98: Are You a SHANE Or an ILYA?

Summary

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Happy Wife Happy Life – Episode 98: Are You a SHANE Or an ILYA?

Hosts: Kendahl Landreth & Jordan Myrick
Date: February 16, 2026

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Episode Overview

In this lively, hungover installment, Kendahl and Jordan explore the fascinating world of famous fictional couples, asking: “Are you more of a Shane or an Ilya?”—a nod to the leads from the queer hockey romance “Heated Rivalry.” Through playful banter (much of it fueled by both hosts’ post-party haze), they debate which iconic TV and movie duos they most resemble, relate to the urge for escapist identification with characters, and muse on the dynamics of their own relationship. The listener is taken on a comedic (but earnest) journey through queer pop culture, relationship tropes, and honest introspection into what it means to see yourself—and your partnership—in fictional couples.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Great Injury Debate

• Kendahl and Her Not-Broken-Ankle
  • The episode opens with Kendahl lamenting her “broken” (not really broken) ankle, drawing out how partners respond differently to injury and pain.
    • Kendahl shares her frustration about people accusing her of being dramatic:

      “People never believe me because they think I'm being dramatic. ... Actually, people never believe me because they think I'm being dramatic. I'm not being dramatic.” (01:09)

    • Jordan attempts to be supportive but also teases Kendahl for her reaction and “cartoonish” pain noises:

      “You do a Homer Simpson noise when you hurt yourself, and you know that. ... That's not fair to hold that against me. It's very funny, and I'm not made of steel.” (08:10)

  • This exchanges blends real relationship dynamics—seeking validation, teasing, comfort, and how to be supportive while still being honest.

2. Hungover Reflections & Relationship Honesty

• Both hosts reflect on a rare night out, the aftermath, and their mutual realization that they are “losers” (homebodies) as labeled by their friends. They discuss what it means to be “seen,” comforted, and believed in a relationship.

  “No, I just want you to know that even whether or not your leg is broken, I believe that it hurts.” — Jordan (10:35)

• The segment is filled with vulnerability and humor about their personalities and intuitive homebody status.

3. The "Heated Rivalry" Obsession & Identity Wish-Fulfillment

• Jordan shares how queer media (e.g., “Heated Rivalry”) sometimes hits so hard it leaves them feeling “sick to my stomach”—a combination of longing and resonance.
  • On media that changes your mood:

    “It’s like when you hear about people doing ecstasy and then the come down, so depressed because it changed your brain chemistry. That's what that movie felt like to me.” — Jordan (19:35)

• This launches a broader conversation about identifying with media characters to the point of existential melancholy, especially among queer fans hungry for representation.

4. Are You a Shane or an Ilya? (and Other Couple Archetypes)

• The two try to analyze their relationship through the lens of pop culture couples, not just from “Heated Rivalry” but a slew of iconic duos.
• Role Reversal Nuance:
  • Outwardly, Kendahl presents as a “golden retriever” (soft, approachable), Jordan as a “black cat” (cool, blunt)—but privately, they feel flipped.

  “Outwardly we present that way, but then I think privately, I'm more Rosanoff [the calm, collected one] and you're more Hollander [the chaotic one].” — Jordan (22:37)

• The discussion moves through “black cat/golden retriever” dynamics, exploring public perceptions vs. private realities in their relationship.

5. Iconic TV & Movie Couples – Who Are You Most Like?

• Ben & Leslie (Parks and Rec):
  • Listeners vote for this pair as most like Kendahl and Jordan. They break down similarities, differences, and the complexity beneath sitcom archetypes.
    • “I think I am more Leslie now, and you’re more Ben.” — Kendahl (26:20)
• Bob & Linda Belcher (Bob’s Burgers):
  • Jordan: “I think I'm Bob and you’re Linda.” (28:02)
• Megan & Graham (But I’m a Cheerleader):
  • Kendahl expresses both adoration and critique for Clea DuVall’s character, noting: “I’m Megan and you’re Graham.” (31:41)
• Kermit & Miss Piggy (The Muppets):
  • Both quickly settle: Kendahl is Kermit, Jordan is Miss Piggy, citing their respective personalities and fashion choices.
    • “You are [a diva]. And I’m obsessed with you.” — Kendahl (38:06)
• Jess & Nick (New Girl):
  • Kendahl identifies with Nick’s bizarre, go-with-the-flow, chaotic energy.
  • Jordan’s reluctance gives way to accepting Jess’s more grounded traits.
• Meredith & Cristina (Grey's Anatomy):
  • Kendahl and Jordan struggle to assign themselves; ultimately, Kendahl sees herself as Cristina and Jordan as Meredith, but they note their relationship doesn’t map perfectly to this (41:30–46:56).
• Waverly & Nicole (Wynonna Earp):
  • Kendahl wistfully wishes she could be as cool as Nicole Haught, but admits: “I’m Waverly, clearly.” — Kendahl (52:39)
  • Jordan, the loyal protector, is definitely “Nicole Haught.”
  • On why queer romances matter:

    “As a gay person, I have watched so many movies and shows and where it is just so sad. ... That's what I love about romance books. You can't. It literally can't qualify. Un. There's a happy ending.” — Kendahl (50:47–50:52)

6. Friendship at the Center of Queer Partnership

• The hosts observe that their relationship is as much best friends as romantic partners—a balance they say is distinctively queer.

  “I think straight people totally have it, but I think like, you’re my wife and you’re the love of my life, but you’re also like one of my girlies. ... I yap with you the same way that I yap with [my best friend].” — Kendahl (61:26)

7. The Fictional Couple That Fits Them Best

• With some debate, they settle on Monica and Chandler (Friends) as the closest match.

  “I think we're a lot like Monica and Chandler. ... That’s what a sitcom character is. ... she’s neurotic, he’s obsessed with her and is goofy and jokes all the time, and is like obsessed with her and is like stable for her.” — Kendahl (55:21)

• Friendship, mutual ribbing, and strong affection define their dynamic.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “I have to have feelings, and I have to express them, and it’s very funny.”
  — Jordan (08:10)
  On laughing at Kendahl’s cartoonish pain noises.

• “Sometimes something just hits you. And it hit me so hard I, like, almost came out as non binary because I was like, they look so awesome.”
  — Kendahl (16:08)
  On queer media representation sparking identity exploration.

• “Some people are not as funny as us. So I think sometimes you’re like, this isn’t realistic. And I’m like, I think sometimes, like, people are more serious in relationships than we are.”
  — Kendahl (60:15)
  Tongue-in-cheek, reflecting on their unique relationship style.

• “You’re my wife and you’re the love of my life, but you’re also like one of my girlies.”
  — Kendahl (61:26)

• (On “Wynonna Earp”) “It’s like lesbian history—sometimes you just throw something a bone. And I think ‘Wynonna Earp’ is one of those things you say, ‘Thank you for your service. I’ll give you a watch.’”
  — Kendahl (54:48)

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Timestamps for Notable Segments

• Pain & Injury Validation: 01:00–10:41
• Escapism & Character Identification: 15:42–21:47
• Heated Rivalry/Pop Culture Couples Theme Intro: 21:53–25:57
• Black Cat/Golden Retriever Dynamic: 23:00–25:57
• Parks & Rec, Monica/Chandler, and other TV Couples Breakdown: 26:12–56:29
• Romance Novels & The Need for Queer Happy Endings: 50:06–51:34
• Friendship at the Heart of Their Relationship: 60:15–61:47
• Final Couple/Nostalgia Debates: 55:04–62:14

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Tone & Takeaway

The episode is vibrant and deeply personal—reflective of two best friends (and spouses) delighting in pop culture, gently ribbing each other, and revealing how fictional couples mirror or contrast their own reality. Amid the laughs, there are moments of genuine nuance about queerness, escapism, and the reassuring power of seeing yourself—messy, devoted, or dramatic—in the countless pairs that populate TV and movies.

Bottom line:
Whether you’re a Shane, an Ilya, a Miss Piggy, or a Kermit, what matters isn’t mapping perfectly onto a fictional couple, but finding joy, mirth, and solidarity in the messy, loving dynamics you share with your real-life partner.

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Transcript

[A]

A mochi moment from Sadie, who writes, I'm not crying. You're crying. This is what I said during my first appointment with my physician at Mochi because I didn't have to convince him I needed a GLP one. He understood, and I felt supported, not judged. I came for the weight loss and stayed for the empathy. Thanks, Sadie. I'm Mayra Ameth, founder of Mochi Health. To find your mochi moment, visit joinmochi.com.

[B]

Sadie is emoji member compensated for her story.

[A]

Welcome to happy Wife, Happy Life.

[B]

We're your hosts. I'm Kendall Landriff.

[A]

And I'm Jordan Myron.

[B]

We are two incredibly unqualified, deeply in love comedians.

[A]

We're here to help you with all things relationships. And on today's episode, we're talking famous couple characters.

[B]

I love in this position, I can touch you. I didn't even think about that.

[A]

Well, if you can't tell, we're hungover.

[B]

And my ankle's broken.

[A]

Her ankle's not broken.

[B]

Kendall nearly sprained. This is what I'm gonna tell you.

[A]

Guys for those listening at home, Kendall has her foot elevated on a chair. She's wearing big, bright socks. She's being very dramatic about it.

[B]

Okay, enough. I'm not being dramatic about it. You know, I'll start crying if you say that, because I literally hate when people say I'm being dramatic. I'm not. I have been told so many times I'm being dramatic. And then the doctor, it's like, actually, she has a broken arm. Actually, people never believe me. That happened. That's a lot. But I'm just saying other things, like, people never believe me because they think I'm being dramatic. I'm not being dramatic. My ankle's not broken. But we went out the other night. Can I tell you guys the one.

[A]

Time we never go out, and can.

[B]

I tell you, it was actually embarrassing. It made me really question a lot of things because we went out and we were kind of, like, ready to party. Like, honestly, we're never like that. How many people came up to me, friends being like, I'm so happy you guys are out, just, like, having fun. Oh, it's so good to see you letting loose a little bit. I was like, do people think we are losers?

[A]

I think we're lose all the time.

[B]

We're clearly not. Every person was like, can you believe Kendall and Jordan came out? They never leave their house. Then the next day, well, and I'll get to this later. But I then I thought I broke my ankle. The next day, our wonder friend, wonderful friend Kelsey's driving us about to urgent cares. She goes, I just don't want you guys to think that because Kendall broke her ankle, you guys aren't going to come out again. I was like, we are losers, Jordan. Everyone thinks we're losers.

[A]

That's fine. Because I can't feel like this again. This was days ago and I'm still hungover. I feel awful. I feel like I got hit by a bus.

[B]

You drank more than I did.

[A]

Yes, I did.

[B]

And I. Because I'm not. I still feel a little hungover. But once again, it's days later. It was also one of those things. So after we leave, we're walking to get our Uber. But I think we walked to, like, our car and waited at our car to get the Uber.

[A]

Yeah. Because we were not. This was a thing that we were supposed to go to for two hours. So we showed up and then we drove there. And then I was like, great, we'll be here for two hours. I'm not going to drink at all because I don't normally really drink. And then we will just leave. And then smack, smash cut to nine hours later. We're still there at this, like, all day party thing. I'm drunker than I've been since.

[B]

I've never seen you this drunk. I've never.

[A]

High school. I'm like, oh, my.

[B]

Jordan's been shocked. I've never. I.

[A]

We actually can't talk about it.

[B]

Sorry. Are you gonna get sick? Nauseous. But my point is. So we go, we wait in our car for our Uber while we're walking there. Sorry.

[A]

Just to finish that thought. So it made sense. I realized I didn't finish it. We were walking back to our car so I could make sure it was in place. Because even drunk, I'm responsible. I made sure it wasn't in a place where it would get towed.

[B]

Towed.

[A]

Okay. So we walked back to our car, checked the parking signs, called an Uber.

[B]

Yeah. You have to understand, I mean, this is so out of Jordan and I's comfort zone. We've never done anything like this. It was so funny.

[A]

I don't even take Ubers.

[B]

It wasn't even that. I know. It wasn't even like that crazy to Jordan and I. It felt like Rumspringer. Like, I'm not even kidding. Like, we were like, we're being insane. All our friends were being like, you're really not being insane. We're like, no, we're. We're on one right now. Everyone's like, you're really not. We're walking back to the car, I fall and I twist my ankle. It hurts so bad. It was one of those things. I was just saying this to John out there. I was like, you know when you're drunk and you do something that makes you seem so drunk, but you're like, that wasn't because I was drunk. And it's so embarrassing. Like when you're drunk and then you like spill your drink.

[A]

Oh, this is like when I got food poisoning. I guess I wasn't drunk during this, but it's a similar vibe of I got food poisoning one time at a music festival from eating a salad that had been in a backpack during the day. And then I got onto bart, which is the San Francisco subway. Oh.

[B]

And everyone was like, she's blackout.

[A]

Started throwing up. And I was like, throwing up in my friend's backpack and then looking up and being like, I am not drunk, I am sick. Because for some reason I, like, didn't want people to think that I was drunk. I'm like, no one cares.

[B]

Embarrassing. But I get what you're saying. Like, that's like, I remember. And that's why, because I feel like it's happened to me and it's also happened to people I'm with where like, we've had a couple glasses of wine and then someone spills their drink and they're immediately like, I'm sorry, I'm not drunk. Like that. But it feels so embarrassing. And it felt the same thing. This felt like the same thing. I don't know. Listen, I was a level of drunk. It did not help that. It did not help me. And I don't. I can't speak to if I would have fallen or not if I hadn't been drunk. But it was on one of those LA streets where it's like, literally, there's clearly been an earthquake there 20 years ago, and it's just gotten worse and worse. And a tree root has grown underneath the sidewalk and there's like a five foot drop off between. It's insane. I did fall there. I could have completely fallen fully sober. It hurts so bad. I also was drunk, so the pain was very bad. And that scared me because I was like, it's bad now and I'm very drunk. But then in the middle of the night, oops, the middle of the night, I get up and I literally could not walk. That's what scared me. It's like, it's not like, oh, because now. But now I'm sorry. Because. No. No apologies yet. Because I'm in the middle of my sentence, so stop already arguing with me.

[A]

Whoa.

[B]

I. Now it's like it hurts, but I can walk on it. That night and that next day, I could not walk on it. Could not. Like, my body would not allow me to. Now you can go ahead.

[A]

Thank you. You walked after you fell, and you walked. You were walking some, and this is.

[B]

Just the thing, but that's what I was saying. I was drunk. And that's why I was saying then when I got up in the middle of the night.

[A]

But you were still probably drunk in the middle of the night. And also, like, you were still, like, whenever something. Whenever you get hurt or you're sick for some reason, I feel like. You only feel like it is validated if it's the worst case scenario of the thing. So it's like the second Kendall fell down, she was like, my leg is broken. And I was like, no, it's not. It's literally not. I looked at it. There's. And. And there's no swelling, no bruising, whatever. It has, like, a little swelling now, but it's obvious you just, like, twisted your ankle or sprained your ankle or something, which is, like, painful. I'm not negating that whatsoever, but I'm trying to be comforting in these scenarios. So Kendall's like, I broke my leg. And I'm like, no, no, you didn't. Don't worry. And she's like, you. What do you know? You're not a doctor.

[B]

Well, because sometimes it makes me feel. You know why? Because it makes me feel like I'm alone. Because I think I'm like, I'm the only one who knows how bad this is. So when you say, like, no, it's not broken, it makes me feel like you don't get how bad it hurts.

[A]

But so I think sometimes I'm like, hurt that aren't.

[B]

I'm not like, if my leg's broken. Yeah, but it's the degree at which it hurts. I need you to be like. You to be like, this is what you can say next time.

[A]

Oh, God.

[B]

Oh, my God. You think it is. You think it's broken. It must hurt so bad.

[A]

Got it.

[B]

Because I don't need anyone to diagnose me. It's also like, what do you think? Everyone's so freaked, and because Jordan's not the only one does this, everyone's like, it's not broken.

[A]

It's not broken.

[B]

It's not broken. What do you think I'm gonna make you do a surgery on it right here? No, but I'm in a lot of pain.

[A]

But everyone's valid. This is the thing. Everyone's validating that you're in pain. They don't have to make up a lie to validate that you're in pain.

[B]

Well, what about my toe? Last year, I broke my toe, and I did break it, and your mom told me it was broken.

[A]

She's a doctor. My mom says it was.

[B]

It was broken. It was. Jordan. It was. And everybody said it wasn't, and it was.

[A]

Kendall stubbed her toe. My mom says it sounds like it could have been broken.

[B]

Sounds like. She said it looked broken. She said it looks broken to me, but what. Just say it's broken. Happy wife, happy life. That's what we're doing here.

[A]

Okay. Your toe broke, and your leg is broken.

[B]

No, I know my foot's not broken, but I think just in the moment, being like you, if you think it's broken, it must hurt really bad.

[A]

But I was. But I'm literally doing that. You're, like, on the ground. I'm, like, trying to pick you up, trying to help you. I'm like, what can I do? I'm so sorry.

[B]

Are you okay?

[A]

Are you okay? And then you're like, it's broken.

[B]

Be honest. You were laug.

[A]

The first thing I did was laugh. No, no, no. The first thing I did was laugh, but I apologized immediately.

[B]

And you always laugh when I hurt myself, because I do that.

[A]

Because you do a Homer Simpson noise when you hurt yourself, and. And you know that. And that's not fair to hold that against me. I always. And I always apologize immediately. I always start laughing and apologize. I say, I'm so sorry. How can I help you? What can I do? Because anytime Kendall hurts us, she goes like this. And it's very funny, and it's very cartoonish, and I'm not made of steel. I'm not a statue. I have to have feelings, and I have to express them, and it's very funny. But when you fell. And also what was funny is when you fell, I tried to catch you, and you pushed me away.

[B]

You know what that's like?

[A]

What?

[B]

Get out.

[A]

If you even try to tell people that story, I will. I swear to God, I'll sue you.

[B]

Okay, we'll move on, you guys.

[A]

That's all you guys know about that story.

[B]

But anyway, that was what it was giving.

[A]

Yeah. For some reason, I tried to catch Kendall, and then she fell. And it's similar to another thing that we can't talk about because it's too embarrassing for me, Kendall. Well, they already heard that part. Listen, we're hungover. We're testy.

[B]

Dude.

[A]

Kendall's leg is broken.

[B]

Thank you, baby. Why?

[A]

This is just the thing. I just want it to be seen as if I'm like, oh, my God, are you okay? That must hurt so bad. Let me help you. I was trying to pick you up and carry you, which I can do.

[B]

This is also a thing. Jordan is convinced. The confidence at which Jordan thinks they can pick me up and haul me around is insane.

[A]

But I can't pick you up.

[B]

We have a house showing the next day, and Jordan says you don't need crutches. I can just carry you.

[A]

But I can pick you up.

[B]

You cannot pick me up and carry me around.

[A]

Yeah. Yes. I've done that before.

[B]

You've picked me up in certain scenarios. Briefly.

[A]

No.

[B]

Wink and don't. But you have never, like, bridal style, picked me up and carried me through a home.

[A]

Yeah, but I could. If I wanted to, I can pick you up or I can put you on my back.

[B]

I have a broken leg. Is not the time to test that out. Unless I want a broken back as well. And I'm worried about hurting you. If you even stretch and you're lifting me. That's a lot.

[A]

The room is spinning.

[B]

What?

[A]

So the room is spinning.

[B]

What does that mean for me?

[A]

I'm hungover. The room is spinning.

[B]

Oh, God. Is it really? Yeah. Is it that bad? Yes, but that feels really not good. Because this.

[A]

Oh, thank you, Kendall. But, Dr. Landreth. Oh, you're hungover. And that sounds really not good.

[B]

No, but this far away from it, you're still dizzy.

[A]

That's my point. Something's wrong with me. That's why I can't drink.

[B]

No more drinking. We're gonna be. We're sober now.

[A]

I never drink.

[B]

Because we don't need it. Honestly, like, actually, like, I. I don't need it to have a good time.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I'm a hoot and a holler.

[A]

I know. That's right.

[B]

We've never been drunk. We do this podcast, and we got the whole world listening.

[A]

Yeah, baby, we do. No, I just want you to know that even whether or not your leg is broken, I believe that it hurts.

[B]

Thank you.

[A]

But you just. But I think you just. I know, but you just have to be realistic, because you'll be like, it's broken. And you're, like, literally standing on it, and I'm like, it's not broken. If you're standing.

[B]

But that's why I don't like too. You're always trying to catch me. Like when I was in the shower. You're like, see, you're standing on your stand. I was like, I'm not. My weight is not on my foot. But when you.

[A]

I remember when I broke my elbow, I could not move my foot without being in excruciating pain.

[B]

When you broke your elbow, you couldn't move your foot without being. Yes.

[A]

Because your whole body.

[B]

But you have to remember, I've broken a bone before.

[A]

Which one?

[B]

I broke my arm in three places. It was so bad. Literally, the cast run is like this. It was broken. Broken.

[A]

I was like, what? You did Normal cast shape.

[B]

No, this is the arm. It was. It was my forearm. My forearm was like this. My mom still has it. She can show it to you.

[A]

I thought you really smells normal cast shapes. Oh, I love the way inside of a cast, especially 30 years old. It's because I broke my arms and stuff so much growing up. And the doctor that would do my cast look like Wayne Brady. He was so handsome. I love it. I just remember, like, getting to be there, and I was so excited because I was getting my cast off and my arm always felt so weird. I think it was probably the closest thing I had to maybe what drugs felt like because, like, your arm is all, like, tingly and weird. It's like you did, like, kava or something.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And I loved my doctor. He was so handsome. And then just the smell. I guess I associate all that with. It's like salt and vinegar chips meets parmesan cheese. But a little dog's funky.

[B]

The thing is, though, is that you're always comparing it to, you shattered your elbow. And this is what I think sometimes you don't understand. You shattered your elbow. When I broke my arm that one time, it wasn't shattered, but it was severely broken. So, yeah, I was, like, in full shock on the ground. But I think sometimes you forget, like, you can break something not so severely. And sometimes I'm like, yeah, I could have broken my ankle, but, like, a small bone in my ankle that is, like, slightly broken. You know what I mean? And I'm like, yeah, if I shattered my entire foot, I don't think I'd be able to walk to the Uber. Okay, you've checked out.

[A]

No, I'm just looking up symptoms for broken leg.

[B]

Oh, my God. A broken leg. I didn't say a broken leg. I said a broken and not angled.

[A]

You said broken leg. A bunch of times.

[B]

Well, I'm joking. I'm joking.

[A]

This is the problem. But this is what I'm getting to. This is what I'm always scared of.

[B]

I don't think I have.

[A]

Hard to tell, Ken.

[B]

You think I thought, I have a broken leg.

[A]

It's so hard to tell Kendall's actual pain tolerance because it is so unclear. Cuz you're. You like to be kind of jokey about it. Like, you like to be like, I'm in the worst pain that anyone's ever been in and I need so much attention, which is fine. But then I'm like, okay, well, should we go to the doctor? And you're like, no, stop. I don't want to go to the doctor. And I'm like, wait, how much pain are you in? And you're like, just like normal pain.

[B]

And that's what I'll say now with the foot. I don't know if I need to go to the doctor because I was generally concerned. And this is. This is what I think it is. This is what irritates me. Not with you, but with. I am silly. I get it. I'm a silly goose. Okay. I get it.

[A]

But millennial coded.

[B]

I am a silly little goose. I. Shiitake mushrooms. I've. Can you say that?

[A]

Oh, my God.

[B]

Did you ever say that?

[A]

No.

[B]

You didn't say that?

[A]

No.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

I wasn't a loser.

[B]

My sister used to say that.

[A]

Sorry, Madison.

[B]

She'd go, that's epic. Shiitake mushrooms. That's epic.

[A]

Epic was not a thing that I remember being that popular where I grew up, even though I'm very much a millennial.

[B]

Yeah, you are.

[A]

Yeah. Epic was not. I feel like, that big of a thing.

[B]

Here's what I'll say. I'm a silly goose. I'm epic. But I'm a silly goose. And I think that for me, I. Sometimes I'm like. But when it comes down to it, I'm a very reasonable adult.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And so I'm like, I am in a lot of pain, and I'm being, whatever, but I'm not going to make us go to the ER at 3am Because I think I have a. Even if it was broken, because I have a broken ankle, I'm like, it. It. Everything's fine. I feel fine. I. So I think at the time, I was being a very reasonable amount of stress where I was like, this is. This is why I think we should go to urgent care in the morning. I cannot walk on it. It is swelling a little. I don't think my huge ankle bone. I don't know even the names of bones, but is broken. But I think some part of it could be. And my concern is that I have all these work things coming up this week. I can't not be able to walk. So worst case scenario, I need crutches to get me to and from whatever. Now I can walk on it a little bit. So I'm like, there's not really a ton they can do for a sprain. So I'm like, I. I elevate and I can limp around. It's not a big deal.

[A]

But this is what. What you're saying is so normal and so reasonable. This is not what you say.

[B]

But I want you to just trust that's inside me. I'm very norma. Normal and reasonable. And so when I.

[A]

But you're like, I'm so scared. I'm so scared. It's broken. It's broken. What am I gonna do? And I'm like, it's not broken. And then you're like, don't say broken.

[B]

What do you know? Whatever. I'm a baby.

[A]

It's so confusing.

[B]

Okay, what are we talking about today?

[A]

Today we're talking about couples.

[B]

Oh, I picked up characters.

[A]

So these are. Yeah, this is Kendall's idea. We're. We had people write in. All of you write in famous couple characters, duos that you like.

[B]

And what made us start talking about this heated rivalry? Because we were like, who are we in heated rivalry, you guys? It's actually so funny. He did. Rivalry is the exact type of thing I would like. I do like it. It's awesome. This is not the type of thing Jordan enjoys. Jordan's addict.

[A]

I feel sick to my stomach about it.

[B]

Jordan loves heated.

[A]

I feel sick to my number one stomach about it. I don't know what. I don't know what it is.

[B]

Just hit you just right.

[A]

It just hit me just right. I think it's a combination of, like, gender stuff and queerness, and just, like, it just hit me just right. And I'm obsessed with it. I can't stop thinking about it.

[B]

Unfortunately, sometimes something hits you. I'm telling you, when I saw Liv Houston in season two of Yellowjackets, I.

[A]

It.

[B]

Sometimes something just hits you. And it hit me so hard, I, like, almost came out as non binary because I was like, they look so awesome when something. You're just like, I don't know what I want, but I want to be you is what I want.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

And then that, like, I think a lot of people in fandoms relate to this. It can make you really depressed because you're like, I don't. At that time, I was like, I don't think I'll be happy until I am Liv Houston.

[A]

It's also crazy. I'm just like, yo, you. And I will never be like, sexy boy hockey players.

[B]

Speak for yourself. Speak for yourself. I know that's hard. That's like, when you go see. You had this with the Elvis movie. This is.

[A]

This one's really unwell.

[B]

But I think a lot of people, you'll see something I saw, like when I go see a singer in concert, I go, I'll never be that. When I see a Broadway show, I'll never be that.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

And it Sometimes it just hits you just right where you're like. Nothing makes me more sad. I wish my whole life was different so I could go and I could be. I feel this way when I watch ice skaters on the Olympics. I wish I could go back and change everything. I wish I could go back and I could be.

[A]

Do that.

[B]

And I could do that exact thing. I don't know why I love my life.

[A]

Yes, I had that. I feel like the first time I really prominently had that was with that movie that I saw called of an Age. It is either I can remember it's Australian or New Zealand. Hold on. Let me tell you, because I feel like it's disrespectful not to know, but it is a gay coming of age movie from 2022, and it is.

[B]

I refuse to watch coming of age movies. They make me too sad.

[A]

I know. It really is.

[B]

I don't want to watch anyone.

[A]

Where is this movie from? I hate not being able to find something quickly on the Internet. I'm like, but it's international point. It's an international film. I just want to give it the respect, you know, Australian. Perfect. Thank you. It's an Australian coming of age film where, like, a guy ends up spending time with his best friend who's a girl's older brother.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And it's very clear that they're both gay.

[B]

And they know that in the beginning.

[A]

That's one of the big one. It's in the trailer, so it's not a spoiler, but basically it's like the younger guy who's 18, he's about to graduate from high school, and. And he and his best friend do ballroom dancing together. And they have a big ballroom dancing competition, and he can't find her. And finally he gets a call from her. That's Like, I'm on not the fully other side of Australia, but in, like, a totally different place, like four hours away. You have to come get me. And we have to try to, like, make it to this ballroom dancing competition in time. She's like, my brother's in town. Don't tell my mom. My brother will drive you. And so she sends her brother to, like, go pick him up. And they're having fun banter, and it's cute and whatever. And then there's like a box in the back seat. He's like, go grab one of the tapes out of the box in the backseat. And the younger guy's like, going through the boxes, checks one out and puts it in. He was like, oh, these are cool. Like, where'd you get them? The older guy's like, oh, they're my exes. And the younger guy goes, I hope you don't mind, or I hope she won't mind us going through her stuff. And the older guy goes, he won't. And then you're like, oh. So the older guy's like, out and gay. And the younger guy is closeted or doesn't know he's gay or whatever, but.

[B]

He knows now he likes. Yeah.

[A]

So they end up having, like a torrid, like, 48 hour love affair that is so emotionally intense. And I left that movie.

[B]

You were not well after I was.

[A]

Sick to my stomach.

[B]

I was.

[A]

I was more mentally ill than I am normally. I was like, I'm not okay. I went into work the next day. I sat in my boss's office. She was like, you seem more upset than I've ever seen you. What is wrong? And I was like, justine, I'm scared something's happened. I watched this movie and I feel like it's like when you hear about people doing ecstasy.

[B]

No, I know.

[A]

And then the come down, so depressed because it changed your brain chemistry. That's what that movie felt like to me. And I. Then I. I'm having that with heated rivalry a little bit, not as much, but still some. And then with the Elvis movie, it wasn't the same because it wasn't queer. I think queer stuff obviously hits harder with me than others. But with Elvis, I was like, whoa, it's just so crazy that I'll just like, never be a famous male musician.

[B]

Who, like, I know, plays the guitar and, you know, I mean, I have it with. I read, I read. I read a book where one of them was a cursed God and they live on a pirate ship. And I got depressed when it was over. I was like, why am I not that?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And I'll never be that. I'm an idiot. All I do is just stupid stuff. She's over there being a cursed God and on a pirate ship. It's just hard. But I think it's very common, so I think that's.

[A]

Well, it must be. I feel like there must be some kind of psychological terminology around it or, like, what it does or how it. How it encapsulates you, but.

[B]

No, it does, because that. Because it has no rhyme or reason. It's also like, if you're in a bad place for some reason, like, I. I always joke about that, but when my dad died, whatever I was watching at that time, it was like I became obsessed with it. Read fan fiction about it. And it's like. It's actually embarrassing for me to be saying this about Liv Houston, because we're mutual. So actually, this is embarrassing.

[A]

I'm sorry.

[B]

Mutuals. But there's nothing about them that I'm like, I want to be them specifically, but it was just like, I was going through a bad time. Yellow jackets came out. They're so cool. They play obviously a lesbian on the show. And so it just hit me just right. And I was like, I want to be Liv Houston.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So bad. And I'm, like, looking up fan edits, being like, not like I think they're cool. I do. But being like, I wish I was them.

[A]

It's like an eerie thing. It's very.

[B]

It's weird.

[A]

And then add in a layer of like. Because then I'm also having this with the heated rivalry boys, where I'm like, they're both actors in real life. I'm an actor. I'm like, am I doing enough in my acting career? Should I be doing X, Y, Z? Will I ever be on something as beloved as this? And it's like, no, probably not. But for some reason, it really gets you in your feelings.

[B]

Yeah, but it's all. But it's also you. You totally could be. Because also, it's like, beloved by who? It's not like. I mean, it's a huge show, but stuff like that is just so random. You know what I mean? And I think it. But I do think it's just normal. I also think it probably hit you less than that first movie because you've been through it before. Because I feel like the first time I really was obsessed with something. It made me really depressed. I was like, what's going on? Yeah. And then you're like, oh, it's Actually, fine. But we were like, who's who? If you haven't seen Heated Rivalry, go watch it. But there's two men in it.

[A]

Yeah. Hollander and Rosanoff.

[B]

Ilya Rosanoff and Shane Hollander.

[A]

Right.

[B]

And. And what did we decide? I think we. The reason I thought this would be a fun episode is because I don't think it's as cut and dry. I think there's a lot of ways we're like the other one.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But it was just that we were having fun chatting about it, so I was like, I bet there's other couples and TV shows that we could chat about it. Yes.

[A]

And just to answer this, I think that you have a charm that Ilya Rosenoff has that's.

[B]

Actually, I'm so scared because people are. That's so embarrassing, me sitting here like this in my. In my axolotl socks. No, but you have a very similar charm to one of the hottest men that's ever been on television.

[A]

No, but I think. I think you're very naturally charming, like Connor Story, the actor is.

[B]

And I think I'm silly. I think I don't get stressed.

[A]

You're very silly.

[B]

Whatever.

[A]

And I get stressed, and I'm more organized and more planned. So I think outwardly we present that way, but then I think privately, I'm more Rose enough. And you're more Hollander.

[B]

Yeah, I think so.

[A]

And not just in a sex way. Okay, everyone relax.

[B]

Yeah. Privately. In Las Vegas.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

At the cottage. We're very similar.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

I agree with you.

[A]

I think it's also because we were saying this, too. I think it's so interesting. Not that you and I aren't genuine to who we are on the podcast. We are. Or in life. But I also think something that's very strange and very real is I think if. And you can. Well, I was going to, like, you can guess, but it's, like, so obvious what I'm going to say. Why would you guess? I think that you and I present. I've seen people comment this before. Oh, black cat, golden retriever. Black cat, gold retriever. And I think people perceive me as black cat and you as golden retriever. Outwardly.

[B]

Yeah, I think so. I've heard that said.

[A]

Because I think I have a more aggressive energy.

[B]

Dark hair.

[A]

I have dark hair. I'm a little more blunt. I'm better with confrontation. But I think privately, you're much more black cat and I'm more golden retriever.

[B]

Yes. I mean, I. Yeah, I mean, I definitely think that I actually don't. I don't think. I guess I don't think of us as classically that at all.

[A]

No, no, I guess that's true.

[B]

I get what you're saying, because I think that I. You're very much a golden retriever wife guy. Like, I. And I am, too. I mean, we're both, like, normally, yeah.

[A]

We both love each other.

[B]

We love each other, of course. But I think, like, I am much more, like, to myself.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Like, even in our. We. We tell each other everything. We're always talking. But I'm much more likely to just, like, keep it inside and talk through myself. And I, like, forget to tell not just you, but anyone anything what I'm thinking about. Like, I'm not always just saying what I'm thinking, especially when it comes to feelings and stuff. I also think I'm much more obviously introverted. But I also. And you said this when we were talking about it, and I agree. I am. I think I'm harsher.

[A]

Yes. Kendall's like, a much harsher judge things than I am.

[B]

I think you're much more with people. You're like, hey, give everyone the benefit of the doubt. I give people the benefit of the doubt. I'm sometimes, like, I just more don't care. I'm like, well, benefit of the doubt. Why am I. I just don't really care. I'm not going to. If I'm not going to. Like, if I'm not close with someone, I'm like, I don't really feel the need to put any. I don't even know what I'm saying, but you know what I mean? I don't really care enough to give them the benefit of the doubt.

[A]

Yes. I think colder energy than I do.

[B]

I think I have a colder.

[A]

In interpersonal interactions.

[B]

Yes, I'm much more. I'm more quiet.

[A]

You're more reserved.

[B]

Now, granted, this is compared to. We work with fully. Mostly we're hanging out with comedians. So I think, like, my version of reserved is very different. But I also think I've gotten more comfortable as I've gotten older, letting myself not speak when I don't want to talk or feeling like I have to fill the silence. That's something I'm really working on this year is like, I think I've always felt, like, in charge of making a conversation. Good. And I'm like, I don't need to be in charge of that. Someone can ask me a question. I don't need to ask a thousand questions.

[A]

Absolutely.

[B]

So I'm Coming more into my black cat energy, I would say. But I totally agree. I think we present more. I mean, I don't think either of us presents as a black cat, though, because I think we're both so. Well, no, but black cat, gold retriever, the black cat is also obsessed with them. So I don't think it has to do with that, because I think the classic. The classic, like, golden retriever black cat is Chris Pratt on Parks and Rec and April Ludgate. I think that's, like, the most black cat. And she's obsessed with him. Yeah.

[A]

So it's giving, like, goth girlfriend.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

With, like, very, very normal boyfriend and.

[B]

Very, like, I'm upset. I love her so much. I don't think about any. And I think it's also a connotation that it's kind of. They're stupid. Like the golden retriever. It's like, I'm blindly just obsessed with you. I'm obsessed with everything you do. You could do no wrong. Yeah. And so I don't think we're really either of those, but I definitely think I'm more black cat than you are.

[A]

Yes. Well. And it is funny that you brought this up, because the biggest one that we got over and over and over again in this poll was Ben and Leslie from Parks and Rec. Oh.

[B]

I think I am more Leslie now, and you're more Ben.

[A]

Yeah. But to be honest, I don't really remember them that well.

[B]

Leslie's very. You know why? I think that one's actually. That's a really fun one because they're both equally love each other. Equally obsessed. Ben is much more realistic, and I think is very. I haven't watched in years, but I did love it for a long time. He. He's very by the books, but I think Leslie always has these huge ideas. She's always like, what if we did this?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

But I think she also does those things. It's not like she's coming up with random things.

[A]

We should try this.

[B]

She's always like, here's my huge dream. She's a big dreamer, and he is very successful, but is also like, I support whatever she does. And I feel like that's where you and I.

[A]

Yes. And I think that she is. She has high. Higher highs and lower lows, whereas Ben is more like even keel.

[B]

But that feels like more maybe me.

[A]

No.

[B]

You think I have high. Well, you think I have lower lows.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. Maybe you're right.

[A]

Not right now, because I'm too hungover to even be here, but in General.

[B]

You're right. I feel. Yes. I think I'm. I feel like I'm always really even killed until I'm not. Which I maybe is how a lot of people are. But I think you're more like you're dipping, like, less deep. And you're. Right. Less high. But more often I'm always even keel. And then I'm like, boom. You know what I mean? If you're watching or if you're listening. I'm putting my hand to the ground. Or then I'm really.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. And then she's touching heaven. The next one is Bob and Linda Belcher.

[B]

I've never seen. You've never seen Bob's burgers. I know, I know. I know. And everyone always says that. I. Well, especially when I. When I do Aunt Carol, my character. I do. Yeah. People say I sound like Linda.

[A]

Sound like Linda. Yeah.

[B]

But I don't know.

[A]

I think I'm Bob and you're Linda.

[B]

Why?

[A]

You know, Bob is kind of a little more. I think Bob plays into his bit a little more. And his bit is kind of being like, oh, God.

[B]

Excitable. Right.

[A]

And Linda's very excitable. She's very goofy.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That's like. But I think they're both good parents and they love each other very much. I think they're both actually good at, like, handling things when they need to. This is a hard one for me.

[B]

What?

[A]

I can't really decide. Megan and Graham from. But I'm a cheerleader.

[B]

Oh.

[A]

So this is Natasha Leon.

[B]

And I was like, please. I watch it every other day for.

[A]

The people at home.

[B]

You know, I don't think I'm Graham. I always. Now I have to preface by saying, am I in love with Graham? 100Am I in love with Cleo Duvall? 100 the character of Graham always made me eye roll because. But she's supposed to be. It's like, yeah, I'm so alternative. Now. She is going to conversion therapy. So I do feel for her. But she's. I think the way she treats Megan is annoying because I'm like, you obviously see that this cheerleader is being sent to a conversion camp. You being really mean to her and being kind of like, oh, you think you're so popular. Oh, you're just. You're so straight laced. It's like, obviously she has a lot of pressure from her family.

[A]

Let her live. Let her live.

[B]

Now granted, they're supposed to be in high school, which is hard to remember because they looks 30 years old.

[A]

So many. All of them look so old.

[B]

Like Melanie Lynskey. I always do that. No, I was right. Melanie Lynskey, what did you think you were doing? One time I was pitching a pilot that I was writing, and I had, like, used. I was trying to use Melanie Linsky as, like, a fan casting. Here's the type she'd be. And I kept saying, Monica Lewinsky. And the person that I was explaining it to was so sweet, but kept being like, so I'm not really understanding, though. Like, what do you mean, a mom?

[A]

And what's Monica gonna do?

[B]

And I was like, you know, like. Like, kind of, like, quirky. And they were like, what?

[A]

It's so funny because you said Melanie Linsky. And then one side of your face twitched. And then you were like, that was wrong. And I was like.

[B]

Because I immediately was like. I said Monica Lewinsky again. Anyways. But I. They're all. Do not look like they're in high school. Well, I guess Natasha kind of looked like she was.

[A]

But no, they all look older. I think the youngest looking one in the movies, RuPaul, and he's the coach.

[B]

I know. Well. But I think that I am nothing like Graham in that movie because I think she is kind of a masochist. Right? Masochist.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Does that mean, like, you, like, bad things Now? Granted, I feel bad because she has a lot of reason to be. She's in a bad situation. But I think she's really kind of like. I guess I'm just like, you're all in conversion therapy, so, like, why are you hating on other body friends? Being like, she's being so. Or like she's pushing against this. Or she's, like, not gay enough for me. I'm like, okay, like, cut some people some slack. Also, like, Meghan just got here. She literally just got.

[A]

Give her a second. Let her breathe.

[B]

Yeah, she's still in a cheerleading outfit. Like, please. So I think I'm nothing like her because I think she's very negative and kind of. But I don't think you're like that either. I just think of the two. I think our dynamic is more like that. Like your gram and I'm Megan.

[A]

Yeah. I think I am generally a little more alternative than you.

[B]

But I also think, even true to the story, like, I think in the beginning, Megan feels so, like, she has to be this. Like, I'm a cheerleader, and I'm so happy and I'm positive. And I think over the course of the movie, she kind of, like, chills out. I Think that's very me. Like, I think I feel this pressure to be like, I'm happy and everything's great. And I like, that's a huge part of my personality. That as I've gotten older, I start to be like, okay, I don't really want to be like that all the time and, you know, playing more true to how I feel. So I think, yeah, I'm Megan and you're Graham.

[A]

That makes sense to me.

[B]

The one thing can I tell you I hate about that movie, Please. Why is CLE Duvall's hair so greasy? Why?

[A]

Because that's part of the aesthetic. That is horrible. No, it's part of the aesthetic Time.

[B]

It's a. It is an inch from ruining the movie for me. I love that movie, Kendall. I remember when I saw that movie. I similarly, I was depressed when it was over. I remember crying when it was over. I've never been like. I was like, I want this movie to go on for nine years.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Because, you know, we just don't have a ton of. You're like, oh, I've seen this now, and I can't watch it for the first time again.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I loved it so much, but I kept being like, why is the hair like that? Why is the hair greasy?

[A]

I love it. Unfortunately.

[B]

You think it's hot, though. You love it because it's camp. Or do you think it. If you saw her, you'd be like, I like that her hair looks like.

[A]

That soaking wet in that scenario. Yeah, I would. Sorry, I'm a teenager. She's so all. I get it. You're an adult lady now, looking at it with a wife who has incredibly clean hair. So that's different. So it's nothing to compare it to.

[B]

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[A]

I think people think it might be.

[B]

The other way around. No way. I am literally actually like Kermit and you literally are actually like Miss Piggy. First of all, even just like in outfits.

[A]

Sure.

[B]

Like, I would be nude if I could. If we're doing dressed like Kermit, I would. I don't care about clothes. I literally, I really do think we should be nudists. I. I'm from an area where people are nudists and I. I don't get it. I'm like, this is capitalism. Why are we wearing clothes? We all have the same stuff going on for the most part. And any shame we have around that is put on us. So we'll buy clothes. I'm like, over it. I mean, unless you live like in cold areas. I get It. Or really hot areas. But, like, then just, like, wear an open, like, robe. I don't know. I'm just like. It's just weird.

[A]

I know you're cold, but just wear an open road or just wear it because you're cold.

[B]

But, like, I think then when you go back into your house that's warm, you should just take off all your clothes. I don't. First of all, hygienically, it's not good for my coochie to be so stopped up. Stopped up with underwear. What do I say? Oh, God, it's not good to be so closed off. It's not natural.

[A]

You need lots of air circulation.

[B]

I will say, but I just don't get it. I'm like, what is the shame?

[A]

I just met a nudist who. I forgot to tell you this.

[B]

When.

[A]

The woman that did my wax, was she nude when she was nude? No, she, like, outside of work, she's a nude.

[B]

I love her also, everything you've told me about her, I'm like, we need to hang out with her.

[A]

Well, I. So as you guys famously know, if you've been a fan of the pod for quite some time, you'll know that famously, I went to a European wax center. They waxed me. They were to bunch my skin off. I emailed them, being like, hi, this is what happened. They didn't respond. And they just sent me a refund and then continue to have contact dermatitis for, like, three years.

[B]

I mean, and it was bad.

[A]

It was bad. Kimmel had a rub an ointment on me twice a day. And as much as she loved that.

[B]

I miss it every day.

[A]

Tedious. And so I put it off. So finally I was like, you know what? I'm taking my power back in my own hands. I'm getting wax. I'm getting a wax. And I did it. And she was like, yeah, I'm a nudist. Because we were talking about. I was like, oh, how do you fall into this job of waxing? And she was like, I think you have to be a mix of personable but firm. You are assertive, so it seems like you know what you're doing, but you're also welcoming and you have to be comfortable with nudity.

[B]

Yeah. I really think because I. And I. I really felt this many times. I'm not like, the first time you're naked in front of someone, it is jarring because we're not used to it. But I truly. And I've experienced this with not just like lovers. I'm saying, like, with friends. I've had friends where it's like. I mean, my best friend Nicole and I one time, we. We were not. We were so close. We are so close, but we've never. We'd never been really naked in front of each other. And then we did this movie shoot where we basically. It was kind of like, we both need to shower. Not in the movie, but we were covered in, like, disgusting stuff. We had one shower, and we were like, okay, let's just shower together. Within a half a second, you're over it. Like, it really is like that first moment. But I really believe if we all just were like, no more clothes, it would take, like, 0.2 seconds.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

For people to get over it. Now, granted, now with the I'm sure the world. Things be complicated.

[A]

Okay. I'm not.

[B]

I'm not really pitching this, but I could see myself loving being a nudist. I really could. I think it's so. I really think it's weird. I'm not like that about most things, but I'm like, why are we wearing clothes? We've just spent so much money on clothes. Sure. The clothing industry is so bad for the environment. Sure. What are we doing? Yeah. What are we doing?

[A]

Yeah, you.

[B]

So I would dress like. Kermit, you love fashion, and you. I feel like you're. One of your style inspirations is Miss Piggy.

[A]

I'm a diva.

[B]

You are. And I'm obsessed with you.

[A]

I love Miss Piggy. Yeah. I would like to think I'm able to read the room a little more than her, maybe a little more thoughtful.

[B]

But I do think she's loud and proud, and she says what's on her mind. And I think Kermit's just like, yeah, that's my wife. Like, I feel like all the time we'll be at somewhere, and you're sharing an intense opinion, and I'm like, yeah, that's my wife.

[A]

We are somewhere, and I'm sharing an intense opinion.

[B]

You have big thoughts.

[A]

So do you.

[B]

Of course. But I'm saying this is a positive thing I love about you is like, we'll be out with friends. And Jordan's like, this is what I think about this thing. And I'm like, even if sometimes I, like, don't really get it, I'm like, yes, yes, bitch. It is. Like, I just like. I feel like I'm like your hype man in that way.

[A]

That's so funny.

[B]

Like, I just back you up, but quietly. Like, if you have a problem with someone Even if I fully don't get it, I'm like, yeah. And I'm with her, you know, like, that's Kermit.

[A]

Miss Piggy, I completely feel.

[B]

Cuz Miss Piggy's always like having drama with something and I think I'm like, my problem is if you hurt my wife's feelings, you upset my wife. That's the problem. I don't care what her reasoning is. You know what I mean?

[A]

Yeah, absolutely. Jess and Nick from New Girl.

[B]

I'm definitely much more like Nick. And you're much more like Jess, I think.

[A]

Tell me more about that.

[B]

Well, because that's not what I would have guessed. Really?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I guess I feel more, you know.

[A]

The show better than I do, to be clear.

[B]

I love New Girl. Yeah. I'm just trying to get Jordan to watch.

[A]

Whatever you think is right, I'm sure is right.

[B]

No, I think it is one of those. That's a mix. Because here's what I'll say. Nick is very bizarre in a way that I feel I am. Nick is like always doing a. He's. I mean, he's writing a zombie novel. He's like, just doing a new thing. He invented something that he. He gets excited about these things. I also haven't seen the show in many years, but he's just more kind of all over the place. Jess is more like, here's my job I have. I mean, she's kind of like the street. She's very funny on this show. I don't want to call her the street man, but all the. She's the least, like, sketchy character on the show, I would say. And I think she's much more. She plans things. I mean, one of the reasons they break up is because he. She wants to make a plan for, like, life. And he's kind of like, I can't do that for you. We don't have that problem. But I think he's just more like, life could take me anywhere. You know what I mean?

[A]

Yes.

[B]

What I will say is I think he spirals a lot in a way that is maybe more similar to you. She's kind of like, calm down, everything's fine. You know what I mean?

[A]

Damn, I got all the bad traits.

[B]

No, no, no. I. I think that. No, I think the first one I said, he's kind of like. He's one of those characters. He's so charming. I think he's so funny in the show. He's someone you don't want to date. He's like, not like, I don't really know if he has. He's very sweet, which I think is like, both of us, but he's very sweet, But I think he's not a life partner that. Sure, they make it work in the end, but I'm like, he doesn't have a ton of, like, incredible qualities for a life partner.

[A]

Yeah, absolutely.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Meredith Gray and Christina Yang.

[B]

That's a hard one.

[A]

It is.

[B]

Meredith Gray. It's so hard. I'm so bad at this. I'm like, well, neither of us, because we're not that smart. I'm just like, we are. The thought of us being doctors, I'm immediately panicked. I'm like, don't, don't.

[A]

Don't know.

[B]

We can't. We can't, we can't. I think that I honestly don't remember enough. What do you think? I. I feel like my instinct is to say that you're Meredith and I'm Christina.

[A]

Wow. I feel the opposite.

[B]

I think you have a better head on your shoulders socially than I do. I think I get a little stressed and don't know how to handle things with interpersonally as much as you do.

[A]

I do understand that. I think I am less. Not romantic, but like, with me. No, not with you.

[B]

Because you are more romantic than I am.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

What?

[A]

I'm being attacked? I'm being attacked? No, I think that you're more, like, in your feelings a little bit than I am.

[B]

It's so hard. You know why? Because we're so. Yes, but in certain ways.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

It's like you're in your feelings about what you're in your feelings about. I'm in my feelings about what I'm in my feelings about. And I think what's nice is that the. Each of us, like, can't relate. I'm like. I think we're always like that. I'm like, why would you be stressed about that?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And you, to me about the things I get stressed about are like, why would you stress about that?

[A]

You know, It's a good. It's a good balance. I think the problem I'm having is I'm like, what are the attributes of Meredith Gray?

[B]

And that's the actual problem. You know what I mean? Kind of like it's giving vanilla now. What I will say is that I think that probably changes because I don't think. I mean, it's so impressive. It's like being a lead in a show for that long because it's like what a leading woman was back in. God, when did it start Then was it the 90s?

[A]

No.

[B]

Early 2000. Way early 2000s. Because it was. What's her name?

[A]

Me.

[B]

You were in it. I remember you were in it. Catherine Heigl. And that's like early 2000s. But what was a leading woman and then is so different from what people want, a leading woman now. So I'm sure she's full of personality now. I feel like in the beginning, it was kind of just like, she's just a girl.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And don't be wrong.

[A]

Cutie pie.

[B]

She's cutie pie.

[A]

But that's small.

[B]

Kind of like. Because I'm just a girl. I don't know.

[A]

She's an EPO baby.

[B]

She's the first original Nepo baby. I think I always think of Christina Yang. There's a scene, you guys. If you haven't seen it, there's an episode, and once again, God, Grey's Anatomy is like a blur because I watched it during the pandemic. I. You know how that goes. I watched, like, 800 episodes in two weeks when the world was ending. And I don't really. It's like bits and pieces I remember, but I remember there being a plot line that Christina really struggles when people. They have a family member that dies, and she has to tell them. And I related to that, where I was like, I couldn't be a doctor because I would not handle that well. I would be horrible. And I think it's the only kind of doctoring I do think you would know. Exactly. You would just get like, what does this person need from me? I think I would be so uncomfortable, and I would be so afraid to overstep that I would be seen as very cold, which is how I've been in many situations my life. I didn't think like this, but, like, you know when someone has a baby and you're, like, so scared to make them uncomfortable about their baby, where you're like, okay, I don't want to be rude and not ask about your birth, for example, but I also don't want.

[A]

You don't want to talk about that?

[B]

That I asked you about your birth. I want to not seem like it's. I'm not asking to hold your baby because I'm not helpful, but I also don't want you to think I'm creepy for wanting to hold your baby. It's just like. And so instead, I do nothing. And then I think it can come off cold, and there's a lot of internal panic. So I think if I worked in a hospital and I Had to tell someone their kid died. I could see myself just being like, hey, I'm just gonna let you know it's not. It didn't. He's gone and I'm. Way to go now.

[A]

I don't work here anymore.

[B]

Take your time. Goodbye. And they'd be like, why did she just tell me that? As if she son's appendix was removed. Like, why is she acting so, like, nonchalant about it? So that's why I think that also you've just always been cooler. Like, even.

[A]

What?

[B]

No, no, I'm serious. Like, but for real, like, I flounder in social settings. I always have. And. And now I think I'm good socially. Like, I think I'm a social fun person, but I more often than not, will fumble what I'm saying and then panic and be like, I don't even know what I'm talking about. You know, whatever. You don't do that. And I even. I was even worse when I was younger. You, I feel like, have always just been in social settings. You're just chill. I think I could pull hotter guys than I could have. Like, I feel like you. No, seriously, because let's look at it. Like, who's Christina's pulling? Well, I don't even remember that one redheaded doctor.

[A]

Right.

[B]

I don't even remember she dated. They date. So it's so impossible.

[A]

It's so impossible to remember.

[B]

But I could have seen you when you're younger, like, pulling the hottest doctor because you're just, like, cool. You all me. I do think so. Because I also think you have. And I mean, this is a compliment. You were the ultimate. I'm not like other girls when you're in high school. I guarantee it. No, yeah, in a good way, because that's what was in. No, of course you're doing this. No, not. And not in the way we use it now. Not like I'm not like other girls. Like, you were saying that. Not like. Not like other girls. Like you didn't have female friends, but not like other girls. Because, like, you were not like other girls. Like, I. Like, you were. You were a girl that guys were like. And maybe they said this. You don't know, but they were like, I wish we could date because I want a wife just like you. You know what I mean? And I was not that I was never. If I was never gonna be dating the hottest doctor, I was gonna be dating the weird doctor that people were like, that's sweet.

[A]

You know, the weird doctor from high school.

[B]

Yeah, the Weird, famous, we famously know. But do you know what I mean?

[A]

Yes, I understand what you're saying, and that's very sweet, and I love you.

[B]

You have the confidence to date the hottest doctor, too. I don't even think if I saw Hot doctor, I would not even think about dating them, because I'd be like. Like, the hot guy doctor's gonna.

[A]

You don't. Why would someone hot not want to date you?

[B]

No, I think as an adult now, I think. I mean, like, when I was dating men, which I didn't. That's my point. Like, I didn't do it. Like, I just, like, couldn't. I was like, no. And then I would just be like, I'll date someone who. My point is, though, in any social setting, like, that I'm not seeming cool. When we first started dating, you seemed much more cool than I did. It was very clear.

[A]

I think I was a little more.

[B]

Relaxed than I was clear. I was nervous, and it was clear that I was overthinking a lot. It was clear that I needed to know what was happen at every given moment. And I think you were sweet enough to, like, lean into it and also let yourself do that, because you could tell I was nervous. But, like, I think if I'd been chill, you could have been chill. I don't have that in me.

[A]

Okay, Kendall, I know you want to talk about this one. This will be our last one, and then we can go home.

[B]

Sorry.

[A]

I'm so tired. Are you guys mad at me for being hungover?

[B]

What do you guys think?

[A]

Drop it in the comments if you're mad at me. That's one thing I really struggle with. What are you mad at me?

[B]

You know, but everybody does, and I'm really. That's was, like, my goal this year. I was like, I don't care if people are mad at me anymore. No, I'm. I mean, I do. Like, I actually care deeply, but I'm trying to be like, who cares? Who cares if everyone's mad at you? I do think it's a confidence. I was saying this a minute ago, but, like, a confidence that being married has given me. Obviously, I knew we weren't going to break up. We were, like. We were very solid. But it is funny. Once we were married, I'm like, come at me. Try to come at me. Because no one's ever tried to come at me also, literally. But, like, the thought of someone being mad at me now I feel more like. And then what? I go home to my wife. I'm just so Like, I don't need anyone else to not. I mean, you're mad at me. I'm concerned because usually I was rude or something.

[A]

Yeah. You were very rarely mad at each other. Waverly and Nicole were my own.

[B]

Her. Thank you for bringing that up.

[A]

Someone wrote in.

[B]

That's very hard.

[A]

I've never watched this show.

[B]

I know who I want to be.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And I know who I am. And the answer is that I wish I was like, Nicole Hot. I mean, the name.

[A]

That's her name.

[B]

Nicole Hot. Isn't that fun?

[A]

Her name is Nicole Hot.

[B]

Come on. H A U G H T. It's so funny. The. The town they live in is so called Purgatory. This is why I just love shows like this. I'm like, you're having fun.

[A]

You're having fun.

[B]

You're having fun. You're having fun. Her name's. It's incredible. This show really was. This is why I'm like, you have to watch it even. It's just like a. Like, just take. Think of it as charity for me because I'm like, this really was huge. This was like 2015, 2014. It was a while ago.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

And not only they. The lesbian couple is in it the whole time.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Since episode one. It's like the season one is like them getting together. They're together the whole time. They're so cute. They're so healthy. They, like, never have a problem. Except one time when she's possessed. But that's like, really not on her.

[A]

That is. I will say that is one thing I like about Heated rivalry. And these aren't like, really spoilers, but if you're super sensitive, muff your ears. It's not just like non stop gay trauma, bad things happening, them being bad or whatever.

[B]

Which is what I like about romance. Yeah. Like, I love that. I think as a gay person, it's very healing to read romances where it's kind of like a Hallmark movie and you're just like, at no point am I afraid that something bad's gonna happen. And even when we were watching Heated Rivalry, I remember at one point you went, oh, my God, is he gonna die?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

If you watch it, you'll know at what point. And I turned to Jordan and I said, that's the beauty of this show and the beauty of romances. No, I can confidently tell you he's not going to.

[A]

So no one would ever die in a romance?

[B]

Not the main characters. God, no. I mean, no. People will, but not the main characters. And rarely someone close to Them. They're happy. They're supposed to be happy.

[A]

Interesting.

[B]

There. That's like. You know, people talk about seven husbands. Evan, Hugo. It's not technically a romance. To be considered a romance, it has to. To be in the romance section. It has to be. They have to have a happy ending. And I think as a. As a gay person, I have watched so many movies and shows and where it is just so sad.

[A]

Gay people never get to be happy.

[B]

And that's what I love about romance books. You can't. It literally can't qualify. Un. There's a happy ending.

[A]

And what does a happy ending entail?

[B]

They get together and they have a h. Literally, there's a scene at the end. Epilogues, like, when you're. When you're. When you're formatting it, it'll be like the happily ever after. They usually contain a scene. Not all of them, but at the end. It's the epilogue where they're just showing how happy they are. Everything works out. It's not even just their relationship. They both get their dream job. They both have better relationships with every other cast cast, like, every other character in the cast. Everything is just 10 out of 10 at the end.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

And the whole. The art of it is like, how do we make people feel like, how is this gonna work out? I think a good romance. I think a lot of romances, it's like. Well, it's very clear. A good romance is like, how are they gonna come back from this?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And they do. And that's just like, what you enjoy is like, how are the whole time going? How are they gonna make this work? Yeah. So I love that about it. What was I saying, though? Oh, with way hot. That's what they go by.

[A]

I've heard you say this. Yeah.

[B]

Waverly and Nicole, hot. Nicole is like a sexy cop. Now, that's a. What do you call it? A double or. What do you call it?

[A]

Not a double entendre.

[B]

What is it called?

[A]

An oxymoron.

[B]

No, not a double entendre. An oxymoron. A sexy cop. No, thank you. But she's dressed in, like, a western. It all feels very Western. She's dressed. She wears, like, a cowboy hat at parts of it.

[A]

Interesting.

[B]

So I wish I was like, her. She's very cool. She's also like. Yeah, she's cool. I haven't also. I haven't seen it in a long time, to be honest. But she and Waverly, at the beginning is dating a man, and I think so. Nicole's kind of Giving. I'm a lesbian. Like, I think there's even a part where she's like, when you guys break up, call me, you know? And Waverly's much more. Very whimsical, very silly.

[A]

So who's who?

[B]

That's what I'm saying. I wish I was Nicole Hop, but I'm not. I'm Waverly, clearly.

[A]

So my Nicole Hot.

[B]

Yes. You're definitely. I mean, I couldn't be. I, I, I am horrible in dangerous situations.

[A]

True.

[B]

Waverly is pretty naive, I would say. Like, I'm. I don't think of myself as naive, but I think I'm very. As I've gotten older, I guess better. But I think I'm impressionable. I'm excitable. Nicole Hot is not. Nicole Hot is also very loyal than you are. And, And I think there's even parts in the show I'm like, damn. Like, there's. Okay. If you haven't watched it by now, you're literally not going to, like, actually, specifically the show. You're not gonna. You are, I guess, my viewers. But there's a part where, like. And if you watch the show. You understand what I mean. I have absolutely no idea what's happening in the plot when this happens. Like, this show's plot is impossible to follow. But there's a part where Waverly, like, basically is gone for like, a year and a half in an alternate dimension. And she thinks it's been, like, three days, but it's been like, a year.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

When she gets back, Nicole Hot is, like, on her front porch with a rifle being like, I've been watching over your house for a year and a half. And I'm like, that's some Jordan Myrick. You would do that for me? If I disappeared into an alternate universe, you'd be like, I will stand in front of Kendall's house with a gun.

[A]

And I love my friends, I love my family, and I'll take care.

[B]

Yes. And that's. She's very loyal. She's. And I think Waverly's silly. And it's. But they love each other so much the whole time. I really. You should watch it.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

It's like lesbian history. It's like, you know, but it really is. I think, in media, you're. It's. We're in a weird time where it's like, well, you're experiencing the history now.

[A]

Because, like, you've never watched the L Word.

[B]

Dude, don't get me started. I know. And it's crazy.

[A]

Why don't you watch it. We have it.

[B]

No, I know. I, I need to watch it.

[A]

I used to watch it.

[B]

I've watched the first episode like eight times. I'm like, kind of like that went bored. But I need to, I should watch it. I don't know why I, I would love it. I need to just sit down and do it. It feels like the same way I feel about Game of Thrones. I'm like, do I have nine years to sit and watch this?

[A]

You don't have to like follow the L word in the same. Like Game of Thrones is hard because you're trying to be like, okay, who's who? And he's here and she's with him and da da, whatever. It's like too much going on. Whereas with the L word it doesn't really matter. Yeah.

[B]

Because I also even. I've never even really seen it and I still like, I know the characters because it's just so a it part of, of lesbian culture that I'm like, I know who's a bet. I know who's a who. You know what I mean? And so I, I'm. Yeah, I need to do that. But I just think like we're things now are. I mean, heated. Rivalry is historic.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Like all these things are historic. So I'm like, sometimes you just throw something, a bone. And I think Winona Earp is one of those things you say, thank you for your service. I'll give you a watch.

[A]

I love it. If there was a couple that you had to pick that were most like on tv. Is there one? One? The one that's the most.

[B]

Tom and Jerry.

[A]

Cuz I'm always chasing you around with a big frying pan. Yeah.

[B]

Let me think. Do you have one?

[A]

No. I was really hoping you would have one and then we could kind of jump in on that.

[B]

I think we're okay. I have one actually. I think we're a lot like Monica and Chandler from Friends.

[A]

That's one that people asked.

[B]

I think we're a lot like Monica and Chandler. I think every way you, well, you are a lot like Monica. I mean, it's hard because this is really boiling us down to. But that's what a sitcom character is. It's like Monica's whole thing is that she's neurotic and has like ocd.

[A]

Yeah. And she like so is a chef.

[B]

Literally. And like, is a chef. And then Chandler's like obsessed with her and is goofy and like jokes all the time and is like obsessed with her and is like stable for her. And is very, like. He's very loyal and. Except that one. I hate a cheating plotline.

[A]

Fine. Sure.

[B]

Cut it by boring. Nobody wants it. It ruins it. But he never cheated, to be clear. But there was just, like, rumors of it. I'm just like, I don't. Nobody wants that. But I think that we are actually so much like them. I also think we have a relationship that's very romantic privately and very, like, we love being together in. As partners. But I think we have a really strong friendship, which I think they have. Versus, like, I think, like, Rachel and Ross.

[A]

Ross. It's more.

[B]

It's more like that's a couple. Yeah, but they're not, like. I mean, I know they try to paint it this way, but I'm like, they're not giving besties.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Like, I really think Monica and Chandler are best friends.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah, I agree.

[B]

Versus, like, I think Rachel's best friend is Monica.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Even when she's with Ross. I think they are, like, each other's number one. Do you have one?

[A]

Who do you think? Well, I think that's. I think you're right. I think you hit the nail on the head. Who do you think is the best TV couple of all time?

[B]

Oh, my God. I mean, Lucy and Ricardo.

[A]

Maybe his name. I don't know how many times we.

[B]

Have to say Ricky Ricardo.

[A]

His name is not Ricardo.

[B]

I always call him Ricardo. But that's. Why do I do that?

[A]

I don't know.

[B]

Which is funny, because her whole thing.

[A]

Is being like, ricky, I'm home.

[B]

Yeah, well, because I think in my head I go, ricky's short for Ricardo.

[A]

And I understand that, actually.

[B]

But also, their son's name is Ricky.

[A]

Ricky Jr.

[B]

Which is confusing to me, which shouldn't be. That should be actually way easier for me to remember. But for some reason, I go, no, the son's name is Ricky. His name is Ricardo.

[A]

And it's like. No, he's named after the dad. That's like. So my grandfather was a Bill, and my dad is a Will.

[B]

Confusing.

[A]

Same name but different nicknames to.

[B]

Yeah. I think maybe they're one of the best of all time. I think they're weirdly very ahead of their time. Yeah, I like. I liked them. I think they were, like, a good. But they felt like friends. They felt like best friends. He felt like he really let her be her. And it felt similar. Honestly, a dynamic to you and I where it's like we really neg each other and we act like we're annoyed with the other's, like, Quirks. Like, we were really, you know, we're. I mean, you do a really similar thing to, like, Lucy. You're like, Kendall. You know, you're like, oh, I'm annoyed with her, but you're like, not.

[A]

Actually, that's.

[B]

I think we have that. I think at the end of the day, we, like, love each other. Who do you think's the best couple?

[A]

Hmm. I love. Who do I love? Who's my favorite?

[B]

It.

[A]

It's so hard. There's so many. I mean, obviously we already said. But Ken and Miss Piggy are big ones.

[B]

That's a good one. I mean, they're really good.

[A]

Yeah. I think Liz Lemon had some really good relationships on 30 Rock.

[B]

That is a crazy take. Jordan. Why? Liz Lemon is, like, horrible at dating. What? Like, that's her thing.

[A]

I know, but I think she.

[B]

Relationships that were cute, kind of. But Liz Levin is like the. Literally, her character is like. Like, she is not emotionally available enough to date.

[A]

I'm getting reprimanded.

[B]

You know who I like in that show?

[A]

Jack Avery.

[B]

Well, they're a good couple, but Jenna and the guy who's an impression. An impressionist of her.

[A]

An impressionist of her. He's a drag queen.

[B]

Wait, I thought. He does like her. He doesn't. He do, like Jenna. Drag. Okay. Yeah, that's. Oh, I thought.

[A]

Not an impressionist, I guess.

[B]

I don't know. A drag queen who's doing actor.

[A]

And you are. You're not wrong. It just made me laugh.

[B]

But I think they're a good.

[A]

They're very in love. I. I. And I love Tracy and his wife.

[B]

They're a great couple. We are similar to them in some ways.

[A]

We have the best parts of them.

[B]

An upsetting amount of similarities to Tracy in that show, which is. Is a real hit for me.

[A]

And I do think I'm similar to Angie Jordan.

[B]

You are very. But I think. You know what's hard? I think that's because you've had a lot of influence from Angie Jordan. I think you watched that show, and it really formed your sense of humor.

[A]

Wife. I'm going to be.

[B]

Yes. And I think you are kind of like that.

[A]

That's fair.

[B]

You, though, did say a lot. You were like, I feel like you a lot like Ilya and Shane, which I thought was so funny. I kept thinking I was like, Jordan, that's so complimentary of us. Like, everyone is dying over how hot these people are. Like, wait, that's literally.

[A]

I didn't say they looked just like us, even though they do I just said that we have a lot of fun similarities. That's the thing. So often. And this is why I don't like a lot of romance so often in things like that. The way that couples are depicted is just 100%. Like, they're either fighting or they're like, whatever. And I like it because they, like, like, joke with each other, they get irritated with each other, but then, like, get over it quickly. They make fun of each other. Like, all those things, at least to Kendall and I, are very real to our relationship. So I think it seems fun to see those things depicted.

[B]

Well, you got to find a good romance. But I think what you also have to remember, this is so of me, some people are not as funny as us. So I think sometimes you're like, this isn't realistic. And I'm like, I think sometimes, like, people are more serious in relationships than we are.

[A]

That's true.

[B]

We'll talk, too. We've had multiple friends. We've been like, well, you guys do, like, baby talk all the time. And they're like, no. People who've been together years, years never did baby talk.

[A]

We're like, oh, you know when you, like, argue, and they're like, no, we never argue in Kendall.

[B]

Or like, you know what? People don't debrief with their partners. I think a lot of people do. But that's crazy to me. Like, we'll be like, I'll talk to a friend. I'm like, well, you probably told your husband about that after Instagram. No, we didn't talk about that. I'm like, something that crazy at the bar happened and you didn't tell. I'm telling. I mean, when you get home, I go, tell me everything. No, tell me.

[A]

What do you actually. What's the first thing you say when I get home?

[B]

I don't know. What. What do I say?

[A]

Did anybody talk about me?

[B]

Did anyone talk about me?

[A]

Did anyone ask about me? Did anyone talk about what people say?

[B]

And you always like, everybody said, hey, everybody said, how's she doing? I guess she walked in as a unit. How's she doing? How's she doing? And that's all I want to hear. No, but I think some people are more serious with their partner. They're just kind of like, we're dating. We see each other, but versus. I think we have much more of a friendship. And I think they had that. But I think that's very queer.

[A]

I think it's very queer, very gay.

[B]

To be besties with. I think straight people totally have It. But I think it's like, I think like you're, you're my wife and you're the love of my life, but you're also like one of my girlies. You know what I mean? Like, I talk to you the same way. Like when I call my best friend Nicole. I'm yapping the same way that I yap with you. I think a lot of people as like men have gotten better. They've been a little more, you know, feminist men and we've gotten some.

[A]

We're breeding them better.

[B]

Yeah, exactly. I think, think they're. People have that with their husbands, but I am always surprised when they don't. But I. I totally get that. And some. I'm reading a book right now where it's like the way they talk to each other, it's just like every two seconds they're like, and if you're not ready to speak on that, you can let me know. And I want to take space for that. I'm just like.

[A]

Who talks to their partner like that?

[B]

I'm tired and I have like, of course. But I'm like, have a little fun.

[A]

Yeah, have a little fun.

[B]

Neck each other a little bit.

[A]

But that brings up a good point that you will do literally anything to not finish that book about the Donner party I got you for Christmas two years ago.

[B]

Go. Well, it's not. It's not necessarily a happy read is what I'll tell you. And weirdly, I think I started thinking of it as a Christmas book where I was like, well, I'll read it around the holidays. Just so funny. It's about people get snowed. I mean, you know what the Donner Party is? They have to eat each other cuz they're so cold. Why am I like, that's a holiday book. I actually really like the book. It's also this. What I told you. I've read a lot of it. It's not like a story. I mean, it's a story. I already know the story though, how it ends. So it's not like I get to the end of the chapter and I'm like like, what is going to happen next? So I think that's what usually like I'm re. I love reading it, but I'm never like, I got to get home and read my Donner Party book. Which honestly, if I was like that, that'd be a red flag.

[A]

Interesting.

[B]

That would be a red flag. I. Nothing's more fascinating to me though, you know that.

[A]

Well, that's why I got you this book for Christmas because you're so interested in the Donner Party. So I was like, great, I'll get you this book. And it just sits on your bedside table. And then you just start a new book. And you start a new book, and you never finish this Donner Party book.

[B]

I think the Donner Party. We've talked about this before, but every. Wherever you grew up has their little bit of history that you think everyone knows.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

And I. I felt very lucky, because this is horrible, but I. The Donner Party was ours. Like, that was right where I.

[A]

Party was ours.

[B]

Well, that was the thing.

[A]

It was right.

[B]

I mean, we literally. We were where the Donner Party happened. And I feel lucky in the sense that it was really interesting. Like, that's, like, a good one. Sure.

[A]

Where you're like.

[B]

Because you're, like, in fourth grade, you're never learning about anything interesting, and all of a sudden, your teacher's like. And then they started eating each other, and you're like, excuse me.

[A]

Hello. I mean, that's, like, the first.

[B]

I'd never heard about anything like that. When you're in fourth grade.

[A]

Cannib.

[B]

No, that's good. Even about murder, you're so young that it's like, you don't hear anything like that. And then all of a sudden. And I remember we learned about the Donner Party the same month we learned about nuclear weapons. I was like, I'm actually tapping out on Earth, guys. This is. It was a lot, but it's a very interesting one. Some people just have, like, the Liberty Bell or something. And you're like, true. No, hate to the Liberty Bell.

[A]

I'm just the fountain of youth.

[B]

Not as fun, though, right? I don't know. As a story about a family who gets trapped and has to eat each.

[A]

Other, I guess your definition of fun. I can't believe they haven't made a Donner Party TV show.

[B]

We got to get you home.

[A]

Thank you, guys.

[B]

No, you actually are fine.

[A]

You.

[B]

I just.

[A]

Do I seem wild?

[B]

You don't seem wild.

[A]

You seem.

[B]

You don't seem anything. You're doing a great job. I can see in your eyes you don't feel good.

[A]

I feel like I'm gonna watch the episode back and be like, I seem like I'm high on drugs.

[B]

No, you don't seem high.

[A]

I'm not to be clear.

[B]

But also, you're fun when you're high.

[A]

Kendall, I've never been high. Thank you again for watching this podcast. As you know, we are completely independently created, produced, made, and Kendall and I do all of that with money from our own pocket that we get from doing the show and we put it back into the podcast. So if you like the podcast, please, like, comment, subscribe, join our Patreon. Follow us on social media, do whatever you can. Stay involved because it really helps write and review us.

[B]

It's truly so appreciated. Thank you all for being here. And comment down below what characters from TV shows you think Jordan and I.

[A]

Are like or which one you and your partner identify with most closely.

[B]

I love it. All right, thank you guys. Monday. Bye.

[C]

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