01-10-25 - Technology Got John Again As HnH Ranch Went To Digital Locks And They Locked Him Out - In Trying To Buy A Rainbow Boa For Doug Hopkins' Daughter John Learns Too Much About Snakes

Summary

Summary of "Technology Got John Again As HnH Ranch Went To Digital Locks And They Locked Him Out - In Trying To Buy A Rainbow Boa For Doug Hopkins' Daughter John Learns Too Much About Snakes"
Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona
Release Date: January 10, 2025

---

1. Introduction to the Episode

The episode, hosted by John Holmberg on Arizona's #1 Morning Radio Show, kicks off with the typical banter among the hosts—John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo. While the show generally aims to entertain and provoke thought among its listeners, this episode delves into the perils of over-reliance on modern technology and the quirky adventures that follow.

---

2. The Digital Lock Debacle

Brady's Frustrating Experience with Digital Locks

The central narrative of the episode revolves around John's mishap with the new digital locks installed at HnH Ranch, the sleeping headquarters for the show's crew. Brady narrates John's ordeal of being locked out after hours, highlighting the drawbacks of digital security systems.

• Lockout Scenario:
  Brady: "I go to the HnH Ranch across the street... I look at the door and the keyhole's gone." [02:04]

John attempted to use his smartphone as a key, only to find himself stranded in the apartment hallway. The digital lock required an app and a QR code, which proved cumbersome and unreliable during a moment of urgency.

• Struggle with Technology:
  Brady: "So I was scrambling around... trapped in the hallway, trying to get in to pee." [06:47]

Brady criticizes the inefficiency of digital locks compared to traditional keys, emphasizing the frustration caused by technology when it fails to deliver simplicity.

• Host Commentary:
  Bret Toledo: "Sounds like a hotel... Now with the car and all that." [04:12]
  Brady: "Remember how in the olden days you stuffed a key in a hole and twisted it... this is not better." [07:00]

---

3. Digital Tickets vs. Hard Tickets

Transitioning from Physical to Digital Tickets

Brady extends his critique of modern conveniences by discussing the transition from hard tickets to digital ones for events. He reminisces about the reliability of physical tickets and laments the complications introduced by digital alternatives.

• Challenges with Digital Tickets:
  Brady: "Digital tickets were a better way... I just end up hanging out with Kevin Ray's family." [07:42]

The hosts express nostalgia for the tangible aspect of hard tickets, which not only serve as memorabilia but also eliminate the dependency on electronic devices and internet connectivity.

• Bret's Agreement:
  Bret Toledo: "Absolutely." [08:17]

Brady humorously highlights the vulnerabilities of digital tickets, such as the inability to access them without a functional phone or internet access, drawing parallels to his lockout experience.

• Brady: "It's pretty much the same as just having to reach for the button, touch the button, start your car." [09:05]

---

4. The Meta Ray Ban Sunglasses Feature

Exploring the Capabilities and Quirks of Smart Glasses

Shifting gears, the conversation delves into the new Meta Ray Ban sunglasses, showcasing their advanced features like built-in cameras and voice-activated controls. While the technology promises enhanced user experience, Brady points out its intrusive nature.

• Brady's Observations:
  Brady: "It tells you what you're looking at right now... 'That looks like Camelback Mountain.'" [17:54]

The hosts discuss the practicality and potential privacy concerns associated with such wearable technology, blending humor with genuine skepticism about its necessity.

• Humorous Take:
  Brady: "If I'm looking at Brett, I would say, hey, Meta, what am I looking at right now?" [18:01]
  Bret Toledo: "She's working for the company and expanding into Texas and Colorado." [27:39]

---

5. The Quest for a Rainbow Boa

Brady's Attempt to Gift a Rare Snake

The episode culminates with Brady's ambitious plan to gift Doug Hopkins' daughter, Kayla, a rainbow boa constrictor. Initially driven by the intention to be thoughtful, Brady's endeavor quickly spirals into a comedic exploration of the responsibilities and challenges of snake ownership.

• Brady's Initial Plan:
  Brady: "I was gonna get her a rainbow boa constrictor. It doesn't look like it's of this earth." [21:08]

However, Kayla raises concerns about the snake's maintenance, specifically its dietary needs, which involve feeding it rabbits. This revelation propels Brady into a chaotic quest to source appropriate food, leading to a humorous critique of reptile supply stores.

• Bret's Commentary:
  Bret Toledo: "You can buy a block of frozen pinkies." [22:05]

Brady and Bret engage in a spirited discussion about the ethical and practical implications of feeding live or frozen prey to snakes, layering their banter with exaggerated scenarios and playful jabs.

• Brady's Frustration:
  Brady: "I'm gonna have bread sauce on it. I'm not going to savage, murderous dead rabbit shops." [25:13]

---

6. Reflections on Technology and Tradition

Hosts' Final Thoughts on Modern Conveniences

Throughout the episode, the hosts weave a consistent theme questioning whether modern technological advancements genuinely enhance daily life or simply complicate it. From digital locks and tickets to smart sunglasses and exotic pet ownership, the conversation underscores a longing for simplicity and reliability.

• Brady's Conclusion:
  Brady: "I don't understand how technology, just because it's digital, it's always considered a better way." [09:19]

• Dick Toledo's Agreement:
  Dick Toledo: "That's what I like about the Aria. They give you the key card or you can do it on your phone." [09:24]

The episode concludes on a humorous note, with Brady still yearning for a straightforward solution despite the day's technological tribulations, emphasizing the enduring value of traditional methods amidst a rapidly digitizing world.

---

Notable Quotes

• Brady: "That's the dumbest I felt in a very, very long time." [08:18]
• Brady: "I was losing my mind over, like, what's wrong with keys?" [07:00]
• Brady: "It's pretty cool, actually." [34:44]
• Dick Toledo: "There's very few CEOs buying rabbit corpses. That is definitely a niche market." [30:12]

---

Conclusion

This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness masterfully blends personal anecdotes with broader commentary on technology's role in everyday life. Through Brady's misadventures with digital locks and his quest to gift a rare snake, the hosts highlight both the conveniences and frustrations that come with modern advancements. The engaging dialogue, punctuated by humorous exchanges and relatable frustrations, offers listeners both entertainment and food for thought on navigating a technologically driven world.

Transcript

[John Holmberg]

All right, HMS Podcast, time again to let you know where to go for some great comedy in the Valley this week. Get out to the Tempe Improv on the east side to see Paul Versey on Thursday and Beth Stelling Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. The Desert Ridge Improv up north features Sarah Weinschenk this Thursday and Joe Derosa on Friday and Saturday. And downtown at Stand Up Live, check out the very funny Lil Rel performing Friday, Saturday and Sunday for the complete lineups. And for tickets, go to standuplive.com desertridgeimprov.com and tempeimprov.com it's John Holberg here for.

[Brady]

The amazing people at the Core Institute, life can throw you a curveball now and again. One day you're trucking along, feeling great. Next day your dog smashes into your head and knocks you cold. Or like a KUPD listener told me this week, his dog did a sprint across the backyard directly into the side of his wife's leg and blew her knee up. She needed that need to get fixed and fixed right? Two years later, she's running like she used to again. And it's all thanks to the Core Institute. I went through it, too. And you can get rid of your pain and start saying, yes, I can to all the things you want to do. And. And all you have to do is trust the experts at the Core Institute head there right now. The Core Institute dot com.

[Brett]

You've been deceived by an agent of Satan himself.

[Brady]

He's evil. Sitting right here. Come on. No, no, he's not. He's not evil. He's just a bit rude. Good morning, everybody. Hello there. Welcome to the morning sickness. It's 5:45. My name's John. There's Brady, there's Brett, there's Toledo. Off we go for a Friday. First week of the year is, you know, for the most part, work week under our belts. Get through it today and we're out of here. I had a man. Technology. Don't you get me started.

[Toledo]

Oh, yes.

[Brady]

Well, no, no. So. So I go to the Sun's game yesterday. I had. First off, let's start here. The Suns are playing so poorly that I struggle to get people to go with me. The people that say they're gonna go at the last second have something else to do, you know, so you're the backup.

[Toledo]

Almost.

[Brady]

Now, Scott Taylor downstairs. I get a text from him later. I'm like, hey, you want to go? Oh, sure. You know, he's like, anytime you want to go. He told me that in the past, anytime I'm your backup, I'm your guy. So I text him, he's like, no, I've got. Here's what I got. Turned down for yesterday by Taylor at the game. Worst text I've ever received. I don't think anybody's ever said these words before in their lives. Sorry. I got dinner in Apache Junction tonight. Normally anything to get you out of that is going. Nope. He chose that over hanging out at the Sun's game. Sorry, Bill. No. So I was scrambling around. It's getting to be like when I had tickets to the Cardinals back in the 90s. The first couple games were fine and then, and then I was just in this mad scramble to try to get people to go to games with me. It was like this weird, like, hey. And then you get somebody and then they laugh. Well, let me see if my kids. So you can't ask anybody else because this guy's kind of giving you the 45 minute window to go. Let me see if I can go. I had somebody online, they go out. So the next thing you know, I just end up hanging out with Kevin Ray's family. And you're by yourself? Well, no, I was. Well, I went down. There was some stuff going on. So I went down there and our own brattle and had a going away party with her pals. So I said stop by, had a pop and then went over the. Went over the thing. Just kind of hung out with. I hang out with, you know, the gang, but I just, I bailed out. It's just. And then the Suns go off and win and make it. So it's one of those deals where you're like, yay, it was worth it. But prior to that technology, I go to the H and H Ranch across the street, the sleeping headquarters of Drunksville usa, which is the best thing in the world for when you're drinking and you don't want to drive. So you got a place to crash right after the game. I get there before and I've got a pee. You know when you have those moments in your car when you're like, ooh, I'm barely going to make this. So get into the parking garage, having a pee, get in the elevator, go all the way up to the top, get to the door, break my key out. And I look at the door and the keyhole's gone.

[Toledo]

I mean, the keyhole's gone.

[Brady]

They replaced all the locks at the apartment complex with these digital keypad things.

[Toledo]

Sounds like a hotel. Now with the car and all that.

[Dick Toledo]

No, you push your number.

[Brady]

No, no, it's a screen, and there's no, like, camera. So I'm. Hopkins is on the lease. Doug's the only guy on there. So I'm. I'm standing in the hallway like, I'm gonna pee on the carpet. This is not good, you know? So Doug and I go for about an hour on the phone, trying to figure out what. Because he got the email how to get this thing. You gotta download an app. You gotta get all your passwords in. He couldn't remember his passwords. Then he sends me a QR code. So I'm holding the QR code in front of the pad on the door. The neighbor lady leaves, and she goes, what are you doing? Cause I'm just holding my phone in front of the door, and I'm like, I'm trying to get in here. And she goes, that's not how you do that. She goes, do you have a fob? And I'm like, no, I don't have a fob. And she goes, the QR codes for getting in the building downstairs, there's no. You're not. You're so. I'm not kidding. 12, 15 minutes of me just rubbing the phone on the door, like, I gotta get in there and pee. Nothing. Cause I thought it was, like, in Vegas where you just touched. No. So then I. You know, Doug and I go back at it. He starts getting the emails ready to go. Everything else. He sends me the thing, and it is a. It's an app. And then instead, like, it's just not easy. It's an app. I go in here, and then I have to do this. Slide across this. The app that says unlock door. So I slide across my screen on my phone. It goes, contacting lock. It takes about 7 or 8 seconds. Lock in range. Unlocking door. And I'm like, remember how in the olden days you stuffed a key in a hole and twisted it and you were in. This is not better. Yes, it's more technological, but it doesn't mean it's better. So I go into the apartment. I'm like, I'm in. We're good. Door shut, inside, doing my thing. I can't figure out how to get out. Now.

[Toledo]

You can't just turn the knobs.

[Brady]

Well, yes, but I didn't realize that you had to do two things. First to turn the knob and get out. I'm like, I'm stuck in. Inside an apartment.

[Toledo]

At least got to pee.

[Brady]

I did get to pee, and that was nice. So then I Leave.

[Dick Toledo]

What if your phone battery went out?

[Brady]

What if the Internet's out? Yeah, well, then you're relying on the fob that I don't have. So I left my keys inside the apartment. Go right back outside the apartment, the app shuts down. Not a proper password. It's the same one I used a second ago.

[Toledo]

It's.

[Brady]

It's. I didn't change a thing. Won't let me back in. I sat in front of that stupid door from 6:30 until almost 7:30. Missed the first quarter of the game trying to get in an apartment.

[Dick Toledo]

An hour.

[Brady]

An hour and of. Just, you know, when you can't, you're not in control of anything. You're just losing your mind over, like. And you're. I'm screaming stuff like, what the. What's wrong with keys? I've never understood. The push button start in the car. I've never understood. Were we struggling with keys? Was that a thing we all agreed on? And I just missed the meeting. It was like, you know what? I hate a key in a door and having to twist that thing. It's not like I can do it from a distance. I have to be standing next to the door to do it. Anyway, the key way worked. Just because it's manual doesn't mean it was bad. Like we've talked about, Brett. Digital tickets to a concert.

[Toledo]

Oh, piss me off. Don't get me started on that.

[Brady]

Wasn't bad before. The holding tickets. Wasn't bad before. It worked.

[Toledo]

Especially when you get out to the pavilion and you can't even get on the Internet there because everybody else is on it. Your tickets up, and if it's not.

[Brady]

In your wallet, you got to go through your. Your email. It wasn't again. And I know I'll get emails for people going, okay, grandpa, it. Just because it's on your phone doesn't mean it's a better system. Hard tickets were a better way.

[Toledo]

Absolutely.

[Brady]

A better way. It worked every time. I didn't have to worry about my hard tickets battery dying and disappearing from my hands. I didn't have to go running after. Oh, it was. Oh, I'm fuming thinking about it. So, yeah, standing in the hallway, rubbing a phone on a door that doesn't have like a sensor on it in the first place was the dumbest I felt in a very, very long time. I was losing my mind. Then I go and the suns blow the first half and I'm like, I don't even know what I'm doing here. And then, you know, they end up winning the game. So they. They tickled my balls at the end. I'm like, you sons of. Anyway, yeah, I don't understand it. I don't understand how technology, just because it's digital, it's always considered a better way. And they just got. You know, I like the idea of both, right. So if you want to do this app thing, great, fantastic. But also do the key.

[Toledo]

That's what I like about the Aria. They give you the key card or you can do it on your phone. You got two. You got both ways there.

[Brady]

But give me a key to turn the knob just in case. I don't. The other shuts down, my phone's dead. Just in case. The Internet's bad, so I don't know my fob, a key or. Always worked. Always worked. You never said, my key's not going in there anymore. Cuz, you know, technology has locked it. I need a password to use my actual key. Oh, my God. I've been. I've been a crusader against thinking that we were pretty lazy about the push button starting a car. We weren't really having a problem putting a key in and turning it, were we? It's the same thing. You still have to reach for the button, touch the button, start your car. So it's the same as just putting a key in and turning the fob world. We're a. But that's not even a fob. It's just a touch. You gotta have it in your pocket.

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah, you have to have a fob. You know, your keychain could be. Instead of, you know, saving space or the weight of having keys.

[Brady]

Right.

[Dick Toledo]

All over, now you're just fob heavy fobs.

[Brady]

Tons of fobs. No, it was driving me nuts. I mean, I almost lost my mind. And it was on the heels of me getting these new awesome but very feminine meta Ray Ban sunglasses, which I'm going to use for mountain biking, but they are kind of a girl frame. What was that?

[Toledo]

I heard somebody Siri or something kick on, didn't you?

[Brady]

Oh, maybe it was. Yeah, I'm trying to get out of my apartment still. Again. Yeah, the phone is just. The phone's like, sorry, it'll be open.

[Toledo]

By the time you get there.

[Brady]

It unlocked itself. So, yeah, this guy and Gary said, dude, it couldn't be more with you. Plus hard tickets. You had a little piece of memorabilia in your hands. That was the bigger thing. It's like now I got all these digital tickets. None of them matter. Holberg's morning sickness. Holberg's morning sickness.

[Brett]

Kupt College hoops are here and there's no better place to catch the action than Hooters. Fuel up with a baller bundle 10 boneless wings, crispy fries, dressing and a fountain drink starting at just $9.99. Want to level up your game day experience? Swap the fountain drink for a Beat the Buzzer special featuring your choice of Beatbox or Buzzballs for a low price. This offer is for game days only, so grab your crew, enjoy the action, and feast on the flavors you love. Only at Hooters, the original wing joined since 1983.

[Larry McFeely]

Hey, it's Larry McFeely here with Wayne from Amco. And Wayne, now that it's getting warmer, I turned on the AC in my car and the air's blowing. Kind of cool, but it really smells like a basement.

[Brady]

What can I do about that, Larry? Your car's AC system should be checked and serviced. Plus, replacing the cabin air filter helps the air blow strong and takes away any nasty smell. Nice.

[Larry McFeely]

Is that a big deal to get done?

[Brady]

Not at all. It takes about an hour and in most cases, we can do it while you wait.

[Dick Toledo]

That's awesome.

[Brady]

I'll say. We're Amco.

[Larry McFeely]

Google Amco for your nearest location. That's Amco Double A, MCO transmissions and.

[Brady]

A whole lot more.

[Diane Fisher]

Hi, I'm Diane Fisher from Fisher Tools. From our humble beginnings in 1964 at the Phoenix park and swap to our 4 acre campus located just south of Tempe marketplace off the 202. Emmett Clintock. Fisher Tools has been building the valley for over 60 years. Come check us out and browse our huge selection of tools and anything you need to do the job right. We carry Milwaukee, DeWalt, Makita, Proto and so much more. We're also [e-mail] cup KUBD listeners will receive 10% off their order when you mention this ad. Fisher Tools. If we don't have it, we can't sell it.

[Brady]

Hey, everybody, it's John Holmberg from the Morning Sickness talking to Shane Orlando from Orlando Auto Body. Now, Shane, I take great pride in saying I stand with someone when I tell a listener to go to their shop. I know why. You tell me what's different for a KUPD listener to go to Orlando Auto Body than anywhere else. Well, first of all, we've been in the Valley here for over 34 years. We do a quality job. We work for you, not the insurance companies, so that we can work together to make sure your listeners are getting the customer service they deserve. If your car's been wrecked and you need that thing fixed the right way, get on over there now. Orlandoautobody.com Holmberg's Morning Sickness. I used to take tickets and put them on a bulletin board in my room when I was a kid. I was like in my 20s and had a bulletin board of things I had done. Now you don't even. Anyway, there's no, like, anything. I get it. I get it.

[Dick Toledo]

It is kind of. I do miss that part of it. Having tickets like. Like having the four Rammstein tickets that I had that I couldn't use in L. A. I still have them, you know.

[Brady]

Oh, do you?

[Toledo]

Yeah.

[Brady]

That's sweet. You have the hard tickets.

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah.

[Brady]

So, you know, that was. The only thing that's bad is hard tickets were harder to pawn off.

[Dick Toledo]

Right.

[Brady]

Like, it's easy.

[Dick Toledo]

You got to be able to get either face to face or you're, you know, sending in the mail.

[Brady]

Emailing the tickets to people is easier. If I want to sell them to your scalp, it made it easier for scalpers.

[Dick Toledo]

The. The only catch in that sometimes is when you email and if you put in just the wrong email address.

[Brady]

Oh, it's going to be. Takes a while figured out recover. Oh, yeah, just. I remember the old time. I just give them to you. Here's your tickets and you're getting in. Oh, it drove me nuts. This one says, so basically, your apartment complex made you a soft target standing in a hallway. What if there was a butt raper in there following you? Totally unacceptable. That's. You're exactly right, Jeremy. What if. Always wonder that. What if there was a butt raper? I think about that all the time. What if this guy walking out's a butt raper? I can't go in or out of anything. It's been a long time since I've been locked into something, but I'm not a fan of future doors. This one says, is this the future of door locks? How is the Mexican community going to make key copies? That's a good point. That's a good question. You got to have a password and an email, and who remembers that? It's another password, another email I got to think about.

[Toledo]

They'll figure it out. If they can put a roof up in 30 minutes flat, they can get a key made. It's not a big deal.

[Brady]

Yeah, the digital Mexican. Digital Mexican. Great band.

[Toledo]

There you go.

[Brady]

Great band name. This one says, hey, Holberg, I'll go to a game with you. I've never been to a basketball game much Less see how the 1% experience such event sign Swiftburg. Well, that's not that. I'm not doing that if I don't want to take the riff raff that already looks at going to the game as being part of the 1%. It's just a basketball game. You're gonna embarrass yourself. You gotta have some sort of clout. I need to see your credit score.

[Toledo]

Why don't you bring Dale with you last night?

[Brady]

Well, I didn't even think to call him up. By the time he was the only.

[Dick Toledo]

One that wanted to go.

[Brady]

Yeah, yeah. Exactly. Exactly. And that's the problem. And at the time I had gotten down to like my two. My two go tos that said they were going and Zach and then the other guy and then. Yeah. And so. But by the time it got there, I'm like, well, I'm just screwed here. I'm just, I'm just going to have to. I can't call Dale at 6. And then I couldn't get in the apartment. I wasn't even sure I was. I. I hated all of it. I hated all of it. Didn't like the evening at all.

[Toledo]

This guy says if you bought it digitally you can pick up a copy of your physical tickets at will call. But then I got to still pull up the ticket on my phone.

[Brady]

It's another.

[Toledo]

So what the hell.

[Brady]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. This one says I just toured an apartment complex and it was hard for. It was a hard no for me because the electronic door locks, they were malfunctioning the whole time. I feel for you. Yeah. I don't. It's. I did, I did not see that as an advancement that was a step back. I'd rather have skeleton keys that everybody has than this weird thing that was going on yesterday.

[Dick Toledo]

Our buddy Tom Sizer just got a. A unit and it has. They're all changed to the keypads on the front.

[Brady]

Right. Keypads make sense to me because you can dial in.

[Dick Toledo]

Another problem with that is when the battery starts to go out on the keypad. Yeah.

[Brady]

Oh for like, like, for like a garage door opener.

[Dick Toledo]

I have, I have it in the front door.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Dick Toledo]

Put in the key, it opens up, but it'll at least beep for you like a, like a fire alarm going.

[Brady]

That's kind of an old fashioned thing. You can hook it up and now like drill it to the wall. These keypads are just faceless nothing. I was nuts. But I got on after. But I had just gotten. And kind of got Excited about my new Meta sunglasses, which there's some creepiness to that, too. There's. They're Ray Ban sunglasses that have a little camera on the corner, and then you touch the arm and it turns the music on, and they tell it what you say, hey, Meta, play blah, blah, blah, and it'll play all that music for you. And then you'll. The weird thing is. And I don't know why you would ever ask this, but it does it. If I'm looking at Brett, I would say, hey, Meta, what am I looking at right now? It looks like you're looking at an Italian American male wearing a hat with an American baseball team's logo on it. To the left of him is a guitar. And it tells you exactly what, like, the glasses are aimed at.

[Dick Toledo]

And like you said, why would you.

[Brady]

We wouldn't ask, what am I looking at? Because you're looking at it. Unless it's a thing where you're like, sightseeing.

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Or a mountain. You're like, what am I looking at? Well, that looks like Camelback Mountain in Phoenix, Arizona. It. It'll do that. Or you can identify wildlife or something, I guess, maybe.

[Dick Toledo]

What am I looking at? And it sees the.

[Brady]

I'm out there staring at something.

[Dick Toledo]

Cassowary bird that's about to charge you.

[Brady]

If I see a apex predator, I can ask my glasses what it is. I don't care. I'm really. Hold on. Say, hey, Meta, what is that? A lion? Anybody but you should run.

[Toledo]

You should have been running, asshole.

[Dick Toledo]

What should I do?

[Brady]

I was watching the Steelers Ravens 2010 AFC Divisional Round game. They showed on the NFL Network yesterday and had the glasses on. And I said, hey, Matta, what am I looking at? That appears to be an American football game. The grass is green and natural, and there's some seats you see fans in. And I'm like, oh, my God, this. And then my dog Frank was down there in the same kind of. There's also a dog to the left. Like, oh, my God.

[Toledo]

You know. You know, who needs us? Sean Rockefeller.

[Brady]

Oh, my God, we need to get him. So true. Our blind listener would have a time of his life with this thing. And then, you know, you can ask it questions. It'll give you your texts. So I'm like, that's technology. Now we're advancing. It's just a pair of sunglasses. And then I. And then it turns on me because I got excited about one piece of technology, and then I couldn't even open a door. Oh, it was brutal.

[Dick Toledo]

Meta, did you open this door?

[Brady]

Yeah. Hey. Hey, Meta. How the hell do you get indoors nowadays? It's impossible. No one knows. Yeah, that's what I was thinking. Same thing, Meta. Same deal. Yeah. Anyway, so just a little beef there of standing in a hallway with, you know, my keys in my hand. And then in the email, it had the nerve to say, once you've downloaded and figured out exactly how to get in again, you can drop your key off or discard it. They're useless. And I'm like, you sons of bitches make keys great again. Trump needs to make keys great again.

[Toledo]

When that neighbor came out, you should have just started banging on the door, just covering your house.

[Brady]

Felicia, you in there, bitch? Who's in that house? Who's in there with you, bitch? Yeah, or I should have done it the other way. Cause Doug's on the lace. Doug, what's going on inside?

[Toledo]

That's even better, said Trevor.

[Brady]

You son of a bitch. Yeah, it was, but I didn't. I had Doug on the phone, and we were both just going. I talked to Doug's daughter yesterday. I didn't go to Doug's daughter's wedding.

[Toledo]

Oh, you skipped out, huh?

[Brady]

Well, I'm done with weddings.

[Toledo]

Yeah, I know, but I thought you were. Got roped into that one.

[Brady]

No, he asked. I said, I'm not going. I don't go. But I wanted to get her something nice. Like, I want to get her a nice gift for getting married. So her name is Kayla. Kayla Hopkins Stevens now. And so she's in. She had a terrarium. And I remember going to Doug's house the first time, and Kayla's had a room in the house that was all snakes and lizards and, like, neat. Like, they were neat ones, too. So I, trying to be a nice guy, was gonna get her. If you've ever seen it, it's the coolest thing in the world. A rainbow boa constrictor. Rainbow boa constrictor.

[Toledo]

Right. Beautiful.

[Brady]

It's unreal. It doesn't look. It doesn't look like it's of this earth. Like you would think it would be from the movie Avatar. They're amazing, right? So I was like, I'll get her, like, a rare snake. She's into that stuff. So I told her yesterday. I'm like, I'm working on this, and I got a couple things lined up, and I'm gonna get you a rainbow boa constrictor. And she goes, oh, no, please don't do that. And I'm like, why? And she goes, those things Eat, like rabbits. And I'm like, they do. And I'm like, well, why would they sell them to the general public? And she goes, oh, because you can get their food. And I'm like, that's the blue one on the upper right. Oh, look at how beautiful those are. That is the neatest snake ever. So I asked her, I'm like, well, if you did get it, what would we do? I thought it just ate little mice and rats. And she said, there's a place on Dobson and Baseline called, like, predator Reptiles and.

[Toledo]

Oh, yeah, I know where that's at. Right next to Rhodes. Is it across the street from the gas station and stuff?

[Brady]

Okay.

[Toledo]

A little shop.

[Dick Toledo]

You can buy a block of frozen pinkies.

[Brady]

Buy a block of frozen rabbits?

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Not pinkies.

[Dick Toledo]

Well, I'm saying everything from starting out.

[Brady]

Like, if it's a snake, I'll give you the little ones. That's not normal right there. Feeding dead rats.

[Dick Toledo]

That's for the spiders.

[Brady]

A rabbit. And I said, they have a gross of dead rabbits in the store. She goes, oh, yeah, that's a thing. That's a psychopath's fever dream is a store of frozen dead rats and rabbits. And they're making enough money off of that to continue to be a store. Brady had to close Porkopolis. He had delightful food. This guy's got dead rabbits in his freezer.

[Toledo]

Driving business.

[Brady]

Driving right along the ones, you know.

[Dick Toledo]

At times why couldn't do the boa or python. Or it makes it tougher. Is sometimes that you have to either heat it up because they need it warm. Like, not like cooking level, but yeah, yeah, like. Or you have to take it live and club. Nope, put it in a bag, smack the bag, and then put the fresh thing into the snake.

[Michael]

This is Michael with Restore My Civil Rights. I made a lot of poor decisions in my past that had lifelong consequences. After I was released from prison for the last time in 2014, I discovered the process to have my convictions dismissed and all of my rights restored, including my Second Amendment rights. Since achieving this for myself in 2018, our attorney has assisted over 3,000 others in doing the same. If you are still living under the consequences of past mistakes and would like to restore your rights as I have, visit restoremycivilrights.com and book a free consultation. Today, it's John Holmberg from the morning.

[Brady]

Sickness for lifechangerloan.com Let me tell you about Brian and Emily. Brian listens to KUPD loyally. Megan listens to the news. But both of them have Heard about Life Change alone for a long time. Both were curious. They never bothered really to look too deep since they felt good about their 20 year loan with a good rate. But they want to remodel their house and add a pool and that's going to cost about $250,000. After visiting Life Change alone, they realized they can still pay off the entire thing in about six years. It is not magic, it's math. Life changerloan.com It's Dick Toledo and new.

[Larry McFeely]

Customers right now on FanDuel get $150 in bonus bets when your first $5 wager wins. Just visit FanDuel.com KUPD to grab $150 in college hoops bonus bets with a winning five dollar bet and prepare for March on FanDuel, America's number one sportsbook 21 plus in President Arizona. First online real money wager only $5. First deposit required. Bonus issued as non withdrawable bonus bets which expire seven days after receipt. Restrictions apply. See [e-mail] gambling problem. Call 1-800-next-step or text NEXT STEP to 533-42.

[Brady]

Holmberg's morning sickness. That snake's gonna eat spaghetti, meatballs. Whatever I make for it, it's not getting any. Yeah, I'm gonna have bread. I'm bread sauce on it. I'm not going to savage, murderous dead rabbit shops. No, she talked me out of it. I still want to get her that awesome snake because I want to see that snake.

[Toledo]

There's a gift card, right.

[Brady]

And I think that's maybe what I need to do is here's a gift card to Psychopaths R Us. So you can go over there and get that.

[Dick Toledo]

I was so domesticated. Now the snakes. Someone should come up with, you know, boa chow or something, you know, nugget.

[Brady]

Yeah. There should be a, you know, kennel race.

[Dick Toledo]

We're done with dogs.

[Brady]

Should have, you know, cats, snake chow.

[Dick Toledo]

Yep.

[Brady]

And it's just delicious ground up rabbit. But I can't imagine a store like, where do they get them? You got to order them from someplace. So that means there's another store that's killing them and freezing them and selling them to stores.

[Dick Toledo]

Rabbits and mice, you know.

[Brady]

Oh.

[Dick Toledo]

Because they populate so fast.

[Brady]

But still, man, frozen dead ones.

[Dick Toledo]

I wonder if they call those. You know, we had that one friend years ago that had that rabbit rescue.

[Brady]

She'd run out of space and she needed to feed him to snakes, I guess. Anyway, that's on. That's over in Your neck of the woods at Dobson. And you've driven by it.

[Toledo]

Oh yeah.

[Brady]

Is it where the old Longs was?

[Toledo]

Between that and Rhodes. That. Right, that little shopping center with like four stores in front of the storage place.

[Brady]

Okay. So it was where the old like Peter Piper used to be here.

[Toledo]

Yeah.

[Brady]

It's the next little foreshadow that had a. That used to have an aquarium shop.

[Toledo]

That's right there.

[Brady]

That was when we were there. We were kids. There was like a tcb. No, that was across the street.

[Toledo]

Yeah.

[Brady]

There was like a. And a waterbed. Stories to be there. Yeah.

[Toledo]

And longs and bashes.

[Brady]

Where are all of our waterbeds? But yeah, I don't understand that. So there's a store if you're thinking about it. And then Kayla hits me with. I said so what are you doing? And she's got a job now. I gotta say where because I told her I would. I thought this was great. She drives one of those Mercedes Sprinter vans and she takes. It's got like a. A treadmill in the back. It's called a run Run Buddy mobile dogs. So it's Run Buddy exercises your dog and she comes to your house and your fat dog goes into the back of the Sprinter van and she puts it on thing and it's like self propelled by the dog. It's not like a treadmill where you put it on a speed and it runs. The dog has to work it and she. She does that and she's got. She works like 12 hour days because people with their apartment dogs and stuff need them worked. Right. So she does the spinner. It's like 65 bucks an hour. If you get two dogs, it's 80. So it's cheaper to have more dogs. And was this.

[Dick Toledo]

She's working for the company or.

[Brady]

Yeah, she's working for the company. And then she started to tell me that the dude who's running the company's expanding into Texas and Colorado and dude's killing it. So there I was yesterday. Like I've been humping it for years trying to figure out how to make money. All you got to do is walk. He's got like 30 of those Mercedes Sprinters. All you got to do is walk dogs and kill rabbits and you'll. You'll have all the money you've ever asked for in your life.

[Dick Toledo]

I'll go with the dog walking.

[Brady]

Right. For that awesome snake. It's weird. Did your glasses from Meta John differentiate body types? Like say things like you're looking at expired milk or that's a big fat beast.

[Toledo]

Those are my glasses.

[Brady]

You know what? The future is bright with these glasses. Yeah. This one says, remember when Sean Rockefeller, our blind listener, his phone thought you were his ex girlfriend. His ex girlfriend, Kimber. It was confused. He thought you were Kimber when he took a picture and it says, that's me. I'm thrilled with those glasses. John. Get me a pair of those. I say, hey, Meta, what am I looking at? Looks like your ex girlfriend, Kimber. Sean. And it's Brady. You really got hold of that one. Anyway, it's weird, but if you got a fat dog run buddies out there and there's nothing wrong with that. Yeah, she's killing it. Killing it. I want to get her one of those rainbow snakes. I thought that was kind of neat. Oh, what a day.

[Toledo]

Get her some sauce motos in if she's driving around the sprinter van all day.

[Brady]

Yeah, get her some.

[Dick Toledo]

Brady approved an extra set.

[Brady]

Get that boa constrictor for her and then get some rabbit sauce Moto. Man, I can't even imagine running a store like that. Like, I can't even imagine. You can't. Who do you like? You go home and say, honey, I quit my job. I'm not an accountant anymore. It's like, what are you gonna do? I'm gonna sell dead rabbits to snake owners. Like, oh, we're gonna go to. We're gonna be broke in months. Nope, we're not. It's thriving.

[Toledo]

See what their website looks like?

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Dick Toledo]

How many picture on the front of that place with Bill the Butcher from the.

[Brady]

It has to be the dead rabbits. Yeah.

[Dick Toledo]

That would be the other group though, isn't it?

[Brady]

Well, he was. Yeah, he was. He was the Build a Bush Roberts was not part of the Dead Rapids. Yeah, that was Liam Neeson's gang.

[Dick Toledo]

So I'd put him out there.

[Brady]

That was Leonardo DiCaprio's. He took it over the dead rabbits gangs in New York. Yeah, I'd have a picture of those guys for the dead rabbits, but I didn't know that you could get those. I thought. I would have assumed that. That's like a. Like you can't just buy corpses of things.

[Toledo]

Here's some of the questions on predators.

[Brady]

Reptile Center. What's that say? Baby rats or sell adult rats.

[Toledo]

But they sell baby rats at 1.89.

[Brady]

Do you guys have any hognose snakes? Ah, sure, we got those. Those are loaded with those.

[Toledo]

Two or three different types.

[Brady]

Yeah. Silk worms, weirdos, wax worms. Yeah. To me that's just weirdo. Stuff. And good on you for tapping the weirdo market.

[Toledo]

Sell crickets too.

[Brady]

Do you sell baby crickets? For my son's chameleon. Yeah. We also sell, you know, phone numbers to Lerner and Rowe for when your kid inevitably kills someone. You lunatic. You're raising Dexter. Yeah.

[Dick Toledo]

Ribbon snakes are in stock right now.

[Brady]

That should be called crazy food source. You guys have leopard geckos and things they eat. Sure. Yeah. You would like that. But I can't go into a store where there's loads of dead rabbits. I feel like that's a health code violation. Any other store that decides to pick that up. Walmart doesn't even have dead rabbits. I wonder if you can Amazon a few dead rabbits to the house. I'm impressed.

[Dick Toledo]

I'm pretty sure. I mean, because at one time Walmart was in, you know, they had a little pet section where you get, like, mice, hamsters, and fish. I think they got out of that of. Of selling snake food, selling fish and stuff like that. They would be limited. I mean, you could probably back. You know, I think they got out of it a while, like 10 years ago or something like that.

[Brady]

We get the rats.

[Dick Toledo]

I don't think you get rats there, but you could get crickets and other.

[Brady]

I've always seen the cricket bin.

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah.

[Brady]

At those pet stores. And I know what it's for.

[Dick Toledo]

That doesn't bother Smart and Petco probably have pinkies, like, frozen. How many people like buying a block of frozen spinach? Got them in the freezer.

[Brady]

Isn't that like, you've a carnivorous animal in your house? Aren't you afraid that, like, you're gonna miss and it's gonna eat a kid? Or like, it gets hungry and you skip a meal and he just. He slinks out that big.

[Dick Toledo]

Not big enough.

[Brady]

Big enough to eat a rabbit.

[Toledo]

And they got a rainbow boa there.

[Brady]

Oh, do they? Yeah, there it is.

[Dick Toledo]

450. It's pretty good.

[Brady]

That's a good price. I've been seeing them for around a thousand dollars, Those rainbow boas.

[Dick Toledo]

Real stuff with, like, our buddy Flip.

[Brady]

His son, he's got a couple of those big boys. He started to sell those big boa constrictors. They eat rattles too. I'm not interested in that. There.

[Toledo]

You flip on the phone.

[Brady]

I'm not. No, I'm not. It's just weird. I wanted to get her that because I figured it would be it. I didn't even. I figured, like, what Brady said. I think you could just go get kibble, you know, and then get it ever a thing.

[Dick Toledo]

It'd be fantastic.

[Brady]

Yeah, you get kibble for it and give it a. You know, one of those scratching posts that cats like and let it wrap around that and think it's killing something, but it's gonna get loose and kill you. There's nothing about having a boa constrictor in the house.

[Toledo]

What is the point of having a snake, too? I mean, as a pet? I don't get it.

[Brady]

People say, like that. Well, I know what it is.

[Toledo]

Maybe I'm just missing it.

[Brady]

I know what it is. It's attention for the lonely a lot of the times, because they always take them out and have them on their neck.

[Toledo]

Remember those douches on Mill Avenue back in the day?

[Brady]

Oh, walking around. There were three douches that were guaranteed on Mill Adam, the two snake guys, and the dude with Jesus's wheelies. He had his wheel cross.

[Toledo]

That's right.

[Brady]

He walked around with wheels every weekend. What are you simulating? Jesus didn't get wheels. If you're gonna do it, do it right. He's dressed as Jesus, but he's got. How dare you? He has two little Radio Flyer wheels.

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah, he didn't have the wheels. That trip would be about, I don't know, five, ten minutes, drag that thing.

[Brady]

And then head on over to what used to be the coffee plantation. Get yourself a beverage. Calm down. Yeah, I want to start a store where you can just have dead animals inside. And then I'd call the police. Every time someone came in, I'd be like, I got one. It's a bait shop for crazies. I'm here for the dead rabbits. Sure. Step over here for a second. Let's take your picture real quick. Send you off to the law. Yeah, there's very few CEOs buying rabbit corpses. That is definitely a niche market. Niche. As they say, if you have some boa constrictors, you need to feed them. That's the place to go. Evidently. That's what Kayla told me. So hop on that. Let's get a Wake up song, shall we? 585-9800 A good one and we'll scream it together. It's 98 KUPD. Wake up.

[Larry McFeely]

It's not weird.

[Brady]

It's pretty cool, actually.

[Dick Toledo]

No membership fees.

[Brady]

I have heard enough of this.