Patreon Preview #322: Midland General Hospital

Summary

Hey Riddle Riddle – Patreon Preview #322: Midland General Hospital

Release Date: May 9, 2025

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Introduction

In the "Patreon Preview #322: Midland General Hospital" episode of Hey Riddle Riddle, hosted by the comedic trio from Headgum—Adal Rifai, Erin Keif, and John Patrick Coan—listeners are treated to a humorous and engaging glimpse into life at Midland General Hospital. While the podcast typically revolves around solving riddles and puzzles, this special preview diverges into a scripted scenario, showcasing the improvisational talents of the hosts as they navigate the quirks and challenges of hospital life. This detailed summary captures the essence of the episode, highlighting key discussions, witty exchanges, and the dynamic interplay between the characters.

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Setting the Scene: A Night at Midland General Hospital

The episode opens with Annie, Doug, and Ted, portrayed by Erin Keif, John Patrick Coan, and Adal Rifai respectively, engaging in a lively conversation about their recent shifts at Midland General Hospital. The atmosphere is casual yet filled with the underlying tension and camaraderie typical of hospital staff during a long night.

• Annie's Update: At [00:03], Annie greets the group with a cheerful "Morning. Morning. How's everybody feeling today?" setting a lighthearted tone for the conversation.

• Doug's Chipper Mood: Doug responds humorously at [00:07], "Somebody's chipper," hinting at a positive disposition despite the demanding environment.

• Ted's Long Shift: Ted shares his experience at [00:08], mentioning, "I've been here for 10 hours, so I got, you know," emphasizing the fatigue that comes with long hospital shifts.

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Personal Lives Intersect with Professional Duties

As the conversation unfolds, the hosts delve into their personal lives, blending humor with relatable scenarios faced by medical professionals.

• Sleeping Arrangements: A significant portion of the dialogue revolves around the duo, Annie and Doug, who appear to be navigating their personal relationship within the professional setting of the hospital.

  • Annie clarifies at [01:19], "Also, here is a toothbrush," humorously implying the blending of personal and professional spaces.

  • Ted addresses the situation directly at [02:03], stating, "We know that you guys are sleeping together. We all know everyone," bringing a candid perspective to workplace relationships.

• Hospital Policies and Ethics: Ted discusses hospital policies regarding employees sleeping on the job, highlighting at [02:06], "We can, like, go home during shifts when we're a little tired, sort of," juxtaposed with hospital rules that prohibit leaving the premises during shifts ([02:11]).

• Humorous Anecdotes: The hosts intersperse their conversation with light-hearted jokes and references to popular medical shows like Scrubs.

  • Annie remarks at [04:02], "He’s so nice, it's really weird," referencing the distinctly friendly janitor, a nod to the quirky characters often found in medical dramas.

  • Doug adds humor at [04:10], contemplating grabbing breakfast burritos and humorous discussions about Taco Bell’s impact on their energy levels ([02:46]), culminating in Annie asserting the role of fast food in their operational success ([02:56]).

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Interpersonal Dynamics and Confessions

The episode takes a deeper dive into the interpersonal relationships among the trio, revealing vulnerabilities and humorous confessions.

• Annie's Pregnancy and Marital Struggles: Annie opens up about her pregnancy and absence of her husband, stating at [07:05], "Do you have a husband? Do you have a. Do you have a husband?" This leads to a comedic exchange about husbands' habits and the strains of balancing personal life with the demanding nature of hospital work.

  • Doug humorously shares his experience at [08:12], talking about his husband’s intricate lunch notes and the unintended exposure they create.

• Broken Lamps and Gaming Mishaps: The conversation takes a funny turn when Annie explains her husband's accident with a lamp while playing VR games ([08:41]), leading to a playful exchange where Doug impersonates Ted and dramatizes the situation ([09:32] to [10:24]).

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Humor Inspired by Medical Dramas

Throughout the episode, the hosts effectively parody elements from popular medical TV shows, particularly Scrubs, adding layers of humor and familiarity for listeners.

• Breaking the Fourth Wall: Annie frequently references Scrubs ([06:10]), blurring the lines between the scripted scenario and the improvisational nature of the podcast.

• Ted's Frustrations: Ted expresses his weariness and frustration, yet maintains humor, as seen at [06:26], "This is the longest I think I've ever talked to either one of you or both of you," highlighting the exhaustion felt during long shifts.

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Conclusion and Call to Action

As the episode nears its end, the characters wrap up their humorous hospital escapades, leading to a playful sign-off.

• Final Jokes and Encouragement: The trio continues their comedic tussle, culminating in Annie's lead into the Patreon promotion at [10:31], "Hate Riddle. Riddle's Clue Crew."

• Patreon Invitation: Ted concludes the episode by encouraging listeners to support the podcast, saying, "Listen to the rest of the episode now by starting your free seven day trial at patreon.com.heyriddleriddle."

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Notable Quotes

• Annie on Personal Life: "[...] I'm pregnant and the baby's coming, so." ([07:00])

• Doug on Husband's Habits: "He puts these really intricate notes in my lunchbox. And sometimes people can read them." ([08:12])

• Humorous Take on Hospital Life: "I smell sex, and." ([02:46])

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Final Thoughts

"Patreon Preview #322: Midland General Hospital" offers a delightful departure from Hey Riddle Riddle’s usual format, showcasing the hosts’ improvisational skills through a scripted hospital scenario. The blend of humor, relatable workplace dynamics, and playful references to medical dramas create an engaging experience for both regular listeners and newcomers. Whether you're a fan of witty banter or enjoy the behind-the-scenes look at hospital life, this episode promises a hearty dose of laughter and entertainment.

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If you've enjoyed this preview and want to hear more exclusive content, consider joining the Clue Crew on Patreon here.

Transcript

[Annie]

Morning. Morning. How's everybody feeling today?

[Doug]

Somebody's chipper.

[Ted]

I've been here for 10 hours, so I got, you know. Oh, before. Nah, it's okay. Yeah, it was actually, honestly, it was a pretty chill night. It was.

[Annie]

Sorry, Ted. You were saying it was a chill 10 hours.

[Ted]

Well, not like a chill 10 hours, but it just. It wasn't this, like, know. It wasn't as hectic as, you know, as. As it can get in here, especially for a Saturday night. Right. Like, it's.

[Annie]

Oh, yeah.

[Doug]

Yeah. I slept in my own house, in my own bed.

[Annie]

Whoa. That's. That's Annie. That's pretty cool.

[Doug]

Wait, yeah. You did, too, right?

[Ted]

Wait, Annie, what do you mean?

[Doug]

I'm saying that's my big update for me. We're all sort of going over our last 10 hours. You said you had a pretty chill time here at the hospital, and then you're on shift.

[Ted]

You went home and slept at your bed.

[Annie]

Yeah, and definitely in her. She went to her place and slept in her bed is what you asked. What you said.

[Doug]

Yeah, I went to my place and I slept in my bed.

[Annie]

Yeah, me too. That's same.

[Ted]

Well, yeah, Doug, that's fine for you because you weren't on shift, but, Annie, you. You were on. I saw you multiple times throughout the night. Were you going home? Were you driving home?

[Annie]

Also, here is a toothbrush.

[Doug]

Oh, yeah.

[Annie]

If you need one or something.

[Doug]

And do you have, like, extra glasses at your place?

[Annie]

I will look for those.

[Ted]

We know that you guys are sleeping together. We all know everyone.

[Annie]

The hospital. The hospital strictly forbids any employees sleeping.

[Doug]

It's forbaden. It's forbaden. So it's also.

[Ted]

It's not. It's truly not.

[Doug]

It's not.

[Ted]

No. Because you guys are. You're both. You're both residents. So, like, you know, it's fine if you sleep together.

[Doug]

Yeah, but nobody cares about that. Married.

[Ted]

Well, yeah, but, I mean, it's not. It's immoral, but it's not, like, against, like, hospital. There's no, like, you know, hospital morality clause.

[Annie]

Oh, okay.

[Ted]

Like, we have to be ethical, but we don't have to be moral, if you understand.

[Doug]

Yeah. We can, like, go home during shifts when we're a little tired, sort of.

[Ted]

That. No, that's.

[Doug]

That.

[Ted]

No, you have to sleep here at the hospital.

[Doug]

That's all the same stuff. If you want to go get Taco Bell mid shift, you can go. If you want to go sleep with someone, your husband, you can.

[Ted]

No, you can't leave to go to Taco Bell. You leave to go to Taco Bell.

[Doug]

If you don't do it, doesn't mean people don't and can't and shan't do it.

[Ted]

You know, it was a kind of chill night. But if something goes wrong, you're a doctor. You're here working. You have to be. It's an emergency room. You have to be ready.

[Doug]

If something goes wrong, people are going to be happy that I'm re energized by sex and Taco Bell is what I'm saying. People are gonna be happy that I'm in a good mood from all the sex and Taco Bell.

[Annie]

I smell sex, and.

[Ted]

Nobody gets energized from sex at Taco Bell, okay.

[Doug]

Okay, well, you're doing it wrong if you're not.

[Annie]

I read a study, okay? I read a study that said when doctors have just eaten high caloric fast food operations are 97% more successful.

[Ted]

So you read that study?

[Annie]

I read that study. It was done by. I believe it was the Yale. The Yale studies.

[Ted]

You believe the Yale put out that study?

[Annie]

I think so. I think I believe it.

[Doug]

I think I believe it, too.

[Ted]

Yeah, that's fine. And it's fine. And it's fine. Here's what I'll say. I'm not your boss, you know, I'm just another resident in the program as well. Nobody cares that you're sleeping together, even though that you're both married. That's totally fine. I don't care about that. Okay, you gotta stop leaving the hospital when you're on shift. You have to stay at the hospital the whole time you're on shift. Okay?

[Doug]

Unless it's for Taco Bell or sex, I will not leave the hospital.

[Annie]

Yeah, we each get two sort of caveats. And here's the thing, Tad. I feel like the problem is Annie and I grew up. Scrubs is our favorite show, and I feel like it's all of our favorite shows. We thought working in a hospital would be way more like Scrubs. The janitor here is so nice to us.

[Doug]

He's so nice, it's really weird.

[Ted]

That's the big difference.

[Annie]

We don't break out into song as much. Except for what I just said. I smell sex with Taco Bell.

[Doug]

I'm go get some breakfast burritos from.

[Annie]

Ooh, grab me one. Yes, yes, yes.

[Ted]

First, the Taco Bell breakfast menu is awful.

[Doug]

Says who?

[Ted]

That's the consensus.

[Doug]

Says who?

[Ted]

Why didn't you think that it would be more like ER or House or like one of those trauma hospitals?

[Annie]

What are they Called. We work in an er and I live in a house.

[Doug]

You're tired. You're acting crazy.

[Ted]

I am tired. Okay, you know what? I'm tired. I'm overreacting. Here's the thing. I only have a couple hours left on my shift. I'm just gonna stay. I'm just gonna work it. And this is not my business. If an administrator talks to you about it, that's another thing. But it's not my business, so I just won't get involved.

[Doug]

Okay? And just both of our significant others work here, so I'd say just easy on talking about us sleeping together.

[Annie]

Yeah. Be cool. Can you be cool?

[Ted]

I brought it up just to say that everyone knows. I imagine your spouses know about this. They have to know. You brought the toothbrush here to work. Why wouldn't you just leave the toothbrush? Why would you bring the toothbrush to work and hand it to her at work?

[Doug]

So his wife doesn't see the toothbrush.

[Annie]

Yeah, I'm not stupid. Actually, I do have to grab those glasses. I have to go home and grab glasses.

[Doug]

Can you give me some Taco Bell on the way back?

[Annie]

Hondo pee.

[Doug]

Thank you so much. Baja Blast for the road, please.

[Annie]

Of course, For Melissa and Tad. Here's the thing. My wife.

[Ted]

For the road.

[Annie]

They're not catching on the road. My wife does the CAT scans, okay? And there's something about her feelings and the CAT scans where it almost feels like every day she has a new memory, okay? So she does not know that I'm sleeping around.

[Ted]

Okay? I mean, again, it is.

[Doug]

She's getting rattled by the machinery.

[Ted]

She shouldn't be.

[Doug]

Something's happening in her brain. She's getting scrambled.

[Ted]

She should be. She should be in that room behind the CAT scan.

[Doug]

Can I do an impression of you really quick?

[Annie]

She gets.

[Ted]

I don't.

[Doug]

Everyone's supposed to be a professional blee. Bl. Everyone should do. Everyone should buy. The bus.

[Annie]

May be 1cm apart.

[Doug]

We should try not to kill the patients.

[Ted]

Blah, blah, blah.

[Annie]

I prefer.

[Ted]

I know. I know what you guys are trying to do, but it just kind of does feel targeted because I am gay and I know.

[Annie]

This is like Scrubs. This is like Scrubs. This is like Scrubs.

[Ted]

It's not like Scrubs. And I know what you have a gay character. No, no, I'm not a gay character.

[Doug]

Whoa.

[Ted]

Doug, look. Hey, you know what? It doesn't matter. Again, it. This is, by the way, the longest I think I've ever talked to either one of you or both of you.

[Doug]

Kind of met you in passing. What were we talking about? Oh, yes. Good morning. Hey, Mama. Looks like you are 7cm dilated. It's just. Just be a couple more hours, okay? And then we'll be ready to push. How are you feeling?

[Annie]

I'm a little nervous. I'm a little upset. My husband's not here.

[Doug]

I think he might be in the hallway. He's playing video games on his.

[Annie]

He brought his switch. Yeah. Yes. I guess Chrono Trigger or Chrono Cross. Some game. Got remastered, and he said he had to play it before his friends did, so. But it's fine. We're happy. And I'm pregnant and the baby's coming, so.

[Doug]

Yeah.

[Annie]

Do you have a husband? Do you have a. Do you have a husband?

[Doug]

I do. He is actually one of my sons has a soccer tournament, so they're out of state all together. They're sort of spending time together.

[Annie]

Could you just. And I'm so sorry. I just feel like I. There's a. I have a lot of. Just sort of hormones.

[Doug]

Of course. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Annie]

Do you mind saying something negative about your husband? Because I just said I feel bad about kind of dissing my husband, so if you said something bad about your husband, I feel much better.

[Doug]

Oh, well, when my husband packs my lunch every day, he puts these really intricate notes in my lunchbox. And sometimes people can read them. And I feel like I'm like, ah, Jeff. People can see it when my note falls out of my lunchbox.

[Annie]

Okay. And he calls you, like, a cunt in those or something?

[Doug]

No, he doesn't call me a cunt.

[Annie]

In those.

[Doug]

But he does, like, talk about how he values me and loves me and thinks I'm a really good mom and partner. But you know what? You had your epidural, so your husband puts little notes.

[Annie]

My husband puts little notes in my lunch sometimes. And it's a lot of, like, reminders. So it'll say, like, wash jeans, his jeans. Fix lamp. Yeah, it's a lot of.

[Doug]

What happened to the lamp?

[Ted]

He.

[Annie]

He was playing VR. He was playing Beat Saber. And he swung wildly.

[Doug]

Yep.

[Annie]

And broke. Broke a lamp.

[Doug]

Yeah. Okay. So we get. We get a lot of these husbands in here. The state of the world. Sort of how low standards can be for men. Do you want me to say something? I can go out there and sort of maybe tell them that the video games mess with the machinery or something.

[Annie]

Oh, actually, if you don't mind, Dr. Lawrence, that would be. That would be actually very kind.

[Doug]

I would love to.

[Annie]

Okay.

[Doug]

I would love to.

[Annie]

And call him. Don't call him Peter. I know that's on the records. It says Peter. Call him Petey, okay? Otherwise he'll snap.

[Doug]

Got it? Got it. Hey, Petey.

[Ted]

Good. Are you the lamp tech? Because I wasn't even touching the lamp. But it is, as you can see, broken.

[Doug]

Broke.

[Ted]

It shouldn't be a lamp out here. Really?

[Doug]

Heard you downloaded a new game today, Peter. How's your new game?

[Ted]

Kind of overstepping things for a lamp tech. I'm good. I could just use more light because I didn't get the OLED back.

[Doug]

Listen, motherfucker.

[Ted]

Look at me.

[Doug]

Look at me. Look at me, Petey. Look at me. I will be full of poisonous drugs. Get your together. Yeah. Pee, you little idiot. P. Idiot.

[Ted]

It feels good.

[Doug]

No, no, no.

[Ted]

Oh, I like this. Oh, something's awakening in P.E.

[Doug]

No, no, no.

[Ted]

Yeah. Yes.

[Doug]

All right. Throws you down on the ground. Smash his Nintendo Switch over my knee.

[Ted]

Yes. Break it. Break it more.

[Doug]

Oh, this is awful. Never mind for me.

[Ted]

Break it for me. No wash jeans.

[Annie]

1, 2, 3, 4.

[Doug]

Hate Riddle. Riddle's Clue crew.

[Ted]

Listen to the rest of the episode now by starting your free seven day trial at patreon. Com. Heyriddle. Riddle.