Patreon Preview #346: King Mumbles pt. 4 w/ Rob White

Summary

Hey Riddle Riddle: Patreon Preview #346: King Mumbles pt. 4 w/ Rob White

Date: October 24, 2025
Hosts: Adal Rifai, Erin Keif, John Patrick Coan (JPC)
Guest: Rob White (as King Mumbles)

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Episode Overview

This episode continues the "King Mumbles" saga, finding the crew—Adal, Erin, and JPC—in a whimsical, lightly anachronistic castle filled with eccentric decor and abundant peach trees. They’re on their way to meet the enigmatic King Mumbles, whose quirks and reclusive lifestyle lead to hilarious improvised encounters, gentle pokes at fantasy and royalty tropes, and memorable character work from guest Rob White. The episode focuses much more on improv and character comedy than riddles per se, staying true to the show’s tone of playful chaos.

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Key Discussion Points and Highlights

1. Castle Tour and First Impressions

• The gang marvels at the castle’s odd mix of styles.
  • "Would you say this is like Georgian, like a Georgian building?" (Adal, 00:54)
  • "More like Florida." (Erin, 00:59)
  • Commenting on the peach trees and the Georgia-esque heat:
    • "I've never seen a castle with a porch." (Adal, 01:05)
• They notice humorous anachronisms:
  • Throne room is labeled “bathroom”; decor includes “live, laugh, love” signs.
  • "I think that the decor in here is all over the place. Little cheugy castle." (JPC & Adal, 02:16)

2. Meeting King Mumbles

• They find King Mumbles in a vulnerable state, leading to comedic awkwardness.
  • "I just thought the king would be... a big guy." (Adal, 02:48)
  • King Mumbles explains his sickly appearance is due to childhood illness.
  • "I did fully physically recover on the inside. It's just the outside doesn't look so good." (King Mumbles, 03:58)
• King Mumbles is posing for a portrait in an unconventional pose:
  • "All fours on the ground, ass pointed up, face turned around with a little whisper of like, I have a secret." (JPC, 04:34)

3. Royal Lifestyle, Peaches & Population

• The castle is overflowing with peaches and peach products.
  • "Can I offer you a peach? Anybody care for a peach?" (King Mumbles, 05:14)
  • "We just kind of have to do something with them." (King Mumbles, 05:43)
• The castle’s resident count is convoluted due to rotating occupancy.
  • "Some are just Monday, Wednesday, Friday. Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday, room is empty on Sunday." (King Mumbles, 06:05)
• Odd details about dungeon tenants and peach pies on windowsills.

4. Clothes, Conditions, and Kingly Habits

• King Mumbles’s “jacket” is actually just his skin.
  • "What jacket? That's skin, Aaron." (JPC, 06:40)
• King Mumbles has hyperhidrosis:
  • "And you have wet little hands. King if I may." (Adal, 11:09)
  • "Yes, it's a condition unrelated or maybe related to the many illnesses I had as a child. But yes, I do have quite wet hands." (King Mumbles, 11:15)
• He changes into a two-piece silk “daytime” pajama set—humorously dubbed pajamas by the crew.
  • "Can I just say, stunning, two piece silk pajama set." (Adal, 11:34)
  • "These are daytime clothes, my friend." (King Mumbles, 11:42)

5. Revelation: The Crew is From "the Future"

• The hosts reveal themselves as time travelers.
  • "What I should say is that the three of us are from the future." (Adal, 11:49)
  • King Mumbles is skeptical, having dealt with many so-called seers and travelers:
    • "I'm skeptical. You must understand, I have visitors all the time who claim to see things, know things, and I have to suss a lot of nonsense." (King Mumbles, 12:05)
• Attempted predictions fail hilariously.
  • “Adel could probably tell you who won the Super Bowl.” (JPC, 12:36)
  • King Mumbles mishears “SOL” as “Spaniards on lawn”:
    • “In one year, I will have Spaniards on my lawn.” (King Mumbles, 12:47)
    • “Maybe SOL stands for shit out of luck.” (Adal, 12:50)

6. History, Geography, and More Improv

• Banter about Spain, Portugal, and geography misconceptions in the future.
  • “So, do you have a lot of Spaniards on your lawn?” (Adal, 13:00)
  • “They really mellow out. I will tell you.” (Riddle/Adal, 13:08)
• JPC jokes about American confusion over Portugal’s location.
  • “A lot of people will not be able to tell you what continent Portugal is on.” (JPC, 13:39)

7. Riddle & Tomato Tangent

• Riff on the origins of tomatoes and their comparison to peaches.
  • “It’s like a peach you pair with cheese.” (Adal, 14:14)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On King Mumbles's Portraits:

  • "Every year... and they all look sickly, to be honest. So I'm trying out some different poses, just seeing, you know." (King Mumbles, 04:22)

• On Castle Population:

  • "Some are just Monday, Wednesday, Friday... Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday, room is empty on Sunday." (King Mumbles, 06:05)

• On Future Knowledge:

  • "What I should say is that the three of us are from the future." (Adal, 11:49)
  • "In one year, I will have Spaniards on my lawn." (King Mumbles misunderstanding "SOL," 12:47)
  • "Maybe SOL stands for shit out of luck." (Adal, 12:50)

• On American Geography Confusion:

  • "A lot of people will not be able to tell you what continent Portugal is on." (JPC, 13:39)

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Noteworthy Segments with Timestamps

• [01:05] – Introduction to the castle’s odd design choices.
• [02:38] – First meeting with King Mumbles.
• [04:34] – JPC describes King Mumbles’s “portrait pose.”
• [05:14] – The kingdom’s obsession with peaches.
• [06:05] – Explanation of rotating castle residents.
• [11:12] – King’s hyperhidrosis and his wet little hands.
• [11:49] – Crew reveals they are time travelers.
• [12:47] – King Mumbles’s hilarious misunderstanding of “SOL.”
• [13:39] – Geography lessons gone wrong.

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Tone and Style

The episode is casual, absurd, and improv-forward, playing with fantasy tropes and delivering laughs with deadpan character commitment and meta jokes. The back-and-forth is packed with callbacks, side tangents, and supportive “yes, and” energy. The guest’s character (King Mumbles) is given space to shape the worldbuilding, full of quirks and non sequiturs.

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Perfect for Listeners Who…

• Love improvised character comedy
• Appreciate parodies of medieval/fantasy settings
• Want absurd, quick-witted banter with minimal focus on actual riddles
• Enjoy inside jokes about the show’s own premise and comedic meta-commentary

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To continue this delightfully unhinged saga, listen to the full episode on Patreon!

Transcript

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[Aaron]

Damn. I mean, we're in the castle.

[Adel]

This is. Would you say this is like Georgian, Like a Georgian building? Building architecture wise?

[Aaron]

More like Florida.

[Adel]

Okay. I could see it.

[JPC]

Yeah, yeah.

[Adel]

Or like the Charleston wrap around porch.

[Aaron]

Yeah.

[Adel]

Yeah. I've never seen a castle with a porch.

[Riddle]

Like cartoonishly castle to me. I guess it does have all these like peach trees around. It is hot. Georgia.

[Adel]

There's a gazebo.

[Aaron]

Yeah.

[JPC]

And I feel like this is actually.

[Aaron]

I'll say this, the first castle I've ever been in. I've never been in a castle before.

[JPC]

This is like a really cool experience.

[Saving Squirrel]

Congrats.

[Adel]

Wait, we went to Medieval Times, though.

[JPC]

Is that technically lock my whole shit up. That's a castle.

[Adel]

That's a castle.

[Riddle]

Legally on the outside, I guess.

[JPC]

No, it's a castle. It's the only castle in like, what is it, Elgin, Illinois or whatever.

[Riddle]

It's kind of like a petting zoo. Medieval Times is kind of scary, huh?

[Aaron]

Yeah, it's kind of scary.

[JPC]

It's kind of scary the way they treat their horses.

[Aaron]

But we're here. Oh, we're here to see King Mumbles.

[Adel]

We're here to see King.

[Saving Squirrel]

We did it.

[Aaron]

Okay, let's see.

[JPC]

This. There's.

[Aaron]

Okay, so to the left is 341 through 356. And to the right is throne room. So let's do throne room.

[Adel]

Oh, wait, it says throne room. And then in parentheses it says bathroom. So.

[Aaron]

Yeah, that's so confusing. Yeah.

[Riddle]

Okay, this says where the king is. But also ice. I don't know if that's what we need.

[JPC]

And this says live, laugh, love. And it's coffee o'. Clock. I think that the decor in here is all over the place.

[Adel]

Little cheugy castle.

[Riddle]

Confusing.

[Adel]

Well, let's do the. Where the king is.

[JPC]

Yeah.

[Adel]

And then also I could fill up my canteen with ice. Cause ye, my water has run hot. So let's follow this corridor here. Give a polite nod to the guards.

[Aaron]

Oh, okay. Here's. Maybe here's somebody who could help us. Excuse me. Excuse me, sir. We're looking for King Mumbles.

[King Mumbles]

Well, you're looking right at him.

[Adel]

Oh.

[Aaron]

Oh, okay.

[Riddle]

Okay.

[Aaron]

So you.

[Saving Squirrel]

Okay, okay.

[Adel]

I thought. Oh, sorry. I just thought the king would be.

[Narrator]

You guys.

[Riddle]

Don't say anything out loud. Don't say you still have time, Big guy.

[Saving Squirrel]

A big guy.

[King Mumbles]

So I was sick as a child.

[Riddle]

Okay.

[JPC]

That In Seattle. That's why we don't bring that up.

[Aaron]

Question for you. I guess King. And I want to say King Mumbles. Is that. I'm getting that. I'm saying that.

[King Mumbles]

Yes, that's correct.

[Aaron]

Is this a. But I do not mean to be disrespectful at all.

[Riddle]

Jpc. You still have time to not say whatever you're about to say.

[JPC]

Is this an emperor's new clothes thing? Are we supposed to say, like, you have wonderful clothes, or is this a. Like, we caught you in between.

[King Mumbles]

I was going from the throne room to the king's room to the king's room.

[JPC]

Got it.

[Aaron]

Okay, cool. Why don't we.

[Saving Squirrel]

Why don't you.

[King Mumbles]

I wasn't expecting guests.

[Aaron]

Sure.

[King Mumbles]

This part of the. This part of the wing is sort of my territory.

[Aaron]

Got it.

[Adel]

Oh, sorry. Sorry.

[Aaron]

That makes sense because, like, the door's.

[JPC]

Not locked, but I don't, like, lock my, like, bedroom door. You know what I'm saying?

[Aaron]

So.

[JPC]

Yes, totally.

[Riddle]

Well, we don't want to insult, like, guys. We don't have to go on and on about how he gives more, like, sick chimney sweep vibes than Kim King.

[Narrator]

Right.

[Riddle]

You know, we don't need to be saying this stuff out loud to him. Do you know what I mean?

[Aaron]

For sure.

[King Mumbles]

I did fully physically recover on the inside. It's just the outside doesn't look so good. That can't be right.

[JPC]

I think maybe your court wizards may be telling you something, but. Yeah.

[King Mumbles]

Every day.

[Adel]

Well, that's good. Yeah. It's just like. It seems like when we came in, it seems like you were kind of posed. You were on this sort of fainting couch sort of posed towards us. So just seems like you were expecting something. But we can. We can move on.

[King Mumbles]

Oh, it's quite all right. To be completely honest with you. My portrait is coming up. I get a new one every year. And they all look sickly, to be honest. So I'm trying out some different poses, just seeing, you know.

[JPC]

Oh, so this was a pose for a portrait. So you were going to do all fours on the ground, ass pointed up, face turned around with a little whisper of like, I have a secret. That was like, for the royal official.

[Aaron]

Okay.

[King Mumbles]

Is that not.

[Riddle]

No. That will convey strength to the people.

[King Mumbles]

I think it's playful but inviting. And I think it's certainly.

[JPC]

Yeah, it's certainly a new angle. I've saw some of the other portraits in the hall. They're kind of also, you know, kind of like regal, stern, strong chin, kind of like looking off into the distance. So it's definitely telling like a different type of story about like, what, what your kind of like ankle on king is, you know.

[King Mumbles]

Can I offer you a peach? Anybody care for a peach? Peach?

[Saving Squirrel]

I would love one.

[King Mumbles]

Love a peach.

[JPC]

I gotta say, it really depends on where you're gonna be pulling it out of.

[King Mumbles]

Just. Well, we have many peach trees.

[JPC]

Oh, just right off the table.

[Adel]

Yeah, yeah.

[King Mumbles]

It's just the only place they grow in the whole kingdom, so it's kind of special.

[Adel]

And King Mumbles, if I may, we saw that on all the castle windows. There seemed to be sort of peach pies cooling.

[King Mumbles]

Mm.

[Aaron]

Yeah.

[Riddle]

Is that to lure people in?

[King Mumbles]

Oh, no, no, no. We just. We have feasts every night and to be honest, you saw the number of peach trees and very few people live in this castle. So we just kind of have to do something with them.

[JPC]

Got it.

[Adel]

Yeah. All said and done, how many people would you say? How many people would you say live in the castle full time?

[Aaron]

Mm.

[JPC]

Oh, I don't even know what that would mean. Full time living.

[King Mumbles]

Well, some are just Monday, Wednesday, Friday.

[Aaron]

Oh, okay.

[Riddle]

Oh, okay.

[King Mumbles]

Yeah. So I don't know if we're counting those because the same different people sleep in the same room. Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday, room is empty on Sunday.

[Adel]

Right. And then you have the people in the dungeon. It's like, do you count them as long term residents or they, you know?

[King Mumbles]

No, it's mostly short term, unfortunately, if you wind up there.

[Riddle]

Oh, yeah.

[King Mumbles]

But I will say 25. 25 full time.

[Adel]

Very, very good. King.

[Riddle]

King mumbles. Just sort of pulling at your jacket. I never.

[Aaron]

What jacket?

[JPC]

But what jacket?

[Aaron]

That's skin, Aaron. The.

[JPC]

Ooh, stop pulling that.

[King Mumbles]

I should put something on.

[JPC]

Yeah, why don't you?

[Aaron]

Why?

[JPC]

Yeah, why doesn't the king throw something on?

[Aaron]

Yikes.

[Saving Squirrel]

Hi, Aaron. Hi, jpc, it's me, Saving Squirrel Aaron.

[Aaron]

I'll Stomp on it. You just give me the. Yes. The go ahead. The thumbs up, and this thing is gone. No, no.

[Riddle]

Jpc. I think there's something he's trying to say. Wait, wait, wait.

[Aaron]

Foot just hovering over it.

[Riddle]

Wait.

[Saving Squirrel]

I have value. I have value. Do you want to turn your kids in the savers Acorns early, which I represent, makes it easy to teach kids healthy money habits that will stick with them for life.

[Riddle]

You know, Squirrel, I was just thinking about how, like, why don't they teach us more about money in school? Like, I feel like there should be a whole class for it. Because you go to college and you don't. You're dealing with money really, for the first time.

[Saving Squirrel]

Right.

[Riddle]

And you don't know how to do it.

[Saving Squirrel]

Yeah.

[Aaron]

Aaron, don't say go to high school and go to college around the squirrel. It's obvious that this is a guy didn't go to high school and college because he's a squirrel.

[Riddle]

Yeah, he did. Look, he's wearing a little graduation cap.

[Saving Squirrel]

Yeah. Oh, I went to mit.

[Aaron]

I am so sorry, squirrel. But not as sorry as I am about not learning about money when I was younger. Squirrel, let me ask you, do you have a piggy bank?

[Saving Squirrel]

And I should say, MIT stands for Munch into Trees.

[Aaron]

That's what I thought.

[Saving Squirrel]

I do have a piggy bank.

[Aaron]

Well, piggy banks are cute, and they're great for loose quarters, but these days, there's so much more that kids and squirrels need to know about money. Acorns early makes it easy to teach kids lifelong money skills they can actually use in the real world or whatever world you live in. Squirrel.

[Saving Squirrel]

Hmm. Thank you. I'm not. I thought it was the normal world, but I could be wrong.

[Aaron]

Well, let me ask you this. If it's the normal world and your world, does Acorns early have a smart debit card and a money app that grows kids money skills as they grow up?

[Saving Squirrel]

You betcha.

[Aaron]

Okay. And can you start with In App Chores Tracker and teach your kids the.

[JPC]

Value of a dollar?

[Saving Squirrel]

Absolutely.

[Aaron]

Okay.

[Riddle]

And then you let your kids set their own saving goals and start building healthy money habits early?

[Saving Squirrel]

You better believe it. Hmm.

[Aaron]

Okay, so it sounds like we're in the same world.

[Saving Squirrel]

Felt like when I said MIT stands for Munch into trees, we all just kind of glazed over that.

[Narrator]

No, I know.

[Riddle]

It's in Massachusetts. It's a really great school. Kids can spend what they've earned with their very own customizable debit card, giving them that extra sense of independence. Plus, with ACORN early spending limits and real time spend notifications. Parents are always stay in control.

[Aaron]

I've looked through Acorns Early. I am thrilled for when my kid gets old enough that I can use Acorns early and kind of help them manage money. But I've gone through the system. I've gone through the information that exists there although I haven't used it. It's all stuff that I would really recommend and I think that like teaching young kids financial literacy stuff is super, super important. It really just gives them such a leg up for the world that they will have to live in.

[Saving Squirrel]

You better believe it. So take it from Saving Squirrel Ready to teach your kids the smart way to earn, save and spend? Get your first month on us when you head to acorns early.com heyriddle or download the Acorns early app. That's one month free when you sign up at acornserly.com heyriddle Acorns early card is issued by Community Federal Savings Bank Member FDIC pursuant to license by MasterCard International. Free trial for new subscribers only. Subscription fee starting for $5 per month and less. Canceled term [e-mail] earlyterms all right, JPC.

[Riddle]

Let'S go find you a little animal to step on.

[Saving Squirrel]

Water Food.

[McDonald's Announcer]

Smash my leg.

[Aaron]

It was a cartoon.

[McDonald's Announcer]

Mr. Monopoly here. Monopoly is back at McDonald's. Register in the McDonald's app so you're ready to get your bag. Two ways to peel for a chance to get your bag physical peels with select items and digital peels with others. To get your bag, play Monopoly at McDonald's.

[Riddle]

But up, up, up, up.

[McDonald's Legal Voice]

No purchase necessary. See rules at [e-mail] for full details and [e-mail] to play without purchase ends November 23rd. But bonus play ends November 2nd. Monopoly is a registered trademark of Hasbro. Copyright McDonald's.

[Riddle]

King Mumbles I never met a king before. What kind of king are you? Are you like a man of the people? Are you a stern and scary king? What's sort of your vibe?

[King Mumbles]

I would like to say I'm a man of the people, but I feel others would describe me as a recluse.

[Aaron]

So.

[Riddle]

What am I thinking of? I'm thinking of raccoon.

[King Mumbles]

Oh, a raccoon. Possibly. I guess I could. I could see that. I do. A mustache is more whisker like, but.

[Adel]

And you have wet little hands. King if I may.

[King Mumbles]

Hyperhidrosis.

[Saving Squirrel]

Oh, okay.

[King Mumbles]

Yes, it's. It's a condition unrelated or maybe related to the Many illnesses I had as a child. But yes, I do have quite white hands.

[Aaron]

No, because your insides are all healed, so.

[King Mumbles]

Correct. Well, it's the outside of my hands.

[Riddle]

Hyperhydration is just an outside.

[JPC]

Yeah, that's an outside issue.

[King Mumbles]

It's an outside issue.

[JPC]

You're totally right on that, King.

[Adel]

Now that you've put on a stunning. Can I just say, stunning, two piece silk pajama set.

[King Mumbles]

These are daytime clothes, my friend.

[Adel]

My apologies. My apologies. Sorry.

[JPC]

Quite early.

[Adel]

Well, here's. Here's where we can kind of segue. Is that where I'm from, those would be considered pajamas. And what I should say is that the three of us are from the future.

[King Mumbles]

Hmm. The future.

[JPC]

Very muted response to the future.

[King Mumbles]

I'm skeptical. You must understand, I have visitors all the time who claim to see things, know things, and I have to. I have to suss a lot of nonsense and I.

[Adel]

Put us through. Put us through the test, King.

[King Mumbles]

I will. When you say the future, do you mean what. What do you mean by the future?

[Riddle]

Okay, Hard hit question right out of the gate.

[Aaron]

Oh, yeah, no, so that's a great question.

[JPC]

We're kind of.

[Aaron]

We're more from like a very distant future. So if you're going to ask us, like, what's going to happen next year?

[JPC]

We're going to. It's going to be SOL on that. We will not know. But like, Adel could probably tell you who won the Super Bowl.

[King Mumbles]

Spaniards on lawn.

[Riddle]

Yes.

[JPC]

No.

[Adel]

Oh, sorry.

[King Mumbles]

In one year, I will have Spaniards on my lawn.

[Riddle]

No.

[Adel]

Maybe SOL stands for shit out of luck.

[King Mumbles]

Oh, okay.

[Adel]

Where we come from.

[Aaron]

Where we come from.

[Adel]

Yeah.

[Aaron]

Which is the future.

[Adel]

Do you have a lot of Spaniards on your lawn?

[King Mumbles]

Well, I mean, Spain is a threat.

[Adel]

Yeah.

[King Mumbles]

So that's. It's a constant concern. So that's why I was a little.

[Riddle]

You know what? They really mellow out. I will tell you.

[Saving Squirrel]

They do.

[Riddle]

That's the good news.

[King Mumbles]

So good.

[Aaron]

Oh, good.

[Riddle]

Like exploring and I'm a fan.

[King Mumbles]

I'm a. Have you had paella? Yeah, I have delightful, delightful tapas.

[Adel]

Crispy. The little crispy edges on the paella.

[King Mumbles]

Oh, yes, the crispy rice.

[Saving Squirrel]

Oh, yeah.

[Riddle]

Mellow out on the world stage for sure.

[Aaron]

More good news, Portugal.

[JPC]

I know that's probably pretty big right now. Probably not going to be a concern kind of at all.

[King Mumbles]

Oh, oh.

[JPC]

A lot of people get this.

[Aaron]

I.

[JPC]

A lot of people will not be able to tell you what continent Portugal is on.

[Riddle]

Yeah, people will get confused.

[JPC]

I think a lot of people will say South America.

[Riddle]

Yeah.

[Aaron]

Oh, boy. America.

[JPC]

Oh, yeah.

[Riddle]

Oh, right.

[JPC]

I'm just kind of throwing stuff out.

[Adel]

Okay, so some people are going to leave. How did this. What? I don't even know what year it is.

[Riddle]

Here in something something in 42. Columbus sailed the ocean blue.

[JPC]

Oh, something to look forward to.

[Aaron]

Tomatoes?

[King Mumbles]

Don't know. Okay, I agree.

[Riddle]

No reaction. But why would he?

[JPC]

Yeah, why would he?

[King Mumbles]

What you mean?

[Saving Squirrel]

It's like a peach that.

[Adel]

Oh, it's like a peach that you pair with cheese.

[Aaron]

Oh, yeah, like, more like a.

[Riddle]

Would you describe a tomato like that?

[Aaron]

Huh?

[Riddle]

When I describe a tomato like that? Huh?

[Aaron]

1, 2, 3, 4.

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[JPC]

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[Aaron]

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[JPC]

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[Aaron]

You go.

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