Holmberg's Morning Sickness: Thursdays with Dale Hellestrae (01-08-26)

Overview

In this lively episode, John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo welcome former Dallas Cowboys lineman Dale Hellestrae for their recurring “Thursday” segment. As always, Dale dishes on NFL news, reminisces about his playing days, and banters with the crew about the Phoenix Suns, the drama around NFL coaching changes, and this week's playoff picks. The show blends humor, nostalgia, and insightful commentary on Arizona sports and beyond.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Joy of Victory (Ravens-Steelers Aftermath)

Timestamp: 00:53–01:41, 08:32–09:12, 13:17–14:00

• John’s elation after the Ravens loss is on full display, much to Dale’s amusement.
• “When I think about the Ravens...I get real happy. Tripp even goes, ‘Jesus. It's intolerable, your happiness.’” (Holmberg, 00:56)
• Dale jokes about John “floating” into work after his team’s win.
• Reflects on Dale’s brief Raven stint, with ribbing about a botched snap:
  • “My favorite part of your career is you flopping the ball all over the field for the Ravens.” (Holmberg, 09:01)
  • Dale acknowledges his poor first game, but insists he got better.

2. Dallas Cowboys Reunion: Will Dale Hang with Michael Irvin?

Timestamp: 01:49–04:11, 10:15–11:07

• Dale and Michael Irvin keep in touch (“We texted yesterday,” Dale, 01:59) but Dale avoids legendary Cowboys nightlife.
• “He’s got 10 times as much energy as I do...He tends to go places that I do not frequent.” (Hellestrae, 02:09)
• Running jokes about Phoenix clubs like the fictional “Boom Boom Room” and being out of place as old, white Cowboys.
• “It wouldn't be that I wouldn't be welcome. It would be uncomfortable for everyone in there to go, what's he doing here? I look like a narc.” (Holmberg, 03:14)

3. Phoenix Suns Banter: Flow, Hustle, and Hope

Timestamp: 06:09–08:27, 34:02–34:38

• John and Dale revel in the improved “flow” and persistent motion of this Suns squad.
• “For the first time in four years, we're watching flow...I haven't recognized what flow looks like for four years.” (Holmberg, 06:10)
• Dale emphasizes hustle and effort, praising the new attitude and coach Jordan Ott, whom John quips “looks like a Netflix serial killer.” (Holmberg, 07:20)
• They hope Jalen Green’s return will boost the team further and caution against unnecessary trades:
  • “Don’t move a single player and wait for Jalen Green to come back…It’s like adding a player.” (Holmberg, 08:02)
• The Suns’ camaraderie is reminiscent of the Finals run: “They really like playing with each other.” (Hellestrae, 08:14)

4. NFL Coaching Carousel: Critique and Predictions

Timestamp: 14:33–21:10, 32:53–33:53

• The crew bemoans the rapid-fire coach firings (25 NFL teams without their coach at one point):
  • “They're firing everybody like crazy after two or three years.” (Holmberg, 14:38)
• Criticism of teams recycling questionable candidates (e.g., Matt Nagy for Cardinals).
• Dale and John brainstorm ideal hires:
  • Harbaugh: “No way,” but maybe a dream target.
  • Jon Gruden: “He would. It would be perfect...Even if it doesn’t go well on the field, you’ve revamped how the thinking goes.” (Holmberg, 18:41/18:46)
  • Mike McCarthy: “Wins, wins, wins. He's got the same resume as John Harbaugh.” (Holmberg, 16:42)
• They agree the Cardinals won’t land a big name unless owner Michael Bidwill radically changes philosophy, with Dale noting: “Is Michael Bidwell willing to do that? History says no.” (Hellestrae, 18:18)
• Parallels to Buddy Ryan hire (“I’m the star” mentality)—Gruden would outdo Ryan.

5. Wild Card & NFL Playoff Picks

Timestamp: 24:48–31:43

• The crew runs through playoff matchups and makes their “six-leg” parlay picks:
  • Bears over Packers (Bret)
  • Panthers +10.5 vs Rams (Brady)
  • Jaguars over Bills (Dale: “The way that Jacksonville's played of late...I'm going with the Jags.” 29:22)
  • Eagles over Niners
  • Patriots over Chargers
  • Steelers +3 vs Ravens (John: “I'm taking plus three on my Steelers right there.” 31:17)
• The potential payout is $3,000, with playful squabbling over profit-sharing.

6. Steelers Fandom: Rituals and Superstitions

Timestamp: 21:01–23:40, 36:36–39:10

• John boasts about the Steelers’ Monday night home streak (23–0).
• Dale ribs John over superstitious game gatherings and the presence (or absence) of certain friends.
• “If he show up. Yeah. Do the entertainment drill next. It’s 98.” (Holmberg, 39:26)
• Postgame emotional rollercoaster:
  • “I cannot deal with this anymore. And I’m saying goodbye to my Steeler friends…having a massive heart attack.” (Holmberg, reading his own text, 38:21)
• The group debates football pain and ecstasy—Steelers’ and Ravens’ fans alike.

7. Comic Relief & Classic Holmberg Off-Topic Tangents

Timestamp: 04:58–05:50, 35:06–36:32

• Banter about “hot” mother-daughter Instagram duos versus incest taboos.
  • “Both of them are independently beautiful. Together, it’s incest.” (Holmberg, 05:04)
• Running gags about multi-erection etiquette, weird internet content, Brett’s taste, and Dale’s cussing.
• Dale quips: “I have a one-erection per room rule. That is a huge rule for me.” (Holmberg, 36:19/36:28)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Suns rebirth:
  • “For the first time in four years, we're watching flow…” (Holmberg, 06:10)
• On NFL coaching futility:
  • “The Cardinals are so delusional to believe that any of these high end candidates want to come here.” (Holmberg, 16:21)
• On the “Boom Boom Room”:
  • “I look like a narc, so I’m gonna ask you to leave.” (Holmberg, 03:14)
• On Steelers’ playoff agony:
  • “I cannot deal with this anymore. And I’m saying goodbye to my Steeler friends…I'm having a massive heart attack.” (Holmberg, 38:21)

Timestamps for Important Segments

• Ravens-Steelers banter: 00:53–01:41, 08:32–09:12
• Dallas Cowboys/Michael Irvin segment: 01:49–04:11
• Phoenix Suns talk: 06:09–08:27, 34:02–34:38
• NFL Coaches Carousel: 14:33–21:10
• Wild Card Picks: 24:48–31:43
• Steelers streak, superstitions, and heartbreak: 21:01–23:40, 36:36–39:10
• Comic Relief (Instagram, cussing, etc.): 04:58–05:50, 35:06–36:32

Tone and Language

The episode is in typical HMS style—irreverent, self-deprecating, full of friendly jabs, inside jokes, and Arizona sports fandom. The football analysis is playful but informed, with Dale providing the ex-player’s insight and Holmberg steering the conversation with jokes and passionate diatribes.

Summary

For fans who missed this episode: it’s a raucous blend of football nostalgia, sharp sports commentary, Phoenix sports optimism, and the kind of locker-room humor that makes HMS a Valley staple. Dale Hellestrae stands as the straight-talking, dryly funny ex-pro; Holmberg, the exuberant, obsessive fan. Together, they dissect Arizona’s coaching fantasy land, debate which civic curse is worse (Jets or Cardinals), make their playoff picks, and, as always, tease each other mercilessly—whether about sports, TV musicals, or etiquette for mother-daughter Instagram duos.

For full picks, details on the Steelers’ emotional trauma, and Sun’s optimism, jump to [24:48–34:38]. For classic Dale and John tangents, tune in anytime.