I hope.

[A]

Because in my head, and obviously this from. In my head, it's like, if I was ever single again, you build it up in your head. You're like, when I'm single, like, I'm gonna be attacked at a gay bar.

[C]

Ladies will be lined up down the block.

[A]

Right. Like, I will have. Because you have this in your head that you're like, I've grown while I've been in the relationship. Like, I would literally be breaking hearts. And the reality just sometimes isn't that, which is. Is tough.

[B]

So. So what should I do right now? If you were living vicariously through me, what should I do?

[A]

I would be hitting.

[C]

I think you should be out.

[A]

Dance party.

[B]

You think I should be out on the town?

[A]

I think you might as well like you. I mean. But it also may end in, like, tears some nights. But I think that is part of the feeling. That's part of the experience. I do remember, which I was younger, so it's probably would be less satisfying now, but being, like, 19, and you're, like, sobbing on the side of the

[C]

road, like, you can't.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

And even though it's horrible, you're like, I feel so cinematically, I'm living right. The fullest right now.

[B]

Yes, I do feel that.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I also think that. And I was saying this in the last episode, but you have to just, like, rip the band aid off.

[B]

And I think trying to date new people.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Trying to date new people. And also, you have to remind yourself that there are other people out in the world better or for worse.

[B]

Right.

[C]

And sometimes it's gonna be fun. Sometimes it's gonna be bad.

[A]

It's gonna be bad sometimes.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

But even if it is bad, I still. Yeah, it reminds you because I have so many friends that are like. I just feel like I've met everyone that I could. Oh, I don't feel like that kind of vibe.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And I think. But I think it's so.

[A]

To feel like that.

[C]

And so I think when you just get out There you're like, oh, there's like a whole slew of people I've never met.

[B]

For sure.

[C]

For better or for worse.

[A]

But I think you have to. I mean, maybe. I think you're a little more emotionally stable than the two of us. Maybe. I don't want to speak for Cara, but I feel like we're similar, you and I.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

And I remember going on a first date after I broke up with. No, I didn't break up with her. I got dumped years ago, and I went on a date.

[B]

Thank you.

[C]

Sure. Yeah, I agree. My game.

[A]

And I went. I go on this date. Well, first of all, it's actually a hole. It was like. I didn't know. We were. We were.

[C]

What is this?

[A]

We were sexting. She didn't know if it was date. We were sexting. And then all of a sudden, they were like three hours away. I was like, this is great. All of a sudden they said, I'm coming to meet you.

[B]

I know.

[A]

And I was teaching improv class. I said, oh, boy, here we go. I was living out with my parents at the time. I had to meet me in my middle school parking lot. We hooked up.

[C]

Things were plenty.

[A]

We hooked up.

[B]

That is, we have sex stuff.

[A]

And then I. In my car, my Prius, my mom's car in the parking lot.

[C]

Oh, my God. I'm gonna listen to this.

[A]

Yeah. Well, I mean, it was like gay sex, so, I mean, it was not like that disgusting. And then we. I immediately start sobbing. I mean, sobbing. I was like, could not breathe. They're holding. They're holding me. I've just met this person. I was like, I missed my ex so much. No, I was like, 18. So, yeah, it was insane. But I'm lobbing.

[B]

And they were like.

[A]

They were like, comforting me. And I mean, God bless them, they still follow me on Instagram.

[B]

Oh, that's sweet.

[A]

And they comment on my stuff. They'll be like, you look great here. You're good. Happy for you. But after I. That night, they kept trying to date me. I was like, of course. And I remember at one point being like, you need to have a little more self respect. Damn. Every time I'm with you, I cry over my ex.

[B]

Right.

[A]

But anyways, I'm just saying it can go badly, but I won't, like, put

[B]

myself in that situation. That's why I have been like, because

[A]

you're older, you're more.

[B]

Yeah. Or I'm just like.

[A]

It's like.

[B]

I mean, that can happen. But I'm saying, like, I That's why I've been like very cautious where I'm like. And, and my instinct is like let me have like close friends set me up. Like I'm not in a rush to go and.

[C]

Yeah, cuz you don't want to pull a candle.

[B]

Cuz I don't want to go to my middle school parking lot.

[C]

Listen, get walked out there and then get.

[A]

And then for years you're scared that you're going to get like put on some list. Cuz you had sex in your middle school parking lot.

[C]

Sex offenders registry. Yeah, some list.

[A]

It was dark. I don't. It was like midnight. I know.

[B]

It's. Look, I mean that's not your fault. That's like, that's, that's. This is a hope. We live in a homophobic world that you don't have a place that you could park your Prius.

[A]

Right. You don't have. I, you know the only choice was

[C]

a place surrounded by children.

[A]

No, it was night. It was talking about it lived at night and. And I lived in a rural area such you would have had to do the whole cross country track to get to a single student if it was even operational hours. And it wasn't.

[B]

Wasn't operational hours. Jordan, don't be ignorant.

[C]

Sorry. Sorry.

[A]

They're rehearsing the players you're desperate for me to get. It was summer.

[B]

God.

[A]

I was back from college.

[B]

It was summer. They were in college. It was right before you guys met.

[A]

It was only kids who were doing

[C]

summer school and they've already had fall and it was. We met. Okay, okay. So you're going through a divorce kind of right now. Famously we've touched on that. This person wants to know how to be there for one of their friends that's going through a divorce.

[B]

So what are things that you wish

[C]

people were doing saying cuz it's a delicate.

[A]

Some people feel differently. Some people are like don't do this or I please do that. You know?

[B]

Yeah. I definitely think it depends on the person. I think for myself it is like people, you know, answering the phone, like just, just being there and just kind of. Yeah. And just like being nice to me, giving me hugs, telling me I'm a nice person. Checking in. I feel like my. That's my main emotional needs. I'm like. I'm very sensitive so I just like need like that, you know, that emotional reassurance. I think that's the main thing that, that that has helped me with my friends. Yeah. Checking in and. Yeah, those are the big ones.

[C]

I have A question about that.

[B]

What's up?

[C]

Do you feel like it's good or bad for people to check in? Like, just being like, hey, what's up? Or do you like it to feel more like, hey, hey, single checking in?

[B]

I know you're going through a hard time.

[C]

Do you know?

[B]

Right, right.

[C]

What's the tone?

[A]

I know you're not doing good.

[C]

What's the tone of the checking in? Is one good? Is one bad? Are they both good? Are they both bad?

[B]

I think just, like, thinking of you, like, I don't feel, like, that much pressure. And I'm also, like, I. I reaching out to people all the time, too. I mean, you know, you guys know. And my friends are all taking shifts at the call center.

[C]

Clock and clock out. Yeah, you got to.

[B]

Who's going to catch that? Who's going to catch that call? You know, that crying phone call on a given night? But, yeah, I don't. I don't think. I just think, like, letting people know that you're thinking of them is always nice. I don't think it has to be, like, a perfect response and just, like, when you are with them, just like, like, yeah, I. I feel like you don't need to be solving anything or this, but just willing to listen.

[A]

That's a good point.

[B]

You know, I like it.

[C]

Do you think it's good that two of your close friends invited you on their podcast?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Is this the kind of thing you were kind of hoping for?

[B]

Yes, this is exactly what I was hoping for. And that's why I'm so glad you texted me. Hey, single.

[A]

He's single.

[C]

He's single. Thinking about you. Things are really bad for you right now.

[B]

Thinking about you.

[C]

Babes, Breakup sex. Yes or no?

[B]

No.

[C]

Is it good or is it bad?

[B]

You're saying with the ex.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Absolutely not.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

No, that. Access denied, the doors closed. I never do that.

[C]

No, I don't think I've ever done it.

[B]

Ever.

[A]

I've only done it when you're, like, getting back together. Like, if you're, like, gonna. Oh, there's a possibility.

[C]

Oh, yeah, I guess I've done that.

[A]

But I would never do that as an adult because I'd never be in that situation as an adult.

[B]

Right.

[C]

Yeah. Because you're married.

[B]

Right? Right.

[A]

Yeah. And you don't let me forget it.

[B]

That's where.

[C]

That's where it gets tricky.

[A]

That is where it gets tricky.

[C]

The comments are gonna be like, the animosity between these two makes me feel like something's up.

[B]

No, no. But, yeah, I don't think that that is a good idea if your goal is peace and stability. Yeah, but that's not everybody's goal famously.

[C]

No, and that's true.

[A]

No. And sometimes you can just be like, this is gonna be bad. It's a bad idea. And that doesn't that feel good?

[B]

Right.

[A]

When it's a bad idea. But then it is gonna end badly. So you just need to.

[B]

I just think there's no way that it's not gonna feel like so much.

[A]

But you know what is hard is like I remember. So I was reading this book recently where they're divorced and it's like they, they are fully divorced and they're co parenting a child though. And they're like, we're divorced. But they like keep like every time they have like family dinner once a week, they like hook up after. And I'm like, yeah, that would be hard to not be like, to be like, we are divorced but we broke up mutually. So no one's like mad at each other.

[B]

Right.

[A]

We just like had a kid when we were young and now we're older and like you're still really hot. And then we just keep hooking up. That's hard. That'd be bad.

[B]

Yeah. That does not resonate well.

[A]

No. That in my book, they didn't get back together. I don't think she was dating her gym coach.

[B]

Right. Because then like what you're, you're also closing yourself off from like taking care of yourself and then meeting somebody who actually does want to be with you. Not just somebody who like wants to you cuz you know how to get them off and they're like willing to be nice enough to you in that moment to. To pork you.

[A]

And that was the problem.

[B]

Exactly.

[C]

Yikes.

[B]

And that's going to be a yikes for me dog.

[C]

Yeah, absolutely.

[B]

Cut to my ex husband Dming me. I'm kidding. He's not on social media. Oh really?

[A]

That's always weird. But I have an ex who's not on social media and it is weird where I'm like, I just don't know where you are.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. But that's powerful. Then you're always like, h what are they up to? And it's like, nothing.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Cuz I, I would. When I, I think I've said this before, but I broke up with a girl who then immediately moved cities. States. She moved states. She moved back home after we broke up.

[B]

Oh yeah, that's happened to me too.

[A]

And doesn't have social media and I am like Is she.

[B]

Oh, is she okay?

[A]

Well, I mean, I don't really. Missing me, I guess. No, I'm like. Is she like even around. I don't know. What like.

[B]

I don't know. She's probably. Here's what happened. No, she married a man. Cuz that happened to me.

[A]

No, she didn't.

[C]

No, that's.

[A]

She did not. I. There's that, but you don't know that fact. I don't know for sure, but she was.

[C]

I think she married a man.

[A]

I think she married. She's the one who took me to the sex dungeon.

[B]

It doesn't matter. She was like a lesbian.

[A]

She was like one of the leather. She marched with the leather women.

[C]

What are they called? She marched with the leather women.

[B]

Like the kink community.

[C]

What do they call the.

[A]

The. There's like a group of lesbian.

[C]

Yeah, she's not going to marry a man. I don't. I don't know if that's spec.

[B]

Yeah, I. I don't know. I think like. Yeah, I. A woman who moved back, we like, it wasn't even dated. It was like full situationship vibes. And then we ended and then, and then she moved back to the Midwest and then married somebody who. Dead ringer for her brother. And I do love that for them. And. And that's. I think what happens.

[C]

Wow, Kendall.

[B]

So it's like that's.

[A]

What hair color did she have?

[B]

Blonde.

[A]

Oh, no, it wasn't mine.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

You thought it was the same.

[A]

Well, it could have been. I don't know.

[C]

You thought it was the exact same woman. Be awesome. You thought it was the same woman.

[A]

Well, my. That ex does have a really common name. And anytime. Because like I said, I don't have no idea where she is.

[B]

What's the letter? What's the first letter?

[A]

E. And she could have dyed her hair. Wait, wait, wait. E. Wait, are you fucking serious right now?

[C]

Wait, it's not.

[B]

No, no, no.

[A]

Oh, oh, okay. She could have gone by that. She could have gone by that. That. She could have gone by that. But whenever now someone will be like, oh, my ex. And they'll say that name. Such a common name. I'll be like, and where, where did you. Because I'm like, that's her. That's her. Cuz I'm like, where is she?

[B]

No, I think she is.

[A]

Last time I started, she was thinking about becoming a plumber. Is she.

[B]

What? It doesn't. No. Like, crazy things happen. But I think that I'm proposing that the lesbian community should get an invention similar to what they have in Iceland, which is like, they want to prevent, like, inbreeding in Iceland. And everyone's related. So when you go on a date with someone, you actually put their into a literal. This is a real thing. You put their name into like a registry and it confirms if they're not like a first cousin or something. The lesbian community needs to do that.

[C]

Yeah, but with.

[B]

We need to of just like you put it in. And if it's a one degree separation. Yeah. I mean, if you're cousins, it doesn't matter. You're not going to be able to biologically have kids.

[A]

So, yeah, date your cousin, but if they dated your ex.

[C]

Kendall's asking the hardest questions. What if it's my cousin?

[B]

I mean, she's really hot.

[A]

I mean, well, we always are the same if they're.

[C]

We're really hot.

[A]

I always have said, if we do 23 and me, we're gonna come back with some. I, I.

[B]

Why did you guys say that?

[C]

Oh, you guys.

[A]

I said that because we have so our families are from similar areas of the United States.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And they have a similar energy.

[B]

And we.

[A]

And we're soulmates, which means we must be related.

[B]

I don't think you guys are related.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

I don't either.

[B]

I don't think you're related. I don't think you have to worry about that.

[A]

Six cousins.

[C]

You don't even think Kendall wants us to be related.

[B]

I don't. I think you guys are related now because you're married.

[A]

Oh, yeah, that's true.

[B]

So maybe you can like, get that. Yeah, exactly. I think, like, you know, you guys should just, like, just like, be happy you found each other. You don't have to like, dig up

[C]

Kendall.

[A]

Wait, was your situationship. Did she want to be a plumber?

[B]

No.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

No, she was like music girl.

[A]

Oh. Mine wasn't.

[B]

And then light, like, we'll get into

[A]

mine kind of light a little bit.

[B]

Well, there's. There was a lot that was going on. But I'm happy for the siblings. I love siblings are dating vibes. So that I'm. I'm just happy for her.

[A]

Yeah, I love that.

[B]

I think it's cute. This person's gonna piss.

[C]

Kendall's only everyone that we're cousins. I'm curious.

[B]

Torrin's gonna choke me out.

[C]

This person says, I still care about someone I loved. Will that ever stop or will I continue to grow around it? You know, I think it will go away. Speaking from personal experience, because I would say, say I've loved people in other relationships.

[B]

Okay, good.

[C]

What's happening?

[B]

I don't know.

[C]

You guys are scaring the hell out Kendall. No, but I've loved other people. Kendall's not the only person I've ever been in love with. But I love Kendall the most. The most in love with Kendall. I'm never married. There was one other person that I was also very in love with and the first person I ever dated.

[A]

And I think it's also a different love. You. You honestly loved that person more than you loved me? Because your first. No, but be real. Your first love.

[B]

I don't agree with.

[A]

Your first love is like you.

[B]

No way.

[A]

You.

[C]

Absolutely not.

[A]

It's like a sick love. You know what I mean?

[C]

Do you love your first love more than me?

[A]

No.

[B]

No.

[A]

Now, now, let's not twist my words. Wait, okay, so. But you're my first long term relationship. You're my first long term relationship. I had, like a little girlfriend. That doesn't count.

[C]

You had a bunch of little girlfriends.

[A]

A bunch of little girlfriends. But we were never serious. You're my first serious. But, like, your first love is like. You're like, freak. You're freako about it.

[B]

You're like.

[C]

But you loved people before me.

[A]

Me? No, not really.

[C]

First person. Wait, this is too serious now.

[A]

I mean, I've said I love you people, but I did it, like, for attention. You're like the first person I've, like, loved.

[C]

Well, it feels like you do it for attention. On when you say to me, stop.

[B]

Well, that's.

[A]

But I put in the hours, too.

[B]

Supposed to get attention from. And vice versa.

[A]

Ding, ding, ding.

[C]

That's true.

[A]

Sorry, continue.

[C]

Wait, but.

[B]

Yeah, what were you gonna say? So you're saying that.

[C]

So I was very in love with this person, and we didn't work out for a multitude of reasons.

[B]

Okay, but, Bill, I.

[C]

It's simply too sad to get into a podcast.

[A]

Okay. But it.

[C]

I. For so long, I was just like, oh, I'll never be over this person. Never be over this person. I mean, for years and years and years and years. But, like, first of all, I will say I kept letting them come in and out of my life, which did not help things for me. I do truly believe that time heals all wounds, at least to a certain extent. But you keep reopening that wound every time you let that person. Person come back and do the same things that they did before and the reasons why you broke up. So I think that is. You got to be careful of that. You know, if you're gonna I'm not gonna tell you not to do it because I've done it. But if you're gonna do it, you know, just know that you're playing with fire a little bit. It is make things worse. But I do think now, you know, it just. It changes over time.

[B]

Yes. Yeah. I think it evolves. I think, like, I don't know. I don't know if you ever stop, like, having love for somebody. Like all the women I've been in love with or loved. I'm like, I still love that person. I want everything for that person. I want them to, like, succeed and feel great. And I. I hope that they are doing that, but I don't think it's going to feel the same way at all. I think, like, with time. But I do think that you kind of. I would hope so. I don't know.

[A]

But I also don't think it's so dramatic that it's like.

[B]

Or have love for them.

[A]

Maybe it's not so dramatic that it, like you build your life around. Like. I think they said something like, well, you just grow your life. It's like.

[B]

That's like grief terminology.

[A]

Yeah, it's kind of like. I don't know. I think when I think about, like, my first girlfriend, if someone would be like, oh, they're really sick right now, I'd be like, oh, man, that sucks. I feel so bad. And like, yeah, I care. I wish the best for that person. But I'm not like, if I. I'm never missing an ex so much that, like, I'm. Or, like, caring about them in a way that makes it to where I feel like I can't. I can't. It's just not a big deal. It's like, yeah, they're just a person. I had a. Yeah. Almost like a. Just a really good friendship with.

[B]

Right. Or like, old friends that you've, like, lost touch with. And then. Yeah, if you hear something like that, like, I still feel horrible even if we're not in touch and it's a friend from whatever elementary school and something happened there. I'm like, oh, my God. And then you. You know, because I think that's like being a human. But I don't think, like, yeah, it's gonna grow around it. I think you're gonna be able to, like. Like, just let it move through you like the waves. Like, let it. It. Yeah. Just ride it out. Surrender to those feelings.

[C]

And I will say, I do think there are also. There are people that I've been in relationships with that I'm just completely neutral towards now.

[B]

Oh, 100%.

[C]

I think that's also like.

[B]

I think that's a thing. Yeah. I think like most people. I feel like that most people like that. I've. Yeah. If, if we're putting in the category that I've loved those people, like most of them, I'm just like neutral. Wish them the best. There's a couple. There's a couple where I'm like, you really pissed me off. And then there's a couple where I'm like, I. Yeah, I don't have any feelings about it.

[C]

Sure.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah.

[B]

I've loved a lot of women.

[A]

I know. Are you like a player? A little bit? No, no, no.

[C]

Yes. You are like that.

[B]

I'm not a player, but I am like, sexually open.

[A]

Yeah. What do you mean? What do you mean?

[C]

Okay, I'm not a player, but I'm sexually open. What are you talking about?

[B]

I mean that. Okay, this is what I mean. Mean. I mean that, like, I can have fun and like get out there and like date people and like.

[A]

You can like have a one night stand.

[B]

Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 100. Like, I can like have different types of relationships with people. Like so. Yeah. But I'm not a player. I feel like I keep it all above board and then people, if they're not down with it, then like, like everything. You're free to go.

[C]

What?

[A]

You're free to go. What? Yeah, you're free to go. You're dismissed.

[C]

Think is considered being a player. Like, what would you consider a player?

[B]

Like lying and like being shady or like, like, I mean, I've had periods where I've been a player. I will, I'll own that because.

[C]

Because, you know, people will be in the comments correcting you because I know.

[B]

Because I don't need a couple of. Yeah. There's been periods where I have been like that, you know, But I think most of that occurred during my like post straight divorce, post, like first less breakup. Like the couple of years in between that and like this like serious relationship that I was just in. I was out of control. And I will admit that that. And that is kind of between me and my God. But I do think that there are exceptions when you've been like sexually repressed your whole life and then.

[C]

I agree.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

From 18 to 20. I. I can't be contacted about those.

[B]

I don't feel comfortable talking about.

[C]

I know.

[A]

I literally, I was so first of

[B]

all, like I said, out of pocket sometimes I found.

[A]

I found out lesbians could get STDs. I cried for four hours. I had no idea. No one told me. You're so repressed. No one explains anything to you. Don't worry, I've been tested.

[B]

Okay, good, good.

[A]

And I didn't spread any diseases. I was safe. Yeah, but no one tells me any. No one. You don't know anything. You haven't even, like, you know nothing. And then those two years, it's like a free for all. But you are an adult, so people are treating you as such. But you should not be given the same.

[C]

Yeah, it's out of control.

[B]

And also people's definition of player is different. So there's going to be people that are going to say that. Because some people, you go on one day with them or you hook up with them once and they want to be in a relationship with you and you don't, then they're like, yeah, you know what? You're a nasty player.

[A]

It's like, okay, I feel like a player. As if when you're hooking up, the person, like the person's acting like it's. They're like gazing into your eyes.

[C]

I think if you're hooking up and you say I love you and then don't mean it. That's.

[B]

Yeah, definitely no. Oh my God. You. No, definitely not.

[A]

I don't know. Saying I love you during sex is like embarrassing. Right? Like, I feel like even like that's like embarrassing. Like, even like we're married. It feels so. Like, what are we in the Titanic?

[B]

Saying it. I mean, saying. Saying a full phrase so you're like, I love you.

[C]

That's crazy.

[A]

That would feel. It's really.

[C]

Sometimes I feel like it slips out and you're like.

[A]

I feel like it's fine if you're losing your virginity on your wedding night.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

That is the only time that's.

[C]

That is so, like, you say it sometimes now.

[A]

We don't need to share.

[B]

Right, Right, Right.

[A]

So.

[C]

But it's.

[A]

It's like. But I say embarrassing things all the time.

[B]

It's a little like during sex. It's gonna be. Yeah, it can be a little tricky. Like almost anything taken out of context.

[C]

Text. Sure.

[B]

Right. Cuz it's just like I've definitely said

[A]

it during sex, but I think it is funny. It's like, it's so. It's like the most heightened. It's so dramatic.

[B]

It is dramatic. It's dramatic, but it's also like, you earned it, you know? But yeah. Not. I don't think you should say it to like, A random, for sure.

[A]

Have you ever said I love you to someone and been like, I'm lying straight through my.

[B]

No.

[A]

Have you?

[C]

No.

[B]

Never.

[C]

I don't think.

[B]

I can't.

[A]

You can't?

[B]

No.

[C]

I didn't need to do.

[A]

Because you're so in love.

[C]

No, I just. I've never been in a situation where I was like, I need to tell this person I love them so I can get something. Because personal, like, not really a thing with men. I feel like it's like, what a man doesn't want me to tell him that I love him, first of all. And then second of all, with women, I've just never really been in a situation where I needed to tell someone I loved them when I didn't. Yeah, but you have a bunch of times.

[A]

No, no, no.

[C]

Yes, you have.

[B]

Time.

[A]

One time.

[B]

One time.

[C]

One time, Kendall.

[A]

One. One time. Wait, wait.

[B]

One time. I said one time. Someone. They didn't say it before back, and that was tough.

[C]

And did they ever say it back?

[B]

Yeah, they did. Like, maybe, like, a month later.

[C]

That's psycho. What did you do during that month?

[B]

I think that I. Honestly, there was part of me that kind of knew that that was maybe gonna happen because I feel like they had, like, I don't know, like, intimacy. Like, you know, just, like, fears of, like, different stuff or, like, very avoidant or something. So I was, like, mentally prepared. This is actually so sad and so dark. But I got to my. I got myself to a point. This was. Was, like, years ago, and I got myself to the point where I was like, I love this person. I want to tell her, but I can only tell her when I will feel comfortable. If I say it and they don't say it back, that I won't care. So I, like, made myself wait an extra couple of months until I was like, okay. If I say it and they don't say it back, I will be fine with that because I just know that that's how I feel. And then that is what happened. And were you fine with it when it happened? I mean, I was, because I was just like. I was like, okay, I'm not. I don't want someone to say it out of obligation or if they. They don't feel it. Did it feel good? No, it's not at all. It's horrible.

[C]

Kendall and I would have the same reaction if we were like, I love you. The other person didn't say it. We'd be like, okay, well, I didn't

[A]

mean it, and I would not be

[B]

able to I was way too nice about it. Yeah, I mean, like, there's no way to be, like, mean about it. But then, like, they, like. Yeah, it was.

[A]

I was really. I was petty when I dated. I. I would do different now. I don't think I'd be like that as an adult, but when I. I always. You'll regret this. I love saying that to people.

[B]

You're going to regret this. Yeah. Yeah. And honestly, they did so. Sorry. Sorry. Big fumble.

[A]

But I love seeing that you're sorry.

[B]

Parking lot. Big fumble on that one. Or maybe not parking lot. Sounds like they actually were interested in you, but.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Wait, what do you mean, parking lot?

[B]

Just like the Prius story. Like that.

[C]

The parking lot.

[A]

No, that person. I never said I love you because I knew that. I said, this will be too. This is too crazy.

[B]

Yeah, no, yeah, they. Yeah, but it's weird because, like, my friends and stuff, like, when I meet a new friend, like, I can tell a friend that I love them, like, kind of fast.

[A]

When did you know you loved us?

[B]

I knew I loved you guys right away.

[A]

No, you know.

[B]

Yes, I did. Yeah.

[A]

That's how I felt about you, too.

[B]

Yeah. So there. So how can you not believe it

[A]

if you felt that way, too about things that she.

[C]

She experiences or.

[B]

No, I definitely felt that. But then that is weird because then, you know, you're like, See, you know, I think people can have that capacity, for sure.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I think you could feel that with a partner. I think. Yeah, fine. I think it's. You know.

[B]

What's the fastest you've ever said it?

[C]

Probably to you.

[A]

Oh, really?

[B]

How long?

[C]

What, like a month after we.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Well, but also, we were doing long distance. We met not in person. So I think it would have been faster, I think, if we had met in person. The. After our first date, we would have gone home together, hooked up, and said, I love you that night.

[B]

What do you believe? You're. You're not denying it. Which.

[A]

The day after, we text me. I wish I could just take you on a camping trip. What?

[B]

Like, things like that.

[A]

Why are you pushing me? To be clear, please don't set me

[B]

up with anybody that likes camping.

[C]

I ended that, you know, confident I had never been camping.

[B]

That is such a weird.

[C]

Like, it.

[A]

I don't know, you know, but, like, you were saying things like that. That's like, I love you.

[B]

Like, we.

[A]

On our second date, we were doing the Buzzfeed quizzes that were like, what are you gonna have at your wedding to eat?

[B]

Like, we were obsessed. How long did it take before you did the modern love? You know, 20 questions or 36 questions to fall in love? I don't know.

[A]

If you don't even know what that is.

[C]

We still haven't done it. Okay, well, now we have a new podcast episode.

[B]

Okay, well. And there you go. We.

[A]

We need to. Before you go.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

We need to have a conversation. Oh, so we have a new segment.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

Oh, yeah. John, please put up the.

[A]

On our podcast.

[C]

John, please put up the graphic.

[A]

The graphic we're doing. We're deciding. And this is serious. And this is not something serious. This is not something to joke about. Okay, we're picking a third. And. And it's not a joke because we're picking a third. It's serious.

[B]

It's just going to be my head shot.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Well, with the next dance piggy third,

[A]

if you look behind you, it's actually very beautiful.

[C]

John, can we get it up on this screen, too? Hold on.

[A]

See, I. We'll get it up here. Okay, so we had our third. So we had Ash Perez, and then we had Drew. A follow. We did decide on Drew because we wore the same shoe size, which overlaps.

[B]

Whoa.

[A]

Now, this is not something that's. Like, we're actually thinking logistics. Like, we're thinking about how this would work. We're already married. We're happy. You don't need someone just for a fun time. Like, we're trying to think of, like, why this would be good for us. So we need you to pitch to us why you'd be a good third for Jordan and I specifically, because Ash and.

[C]

And Drew both pitch themselves.

[B]

Oh, okay. I mean, I could do that. I just don't want you guys to get too excited.

[A]

You're not even know where you're gonna fall in the bracket yet, and already I'm not liking.

[C]

Yeah, we don't like. We don't like that.

[A]

We want someone who feels.

[B]

I don't care. And that's gonna make you more hooked, so. Because we're all damaged but pitching myself. I mean, we're already friends. We live in the same city. We already love each other. Right. There's already, like, mutual respect and admiration. I think that we all love dogs.

[A]

Ah, okay.

[B]

We're all fun, funny, and our dog would have a lot of fun together. Your dog loves me. I like to read a lot. I keep to myself. You know, I'm pretty independent. I feel like I'm very present.

[A]

You are.

[B]

You know, so I feel like that's a. That's a pro category. I'M a good, like, eater of what I was saying. Food.

[C]

That's right.

[B]

Yeah. Hell, yeah.

[A]

Okay, what about. What do you think?

[B]

Because you guys are always cooking and, like, getting free and, like, I'm a good, like, hype man. You know what I mean? I'm like, this is delicious. Like, oh, my God, this is amazing. Like, I. I bring good vibes.

[A]

What?

[C]

Did you bring good vibes to Jordan,

[A]

specifically, do you think you would be good in a relationship? And then what? To me, specifically, do you think you'd be in a good relationship?

[B]

Okay, let me see. Let me see. Well, I think, like, when I'm tapped into my, like, my, like, grounded, highest self, like, I feel like you're very, like, emotionally intelligent, and you are, like, driven. And so I feel like if I was tapped into that side, like, we could really, like, get a lot of shit done. And I don't think that you. I think I would surprise you with my emotional maturity. And then.

[A]

And you said, and then when I'm at my worst, Kendall and I are just, like, on the same page.

[B]

No, I just know. I mean, yeah, because I'm just thinking of, like, us, like, all as, like, friends. But I feel like with you and I, it would be. Yeah, we would just be, like. We would be out of control, but, like, we would be having a blast. It would probably be upsetting to a lot of people around us.

[C]

The city of Los Angeles would be on fire.

[B]

We would, like, definitely have so much fun. But, yeah, it would not be, like, a good situation.

[A]

You don't think it'd be good? You don't think we'd be good together?

[B]

I mean, for everybody around us? I think, like,

[A]

it would be. It would be. We would be in prison.

[B]

That's when I'd be in, like, prison wouldn't. Yeah. And then you guys would get together

[C]

and within three minutes, walk into the street without paying attention to both. You get hit by a car.

[A]

Do you like water parks? Yes, I've. Every summer, I feel like we should go to water park together, because every summer I want to go, but people get a little. They're not interested. It's a little dreamy.

[B]

No.

[A]

And I feel like we would have fun.

[B]

I would love to. No, I mean, come on.

[A]

That's how it goes.

[B]

You go. Yeah, exactly.

[C]

All right, Carol. Well, thank you, Carol.

[A]

Did you hear that? Yeah.

[C]

He said, all right. Not say Carol. Okay, before we go, do you guys

[B]

both have ankle braces on or.

[C]

Just Kendall.

[A]

Just Kendall.

[B]

Feel like I'm in a hospital room right now.

[C]

Kendall fell down leaving a gay bar the other night and st. Literally non stop Kendall. If Kendall wants anything, she left the house and walked decently far to get herself a bunch of Gatorades the other day.

[B]

Oh, that's.

[C]

But then if I'm like, hey, can

[A]

you give me one thing?

[C]

She. She's like, I can't. My leg is broken. I'm like, oh, yeah?

[A]

Well, it is. Well, I tried the walk to get Gatorades and it was too far for me. And then when I came back, I tried to set a new expectation that I wouldn't be walking anymore.

[B]

Right.

[A]

So if we were thruffle, you would be our caregivers and we would hopefully bring some. I think you're hopefully bring. Also it'd be bad because if we were in a throuple, Jordan, we'd be trying to have a serious conversation. Like, we'd be fighting. Like, we would be such a serious conversation. You would be making me laugh so hard.

[B]

Hard.

[A]

I can. Like, already. It would be so bad. And I can feel Jordan pulling me aside. I feel like you've had to probably do this even with just us being friends. Be like, Kendall, just take it serious with Cara.

[B]

Be serious.

[A]

Yeah, take it serious with Cara.

[B]

I wish you'd be.

[A]

No one makes me laugh like Cara does.

[B]

I wish you'd be more serious with me.

[C]

No one makes me laughs like Cara.

[A]

Honestly, no one makes me laugh like Cara. Well, because it's like. It is like, I feel high when I'm around Kara. Okay. No, she's up for grandma. You make me laugh. You make me laugh in, like, a real man.

[B]

No, Kara, you make me like that.

[A]

No, not like that.

[B]

That.

[A]

No one makes me laugh like you do. Of course, but I mean, like, specifically the way I laugh around Cara. It's like, I can't. Like, if I feel drunk, like, it's like, it's not even. Honestly, what they're saying isn't even funny. Like, Carol will just be like, dumplings.

[C]

Am I right?

[A]

Like, it doesn't even make any sense. And I'm like, it's the funniest thing I've ever heard in my life.

[B]

Why am I getting in trouble?

[A]

Because you guys are saying to me, cara's not funny. Cara's not funny. I'm still laughing.

[C]

This actually sucks.

[A]

You're not picked.

[C]

This actually sucks.

[A]

You weren't picked. I'm sorry, we can't.

[C]

We don't know, because we have to see who are not. Next guest is. And then they'll go, wow, I. I already Decided you haven't made it to this. Damn.

[B]

I know. And that's. And you guys are so real for that. But bring me next time you go to a gay bar and you guys can wingman me.

[C]

Do it. And then you can make sure Kendall doesn't fall.

[A]

You can carry me, and then I'll

[B]

go to K. And then I'll go get some gatos.

[C]

Oh, my God. All right, well, that's the end of this episode. Kira, thank you so much for being here.

[A]

We love you people.

[C]

Find you.

[B]

We love you guys. You know, you could find me online at that Cara Cons comedy.

[A]

And Cara has. Cara is one of the funniest standup comedians on earth, truly. So go watch.

[B]

You watch my special on Amazon.

[C]

You're so funny.

[A]

Truly. So funny. So go listen to Cara everywhere you can. They really need it right now. I do.

[C]

They really.

[B]

I really need to win right now.

[A]

You really need a win right now.

[C]

Give Car a win. You know, and if you want to date car, drop it in the comments. Oh, my God.

[A]

Yeah, you be kind to dating a listener. Yeah, we have really cool listeners. A lot of Australian listeners too, if you like an accent.

[B]

I. Yeah, I mean, accents are fine. I'm not really trying to find somebody that lives like 35 hours ago on a plane ride.

[C]

Okay, so there you go. Now you know your limitation.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Well, thank you so much for listening. Be sure to subscribe to our Patreon. Can you pull it together for just the outro? Be sure to subscribe to our Patreon. Like, comment, subscribe, watch it on YouTube. Listen wherever you get your podcast. Podcast. Just help us keep making money so we can keep making this podcast.

[B]

Yeah, baby.

[A]

Have a great week.

[B]

Marketing is hard, but I'll tell you a little secret.

[A]

It doesn't have to be. Let me point something out. You're listening to a podcast right now and it's great. You love the host. You seek it out and download it. You listen to it while driving, working out, cooking, even going to the bathroom. Podcasts are a pretty close companion. And this is a podcast ad. Did I get your attention? Mention you can reach great listeners like yourself with podcast advertising from Libsyn Ads. Choose from hundreds of top podcasts offering host endorsements or run a pre produced

[B]

ad like this one across thousands of shows.

[A]

To reach your target audience in their favorite podcasts with Libsyn ads, go to Libsynads.com that's L, I B S Y N ads.com today.