← Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona
Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona
01-07-25 - Debate Over 9yo In Yuma Wanting A Trump Tattoo On Her Neck And Making Dumb Life Lasting Decisions - Liquid Death Sold Out Of Diapers For Concert Mosh Pits And John's Janis Joplin Rant
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John Holmberg
All right, HMS Podcast, time again to let you know where to go for some great comedy in the Valley this week. Get out to the Tempe Improv on the east side to see Paul Versey on Thursday and Beth Stelling Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. The Desert Ridge Improv up north features Sarah Weinschenk this Thursday and Joe Derosa on Friday and Saturday. And downtown at Stand Up Live, check out the very funny Lil Rel performing Friday, Saturday, and Sunday for the complete lineups. And for tickets, go to standuplive.com desertridgeimprov.com and tempeimprov.com it's John Holberg here. For the amazing people at the Core Institute, life can throw you a curveball now and again. One day you're trucking along, feeling great. Next day your dog smashes into your head and knocks you cold. Or like a KUPD listener told me this week, his dog did a sprint across the backyard directly into the side of his wife's leg and blew her knee up. She needed that need to get fixed and fixed right? Two years later, she's running like she used to again. And it's all thanks to the Core Institute. I went through it, too. And you can get rid of your pain and start saying, yes, I can to all the things you want to do. And. And all you have to do is trust the experts at the Core Institute. Head there right now. The core institute.com college hoops are here, and there's no better place to catch the action than Hooters. Fuel up with the baller bundle. 10 boneless wings, crispy fries, dressing, and a fountain drink starting at just $9.99. Want to level up your game day experience? Swap the fountain drink for a Beat the Buzzer special featuring your choice of Beatbox or buzz balls for a low price. This offer is for game days only, so grab your crew, enjoy the action, and feast on the flavors. You Hooters, the original wing joint. Since 1983, you've been deceived by an agent of Satan himself. He's evil sitting right here. Come on. No, no, he's not. He's not evil. He's just a bit rude. There it is. Yeah, that's good. I like that. Brett. Actually, this is a great phrase that only happens in this room. Right in the middle of that song, Breco should have said Jew nose. And I'm like, you're right. Huge nose. It would have rhy. I know what you're saying, but maybe they'll do the remix for us in the remix, please. You had the courage to say, make your cock rise with the sun and then throw the rooster in, which is a great line. But Miles to nowhere. Well done. Our new wake up theme song for 2025 by Our Palladio champions, Miles to Nowhere, Katie and the Hobbs. Yes. And I love that in the middle of that, they slow it way down. And Miles to. They throw their own name and their own. Brilliant. And one of the reasons they won is because on stage during the Palladio thing, when she said, well, all I can say is thanks for the spins, mother. And then they just went right into the song because we all remember Katie and the Hobbs introduction to us was maybe the most horrifying thing we've all heard and became what it is. I don't even know if I still have it in there, but it's good stuff. Nice job. Thank you. Miles to nowhere. Excellent job. Debate raging on this morning. Yeah. Ian Schwartz even said, oh, my God, that new open is awesome. See, everybody loves it. If you don't know, I want to hear from you. Debate raging. And this one's kind of an interesting thing to me. There's a nine year old girl in Arizona, down in southwestern Arizona that went into a tattoo parlor to get her tattoo touched up. Already had it. Yeah. Here's the thing. A year ago, what she wanted at age 8 and a half, 9, was a tattoo of Donald Trump on her neck. So I'm saying that the parents have some influence on this kid's thinking. There's no nine year old is that big a fan of Donald Trump without some help from mom and dad. My guess is they weren't Biden Harris people. And the kid decided on her own to be a Trump fan because she's, you know, learned the subtle nuances of politics to a point of making her own decisions at age 8, 9 years old. They're idiots. Just a big fan of the Apprentice growing up. I mean, what are you going to do, right? So growing up, that was 18 years ago, she was, she was a negative. She was a twinkle in her dad's underwear. She wasn't even a thing yet. So she goes in there. So it went to a black onyx Empire tattoo in Yuma and said that he tattooed an American flag on her. Her parents were there. It wasn't that she wouldn't wander in there by herself. The parents said it was okay. And the video posted, the artist shows the girl getting her tattooed touched up at the shop and then everybody lost their minds. Well, the parents said it was a Thing. The girl originally wanted the Donald Trump on her neck, but the artist said in the post I convinced her to get something more patriotic, you know? And I agree. I agree with the tattoo artist on that. A little longer lasting. Plus, you don't want to get somebody's face on you that may screw up. Still, having a human being, like, you know, Dom used to work here, had Corey Taylor's face on his leg, busting out of the calf. Right. Well, it wasn't even, like, cool, like, he was, like, breaking. It was just there. It was just portrait. I was thinking of something else. I wanted one I showed you years ago of. Of the Shining. Yeah. Where Jack Nicholson is coming through the door. But I wanted that on my calf. And I remember it's something you can find. It's not like a. And then people have done it, so it looks like he's crawling out of your leg, and it's really cool. But then I was talked out of it because now I would have regretted having that on my leg in a huge way. You don't want somebody's face on there. And I used to tell Dom that. I'm like, yeah, Corey Taylor's awesome. So was Bill Cosby. Do you. Do you want that? You don't want somebody's face unless they're dead. Right? It's like buying a jersey for a football team. It's pointless nowadays to buy a current player. Only purchase jerseys of your team's great players. If I'm a Cardinal, I'm only getting, you know, Larry Fitzgerald, maybe Kurt Warner. That's acceptable because, you know, he took you to the heights you've never reached before, which was losing to the Steelers in the Super Bowl. But still, it was the best. Neil Lomax. Neil Lomax would be a nice throwback, but he's alive. Always associated with. I wouldn't. I'm not getting a tattoo of his. Retired, though. But I'm getting a jersey. I'm getting a jersey. I'm not going to tattoo a forever because I can throw the jersey away and act like I never had it. I'm not getting anything permanent. But, yeah, like, what I'm saying is you don't want to get a new one. Like, you know, I've got two Najee Harris jerseys. The guy's not going to be a steeler next year. 90% chance. So I've got. I've got a closet full of jerseys of dudes who have moved on. And that's just because I'm collecting. But I'm smart enough to know that the real ones are, you know, for me, Jerome Bettis, Bradshaw, Roethlisberg, I got a lot to choose from. I've got Joe Green, I've got Franco Harris, Rocky Blyer. I've got loads and loads and loads of Frenchie of. I would get a Frenchie Fuqua. I'd have to explain it to a lot of people, but I'm like, look, the Immaculate Reception doesn't happen if he doesn't cheat. And I've admitted that Tatum probably touched it first. Shouldn't happen, but oh well, didn't win the super bowl that year anyway. I don't know why that's such a big deal to the Raiders. So, yeah, so you get into that kind of thing. But if you get a tattoo of somebody on you. So I agree with the tattoo artist, especially on a nine year old. So the president's a dead president. Like you get Jimmy Carter on now or. Yeah, you know what? Now you can. Yeah, yeah. Abe Lincoln would be a pretty cool tattoo. I'm not gonna lie. It's like he's accomplished all he's gonna accomplish. Controversy. Probably out of the woods there. But if they dig up anything new on him, it's debatable. I'm sure we're gonna see an uptick of Jimmy Carter tattoos at Club Tattoo today. Jimmy tattoos would be pretty sweet. By the way, Tommy Emanuel looks like a living version of the Simpsons drawing of Jimmy Carter, which was really kind of strange on stage. That was hard for me to see past that. But yeah. So you go down and get the Donald Trump thing. So back to the nine year old girl. So the video says that people online started to lose their mind. They petitioned the tattoo shop and they did all that stuff, but they say according to Arizona law, and I didn't know this, it's legal to tattoo a child as long as the parents are there and at any age. So 4, 5, I guess if you wanted to be in like in Arkansas or Alabama or something. But yeah, I think the rest. And you think it. Well, and then. And then. But then you go back to like Hawaiians or Samoans or Pacific Islanders and they throw those things on kids. That's a rite of passage. Like when you become. Doesn't teenager, doesn't Moana have like, you know, Boner Garage or something? Like, isn't Moana have tattoos? I think that's Patrick Junction. I'm a man, so I haven't watched Moana. But haven't you, like. I think. I think she does. Probably Pacific island or some sort of marking. So in a way it becomes like this racist. Oh, those savages will do it to their kids. But, yeah, I forget the girl's name. And my wife, Ben Shaw, with the alliance of Professional Tattoos, said Arizona is one of the least regulated states for tattoo artists where you don't even need a license to practice doing tattoos. In this state. I didn't know that. But where do you get a license for it if you're good at art and you can do it? You draw the turtle and then the sketches. I saw those commercials late at night, the pirate. And then you draw a pirate and a turtle and then you're like, I can do this. And then they send you needles and like, AIDS kits. I don't know. That's the only thing I want regulated at a tattoo parlor is cleanliness. I don't care if you're licensed to do it. I'll take a look at some of your old work and know that you're not going to shoot, you know, hep c into me because you don't clean the materials. I said, just because something is legal doesn't mean it's ethical. That's the argument people are making. I can give professionals. It can give all professionals a bad reputation. If you see a 10 year old with a professional tattoo and they say they got it at that particular tattoo shop, it degrades the entire group. And he is the alliance of Professional Tattooists leader. He said, in these cases where it's legal to tattoo a kid in the presence of a parent, it's really up to the individual tattoo artist to make the call. Which, by the way, when I went in to get two tattoos on my body drunk with a former Pittsburgh stealer named Troy Stedman. Years ago, he was a special teamer for played for Knoll. And then the first couple years of cower, and then he bought like, Gallagher's in town. And I happened to work at The Gallagher's for 10 minutes that he owned and we went out drinking and because I was just like, what? And we went to his house and he had his pictures of him as a stealer and like, oh, my God. And then we got really drunk and walked into a tattoo parlor in Tempe, and I'm like, we're doing this. I'm getting a Steeler logo on my leg. And the guy goes, you're too drunk. I'm like, what? Because I'm not doing it. You're drunk. And I'm like, you do it. I will pay you. And I got belligerent and Then I realized he's probably right. This is probably something I'm not thinking through, but it goes to the question, can a kid get a tattoo if the parents say it's okay? And does it make the tattoo artist a bad guy? No, I think all tattoos that I don't think, like, it's of all ages. Like, if you're. When is the proper age to get a tattoo? And then it begs the question, does the tattoo artist have the right to say, this is the dumbest tattoo ever. I'm not doing this. Which they could do. And they save you from yourself at age 8 or 9, you're not making that decision. But here's the thing that I. When I saw the story on the news, I was kind of like, that's funny. We. There's a big, huge debate beginning about this, and yet there are people out there who think that it's a bad idea for kids to get tattooed. And it's abusive, but yet there's an entire group of people that think a child is capable of making a decision on whether or not it wants its own genitals. Tattoo is nothing. Tattoo is nothing compared to that. Either they're allowed to make decisions on their own or they're not. And I say they're not. I personally think that any nine year old making a decision that is forever can't do it if we don't let them vote for anything until they're 18, and even then we're, like, still stupid. There's no possible way they're going to make a decision that lasts their entire life. That's quality. End of story. You know what I mean? Like, an 8 and 9 year old can't just go, I want that on my body forever. And the reason I didn't do my Steelers tattoo is because the Browns moved. That's. That's why. Yes, it was 100%. Why? Because nobody in 19. This was 1996. It was right around the time the Browns were moving and somebody said, what if the Steelers move or you stop liking them? I'm like, impossible. And I'm like, but it isn't. The Browns moved, and at the time, there were no more Cleveland Browns. It wasn't sure that they were ever going to come back. And I'm like, you know, that's a pretty quality point right there. Then I'm. Then I've got this. I hate the Steelers and I've got this stuck to my leg for. I was picking a big Steeler logo on my calf. It would have been tough to cover and this is a bad idea because it's like putting, you know, Enron on your body. It's just a business. Just because I happen to have a personal feeling for it. It's nothing more than a business. And that business can let me down. I mean, there might be a dude out there with the Enron E on his leg somewhere going, I really thought this was going to take. I thought this was the next big thing, you know. So tattoos to me are a decision of, like, you don't want to commit to anybody's face, name, just in case. Or a business logo. Some of that. The business side of it. Or, you know, could be historical after a while. Oh, this was an energy company back then. Sure, I got it. If you're doing. Because that's retroactive stuff. I was put, I think, tattoos on there. Sometimes I want people to inquire, what's this? What's that? Are you behind it? Something that's already established and done, that's different and it goes away. Like, you know, if you have. Or. But what if Oilers and they now. Sure. And that's disappointing. And a lot of Houston Oiler fans hate that they left. And a lot of Cleveland Brown fans became Steeler fans. They would never root for the Ravens. Had the Browns never come back. Most Browns fans would have been Bengals or Steelers fans just to be angry at the Ravens. Yeah. So the Browns came back and made it easier. But there's a lot of Oilers fans. They didn't just take to the idea they're the Tennessee Titans now. That wasn't a good thing. And then you got this embarrassment on your leg. So, you know, yeah, you can put a business on your leg. But what if it, you know, if you're like, I was a big fan of Exxon. My grandpa worked for Exxon DeLorean. And then they spilled and killed all those animals. And like, well, I gotta change it. I was a big Papa John's fan when they opened. Whoops. So I look at tattoos as. I don't look at them as like, oh, that's really cool. I look at them as like, is this something that will eventually be. Somebody out there has a puff Daddy tattoo? I guarantee you. Oh, sure. I guarantee you somebody was puffy enough to get one. And now what? That's embarrassing. So, you know, when it comes down to that, for me, people's faces, girlfriends or boyfriends names. Ask Flip Orley, who was convinced that his fifth relations, fifth wife was going to be the one that stuck. And he had Stacia's Name tattooed to five different parts of his body, including his penis shaft. And now he has the word pistachio all over his body because that was the only way to fix a couple of them. I love flip, but flip it. We told him, I'm like, you're bad at relationships, and, no, this one's gonna stick. I'm like, no, it's not flip. And next time we saw him, I'm like, where's that lady? Who's the new girl? Well, I was looking at a security camera, and she was having sex with a man in my backyard. Like, what? So he had everywhere. He made a. He tied them all together with, like, a cowboy rope. He was so sure. Oh, it was a snake, wasn't it? Well, he had the snake too, but the one was like a lasso, and the back had it. It was crazy. And they were all kind of linked together. His whole body was covered in her name. And the one thing spelled her name on the way to the next thing. So it just had. It had her name everywhere. I love him, but that's a dumb idea. Yeah, you don't want to do that. You know, somewhere along the lines you have to remember, I watch a lot of murder shows. Remember that. Is that the person you love might turn into Scott Peterson. There was a talk, I guarantee you, that Scott and Lacy had in their little house up there in Northern California at one point going, you know what? Now that you're pregnant, we should get your name and my name and the baby's name tattooed to our arms. Oh, my God, Scott, that's so romantic. I agree. Holberg's morning sickness. Holberg's morning sickness. Hey, it's Larry McFeely here with Wayne from Amco and Wayne, now that it's getting warmer, I turned on the AC in my car and the air's blowing kind of cool, but it really smells like a base. What can I do about that, Larry? Your car's AC system should be checked and serviced every year. Plus, replacing the cabin air filter helps the air blow strong and takes away any nasty smell. Nice. Is that a big deal to get done? Not at all. It takes about an hour, and in most cases, we can do it while you wait. That's awesome. I'll say. We're Amco. Google Amco for your nearest location. That's Amco double A MCO transmissions and a whole lot more. Hi, I'm Diane Fisher from Fisher Tools. From our humble beginnings in 1964 at the Phoenix park and swap to our 4 acre campus located just south of Tempe Marketplace off the 202. Emmett Clin Fisher Tools has been building the valley for over 60 years. Come check us out and browse our huge selection of tools and anything you need to do the job right. We carry Milwaukee, DeWalt, Makita, Proto and so much more. We're also online@fishertools.com KUPD listeners will receive 10% off their order when you mention this ad. Fisher Tools. If we don't have it, we can't sell it. Hey everybody, it's John Holmberg from the Morning Sickness talking to Shane Orlando from Orlando Auto Body. Now, Shane, I take great pride in saying I stand with someone when I tell a listener to go to their shop. I know why. You tell me what's different for a KUPD listener to go to Orlando Auto Body than anywhere else? Well, first of all, we've been in the Valley here for over 34 years. We do a quality job. We work for you, not the insurance companies, so that we can work together to make sure your listeners are getting the customer service they deserve. If your car's been wrecked and you need that thing fixed the right way, get on over there now. Orlandoautobody.com this is Michael with Restore My Civil Rights. I made a lot of poor decisions in my past that had lifelong consequences. After I was released from prison for the last time in 2014, I discovered the process to have my convictions dismissed and all of my rights restored, including my Second Amendment rights. Since achieving this for myself in 2018, our attorney has assisted over 3,000 others in doing the same. If you are still living under the consequences of past mistakes and would like to restore your rights as I have, visit restoremycivilrights.com and book a free consultation today. It's John Holmberg from the morning sickness for lifechangealone.com Let me tell you about Brian and Emily. Brian listens to KUPD loyally. Megan listens to the news. But both of them have heard about Life Change alone for a long time. Both were curious. They never bothered really to look too deep since they felt good about their 20 year loan with a good rate. But they want to remodel their house and add a pool and that's going to cost about $250,000. After visiting Life Changer Loan, they realize they can still pay off the entire thing in about six years. It is not magic, it's math. Life changerloan.com and then Scott Peterson lobbed her head off and you know, that's the only identifying features and Stuff and then you don't want that with a fish underneath it. Yeah, yeah, A little Jesus fish is what we'll call it. We're not religious. You'll see. You're gonna sleep with those. Why are you getting the tattoo? Just get. Just do it. They have to identify you somehow, and that'll be guarantees. But there's talk of, you know, getting somebody's name tattooed to you, and it's always bad, terrible idea. You never know. You know, John Wayne Gacy dated someone and thought, you know, they're very charming, the serial killers. And terrible people are charming because that's what they have to be to get away with what they're doing. Very rarely is the serial killer other than Dahmer, like the creepiest dude in the world. But by the way, Dahmer pretty gay, charming. That dude went down there and swung a lot of dick. He did a lot of. That guy Larry struggles getting ladies. Dahmer did not have a problem with what he was interested in. Following him back to the house. So tattoos to me, you know, artwork, a flower, dragons. Big into dragons, castles, movies. You like skulls? Skulls are cool. Stuff that can't, like, come back and, you know, like rape later. Somebody's got a Bill Cosby tattoo. Probably big fan of comedy, you know, maybe changed his life. It's like, man, wasn't for Bill Cosby, I'd have never written that movie. And he's got a Cosby tattoo on him. And the next thing you know, you're like, oh, no. So I. But a nine year old making a decision, Donald Trump is still too. And I know there's a lot of people out there, you know, you see him as a demigod and all that stuff, but he's, he's. He walks the line every once in a while and the next thing you know, you're like, you got a tattoo of somebody or, you know, I could turn into a tough time. He isn't reliable enough to stamp on my body. Wait for this to play out, is what I'm saying. And as far as nine year olds getting tattoos, that's that to me, that's 100% on the parents. But if we're saying nine year olds can't make tattoos because that decision is too big for them, we need to just shut down that whole genital operation thing completely. Gotta get that Harvey Weinstein tattoo covered up. Yeah, Harvey probably made a few people do it. If you wanna be in my good graces, you get a tattoo of my big, fat, ugly face on your body. With words. I love Harvey. I'll do it. All right, Charlize Theron, you're gonna be a star on your knees. But yeah, I just, you know, talk about company logo that W on the Weinstein. Oh, a lot of good pictures. Very possibly somebody's got that on there. I don't know. But yeah, you get a tattoo or something like that and you know Donald, you gotta let it play out. Let Donald Trump play out because you don't know how that's gonna end yet. So. But again, look, if we're even having a debate over whether kids can are smart enough to make decisions on tattoos, if that's even a debate still, let's just throw away the idea that they can't decide what gender they are until they're 18. Is that fair? And I know there's people out there going, oh, but my child is all right, let it remain confused till it could screw it up. Till you're gonna screw it up anyway. All parents screw their kids up, especially if by 9 they're not sure if they're a girl or a boy yet. Send it to therapy, make sure it's kind of going. But it's gonna have a tough teenage years. Yep, that's gonna happen. You know what, it's gonna have a tough set of teenagers if you swap out its Jennies too. So either way, let's just make that an 18 and older decision. If tattoos are still in the, you know, we're not so sure box, certainly cutting off their genitals is off the table until we. Let's sort out the tattoo law. Steve makes a good point. You can get a tattoo removed, but you can't grow back your dong. That's exactly, Steve. Truer words have never been spoken. And I've tried to grow my dong a little more. Haven't we all? Look, every pornhub video is a 1/3 chance that it's going to tell me my dick's small. And there's something that can fix that. And I have thought about it. You might have a good one. Do you want it to be 8 inches or more? Well, yeah. Then order this. Click, click, click, click. Try it out. Yeah, I'm just rubbing this, you know, root on my root. It burns. That means it's working. Okay. Salt and two other ingredients will make you hard. Click here for the other two. A rope and a 25 pound weight. I've been duped. But yeah, if you're tattooing your kid and it's a thing. Look, if you're tattooing your Kid, there's something wrong with you too. If you're not a Pacific Islander. That's the only thing, like, for some reason, and I don't understand it. And I think, like, the Indians don't do it. They're like certain tribes and stuff. And what about the ones that do the scarring thing where they do the pattern? Oh, the. The taps, the original. I watched that happen. I watched the. When I was at that tattoo festival, I watched the. How it originally got done and the way that they do it ceremonially in some of the islands down in the South Pacific, which was with a nail and a stick, and they just tap you. And those dudes make some amazing art. And it looks like they're just hitting you with a hammer. Yeah. Next thing you know, it's beautiful. Thank God for technology. Yeah, exactly. I'm not doing that nonsense. I don't love my elders. Yeah. With a Stanley hammer over there, banging away. We do it the way the elders have done it. The elders were wrong. You know, we used to ride around in wagons with the elders, but we invented cars. It got better. There was dumb ways that we fixed. And that's one of them. Grab a needle and the buzzy noise and make it happen. But yeah. So, you know, tattoo for a kid. Okay. I really don't think you're being a good parent. That's my judgment of you, especially if it's of Donald Trump. Now, the argument that's coming at me through the airwaves, and I can feel it. You guys saw Trump. You can't get a trouble. All right? How would you feel if this was a Kamala Harris tattoo? Do you still think it's a good idea? No. Nobody wants a loser on them. That's right, Fred. That's why you shouldn't have that bear statue. I don't, but that's the thing. And you shouldn't and do not do it. That's a dumb tattoo. But that's my point. It's like it's. Now you've politicized like it's her right to do it. And you're right. She should be able to. But is it a good idea for a nine year old to make that decision? And would you be saying the exact same thing if it was Joe Biden? If a 9 year old wanted a Joe Biden tattoo, wouldn't you think that might be child abuse just because you like one guy? Look, I'll be honest with you. You've got the most hysterical family of all time. If your kid wants a biden tattoo on his neck. I'm doing that now. Get the rope and bucket. I'm paying extra for that. If I had a nine year old, it's like, daddy. What is it, kid? Yuck. Why do you always say yuck when you see me? I don't know the hanger marks. Go on. It's Biden in the quote. I'm serious. I want a Biden tattoo on my neck. Let's go get in the car. We're doing that. That's hilarious. I've got the funniest kid in the world. They've got the Biden on the neck. And it's Biden smelling her hair. Oh, man. Whiffing her is my daughter, Sabrina. Move your hair, honey. Show her your Biden tattoos. Like, what'd you do that for? My daughter's hilarious. That's all she's good for is this Biden tattoo. I wander around like a toy. Anyway, you want her. I don't. By the way, did you see Biden yesterday? He's lost his mind even more. Did you hear the thing? Yeah, yeah. When he goes, I know more God damn leaders in this world than any of you. No joke. I was like, not even an impression. It was just like, what? He got mad that somebody said, well, you know the world. I know more God damn leaders than. And he wasn't mad. It just started to pour out of the angry old man's voice. Somebody asked him a simple question, like, oh, boy. Biden's. We're about to lose him. I'm surprised, Carter, you didn't take him with. He's turning into Walt Walsky now. He's Walt. He is. Absolutely. That was my original impression of him four years ago. I didn't realize it was going to actually come true. These nips I got staring at me here. We got questions for me or something? Tell me about your time. And I know more God damn leaders in the world than all you put together. You're a bunch of pigs. Next question. Like, when did you get so angry? Hey, you kraut. He's lost it. And then, then he ends it with no joke. Like, I know more leaders than all of you combined. He quantified that in his head. He's like, I met more. And probably true. Over his 800 years on the planet Methuselah has met a lot of leaders. But if you got a tattoo of that dude, I think you might be the funniest person alive. You're getting a long coat. You're nuts. But you might be somebody I want to hang out with for a little while, for a whole lot. Now if you got a tattoo of him because you think he's so great, you're not funny, you're crazy. But if you're doing it for the novelty, that's a pretty funny tattoo. And you put Frankenstein next to him and like funny. You just, you keep it like the Mount Rushmore of weird airline steps, right? Yeah. You have your arm like him and then him tumbling down and then another tattoo of him on your hand, like giving you a thumbs up. Like he made it all the way down the arm. That's funny. But when you start saying that, oh, the nine year old got a tattoo of Trump and you say, shouldn't do that, that's crazy. People start getting political like, well, Trump, why is that so bad? Because it would be any other. Like if it was Barack Obama, you would be saying it's child abuse, it's political. I just think it's crazy for a kid to make a. Changing a life changing. I think they're maybe. I don't know if there should be a law, but I think it should definitely be frowned upon. Oh, she got a Pelosi woman power. A nine year old that wants a Pelosi tattoo has been brainwashed. I'm more looking into. Sure, the tattoo's fine. I'm more looking into what the parents are doing to make this kid think Nancy Pelosi is worth a lifetime commitment. Or Hillary. The picture I saw yesterday of Pelosi would look like a McDonald's look, I'll tell you, even her husband didn't want to make a lifetime commitment. And that's why he was. Dudes sometimes don't get mad at me. Pelosi lovers. That guy was banging that other guy that hit him in the head with a hammer. I don't remember his name, but Mr. Pelosi. Yeah. Paul Twink. Pelosi. Twink. He was Twink. You don't have friends in underwear over ever. I know it went sideways on him and I think the guy that did it was crazy. But you don't answer the door in underwear with a dude hanging at your house. What do you want? Why are you guys. Why are the police here? Megan never came home to you in Stebbings there in your underwear or what? Maybe it's not even. And the police never showed up with Mark and I in our underpants. And I act shocked when they're. What are you guys doing here? Well, there's a disturbance. Is there a guy with a hammer in here? Of Course there is. I'm in my underwear. Why wouldn't there be? Is my wife. Are you guys warning me that my wife's on her way home? I thought she was in Washington. Yeah, when your wife's out of town, all the way across country and you're in the house in your underwear with anybody and the cops come and you're not like, like, get him. They're immediately like, hey, guys, what's up? Like, you're still pretty calm. Something was going on that we didn't know. So again, a tattoo of Nancy Pelosi. Even her husband didn't want her that badly. If Melania doesn't have a tattoo of Donald, neither should your nine year old. You shouldn't love your politician that much. Ever. You shouldn't love anybody that much. Things can turn on a dime. How many friends do we have that have. Imagine if Dick Middaugh, our friend Mangoop. Imagine if our friend Mangoop, married nine times now and engaged again. He'd have the Brady Bunch on the. On his back. His back would look like. Yeah, would look like a goddamn bottom of the Declaration of Independence. Signature after signature. He'd look like he got 20 co signers for a car and as many times as he said, nope, this one's different. She's the one. I'll tattoo it on you. And then you realize that, oh, maybe I shouldn't tell your. That's actually a good litmus test for whether or not you're ready to get married. You want to spend the rest of your life with her? I absolutely do. It's just amazing. Let's get her name tattooed to your back real big. I don't know if I'm ready for that. And you shouldn't do this. It looks like a concert T shirt tour. Yeah, it's like the tours of like into mid augs tour stops. Angela, Tina, Big Head, Fat Ass. I'm not sure all their names. This is what I was calling them, but yeah. If Mangoop started to say that, if you're not ready to tattoo that person's name on your body, you probably aren't ready to make the lifetime commitment. And you shouldn't be making lifetime commitments at the age of nine. That's just, that's my rule. You have kids, you do what you want. And I know what people. You don't have kids. You don't understand. Okay? If you want to get your kid a tattoo, go ahead, but I don't think it's a good idea. I think they might regret that because when I was nine years old. If you'd asked me, what tattoo do you want? It would have been of Dave Kingman. I'm 52. I wouldn't want that anymore. Yeah. And it would still be there. And it would be faded. And I'd probably have a picture of him, you know, in mid swing, number 10, in the powder blue Cub uniform that says King Kong underneath it. Now I just look gay. What's this? It's a guy I'm a big fan of back in the 70s. Who is it? Don't ask. Dave Kingman. Never heard of him. Tell me, tell me. Go after myself politically. Look, I wasn't. Right? I was nine and someone who allowed that, I'm like, I agree. Dan Holmberg is the guy who allowed that. You'd blame your parents. Your parents already do enough damage on you, let alone letting you get a lifetime. Would you ever let Kirby get her idol, Bob Marley tattooed to her? Yeah. Stupid. I mean, she's gonna have a joint on her arm that's smoking. Yeah. There's gonna be a blunt on her arm. She came back and said, oh, how about Viggy? Or, you know. No, she wants one of the Marleys. Yeah. I said, no, Dan. That's the only real from Cypress Hill she's allowed. Dan Marley. That's as far as Bernie will take it in Gilbert. You're not getting a Jamaican tattooed to Kirby's arm. They'll get kicked out of Gilbert. We can't get into the Buck and Rider over on Gilbert Avenue if you have a negro tattooed to your body. It's Dick Toledo. And new customers right now on FanDuel. Get $150 in bonus bets when your first $5 wager wins. Just visit FanDuel.com KUPD to grab $150 in college hoops bonus bets with a winning five dollar bet and prepare for March on FanDuel, America's number one sportsbook 21 plus in President Arizona, first online real money wager only five dollars. First deposit required. Bonus issued as non withdrawable bonus bets which expire seven days after receipt. Restrictions apply. See terms@sportsbook.fanduel.com gambling problem. Call 1-800-next- step or text. Next step to 533-42. Yeah, when you said 9, I'm like, I don't know. Me with the Archie Griffin on the back. Well, you know, in hindsight. But is he still alive? Yeah. Yeah. Don't do it. You never know when Archie's gonna lose his mind and shoot up a mall, because especially with a football Player in that CTE Sleaster Archleester has a story. He'd be all right, but again, you look pretty gay when you just have a dude named Art on your arm. Yeah. Just chucking a football, like, who's that? Oh, it's a long. If you have to tell a story to everybody else of who it is, like Derek Zellner, it's the wrong. It's the wrong tat. Yeah, yeah. It's not legendary. That's Rex Kern. If you could get a president, if you. I like your Abe Lincoln one. I think Abe Lincoln's a solid president. To get Washington solid, you know, I'm sure there's a ton of rappers that have Washington or, you know, on a dollar bill or something. Oh, yeah, well, yeah, he's not a president, but Ben Franklin and head. Just like. I think you get a Ben Franklin tattoo, that's $100. Einstein. Einstein's a pretty interesting tattoo. If you're getting a dude tattooed to your body, I suppose that's a good one. Furious Styles. Laurence Fishburne could still kill people. And the last thing you want is that last little. All right, we're all done. And then you look up at the news. Laurence Fishburne just raped eight people. God damn it. Should have waited till he was dead. I just don't agree with it. So you can get something, but it has to be novelty. Funny. Like, AOC has to have her top off for you to get an aoc. That's a good one. But if you're. If you're serious about making a political statement. But again, we're talking about a nine year old, so. We're also talking about Yuma, so let's be honest about that too. This kid's going nowhere. He's got parents that allow tattoos when she's at 9. Yeah, I'm surprised they waited that long. It's Yuma, for God's sakes. I mean, we all know what's gonna happen to that kid. Raised in that prison culture of Yuma, it's Getting tattoos at 9. See you in Florence, kid. I don't know where. The girl. Wherever. Toledo's wife was hemmed up for a little while. Probably gonna be in that cell if you've got nine. If your parents are allowing tattoos at nine, you're not changing the world, especially if it's of Trump. You'll just never be more. You're not gonna be the CEO of anything with that. When'd you get that? I was nine years old. Like, man, you made some life altering choices at 9. Knew what I wanted. I knew what I was in last night. That orange to pop. Yeah. I need to touch up the head. Make it more orange. Could you make the lips fishier? Anyway, the debate rages on. Oh, I got something. Yeah. One over there. But this one said Toledo should get a question mark with ears for a tattoo for his dad on his arm. I like that. This one says, At 14, I wanted death before dishonor across my chest with flags on the sides. I would have looked like the biggest douche ever. Might as well have had bro written on my body. I don't know. At 14, you just shouldn't be making those choices. Especially because if you didn't get into, like, military stuff or anything like that, and you ended up being like, a janitor at the high school, and you've got death before dishonor. That's almost like stolen valor. It's like. Yeah. What about getting a tattoo of Obama? And Big Mike was in the Barry Wood pose. Again, if you're going novelty funny, that's hilarious. If you got. Because I have. Our artist, J. Todd Himes could probably conjure up an Obama as Barry Woods. Pretty good. Which is a pretty good one. And if you got that tattooed to your body, that's. It's funny. And that way, if they go off and start killing or raping, yours was funny to begin with. Like edge. I think it's hilarious. It's too much to explain, though. Anyway, and also, the other thing yesterday that I absolutely loved every second of is. And I wanted to talk about this yesterday, but I didn't. Liquid Death. Did you see what they're up to? Liquid Death, the water company. Fantastic. And they're very funny. And they've got a great marketing team. They came up with a mosh pit Nappies, they call them in England. Mosh pit nappies for people who cause these giant Hyde park concerts. It's hard to leave your space in Hyde park. You get like 60 or 70,000 people in a flat space to watch a concert, and it's hard to find the bathroom. You gotta go. So they built these mosh pit Liquid Death diapers. They got in touch with the people at Depends, and they sold out so fast that they're gonna start doing them for all concerts now. Liquid Death is selling, and you can get it online. They're mosh pit diapers for, you know, standing up at you. We saw the picture of people. You don't lose your space. Well, on the Strip in Vegas. Yeah. You know, when you're in that pile on New Year's Eve. Oh, the idiots in New York City, they wear diapers today. You can't go to the bathroom. It's like nine, 10 hours of holding your space. Idiots. Imagine a girl now, I don't want two or three times. I don't want frozen pee. Like, it can get down into the teens and twenties. So when you wet your pants, I don't know what happens to the adult diaper in cold climate, but I assume it freezes, Right? Or you're. I would think. I don't know. While you're doing it, your balls start to steam. Yeah, it's just warm for a split second for a little bit, and then steam runs off of your midsection. Everybody knows what you just did, but, yeah, pissing yourself is now the next lazy step for people who don't want to miss one drum hit all the way through the mosh pit at a Hate Breed show. So they'd rather piss themselves than be adults. They sold out. Even the guy from Liquid Death was kind of like, we were kind of kids. But I guess there's a call for this. And people just got them all. They are kind of neat. They're black. They've got a skull and crossbones and the Liquid Death logo right there on the front. And you just piss yourself instead of wandering all the way over to the bathroom. I mean, we all have been over to Cricket, Desert Sky Pavilion, Ashley Home Furniture Store Pavilion. That walk all the way from the stage to the bathroom. That might take a minute. I don't have that kind of time. Wonderful guy, Pete got a pair. We ain't got time for that. Death. Oh, yeah, Pete. Yeah, that could be. I don't know. We'll ask him about him. Yeah, I don't have time for that. Oh, man. And I don't want to stand in line. And now I'm going to do it at Suns Games. I don't want to go all the way down to the bathrooms. Oh, no. Somebody got. That's a woman's legs. Yeah. Yeah. Got the Golden Girls tattooed. Two per thigh all the way across her legs on her lap. It says, stay golden. Like portraits. I mean, yeah, Pretty good artistic portraits of the four Golden Girls. And it looks to be her only tattoo. And then this one came in for Toledo. It's a text that says, dad, I miss you. And underneath it says, not delivered. It's got the red exclamation point because there's no. It didn't get through. Richard, I will pay for that. Richard, for God's sakes, please get that tattoo. Please. Hi, Richard. Please. There's a payday stuntman right there. It's got a date on it. And it's. It's January 20th. Yours would be July 20th. So it's. You get the pretty good idea of what it's like. That might be the new payday stuntman. Although there is no stunt you need to do. This is. The stunt was already done by your dad. You just need to acknowledge it. That's awesome. Hip. Where is that? I think it's his arm, isn't it? Right around the elbow? Yeah, I think it's inside here, right? Yeah, yeah. It's right up above his bicep, I guess. I don't know. Either way, wherever you put it, I don't care. But that needs to be on your body. That's too good. And again, in current times, we all understand it in a few years when texting doesn't exist and we just imagine things and send it. What's that thing you got a lot of Explaining it's time too much to a certain era. But, Dad, I miss you. Not delivered is great. Hilarious. In fact, the little red exclamation point over the top of how good that is. Anyway, buy your diapers, piss yourself at concerts and events as the world gets lazier and fatter. Walk into the bathroom, evidently, is too much. And Liquid Death saw the opening in the market, made a joke, and sold out of diapers for adults so we could go to shows. Who knew? Is there a show? You see, I just. I don't think I like crowds that much that there's nothing that you don't want to miss a second. There's nothing that good that I wouldn't just go, well, I. I gotta piss myself to enjoy this. I think I'm pretty much willing to like Woodstock. What? 99. Woodstock, 99. People just whipped out and pissed on the ground and then. And then had babies in it again. It's always the case of. Here's our new one from our new album. All right, time to pass. Time to go take a leak. They're doing that for you. That's a favor to you also, by the way, and I've said this before, I'll say it again any chance I get. I will reiterate this. Woodstock is America's most exaggerated and biggest disgusting failure of all time. Both of them. The second one was better than the first. I'll say that a the lineup that number two was better. The first one was just gross 100%. I would rather be in a potential life threatening fire than hippies. Than hippies giving birth in their poop water. Yeah, three days worth of water and a child is floating in it attached to an umbilical cord that. I'll take the fire over that a thousand times over. Why we romanticize Woodstock is beyond me. Every video I've ever seen, it's grosser and grosser. Every angle you look, the people are dirty and gross. Like literally. I, I don't care. I want a restaurant to shut down. If a live birth happens in it and people celebrate it, that restaurant can't be open to me anymore. That's not. That's something you need to like go. Wow. We. We needed to get that out of the dining room. Murders. Live births. There were murders and rapes at Woodstock. And you've seen baby buttholes in. I have seen baby and adult buttholes in restaurants. Wait, an adult? I don't. Oh, yeah, no, the baby, she. It wasn't a baby either. The thing was like 7 or 8 years old while she wiped its ass in the lobby or in the little waiting area. And then when she bent down, her pants fell off. And I saw a second butthole. I saw Double Gypsy Butthole. Double Gypsy Butthole, first band name of 2025. Write that down. Double Gypsy Butthole is. That's the winner for the year already. I know. Even better, it would be Outback Double Gypsy Butthole. Because that's where I saw it, at the Outback. And the giant moose knuckle at ZT House. Well, that was just somebody with their legs open too far. That wasn't pretty. Brady and I had front row seats. Billboard, some ladies, gynecologists, worst nightmare. Yikes. Either way, Woodstock is the most overrated thing in American history, musically or otherwise. Wavy Gravy, really? You want to look at the lineup of Woodstock and then you're like three good ones. Maybe like the most epic one or one of them was Jimi Hendrix and that was like he played a song six in the Morning and there was like a hundred people there. Yeah. And between songs, all you hear is of another live. Somebody just gave birth to another beautiful little child in this puddle. Oh, great. John, I don't know what you're watching, but the second Woodstock was just as gross. Watch that documentary. Oh, it's gross. But I'll take that one over the first one. Just musically. Yeah, well, musically and events. I'll take all that went on at Woodstock two way before Woodstock one. If I gotta listen to Wavy Gravy and Watch a child get born. I'm killing myself now. I might be able to tolerate followed up by Country Joe and the Fish. Oh, come on. Why am I even there? I'm looking. I'm pitching a ride home. Or Arlo Guthrie. Jesus. If I listen to Janis Joplin, the world's most, like, 12 minute song, and then Janice Joplin goes out there and screeches like a cat under a car tire for five minutes, world. I'll put Janis Joplin on the list of most overrated singer of all time. I don't know what happened to people who thought Janis Joplin was good. She's terrible, John. I swear to God, if people start pissing and cutting logs at damn concerts when I'm standing right next to them, I'm done with society. And see there, that guy's right. Because you. Liquid death is probably like, they're just for peeing. Somebody's gonna poop in that diaper. Because they're like, well, why not Brady? Why wouldn't I? I'm just standing here. I don't know. Why would I walk all the way up there? I've got to take my fourth poo of the day. Bought the diaper. I'm in a diaper. I didn't see the poop coming, but now that it's here, I'm just gonna let it knock down the door. You're taking poop over Joplin? Oh, I'd rather bathe and poop than listen to Joplin. And I'm talking about on a record. If somebody played a record and said, the only way to make this stop is to get into this. But, oh, he's already in it. He's swimming in poop. I would be horrible. Oh, the worst singer ever. Where's the tub of feces I can get into? Yuck. And then you see her and you're like, worse. Get her out. At least the voice matches the face. Yeah, yeah. The voice and the face are like. When you hear for the first time, you're like, wow, I'm picturing, like, a. A trollish lesbian and like a. Like a curtain dress. Yep. You nailed it, John. Throwing the word adult in front of it does not make it any better. It's still a freaking diaper. I don't care who's in it. Exactly. You're incontinent, right? Or willing to be. Oh, Woodstock. And you're trying to bring that back. I will say that it's Woodstock. At least had the decency to just pee on the ground. Even those Dirty hippies didn't wet themselves. Sold out. Lazy world said, you know what? Good idea. Liquid death. And they're like, what, you think it's a. We were kidding. Like, nope. Good idea. And they're like, all right, we'll sell them. And they sold, like, 80,000 of them. Had no idea that they probably just had one prototype. Isn't this hilarious? You could wear these instead of running to the bathroom. And the world said, we'll take it. Homeberg's morning sickness. Sickness. Janice Joplin, Wavy Gravy, Country Joe and the Fish. Woodstock. It's time we all said it as Americans. Wood stock sucked 1 and 2. And if they ever tried to do it again, it would suck again. But the lineup at 2, so much better. Oh, what are you looking at? Country Joe on the fish. Oh, you listen to this. Yeah. And then you're like, this sucks. Hey, Brett, this sucks. Oh, by the way, the lady next to you is giving birth into a pile of feces she just dropped. Yeah, I'll watch that instead. Everyone's like, it's the summer of love. I'm like, it looks like the summer of. To me, this is the summer of love. Who's got a Volkswagen bus that'll get me out of here? Come on, General, let's move fast. Your big chance has come at you. Be high like this. Get those reds. The only good come is one dead yahoo. I'll tell you this. Oh, boy. Going on a limb on this one. I'd go to Country Thunder before I'd. I'd get a time machine and go back to Woodstock. This would be hot chicks there if I went back to Woodstock to be a perfect combo. Brett, what chick? Better accommodations. Even the idiots at Country Thunder given birth, they know better to go to a hospital if you can get there on day one before they get like, day three is probably bad. I wonder how many thunder babies there are. Zero. Well, there's thunder conceptions. The baby tons of layers. Oh, there's. There's definitely some portage on conception, but that happens at the Phoenix Open, too. So let's not. Let's not act like that's just unique to concerts. But was your dude that looked like Jason Day or whatever, the guy, he was killing it. He looked like one of the golfers and was fooling dummies like he dropped some seed. The one girl even said, shouldn't you be playing? I didn't make the cut. And right there on the thing, it said, it's Australian. Didn't even try an accent, but he just Looked enough. Fooled him. He didn't even try his best. Paul Hogan or anything. No, didn't even do it. And he didn't know his first name. He just called himself J. Day because in the program it said J period. Day missed cut, and then had a picture of him. And he looked just like him. And I'm like, like, I'm telling all these broads, I'm J. Day. I'm like. And at the time, I didn't know his name either. He turned out to be a pretty good golfer, but this was like his first couple years. This guy's wandering around, telling him, what do you do? I'm a professional golfer. I actually missed the cut this weekend. Oh, my God. These chicks couldn't get enough of the guy. Because that's what they're there to do. Nail an athlete. I'd rather give birth myself than listen to Janis Joplin live. I was a little kid, and the day she died, I asked my dad, can I get a tattoo of her dying on me? He's like, it's not a decision you want to make. I would keep that. She's horrible. Woodstock was the worst. There's a thing. Alex makes a good point. It's my Taylor Swift argument. He says, you know why ladies in the 60s love Janis Joplin? She wasn't intimidating. She looked just like them. Chain smoking alcoholic that wouldn't blow a guy for whiskey and coke. Yeah. She represented the people that liked her. Same way Taylor Swift's incredibly average at ass. Makes girls feel unintimidated for not being that hot. I'd take Taylor Swift, though, before. Before Janice. Easy. That's. Yeah, look, I'd take you before Janice. Wow. I really stepped it up. I would give you a blumpkin before I would even smell Janis Joplin's pants. Yeah. If somebody said, here's Janis Joplin's panties. Smell these for $1,000 or blow Brett while he takes a dump. I'm like, where's Brett? There isn't a second of my life that I'm like, smell Janis Joplin's panties. What are you, Oppenheimer? I'll be in the bathroom with Brett. Oh, I got a pair of Janet Joplin's sweet, sweet Woodstock panties. I'm like, burn those. Those are toxic. Hiroshima was safer. Yeah, I'd rather live in Chernobyl then walk on carpet. That woman was once on. Oh, you want to buy this house? Janis Joplin was in it once. Nope. Moving to Chernobyl. Bye. I'm in the bubble. I'm going to eat one of those green glowing dogs. Ugh. Yuck. You made me sick this morning. I had the grace and glory of watching Tommy Emanuel last night. You bring Janis Joplin to the party, genius? Oh, that sweet voice. I don't think anybody made her pregnant and she had offspring or anything. Cause yuck. If there is a God, he didn't give her ovaries just in case. But I wouldn't even want to meet her grandkids. Too close to the honeyhole. Wait, you come from the thing that came out of Janis Joplin. Where's Brett? Is he taking a dump? That would be my makeup. Make a wish. You can meet Janis Joplin, or you can have Brett poop in your mouth and do one of those videos. I'm like, why is your mouth wide open? Huh? Oh, I thought you said Brett was here. But she's even worse. Live Joplin. She's terrible. She's not even going along with the song. It' that's what every man wants is an ugly woman who brags about being strong. I'm tough. I'll kick your ass like I believe it. You know how you knock me out? You'll take your panties off. You don't even need to use your fisticuffs. Watch this. Janis Joplin knockout punch. I'm like, you sound like James Brown. Oh, got her pants are down. Run. She's probably got Enola Gay tattooed right across her belly button. Going in there with the arrow down, silkwood suit on with that measuring the air. It's like, Janice Joplin's been in here. Little boy or fat man? A little boy. What other? I don't know. Either way, yuck. I'd have rather been if Oppenheimer said, you want to smell Janis Joplin's panties or stand out there and see what this thing does to human skin. I'd be like, I'll be out in the field in Nevada. Drop it on me, Bobby. You. Sorry. Started thinking about Woodstock and how gross it is, and if woods like, yeah, Woodstock is. It's. It's the most overrated thing. Those hippies, those weirdo hippies that just celebrate it like it was something. And yuck. Yeah, you have to go to one. Joplin, doors or 311. Oh, in that? That's my Mary F. Kill. Yeah. Mary F. Kill. That's even better. Joplin, Doors. I killed Janis Joplin immediately. Couldn't do it fast enough. I would marry Jimmy Buffett before I would listen to her say hello. Kill Joplin. And now we're in a. Now we're in a pickle. Doors and 3 11. And all I have left is Mary and F. I want to marry the Doors because at least he'll die by 27. There you go. Okay. Marry the Doors because they don't have a settlement. Except for that one dude with that awful moog that won't stop touring. Oh, he finally died. Are they all dead yet? Robbie. Robbie's still alive. Drummer's still alive. Then it's not really worth it to marry them. They're lasting too long. Long. A whirlwind romance with the Doors is what I'm looking for. I don't even think I get hard for the Doors. So I'd have to say marry the doors in F311. So at least I could. I could get hard. I could get hard for them. You know why? Because of all the hate I have for that little guy that watching him bleed from the anus might make me. I think I found my happy place there. Thanks, Brett. But Joplin's laying dead on the floor. I'm losing her blood as lube. I can't stand her. Wow. Yeah. It's a good thing she's dead, because I might take care of that for everybody. Do the world a favor. Yuck. To Janis Joplin. John, you think Janis Joplin is bad, check out her spread. No Playboy. All right. What? Good Lord. Oh, mighty. And I responded back. They didn't put her in Playboy. The camera didn't melt. There's no way they put her. She had her pants off and people. L. By the way, I just replayed our pubic maintenance conversation over the Best of. Yeah, that is a conversation I don't want to think about looking at Janice Joplin. Oh, that was unmaintained. I think that's the definition of unkempt Janice Dickinson. That can't be. You're not confusing those two. Brett might have found naked James. Hoping. I swear to God, if you show me this. Oh, it's worse than I thought. She looks like the lead singer of the Black Crows. I'd rather be Chris Robinson in the seconds. He's got more talent. Might be Shannon Hoon. Oh, how did she get worse than what I pictured? Oh, she's disgusting. Thank God for drugs and alcohol that took her out. That is just. Wow. Terrible. If I was on that beach, I'd leave like kids. You can't see this. Oh. Oh, there she is with. Oh, I'd rather. I'd rather roll around with Brady in a lubed up rubber bed. This guy says, can you imagine that thing screaming while you're sticking it to her? No, because I have to imagine sticking it to her. Thank you, Chancellor, for the validation. I had been under the impression for all these years that I alone found Janis Joplin to be completely unbearable. Wildly unbearable. The worst that's ever lived. I like that the her topless photo is on the COVID of RIP magazine. If anybody who opens it isn't going to last long. Sorry, I've gone on and on too long. There's more. I don't want to see any more. Screw Ozempic, man. Just look at these pictures. You'll never eat again. Ugh. Ugh. That's just disgusting. And you can't even hear her talking, which makes her even worse. We can say thanks to Brady's God for hard drugs and alcohol that took her out, I think. Finally, thank you very much, drugs and alcohol, for doing your job on that one. Yeah, I'd rather ladle out a Porta John. Ladle a porta John. Number two band name of 2025 John. Please tell Katie and the Hobbs that I've been very disrespectful to them. Miles to nowhere. They are Led Zeppelin compared to Janis Joplin. Look, Charlie Creedle's Led Zeppelin compared to that. We're not even talking about the look, just the auto. Anyway, sorry. Brett, what do you got on the big board of musical treat by play of James Joplin nudes? You're flaming out, bros. Flaming out. Yeah. No, you're not wrong. That is flaming out, bro. All right, wake up. Song brought to you by Action Ride Shop and her. So disgusting. Her. I can't even get through this. The guy said second show of the year and already have the best random quote of 2025. Janice Joplin panties. Hiroshima was safer. That just rolled off the tongue too, so you know it's true. According to Josh, he threw us an email yesterday. Sunrise and Snowball are open right now. It's the fake snow, but they're. They're gonna go. And so now's a good time to get in there and get all the rental gear you need and head on up north and hit the snow. And don't forget the new store. Second store will be opening up on Power and McDowell sometime around the 1st of February, so right there by the Hawes trailhead. So shop. We weren't saying there's no snow. It's been a disappointing season so far. I say get a bike. I do too. Go buy a bike. Skip the season of skiing this year and just start thinking about spring. Right. I still want to do one of those ski bikes. Did you ever talk to him about that? Does he have those? I don't know if he ordered them. I don't know if they came in yet. So I'll. I'll talk. I'll do that on dirt. I'll just push me down a hill. That thing looks fun. So go check out Action Ride Shop over there on Gilbert Road and Southern. Soon to be on power Road and McDowell as well. Or just go to the website actionrideshop.com this guy says, john, you know damn well Janice Joplin didn't have panties. They wouldn't fit over that giant bush anyway. That's true. Or panties, probably. Well, also, they would probably melt from the toxins and sewage that was leaking out of it. On the list from our earlier conversation. Johnny Paycheck, take this job and shove it for Tommy Emanuel. Lamb of God. Mediocre Minds for all of us going to work today from Bad Religion. Slayer. Mandatory mandatory suicide after seeing Tommy. Oh, my God. Offspring, Rat, Breaking Point, Skid Row, Motley Crue, Tool, Danko Jones. Full of regret for that broad Wither Tats. He's nine. Yeah. System of A Down and Nickelback. Again. We're having a debate on whether or not nine year olds should get tattoos and saying it's full of regret. Meanwhile, people are like, I also think they should be able to cut off their own balls if they want. I just don't see where our brains work anymore. You put monkey business on any list. I'm playing it. All right. I haven't heard it for a long time. Skid Row now, this is a band that didn't get the credit it deserved. Meanwhile, Janis Joplin's in, like, the hall of fame and stuff. I'd have definitely banged Sebastian Bach before Janice Joplin. I'd. I'd. Gorgeous. Yep. I would bang Janis Joplin's corpse before I bang her alive. Because it probably smells better now, man. Yeah, her being dead this long probably smells a lot better than her milling around wood stuff. Shock. There was no way she snuck up on anybody ever. There's Jimmy Hendrix. I'm g. Go speak to him. And then Jimmy Black. Jenna's coming close. Is she? I can. There she is. She coming. She's like 50ft away. Trust me, I didn't know. Jenna Smith. The other way. Tell her I'm not home. Another dude with an afro at W. Me Wasn't Me. Yuck. We all look alike. Don't worry about it. And I don't think Jimi Hendrix died of any drug overdose. I think he smelled Janis Joplin and killed himself. He was around Janis Joplin. Man, this I was. I love guitar, I'll tell you that. But if I have to see Janis Joplin again, I'm gonna hang myself. I'm gonna kill myself. And then that knock on the door. Janet opened up. Oh, man, I'm gonna shoot up. I'm gonna shoot up all the drugs. Yeah, nobody ever talks about that. Janice Jobin was on the other side of the door of every great singer that ever died. That's where Purple Haze came from. I'll kill myself. She's back. I smelled Janice in the hallway. I'm gonna. Definitely wasn't Foxy Lady. No. No. Didn't write Foxy lady about that. No. Does he have a song that's like. What's that pissy ammonia smell? That's Jimi Hendrix one. It's the uncut pissy ammonia smell. It was Leonard Skynyrd with that smell. And all of them died too. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Because Janice was on the other side of the door. Open up. Let us get it. All right, guys, let's crash the plane. I know you in there, Ronnie Van Zantt. It's skid row. It's monkey business. This is a great one. It's 98 Kup. Wake him up. It's not weird. It's pretty cool, actually. No membership fees. I have heard enough of this.