80: My First Lesbian Breakup Ruined My LIFE

Summary

Podcast Summary: Happy Wife, Happy Life

Episode 80: "My First Lesbian Breakup Ruined My LIFE"
Hosts: Kendahl Landreth & Jordan Myrick
Release Date: September 8, 2025

---

Episode Overview

This episode is all about the unique dynamics, anxieties, and advice around first queer relationships, travel as a couple, relationship labels, and the pressures of lesbian/queer dating. Kendahl and Jordan, in their signature unfiltered and loving banter, answer listener questions about long-distance crushes, "U-haul" lesbian relationship timelines, travel tips for couples, and whether marriage is defined by a legal certificate or the life you build with someone. The discussion is laced with their own relationship anecdotes, tackle cultural microaggressions, and deliver their takes on American vs. European food habits—all while maintaining their comedic, warm, and honest style.

---

Key Discussion Points & Timestamps

1. Life & Personal Updates (00:29–04:08)

• Kendahl updates on finally getting floors in their house and a possible rib fracture:
  “They think that they're realizing maybe my seizure and all my problems is because the whole time I've had a broken rib.” (01:10 – Kendahl)
• Angel, their dog, enjoys a new snuffle mat.
• They’re now on Cameo and planning to visit Kendahl’s mom.
• Recap of the weekend: documentary watching, coloring, sushi, and relaxing at home.

---

2. Listener Q&A – Relationship & Wedding Questions (04:08–07:53)

• Keeping Secrets for Surprises
  Jordan: "You have to forget about the secret. If you're constantly thinking about the secret, it's going to consume you, and you're going to want to tell them immediately." (04:23)

• Engagement Rings
  Both wear their rings daily and recommend not taking them off to avoid losing them.
  “The best advice I could give is just never take it off.” (04:46 – Kendahl)

• Flower Girl Dilemma
  If a friend doesn’t want her child to be flower girl, respect the boundary.
  “It is not, like, a legal requirement to have a flower girl.” (05:40 – Jordan)

---

3. Navigating Long-Distance Crushes & Relationships (06:02–08:07)

• Kendahl and Jordan share their own experience starting as a long-distance couple.
• Advice for long-distance crushes:
  • Keep communication similar to what you’d do locally.
  • Don’t let texting become the whole relationship.
  • Plan virtual dates, but keep the pace natural.
  • “If it just becomes...all just texting, stuff can become weird.” (07:21 – Jordan)

---

4. Travel Advice for Couples (08:07–16:59)

• Travel Card Points:
  • Get a credit card with points/miles for frequent visits.
  • “You're throwing away free money, and credit is going to struggle because of it.” (09:28 – Kendahl)
• Arguments While Traveling:
  • High-stake travel often breeds arguments due to fatigue, stress, expectations.
  • “Sometimes you're tired, you're hungry, you're spending a lot of money, so things can feel very high stakes.” (11:30 – Jordan)
• Setting Realistic Expectations & Flexibility:
  • Kendahl: “I just don't think about that. I just am like, oh, now we're going, I'll see what it's like.” (12:18)
  • Jordan suggests scheduling downtime and not over-planning.
  • Avoid focusing only on “Instagram famous” sights; enjoy spontaneous moments.
  • “Some of our favorite moments are these unexpected moments.” (14:52 – Kendahl)
• Packing & Souvenirs:
  • Pack together to avoid redundancy; try on outfits in advance.
  • Bring an expandable bag for shopping/bringing things home:
    “On the way back, [the bag] gets big and you can fill it with so much stuff.” (16:45 – Kendahl)

---

5. The “First Lesbian Relationship” Dilemma (17:00–26:12)

• Listener Email: Fear of intensity/quick progression in first queer relationship (“U-hauling”) and being “messed up” by a possible breakup.
• Advice on “First Lesbian High” vs. Serious Connection
  • It’s normal to bond quickly; the “high” is often genuine but can feel destabilizing.
  • “Do you want the same things? Do you like the same things? … If they line up and you're feeling in love, great.” (19:21 – Jordan)
  • The fear of losing control or things blowing up isn't helpful—you're always able to step back or shift dynamics.
  • “You're in complete control. It's not going to blow up in your face if you don't let it blow up in your face.” (20:41 – Kendahl)
  • Fear is natural but not productive; honesty and self-awareness are key.
• Breakup Impact
  • Both hosts discuss breakups with men and women; sometimes the stereotype (“first lesbian breakup destroys you”) is overblown, especially for bi women.
  • “Every relationship will affect you differently, but you're fine now and I'm fine now.” (26:04 – Jordan)

---

6. Labels: Marriage vs. “Being Married” (27:16–32:08)

• A listener asks: is it valid to call your partner husband/wife even without a legal marriage?
• Kendahl: Uses “wife” for professionalism and because “girlfriend” doesn’t reflect their household.
• Jordan: “You don't realize how much paperwork there is and how much stuff you have to do... It’s a very cumbersome experience.” (28:50)
• Consensus: It doesn’t matter what other people think; call your partner what feels authentic, legal status aside.

Memorable Analogy:

“If all of a sudden gay people couldn't get married, would that mean... their relationship is illegitimate?... Of course not.” (43:06 – Jordan)

---

7. Cultural Tangents: Food Shame and American Stereotypes (32:08–45:07)

• Extended, spirited discussion of European/American food portion discourse and online shaming.
• Observations on UK diet sodas, fake sugars, lack of “real” Coke, and “ice in drinks.”
• “You cannot take one breath, you cannot have one single bite of a sandwich online without a white European in your comments being like, 'It's so devastating to see America...' Shut up.” (34:05 – Jordan)
• Both vent about microaggressions regarding where they're "really from".
• Kendahl and Jordan share funny, memorable stories about food abroad, food snobbery, and their unique packing habits.

---

8. Dealing with Unsolicited Opinions (41:16–44:00)

• The underlying lesson: Most people’s opinions are just personal preferences or projections.
• “If someone's not asking you for your opinion, you might not need to give it.” (41:38 – Jordan)
• Reassurance to listeners: Your relationship labels and choices belong to you—not the random European commenter, not the nosy coworker.

---

9. Patreon, Book Club & Community Announcements (46:16–47:44)

• Kendahl and Jordan highlight their Patreon, upcoming book club (with “Sapphic, steamy romance” and “nonfiction or spooky, scary” picks), live chats, and more extra content.
• Invites listeners to join for a more personal, interactive experience.

---

10. Closing Words—Notable Quotes

• “Thank you so much for listening. And, Jordan, thank you so much for being my wife. And I'll say it, and I don't care.” (48:18 – Kendahl)
• “And in protest, after this recording, I'm gonna go get you a Dr. Pepper filled with sugar, honey.” (48:23 – Kendahl)
• “Call your partner whatever makes you happy. Label your sexuality, however makes you happy.” (43:32 – Jordan)

---

Notable Quotes & Moments

• “You're in complete control. It's not going to blow up in your face if you don't let it blow up in your face.” (20:41 – Kendahl)
• “Fear is never productive in a relationship.” (22:52 – Jordan)
• “If someone's not asking you for your opinion, you might not need to give it.” (41:38 – Jordan)

---

Tone & Takeaways

In their classic, irreverent but earnest style, Kendahl and Jordan reassure listeners to trust their instincts, communicate openly, and build the relationships and lives that feel right to them—certificates or cultural approval be damned. They remind us that fear and shame (whether in relationships or cultural squabbles about food) are best left behind, and unexpected joy is often just a koi pond—or a sugary Dr. Pepper—away.

---

This episode is a must-listen for anyone who’s navigating a new queer relationship, fighting the pressure of stereotypes, or wants a hearty laugh about travel, food, and love.

Transcript

[A]

Back to school is better. With family freedom from T Mobile, we'll pay off four phones up to $3200 and give you four free phones, all on America's largest 5G network. Visit your local T Mobile location or learn more@t mobile.com familyfreedom. Up to $800 per line via virtual prepaid card. Typically takes 15 days. Free phones via 24 monthly bill credits with finance agreement eg Apple iPhone 16, 128 gigabyte 8, $2009.99 eligible trade in eg iPhone 11 Pro for well qualified credits end and balance due if you pay off early or cancel contact T Mobile.

[B]

Welcome to Happy Wife, Happy Life. We're your host. I'm KE Landrum.

[C]

And I'm Jordan Myrick.

[B]

And we are two incredibly unqualified but.

[C]

Deeply in love comedians who are here to help you with all things relationships. And on today's episode, we're answering all the questions you have about love. Hey, Ken.

[B]

Hey, Jord.

[C]

How you doing? Good. How are you? So many questions. I'm like, what's a quick debrief? A quick debrief?

[B]

Well, okay. We finally are gonna have floors in our house soon.

[C]

On wood. Not jinx it. I won't even talk about it because I'm scared that it's not going to happen.

[B]

Yeah, we might have floors soon.

[C]

Maybe.

[B]

Quick update, health wise. They think that they're realizing maybe my seizure and all my problems is because the whole time I've had a broken rib. Enough said about that.

[C]

No clue how it happened, but that's what we're investigating medically now.

[B]

Angel's doing great. She got a new snuffle mat that she's enjoying incredibly.

[C]

It looks like carrots planted in the ground.

[B]

Yes, it does. We got cameo.

[C]

We have Cameo now, which is really exciting. Huge.

[B]

What else is going on? We're going up to visit my mom next week, which I'm really looking forward to.

[C]

I think it'll be really nice. I think we're going to have to cancel some of the activities, which you don't want to do, but I think we might need to.

[B]

I don't know. I think I'm going to have to see. I have the activity, Jordan, speaking of, is a canoeing or kayaking experience. But I think I should be fine. I just need an update from my doctor, which is basically to see how bad this fracture. I keep saying broken rib. It's not broken, it's a fracture. I was doing that more for, like, effect, like dramatic, for attention. And I Was lying for attention.

[C]

This is my thing. You don't need to wait to hear from your doctor. You don't feel good. I mean, you do know you do need to go talk to your doctor. You do need to see what the issue.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

But ultimately, like, you're not doing well.

[B]

I just want to see how I'm feeling the next couple days. Because what I will say is these last four days is the first time I've really rested, because up until this point, they've been like, well, you're fine. It's just, like, an issue around your lungs, so, like, you can continue physical activity. So I've been going to the gym. I've been doing all this stuff, and if I'd known I had a fractured rib, I probably wouldn't have been doing that. So you said yesterday, and I agreed. It's like, this is the first time I've let it breathe at all. And I'm like, maybe the healing will, you know, speed up a little bit. Anyway, so that's an update we have.

[C]

That's an update. I'll let you know on whether or not we go kayaking.

[B]

But we've been watching. We just watched Mr. And Mrs.

[C]

Murder.

[B]

What?

[C]

Mr. And what?

[B]

Are we gonna do this again?

[C]

Mr. And miseries.

[B]

Mr. I pronounce miseries. Miseries. How do you say it?

[C]

Ms. Mrs.

[B]

I think that's. I'm not even gonna do this with you today. I'm pretty sure that's a different thing.

[C]

Nope.

[B]

Mr. Means unmarried. Miseries is married.

[C]

No, miss it. Ms. Is unmarried. Mrs. Is married.

[B]

Okay. We just watched Mr. Mrs. Murder. If you guys haven't seen this documentary, it is pretty wild.

[C]

I don't want to be rude. I don't think it's that wild.

[B]

It wasn't that wild, but it was very normal. I don't know if normal is the word I would use to describe someone like.

[C]

You won't believe the twist. No spoilers. Kendall. I know.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

That's what I thought. Kendall loves a spoiler. Kendall will be like, no, no, it's not a spoiler. It's not a spoiler. They all die. And I'm like, kendall, that is a spoiler.

[B]

But we watched a documentary. We had a really good day. We had a really good Saturday.

[C]

Oh, we had a great Saturday.

[B]

We laid in bed all day. Well, I went. I had to film some stuff in the morning, so Jordan and Charles and I went and filmed, and then we cleaned up the house a little bit. And then by the time we were done cleaning, it was already, like, noon. It was only like, noon. And so we had the whole day, and we laid in bed all day, and I colored in my coloring book.

[C]

What a treat.

[B]

And watched a documentary, and it was an absolute treat. And we ordered sushi for dinner. Okay, enough about us.

[C]

We're sick of it.

[B]

Let's get into the questions.

[C]

Let's get right into the questions. How do you successfully keep a surprise secret for your partner who loves surprises?

[B]

I couldn't answer that. I have no idea. You'd be better to answer that. I can't keep a secret for two minutes.

[C]

You have to forget about the secret. You have to put it out of your mind. If you're constantly thinking about the secret, it's going to consume you, and you're going to want to tell them immediately. It will be worth it. Just put the secret out of your mind.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah, that's good.

[C]

Sorry. Do you plan on wearing your engagement rings every day once you're married?

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Spoiler alert. We already wear our engagement rings every day. Yeah, Kendall's is getting resized, so she's not wearing.

[B]

I know, but mine's getting resized. But, yeah, we already wear our engagement rings every day. I never take mine off. When we were at a jeweler getting your ring, he was like, the best advice I could give is just never take it off. Because when I started with my engagement ring, I took it off to shower, I took it off to sleep, and I was just never wearing it. It was just. I took it off to do the.

[C]

Dishes, and you're gonna lose it.

[B]

And now I just keep it on. Now. I don't know. I'm sure that's, like, not the best care for the ring itself, but I just have decided I need to just never take it off ever, because otherwise I will leave it places, and I do not want to lose it. And you don't take yours off. Really?

[C]

I never take mine off. But also, I love it. It's so stunning.

[B]

Yeah, it's.

[C]

Look at it. It's beautiful. How can I convince a friend of mine to have her child be the flower girl in my wedding?

[B]

Convinced.

[C]

Why doesn't your friend want this?

[B]

Yeah. That's interesting. I guess I'm like, if your friend really doesn't want it, then just, you don't need to have her daughter be your flower girl.

[C]

Unfortunately, yes. It is not, like, a legal requirement to have a flower girl.

[B]

No, but it should be a fun thing. I don't think you would need to do much convincing if you're, like, Oh, I just haven't asked yet. Then just ask. But if she's like, no, then I would just leave it at that. It's not.

[C]

Yeah. I don't know why your friend would say no, but if she did, there's really nothing you can do about it.

[B]

Yeah, no, Nothing you can do about it.

[C]

Sorry.

[B]

Sorry.

[C]

Any advice on if you have a crush on someone who doesn't live in the same city as you?

[B]

Well, that's fine. That's how we started dating, I think. I think just continuing to do a little open flirting on the Instagram, maybe be like, we should do a zoom wine night or something and pitch something like that. But I don't think that's a big deal at all.

[C]

I think you just have to treat it like having a crush on someone that lives in the same city as you. Which maybe you're like, duh. But I think it takes effort because I think when someone is long distance, a lot of times what it becomes is just you non stop texting.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And then I think once you meet, it can make the vibe weird because you're like, oh, we really haven't spent any time with each other, but we've been non stop texting. We know so much. We've had so many, like, deep emotional, like, moments. Like, I think it can just be like, a little dicey. So I would say, like, take it slow. Plan dates, zoom dates, phone call dates, whatever. Text normally, but text the same amount you would text someone that lived in the same.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Places.

[B]

Did you feel that way when we met in person?

[C]

No, but I think we acted very normally leading up to.

[B]

I see what you're saying.

[C]

Yeah. Like, I do think we, you know, we had zoom dates and we texted and whatever, but it was like I wasn't all consumed by it. Do you know what I mean?

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

So I think that's something really important because I think if it just becomes. And in any relationship, this can happen. If it's all just texting, stuff can become weird. But yeah, it that I feel like happens less when you're in person because you're like, well, we went on a date last night, so I don't want to text them again. I want to bombard them, blah, blah, whatever. But if you're never seeing each other, you're kind of like, oh, all we have is text.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

I think it can get a little much and it very quickly can get very personal.

[B]

Yes, totally.

[C]

And I just think you got to let things, like, build at a normal pace. You Know what I mean? Do you agree?

[B]

I agree. I do.

[C]

That's what I think. If you could give travel advice and tips to couples traveling long distance for the first time, what would it be? Ooh. So this is a couple long distance relationship. They're traveling for the first time. What's the advice?

[B]

Okay.

[C]

Get a credit card with points.

[B]

Oh.

[C]

For whatever the airline is that goes to the place that they live.

[B]

I love that.

[C]

If you're really locking it down, if this is the real deal.

[B]

Wait, I may. Maybe I'm misunderstanding. I'm thought they were asking. They're traveling together.

[C]

Oh, hold on. Let me read it again. If you could give travel advice to couples traveling long distance for the first time, what would it be? Am I wrong?

[B]

Traveling long distance. I guess to me, that's reading a couple who's going on a long distance vacation traveling a long distance for the first time.

[C]

Oh, my gosh. Okay. Well, do you disagree? No. I'm confused. Genuinely so. Okay, then I guess we're answering two questions, because what I said about the first one, but I also think it's true for anyone. Get a credit card with miles. I didn't get a credit card until, like, four years ago.

[B]

I know. When we met, I don't think you had a credit card, and I had a debit card. Jordan, you need to get a credit card. And you were like, well, but I think a lot of you are very scared of getting a credit card. And I think you were like this, where you were like, well, I don't. Don't want to spend any money I don't have. And I was like, 100%. But that's how anyone who uses a credit card should be operating. Now, granted, most people do not operate that way, but you really should never be spending money on a credit card that you don't have. Is this a financial podcast?

[C]

Yeah. What's going on right now?

[B]

I'm literally so good.

[C]

She's an analyst.

[B]

But you really should never be spending money you don't have. But I'm like, you are throwing away free money. You're literally just. You are throwing away free money, and credit is going to struggle because of it.

[C]

And now Kendall and I mostly travel on points, and it rocks.

[B]

Well, literally, Jordan gets so excited because I use credit cards all the time, but I am not someone who's keeping up to date on, like, how much I'm saving and what. I mean, whatever. Jordan will be like, guess how much we saved using our card on this trip? And it's like $2,000.

[C]

So satisfying. I love it. Traveling together. I'm sorry, this chair's really loud. Can you guys hear that? Hold on. If you're just listening to the podcast, it sounds like Kendall and are going to town on each other while giving you advice. We're not. This church just so squeaky. And Kendall, what did you thought I farted? I thought you fart. I don't want to say, but I literally thought you fart. You think that I would fart on the podcast and not acknowledge it and not be like, oh, sorry, John. And can we take a pause and reshoot that? You think I'm just blasting him out, not even acknowledging it?

[B]

No, but I could see if you just did it. And then we're like, I don't. I don't want. Maybe no one heard it. And then you tried to squeak your chair to cover it up to be.

[C]

Like, it was a squeak.

[B]

And then I just. But I had already laughed, so I grow up.

[C]

Sorry, that's absolutely ridiculous. Of course that's not what I did. I don't even remember what I was saying now. Oh, travel advice. I think that traveling high stakes travel situations breed arguments.

[B]

Oh, I don't find that we argue that much when we travel. We've had some. We've had some. Clearly. I don't even know we're arguing so much. I don't even know when we're arguing.

[C]

No, no, no.

[B]

I thought we weren't arguing. We've had arguments on trips, but we also travel a lot. But I don't find that we've had, like, travel induced arguments. Do you know what I mean?

[C]

I agree with you, but I'm talking about in general, not just for you. And I totally. I think that it's like you're tired sometimes. You're hungry.

[B]

You're spending a lot of money.

[C]

You're spending a lot of money so things can feel very high stakes. You're in a new environment.

[B]

You want it to be awesome, you.

[C]

Want it to be great, you want everything to be perfect. You. Whether or not you realize it or express it to your partner, you have an ideal way in your mind's eye that this trip would go see.

[B]

And that's why I sometimes. I'm sorry, but I think that I am the perfect partner for you because I genuinely don't have that. Yeah, like, we're like, I don't have any thoughts. I'm so. This sounds so annoying, but I do feel like I'm very. Moment to moment. So you'll be like, like, for example, we're going to Italy next month. I'm so excited. I'm like, oh, my God, it's going to be so fun. I have not pictured any part of it, but because I'm like, I don't even know what Italy looks like.

[C]

I need to counter that because I think you're right and I think that is very beautiful about you. On the other hand, I've traveled a lot in my life. Most of my family works, the airlines. I've traveled a lot in my life, so I kind of know how to do travel. So you don't really have to worry about.

[B]

I don't have to plan, but that's not what I'm saying. I guess I think those are different things because I know that it's because you're such a good planner that I don't have to plan. Yeah. But I think a lot of people still get a picture in their head. They're picturing themselves on the coast, how it's going to look, the dinners are going to look, how everything's going to look. And I just don't think about that. I just am like, oh, now we're going, I'll see what it's like. That's how I feel. So I think it allows us to, like, enjoy the things that are enjoyable. Because I'm not like, comparing it to something I pictured in my head.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Which is how I go through life. I feel like.

[C]

I think that. I think that's 100% right. I think what's important on a trip is making sure you're both doing things and getting to do things that you want to do. I think not putting too much pressure on the trip itself. And I think scheduling in planned time for relaxation.

[B]

Yes.

[C]

I think if you're like, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go. You are going to get tired. You are going to get cranky. That is going to breed arguments.

[B]

And also sometimes I. I'm just very like, anti for myself. Some people love doing this, but I'm anti, like, going to places to take a picture. Like, I think there's so many places in every country we've traveled to where it's like, well, you can wake up at 6am and go to this place and wait in line for three hours to get a picture in front of this thing. And then you're like, what is the thing? And someone's like, I don't know. It's just kind of like this, like, thing. It's like a temple from. Okay, what happened there? I don't Know, it's like. Which is. There's no judgment in that. I would also not know. But it's like, why do you care about this thing? Wouldn't you have more enjoyed, like, I don't know, doing something that's fun for you instead of, like, getting a photo to post on the Internet?

[C]

Do you know what I mean? Sure.

[B]

Now, some people I get, if you're like, there are things I'd want to take a picture of in front of. Like, if I go to the Leaning Tower of Pisa, I'm going to want to take a picture in front of the Leaning Tower of Pisa, of course. But there are hundreds and thousands and thousands of things like that where it's like, nobody even knows what this is, but it's, like, viral on Instagram, so people want to take a picture of it with it. And I just think that is not how I like to travel. And I feel like it's a good mix of the two a little bit. And we will have days where it's like, okay, well, which, you know, is a privilege. If you have extra time in a place you're expecting an extended period of time in a place, you can take a day to be like, we're just going to kind of shop and bop and kind of see where the day takes us. We have one dinner. I feel like you're good about being like. But we do have, like, at least one plan every day. Like, tonight we have a dinner at this place that I've researched. I'm excited about.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

And I feel like some of our favorite moments on during travel are these unexpected moments. Like, I always think about when we went to Taiwan, you and Andrew had planned so many amazing things, and we had such a great time. But all of us, at the end of the trip was one of our favorite moments was after we went into this little restaurant that we just happened to walk into. Afterwards, we went outside and there was a koi pond. Yes. And we all fed koi fish. And it was, like, unplanned, unexpected. Just like a free thing that this park had. And it was so fun. And so you want to leave room for moments like that.

[C]

You're 100% right. I completely agree with you.

[B]

But honestly, you should be speaking on the travel because you're the travel expert. I truly am. Just the epitome of, like, following along on a traveling trip.

[C]

No, I think that's true. And I also think that you should pack together, because I think you want to make sure you're not redundantly packing. I'm all about like streamlining packing because Kendall and I love a souvenir. We love to go shopping on vacation. So I'm you buy a lot. You do too. And I think like, unless you guys use two different shampoos like packed together so you know that like one of you is packing shampoo, if you, you know what I mean, like don't pack like well.

[B]

And Jordan makes me do this thing that I now say, okay, that was good. This is good. But I used to push back on it a lot because I was, to be hon honest, just lazy. I didn't really want to do it, but Jordan will be like, you need to try on every outfit before we pack it. And I used to be like, please, like you're being insane. But I used to pack so many clothes and then like not even really know what I was going to be wearing. Like I was kind of just like, I'm going to bring all these pants and all these shirts and then we'll see like kind of what happens. But when I put on each outfit and then I'm like, wait, this looks so cute now. I'm excited about this outfit. I'm excited to wear it and I pack it away. We pack so much less. You also have this good tip. This isn't really traveling as a couple, but traveling as a person. You get one of those tiny bag or those bags that you squish up and put in the suitcase.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

And then on the way back gets big and you can fill it with so much stuff and then use that as the carry on.

[C]

Yeah, it's awesome.

[B]

I think that's smart.

[C]

I'm actually, I've been thinking about making like a long form YouTube video about this because I'm unbelievable at packing and.

[B]

You should do like a travel like my 10 tips for travel.

[C]

Okay. If you want it, drop it in the comments, let me know. This person wrote in an email. They said. Hello, Jordan and Kendall, huge fan of the pod. You two make me look forward to my commute to work. Oh my God, I love that for some context. I am a 26 year old bi woman. I've gone out with men, women and non binary people but only seriously dated men. I met my now girlfriend a few months ago. My last relationship ended badly so I was hesitant about getting into another relationship. I went into it casually and ended up really falling for her. Some of my friends have made jokes about the quote lesbian dating timeline, u hauling fast engagements etc. I really care about my girlfriend and can potentially see a future with her. She's been in queer relationships before that have moved at a faster pace. My sister has also warned me about how a lot of queer women, their first woman loving woman, relation woman love a woman, their first WLW relationship is short term but very intense and can mess you up. I have told my girlfriend I want to take things slower and she's okay with that. This is definitely the fastest I've ever really bonded with a romantic partner, but I'm scared of blowing it up in my face. Do you have any advice on how to tell the difference between first time dating a woman high and a serious connection? Keep doing what you're doing.

[B]

Keep doing what you're doing.

[C]

That's so sweet. Thank you so much. First of all, for your email. This, I feel like, is such a common and normal question. So if you're feeling stressed about it, truly do not.

[B]

Because every Jordan still feels this way. It's about me. Jordan's like, I'm like, it's just, is.

[C]

This just a high? Am I just riding high on love or is this real? I think you have to look at the practicality of it. I think if you're feeling like, wow, I'm so in love and you barely know anything about them, be for real with yourself. But if you're like a couple months in how many, how long had you been dating? What'd you say? Do you remember Kendall?

[B]

No.

[C]

Oh, sorry, bubba, forgot. You've never remembered anything? I shouldn't have asked.

[B]

Why would you ask me that?

[C]

I know, I'm so sorry. I can't believe I asked you if you remembered something from two seconds ago. Okay, hold on, hold on. I figured a few months ago. Okay, so they've been seeing each other, knowing each other for a few months.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

I think if you're feeling, oh my gosh, I'm so in love. It's been a few months. Do the things line up? Do you want the same things? Do you like the same things? Do you like their friends? Do you think they handle situations well? Do you, you know, like all of those things, if they line up and you're feeling in love, great.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

What's so wrong with that?

[B]

I also think one of the greatest things you can have in life is the knowledge that things aren't just going to blow up in your face without you having any control.

[C]

Yes.

[B]

Now minus maybe like natural disasters and.

[C]

Things like that, or obviously horrible things.

[B]

Can happen that are out of your control. But I think I hear so many people in relationships while people who are not in relationships being like Well, I just, like, don't want to hurt her. Or I'm scared. I think it's all a cop out, but I think I'm scared that, like, it's going to end bad or I'm scared that it's going to be so good that it fucks me. You know what I mean? All these things where I'm like. And not that I, I, I totally understand that fear of, like, am I going into something too fast? I don't think that's a cop out, but I do think you're in complete control. It's not going to blow up in your face if you don't let it blow up in your face. And I, I feel I see so many people who just, like their lives never are what they want it to be because they're so afraid of it turning out, turning into something that they don't want, being like, as if they don't have any control. I see it all the time. We're watching Bachelor on Paradise. The guys are like, I'm just scared I'm going to hurt her. Now. Those guys are giving a cop out. But I am like, you have control or whether or not you want this person, if you don't want to cheat on her, you won't. And if you decide to, you're not completely out of control.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And I think with relationships, if you're afraid of going into it too fast, know that through your entire relationship and Jordan and I are five years in, at any moment, you can take a step back and go, here's how I want to shift the way our relationship is working right now. Like, maybe I realize three years in, I feel like we're spending a little too much time together. I want to spend a little more me time. You can make that shift.

[C]

You just have to vocalize it. You got to vocalize it. You got to be honest about it.

[B]

It doesn't need to be. It's all out of your control, and you have to have it all figured out. I'm sure if I, if Jordan and I sat and watched a video of us from our first year of dating, we would be like, oh, I would do this different. Or we maybe would have had this conversation different, whatever. But it doesn't matter because it doesn't mean that that ruined the rest of our relationship. It's fine. It's like, you just live and you grow and you'll figure it out, and you might look back in 10 years and be like, good Lord, we really ran into that one, didn't we? But if you let yourself have the knowledge that you're in control the whole time, you can always take a step back. Not from the relationship. Well, you could, but you can always just take a step back and be like, wait, let's slow it down a little bit. When the next step comes of moving in together, maybe you can be like, I love being like really committed to you, but I think I want to take a little more time to do the moving in together. You're just always in control.

[C]

Yeah, absolutely. I also think you have to remember, like, if you're a woman and you start dating a woman for the first time, I, even though I'm a big believer in dating, is dating is dating. Like women can hurt you, men can hurt you, non binary people can hurt you. Any of those people can be bad partners, whatever. I do feel like sometimes when two girlies get together, a lot of the kind of like societal things that we do around heterosexuality, heteronormativity, like those things don't exist anymore sometimes. So it can make you feel a lot closer to someone a lot more quickly. So I would say like, don't be so scared of that. Just be honest with yourself about what it is. I think.

[B]

Yeah. Because I think it makes sense you would quick more quickly connect with another woman than it than you would a CIS man.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Because you already have. It's like how I would connect with someone who is from the same city I'm from.

[C]

Yeah. And also like with men, right. A lot of times you're trying to suss out like, oh, is this person even like safe maybe? Or whatever the thing is. And a lot of times you don't have to do that as much with women or you know, we're not socialized do that with, with women as much as we're with men or whatever. So I think that like, take those things into account. I think the big takeaway for you to remember is that fear is never productive in a relationship. Which doesn't mean you're never going to feel it, but I think like feel it, clock it for what it is and then move forward. But like living in fear, sitting in fear, that's either you're in a bad relationship and you should get out of it or you're having your own internal emotional stuff and you need to like deal with that too because what did the sister say? That your first.

[B]

It will fudge you up. I think she said, right.

[C]

Breakup can, can mess you up. And when you enter a lesbian relationship.

[B]

I get that, but I kind of like that's not a reason to not do something. I think it's like, is it gonna you up? Like, I. I just think that's a bit much.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

I think maybe for a couple months. My first lesbian relationship, which was also my first relationship, we were together literally maybe two months, and it fucked me up.

[C]

This is what I'll say, though.

[B]

Months.

[C]

But I was though my first relationship with a woman. When we broke up, it didn't affect me that much. Yeah, My first relationship with a man. My first relationship with a man was my first relationship.

[B]

That's what I.

[C]

Serious relationship.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

So I think that's also a big thing because if you've only ever casually dated men, and then you start seriously dating a woman, I think that first relationship with a woman, if you break up, it's going to be devastating. I also feel like sometimes you can feel things more of like. Like I said, you'll feel like closer to women more quickly or whatever. So I think a sooner breakup can feel more harsh.

[B]

Well, also, I don't know, maybe I'm wrong. I'm not really on this side of the Internet, but I'm like, if you're bisexual, that feels totally different because I feel like I've heard that first lesbian relationship type trope about people who are gay and have dated men, and we're.

[C]

Dating people they didn't want to date, and now they're dating someone, they dated.

[B]

A woman, and they're like, oh, my.

[C]

God, I'm having legal feelings.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

The first time.

[B]

Versus I'm like, if you're bisexual, I feel like it's not gonna be that different. Maybe the first couple dates might be. I don't know. But like, if you're in a serious relationship with a man and you're bisexual, and then you're in a serious relationship with a woman, I can't speak to this, but I feel like it would probably feel similar.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think for me, like, I said, like, my first breakup after a serious relationship with a woman, I was like, whatever. We, like, obviously weren't compatible. So it was like, fine.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

But my first boyfriend ever. I mean, my first. The first person ever dated. Seriously. We started dating when I was 14, and we broke up when I was 18. It was like, very long and very serious and very tumultuous. So it was like, that was much more of a thing. Does that mean I'm not gay? No, it doesn't. Like, it's not. It's just kind of like every relationship will affect you differently, but you're fine now and I'm fine now. Even that, that was bad for me off and on for quite some time. But I still ultimately, and when I say it was bad for me, I had some emotional repercussions of that. But I was still ultimately fine because, God, no, I don't know what, what.

[B]

Doesn'T kill you makes you stronger.

[C]

And that's all we can sing. And that's all we can sing. Or else we'll get demonetized.

[B]

Today's episode is sponsored by Good Wipes. We all have those favorite bathroom products and Good Wipes has just earned a permanent spot in the lineup. They're flushable plant based wipes for the bathroom. Basically, they're a toilet paper upgrade. They're soft, soothing and safe for sensitive skin. 40% bigger and stronger than your average wipes. Good Wipes gets the job done no matter how much del Taco you've had for lunch. Now, Jordan and I have been using a lot of Good Wipes recently because frankly, our house is under construction and we cannot find our toilet paper. But Good Wipes has saved the day. So pretty soon we're going to have new flooring and very clean butts. Good Wipes breaks down easily, so they're not going to leave you calling the plumber. And they're made with no harsh chemicals, parabens or dyes. Good Wipes is giving away free wipes. Want to try a free pack of Good Wipes? Just buy a pack at your local store, then head to goodwipes.com wife, text them your receipt and get reimbursed. Again, that's goodwipes.com wife to get your free wipes. Good wipes. Because butts deserve better.

[C]

This person wants to know. My partner and I have been together for eight years. We have a house and a dog. We have a life together. I work with kids and if it comes up, I say he's my husband. Like if the kids see him, pick me up. Once they asked if I was married and I said no. It was very confusing for them. So my question is, do you think married equals marriage? Or more like where we are husband and wife but not married? Does that make sense? Anyway, love the pod.

[B]

Yeah, I mean, we say we're married all the time because I feel like it is. Here's why I started calling you my wife. Because we work together a lot. And I think it is hard when I am in a professional setting to be like, can I bring my girlfriend? It feels very unprofessional, which is stupid. But I Would have a hard time talking with, like, Apple TV and being like, would it be all right if I brought my girlfriend? It makes me feel like just. It's embarrassing feeling like, can my wife attend? Feels much more like, professional, normal.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

So I feel like that's where it kind of started. And I think it just. Girlfriend did not represent the fact that we, like the type of life we live together. Like, the type of life we live together is very much that of a married couple. And then I think most of the time, people don't ask any questions. But then if someone is like, when did you guys get married? We are like, well, we're not. We're not. We're actually not technically married. Yes.

[C]

But I think it's hard because, like, I was always kind of like, why would you get engaged and then, like, be engaged for a long time and not get married?

[B]

Egg on your face, huh?

[C]

Egg on my face. But it's like, you guys, if you're not married or thinking about getting married, like, you don't realize how much paperwork there is and how much stuff you have to do and how many family members you're supposed to consult and how, like, much time you're supposed to take off work to do the thing, whatever. It's. It's a very cumbersome experience. And there's a myriad of reasons why people don't get married or don't get married maybe as quick as they would have liked. I would have married Kendall the day that I proposed to her. But ultimately, there's a lot of times, like, stuff you have to do to lead up to getting married, especially if, you know, Kendall and I couldn't decide quite what we wanted to do to get married. Kendall was really set on something that was, like, fun and special but not stressful. And we had a really hard time figuring out, like, what that was, what's the balance of that? And some people are trying to save up money for a wedding, so that's why they're not married yet. Like, whatever. The thing is, I also think it's different in this day and age of, like, there's a lot of legal stuff you can do to get these same protections as a married couple, for the most part. Also, like, the tax benefits of being married don't necessarily help everyone. Depending on, like, what your income bracket is, there's a bunch of things. So to me, I don't care what anyone calls anyone else. If someone was like, this is my husband, and I was like, great. Hi. Nice to meet you. I don't Think my follow up question would ever be like, but are you really married?

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

If later it was like, oh, do you guys have a big wedding? And you were like, oh, we actually, like, you know, aren't legally married or we haven't had a wedding yet. I just like, wouldn't think anything about it because it doesn't matter. But you get those people, you know who these people are. They're the same people when, like. So I moved around a lot growing up.

[B]

Oh, I know what you're gonna say.

[C]

Yeah, I know I've probably complained about this on the podcast before, but I think it's worth complaining about again. I think it's worth complaining about ad nauseam. I moved around a lot growing up for a bunch of different reasons. My parents work to take care of relatives. We had a family band that went on tour. A bunch of different reasons. But I'm originally from the New Orleans area. My family's from that area that's always felt the most like home to me. Yeah, historically, like growing up, obviously. Now LA feels like home because we live here and I'm an adult. But New Orleans has always felt very home. Like, to me, that's where most of my family lives, in that general area, like, whatever. Moved to South Florida to tend to a sick relative when I was like 7 or 8.

[B]

And I would say still very much kept the New Orleans culture a lot. Like, I feel like your family is like, we're from New Orleans. So, like, even though we're in Florida, like, we're celebr. We're going back all the time and we're celebrating Mardi Gras.

[C]

We go back like every other month. We cooked the food in our home. Whatever. Didn't have really any connection to South Florida. I lived in D.C. briefly when I was little. In high school, I moved to Los Angeles for college. I moved to New York. So sometimes I'm talking to someone and they're like, oh, I'm from South Florida. I'll be like, oh, my gosh, I grew up in South Florida. What part are you from? And then there's always someone. I will think I am in a room alone and there is someone behind me. I thought you were from New Orleans. Okay, great. You thought, who cares what you think? But also like, leave me alone. And then I have to go, well, I'm originally from New Orleans, but then I grew up in South Florida. Whatever. It's like, why do I have to explain that to you? You think I'm lying? You think I'm like, trying to Pull the wool over your eyes. You don't matter to me. Like, I'm not trying to trick you because you are insignificant. I hate it so, so, so, so much.

[B]

Well, and it is complicated because even with, like. So I always say that I'm from California because I. I connect. I would say the most. California because I grew. I. I mean, I moved to California when I was five. I don't remember really much before that. I have some memories from before that, a lot of which I think are from watching home videos. Yeah, I don't remember a ton of it. So I always say that. And people like, well, but you're also from North Carolina. Now, I do feel. But it is complicated because it's like, I don't even remember a ton of my time in North Carolina. But when your family is from a place, all of them. Like, my family was very much a Southern family. Even if you're living in California, you have a Southern home, you know?

[C]

Yes.

[B]

It's like, I was the only. I remember my first day of first grade, they were like, what's your favorite food? And I said, my favorite food was grits. And all the kids thought that I had said Ritz crackers because they, like, didn't know what grits were. And it's like, that was what I ate for breakfast. I loved grits. I loved Cream of Wheat. We would have fried chicken. We would. Okay, everyone has fried chicken. I don't know.

[C]

No, but not everybody has fried chicken.

[B]

I don't know. I thought, like, fried okra.

[C]

Fried chicken. Yeah. Every day I took boiled peanuts to school. As a snack.

[B]

Yes.

[C]

As a child.

[B]

Yeah. It was like, what we ate at home was Southern. And eventually it got a little more California, you know, My mom really fell in love with California, so we started having some more cuisine, but we had Southern food. When I would go see my family, it was Southern family. Our, you know, the songs we listened, everything was like, Southern, even though we were in California. So I do have a huge connection to North Carolina, even though I. I would not consider myself raised there, really, in any capacity.

[C]

But I don't even think you have to have a huge connection. If I met someone that was like. I lived in Fort Lauderdale, Florida, for three months. I personally would be like, oh, my gosh, that's so cool. I lived there when I was younger. Did you go to this restaurant?

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Did you have this experience? I just like to connect with people that wouldn't. I wouldn't be like, well, you only live there for three months. Like, shut up. It's so annoying to me. You know who else is pissing me off lately, and this is completely off topic.

[B]

Who?

[C]

White Europeans. The luck you just gave me, I was sick of them. You cannot take one breath, you cannot have one single bite of a sandwich online without a white European in your comments being like, it's so devastating to see America. Shut up. You guys know that, like, we've been to your countries, right? Like, you guys know that we've been to the uk.

[B]

I, like, don't get it. Honestly, Like, I actually do not understand, like, the discussion now. Okay, to be clear, like, I'm not loving America.

[C]

That's not. No, this is not a. This is a pro America statement.

[B]

But I am just like, the way that we're talked about sometimes online, specifically in our food. I feel like the way food is discussed, portions, all of that. I'm like, are you guys, like, delusional? Because, honey, I've been to Europe and I've been given the largest portion I've ever seen in my life. I've been given, like an entire. You know what I mean? Like, you go to the fast food restaurants, it's the same thing. You can get the same stuff.

[C]

When I went to Spain for the first time, I was in Barcelona. Barcelona. And the couple next to me shared a huge salad that had tuna on top of it. Then they each had a steak. And over the course of the meal, they had three bottles of wine. This was two people. I had one thing of paella with two other people and then asked if I could have a to go box. And they were like, you're disgusting. I was like, okay, fine. That's fine. That's not like, part of your culture. Okay, whatever. I don't care. But recently I got a comment because you guys know I do a lot of food content online in addition to comedy content. And someone recently was talking about how it was like I was sharing what I ate today. So normal. So it was like, I cooked breakfast. I had craft services for lunch on set of something. But it was like, once again, breakfast was like a bean and cheese burrito. Lunch was like, I don't know, maybe like Indian food or something. And then for dinner, I got vegetable sushi. And they were like, to eat out this much, to have this much gluttony, to have this much consumption. I was like, what? And then their next comment was like, at best, I would stop a couple times a week at a machine to get a. A croak in, whatever. And then I looked. This person was from the Netherlands. And I'm like, what you're referring to are fried balls of mashed potatoes, sometimes stuff with meat. You're mad that I'm eating vegetarian sushi and Indian food. What are you talking about? It's just like, you can't do anything. And they're always just like, oh, well, da, da, da, whatever. I'm like, please, right?

[B]

I mean, I'm with you 100%. I'm like, there's so many. I know, I know. I mean, yeah, it's truly. It's truly wild. And I just feel like it is. It's so not that different. When you come from America to any other country, you're like, the food feels very similar. Well, except that when we were in Copenhagen, which we had a wonderful time.

[C]

Ate a lot of great food.

[B]

We had a lot of great food. I will say I did feel nauseous. Now I was also jet lagged. But by that, our last day in Copenhagen, I was not doing too well. We landed in Germany. We sprinted to. What was it called? Some of the best food I've ever had.

[C]

It was a Sichuan Chinese restaurant in Berlin. I will share the name of it. If you're going to Berlin, let me know. But it was unbelievable. It was rejuvenating. It was perfect.

[B]

And it. It was medicine. Like, we were fine then. And I was like, yeah. Because I have had open face tuna sandwiches for maybe the last four meals.

[C]

Just a little piece of bread, open mayonnaise, herring.

[B]

I can't.

[C]

Some dill.

[B]

I absolutely. The dill. The amount of dillness.

[C]

I love dill. It was delicious. But I'm like, off. We went to an Indian restaurant recently that is family owned. The people who own it are so great. It's called Roots Indian Bistro. We are obsessed with it.

[B]

I would say the. One of the best meals I've had in the last five years.

[C]

Delicious. But they have obviously a lot of classics. But then they also do some fun stuff. Like they do a chana chalupa, which is like a chickpea curry in kind of like a puffy chalupa shell. So fun, right? So they're doing like classics, but they're also doing like, you know, bar food, takes on some of the classics. Like, really fun. Like, so fun. And I posted a video being like, we loved this place. We had such a great experience and someone had the audacity to comment the Americanization of food. Shut up. What do you think you're doing? Like, what kind of serve do you think you're trying to owned Immigrant owned restaurant. You're like mad at them because they're trying to have fun. Fun. Like leave them alone.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. Well, we talk about it a lot with the soda. Because whenever we go to London.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

It's like, what?

[C]

It's not even.

[B]

You're getting emotional, you're getting worked up.

[C]

Okay. So certain parts, I think it's maybe like the UK at large, but I could be wrong, so don't quote me on that. But certain parts of Europe, I know this actually ended up being like a thing where Jamie Oliver, who's a chef, used to have this campaign to try to get children to have less sugar. And it was a big push against soda. And then what ended up happening is that they took sugar out of a lot of their soft drinks, all their soft drinks, because they. Because a sugar tax.

[B]

So now it's like they're. The more sugar in stuff, the more texture, which I, you know, you know is like, great. Oh, what a great idea. Now people are gonna have less sugar, but of course, nobody cares. They get around it and they just add fake sugar into everything and are like, we don't have as much sugar as Americans. And we're like, no, you have way more. We have real sugar. And trust me, I'm not proud of our food industry, but we have so much sugar in our food. And you guys just have fake sugar.

[C]

It's like allulose in your Coke. I'm like, I'm sor story. Coke isn't a health food. Like, why you think you're better than me? Because we have, we have corn syrup.

[B]

But so now everyone's having. Basically their regular Coke is like Diet Coke.

[C]

They're right. So you go to the uk, their regular Coke tastes like Diet Coke. It's awful. It's awful. So if you're going to the uk, if you're not watching tears, covered in tears, I would Recommend Putting a Dr. Pepper and you're checked back.

[B]

But I'm being serious because last time we went to London, I, I think that the most jet lagged I get is when we go to London because it's just like the weirdest time difference. You know what I mean?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And because like when we went to Japan, it was like. No, it was, it was totally fine.

[C]

Because you like it so quick.

[B]

Well, because it's just such a big time difference that you're like, it's fine. But when I, when we go to London, it's like, I cannot sleep until 6am it's like really bad. Jordan could not get A soda. When Jordan's nauseous, they need their little sodi. Mommy couldn't get one. And it really, like, affected our trip. So I do think next time we go to London, I will be like, we need to get, like, three Dr. Pepper.

[C]

And, sorry, I want to soda on vacation. Yeah, sorry if that makes me a criminal. I want a soda on vacation to.

[B]

Get my baby a soda. I was furious.

[C]

So all this to say, back off. This is such a roundabout way to answer your question. What was the question? They're not married, but sometimes she'll be like, my husband. Great. Who cares? And our answer to that? Some Dr. Peppers. And don't let some white person in Europe tell you what is and is not good. And I know that's exactly what you were asking. No, I'm just like. I think all of this kind of, like, leads to just being like, people have unnecessary opinions sometimes.

[B]

I love you connecting these.

[C]

No. And I'm bringing it full circle because I think it's true. Right. What is the underlying thing of all of this? All of these people, unsolicited, unnecessary opinions? And I'm like, that is just your personal preference. That is just your bias. That is just like, whatever. If someone's not asking you for your opinion, you might not need to give it. So think about that. You might need to, but you might not need to.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

So think about it. But if you and your partner want to call each other husband and wife.

[B]

And so that's like, question.

[C]

You're not really married. You're not really from New Orleans. Oh. Americans are. So. No. No. Whatever. It doesn't matter. That person is just a gnat in your ear. Right. Like, swat them away. That person's a loser who doesn't have enough thoughts about their own life in their brain to live off of, so they have to come up with little thoughts about your life because it doesn't matter. Why should I care? Even if I thought it was, even if I fully disagreed with it, which I don't. But if I did, you're not hurting anybody.

[B]

Right? Right.

[C]

So what does it matter?

[B]

Yeah. Right. 100.

[C]

I understand the children at your school being confused by it, though. Just stop telling them stuff.

[B]

Well, I would just be like, if they were like, are you guys married? I'd be like, yeah, I just lie.

[C]

It's like, who cares what they feel? Yeah. Did you have a wedding? Yep. Huge one.

[B]

Huge, huge wedding.

[C]

And then you show them pictures of Princess Diana's wedding like it doesn't matter. Right. Like, those kids don't matter. They're. They're just, you know. But I'm sure there are people in your life that you probably interact with that act that same way. And for me, it's like, who cares?

[B]

I'm sure there are people. I am sure there. I mean, obviously in the Internet, but I'm sure there's people in our lives who've privately been like, yeah, well, Jordan Kendall say they're married, but they're, like, not married. Which is like, okay, you're not married. Like, I'm sure people have said.

[C]

Right.

[B]

Who cares?

[C]

Yeah. I don't care. It doesn't matter.

[B]

I literally don't care.

[C]

It doesn't matter at all. It doesn't matter at all. We're getting turned on. No.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

I just think you got to do what's best for you. A marriage, to me.

[B]

Oh.

[C]

Is more about a partnership than a legal document. And especially at this time when there seems to be so much concern in our country about gay people getting married. For example, if all of a sudden gay people couldn't get married, would that mean that, like, gay mar. Gay people who are married, their relationship is illegitimate, they should no longer call each other husband and husband or husband wife?

[B]

No. It's like, it doesn't need to change our podcast title.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Happy friends, happy help. Or in prison. Yeah. So it's just like, just do what you want. If you're not hurting anyone, it doesn't matter. Call your partner. Whatever makes you happy. Label your sexuality, however makes you happy. And if people are upset with you about that, they will get over it or they will forget. It's so easy to internalize those things of being like, that person invalidated me. And it can make you really feel bad. But that person has probably already forgot that they invalidated you because they didn't actually really care about it.

[B]

100.

[C]

That's what I think.

[B]

One more thing about traveling to Europe, too.

[C]

Say it.

[B]

It's just like, in a country like America, where there are so many things that are wrong. Why you guys think you're so cool to not put ice in your drinks Boggles my mind.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Do you know what I mean? Because I feel like I hear that all the time. Where people will be like, oh, Americans. Like in France. Americans, we drink water.

[C]

It's not even. They're just upset that we drink water.

[B]

What do they drink?

[C]

Wine? No. I don't know. French people have, like, one bottle of water a day. And then they're also like, that's because our water has more minerals. In it. Okay, I'm thirsty. I don't know what to tell you. Like, why are you so upset that I'm thirsty?

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Asian countries don't put ice in their water a lot of times. Which, actually, you know what? I'm gonna have to push back against that a little bit, because you said it, Jordan. I'm not. Perspective. Nobody will say that. Podcast with yourself. Just fighting with yourself. Well, they're like, oh, you can't get ice in your water in Asian countries unless you, like, really ask for it. And a lot of times they'll still be like, no, we don't have that. But it's all culturally different. You know what I mean? It's all. Yeah, but it's the attitude.

[B]

If you give me ice with no water, that's fine. No, if you give me water with the ice, that's fine. But if I then ask for it and you're like, classic American. I'm like, you don't want me to start saying class things about French people.

[C]

Honey, don't get me started.

[B]

Don't get me started.

[C]

And head over to the Patreon to find out all the bad things we have to say about French people. Just kidding. I like Europe. We've been here a bunch of times. I like Europe, but I'm just like, relax. Everybody needs to relax. Everybody's got problems. You know, I think Canadians used to be like this a little bit. I think they've calmed down a little bit because they've had some issues in the last few years.

[B]

Well, here's why.

[C]

Canadians used to love to be like Americans. And I'm like, well, but here's why.

[B]

Frustrating, because it feels mean. Because ultimately, I feel like Europe's whole opinion of Americans is like. Like, how dumb they are. And all Americans are being like, please.

[C]

Can we have a better education, free school?

[B]

And it's like, yeah, we don't speak nine languages. We don't even really speak English. Yeah, we can't. We don't have school that gives us any money. Please help. It just feels mean.

[C]

Absolutely. They need to be dunking on the American government more. Less on the American people. Kendall's right. I agree with it. 100. Wow. Well, thank you for coming to this kind of cultural meeting of the mind.

[B]

Culture meeting. Financial advice and financial advice, really.

[C]

And lastly, not least, a relationship podcast. We independently produce and make this podcast all by ourselves. And anything you do to support us is really helpful. You can find us on TikTok, Instagram, YouTube, anywhere you get your podcasts. Patreon we have a really fun Patreon.

[B]

Our Patreon is really fun. And let's just say we have some really fun things coming up this fall.

[C]

It's really, really fun. Can I say what they are?

[B]

Yeah. What can we say? I didn't know. I can never remember what I'm allowed to say.

[C]

I've already started. By the time this episode comes out.

[B]

I think probably we're doing a book.

[C]

Club every month of fall. We're doing a book club every month of the year.

[B]

Not every month of fall.

[C]

Oh, we're doing it forever.

[B]

Oh, you said every month of fall.

[C]

Yeah. Oh, like September, October, November.

[B]

That's so funny. When you said fall, I was like, fall is just October.

[C]

We don't know how long we're going to do it. We're going to see how it goes. But for September, October, November, for sure. We're doing a book club. So you can join. You can either be a Jordan or a Kendall or both. Kendall's books tend to be more Sapphic, steamy romance. Mine are typically either nonfiction or. And a little spooky, scary, which really super fun for.

[B]

For fall.

[C]

Super fun for fall. So every month we'll be reading each a separate book. There will be a group chat for your specific book club. You can join both, one or the other, whatever. And I think it'll be really fun. On top of, you get free additional. I guess they're not free because you do pay for them. You get additional Patreon episodes every single week.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

You get ad free episodes in certain tiers. We do giveaways. We live chats. We do all kinds of stuff. And now we are also on cameo, so you can check us out there.

[B]

Yeah. And if you're like, what's the difference between, like, your episodes on Patreon versus your episodes here? We're just much. I. I would say we're a little bit more personal. More personal, like, and you're getting some of the, you know, insider info. We definitely. We say this all the time, but they just kind of feel more like FaceTimes.

[C]

Yeah. They're also more customized because we have a live chat where you can talk to us at any point in time. So we'll have people just write in and then kind of like immediately answer their questions within that.

[B]

Thank you so much for listening. And, Jordan, thank you so much for being my wife. And I'll say it, and I don't.

[C]

Care for being my wife.

[B]

And in protest, after this recording, I'm gonna go get you a Dr. Pepper filled with sugar, honey.

[C]

Hell yeah, USA. Bye.

[B]

This episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. You chose to hit play on this podcast today. Smart Choice. Make another smart choice with Auto Quote Explorer to compare rates from multiple car insurance companies all at once. Try [e-mail] Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates not available in all states or situations. Prices vary based on how you buy.