Holmberg's Morning Sickness – January 6, 2026
Episode Overview
In this engaging episode, John Holmberg and the crew delve into two main topics: the recent fatal mountain lion attack in Colorado (and the recurring human reaction to wild animal attacks), and the fallout from a Philadelphia Flyers play-by-play announcer’s hot mic slip. The discussion spirals into humorous, irreverent speculation about humans as food in the animal kingdom, riffing on cannibalism, zoo practices, and personal anecdotes. There’s also sharp commentary on media apology culture and some signature off-the-cuff banter among the hosts.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. Mountain Lion Attack in Colorado: Are Humans Just Tasty Prey?
[03:37–16:04]
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Story Recap:
The cast discusses a news story where a solo hiker was fatally attacked by mountain lions in Colorado; two of the big cats were killed, and authorities are searching for a third.- Evidence included human DNA found on one lion's paws.
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Human Taste Debate:
The hosts riff on the often-repeated justification that animals "develop a taste for human flesh," which prompts in-depth (and comedic) curiosity about how "good" humans really taste to predators.- “How good are we?” – John Holmberg [05:46]
- “If we have to stuff that takes a bite of us, because simply one bite turns you into a fan…” – John [06:10]
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Generational Learning in Animals:
Brady raises the point that mountain lions could teach offspring that humans are easy prey.- “It could be teaching the offspring…generationally passed down.” – Brady [05:46]
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Who’s to Blame – Human or Animal?
John critiques the American impulse to immediately kill predatory animals when an attack occurs, instead suggesting:- “No, we don’t [kill the animals]. You have to be smarter. When you’re walking around in the woods, you don’t kill the animals.” – John [06:03]
- “If you love nature, know the risk you’re taking.” – John [06:51]
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Delightful Hypotheticals:
The group jokes about mountain lions seeing humans as easy, tasty, defenseless prey and how the “taste for man” trope flatters human arrogance.- “It's my last meal. That's delicious.” – John as mountain lion [09:21]
- “We are delightful. And all those stories do is make me curious how good we are.” – John [15:44]
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Cannibal Curiosity & Pop Culture:
Jokes about cannibal tribes, what humans taste like ("has anyone asked Dahmer?"), and Ricky Gervais' suggestion that humans give their bodies as animal food after death.- “Why can't we go to the zoo and let all these corpses be zoo food?” – John [16:24]
Memorable Moment
- “I saw this last night on the news…and the only thing that happens when I see these stories is, man, I want to take a bite of a human being and just see what this is about.” – John [03:22]
2. Animal-Eat-Human Tales and Cannibalism Satire
[16:04–22:29]
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Pet Euthanasia Tributes:
John shares listener emails about the loss of beloved pets and thanks their euthanasia vet, briefly touching on the difficulty and relief of the process. [01:15–03:16] -
Animals Consuming Deceased Owners:
- Cats vs. Dogs: Cats will eat their owners almost immediately if left alone, dogs wait longer. [18:01–18:34]
- Brady tells a story about monitor lizards eating their deceased owner. [19:08–19:57]
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If HMS Staff Were a Buffet:
Irreverent, dark discussion about which show staffer would be tastiest if they were cannibalized, updated with culinary justifications.- “Brady would be so good…you are Wagyu, my man.” – John [17:52]
- “Of everybody in this building, you're one. And there's a far drop off to how good second would be.” – John [21:13]
3. Critique of Animal Control, Media, and Data
[13:12–15:44]
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Skepticism About Animal Counts & Media Reporting:
The gang mocks the accuracy of wildlife population tracking (mountain lions, gorillas), referencing CNN’s “suddenly found” gorilla populations.- “How in the world do they know we got a census on mountain lions? I don't believe that either.” – John [13:16]
- “We’re lousy with gorillas.” – John [13:54]
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Double Standards and Apology Culture:
Ties into the later discussion of sports broadcaster mishaps, with John narrating how public-facing apologies (e.g., sensitivity training) are mostly performative, not substantive.- “It’s all lies. Every time you see that stuff…Nobody's ever gone to sensitivity training. No, it's never happened.” – John [26:20]
4. Flyers Announcer Hot Mic Incident
[24:46–29:57, 34:55–38:53]
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Incident Recap:
A Philadelphia Flyers play-by-play guy was caught on air saying, “while you’re down there, would you mind blowing me?” between periods, thinking he was off the air.- “If you’re gonna go down there, you might as well blow me.” – Flyers Announcer (clip) [34:57]
- John notes the announcer was suspended for two days.
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Media Overreaction & Real Adult Life:
John and the crew argue that the producer was at fault for leaving the mics on and that adults should be able to handle such slips in context.- “And we can handle that as adults, can't we? Did anyone get hurt by that?” – John [25:28]
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Parallel to Personal Antics:
John tells a story of being pranked by Brady at a wedding—face in crotch during a solemn moment—emphasizing how off-air banter is full of inappropriate jokes among men.- “There is no microphone there” – Brady [26:49]
- “Should Brady have not come to work for two days because that opportunity arose? Absolutely not. You should have gotten a medal…” – John [29:28]
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Bantering About Sports, Sensitivity, and Philly:
Jokes about sports fans' sensibility, Philadelphia’s rough-and-tumble image, and broadcasters’ inner lives.- “If someone doesn't say, why don't you blow me?...it's on the signs. Welcome to Philadelphia.” – John [30:03]
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
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Cannibal Curiosity:
“It took us like 18 years to find bin Laden, but within a week we can find a mountain lion.” – John [11:20] -
On Death & Animal Behavior:
“We're never food for anything else. We take, take, take, take, take.” – John referencing Ricky Gervais [16:05] -
On Broadcaster Culture:
“That’s the guy turning the mics on and off…he did nothing wrong.” – John [25:38]- “It's on the producer.” – John [35:46]
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On Personal Anecdotes:
“My memory of that is different than everyone else at that wedding. If you talk to anybody else at the Hanson wedding and you say, what's your memory? It's like, ‘oh, that beautiful speech.’ Mine was the smell of Brady's mothballed suit that hadn't been worn in months.” – John [34:01]
Important Timestamps
| Timestamp | Segment | Description | |-----------|-----------------------------------------------|--------------------------------------------------------------------| | 03:22 | Cannibal Curiosity Riff | John expresses intense curiosity about the "taste" of humans. | | 05:46 | Mountain Lion Logic | Why do we assume animals are "fans" after a single bite? | | 16:05 | Dahmer & Gervais Reference | Media never reports what cannibals say about human flavor. | | 17:52 | "Brady Would Be Wagyu" | Running joke about eating show members; culinary metafiction. | | 24:46 | Flyers Announcer Story Begins | Transition to Philadelphia Flyers hot mic scandal. | | 29:28 | Wedding Crotch Prank Story | Prank at a solemn wedding; irreverent illustration of male humor. | | 34:57 | Flyers Announcer Actual Hot Mic Audio | Broadcast clip: “while you’re down there, would you mind blowing me” | | 35:46 | “It’s on the producer.” | Emphasis on technical responsibility for on-air gaffes. | | 41:05 | Local News Parody | Satirizing Phoenix radio personalities and workplace banter. |
Tone & Signature Style
- Language:
Irreverent, dark, playful; plenty of black humor and free-flowing banter. - Speaker Dynamics:
John leads with provocative prompts and satire; Brady plays affable straight man and joins in the riffing; others add to the absurdity. - Recurring Themes:
- The absurdity of human arrogance regarding nature and risk.
- Satire of workplace sensitivity and “apology culture.”
- Endlessly creative speculation about taboo subjects, anchored in news events.
Summary Takeaway
This episode is a raucous, boundary-pushing cruise through the aftermath of a mountain lion attack, human-animal relationships, and the politics of public blunders—spiced with personal stories and jokes about cannibalism and media hypocrisy. If you missed it, you missed John & crew at their most unfiltered and entertaining: challenging assumptions, lampooning societal reactions, and finding comedy in the darkest corners of current events.
