History Extra Podcast: “I am to flirt my last”: Jane Austen’s Twenties

Date: December 21, 2025
Host: Lauren Good
Guest: Dr. Lizzie Rogers (historian of the 18th and early 19th centuries)

Overview

In this episode—the second in a four-part series on Jane Austen—host Lauren Good and historian Dr. Lizzie Rogers delve into Austen’s dramatic and formative twenties. The discussion covers her flirtations, creative milestones, proposals, and significant personal upheavals, arguing against the long-held myth that Austen’s life was dull compared to her novels. The episode uncovers Austen’s joys, heartbreaks, and the roots of her iconic works.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Real Jane: Beyond the Image

• Jane as a Vibrant, Social Young Woman:
  Despite stereotypes, Austen in her twenties was sociable, witty, and enjoyed society.
  • Dr. Lizzie Rogers (03:51): “She clearly loved to flirt, she loved to have a good time. She’s 20 years old, she’s poised to have a great crush and have this kind of time flirting at a ball and really enjoy herself.”

2. The Tom Lefroy Affair: Flirtations and Real-Life Romance

• Meeting Tom Lefroy at Steventon ([02:41]–[08:17]):

  • Tom Lefroy, nephew of Jane’s neighbour and friend Madame Lefroy, arrived during Christmas 1795, causing excitement in the Austen household.
  • Their relationship, recorded in Jane’s surviving letters, has been subject to much speculation.
  • Reference to the film Becoming Jane, discussing how fact and fiction intermingle in the popular imagination.
    • Lauren Good (03:32): “One of my absolute favorite films about Jane is 'Becoming Jane'... James McAvoy playing a very brooding Tom Lefroy is incredible.”
    • Dr. Lizzie Rogers (04:13): “Jane Austen didn’t need to have a great romance in her life to write a great romance…but when you read her letters, she clearly loved to flirt, she loved to have a good time.”

• Anticipation of a Proposal and the ‘White Coat’ Letter:

  • Jane joked about an expected proposal, referencing Lefroy’s white coat and her intention to reject him unless he “promises to give away his white coat.”
    • Lauren Good (04:56): “There is a bit of humor there, but she... seems she’s expecting an offer of marriage here.”
    • Dr. Lizzie Rogers (05:13): “These letters have been read both ways... whether she did truly expect a proposal, or whether she knew nothing would come of it, or whether he’s the one that got away, I don’t know.”

• The End of the Affair:

  • Jane writes, "I am to flirt my last with Tom Lefroy," reflecting either heartbreak or her trademark wit.
    • Lauren Good (08:17): “She writes in another letter... I am to flirt my last with Tom Lefroy... She seems pretty heartbroken at this stage.”
    • Dr. Lizzie Rogers (08:35): “You read that and your heart breaks for her a little bit... It’s hard not to think there’s something behind that.”
  • Lefroy likely pressured by his family due to money concerns; later becomes Lord Chief Justice of Ireland, though history remembers him best for Jane.

3. Writing Milestones:

• First Impressions, Sense and Sensibility, and Early Literary Ambitions ([10:21]–[12:48]):

  • Shortly after the Lefroy episode, Jane begins First Impressions (later Pride and Prejudice), and revises Eleanor and Marianne (early Sense and Sensibility).
    • Lauren Good (10:37): “Do you think there were influences there from her romance with Tom?”
    • Dr. Lizzie Rogers (10:37): “It’d be hard not to be, wouldn’t it?... But she didn’t have to experience everything to write about it... she had such a great imagination.”

• Family Support and Early Setbacks:

  • Her father submits First Impressions to a publisher; it’s rejected but Jane isn’t deterred.
    • Dr. Lizzie Rogers (12:13): “We’re pretty sure she did know... it also seems like it didn’t discourage her too much.”

• Working on ‘Susan’ (Early Northanger Abbey)

  • Jane actively writes and revises multiple works, demonstrating discipline and literary ambition.

4. The Move to Bath: Upheaval and Change

• Relocation After Father’s Retirement ([13:03]–[16:36]):

  • In 1801, Austen’s father retires and the family moves to Bath. Dr. Rogers notes the move as both exciting and destabilizing.
  • Jane’s productivity declines, but Bath features conspicuously in later works, such as Northanger Abbey and Persuasion, raising questions about her feelings for the city.
    • Dr. Lizzie Rogers (13:26): “It’s the age-old question... Did Jane like Bath? ...She probably hated it at times, probably loved it at times, but it did leave a lasting impression.”

• Visits to Devon and the “Unknown Suitor”

  • Stories persist of Jane meeting an unnamed ‘great love’ by the sea who died before anything could develop—a mystery noted in family lore.

5. Marriage Proposal from Harris Bigg-Wither

• Proposal and Rejection ([21:26]–[24:50]):

  • In 1802, Jane briefly accepts a proposal from family friend Harris Bigg-Wither—significant for financial security, despite little personal attachment.

    • Dr. Lizzie Rogers (21:39): “He was quite an awkward young man... but he did offer great prospects...”

  • Jane withdraws her acceptance by morning, remaining unmarried.

    • Dr. Lizzie Rogers (23:59): “I presume [she] spent quite a sleepless night thinking about it and woke up... and retracted her acceptance...”

• Discussion of Social Pressure & the Realities Facing Georgian Women:

  • Referencing both Jane and her sister Cassandra’s experiences, and the risks of marriage and childbirth in the era.
    • Dr. Lizzie Rogers (23:30): "I think so... look at her novels. It's mentioned so many times... to be a spinster is the worst thing ever, which isn't necessarily true if you have the means to not marry."
    • Dr. Lizzie Rogers (26:49): “She’d seen... many difficult births... perhaps that also put her off. Surely it couldn't have been a grand advertisement for marriage.”

6. The Lost Manuscript: Publishing Woes with ‘Susan’

• Submission and Long Delay ([28:36]–[30:09]):

  • Jane’s brother Henry submits Susan to Crosby & Co., who purchase it but never publish. Jane, using the clever pseudonym “Mrs. Ashton Dennis” (MAD), tries in vain to reclaim it.

    • Dr. Lizzie Rogers (29:00): “They advertise the novel as forthcoming, but it never gets published... she can't afford the £10... it had been sat in publishing limbo for so long.”
    • Lauren Good (30:01): “I love that pseudonym of mad. That seems incredible...”

  • Susan, eventually retitled Northanger Abbey, is only published posthumously.

7. Loss and Instability: The Death of Mr. Austen

• Father's Death and Financial Challenges ([30:37]–[32:59]):

  • In 1805, Mr. Austen’s sudden death triggers insecurity for the Austen women, who must rely on the support of Jane's brothers.

    • Dr. Lizzie Rogers (31:26): “He was their financial security... now having to rely on... support of her brothers, who have their own wives and families...”

  • Jane’s resulting years are marked by frequent moves and financial dependence—yet she retains social and familial influence.

8. Reflecting on Her Twenties

• A Decade of Growth, Setback, and Resolve ([33:16]–[34:22]):
  • Jane’s twenties are a period of experimentation—both socially (with flirtations, brief engagements) and creatively (completing early novel drafts, seeking publication).
    • Dr. Lizzie Rogers (33:16): “Her twenties... were really significant... She really refined her writing. She completed some novels. She’d had a book accepted for publishing. Even though it never comes to fruition, she knows she’s good enough... she has a lot of exciting things happening.”

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Flirtation and Wit:
  • “She clearly loved to flirt, she loved to have a good time.”
    — Dr. Lizzie Rogers ([03:51])
• On the Tom Lefroy ‘Great Romance’ Legend:
  • “I’m always reticent to be like, ‘he’s her great love’, because she’s young and, you know, we’ve all been there...”
    — Dr. Lizzie Rogers ([06:13])
• On the End of the Lefroy Affair:
  • “At length the day has come on which I am to flirt my last with Tom Lefroy. My tears as I write at the melancholy idea.”
    — Jane Austen, via Lauren Good ([08:17])
• On the Perils of Publishing:
  • “She ends up sending lots of letters... written as Mrs. Ashton Dennis—the acronym is MAD, which I think is so clever...”
    — Dr. Lizzie Rogers ([29:17])
• On Marriage and Gender Realities:
  • “Jane certainly didn’t have great means independently.”
    — Dr. Lizzie Rogers ([23:51])
• On Women’s Ambitions:
  • “No matter how ambitious or talented you are as a woman in the Georgian period... you are reliant on the men around you.”
    — Lauren Good ([32:44])
• On Social Resilience:
  • “She has this really interesting social independence about her... a powerful presence amongst her family, amongst her friends.”
    — Dr. Lizzie Rogers ([34:00])

Timestamps for Important Segments

• [02:41] — Introduction to Tom Lefroy and romantic rumors
• [04:56] — The ‘white coat’ letter and speculation about a proposal
• [08:17] — Jane’s farewell to Lefroy (“flirt my last”)
• [10:21] — Writing 'First Impressions' and influences from romance
• [12:13] — Family’s support and First Impressions rejection
• [13:03] — Austen family’s move to Bath and its mixed impact
• [17:20] — Mystery ‘lost love’ in Devon
• [21:26] — Harris Bigg-Wither proposal: acceptance and rejection
• [23:30] — Pressures of marriage and singlehood for Georgian women
• [28:36] — The saga of 'Susan' and Jane's "MAD" pseudonym
• [30:37] — Mr. Austen’s death and its impact
• [33:16] — Summary of Austen’s twenties: turmoil, growth, and ambition

Summary

Jane Austen's twenties were a crucible of personal evolution and creative ambition. She experienced social pleasures, heartbreak, the anxiety and opportunity of proposals, familial upheaval, and repeated frustrations with the publishing world. Not simply a “quiet maiden aunt,” Austen emerges as witty, resilient, and deeply engaged with the world around her. These years—full of flirtation, rejection, and upheaval—laid the groundwork for her eventual triumph as one of England’s greatest novelists.