Patreon Preview #350: The Beak & Bones Society

Summary

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Hey Riddle Riddle – Patreon Preview #350: The Beak & Bones Society

Release Date: November 21, 2025
Hosts: Adal Rifai, Erin Keif, John Patrick Coan (JPC)
Main Theme:
This episode is an improv-heavy, comedic journey as the hosts attempt to infiltrate a (fictional) secret society known as "The Beak & Bones Society." The gang navigates absurd initiation rituals, personal anxieties, and classic riddle-adjacent shenanigans, blurring the line between parody mystery, improv comedy, and light puzzle play.

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Episode Overview

The hosts find themselves stumbling into the world of secret societies—specifically "The Beak & Bones Society"—where getting accepted is harder than it sounds, especially when you're distracted by tuna cans, grievances of rejection, and debates over who qualifies as a "Kyle." Their signature blend of improv, meta-commentary, and self-deprecating wit drives a loose, playful narrative.

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Key Discussion Points & Improv Segments

1. Pre-Society Anxieties and Rejections

• Erin, Adal, and JPC discuss their lack of experience with secret societies and anxieties about being rejected.
  • Erin (06:44): “I’ve never been in a secret society before. Or a club really. And I’m just scared you guys are going to be let in and not me.”
  • JPC proposes a "package deal" for the society: all three join, or none.

2. Gaining Entry to The Beak & Bones Society

• The hosts strategize how to enter, with Erin humorously worried about deleting a tweet (06:08).
• They are welcomed by the Grand Raven (Adal as character), but Erin bungles their entrance by loudly dropping a tuna can—a recurring bit.
  • Erin (07:57): “The tuna can. It was in my back pocket. I forgot it was there.”
  • Grand Raven (Adal) (08:03): “Did someone drop something? That stinks.”

3. Escalating Absurdity – Tuna Can Fiasco

• Erin tries to deflect suspicion for the tuna can, blaming another society member, who is quickly ejected, possibly “to death” (09:02).
• Running jokes about having more than one tuna can and disowning responsibility are layered throughout the segment.

4. Secret Society Ritual Weirdness

• The induction grows stranger: odd password moments, lights going on and off, and the ceremony derailed by both chaos and confusion.
  • Adal (10:07): “It’s been a lifelong dream to be in Beak and Bones, sir. The best avian themed secret Club this side of the Mississippi.”
  • Grand Raven and members provide dry, comedic responses, treating the process as a matter of utmost gravity.
• Ongoing lampooning of the exclusivity and odd traditions of secret societies.

5. Who’s a Kyle?

• The society seems filled with people named “Kyle”; Erin is mistaken for Kyle, and a tangent on the existence of women named Kyle ensues, including Real Housewives references.
  • JPC (10:28): “I’ve always wanted to meet a woman Kyle.”
  • Adal (Grand Raven) (10:37): “Most of the women Kyles are Kylies.”

6. Splitting Up & Alternate Societies

• Members are randomly pulled into groupings; John Patrick Coan is ushered to a different room, while Erin ends up talking with people who run a "Kyle XY" recap podcast (13:37).
  • Kyle (character, JPC) (13:35): “We do a Kylexy recap podcast. Fun format: I have seen every episode. Alan never has and never retains information about it. Groundhog Day meets Kyle XY.”
  • Erin agrees to leave a five-star review but admits she doesn’t listen to podcasts (14:16).

7. Nepo Babies, Legacies, and Ritual Disrobing

• A quick debate ensues over who is a “nepo baby” versus “legacy” member of the society, with comically convoluted distinctions.
  • Adal (14:49): “Then why even bring it up, though? Know what I mean?”
• JPC is instructed to “shed his clothes and lay down in the nest,” resulting in more confusion and embarrassment; the group tries to cover him up.
  • Adal (15:25): “Whoa. What is going on with that tattoo?”
  • JPC (15:32): “Not a tattoo. It’s actually a birthmark. Yeah, the doctor slapped my little hiney so hard when I came out.”

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Erin (11:08): “Well, Kyle, turn the lights off when—”
• JPC (JPC as moving society member) (11:10): “I say Dr. Christmas Jones. Two people grabbed me and ushered me into a different room.”
• Adal (Grand Raven) (12:28): “Let it be known, Kyle, take note. It’s all or nothing for these three. For the two and for the two.” (Indicating confusion and chaotic rules.)
• Erin (13:37): “Oh, a pod.” (After being invited to join the Kyle XY podcast.)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 06:08 – 07:22: The group discusses membership anxieties, podcast as a package deal.
• 07:23 – 09:09: Enacting entry, tuna can mishaps, Grand Raven's sternness and the ejection of a non-guilty member.
• 10:07 – 11:08: Formal requests to join, society lore, and avian themes.
• 11:09 – 13:15: Gendered naming tangents, more ejections, and group splintering.
• 13:37 – 15:00: Conversation with "Kyle XY" podcasters, industry nepo/legacy distinctions.
• 15:10 – 15:54: JPC’s ritual disrobing, body marks, absurd ceremony climax.

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Tone & Style

True to Hey Riddle Riddle’s style, the episode is dominated by playful, rapid-fire improvisational banter. The tone is irreverent, silly, and intentionally chaotic, mocking secret societies by heightening their most arcane traditions to absurd levels.

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For Listeners New and Old

Even for those unfamiliar with the show, this episode delivers a wild, imaginative narrative fueled by improv and running jokes. The lack of straightforward riddles is part of the fun—expect off-the-wall transitions, meta-commentary on podcasting, and enthusiastic riffing on everything from club memberships to '90s TV deep cuts.

Note: The episode, being a Patreon bonus preview, ends mid-ceremony with a classic, tongue-in-cheek call to action for listeners to subscribe for the full chaotic adventure.

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Transcript

[A]

Whoa, guys, that recording was crazy. We played all sorts of characters and my brain's like, we. Whoa. We. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. I need to find a way to unwind. What to do, what to do, what to do.

[B]

Aaron, you are not wrong. That last recording that we did for the podcast. Hey, Riddle. Riddle. Was a doozy.

[C]

Oh, yeah, I sort of. I sort of like, tweaked my back playing Kung Fu Shrimp. Remember that character Kung Fu Shrimp? I sort of threw my back out. So I'm looking for, like, a natural way to, like, relieve aches and discomfort. You know, I'm not as young as I once was, but yeah, maybe. Oh, maybe like cornbread hemp CBD gummies, right? I feel like that's been a huge piece of my wellness plan recently.

[A]

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[C]

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[B]

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[A]

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[B]

D, D, L E. Don't just take it from us. Take it from. What is it? Kung Fu shrimp.

[C]

Hello, I'm Kung Fu Shrimp. Everyone, let's chop these boards.

[A]

Adel, you're gonna really hurt yourself.

[C]

The surfboards.

[B]

Dedede. There we go. Oh, his back. Oh, his back.

[C]

Give me another gummy. Another gummy, please.

[B]

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[D]

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[B]

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[C]

All right, guys, it's just Dee Dee Dee Dee dee. Oh, hey, friends. Sorry about all the legs you're seeing. I just became a Rockette. Ooh.

[B]

Adol your dream.

[C]

I know they said I wasn't tall enough, but I am. And now I'm making all that Rockette money.

[A]

Ooh. Well, Adol, I'll be able to afford to go see you because I've Been saving so much money using Rocket Money. Oh, my gosh, that's so funny. Yeah, kind of like what you just said.

[B]

Oh, okay. So Adol has been making a lot of Rockette money, and Aaron is using Rocket Money, which is a personal finance app that helps you find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings. This all tracks.

[A]

Mm. Rocket Money will even try to negotiate lower bills for you. The app automatically scans your bills to find opportunities to save and then goes to work to get you better deals. They'll even talk to customer service so you don't have to. It's like having a little assistant in your pocket.

[C]

And Rocket Money has saved leggy users like myself over $2.5 billion, including over 880 million in canceled subscriptions alone. Their 10 million members save up to $740 a year when they use all of the app's premium features.

[B]

And Adol, I know that Rocket Money will even try to negotiate lower bills for you. The app automatically scans your bills to find opportunities to save them, and then goes to work to get you better deals. They'll even talk to customer service so you don't have to. But Rockette Money. What other songs do the Rockettes Come and dance? To.

[C]

Cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket money, go to Rocketmoney.com Riddle that's Rocketmoney.com Riddle Rocketmoney.com Riddle Dee Dee Dee dee dee.

[B]

Stretch.

[A]

Stretch first. Stretch one side. Just stretch first.

[B]

Oh. Oh.

[C]

I pulled my leg. I pulled it so hard.

[A]

As you can see, I'm on the couch. My feet are up. I'm on my phone, I'm drinking a Mai Tai. Gentlemen, I'm actually done with my Christmas shopping, so I don't need to go with you today.

[C]

Oh, that's my couch. And you spilled a lot of Mai Tai on it.

[A]

I know. I got everyone an aura frame for Christmas, so, yeah, I'm actually all done. Did a perfect job.

[B]

Yeah, we were actually going to shop for Adol's new couch today. Because you keep spilling Mai Tais.

[A]

We're all saying the same thing.

[C]

Well, wait, jpc. Sorry, Aaron, did you say an aura frame?

[A]

Mm.

[C]

I am obsessed with aura frames. They're the perfect gift for anyone in your life. I have my own. I also gave my mom one. And they have a really cool thing where you can share photos to each other's frames and we have such a laugh just dropping in fun little photos.

[B]

You can honestly also Preload photos before it even ships and you can keep adding them from anywhere, anytime. I love it because I can always send up to date photos of my child to my family members.

[C]

Aura frames and preloaded photos can still make you happy.

[B]

For a limited time, visit auraframes.com and get $45 off or as best selling Carver Mat frames named number one by Wirecutter by using promo code RIDDLE at checkout. That's auraframes a u r a frames.com promo code RIDDLE. This exclusive black Friday Cyber Monday deal is their best of the year, so order now before it ends, support our show by mentioning us at checkout. Terms and conditions apply.

[A]

Take a photo of me drinking a Mai Tai on Adoles couch and then put it on the aura frame.

[C]

Aww.

[B]

This is actually for evidence, Aaron.

[A]

Oh, good cheese.

[C]

About two minutes till midnight. So when we get in there, just.

[B]

Remember.

[C]

Just remember that I'm the one. So my cousin was a Beacon Bones member and so he's the one who got us this chance to join the society. But remember, it's a secret society, so you can't tell anyone about tonight. Be cool. Don't be weird.

[A]

Unrelated, how do you delete a tweet and a thread?

[C]

I know how to delete an X. I don't know how to delete a tweet, Aaron.

[A]

Okay, well then fine, I'll just leave it. No one's on there anymore, so I'll just leave it.

[B]

If it's secret, how did you find out your cousin was in it? Do you get like a limited invite? Like a limited number of invites? Like it's secret. Obviously it's secret, but like, it's like Raya. Oh, great. So like once I'm on, I can clever wink. Yeah, wink. Have to assume wink and adult.

[A]

I, I, I'm excited. I just feel like I've already been feeling like really rejected lately. Like I've never been in a secret society before. Or a club really. And I'm just scared that you guys are going to be let in and not me.

[C]

Oh, we, I mean, we could maybe say something up top of like, it's all three of us or nobody, can we please?

[B]

I was under the impression that we were doing this as a podcast. It was like a package deal. Are we all applying for individual membership into the Beacon Bone Society?

[C]

That's how it usually goes. I mean, think of like Freemasons or like the Odd Fellows.

[B]

Like, well, fuck, I don't want to do that. I don't want to be in if you guys Aren't going to be in. Can you cancel?

[A]

Are you being sarcastic? No.

[C]

Guys, it's midnight. We got it. We got to get inside. We gotta get inside.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Is there a special password? Do we knock?

[C]

Yes. One second cousin. Oh, the door opened.

[A]

Oh.

[C]

Welcome. Welcome in. Please stand in the grand hall, for I am the Grand Raven, the leader of Beacon Bones.

[A]

Oh, I dropped a can. I dropped the can and it's echoing.

[C]

What was that? Aaron, what are you doing? What did you drop?

[A]

The tuna can. It was in my back pocket. I forgot I was there.

[C]

Did someone drop something? That stinks.

[A]

Clang.

[B]

An open. Was it an open tuna can? What do you mean you forgot about it?

[A]

I was eating tuna with my hands on my walk here, and then I put it in my back pocket and it clanged on the ground.

[C]

Ten seconds into, like, the big intro.

[A]

For the night, I kicked the tuna can a little bit over, so it's in front of another guy.

[B]

You put an open. An open tuna can into your pocket?

[C]

I'm hearing a lot of chatter.

[A]

Fuck.

[C]

Aaron, please.

[B]

Sorry.

[A]

I kicked the Tunic Clan.

[B]

That.

[A]

He's gonna think it's that guy. Shh, shh, shh, shh.

[B]

Guys, just.

[C]

Who dropped the can? Was it you? Was it you?

[A]

Not, not me. That guy right over there.

[C]

You.

[A]

Out. Out. Oh, God. I'm just another guy that's getting thrown out. I didn't drop the kuna. I'm allergic to fish.

[C]

He will not be a Beacon Bones.

[B]

Whoa. They wrenched his arm and they kicked him out.

[C]

Yeah, they tugged at his shirt pretty hard.

[A]

Did they kill that guy?

[C]

He might be dead. They tugged his shirt so hard, you'd.

[B]

Have to tug somebody's shirt really hard to kill them.

[C]

Sorry about the long gaps in between me talking again. I am the Grand Raven and tonight shall be unlike any other night.

[B]

You've got 200 people here.

[C]

Is someone talking You?

[B]

Well, I start clapping. Clap.

[C]

Good job, man. Hey, good job. Yeah, it's a different generation, Kyle. Turn out the lights.

[B]

Like six people in the group start moving to go. Turn out the lights.

[A]

Ah, spooky stuff. Lots of Kyle's here.

[C]

Lots of Kyle's here. Are you a Kyle?

[B]

Oh, Aaron. He's pointing right to you.

[A]

Oh, my God.

[C]

Sorry. The light. Turn the lights on.

[A]

Another can of tuna falls out of my work back pocket. Clangs. I take it over to another guy. No, my name's Aaron. Aaron. My name's Aaron.

[C]

Aaron.

[A]

And it's been a lifelong dream to be in Beak and Bones, sir.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

The best avian themed secret Club this side of the Mississippi.

[C]

Thank you. Yes. Those hollow bones. They do not know how to run a secret society.

[A]

They don't know. Those hollow bone guys. Don't get it, huh?

[B]

In Sir Ife, I've always wanted to meet a woman, Kyle.

[C]

Huh?

[B]

I've heard that was an option. I've just never met one.

[C]

Oh, well, yeah, most of the women Kyle's are Kylie's.

[B]

Yeah, I know. Whoa.

[A]

But there's Kyle Richards on the Real Housewives.

[B]

Yeah, so there are. There are female. There are women Kyle's. And so I've always.

[A]

Don't correct him.

[B]

You want me to say that Denise Richards is on the.

[C]

Oh, what was her name in the Bond movies?

[B]

It was like, oh, Leggy Christmas Christmas Jones.

[C]

So weird.

[A]

Yeah, that is weird.

[C]

Well, Kyle, turn the lights off when.

[B]

I say Dr. Christmas Jones. Two people grabbed me and ushered me into a different room.

[C]

Oh my gosh.

[A]

What is it?

[C]

Oh, jpc.

[B]

I don't think I'm being thrown out. Guys find me.

[A]

I reach at him and sort of try to grasp, but he's gone. Mr. Head Grand Raven. Grand Raven.

[C]

Sort of hard to remember a name when the sort of up top work was talked over, huh?

[A]

Yeah, a lot of people were pretty rude. Yeah, a lot of people were pretty rude with all that tuna business.

[C]

Hard to build a house on a shaky foundation, right?

[A]

Totally. Grand Raven. Sir, we are a but a humble podcast. We are but three.

[C]

You're not recording, are you?

[A]

No, of course not. Of course not. We would never do that without having you sign sort of a release. We would like to be a part of the society, but we would like to do it together, sir. So no disrespect if you end up going in a different direction, but we want to sort of. Actually, Adel and I would like to stick together. JPC would be a fun bonus, but.

[C]

If he asks, we'd settle them.

[A]

Yeah, exactly.

[C]

Let it be known. Kyle, take note. It's all or nothing for these three. For the two and for the two.

[A]

And then the third is like hypothetically would be nice, but not 100% necessary.

[C]

Aaron, I'm being dragged to a different room.

[A]

Adelaide, you didn't even say anything.

[C]

Tell my story.

[A]

I don't remember it. I forgot to ask what his story was. I'm a really bad friend and a really bad listener. Oh, what was his story?

[B]

Hey, do you want to join our group? Oh, hi, yeah. Young woman, I'm sorry, yeah, I missed your name. Kyle.

[A]

No, it's Aaron.

[B]

Oh, I'm sorry, I'm Kyle.

[A]

Oh, hi, Kyle. Yeah, I was sort of hoping I'd be dragged off to a different room. This sort of feels like I'm with. I don't want to be with the rejects in the main space.

[B]

I mean, most of us, the majority of us are in the main space.

[A]

Right. But I feel like, you know, in, like, sleep no more. Some people get a special treatment where they get, like, pulled onto an elevator with a woman. They get their own little special experience. Like, I'm going to sort of hold out for that.

[B]

No. Okay. Well, I just heard that you say you were with a podcast. My friend and I are also with a podcast.

[A]

Oh, a pod.

[B]

We do a Kylexy recap podcast. It's kind of a fun format. I am a person who has seen every episode of Kylexy, and this is my co host, Alan. And Alan, I walk over to a.

[A]

Chalkboard that says, it's been eight days since we've mentioned Kyle XY on the podcast, and I erase it and say, zero.

[B]

Alan is my, like, comedy partner. Like, old comedy partner when we used to do comedy. And he has never heard of Kyle XY and what is it again? Doesn't retain any information about Kyle xy. So it's like a. It's like a. Yeah, it's like a.

[C]

Groundhog Day meets Kyle xy.

[B]

What is. It's called Kyle Y. Hogs Day.

[A]

Great. I don't really listen to podcasts, but I'll give it a five star review.

[B]

Whoa. No. Yeah, we're kind of inviting you if you want to, like, be in on our thing. Like, we're. We're gonna be. We're gonna be beacon bones.

[A]

I'm gonna sit down. Crisscross.

[B]

Alan's dad was beacon bones. I know we're not supposed to say, but Alan's dad was beacon bones. So we're kind of like.

[A]

Oh, Nepo. Nepo. Okay, cool. Yeah, I'll. I'll latch on to a.

[C]

Well, not Nepo. Sorry, not Nepo.

[A]

Oh, brother.

[C]

Just so happens that I call I probably qualify to also be.

[A]

Oh, of course. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

And they're in different industries.

[A]

Then. Why even bring it up, though? Know what I mean?

[B]

No, he's a legacy. He's not. It's. It's different from Nepo. Nepo is same industry. Legacy is. He's legacy.

[A]

Of course.

[C]

Welcome. John Patrick Cohen. Please shed your clothes.

[B]

Way ahead of you.

[A]

Shed your clothes.

[C]

Shed your clothes and lay down in the nest.

[B]

Do I put him here in this paper shutter or.

[A]

Whoa. What is going on with that tattoo.

[B]

Oh, you have a discerning eye.

[C]

Tell us the backstory.

[B]

Not a tattoo. It's actually a birthmark. Yeah, the doctor slapped my little hiney so hard when I came out.

[A]

Put your clothes back on.

[B]

I've already shedded them. I've already put them in this shedder.

[A]

Yeah, I'm gonna can them to you. Put something on.

[B]

Well, they're shedded. They're in tatters.

[A]

Can we get him a sheet or something?

[C]

Let's get him like a blanket or something.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

1, 2, 3, 4.

[A]

Hey, Riddle.

[B]

Riddle's Clue crew, listen to the rest of the episode now by starting your free 7 day trial at patreon.com heyriddle Riddle.

[D]

What's going on? It's Lamorne Morris and Hannah Simone and we host the Mess Around a New Girl. Rewatch PODC Headgum. Now, here's the thing. Every single week, we chat about an episode of New Girl and we really get into it. Like, we get up in there. We get up in there. You know, we reminisce about our times on set. We share behind the scenes tea. We react to rewatching episodes that we haven't seen in years. We talk about how Jake Johnson is dog.

[E]

That's not true. We talk about so many memories we have of working with the biggest stars on the planet. I'm talking Prince Taylor Swift, Olivia Rodrigo.

[D]

We're just two BFFs having a good old time.

[C]

Okay?

[D]

Sometimes we even talk to other co stars like Zooey Deschanel, Jake Johnson, Max Greenfield, and Damon Waynes Jr. And your dad. We talked to your dad on this show as well.

[E]

Make sure you subscribe to the Mess around wherever you get your podcasts. New episodes drop every single Tuesday.