HER Style Podcast Episode 304 Summary
Episode Title:
Is Your Style Holding You Back? The Subtle Ways It Shrinks Your Confidence
Air Date: January 5, 2026
Host: Heather Riggs, Certified Image Consultant & Color Specialist
Episode Overview
In this New Year’s episode, Heather Riggs explores how the clothes we wear can subtly, yet significantly, affect our daily confidence and how we interact with the world. Rather than recommending the latest fashion trends, she invites listeners to think more deeply about the connection between style and self-expression. Heather encourages women to recognize when they’re playing it safe, hiding in their wardrobes, and postponing their best selves for another day. The episode aims to empower listeners to use their wardrobe intentionally, supporting a more confident and authentic presence every day.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. Personal Story and Introduction to the Topic
- Heather opens with a relatable observation:
- "Have you ever noticed how on the days you don't feel great in what you're wearing, you're just a little quieter?...You don't walk into the room like, yep, I belong here." (00:00)
- She underscores that confidence and expressiveness are often connected to how supported we feel in our clothing, even though we tend to blame other factors for feeling “off.”
2. How Clothing Influences Confidence
- Heather draws from Jojo Moyes’ novel Someone Else’s Shoes to illustrate how an outfit can alter the way someone shows up in the world.
- A character accidentally wears someone else’s high-end clothes and, after an awkward start, ends up owning the day with newfound boldness. This highlights that while designer items aren't magical, feeling supported by what you wear affects how you present yourself.
- Memorable quote:
- “Most of us think that getting dressed is a small, practical part of our day...But there’s something we don’t talk about very often, and it’s how much what we’re wearing can influence how we show up.” (04:54)
3. The ‘Safe’ Wardrobe Trap
- Many women default to “safe” or familiar clothing choices to avoid drawing attention or to make the morning routine easier, but Heather notes there’s a hidden cost:
- “Safe feels easy, it’s familiar...But other times, I think safe is less about comfort and more about not wanting to stand out.” (08:37)
- She points out that saving our favorite or bolder pieces for “later”—a time that rarely comes—means delaying experiencing our best selves.
4. Self-Limiting Behavior and the ‘Someday’ Wardrobe
- Heather describes how many women wait until they feel confident, thinner, or more accomplished before allowing themselves to wear what they love.
- “A lot of women think they need to feel confident before they dress differently...But in real life, it usually works the other way around.” (10:29)
- Confidence isn’t a prerequisite for style; rather, making authentic style choices can build confidence over time.
5. Redefining “Taking Up Space”
- Taking up space through style is often misunderstood as dressing loudly or to get attention.
- “Sometimes it is much quieter than that. It might look like wearing the outfit you usually save for a special occasion or choosing the color that you love instead of defaulting to something that blends in.” (12:12)
6. Actionable Advice: Style-Reflection Exercises
- Heather provides tangible questions to help listeners reflect on their wardrobe habits and challenge limiting beliefs:
- “Instead of asking, does this outfit look okay? Try asking, does this outfit help me show up fully?” (12:45)
- Where are you playing it safe with your style to avoid attention?
- How does what you wear affect how you speak, move, or participate in your day?
- If you stopped waiting to feel ready, what would you wear differently right now, even in a small way?
7. Encouragement and Closing Thoughts
- Heather leaves listeners with empowering reminders:
- "You do not need someone else's shoes to feel confident. You just need clothes that help communicate an accurate story about who you are and help you show up in your full confidence and power." (13:50)
- She invites listeners to share their experiences and reflections via Instagram direct message.
Notable Quotes & Moments
| Timestamp | Quote/Moment | Speaker | |---------------|--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------|---------------| | 00:00 | “Have you ever noticed how on the days you don't feel great in what you're wearing, you're just a little quieter?...” | Heather Riggs | | 04:54 | “Most of us think that getting dressed is a small, practical part of our day...But there’s something we don’t talk about very often, and it’s how much what we’re wearing can influence how we show up.” | Heather Riggs | | 08:37 | “Safe feels easy, it’s familiar...But other times, I think safe is less about comfort and more about not wanting to stand out.” | Heather Riggs | | 10:29 | “A lot of women think they need to feel confident before they dress differently...But in real life, it usually works the other way around.” | Heather Riggs | | 12:12 | “Sometimes it is much quieter than that. It might look like wearing the outfit you usually save for a special occasion or choosing the color that you love instead of defaulting to something that blends in.” | Heather Riggs | | 13:50 | “You do not need someone else's shoes to feel confident. You just need clothes that help communicate an accurate story about who you are and help you show up in your full confidence and power.” | Heather Riggs |
Timestamped Segment Highlights
- [00:00–01:07] – Opening observations about the “quiet” ways clothes affect confidence.
- [04:00–06:00] – Story from Someone Else’s Shoes and parallels to real-life experiences.
- [07:00–09:30] – Safe choices in the wardrobe; saving special pieces for “later.”
- [10:00–11:30] – How reversing the order (dressing confidently first) can build real confidence.
- [12:12–13:40] – The subtle ways of “taking up space” and dressing authentically for yourself.
- [12:45–14:20] – Actionable self-reflection questions and an invitation to engage further.
Practical Takeaways
- Reflect on whether your current style is helping you “show up fully” or holding you back.
- Stop saving your best clothes “for later”—wear them now for yourself, not an imaginary future.
- Use Heather’s reflection questions to uncover where your wardrobe might quietly be muting your self-expression.
- Remember: Confidence builds through intentional, authentic style choices—not the other way around.
Next Steps & Listener Engagement
- Heather encourages listeners to continue the conversation by DMing her on Instagram (@heatherriggstyle) and to take her free personal style quiz.
- She hints at exciting upcoming content for the new year and invites everyone to subscribe for updates.
Overall Tone: Supportive, empowering, practical, and warmly conversational—making style accessible and connected to well-being, not just trends.
Recommended for: Women seeking a deeper, more intentional connection with how they dress, and anyone feeling stuck in a “safe” style rut who wants to step into greater confidence.
